1 00:00:05,840 --> 00:00:07,840 Speaker 1: Hello, Welcome to the Happy Families Podcast. 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:09,559 Speaker 2: What are your children seeing? 3 00:00:09,600 --> 00:00:12,000 Speaker 1: What are they watching regardless of their age, Where are 4 00:00:12,039 --> 00:00:15,400 Speaker 1: they seeing it? What is showing up in their lives 5 00:00:15,480 --> 00:00:19,360 Speaker 1: on their screens? Sex and violence are an all time 6 00:00:19,480 --> 00:00:21,479 Speaker 1: high in the movies that our children are watching, the 7 00:00:21,560 --> 00:00:24,680 Speaker 1: music that they're hearing, the games that they're playing, and 8 00:00:24,760 --> 00:00:25,360 Speaker 1: of course. 9 00:00:25,120 --> 00:00:26,280 Speaker 2: Their social media feeds. 10 00:00:26,280 --> 00:00:28,880 Speaker 1: If they're over sixteen, and the social media minimum age 11 00:00:28,960 --> 00:00:31,840 Speaker 1: legislation is working in your household, things cross it is 12 00:00:32,360 --> 00:00:34,680 Speaker 1: and in bad news for moms and dads. A study 13 00:00:34,720 --> 00:00:39,000 Speaker 1: published in Pediatrics suggests that it is parents who are 14 00:00:39,040 --> 00:00:42,840 Speaker 1: often unknowingly dropping the ball. We're going to talk about 15 00:00:42,840 --> 00:00:45,199 Speaker 1: that study, what our children are watching and how we 16 00:00:45,240 --> 00:00:48,560 Speaker 1: can make sure that they are seeing age appropriate content 17 00:00:49,479 --> 00:00:51,320 Speaker 1: next on the Happy Families Podcast. 18 00:00:51,400 --> 00:00:52,000 Speaker 2: Stay with us. 19 00:00:54,720 --> 00:00:57,520 Speaker 1: Gooday, Welcome back to the Happy Families Podcast. Real parenting 20 00:00:57,560 --> 00:01:01,440 Speaker 1: solutions every single day. This is Australia's mode downloaded parenting podcast. 21 00:01:01,920 --> 00:01:03,600 Speaker 1: We are Justin and Kylie Colson and we are so 22 00:01:03,720 --> 00:01:05,920 Speaker 1: glad that you have joined us. If you'reknew to the pod, welcome, 23 00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:09,920 Speaker 1: thanks for coming along and having a listen. Today Kylie 24 00:01:10,400 --> 00:01:13,600 Speaker 1: chat about what the kids are seeing on screens as 25 00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:15,520 Speaker 1: they get older, which is kind of where we are 26 00:01:15,520 --> 00:01:18,319 Speaker 1: with our teens. It gets so hard to have any 27 00:01:18,360 --> 00:01:20,160 Speaker 1: idea at all what's going on. 28 00:01:20,560 --> 00:01:22,880 Speaker 3: Well, they're no longer living in our little bubble, the 29 00:01:22,920 --> 00:01:24,479 Speaker 3: place where we controlled everything. 30 00:01:24,560 --> 00:01:24,840 Speaker 2: I know. 31 00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:27,640 Speaker 3: They get to do, They get to see things and 32 00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:34,360 Speaker 3: hear things that we would otherwise have never let them. Yeah, 33 00:01:34,400 --> 00:01:35,000 Speaker 3: all the time. 34 00:01:35,120 --> 00:01:37,319 Speaker 1: So today we're going to talk about primarily our six 35 00:01:37,360 --> 00:01:39,800 Speaker 1: to twelve year olds. We're not going to talk about teenagers. 36 00:01:39,800 --> 00:01:45,680 Speaker 1: We're talking about our children and our tweins. Ideally kids 37 00:01:45,760 --> 00:01:50,800 Speaker 1: that aren't getting too much screen access, and ideally they're 38 00:01:50,840 --> 00:01:53,480 Speaker 1: at an age where we have some say in what's 39 00:01:53,520 --> 00:01:56,840 Speaker 1: going on, we have some level of interaction. I want 40 00:01:56,840 --> 00:01:58,240 Speaker 1: to tell you about a study, this one that was 41 00:01:58,240 --> 00:01:59,400 Speaker 1: published in Pediatrics. 42 00:01:59,440 --> 00:02:00,120 Speaker 2: It's fascina. 43 00:02:00,920 --> 00:02:05,640 Speaker 1: The researchers asked a thousand parents of children between six 44 00:02:05,680 --> 00:02:08,720 Speaker 1: and seventeen. Okay, so we're going right up until adulthood 45 00:02:09,160 --> 00:02:12,400 Speaker 1: to watch eight movie clips that were randomized in terms 46 00:02:12,400 --> 00:02:16,600 Speaker 1: of their order, and each clip contained either sexual content 47 00:02:17,040 --> 00:02:21,480 Speaker 1: or violence, and parents were asked what age their children 48 00:02:21,520 --> 00:02:24,959 Speaker 1: would have to be before being allowed to watch those scenes. 49 00:02:25,880 --> 00:02:27,679 Speaker 1: So this is kind of like when the kids ask 50 00:02:27,760 --> 00:02:30,040 Speaker 1: us if they can watch something, and we've only got 51 00:02:30,040 --> 00:02:31,680 Speaker 1: a couple of kids that are still doing that because 52 00:02:31,720 --> 00:02:33,800 Speaker 1: all of our other children are older. Now we have 53 00:02:33,919 --> 00:02:35,960 Speaker 1: four children who are eighteen and above. They don't ask 54 00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:39,200 Speaker 1: us very much at all anymore. But this is over 55 00:02:39,240 --> 00:02:40,800 Speaker 1: the years when they've said, can I watch this? 56 00:02:40,840 --> 00:02:41,440 Speaker 2: Can I watch that? 57 00:02:41,960 --> 00:02:44,799 Speaker 1: And we've consistently said, since we don't know what these 58 00:02:44,840 --> 00:02:49,040 Speaker 1: shows are, go and check common sense media. There's websites 59 00:02:49,040 --> 00:02:50,760 Speaker 1: online where we can find out what's in them. 60 00:02:50,960 --> 00:02:53,080 Speaker 3: Well, the great thing is now we have four adult 61 00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:58,160 Speaker 3: children who have done all of the market research necessary, 62 00:02:58,280 --> 00:03:01,720 Speaker 3: and they actually police the younger siblings. No, no, you 63 00:03:01,760 --> 00:03:03,639 Speaker 3: can't watch that to you're at least fourteen. 64 00:03:03,800 --> 00:03:06,560 Speaker 1: I wasn't allowed to watch that one until I fifteen. 65 00:03:07,480 --> 00:03:09,520 Speaker 3: Yeah, they've kind of made us a bit redundant, to 66 00:03:09,520 --> 00:03:11,680 Speaker 3: be honest, they had they they're really big on making 67 00:03:11,680 --> 00:03:13,840 Speaker 3: sure that the younger siblings don't get to do anything 68 00:03:13,880 --> 00:03:14,360 Speaker 3: too early. 69 00:03:14,639 --> 00:03:16,480 Speaker 1: I had a funny experience just before I go back 70 00:03:16,480 --> 00:03:17,040 Speaker 1: to this study. 71 00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:20,880 Speaker 2: In the last couple of weeks, we. 72 00:03:20,320 --> 00:03:22,600 Speaker 1: Were looking for a movie to watch on a quiet 73 00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:26,040 Speaker 1: Friday night Saturday night. We were just all exhausted. Everyone, everyone 74 00:03:26,080 --> 00:03:27,920 Speaker 1: was like, can we please just watch a movie? And 75 00:03:27,960 --> 00:03:31,200 Speaker 1: the kids spent I reckon forty minutes arguing about a 76 00:03:31,240 --> 00:03:32,040 Speaker 1: movie to watch. 77 00:03:32,400 --> 00:03:35,520 Speaker 3: Well, we need to put this in perspective. We have 78 00:03:35,560 --> 00:03:38,440 Speaker 3: an eleven year old sitting on the couch next to 79 00:03:38,920 --> 00:03:41,880 Speaker 3: a twenty four year old, like, we're trying to we're 80 00:03:41,880 --> 00:03:45,000 Speaker 3: trying to find something that's going to meet a very 81 00:03:45,640 --> 00:03:47,880 Speaker 3: varied age span. 82 00:03:48,080 --> 00:03:48,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah. 83 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:50,400 Speaker 1: So they're going through and then this started to say, 84 00:03:50,440 --> 00:03:52,280 Speaker 1: well what about this one? We liked that, And so 85 00:03:52,280 --> 00:03:54,360 Speaker 1: they're talking about all the repeats that they could see, 86 00:03:55,320 --> 00:03:57,360 Speaker 1: and finally, I don't know who it was, but one 87 00:03:57,400 --> 00:03:59,320 Speaker 1: of the kids said, oh, Emily, it's such a shame 88 00:03:59,360 --> 00:03:59,680 Speaker 1: that you're. 89 00:03:59,600 --> 00:04:00,480 Speaker 2: Not twelve yet. 90 00:04:00,680 --> 00:04:03,000 Speaker 1: Like she's a couple of weeks off being twelve. It's 91 00:04:03,040 --> 00:04:04,680 Speaker 1: such a shame you're not twelve yet, because we could 92 00:04:04,680 --> 00:04:07,320 Speaker 1: watch Pirates of the Caribbean. The rule has always been 93 00:04:07,560 --> 00:04:10,680 Speaker 1: if you're Pirates of the Caribbean, it's like a it's 94 00:04:10,720 --> 00:04:12,400 Speaker 1: like a rite of passage. You turn twelve, you get 95 00:04:12,440 --> 00:04:14,640 Speaker 1: to watch Pirates. What's that other one? 96 00:04:15,040 --> 00:04:16,880 Speaker 2: She's the man? How long have they decided you've got 97 00:04:16,920 --> 00:04:17,280 Speaker 2: to be for that? 98 00:04:17,480 --> 00:04:20,240 Speaker 3: She's twelve? But there's no breaking that rule. She has 99 00:04:20,279 --> 00:04:23,760 Speaker 3: to be twelve. The girls are so excited. Birthday night 100 00:04:24,279 --> 00:04:28,039 Speaker 3: she will watch it and the whole family will come together. 101 00:04:28,279 --> 00:04:30,120 Speaker 2: They are militant about this. 102 00:04:30,640 --> 00:04:33,320 Speaker 1: Anyway, they came to me and they said, Dad, Emily 103 00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:35,520 Speaker 1: turns two in a couple of weeks, do you think 104 00:04:36,080 --> 00:04:38,279 Speaker 1: that we could watch Pirates of the Caribbean. 105 00:04:38,400 --> 00:04:40,159 Speaker 2: And I was like, yeah, of course, easy, no problem. 106 00:04:40,200 --> 00:04:42,280 Speaker 1: Like once upon a time I cared so much about 107 00:04:42,360 --> 00:04:44,560 Speaker 1: this and I'm so much more relaxed about it now, 108 00:04:44,560 --> 00:04:46,400 Speaker 1: which is kind of where this study is going. They 109 00:04:46,440 --> 00:04:49,919 Speaker 1: watch Pirates of the Caribbean. Emily at the end of 110 00:04:49,920 --> 00:04:50,479 Speaker 1: the night. 111 00:04:50,440 --> 00:04:54,640 Speaker 3: She's like, this was the best movie ever. 112 00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:58,159 Speaker 1: Just going crazy, absolutely loved it. Anyway, I digress. So 113 00:04:58,160 --> 00:04:59,960 Speaker 1: the kids are really big on policing what they're simply 114 00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:01,920 Speaker 1: can watch. We've used common sense media a lot, but 115 00:05:01,960 --> 00:05:05,400 Speaker 1: that's become redundant because the kids have taken over that job. 116 00:05:05,880 --> 00:05:09,440 Speaker 2: Here's what happened in the study. 117 00:05:09,440 --> 00:05:12,919 Speaker 1: In pediatrics, the first clip of these eight was always 118 00:05:13,000 --> 00:05:16,840 Speaker 1: rated as being suitable only for older children. The final 119 00:05:16,880 --> 00:05:19,640 Speaker 1: clip was always rated as being appropriate for younger children. 120 00:05:19,680 --> 00:05:22,240 Speaker 1: So they kept those two things as sort of anchors. 121 00:05:23,520 --> 00:05:29,600 Speaker 1: But then regardless of the order of viewing, parents consistently 122 00:05:30,640 --> 00:05:34,000 Speaker 1: reduced their age recommendations as they watched more clips. 123 00:05:34,839 --> 00:05:38,359 Speaker 3: So I find this curious because I think that I 124 00:05:38,360 --> 00:05:39,200 Speaker 3: would be the same. 125 00:05:39,880 --> 00:05:42,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I think just in. 126 00:05:42,680 --> 00:05:46,599 Speaker 3: The small anecdote that we've already shared. Once upon a time, 127 00:05:47,080 --> 00:05:50,040 Speaker 3: the thought of my twelve year old watching a whole 128 00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:53,679 Speaker 3: heap of skeleton pirates. 129 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:56,760 Speaker 1: Sword fighting, sword fighting, helping people in half and would. 130 00:05:56,600 --> 00:06:02,480 Speaker 3: Have been mortifying to me, whereas now, six children later. 131 00:06:03,920 --> 00:06:06,760 Speaker 2: Just like, this is fun. 132 00:06:06,520 --> 00:06:11,160 Speaker 3: And here's the here's the big question, though, is this 133 00:06:11,240 --> 00:06:14,960 Speaker 3: more about temperament of children? Because I'm looking at the 134 00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:18,919 Speaker 3: way our almost twelve year old has responded to this movie. 135 00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:19,760 Speaker 2: She's cracked up. 136 00:06:20,040 --> 00:06:23,520 Speaker 3: I was sitting in my seat and the kids were 137 00:06:24,000 --> 00:06:26,560 Speaker 3: in hysterics because I jumped out of my skin a 138 00:06:26,560 --> 00:06:30,240 Speaker 3: couple of times. Yeah yeah, And Emily just laughed the 139 00:06:30,320 --> 00:06:34,200 Speaker 3: whole way through it. It didn't it didn't impact her. 140 00:06:34,640 --> 00:06:38,240 Speaker 3: And it's not because she watches ridiculously violent things like this. 141 00:06:38,480 --> 00:06:40,800 Speaker 3: Was this was an extreme case of. 142 00:06:40,680 --> 00:06:42,120 Speaker 1: What she would have It was quite an extension on 143 00:06:42,120 --> 00:06:44,120 Speaker 1: anything that we've ever leard to watch before. I just 144 00:06:44,160 --> 00:06:47,640 Speaker 1: think this is that classic situation where there's a desensitization 145 00:06:47,720 --> 00:06:49,400 Speaker 1: process that occurs. First of all, I'm going to talk 146 00:06:49,400 --> 00:06:52,159 Speaker 1: about that in a sec but this is the classic 147 00:06:52,200 --> 00:06:55,279 Speaker 1: gripe that every oldest child, you and I, both eldest children, 148 00:06:56,080 --> 00:06:57,720 Speaker 1: will complain about to their parents, like. 149 00:06:57,800 --> 00:06:58,800 Speaker 2: Hang on, hang on. 150 00:06:58,839 --> 00:07:00,480 Speaker 1: When I was that age, I was, they'vever awed to 151 00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:02,680 Speaker 1: do that stuff, and the younger siblings always get away 152 00:07:02,680 --> 00:07:03,400 Speaker 1: with so much more. 153 00:07:03,640 --> 00:07:06,120 Speaker 3: See My justification for it is there is such a 154 00:07:06,200 --> 00:07:11,480 Speaker 3: difference in the violence sheard in an extremely fantasy based 155 00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:16,480 Speaker 3: story as opposed to real life violence where real people 156 00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:20,120 Speaker 3: are being hurt and there's lots of blood and gush 157 00:07:19,560 --> 00:07:24,600 Speaker 3: and all of that. Like, that's a totally different scenario 158 00:07:24,800 --> 00:07:25,080 Speaker 3: for me. 159 00:07:25,200 --> 00:07:26,400 Speaker 2: So here's what the researchers said. 160 00:07:26,400 --> 00:07:28,040 Speaker 1: They said, the more of a particular kind of content 161 00:07:28,080 --> 00:07:31,120 Speaker 1: we watched, the greater the level of desensitization we experience. 162 00:07:31,400 --> 00:07:35,320 Speaker 1: What was once shocking eventually barely registers like a drug. 163 00:07:35,640 --> 00:07:39,320 Speaker 1: The more violence or sexual content we take in, the 164 00:07:39,320 --> 00:07:41,640 Speaker 1: more of it we need to get the same shock factor. 165 00:07:42,560 --> 00:07:43,800 Speaker 1: And I was thinking about that, and I was like, Yeah, 166 00:07:43,800 --> 00:07:44,920 Speaker 1: if you don' watch the news for a couple of 167 00:07:44,960 --> 00:07:46,640 Speaker 1: months and then you turn on the news and you 168 00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:48,520 Speaker 1: listen to what they're talking about it. So it's just shocking. 169 00:07:48,520 --> 00:07:50,160 Speaker 1: It's like, oh, my goodness, is this stuff really going 170 00:07:50,160 --> 00:07:52,240 Speaker 1: on in the world. It assaults your senses. 171 00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:54,360 Speaker 3: I want to push back on that a little bit. 172 00:07:54,600 --> 00:07:57,880 Speaker 3: When we first got married, I've always been a chick 173 00:07:57,880 --> 00:08:01,880 Speaker 3: click girl. I love nice, warm fuzzies. Happily ever After 174 00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:06,200 Speaker 3: is a good cry, and that's me done. You've always 175 00:08:06,360 --> 00:08:12,160 Speaker 3: loved real life movies that make you think, and often 176 00:08:12,520 --> 00:08:16,320 Speaker 3: they have been filled with significant real life violence. 177 00:08:16,960 --> 00:08:17,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, unfortunately. 178 00:08:17,920 --> 00:08:20,360 Speaker 1: I mean I don't like that, but I like real stories. 179 00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:21,920 Speaker 3: And I. 180 00:08:23,680 --> 00:08:27,440 Speaker 2: Back to those early days. 181 00:08:26,640 --> 00:08:31,360 Speaker 3: Braveheart and Saving Private Ryan, and there's just a few 182 00:08:31,360 --> 00:08:35,200 Speaker 3: that come to my mind. I felt physically ill watching them, 183 00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:38,880 Speaker 3: like physically ill, And to this day, regardless of how 184 00:08:38,880 --> 00:08:42,720 Speaker 3: many times I've watched a movie of that caliber or 185 00:08:43,160 --> 00:08:46,600 Speaker 3: that content, it doesn't get any easier for me to watch. 186 00:08:46,840 --> 00:08:47,480 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's funny. 187 00:08:47,520 --> 00:08:50,320 Speaker 3: I don't feel dissensitized at all in any way, shape 188 00:08:50,360 --> 00:08:52,880 Speaker 3: or form. It actually heightens my sensitivity. 189 00:08:52,960 --> 00:08:55,880 Speaker 1: A couple of years ago, having had a big break, 190 00:08:56,360 --> 00:08:58,240 Speaker 1: I went back and watched one of those films and 191 00:08:58,240 --> 00:08:58,839 Speaker 1: I couldn't watch it. 192 00:08:58,880 --> 00:09:00,520 Speaker 3: Yeah, I remember you saying that yeah, and I was. 193 00:09:00,520 --> 00:09:02,280 Speaker 1: Just like, I don't know how I used to watch 194 00:09:02,320 --> 00:09:05,520 Speaker 1: this stuff. But actually that emphasis is my point. That 195 00:09:05,559 --> 00:09:08,800 Speaker 1: doesn't disprove, that's not pushback, that's actually encouragement for what 196 00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:10,480 Speaker 1: I'm saying. When you have a big break from it 197 00:09:10,600 --> 00:09:13,160 Speaker 1: and then you see it again, it assaults you. It's like, WHOA, 198 00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:15,480 Speaker 1: what has just happened? So anyway, after the break, I 199 00:09:15,520 --> 00:09:17,640 Speaker 1: want to talk about a couple of things around what 200 00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:19,880 Speaker 1: we can do with content for our kids. Because I 201 00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:23,880 Speaker 1: speak regularly to parents. I remember a few years ago 202 00:09:23,920 --> 00:09:26,440 Speaker 1: I was talking to a parent. They had a six 203 00:09:26,520 --> 00:09:29,600 Speaker 1: year old that was watching Game of Thrones with them, 204 00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:32,280 Speaker 1: And I haven't watched Game of Thrones, but I've read 205 00:09:32,320 --> 00:09:34,040 Speaker 1: enough reviews and I've heard enough people tell me about 206 00:09:34,040 --> 00:09:35,680 Speaker 1: it to know that this is not a program for 207 00:09:35,800 --> 00:09:36,480 Speaker 1: a six year old. 208 00:09:36,480 --> 00:09:38,200 Speaker 2: In fact, I would argue that's probably not even a 209 00:09:38,200 --> 00:09:39,640 Speaker 2: program for a sixteen year old. 210 00:09:41,200 --> 00:09:42,719 Speaker 1: And a lot of people say, oh, it's not really 211 00:09:42,720 --> 00:09:44,680 Speaker 1: affecting anyone. After the break on and tell me about 212 00:09:44,760 --> 00:09:46,959 Speaker 1: what it does do, how it does affect our kids, 213 00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:49,040 Speaker 1: and why we do need to be sensitive to what 214 00:09:49,080 --> 00:09:50,319 Speaker 1: our kids are seeing on screens. 215 00:09:50,520 --> 00:10:00,000 Speaker 2: Stay with us. We're back this is the Happy Family's poble. 216 00:10:00,280 --> 00:10:02,040 Speaker 2: If you're enjoying the pod, please share it with your friends. 217 00:10:02,080 --> 00:10:02,800 Speaker 2: All you've got to do is. 218 00:10:02,720 --> 00:10:04,679 Speaker 1: Click that share button and send it to one or 219 00:10:04,720 --> 00:10:06,560 Speaker 1: two people that you think it would make a difference for. 220 00:10:06,679 --> 00:10:08,760 Speaker 1: If it could make your family happier, maybe it'll make 221 00:10:08,760 --> 00:10:11,959 Speaker 1: this happier as well. We love the podcast getting out 222 00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:15,920 Speaker 1: to more and more people. Please please share the pod. Okay, So, Kylie, 223 00:10:15,920 --> 00:10:20,280 Speaker 1: here's what happens when you watch content that is aggressive 224 00:10:20,600 --> 00:10:24,760 Speaker 1: or sexually oriented. What happens is it starts to change 225 00:10:24,760 --> 00:10:27,280 Speaker 1: your beliefs. Right, So, I've talked about this on the 226 00:10:27,280 --> 00:10:29,120 Speaker 1: pod previously. I think I might have mentioned it last 227 00:10:29,160 --> 00:10:32,560 Speaker 1: week now that I reflect on it. When you hear something, 228 00:10:32,600 --> 00:10:34,520 Speaker 1: it goes in one ear and out the other. When 229 00:10:34,520 --> 00:10:37,280 Speaker 1: you read something, that can affect the way you're thinking 230 00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:39,839 Speaker 1: about it. But you generally kind of argue with stuff 231 00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:41,800 Speaker 1: in your head when you read things. But when you 232 00:10:41,840 --> 00:10:44,360 Speaker 1: see things, all of a sudden, it becomes believable, it 233 00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:47,360 Speaker 1: becomes possible, it becomes real to you. And if it's real, 234 00:10:47,400 --> 00:10:49,840 Speaker 1: that means that that's what people are doing, and therefore that's. 235 00:10:49,720 --> 00:10:50,680 Speaker 2: What you could do as well. 236 00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:55,600 Speaker 1: And that's why there is so much noise made about 237 00:10:55,720 --> 00:11:00,480 Speaker 1: children accessing explicit content pornography because if they do see 238 00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:06,600 Speaker 1: aggression or violence or just hardcore explicit material, that shapes 239 00:11:06,760 --> 00:11:11,559 Speaker 1: their perception of what intimacy quote unquote is supposed to 240 00:11:11,640 --> 00:11:13,520 Speaker 1: be like, and therefore they're much more likely to act 241 00:11:13,559 --> 00:11:14,160 Speaker 1: in that way. 242 00:11:14,600 --> 00:11:15,800 Speaker 2: Seeing is believing. 243 00:11:16,400 --> 00:11:18,880 Speaker 1: So there was a but there's actually some research that 244 00:11:18,880 --> 00:11:21,240 Speaker 1: shows that it doesn't just affect our attitudes, which then 245 00:11:21,240 --> 00:11:25,400 Speaker 1: affects our behavior. There's some research that suggests that it 246 00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:28,120 Speaker 1: could be desensitizing. I dug this one up from the archives. 247 00:11:28,120 --> 00:11:30,440 Speaker 1: In two thousand and nine, there was a study that 248 00:11:30,800 --> 00:11:34,520 Speaker 1: demonstrated that exposure to gratuitous violence in either a game 249 00:11:34,600 --> 00:11:37,839 Speaker 1: or a movie led to reduced willingness to help somebody 250 00:11:37,840 --> 00:11:41,240 Speaker 1: who was in pain. So there were two different experiments, 251 00:11:41,640 --> 00:11:44,480 Speaker 1: and participants in these experiments took longer to come to 252 00:11:44,520 --> 00:11:47,199 Speaker 1: the aid of an injured victim, or they saw a 253 00:11:47,280 --> 00:11:50,280 Speaker 1: violent act as less serious, and they were less likely 254 00:11:50,280 --> 00:11:53,040 Speaker 1: to even hear that a fight was occurring when they 255 00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:55,760 Speaker 1: were compared with people who played a nonviolent video game 256 00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:59,319 Speaker 1: or watched a non violent movie. So if I'm watching 257 00:11:59,440 --> 00:12:03,839 Speaker 1: violent coin or playing violent content, I'm just desensitized to it, 258 00:12:03,960 --> 00:12:07,920 Speaker 1: and the American Academy of Pediatrics has argued that prolonged 259 00:12:07,960 --> 00:12:11,480 Speaker 1: exposure of violence increases agreement with the idea that violence 260 00:12:11,640 --> 00:12:15,320 Speaker 1: is an acceptable way of solving problems. Plus, it promotes 261 00:12:15,320 --> 00:12:18,480 Speaker 1: acceptance in children of what's known as the mean World syndrome, 262 00:12:18,480 --> 00:12:20,280 Speaker 1: which is a belief that the world is a dark 263 00:12:20,760 --> 00:12:22,360 Speaker 1: and sinister place. 264 00:12:22,960 --> 00:12:26,880 Speaker 3: If anything, I think this just highlights how important it 265 00:12:26,960 --> 00:12:30,760 Speaker 3: is for us to, I guess, take a little bit 266 00:12:30,760 --> 00:12:34,880 Speaker 3: more care in the things that our children watch, especially 267 00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:36,880 Speaker 3: in that six to twelve year age. 268 00:12:37,120 --> 00:12:40,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, common Sense Media and other websites like it that 269 00:12:40,120 --> 00:12:42,400 Speaker 1: give you a real clear sense of what content is 270 00:12:42,440 --> 00:12:45,840 Speaker 1: in there. I also like that website. There are Australian versions, 271 00:12:46,360 --> 00:12:49,040 Speaker 1: but I like that website. It's got a lot more reviews. 272 00:12:49,080 --> 00:12:51,040 Speaker 1: It's got reviews from kids as well as from adults 273 00:12:51,040 --> 00:12:53,000 Speaker 1: who are all saying, here's how old we think somebody 274 00:12:53,040 --> 00:12:55,400 Speaker 1: should before they're watching it. Plus the Common Sense team 275 00:12:55,440 --> 00:12:59,680 Speaker 1: as well, and the power of co watching. I know 276 00:12:59,720 --> 00:13:01,240 Speaker 1: that seeing I don't have time to sit down and 277 00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:03,480 Speaker 1: watch TV with my kids, but the power of co 278 00:13:03,559 --> 00:13:06,440 Speaker 1: watching is enormous, and I would just emphasize keep your 279 00:13:06,480 --> 00:13:08,640 Speaker 1: kids off anything that's got an algorithm. I know that 280 00:13:08,640 --> 00:13:10,880 Speaker 1: we've got legislation now that's supposed to do that quite well. 281 00:13:10,920 --> 00:13:13,320 Speaker 1: There are arguments about how well that's happening, But keep 282 00:13:13,360 --> 00:13:15,280 Speaker 1: your kids away from algorithms. I think that if your 283 00:13:15,320 --> 00:13:18,000 Speaker 1: children are under the age of twelve to fourteen, maybe 284 00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:21,400 Speaker 1: even sixteen, watching TV is going to be far less 285 00:13:21,640 --> 00:13:26,280 Speaker 1: impactful and far less detrimental than being on an algorithm 286 00:13:26,480 --> 00:13:30,520 Speaker 1: driven screen or platform. Our job is just to know 287 00:13:30,559 --> 00:13:34,800 Speaker 1: what they're watching and not to become so desensitized ourselves 288 00:13:34,800 --> 00:13:37,720 Speaker 1: that we start lowering those ages and lowering those expectations, 289 00:13:37,960 --> 00:13:39,480 Speaker 1: even if it does mean that our kids are the 290 00:13:39,520 --> 00:13:42,600 Speaker 1: only people in the world that have not seen something 291 00:13:42,640 --> 00:13:43,840 Speaker 1: that's in the Marvel universe. 292 00:13:44,920 --> 00:13:49,240 Speaker 3: My number one tip for doing this is finding your people. 293 00:13:49,640 --> 00:13:53,440 Speaker 3: When you've got a village of families are who share 294 00:13:53,440 --> 00:13:56,480 Speaker 3: the same values as you and are striving for the 295 00:13:56,559 --> 00:13:59,560 Speaker 3: same things that you are striving for. What a difference 296 00:14:00,200 --> 00:14:02,840 Speaker 3: A little chat group where you can go in and say, Hey, 297 00:14:02,880 --> 00:14:04,800 Speaker 3: my kids have been asking to watch this show. Have 298 00:14:04,880 --> 00:14:06,959 Speaker 3: any of your kids watched it? What have you noticed? 299 00:14:07,360 --> 00:14:09,920 Speaker 3: You know? What are your feelings around it? Again, you 300 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:12,280 Speaker 3: get to make your own mind up. But it's just 301 00:14:12,480 --> 00:14:15,920 Speaker 3: nice to have other families because everybody is going through 302 00:14:15,920 --> 00:14:19,920 Speaker 3: the same thing. We're all getting pressured, peer pressured. 303 00:14:20,280 --> 00:14:20,840 Speaker 2: Yeah. 304 00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:24,760 Speaker 1: Bottom line, our digital diet is absolutely desensitizing us build 305 00:14:24,840 --> 00:14:28,000 Speaker 1: the village. The violence and sexual content that our kids 306 00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:30,120 Speaker 1: see is glamorized. 307 00:14:30,200 --> 00:14:32,200 Speaker 2: It's often consequence. 308 00:14:31,680 --> 00:14:35,080 Speaker 1: Free, but there are real world consequences if this changes 309 00:14:35,120 --> 00:14:38,440 Speaker 1: their attitudes and it changes their behaviors, and we need 310 00:14:38,480 --> 00:14:41,200 Speaker 1: to be awake and alert to that because if we 311 00:14:41,480 --> 00:14:43,440 Speaker 1: not just endure it, but actually embrace it and let 312 00:14:43,440 --> 00:14:47,160 Speaker 1: the kids endorse it for our children's entertainment, I think 313 00:14:47,200 --> 00:14:49,560 Speaker 1: that we act to their detriment. Hopefully there's some ideas 314 00:14:49,600 --> 00:14:50,560 Speaker 1: here that are useful for you. 315 00:14:50,600 --> 00:14:51,520 Speaker 2: Thank you so much for listening. 316 00:14:51,560 --> 00:14:54,720 Speaker 1: The Happy Famili's podcast is produced by Justin Ruhland from 317 00:14:54,800 --> 00:14:58,080 Speaker 1: Bridge Media. Mim Hammonds provides additional support for the pod. 318 00:14:58,200 --> 00:15:00,080 Speaker 1: If you'd like more info to make your family have 319 00:15:00,520 --> 00:15:03,560 Speaker 1: or if you're struggling with ADHD in your home, visit 320 00:15:03,600 --> 00:15:06,160 Speaker 1: Happy Families dot com dot a U and check out 321 00:15:06,200 --> 00:15:08,400 Speaker 1: our Parenting ADHD course. 322 00:15:08,560 --> 00:15:10,880 Speaker 2: It will be a game changer. See you tomorrow.