WEBVTT - Uncut with She's On The Money 0:00:19.640 --> 0:00:23.239 Hi, guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. 0:00:23.320 --> 0:00:24.120 I'm Laura and. 0:00:24.079 --> 0:00:26.360 I'm Brittany, and we are happy to be back in 0:00:26.400 --> 0:00:27.200 the driver's seat. 0:00:27.200 --> 0:00:28.960 I tell you what, some weeks. 0:00:28.640 --> 0:00:31.080 I feel like I haven't recorded for weeks on end, 0:00:31.120 --> 0:00:32.040 and other weeks. 0:00:31.800 --> 0:00:34.000 I'm like, I swear we did this episode yesterday. It 0:00:34.159 --> 0:00:34.760 creeps up. 0:00:35.080 --> 0:00:37.800 It's the same day every week and it creeps But 0:00:37.920 --> 0:00:40.000 you know what, it's been a long weekend just passed, 0:00:40.360 --> 0:00:42.839 and I just quickly want to say and give my condolences, 0:00:42.920 --> 0:00:45.760 my congratulations to every single parent out there who normally 0:00:45.760 --> 0:00:48.120 has their child in daycare and a Monday and then 0:00:48.120 --> 0:00:50.560 they're stuck with their own kid because daycare is shut. 0:00:50.760 --> 0:00:52.720 Mondays are such a crappy day to have your kids 0:00:52.720 --> 0:00:55.200 in daycare because you always get shafted with public holidays. 0:00:55.480 --> 0:00:58.480 Well, those of us that don't have kids, we don't 0:00:58.560 --> 0:00:58.800 have that. 0:00:59.040 --> 0:01:01.480 Please tell me about the awesome public holiday you had, 0:01:01.880 --> 0:01:04.800 no long we can. Yeah, we don't all have those issues. 0:01:04.800 --> 0:01:07.920 So I guys, the time has finally come. 0:01:08.120 --> 0:01:10.320 I was about to say if you've been following along. 0:01:10.120 --> 0:01:11.959 My journey, but if you're listening, I'm sure you've been 0:01:11.959 --> 0:01:12.800 following along. 0:01:12.560 --> 0:01:15.319 My bloody journey. Anyway, you guys know that I. 0:01:15.560 --> 0:01:18.560 Was I am heading over to see Jordan finally, and 0:01:18.600 --> 0:01:21.320 that time has come, so I am going in just 0:01:21.360 --> 0:01:23.679 a few days time. I'm running around like a chicken 0:01:23.680 --> 0:01:25.360 with his head cut off. I have so much to do, 0:01:25.440 --> 0:01:27.399 We have so much to do for the podcast. I 0:01:27.440 --> 0:01:30.240 feel very, very disorganized and not ready for what's about 0:01:30.280 --> 0:01:30.640 to happen. 0:01:30.680 --> 0:01:34.560 But I'm so excited. We are always disorganized. 0:01:34.600 --> 0:01:37.920 There's nothing about that sentence that should come alarming to 0:01:37.920 --> 0:01:40.240 anybody who's listening to this podcast or has been since 0:01:40.280 --> 0:01:42.600 the beginning. This is just how we roll people from 0:01:42.680 --> 0:01:45.520 day one. But you know what, I was just thinking. 0:01:46.319 --> 0:01:48.000 This is the funniest story. 0:01:48.480 --> 0:01:51.120 Surely most of you have heard this by now, But 0:01:51.200 --> 0:01:53.720 I was just thinking, I have nothing to feel stressed 0:01:53.720 --> 0:01:56.240 and worried about after reading this story about this man 0:01:56.320 --> 0:02:00.360 in America that is a lobster diver. Know what I'm 0:02:00.360 --> 0:02:05.080 gonna say, Laura, No, this week, just a few days ago. Wait, 0:02:05.080 --> 0:02:06.840 are you coming to me with some world news right 0:02:06.880 --> 0:02:09.160 now that I'm completely I'm coming to you with. 0:02:09.120 --> 0:02:11.919 The craziest, most hilarious. 0:02:11.320 --> 0:02:13.520 And scary world news that I have read or heard 0:02:13.520 --> 0:02:16.880 in a very long time. So a man, a lobsterdiver, 0:02:17.600 --> 0:02:20.960 went lobster diving like he always does, and the details 0:02:20.960 --> 0:02:24.079 are a bit sketchy, but essentially he says he sort 0:02:24.080 --> 0:02:26.960 of like felt a bump, like something hid him, and 0:02:27.000 --> 0:02:30.880 then everything went black and he was like for a second, 0:02:30.919 --> 0:02:32.360 he's like, I don't know what was going on. And 0:02:32.360 --> 0:02:34.240 then he's like, oh, he's like, oh my god, I've 0:02:34.280 --> 0:02:36.720 been eaten by a shark, and that this is what 0:02:36.760 --> 0:02:38.840 he's saying. I think I'm eating by a shark. And 0:02:38.880 --> 0:02:41.320 then he was like feeling around, he couldn't feel any teeth, 0:02:41.360 --> 0:02:45.480 and then he realized he was in a whale's mouth. 0:02:48.440 --> 0:02:50.520 A whale ate him. 0:02:50.600 --> 0:02:53.720 It's not a joke. Is this like Pinocchio? It's not Pinocchio? 0:02:53.760 --> 0:02:56.919 That's the they get hiden by whale? Did he Yeah, 0:02:57.160 --> 0:02:59.960 don't you remember this? Impoque? There you go. Okay, that's 0:03:00.120 --> 0:03:02.920 a long time. But he got eat by whale. That 0:03:02.960 --> 0:03:05.640 mob dick or something. He got in by whale and 0:03:05.680 --> 0:03:06.200 no joke. 0:03:06.320 --> 0:03:09.960 So he was in the whale's mouth for forty seconds. Well, 0:03:10.040 --> 0:03:11.920 what did he stop watching out was if you were 0:03:11.919 --> 0:03:14.600 in a whale's mouth, you'd probably count it to he reckons. 0:03:14.600 --> 0:03:16.160 He was in there for forty seconds. He was feeling 0:03:16.200 --> 0:03:18.960 around and it was all smooth. He thought all he. 0:03:18.960 --> 0:03:21.480 Could do was pray that it doesn't swallow him. So 0:03:21.520 --> 0:03:23.919 he was like touching around because whale's like so the 0:03:24.000 --> 0:03:25.800 way they eat, The way it happened was the odds 0:03:25.840 --> 0:03:27.799 that is happening a slim to none. I don't know 0:03:27.880 --> 0:03:30.840 how it's happened. He's the most unlucky man in the world. 0:03:31.200 --> 0:03:33.960 The whales opens its mouth and then just cruises for 0:03:33.960 --> 0:03:35.640 a while with an open mouth, and heaps. 0:03:35.400 --> 0:03:37.320 Of stuff goes in theresuck. 0:03:37.520 --> 0:03:41.240 He got eaten, and then he was like touching the 0:03:41.280 --> 0:03:43.360 walls of the whale's mouth. And then all of a sudden, 0:03:43.360 --> 0:03:45.840 after forty seconds, which he times on his sports watch fitbit, 0:03:46.640 --> 0:03:49.600 the whale breached out of the water and started to 0:03:49.600 --> 0:03:51.640 shake its head because it obviously could feel something in 0:03:51.640 --> 0:03:53.920 there that shouldn't be in there, and flung him out 0:03:53.960 --> 0:03:55.720 of his mouth. And he's survived, and now he's just 0:03:55.760 --> 0:03:57.080 in the hospital telling a story about how he just 0:03:57.120 --> 0:03:59.160 got eat by whale. Guys, if you think you had 0:03:59.160 --> 0:04:04.200 a big weekend once again parenting your children, yeah, well, 0:04:04.280 --> 0:04:05.840 I mean you're never going to stack up to the 0:04:05.840 --> 0:04:07.040 guy who was eating by whale. 0:04:07.520 --> 0:04:08.520 Anyway, that was hilarious. 0:04:08.520 --> 0:04:10.520 But not apart from that, my long weekend because I'm 0:04:10.520 --> 0:04:13.320 going away guys this weekend. I haven't seen my parents 0:04:13.360 --> 0:04:15.520 in so long, and I just realized that I am 0:04:15.520 --> 0:04:18.760 a horrible child because they lived four hours away. Like 0:04:18.800 --> 0:04:20.320 that's not an excuse, and I just felt slack. We 0:04:20.360 --> 0:04:21.279 went to the Hunter Valley. 0:04:21.360 --> 0:04:24.720 I just cannot tell you how much wine and food 0:04:25.160 --> 0:04:26.880 we ate. It's actually disgusting. 0:04:26.960 --> 0:04:28.840 I was at the point that I was at my 0:04:28.960 --> 0:04:31.640 last vinyard and I had to unbutton my jeans at 0:04:31.640 --> 0:04:36.080 the table. It was mortifying. Well, also like fine that 0:04:36.120 --> 0:04:37.800 you eat so much at your pants pop you just 0:04:37.839 --> 0:04:39.240 take your hair out and then you wrap a hair 0:04:39.279 --> 0:04:42.400 elastic around the inside loop and then wrap it around 0:04:42.400 --> 0:04:44.000 that button and just embrace it. 0:04:44.160 --> 0:04:45.520 I still do that with my jeans. 0:04:46.000 --> 0:04:48.320 Plus yourself, you're not pregnant any well, I know, what 0:04:48.360 --> 0:04:50.960 did you get up to? Actually I did the same. Well, 0:04:51.040 --> 0:04:52.680 I mean I know that's a lie. Did not go 0:04:52.720 --> 0:04:54.880 to the Hunt Valley and didn't eat wine and cheese. 0:04:54.960 --> 0:04:56.800 I went down to Woollongong and I also spent some 0:04:56.839 --> 0:04:59.120 time with my family. I mean, I haven't seen my 0:04:59.240 --> 0:05:02.080 nan in a while, and since my grandfather passed away 0:05:02.160 --> 0:05:05.479 last year, my nan moved into a nursing home and 0:05:05.960 --> 0:05:08.760 her memory has been kind of like deteriorating over the 0:05:08.839 --> 0:05:11.240 last couple of weeks and months. And I went down 0:05:11.240 --> 0:05:13.040 there of the weekend spent some time with her, and 0:05:13.320 --> 0:05:16.200 the one silver lining of the whole thing is that 0:05:16.240 --> 0:05:17.880 she no longer thinks that she lives in a home. 0:05:18.040 --> 0:05:20.000 She thinks that she just goes to the RSL club. 0:05:20.360 --> 0:05:23.480 So she was like, that's so sweet. I was like, 0:05:23.520 --> 0:05:24.120 how have you been? 0:05:24.200 --> 0:05:25.960 She said, Oh, it's a bit lonely at the house 0:05:25.960 --> 0:05:27.640 because your granddad's not there. But I go to the 0:05:27.760 --> 0:05:30.440 RSL Club a lot, so she thinks that. Bless her. 0:05:30.720 --> 0:05:32.679 She thinks that she does where she's doing playing bingo 0:05:32.760 --> 0:05:33.640 and stuff with the RSL. 0:05:33.720 --> 0:05:35.120 She's hanging out of the RSL club. 0:05:35.160 --> 0:05:37.800 Do you know what, Whatever gets you through, Absolutely, I'm 0:05:37.800 --> 0:05:38.240 here for it. 0:05:38.320 --> 0:05:38.880 So that was it. 0:05:38.880 --> 0:05:42.400 It was a pretty low key, very family orientated long weekend. 0:05:42.480 --> 0:05:44.520 But I did also read something which I want to 0:05:44.520 --> 0:05:46.239 bring up and I want to talk to you about. 0:05:46.440 --> 0:05:48.400 Is it as funny as been in my way? Okay, look, 0:05:48.400 --> 0:05:49.840 it's not as funny as that. I'm just gonna put 0:05:49.839 --> 0:05:51.640 it out there, but I think it's look, it's something 0:05:51.640 --> 0:05:54.280 that made me feel a lot of conflicting feelings. I 0:05:54.279 --> 0:05:56.159 had a lot of feelings, so I wanted to like 0:05:56.160 --> 0:05:56.839 flesh it out with you. 0:05:57.000 --> 0:05:59.279 That's what the podcast is about, fleshed out to hit me. 0:05:59.800 --> 0:06:01.960 So some of you might have seen this, and if 0:06:01.960 --> 0:06:03.800 you haven't, then I'm going to give you the quick rundown. 0:06:04.320 --> 0:06:08.000 M Rata is in a supermodel beautiful m Radajowski. M 0:06:08.120 --> 0:06:10.880 Radajowski's been in the media in the last week over 0:06:10.920 --> 0:06:13.720 some backlash that she has received for posting a photo 0:06:13.800 --> 0:06:17.320 of her and her three and a half like let's 0:06:17.360 --> 0:06:19.920 go with three month old baby. She's just turned thirty 0:06:19.960 --> 0:06:22.200 years old and she posted this photo. It was actually 0:06:22.240 --> 0:06:25.599 a series was carousela photos of her standing there in 0:06:25.640 --> 0:06:29.839 a tiny string bikini looking like wildly insane, not even 0:06:29.839 --> 0:06:33.919 insane for someone who's just given birth, but just like extraterrestrial, 0:06:34.040 --> 0:06:37.040 Like no normal human can ever look like her before birth, 0:06:37.520 --> 0:06:40.359 or she looks like but she looks like that after birth. Yes, 0:06:40.440 --> 0:06:41.840 it's actually ridiculous. 0:06:41.960 --> 0:06:43.320 She's like a deity. 0:06:43.400 --> 0:06:46.120 It's I don't understand, she's not a real Well, I 0:06:46.160 --> 0:06:48.000 shouldn't say she's not a real human, because then that 0:06:48.360 --> 0:06:50.359 leads into the whole conversation that I'm just about to 0:06:50.360 --> 0:06:53.440 have the problem with the picture, and I'm going to 0:06:53.560 --> 0:06:55.240 like encourage you guys to go and have a look, 0:06:55.279 --> 0:06:56.839 so you know what I'm talking about. So it's a 0:06:56.839 --> 0:06:58.880 photo of her standing there in this tiny string bikini 0:06:58.920 --> 0:07:01.760 looking hot af and then she is holding her little 0:07:01.760 --> 0:07:02.640 boy kind of. 0:07:02.640 --> 0:07:03.719 Like he's a sack of potato. 0:07:03.960 --> 0:07:07.039 Now I have seen the phone holding him in a 0:07:07.040 --> 0:07:07.719 bit of a headlock. 0:07:07.800 --> 0:07:10.280 He's sort of off to the side and like fluffing around. 0:07:10.440 --> 0:07:13.320 Yeah, like his legs are dangling, and I'm kind of 0:07:13.360 --> 0:07:15.800 like gripping around his shoulders. So she's holding him close 0:07:15.840 --> 0:07:18.160 to her. The little boy doesn't have any neck support, 0:07:18.280 --> 0:07:20.600 and his legs are dangling. And then if you flick 0:07:20.640 --> 0:07:24.000 through the photos they become progressively better. It looks as 0:07:24.000 --> 0:07:26.160 though she's kind of the photos have been taken during 0:07:26.160 --> 0:07:28.640 a movement, So the first photo was taken when he 0:07:28.640 --> 0:07:30.800 was dangling, and then she's kind of flicking her hair 0:07:30.880 --> 0:07:33.680 in the second one, and then the third photo she's 0:07:33.920 --> 0:07:36.200 reaching around to help support him and lift him up 0:07:36.240 --> 0:07:38.320 a little bit. And she's posted all three photos in 0:07:38.320 --> 0:07:41.600 a carousel. Firstly, before we unpack it, I just want 0:07:41.600 --> 0:07:44.160 to say, like, we do not condone mummy shaming on 0:07:44.200 --> 0:07:45.760 this podcast. And I think, you know, there is so 0:07:45.840 --> 0:07:48.320 much guilt that's attached to being a mum already that 0:07:48.600 --> 0:07:50.840 there's always this feeling of like I'm not doing a 0:07:50.880 --> 0:07:52.760 good enough job. So I would never want to say 0:07:52.760 --> 0:07:56.400 anything or do anything that adds to somebody's feeling of that. However, 0:07:56.760 --> 0:07:59.520 but I am going to say, yeah, well, what I'm 0:07:59.520 --> 0:08:02.560 gonna say. I had a moment I saw those photos 0:08:02.800 --> 0:08:06.440 and my instant reaction was, girlfriend, what the fuck you doing? 0:08:06.480 --> 0:08:07.440 Hold your kid properly? 0:08:07.720 --> 0:08:10.720 Like that thought entered my mind and that was my 0:08:10.920 --> 0:08:14.160 very first reaction to seeing those photos. And then I 0:08:14.200 --> 0:08:16.120 sort of sat with it and like, okay, just so 0:08:16.160 --> 0:08:18.480 you guys know, she has turned off comments on the photos. 0:08:18.760 --> 0:08:22.560 She was receiving thousands and thousands and thousands of comments 0:08:22.560 --> 0:08:26.400 from people saying exactly the same thing. Piers Morgan actually 0:08:26.440 --> 0:08:28.400 tweeted some things and like, oh, look, I think that 0:08:28.440 --> 0:08:30.920 Peers Morgan is pretty problematic from time to time, that's 0:08:30.960 --> 0:08:32.960 for sure, And he wrote, that's not how you hold 0:08:33.000 --> 0:08:36.160 a baby m rudder and your millions of followers shouldn't 0:08:36.160 --> 0:08:38.400 be encouraged to do the same, happy to give you 0:08:38.440 --> 0:08:41.160 some tips if you need them, which is incredibly condescending 0:08:41.160 --> 0:08:42.280 of anyone. 0:08:41.960 --> 0:08:43.320 Or let alone a man, to write that. 0:08:44.000 --> 0:08:47.360 My first feelings were and my thoughts were, holy crap, 0:08:47.400 --> 0:08:49.840 what are you doing? And then I had to sit 0:08:49.880 --> 0:08:51.280 with that for a little while, and I was like, 0:08:52.000 --> 0:08:55.040 these photos are a moment taken in time. They are 0:08:55.080 --> 0:08:58.080 one second in time. I'm sure that she's a great mum, 0:08:58.200 --> 0:09:00.280 she knows how to hold a child. I'm sure that's 0:09:00.320 --> 0:09:02.680 not how she holds her little boy as the norm. 0:09:03.040 --> 0:09:04.880 But I guess the thing that kind of made me 0:09:04.920 --> 0:09:06.600 feel a little bit uncomfortable, and the thing that made 0:09:06.640 --> 0:09:09.040 me question is like, but why would you choose to 0:09:09.080 --> 0:09:10.760 post those photos. 0:09:10.320 --> 0:09:11.280 On the internet? 0:09:11.520 --> 0:09:13.240 Why would out of all the photos that you would 0:09:13.240 --> 0:09:15.400 have with you and your child, knowing that like, yes, 0:09:15.440 --> 0:09:17.600 it's just a moment in time, But if that moment 0:09:17.600 --> 0:09:20.480 in time is not a good representation of how you 0:09:20.640 --> 0:09:23.240 will hold your child normally, wouldn't there be a moment 0:09:23.280 --> 0:09:25.120 where you go, oh, maybe this isn't the right photo 0:09:25.160 --> 0:09:27.720 to post. I mean, this one's hard for me and 0:09:27.760 --> 0:09:29.880 not hard. It's not like I'm not around kids. I 0:09:29.960 --> 0:09:32.400 am around kids, but I'm not a mum. I haven't 0:09:32.480 --> 0:09:34.079 had a lot of time one on. 0:09:33.880 --> 0:09:35.520 One with newborns. I know how to hold them. I 0:09:35.559 --> 0:09:36.480 know they need neck suport. 0:09:37.120 --> 0:09:40.679 But could it be that maybe she knows that he 0:09:41.240 --> 0:09:43.760 is okay in that position or is that a position 0:09:43.840 --> 0:09:46.559 that is not okay at all for a child. 0:09:46.240 --> 0:09:47.080 Of four months old? 0:09:47.200 --> 0:09:49.240 It's debatable, right, Like, if he's in that position for 0:09:49.280 --> 0:09:52.160 one second, yeah, he's fine, Like we readjust ourselves. 0:09:52.160 --> 0:09:52.559 Babies. 0:09:52.640 --> 0:09:54.679 Of course they are fragile, but they are a hell 0:09:54.679 --> 0:09:56.360 of a lot more robust than what I think a 0:09:56.400 --> 0:09:59.080 lot of people think they are. Yes, a three month 0:09:59.120 --> 0:10:01.400 baby needs to have next support. They cannot hold their 0:10:01.440 --> 0:10:03.439 neck up at all themselves, and that's why his neck 0:10:03.520 --> 0:10:05.360 is kind of like falling backwards a little bit. 0:10:05.600 --> 0:10:08.560 However, one second of that is not a big deal. 0:10:08.679 --> 0:10:10.120 Can I also say that he looks like a six 0:10:10.160 --> 0:10:12.680 month old boy? 0:10:12.920 --> 0:10:14.760 That is a big boy. Look. 0:10:14.800 --> 0:10:16.840 I can only imagine that she's posted it because I 0:10:16.880 --> 0:10:18.640 saw all the hate too, and I did look at 0:10:18.640 --> 0:10:20.440 it and think, oh, that doesn't really look right. It 0:10:20.440 --> 0:10:23.280 looks like he's just flopping around. She probably didn't question 0:10:23.320 --> 0:10:25.280 it because she knows that he wasn't in danger in 0:10:25.320 --> 0:10:27.640 that second, Like you said, it was like a movement 0:10:27.679 --> 0:10:30.480 between positions that she was holding him. She knows that 0:10:30.520 --> 0:10:32.480 he was fine, so it might not have even clocked 0:10:32.520 --> 0:10:35.440 to her that she was going to receive that much backlash. 0:10:35.600 --> 0:10:37.240 And the other thing that's come to mind with this 0:10:37.320 --> 0:10:39.120 as well is that this is definitely not the first 0:10:39.120 --> 0:10:41.000 time that em Rada has kind of blown up in 0:10:41.040 --> 0:10:43.440 the media since having her little boy. So only three 0:10:43.480 --> 0:10:47.000 weeks after having her little boy, she posted some photos 0:10:47.240 --> 0:10:49.920 on her social media and she was looking smoking like 0:10:49.960 --> 0:10:53.079 there was nobody who has looked at this ridiculously incredible 0:10:53.240 --> 0:10:56.920 three weeks postpartum, and obviously like she received the thousands 0:10:56.960 --> 0:10:59.280 of comments of people being like, oh my god, that's amazing. 0:10:59.320 --> 0:11:01.640 Did you even have a baby, which is the standard 0:11:01.640 --> 0:11:04.880 response to seeing someone who looks so incredible postpartum. But 0:11:04.920 --> 0:11:07.440 Claire Holt, who is an actress, came out and said 0:11:07.480 --> 0:11:09.280 something about this, and she said, I try not to 0:11:09.320 --> 0:11:11.559 be a grinch on here, but I really want to 0:11:11.600 --> 0:11:13.880 say something because it's annoying me. If you post a 0:11:13.920 --> 0:11:17.160 picture of your completely flat stomach ten days after having 0:11:17.200 --> 0:11:20.400 a baby and call that body positivity. To me, that's 0:11:20.440 --> 0:11:22.800 the same as posting picture of the millions of dollars 0:11:22.800 --> 0:11:26.080 in your bank account and calling that success positivity. Holt 0:11:26.080 --> 0:11:28.600 said this in a video posted to her Instagram stories 0:11:28.600 --> 0:11:32.120 in March. Did m Rada because I remember that photo 0:11:32.520 --> 0:11:36.320 that she posted postpartum? Did she say in that photo 0:11:36.440 --> 0:11:38.520 that she posted it for body positivity? No? 0:11:38.720 --> 0:11:39.160 She didn't. 0:11:39.200 --> 0:11:41.120 And this is my thing. Why do we want to 0:11:41.160 --> 0:11:43.520 hate her so much? Well, this is what I want 0:11:43.520 --> 0:11:47.040 to say to this. I think just because she looks 0:11:47.040 --> 0:11:49.880 incredible three weeks after having a baby, that does not 0:11:50.040 --> 0:11:52.160 mean she can't post it. Just because a lot of 0:11:52.200 --> 0:11:54.720 other people don't bounce back to that level, that doesn't 0:11:54.800 --> 0:11:56.680 mean that is not okay for her to live her life. 0:11:56.679 --> 0:11:58.480 It's still her life. It's still what has happened to 0:11:58.520 --> 0:12:00.920 her body. She has no control over it. That's the 0:12:00.960 --> 0:12:03.120 same as somebody else that hasn't bounced back as quickly 0:12:03.120 --> 0:12:05.320 putting a photo up three weeks later. I'm saying, three 0:12:05.360 --> 0:12:08.720 weeks postpartum, every single human is different. The reason we 0:12:08.840 --> 0:12:11.920 don't like her or people like that is because we 0:12:11.920 --> 0:12:14.160 are jealous. We're jealous that our body doesn't look like 0:12:14.240 --> 0:12:16.560 that three weeks after pregnancy. But I don't think that's 0:12:16.559 --> 0:12:21.040 a reason to go and attack someone holding the baby incorrectly. 0:12:21.160 --> 0:12:23.400 I can see, and I can reason with that a 0:12:23.400 --> 0:12:25.199 little bit more with why she's received the hate and 0:12:25.240 --> 0:12:28.400 the backlash because people love to get on their high 0:12:28.400 --> 0:12:30.080 horse for this kind of thing, and also a lot 0:12:30.080 --> 0:12:31.760 of people looking at that thinking, you know, we need 0:12:31.800 --> 0:12:34.160 to help her protect the baby kind of thing. I 0:12:34.200 --> 0:12:36.480 get that backlash more, and I still when I say 0:12:36.520 --> 0:12:37.760 I get it, I'm not encouraging it. 0:12:37.800 --> 0:12:39.920 I don't think people need to go and attack the girl. 0:12:40.240 --> 0:12:43.600 I don't get when we criticize somebody for how they 0:12:43.600 --> 0:12:45.480 look after having a baby, if they look better, then 0:12:45.640 --> 0:12:47.760 we would look I just think that's wrong. I one 0:12:47.800 --> 0:12:49.640 hundred percent agree with you. I kind of sat with 0:12:49.679 --> 0:12:52.320 my immediate feelings after seeing this photo of the baby 0:12:52.480 --> 0:12:54.439 em Raudah, and then I did a little bit of 0:12:54.480 --> 0:12:56.040 a deep dive into some of the articles that have 0:12:56.120 --> 0:12:58.559 come out surrounding her postpartum journey. 0:12:58.720 --> 0:12:59.600 She's only been a month. 0:12:59.640 --> 0:13:01.560 For three months, she's still figuring this shit out like 0:13:01.600 --> 0:13:03.480 the rest of us. One of the things that I 0:13:03.520 --> 0:13:07.679 thought is really unfair is that just because somebody is 0:13:07.720 --> 0:13:11.480 in their postpartum period. Doesn't mean that they opt in 0:13:11.920 --> 0:13:14.600 to be a role model for every other person who 0:13:14.640 --> 0:13:17.360 is in their postpartum period. Like, yes, what she and 0:13:17.520 --> 0:13:20.360 the way she looks that may be unattainable, but it's 0:13:20.400 --> 0:13:23.439 not necessarily unattainable for her. That's how she looks, you 0:13:23.520 --> 0:13:24.920 know what I mean. And it doesn't mean that she 0:13:24.960 --> 0:13:27.040 has opted in to be a role model. And I 0:13:27.080 --> 0:13:28.920 think that sometimes when we look at people who will 0:13:28.920 --> 0:13:30.760 postparton and we look at what they're putting out there, 0:13:30.760 --> 0:13:34.680 there is this huge body positivity movement where we are saying, hey, 0:13:34.720 --> 0:13:37.200 it's okay to have cellulated, it's okay to have stretch marks, 0:13:37.320 --> 0:13:39.880 this is normal. Look at us, it's deliberated. Okay to 0:13:39.920 --> 0:13:40.640 be skinny and hot. 0:13:40.800 --> 0:13:42.760 It's also okay to be skinny and hot. 0:13:42.960 --> 0:13:46.120 Absolutely, And I guess like it made me kind of 0:13:46.160 --> 0:13:48.640 reconsider my thoughts around stuff as well, and knowing that 0:13:48.679 --> 0:13:52.440 my immediate reaction to that whole situation and those photos 0:13:52.520 --> 0:13:54.400 was like, girlfriend, what the fuck are you doing? And 0:13:54.440 --> 0:13:56.719 then I had to sit with that and kind of go, Okay, well, 0:13:56.720 --> 0:13:59.600 why do you feel like this is it? Because you know, 0:13:59.679 --> 0:14:01.960 the is more about her body than it is about 0:14:02.000 --> 0:14:04.960 her loving relationship with her child. Yeah, there's some other 0:14:05.040 --> 0:14:07.560 layers to that that made me feel uncomfortable. But at 0:14:07.600 --> 0:14:09.320 the end of the day, why the fuck do we 0:14:09.400 --> 0:14:12.560 care so much about somebody else's journey. Yeah, but she 0:14:12.640 --> 0:14:15.120 for sure posted that baby photo because she looks banging. 0:14:15.720 --> 0:14:17.800 It's not about the baby, like it is what it is. 0:14:17.800 --> 0:14:19.240 It's not about the baby. You can't even see the 0:14:19.240 --> 0:14:22.160 baby's face, like he's over the back of the shoulder. Well, 0:14:22.200 --> 0:14:25.360 she has very consciously never posted photos of her baby's face. 0:14:25.440 --> 0:14:27.800 Maybe the photos that she chose are very much about 0:14:27.800 --> 0:14:30.240 her body, but the reality is is that her entire 0:14:30.240 --> 0:14:32.760 instagram is about her body. Also, I think maybe that 0:14:32.800 --> 0:14:35.560 there is a whole other element to this, the fact 0:14:35.560 --> 0:14:38.720 that she is a supermodel, the fact that her entire 0:14:38.840 --> 0:14:42.320 career has been built around the way she looks. There's 0:14:42.360 --> 0:14:44.720 another level there that maybe the majority of us can't 0:14:44.720 --> 0:14:46.960 tap into or even really understand. Well, Also, she's a 0:14:47.000 --> 0:14:49.720 business owner. She owns that swimwear company that she's wearing. 0:14:49.960 --> 0:14:54.680 Does she really yes, So, so she owns a swimwear company. 0:14:54.720 --> 0:14:57.160 It's her own swim one and her business is her 0:14:57.160 --> 0:14:59.640 body and her swimmers look I'm not a mum, but 0:14:59.840 --> 0:15:02.400 I I do find the whole chat about this really 0:15:02.400 --> 0:15:04.640 interesting and I still do have my opinions on it, 0:15:04.760 --> 0:15:06.080 regardless of being a mum or not. 0:15:06.360 --> 0:15:07.680 And I just do think. 0:15:07.520 --> 0:15:10.680 Overall we're too quick to judge sometimes. I think we 0:15:10.720 --> 0:15:12.560 need to give people the benefit of the doubt. Really, 0:15:12.640 --> 0:15:15.080 that's it. And it also made me think about myself 0:15:15.120 --> 0:15:17.360 and think about photos that I've taken. There have been 0:15:17.400 --> 0:15:19.600 plenty of times where I've taken photos with Marley or 0:15:19.640 --> 0:15:22.560 even with Lola and didn't realize in that one second 0:15:22.560 --> 0:15:24.480 when that photo was taken that the sun was shining 0:15:24.520 --> 0:15:25.280 right on their face. 0:15:25.720 --> 0:15:26.720 And so when I looked. 0:15:26.520 --> 0:15:27.920 At the photos back, I was like, oh, I'm not 0:15:27.920 --> 0:15:30.320 going to post that because somebody's gonna come at me 0:15:30.360 --> 0:15:32.240 and think I've got my kids out in the UV light. 0:15:32.360 --> 0:15:35.120 All the time, I remember you posting and correct me 0:15:35.160 --> 0:15:36.640 if I've got the details wrong, but this has just 0:15:36.680 --> 0:15:38.600 hit me. I remember you posting a photo that you 0:15:38.640 --> 0:15:42.160 got backlash from with Marley. I think it was at Iceberg's. 0:15:42.280 --> 0:15:44.360 You were on a balcony, you and Matt. There might 0:15:44.440 --> 0:15:46.680 be someone else, but you also had Marley and then 0:15:46.800 --> 0:15:50.040 behind you in the photo on a wall was a 0:15:50.080 --> 0:15:52.800 sign that said it was a smoking zone. How have 0:15:52.960 --> 0:15:56.080 I forgotten this? I don't know, but I'm just this 0:15:56.160 --> 0:15:57.880 is my mum brain. This is what's happened to me. 0:15:57.960 --> 0:16:00.320 My brain is just like a porridge puddle because you 0:16:00.360 --> 0:16:03.080 were trauatized because and like I mean, you tell the story, 0:16:03.080 --> 0:16:05.080 but I just remember how much hate you received because 0:16:05.120 --> 0:16:06.760 you took her into a zone that was smoking. 0:16:06.800 --> 0:16:08.440 There were no smokers around, were there. 0:16:08.640 --> 0:16:10.800 I actually cannot believe that I've brought this whole conversation 0:16:10.840 --> 0:16:13.520 about em Rada to the table and then forgot my 0:16:13.640 --> 0:16:16.320 own fucking experience, which is exactly that. Okay, So what 0:16:16.400 --> 0:16:19.080 happened was exactly what Britt said. Mali was only three 0:16:19.120 --> 0:16:21.160 weeks old. It was my very first time out of 0:16:21.160 --> 0:16:24.240 the house, and we'd gone to Icebergs for a lunch. 0:16:24.440 --> 0:16:26.440 Like I was sitting on a travel pillow. I was 0:16:26.520 --> 0:16:30.560 still like in the trauma of post delivery, let alone 0:16:30.600 --> 0:16:31.480 post parted. 0:16:31.280 --> 0:16:32.800 Like, just give the girl some food. 0:16:32.840 --> 0:16:35.040 I had some hemorrhoids, Like I was sitting on an 0:16:35.080 --> 0:16:37.160 ice pack and I was sitting down there having a 0:16:37.280 --> 0:16:38.040 six oysters. 0:16:38.080 --> 0:16:40.360 But you were like, this is my time to shine. 0:16:40.360 --> 0:16:42.800 You were determined to go and have your first outing 0:16:42.920 --> 0:16:44.680 as a mum for the very first time, and I 0:16:44.720 --> 0:16:47.640 was exhausted. I hadn't slept anyway. I wanted to just 0:16:47.680 --> 0:16:49.920 have like a cute photo with Matt and Mary, and 0:16:49.920 --> 0:16:51.880 we walked down to the balcony. There was nobody on 0:16:51.920 --> 0:16:54.520 the balcony and I saw a sign and in my 0:16:54.640 --> 0:16:57.120 head the sign said no smoking, like I saw I 0:16:57.200 --> 0:16:59.320 saw the sign. I even saw the sign when I 0:16:59.360 --> 0:17:02.120 posted the photo, and in my head it said no smoking. 0:17:01.760 --> 0:17:03.640 Because usually that's what it would say, because. 0:17:03.480 --> 0:17:05.600 Yeah, I don't even know that I've been to a 0:17:05.680 --> 0:17:08.440 venue except for Icebergs that has like a hey, smoke 0:17:08.520 --> 0:17:10.760 here sign welcome to the smoking section. It's like, that's 0:17:10.800 --> 0:17:13.760 weird for twenty twenty, right Anyway, So I took the photo. 0:17:13.800 --> 0:17:16.960 I posted it to Instagram and got a huge amount 0:17:16.960 --> 0:17:18.840 of backlash, like I can't believe you're taking a three 0:17:18.880 --> 0:17:21.639 week old into a smoking zone, as if you were 0:17:21.640 --> 0:17:21.879 going to. 0:17:21.880 --> 0:17:23.920 Take it around a bunch of people that were actually smoking. 0:17:24.000 --> 0:17:26.080 And Daily Mail posted the articles as well, like it 0:17:26.119 --> 0:17:28.440 was a whole thing, and I felt so pathetic. I 0:17:28.480 --> 0:17:31.359 felt so stupid. I was like, how could I have 0:17:31.520 --> 0:17:34.200 made this mistake. And now that you've said that, brit 0:17:34.240 --> 0:17:35.080 it just makes me think. 0:17:35.119 --> 0:17:36.160 And I know that you. 0:17:36.080 --> 0:17:37.720 Guys are going to go and look at this photo 0:17:37.720 --> 0:17:39.720 of em Rata and you're gonna think the same thing 0:17:39.720 --> 0:17:41.639 that I thought, which is like, WHOA, that is an 0:17:41.640 --> 0:17:43.119 interesting way of holding a baby. 0:17:43.640 --> 0:17:44.400 However, like the. 0:17:44.359 --> 0:17:47.560 Situation I had at Iceberg's, a photo shows one second. 0:17:47.600 --> 0:17:49.800 It is a fraction in time. And I don't think 0:17:49.840 --> 0:17:52.679 that we can base someone's parenting or their motherhood journey 0:17:52.720 --> 0:17:55.160 or how good they are at being a mum off 0:17:55.280 --> 0:17:58.080 one single photo. And if we find ourselves doing it, 0:17:58.480 --> 0:18:01.000 check yourself because like none of us so perfect mothers 0:18:01.160 --> 0:18:03.119 totally and like maybe she was having a signy and 0:18:03.119 --> 0:18:08.359 blown in his face. Like the long weekend guys, all right, 0:18:08.440 --> 0:18:11.040 before we get into our favorite section accidently unfiltered, we 0:18:11.119 --> 0:18:13.520 should just tell you what the episode is actually about. 0:18:13.680 --> 0:18:17.600 We have the very very divine Villa. 0:18:18.080 --> 0:18:21.760 Did that, I think the very divine Victoria Divine as 0:18:21.760 --> 0:18:25.480 a guest today. Now, Victoria hosts the very successful podcast 0:18:25.880 --> 0:18:26.879 She's on the Money. 0:18:26.920 --> 0:18:28.119 I'm sure you've heard about it. 0:18:28.160 --> 0:18:32.160 She has an insane Facebook group, like I think it's 0:18:32.240 --> 0:18:35.119 hundreds of thousands of people in the group that are all. 0:18:34.920 --> 0:18:37.400 Learning about finance. Now. 0:18:37.440 --> 0:18:40.600 I know when you hear us say finance, you think 0:18:40.600 --> 0:18:42.880 it's probably really boring. But this is such a great 0:18:42.920 --> 0:18:45.520 episode with Victoria, and the reason she's got the number 0:18:45.560 --> 0:18:49.280 one finance podcast is because she makes this podcast for millennials. 0:18:49.600 --> 0:18:52.080 She dumbs down information for us, and I'm not saying 0:18:52.119 --> 0:18:55.920 it's because we're dumb. I'm saying it's because finance is 0:18:55.960 --> 0:18:59.439 a really really particular topic and not everyone has the 0:18:59.480 --> 0:19:02.560 interest in not everyone can understand it because you don't 0:19:02.640 --> 0:19:05.040 learn this stuff in school. But Victoria finds a way 0:19:05.160 --> 0:19:07.760 to make it engaging, make it interesting, and just to 0:19:07.800 --> 0:19:09.800 give you the stuff you really need to know. Because 0:19:09.920 --> 0:19:11.879 ps she also has a book that comes out tomorrow. 0:19:12.080 --> 0:19:14.320 We've done actually a really big episode in the past 0:19:14.400 --> 0:19:16.359 called Show Me the Money, which is all about dating, 0:19:16.359 --> 0:19:19.199 relationships and finances and how you go about like dividing 0:19:19.280 --> 0:19:21.600 up your finances when you're in a relationship. 0:19:21.119 --> 0:19:22.800 Or if you're a single gal or guy I live 0:19:22.800 --> 0:19:23.800 in your single life. 0:19:24.040 --> 0:19:26.560 But this episode kind of goes into that a whole 0:19:26.600 --> 0:19:29.000 lot deeper, and it also kind of just gives you 0:19:29.040 --> 0:19:31.240 a bit more financial literacy to be able to make 0:19:31.280 --> 0:19:33.160 the decisions and live the life that you want to live. 0:19:33.520 --> 0:19:36.040 But before we get into the chat with Victoria, we're 0:19:36.040 --> 0:19:38.520 gonna do Accidently Unfiltered, which is our favorite part of 0:19:38.560 --> 0:19:39.600 every episode. 0:19:39.800 --> 0:19:42.480 Brittany hit me with your story. Okay, well I just 0:19:42.520 --> 0:19:43.400 have a quick one first. 0:19:43.480 --> 0:19:47.040 That was my own accidentally Unfiltered, which happened last a. 0:19:47.000 --> 0:19:49.520 Few days ago. Sherry inmightded me out for dinner. 0:19:49.600 --> 0:19:51.440 Now, I don't know if I said it before. I'm 0:19:51.440 --> 0:19:53.359 not a very good cook. I never have been a 0:19:53.440 --> 0:19:55.760 very good cook. It's not my thing. I don't enjoy it. 0:19:55.800 --> 0:19:58.520 I cook to survive. Brittany just cooks holofresh every day. 0:19:58.640 --> 0:20:01.000 Hello fresh, I'm not keen. That's the recently Helo fresh. 0:20:01.040 --> 0:20:03.240 And when it's not hallow fresh, it's like just toast. 0:20:03.280 --> 0:20:05.320 It's like a rap or toast. But I even burned toast. 0:20:05.720 --> 0:20:06.879 You come over the other da Laura. I was like, 0:20:06.960 --> 0:20:08.080 damn it, I've had to throw my toast in the 0:20:08.119 --> 0:20:09.679 bin because I couldn't even cook it proper. No, the 0:20:09.720 --> 0:20:11.760 toast had been sitting in the toaster since the morning 0:20:11.800 --> 0:20:12.760 and it was the evening. 0:20:12.840 --> 0:20:14.760 That's what had actually happened. I walked in. 0:20:14.840 --> 0:20:16.159 She was like, I just threw my breakfast in the 0:20:16.160 --> 0:20:17.720 bin and I've been sitting in the toaster all day. 0:20:18.000 --> 0:20:19.200 Oh it's one of those weeks. 0:20:19.240 --> 0:20:21.760 Anyway, Sherry invites me up because she's a nutritionist. She's 0:20:21.800 --> 0:20:23.480 a really good cook. She he loves it, she frosts it. 0:20:23.600 --> 0:20:25.600 So she's always cooks his elaborate food. So I got 0:20:25.640 --> 0:20:27.240 up there to get my home cooked meal. 0:20:27.440 --> 0:20:30.200 Hit. She asked me to do one job while she's 0:20:30.200 --> 0:20:31.880 slaving away. You're gonna laugh. 0:20:31.880 --> 0:20:35.399 I make my specialty is just like a rap with 0:20:36.000 --> 0:20:36.960 garlic and butter on it. 0:20:36.960 --> 0:20:37.960 It's just a garlic bread. 0:20:37.800 --> 0:20:38.160 On a rap. 0:20:38.200 --> 0:20:39.280 That's what I do. And then I put in the 0:20:39.359 --> 0:20:40.000 arbit That's all I do. 0:20:40.080 --> 0:20:41.720 So she's like, can you just whive up the entree 0:20:41.760 --> 0:20:44.840 which is like literally a garlic bread And I was like, yes, yes, 0:20:44.880 --> 0:20:46.919 I can nailing it. And they were like because Jay 0:20:46.960 --> 0:20:48.679 as well, They're both like, that's you do that really well. 0:20:48.720 --> 0:20:51.280 They're really encouraging of me. And it was like, in 0:20:51.359 --> 0:20:53.080 the morning, you don't have to prop me up. I'll 0:20:53.080 --> 0:20:55.360 make the garlic bread. So I go and get the rap, 0:20:56.160 --> 0:20:57.800 get the butter, get the crush garlic. 0:20:57.920 --> 0:20:59.680 That's it. It's not hard. And I sprinkle some cheese 0:20:59.680 --> 0:21:01.720 on top. Sorry, butted it up. Then I put all 0:21:01.800 --> 0:21:04.280 the crushed out of the jar, crushed garlic on it, 0:21:04.320 --> 0:21:05.840 and I put the cheese on it, put in the oven. 0:21:06.480 --> 0:21:08.400 Ten minutes later I come back, I'm like, fuck, yeah, 0:21:08.440 --> 0:21:09.280 now that's perfect. 0:21:09.680 --> 0:21:14.840 We're bite into it simultaneously. And I realized that I 0:21:14.920 --> 0:21:22.199 covered it in ginger. It's just crushed ginger. So you 0:21:22.240 --> 0:21:25.320 know that you have like master food, crushed garlics and ginger. 0:21:25.320 --> 0:21:26.360 They come in the same jar. 0:21:26.840 --> 0:21:28.320 I'm going to tell you that I have those in 0:21:28.359 --> 0:21:30.280 my fridge and the ginger does not look like garlic 0:21:30.960 --> 0:21:31.920 would not look the same. 0:21:32.520 --> 0:21:34.720 I'm blacked out. I don't know what happened anyway, that 0:21:34.760 --> 0:21:35.720 was really funny like that. 0:21:35.720 --> 0:21:37.520 You're keeping like it's been it's been a tough week, 0:21:37.560 --> 0:21:39.320 and it's like, no, it's just been a tough life. 0:21:40.480 --> 0:21:41.160 It's a tough life. 0:21:41.520 --> 0:21:43.280 Okay, all right, Well, I've got one that's been written 0:21:43.320 --> 0:21:44.560 in by a listener, and here we are. 0:21:44.640 --> 0:21:45.800 It's actually a really sweet one. 0:21:45.880 --> 0:21:47.800 None of these ones today have anything to do with poop, 0:21:47.920 --> 0:21:50.840 which is a real highlight for us. It was the 0:21:50.880 --> 0:21:52.600 first day at a new job and it was a 0:21:52.600 --> 0:21:55.560 small regional office, so only about eleven staff in the office. 0:21:55.680 --> 0:21:59.119 It was lunchtime and I was starving. I went and 0:21:59.160 --> 0:22:00.760 I got my lunch out of the fridge that my 0:22:00.840 --> 0:22:03.320 boyfriend had made me, and I was so hungry I 0:22:03.400 --> 0:22:05.720 just started inhaling it. It was really cute that he'd 0:22:05.720 --> 0:22:07.200 made it for me because it was my first day 0:22:07.240 --> 0:22:09.359 of work and he was really proud of me. So 0:22:09.440 --> 0:22:13.040 I was pleasantly surprised as it was a delicious pearl cuscous. 0:22:12.720 --> 0:22:14.600 Salad with all my favorite things. 0:22:14.840 --> 0:22:17.840 It was halloomi and avocado and yummy yogat dressing, you 0:22:17.920 --> 0:22:20.560 name it. My boyfriend had never made anything so delicious 0:22:20.600 --> 0:22:23.199 or special for me before. My new boss came in 0:22:23.440 --> 0:22:25.359 and looked in the fridge and then looked at me, 0:22:25.920 --> 0:22:29.560 and then looked back at the fridge and said, are you. 0:22:29.480 --> 0:22:32.879 Need my lunch? I saw that coming. 0:22:33.040 --> 0:22:34.560 I looked at it her and looked back at my 0:22:34.680 --> 0:22:37.359 now almost empty container before a dawn on me that 0:22:37.400 --> 0:22:39.399 I had never even taken my lunch out of my 0:22:39.480 --> 0:22:43.600 fucking bag. Mortified, safe to say, she didn't want my 0:22:43.600 --> 0:22:45.679 shitty past to salad that my boyfriend made that had 0:22:45.720 --> 0:22:48.719 absolutely no trimmings. Anyway, I'm still known as the girl 0:22:48.760 --> 0:22:49.760 who was the lunch stooler. 0:22:50.320 --> 0:22:52.600 Les also of many day to do it day one 0:22:52.640 --> 0:22:56.000 of your new jobs, like the Lash's lunch. 0:22:56.080 --> 0:22:58.440 Do you know what Matt's best friend, Oh, this is 0:22:58.480 --> 0:23:00.600 going to come back to buye me. Best friend when 0:23:00.640 --> 0:23:02.680 he used to live in the UK, used to steal 0:23:02.720 --> 0:23:07.720 people's lunches. I think that pisces that piss. 0:23:08.480 --> 0:23:09.520 That is not okay. 0:23:09.640 --> 0:23:11.720 He'd just be like, oh, well, looks good. I'll have 0:23:11.760 --> 0:23:14.480 a couple of spoonfuls of that person's lunch. When fucked up, 0:23:15.000 --> 0:23:17.840 you've done the same. No, this is actually fucked up. 0:23:18.119 --> 0:23:20.040 This was someone we used to work with years and 0:23:20.119 --> 0:23:22.879 years and years ago. I'm not going to tell you 0:23:22.920 --> 0:23:25.000 him what department or what they did. I don't even 0:23:25.040 --> 0:23:27.680 remember their name. They got fired. But what they were 0:23:27.720 --> 0:23:30.560 for stealing lunch no worse. I mean that's a that's 0:23:30.600 --> 0:23:32.040 a fireable offense right there. 0:23:32.040 --> 0:23:32.399 It is. 0:23:32.440 --> 0:23:35.600 But they were a loose cannon. He was so convinced 0:23:35.600 --> 0:23:37.800 that people were taking his lunch. They I don't think 0:23:37.800 --> 0:23:39.720 they were. I think he actually had some things going 0:23:39.760 --> 0:23:42.840 on upstairs. He was so convinced that he started to 0:23:42.840 --> 0:23:45.119 bring his lunch in put in the fridge. Then he 0:23:45.160 --> 0:23:50.080 would put and I'm not exaggerating, a dead rat on 0:23:50.160 --> 0:23:54.520 the top of the lunch so that no one so 0:23:54.560 --> 0:23:57.560 that no one would take it, because that was that I'm. 0:23:57.400 --> 0:23:59.120 Not kidding, And then he would eat his own lunch. 0:23:59.160 --> 0:24:00.880 They had had a dead on top of it, yeah, 0:24:00.880 --> 0:24:01.760 because then no one had steal it. 0:24:01.800 --> 0:24:06.640 I had dead run on anyway, good fire. He's a sicko. Obviously. 0:24:11.160 --> 0:24:13.800 When I was like really poor, and I don't say 0:24:13.840 --> 0:24:15.720 I was really poor, lightly like when I was like 0:24:15.840 --> 0:24:17.720 in Uni and I had moved out of home and 0:24:17.800 --> 0:24:19.720 had no money, and I was working in a job 0:24:19.720 --> 0:24:21.879 that paid me thirty thousand dollars a year, but I 0:24:21.920 --> 0:24:23.520 was living outside of homes, I had pay rent and 0:24:23.520 --> 0:24:24.080 everything else. 0:24:24.320 --> 0:24:26.800 Like it was grim. I reconized all of you lunch, 0:24:27.760 --> 0:24:32.000 did you from whom at the work? No, just I 0:24:32.000 --> 0:24:34.000 wouldn't steal whole lunch. I'd just steal a bit of 0:24:34.000 --> 0:24:36.480 a lunch or just one bite of the singer and 0:24:36.480 --> 0:24:38.360 put it back. If it was like they'd had yogurt 0:24:38.400 --> 0:24:39.440 or something, just take a yoga. 0:24:39.560 --> 0:24:40.000 Sure, Rah. 0:24:40.200 --> 0:24:42.440 I was young and wild and. 0:24:42.400 --> 0:24:47.159 Frame and poor at what work enviroment, we were the 0:24:47.240 --> 0:24:49.439 lunches that you were stealing like properly from a cafe 0:24:49.560 --> 0:24:52.640 or from like no from the fridge, other like your work, yeah, 0:24:52.640 --> 0:24:54.240 from like my stuff and no one ever like my 0:24:54.280 --> 0:25:01.000 colleagues who like are my friends good friends? All right, guys, 0:25:01.040 --> 0:25:07.600 let's get his interview with Victoria. We are lucky enough 0:25:07.600 --> 0:25:11.439 to have financial expert Victoria Divine on the podcast today. 0:25:11.720 --> 0:25:14.120 And now, look, Laura and I we love money. Let's 0:25:14.119 --> 0:25:14.400 be real. 0:25:14.600 --> 0:25:16.600 I love money, but that's about as much as we 0:25:16.640 --> 0:25:17.320 know about money. 0:25:17.520 --> 0:25:19.679 I don't have enough money, but I still really love it. 0:25:19.960 --> 0:25:22.280 No, but we want to know how we can get more, 0:25:22.320 --> 0:25:24.399 so we got Victoria on the pod. Victoria is a 0:25:24.480 --> 0:25:28.359 multi award winning financial advisor who is literally transforming the 0:25:28.359 --> 0:25:31.359 way millennials think about money because all we think about 0:25:31.480 --> 0:25:34.480 is spending it and buying avocado. On host with a 0:25:34.520 --> 0:25:38.840 background in behavioral psychology, her own financial advisory business, and 0:25:39.040 --> 0:25:41.320 a chart topping podcast which we all know and love 0:25:41.440 --> 0:25:44.760 called She's on the Money, Victoria knows what makes millennials 0:25:44.760 --> 0:25:48.160 tick and how we should and shouldn't be spending our money. 0:25:48.200 --> 0:25:51.600 So Victoria, welcome to Life on Cut and we can't 0:25:51.640 --> 0:25:53.639 wait for you to make as millionaires. 0:25:54.600 --> 0:25:57.600 Well, I hate to break it to you, but that's 0:25:57.880 --> 0:26:00.800 probably not what we're going to do to but you 0:26:00.880 --> 0:26:02.760 know what, we can work towards it, Vitor. 0:26:02.880 --> 0:26:05.159 Before we actually get started, though, there's something that we 0:26:05.200 --> 0:26:07.439 do on every episode and we ask all our guests 0:26:07.480 --> 0:26:10.440 to contribute to this very special part of what makes 0:26:10.440 --> 0:26:14.560 life life uncut now that is called accidentally unfiltered. And 0:26:14.680 --> 0:26:17.600 I would like to know what is your most embarrassing 0:26:17.600 --> 0:26:19.760 story share it with everyone so we can laugh at 0:26:19.800 --> 0:26:20.280 you together. 0:26:20.840 --> 0:26:23.960 Some of them are too embarrassing. I mean the time 0:26:24.119 --> 0:26:26.159 in you know what, this is really embarrassing because I 0:26:26.200 --> 0:26:28.760 was like, oh, tell them about so last week I'll 0:26:28.800 --> 0:26:29.280 give you two. 0:26:29.359 --> 0:26:31.480 Are you ready? Last week COVID. 0:26:31.160 --> 0:26:33.720 Normal now in Melbourne, So, like, real life meetings are 0:26:33.720 --> 0:26:36.320 happening again. And I've gotten so used to coming to 0:26:36.400 --> 0:26:39.400 work in my active wear and just looking like an 0:26:39.440 --> 0:26:43.840 absolute twit, like think top knot that's terrible, Like no bra, 0:26:44.119 --> 0:26:46.520 Like I've been wearing like singlets with like hoodies and 0:26:46.600 --> 0:26:47.439 like a pair of tights. 0:26:47.480 --> 0:26:48.160 It's been great. 0:26:48.480 --> 0:26:50.760 So the other day I came to work looking like 0:26:50.800 --> 0:26:53.720 the true me, which is Lululemon leggings, a pair of 0:26:53.760 --> 0:26:56.560 white birkenstocks, no bra, a singlet and a hoodie, so 0:26:56.560 --> 0:26:59.960 that like I was somewhat in my opinion, presentable, right, 0:27:00.480 --> 0:27:01.040 and then. 0:27:01.240 --> 0:27:03.439 Jess my assistant, at least they put pants on. 0:27:03.600 --> 0:27:04.040 Yeah. 0:27:04.080 --> 0:27:06.000 Sorry, I can't believe I did either, but it turns 0:27:06.040 --> 0:27:07.960 out I didn't want to get arrested on Colin Street 0:27:07.960 --> 0:27:10.960 in the city and something I do, like on the 0:27:11.000 --> 0:27:13.200 other side, not just podcasting, as I do run a 0:27:13.240 --> 0:27:16.119 financial advisory firm. And I came to work and Jess, 0:27:16.200 --> 0:27:18.760 my assistant, was like cool, so, like are you changing? 0:27:18.840 --> 0:27:21.040 And I was like for what And she's like, you know, 0:27:21.119 --> 0:27:23.399 at ten am, you've got a board meeting down the 0:27:23.400 --> 0:27:25.680 other end of the city. And I was like what, 0:27:25.960 --> 0:27:29.080 and she's like yeah, yeah, like for your finance practice, 0:27:29.119 --> 0:27:31.679 Like you've got to go to this, like absolutely, like 0:27:31.800 --> 0:27:34.879 really important board meeting. It's about compliance and like you know, 0:27:34.960 --> 0:27:37.520 the new Foresea rules. And I was just like, ah, 0:27:37.600 --> 0:27:41.040 so I didn't have time between the meetings that I 0:27:41.119 --> 0:27:43.080 had to even go to the shops and get a 0:27:43.160 --> 0:27:45.560 dress or something. So I was just like, you know 0:27:45.600 --> 0:27:47.960 what if they don't accept me as who I am, 0:27:48.280 --> 0:27:49.359 thought it was fine. 0:27:49.200 --> 0:27:51.439 Oh you needed some duct tape around the boobs. You 0:27:51.480 --> 0:27:53.240 can improve that bra any day of the week. 0:27:53.240 --> 0:27:53.440 Girl. 0:27:53.560 --> 0:27:54.119 It was fine. 0:27:54.200 --> 0:27:57.080 Band aids, by the way, is what's sufficed on that day. 0:27:57.320 --> 0:27:59.760 So I go to this meeting. I'd hyped myself up 0:27:59.760 --> 0:28:01.640 there to be fine and like keep some people would 0:28:01.640 --> 0:28:03.919 have zoomed in. No, it was a room full of 0:28:04.040 --> 0:28:06.919 middle aged white men in their suits and then me 0:28:07.200 --> 0:28:10.600 in my in my active wear. I'm like, it's more 0:28:10.640 --> 0:28:13.480 embarrassing because I walk in and they're like, oh my god, 0:28:13.600 --> 0:28:16.000 she's the one with the podcast, and I'm like, yeah, cool, 0:28:16.000 --> 0:28:19.400 if you guys could just pretend you didn't see this. Yeah, 0:28:19.440 --> 0:28:21.040 So that was really good. And I had to sit 0:28:21.080 --> 0:28:23.800 there not for one hour, not for two hours, but 0:28:23.840 --> 0:28:27.240 for nearly three hours of compliance training. While all of 0:28:27.240 --> 0:28:29.920 these men in suits were like, yes, this is very important. 0:28:29.960 --> 0:28:31.720 I'm like yeah, okay, Like great. 0:28:31.800 --> 0:28:33.960 Do you know what's so funny is you've just literally 0:28:33.960 --> 0:28:36.320 described Laura and I to a tea like literally, now, 0:28:36.359 --> 0:28:37.840 this is what we look like every day of the week. 0:28:37.880 --> 0:28:39.960 We look like this, to the point that yesterday I 0:28:40.000 --> 0:28:43.000 had to make a conscious effort to say to Laura, Laura, 0:28:43.040 --> 0:28:45.600 I need to remind you we have this really big 0:28:45.640 --> 0:28:48.080 presentation coming up soon. We're gonna be on a panel 0:28:48.240 --> 0:28:49.719 and she's like yeah, and I'm like, well, you need 0:28:49.760 --> 0:28:51.240 to find something to wear because all. 0:28:51.120 --> 0:28:53.960 We wear is active wear and e and trainers. I mean, 0:28:54.080 --> 0:28:55.760 I was still slightly offended by that. I was like, 0:28:55.760 --> 0:28:57.200 I do know how to dress and go out in public. 0:28:57.200 --> 0:28:57.640 It's okay. 0:28:57.680 --> 0:28:59.040 You don't have to remind me, Like I'm your child, 0:28:59.120 --> 0:29:00.920 can please go by something to wear? 0:29:01.080 --> 0:29:03.000 No, it was both of us. We both forget how 0:29:03.040 --> 0:29:04.800 the dress normally. It's ridiculous. 0:29:04.880 --> 0:29:07.240 That was embarrassing, but arguably not the worst thing to 0:29:07.280 --> 0:29:10.920 ever happen. I don't wear black right, not very often, 0:29:11.120 --> 0:29:13.880 so like black is forgiving for everything, especially when you 0:29:13.920 --> 0:29:17.520 get your period. And I was giving a presentation at 0:29:17.520 --> 0:29:21.040 a conference one time, this is probably like two years ago, 0:29:21.160 --> 0:29:24.680 on financial literacy, and I was wearing this beautiful cream 0:29:24.720 --> 0:29:27.040 skirt that I have owned for a very long time. 0:29:27.560 --> 0:29:28.680 Come off stage. 0:29:28.760 --> 0:29:31.320 I'm a walker like and I'm someone who like talks 0:29:31.360 --> 0:29:33.840 with my hands a lot. Come off stage to find 0:29:33.840 --> 0:29:37.840 that I had my period. And there's no way, there 0:29:37.960 --> 0:29:42.560 is no way that people didn't see the massive patch 0:29:42.640 --> 0:29:44.200 on the back of my cream skirt. 0:29:44.400 --> 0:29:47.320 I have my head in my jacket. I'm so mortified. 0:29:47.320 --> 0:29:47.560 For you. 0:29:47.720 --> 0:29:50.320 I'm like, oh my god, I can't listen to this. 0:29:50.520 --> 0:29:54.640 And I think it's worse because thankfully it wasn't filmed, 0:29:54.680 --> 0:29:57.520 so that was good. But nobody said anything, like not 0:29:57.640 --> 0:30:00.680 one person like came up to me said, bab do 0:30:00.680 --> 0:30:02.480 you know what, maybe you should go change your skirt 0:30:02.520 --> 0:30:04.720 because we were staying in that hotel too. 0:30:04.880 --> 0:30:07.640 Why daddy, No, It's like, hey, baby, you've just got 0:30:07.640 --> 0:30:09.600 some crumbs on your face and some period on your butt, 0:30:09.680 --> 0:30:11.200 Like you need to go check that out. I mean, 0:30:11.200 --> 0:30:13.520 there's a whole other conversation in this around why we 0:30:13.520 --> 0:30:15.680 shouldn't be embarrassed when we get our periods and why, like, 0:30:15.720 --> 0:30:17.480 you know, the stigma around it needs to change. There's 0:30:17.480 --> 0:30:20.480 a greater conversation here, but right now I'm fucking dying. Also, 0:30:20.560 --> 0:30:23.080 women have a duty to tell each other. Women have 0:30:23.160 --> 0:30:25.200 a duty to say, look, I don't know if you know, 0:30:25.280 --> 0:30:26.440 but you have bled through. 0:30:26.240 --> 0:30:29.200 Your pants exactly, And it was a beautiful silk skirt, 0:30:29.200 --> 0:30:31.240 and you know how silk flows like, so I clearly 0:30:31.320 --> 0:30:34.200 sat on it and then stood up, so it's just 0:30:34.240 --> 0:30:37.800 like beautifully flowing. Anyway, I think the worst part about 0:30:37.840 --> 0:30:40.239 it was I was staying in the same hotel. So 0:30:40.280 --> 0:30:42.080 it would have been a really easy fix for me 0:30:42.160 --> 0:30:44.680 to pop upstairs, put a new body outfit on, and 0:30:44.720 --> 0:30:49.360 come downstairs. And no, nobody had the due diligence. They 0:30:49.360 --> 0:30:51.680 didn't think of me. They don't care about me. They 0:30:51.720 --> 0:30:56.040 didn't tell me that I had bled through my skirt, okay. 0:30:55.760 --> 0:30:57.280 And yeah, that's the most embarrassing. 0:30:57.520 --> 0:30:59.160 What I love about this the most is that just 0:30:59.160 --> 0:31:01.480 before we actually sat recording, Victoria was saying that her 0:31:01.520 --> 0:31:03.200 producer was like, are you sure you want to go 0:31:03.240 --> 0:31:05.280 on Life on Cut? Like they talk about sex and 0:31:05.320 --> 0:31:08.040 they talk about they talk about other things than finance. 0:31:08.080 --> 0:31:09.720 Are you sure you want to do it a podcast 0:31:09.800 --> 0:31:10.400 episode with them? 0:31:10.560 --> 0:31:12.800 Yeah, we haven't said one thing about finance, And here 0:31:12.840 --> 0:31:14.280 you are talking about the time that you got your 0:31:14.280 --> 0:31:17.520 public period. Welcome to Life on Cut. That's Hey, this 0:31:17.600 --> 0:31:20.200 is what we This is how we roll, baby, this 0:31:20.280 --> 0:31:22.320 is just what we do best. Let's get into the 0:31:22.360 --> 0:31:23.960 finance questions and like, this is a bit of a 0:31:23.960 --> 0:31:26.200 different pivot for us, Like we have done one episode 0:31:26.240 --> 0:31:28.840 in the past, which is around sharing your finances in 0:31:28.880 --> 0:31:31.480 a relationship and the importance of talking about finances with 0:31:31.480 --> 0:31:33.680 your partner. But we wanted to do a bit more 0:31:33.720 --> 0:31:36.920 of a greater conversation around finances with Victoria because she 0:31:37.040 --> 0:31:39.400 is the expert, and also how you can apply that 0:31:39.440 --> 0:31:42.880 to your every day So let's jump on in, and 0:31:42.960 --> 0:31:44.520 I think the very first thing I want to know 0:31:44.520 --> 0:31:47.240 from your perspective, from someone who deals with questions all 0:31:47.320 --> 0:31:50.360 day long from people who write in across the podcast world, 0:31:50.880 --> 0:31:53.840 what is the number one question that you get asked 0:31:53.880 --> 0:31:56.080 day to day from millennials around finance? 0:31:56.240 --> 0:31:57.280 What is the biggest problem? 0:31:57.600 --> 0:32:00.360 So the biggest problem is how do I save? And 0:32:00.560 --> 0:32:03.240 then the second biggest problem is how do I invest? 0:32:03.680 --> 0:32:06.440 So I feel like there's obviously lots of other stuff 0:32:06.480 --> 0:32:09.040 around that, but if we really distill down the real 0:32:09.120 --> 0:32:12.160 questions they're asking, it's how do I achieve my financial goal, 0:32:12.200 --> 0:32:15.480 which to me is how do I prioritize my savings 0:32:15.760 --> 0:32:19.080 because as millennials and as young women, it is so 0:32:19.560 --> 0:32:22.240 hard in a you know, in the age of Instagram, 0:32:22.320 --> 0:32:25.200 right like watching everybody else live their best life, you 0:32:25.280 --> 0:32:27.200 kind of want to live yours as well. And at 0:32:27.240 --> 0:32:29.120 the same time, you really want to buy a house 0:32:29.240 --> 0:32:32.960 or go on these really big holidays, but unfortunately most 0:32:33.000 --> 0:32:36.800 of that requires significant you know, let's call it sacrifice 0:32:36.840 --> 0:32:39.080 to save, and it's like, well, how do I do 0:32:39.120 --> 0:32:41.760 that and still maintain my lifestyle? You know, as Britt 0:32:41.840 --> 0:32:44.280 said before, like we want to eat our avocado toast, 0:32:44.360 --> 0:32:47.840 and like, how do we maintain a brunchy lifestyle while 0:32:47.920 --> 0:32:50.200 still making sure that I'm not poor in retirement? 0:32:50.480 --> 0:32:52.080 To be honest, so do you think, like we talk 0:32:52.120 --> 0:32:54.320 a lot about comparison culture, and do you think comparison 0:32:54.360 --> 0:32:56.600 culture plays a massive part in the reason why we're 0:32:56.640 --> 0:32:59.200 not able to save? And maybe it is the smashed 0:32:59.200 --> 0:33:02.000 avocado toast that is, you know, holding us back from 0:33:02.040 --> 0:33:04.200 being able to reach those financial goals. 0:33:04.640 --> 0:33:05.000 Huge. 0:33:05.240 --> 0:33:09.000 Comparison culture, genuinely, to me, is the thief of so 0:33:09.200 --> 0:33:13.000 much joy for so many people. And it's funny because 0:33:13.320 --> 0:33:15.960 we all have different values, and we all have different 0:33:16.000 --> 0:33:20.520 mindsets and you know, beliefs around money, and we start 0:33:20.600 --> 0:33:22.800 believing that these are the things we want. Like we 0:33:22.840 --> 0:33:26.200 see our favorite Instagram influencers buying houses and renovating homes, 0:33:26.240 --> 0:33:27.680 and you go, well, that's what I want to do. 0:33:28.000 --> 0:33:30.080 And then once you get down to the crux of it, 0:33:30.160 --> 0:33:32.200 so many people like, oh yeah, like I want to 0:33:32.240 --> 0:33:34.560 do it because that's what you do and you're like okay, 0:33:34.560 --> 0:33:36.920 but like why, They're like because it's what you do, 0:33:37.240 --> 0:33:40.360 Like okay, but like why. And if you can't properly 0:33:40.400 --> 0:33:43.840 tell me why you want something, then more often than not, 0:33:43.920 --> 0:33:46.440 it's just because you're being influenced by the world that's 0:33:46.480 --> 0:33:49.920 surrounding you. And owning a home in twenty twenty one 0:33:50.200 --> 0:33:53.480 is hard, and it is a really big financial commitment. 0:33:53.520 --> 0:33:56.760 And to be honest, I'm seeing a lot of millennials 0:33:56.800 --> 0:33:59.120 nowadays who just are like, you know what, it's too hard. 0:33:59.320 --> 0:34:01.440 I'm just going to I'm going to create wealth in 0:34:01.480 --> 0:34:04.480 a different way. That's not a priority to me. It's 0:34:04.480 --> 0:34:06.840 not a financial commitment that I actually want to make, 0:34:07.160 --> 0:34:09.319 and I go more power to you, Like it is 0:34:09.400 --> 0:34:13.560 a massive financial commitment. It is something that takes significant sacrifice, 0:34:13.920 --> 0:34:16.840 and it's not as easy as it was thirty fifty 0:34:16.920 --> 0:34:19.640 years ago to acquire property. So for me, I think 0:34:19.680 --> 0:34:22.719 that comparison culture is massive and it really does play 0:34:22.760 --> 0:34:25.000 into it, whether you want to admit that it's influenced 0:34:25.000 --> 0:34:25.400 you or not. 0:34:25.760 --> 0:34:27.520 It's really interesting you say that. And this kind of 0:34:27.520 --> 0:34:29.279 brings me back to an interview that we did a 0:34:29.360 --> 0:34:31.680 really long time ago with Samantha Wills and it was 0:34:31.719 --> 0:34:36.040 around starting businesses and being an entrepreneur and something that 0:34:36.080 --> 0:34:38.879 she said, which was like, everybody feels like they need 0:34:38.920 --> 0:34:41.239 to start a small business because everybody else is doing it. 0:34:41.280 --> 0:34:43.760 Everybody feels like they have to have their own project 0:34:43.760 --> 0:34:45.799 that's their own business. And the reality is is that 0:34:46.080 --> 0:34:48.440 there's so much that goes into having your own business 0:34:48.440 --> 0:34:50.399 that isn't just having a product that you can sell 0:34:50.440 --> 0:34:52.879 an Etsy, and you've got to be really passionate about 0:34:52.920 --> 0:34:53.839 the business side of things. 0:34:53.840 --> 0:34:55.600 But because we see so many people. 0:34:55.280 --> 0:34:57.759 Doing it and seemingly doing it in a really successful 0:34:57.760 --> 0:35:00.759 way across Instagram and social media, we think we have to. 0:35:00.680 --> 0:35:01.359 Do that as well. 0:35:01.719 --> 0:35:04.360 And I really do totally align with what you've just 0:35:04.400 --> 0:35:07.719 said in regards to buying property and renovating. I have 0:35:07.800 --> 0:35:09.840 no idea how to renovate. I have no passion for 0:35:09.880 --> 0:35:12.440 renovating whatsoever. And I think things like the block is 0:35:12.440 --> 0:35:15.880 a big part of the massive But even Matt's like, 0:35:15.960 --> 0:35:17.920 maybe we just need to buy a shitty house and 0:35:17.960 --> 0:35:18.840 renovate the house. 0:35:18.920 --> 0:35:21.719 Oh good, idea, that won't end in disaster. 0:35:21.920 --> 0:35:24.920 Let's do that with two babies. It sounds fucking terrible. 0:35:25.080 --> 0:35:28.480 But the thing about wealth and wealth creation is it's 0:35:28.520 --> 0:35:31.480 so invisible, Like you can't see how much money you've 0:35:31.520 --> 0:35:33.600 got in a savings account when you buy a property, 0:35:33.680 --> 0:35:36.239 like yeah, you might get one sexy Instagram post if 0:35:36.239 --> 0:35:38.479 you're putting a sold sign up, but then the rest 0:35:38.480 --> 0:35:40.239 of it's all you being like, oh my god, I 0:35:40.320 --> 0:35:42.960 just bought this house in the kitchen dank, like cannot 0:35:43.000 --> 0:35:45.359 get rid of the flies. Like it's one of those 0:35:45.400 --> 0:35:48.080 things that you see the door bags and you don't 0:35:48.120 --> 0:35:51.719 see the associated debt that they're going into to potentially 0:35:52.120 --> 0:35:54.680 acquire those things. And you know, I'm lucky to be 0:35:54.840 --> 0:35:57.759 in the space where I do have a profile as 0:35:57.800 --> 0:36:00.880 a financial advisor, right, which means I do have a 0:36:00.920 --> 0:36:04.080 lot of social media clients, and the amount of times 0:36:04.120 --> 0:36:07.200 I speak to you know, smaller influencers who say, Victoria 0:36:07.320 --> 0:36:09.600 really need your help managing this, and I go, great, 0:36:09.680 --> 0:36:11.319 no problems, let's set it up. And I do a 0:36:11.360 --> 0:36:13.400 lot of cash flow for them and you know, talking 0:36:13.400 --> 0:36:15.840 to them about how to charge and whatever else. But 0:36:15.880 --> 0:36:18.000 the amount of times they come to me with personal 0:36:18.040 --> 0:36:21.279 debt because even the influencers have been trying to keep 0:36:21.400 --> 0:36:23.960 up with the joneses and keep up with what's going 0:36:23.960 --> 0:36:25.799 on and they're like, yep, cool. Well, you know, I 0:36:25.840 --> 0:36:28.360 get sent so many dresses and clothes. I just needed 0:36:28.360 --> 0:36:31.480 beautiful accessories so that I could really create great. 0:36:31.280 --> 0:36:31.920 Content with it. 0:36:31.960 --> 0:36:34.880 And it's like have we all lost our brains? Like 0:36:35.040 --> 0:36:37.200 is that actually what we should be doing? Like I 0:36:37.320 --> 0:36:40.640 get having a beautiful bag, and please don't get me wrong, 0:36:40.760 --> 0:36:44.000 Like I have a couple of really beautiful designer bags 0:36:44.000 --> 0:36:46.680 that I have worked my butt off for, but it's. 0:36:46.560 --> 0:36:48.920 Not something that I've purchased regularly. 0:36:48.960 --> 0:36:50.759 And you know, I have this one bag and I'm 0:36:50.760 --> 0:36:52.839 always putting it on chairs and like I won't put 0:36:52.840 --> 0:36:55.000 it on the ground, and it's like a child. 0:36:54.680 --> 0:36:58.040 To me, right, Like I worked so hard to acquire that. 0:36:58.280 --> 0:37:01.680 I bought that when I had a really big milestone, 0:37:01.719 --> 0:37:04.280 and you know what, that makes me feel good about myself. 0:37:04.520 --> 0:37:07.239 But I would feel terrible if people. 0:37:06.960 --> 0:37:09.440 On Instagram saw that and thought, oh, well, she has one, 0:37:09.480 --> 0:37:12.080 I need one, Like they don't see that that was 0:37:12.120 --> 0:37:14.440 actually a milestone thing for me, and that's, you know, 0:37:14.560 --> 0:37:16.560 something that I worked my butt off for and I 0:37:16.640 --> 0:37:19.360 waited to purchase until after I had a house and 0:37:19.400 --> 0:37:21.640 after I definitely didn't have any debt and all of 0:37:21.680 --> 0:37:24.960 those other things, And I think that wealth generation and 0:37:25.000 --> 0:37:28.080 financial security is invisible, and that's why it's so hard 0:37:28.160 --> 0:37:31.520 to prioritize in a world where Instagram is so massive, 0:37:32.000 --> 0:37:35.520 and it's just very, very hard to swallow. And I 0:37:35.560 --> 0:37:37.640 think that it's hard to see as well, because we 0:37:37.680 --> 0:37:41.319 don't understand more often than not, what is sponsored and 0:37:41.320 --> 0:37:44.239 what isn't sponsored, And you know, what influences have been 0:37:44.320 --> 0:37:47.399 gifted things and what hasn't been gifted, like what's real 0:37:47.440 --> 0:37:50.359 and what's fake. It's really hard to differentiate that at 0:37:50.360 --> 0:37:51.239 this point in time. 0:37:52.120 --> 0:37:54.360 What's it like for you working in an industry that 0:37:54.440 --> 0:37:57.720 is so predominantly male focused, finance in general, it attracts 0:37:57.719 --> 0:37:59.759 a lot of male attention. What is it like being 0:37:59.800 --> 0:38:01.160 a female in that industry? 0:38:01.280 --> 0:38:03.719 To be honest, nowadays, it's not as hard as it 0:38:03.880 --> 0:38:06.560 used to be, But when I first started, it was 0:38:06.600 --> 0:38:10.279 definitely very challenging because it meant that I had to 0:38:10.280 --> 0:38:13.279 have a level of confidence I genuinely didn't have. I'd 0:38:13.280 --> 0:38:15.080 have to walk into rooms and like a lot of 0:38:15.080 --> 0:38:18.480 what I do obviously as a financial advisor day to day, 0:38:18.520 --> 0:38:20.160 it's one on one, Like I get to talk to 0:38:20.239 --> 0:38:23.560 clients and I don't actually have that overloording feeling of 0:38:23.640 --> 0:38:27.320 you know, middle aged white men with mediocre attitudes coming 0:38:27.400 --> 0:38:29.680 over at me and you know, thinking that they're all 0:38:29.680 --> 0:38:32.279 that shit and I'm not. But it's always when I 0:38:32.320 --> 0:38:35.680 go to a conference or I go to CPD because 0:38:35.719 --> 0:38:37.400 every year I need to do a certain amount of 0:38:37.440 --> 0:38:40.200 training and education to make sure that I can still 0:38:40.800 --> 0:38:45.400 maintain my license as a financial advisor because I am legit, unfortunately, 0:38:45.719 --> 0:38:46.320 and it means. 0:38:46.200 --> 0:38:46.959 There's a lot of work. 0:38:46.960 --> 0:38:49.120 But I would go into conference rooms and they would 0:38:49.200 --> 0:38:51.719 just be full of men, and you know, it's not 0:38:51.880 --> 0:38:54.319 the worst thing to walk into a room full of men, 0:38:54.360 --> 0:38:56.040 but it's when they go where do you work, and 0:38:56.040 --> 0:38:57.360 you go, I work for myself. 0:38:57.640 --> 0:38:59.359 Oh okay, Like what do you do? 0:38:59.400 --> 0:39:01.600 And you'd be like financial advisor and they'd be like, so, 0:39:01.640 --> 0:39:03.680 who do you work with and I'd be like, no, no, no, 0:39:03.719 --> 0:39:06.280 it's me, Like this is my team, and they're like, oh, okay, 0:39:06.320 --> 0:39:08.759 so you've got a business partner. Like they could not 0:39:09.280 --> 0:39:12.680 conceptualize the idea that maybe I was just out on 0:39:12.680 --> 0:39:15.719 my own, and you know, I'd never given anybody the 0:39:15.760 --> 0:39:18.080 impression that there was somebody else in the background, but 0:39:18.120 --> 0:39:20.520 they'd always assume that there's no way she could have 0:39:20.520 --> 0:39:22.520 done it on her own. And so I think for 0:39:22.600 --> 0:39:24.640 me that was one of the hardest things to overcome 0:39:24.760 --> 0:39:27.160 is always being like, no, no, no, I am a 0:39:27.160 --> 0:39:30.560 financial advisor and I own that practice, and they're like, oh, okay, cool, 0:39:30.680 --> 0:39:31.840 Like where did that come from. 0:39:31.960 --> 0:39:33.200 I think a lot of the time this kind of 0:39:33.239 --> 0:39:37.480 thing is it's not conscious. I think it's subconsciously they think, Okay, 0:39:37.520 --> 0:39:39.680 where's the business partner, where's the man. And they wouldn't 0:39:39.680 --> 0:39:42.680 be doing that to be detrimental towards you or anything 0:39:42.680 --> 0:39:44.880 that you have built on your sense, But it's just 0:39:44.920 --> 0:39:48.480 something we all assume that one young individual on their 0:39:48.520 --> 0:39:50.879 own can't create this much success. I think we all 0:39:50.920 --> 0:39:53.000 just like to think because it makes ourselves feel better 0:39:53.040 --> 0:39:54.759 that they're surely they didn't do it on their own. 0:39:55.000 --> 0:39:57.520 And there is a whole lot of sexism that's heavily 0:39:57.520 --> 0:39:59.000 loaded into it. I mean, I don't think that we 0:39:59.000 --> 0:40:01.880 can extrapolate that entirely, Like there are industries that are 0:40:01.920 --> 0:40:05.200 heavily male dominated because their content and the study of 0:40:05.239 --> 0:40:08.319 that content is what's been traditionally thought to be for men. 0:40:08.480 --> 0:40:10.120 Like I mean, if we think about money in the 0:40:10.200 --> 0:40:13.280 history and who controls the finances in a house. Yeah, 0:40:13.400 --> 0:40:15.600 traditionally it's the men, and I think that that kind 0:40:15.600 --> 0:40:17.480 of leads me into my next question for you, but 0:40:17.560 --> 0:40:20.279 it's more around do you. 0:40:20.280 --> 0:40:22.440 Think that men and women approach money differently? 0:40:22.480 --> 0:40:24.799 Still, and talk me through sort of like how we're 0:40:24.800 --> 0:40:27.960 breaking down those stereotypes around how men and women approach money. 0:40:28.040 --> 0:40:31.480 Yeah, I do absolutely think men and women approach money differently. 0:40:31.560 --> 0:40:33.960 And it's not just me thinking that. There's research out 0:40:34.000 --> 0:40:37.000 there to say that men and women are very different 0:40:37.040 --> 0:40:39.239 when it comes to finances, and a lot of it 0:40:39.280 --> 0:40:42.200 is around our ability to take on risk, So women 0:40:42.280 --> 0:40:45.520 are much less likely to take risk than men. But 0:40:45.680 --> 0:40:48.480 also women want all the facts before we make a decision, 0:40:48.760 --> 0:40:51.600 so we are more than likely to feel as though 0:40:51.600 --> 0:40:54.480 we're uneducated on a topic when we know fifty percent 0:40:54.640 --> 0:40:58.000 of the information, whereas men they know fifty percent. They're like, great, 0:40:58.120 --> 0:41:02.279 I can take a decision rail road ahead, right like, 0:41:02.320 --> 0:41:04.359 whereas you and I might go okay, cool, Like I 0:41:04.400 --> 0:41:06.080 know I need to do X, Y and Z, but 0:41:06.120 --> 0:41:07.880 I just don't know once I've done that, what the 0:41:07.920 --> 0:41:09.680 next step is. So I'm not really going to take 0:41:09.680 --> 0:41:11.720 the first step because I don't know what the second 0:41:11.760 --> 0:41:15.120 step looks like. So women are a lot more conservative 0:41:15.160 --> 0:41:18.719 when it comes to money and saving, but I think 0:41:18.760 --> 0:41:22.920 that that's not a bad thing. But historically speaking, if 0:41:22.920 --> 0:41:25.200 we look at you know, social media, we look at 0:41:25.280 --> 0:41:28.400 you know, product providers, we look at banks, they've never 0:41:28.520 --> 0:41:31.120 really spoken to women. And the fact that we do 0:41:31.200 --> 0:41:33.319 want all of the information upfront, and we do want 0:41:33.360 --> 0:41:35.520 to be educated, and we do actually want to feel 0:41:35.560 --> 0:41:39.080 empowered by these decisions before we actually make them. And 0:41:39.160 --> 0:41:41.359 I think that that's something that I'm really trying to 0:41:41.440 --> 0:41:43.520 do in Cheese on the Money, and that's give you 0:41:43.560 --> 0:41:46.640 the education that you genuinely feel you need to make 0:41:46.960 --> 0:41:50.600 good financial decisions. Because so many people talk to me 0:41:50.680 --> 0:41:54.080 every day about okay, Victoria, like I'm not confident about XYZX, 0:41:54.200 --> 0:41:56.480 no problems. I'll educate you, then you can make the 0:41:56.560 --> 0:41:59.279 decision for yourself, because a lot of people think that 0:41:59.280 --> 0:42:01.839 as a financial advisor, my job is to just tell 0:42:01.880 --> 0:42:04.399 you what the answer is. And it's kind of like, well, 0:42:04.600 --> 0:42:07.960 how am I going to instill long term financial success 0:42:08.040 --> 0:42:10.879 in people if I don't teach them the things they 0:42:10.920 --> 0:42:11.480 need to know? 0:42:11.800 --> 0:42:13.680 And see, I'm one of those people. I'm super guilty. 0:42:13.719 --> 0:42:15.479 I'm the one that goes to them and I'm like, hey, 0:42:15.680 --> 0:42:17.200 this is what i've got. Can you turn into this, 0:42:17.280 --> 0:42:19.479 tell me what to invest in? Don't ask Like they'll 0:42:19.520 --> 0:42:21.200 often write to me and they'll say, hey, I need 0:42:21.239 --> 0:42:22.880 you to say yes or no to this, and I'm like, no, 0:42:22.920 --> 0:42:24.399 that's why I'm paying you. I was like, I don't 0:42:24.440 --> 0:42:27.400 make these decisions. Like my brother's a financial advisor and 0:42:27.480 --> 0:42:30.720 I'm always going to him for like under the book advice, 0:42:30.800 --> 0:42:31.640 you know, just family. 0:42:31.800 --> 0:42:32.839 Yeah, good, good good. 0:42:32.840 --> 0:42:33.600 But he's also like. 0:42:33.560 --> 0:42:35.520 Britt, I don't want to invest any of your money 0:42:35.560 --> 0:42:38.200 because if I lose it, you're gonna hold that against me. 0:42:38.200 --> 0:42:40.080 And he's like, whilst I don't think I will lose it, 0:42:40.640 --> 0:42:42.319 I'm just going to give you the tools you need. 0:42:42.360 --> 0:42:43.600 And I'm like that's not good enough. 0:42:43.640 --> 0:42:46.960 Tell me, yes, that's not what I wanted. I'm like 0:42:47.040 --> 0:42:49.560 that as well. I want the answers, so I totally 0:42:49.600 --> 0:42:51.640 get it. And to be honest, when I've got clients, 0:42:51.680 --> 0:42:54.840 that's easy, like I can make those decisions. But she's 0:42:54.880 --> 0:42:57.720 on the money. It's not necessarily about you know, taking 0:42:57.760 --> 0:43:00.440 on new clients. It's always about teaching you how fish 0:43:00.480 --> 0:43:04.239 instead of giving you the fish, whereas financial advice. You know, 0:43:04.280 --> 0:43:06.600 if you went and said, look, I actually want advice, 0:43:06.640 --> 0:43:10.320 I want a financial advisor, they should be actually just going. 0:43:10.160 --> 0:43:12.319 Okay, brit what are your goals? How does that work? 0:43:12.400 --> 0:43:15.000 Okay, here's what we are going to do. Are you 0:43:15.120 --> 0:43:17.440 comfortable with that? And then they can manage it. So 0:43:17.520 --> 0:43:21.080 there's to me, a really big difference between financial advice 0:43:21.160 --> 0:43:25.000 and financial literacy, and in this world we don't actually 0:43:25.040 --> 0:43:28.480 talk about that difference. Everybody thinks that they need financial 0:43:28.520 --> 0:43:30.759 advice when they actually just need to learn how to 0:43:30.760 --> 0:43:33.919 do a budget. And a financial advisor can't teach you 0:43:34.000 --> 0:43:37.560 how to spend less, and I mean predominantly we could. 0:43:37.800 --> 0:43:39.320 I could sit you down and be like, okay, brit 0:43:39.360 --> 0:43:41.520 you are spending too much on those to your bags. 0:43:42.000 --> 0:43:45.279 But I think that we also need to remember that 0:43:45.280 --> 0:43:49.000 that's actually entirely within your control. You're right, But once 0:43:49.000 --> 0:43:51.759 you've got all of those savings, I would help you 0:43:51.840 --> 0:43:54.239 make that decision as a financial advisor on how to 0:43:54.280 --> 0:43:57.279 invest it to create wealth. And so many times people 0:43:57.360 --> 0:43:59.840 come to me like try and need a financial advisor. 0:44:00.000 --> 0:44:01.840 I'm like, no, no, no, let's talk what do you 0:44:01.880 --> 0:44:05.440 actually need? Like, what's the solution here. Oh well, actually 0:44:05.480 --> 0:44:08.200 I just have you know, a small amount of personal debt, 0:44:08.360 --> 0:44:10.759 not good at saving. It's like you don't need that. 0:44:10.840 --> 0:44:13.120 You actually need someone to sit you down and just 0:44:13.200 --> 0:44:15.840 do a budget. And that might be a financial counselor 0:44:15.840 --> 0:44:17.640 it might be a money coach, or it might be 0:44:17.760 --> 0:44:19.960 just you know. I've started an online course for this, 0:44:20.120 --> 0:44:22.360 like so that you can go and teach yourself, and 0:44:22.440 --> 0:44:25.040 I think that that's really powerful in itself, knowing that 0:44:25.040 --> 0:44:29.120 there's a difference between literacy and then advice, because advice 0:44:29.280 --> 0:44:32.880 is you actually paying me for advice, whereas literacy is 0:44:32.920 --> 0:44:35.840 me teaching you the skills that you need at a baseline. 0:44:36.400 --> 0:44:39.200 So we obviously have I mean, we have male listeners, 0:44:39.200 --> 0:44:41.000 but we would be lying if we didn't say we 0:44:41.000 --> 0:44:43.040 were predominantly a female podcast. You know, I think like 0:44:43.120 --> 0:44:45.320 ninety five percent of our listeners are female. 0:44:45.480 --> 0:44:45.640 Yeah. 0:44:45.640 --> 0:44:46.200 Absolutely. 0:44:46.360 --> 0:44:48.480 Why do you think it's so important that as women 0:44:48.640 --> 0:44:52.239 we start taking real control over our financial decisions, over 0:44:52.280 --> 0:44:54.719 our choices, and also over the information that we. 0:44:54.680 --> 0:44:58.040 Know, Because Laura, we're already behind. There's already the pay gap, 0:44:58.080 --> 0:45:00.799 and unfortunately that's going to take another hundred years at 0:45:00.800 --> 0:45:03.080 the rate that we're going to make that any closer. 0:45:03.120 --> 0:45:03.480 Together. 0:45:03.719 --> 0:45:06.520 We also outlive men, so we're gonna live longer. So 0:45:06.600 --> 0:45:09.040 regardless of whether a man is a financial plan for 0:45:09.120 --> 0:45:11.560 you right now, they're probably gonna die before you. And 0:45:11.600 --> 0:45:14.600 at some point, if I'm being really morbid, you're gonna 0:45:14.640 --> 0:45:17.200 have to manage the finances on your own. This is 0:45:17.320 --> 0:45:19.760 just a fact of life. And I'm quite blunt about 0:45:19.760 --> 0:45:22.560 these things because it's just like, Okay, I know that 0:45:22.680 --> 0:45:24.880 you know your partner might be really wealthy, or you 0:45:24.960 --> 0:45:27.920 plan to marry well or whatever it is, but like 0:45:27.960 --> 0:45:30.920 that doesn't allow you the financial freedom that you deserve. 0:45:31.280 --> 0:45:33.840 And when I say financial freedom, we're not talking about 0:45:33.880 --> 0:45:38.040 being absolutely loaded. We are talking about having the ability 0:45:38.080 --> 0:45:41.960 of choice, and that is something that not everybody is afforded, right, So, 0:45:42.080 --> 0:45:44.960 like too many times do we hear stories of domestic 0:45:45.080 --> 0:45:48.239 violence or you know, someone's partner cheating on somebody else 0:45:48.280 --> 0:45:51.239 and then wanting to leave a situation, but money is 0:45:51.280 --> 0:45:54.120 the reason they are unable to. If you are putting 0:45:54.160 --> 0:45:57.359 yourself in a position where you are financially literate and 0:45:57.400 --> 0:45:59.359 you know how to save, you know you've got your 0:45:59.400 --> 0:46:02.760 own little little get out of jail free card fund 0:46:03.000 --> 0:46:06.480 and you're actually financially literate, nothing is going to be 0:46:06.520 --> 0:46:09.279 able to beat you down in a way. But I 0:46:09.320 --> 0:46:12.760 see too many women who are in their early forties, 0:46:12.800 --> 0:46:14.960 like late thirties, early forties, who are going through a 0:46:14.960 --> 0:46:18.760 divorce and I literally sit down with them and I go, hey, great, 0:46:18.920 --> 0:46:21.239 like this is going on. I obviously can't change that, 0:46:21.360 --> 0:46:24.000 but they say they need me because you know, they 0:46:24.000 --> 0:46:26.719 need the financial education and they don't even know how 0:46:26.719 --> 0:46:29.680 to log into their banking apps. And I just think, great, 0:46:29.719 --> 0:46:32.279 if you're in a fantastic partnership and it's not your 0:46:32.400 --> 0:46:35.479 job in the relationship to manage money, that's actually fine. 0:46:35.520 --> 0:46:37.840 I'm not asking you to always be on top of 0:46:37.880 --> 0:46:40.919 it and you know, not divvy up jobs in a relationship, 0:46:40.920 --> 0:46:42.520 but I want you to be able to do those 0:46:42.560 --> 0:46:44.800 things so if push comes to shove, you can stand 0:46:44.840 --> 0:46:46.000 on your own two feet. 0:46:46.200 --> 0:46:46.399 Yeah. 0:46:46.440 --> 0:46:48.239 We have spoken about this loads, and that was actually 0:46:48.280 --> 0:46:49.640 one of the things that we touched on when we 0:46:49.680 --> 0:46:52.960 did our finance episode a while back. And it's so important, 0:46:53.000 --> 0:46:55.560 like even if you do have a joint income and 0:46:55.840 --> 0:46:59.320 you share everything as a couple, like I really advocate 0:46:59.360 --> 0:47:01.680 for how important it is to keep some savings that 0:47:01.719 --> 0:47:04.439 are your own savings, and it's just yes, maybe it's 0:47:04.440 --> 0:47:06.919 so you can treat yourself, but it's also in case 0:47:06.960 --> 0:47:08.880 of a rainy day or in case something does happen 0:47:08.880 --> 0:47:11.840 and you need to leave or extract yourself for whatever reason. 0:47:12.280 --> 0:47:14.160 And I know that that's worst case snow and it 0:47:14.200 --> 0:47:16.399 seems a bit morbid, but I think as women, it's 0:47:16.400 --> 0:47:18.520 something that we need to be really conscious of. And 0:47:18.840 --> 0:47:21.600 putting all of your money and all of your finances 0:47:21.600 --> 0:47:24.080 and all of your savings together doesn't give you that 0:47:24.160 --> 0:47:26.880 flexibility if you need to leave exactly. 0:47:26.920 --> 0:47:30.560 And it's not just this relationship piece either, right like 0:47:31.040 --> 0:47:33.800 having your own and you know, to be a bit vulgar, 0:47:33.840 --> 0:47:36.600 it's called an f off fund, so that you can. 0:47:36.480 --> 0:47:38.080 Tell anything to f off. 0:47:38.160 --> 0:47:38.799 Sorry what was that? 0:47:39.040 --> 0:47:41.719 Yeah, look that's what it's called, right like, And that's 0:47:41.760 --> 0:47:43.839 what I talk to my clients about because it feels 0:47:43.880 --> 0:47:47.160 a little bit more empowering. So you can tell any job, 0:47:47.520 --> 0:47:50.759 any person, any situation to leave if you want to. 0:47:50.880 --> 0:47:54.239 It's not just about relationships, right it's actually you're having 0:47:54.239 --> 0:47:56.839 a really terrible time at work. You really don't want 0:47:56.880 --> 0:47:59.120 to be in that job. It's impacting your mental health 0:47:59.239 --> 0:48:01.680 so significant, you're like, you know what, I just want 0:48:01.760 --> 0:48:03.600 to throw the towel in. I know I've got ten 0:48:03.640 --> 0:48:06.279 grand saved that'll cover my costs until I find a 0:48:06.320 --> 0:48:09.640 new job. Like for so many people, just having that 0:48:09.719 --> 0:48:14.160 financial freedom to say no to any situation is so empowering. 0:48:14.600 --> 0:48:17.160 And knowing that you've got access to money should you 0:48:17.239 --> 0:48:19.720 ever need it puts you in a position where you're 0:48:19.760 --> 0:48:22.719 just more confident as a person, and I think that 0:48:22.719 --> 0:48:23.920 that is something we all deserve. 0:48:24.160 --> 0:48:26.880 Whilst we're on this topic about relationships and money and 0:48:26.960 --> 0:48:31.800 having different accounts, what do you think about how quickly 0:48:31.880 --> 0:48:34.319 in a relationship you should start to share money. Now 0:48:34.320 --> 0:48:36.920 we've just discussed the fact that you should always keep 0:48:37.000 --> 0:48:39.360 a little fuck off account for yourself always, and a 0:48:39.480 --> 0:48:42.160 very big advocate for that, but I also do believe 0:48:42.280 --> 0:48:45.279 in and this is just me. Everyone's different, but I 0:48:45.320 --> 0:48:48.760 believe in a relationship you should be also pulling money 0:48:48.800 --> 0:48:50.760 for certain things that you're going to pay for together, 0:48:50.800 --> 0:48:52.799 whether that is your rent, whether it is like maybe 0:48:52.840 --> 0:48:54.400 it's a fun account that you want to go and 0:48:54.400 --> 0:48:55.719 do things on the weekend, or. 0:48:55.960 --> 0:48:56.680 Whatever it is. 0:48:57.280 --> 0:49:00.680 How quickly in a relationship do you think people should 0:49:00.719 --> 0:49:02.279 start to share their money. Do they wait till they 0:49:02.320 --> 0:49:04.680 live together, do they wait for a certain time period. 0:49:05.200 --> 0:49:08.840 So interesting question, and my response to that is personal 0:49:08.880 --> 0:49:12.160 finance is just that it's personal and there's no right, 0:49:12.239 --> 0:49:14.840 there's no wrong. So I personally, I talk about this 0:49:14.880 --> 0:49:16.799 all the time on my podcast. I share all of 0:49:16.840 --> 0:49:20.040 my money with my partner because we are together working 0:49:20.080 --> 0:49:22.880 towards some pretty big goals. I'm grateful that, you know, 0:49:23.000 --> 0:49:25.680 recently I've been able to purchase our first home together, 0:49:25.960 --> 0:49:28.440 and it kind of just makes sense for our situation. 0:49:28.600 --> 0:49:30.440 I mean, we don't have kids yet, but I have 0:49:30.520 --> 0:49:33.440 three for children, and we look after those, and it's 0:49:33.560 --> 0:49:38.239 just very much us situation. Whereas I've got clients who 0:49:38.520 --> 0:49:41.480 are in their forties who still don't share with their husbands. 0:49:41.520 --> 0:49:43.839 They just you know, allocated out and they might have 0:49:43.840 --> 0:49:47.239 one joint account that they put shared resources into. It's 0:49:47.320 --> 0:49:50.400 actually fine however you want to manage it. There's no 0:49:50.480 --> 0:49:53.000 right or wrong. Like I put all my money together. 0:49:53.120 --> 0:49:56.080 Some people wouldn't want to do that. Some people go, oh, 0:49:56.320 --> 0:49:57.560 never do that, And to. 0:49:57.520 --> 0:49:58.600 Be honest, it's fine. 0:49:58.880 --> 0:50:00.960 The thing that I want to to be clear though, 0:50:01.239 --> 0:50:05.080 is communication about money. So talking about it and finding 0:50:05.080 --> 0:50:07.800 a solution that works for you too. So, like Laura, 0:50:07.920 --> 0:50:10.280 you guys might share money in a way that's different 0:50:10.320 --> 0:50:12.360 to the way you know, Steve and I share money, 0:50:12.560 --> 0:50:14.160 but that doesn't mean it's wrong. 0:50:14.400 --> 0:50:15.560 We just need to find a. 0:50:15.520 --> 0:50:18.680 Solution that fits us that we both feel really comfortable with. 0:50:19.040 --> 0:50:22.520 Because for some couples, they're like, look, I'm happy sharing money, 0:50:22.520 --> 0:50:24.399 but I just, you know, sometimes want to go out 0:50:24.400 --> 0:50:26.560 and splurge on some new shoes, and I don't want 0:50:26.719 --> 0:50:29.600 to feel like that's coming out of shared accounts. You go, okay, 0:50:29.640 --> 0:50:32.600 no problems, whereas other couples they're like, oh, I don't 0:50:32.600 --> 0:50:33.920 want my partner seeing. 0:50:33.680 --> 0:50:35.040 Any of my expenses. 0:50:35.440 --> 0:50:37.920 So I think it's just more about what is going 0:50:38.000 --> 0:50:41.200 to work for your personal relationship and how are you 0:50:41.320 --> 0:50:45.279 going to both contribute financially so it's equal. And I 0:50:45.280 --> 0:50:48.080 guess that then leads into another topic which has come 0:50:48.160 --> 0:50:54.600 up recently, and that should couples share finances or expenses 0:50:54.960 --> 0:50:57.960 exactly fifty to fifty when they don't earn the same amount? 0:50:58.280 --> 0:51:00.840 And I find that really interesting and I wanted to 0:51:00.840 --> 0:51:03.720 bring it up because you know, your demographic is ninety 0:51:03.760 --> 0:51:07.160 five percent women, so it's really really important to understand. 0:51:07.520 --> 0:51:11.000 But for me, no, fifty to fifty isn't enough. It 0:51:11.120 --> 0:51:13.359 is not good enough. If your partner owns double what 0:51:13.400 --> 0:51:17.000 you do. I think a more fair percentage split, not 0:51:17.200 --> 0:51:19.680 just okay, well, rents one thousand dollars, so we pay 0:51:19.680 --> 0:51:21.960 five hundred dollars each. But what if you only earn 0:51:22.040 --> 0:51:24.719 five hundred dollars a month? Now what your partner gets 0:51:24.719 --> 0:51:27.840 all this additional financial freedom that you're not afforded. I 0:51:27.840 --> 0:51:30.120 think it's more fair to split it in a way 0:51:30.200 --> 0:51:33.200 that goes all right, Well, I earn thirty percent less, 0:51:33.239 --> 0:51:35.560 So how about I pay thirty percent rent and you 0:51:35.600 --> 0:51:38.440 pay the seventy percent Because that's how it's going to 0:51:38.480 --> 0:51:41.400 be fair, and we both get a level of financial 0:51:41.520 --> 0:51:44.920 autonomy that makes us feel comfortable. So for me, I'm sorry, 0:51:44.960 --> 0:51:47.680 I can't come to one specific this is the answer. 0:51:47.960 --> 0:51:50.839 It's about communication and finding what works for you and 0:51:50.880 --> 0:51:51.879 your relationship. 0:51:52.320 --> 0:51:54.239 I'm actually so glad you brought that up, because it's 0:51:54.239 --> 0:51:56.120 something we have touched on in the past a little bit, 0:51:56.160 --> 0:51:58.719 and for me, that was a huge part of one 0:51:58.760 --> 0:52:00.239 of the breakdowns of my relationship. 0:52:00.480 --> 0:52:02.080 I was dating a guy and I've been with him 0:52:02.080 --> 0:52:04.040 for almost four years. 0:52:04.160 --> 0:52:06.319 Or three years or something, and he was on a 0:52:06.440 --> 0:52:08.480 fucking good wage like he earned. 0:52:08.520 --> 0:52:10.880 He owned a company and he made bank. 0:52:11.040 --> 0:52:13.600 He made bank, and he loved to tell me how 0:52:13.640 --> 0:52:15.440 much money he was making. Yet we still had to 0:52:15.440 --> 0:52:17.520 pay for everything fifty to fifty split down the dollar, 0:52:17.600 --> 0:52:20.640 and I was struggling, and the resentment built up because 0:52:20.680 --> 0:52:22.400 I was like, why am I going to work and 0:52:22.480 --> 0:52:25.400 eating cans of tuna and fucking saladas And this guy 0:52:25.719 --> 0:52:28.840 has all this savings and we're paying rent that's exorbitant, 0:52:28.840 --> 0:52:30.600 it's above my means because he wants to live in 0:52:30.600 --> 0:52:33.319 a house that I can't afford, and I am constantly 0:52:33.719 --> 0:52:35.600 feeling stressed by this. He wants to go out and 0:52:35.600 --> 0:52:37.320 eat nice stinners, but then he also wants me to 0:52:37.320 --> 0:52:38.680 pay for them from time to time, and I'm like, 0:52:38.960 --> 0:52:41.319 I get that you want things to be fair in 0:52:41.360 --> 0:52:42.040 a relationship. 0:52:42.040 --> 0:52:44.000 That's so important, and we always advocate for that. 0:52:44.080 --> 0:52:46.680 But fair doesn't, like you said, it's not a fifty 0:52:46.680 --> 0:52:49.280 to fifty split when it comes to dollars and cents. 0:52:49.600 --> 0:52:52.480 My partner, Jordan, he plays tennis. Now, he obviously owns 0:52:52.480 --> 0:52:54.440 more money than me, but he also has a very 0:52:54.520 --> 0:52:58.640 healthy appetite and he wants to eat really good, nice 0:52:58.719 --> 0:53:01.040 food and a lot of it, and I'm all for that, Like. 0:53:01.280 --> 0:53:04.520 Mate, you're paying for that. I'm not paying for your organic. 0:53:04.640 --> 0:53:06.160 No. But we started to go out a lot, right 0:53:06.200 --> 0:53:07.640 like we're eating because you know, we're in the early 0:53:07.680 --> 0:53:09.360 few months of a relationship too. You want to be 0:53:09.480 --> 0:53:11.200 together all the time. And I'd be like, cool, let's 0:53:11.200 --> 0:53:12.839 go down here and get a pasta and he'd be like, oh, 0:53:12.880 --> 0:53:14.600 I really want to go here, which was always like 0:53:15.160 --> 0:53:18.440 sashimi and Japanese and and I love this food. And 0:53:18.480 --> 0:53:20.759 we're doing it for a little while, and it got 0:53:20.800 --> 0:53:23.719 to the point where I said, look, I love this 0:53:23.800 --> 0:53:25.760 food and I love going out with you all the time. 0:53:25.840 --> 0:53:28.000 But just so you know, I can't do this anymore 0:53:28.160 --> 0:53:30.960 because I very much want to pay my way in relationships. 0:53:30.960 --> 0:53:32.839 So I will always be like you got yesterday, I'll 0:53:32.840 --> 0:53:35.080 get today, even if deep down I'm like handing over 0:53:35.120 --> 0:53:37.279 my card and I'm like ouch, yeah, I still want 0:53:37.320 --> 0:53:39.200 to make sure there's this level of fairness. And I 0:53:39.239 --> 0:53:40.759 was just really honest with him, and I was like, 0:53:41.000 --> 0:53:42.719 you know, it's all about communication. I was like, this 0:53:42.760 --> 0:53:44.680 is great. I can't do this anymore, So we need 0:53:44.719 --> 0:53:46.160 to find a way around it. What if I cook 0:53:46.200 --> 0:53:49.000 you this at home? And he was really open. He's like, 0:53:49.040 --> 0:53:50.759 this is what makes me happy, and I really like 0:53:50.800 --> 0:53:52.600 to eat this, so let's continue and I'll just pay. 0:53:52.719 --> 0:53:53.960 Yeah. Great, and that was it. 0:53:54.000 --> 0:53:57.040 We both had the conversation and I kept eating really well. 0:53:57.400 --> 0:54:00.600 Money is such a conversation where resentment star to build. 0:54:00.600 --> 0:54:02.239 I mean from the research that I've done and just 0:54:02.280 --> 0:54:05.040 from an article I was reading the other day, infidelity 0:54:05.080 --> 0:54:07.120 is number one, but finance is a number two. 0:54:07.400 --> 0:54:07.680 Yes. 0:54:07.880 --> 0:54:10.120 I think the big thing with finances, though, as a 0:54:10.360 --> 0:54:13.319 pinch point in relationships, is that it doesn't really rear 0:54:13.360 --> 0:54:14.800 its ugly head until you're. 0:54:14.719 --> 0:54:16.120 Very invested with that person. 0:54:16.400 --> 0:54:17.960 I think from the start you can tell if someone's 0:54:18.000 --> 0:54:20.000 like a bit of a cheapskate, But until you're in 0:54:20.040 --> 0:54:23.319 a committed relationship where you're starting to fully share your 0:54:23.360 --> 0:54:26.400 life with them, that's when finance becomes a really fucking 0:54:26.440 --> 0:54:28.359 big problem. And that's why you have to have these 0:54:28.360 --> 0:54:30.440 conversations early to make sure that you are on the 0:54:30.440 --> 0:54:33.080 same page and that you do have the same outlook, 0:54:33.080 --> 0:54:36.040 that you have the same ideas and mentality when it 0:54:36.040 --> 0:54:38.759 comes to money, because otherwise you're in a relationship for 0:54:38.800 --> 0:54:40.520 two years and then you're like, yeah, you know what, 0:54:40.560 --> 0:54:42.239 I resent my partner because he's a tired us. He 0:54:42.280 --> 0:54:44.279 doesn't pay for anything or he makes me pay for 0:54:44.520 --> 0:54:46.640 fifty percent, and I'm just not happy with this situation. 0:54:46.840 --> 0:54:49.200 So yeah, that's why we really were looking forward to 0:54:49.200 --> 0:54:51.759 getting you on and doing this episode because as much 0:54:51.800 --> 0:54:54.400 as we talk about relationships a lot on this podcast, 0:54:55.080 --> 0:54:58.560 this is such an important part. It's an unsexy part, 0:54:58.600 --> 0:55:01.160 but it's a really important part of relationships as well. 0:55:01.400 --> 0:55:04.000 It builds a bond as well. Like, I think if 0:55:04.040 --> 0:55:06.200 you can be open about these things, you're going to 0:55:06.280 --> 0:55:09.120 have a deeper relationship. And gin know what, I'm so 0:55:09.239 --> 0:55:13.080 happy for literally everybody to blame me for these conversations 0:55:13.120 --> 0:55:16.200 as well. I know they're really hard to start, right, 0:55:16.360 --> 0:55:18.080 Like you can't just be like, oh, so we've been 0:55:18.239 --> 0:55:20.799 together three years and not really spoken about money and 0:55:20.840 --> 0:55:22.640 I really want to, like, it can be hard to 0:55:22.680 --> 0:55:24.640 bring up blame me be like, so I listened to 0:55:24.719 --> 0:55:28.280 this podcast with Victoria, Like, what a nightmare. She told 0:55:28.320 --> 0:55:31.320 me that she said, give me more money. Yeah, she 0:55:31.560 --> 0:55:33.359 said that we had to do that. What are your 0:55:33.400 --> 0:55:35.560 thoughts on this? And I think that you know, I 0:55:35.600 --> 0:55:40.000 hope that some people from this content start conversations that 0:55:40.280 --> 0:55:43.000 actually really impact this And I think it's really important 0:55:43.360 --> 0:55:46.560 for us to even just give permission to our communities 0:55:46.640 --> 0:55:50.719 that fair does not equal equal right, like fifty to 0:55:50.760 --> 0:55:53.880 fifty doesn't always mean that things are fair. And I 0:55:53.920 --> 0:55:57.640 think that having those conversations it doesn't make you less than. 0:55:57.920 --> 0:56:01.640 It doesn't make you someone who's contributing less. It just 0:56:01.800 --> 0:56:04.200 means that you want what they've got, like you just 0:56:04.239 --> 0:56:06.799 want to be afforded the same opportunities. And if we 0:56:06.840 --> 0:56:09.680 don't speak up, we end up in situations where we 0:56:09.760 --> 0:56:12.760 are spending too much, and we are in your situation, Laura, 0:56:12.760 --> 0:56:15.799 where you're spending every single dollar to keep up with 0:56:15.880 --> 0:56:18.160 their lifestyle and they're really happy with it because they're 0:56:18.200 --> 0:56:21.279 paying less than what they probably should. But you end 0:56:21.360 --> 0:56:24.840 up having this built up level of resentment that genuinely 0:56:24.880 --> 0:56:28.399 shouldn't exist, because if you're in a proper partnership, your 0:56:28.440 --> 0:56:31.680 partner would always want you to feel comfortable and happy 0:56:31.840 --> 0:56:35.360 and safe. And if they can't afford you that grace 0:56:35.440 --> 0:56:38.000 and they can't afford that conversation with you, I think 0:56:38.040 --> 0:56:40.480 you need to have a deeper conversation with yourself. 0:56:40.640 --> 0:56:42.720 But just bring this back a little bit to something 0:56:42.719 --> 0:56:44.120 that we're talking about the start, and then we kind 0:56:44.120 --> 0:56:47.080 of got sidetracked by talking about relationships and that's around. 0:56:46.960 --> 0:56:47.760 What my period. 0:56:49.120 --> 0:56:51.279 Ah No, we don't need to revisit that hard your 0:56:51.440 --> 0:56:52.439 cycle being babe? 0:56:52.480 --> 0:56:53.120 Where you at? 0:56:53.920 --> 0:56:56.280 Okay, it's been pretty good? Yeah? 0:56:56.480 --> 0:56:58.480 No, I want to know about savings. So I think 0:56:58.480 --> 0:57:00.279 like one of the big hurdles that we have is 0:57:00.360 --> 0:57:02.160 our ability to be able to save, you know, to 0:57:02.200 --> 0:57:04.360 actually feel empowered and to look at our bank accounts 0:57:04.360 --> 0:57:06.520 and be like yeah, fuck yeah, I actually look, there's 0:57:06.520 --> 0:57:08.800 some dollars in there. Again, what do you recommend people 0:57:08.840 --> 0:57:12.200 do in order to really start to transform their savings? 0:57:12.280 --> 0:57:16.480 Okay, So there's this really sexy concept called a budget. 0:57:16.200 --> 0:57:19.440 Right, Yes, can you talk to me dirty about budgets? 0:57:20.200 --> 0:57:22.280 Finances? Do it as sexy voys? 0:57:22.320 --> 0:57:22.840 Are you ready? 0:57:22.880 --> 0:57:23.040 Bad? 0:57:23.640 --> 0:57:27.160 So what we're going to do is talk about budgets. 0:57:27.320 --> 0:57:29.400 But I think the most important thing to understand about 0:57:29.400 --> 0:57:31.320 a budget is it's not what you expect it to be. 0:57:31.440 --> 0:57:33.440 It's not what everybody else has been telling you. It 0:57:33.520 --> 0:57:36.760 is like, a budget is not about you being restricted 0:57:36.880 --> 0:57:39.600 or judged for your spending. To me, a budget is 0:57:39.640 --> 0:57:42.480 a tool that tells you what's coming into your account 0:57:42.520 --> 0:57:44.840 and what's leaving your account, and then what you need 0:57:44.920 --> 0:57:47.160 to do with your budget is work out does that 0:57:47.240 --> 0:57:50.120 align with my values? Like, am I actually spending in 0:57:50.120 --> 0:57:52.360 line with the things I want to achieve? It's not 0:57:52.400 --> 0:57:54.400 about looking at it going oh my gosh, I taped 0:57:54.400 --> 0:57:56.840 my card every single morning at Starbucks and spend like 0:57:56.880 --> 0:58:00.720 thirteen dollars. That's ridiculous. It's more about going, wow, I 0:58:00.760 --> 0:58:03.560 spend a lot on coffee. Am I getting the amount 0:58:03.560 --> 0:58:06.400 of joy out of that purchase as I should be 0:58:06.560 --> 0:58:08.640 given how much it is every single day? 0:58:08.880 --> 0:58:10.520 And if you say yes, fantastic. 0:58:10.600 --> 0:58:13.200 I'm not the financial advisor that's gonna argue with you 0:58:13.280 --> 0:58:16.440 over your coffee spending, because lord knows, that's one of 0:58:16.480 --> 0:58:18.680 the things that sparks joy in my life. And I 0:58:18.720 --> 0:58:22.000 would literally fight someone if they said you can't have 0:58:22.040 --> 0:58:23.880 coffee in the morning. So I'd be like, sorry, what, 0:58:24.840 --> 0:58:25.720 that's not happening. 0:58:25.880 --> 0:58:27.240 I'd rather not eat breakfast. 0:58:27.800 --> 0:58:29.200 Yeah, it'd actually rather starve. 0:58:29.520 --> 0:58:32.200 So for me, I think it's about your lifestyle and 0:58:32.240 --> 0:58:34.840 your goals and what you're trying to achieve, and if 0:58:34.880 --> 0:58:37.200 you go, Yeah, Actually, I go to the cafe in 0:58:37.240 --> 0:58:38.800 the morning with my team and I just buy a 0:58:38.800 --> 0:58:41.240 coffee because they're buying coffees like I don't actually care 0:58:41.280 --> 0:58:44.480 about it. In that case, probably do cut back because 0:58:44.480 --> 0:58:48.000 that's unnecessary spending that isn't actually adding to your life. 0:58:48.320 --> 0:58:52.000 Whereas I personally, my partner and I, that's one time 0:58:52.040 --> 0:58:54.080 that we actually get to spend together because both of 0:58:54.160 --> 0:58:56.840 us work hectic late nights, so we go to the 0:58:56.880 --> 0:58:59.520 cafe every single morning. We walk the dog down there 0:58:59.680 --> 0:59:02.800 and grab a coffee, walk back, and that's our time. 0:59:03.000 --> 0:59:04.720 If you told me that you were going to take 0:59:04.720 --> 0:59:06.320 that off me, I'd be like, wow, that's one of 0:59:06.320 --> 0:59:09.960 the things I actually really love doing. So everybody's values 0:59:09.960 --> 0:59:13.240 are different, everybody's spending is different, which is why I 0:59:13.480 --> 0:59:16.640 never give outlines or percentages of what you should be 0:59:16.680 --> 0:59:19.000 spending or what you should be saving, because, to be honest, 0:59:19.280 --> 0:59:21.520 if I said to you, all right, Laura, you need 0:59:21.560 --> 0:59:24.840 to be saving twenty percent of your income, you go, okay, 0:59:25.200 --> 0:59:28.520 no problems. I'll calculate what that means. And if by 0:59:28.680 --> 0:59:32.160 chance you're earning fifty thousand dollars twenty percent of your income, 0:59:32.280 --> 0:59:35.800 is such a large amount of money, especially because most 0:59:35.800 --> 0:59:38.480 of us are paying rent or a mortgage or you know, 0:59:38.560 --> 0:59:42.320 have overheads, it's actually unobtainable. Whereas if you were earning 0:59:42.360 --> 0:59:45.560 half a million dollars twenty percent of your income, my friends, 0:59:45.560 --> 0:59:47.840 you should be saving much more than that. So these 0:59:47.880 --> 0:59:51.480 percentages that we've always tried to historically stick to or 0:59:51.520 --> 0:59:54.320 you know us as guides, they actually end up making 0:59:54.360 --> 0:59:58.480 us feel terrible about ourselves because we're comparing somebody else's 0:59:58.480 --> 1:00:02.200 percentages to our person situations. And so I think that 1:00:02.520 --> 1:00:06.360 for us, understanding your budget and then understanding what your 1:00:06.400 --> 1:00:09.080 future goal is is going to help you achieve what 1:00:09.120 --> 1:00:12.640 you're trying to achieve, and not judging yourself and not 1:00:12.760 --> 1:00:16.040 comparing your spending to that of other people's is really 1:00:16.080 --> 1:00:19.360 really important. And once you understand what's coming in and 1:00:19.400 --> 1:00:22.440 out of your bank accounts, you can then make conscious 1:00:22.480 --> 1:00:25.640 decisions about where your money's then going to be allocated. 1:00:26.000 --> 1:00:28.200 Instead of, oh, I spend one hundred dollars and grow 1:00:28.240 --> 1:00:30.560 series a week, I really need that to be fifty dollars, 1:00:31.040 --> 1:00:33.360 Like really, but what if you love food and you 1:00:33.400 --> 1:00:35.840 don't have an expensive gym membership and you know you've 1:00:35.880 --> 1:00:38.160 got all these other things that you don't spend on, 1:00:38.280 --> 1:00:39.160 but food's that one. 1:00:39.280 --> 1:00:39.680 Splurg. 1:00:40.000 --> 1:00:42.160 I don't want you to feel bad because your budget's 1:00:42.200 --> 1:00:43.680 more than what somebody else's is. 1:00:44.160 --> 1:00:46.920 I know for me that I started to use an 1:00:46.920 --> 1:00:49.080 app called and like, guys, this is not a sponsored thing. 1:00:49.160 --> 1:00:52.120 I just use an app called Pocketbook, and it really 1:00:52.280 --> 1:00:54.720 changed how I looked at my finances and it really 1:00:54.800 --> 1:00:57.600 helped me budget because what it does, and I'm sure 1:00:57.640 --> 1:00:59.640 there are hundred apps that do this, guys, but it 1:00:59.760 --> 1:01:01.960 just at the end of the week or month, it 1:01:02.000 --> 1:01:04.760 will literally sum up how much money you had come 1:01:04.800 --> 1:01:07.040 into your bank and how much money you had come out, 1:01:07.160 --> 1:01:09.240 and then it will also categorize it into like this 1:01:09.360 --> 1:01:12.000 much was spent on food, this much was spent on beauty, 1:01:12.040 --> 1:01:14.600 this much was spent on living expenses. And for me, 1:01:14.960 --> 1:01:17.640 that was where I was like whoa, Because every day 1:01:17.680 --> 1:01:19.480 I taped my card for lunch, I tap it for 1:01:19.560 --> 1:01:21.800 Uber Eats, I tap it for a coffee. At the 1:01:21.920 --> 1:01:23.760 end of the month, I was like, I have spent 1:01:24.120 --> 1:01:26.600 thousands on things I probably didn't need to, which was 1:01:26.600 --> 1:01:27.600 all just like food. 1:01:27.600 --> 1:01:30.000 That was why I'm eating my money and I'm eating it. 1:01:30.320 --> 1:01:32.320 I spent more of food than I think almost rent, 1:01:32.400 --> 1:01:35.200 like food, drinks and like coffees and brunches and stuff. 1:01:35.240 --> 1:01:37.240 So that was something that actually helped me. 1:01:37.400 --> 1:01:39.000 But one thing I do want to ask you, because 1:01:39.040 --> 1:01:43.120 I know it's for most Australians it's our number one dream, 1:01:43.240 --> 1:01:43.600 and that. 1:01:43.600 --> 1:01:44.479 Is to own a home. 1:01:44.600 --> 1:01:48.160 Because from day dot we've always been taught that you've 1:01:48.200 --> 1:01:50.080 made it once you own a home. It's imperative to 1:01:50.080 --> 1:01:53.400 get into the housing market. I am starting to think 1:01:53.480 --> 1:01:56.800 more and more that it's not necessarily the only way 1:01:56.920 --> 1:01:59.919 to accumulate wealth, because we're seeing now that the mark 1:02:00.120 --> 1:02:03.800 get in most cities in Australia is more unattainable than ever. 1:02:03.920 --> 1:02:07.720 It is increasing exponentially, way more than inflation, is way 1:02:07.760 --> 1:02:10.360 more than anyone can keep up. Is this still something 1:02:10.400 --> 1:02:12.160 that we should all be striving for? And I know 1:02:12.200 --> 1:02:14.320 that this is a generalized answer, but are there other 1:02:14.400 --> 1:02:17.200 ways for us to start to accumulate wealth? 1:02:17.560 --> 1:02:21.720 Absolutely there are. And it's interesting because I obviously am 1:02:21.760 --> 1:02:24.200 a financial advisor so talk about this every day. And 1:02:24.240 --> 1:02:26.840 recently I actually launched a brand new podcast called The 1:02:26.840 --> 1:02:29.880 Property Playbook, which is all about property and how to 1:02:29.920 --> 1:02:32.440 buy your first home. If that's a decision that you've made. 1:02:32.440 --> 1:02:34.560 But I think the most important thing for you to 1:02:34.640 --> 1:02:38.000 understand is it's actually not for everybody. And I think 1:02:38.040 --> 1:02:40.360 people don't like when I say that because they're like, no, 1:02:40.400 --> 1:02:43.960 we should have equal opportunity. Absolutely you do, but you 1:02:44.080 --> 1:02:46.480 also have the opportunity to say that's not in line 1:02:46.560 --> 1:02:48.920 with my values, it's not in line with what I'm earning. 1:02:49.280 --> 1:02:52.040 And for a lot of people, if you're young and 1:02:52.200 --> 1:02:55.080 you you know, have all these other financial goals to 1:02:55.200 --> 1:02:58.440 save and invest and travel and live the life you 1:02:58.520 --> 1:03:01.440 want to, property is actually going to stunt your ability 1:03:01.480 --> 1:03:04.080 to live the life you want because one, saving for 1:03:04.120 --> 1:03:06.640 a deposit is massive, but then mortgage repayments are on 1:03:06.680 --> 1:03:08.600 top of that, and then you've got land rates and 1:03:08.720 --> 1:03:11.680 taxes and all of that stuff that people seem to 1:03:11.760 --> 1:03:13.720 forget when they're talking about, oh, yeah, but I can 1:03:13.760 --> 1:03:17.880 afford the mortgage, and we just forget the commitment that 1:03:18.120 --> 1:03:22.280 is necessary for a property purchase, when in reality, we 1:03:22.360 --> 1:03:25.440 can actually create wealth for ourselves outside of property. There 1:03:25.480 --> 1:03:28.080 are heaps of different assets we can invest in, and 1:03:28.120 --> 1:03:30.680 something that I've spoken about on my podcast that I 1:03:30.720 --> 1:03:33.880 feel like gets a lot of interest because what we 1:03:34.040 --> 1:03:37.200 don't understand about share investing is why we do it, 1:03:37.520 --> 1:03:40.520 And you'll go, yeah, but it's create wealth, But what. 1:03:40.360 --> 1:03:42.160 Does that genuinely mean? 1:03:42.480 --> 1:03:44.880 And you know, I've got this example that I've piped 1:03:44.920 --> 1:03:47.520 out a million times, but to me, it's one of 1:03:47.560 --> 1:03:50.120 the most impactful. And that's if you're twenty one years 1:03:50.160 --> 1:03:53.320 old and you started investing five hundred dollars a month, 1:03:53.560 --> 1:03:55.520 it's not that much. It is hard to come up 1:03:55.560 --> 1:03:57.640 with five hundred dollars. But if you started at twenty 1:03:57.680 --> 1:04:01.400 one and started investing five hundred dollars am month until 1:04:01.440 --> 1:04:04.120 you retire at the age of sixty five, if you'd 1:04:04.160 --> 1:04:06.640 only saved that amount, you would have two hundred and 1:04:06.680 --> 1:04:09.720 forty thousand dollars in your savings account had you just 1:04:09.760 --> 1:04:12.880 saved it. But if you'd invested it instead of saved it, 1:04:12.920 --> 1:04:15.400 you would have one point two million dollars. 1:04:15.840 --> 1:04:17.840 WHOA, you make me want to go and change everything? 1:04:17.920 --> 1:04:20.920 Yes, And that one point two million dollars sounds great 1:04:20.960 --> 1:04:23.600 and so sexy, like I'm telling you right now how 1:04:23.640 --> 1:04:26.320 to become a millionaire, right, Like, you think that's so great, 1:04:26.760 --> 1:04:29.600 But what people think is that our super and what 1:04:29.640 --> 1:04:32.960 we're actually saving and what we're investing means that when 1:04:33.000 --> 1:04:35.320 we get to sixty five, we start spending it, when 1:04:35.320 --> 1:04:38.080 in reality, that's not what happens at all, because the 1:04:38.160 --> 1:04:40.919 reason that money made its way to one point two 1:04:40.920 --> 1:04:44.000 million dollars is because the money that you invest starts 1:04:44.080 --> 1:04:48.080 making money, and then that money invests itself, and then 1:04:48.120 --> 1:04:51.400 that makes money and it compounds. So that actually means 1:04:51.440 --> 1:04:53.680 that one point two million dollars when you get to 1:04:53.800 --> 1:04:58.960 retirement actually generates you a passive income of about sixty 1:04:59.040 --> 1:05:02.160 thousand dollars a year. Right, So that's sixty grand a 1:05:02.200 --> 1:05:04.480 year that you'd have forever and still have your one 1:05:04.520 --> 1:05:08.880 point two million dollars invested. And that's what wealth creation is. 1:05:09.200 --> 1:05:11.440 So if we want to go all right, let's talk 1:05:11.480 --> 1:05:13.440 about what we want to do in retirement. And I've 1:05:13.480 --> 1:05:15.760 said sixty thousand dollars, you might go Victoria. 1:05:15.800 --> 1:05:16.320 That's not enough. 1:05:16.320 --> 1:05:18.680 I want one hundred and twenty thousand dollars in retirement. 1:05:18.720 --> 1:05:21.000 I really want to. You know, once I pay off 1:05:21.000 --> 1:05:23.200 my home or once I get to retirement, I just 1:05:23.240 --> 1:05:25.160 want one hundred and twenty grand coming in that I 1:05:25.280 --> 1:05:28.840 can spend cool. We're looking at an investment portfolio of 1:05:28.960 --> 1:05:31.040 two point four million dollars. How are we going to 1:05:31.120 --> 1:05:34.840 get there? And that's what financial advice is. That's what 1:05:34.880 --> 1:05:38.160 we're trying to educate you on. Because if I then 1:05:38.200 --> 1:05:40.080 said to you, hey, guys, you're gonna get to retirement, 1:05:40.160 --> 1:05:42.160 you're gonna have a sick income, You're never gonna have 1:05:42.200 --> 1:05:44.200 to worry about being able to pay bills because they'll 1:05:44.240 --> 1:05:47.000 just be cash coming in. You go, oh, so it 1:05:47.040 --> 1:05:50.080 doesn't matter if I don't have a home. No, if 1:05:50.080 --> 1:05:51.959 you don't own property, it doesn't matter, because you're gonna 1:05:51.960 --> 1:05:54.320 have enough income to always rent. You're always going to 1:05:54.360 --> 1:05:56.440 have enough money to put food on the table and 1:05:56.440 --> 1:05:58.040 a roof over your head and live the life that 1:05:58.080 --> 1:05:59.920 you genuinely dream to desire. 1:06:00.480 --> 1:06:01.200 If I said, all. 1:06:01.200 --> 1:06:03.640 Right, well, britt, you need to start saving for your 1:06:03.840 --> 1:06:06.080 very first home, and it's going to take every single 1:06:06.200 --> 1:06:08.320 dollar for the next ten years to save for that, 1:06:08.600 --> 1:06:10.080 and then you're going to have a mortgage that you 1:06:10.160 --> 1:06:12.240 need to pay off, and you'll have that for thirty years, 1:06:12.240 --> 1:06:14.200 and then when you get to retirement, you haven't actually 1:06:14.240 --> 1:06:17.240 put aside any more money to give you that income stream. 1:06:17.320 --> 1:06:19.120 So what you end up with is just the house. 1:06:19.520 --> 1:06:21.320 You still have to work though, because You've still got 1:06:21.360 --> 1:06:23.200 to put food on the table. You can't travel because 1:06:23.200 --> 1:06:25.720 you just you want to work part time and have 1:06:25.760 --> 1:06:28.120 a work life balance. So I think that people just 1:06:28.200 --> 1:06:30.920 immediately assume that the way to create wealth is to 1:06:30.920 --> 1:06:34.320 buy a property, when in reality that's often not the 1:06:34.360 --> 1:06:36.840 case for most of us. And I think that that 1:06:37.000 --> 1:06:40.560 example is really powerful because you go, wait, what, what 1:06:40.600 --> 1:06:42.760 do you mean I could be a millionaire, and it's like, Yeah, 1:06:42.800 --> 1:06:45.440 becoming a millionaire when we are young and we have 1:06:45.600 --> 1:06:48.120 time on our side is not as hard as people 1:06:48.160 --> 1:06:50.600 think it is. But the thing that's hard is the 1:06:50.640 --> 1:06:53.200 commitment that it takes to actually do that. 1:06:53.480 --> 1:06:55.200 I think one of the crazy things as well when 1:06:55.240 --> 1:06:57.400 you think about property is like, yeah, sure you can 1:06:57.440 --> 1:06:59.960 get the mortgage and everything else, but like the fucking 1:07:00.120 --> 1:07:02.120 interest that you're paying. Yes, you look at what the 1:07:02.160 --> 1:07:03.960 interest ends up being and you're like, okay, yeah, sure 1:07:04.000 --> 1:07:05.520 the house costs that much, But then I actually just 1:07:05.560 --> 1:07:08.840 paid a third of the price of that house in interest. 1:07:09.120 --> 1:07:10.640 If you can't pay it off quickly. 1:07:10.400 --> 1:07:13.280 Do not even start me. I have recently bought my 1:07:13.480 --> 1:07:16.600 very first home, and I had a fit the other 1:07:16.680 --> 1:07:19.240 week because my partner and I looked at our mortgage one. 1:07:19.280 --> 1:07:21.360 I nearly died and fell over when I saw how 1:07:21.440 --> 1:07:24.080 much money we owe, just like looking at the banking app. 1:07:24.120 --> 1:07:26.280 It's like negative this amount of money, and I was like, 1:07:26.320 --> 1:07:28.520 oh my gosh, like I'm gonna. 1:07:28.240 --> 1:07:29.880 Die, Like I'm having an aneurysm. 1:07:30.000 --> 1:07:30.640 Oh my gosh. 1:07:30.680 --> 1:07:34.280 We're paying like literally the amount of money that I 1:07:34.440 --> 1:07:37.880 pay in interest per month on my mortgage is the 1:07:37.920 --> 1:07:40.680 amount of money we used to pay in total for rent. 1:07:40.800 --> 1:07:43.160 Yeah. Wow, what It's not okay, I'm not okay. It 1:07:43.200 --> 1:07:43.760 hurts my soul. 1:07:43.880 --> 1:07:44.480 That's not okay. 1:07:44.520 --> 1:07:46.080 This is exactly where we're out at the moment. When 1:07:46.120 --> 1:07:48.040 we're talking about buying a house. I'm like, the thought 1:07:48.120 --> 1:07:49.760 of buying in Sydney and paying off a mortgage for 1:07:49.800 --> 1:07:52.120 the rest of my life sends me into wild fits 1:07:52.120 --> 1:07:54.360 of anxiety. But then this also leads me into the 1:07:54.360 --> 1:07:56.960 next thing, which is debt, because I think, like so 1:07:57.080 --> 1:07:58.920 many of us are dealing with debt, and it's not 1:07:58.960 --> 1:08:00.880 like it has to be critical debt. I'm talking like 1:08:01.560 --> 1:08:03.160 so many of us have like a couple of grand 1:08:03.200 --> 1:08:05.439 stashing a credit card, or we've got a fuck ton 1:08:05.600 --> 1:08:08.200 of after pay and all of those sorts of like 1:08:08.280 --> 1:08:10.720 prepayment apps that we're slowly paying off, but they just 1:08:10.800 --> 1:08:12.720 keep on creeping back up. I want to talk to 1:08:12.720 --> 1:08:16.759 you about how beneficial slash detrimental do you think things 1:08:16.800 --> 1:08:20.040 like after pay are to how we're able to structure 1:08:20.080 --> 1:08:23.559 our finances? And like, they were such a buzz last 1:08:23.640 --> 1:08:25.479 year and the year before, and I think everybody jumped 1:08:25.479 --> 1:08:30.840 on the bandwagon, but now even personally I know how, yeah, 1:08:30.880 --> 1:08:33.120 how bad that can be for somebody who's not across 1:08:33.160 --> 1:08:35.160 their savings exactly. 1:08:35.400 --> 1:08:38.479 And I am again, I think you've worked out pretty 1:08:38.520 --> 1:08:40.960 quickly that I'm pretty blunt when it comes to money stuff. 1:08:41.040 --> 1:08:42.840 I don't like them. I don't like them at all. 1:08:42.880 --> 1:08:45.360 I don't advocate for them. I don't work with any 1:08:45.400 --> 1:08:48.080 of these brands because they genuinely put the consumer in 1:08:48.080 --> 1:08:50.960 a worse off position. They don't actually care about your 1:08:50.960 --> 1:08:55.439 future mental or financial health. And for me, even their 1:08:55.520 --> 1:08:59.000 marketing is getting really tricky, Like their marketing is like, oh, 1:08:59.680 --> 1:09:02.240 use the better way to pay or you know, buy now, 1:09:02.320 --> 1:09:04.519 pay later, and you're just like, wow, that sounds so 1:09:04.680 --> 1:09:07.400 sexy because you know, don't want to cough up that amount, 1:09:07.479 --> 1:09:08.120 But it's. 1:09:08.040 --> 1:09:11.400 Just a credit card debt dressed up as something else. 1:09:11.439 --> 1:09:14.040 And they will all say, yeah, but Victoria, we don't 1:09:14.040 --> 1:09:16.240 have any level of interest. So like, if you meet 1:09:16.240 --> 1:09:19.479 your payments, it's actually better for your cash flow. You go, no, 1:09:19.600 --> 1:09:23.000 it's not, because not everybody can meet those payments forever. 1:09:23.200 --> 1:09:26.559 Like you're making this financial commitment for it might be 1:09:26.600 --> 1:09:29.120 fifty dollars a week for the next four weeks. That 1:09:29.439 --> 1:09:32.320 at the time doesn't seem to matter, but we can't 1:09:32.360 --> 1:09:35.080 predict our financial future. And what if you didn't get 1:09:35.080 --> 1:09:37.719 any shifts next week and you didn't have that fifty 1:09:37.760 --> 1:09:41.280 dollars in you know, your payment bounced or something wasn't 1:09:41.320 --> 1:09:43.479 able to go through or was in the wrong account. 1:09:43.520 --> 1:09:45.759 Like we end up racking up debt on these things 1:09:45.840 --> 1:09:49.439 so so quickly. And it's kind of like, all right, 1:09:49.680 --> 1:09:53.240 I get it. Most fashion retails have it on their website, right, 1:09:53.600 --> 1:09:56.599 But the real question here is why do you need 1:09:56.720 --> 1:09:59.719 If you're planning on purchasing a two hundred dollar dress, 1:10:00.120 --> 1:10:02.400 why do you need an installment? Why do you have 1:10:02.439 --> 1:10:05.240 to pay for it installments? If you need that dress, 1:10:05.280 --> 1:10:07.719 and if that's a choice that you're making, let's actually 1:10:07.760 --> 1:10:10.160 put some time between us and our spending and go cool, 1:10:10.200 --> 1:10:12.120 I really want a new dress. I'm going to my 1:10:12.160 --> 1:10:15.360 friend's wedding, Start putting that fifty bucks aside, and then 1:10:15.439 --> 1:10:18.439 buy that dress, because I guarantee you one, your taste 1:10:18.479 --> 1:10:21.759 will probably change in that period of time because you'll go, oh, 1:10:21.800 --> 1:10:23.760 you're right. I was just on the iconic and I 1:10:23.840 --> 1:10:27.000 just made a really short lived decision, and I really 1:10:27.040 --> 1:10:29.400 wanted to buy it right then and there. But two, 1:10:30.080 --> 1:10:34.120 you're learning to save and create good habits for yourself financially, 1:10:34.560 --> 1:10:38.479 and little things that feel really easy actually put us 1:10:38.560 --> 1:10:41.519 back and don't enable us to create financial habits that 1:10:41.520 --> 1:10:44.479 are going to service for the long term. So for me, no, 1:10:44.600 --> 1:10:47.760 I don't love by now pay late schemes. But as 1:10:47.800 --> 1:10:51.400 businesses they're genius, right, They managed to make millions of 1:10:51.439 --> 1:10:54.679 dollars each year and the businesses themselves are worth close 1:10:54.760 --> 1:10:58.360 to a billion dollars. But as consumers and as women, 1:10:58.520 --> 1:11:00.960 we really should be wary of that these things because 1:11:00.960 --> 1:11:04.120 they are a slippery slope of getting yourself into debt. 1:11:04.200 --> 1:11:06.640 But on that just I don't know if this is 1:11:06.640 --> 1:11:08.559 a myth or not, but we've always been told that 1:11:08.640 --> 1:11:11.280 using after payings it pay and all these installment payments 1:11:11.400 --> 1:11:13.760 can really affect your credit score. So when all of 1:11:13.800 --> 1:11:15.519 a sudden, we're like, oh, if you've been using en 1:11:15.520 --> 1:11:16.920 after pay for this long and you go to buy 1:11:16.920 --> 1:11:18.799 a house, they'll look at your credit score and you'll 1:11:19.200 --> 1:11:21.640 be told, no, is that a myth? Or is this 1:11:21.800 --> 1:11:23.960 there is no pun intended? But is there some credit 1:11:24.000 --> 1:11:28.040 to that? Haha? 1:11:28.840 --> 1:11:30.639 Do not start me on this. 1:11:31.360 --> 1:11:34.360 So one of the biggest buy now pay later companies 1:11:34.400 --> 1:11:39.880 that's currently using a Mythbuster's marketing. It's their current marketing campaign, right, 1:11:39.920 --> 1:11:42.719 and they're like, this buy now pay later app doesn't 1:11:42.760 --> 1:11:46.120 impact your credit score. They're not wrong. It does not 1:11:46.240 --> 1:11:49.599 impact your credit score. If you use it properly, nothing 1:11:49.640 --> 1:11:52.080 will go in your credit score at all. Credit score 1:11:52.120 --> 1:11:55.240 is are reflective of bad credit history, so if you 1:11:55.360 --> 1:11:58.200 actually miss a payment or you go into debt with them, 1:11:58.439 --> 1:12:00.519 then it's going to turn up on your credit score. 1:12:00.840 --> 1:12:04.080 But when we go for mortgages in twenty twenty one, 1:12:04.560 --> 1:12:07.519 you don't just go, hey, my credit scores X and 1:12:08.040 --> 1:12:12.240 give me a mortgage. Banks actually audit your last three 1:12:12.320 --> 1:12:15.160 months worth of buying, and they look at all your 1:12:15.200 --> 1:12:17.760 bank statements, and they look at your credit history. They're 1:12:17.760 --> 1:12:19.960 able to find out what credit cards you have had, 1:12:20.000 --> 1:12:22.720 what learn inquiries you have done what's going on with 1:12:22.800 --> 1:12:26.720 your personal finances, and when they see things like buy now, 1:12:26.760 --> 1:12:30.360 pay later schemes and repayments coming up on your bank statement, 1:12:30.520 --> 1:12:32.439 they look at it and they go, right, well, she 1:12:32.479 --> 1:12:35.320 can't manage her cash flow, She's not a good candidate 1:12:35.360 --> 1:12:38.120 for me to lend money to because if she can't 1:12:38.160 --> 1:12:41.639 manage her finance is well enough to actually buy dresses 1:12:41.720 --> 1:12:45.000 or buy things that are usually discretionary, and discretionary things 1:12:45.000 --> 1:12:48.000 are things we don't necessarily need, then why would I 1:12:48.000 --> 1:12:50.360 give her a mortgage even if she has got the savings. 1:12:50.640 --> 1:12:53.320 And we see this time and time again because I 1:12:53.439 --> 1:12:56.360 own a mortgage broking business as well, So I'm not 1:12:56.479 --> 1:12:58.439 just talking to you guys from the point of view 1:12:58.439 --> 1:13:00.640 where I'm like, oh, yeah, I've heard it, because I 1:13:00.680 --> 1:13:04.160 have a podcast, like I'm a legit financial advisor. I 1:13:04.280 --> 1:13:07.679 own a mortgage broken company, and I can unequivocally say 1:13:07.920 --> 1:13:11.519 I have had clients denied mortgages because they have had 1:13:11.560 --> 1:13:14.840 bad spending habits or they've had too much Uber eats. 1:13:14.880 --> 1:13:16.519 That's another one that my guilty. 1:13:17.080 --> 1:13:18.920 Yeah, but I've seen it come up where you know, 1:13:19.000 --> 1:13:21.760 the bank's like, oh, they're spending habits are wild, like 1:13:22.080 --> 1:13:25.519 they clearly have the savings, but over the last three months, 1:13:25.560 --> 1:13:28.960 like especially during COVID, they've been really lacked, so we're 1:13:28.960 --> 1:13:31.799 not comfortable servicing them. We just don't want to extend 1:13:31.800 --> 1:13:34.680 an offer, and you go, oh, okay. So one of 1:13:34.680 --> 1:13:37.160 my biggest things is if you are at a point 1:13:37.160 --> 1:13:39.439 where you are planning on buying a home and you're 1:13:39.479 --> 1:13:43.360 going for a mortgage, do three months worth of perfect 1:13:43.360 --> 1:13:46.280 spending like get rid of you buy now pay later schemes, 1:13:46.320 --> 1:13:49.160 start really making sure that you're making clear deposits to 1:13:49.200 --> 1:13:52.920 your savings accounts, you know, make less discretionary spend. So 1:13:52.920 --> 1:13:55.360 when the lender looks into your bank history and your 1:13:55.439 --> 1:13:58.639 spending history, they go, wow, BRIT's pretty responsible. You can 1:13:58.680 --> 1:14:00.559 see on here for the last three month months, she's 1:14:00.600 --> 1:14:04.479 put money into savings, she doesn't spend excessively on uber EAT's, 1:14:04.479 --> 1:14:06.920 she's not using by now pay later schemes, and you 1:14:06.960 --> 1:14:09.800 are more likely to look like a sexy candidate to 1:14:09.880 --> 1:14:12.719 a lender. And I think that that's really important as well, 1:14:12.760 --> 1:14:14.960 because these by now pay later schemes they say, oh, 1:14:15.000 --> 1:14:17.960 it doesn't impact your credit history. You're like, you're right, 1:14:18.000 --> 1:14:21.320 it doesn't if I use it responsibly. But credit history 1:14:21.439 --> 1:14:24.960 isn't the only thing that a bank takes into consideration. 1:14:24.920 --> 1:14:27.040 And that's such and it's just an education thing, isn't it. 1:14:27.040 --> 1:14:29.840 Because I know for me, I have only I'm really 1:14:29.880 --> 1:14:31.920 good with credit cards, like I've never had a credit 1:14:31.920 --> 1:14:33.880 card bill, because I've been good with just using money 1:14:33.880 --> 1:14:36.040 that I have. Yeah, But one thing I didn't know 1:14:36.160 --> 1:14:38.160 and I've always been guilty of, was I always had 1:14:38.200 --> 1:14:40.720 the money in the bank in my younger years, but 1:14:40.800 --> 1:14:43.360 when I went to purchase something I used after pay, 1:14:43.479 --> 1:14:47.000 the money was there. But in my mind, it was like, cool, 1:14:47.080 --> 1:14:49.880 if it's not affecting anything, it makes me feel better 1:14:50.040 --> 1:14:52.320 not seeing this lump sum go out at once, And 1:14:52.400 --> 1:14:54.919 I just think it's an education thing. We don't realize 1:14:55.439 --> 1:14:56.960 how that's going to affect us down the track. So 1:14:56.960 --> 1:14:58.960 I think that's really important for people to know now 1:14:59.000 --> 1:15:01.559 that if you a like me and you had the money, 1:15:01.880 --> 1:15:03.200 but it made you feel a little bit better to 1:15:03.240 --> 1:15:06.280 see larger sums in your bank for longer, just really 1:15:06.280 --> 1:15:08.000 rethink that if you're going to buy it anyway, like 1:15:08.040 --> 1:15:10.280 you said, just purchase it now so that one day 1:15:10.320 --> 1:15:11.519 when you want to go get your loan. 1:15:11.920 --> 1:15:13.479 There's nothing that's going to stop you from doing that. 1:15:13.960 --> 1:15:17.040 But also I think the question there is then, okay, well, 1:15:17.080 --> 1:15:18.880 if you didn't want the money to go out of 1:15:18.920 --> 1:15:22.000 the bank more than you wanted that dress or those shoes, 1:15:22.120 --> 1:15:24.320 like should you really be making that decision in the 1:15:24.360 --> 1:15:26.360 first place, Like if you want to keep that two 1:15:26.439 --> 1:15:28.599 hundred dollars in your account more than you want the dress, 1:15:28.640 --> 1:15:31.920 I think you really should be considering that as something 1:15:31.960 --> 1:15:35.360 that's actually positive and a really good money habit. Whereas 1:15:35.720 --> 1:15:38.720 by now pay later schemes and you know, companies are 1:15:38.840 --> 1:15:41.000 enabling you to go, oh, it doesn't matter, it's only 1:15:41.040 --> 1:15:43.519 fifty dollars now instead of the full two hundred, and 1:15:43.560 --> 1:15:46.400 you go, oh, that makes me feel better, But in reality, 1:15:46.439 --> 1:15:49.200 you're not better off financially. You just feel better in 1:15:49.240 --> 1:15:52.120 that moment. And I think making decisions, you really need 1:15:52.160 --> 1:15:55.479 to consider whether it's actually better fitting you or if 1:15:55.520 --> 1:15:58.840 it's putting future you behind. And I talk a lot 1:15:58.880 --> 1:16:02.640 on my podcast about really prioritizing future you because they 1:16:02.680 --> 1:16:05.240 are so special and so important and they're going to 1:16:05.320 --> 1:16:08.360 be so grateful when you have made a whole heap 1:16:08.400 --> 1:16:11.280 of great money decisions for them. And if you keep 1:16:11.280 --> 1:16:14.559 making money decisions that puts future you behind, Like that's 1:16:14.680 --> 1:16:16.759 not the kindest thing you can do to yourself. 1:16:16.880 --> 1:16:19.559 And realistically, like doing things like this, I mean any 1:16:19.600 --> 1:16:21.679 sort of like lay by system or anything where you're 1:16:21.840 --> 1:16:24.080 taking a shortcut but you're just then kicking your debt 1:16:24.080 --> 1:16:26.880 down the road doesn't actually get you in any better 1:16:27.000 --> 1:16:29.880 financial situation. I mean, I know for me, and one 1:16:29.880 --> 1:16:31.200 of the reasons why I was really stroked to get 1:16:31.200 --> 1:16:33.639 you on here is because when I started my business, 1:16:34.120 --> 1:16:36.040 I didn't know how to do a business. And like, 1:16:36.240 --> 1:16:37.600 I know that we're going to have some more of 1:16:37.640 --> 1:16:40.920 these conversations coming up. But I got out of credit 1:16:41.000 --> 1:16:43.559 card and was funding my business via credit card because 1:16:43.560 --> 1:16:45.400 I didn't fucking know what else to do. I need 1:16:45.439 --> 1:16:47.439 a cash flow, I didn't have investors, and I ended 1:16:47.479 --> 1:16:50.519 up just buying stock on credit and then hoping to 1:16:50.600 --> 1:16:52.880 sell it. And it was not how you start a business. 1:16:52.920 --> 1:16:55.080 And I'm going to come out and say that first off, guys, 1:16:55.240 --> 1:16:57.559 but I got myself into a situation where all I 1:16:57.600 --> 1:16:59.720 was doing was further kicking debt down the road and 1:16:59.840 --> 1:17:01.760 just paying off the interest on that debt, and I 1:17:01.800 --> 1:17:03.720 was never actually able to get back on top of it. 1:17:03.760 --> 1:17:05.879 And I think if you are ever in a position 1:17:05.920 --> 1:17:09.640 where that is all you're doing, that's where the anxiety 1:17:09.680 --> 1:17:11.320 starts to come in because you get this to this 1:17:11.320 --> 1:17:13.240 point where you're like, I'm never ever going to get 1:17:13.280 --> 1:17:15.040 on top of this. And I think especially when it's 1:17:15.080 --> 1:17:17.639 a voluntary thing, when it's like, oh, you're putting yourself 1:17:17.680 --> 1:17:19.400 in this position because it's over a dress or a 1:17:19.400 --> 1:17:23.040 handbag or something that's really inconsequential to your life, actually 1:17:23.080 --> 1:17:25.280 the purchase at the end of the day, be really 1:17:25.320 --> 1:17:27.880 mindful with that, because yeah, definitely got myself into a 1:17:27.880 --> 1:17:28.960 bit of a problem with after. 1:17:28.800 --> 1:17:29.360 Pay as well. 1:17:30.920 --> 1:17:32.840 Be warned, my friends, We've lived it. 1:17:32.960 --> 1:17:37.960 Guys, Victoria, we have so many like, so many subcategories 1:17:38.000 --> 1:17:39.479 that we wanted to talk to you about. Then we 1:17:39.520 --> 1:17:41.080 do want to talk to you about, but there's literally 1:17:41.200 --> 1:17:43.200 not enough time in these episodes. So we are one 1:17:43.280 --> 1:17:46.040 hundred percent going to get you back because I feel 1:17:46.040 --> 1:17:48.360 like for us, this was just like a real overview, 1:17:48.439 --> 1:17:50.400 very basic overview where we wanted to touch on a 1:17:50.439 --> 1:17:53.200 few topics just to get the brain ticking and really 1:17:53.200 --> 1:17:55.920 try and reassess all of our own situations. But we'll 1:17:55.960 --> 1:17:58.400 definitely get you back on. But before we let you go, 1:17:59.200 --> 1:18:01.240 you have a book that is. 1:18:01.280 --> 1:18:02.920 Coming out tomorrow. 1:18:03.400 --> 1:18:06.799 If you're listening to this live tomorrow, which is June sixteenth, 1:18:06.880 --> 1:18:08.679 if you've listened in the past, that's when it's come out. 1:18:08.880 --> 1:18:09.840 Tell us about your book. 1:18:09.960 --> 1:18:12.400 Oh my gosh, I'm so excited about my book. I 1:18:12.439 --> 1:18:14.760 think the main selling point here is it's peach with 1:18:14.920 --> 1:18:18.639 gold foil, Like my publishers literally put goldfoil on my book, 1:18:18.680 --> 1:18:20.680 which obviously that means you should buy it. 1:18:21.120 --> 1:18:22.639 But for me, writing a. 1:18:22.560 --> 1:18:25.800 Book was so powerful because I just felt, like, you know, 1:18:25.960 --> 1:18:28.240 I started this podcast from a place of love, and 1:18:28.280 --> 1:18:32.000 I started it because I'm so wildly passionate about empowering 1:18:32.040 --> 1:18:35.479 particularly women to just take control of their financial lives. 1:18:35.880 --> 1:18:37.880 And you know, it never started from me going I'm 1:18:37.880 --> 1:18:39.840 going to start a business, Like I was just like 1:18:40.160 --> 1:18:42.720 genuinely young and dumb and just thought, oh, this will 1:18:42.720 --> 1:18:46.400 be fun, like podcasts are cool, we feel your baby, yeah, 1:18:46.439 --> 1:18:49.479 not realizing the impact that we could have and it 1:18:49.600 --> 1:18:52.160 was so fun to do. But then I realized the 1:18:52.200 --> 1:18:55.799 impact I was having, and you know, then being asked 1:18:55.840 --> 1:18:58.639 to publish a book was me going wow, like this 1:18:58.720 --> 1:19:01.680 is an extension of the reach the podcast has and 1:19:01.680 --> 1:19:05.160 this opportunity to change lives, and so for me that 1:19:05.200 --> 1:19:07.559 she's on. The Money book is your end to end 1:19:07.600 --> 1:19:10.800 guide to financial freedom and creating a financial life that 1:19:10.840 --> 1:19:14.240 you're really proud of. We cover everything from money stories 1:19:14.280 --> 1:19:17.479 and reframing what your money story looks like because your 1:19:18.000 --> 1:19:20.679 money history and your money story is not your fault, 1:19:21.320 --> 1:19:23.559 all the way through to budgeting and cash flow and 1:19:23.600 --> 1:19:26.080 how to invest and in fact how much money it 1:19:26.120 --> 1:19:28.880 costs to have a baby in Australia, from a number 1:19:28.920 --> 1:19:32.280 of different experiences from women I've spoken to, all the 1:19:32.320 --> 1:19:34.840 way through to retirement, which is not as sexy, but 1:19:34.880 --> 1:19:37.760 I do try to make it sound a little bit sexy. 1:19:38.120 --> 1:19:40.720 But it's genuinely a book that I'm so proud of 1:19:40.800 --> 1:19:43.040 because I feel like it's one of those things that 1:19:43.080 --> 1:19:45.080 I feel like I'm gifting people and I'm just like, 1:19:45.080 --> 1:19:46.600 you know what, I've written this book and if you 1:19:46.680 --> 1:19:48.840 read it, it'll be everything that you need to know 1:19:49.120 --> 1:19:50.840 to make sure that you stay out of debt and 1:19:50.880 --> 1:19:53.040 you stay on the right path and you can achieve 1:19:53.080 --> 1:19:55.000 financial freedom within this lifetime. 1:19:55.360 --> 1:19:56.600 So that's what it is. 1:19:56.640 --> 1:19:59.160 Bok I did sneakily read it. I know, yeah, I 1:19:59.200 --> 1:20:00.400 sneakly got to read it. 1:20:00.880 --> 1:20:02.720 You did, and it really is. 1:20:02.680 --> 1:20:04.639 Amazing, And I mean, I think the thing about you 1:20:04.840 --> 1:20:07.479 is that the reason your podcast has so much reach 1:20:07.479 --> 1:20:10.160 and has been so popular is because you do simplify things, 1:20:10.240 --> 1:20:12.760 and you do make things on a level that we 1:20:12.760 --> 1:20:15.080 can all understand, whether we do have that business mind 1:20:15.160 --> 1:20:17.720 or that finance mind. You make it so like it 1:20:17.840 --> 1:20:19.680 just broke down how much we could save when we 1:20:19.760 --> 1:20:22.439 go into retirement. When you break it down to something 1:20:22.600 --> 1:20:25.800 so simple, it really has so much more effect and 1:20:25.800 --> 1:20:28.280 it's so much more powerful. So, guys, if this interests 1:20:28.320 --> 1:20:30.280 you at all and you're looking to make some changes 1:20:30.280 --> 1:20:31.799 in your life, or you want to buy a house, 1:20:31.960 --> 1:20:33.519 or maybe you just want to go and buy those 1:20:33.560 --> 1:20:38.280 Gucci bags, read Victoria's book, and Victoria before we go, 1:20:38.600 --> 1:20:41.400 tell everyone where else they can find you. Where's your podcast? 1:20:41.600 --> 1:20:42.759 What's your Instagram handle? 1:20:42.960 --> 1:20:45.799 So the podcast is She's on the Money, and hopefully 1:20:45.840 --> 1:20:49.040 you can type that into any podcasting app and find us. 1:20:49.120 --> 1:20:52.599 If you can't, I'm concerned, then on Instagram where She's 1:20:52.640 --> 1:20:54.559 on the Money aus And if you want to find 1:20:54.560 --> 1:20:58.519 me personally, I am on Instagram at Victoria Underscore divine. 1:20:58.800 --> 1:21:01.160 Thank you so much for taking time for us today, Vittoria. 1:21:01.200 --> 1:21:02.360 It's been the best. 1:21:02.680 --> 1:21:04.559 Oh my gosh, thank you for hanging out. We'll see 1:21:04.600 --> 1:21:07.200 you again, Sue, We will and it's exciting. 1:21:07.600 --> 1:21:13.639 Oh yes, stay tuned, guys. Okay, guys, you know we 1:21:13.760 --> 1:21:17.040 never finish an episode without our suck and our sweet, 1:21:17.040 --> 1:21:19.200 our highlight and our low light of the week. 1:21:19.360 --> 1:21:21.479 So Laura, you can kick it off this week. What's 1:21:21.479 --> 1:21:21.920 your suck? 1:21:22.080 --> 1:21:23.680 Well, my suck is that I spent the beginning of 1:21:23.680 --> 1:21:26.320 this week in hospital with Lola. As you guys already know, 1:21:26.400 --> 1:21:29.519 especially if you listened to the last episode, Lola had 1:21:29.600 --> 1:21:31.639 some funky eye thing happening. 1:21:31.720 --> 1:21:35.240 Who I Well, it wasn't pink eye. It was ocular colitis. 1:21:35.360 --> 1:21:39.960 What was it? From Pooh? Marley gave Lola pink eye? 1:21:40.000 --> 1:21:40.760 I'm pretty sure. 1:21:40.800 --> 1:21:42.839 Look, if we're going to try and figure out what happened, 1:21:43.320 --> 1:21:46.719 I reckon a pretty educated guess is that Marley stuck 1:21:46.720 --> 1:21:47.880 her finger in Lola's eye. 1:21:47.960 --> 1:21:49.960 That's like if I'm just gonna take a wild stab 1:21:49.960 --> 1:21:51.760 in the dark. Look it was Matt, Marley or you 1:21:51.920 --> 1:21:54.639 so that it would take a wild stab in the eye. 1:21:54.800 --> 1:21:56.560 I reckon it was Marley So I was in the 1:21:56.560 --> 1:21:58.920 hospital for a couple of days with Lola. Hospitals are 1:21:59.000 --> 1:22:01.760 very uncomfortable. It's just a really grim place. Like it's 1:22:01.960 --> 1:22:05.800 amazing in that, like the hospital staff are incredible throughout 1:22:05.840 --> 1:22:08.640 the children's hospital. Being there with something that's like so 1:22:09.600 --> 1:22:12.799 non life threatening, you know, something that was like pretty benign, 1:22:12.840 --> 1:22:15.200 and she just needed to have antibiotics. For seeing how 1:22:15.200 --> 1:22:17.599 amazing the staff was was like, that's a really special thing. 1:22:17.840 --> 1:22:20.120 The sweet of my week is I mean, the suit 1:22:20.120 --> 1:22:22.160 of my week is both my kids. But Molly is 1:22:23.200 --> 1:22:25.519 just for her vocabulary, Like she can say so many 1:22:25.560 --> 1:22:28.439 things now it's her birthday this weekend she's turning to 1:22:28.760 --> 1:22:31.200 and it just blows my mind how many words she 1:22:31.240 --> 1:22:33.160 can say now, and like the sass that they say 1:22:33.200 --> 1:22:34.880 it in as well. And I know that anyone who's 1:22:34.880 --> 1:22:36.280 not a mum is probably just gonna be like eyey, 1:22:36.439 --> 1:22:38.880 boring kids stuff. But like even the other day I 1:22:38.920 --> 1:22:40.400 came home, I'd just gone up to go get a 1:22:40.439 --> 1:22:42.000 coffee and I walked in the door and opened the 1:22:42.000 --> 1:22:42.360 door and. 1:22:42.320 --> 1:22:47.960 She goes, hey, where are you bean? You're too what 1:22:48.040 --> 1:22:49.479 do you mean? Where have I been? 1:22:49.720 --> 1:22:52.080 Also, I can't believe she's too okay, wage you know, 1:22:52.160 --> 1:22:54.920 she said to Lola today, so ill and I'm gonna stop. 1:22:54.960 --> 1:22:57.000 I realized this, but I call Lola like my little 1:22:57.040 --> 1:22:59.840 fatty right, which I know someone's gonna be listening to this, 1:23:00.200 --> 1:23:02.599 like you're gonna put some deep seated trauma into your child. 1:23:02.600 --> 1:23:04.960 Stop doing it. She's four months old. She will never 1:23:05.120 --> 1:23:08.160 remember these, these times of her life. But I realized 1:23:08.200 --> 1:23:10.799 I can't say this because this morning I had Lola 1:23:10.880 --> 1:23:13.160 and Marley in bed, and Marley just rolls over to 1:23:13.200 --> 1:23:16.360 Lola and goes lollly off fat I was. 1:23:16.360 --> 1:23:18.240 Like, I'm a terrible mother. 1:23:18.439 --> 1:23:21.160 Yes, they're vacuums, like you don't even realize you say 1:23:21.200 --> 1:23:21.960 something that they listen. 1:23:22.000 --> 1:23:24.559 They pick everything up. But anyway, Marley's just like she's 1:23:24.600 --> 1:23:26.559 just the best. She's so fine. Okay, So no more 1:23:26.600 --> 1:23:28.640 fatty Lola. No, I can't call it. 1:23:28.760 --> 1:23:31.640 No, no, you can't call your kid names, even like endearingly, 1:23:31.960 --> 1:23:34.080 because she's just so cutely the little legs and little 1:23:34.160 --> 1:23:36.200 arms and a little billy and it just want to 1:23:36.240 --> 1:23:38.200 eat She's like a potato with eyes. 1:23:38.400 --> 1:23:39.400 You definitely want to eat her. 1:23:39.479 --> 1:23:41.160 Yeah, well I want to slow cook her and put 1:23:41.200 --> 1:23:43.120 some salafree too, much. 1:23:44.040 --> 1:23:47.080 She's not Nutchos. I hate my sack. My suck is 1:23:47.080 --> 1:23:47.800 really quick and easy. 1:23:47.880 --> 1:23:51.160 I ordered some shoes online and they came in my size, 1:23:51.200 --> 1:23:52.439 but they sent me men's shoes. 1:23:52.479 --> 1:23:54.759 That is so annoying. So they're too big. 1:23:55.080 --> 1:23:57.559 Well, they sent you your size, but men's side. Yeah, so 1:23:57.600 --> 1:23:59.920 it's too big. So I got the right size for men. 1:24:00.240 --> 1:24:01.880 And that's really annoying because I don't have time now. 1:24:01.920 --> 1:24:07.640 I leave him four days, so like hate life. Just 1:24:07.680 --> 1:24:10.840 spent three days at the hospital. Yeah, no, look, we 1:24:10.880 --> 1:24:12.320 cannot compare our sucks this week. 1:24:12.360 --> 1:24:13.400 We cannot. No. 1:24:13.479 --> 1:24:15.000 Look, that's the worst thing that happened to me this week, 1:24:15.040 --> 1:24:16.479 and that was literally I could think about. So I've 1:24:16.479 --> 1:24:19.320 had a pretty good week. My suite was going to 1:24:19.320 --> 1:24:21.599 the Hunter Valley with my family. I can't deny that. 1:24:21.720 --> 1:24:24.240 We're a real family family, so we love hanging out. 1:24:24.240 --> 1:24:27.160 We're all really good friends. My parents. We don't look 1:24:27.160 --> 1:24:29.160 at my parents like parents, they look at us like kids. 1:24:29.160 --> 1:24:30.960 We're all just like friends. So we just had the 1:24:30.960 --> 1:24:32.960 best time. We had so much laughter, We ate so much. 1:24:32.960 --> 1:24:35.519 We drunk so much, and every single time I do it, 1:24:35.560 --> 1:24:37.479 I'm like, I need to do this more. I need 1:24:37.520 --> 1:24:39.600 to and I think with what's going on in the 1:24:39.600 --> 1:24:41.320 world too, I think it's important that we do start 1:24:41.360 --> 1:24:43.439 to prioritize family and friends a little bit more. I've 1:24:43.479 --> 1:24:45.679 been really slack on that behalf. I just let work 1:24:45.760 --> 1:24:48.800 overwhelm me, and all of a sudden, six months goes past, 1:24:48.840 --> 1:24:51.519 and I think everyone will resonate with what I mean 1:24:51.560 --> 1:24:53.559 by that, where all of a sudden, we're in the 1:24:53.600 --> 1:24:56.360 middle of the year. It's the middle of twenty twenty one. 1:24:56.600 --> 1:24:58.320 So I don't know. I just got really deep for 1:24:58.320 --> 1:24:59.920 a minute, but I call someone and telling me you love. 1:25:00.240 --> 1:25:01.920 I feel like this happens every year. I feel like 1:25:02.000 --> 1:25:02.439 every year. 1:25:02.560 --> 1:25:04.320 Maybe it's just like that we're getting older, but the 1:25:04.360 --> 1:25:06.360 older you get, the faster the years ago, and the 1:25:06.479 --> 1:25:08.960 faster we're careening towards our deaths. 1:25:09.600 --> 1:25:15.240 Thank you for listening to Life Long No, I completely agree. 1:25:15.240 --> 1:25:16.400 But I also think that there's going to be a 1:25:16.439 --> 1:25:17.760 lot of people out there who are listening to this 1:25:17.880 --> 1:25:20.040 who have been separated from their families in the last 1:25:20.080 --> 1:25:21.920 year or year and a half, whatever it's been. And 1:25:22.360 --> 1:25:24.360 as much as we want to prioritize our families, there's 1:25:24.400 --> 1:25:27.280 definitely going to be people out there who aren't able 1:25:27.320 --> 1:25:30.800 to at the moment, so like, whatever it is, zoom FaceTime, 1:25:31.120 --> 1:25:32.400 call them, text them. 1:25:32.800 --> 1:25:34.040 This is your little reminder. 1:25:34.160 --> 1:25:35.600 You know, I think that we always get through the 1:25:35.680 --> 1:25:37.040 day and we're like, oh shit, I was supposed to 1:25:37.080 --> 1:25:39.400 call Nan today, I'll call it tomorrow. Oh shit, I'll 1:25:39.439 --> 1:25:41.360 call her on this day. And I know I do 1:25:41.400 --> 1:25:43.040 it all the time as well. So if you needed 1:25:43.040 --> 1:25:45.760 this reminder to call your Nan or your mom or 1:25:45.880 --> 1:25:47.960 somebody who you love and you've been putting it off, 1:25:48.360 --> 1:25:49.920 just call them Cinema text. 1:25:49.920 --> 1:25:52.160 And if you are still separating from your family, we are. 1:25:52.280 --> 1:25:55.200 We really feel for you, and our thoughts are with you, 1:25:55.200 --> 1:25:56.559 and we hope that you do get to see them 1:25:56.680 --> 1:25:59.479 very very soon. Now, guys, if you love the episode, 1:25:59.520 --> 1:26:03.080 you know the drill, go leave a review, subscribe, jump 1:26:03.120 --> 1:26:05.639 on the Facebook group which is Life Uncut Discussion group, 1:26:05.680 --> 1:26:07.720 and also follow us on Instagram which is. 1:26:07.720 --> 1:26:08.960 Also Life on Cut podcast. 1:26:09.200 --> 1:26:11.360 And tell your mom, take your dad, tell your friends, 1:26:11.360 --> 1:26:14.519 and tell everyone and share the love because we love 1:26:14.600 --> 1:26:14.640 that