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Speaker 1: And Amanda jam Nation love chatting to Jacinda Adern and

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Speaker 1: as I said in the interview, her book begins with

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Speaker 1: a dilemma that many couples, but particularly women, have had

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Speaker 1: to face. You want to be pregnant, but the timing

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Speaker 1: is wrong, not wrong, tricky. Where are your priorities? It's

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Speaker 1: so so hard. She's waiting to hear if she's going

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Speaker 1: to be prime minister. She's trying to form a deal

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Speaker 1: with another with other factions to see if she's going

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Speaker 1: to be prime minister.

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Speaker 2: The pregnancy testing.

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Speaker 1: She's got a pregnancy test sitting on the counter. Those

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Speaker 1: two things are existing at the same time.

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Speaker 2: And this is what she said.

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Speaker 1: Did you feel in that moment I can make both work? No,

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Speaker 1: And it's so hard, and it is really like idea

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Speaker 1: years of IVF. So you cannot control the timing of anything,

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Speaker 1: and you think, is now a bad time?

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Speaker 2: Is now a good time? Please?

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Speaker 1: Anytime, any time, anytime. But for so many, so many couples,

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Speaker 1: men and women, it can come at the trickiest times.

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Speaker 1: It's kind of your life is much easier for guys,

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Speaker 1: it certainly is. But at the same time, what if

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Speaker 1: you're waiting for a promotion that's going to have you

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Speaker 1: traveling overseas or something like that. As a couple, the

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Speaker 1: chiming can be tricky, so we thought we'd.

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Speaker 2: Hear your stories.

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Speaker 1: The tribal drums beating, We're charmingly calling it this bad

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Speaker 1: time to get knocked up.

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Speaker 2: No, it all ends up being great, of course it does.

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Speaker 1: But when you're in the soup of the moment, you're going, wow,

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Speaker 1: could this have been at a trickier time?

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Speaker 3: Karen has joined us.

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Speaker 2: What was the time in Karen? What was going on

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Speaker 2: for you?

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Speaker 4: Good morning? I was told by doctors that I wouldn't

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Speaker 4: for pregnant easily and all of that sort of thing,

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Speaker 4: So being pregnant was not something that I was thinking about.

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Speaker 4: And my husband and I were just about.

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Speaker 5: To sign for a house, to purchase a house, and

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Speaker 5: my mum kept saying, you're pregnant, you're pregnant, and I'm like,

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Speaker 5: bought a pregnancy test and I'm like, all right, I'll

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Speaker 5: do the test.

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Speaker 4: Just to make you stop telling me what you think

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Speaker 4: you know. And it turns out.

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Speaker 5: I was pregnant.

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Speaker 1: And so were you out to sign for a house

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Speaker 1: many that you needed your income and all that stuff.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, absolutely, undred percent. So we didn't end up getting

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Speaker 4: the house because we didn't know how well I'd be during.

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Speaker 5: Pregnancy and all of that sort of thing. So yeah,

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Speaker 5: so we didn't end up purchasing the home.

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Speaker 2: And it was your mum that said take the test.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, and it turns out I was eleven weeks pregnant.

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Speaker 2: Wowow. And so now have you got baby and house?

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Speaker 4: Baby and another baby and a house? Yes, right.

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Speaker 2: Home. I often think about it. I really have great

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Speaker 2: empathy for women. Women. This happens, you know, you get

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Speaker 2: a new job or something like that.

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Speaker 1: Happens, and you can't stop yourself. As I know from

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Speaker 1: my IVF years, your life has to go ahead because

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Speaker 1: you may not end up with a bundle in your arms.

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Speaker 2: So you have to have a life. You've got to

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Speaker 2: have a lot, You've got to have a life. I'm

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Speaker 2: glad that everything's working out. Thanks, thank you. Tracy has

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Speaker 2: joined us illo.

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Speaker 1: Tracy, what was the poor timing for you?

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Speaker 3: Good morning? Like you, Amanda, I did the old IVF journey,

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Speaker 3: and like your previous caller, I was told that, you know,

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Speaker 3: age was one of those things and I was not

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Speaker 3: going to be fortunate enough to have a baby. So

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Speaker 3: we did the IVF journey, started a new job. Everything

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Speaker 3: was going great. It was time to go for our transfer,

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Speaker 3: transfer this transfer, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes to do

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Speaker 3: all that. I just started a new job. I remember

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Speaker 3: saying to my professor at the time, I've got a trance.

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Speaker 3: I've got a work conference that day. Can we change

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Speaker 3: the transfer date?

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Speaker 2: And he looked at you like you're an idiot?

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Speaker 3: He did? He said no, and both.

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Speaker 1: Because your whole body, the whole timing of the drugs

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Speaker 1: is to take it to a certain moment. You can't

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Speaker 1: control any of the timing. It's so hard.

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Speaker 6: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: And my husband said, like, you know, it's not like

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Speaker 3: we're going grocery shopping here, Trace, you know which, I

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Speaker 3: had to have a baby. I'm like, okay, so I

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Speaker 3: have to fix up until, you know, tell my new workplace.

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Speaker 3: I kind of come, I'm trying to have a baby.

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Speaker 2: And did you get a baby? Tracy?

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Speaker 3: I did? She's eighteen in October.

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Speaker 2: Really, just how did you just go in the job?

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Speaker 2: You stayed in the job.

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Speaker 3: They were quite they were quite empathetic. She my area

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Speaker 3: manager actually said to me, Tracy, I knew you were

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Speaker 3: trying to have a baby. I was just waiting for

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Speaker 3: you to come and you know, and let us know

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Speaker 3: that this is a journey that you were taking. You've

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Speaker 3: got nothing to worry about.

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Speaker 2: See Voss was a woman, makes it different.

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Speaker 1: But also Walt Disney famously Julie Andrews waited for until

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Speaker 1: you know, she had three kids.

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Speaker 2: He wanted her to play Mary Poppins. Always say I

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Speaker 2: want you for Mary Poppins.

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Speaker 1: He waited seven years, really because he knew that she

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Speaker 1: was right for the role.

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Speaker 6: And she said, now I'm having a baby, and he was, well,

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Speaker 6: when you finished having that baby?

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Speaker 2: Really? And then he called her and he gets, but

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Speaker 2: I'm having another baby. And then so what had the patience?

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Speaker 1: Ironically, rather than freezing embryo as you froze his own head.

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Speaker 2: Like I'll never let it go. I know it's not true,

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Speaker 2: but I'll let you know that. Ben's with a seller.

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Speaker 6: Ben, guys love your work.

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Speaker 2: What was the timing? Ben?

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Speaker 6: First of all, just sent her. I thought the vulnerability

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Speaker 6: was just beautiful.

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Speaker 1: The loveliest person to talk to. I was so taken

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Speaker 1: with her.

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Speaker 6: Very inspiring. Yeah, look here's my almost nine years ago,

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Speaker 6: my son was ready to be born, my wife was

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Speaker 6: in labor with our first child, and we just moved

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Speaker 6: into her new house. It was a complete mess. But

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Speaker 6: here's the kicker, guys. My wife was an accounting and

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Speaker 6: she was in the middle of the end of year

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Speaker 6: financial reporting for a company which was also registered with

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Speaker 6: the Stock Exchange, and the boss and said, you need

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Speaker 6: to get these numbers to me because otherwise a company

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Speaker 6: will be delisted. So she goes into labor we head

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Speaker 6: and had the baby after thirty six hours later and

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Speaker 6: where she's kicking across a birthing ward. But on the

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Speaker 6: Monday morning, her laptop arrio for a giant tad in

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Speaker 6: a box of chocolates. Day one birth in recovery after

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Speaker 6: having a massive cesarian caesarian operation to have the baby removed.

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Speaker 6: He's almost nineteen, that he's healthy, happy, we got three boys.

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Speaker 6: But I'll never forget the fact that her boss had

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Speaker 6: the height to send her at her laptop on the

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Speaker 6: Monday morning to say those numbers police, congratulations and we

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Speaker 6: look forward to seeing you back at work very soon.

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Speaker 6: And she's back at work a week later when she

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Speaker 6: wasn't even supposed to be driving a week later.

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Speaker 1: Wow did she work on that Monday and get them

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Speaker 1: figures in I'm anxious for everybody.

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Speaker 6: A man she did, and that the company was not delisted.

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Speaker 2: So imagine that.

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Speaker 1: Imagine the pressure of that. This is what people don't

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Speaker 1: appreciate the pressure of. We're in a deal list the company.

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Speaker 1: If you don't finish these things and you've just had

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Speaker 1: a thirty six hour labor that's ended in a cesarion

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Speaker 1: and a newborn baby in your arms, well, wow.

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Speaker 2: Ben, you wouldn't be able to sit the laptop anywhere,

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Speaker 2: certainly not in your lap. Oh my goodness, what a story.

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Speaker 2: Thank you, Ben,