Speaker 1: Hello, it's art Zimone here and welcome back to the
Speaker 1: Palate Cleanser. And what have I been up to this week? Well,
Speaker 1: I recently carjack someone while I.
Speaker 2: Was dressed as Cafday Night.
Speaker 1: I thought I'd catch up with you and tell you
Speaker 1: about what I've been up to recently, which was a
Speaker 1: moment that I'm not very proud of, and I was
Speaker 1: very embarrassed at the time and I can look back
Speaker 1: on it and.
Speaker 2: Laugh at it now.
Speaker 1: But recently I was in Sydney doing our Fountlakes in
Speaker 1: Lockdown show. He had a return season there went splendidly,
Speaker 1: thanks for asking everyone. But while I was there, I
Speaker 1: had to go and do a bit of press. I'd
Speaker 1: go out to another radio station. Can't say the name
Speaker 1: here because you know, conflict of interest, Triple J. Anyway,
Speaker 1: so I was at Triple J at the ABC studios
Speaker 1: in Sydney and I did a Love Drive Time Live
Speaker 1: cross and I was dressed as Cat Day Night at
Speaker 1: the time because the interview was just before we had
Speaker 1: our show for the evening. So I was like, look,
Speaker 1: I'll do it in full drag, Cat drag, you know.
Speaker 1: So I had my perm on, I had my knitche
Speaker 1: to walk about one bat jumper, a nice Jenny Flatt,
Speaker 1: and a white caperri from Miller's. So I was feeling
Speaker 1: ultra glamorous and I had to get an uber back
Speaker 1: to the theater and I ordered the uber and a
Speaker 1: car drives up and it says my car's there, and
Speaker 1: the number plate was like one XF, and I was like, perfect,
Speaker 1: I looked one XF. So my wave with the guy
Speaker 1: in the car gives me this look. But I'm used
Speaker 1: to catching ubers in drag all the time and I
Speaker 1: always get this look. Like every single time, I get
Speaker 1: this weird like oh, like they're always scared that there's
Speaker 1: a drag queen.
Speaker 2: So I was like, oh, well this checks out. Yes. Hello.
Speaker 1: So I just opened the door after waving at this
Speaker 1: man and he still looks a bit confused. I'm like hi, yep,
Speaker 1: and he's like no, no, no, no no, And I
Speaker 1: was like ha ha ha ha ha because this happens
Speaker 1: to me in ubers all the time.
Speaker 2: They freak out because they're.
Speaker 1: Like, oh, do a queen all so scary and he's
Speaker 1: like no, no, no, no no no, And I was like, no,
Speaker 1: that's me, yes, yes, that's me, and He's like no, no, no,
Speaker 1: no no, and I'm looking at him to be confused
Speaker 1: because I'm cathay Night and he's not clearly enjoying the experience.
Speaker 1: And I sit in the back seat and he's like, no, no,
Speaker 1: no no. I was like Uber Uber for art, and
Speaker 1: he's like, no, I'm not an Uber driver.
Speaker 3: And I.
Speaker 1: Had to quickly step out of that car and apologize
Speaker 1: profusely while just as cathday Night and look across the
Speaker 1: car lot and there there is another car with exactly
Speaker 1: the first three letters and numbers as the number plate
Speaker 1: that I had just got into, and realized that he
Speaker 1: was in fact correct, that he wasn't an Uber driver,
Speaker 1: and I wasn't mean to be in his car. So look,
Speaker 1: that was very degrading, and I'm sorry for tarnishing the
Speaker 1: image of Cafe Night. I am really, really sorry, Jane Turner.
Speaker 1: I think that would be the first time I've been
Speaker 1: fairly kicked out of an Uber, because you know, I
Speaker 1: get kicked out all the time because I'm a drag queen.
Speaker 2: They freak out.
Speaker 1: But I got kicked out of an Uber and it
Speaker 1: wasn't even an Uber, and look, I will have to
Speaker 1: apologize it did just describe and say what the model
Speaker 1: and make of the car is. But I'm a gay person,
Speaker 1: so if you expect me to understand what a Toyota
Speaker 1: camera is versus a hold on something like that, I
Speaker 1: don't even know what the symbols are, so of course
Speaker 1: I got confused. Anyways, that's what I've been up to,
Speaker 1: a carjacking people's car. So I hope you got some
Speaker 1: joy out of that, because I am still a bit scarred.
Speaker 2: Artifacts.
Speaker 1: Okay, it's time for artifacts, which is show and tell
Speaker 1: for big kids, and today I have brought in a
Speaker 1: haunted wig to tell a story about for everyone here today,
Speaker 1: and I'm very excited. Let's take you back to a
Speaker 1: recent occurrence that happened, which was unfortunately the passing of
Speaker 1: Jitterly Cally and Tay, who is a star of stage
Speaker 1: and screen. You may know her from RuPaul's Drag Race,
Speaker 1: you may know her from Pose, you may know her
Speaker 1: from a stage near you, very very iconic and fun
Speaker 1: and fabulous person who for a lot of us queer people,
Speaker 1: we grew up watching her on drag Race and seeing
Speaker 1: her shine and seeing her faux pas as well.
Speaker 2: We know that she.
Speaker 1: Really couldn't pull together out if her position in a
Speaker 1: competition depended on it, and I can relate to that.
Speaker 2: But yeah, we unfortunately lost her. But what it reminded
Speaker 2: me of was that I was very fortunate to tour
Speaker 2: with her across Europe. We lived in a tour bus together.
Speaker 2: It was very, very fun. It was my first ever
Speaker 2: international tour. I was green as they come, and she
Speaker 2: was a very very wonderful person to work with and
Speaker 2: kind of took me under it wing and was really
Speaker 2: really really nice. And we got to the end of
Speaker 2: this tour and it was a Halloween theme tour, but
Speaker 2: it was in like March, don't ask, don't go there,
Speaker 2: so she we all had like, you know, we're a
Speaker 2: Halloween esque so for her Halloween meant that she was
Speaker 2: going to dress as Jasmine from Aladdin. And she got
Speaker 2: to the end of the tour and she had this
Speaker 2: hair piece which I brought in for everyone here today.
Speaker 2: It's this beautiful black wig with these bejeweled i'd say,
Speaker 2: like clips that go through it.
Speaker 1: They look like little bracelets for ants, but not unlike,
Speaker 1: of course Jasmine's ponytail from the cartoon. She is looking
Speaker 1: a bit worse for wear. I will look, it looks
Speaker 1: like I strangled Hagrid and put some crystals through his beard.
Speaker 1: And I'm really sorry, but it wasn't a lot better
Speaker 1: nick when it was in the bind. So but I
Speaker 1: think that it's actually getting scragglier because Jiggilye is haunting
Speaker 1: it and that's her souldest now the compossessed. No, it
Speaker 1: does look like a ball of pubes. I'm sorry, but
Speaker 1: very very beautiful. And she pulled this off out of
Speaker 1: off the back of her head and threw it in
Speaker 1: the beam and I looked at it. I was like,
Speaker 1: what are you doing? Like why are you throwing this
Speaker 1: in the beach, And she's like, I don't need it anymore.
Speaker 1: I looked at this wig that had only been used
Speaker 1: on this tour and still with the She didn't even
Speaker 1: pull out the badazzled like jewels and things. She just
Speaker 1: napped in the bin it goes and I said, take that,
Speaker 1: and she looked at me and she's like, okay, I guess.
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, thank you. You know, And this
Speaker 1: is a natural process for me because I am a collector.
Speaker 1: I will collect anything and everything. I am a complete
Speaker 1: magpie of drag, whether it's dolls or whether it's drag paraphernalia,
Speaker 1: or whether it's movies or horror items or collecting calories.
Speaker 1: So I'm very grateful I did in that moment because
Speaker 1: I now have this haunted Jiggly Cally and tape wig.
Speaker 1: When I got it home, I pinned it up on
Speaker 1: the wall in my office and sent her a picture.
Speaker 1: And I don't think she thought I was any more
Speaker 1: sane than what she thought on the tour. I do
Speaker 1: have another story that I wish I could tell you
Speaker 1: about Jiggily CALLI and te that happened. But the only
Speaker 1: thing I'll say is when you go on a tour bus,
Speaker 1: the first thing they tell you, because you're living on
Speaker 1: this bus for a couple of weeks, do not take
Speaker 1: a dump on the tour bus. It's for number ones only,
Speaker 1: not number two's. And all I can say is that
Speaker 1: I went down to do a number one halfway through
Speaker 1: one of the evenings. I got out of my coffin
Speaker 1: of a bunk and someone had forgotten to lock the door,
Speaker 1: and I saw no name person can't say who squatting
Speaker 1: over a toilet seat doing a number two in a
Speaker 1: garbage bag so she could throw it out Because you
Speaker 1: can't clog up the toilet.
Speaker 2: Yeah, probably bleep all of that out anyway.
Speaker 1: I encourage everyone to collect drag droppings, haunt wigs, and
Speaker 1: don't dump on a bus.
Speaker 2: Concealed weapons.
Speaker 1: Welcome to concealed weapons, where you get hacks from a hack.
Speaker 1: And this week this one's from me. You sometimes certain
Speaker 1: know what to say in a sexual circumstance. Are you
Speaker 1: bad at lying? Are you bad at you know someone
Speaker 1: comes to you and they go, oh, do you like
Speaker 1: my dress? And you know you don't want to hurt
Speaker 1: their feelings or you know, point out that they look
Speaker 1: incredibly hideous. Well, I've got the tip for you. All
Speaker 1: you need to say are these three words, and it
Speaker 1: works every time. I'm telling you, I have used this
Speaker 1: for my entire career, and I apologize to anyone that
Speaker 1: has had these words.
Speaker 2: Come out of my mouth. Now look at you, that's
Speaker 2: all you say.
Speaker 1: You say, look at you, and instead of them going
Speaker 1: oh oh, they go yes, look at me because they
Speaker 1: think they look amazing. And you can use it in
Speaker 1: any circumstance. And you don't know, I don't know what
Speaker 1: to say. Someone goes, oh no, the world's ending, look
Speaker 1: at you, and they look at themselves and they go, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's fun. They go, oh, no, my car, I just
Speaker 1: crushed my car. Look at you and they go, oh,
Speaker 1: go'stop it.
Speaker 2: Look at me.
Speaker 1: It's really great for deflecting anything. It's really great for
Speaker 1: you just feeling any silence. It is the ultimate form
Speaker 1: of phrase, and I encourage anyone to use it whenever
Speaker 1: they feel appropriate.
Speaker 2: Try it today.
Speaker 1: Put it into a sentence. Someone comes you at work
Speaker 1: at lunch and says, do you want to taste this?
Speaker 1: I bake this for the room, And you taste it
Speaker 1: and you go, oh, it's not very good.
Speaker 2: You go look at you.
Speaker 1: I feel so proud because they baked and hopefully didn't
Speaker 1: use mushrooms and a dehydrader.
Speaker 2: That's all I'm going to say.
Speaker 1: But anyway, feel free to use look at you whenever
Speaker 1: you are in a social circumstance that you feel uncomfortable,
Speaker 1: don't know what to say, or want to make someone
Speaker 1: feel good even though they should really be feeling bad.
Speaker 1: Arts advice. It's advice from me, all right, It's time
Speaker 1: for arts advice. Where you ask a question, I'll give
Speaker 1: you some advice, even though it may not be the
Speaker 1: advice you're looking for.
Speaker 3: I have a question around social media etiquette. I've met
Speaker 3: a friend of a friend a couple of times, but
Speaker 3: I wouldn't consider as friends or someone that i'd even
Speaker 3: want to be friends with. Really really hung out with
Speaker 3: her because I had to. She's just started following me
Speaker 3: on Instagram, and I don't want to follow her back.
Speaker 3: But I have a private Instagram, so she'll see that
Speaker 3: I've accepted her request and then realize I didn't follow
Speaker 3: her back. What should I do? What are the rules
Speaker 3: around social media etiquette?
Speaker 1: Don't follow her back? Don't pollute your timeline with bullshit
Speaker 1: that you don't need to see. Don't I don't care
Speaker 1: about the pleasantries anymore. Your time is sacred, Your timeline
Speaker 1: is sacred, and who cares about her feelings? If it
Speaker 1: was Facebook, you have to accept go for it. But
Speaker 1: that's because no one uses Facebook and no one cares.
Speaker 1: But your Instagram timeline is so so sacred. And also
Speaker 1: I don't want to be rude, But don't be so
Speaker 1: up yourself that you think she's like looking up to
Speaker 1: see whether you follow her back, because she probably isn't.
Speaker 1: I recently had a situation that happened with a man
Speaker 1: friend that I have been seeing on and off for
Speaker 1: three years, and I got a text from him literally
Speaker 1: like two weeks ago, and he goes, this is really embarrassing,
Speaker 1: but I have to follow you on Instagram now because
Speaker 1: I accidentally unfollowed you three years ago and you obviously
Speaker 1: didn't notice. And if you get a follow requests don't
Speaker 1: make it fit bad. So I didn't even notice. But
Speaker 1: the thing with him, though, is he replies to my
Speaker 1: stories but doesn't follow me well at the time, so
Speaker 1: he would have to be like searching my profile to
Speaker 1: keep up the illusion. Anyway, don't follow her. I don't care,
Speaker 1: or make a fake account.
Speaker 2: I don't know. It depends how much you care about
Speaker 2: your timeline. But I wouldn't bother about it.
Speaker 1: So hopefully I've given you the advice that you secretly wanted,
Speaker 1: which I think you did. That's the tone of that,
Speaker 1: that you really just wanted someone to confirm that. Don't
Speaker 1: follow her, and who knows. Maybe you'll become friends. It
Speaker 1: doesn't sound like you will, And don't worry because when
Speaker 1: you see each other in person, just be like, I
Speaker 1: don't follow you because I don't like you. Maybe that'll
Speaker 1: work for you. No, No, no, no, really, just don't
Speaker 1: acknowledge anything. If there's one thing that I know is
Speaker 1: if you don't acknowledge it, you can ignore it and
Speaker 1: pretend it doesn't happen, and then you don't have to
Speaker 1: feel uncomfortable in any social circumstances. Be oblivious to the world.
Speaker 1: No one cares unless you're genuinely interested. Then go follow
Speaker 1: her and leave her hate comments. Now, if you have
Speaker 1: any questions that you need advice to make sure you
Speaker 1: jump onto the socials or in the show notes and
Speaker 1: send it an email or a voice note, and I
Speaker 1: will give you my unsolicited and extremely helpful advice free
Speaker 1: of charge. I'm that generous. Well, that has been this
Speaker 1: week's palette cleanser. Thank you so much for joining me here.
Speaker 1: Now don't forget. Next week we have a regular episode
Speaker 1: of Concealed with a special guest who is Mark. And
Speaker 1: the most interesting thing that I can say about him
Speaker 1: is that he is a straight man. Yes, I'm risking
Speaker 1: my life and I'm going to be in the studio
Speaker 1: with a straight man straighty one eighty who is concealing
Speaker 1: something that involves Samuel L.
Speaker 2: Jackson, Who's that I don't know. I don't forget to
Speaker 2: send in your most notes.
Speaker 1: If you want to jump on the soapbox, or if
Speaker 1: you want some art advice, we're here. My podcast is
Speaker 1: for you and you guys only, so we'll see you
Speaker 1: next week. My name is Artsimone and you are fabulous. Goodbye,