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Speaker 1: Hello, it's art Zimone here and welcome back to the

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Speaker 1: Palate Cleanser. And what have I been up to this week? Well,

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Speaker 1: I recently carjack someone while I.

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Speaker 2: Was dressed as Cafday Night.

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Speaker 1: I thought I'd catch up with you and tell you

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Speaker 1: about what I've been up to recently, which was a

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Speaker 1: moment that I'm not very proud of, and I was

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Speaker 1: very embarrassed at the time and I can look back

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Speaker 1: on it and.

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Speaker 2: Laugh at it now.

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Speaker 1: But recently I was in Sydney doing our Fountlakes in

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Speaker 1: Lockdown show. He had a return season there went splendidly,

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Speaker 1: thanks for asking everyone. But while I was there, I

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Speaker 1: had to go and do a bit of press. I'd

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Speaker 1: go out to another radio station. Can't say the name

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Speaker 1: here because you know, conflict of interest, Triple J. Anyway,

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Speaker 1: so I was at Triple J at the ABC studios

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Speaker 1: in Sydney and I did a Love Drive Time Live

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Speaker 1: cross and I was dressed as Cat Day Night at

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Speaker 1: the time because the interview was just before we had

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Speaker 1: our show for the evening. So I was like, look,

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Speaker 1: I'll do it in full drag, Cat drag, you know.

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Speaker 1: So I had my perm on, I had my knitche

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Speaker 1: to walk about one bat jumper, a nice Jenny Flatt,

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Speaker 1: and a white caperri from Miller's. So I was feeling

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Speaker 1: ultra glamorous and I had to get an uber back

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Speaker 1: to the theater and I ordered the uber and a

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Speaker 1: car drives up and it says my car's there, and

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Speaker 1: the number plate was like one XF, and I was like, perfect,

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Speaker 1: I looked one XF. So my wave with the guy

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Speaker 1: in the car gives me this look. But I'm used

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Speaker 1: to catching ubers in drag all the time and I

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Speaker 1: always get this look. Like every single time, I get

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Speaker 1: this weird like oh, like they're always scared that there's

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Speaker 1: a drag queen.

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Speaker 2: So I was like, oh, well this checks out. Yes. Hello.

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Speaker 1: So I just opened the door after waving at this

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Speaker 1: man and he still looks a bit confused. I'm like hi, yep,

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Speaker 1: and he's like no, no, no, no no, And I

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Speaker 1: was like ha ha ha ha ha because this happens

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Speaker 1: to me in ubers all the time.

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Speaker 2: They freak out because they're.

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Speaker 1: Like, oh, do a queen all so scary and he's

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Speaker 1: like no, no, no, no no no, And I was like, no,

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Speaker 1: that's me, yes, yes, that's me, and He's like no, no, no,

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Speaker 1: no no, and I'm looking at him to be confused

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Speaker 1: because I'm cathay Night and he's not clearly enjoying the experience.

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Speaker 1: And I sit in the back seat and he's like, no, no,

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Speaker 1: no no. I was like Uber Uber for art, and

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Speaker 1: he's like, no, I'm not an Uber driver.

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Speaker 3: And I.

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Speaker 1: Had to quickly step out of that car and apologize

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Speaker 1: profusely while just as cathday Night and look across the

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Speaker 1: car lot and there there is another car with exactly

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Speaker 1: the first three letters and numbers as the number plate

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Speaker 1: that I had just got into, and realized that he

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Speaker 1: was in fact correct, that he wasn't an Uber driver,

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Speaker 1: and I wasn't mean to be in his car. So look,

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Speaker 1: that was very degrading, and I'm sorry for tarnishing the

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Speaker 1: image of Cafe Night. I am really, really sorry, Jane Turner.

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Speaker 1: I think that would be the first time I've been

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Speaker 1: fairly kicked out of an Uber, because you know, I

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Speaker 1: get kicked out all the time because I'm a drag queen.

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Speaker 2: They freak out.

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Speaker 1: But I got kicked out of an Uber and it

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Speaker 1: wasn't even an Uber, and look, I will have to

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Speaker 1: apologize it did just describe and say what the model

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Speaker 1: and make of the car is. But I'm a gay person,

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Speaker 1: so if you expect me to understand what a Toyota

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Speaker 1: camera is versus a hold on something like that, I

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Speaker 1: don't even know what the symbols are, so of course

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Speaker 1: I got confused. Anyways, that's what I've been up to,

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Speaker 1: a carjacking people's car. So I hope you got some

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Speaker 1: joy out of that, because I am still a bit scarred.

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Speaker 2: Artifacts.

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Speaker 1: Okay, it's time for artifacts, which is show and tell

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Speaker 1: for big kids, and today I have brought in a

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Speaker 1: haunted wig to tell a story about for everyone here today,

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Speaker 1: and I'm very excited. Let's take you back to a

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Speaker 1: recent occurrence that happened, which was unfortunately the passing of

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Speaker 1: Jitterly Cally and Tay, who is a star of stage

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Speaker 1: and screen. You may know her from RuPaul's Drag Race,

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Speaker 1: you may know her from Pose, you may know her

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Speaker 1: from a stage near you, very very iconic and fun

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Speaker 1: and fabulous person who for a lot of us queer people,

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Speaker 1: we grew up watching her on drag Race and seeing

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Speaker 1: her shine and seeing her faux pas as well.

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Speaker 2: We know that she.

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Speaker 1: Really couldn't pull together out if her position in a

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Speaker 1: competition depended on it, and I can relate to that.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, we unfortunately lost her. But what it reminded

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Speaker 2: me of was that I was very fortunate to tour

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Speaker 2: with her across Europe. We lived in a tour bus together.

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Speaker 2: It was very, very fun. It was my first ever

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Speaker 2: international tour. I was green as they come, and she

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Speaker 2: was a very very wonderful person to work with and

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Speaker 2: kind of took me under it wing and was really

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Speaker 2: really really nice. And we got to the end of

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Speaker 2: this tour and it was a Halloween theme tour, but

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Speaker 2: it was in like March, don't ask, don't go there,

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Speaker 2: so she we all had like, you know, we're a

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Speaker 2: Halloween esque so for her Halloween meant that she was

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Speaker 2: going to dress as Jasmine from Aladdin. And she got

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Speaker 2: to the end of the tour and she had this

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Speaker 2: hair piece which I brought in for everyone here today.

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Speaker 2: It's this beautiful black wig with these bejeweled i'd say,

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Speaker 2: like clips that go through it.

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Speaker 1: They look like little bracelets for ants, but not unlike,

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Speaker 1: of course Jasmine's ponytail from the cartoon. She is looking

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Speaker 1: a bit worse for wear. I will look, it looks

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Speaker 1: like I strangled Hagrid and put some crystals through his beard.

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Speaker 1: And I'm really sorry, but it wasn't a lot better

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Speaker 1: nick when it was in the bind. So but I

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Speaker 1: think that it's actually getting scragglier because Jiggilye is haunting

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Speaker 1: it and that's her souldest now the compossessed. No, it

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Speaker 1: does look like a ball of pubes. I'm sorry, but

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Speaker 1: very very beautiful. And she pulled this off out of

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Speaker 1: off the back of her head and threw it in

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Speaker 1: the beam and I looked at it. I was like,

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Speaker 1: what are you doing? Like why are you throwing this

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Speaker 1: in the beach, And she's like, I don't need it anymore.

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Speaker 1: I looked at this wig that had only been used

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Speaker 1: on this tour and still with the She didn't even

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Speaker 1: pull out the badazzled like jewels and things. She just

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Speaker 1: napped in the bin it goes and I said, take that,

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Speaker 1: and she looked at me and she's like, okay, I guess.

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh, thank you. You know, And this

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Speaker 1: is a natural process for me because I am a collector.

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Speaker 1: I will collect anything and everything. I am a complete

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Speaker 1: magpie of drag, whether it's dolls or whether it's drag paraphernalia,

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Speaker 1: or whether it's movies or horror items or collecting calories.

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Speaker 1: So I'm very grateful I did in that moment because

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Speaker 1: I now have this haunted Jiggly Cally and tape wig.

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Speaker 1: When I got it home, I pinned it up on

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Speaker 1: the wall in my office and sent her a picture.

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Speaker 1: And I don't think she thought I was any more

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Speaker 1: sane than what she thought on the tour. I do

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Speaker 1: have another story that I wish I could tell you

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Speaker 1: about Jiggily CALLI and te that happened. But the only

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Speaker 1: thing I'll say is when you go on a tour bus,

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Speaker 1: the first thing they tell you, because you're living on

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Speaker 1: this bus for a couple of weeks, do not take

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Speaker 1: a dump on the tour bus. It's for number ones only,

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Speaker 1: not number two's. And all I can say is that

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Speaker 1: I went down to do a number one halfway through

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Speaker 1: one of the evenings. I got out of my coffin

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Speaker 1: of a bunk and someone had forgotten to lock the door,

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Speaker 1: and I saw no name person can't say who squatting

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Speaker 1: over a toilet seat doing a number two in a

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Speaker 1: garbage bag so she could throw it out Because you

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Speaker 1: can't clog up the toilet.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, probably bleep all of that out anyway.

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Speaker 1: I encourage everyone to collect drag droppings, haunt wigs, and

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Speaker 1: don't dump on a bus.

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Speaker 2: Concealed weapons.

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Speaker 1: Welcome to concealed weapons, where you get hacks from a hack.

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Speaker 1: And this week this one's from me. You sometimes certain

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Speaker 1: know what to say in a sexual circumstance. Are you

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Speaker 1: bad at lying? Are you bad at you know someone

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Speaker 1: comes to you and they go, oh, do you like

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Speaker 1: my dress? And you know you don't want to hurt

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Speaker 1: their feelings or you know, point out that they look

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Speaker 1: incredibly hideous. Well, I've got the tip for you. All

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Speaker 1: you need to say are these three words, and it

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Speaker 1: works every time. I'm telling you, I have used this

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Speaker 1: for my entire career, and I apologize to anyone that

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Speaker 1: has had these words.

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Speaker 2: Come out of my mouth. Now look at you, that's

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Speaker 2: all you say.

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Speaker 1: You say, look at you, and instead of them going

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Speaker 1: oh oh, they go yes, look at me because they

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Speaker 1: think they look amazing. And you can use it in

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Speaker 1: any circumstance. And you don't know, I don't know what

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Speaker 1: to say. Someone goes, oh no, the world's ending, look

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Speaker 1: at you, and they look at themselves and they go, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's fun. They go, oh, no, my car, I just

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Speaker 1: crushed my car. Look at you and they go, oh,

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Speaker 1: go'stop it.

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Speaker 2: Look at me.

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Speaker 1: It's really great for deflecting anything. It's really great for

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Speaker 1: you just feeling any silence. It is the ultimate form

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Speaker 1: of phrase, and I encourage anyone to use it whenever

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Speaker 1: they feel appropriate.

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Speaker 2: Try it today.

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Speaker 1: Put it into a sentence. Someone comes you at work

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Speaker 1: at lunch and says, do you want to taste this?

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Speaker 1: I bake this for the room, And you taste it

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Speaker 1: and you go, oh, it's not very good.

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Speaker 2: You go look at you.

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Speaker 1: I feel so proud because they baked and hopefully didn't

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Speaker 1: use mushrooms and a dehydrader.

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Speaker 2: That's all I'm going to say.

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Speaker 1: But anyway, feel free to use look at you whenever

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Speaker 1: you are in a social circumstance that you feel uncomfortable,

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Speaker 1: don't know what to say, or want to make someone

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Speaker 1: feel good even though they should really be feeling bad.

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Speaker 1: Arts advice. It's advice from me, all right, It's time

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Speaker 1: for arts advice. Where you ask a question, I'll give

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Speaker 1: you some advice, even though it may not be the

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Speaker 1: advice you're looking for.

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Speaker 3: I have a question around social media etiquette. I've met

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Speaker 3: a friend of a friend a couple of times, but

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Speaker 3: I wouldn't consider as friends or someone that i'd even

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Speaker 3: want to be friends with. Really really hung out with

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Speaker 3: her because I had to. She's just started following me

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Speaker 3: on Instagram, and I don't want to follow her back.

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Speaker 3: But I have a private Instagram, so she'll see that

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Speaker 3: I've accepted her request and then realize I didn't follow

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Speaker 3: her back. What should I do? What are the rules

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Speaker 3: around social media etiquette?

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Speaker 1: Don't follow her back? Don't pollute your timeline with bullshit

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Speaker 1: that you don't need to see. Don't I don't care

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Speaker 1: about the pleasantries anymore. Your time is sacred, Your timeline

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Speaker 1: is sacred, and who cares about her feelings? If it

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Speaker 1: was Facebook, you have to accept go for it. But

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Speaker 1: that's because no one uses Facebook and no one cares.

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Speaker 1: But your Instagram timeline is so so sacred. And also

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Speaker 1: I don't want to be rude, But don't be so

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Speaker 1: up yourself that you think she's like looking up to

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Speaker 1: see whether you follow her back, because she probably isn't.

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Speaker 1: I recently had a situation that happened with a man

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Speaker 1: friend that I have been seeing on and off for

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Speaker 1: three years, and I got a text from him literally

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Speaker 1: like two weeks ago, and he goes, this is really embarrassing,

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Speaker 1: but I have to follow you on Instagram now because

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Speaker 1: I accidentally unfollowed you three years ago and you obviously

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Speaker 1: didn't notice. And if you get a follow requests don't

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Speaker 1: make it fit bad. So I didn't even notice. But

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Speaker 1: the thing with him, though, is he replies to my

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Speaker 1: stories but doesn't follow me well at the time, so

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Speaker 1: he would have to be like searching my profile to

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Speaker 1: keep up the illusion. Anyway, don't follow her. I don't care,

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Speaker 1: or make a fake account.

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Speaker 2: I don't know. It depends how much you care about

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Speaker 2: your timeline. But I wouldn't bother about it.

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Speaker 1: So hopefully I've given you the advice that you secretly wanted,

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Speaker 1: which I think you did. That's the tone of that,

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Speaker 1: that you really just wanted someone to confirm that. Don't

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Speaker 1: follow her, and who knows. Maybe you'll become friends. It

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Speaker 1: doesn't sound like you will, And don't worry because when

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Speaker 1: you see each other in person, just be like, I

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Speaker 1: don't follow you because I don't like you. Maybe that'll

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Speaker 1: work for you. No, No, no, no, really, just don't

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Speaker 1: acknowledge anything. If there's one thing that I know is

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Speaker 1: if you don't acknowledge it, you can ignore it and

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Speaker 1: pretend it doesn't happen, and then you don't have to

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Speaker 1: feel uncomfortable in any social circumstances. Be oblivious to the world.

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Speaker 1: No one cares unless you're genuinely interested. Then go follow

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Speaker 1: her and leave her hate comments. Now, if you have

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Speaker 1: any questions that you need advice to make sure you

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Speaker 1: jump onto the socials or in the show notes and

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Speaker 1: send it an email or a voice note, and I

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Speaker 1: will give you my unsolicited and extremely helpful advice free

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Speaker 1: of charge. I'm that generous. Well, that has been this

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Speaker 1: week's palette cleanser. Thank you so much for joining me here.

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Speaker 1: Now don't forget. Next week we have a regular episode

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Speaker 1: of Concealed with a special guest who is Mark. And

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Speaker 1: the most interesting thing that I can say about him

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Speaker 1: is that he is a straight man. Yes, I'm risking

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Speaker 1: my life and I'm going to be in the studio

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Speaker 1: with a straight man straighty one eighty who is concealing

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Speaker 1: something that involves Samuel L.

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Speaker 2: Jackson, Who's that I don't know. I don't forget to

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Speaker 2: send in your most notes.

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Speaker 1: If you want to jump on the soapbox, or if

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Speaker 1: you want some art advice, we're here. My podcast is

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Speaker 1: for you and you guys only, so we'll see you

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Speaker 1: next week. My name is Artsimone and you are fabulous. Goodbye,