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Speaker 1: Now. The reason that I the reason that I thought

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Speaker 1: more about this, I was listening to if you listen

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Speaker 1: to our show, we have The Imperfects Boys on. We

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Speaker 1: have Hugh Van Coleenberg, Josh Van Collenberg, and Ryan Shelton

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Speaker 1: in the studio every couple of weeks in twenty twenty three.

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Speaker 1: It's it's awesome to have them in the studio and

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Speaker 1: their podcast is wonderful for listening to really in depth chats,

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Speaker 1: and they had possibly one of my top five favorite

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Speaker 1: speakers in the world on The Imperfect a woman by

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Speaker 1: the name of Esther Perell. She's Belgian. I'm pretty sure

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Speaker 1: she is a phenomenal speaker on relationships. She's a psychotherapist.

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Speaker 1: She's probably, I'm going to say, the global authority on relationships.

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Speaker 1: And she speaks in this episode about how she used

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Speaker 1: to work with people in their marriage vows and what

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Speaker 1: she had to say here leads me to why I, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I got some big suspicions about Valentine's Day wows.

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Speaker 2: These days, it's about many things people promise that are

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Speaker 2: the loftier the better, And I thought that one of

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Speaker 2: the most realistic vowels and best funny lines actually for

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Speaker 2: a vows we'd be to say, I promise that I'm

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Speaker 2: going to pick up on a regular basis, and on

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Speaker 2: occasion I'll apologize about it. So now when you bless

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Speaker 2: it becomes a real surprise and you can really delight

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Speaker 2: in it because it says I'm going to do all

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Speaker 2: kinds of things that are going to be really upsetting,

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Speaker 2: and I'm going to try to own them as best

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Speaker 2: I can. You know, because that lets the other person

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Speaker 2: know that you care about them, that you see them,

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Speaker 2: that you see what you do to them, and that

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Speaker 2: you're taking responsibility for trying to change it. That goes

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Speaker 2: a long way in a relationship.

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Speaker 3: Nice esther Pridge, she's good, isn't you amazing? Yeah, because

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Speaker 3: it's so true.

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Speaker 1: She's just said yeah, And I think it kind of

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Speaker 1: goes to the same point. So like, why would you

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Speaker 1: get up on a wedding day and just say all

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Speaker 1: this stuff about your relationship which is not true. Why

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Speaker 1: not just be really real about your relationship and say, hey,

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Speaker 1: I'm going to make a lot of errors. Things are

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Speaker 1: going to get really messy, and sometimes I might not

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Speaker 1: apologize for them, and then in that moment you're instantly

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Speaker 1: accountable for that