Speaker 1: Fast Ask One part is a bit of a fan
Speaker 1: favorite here at the Pickup and something that Laura and
Speaker 1: I do on our podcast Life Uncut. Every single week,
Speaker 1: you guys write in, or call up, or text into
Speaker 1: the line your predicaments of the week. We do our
Speaker 1: best to answer them. Today we have one that we
Speaker 1: haven't had before. Sam is having some issues with her
Speaker 1: boss at work, making it feel very uncomfortable.
Speaker 2: Hi, Samy, talk to us. What's going on?
Speaker 3: Okay? So, I'm an executive assistant in an office type
Speaker 3: environment to a male boss. And as time's gone on
Speaker 3: over the last nine months that I've been in this role,
Speaker 3: he's just getting a little bit more flirtatious, a little
Speaker 3: bit more perhaps out of line with his comments. And
Speaker 3: it's just I just don't know what I should do
Speaker 3: because I'm nervous of losing my own job.
Speaker 4: I guess is it your direct boss?
Speaker 3: Yes? Correct? Money?
Speaker 4: Do you have HR in the company, Like, is it
Speaker 4: a big enough company that there's other people that you
Speaker 4: can too about this as well? Or is it a
Speaker 4: really small company wreck? Kind of nice? It's tricky.
Speaker 3: It's a really big company. So we do have HR.
Speaker 3: I guess he just hasn't done anything that completely crosses
Speaker 3: the boundary that makes me question, if I go to
Speaker 3: hr am, I just putting myself in a horrible position
Speaker 3: of not getting like promoted or anything along those lines.
Speaker 1: Well, what's doing?
Speaker 2: Yes, Sam, Like, if you don't mind us asking what
Speaker 2: are the kinds of things that he's doing on a
Speaker 2: daily basis?
Speaker 3: Okay, so just comments of like oh, I mean general
Speaker 3: comments of you look nice today, or I really like
Speaker 3: that skirt, or you know, just comments about what I'm
Speaker 3: wearing or how I'm dressed is the first one. But
Speaker 3: then he does go another step at times where he'll
Speaker 3: ask about my weekend and say things like, so where
Speaker 3: did you finish the night? Oh, I would have loved
Speaker 3: to have been there, And that's.
Speaker 4: That's yeah, And I reckon. I mean, I don't know
Speaker 4: how you feel comfortable addressing this situation, but I think
Speaker 4: sometimes the best way and the best course of action
Speaker 4: is saying it in the moment. Like if he says
Speaker 4: makes that comment, oh, I would have liked to have
Speaker 4: been there, just be like, oh, that makes me feel
Speaker 4: pretty uncomfortable when you say that. And the thing is
Speaker 4: is that the more that he says these things and
Speaker 4: gets away with it. The more that he starts to
Speaker 4: think you're okay with it when you're absolutely not testing
Speaker 4: the water. Yeah, and then he's pushing the envelope a
Speaker 4: little bit further. And I'm so sorry you're in this position,
Speaker 4: because you shouldn't go to work and have to be
Speaker 4: made to feel uncomfortable by anyone. But I do think
Speaker 4: that if you don't say something, you're either going to
Speaker 4: get to a place where it's gone on for so
Speaker 4: long that you don't know how to manage it, or
Speaker 4: it's going to turn into such a big thing that
Speaker 4: you feel really uncomfortable in your own workplace.
Speaker 2: Yeah. And also I would say, if I understand, and
Speaker 2: I know why, you don't want it to become a
Speaker 2: public issue and you don't want him to be aware
Speaker 2: of it, at least let hr know. So then if
Speaker 2: one day it does progress to a point where you're
Speaker 2: extremely uncomfortable, there's a paper trail and it's not you know,
Speaker 2: boy who gribe wolf, which unfortunately is what happens in
Speaker 2: these big workplaces, especially when you're working with executives.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean, look, I mean, talking from my own experience,
Speaker 4: I had a really uncomfortable I mean more than uncomfortable.
Speaker 4: I had a real like so harassment situation happened with
Speaker 4: me when I was in my twenties and I was
Speaker 4: too young, and I also didn't know how to handle it.
Speaker 4: And I look back on that time in my life
Speaker 4: and if I had addressed it sooner, I know it
Speaker 4: could have been managed. But it just it was the
Speaker 4: type of thing that the longer I left it, the
Speaker 4: worse the situation got for myself.
Speaker 2: Oh I'm sorry, Law's And what now is you're older,
Speaker 2: you look back and you think would you have done
Speaker 2: it differently?
Speaker 4: Yeah, at the time, one hundred percent. At the time,
Speaker 4: I think I was like, oh, you know, he'd had
Speaker 4: a few drinks, and like, I don't want to get
Speaker 4: him into trouble, and I think I had a lot
Speaker 4: of not compassion for him, but I kind of didn't
Speaker 4: want to make a big deal out of something that
Speaker 4: maybe would go away. And then a year later, I
Speaker 4: was still dealing with the same thing and I ended
Speaker 4: up quitting my job because of his actions, which is
Speaker 4: crazy when I think about it now, But I was
Speaker 4: twenty two and I didn't know what to do.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And you definitely shouldn't have to leave your job
Speaker 1: because you're uncomfortable, Sam. The only other thing I would
Speaker 1: say here is you said at the start he hasn't
Speaker 1: crossed the line or done anything wrong to me. I
Speaker 1: think he has saying to you he wishes he was
Speaker 1: there when you wherever you ended your night. Is crossing
Speaker 1: a line, and it doesn't have to be physical. He's
Speaker 1: literally saying I wish I was physically with you where
Speaker 1: if you were. That's inappropriate.
Speaker 2: Let talk to HR.
Speaker 3: Okay, thank you, Thanks everyone.
Speaker 2: No worries.
Speaker 4: Sam.
Speaker 2: If you've got a question you need some help, if
Speaker 2: you can head to the pickup dot com DOTU and
Speaker 2: you can enter your question on the wind page and
Speaker 2: we'll get in touch. Just sucks, it does hey. Next,
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Speaker 2: seven hours until you are finally rescued. That is a
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Speaker 2: And this rescue story, I can't wait for the day
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