WEBVTT - FULL SHOW: A dating app with NO pictures? 0:00:10.379 --> 0:00:14.219 My Heart podcasts, hear more Kiss podcast playlist, and listen 0:00:14.259 --> 0:00:16.099 live on the Free iHeart app. 0:00:18.339 --> 0:00:22.218 A pickup with Britt Hockley and Laura Burn. 0:00:22.619 --> 0:00:26.618 Brady, your work, our windows down, that's my world. 0:00:26.659 --> 0:00:29.619 Reason the dust only good, bab Doug all down. 0:00:30.619 --> 0:00:33.459 I don't much, but yeah I'm not. 0:00:33.899 --> 0:00:35.659 I'll big get and what I want. 0:00:35.939 --> 0:00:37.619 It don't matter where done. 0:00:37.699 --> 0:00:40.619 This is the pickup, Hi, guys, It's the pick up 0:00:40.659 --> 0:00:42.299 with Britt Hockley and Laura Burn. 0:00:42.659 --> 0:00:44.739 And it's the end of the week already. Is this 0:00:44.819 --> 0:00:46.299 literally the shortest week of the year. 0:00:46.339 --> 0:00:47.019 I think it is. 0:00:47.259 --> 0:00:50.059 Hi for anyone who didn't take these like three days off, 0:00:50.379 --> 0:00:51.539 I feel like we're all chumps. 0:00:51.539 --> 0:00:53.219 I say this because I am also a chump. We 0:00:53.219 --> 0:00:54.139 are also at work. 0:00:54.419 --> 0:00:58.179 But this long weekend holiday Easter Holiday into end Zac Holiday, 0:00:58.179 --> 0:01:00.259 it feels like it's the holiday that never ended. And 0:01:00.339 --> 0:01:02.579 some kids are in school holidays and some kids are 0:01:02.579 --> 0:01:05.139 back at school. I just think, like, just take it off. 0:01:05.379 --> 0:01:08.938 I love the idea that we've bookended public holiday, but 0:01:09.059 --> 0:01:11.898 it does feel unnecessary to come back for three days. 0:01:11.979 --> 0:01:13.539 I think a lot of people are calling in sick. 0:01:13.578 --> 0:01:15.139 I think a lot of people go to their bosses 0:01:15.419 --> 0:01:17.738 and say, hey, can I book annually? Their bosses say 0:01:17.859 --> 0:01:19.578 that chance, and they're like, cool, I'm going to call 0:01:19.619 --> 0:01:21.018 in sick. Anyway, we may as. 0:01:20.938 --> 0:01:23.018 Well make it a week long holidays. 0:01:23.018 --> 0:01:25.539 Those three days are the smartest three days to take 0:01:25.578 --> 0:01:29.298 your annual holidays in. Like, surely bosses are not rejecting 0:01:29.339 --> 0:01:31.699 that type of holiday unless you've already taken heaps of it. 0:01:32.059 --> 0:01:33.899 Surely there are that many bosses out there that are 0:01:33.899 --> 0:01:35.859 rejecting those three days and saying no, you've got to 0:01:35.859 --> 0:01:36.219 come in. 0:01:36.458 --> 0:01:37.499 Someone has to work. 0:01:37.578 --> 0:01:40.139 Every employee can't come and ask for the same week off, 0:01:40.179 --> 0:01:41.378 then there's no one at work. 0:01:41.578 --> 0:01:43.298 That's true. 0:01:42.658 --> 0:01:45.938 I imagine if your people came, like at Tony May 0:01:46.059 --> 0:01:47.699 your shop, and they all came and said, well, it 0:01:47.699 --> 0:01:49.299 makes sense, give us the week off to you. 0:01:49.579 --> 0:01:51.579 Never a lot of them did, though a lot of 0:01:51.579 --> 0:01:53.499 them have taken off. But I think in those situations, 0:01:53.499 --> 0:01:55.739 it's a first in best dress. So if like half 0:01:55.779 --> 0:01:58.819 the officers or it was smart enough to get themselves organized, 0:01:59.019 --> 0:02:00.659 then I'm kind of like fair play game on. 0:02:00.739 --> 0:02:02.019 But not everyone can do it. 0:02:02.099 --> 0:02:04.219 So yeah, my heart goes out to all the people 0:02:04.219 --> 0:02:06.899 who worn't smart enough. Aka Brittany and I to ask 0:02:06.899 --> 0:02:08.819 for these three days off, and here we are now 0:02:08.859 --> 0:02:10.659 asking kind of something we do on life funk Up 0:02:10.699 --> 0:02:13.899 podcast every week where we answer You're deep, You're duck, 0:02:13.939 --> 0:02:15.819 and your burning questions. So if you have a dilemma, 0:02:16.219 --> 0:02:18.019 give us a call and you might get through. We 0:02:18.059 --> 0:02:20.499 have Sarah on the line, and Sarah is a mum 0:02:20.859 --> 0:02:23.219 who is having a little bit of trouble, not with 0:02:23.339 --> 0:02:25.339 the friend that she's made, but with the kids. 0:02:25.698 --> 0:02:26.819 Sarah, what's going on? 0:02:27.819 --> 0:02:31.978 Hi, girls, I've finally made a mum friend. Our little 0:02:32.219 --> 0:02:35.179 kids go to school together. We have the same interest, 0:02:35.258 --> 0:02:40.059 the same value in our parenting. However, unfortunately it's our 0:02:40.179 --> 0:02:43.739 younger children that when we get together, they just clash 0:02:43.779 --> 0:02:45.339 and they're just constantly fighting. 0:02:46.138 --> 0:02:48.779 So you are worried that you can't be friends, or 0:02:48.899 --> 0:02:51.579 you like, is it possibly? Like what's the what are 0:02:51.619 --> 0:02:52.939 you wanting to do with it? 0:02:53.978 --> 0:02:57.819 So we are friends, However, I just find that when 0:02:57.859 --> 0:03:00.099 we go to catch up, I'm like, oh, it's going 0:03:00.138 --> 0:03:04.019 to be a bit dousing. You know, likes constantly the 0:03:04.059 --> 0:03:04.858 younger ones apart. 0:03:05.138 --> 0:03:08.299 I feel for you, Sarah, because it's it's actually so hard, 0:03:08.698 --> 0:03:10.779 not only just like when you're a mum, and you're 0:03:10.779 --> 0:03:12.698 trying to find someone who parents in a similar way, 0:03:12.739 --> 0:03:15.939 has similar parenting values. I think a really big part 0:03:15.978 --> 0:03:17.979 of it being like enjoyable for the both of you 0:03:18.099 --> 0:03:19.578 is that your kids have to get along as well. 0:03:19.619 --> 0:03:22.699 Like it's so hard to find that magic mix. My 0:03:22.779 --> 0:03:24.499 thing is is like, of course you can be friends, 0:03:25.059 --> 0:03:28.139 but you might find the overtime the friendship becomes hard 0:03:28.258 --> 0:03:30.178 because the kids make it hard, do you know what 0:03:30.219 --> 0:03:30.499 I mean? 0:03:30.659 --> 0:03:33.298 But can you not be friends outside of the kids, 0:03:33.499 --> 0:03:35.619 like you, I don't know if you guys have supportive 0:03:35.659 --> 0:03:38.699 families or partners or babysitters, but you can definitely have 0:03:39.059 --> 0:03:42.458 adult friends where you meet them for an early dinner 0:03:42.699 --> 0:03:44.259 or a wine or like, it doesn't always have to 0:03:44.259 --> 0:03:45.699 be involved with the kid dates. 0:03:45.539 --> 0:03:48.019 Right, Yeah, maybe a mix of both. 0:03:48.419 --> 0:03:51.099 Yeah, I mean you can always do a mix. But 0:03:51.219 --> 0:03:53.099 but it's hard, brit Like, I mean, I know for me, 0:03:53.659 --> 0:03:55.979 with the friends that I have who are mums that 0:03:56.019 --> 0:03:58.899 we hang out and they've got kids similar age, you 0:03:58.939 --> 0:04:02.019 really want to find friends where your kids also get along, 0:04:02.059 --> 0:04:03.619 because it just means that they can run off and 0:04:03.619 --> 0:04:05.618 play and you actually get to have an adult conversation. 0:04:05.699 --> 0:04:08.179 Otherwise you spend the whole time catching up with this 0:04:08.219 --> 0:04:10.299 person that you want to hang out with, but you're 0:04:10.339 --> 0:04:12.259 just fighting fires because your kids are screaming at each 0:04:12.299 --> 0:04:15.699 other or having fired or like someone's breaking something like Okay, 0:04:15.779 --> 0:04:17.699 is it just like both kids in general are tricky 0:04:17.779 --> 0:04:19.459 or do you feel that there's like a one sided 0:04:19.499 --> 0:04:20.539 trickiness that's going on. 0:04:21.579 --> 0:04:24.339 I think they're just both similar personalities. So they're both 0:04:24.419 --> 0:04:26.659 like sort of stubborn, Whereas like my oldest son, he 0:04:26.659 --> 0:04:28.619 would normally give in and be like, Okay, you're gonna 0:04:28.619 --> 0:04:31.579 have the toy and my daughter, whereas my daughter's strong 0:04:31.659 --> 0:04:33.899 willed and she's at no way, I'm not giving into this. 0:04:34.179 --> 0:04:37.499 How old are they they're three. My daughter's three and 0:04:37.539 --> 0:04:39.819 her daughter's four, so a little bit of an age gap. 0:04:39.859 --> 0:04:41.659 But they're just both similar personalities. 0:04:41.699 --> 0:04:43.739 I think, you know what, though, they might actually get 0:04:43.739 --> 0:04:45.659 better the more time they spend together, Like the more 0:04:45.659 --> 0:04:47.539 we're out of it, Yeah, the more exposure they have 0:04:47.699 --> 0:04:49.499 with each other, and the more that they start to 0:04:49.499 --> 0:04:51.299 realize that this isn't something that they get to opt 0:04:51.299 --> 0:04:52.699 in on. That they're gonna you know, they're going to 0:04:52.779 --> 0:04:54.499 be spending time playing together. They're going to see more 0:04:54.499 --> 0:04:56.299 of each other. You might find that they have their 0:04:56.299 --> 0:04:58.099 own little friendship that develops as well. I think that 0:04:58.139 --> 0:04:59.139 stuff can take time, but. 0:04:59.219 --> 0:05:01.699 Our advice is exposure therapy, just like throw them in, 0:05:01.859 --> 0:05:03.699 let them more lines for. 0:05:03.859 --> 0:05:04.619 You and the other mom. 0:05:05.179 --> 0:05:08.259 Yeah, definitely persist through it. Do you think I see. 0:05:08.099 --> 0:05:09.619 To sacrifice a friend. 0:05:10.339 --> 0:05:12.099 I just think even if she does become a friend 0:05:12.139 --> 0:05:14.179 that's not a kid date friend, and you get to 0:05:14.219 --> 0:05:16.259 see it once a fortnite for a catch up, maybe 0:05:16.259 --> 0:05:16.699 you're going. 0:05:16.539 --> 0:05:18.659 For a walk together, whatever it is. 0:05:18.819 --> 0:05:21.299 It is really hard to meet people as adults that 0:05:21.299 --> 0:05:22.899 you connect with and you want to spend time with. 0:05:23.019 --> 0:05:25.539 So I do think that sometimes you need to try 0:05:25.579 --> 0:05:27.539 and make yourself a priority. And I know I'm not 0:05:27.579 --> 0:05:29.659 a mum, but I know all of my friends that 0:05:29.739 --> 0:05:32.379 are moms don't prioritize themselves. It's a part of being 0:05:32.419 --> 0:05:35.219 a mum, like there's always someone or something else more important. 0:05:35.579 --> 0:05:37.539 But at the end of the day, you do need 0:05:37.579 --> 0:05:39.019 to do some things for you too. If you've found 0:05:39.059 --> 0:05:41.019 someone that you enjoy spending time with and you know 0:05:41.099 --> 0:05:42.699 that's rare for you, I don't think you need to 0:05:42.699 --> 0:05:44.579 give it up just because your kids want to reap 0:05:44.579 --> 0:05:45.739 each other's hair out. 0:05:46.779 --> 0:05:48.738 Yeah, definitely, Sarah. 0:05:48.819 --> 0:05:50.979 Thanks so much for the call, And for anyone who 0:05:51.019 --> 0:05:53.819 wants any advice next week, please go and enter your 0:05:53.819 --> 0:05:55.819 ask uncut on the wind page. We might get you 0:05:55.859 --> 0:05:58.019 on as well to answer your questions stuff being a 0:05:58.059 --> 0:06:01.419 parent it is, thanks Sarah. It's actually so hard and 0:06:01.459 --> 0:06:04.219 like it really is, trying to find the right mix 0:06:04.259 --> 0:06:06.019 of like a friend who you get along with and 0:06:06.059 --> 0:06:09.659 you vibe with, but also your kids get along impossible. 0:06:10.059 --> 0:06:12.819 So in case you guys have missed it, I am 0:06:12.979 --> 0:06:13.699 getting married. 0:06:13.819 --> 0:06:15.899 No, no one has missed it, Britt. 0:06:16.219 --> 0:06:18.419 I just want to I want to let you know everyone, 0:06:18.619 --> 0:06:21.099 everyone who listens to the show and loves the show 0:06:21.259 --> 0:06:22.259 and knows you know. 0:06:22.419 --> 0:06:24.779 We know, we're all so happy for you. But no 0:06:24.779 --> 0:06:25.259 one missed it. 0:06:25.539 --> 0:06:29.259 The wedding is getting very very close, and I had 0:06:29.259 --> 0:06:30.859 a bit of a family get together on the weekend, 0:06:31.019 --> 0:06:33.539 and like I'd planned all the roles for everybody without 0:06:33.579 --> 0:06:35.939 actually speaking to them, you know, like how I'm like, okay, 0:06:35.979 --> 0:06:38.299 so the groom's been will bit the end, and then 0:06:38.339 --> 0:06:40.139 I'll have a flower girl and then I'm gonna have 0:06:40.179 --> 0:06:42.539 my nephew come down and then so I had everything 0:06:42.579 --> 0:06:43.419 planned in my head. 0:06:43.779 --> 0:06:45.259 I finally see my nephew. 0:06:45.419 --> 0:06:45.939 He's seven. 0:06:46.059 --> 0:06:48.178 He's a great little kid, and I'm like, hey, Parky 0:06:48.379 --> 0:06:50.419 and he's like yeah. And I was like so excited 0:06:50.499 --> 0:06:52.299 thinking that he's going to be so toughed. And I 0:06:52.339 --> 0:06:55.699 was like, how would you like to have the most 0:06:55.739 --> 0:06:58.779 important role? I was like, you're gonna dress up and 0:06:58.819 --> 0:07:01.059 you're gonna walk down with your cousin. You're gonna hold 0:07:01.139 --> 0:07:04.339 his hand, and you're gonna be holding some really important 0:07:04.379 --> 0:07:06.659 things and then when you get down to the end, 0:07:06.939 --> 0:07:08.419 you're going to hand them to Uncle Ben. 0:07:08.659 --> 0:07:10.459 Like I made this whole big thing. I was like, 0:07:10.539 --> 0:07:12.419 it's the most important role. 0:07:12.259 --> 0:07:14.099 Of the day. So he was the ring bearer? Is 0:07:14.139 --> 0:07:14.979 that what you were asking him? 0:07:15.019 --> 0:07:17.019 Well? Yeah, but I'm giving him multiple jobs, so he's 0:07:17.019 --> 0:07:18.099 not just the ring bearer. 0:07:18.139 --> 0:07:19.579 He's like doing a couple of things. 0:07:19.939 --> 0:07:20.299 Anyway. 0:07:20.339 --> 0:07:21.539 I was like, so what do you think? 0:07:21.739 --> 0:07:24.219 And I was expecting him to like hug me and 0:07:24.259 --> 0:07:27.139 like be like, oh, that's so fun and Dead. 0:07:27.019 --> 0:07:29.019 Qui and all the families around Dead Qui and he 0:07:29.059 --> 0:07:38.899 looks up he's like, you know what, No thank you, dude. 0:07:38.939 --> 0:07:40.939 And I said, I said, so what. He's like, no, 0:07:41.059 --> 0:07:41.939 thank you? And I said Oh. 0:07:42.139 --> 0:07:44.499 In my head, I was like, does he understand that 0:07:44.499 --> 0:07:46.259 was a rhetorical question, like he's doing it. 0:07:46.299 --> 0:07:47.939 I was like, what do you mean. No, He's like 0:07:47.939 --> 0:07:49.819 it's it's okay, but thanks for asking. 0:07:50.619 --> 0:07:51.539 And he's a kid. 0:07:51.819 --> 0:07:53.259 This is a kid who has been taught how to 0:07:53.259 --> 0:07:56.859 set good boundaries and I'm all for that. He's like, Brittany, Annie, Brittany, 0:07:57.139 --> 0:07:59.219 this is a boundary. And I don't want to be 0:07:59.299 --> 0:08:01.499 your ring bearer because that sounds like a shitty job. 0:08:01.619 --> 0:08:03.499 I'm not walking down holding my cousin's hand. 0:08:03.819 --> 0:08:06.219 And his mom was like, Parker, you're doing it. 0:08:06.779 --> 0:08:08.899 And he's like, oh, did he if you were a 0:08:08.899 --> 0:08:10.259 reason as to why you didn't want to do it? 0:08:10.299 --> 0:08:12.259 Did he say what? No, he didn't. 0:08:12.339 --> 0:08:15.179 And he was so polite. It was just like saying, hey, 0:08:15.419 --> 0:08:16.619 are you hungry? To you on some chicken? 0:08:16.659 --> 0:08:18.659 He was like no, thanks, Like that was it anyway. 0:08:18.979 --> 0:08:20.699 He came around at the end, but I just thought 0:08:20.739 --> 0:08:22.419 it was so funny. I was like, I can't force 0:08:22.419 --> 0:08:24.259 a kid, but I will bribe him. 0:08:24.299 --> 0:08:25.979 Also, what do you do on the day if a 0:08:26.059 --> 0:08:28.299 kid gets stage fright? All they changed their mind. 0:08:28.139 --> 0:08:30.499 Because oh, we had to not make him. 0:08:30.539 --> 0:08:33.139 We had so many kids in our wedding, all of 0:08:33.179 --> 0:08:35.539 like the nieces and nephews were there, like my kids. 0:08:35.578 --> 0:08:38.419 And at the time, Maley was three and Lola was two, 0:08:38.939 --> 0:08:41.059 And that's a pretty big responsibility for a three year 0:08:41.059 --> 0:08:42.499 old and a two year old to walk down the 0:08:42.539 --> 0:08:43.859 aisle and be the flower girls. 0:08:44.219 --> 0:08:45.819 And I will never forget. 0:08:45.859 --> 0:08:47.739 I was sitting in the car so like my like 0:08:47.819 --> 0:08:49.779 the car that I was in had pulled up, and 0:08:49.859 --> 0:08:51.939 my sister had gotten out with all the children. 0:08:52.059 --> 0:08:54.899 So she had three for five, six seven. 0:08:54.939 --> 0:08:57.739 She had seven kids, two of them under two, and 0:08:57.859 --> 0:08:59.579 most of them were walking down the island. 0:08:59.659 --> 0:09:01.939 She was kind of middle of the pack with these kids. 0:09:02.259 --> 0:09:04.379 And I'm looking from the car window and I just 0:09:04.459 --> 0:09:07.459 see Lola. She just veers off to the right. She's 0:09:07.539 --> 0:09:10.299 walking away. I think she saw a dark or something 0:09:10.619 --> 0:09:11.819 and she just starts walking. 0:09:11.939 --> 0:09:14.899 I'm yelling from the car for someone to get Lola, 0:09:14.979 --> 0:09:16.899 and then half the guests turned around there to me, 0:09:17.299 --> 0:09:17.699 there's me. 0:09:17.699 --> 0:09:18.939 Hanging out the window being. 0:09:18.779 --> 0:09:20.459 Like, get La, La. 0:09:21.379 --> 0:09:23.499 You can't trust him. You can't trust kids. They say, 0:09:23.499 --> 0:09:25.338 don't wait with kids or animals or both. 0:09:25.619 --> 0:09:26.499 It's one of those. 0:09:26.339 --> 0:09:28.419 Things where on the day you just have to accept 0:09:28.419 --> 0:09:30.499 that if there's a child that's upset or doesn't want 0:09:30.499 --> 0:09:31.499 to do it, then they don't do it. 0:09:31.539 --> 0:09:33.939 And I'm absolutely not going to make him. 0:09:33.979 --> 0:09:37.579 But it is big into football, like soccer, and I 0:09:37.659 --> 0:09:39.539 did have to pull out the bribes, and I said 0:09:39.579 --> 0:09:41.899 that Uncle Ben will teach him some football stuff if 0:09:41.939 --> 0:09:43.539 he can make it down the end safely. So I 0:09:43.579 --> 0:09:45.779 don't know if that makes me bad Auntie, I don't know, 0:09:45.899 --> 0:09:47.619 but I think we've got him there. 0:09:47.699 --> 0:09:50.019 I mean, you're a parent that's like reached nirvana if 0:09:50.059 --> 0:09:51.379 you don't use bribery on your kids. 0:09:51.379 --> 0:09:52.339 That's what I've realized. 0:09:52.419 --> 0:09:54.739 It's kind of like it's number one is nice and 0:09:54.819 --> 0:09:57.419 number two is bribes, and then number three is telling 0:09:57.419 --> 0:10:00.819 them that they're doing it. That's pretty much all you've got. 0:10:00.179 --> 0:10:03.739 I It is not a new thing that most people 0:10:03.779 --> 0:10:07.019 who are dating have used online dating apps Think Tinder, 0:10:07.179 --> 0:10:07.859 think Bumble. 0:10:08.499 --> 0:10:10.779 The criticism that's come with a lot of online dating. 0:10:10.539 --> 0:10:14.859 Apps is that even though most apps are trying to 0:10:15.019 --> 0:10:17.259 kind of encourage things like fill. 0:10:17.019 --> 0:10:19.659 Out your bio, answer questions. 0:10:19.259 --> 0:10:22.979 About yourself add more value, people still seem to get 0:10:23.019 --> 0:10:25.619 caught up in looking at the pictures and making their 0:10:25.659 --> 0:10:28.099 decisions based on the way someone looks over the person 0:10:28.099 --> 0:10:29.499 that someone actually is on a dating. 0:10:29.339 --> 0:10:31.979 App, which of course they're going to do that. That's 0:10:32.019 --> 0:10:33.579 like the first thing you're gonna look at. Whether you 0:10:33.619 --> 0:10:35.899 say you're not superficial, whether you say looks don't matter, 0:10:35.979 --> 0:10:38.099 Like when you are faced with a written bio and 0:10:38.139 --> 0:10:40.059 a picture of something, you're always gonna look at the person. 0:10:40.139 --> 0:10:42.059 And I've done every app. I shouldn't say every app. 0:10:42.099 --> 0:10:44.819 It in gone Grinder, but I've done most of the 0:10:44.899 --> 0:10:46.979 mainstream dating app Don't get me wrong. 0:10:47.379 --> 0:10:48.859 I think that there are loads of people who are 0:10:48.859 --> 0:10:50.699 not superficially in their dating, Like I think that there 0:10:50.699 --> 0:10:52.699 are loads of people who don't have a specific type 0:10:52.699 --> 0:10:55.619 who date outside the box, et cetera. But you will 0:10:55.699 --> 0:10:58.819 be swayed when you do see a photo because I 0:10:58.819 --> 0:11:00.259 think the thing is is like, if you want to 0:11:00.299 --> 0:11:03.339 go into dating unbiased, the only way to do it 0:11:03.379 --> 0:11:06.059 is to not have any clue what that person looks like, 0:11:06.339 --> 0:11:10.539 so that you're not swayed at all by their physical attractiveness. Now, 0:11:10.539 --> 0:11:13.459 we've seen TV shows like Love is Blind or even 0:11:13.459 --> 0:11:16.379 Love Triangle, which is on stand. For anyone who doesn't 0:11:16.379 --> 0:11:18.459 know what Love is Blind, is you match with someone 0:11:18.619 --> 0:11:21.219 and you grow a connection with them, but you don't 0:11:21.219 --> 0:11:23.299 actually see what they look like. So you choose the 0:11:23.299 --> 0:11:25.219 person that you want to be with based on the 0:11:25.219 --> 0:11:28.339 fact that you have chemistry and connection and shared values 0:11:28.339 --> 0:11:30.179 and all this sort of stuff, but you have no 0:11:30.339 --> 0:11:33.779 clue what they look like until you've committed. Well, there 0:11:33.819 --> 0:11:35.579 is a new dating app that's come out, and it's 0:11:35.579 --> 0:11:38.579 called Tribal. It's been created by a psychologist, and the 0:11:38.619 --> 0:11:41.139 reason for this is basically the same premise. You go 0:11:41.179 --> 0:11:43.819 on there, you match, you chat, you share what you're 0:11:43.819 --> 0:11:46.939 looking for, your values, everything else, but you cannot see 0:11:46.939 --> 0:11:49.579 the person's photos for seventy two hours. 0:11:50.019 --> 0:11:51.779 I think seventy two hours is the perfect amount. 0:11:51.899 --> 0:11:53.699 Well, seventy two hours is a good amount of time 0:11:53.739 --> 0:11:55.619 to know if you've got banter with someone, Yeah, and 0:11:55.699 --> 0:11:57.419 know if you've got chemistry with someone. 0:11:57.259 --> 0:11:59.019 You're not too deep that you can't divorce them. 0:11:59.619 --> 0:12:01.458 You're not married. Yeah, it's not a marrit at first 0:12:01.499 --> 0:12:02.179 site situation. 0:12:02.299 --> 0:12:04.139 But then it gets a bit awkward, right, If you've 0:12:04.179 --> 0:12:07.099 got seventy two hours of like proper banter, it's going 0:12:07.179 --> 0:12:10.019 really really well. When you release each other's faces and 0:12:10.059 --> 0:12:13.578 for some reason you really are not physically into it 0:12:13.619 --> 0:12:15.299 at all and you do want to call it quits. 0:12:15.379 --> 0:12:17.419 That's an awkward conversation. 0:12:17.059 --> 0:12:18.299 Okay, But here's the kicker, right. 0:12:18.979 --> 0:12:21.619 I think that it's a pretty good litmus as to 0:12:21.699 --> 0:12:24.899 how superficial you might be or how much you prioritize 0:12:25.259 --> 0:12:27.539 looks in your dating and in your relationships, because if 0:12:27.579 --> 0:12:30.819 you're having these great connections with people and then you're 0:12:30.979 --> 0:12:32.739 matching with them, and then you're seeing their photos and 0:12:32.819 --> 0:12:35.619 afterwards you're like, hmm, not even going to entertain a date, 0:12:35.939 --> 0:12:38.659 like if that seems to be your predetermined preset or 0:12:38.659 --> 0:12:40.939 like over and over and over again, I'd be like, 0:12:41.059 --> 0:12:42.979 maybe you need to date outside the box and try 0:12:42.979 --> 0:12:45.659 someone that isn't your quote unquote classic type, because there 0:12:45.739 --> 0:12:47.578 might be a reason why the relationships aren't working out. 0:12:47.579 --> 0:12:49.299 Your type might not be a good type for you. 0:12:49.299 --> 0:12:51.379 Your type might be an asshole. We've all been there, 0:12:51.379 --> 0:12:52.739 we've all done it. I had a type once one 0:12:52.779 --> 0:12:53.379 a time as well. 0:12:53.539 --> 0:12:54.858 I do think it'll stop. 0:12:54.579 --> 0:12:57.459 The gamification though of dating and I think of dating apps, sorry, 0:12:57.499 --> 0:13:00.219 And I think it will increase more intentional dating because 0:13:00.219 --> 0:13:02.899 it's sometimes you go on dating apps for the validation, 0:13:03.059 --> 0:13:04.659 like you want to go on. You want to say, oh, 0:13:04.699 --> 0:13:06.219 these I've matched with all these hot people. 0:13:06.859 --> 0:13:07.059 Yeah. 0:13:07.099 --> 0:13:09.619 You to feel confidence, you feel. 0:13:09.379 --> 0:13:10.419 Good about yourself. 0:13:10.459 --> 0:13:12.899 You get to chat to a hot person briefly, whatever, 0:13:12.979 --> 0:13:14.819 someone you know, subjective that you think is hot. But 0:13:14.859 --> 0:13:16.859 in this it has to be more intentional because you're 0:13:16.899 --> 0:13:18.659 only going on there to put the effort in. You 0:13:18.699 --> 0:13:20.338 have to have the connection. You have to have the 0:13:20.379 --> 0:13:23.139 banter before you discover who are If you were dating, 0:13:23.259 --> 0:13:25.099 would you try and app like this, Yeah, I would, 0:13:25.139 --> 0:13:26.819 but just for the content, probably to bring it to 0:13:26.859 --> 0:13:27.179 you here. 0:13:27.219 --> 0:13:30.179 Really I reckon I would not just for content. I 0:13:30.219 --> 0:13:33.099 would happily try it. I think I definitely got to 0:13:33.139 --> 0:13:35.099 a place in my online dating where I didn't trust 0:13:35.099 --> 0:13:37.539 my ability to make good judgments on people. So if 0:13:37.579 --> 0:13:40.099 I could match with someone and have like good bantering 0:13:40.139 --> 0:13:41.578 chemistry with them, I think it would have gone a 0:13:41.579 --> 0:13:41.939 long way. 0:13:41.979 --> 0:13:45.739 Also, a guy who can make you laugh, Oh, that's it, 0:13:45.859 --> 0:13:46.899 that's all most women want. 0:13:47.019 --> 0:13:47.819 Nah, that's a lie. 0:13:47.899 --> 0:13:49.819 People say that there's plenty of people that can make 0:13:49.859 --> 0:13:52.179 you laugh that are not good catchers. Like, there's definitely 0:13:52.179 --> 0:13:54.299 more to that, but of course personality is everything. I 0:13:54.339 --> 0:13:57.619 would one hundred percent try this because I was exasperated 0:13:58.339 --> 0:14:01.059 by the online dating community. I was on there for 0:14:01.139 --> 0:14:04.259 so long that it was just the same people in there. 0:14:04.299 --> 0:14:06.379 I was seeing the same people on there, which means 0:14:06.419 --> 0:14:09.219 they were seeing me as well for like eight years. 0:14:10.059 --> 0:14:11.739 She is again, Yeah she's back. 0:14:12.099 --> 0:14:12.779 But I was like that. 0:14:12.899 --> 0:14:14.019 I was like, oh, here he is again. 0:14:14.739 --> 0:14:17.098 You actually get to know these strangers. 0:14:16.619 --> 0:14:17.659 But don't in your area. 0:14:17.739 --> 0:14:19.859 Yeah, totally. Don't you update your profile photo though. So 0:14:19.859 --> 0:14:21.979 it's different because that's the thing. I remember being on 0:14:21.979 --> 0:14:23.899 the dating apps for a long time, and it would 0:14:23.939 --> 0:14:25.099 be the people whose profile I. 0:14:25.219 --> 0:14:25.899 Know you too well. 0:14:26.019 --> 0:14:28.459 Doesn't matter if your updated profile, you know, you know, 0:14:28.539 --> 0:14:29.739 it's an updated profile. 0:14:29.939 --> 0:14:32.819 Alright, Look, guys, if you were in the trenches of dating, 0:14:32.819 --> 0:14:34.059 this might be an app that you want to give 0:14:34.059 --> 0:14:36.499 it a try. It's called tribal I think I wish 0:14:36.539 --> 0:14:38.499 I thought of that. Yeah, I mean, yeah, I wish 0:14:38.539 --> 0:14:39.939 I thought of a lot of apps put it that way.