WEBVTT - TALKBACK TINGZ: Dropping Dirty Words On Air 📻

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>So talkback teams is where we bring you some of

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<v Speaker 2>the cooked shit that we hear on talkback radio. Because

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<v Speaker 2>it's it's live, it's dangerous. You get these squirky old

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<v Speaker 2>callers calling through to those places. And do you remember

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<v Speaker 2>back in episode fifteen, so we're going back a while,

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<v Speaker 2>we played you the time that a bunch of people

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<v Speaker 2>banded together to sabotage Graham Gilbert's nightly quiz.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh we're talking India, yep, India.

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<v Speaker 2>Every question he asked, every single question he asked, they

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<v Speaker 2>would answer with India just to piss him off.

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<v Speaker 4>Which Australian gymnast one Commonwealth Games gold in nineteen ninety

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<v Speaker 4>for his performance on the pommel horse India.

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<v Speaker 5>Are you Marcus? Grow up?

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<v Speaker 6>Whatever here?

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<v Speaker 7>Grow up?

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<v Speaker 5>Good on you boys are going to be one of

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<v Speaker 5>those nights, Robert, good evening. Hello Graham, how are you

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<v Speaker 5>not too bad?

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<v Speaker 4>You'll have a sensible answer, aren't you get megaphone?

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<v Speaker 3>Oh?

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<v Speaker 5>And please learn more?

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<v Speaker 8>Please?

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<v Speaker 2>That was in our show opener for a while and

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<v Speaker 2>it was iconic to have you ever heard of more

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<v Speaker 2>defeated man?

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<v Speaker 7>Now?

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<v Speaker 5>Please?

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<v Speaker 3>I know God, you know the think about talk back

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<v Speaker 3>that I don't think we've ever addressed. Like these guys,

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<v Speaker 3>they have to time out to the hour for the

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<v Speaker 3>half hour for the news, so they sometimes have to

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<v Speaker 3>feel minutes of audio of dead air just to make

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<v Speaker 3>it out to the news break. So you just the

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<v Speaker 3>shit you have to come up with. It's a tough job.

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<v Speaker 2>But although it's not that hard to get through to

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<v Speaker 2>Graham show. So that's why somebody prank callers slip through

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<v Speaker 2>the crack. He does, Like we tried it once, room,

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<v Speaker 2>He didn't even vet us. He just put us on

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<v Speaker 2>air straight to it, didn't even ask our name off air.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, so he's quite used to.

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<v Speaker 2>Prank calls at this point, and he's got quite a

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<v Speaker 2>short views when it comes to being on the receiving end.

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<v Speaker 2>So he was asking his listeners about salt water in

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<v Speaker 2>the ocean and what makes it so salty, and this

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<v Speaker 2>old bird called through with a dirty joke. I suspect

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<v Speaker 2>it's not actually an old lady. You can tell by

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<v Speaker 2>the voice.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh you think it's a dot Wigan scenario.

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<v Speaker 2>It isry dot Wiggans. You can just tell by the

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<v Speaker 2>voice that it's not a real person.

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<v Speaker 7>It is.

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<v Speaker 5>And the Sultan in the sea Eleanor is.

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<v Speaker 7>It the saltiness of the ocean.

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<v Speaker 5>Yes, my grandson told me he was looking it up

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<v Speaker 5>on the internet. All right, because of all the seamen,

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<v Speaker 5>is that your answer? All the seamen in the ocean

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<v Speaker 5>makes it salty?

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<v Speaker 4>In twelve sixty nine. We will totally ignore that answer, okay,

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<v Speaker 4>because I just wish these people wouldn't phone up and

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<v Speaker 4>put on boggy voices. Alrighty, they think they're going to

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<v Speaker 4>get away with it, but please, do we need to

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<v Speaker 4>say it one more time? We do take all of

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<v Speaker 4>your numbers and is an offense?

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<v Speaker 5>Okay? Is an offense to Communications Act?

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<v Speaker 3>Shut horse. I just don't think that's true.

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<v Speaker 2>You need to look up the Communications Act. It's even

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<v Speaker 2>been to prank call someone because I really don't think

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<v Speaker 2>it is.

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<v Speaker 3>We do it all the time. I have to do

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<v Speaker 3>radio codes once a year, and no, you could call

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<v Speaker 3>us have no legal binding, right, they can do whatever

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<v Speaker 3>they want.

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<v Speaker 2>It's just so easy and so fun to get through.

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<v Speaker 2>And I just love his overreaction. Yeah, like, oh please,

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<v Speaker 2>we'll just totally ignore that. I have another example, yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>or Graham, right, No, it's not Graham. This is a

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<v Speaker 2>show in Melbourne on three aw and they were on

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<v Speaker 2>the receiving end of a filthy prank call and their reaction.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, they overreacted so much. It's like, oh,

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<v Speaker 2>laugh a little darln Oh they were angry. Oh they

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<v Speaker 2>were furious.

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<v Speaker 3>Okay, So this is a three a W.

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<v Speaker 5>In Melbourne Nightline with Bruce Mansfield and Philip Brady on

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<v Speaker 5>twelve seventy eight, three.

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<v Speaker 6>A W Newport. Toby's at Newport. Hello Toby, Hi, Bruce,

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<v Speaker 6>phil Yes, Toby, how are you cool?

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<v Speaker 1>Good?

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<v Speaker 5>Thanks?

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<v Speaker 2>I have a joke? Yes, what's the funniest smelling thing

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<v Speaker 2>in the whole old.

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<v Speaker 6>World, the funniest smelling thing in the whole wide world?

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<v Speaker 5>Caps you'll know? Oh no, what was? And anoh what

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<v Speaker 5>a pity?

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<v Speaker 6>Toby, Never call us again. Play Never in your life

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<v Speaker 6>even think about it and think, all right, we've dumped

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<v Speaker 6>your Toby.

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<v Speaker 7>But there are people like Carmen and Queenie online and

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<v Speaker 7>could hear that in the.

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<v Speaker 6>Fen And we heard it and Simon heard it, so

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<v Speaker 6>you're ruined it for all of us. Toby. If you've

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<v Speaker 6>ever thinking of tuning in again, just don't get a

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<v Speaker 6>life and Toby, grow.

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<v Speaker 3>Up, Grow up. Carmen and Queene.

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<v Speaker 8>I found an answer to all the communications, so threatening

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<v Speaker 8>to kill or cause serious harm to someone is considered

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<v Speaker 8>a criminal offense.

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<v Speaker 5>Of course.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh my god, Jenna, do you think we didn't know

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<v Speaker 3>that even that brand new information, drowning a human will

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<v Speaker 3>send you to prison? Oh good to know, no, or.

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<v Speaker 2>Even threatening to do so.

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<v Speaker 8>And if the pranks doesn't threaten their victim, repeated calls

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<v Speaker 8>can amount to harassment, stalking, or bullying. So that person

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<v Speaker 8>wasn't doing it, no, committing an offense.

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<v Speaker 3>God, that call was hilarious. They were so upset.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you love how as soon as he said an

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<v Speaker 2>Anchov's C word you just heard the hosts in the

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<v Speaker 2>background and be like, yeah, like turning all the buttons off.

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<v Speaker 3>God, that's so funny, good joke. I'd have heard that

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<v Speaker 3>one before. That's fresh good.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, yeah, I was going to suggest that we get

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<v Speaker 2>dot Wiggins, your eighty year old ninety year old I

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<v Speaker 2>can't remember ho old you, your alter ego, the old

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<v Speaker 2>lady that comes out to play every now and then,

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<v Speaker 2>because we haven't heard from dotting.

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<v Speaker 3>To beer no, I miss her.

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<v Speaker 2>I was going to suggest that we call a station

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<v Speaker 2>and try and get through. But if it's repeated prank call,

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<v Speaker 2>that's like, maybe that is, we'd have to call a

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<v Speaker 2>different show for example. Actually, no, Grand's not even on

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<v Speaker 2>at this time of day, so it's probably fine.

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<v Speaker 3>We could call an FM station.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh that would be way harder if it's an FM

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<v Speaker 2>music station.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>True, but you have to call and basically use a

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<v Speaker 2>dirty word and see if they even notice.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh, like slip, because you know how.

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<v Speaker 2>She said the streaming in the ocean, that was like

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<v Speaker 2>a double what's the word? Yeah, because she was referring

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<v Speaker 2>to men of the sea, men at sea, which is

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<v Speaker 2>the men, but she tied it in with the saltiness,

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<v Speaker 2>so it's actually dirty. So we need like a hidden meaning.

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<v Speaker 3>What if I talk about the fact that my pussy

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<v Speaker 3>won't stop it ching and I think she might have mites?

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<v Speaker 2>That's not even life. Yeah, smaller than lies, like words

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<v Speaker 2>that sound dirty.

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<v Speaker 3>Beaver, bever fever, Oh, beaver's good.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't think we even have beavers in Australia though,

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<v Speaker 2>so that's too obvious.

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<v Speaker 3>No, we don't. Maybe I can just say that I've

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<v Speaker 3>got suddenly I've been I'm fascinated with beavers, and it's

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<v Speaker 3>very late in life because I haven't normally been interested

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<v Speaker 3>in beavers. But I watched something on Telly. What about

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<v Speaker 3>the word rump? No, I want more vogel like it

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<v Speaker 3>needs to be like I could say, whole, like a

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<v Speaker 3>buttthole like Fanny Fanny flange. What's flange?

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<v Speaker 7>Ma?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh my god?

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<v Speaker 3>Flaps? Oh flaps is good.

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<v Speaker 2>Hi, I'm calling them having an issue with my flat.

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<v Speaker 2>But what could you actually be talking about? Obviously not

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<v Speaker 2>your badge when.

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<v Speaker 3>I'd flaps on, I've got a four wheel drive.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh yeah, my flaps are just no matter how much

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<v Speaker 2>I clean them, they have it in grime and and

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<v Speaker 2>it stinks.

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<v Speaker 3>Let's go with flaps. Oh my god, I like flaps.

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<v Speaker 2>I've heard otherwise about you. What about like we're using flaps,

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<v Speaker 2>but you're actually talking about flapper jacks like the pancakes.

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<v Speaker 3>You're like when I.

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<v Speaker 2>Come home, my my husband loves to Nora on flaps.

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<v Speaker 2>But I'm just having some trouble. The flaps are too dry.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh yeah, flap jacks. Is that too much of a like?

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<v Speaker 3>I also don't think it's flaper jacks. I think you're

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<v Speaker 3>mispronouncing that. I think it's flapjacks. Oh whatever, you upset

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<v Speaker 3>the Canadian. Yeah, flapjacks like you.

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<v Speaker 2>You have this whole narrative that you like to cook

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<v Speaker 2>your husband pancakes when it comes home from work every day.

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<v Speaker 2>But you're having problems with the flap, with the flaps. Yeah, yeah, okay,

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<v Speaker 2>I like that that work, and there's nothing more he

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<v Speaker 2>enjoys more after a long hard day at work than

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<v Speaker 2>my flaps, some moist flaps.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, and what I just start with them having some

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<v Speaker 3>meritable problems and then because I don't want to lead

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<v Speaker 3>with the flaps, because that'll that'll be a red flag,

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<v Speaker 3>maybe a red flap.

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<v Speaker 2>Maybe when you speak to producer or whatever, you say

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<v Speaker 2>you've got a cooking question. Yeah, on who's even on it?

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<v Speaker 3>I'm looking now, who's on air?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh okay, so same station as Graham and John Law's

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<v Speaker 2>Brent Bultitude.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh yeah, I don't.

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<v Speaker 2>Think he'd be hard to get through too.

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<v Speaker 3>It's the number.

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<v Speaker 2>Let's try thirteen twelve sixty nine famously.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh yeah, of course, all right, let's call shit, don't

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<v Speaker 3>get me yes, separ radio and work.

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<v Speaker 6>Who's cooling me me?

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<v Speaker 1>Sorry you're talking to me?

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<v Speaker 2>I can't that mean?

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<v Speaker 3>No? No, certainly not dot D dot Brent a be.

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<v Speaker 1>I've been with my husband four years and they're having

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<v Speaker 1>meritable issues and I just wanted to see to stick

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<v Speaker 1>it through.

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<v Speaker 3>Or is it too late in life to throw away?

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<v Speaker 7>It won't be long? Hold on, make the payments. You've

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<v Speaker 7>got serious problems, absolutely serious problems ahead of you. Brian's

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<v Speaker 7>next time, Brian, there we go? How are you? Brian?

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<v Speaker 8>How's the left eye?

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<v Speaker 7>The left eyes? Find it's the right eye that had

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<v Speaker 7>caused me all the problems.

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<v Speaker 3>N what's this guy's name, Brent? The hostess brand? You

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<v Speaker 3>just confidently call him Kent.

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<v Speaker 5>And I quite or he does quite?

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<v Speaker 1>Frank?

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<v Speaker 5>Hurry up?

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<v Speaker 3>What's what's the caller?

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<v Speaker 2>His name again?

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<v Speaker 3>Brian or something? Brian?

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<v Speaker 2>Phil?

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<v Speaker 3>Come on, Brian, boring story work.

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<v Speaker 7>Out here on the campaign.

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<v Speaker 1>I have loved your head and make you knew how

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<v Speaker 1>you go?

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<v Speaker 7>You can't let anybody know that, Kenny, he's gotta You've

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<v Speaker 7>got to carry on good talk, Brian, Thank you for

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<v Speaker 7>you God?

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<v Speaker 3>Oh oh yes, sorry, Trance, you have conjunctivetis do you?

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<v Speaker 7>No? No?

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<v Speaker 5>No?

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<v Speaker 7>I wish I did because I could get over that.

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<v Speaker 5>What you gonna? What do you have in your eye?

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<v Speaker 7>I had a detached in my right eye.

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<v Speaker 1>This is awful. Milk will fix this side milk will

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<v Speaker 1>fix it. Skim milk, skim milk, and you put it

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<v Speaker 1>in nod you put it, you.

0:10:53.400 --> 0:10:58.520
<v Speaker 7>Put it in the milk detachment put it. How can

0:10:58.559 --> 0:10:59.959
<v Speaker 7>I help you don't? What would you like to say?

0:11:00.160 --> 0:11:01.679
<v Speaker 1>Or the cap of the milk and you put your

0:11:01.679 --> 0:11:05.400
<v Speaker 1>eye and you roll your right back anyway. I look,

0:11:05.400 --> 0:11:07.800
<v Speaker 1>I'm not having a meritable problem. But I've been with

0:11:07.840 --> 0:11:12.520
<v Speaker 1>my daughter's husband, Brian for forty forty forty five years,

0:11:12.600 --> 0:11:14.920
<v Speaker 1>and I'll cook him dinner every night. He seems to

0:11:15.000 --> 0:11:16.680
<v Speaker 1>enjoy it in it, and he seems to enjoy tea.

0:11:16.760 --> 0:11:20.079
<v Speaker 1>And make him sweets, are making food, are making savory food,

0:11:20.440 --> 0:11:24.520
<v Speaker 1>and he mostly seems to enjoy my my flaps. The

0:11:24.559 --> 0:11:29.120
<v Speaker 1>only problem is he tends to be used to moist flaps. However,

0:11:29.440 --> 0:11:34.280
<v Speaker 1>he now sadly has experienced that my flaps are dry,

0:11:34.640 --> 0:11:37.000
<v Speaker 1>so he's not happy.

0:11:38.320 --> 0:11:38.600
<v Speaker 2>Cheering.

0:11:39.920 --> 0:11:40.880
<v Speaker 7>Let's take a break.

0:11:41.320 --> 0:11:43.680
<v Speaker 1>If it's easy, We're go on.

0:11:43.840 --> 0:11:45.520
<v Speaker 3>I think they hung up when you don't hang up

0:11:45.559 --> 0:11:50.040
<v Speaker 3>on me. Let's take a break. Oh my god, Oh

0:11:50.080 --> 0:11:51.120
<v Speaker 3>he didn't want to borro it.

0:11:51.280 --> 0:11:52.840
<v Speaker 2>No, I think you weren't subtle enough.

0:11:53.679 --> 0:11:56.600
<v Speaker 3>I really didn't weave it innan.

0:11:55.960 --> 0:11:58.600
<v Speaker 2>To be I cook him a beautiful stack of flaps,

0:11:58.640 --> 0:12:00.640
<v Speaker 2>like you know it could be something else for you

0:12:00.720 --> 0:12:02.640
<v Speaker 2>just went riding and when he got the black my drive.

0:12:02.520 --> 0:12:07.200
<v Speaker 3>Flaps, I got distracted by the eye.

0:12:09.080 --> 0:12:09.520
<v Speaker 1>You know what.

0:12:09.679 --> 0:12:12.280
<v Speaker 3>I felt bad because the poor bus it has a

0:12:12.360 --> 0:12:16.199
<v Speaker 3>detached retina. And then here I am being a bastard

0:12:16.240 --> 0:12:17.920
<v Speaker 3>to him, and then I called him Trent.

0:12:19.920 --> 0:12:20.600
<v Speaker 5>Isn't just me?

0:12:21.080 --> 0:12:24.360
<v Speaker 2>You should follow these idiots online. Search a couple of

0:12:24.440 --> 0:12:24.880
<v Speaker 2>meters