WEBVTT - What Is A Fuzzy Wrecking Ball Friend? 😈

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<v Speaker 1>Tata Flex and Firms Flex and Firms.

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<v Speaker 2>This is the Flex and Firms catch Up podcast.

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<v Speaker 3>It is Flex and Firms on CATA. We have come

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<v Speaker 3>across a phenomena called the fuzzy wrecking ball friend correct

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<v Speaker 3>kind of sounds.

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<v Speaker 2>Like it is? It is what it sounds like.

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<v Speaker 3>The friend who is really sweet and they mean well

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<v Speaker 3>and they're very unassuming. It somehow they annihilate everything that

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<v Speaker 3>comes in their path like a truck.

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<v Speaker 2>Listen to this.

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<v Speaker 4>I think the hardest friendship dynamic to reconcile is the

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<v Speaker 4>friend who is a fuzzy wrecking ball. And by that

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<v Speaker 4>I mean this friend may not be wantonly malicious. It's

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<v Speaker 4>not like one of those the call is coming from

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<v Speaker 4>inside the house type of situation. They may even be

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<v Speaker 4>so sweet and so fun and such a good time

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<v Speaker 4>to hang out with. But because they may not be

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<v Speaker 4>the most emotionally mature or dare I say even the smartest,

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<v Speaker 4>a lot of their actions definitely inconvenience you and go

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<v Speaker 4>beyond inconvenience you and kind of like mess your life

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<v Speaker 4>up in a lot of ways, whether it's hitting on

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<v Speaker 4>the person that you have a crush on, saying something

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<v Speaker 4>to a group of people, that they shouldn't have said

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<v Speaker 4>that was super personal to you. Whatever it may be,

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<v Speaker 4>it could be in small ways and it could be

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<v Speaker 4>in big ways. The thing you need to know about

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<v Speaker 4>the fuzzy wrecking ball friend is that even though they're fuzzy,

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<v Speaker 4>even though they're so sweet, they are still a wrecking ball.

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<v Speaker 4>What she was trying to say to me specifically was

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<v Speaker 4>that my intuition has never really been off, So why

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<v Speaker 4>do I continue to give certain people so many many chances?

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<v Speaker 4>And I think there's definitely a difference between a gut

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<v Speaker 4>feeling and something that's like a panic response from something

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<v Speaker 4>that happened in the past.

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<v Speaker 2>You know what's so crazy.

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<v Speaker 3>When I told Freumi about the concept of a fuzzy

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<v Speaker 3>wrecking ball friend, she points to out producer Brow and

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<v Speaker 3>she says, and I quit, I see that for you,

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<v Speaker 3>which is just the craziest thing to say to someone.

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<v Speaker 3>But then she did double down and say no, because

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<v Speaker 3>we're so similar. And let me askually, we're so similar

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<v Speaker 3>clarified place place I hadn't heard.

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<v Speaker 2>I think a definition. I think it's a self made term.

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<v Speaker 2>Bye again. I can tell these bloody and quote a

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<v Speaker 2>millionaire number four. Ever, that's the person that started it.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, started this mess. Just the term fezzy fuzzy, fuzzy

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<v Speaker 1>wrecking ball. I saw Brookie, our producer, and her and

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<v Speaker 1>I soon doubling down. I doubled down, and then I said,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm the same, so I'm allowed to say it. I've

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<v Speaker 1>had enough of TikTok. I've got nothing more to add

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<v Speaker 1>to this. You just can't be in peace anymore.

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<v Speaker 3>Just know that every single quirk or slightly annoying characteristic

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<v Speaker 3>that you thought was just like hidden't slightly concealed from everyone. No.

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<v Speaker 2>No, it's been clocked and it's been named.

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<v Speaker 1>Seriously, we should just start doing a series of them.

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<v Speaker 1>This is my theory on the dolphin smooth back friend.

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<v Speaker 2>This is my theory.

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<v Speaker 3>It's the bit you've never had back me and you

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<v Speaker 3>know as for that reason, she doesn't understand what it's

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<v Speaker 3>like tennis skin insecurities.

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<v Speaker 1>She does not have the same lived experience period, and

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<v Speaker 1>we need to.

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<v Speaker 2>Respect her anyway. I see where they're going.

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<v Speaker 1>Personally, I'm probably at the end of my tether in

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<v Speaker 1>terms of investigating friendship.

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<v Speaker 2>Sounds so wound up.

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<v Speaker 3>Right at the end of my text, I pressed, I

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<v Speaker 3>love that this has a name for it because you know,

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<v Speaker 3>we've had one one too many, we'll say conversations generally,

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<v Speaker 3>but about friendships, and it's the same archetype that gets

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<v Speaker 3>called out, the same Oh they never like reply or

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<v Speaker 3>they never plan anything, and it's like, can we get

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<v Speaker 3>it right? But when you push that to the side,

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<v Speaker 3>there are these other, like slightly more unique archetypes that

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<v Speaker 3>do just as much damage. But unfortunately for us, did

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<v Speaker 3>not have a name. You know, when people like, you know,

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<v Speaker 3>I don't like the person, she's just too nice.

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<v Speaker 2>You're like, what is that? What are you talking about?

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<v Speaker 1>What is clutching?

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<v Speaker 3>It's clutching. But also it's like, oh no, what you're

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<v Speaker 3>perceiving is to be nice. It's like you feel like

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<v Speaker 3>this person's like generally manipulative, so anything they do is

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<v Speaker 3>not gonna come across. Well, so now you found a

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<v Speaker 3>way to frame nice as like a negative characteristic.

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<v Speaker 2>Back to the fuzzy wrecking ball though, what do you

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<v Speaker 2>actually do with that?

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<v Speaker 3>Because I think that I've kind of like, I don't

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<v Speaker 3>have any fuzzy wrecking ball friends. I think I just

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<v Speaker 3>have like ditsy wrecking ball friends. She did mention ditzy

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<v Speaker 3>being one of those characteristics but I've just had in

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<v Speaker 3>the past one too many friends that are just so

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<v Speaker 3>acutely aware of the damage that they do and how

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<v Speaker 3>disruptive they are, not only to themselves but to other people.

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<v Speaker 3>And I think, you know, when you are the doctor

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<v Speaker 3>phil Oprah friend, it's it's really validating to be able

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<v Speaker 3>to help someone with their problems.

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<v Speaker 2>You're like, oh, this is really sick. They need me.

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<v Speaker 3>And then you're like, no, like the common denominator is you.

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<v Speaker 3>And while you're doing that wrecking everybody's lives, you just

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<v Speaker 3>go on about your day like you're just like starting

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<v Speaker 3>storms and leaving, starting storms and leaving. And you know,

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<v Speaker 3>I read what my issue was with that, or where

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<v Speaker 3>my fault was, is that I wasn't very good at

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<v Speaker 3>defining what types of friends I had, so I was

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<v Speaker 3>kind of like accumulating all these people that I just

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<v Speaker 3>was around a lot by virtue of us like both

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<v Speaker 3>being DJs or both living in Sydney, or both going

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<v Speaker 3>to the same parties and spending a lot of time,

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<v Speaker 3>and then having like that claim by proximity, and you're like, damn,

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<v Speaker 3>like now I'm claimed by default and I didn't even

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<v Speaker 3>like you that much, and you're a problem. Yep, you

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<v Speaker 3>got a reputation.

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<v Speaker 2>That precedes you.

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<v Speaker 3>People do this when your name comes up, and I

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<v Speaker 3>don't mind that generally when it's like well received, like

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<v Speaker 3>you've earned your reputation of being like annoying or like

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<v Speaker 3>Caddy or whatever.

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<v Speaker 2>But then a reputation by proxy. No, I do not

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<v Speaker 2>want to be near that. So you are the fuzzy

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<v Speaker 2>wrecking ball friend. I couldn't be if I tried.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm very sensitive and clever and I'm not ditsy and scene.

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<v Speaker 2>What are you? Are you the wrecking ball friend you

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<v Speaker 2>ever been? No, I'm a doctored pheel friend. Do you

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<v Speaker 2>know what friend I used to be? Though?

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<v Speaker 3>I had to really grow out of that really quickly.

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<v Speaker 3>Remember I told you I was like a bit of

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<v Speaker 3>a reserved friend. Like I was there, you asked me

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<v Speaker 3>a question, I'll answer it. But I had like my

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<v Speaker 3>own little special interest, so I like was in the group,

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<v Speaker 3>floating around, but never in the drama or whatever. And

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<v Speaker 3>then I got to like sixteen seventeen eighteen, I was like,

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<v Speaker 3>these people need me. I gotta say some shit, right.

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<v Speaker 3>So you do you stand up for your friends, You

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<v Speaker 3>stick up for the person in class, You assert yourself

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<v Speaker 3>and it goes well. But then everyone's like, great, well

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<v Speaker 3>default to you.

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<v Speaker 2>You got it. I don't need to do anything because

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<v Speaker 2>Lil has my back. She got me.

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<v Speaker 3>And then what happened is that I had to become

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<v Speaker 3>an authority on like everybody's personal issues. And then I

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<v Speaker 3>became the radically honest friend.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh we hate that. You don't always want to be that.

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<v Speaker 3>You know, No, sometimes I don't want to tell you

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<v Speaker 3>the truth because you living on delusion is way more fun,

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<v Speaker 3>you know, like I had, I could picture it vividly.

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<v Speaker 3>It's like a friend would come to me for advice

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<v Speaker 3>and I would tell the truth in like the most

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<v Speaker 3>brutal way, because I like, this is my purpose, it's

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<v Speaker 3>my role. And now I'm like, come, you cheated on

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<v Speaker 3>your boyfriend won't cuddle. He was weird anyway, he didn't

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<v Speaker 3>right finger. You did write by yourself. You chose yourself.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, shout out.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm definitely the Ellen friend coming for a dawn. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>some inane chat.

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<v Speaker 2>You are the Ellen friend. It's a good it's a

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<v Speaker 2>very good skill to have.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm a lot less Ellen now that I have the

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<v Speaker 1>brown hair.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, that was a jump scare because I was expecting

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<v Speaker 3>blonde to come out and the way you just like

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<v Speaker 3>folded it backwards.

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<v Speaker 2>My eyes, my eyebrows a raised.

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<v Speaker 3>I was like, oh not what I will say though,

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<v Speaker 3>being the Ellen friend is a good skill because the

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<v Speaker 3>one great thing about through me, especially in like a

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<v Speaker 3>social context, she can maintain the vibe.

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<v Speaker 2>Like she's down.

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<v Speaker 3>And that's a very special characteristics because she never doing

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<v Speaker 3>too much. At least I never see you doing too much, right,

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<v Speaker 3>because I'm the opposite, Like I can start a vibe,

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<v Speaker 3>but I will never sustain. I'm like, you've got thirteen minutes.

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<v Speaker 3>I maybe cooked in the corner having it.

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<v Speaker 2>What do you call it? A d and M a

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<v Speaker 2>dn M or you're just vibing when you're like VI

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<v Speaker 2>just in your own space. Yeah, I'm like, this is great.

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<v Speaker 1>It was quite beautiful to be in your presence.

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<v Speaker 3>But we have different skills, and like, that's an amazing

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<v Speaker 3>skill of yours that I don't know. There's a full

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<v Speaker 3>bra on the ground. Remember that time fast forward when

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<v Speaker 3>sum is like I'm a particular person. Everything goes where

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<v Speaker 3>it should. I'm never messy.

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<v Speaker 2>I would have left out there.

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<v Speaker 4>You've been listening to the Flex and Frooms Daily Podcast

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<v Speaker 4>For more, tune int cater on DAB or stream it

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<v Speaker 4>on iHeartRadio.