WEBVTT - LIFE UNCUT RADIO SHOW - 7th May 0:00:00.880 --> 0:00:05.320 Life Uncut podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout 0:00:05.320 --> 0:00:09.120 Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We 0:00:09.160 --> 0:00:11.920 pay our respect to their elders past and present and 0:00:12.039 --> 0:00:15.280 extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Island 0:00:15.360 --> 0:00:16.120 peoples today. 0:00:16.320 --> 0:00:19.599 This episode is recorded on Gaddigal Land of the Aurora Nation. 0:00:39.159 --> 0:00:41.760 Hey guys, and I'll welcome back to another episode of 0:00:41.960 --> 0:00:45.360 Life Uncut. But this is our special Saturday edition. This 0:00:45.440 --> 0:00:48.120 is our radio show edition. This is where we bundle 0:00:48.200 --> 0:00:50.400 up the radio show from the Saturday. We put it 0:00:50.400 --> 0:00:52.320 into your feet, all the good juicy stuff that you want. 0:00:52.560 --> 0:00:55.240 And we are, of course because tomorrow is Mother's Day. 0:00:55.280 --> 0:00:57.920 We are talking about Mother's Day on today's radio show. 0:00:58.400 --> 0:00:59.920 It really did get a bit of a feature, but 0:01:00.120 --> 0:01:02.480 we do get into we talk about what are the 0:01:02.480 --> 0:01:04.800 worst Mother's Day gifts that you've ever been given if 0:01:04.840 --> 0:01:07.080 you're a mum, but also the worst Mother's Day gifts 0:01:07.080 --> 0:01:09.600 that sam y'all gave to your mum's And they sucked, 0:01:09.640 --> 0:01:10.560 is what I have to say about that. 0:01:10.560 --> 0:01:11.880 I mean, I had a pretty good one that I 0:01:11.920 --> 0:01:12.839 used to make for my mum. 0:01:12.720 --> 0:01:14.280 And I tell I'll talk about it later on, and 0:01:14.280 --> 0:01:17.600 then we somehow get onto talking about people who wanted 0:01:17.640 --> 0:01:20.640 to treasure their plus centa but also their breast milk, 0:01:20.680 --> 0:01:21.520 and things get a bit weird. 0:01:21.560 --> 0:01:24.040 You know, plus center, Laura is, it's a pretty there's 0:01:24.040 --> 0:01:27.080 pretty big industry in like saving your placenda something You 0:01:27.160 --> 0:01:29.760 bury it and have like a ceremony. Some people freeze it, 0:01:29.959 --> 0:01:32.240 eat it, some people put it into tablets, like. 0:01:32.240 --> 0:01:35.280 There is you can do. I'm pretty open minded when 0:01:35.280 --> 0:01:37.760 it comes to like if you want to grow a 0:01:37.800 --> 0:01:39.560 tree out of your placenta or the power to you 0:01:39.640 --> 0:01:42.080 like it doesn't affect me, It's not for me. I 0:01:42.120 --> 0:01:44.839 wouldn't do that with me and my kids. I haven't, 0:01:45.760 --> 0:01:48.400 but I understand why people do. And everyone's kind of 0:01:48.440 --> 0:01:51.120 you know, different strokes for different folks. Don't yack my yam, 0:01:51.520 --> 0:01:55.520 but I got usd something very unusual. If I would 0:01:55.680 --> 0:01:58.240 would do something with a woman's placenter and look, I 0:01:58.240 --> 0:01:58.720 had to say no. 0:01:58.800 --> 0:01:59.560 And it wasn't eat it. 0:02:00.160 --> 0:02:02.600 No, it wasn't eat someone else's plus. We do speak to. 0:02:02.560 --> 0:02:05.280 Jules Robinson from Married at First Sight. Jules does call 0:02:05.320 --> 0:02:06.560 in and have a cute little chat. 0:02:06.360 --> 0:02:08.520 With us, and we also speak to Ross Noble, who 0:02:08.600 --> 0:02:11.520 is an absolutely freaking hilarious comedian. If you don't know 0:02:11.560 --> 0:02:14.120 who he is, he is touring all across the country 0:02:14.160 --> 0:02:16.160 at the moment, and yeah, he's just a laugh and 0:02:16.160 --> 0:02:16.480 a half. 0:02:16.520 --> 0:02:19.919 He's actually so funny. You know those comedians that well, 0:02:19.960 --> 0:02:22.160 I mean, like somebody. There's a lot of people mixtery, 0:02:22.160 --> 0:02:23.440 our co hosts, he's one of them. But you know 0:02:23.480 --> 0:02:27.080 those comedians that within Ursula Carson was another one. Within 0:02:27.120 --> 0:02:29.080 a few minutes have been in the room, not even 0:02:29.120 --> 0:02:32.000 maybe one minute, you're already in hysterics. Do you know 0:02:32.080 --> 0:02:34.519 that they're going to be good? Everything they say is funny. 0:02:34.520 --> 0:02:35.760 They could pick up a pen and look at it 0:02:35.760 --> 0:02:37.880 and you're like, for some reason, this is hysterical. 0:02:37.960 --> 0:02:39.960 And Britt managed to offend him within the first two 0:02:39.960 --> 0:02:42.120 minutes by asking him how he knew if he was 0:02:42.160 --> 0:02:44.440 actually funny. I was like, I reready know if you're 0:02:44.440 --> 0:02:46.560 fining he's fuck. I never thought about it until now. 0:02:46.600 --> 0:02:49.119 But anyway, that is all coming up on today's radio show. 0:02:49.160 --> 0:02:51.440 We hope you love it, and if you didn't listen 0:02:51.480 --> 0:02:53.880 live this week, please listen live next week. We are 0:02:53.960 --> 0:02:56.360 on radio all across the country on the Kiss Network 0:02:56.560 --> 0:03:00.720 from ten am to twelve pm every single today. 0:03:01.080 --> 0:03:07.600 The Life on Cut Radio Show with Hockey and Laura burn. 0:03:06.520 --> 0:03:08.680 Around Australia, It's the Life on Cut Radio Show with 0:03:08.680 --> 0:03:10.799 Brittany Hockeley and Laura Burrn and on Mother's Day Eve. 0:03:10.840 --> 0:03:12.560 I don't think there's a more perfect guest to have 0:03:12.639 --> 0:03:16.040 in studio than the one the Armily Ross Noble, Hello. 0:03:16.520 --> 0:03:20.480 Which are you seeing that? I am man the mom's favorite. 0:03:21.160 --> 0:03:23.880 With that you do a lot of Brecky TV interviews 0:03:23.880 --> 0:03:25.920 and mums. I love Brecky TV. I always see him 0:03:25.919 --> 0:03:27.120 on breakfast Televion. 0:03:26.800 --> 0:03:29.000 To be fair, that's where I saw you. I'm a mum, 0:03:29.040 --> 0:03:30.919 and I saw you when you're in your bunker hanging 0:03:30.960 --> 0:03:33.919 out during COVID during the Brecky Morning crosses. 0:03:33.960 --> 0:03:35.960 What was that in the break This is a project? 0:03:36.440 --> 0:03:38.960 No, I think you were. Also, what do you get up. 0:03:39.080 --> 0:03:40.680 If you think that the project is? 0:03:41.080 --> 0:03:44.440 Sometimes a few glasses of wine? Also, the mummy wine 0:03:44.440 --> 0:03:45.240 culture is good. 0:03:45.880 --> 0:03:46.640 I'd like to say. 0:03:46.760 --> 0:03:50.000 The first time that I actually met Ross was about 0:03:50.000 --> 0:03:52.400 half an hour ago. He was down in the waiting room. 0:03:52.600 --> 0:03:54.680 I'm telling him Mitch and I went, I don't know 0:03:54.680 --> 0:03:57.520 if you clocked this. I hope you didn't. You had 0:03:57.520 --> 0:03:59.440 a face mask on. You're just waiting down in reception, 0:03:59.560 --> 0:04:01.720 and we didn't know because you're all covered up. And 0:04:01.880 --> 0:04:03.400 Mitch and I went down and we started talking to 0:04:03.440 --> 0:04:06.800 the receptionist about her donuts, talking about donuts, and we 0:04:06.800 --> 0:04:07.880 can clearly ignored you. 0:04:08.760 --> 0:04:09.360 We didn't know. 0:04:09.600 --> 0:04:11.080 This is also what we do to all of the 0:04:11.120 --> 0:04:13.080 stars that come here. We make them sit in reception 0:04:13.160 --> 0:04:15.240 for a long time and we. 0:04:14.920 --> 0:04:17.120 Them to be fair. I mean, I did come in 0:04:17.160 --> 0:04:19.719 and see you know, I mean, they said, you just 0:04:19.760 --> 0:04:22.839 have a seat, so I just sit down and and 0:04:22.920 --> 0:04:25.560 I'm sure I don't think I didn't actually set the 0:04:25.560 --> 0:04:30.000 receptionist pick up before to see it. He's right, And 0:04:30.040 --> 0:04:32.719 I just thought she just think, I mean, I was 0:04:32.720 --> 0:04:34.840 wearing a Faerce mask, but she just think I'm some 0:04:35.040 --> 0:04:38.280 blook who's washing off the street and just gone. Can 0:04:38.360 --> 0:04:40.880 I be on the radio to do just going? Yeah, 0:04:41.000 --> 0:04:43.039 just sit there to think that I get bored and 0:04:43.080 --> 0:04:43.400 then just. 0:04:43.520 --> 0:04:45.160 Leave and then the two hosts come down and just 0:04:45.200 --> 0:04:47.120 ignore you and talk about donuts. Anyway, Welcome to life. 0:04:47.160 --> 0:04:48.599 I cut, It's lovely to be. 0:04:48.760 --> 0:04:49.880 I want to kick start. 0:04:50.040 --> 0:04:52.800 Ross with something that I just always can't get my 0:04:52.839 --> 0:04:55.000 head around, and it's like, how do you know that 0:04:55.080 --> 0:04:57.360 you're funny when you when you're growing up? 0:04:57.880 --> 0:04:59.120 Are you not convinced? 0:04:59.160 --> 0:05:03.760 No, it sounds like it sounds like, am I going 0:05:03.839 --> 0:05:05.799 to have to sure, we're going to have to watch 0:05:05.880 --> 0:05:08.640 all of my previous stand up specials and kind of 0:05:08.640 --> 0:05:08.920 got one. 0:05:09.160 --> 0:05:10.760 It's not clicking yet exactly. 0:05:10.880 --> 0:05:13.520 My biggest fear is, and I asked Social Carlson, is 0:05:13.520 --> 0:05:15.320 recently my biggest feer is when I think of like 0:05:15.360 --> 0:05:17.160 getting up on the stage and doing a stand up comedy, 0:05:17.160 --> 0:05:18.719 which is why I don't. But it's like, what if 0:05:18.760 --> 0:05:21.160 you thought you're funny but you're not? But what like, 0:05:21.200 --> 0:05:23.240 what was your job before being a comedian and how 0:05:23.240 --> 0:05:25.720 did you go? You know what, I'm actually funny enough 0:05:26.320 --> 0:05:27.400 for people to pay to see me? 0:05:27.680 --> 0:05:31.320 Right, Okay, well I'd never questioned that until now. But 0:05:31.640 --> 0:05:33.880 but weirdly, your friend of the scene of talent, that 0:05:34.040 --> 0:05:38.919 is probably going to destroy my career. Well it was 0:05:38.960 --> 0:05:41.520 slightly different for me because I started doing stand up 0:05:41.520 --> 0:05:44.360 when I was there fifteen, I was a small child. 0:05:44.360 --> 0:05:48.120 I was like the Shirley Temple of comedy. And the 0:05:48.160 --> 0:05:51.800 way you find out is basically you go on stage 0:05:52.240 --> 0:05:54.720 and you do five minutes like an open make thing, 0:05:55.120 --> 0:05:58.680 and if the audience laugh, then boom, that's you get 0:05:58.839 --> 0:06:01.360 another five minutes. Then you got ten minutes, then twenty minutes, 0:06:01.400 --> 0:06:03.960 and then you start doing like festival shows, and then 0:06:04.000 --> 0:06:07.080 you start touring and you in the work begats work. 0:06:07.200 --> 0:06:11.360 So yeah, you go on stage and they audience go 0:06:11.440 --> 0:06:15.000 oh that's a funny person, or you die horribly and 0:06:15.040 --> 0:06:17.280 you have to decide whether you push on with it 0:06:17.680 --> 0:06:20.120 or whether or not you So yeah, there's a point 0:06:20.160 --> 0:06:22.680 where that's what's great about stand up is the fact 0:06:22.680 --> 0:06:25.240 that it's not like you know, you sometimes get pop 0:06:25.240 --> 0:06:28.320 stars and what have you who they can't really sing, 0:06:28.400 --> 0:06:30.280 but they auder tune. They're in the right place the 0:06:30.480 --> 0:06:32.640 right time is sort of you know what I mean, 0:06:32.640 --> 0:06:35.680 whereas we start yeah, and. 0:06:35.600 --> 0:06:38.360 You're like you are the next start, I've got that 0:06:38.400 --> 0:06:38.640 on me. 0:06:38.800 --> 0:06:42.000 Sad, But you know, it's that thing if you literally 0:06:42.040 --> 0:06:43.920 you go on stage in front of a room full 0:06:43.920 --> 0:06:46.880 of people and you start talking and if they laugh, 0:06:47.480 --> 0:06:50.320 that's you know, it works. If they don't, you're out 0:06:50.360 --> 0:06:53.600 the door, and that's it's brutal and it's hard, but 0:06:53.680 --> 0:06:56.240 that's what's brilliant aout because you can't fake it science. 0:06:56.320 --> 0:07:00.760 So exactly, why didn't I just say that baptism, sure. 0:07:00.839 --> 0:07:05.359 Science, You're on the apprentice? What is or what is harder? 0:07:05.480 --> 0:07:08.760 Reality TV? Doing that and going through the process of 0:07:08.839 --> 0:07:11.680 reality TV or doing stand up comedy. 0:07:11.840 --> 0:07:14.920 Stand up comedy? But you know, well, it depends really. 0:07:15.000 --> 0:07:18.680 I mean with stand up comedy, you're you're like the writer, 0:07:19.040 --> 0:07:21.960 the performer, the director. If I'm standing on stage and 0:07:22.000 --> 0:07:24.720 I think of an idea, I go, here's an idea, bye, 0:07:24.760 --> 0:07:26.800 and I run with it, and the audience go, we 0:07:27.000 --> 0:07:30.920 like that. We're on board. Doing a celebrity apprentice, you go, 0:07:31.440 --> 0:07:33.880 here's an idea, and then a load of people around 0:07:33.920 --> 0:07:37.160 you go, oh what, hey, what do you do? What 0:07:37.160 --> 0:07:38.880 do you mean by I don't think that's a very 0:07:38.880 --> 0:07:41.800 good idea? And then you have to convince them and 0:07:41.800 --> 0:07:45.160 then he goes through all this process and that's frustrated. 0:07:45.360 --> 0:07:46.920 But what about when you watch it all back, were 0:07:46.960 --> 0:07:49.360 you not just like, oh, that didn't happen, or was 0:07:49.360 --> 0:07:50.600 it pretty true to life? 0:07:50.800 --> 0:07:52.600 Or you like, I could have been funnier there. 0:07:53.480 --> 0:07:55.920 Oh, there was plenty of stuff where I went, WHOA, 0:07:56.040 --> 0:07:57.280 where's my job? 0:07:58.360 --> 0:07:59.800 I always cut the good stuff. 0:07:59.520 --> 0:08:05.160 Out, certainly, on the certainly in the boardroom where you know, 0:08:05.280 --> 0:08:07.280 Lord Sugar hasked to be very satin. They would come 0:08:07.280 --> 0:08:09.440 in and see, can you be more serious? They cut 0:08:09.480 --> 0:08:12.240 a bit out right. So we're in the boardroom and 0:08:12.280 --> 0:08:16.520 we'd had to do this Budgy Smugglers fashion period, right, 0:08:16.960 --> 0:08:20.920 and so on my team, I had a former Hugo 0:08:21.040 --> 0:08:26.200 boss model guy who's Divigeny, a survivor, right, absolutely ripped. 0:08:26.280 --> 0:08:29.880 I had the Veronicas, two beautiful women, Michelle Bridges who 0:08:30.440 --> 0:08:34.920 you know indible and Sherry Lee Biggs who's a former 0:08:35.040 --> 0:08:38.520 Miss Universe, right, absolutely stunning. And they said, you need 0:08:38.520 --> 0:08:41.080 some people to model the stuff and some people, and 0:08:41.120 --> 0:08:43.920 we need somebody to be the MC. And now, look, 0:08:44.600 --> 0:08:47.160 I don't know if you've ever been in business, but 0:08:47.240 --> 0:08:50.040 I would suggest I would make the best MC and 0:08:50.160 --> 0:08:52.760 let the people who you know are professional models model 0:08:52.840 --> 0:08:55.240 Buddie Smugglers. So I said it, know, in certain terms, 0:08:55.320 --> 0:08:57.600 I'm not wearing that, like I'm not wandering around with 0:08:57.600 --> 0:09:00.320 Budgie Smugglers. And then we get in the boardroom, Lord 0:09:00.440 --> 0:09:04.280 Sugar says to me, he goes, he's suggesting that I 0:09:04.320 --> 0:09:09.160 was a bit too shy to where the psychology say 0:09:09.160 --> 0:09:10.880 you know what I mean, like he said, And the thing, 0:09:10.960 --> 0:09:13.360 it's just that, like I'll happily wander around in my pack. 0:09:13.520 --> 0:09:15.480 In fact, I was dropping my trousers in the in 0:09:15.559 --> 0:09:18.920 the in the episode. The next episode dropped me trousers anyway, 0:09:18.920 --> 0:09:21.079 So that's so he goes, was you a bit too 0:09:21.120 --> 0:09:23.280 shy to wear the budget smoke? And they edited this 0:09:23.360 --> 0:09:26.200 out right, I said to him in the boardroom, because 0:09:26.240 --> 0:09:28.320 you're not allowed to be funny in the boardroom, so 0:09:28.440 --> 0:09:32.079 I said, And everyone the rest of the contestants were 0:09:32.200 --> 0:09:35.679 literally doubled over laughing when I said this, And they 0:09:35.720 --> 0:09:38.000 have to stop the groun and see, dudes, I said, 0:09:38.480 --> 0:09:40.240 you know what, Lord Sugar, he said, is a bit 0:09:40.240 --> 0:09:42.480 too shy to wear budget smugglers in front of everyone? 0:09:42.559 --> 0:09:45.120 I went, you know what, Lord Sugar, if it pleases 0:09:45.200 --> 0:09:47.920 you right now, I will happily put my cock and 0:09:48.000 --> 0:09:58.280 ball on this everyone anywhere. And everyone just wed, you 0:09:58.280 --> 0:10:02.960 can do it now, so hopefully you beat that. Yeah, 0:10:04.040 --> 0:10:06.360 And then it got edited from the final thing. I 0:10:06.400 --> 0:10:07.640 will happily put. 0:10:08.440 --> 0:10:11.960 What Lord Sugar's reaction because I think there's a lot 0:10:12.000 --> 0:10:13.839 obviously there's a lot cut out that we don't see. 0:10:14.200 --> 0:10:15.040 When you do that. 0:10:15.200 --> 0:10:18.320 Does he do you get him, do you break him down? 0:10:18.360 --> 0:10:20.880 Does he actually start laughing or is he angry that 0:10:20.920 --> 0:10:22.600 you have suggested such a thing. 0:10:22.720 --> 0:10:25.280 You know what happened in that situation. He actually went 0:10:25.440 --> 0:10:31.520 everyone's businessmself, everyone's busines themselves laughing, and he actually didn't 0:10:31.559 --> 0:10:35.079 hear what I said, and he went what And then 0:10:35.080 --> 0:10:37.240 he's like what, And I'm thinking, do I have to 0:10:37.280 --> 0:10:40.760 see this again? Turn around? You just put your hand out. 0:10:40.600 --> 0:10:43.560 Sweetheart, He's saying multiple times. 0:10:43.760 --> 0:10:47.640 And then I said, when when we were they cut 0:10:47.679 --> 0:10:50.280 this out as well. Some of the other contestants were 0:10:50.280 --> 0:10:53.320 seeing there, what do we call Lord Sugar? What do 0:10:53.360 --> 0:10:55.360 we call And I said, well, you know, you can 0:10:55.400 --> 0:10:58.600 call him your lordship, you can call him Lord Sugar. 0:10:58.760 --> 0:11:02.880 I said, but in you care, everyone tends to call 0:11:02.960 --> 0:11:04.000 them sugar tits. 0:11:07.880 --> 0:11:09.080 You know, people call him. 0:11:12.640 --> 0:11:17.400 I just thought it would be be hilarious if somebody 0:11:17.480 --> 0:11:20.400 walked in and just just welcome to the show, all right, 0:11:21.559 --> 0:11:25.280 and you're fired, and you know, so stuff stuff like that. 0:11:25.320 --> 0:11:28.600 It's it's mainly for time, but also you know, you've 0:11:28.600 --> 0:11:31.040 got to be you've got to be respectful to the boss. 0:11:31.600 --> 0:11:36.120 They also cut out the other things there was hour. Honestly, 0:11:36.240 --> 0:11:38.079 there was hours and hours of stuff. 0:11:38.120 --> 0:11:40.480 There was one you didn't get enough air time. 0:11:40.480 --> 0:11:43.520 It's what I'm getting loads. But that was just the 0:11:43.559 --> 0:11:45.920 stuff that when we first went, I was the first 0:11:45.960 --> 0:11:48.120 person in. We're all you know, you walk into the 0:11:48.240 --> 0:11:50.360 boardroom and there's a little clip of this out there, 0:11:50.360 --> 0:11:52.319 but it wasn't on the main show. So I was 0:11:52.360 --> 0:11:54.560 the first person in there. And then so it's just 0:11:54.640 --> 0:11:56.680 me by myself, so obviously I've got no one to 0:11:56.720 --> 0:11:58.760 talk to. So I walked in. I said, oh, this 0:11:58.840 --> 0:12:01.400 is quite nice, and I think I'll go in the boardroom, right, 0:12:01.800 --> 0:12:05.640 So I went into the boardroom by myself, and I 0:12:05.640 --> 0:12:07.679 think there's a little click of this online somewhere. So 0:12:07.720 --> 0:12:10.920 I get in Lord Sugar's chair and I start pretending 0:12:11.000 --> 0:12:14.200 of it. I'm going, you're bloody fied, you're blady bladdy, 0:12:14.280 --> 0:12:15.400 bladdy bladdy fired. 0:12:15.640 --> 0:12:17.400 And he stopped back, watching me like this guy is 0:12:17.400 --> 0:12:17.960 the first to go. 0:12:18.080 --> 0:12:20.360 And then I was spinning around, and then I was 0:12:20.400 --> 0:12:23.320 sliding past the camera and I would appear one side 0:12:23.320 --> 0:12:27.280 and the slide your bladdy fire. And I didn't realize 0:12:27.360 --> 0:12:32.400 he was upstairs watching me, like in the boardroom, messing 0:12:32.440 --> 0:12:35.360 about and then as we were leaving he said, he 0:12:35.440 --> 0:12:37.520 went right off, you go first task. And as we 0:12:37.600 --> 0:12:39.720 were leaving in the edit that this out, he went, 0:12:39.840 --> 0:12:44.160 and Ross, don't you ever ever mess about in my 0:12:44.440 --> 0:12:47.080 chair again? And as I was leaving and I went, 0:12:47.480 --> 0:12:50.200 I went, I was just checking it, you know, help 0:12:50.280 --> 0:12:55.040 and see it. But like I said, there's probably I reckon. 0:12:55.080 --> 0:12:59.400 There's probably four or five days worth of daft stuff 0:12:59.800 --> 0:13:00.640 just didn't meet. 0:13:01.480 --> 0:13:03.040 But you know, I want to talk to you about 0:13:03.040 --> 0:13:06.360 something more serious and about a physical aspect. Yeah, I 0:13:06.440 --> 0:13:08.760 want to know if you've been taking up like self 0:13:08.800 --> 0:13:11.440 defense classes or jiu jitsu or anything. With everything happening 0:13:11.440 --> 0:13:13.600 in the world right now, I'm talking. I'm talking what's 0:13:13.640 --> 0:13:16.440 happened with Chris Rock and Will Smith. Just this week, 0:13:16.679 --> 0:13:20.040 Dave Chappelle Javell was stormed on stage. There was an 0:13:20.120 --> 0:13:23.440 arm baken because because people are not feel well, people 0:13:23.440 --> 0:13:25.920 are not liking jokes anymore, and there's this culture and 0:13:25.960 --> 0:13:27.959 they're feeling like that they can jump on stage and 0:13:28.040 --> 0:13:28.480 attack you. 0:13:28.559 --> 0:13:28.679 Now. 0:13:29.400 --> 0:13:31.559 Is this a worry for you now? 0:13:31.679 --> 0:13:34.800 And do you happened happened to you? 0:13:34.960 --> 0:13:35.040 Oh? 0:13:35.120 --> 0:13:37.640 Yeah, I've had that. The best example of it was 0:13:38.200 --> 0:13:41.679 I I was doing in Prague, of all place, I 0:13:41.880 --> 0:13:42.680 was just such. 0:13:42.520 --> 0:13:43.800 A gentle, beautiful place. 0:13:45.160 --> 0:13:49.000 Exactly probably, and I was I was splitting a sort of. 0:13:49.720 --> 0:13:52.679 I was split in an old communist hall in Prague, 0:13:53.120 --> 0:13:56.800 and there was these the gig was sponsored by a 0:13:56.920 --> 0:13:59.640 beer company, and they had these sort of sacks, these 0:13:59.679 --> 0:14:01.760 sort of they were meant to look like rustic sacks 0:14:01.800 --> 0:14:03.880 at the side of the stage. And I picked one 0:14:03.920 --> 0:14:06.319 of these up and I threw it at a guy 0:14:06.400 --> 0:14:08.800 in the front row. I'd been talking to him and 0:14:09.040 --> 0:14:11.920 he don't He's kind of been heckling, and I sort 0:14:11.960 --> 0:14:15.120 of said, do you want a pillow fight? And I 0:14:15.360 --> 0:14:18.520 just I just threw this. I threw this because I 0:14:18.559 --> 0:14:20.880 thought we've got a couple of They looked like big pillows, 0:14:20.920 --> 0:14:22.160 and I thought that would be a bit of fun. 0:14:24.080 --> 0:14:27.240 Here's what here's the mistake that I made. One I 0:14:27.560 --> 0:14:30.600 didn't I knocked over all the drinks on his table 0:14:30.840 --> 0:14:35.120 right two. In the Czech Republic, pillow fighting isn't really 0:14:35.240 --> 0:14:41.120 a thing, no, And also he didn't speak brilliant English 0:14:41.640 --> 0:14:43.840 and all he was I knocked his drinks over and 0:14:43.920 --> 0:14:46.680 he heard the word fight. So the next thing, you know, 0:14:47.040 --> 0:14:52.000 this guy climbs on stage, and I'm and he tries 0:14:52.120 --> 0:14:55.600 to punch me, and I swerve him and I sort 0:14:55.640 --> 0:14:57.800 of get him in a like sort of a lock, 0:14:58.160 --> 0:15:01.320 and then he's on my back and I'm holding his 0:15:01.720 --> 0:15:05.760 arms like that to stop and punching me in the kidneys, 0:15:05.920 --> 0:15:11.240 and he's riding me around the steams like a fucking bronco. No, 0:15:11.480 --> 0:15:15.240 that's exactly. So there was two security guards, both check guys, 0:15:15.880 --> 0:15:19.120 and they were laughing because they're going like, oh, we've 0:15:19.200 --> 0:15:22.600 never seen stand up comedy before, and they thought it 0:15:22.720 --> 0:15:24.320 was part of it. So they're laughing their heads. And 0:15:24.440 --> 0:15:27.320 then the audience started laughing, and I'm going, no, no, this, 0:15:27.680 --> 0:15:34.080 this isn't part of the show. In Heim licked around 0:15:34.120 --> 0:15:36.440 the stage and the other acts. I looked into the 0:15:36.680 --> 0:15:39.000 and the other acts were laughing so hard. 0:15:39.160 --> 0:15:41.280 What I like about it is that you started it. 0:15:41.400 --> 0:15:44.720 You threw something, So. 0:15:45.040 --> 0:15:47.360 That's that's happened. I had a woman just recently. I 0:15:47.440 --> 0:15:51.640 had a woman who was she had too much to drink. 0:15:51.760 --> 0:15:54.760 She'd fallen asleep and the game and I just went 0:15:54.920 --> 0:15:57.200 look at her I was talking about as she woke up, 0:15:57.280 --> 0:15:59.920 and she went, stop taking a piss out of me, 0:16:00.160 --> 0:16:02.680 and I went, you're asleep, but the gig next thing, 0:16:02.720 --> 0:16:04.880 you know, she she climbed on stage, but she was 0:16:04.920 --> 0:16:08.520 so drunk she couldn't stand up. So she was crawling around. 0:16:08.240 --> 0:16:10.400 The sticks, trying to get you, trying to get me. 0:16:10.600 --> 0:16:12.800 And I was I was more worried about catching cover 0:16:12.920 --> 0:16:15.200 off than anything else which I have ever seen that. 0:16:15.360 --> 0:16:16.960 You know, one man and his dog, but he used 0:16:16.960 --> 0:16:19.080 to do the sheepdog trials and it would be, you know, 0:16:19.240 --> 0:16:22.880 like babe and all that. And so she's crawling around 0:16:22.920 --> 0:16:25.520 the stick, she can't stand up, and I'm whistling, I'm 0:16:25.520 --> 0:16:29.840 going good bye, good bye, come by. That's it, good bye, 0:16:29.920 --> 0:16:32.440 good bye like that, and the audience just laughing their 0:16:32.480 --> 0:16:32.840 heads off. 0:16:33.720 --> 0:16:35.960 You need to capitalize on a situation when it presents 0:16:36.040 --> 0:16:37.000 itself exactly, but. 0:16:37.160 --> 0:16:39.800 No, stop it. Like Chappelle, it's just you know, I 0:16:39.880 --> 0:16:42.000 know he said things that some people don't like, but 0:16:42.560 --> 0:16:44.360 don't attack people physically. 0:16:44.640 --> 0:16:47.920 Who what's going on? I think the world has going crazy? 0:16:48.280 --> 0:16:50.320 It has. And also if you have to, if you 0:16:50.400 --> 0:16:52.520 have to change your jokes, we'll be fearful on stage 0:16:52.520 --> 0:16:54.560 about getting into a bit of strife. 0:16:54.680 --> 0:16:57.400 Oh look, it's one of those things where, like you know, 0:16:57.720 --> 0:17:00.120 you should you've got to take responsibility for what you 0:17:00.200 --> 0:17:02.160 say on steer. I'm not one of these I'm not 0:17:02.240 --> 0:17:04.800 one of these people that just go, oh, you can't 0:17:04.840 --> 0:17:06.919 see anything anymore. It's like, well, you know what, if 0:17:06.960 --> 0:17:10.200 you're on stage and you've got a platform and you're 0:17:10.800 --> 0:17:14.000 you know, you're being mean or race just a homophobic 0:17:14.119 --> 0:17:16.359 or whatever, You've got to think about that sort of stuff. 0:17:16.359 --> 0:17:18.399 You've got to take you know. And I've said stuff 0:17:18.440 --> 0:17:19.879 in the past that you sort of look at and 0:17:19.880 --> 0:17:21.840 now anything maybe that's. 0:17:21.800 --> 0:17:23.640 You know, that was a bit it's a different time, 0:17:23.760 --> 0:17:24.320 you know what I mean. 0:17:24.520 --> 0:17:26.680 Yeah, you know, at the time you think that's maybe 0:17:26.720 --> 0:17:28.560 that's except but now you're looking at you know, and 0:17:28.640 --> 0:17:30.959 you've got a change and evolve, and I think that's important. 0:17:30.960 --> 0:17:34.080 But at the same time, should never be should never 0:17:34.160 --> 0:17:37.000 be punched in the face for it. But I quite 0:17:37.119 --> 0:17:40.560 like the idea that maybe in the future we get 0:17:40.600 --> 0:17:45.320 to a situation where boxing is no longer you're not 0:17:45.400 --> 0:17:49.440 allowed to actually hit each other. You have to you 0:17:49.560 --> 0:17:51.560 go see a big match and you just talking out. 0:17:51.680 --> 0:17:57.159 You know, I have one question for you. We are 0:17:57.359 --> 0:17:59.680 last last question. I think round it out. You want 0:17:59.720 --> 0:18:03.800 to need my mom? Okay, why not. Oh yeah, to 0:18:03.880 --> 0:18:05.399 be honest, we make it a. 0:18:09.520 --> 0:18:09.720 Ross. 0:18:09.760 --> 0:18:12.119 I have a question for you. Now I've been holding 0:18:12.160 --> 0:18:15.639 something in my hand. It does look this is the 0:18:15.720 --> 0:18:18.080 question we are we have a Oh my god? 0:18:18.400 --> 0:18:18.600 Is that? 0:18:18.800 --> 0:18:19.080 You know what? 0:18:19.640 --> 0:18:21.800 If this is a new If this is a new 0:18:21.960 --> 0:18:24.240 radio thing that you've come up with, it could be 0:18:24.880 --> 0:18:27.639 the greatest radio feature ever or it could be terrible. 0:18:27.680 --> 0:18:30.800 But let's is this dill do or not? A where you? 0:18:31.400 --> 0:18:33.560 Is this where you called up a selection? 0:18:34.720 --> 0:18:35.480 I'm gonna. 0:18:39.359 --> 0:18:41.359 This is something that I just picked up in the 0:18:41.440 --> 0:18:43.879 office and I didn't even know what it was. And 0:18:44.240 --> 0:18:48.000 we are predominantly we have a very women's focused podcast, 0:18:48.520 --> 0:18:50.800 and I wanted to give this to you, and I 0:18:50.840 --> 0:18:52.720