Speaker 1: I would like to acknowledge the traditional owners of the
Speaker 1: land on which this episode is being recorded, the Komboo
Speaker 1: Marry people. We pay our respects to elders past, present
Speaker 1: and emerging and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and
Speaker 1: Torres Strait Islander peoples. Today I'm your host, Georgie Stevenson,
Speaker 1: and this is the Rise and Conquer podcast. This is
Speaker 1: the podcast where we ch have mindset, self development and
Speaker 1: becoming your higher self mix soon with a lot of laughs,
Speaker 1: plus behind the scenes of my life running two businesses
Speaker 1: and being among Think of us as the perfect combo
Speaker 1: of brunch with your besties mixed with self developments. No
Speaker 1: matter where you are in your journey, We're here to
Speaker 1: help you be curious, pull yourself out, and embrace radical
Speaker 1: self awareness. If you're ready to get into the driver's
Speaker 1: seat of your own life and stop letting life past
Speaker 1: you by, then you're in the right place.
Speaker 2: Hey everyone, Happy Friday. Today we have a hotline episode
Speaker 2: for you. We are answering two of the community questions
Speaker 2: touching on some common themes. First, we are chatting about
Speaker 2: relationship dynamics when it comes to house deposits. Does it
Speaker 2: need to be fifty to fifty or can you do
Speaker 2: other things? We also touch on managing other family members'
Speaker 2: opinions about this. Next, we talk about how long you
Speaker 2: should wait for someone to propose and how to avoid
Speaker 2: comparing yourself to others. Let's get straight into the episode.
Speaker 3: Hey Cooper, welcome back.
Speaker 4: Hello everyone, good to be back.
Speaker 3: We're excited to have you. I've got some fun hotline
Speaker 3: questions today, so I'll get straight into the first one.
Speaker 3: My partner and I are planning on buying our first
Speaker 3: home together, which is really exciting. We both currently live
Speaker 3: at home and have never lived with anyone before. I
Speaker 3: currently have more money saved than my partner, as he
Speaker 3: would have around forty percent for a deposit and I
Speaker 3: have sixty percent. I was totally fine with this not
Speaker 3: being fifty to fifty, as I believe what goes around
Speaker 3: comes around, and I don't feel everything with money needs
Speaker 3: to be equal to be fair. However, my parents think otherwise.
Speaker 3: My mum is super against this and feels we need
Speaker 3: to be fifty to fifty in case something happens and
Speaker 3: we split up, because then he will get half of
Speaker 3: everything he didn't put exactly half in. Is this manifesting
Speaker 3: bad energy. Also, could this be to do with limiting
Speaker 3: beliefs around money that she holds? Would you guys go
Speaker 3: fifty to fifty or just put whatever you have saved together? Also,
Speaker 3: just to note, he is not lazy or anything. He
Speaker 3: runs his own company and one of the reasons he
Speaker 3: has less is because he has invested more than I
Speaker 3: have ever saved into this company and hasn't earned it
Speaker 3: back yet. I just want to disclose we're not financial advisors.
Speaker 3: We're very much talking about this from an energetics perspective.
Speaker 3: But what are your thoughts and feelings? I guess almost
Speaker 3: in like a manifesting energetics abundance perspective on this situation.
Speaker 2: Yes, all right, So let's just start with what your
Speaker 2: parents are saying. And you're bringing this up to yourself,
Speaker 2: and you're saying to yourself that it's you don't mind,
Speaker 2: like just it's okay to be honest, like it it
Speaker 2: is something. Otherwise if it wasn't, you would.
Speaker 4: Ask the question.
Speaker 2: So true, it's all good, Like it's fine. It's very
Speaker 2: natural because in a relationship it should be fifty to fifty,
Speaker 2: but like fifty to fifty to me in a relationship
Speaker 2: is any number, Like I can come home and I
Speaker 2: can be a ten and Ash can be the ninety.
Speaker 2: So it's all about compensation and just being there for
Speaker 2: one another. And this is very like listen to your intuition,
Speaker 2: like if this, if your partner is the one and
Speaker 2: you're feeling really good about this, like go with it.
Speaker 2: Your parents are just trying to protect you, absolutely. Yeah,
Speaker 2: so they're not giving you bad advice. They just they're
Speaker 2: thinking of the worst possible thing, and that's if you
Speaker 2: split up, you're not going to get your money back.
Speaker 2: But yeah, if you think about that sort of thing
Speaker 2: and keep thinking about it, it's going to be a
Speaker 2: problem because you're going to manifest it.
Speaker 3: So it kind of is manifesting bad energy if you
Speaker 3: focus on that.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, definitely.
Speaker 2: So like you kind of answered your question a bit
Speaker 2: and you're on the right path and you're doing really good.
Speaker 2: But like with your parents, it might be a conversation
Speaker 2: you're going to have them and say, I really appreciate
Speaker 2: you giving me this advice. I'm going to take it
Speaker 2: into consideration. But I've got it. I've got this. This
Speaker 2: is my life and I'm very confident with my partner
Speaker 2: like we're not going to split up, We're going to
Speaker 2: work things out. It will come around. Plus it's just money,
Speaker 2: like I would, yeah, get too focused on money when
Speaker 2: the bigger picture is you want to be together and
Speaker 2: be good together and feel the emotions and go through everything.
Speaker 2: And yeah, and he knows that. He knows he's not
Speaker 2: putting a lot in, so it's going to fuel him.
Speaker 2: So there's so much good to this. And it's to
Speaker 2: put those boundaries up with your parents, because.
Speaker 4: I've had the sact same thing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, not the exact same thing, but they've done it
Speaker 2: in so many different ways to parentose.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but I feel like that's also parents, Like even
Speaker 3: my friends have gone through similar things where your parents
Speaker 3: do sometimes jump to the worst possible outcome because they
Speaker 3: want to make sure that you're okay no matter what.
Speaker 3: And that is like as if you're okay in the
Speaker 3: worst possible outcome, then you'll find no matter what. And
Speaker 3: I think it's just yeah, like you said, acknowledging that
Speaker 3: that's where they're coming from and telling them like, hey,
Speaker 3: it's all good.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Like imagine if you did it and his businessiness
Speaker 2: went off, Yeah, and he had a heap of money
Speaker 2: or something.
Speaker 3: And he does the center of the next house.
Speaker 2: Or well he might do one hundred percent. Yeah, you
Speaker 2: might be a home like. It's just not a good
Speaker 2: practice to be fixated on money, as bigger and better
Speaker 2: things to be focused on. And if there is money problems,
Speaker 2: listen to the book How to be a Badass of
Speaker 2: Making Money or a happy pocket full of Money.
Speaker 1: We're just taking a quick break in today's podcast to
Speaker 1: let you know about our brand new course, Find your Voice,
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Speaker 1: the episode.
Speaker 3: Okay, so our second question, Hey all, wanting to know
Speaker 3: how to keep a high vibration when feeling disappointed and impatient.
Speaker 3: My partner and I have been together for almost four
Speaker 3: years and we are happier and more in love than ever.
Speaker 3: We talk about marriage and children all the time and
Speaker 3: both note this is what we want with each other.
Speaker 3: But I can't help but feel upset at the fact
Speaker 3: he hasn't yet proposed. I get frustrated and upset seeing
Speaker 3: everyone else get engaged and disappointed that it has not
Speaker 3: happened yet for us. I get worried that people look
Speaker 3: at me and think I mean an unhappy relationship or
Speaker 3: he must not love me because we are not yet engaged,
Speaker 3: And to be honest, it's sometimes how I feel. I'm
Speaker 3: so proud to be with him and want the whole
Speaker 3: world to know, Yet I feel like because he hasn't
Speaker 3: proposed to me, it means he isn't proud to show
Speaker 3: that I'm his for life to everyone he knows. I
Speaker 3: know we are not engaged because of money and because
Speaker 3: we want that time in our life to be special
Speaker 3: and abundant, not forced and on a budget. But I
Speaker 3: just can't help but feel so impatient for having to
Speaker 3: wait so long for something I want and deserve, especially
Speaker 3: when everyone else has it and I don't. I'm twenty
Speaker 3: five and I'm ready any advice. This song was also
Speaker 3: from our Facebook group guys, so be sure to hop.
Speaker 4: In there if you're not good.
Speaker 2: Question, I'm kind of feeling that. Yeah, like let's start
Speaker 2: where like how he is feeling. So this is just
Speaker 2: a good conversation that needs to happen between one another.
Speaker 2: Where like I've said, to give him the safe space,
Speaker 2: get on his level and understand why he is maybe
Speaker 2: afraid do it. So like when someone is being pushed
Speaker 2: into something, can forced you know, it's too much, Like, yeah,
Speaker 2: I don't want to be forced into something. It's going
Speaker 2: to just feel natural. And so like to start with yourself,
Speaker 2: like try not to put so much pressure on yourself
Speaker 2: to be in there from other people, Like stay in
Speaker 2: your own lane, do what you're what you're doing. And
Speaker 2: at the time, right now isn't the right time. And yeah,
Speaker 2: trust the universe that maybe if you did it right
Speaker 2: now it might not turn out right. So you're on
Speaker 2: the right path and you're on the right journey right now.
Speaker 2: And to enjoy now not being married, try and look
Speaker 2: at it, at it in that era, in that way of.
Speaker 3: And like not having kids, like just make the most
Speaker 3: of it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like be together and not have that burden of
Speaker 2: doing what stereotypically everyone else is doing. Like be in
Speaker 2: the moment of what you can both do to together
Speaker 2: when you're not married.
Speaker 4: I don't know I.
Speaker 3: Would even say it sounds like to me, it sounds
Speaker 3: like she's had the conversation and they've decided not to
Speaker 3: get engaged or married yet because they want that time
Speaker 3: to not be stressful about money or like worried about
Speaker 3: finances and they know they're not there yet or where
Speaker 3: they want to be yet. But I'd ask if that's
Speaker 3: actually how you feel now, because if you've decided with
Speaker 3: him not to get engaged until you'll feel abundant doing it,
Speaker 3: but you're upset about not being engaged, is it that
Speaker 3: maybe being engaged means more to you now, whether you're
Speaker 3: financially abundant or not.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Like they're all excuses.
Speaker 2: So you need to just have a good conversation together
Speaker 2: and ask him why because there's a lot of assumptions
Speaker 2: and there's a lot of feelings of pressure on yourself
Speaker 2: and let like have a deep conversation and say these
Speaker 2: are my feelings towards it, like this is where I'm at.
Speaker 2: Where are you at? Like whatever it is doesn't matter,
Speaker 2: Like I'm here for you, like I want to be
Speaker 2: with you. There's no pressure, like there's to give him
Speaker 2: that safe space and say like it's all good and
Speaker 2: there's no pressure. It's like whatever you're feeling, like understand
Speaker 2: why he hasn't done it, Like there's a reason communication
Speaker 2: is so powerful and we don't use it because we
Speaker 2: get so consumed in our head. Oh what about if
Speaker 2: he says something I don't want to hear. It's better
Speaker 2: to know because the assumption in your head usually is worse.
Speaker 2: But if it's his questions worse, like at least you'll know,
Speaker 2: like have that conversation with him, and then when you know,
Speaker 2: if he says, oh, like I'm just not quite ready yet.
Speaker 2: I just want to do a few more things, like
Speaker 2: it's probably not anything even to do with her, Like
Speaker 2: it's something else. I think there's something going on in
Speaker 2: his head and you just need to get there with him.
Speaker 2: And it would be a struggle and it might be
Speaker 2: hard to get it out of him. But like keep
Speaker 2: saying stuff, keep talking to him and give him the
Speaker 2: support and keep saying why yeah, Like keep saying like
Speaker 2: why do you feel like that? Oh, that's that's really hard. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I feel that pressure from everyone else too, and be
Speaker 2: with him like he's your partner together.
Speaker 3: I think also she needs clarity on what she actually
Speaker 3: wants from this question. It sounds like she's very clouded
Speaker 3: focusing on where everyone else is at yea and I focusing.
Speaker 3: She's focusing so much on like other people's timelines and
Speaker 3: other people getting engaged and married and having kids and
Speaker 3: all the things, And it's like you need to almost
Speaker 3: tune that noise out and go, am I actually happy
Speaker 3: not being engaged right now? Am I actually happy not
Speaker 3: being married and not having kids yet? Or is this
Speaker 3: something that I truly want internally right now? I want kids?
Speaker 3: And actually get clear on that, because sometimes you can
Speaker 3: just get so overwhelmed with social media, like just noise
Speaker 3: from everywhere on where you should be at, that you
Speaker 3: can confuse that and think that's what you want when
Speaker 3: it's actually not what you want, And as soon as
Speaker 3: you sit down and think about what you actually want,
Speaker 3: it's not that.
Speaker 2: Yes, social media that is not the best thing from it.
Speaker 4: Like I've had a pretty big detox with social media.
Speaker 3: You have, you've done really well.
Speaker 2: I've done months and months. I have come back on
Speaker 2: it and I follow twenty people now, so there's like
Speaker 2: not much on it and I look at it a
Speaker 2: little bit and I just think, oh, it's anyway come
Speaker 2: out and it's very specific. So if those things that
Speaker 2: are popping up in your face, don't look at them,
Speaker 2: and then they won't pop up and be in the moment,
Speaker 2: Like it's you keep getting popped up, like these things
Speaker 2: popping up with other people's relationships and that sort of thing.
Speaker 2: If it's not there, you'll be thinking of your relationship
Speaker 2: and what you can do together to be more exciting,
Speaker 2: or how to get deeper and go to another level.
Speaker 2: Like stay in your lane, don't be in everyone else's lane.
Speaker 2: That it's none of your business. Yeah, like that's their life.
Speaker 4: You do. You starts with you.
Speaker 3: I love the story.
Speaker 2: It's it's always you. Yes, So I hope that helps.
Speaker 2: But yeah, like even your age, that there's not a
Speaker 2: measure of what to do. I've done stuff so young,
Speaker 2: and people have done stuff later in life, but like
Speaker 2: they got to travel, they got to do with these
Speaker 2: things that I never got to do. Like if you compare,
Speaker 2: you'll always regret. But just know you're on the right
Speaker 2: path and you're doing the right thing and whatever comes
Speaker 2: your way, like listen to your intuition and you're doing great,
Speaker 2: Like you're exactly where you are and you're doing exactly
Speaker 2: what you need to do, and you're on the right path.
Speaker 4: And when you believe that, everything's a lot easier. Just
Speaker 4: I love so. Yeah, don't put yourself in other people's shoes.
Speaker 4: Stay in your.
Speaker 3: Shoes except when you want to talk to them.
Speaker 4: Then put yourself in this if you need it.
Speaker 3: Amazing. Well, thank you so much, Cooper.
Speaker 4: Thanks everyone.
Speaker 3: If you have any questions, especially questions specifically for Cooper,
Speaker 3: please be sure to either pop them in Facebook or
Speaker 3: email them to us.
Speaker 4: We love answering them for you. Yes, bye everyone, Thanks bye.
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