Speaker 1: Life on Cut acknowledges the traditional custodians of country whose
Speaker 1: lands were never seated. We pay our respects to their
Speaker 1: elders past and present, Always was, always will be Aboriginal Land.
Speaker 1: This episode was recorded on gadigal Land. Hi, guys, and
Speaker 1: welcome back to another episode of Life on Cut.
Speaker 2: I'm Laura, and I'm kay sure, and I'm still it.
Speaker 2: Sorry toler that you who were really looking forward to
Speaker 2: being finished with I'm a Celebrity, get me out of
Speaker 2: here and being back on the podcast, you're stuck with
Speaker 2: me for another week where.
Speaker 3: It's on Safari.
Speaker 4: She's having some time off, she's having some R and
Speaker 4: R after what seems like a truly hectic ordeal.
Speaker 2: I mean she was in the jungle for a month,
Speaker 2: and if you don't know how the show works, like
Speaker 2: towards the end, they fly a loved one over so
Speaker 2: that they can be there for the finale.
Speaker 3: But because it kind.
Speaker 2: Of all plays out so quickly off the back of
Speaker 2: the eliminations, her mum was flown over to South Africa.
Speaker 3: So they're spending the week going on game drives to.
Speaker 4: Get which you would be pretty pissed if you flew
Speaker 4: all the way over there, your kid got kicked out,
Speaker 4: and then you just had to fly straight home.
Speaker 3: Water waste. It's pretty long journey to South Africa hours.
Speaker 2: I think there are some flights that go like relatively direct,
Speaker 2: but the one I took went up to Abu Dhabi
Speaker 2: and then down to South Africa.
Speaker 3: It was a really long journey.
Speaker 4: What did you do when you were in Africa? Kisha,
Speaker 4: let's just play that audio again for anyone who missed it.
Speaker 3: It went fun jumping, Okay, it was great experience.
Speaker 4: Anyway, we've got one more week, so Britt is not
Speaker 4: going to come back until next weekend, which means she
Speaker 4: will be back on the podcast next week. Produce Keisha,
Speaker 4: I'd just like to take this opportunity to say you
Speaker 4: have done a fucking fantastic job.
Speaker 3: Thank you, well done. I've had so they probably don't.
Speaker 3: They probably like, wait, so one more episode.
Speaker 2: I actually had so much fun recording with you over
Speaker 2: the past month, so I'm glad I get to do
Speaker 2: it for another week. But something that you mentioned last week,
Speaker 2: I'm deeply invested in how Raspberry is going in your house.
Speaker 2: What I'm not deeply invested in is that we brought
Speaker 2: it up on the podcast last week, and I potentially
Speaker 2: made the mistake of saying, hey, guys, if you've got
Speaker 2: a cat and you don't think your cat's pee smells,
Speaker 2: you're wrong and you need your friends to tell you.
Speaker 2: Because we have been inundated with messages and one of
Speaker 2: them was pretty full on.
Speaker 4: There's been a couple of people who are deeply offended
Speaker 4: by that, Like Kisha did say that if you have
Speaker 4: a cat, then ninety nine point n percent of the
Speaker 4: time your house smells like cat piss, and if you
Speaker 4: think it doesn't, it's probably because it does. And some
Speaker 4: of you guys were really offended. And I understand that
Speaker 4: because I'm a cat person, so I know how that
Speaker 4: would have upset you. But also it probably does because
Speaker 4: my house stinks. It fucking stings every day. Man, you
Speaker 4: got to clean that kitty litter every day. I already
Speaker 4: got a white two asses a day. Now I've got
Speaker 4: to clean kitty.
Speaker 2: If you include your own, I forgot about line. Just
Speaker 2: snap it off, don't on the go. Actually I have hemorrhoids.
Speaker 2: Nothing snaps off these days. Is that too much?
Speaker 3: That's too much?
Speaker 2: Sorry, I would like to put it on the record,
Speaker 2: though I'm not not a cat person. Like I like cats,
Speaker 2: I have nothing against them. I'm more of a dog person.
Speaker 2: But you're not a kitty litter person.
Speaker 4: That's the thing, because the Life on Cut dms have
Speaker 4: truly migrated over the past week. A week ago, every
Speaker 4: single one of you would send us reels about plants,
Speaker 4: like the amount of times I have been sent propagation
Speaker 4: reels or that one old woman who's like outside holding
Speaker 4: a tree in a storm like that reel.
Speaker 2: I get sent it at least fifteen times a day. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but at least you're into the plant content. They send
Speaker 2: it to the Life one cut Instagram, which it's my.
Speaker 3: Job to check the messages off, and I'm like, haha.
Speaker 2: So funny.
Speaker 4: So now Keisha only gets recommendations for kitty litter. One
Speaker 4: person sent me a recommendation for a kitty litter that
Speaker 4: we should purchase, like a kitty litter tray.
Speaker 3: I shit you not.
Speaker 4: It was five hundred and eighty dollars and I was like, guys,
Speaker 4: I don't know who you think I am, but currently
Speaker 4: she's shitting in a cardboard box. A recyclable kitty litter
Speaker 4: tray that I just would into the recycling bin.
Speaker 3: Every three days. I'm not buying. I refuse.
Speaker 4: I refuse to spend five hundred dollars on a cat toilet.
Speaker 2: I'm trying to evaluate how much I detest the smell
Speaker 2: of cat piss, because if it works, it's a real gamble.
Speaker 2: It's a roll of the dice in an investment, you
Speaker 2: expect that if you're paying five hundred and eighty dollars
Speaker 2: for something to remove the smell of your cat piss,
Speaker 2: that it will. If it worked, you would do it
Speaker 2: cost of living bab Yeah, but I'd make sacrifices in
Speaker 2: other I think I think that would be my upper limit.
Speaker 2: But I think I would be like, this is an
Speaker 2: investment because it will bring me a lot more joy.
Speaker 3: I won't have to just see this.
Speaker 4: I'd just like to point out that the kitty litter
Speaker 4: tray cost twice the amount of the cat.
Speaker 3: The cat cost half.
Speaker 2: We've also seen quite a lot of content about how
Speaker 2: to train your cat to poo win the toilet, which
Speaker 2: I'm for and I am going to keep you guys
Speaker 2: abreast of this situation because when she at the moment,
Speaker 2: I don't think she could get onto the toilet without
Speaker 2: falling in.
Speaker 3: But as she gets a bit bigger.
Speaker 4: I am going to have one of those households where
Speaker 4: the cat just book just goes straight into the loo.
Speaker 4: And I know we talked about it on Thursday, but
Speaker 4: I'm this is happening. Follow along, Hey guys, lady in
Speaker 4: a cat and follow my adventures. He document this, Yeah,
Speaker 4: I will. I will be incremable. But also I think
Speaker 4: from like an update perspective. So Matt, he's not a
Speaker 4: cat person. He will outwardly and happily say he prefers dogs.
Speaker 4: He had no interest in getting a cat, but if
Speaker 4: I wanted one, it was fine. I was you know,
Speaker 4: he was like, you do what you want to do.
Speaker 4: But I'm not taking care of it. I'm not going
Speaker 4: to pat it. I'm not going to feed it. He's like,
Speaker 4: it will just live alongside me, but I'm not going
Speaker 4: to show it any interest.
Speaker 2: Ah.
Speaker 4: How the tables have turned Matt now is every night
Speaker 4: the cat sits on Matt's lap. We wake up in
Speaker 4: the morning and he's like, have you fed her yet?
Speaker 4: She seems like she needs more food. She's meowing. Like
Speaker 4: he's so invested in the cat. For everything to do
Speaker 4: with the cat now, even like I left the door
Speaker 4: slightly a jar because I went outside. I was putting
Speaker 4: the clothes on the line, so I was right in
Speaker 4: front of the door, and he was like, Laura, you
Speaker 4: need to close the door.
Speaker 3: The cat could get away. Like I thought you would
Speaker 3: have been thrilled.
Speaker 2: I'm not shocked by this evolution, but I am surprised
Speaker 2: by the time it's taken one week. I thought it
Speaker 2: would be a bit longer. I thought it would kind
Speaker 2: of be a gradual wearing down.
Speaker 3: Process, but it seems it would be happening. Is it
Speaker 3: because she's really she is very cute.
Speaker 4: It's happened faster than what he managed to take to
Speaker 4: our own children.
Speaker 3: They're easier than children. It's true.
Speaker 4: That's fine, yeah, but also it's kind of one of
Speaker 4: those things that's annoying because I have done everything. I'm
Speaker 4: like the enthusiastic cat person, but the cat chooses the
Speaker 4: one who's disinterested in him, Like that's the thing. The
Speaker 4: cat prefers Matt, who doesn't show as much interest as
Speaker 4: I do. But then I get rejected. Anyway, that's probably
Speaker 4: enough catchat No. I think that that's for all pets.
Speaker 2: I think when you play a little hard to get
Speaker 2: Delilah does this with me, and I know she's manipulating me.
Speaker 3: This is for anyone who doesn't know.
Speaker 2: Britz Dog Delilah I often look after and I love it.
Speaker 2: She prefers my boyfriend because he's a bit like indifferent
Speaker 2: to it, like he likes her, but he will also
Speaker 2: be like, get off the lounge and show a bit
Speaker 2: more authority.
Speaker 4: She's like, yeah, treat me mean. Baddy like it. I
Speaker 4: think that animals like it, especially cats.
Speaker 2: This is how they got the Egyptians, the ancient Egyptians,
Speaker 2: to worship them.
Speaker 4: They played hard to get That kind of works in
Speaker 4: relationships as well, doesn't it. Anyway, Kish, there was something
Speaker 4: I want to talk to you about, and it's something
Speaker 4: that you have taken a real interest too recently. It
Speaker 4: has been showing up in the Facebook group. It's something
Speaker 4: that you have started your own little book club around,
Speaker 4: and that is well, it's literature, but more so specifically
Speaker 4: as you like to call it, literature, romance and sexy novels,
Speaker 4: which I didn't realize that they'd made such a comeback,
Speaker 4: and that this is a thing that this is like
Speaker 4: a genre of books that people are deeply into. But
Speaker 4: there's a whole subcategory for it on TikTok at the
Speaker 4: moment as well.
Speaker 2: Yeah, just to be clear, this is not a new thing.
Speaker 2: It's just a new thing for me, and I am
Speaker 2: a beginner to this. There is such a fierce culture
Speaker 2: behind smut book talk, and I'll get into.
Speaker 3: That smutty talk that I feel a little bit like.
Speaker 2: Me talking about on a podcast is like the most
Speaker 2: beginner entry level, like not even toenail being dipped in.
Speaker 2: And there will be people who are experts in this
Speaker 2: field who are like, oh my god, so please don't
Speaker 2: message me telling me that everything that I'm saying is wrong.
Speaker 3: I'm mute to this and I'm just having a lot
Speaker 3: of fun in it.
Speaker 4: I'm sorry about how can you be wrong when it
Speaker 4: comes to reading smutty literature.
Speaker 3: I don't understand how there's a right or wrong.
Speaker 4: I didn't know that there's such a deep subcategory or
Speaker 4: subculture of smuttiness out there.
Speaker 2: Well, because even when I posted in the Facebook group
Speaker 2: about it being called literature, I was told that that's
Speaker 2: not the most appropriate term, but.
Speaker 3: I really like it.
Speaker 2: It's like an amalgamation of clit and literasy literature.
Speaker 3: What is the most appropriate term well, it seems to be.
Speaker 2: And I don't know whether this is because of algorithms
Speaker 2: like censoring certain words, but it seems to be as
Speaker 2: though smut and hashtag spicy.
Speaker 3: Book talk are the most used or smut books.
Speaker 4: Can I just say if people are getting offended by
Speaker 4: the word litera chart because they're saying it's not the
Speaker 4: most on trend, people need to stop being offended by
Speaker 4: things or go touch grass, Like, we get offended by
Speaker 4: a lot, and I'm okay with it, but I draw
Speaker 4: the line at smut talk.
Speaker 2: I think there might be a little bit of a
Speaker 2: like a Again, don't the best way to describe this.
Speaker 3: Essentially, authors who are prolific.
Speaker 2: In this space and are very very successful have been
Speaker 2: slightly diminished in the authoring world because of the type
Speaker 2: of content that.
Speaker 3: They write, and it because they're writing pornos.
Speaker 2: Well kind of, and people are like, it's a bit
Speaker 2: patronizing to not recognize their success as great as we
Speaker 2: should because they are just as you know. So I
Speaker 2: do understand that there could be something a little bit
Speaker 2: more deep behind it, But I.
Speaker 3: Really like the word and I think it's fun.
Speaker 4: Okay, So for someone who sits on the other end
Speaker 4: of the spectrum. Like, I love reading, and when I
Speaker 4: have time to do so, I always get reminded by
Speaker 4: how much I enjoy it. But I don't have the
Speaker 4: time at the moment, and I certainly haven't invested into
Speaker 4: anything that smutty. And what I mean by that is like,
Speaker 4: probably the smuttiest thing that I read at the time
Speaker 4: was Fifty Shades of Gray, like the series.
Speaker 3: Which I don't even think was that. I think it
Speaker 3: was pretty vanilla really well. I mean, I've never read it,
Speaker 3: and I've also never seen the movies. Very vanilla.
Speaker 2: I think that that was like the world's introduction to
Speaker 2: that type of content. I think it existed long before it,
Speaker 2: but it became very popular at the time, and now
Speaker 2: on tik talk, over.
Speaker 3: Four point eight billion.
Speaker 2: People use the hashtags either smart smart books or spicy
Speaker 2: book talks. So it's like this whole genre of erotic
Speaker 2: romance and it's specifically centered around female pleasure. So the
Speaker 2: reason I actually initially kind of decided that I wanted
Speaker 2: to dip my toe in smart books is because I
Speaker 2: saw this post in the Life on Cut discussion group,
Speaker 2: and it was from a woman who was saying she
Speaker 2: was a couple of months postpartum, she was basically saying
Speaker 2: that her libido had gone to shit, and she was like, guys,
Speaker 2: I need to help. How do I get my sex
Speaker 2: drive back? And quite a few of the comments from
Speaker 2: people were saying, you need to get into these types
Speaker 2: of books because they will absolutely turn you on, and it.
Speaker 3: Will your libido will be back, just believe me. And
Speaker 3: I was like, wow, that's kind of is this the
Speaker 3: secret sauce to the Tingles?
Speaker 2: Well, in my own life, like I have seen, I've
Speaker 2: felt a little bit of a decrease in my sex drive.
Speaker 3: Could be hormonal.
Speaker 2: Not sure what's going on there, but I was like, Okay,
Speaker 2: I would like to get into this, but I'm not
Speaker 2: much of a reader.
Speaker 3: I feel like, can we read for work like we
Speaker 3: often read? Totally we're not reading for pleasure quote unquote.
Speaker 2: But I do get a lot of pleasure out of
Speaker 2: the books of the authors that we have on the podcast,
Speaker 2: but I've not really It's not something that I do
Speaker 2: for myself, if that makes sense.
Speaker 3: And so I thought, Okay, I need to get into reading.
Speaker 3: I need to do this before bed blah blah blah.
Speaker 2: And I was talking about it with a group of
Speaker 2: my girlfriends at the beach and we decided, like I
Speaker 2: think like a lot of women do that.
Speaker 3: We were like, let's start a book club. So, way
Speaker 3: is your book club that you have?
Speaker 4: Is it only smutty books or is it anything books?
Speaker 4: Because do you read like female pleasure porn and then
Speaker 4: all talk about it in a group chat.
Speaker 3: No, but it's very new.
Speaker 2: So I am the connective tissue of this group because
Speaker 2: what ended up happening is that I had a couple
Speaker 2: of friends that wanted to catch up on a Sunday.
Speaker 3: This is a couple of weeks ago. This'd be like
Speaker 3: maybe six weeks ago, and I was like, let's go
Speaker 3: to the beach.
Speaker 2: And then I had more friends that wanted to catch
Speaker 2: up and I was like, oh, well just come along.
Speaker 2: You know, it's a it'll be a group hang and
Speaker 2: you can meet the other girls. And it was me
Speaker 2: who was like, oh, I need to get more into reading.
Speaker 2: And quite a few of those girls are already readers.
Speaker 2: So we decided to make a WhatsApp group and we
Speaker 2: called it book club. And because I was kind of
Speaker 2: the instigator of it, I was like, guys, I'll choose
Speaker 2: the first book, which is where I went wrong because.
Speaker 3: I'm not the reader.
Speaker 4: Well, producer Keisha brought the book that she recommended today
Speaker 4: and it is sitting there next to computer because you
Speaker 4: just hold it up for anyone who's watching on YouTube.
Speaker 2: Well, this was recommended in the Facebook group. It's called
Speaker 2: Pucking Around. It's by Emily Wrath and it's got two
Speaker 2: hockey sticks on the front. Great if you love a
Speaker 2: part pucking Around. It's about hockey, right, so ice hockey,
Speaker 2: which is hot. Anyway, I did not realize that this
Speaker 2: book was seven hundred pages.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's like Shanta ram Verse Pucking Around. They're kind
Speaker 4: of the same size. That's an ambitious read for a
Speaker 4: first one. But can you just like open up a page.
Speaker 4: I want to see I want to see the.
Speaker 3: Level of read it to me in a dirty voice
Speaker 3: I feel as as I read this too, I want
Speaker 3: to make eye contact. I don't know if that's going
Speaker 3: to stop touching yourself. Okay, here we go.
Speaker 2: I gladly fall to my elbows on the counter, a
Speaker 2: smile on my face as he buries his hand between
Speaker 2: my legs. His other hand massages my ass cheek, giving
Speaker 2: it a sharp slap that I feel straight through my clip.
Speaker 2: You're gonna take me deep, he orders, pressing in with
Speaker 2: his hips, his cock wet with my release. I hope
Speaker 2: you're not listening to this with children in the car.
Speaker 2: I'm so sorry.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we should do on a warning.
Speaker 2: My bad.
Speaker 4: Sorry, Well we did say we were going to read it,
Speaker 4: so if your kids are listening, that's your fault.
Speaker 2: As he slides it in between my legs, please a whimper.
Speaker 2: You want me to come inside you, don't you, he teases, softly,
Speaker 2: nipping the lobe.
Speaker 3: Of my ear. How frequently does this happen throughout the book?
Speaker 1: Like?
Speaker 4: Is it like every five pages? Is it like every
Speaker 4: is it every chapter?
Speaker 2: Well, I'm quite shamefully so little through it that you
Speaker 2: already reached this part?
Speaker 3: No I didn't. Actually, the funniest part is that to read.
Speaker 2: That, I just flicked to a random page and like
Speaker 2: that's the level of horny. But my friends who have
Speaker 2: gotten their way through the entire seven hundred pages, like
Speaker 2: these are some of the messages that have come in
Speaker 2: my WhatsApp group, I just screenshot them. Guys, this book
Speaker 2: is legit making the horny teenager same, Like it's such
Speaker 2: a light read, but there's so much sex.
Speaker 3: How did she randomly stumble into three guys this horny?
Speaker 2: So yes, my answer is it absolutely will get your
Speaker 2: juices flowing. I don't know whether you're going to think
Speaker 2: it's a it's like a literature masterpiece. It's definitely not poetry.
Speaker 3: But I quite like that. You know, I'm gonna compare
Speaker 3: it to something like Jane Austen. That's a heavy read.
Speaker 3: It's pretty hard.
Speaker 2: The language is very like delicate, and it's very flowery
Speaker 2: about this.
Speaker 4: But I think the thing that about this that is interesting.
Speaker 4: We talk so much about like how do you get
Speaker 4: desire back in your relationship? How do you get your
Speaker 4: libido back? This isn't completely no pressure way of going
Speaker 4: about it. And not only is it no pressure, but
Speaker 4: if you're in a relationship, your partner doesn't even need
Speaker 4: to know that that's the reason why you're reading it,
Speaker 4: Like they don't need to know what's in it. You
Speaker 4: could be sitting in bed reading a book and your
Speaker 4: partner would have no knowledge of what the contents is,
Speaker 4: so you could use it as like a bit of
Speaker 4: a self experiment and it would be very little pressure
Speaker 4: to do.
Speaker 3: So, Yeah, there's something that feels quite classy about it with.
Speaker 2: And it's funny you mentioned that the person next to
Speaker 2: you won't know that that's what you're doing. One of
Speaker 2: my girlfriends put a message in the group chat.
Speaker 3: Is what it said. She wrote, I'm currently on a plane.
Speaker 2: I pulled out the book and a lady walked past
Speaker 2: me to go to the bathroom, and in front of everyone,
Speaker 2: she went, you're bold that one's filthy.
Speaker 3: So this stranger will it takes one to know one?
Speaker 3: You clearly read it exactly exactly?
Speaker 4: Would you read this in public or would you only
Speaker 4: say this for nighttimes?
Speaker 2: I think I feel the pressure right now to read
Speaker 2: it in public because I'm so far behind for book club.
Speaker 3: That I'm feeling the pressure that I need to catch up.
Speaker 2: Like we're having book club tomorrow night and I've only
Speaker 2: gotten through not even a.
Speaker 3: Quarter of it.
Speaker 4: And do you read this and then want to have
Speaker 4: sex with your partner? It definitely increases the arousal.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but usually in my situation, I probably need to
Speaker 2: change the timing of my reading because he's asleep.
Speaker 3: Bud, You're like, hello, wait, wait, take it up early
Speaker 3: for work.
Speaker 4: Look, if you I mean, if you have any recommendations,
Speaker 4: if you've read a smutty book and you were like
Speaker 4: that one really got the Fanny Tingles going put it
Speaker 4: into the Facebook group because then we'll start a thread
Speaker 4: in there. I think for anybody who is wanting to
Speaker 4: get their libido back, who is wanting to take matters
Speaker 4: into their own hands and would try anything, but also
Speaker 4: doesn't want the pressure of having to try everything, this
Speaker 4: could be a really great place to start, So like, put.
Speaker 3: It in there.
Speaker 4: I know that it exists on TikTok and everything else,
Speaker 4: and you can find them yourselves. But if you've read
Speaker 4: it and you've done the research, share it. Don't gate
Speaker 4: keeper that stuff. Share it with the rest of us.
Speaker 4: What it was really lovely is it?
Speaker 2: When I asked for recommendations, there were so many, So
Speaker 2: I love that there.
Speaker 3: Are women who are like this one was great for me.
Speaker 2: There's also a lot of different types, Like there's fantasy
Speaker 2: based and I don't mean fantasy in how we would
Speaker 2: talk about sexual fantasy that also exists, like there's one
Speaker 2: for all different kings.
Speaker 3: You mean they're on the moon, and like living with fairy.
Speaker 2: There actually are ones that involve like a fantasy style
Speaker 2: that's not my personal type of content.
Speaker 3: I liked this one because it kind of.
Speaker 2: Centered around sport, and I was like, well, I'm into that,
Speaker 2: so I'll read the ice hockey based one.
Speaker 3: What about it? You wrote down here? Fairy porn? What's that?
Speaker 2: Yeah? That's something I thought it was new, but it
Speaker 2: turns out it's been around since, like the term has
Speaker 2: been around since like twenty twenty one. Apparently there's a
Speaker 2: type of erotic literature where it centers around.
Speaker 4: Fairy This is like cosplay. This is cosplay porn.
Speaker 2: I don't know what point it turns into bctlity, but
Speaker 2: fairyes aren't animals.
Speaker 3: They're humans with wings, not tiny humans.
Speaker 2: I don't know when it becomes more about like the
Speaker 2: other creatures in the woods, but that's up to you.
Speaker 2: There's also a really good This came recommended to me
Speaker 2: a lot, and I've started following her on Instagram and
Speaker 2: TikTok and name is Tierney Reads and she there's heaps
Speaker 2: of people who do this kind of thing on BookTok.
Speaker 3: So they review smart books and they will put up.
Speaker 2: Like the stars of what they think of the actual book,
Speaker 2: and then they'll also put up chili's to.
Speaker 3: Say how spicy was. So I'm just dipping my toe
Speaker 3: in the low chili ones.
Speaker 2: But I'm sure that you can find something that kind
Speaker 2: of goes with your own interests as well, because there's
Speaker 2: so so many of them. And look, I actually have
Speaker 2: found it a really fun way to kind of get
Speaker 2: my sex drive. I know that that sounds like it's
Speaker 2: something that I feel a little bit uncomfortable talking about,
Speaker 2: being like.
Speaker 3: Hey, guys, my sex show's been really lowly. Ever, everyone's
Speaker 3: sex drive goes up and down.
Speaker 4: Yeah, if you were like I only have a high
Speaker 4: sex drive, I'd be like, get out Kisha boring. And
Speaker 4: I think also when you're in long term relationships or
Speaker 4: you're living with your partner and you see them all
Speaker 4: the time and there's not the desire and the intensity anymore,
Speaker 4: Like that's just a I don't want to say it's
Speaker 4: normal and that it has to happen to everyone, but
Speaker 4: I think for a lot of us that's a normal
Speaker 4: ebb and flow of a relationship.
Speaker 2: And apparently it can be a really fun way for
Speaker 2: people to explore kink, so to kind of dip their
Speaker 2: toe in it without actually being the person who's dipping
Speaker 2: their toe in it, because you're kind of experiencing it
Speaker 2: secondhand through reading about it, and so a lot of
Speaker 2: people have found different things that they're into through reading
Speaker 2: the books.
Speaker 4: Most things that's center around pleasure are for pleasure for men.
Speaker 4: Right like porn, most porn is made for men. Even
Speaker 4: porn that's made for women still often has a palatability
Speaker 4: towards men, whereas these books are very much written for
Speaker 4: women's pleasure, and the way in which they're written, the
Speaker 4: people who are consuming this are women.
Speaker 2: Would you get into this type of real can need
Speaker 2: to pass it on after I'm done?
Speaker 3: Can you wipe it down first?
Speaker 4: Now, something that the entire world is talking about at
Speaker 4: the moment is Taylor Swift And part of me hates
Speaker 4: that we're talking about it, not because I don't adore her,
Speaker 4: but because I am sure that there's people out there
Speaker 4: who have had enough, because if you're not as Swiftie,
Speaker 4: you're probably sick of hearing about her, because every single
Speaker 4: person is talking about her at the moment. Every news outlet,
Speaker 4: every fucking podcast, every article or everything posted on Instagram, like,
Speaker 4: everybody is talking about her.
Speaker 2: I feel a little nervous talking about her because I
Speaker 2: really like Taylor, But you're like I'm going to get
Speaker 2: something wrong and they'll come for me. There are people
Speaker 2: who know much more, and I don't want to speak
Speaker 2: from a position of power, and we don't.
Speaker 4: We absolutely don't. We are not those people like you
Speaker 4: guys know. I am very much enjoy it. Had so
Speaker 4: much fun at the concert. She is incredible. Do I
Speaker 4: know the intricacies of her and her cat's names, No,
Speaker 4: I don't, but I still very much value it. And
Speaker 4: I also love the new album. Listen to it all
Speaker 4: the weekend. Okay, so for anyone who doesn't know, which
Speaker 4: I know, they don't exist, but the new album came
Speaker 4: out the Torture Poets Department. It's what she teased on
Speaker 4: her recent ERR's tour. And I think there's been so
Speaker 4: many people who have been waiting with beta breath for
Speaker 4: this to drop, which it did on Friday last.
Speaker 2: Week, and then she had a double surprise and she
Speaker 2: ended up dropping two albums.
Speaker 3: Why not when you're Taylor Swift day Like, why not?
Speaker 3: Wend does this woman's sleep?
Speaker 4: Like?
Speaker 2: Sorry, you've just been touring the world for however many years?
Speaker 2: How do you also have the time to record that
Speaker 2: much music? I don't think that sleep is one of
Speaker 2: her hobbies like it is for you, K. I don't
Speaker 2: think she has a sleep app. I reckon she's if
Speaker 2: she was going to actually document it to be fair,
Speaker 2: Actually take that back, Taylor Swift is good at everything
Speaker 2: she does.
Speaker 3: She's probably even good at sleep. Yeah, she'd have better
Speaker 3: sleep hygiene.
Speaker 2: And she's devastating to me because it's something I really
Speaker 2: care about. Look, I did also listen to I Haven't
Speaker 2: made my whole way through it. There are people who
Speaker 2: were so in Taylor Swift's world that they were like, Okay,
Speaker 2: I'm clearing my weekend plans and I want to sit
Speaker 2: down with headphones on.
Speaker 3: From wo to Go, people had listening parties.
Speaker 4: I was on Instagram on Friday night and people were
Speaker 4: doing live listen parties where they were streaming their reactions
Speaker 4: to listening to the music.
Speaker 3: So they were like that for their people were.
Speaker 4: Like crying and screen and the amount of energy that
Speaker 4: one must need to maintain to get through two albums
Speaker 4: with that sort of intensity. I didn't have that, but
Speaker 4: I appreciate that people out there are so invested in
Speaker 4: doing this it's almost unfathomable.
Speaker 3: Like the rip she has.
Speaker 4: Yeah, but for the length of time that she's had
Speaker 4: it and for how that kind of just maintains, Like
Speaker 4: the fact that we've just done this Taylor's with frenzy
Speaker 4: of the aerostour, and now she's managed to bring it
Speaker 4: back up again and go for a round two.
Speaker 3: It's really quite remarkable.
Speaker 2: What I find really remarkable is that she has such
Speaker 2: a unique way of making whatever she's experiencing in her
Speaker 2: music relatable for people.
Speaker 3: And I actually noticed that in this whole album.
Speaker 2: And I think most people were assuming that this was
Speaker 2: going to be a Joe Alwen breakup album. They were
Speaker 2: together for like six years or something, and there are
Speaker 2: absolutely there are songs about him on the album, but
Speaker 2: I think most people were expecting more, and they were
Speaker 2: expecting her to kind of go.
Speaker 4: A little maybe harder on he can take down, yeah,
Speaker 4: and I have to destroy him.
Speaker 2: Like I said, I have heard every song, but from
Speaker 2: what I've heard and what I've read, it seems as
Speaker 2: though either they had a relatively non nasty breakup or
Speaker 2: she's doing the classy route of like I'm not gonna
Speaker 2: shit on you too much in this album. Who she
Speaker 2: did shit on was Mattie Healy. I think for a
Speaker 2: lot of people who are, especially those who are dating.
Speaker 2: There are so many songs about breakups, and there are
Speaker 2: so many songs about breakups of these deep loves, these
Speaker 2: long term relationships, but I don't feel as though there's
Speaker 2: as much written about the two month relationships. And when
Speaker 2: you're dating, you're often going through that emotional rollercoaster so frequently,
Speaker 2: but you're not really given the validation perhaps of like
Speaker 2: it's reasonable that you feel this upset or it's reasonable
Speaker 2: that you have this much emotion about this situationship that
Speaker 2: totroken down.
Speaker 4: Well, if anything, most of the time you're invalidated. It's
Speaker 4: not even it's the opposite. It's like when and especially
Speaker 4: if you're the person who is in that dating cycle
Speaker 4: and you have friends who are in long term relationships.
Speaker 4: Often when someone goes through like another relationship failure or
Speaker 4: another one that doesn't quite work out, even though it's
Speaker 4: been very short lived and from the outset, they weren't
Speaker 4: that invested in it. The person who's upset isn't even
Speaker 4: necessarily that upset about that relationship. They're upset about the
Speaker 4: fact that they're once again it didn't happen for them,
Speaker 4: or once again they're back into this like having to
Speaker 4: date cycle.
Speaker 3: I guess totally. It's that yo yo of excitement dist excitement.
Speaker 2: And I really like that Taylor included so much of
Speaker 2: this album centered around those emotions, and for her it
Speaker 2: was with Maddie Healy and they they're roomed to have
Speaker 2: dated for like two months, you know, a month, two three?
Speaker 2: Who knows?
Speaker 3: For everyone whose.
Speaker 2: Experienced love, they're like, well, I can relate to at
Speaker 2: least some part of this I thought was very smart. Mmmm.
Speaker 4: Well, the thing that we wanted to talk about, I mean,
Speaker 4: there's been a few Easter eggs, and the stories that
Speaker 4: have received like the most media attention are like the
Speaker 4: spat between her and Kim Kardashian and that having in
Speaker 4: a little Easter egg, and then obviously the Matti Heey stuff.
Speaker 4: But one of the topics that came up off the
Speaker 4: weekend and the thing that we wanted to have a
Speaker 4: discussion about is one of the songs, which is called
Speaker 4: the Black Dog. Now, this song is about Joe Owen
Speaker 4: and it's about their relationship and more specifically around when
Speaker 4: they had gone through their breakup.
Speaker 3: And these are the lyrics.
Speaker 4: I am someone who until recent events, you shared your
Speaker 4: secrets with and your location. You forgot to turn it off,
Speaker 4: And so I watch as you walk into some bar
Speaker 4: called the Black Dog and pierce new holes in my heart.
Speaker 4: You forgot to turn it off, and it hits me.
Speaker 3: Which can we.
Speaker 4: Just take a moment and all like untangle ourselves from
Speaker 4: the tailor's swift frenzy and everything else, because I know
Speaker 4: she can do no wrong.
Speaker 3: But at the same time, she's singing a song.
Speaker 4: About how she still looks at her ex boyfriend's location
Speaker 4: services because he still has Find my Friends on. She
Speaker 4: is and I don't want to use a word that's
Speaker 4: loaded with a lot of negativity, but she's stalking his location.
Speaker 4: She knows where he is without him giving actual direct consent,
Speaker 4: because I would say that when you break up with someone,
Speaker 4: the consent that you have given for them to track
Speaker 4: your location is instantly removed. Yes, I do think it's
Speaker 4: slightly softer than that, though, because it's not like she
Speaker 4: broke into his phone and loaded it up there without
Speaker 4: him knowing about it.
Speaker 3: He's just forgotten to turn it off.
Speaker 2: As she said, she said, you forgot to turn it off,
Speaker 2: So I mean he forgot to.
Speaker 3: Turn it off.
Speaker 4: But like, and I don't want to point bubs because
Speaker 4: I think a lot of us have been in this situation.
Speaker 4: But just because someone forgets to turn off their location services,
Speaker 4: you've been through a breakup, you had access to their
Speaker 4: location up until that point. There has to be a
Speaker 4: point of self control where you go. I'm not supposed
Speaker 4: to see this anymore, So I'm gonna unfollow this person's
Speaker 4: notifications as to where they are.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but with correct me if I'm wrong.
Speaker 2: With find my I am assuming this is iPhone and
Speaker 2: like find my Friends or whatever it is in the app. Apparently,
Speaker 2: when you stop viewing someone's location or they stop sharing
Speaker 2: it with you, you get a notification. So it's kind
Speaker 2: of like unf friending someone on Facebook. If you be
Speaker 2: them getting a notification that you've done it, it's like
Speaker 2: a whole other step of For me, it would feel
Speaker 2: a bit like a dagger of like, wow, that's everything
Speaker 2: in my life is changing, and that's a perfect symbol
Speaker 2: of what is changing in my life.
Speaker 3: They you know, we used to share everything.
Speaker 2: We used to share a home, we used to share
Speaker 2: where we were so for safety, and now that too
Speaker 2: has ended. I feel as though it could be something
Speaker 2: that if you went through an amicable breakup. You might
Speaker 2: just delay doing that for a bit because you're like,
Speaker 2: I just don't want to rub the salt.
Speaker 3: In the wound. It's like the finality of it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I understand that, I think, and I like,
Speaker 4: don't get me wrong, this is not me getting on
Speaker 4: my high horse being.
Speaker 3: Like this is so problematic. It's creating a culture, Like
Speaker 3: I don't think it is.
Speaker 4: I don't think that this is going to have like
Speaker 4: long term cultural impacts on people. But it does create
Speaker 4: a little bit of a gray area, I guess because
Speaker 4: so many of us behave in ways that are not
Speaker 4: Like if you said to me when you've been through
Speaker 4: a breakup that you were still tracking your ex boyfriend's location,
Speaker 4: I would, as a friend say to you, Keisha, you're
Speaker 4: being crazy and you need to stop that because that
Speaker 4: is really unhealthy. And I don't care if you've been
Speaker 4: broken up for a week or you've been broken up
Speaker 4: for two months, you need to stop. And from your
Speaker 4: own level of self preservation and also from a place
Speaker 4: of his privacy, you need to be the bigger person
Speaker 4: and unfollow that, regardless of whether he gets notified or not.
Speaker 4: So I think it's a very interesting call as someone
Speaker 4: who is such a huge public figure as what she
Speaker 4: is to admit that this is something that she's still doing,
Speaker 4: because it is such undesirable behavior that we would call
Speaker 4: out of any of our friends if they were doing it.
Speaker 3: I completely agree.
Speaker 2: I remember times in my life, particularly when I dated
Speaker 2: toxic people, and I'm thinking of one in particular, and like,
Speaker 2: I am not proud to admit, but I used to
Speaker 2: look at his social media like a hawk, Like as
Speaker 2: soon as we broke up, I would be like, what
Speaker 2: are you doing?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: But I guess there's a difference in that because he
Speaker 2: has a choice as to what he posts. And I
Speaker 2: also think that he probably posted things to deliberately spite me,
Speaker 2: like you know, post the Instagram stories out at the
Speaker 2: bars and like the little insinuations that you're like, oh, okay,
Speaker 2: you're moving on totally.
Speaker 4: But I think that that's very, very different for two reasons.
Speaker 4: One because it's obviously curated, and two because the time
Speaker 4: you know you're not actually you don't need to post live.
Speaker 4: You don't need to post where you are, when you're
Speaker 4: there and what you're doing. People can choose to do that,
Speaker 4: and they can choose to post live or they can
Speaker 4: save those photos and post them the next day, whereas
Speaker 4: like when you've got someone's location services on, you know
Speaker 4: where they are, you know what they're doing. Maybe like
Speaker 4: we're unpacking this in too much of a granular level,
Speaker 4: But at the same time, there would be people who
Speaker 4: just genuinely forgot that someone's able to see their whereabouts,
Speaker 4: and I think that that creates a real problem. I
Speaker 4: do think that once you're not in a relationship anymore,
Speaker 4: their implied consent around knowing where that person is at
Speaker 4: all times is instantly taken away. So whether they remove
Speaker 4: it from your phone or they don't, you should be
Speaker 4: removing it from your phone.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, I completely agree with you.
Speaker 4: Imagine writing a fucking song about that's inside thoughts, they thoughts,
Speaker 4: that's stuff that should not be shared with three hundred
Speaker 4: million people.
Speaker 3: Put that in your diary.
Speaker 4: I know she, I know that her songs are her
Speaker 4: verbal diary, but she needs a real one as well.
Speaker 3: I see.
Speaker 2: I think that there is a certain amount of vulnerability
Speaker 2: to that that I go, oh, yeah, I can see
Speaker 2: why you felt like you wanted to just know what
Speaker 2: they were doing.
Speaker 3: And I'm talking about non.
Speaker 2: Problematic relationships Obviously there is a very dark side to
Speaker 2: location track total that we're I'm not referring to that
Speaker 2: right now, but how do you actually feel about location
Speaker 2: tracking in general? Because I do not have one person
Speaker 2: that knows where I am at all times, neither.
Speaker 3: I don't have it on my phone.
Speaker 4: It's an interesting one to me because I would say
Speaker 4: the only times were I've ever felt as though I
Speaker 4: wanted to have location tracking on a partner's phone was
Speaker 4: because I didn't trust them. So therefore my intentions behind
Speaker 4: having it wasn't pure. It was to keep tabs on
Speaker 4: them because the relationship was toxic. He often wasn't where
Speaker 4: he said he was going to be, and he lied
Speaker 4: a lot, So my version of real reality was always
Speaker 4: being challenged because my intuition and everything about myself was
Speaker 4: saying this is not true. He is lying, but he
Speaker 4: would be saying something to me point black, as though
Speaker 4: it was fact. And I think when you have that
Speaker 4: push and pull in yourself, you often try and reach
Speaker 4: for any sort of truth, and so location services can
Speaker 4: provide that. Whereas like in my relationship with Matt, now
Speaker 4: Matt would have no problem with doing it, but there's
Speaker 4: no part of me that feels as though I need
Speaker 4: to do it. I don't care to know where he is.
Speaker 4: I know some people do it as a safety thing.
Speaker 4: Maybe you're a shift worker, maybe you live or you
Speaker 4: have to move through areas that feel like deeply unsafe
Speaker 4: to you. Maybe you get public transport in the nighttime,
Speaker 4: whatever that is. I can understand the safety element for it,
Speaker 4: but I don't feel as though in our relationship that
Speaker 4: that safety element applies. I don't think we're ever in
Speaker 4: a situation where I would go, God, I need to
Speaker 4: know where matters right now to make sure that he's safe,
Speaker 4: or vice versa. So therefore I kind of question, well,
Speaker 4: what is the purpose of having it? But I do
Speaker 4: think it's really important for parents having it for their kids,
Speaker 4: and I think that there is some level it doesn't
Speaker 4: encroach in their privacy. It is genuinely something that some
Speaker 4: people are entitled to know, and I think with a
Speaker 4: parent dynamic that exists.
Speaker 2: Wow. As a teenager, I am really glad that this
Speaker 2: didn't exist totally. I did some naughty things and I
Speaker 2: was definitely places that I lied about to my mum.
Speaker 2: And if you're listen to this, sorry mom, but it's
Speaker 2: true and I worked out fine.
Speaker 3: They're like, Mum, you still don't know about it.
Speaker 4: No, I think from a kid perspective, and I know
Speaker 4: that this has kind of taken off tangent a little bit,
Speaker 4: but I will do this with our girls when they're older. Like,
Speaker 4: if you want a phone and I'm paying for your phone,
Speaker 4: then you can turn your location services on. And I
Speaker 4: don't think that that's it is a bit of an
Speaker 4: ultimatum when it comes to kind of like phone use.
Speaker 4: But at the same time, if you want the independence
Speaker 4: to be able to do those things, and you want
Speaker 4: me to pay for you for that independence, then you.
Speaker 3: Can turn your location services on.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I'm thinking about this in my own life, and I
Speaker 2: have a couple of friends who most of them are single,
Speaker 2: so they have it on with a couple of their
Speaker 2: close friends. And I think that that is mostly from
Speaker 2: a safety perspective, because they're going on dates with new
Speaker 2: people quite frequently.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I.
Speaker 2: Don't know why, because I can see the logical nature
Speaker 2: of this, and I so trust my boyfriend that I
Speaker 2: don't know why.
Speaker 3: I still feel as though if I was asked.
Speaker 2: To share my location with someone, I just feel uncomfortable
Speaker 2: about it, and I have. I still cannot think of
Speaker 2: the logical reason as to why that's the case, because
Speaker 2: I don't do dodgy things. Yeah, I don't go places
Speaker 2: that I'm not supposed to be, But there's just a
Speaker 2: part of me that is like, maybe it could be
Speaker 2: used against you, even though like no one in my
Speaker 2: life has given me a reason to feel that way.
Speaker 2: You know, it's this is actually a reflection of me,
Speaker 2: not of them.
Speaker 4: No, but I think it's also a reflection of the
Speaker 4: world and being very aware that there are relationships that
Speaker 4: can turn toxic really quickly. I would say, if you're
Speaker 4: in a new relationship and the person that you're dating
Speaker 4: asks you to share your location services with them and
Speaker 4: vice versa, I wouldn't say, don't do it, but I
Speaker 4: would also say, like, look out for any other red flags,
Speaker 4: because I sometimes think that these things we can look
Speaker 4: at that as flattery. We can go, oh, they really
Speaker 4: want to know where I am, and they you know,
Speaker 4: they care so much about me, and they're so invested
Speaker 4: in this relationship, and it's like opening up a joint
Speaker 4: bank account together. That can feel like a real relationship milestone,
Speaker 4: which it can be, and it can be an incredibly healthy,
Speaker 4: beautiful relationship milestone. It also can be the indication of
Speaker 4: a relationship moving faster than what it should because the
Speaker 4: relationship in essence will turn toxic or that person wants
Speaker 4: to have a level of control over someone. But coming
Speaker 4: back to the conversation around like Taylor Swift singing literally
Speaker 4: singing a song about the fact that she still has
Speaker 4: access to where her ex boyfriend's location is, she probably
Speaker 4: doesn't now he's probably I'm really sure he's turned it
Speaker 4: off now, I guess part of me and I know
Speaker 4: it sits in the grave because normally I would be
Speaker 4: the first person to say this is deeply problematic and
Speaker 4: we shouldn't be platforming this. And I think I can
Speaker 4: acknowledge my bias because I like her so much and
Speaker 4: I know that she is a person, or shouldn't say
Speaker 4: I know, I don't know her at all, but I
Speaker 4: assume she as a person is not problematic. And therefore
Speaker 4: this is a reflection of being someone who's really heartbroken,
Speaker 4: not ready to sever every part of the breakup, and
Speaker 4: so they're still holding onto hope that maybe they'll get
Speaker 4: back together. And some of these actions feel really fine
Speaker 4: or you know, especially knowing that it sends a notification
Speaker 4: to that person, like it's.
Speaker 2: The digital I'm going to come over and collect my things, Yeah,
Speaker 2: so that I never have to see you again.
Speaker 3: It feels so final.
Speaker 4: But I think there is something quite kind in the
Speaker 4: vulnerability around it. And I say that because I think,
Speaker 4: as most women or most people going through breakups, we
Speaker 4: don't all behave perfectly. We all do things that maybe
Speaker 4: er on a side where if we were to see
Speaker 4: our friends do it, we would go, hey, you might
Speaker 4: need to rethink that behavior.
Speaker 2: Also, when we like zoom out and you look at
Speaker 2: it from a historical point, like I look at some
Speaker 2: of the behavior I did in breakups two years ago,
Speaker 2: I mean, that's fucked.
Speaker 4: That's what I mean. And I'm not saying that you're
Speaker 4: a danger. I'm not saying that you're deeply problematic. But
Speaker 4: I am saying that wakeups cause us to do things
Speaker 4: that we are not proud of. And I do appreciate
Speaker 4: the visibility over her behavior because I think it makes
Speaker 4: people feel less stupid, I guess. But also I do
Speaker 4: think that maybe there is a bigger conversation around normalizing it,
Speaker 4: and does that then make people go, oh, it's Okay,
Speaker 4: Taylor Swift did it.
Speaker 3: I don't know. I don't know where the line is.
Speaker 2: Ah, if this song was a bit like I tracked
Speaker 2: you so that I could follow you and I can
Speaker 2: know exactly what you're up to.
Speaker 3: If there was.
Speaker 2: A conclusion to what she did with the information, then
Speaker 2: it's problematic.
Speaker 3: But really she just sat there and was sad. She
Speaker 3: just cried.
Speaker 2: She was just sad because it's like indicative of the
Speaker 2: fact that he was moving on. And I think that
Speaker 2: that is something that we've all personally felt, and like
Speaker 2: I look back on some of the things that I
Speaker 2: would witness of my ex's moving on, and it fucking
Speaker 2: breaks you. Like this would just feel as though this
Speaker 2: person is going out and doing things in their life,
Speaker 2: and maybe you're not. Maybe you're still at home devastated
Speaker 2: by something. You're really shattered, and you can feel as
Speaker 2: though you're the one who's like left behind in the
Speaker 2: moving on process.
Speaker 4: One thing that can be seen in isolation as very bad,
Speaker 4: which it is when you look at it within a
Speaker 4: greater context of the discussion, you're like, yeah, okay, look
Speaker 4: it's a shade of gray. Let's get into accidentally unfiltered.
Speaker 4: So these are your most embarrassing stories of the week.
Speaker 4: Thank you for sending through. And if you haven't sent
Speaker 4: us one, if you have an embarrassing story that you've
Speaker 4: been like, you know what, I really should tell the girls,
Speaker 4: but then you keep forgetting to tell us. Fucking send
Speaker 4: it in to Life on Cut podcast on Instagram, and
Speaker 4: I'm going to go first. I cut my fingernails and
Speaker 4: toenails the other day, and I put all the clippings
Speaker 4: into a plastic bag with the intention of throwing that
Speaker 4: plastic bag away.
Speaker 3: The problem me here is the word intention, out.
Speaker 4: Of the intention of getting rid of them. Fast forward
Speaker 4: to the weekend and I went to the shops to
Speaker 4: exchange a shirt I got as a gift that was
Speaker 4: a size too small. I gave the bag to the
Speaker 4: lady at the desk with the shirt inside. She turned
Speaker 4: the bag upside down and tipped it out, and out
Speaker 4: fell the shirt along with all of my fingernail and
Speaker 4: toenail clippings. I totally didn't register that the bag I
Speaker 4: used to take my shirt back was also the same
Speaker 4: when I had used a few days earlier to collect
Speaker 4: all of my clippings.
Speaker 3: I am mortified. What would you do?
Speaker 4: Also if you were that woman, if you were that
Speaker 4: woman who had had the shirt return, you would be like,
Speaker 4: this is you.
Speaker 2: There is something so particularly gross about nables and I
Speaker 2: don't know why.
Speaker 4: It's just keraten. It's fine when it's on your body,
Speaker 4: but weird when it's on the floor. It's fine when
Speaker 4: it's yours, all of them, it's not fine when it's
Speaker 4: a strangers.
Speaker 2: Like you know, if you were at the gym and
Speaker 2: you're on the map, you know, the like flooring at
Speaker 2: the gym, and everything's fine, and you're doing a burpie
Speaker 2: and you're real brow of yourself, and then you like
Speaker 2: look to the side and there's someone else's nail there.
Speaker 3: It makes you do a different kind of burpy. It's
Speaker 3: enough for me to leave. There's just something so great.
Speaker 2: I feel so sorry for this woman who had to
Speaker 2: like and also there were multiple it's not like just
Speaker 2: why she's done her full fingernails and for the twenty
Speaker 2: there's twenty of them.
Speaker 3: I'd not be like funding you.
Speaker 4: I don't think I could refund you. Do you have
Speaker 4: to pay a tax for that? I mean this as
Speaker 4: someone who works in retail. If I pulled out a
Speaker 4: wedding ring and it was covered in toenails. I'd say,
Speaker 4: this is used. You're not returning this in the order
Speaker 4: in which I gave it to you in No, I
Speaker 4: don't know.
Speaker 1: What do you do?
Speaker 3: Did you get a refund? I need to know. Did
Speaker 3: she just brush the toa clippings off the counter? What
Speaker 3: did she do?
Speaker 4: Did you all pretend like it didn't happen? Did you
Speaker 4: just like stand there and ignore the pace?
Speaker 2: She pretended like that didn't happen. She's a better woman
Speaker 2: than I am.
Speaker 4: I'm so sorry. My mom must have clipped her nails
Speaker 4: into a bag. This is humiliating. I hate my husband, disgusting.
Speaker 4: My husband's a pig, what an absolutely filthy pig. I'm
Speaker 4: gonna go home and get divorced right now.
Speaker 2: I have an accidentally unfiltered today that has actually come
Speaker 2: in from my friend. Sophie works at the radio here
Speaker 2: and she's a Kiwi. She said, when I was back
Speaker 2: in New Zealand, I went and had a normal doctor's appointment.
Speaker 2: It was like a general check up and you know,
Speaker 2: all the female stuff. As we finished, I was sitting
Speaker 2: across from her. You know when you like, you know,
Speaker 2: when you finish and you're still sitting on the bed
Speaker 2: and they're punching all the data into the computer.
Speaker 4: And you just don't put your pants on and go
Speaker 4: and sit on the seat. You don't just sit on
Speaker 4: the bed. I put my pants on and just sat
Speaker 4: back up on the bed table. Okay, No, Nah, it's
Speaker 4: too intimate. I need to go back and say I
Speaker 4: put my pants on, I go and sit on the
Speaker 4: seat where I came in and sat down.
Speaker 2: Okay. Well, so she's sitting on this bed as the
Speaker 2: doctor's in putting the information, and she saw this bottle
Speaker 2: of clear liquid beside the bed. So she's like, oh good,
Speaker 2: I'll give my hands a clean with the hand sanitizer,
Speaker 2: and she squirts it all over her hands, covers her
Speaker 2: hands and she's rubbing them together, and she's like, this
Speaker 2: is a weird consistency.
Speaker 4: Like because obviously hand sanitizer as soon as you start
Speaker 4: using it starts evaporating. Yeah, Like it starts drying out
Speaker 4: real quick, thin too, yeah, like alcoholy.
Speaker 3: So, in her.
Speaker 2: Confusion, the doctor turned around and looked at her and
Speaker 2: was like, ah, Sophie, that's loob.
Speaker 3: She said, Now my hair is sticky, completely covered in loop.
Speaker 3: As they sit there with my legs just hanging off
Speaker 3: of the vest.
Speaker 4: There's something really grounding about the fact that your feet
Speaker 4: don't touch the floor either, Thank her fucking child, A
Speaker 4: la la swinging them. It's fine, you're fine, You're okay.
Speaker 4: You can do weird things in front of doctors. They
Speaker 4: don't care. That is true, Like if you were ever
Speaker 4: gonna be in safe company to do weird stuff, it's
Speaker 4: in front of a doctor.
Speaker 3: She just how stupid.
Speaker 2: Also, because there's an element of leg you were instructed
Speaker 2: to do that, Yeah, you didn't.
Speaker 3: You kind of took the liberty of I'm just gonna
Speaker 3: help myself to this to the loop. You're like, I'll
Speaker 3: use that for later.
Speaker 4: Sorry, you walk out without you walk out with your
Speaker 4: literature book and you'll lived up hands and you're like, sorry,
Speaker 4: I'm ready actually use this. She's just like, I'm ready,
Speaker 4: I'll take this home right now.
Speaker 2: Well, I think that this would probably be her suck
Speaker 2: for the week. But do we want to get into
Speaker 2: second suite the highlight and low light of our weeks?
Speaker 3: What was your suck? What was my suck?
Speaker 4: I know I knew this has come and now I
Speaker 4: can't even remember. Oh, I had a mighty mighty fight
Speaker 4: with Matt. That can be my suck.
Speaker 3: I had a real doozy of a fight.
Speaker 4: You know when you have those fights where afterwards it
Speaker 4: takes you a couple of hours, but you're like, I
Speaker 4: hate my husband.
Speaker 3: That's the feeling in my body.
Speaker 4: I hope that this is relatable, because like, I get
Speaker 4: such fury after a bad fight, where like we don't
Speaker 4: see eye to eye.
Speaker 3: The fury in me is so unreasonable, And then I'm
Speaker 3: not true. I know it's no, it is true. I
Speaker 3: know it subsides.
Speaker 4: I know that this is why we always say the
Speaker 4: way you feel is not real, not instantly anyway, your
Speaker 4: reaction to something is not your real reaction.
Speaker 3: What's your fight style too? Ah?
Speaker 4: Well, actually I just went quiet this time. I just
Speaker 4: couldn't be bothered. I think we tried to work it out.
Speaker 4: We were not seeing eye to eye. We're not yellers,
Speaker 4: like we don't yell. We just kind of throw a
Speaker 4: few barbs. We were trying to talk through it, but
Speaker 4: neither of us were seeing each other's point of view.
Speaker 4: And it was actually quite late. Whereas I know, I
Speaker 4: said a few weeks ago that we never go to
Speaker 4: bed angry. But I was just like, we're not going
Speaker 4: to resolve this tonight, and I feel so angry. So
Speaker 4: I'm gonna lay here and stare at the sea, and
Speaker 4: every ten minutes I'm going to just say one thing
Speaker 4: to you.
Speaker 3: So you can't fucking sleep either. That was my fight.
Speaker 4: Style both, so so we would we would almost get
Speaker 4: back to sleep, and I'd be like, it's interesting that
Speaker 4: you think that, though, Matt, because.
Speaker 3: You know how you said this whenever it does it
Speaker 3: it's interesting. It's actually it's actually not interesting.
Speaker 4: So we could have just had a fight and made
Speaker 4: up and we would have both been to bed at
Speaker 4: a normal time. But because I, over the space of
Speaker 4: another hour, brought up six new points, but I made
Speaker 4: sure they left a good amount of space in between,
Speaker 4: just to be real fucking annoying, because I can't sleep
Speaker 4: if I'm angry.
Speaker 3: There's no way I'm I cannot sleep angry.
Speaker 4: And I always said this recently, but anyway, I had
Speaker 4: a lot of fury in my body, and I was like,
Speaker 4: I guess this is the time where we get divorced.
Speaker 4: And then the next day we talked about it. We're fine,
Speaker 4: we love each other more than ever. Sometimes you just
Speaker 4: need to get a bit of a sometimes you need
Speaker 4: to get it out, and then you have great makeup
Speaker 4: sex and everything's wonderful again. In both mine and Matt's defense,
Speaker 4: in terms of how we fight, we don't often say
Speaker 4: mean Like it's very rare for us to say mean thing.
Speaker 3: We're not mean to each other.
Speaker 4: So like, even though we're both really angry and I
Speaker 4: know he also is contemplating divorce, we would never ever, ever,
Speaker 4: ever say those awful things, you know, because we know
Speaker 4: we love each other so much and we know it's
Speaker 4: not real. You just like you have these visceral reactions
Speaker 4: where you're so mad and then you're like, I just
Speaker 4: need to calm down because I actually love this person
Speaker 4: more than anything, So this is not real right now.
Speaker 3: They have just very much pissed me off.
Speaker 2: I respect that because there's a lot of control in that,
Speaker 2: because sometimes it's easiest to shoot from the hip.
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, we don't.
Speaker 4: We really really don't, which is good. So anyway, so
Speaker 4: how long did it take you to recover? Oh, the
Speaker 4: next afternoon because he left really early in the morning,
Speaker 4: so he was out of the house at like five thirty,
Speaker 4: so we didn't He came and gave me a hug
Speaker 4: and a kiss goodbye, and it was like, nice, he
Speaker 4: woke me up. Ah got one back there, didn't he.
Speaker 4: He gave me a hug and kiss goodbye in the
Speaker 4: morning and he went to the airport. But then we
Speaker 4: didn't speak all day. So then when I came home
Speaker 4: that afternoon, we spoke about it straight away and we
Speaker 4: made up straight away.
Speaker 3: Stupid. Well, I think this is like, this is real,
Speaker 3: This is what actual relationships are like. Anyway, we had
Speaker 3: a not always ruining bow when Sunshine.
Speaker 4: We had it was about the thing that we often
Speaker 4: fight about now is about me working too much. So
Speaker 4: that was the it's the running commentary of the fight anyway,
Speaker 4: setters them at work. So that was a fight anyway,
Speaker 4: that was my start. It was shitty, but obviously, like sometimes,
Speaker 4: and I do mean this, having a fight to then
Speaker 4: make up, I think it's a really healthy step in
Speaker 4: the right direction. And like sometimes you get to then
Speaker 4: say all the things that you've been holding on too
Speaker 4: that you needed to say and get out and then
Speaker 4: you kind of feel like you're starting again from a
Speaker 4: from a you know, a clean slate, which fights can
Speaker 4: be really productive in getting to a place of great
Speaker 4: resolution and relationships. So that was probably being like, now
Speaker 4: that we're fucking awesome off the back of it feels
Speaker 4: like a sweet as well.
Speaker 3: So that's my suck at my.
Speaker 4: Sweet having a fight and then having the makeup. Yeah,
Speaker 4: that's my sweet. Is Matt and I are like really
Speaker 4: great now because we needed to We needed to have
Speaker 4: that fight.
Speaker 3: It would have been brewing for too long. Bide then,
Speaker 3: thank you, thank you so much.
Speaker 4: I'm sure he will listen to this and be like,
Speaker 4: why the fuck a you're telling people this shit.
Speaker 3: Well, listen to his podcast and get his take.
Speaker 4: His take is like I also wanted to divorce my wife.
Speaker 4: What is your suck?
Speaker 2: My suck is that I was really humbled by our
Speaker 2: own people through the week. So I posted something in
Speaker 2: the Facebook group, the lifel on Cut Discussion group, and
Speaker 2: I kind of regret it now because I think I'm
Speaker 2: uncultured swine. So I posted something about really not enjoying
Speaker 2: this show that's number one on Netflix at the moment.
Speaker 3: I disagree. I strongly disagree with your take on this
Speaker 3: as well. Cash.
Speaker 2: Okay, so it's called Baby Reindeer. If you haven't seen it,
Speaker 2: it's I think it's like eight or nine episodes something
Speaker 2: like that, and the episodes are pretty long, they're like
Speaker 2: over forty five minutes. And I got four episodes into
Speaker 2: this and I kind of just had this realization that
Speaker 2: I was like, I'm really not enjoying this. I'm really
Speaker 2: uncomfortable and feeling all of these feelings inside of me
Speaker 2: and they're not good ones, And so why am I
Speaker 2: still watching this? Like I'm really I'm not having a
Speaker 2: good time. I just want to get out.
Speaker 4: But sometimes you don't have to watch TV for a
Speaker 4: good time. Sometimes you watch it to feel even a
Speaker 4: negative emotion. At least it makes you feel something.
Speaker 3: So this is where I.
Speaker 2: Think the I actually have learnt from this experience, because
Speaker 2: I probably jumped the gun by saying how much I
Speaker 2: disliked this TV show. I did know what was based
Speaker 2: off of a true story, but I didn't know it
Speaker 2: was based off of the main actor's true story. So
Speaker 2: a lot of people were like, it was really confronting,
Speaker 2: and it was so brave of him to put this
Speaker 2: out into the world because it shows some really dark
Speaker 2: sides of trauma.
Speaker 4: Also shows some really dark sides of him as well,
Speaker 4: like things that he probably wouldn't feel. He feels ashamed
Speaker 4: of whether that's like, you know, whether he should or shouldn't,
Speaker 4: but I think that that it doesn't show him in
Speaker 4: the best light at times either.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I have respect for that, but I think
Speaker 2: I've realized that I'm just really adverse to this type
Speaker 2: of content. I guess, you know, for me, this might
Speaker 2: be a little bit, it might make me seem a
Speaker 2: bit like a child, but up until last November, I'm
Speaker 2: actually medicated for this now because I have really really
Speaker 2: graphic and very real nightmares and they're incredibly intrusive, and
Speaker 2: so I steered away from any type of content that's
Speaker 2: particularly distressing.
Speaker 3: I don't watch true crime.
Speaker 2: I especially don't watch anything like horror or scary or
Speaker 2: like anything that's particularly traumatic for me.
Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, that's probably not best.
Speaker 2: For me, because it might give my brain some ideas
Speaker 2: that I don't want it to have. And so I
Speaker 2: really feel a bit I really object to this type
Speaker 2: of content for myself.
Speaker 3: I understand that other people really like it, but some
Speaker 3: of the the.
Speaker 2: Comments in this thread were like, essentially, you might just
Speaker 2: be a bit too basic and maybe only Robin comments
Speaker 2: if you, and for that I think is fair it's fair,
Speaker 2: but it's a suck.
Speaker 3: I'm an unconcious one.
Speaker 4: Well, I agree, because I think it is brilliantly done.
Speaker 4: Like I don't think that anyone's watching it and they're
Speaker 4: enjoying their time watching it, But I think it's really
Speaker 4: it's really well documented, it's really well filmed, and it
Speaker 4: was going to be my recommendation for the week. So
Speaker 4: if you haven't seen Baby Reindeer, this is my recommendation,
Speaker 4: go and see it, unless you're someone who has intrusive thoughts,
Speaker 4: unless you just don't.
Speaker 2: Like dark shit for eight hours across your screen. Anyway,
Speaker 2: I'm really looking forward to bridgeton the new season.
Speaker 3: Come okay, this is just stuck. I'm sweet. This is
Speaker 3: not your recommendations for the week.
Speaker 2: Oh my sweet for the week is that over the weekend,
Speaker 2: my boyfriend and I celebrated our one year anniversary.
Speaker 3: So cute.
Speaker 4: I also feel like things went so quickly for you,
Speaker 4: Like one year you guys lived together, you finally said
Speaker 4: I love you, which took a while, but you got there.
Speaker 3: That wasn't quick. That one took nine months.
Speaker 2: Have you do you now say it on the reg Oh? Yeah,
Speaker 2: so now it's a normal thing. One hundred percent. Not
Speaker 2: a day goes by.
Speaker 3: Oh that's cute.
Speaker 2: If a day went by, I'd feel like that was strange.
Speaker 2: You like, turn your location services on? Where the fuck
Speaker 2: are you anyway?
Speaker 1: Guys?
Speaker 3: That is it from us.
Speaker 4: Also, if you haven't subscribed to the YouTube channel yet,
Speaker 4: all of these episodes are going up on YouTube now,
Speaker 4: so if you want to watch us in the flesh
Speaker 4: not just listen to us in your ears. We are
Speaker 4: so up to date now, so they're kind of the
Speaker 4: YouTube version of the podcast are dropping within like twenty
Speaker 4: four hours of the actual episode, so we are all
Speaker 4: up to date, and they are amazing. I so love
Speaker 4: I think it's a very different dimension watching it on
Speaker 4: YouTube verse, listening to it on Apple Podcasts.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I also was not the type of person who
Speaker 2: ever watched YouTube podcasts before had our channel, And so
Speaker 2: I've started watching a couple more now because I want
Speaker 2: to get ideas is how we can do it better
Speaker 2: and that kind of thing. And I've been watching Mark
Speaker 2: Manson's podcast on YouTube and I.
Speaker 3: Actually do really enjoy it.
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, I get why people are into this.
Speaker 2: It feels more personal, it feels like you're just hanging
Speaker 2: out with.
Speaker 3: People and you're in a room having a chap.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Well, anyways, we'll put all the links in the show notes.
Speaker 4: You can go and have a watch, have a listen. Also,
Speaker 4: if you enjoyed the episode, share.
Speaker 3: It with your friends and you know the drill.
Speaker 2: Tell your mum, tell you don't tell your dog, Tell
Speaker 2: your friends and share the love because we love love