WEBVTT - Should We Be Allowed To Sleep At Work? 💤

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<v Speaker 1>Flex and Frooms, Flex and Frooms. This is the Flex

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<v Speaker 1>and Frooms catch up podcast, Happy Monday, Little Ones, Such

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<v Speaker 1>pleasure to be back. I just want to apologize in

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<v Speaker 1>advance for last week's podcast where I was screaming into

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<v Speaker 1>the microphone. Apparently it's just a noise issue, but I

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<v Speaker 1>tried to listen back. As you know, I listened. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>a you're an avid fans. I'll get like when Spotify

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<v Speaker 1>Rapped comes out, and it'll be like.

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<v Speaker 2>You're top number one fan, top zero point zero one

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<v Speaker 2>percent of all listeners.

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<v Speaker 3>Let's get into the potty.

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<v Speaker 1>Let's do it. Keeter, Flex and Frooms, Flex and Frooms, FLEXI.

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<v Speaker 1>I want to tell you about a love situationship, a

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<v Speaker 1>bit of an issue that we need to decode. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>going to get straight into it. Thank you, everybody, please listen.

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<v Speaker 1>My work frequently holds industry events where I can have

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<v Speaker 1>a plus one. I brought my partner along and he

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<v Speaker 1>got along very well with my co workers, but started

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<v Speaker 1>revealing super personal things about my sex life, which human

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<v Speaker 1>I uninvited him to the next event and he got

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<v Speaker 1>really mad about it. Should I feel guilty about setting

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<v Speaker 1>boundaries with my partner and my work. May I just say,

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<v Speaker 1>wowses have you listening? Have you ever experienced this? I

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<v Speaker 1>personally haven't.

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<v Speaker 2>It's so tricky though, because I feel like the issue

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<v Speaker 2>with picking a plus one is that you assume they

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<v Speaker 2>understand the context of the event you're inviting them too.

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<v Speaker 2>One can say broadly, it's inappropriate to talk about your

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<v Speaker 2>sex life at work, but at our workplace we pushed

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<v Speaker 2>the boundaries more often than not. But I could imagine

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<v Speaker 2>if I invited a partner to an event that wasn't

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<v Speaker 2>recording live on air and they said something that was

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<v Speaker 2>considered socially inappropriate, I'd be like, yeah, don't do that.

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<v Speaker 1>Be throng hands.

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<v Speaker 2>You don't have permission, you're a work event, you're a

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<v Speaker 2>plus one. Before we even set a boundary, I would

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<v Speaker 2>like to present to you a phenomenon that I have

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<v Speaker 2>noticed within a lot of couples and even friendship relationships,

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<v Speaker 2>the underlying competition. Now, if you find yourself in a

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<v Speaker 2>position with someone who, like in this scenario, is refusing

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<v Speaker 2>to acknowledge the unspoken boundary, I swear they're in competition

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<v Speaker 2>with you, because only someone who's truly in competition with

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<v Speaker 2>you would seek to create a type of you know,

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<v Speaker 2>union where you're not equal, Like you're at a work event.

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<v Speaker 2>You should be presenting as a united front. Say nothing

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<v Speaker 2>if that means you can be a professional plus one.

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<v Speaker 2>But in this instance, there's competition somewhere, and I don't

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<v Speaker 2>know where, but I see it a lot, especially in

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<v Speaker 2>romantic couples. Yeah, I just I think it's messy. Do

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<v Speaker 2>you know what's also really insane?

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<v Speaker 3>Though?

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<v Speaker 2>Having to explain to someone common courtesy. There's no appropriate

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<v Speaker 2>way to have that conversation. Hey, insert person who's meant

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<v Speaker 2>to love me. When you came to my place of

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<v Speaker 2>work and you spoke about our sex life inappropriately to

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<v Speaker 2>my coworkers, that really hurt my feelings. Now you sound insane,

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<v Speaker 2>I guess because to have to explain it, They're like, wait, what, like,

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<v Speaker 2>what do you mean?

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<v Speaker 3>It was funny, it made sense in the context. Everybody laughed,

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<v Speaker 3>nobody cares.

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<v Speaker 1>Relax. Then you feel like a nitpicker, like a Marge Simpson.

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<v Speaker 3>I don't know what that means in this context.

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<v Speaker 1>I'll take your word for it, and not again a

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<v Speaker 1>Simpsons trauma. Look, I'll say I think some people say

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<v Speaker 1>crazy things when they feel socially anxious, not an excuse. However,

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<v Speaker 1>we've seen it time and time again. You're in a

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<v Speaker 1>group of new people, you've got nothing to say, You're

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<v Speaker 1>going to go for the lowest commons and nominated because

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<v Speaker 1>you know you'll get a rise out of people. Ipso facto,

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<v Speaker 1>I'll say, have the conversation. I think what you say

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<v Speaker 1>about common courtesy is important. But I do think people

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<v Speaker 1>were raised in different ways, and for some people being

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<v Speaker 1>crazy and a little bit open with their private life

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<v Speaker 1>was accepted, and other people have decorum.

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<v Speaker 2>What if they say common courtesy isn't that common? I

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<v Speaker 2>mean common sense, isn't that common? Precisely someone says.

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<v Speaker 1>That this is flex and frooms on kit.

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<v Speaker 2>There's a lot we can learn from other cultures. Personally,

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<v Speaker 2>bit tired of learning. I think we've taken a lot

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<v Speaker 2>of information over the course of our lives and we're

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<v Speaker 2>not even done living yet. I'm just concerned about how

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<v Speaker 2>much excess space I have left, especially because as we

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<v Speaker 2>know your subconscious mind, you know, in your brain it

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<v Speaker 2>stores everything you've ever seen, thought, felt, smell, experienced. At

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<v Speaker 2>some point, I'm like, let's just stop, let's pause for

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<v Speaker 2>a second. But how do we feel about sleeping at work,

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<v Speaker 2>yay or nay? Shall we introduce don't say too much.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh she's yawning. She is yawning through me is yawning.

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<v Speaker 2>Because in other cultures that aren't Australian, you can sleep

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<v Speaker 2>at work and it's not frowned upon. Bring that back.

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<v Speaker 2>It's the Japanese art of sleeping at work in a mory.

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<v Speaker 2>It's a very common practice. You might have you been

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<v Speaker 2>to japan paries, you've experienced so you might see the

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<v Speaker 2>salarymen sleeping on the floor, on the train stations, floor,

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<v Speaker 2>at cafes, at cafeterias, and if you've seen this firsthand,

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<v Speaker 2>you'd be very taken aback by it, because it's unusual

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<v Speaker 2>to see someone looking unconscious in real life and everybody

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<v Speaker 2>just walking past like nothing is going wrong. But after

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<v Speaker 2>some research, it's actually not considered to be odd because

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<v Speaker 2>culturally this idea of rest is interwoven in Japanese culture.

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<v Speaker 2>Not rest precisely, but it's almost like a celebration of

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<v Speaker 2>how far you've been able to extend yourself to work,

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<v Speaker 2>that your work ethic is so pristine, it's so premium,

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<v Speaker 2>you're so committed to going the extra mile that you

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<v Speaker 2>would fall asleep randomly in the middle of the day.

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<v Speaker 3>Can I get a hoo rah hoorah?

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<v Speaker 1>The girl boss is a bit different in Japan. Literally, Look,

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<v Speaker 1>I will say that I've heard or seen those, like

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<v Speaker 1>galleries of men who get really drunk in Japan after

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<v Speaker 1>work and then they pass out. Have you seen those?

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 1>I wonder if we're getting the too confused. No, are

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<v Speaker 1>they just really good at sinking piss?

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<v Speaker 3>Perhaps? Who knows?

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<v Speaker 2>But I will say though, it is something to consider

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<v Speaker 2>because and I don't want to get into it, but

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<v Speaker 2>I will briefly.

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<v Speaker 3>The industrial revolutions.

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<v Speaker 1>Stay with me, martism one O one.

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<v Speaker 2>The eight hour work day is made for how men's

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<v Speaker 2>bodies function, is it? Okay, We've had a brief conversation

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<v Speaker 2>about this before. The hormonal cycle for men is twenty

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<v Speaker 2>four hours, right, so every day men reset, refresh whatever.

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<v Speaker 2>For women traditionally whatever, it's twenty eight days. You know,

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<v Speaker 2>your whole menstrual cycle. You've got your ovulating period, your

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<v Speaker 2>menstrual period, your police you know. You get what I'm saying, right,

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<v Speaker 2>So this idea that women are excitted to go to

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<v Speaker 2>work and be prepared to function at any given time

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<v Speaker 2>of the day during the month is actually insane because

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<v Speaker 2>for half of the month your body's going through something

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<v Speaker 2>makes that actually like quite impossible. But for men, it's

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<v Speaker 2>a fresh start every day, twenty four hour cycle, Like

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<v Speaker 2>you can get up every morning and do the same

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<v Speaker 2>thing you did yesterday and be at work for eight

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<v Speaker 2>hours because tomorrow you'll be refreshed.

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<v Speaker 1>We need to find a way to incorporate this into

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<v Speaker 1>the work workforce without giving the appearance of women a week.

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<v Speaker 1>There's a lot that needs to be done in order

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<v Speaker 1>for us to actually put this into practice.

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<v Speaker 3>I think very little. Let's just start tomorrow.

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<v Speaker 1>So I won't become an in next week out.

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<v Speaker 3>It's a bad week for me actually ovulating.

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<v Speaker 2>Actually it's a good week when I'm ovulating when I'm menstruating, though,

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<v Speaker 2>bad week.

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<v Speaker 1>Flop era, flop era, damn Kata, flex and frooms.

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<v Speaker 3>You're listening to flex and frooms.

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<v Speaker 1>What the frick?

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<v Speaker 2>We have yet another moral dilemma from my brain to you.

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<v Speaker 2>Imagine this. You have a friend, good friend, close, ish friend.

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<v Speaker 2>Now thankfully for you, this friend is a planner. If

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<v Speaker 2>there's a social event happening that that you know, rallies,

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<v Speaker 2>the girlies, this person is planning it. We're going for drinks.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm going to jeez, we're going to museum.

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<v Speaker 1>Let's shout out to that person. In my experience, they're

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<v Speaker 1>also the person that pays for the bill and then

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<v Speaker 1>you split.

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<v Speaker 2>Wrong wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong wrong, and correlations is not

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<v Speaker 2>equal what causation par So in this particular scenario, this

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<v Speaker 2>friend is the planner. Whatever it's going on between you

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<v Speaker 2>and the girl is. They're planning museum, dates, bars, drinks,

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<v Speaker 2>whatever they're planning. However, like clockwork, every time you get

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<v Speaker 2>to set event, they're always complaining about not having money

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<v Speaker 2>to participate. Oh, the museum's ticketed. Oh you know, I

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<v Speaker 2>don't really, Maybe we should just go somewhere else. Or

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<v Speaker 2>you get to dinner and they're like, you know, I

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<v Speaker 2>just have a drink, Like I don't really, and you're like,

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<v Speaker 2>wait the first time, odd, let me get it. I

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<v Speaker 2>got you. Every single time, you're constantly planning things and

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<v Speaker 2>then just not having money to participate in the things.

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<v Speaker 2>As the friend who's experiencing it, what do you do?

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<v Speaker 1>I think we just need to go back to the

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<v Speaker 1>drawing board. There's nothing worse. Well, no mil goods, I'll say,

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<v Speaker 1>I believe, especially when it comes to dinners, it's about

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<v Speaker 1>breaking bread together, Madeleine, ever seen it the TV show?

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<v Speaker 1>We love our bread, we love our we each love

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<v Speaker 1>each other. Did you like that show? I don't remember

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<v Speaker 1>your little hats on anyway. As Matilda says, the wisdom

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<v Speaker 1>of Matilda is Madeline. Oh, Madeleine, madln We love our bread,

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<v Speaker 1>and we love our butter, but most of all we

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<v Speaker 1>love each other. But we still do love our bread

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<v Speaker 1>and butter. And I think you need to find someone

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<v Speaker 1>where you can all eat together. Can I make a

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<v Speaker 1>suggestion McDonald's get those two for one deals. Get the app.

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<v Speaker 1>My mac is up. No free press now, I will

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<v Speaker 1>say it is annoying when you organize something and then

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<v Speaker 1>there's a complaint about money. I think if you're going

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<v Speaker 1>to be the planner and you're a bit skinned, then

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<v Speaker 1>you need to be planning things that are free. There's

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<v Speaker 1>plenty of free things to do around the city.

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<v Speaker 2>Circling back though, you made a comment that usually the

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<v Speaker 2>planner is the payer. Now, I'm not a planner, but

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<v Speaker 2>I'm a payer. I don't usually see the correlation between

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<v Speaker 2>the planner and the payer. I usually find the planner

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<v Speaker 2>planned and then offsets that responsibility. So what they're creating

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<v Speaker 2>is like a reciprocal environment. I've done the hard yards

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<v Speaker 2>now to confirm that you guys are down pay and

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<v Speaker 2>then someone like, oh I got it, put it on

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<v Speaker 2>my card. Put it on my card. It's an odd situation.

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<v Speaker 2>It happens way more than you think, and I don't

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<v Speaker 2>know what it is. I think perhaps that people don't

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<v Speaker 2>realize how much money does like ostracize you from participating

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<v Speaker 2>in stuff generally. And I think when you're like planning

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<v Speaker 2>a fun and hanging with the girl is like, I'm

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<v Speaker 2>a sick we'll figure it out. And then you get

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<v Speaker 2>to the movies and it's gonna cost you forty bucks

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<v Speaker 2>for a simple ticket and maybe a chocolate bar, and

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<v Speaker 2>then you're out. It's like you got to have Unfortunately

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<v Speaker 2>you got to pay to play.

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<v Speaker 1>No Nando's after the movie for you hunt.

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<v Speaker 2>There's none but what I will say, you're right, there

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<v Speaker 2>are heaps of free events, and what we need to

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<v Speaker 2>be bringing back is like some ingenuity around socializing. It

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<v Speaker 2>can't be costing me an arm and a leg every

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<v Speaker 2>time I want to hang out with a friend, dinner parties,

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<v Speaker 2>bring the food over. You're gonna cook a little something

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<v Speaker 2>something something, you know what. I love sitting in the

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<v Speaker 2>park in summer, little picnic, map picnic.

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<v Speaker 1>Go to Harris Farm, go to the like the free

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<v Speaker 1>not the freeb area, but like the super discounted area.

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<v Speaker 1>Get the camerabert whatever else is there. I will finally say.

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<v Speaker 3>Go to Harris Farm. When you're trying to be mindful

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<v Speaker 3>of you're spending, you lost it.

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<v Speaker 1>I will finally say, seeing as we're twenty four, we're

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<v Speaker 1>not really yet in the wedding territory. That's when things

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<v Speaker 1>are really going to fire up and hid in the hens.

0:11:41.200 --> 0:11:43.640
<v Speaker 1>You're hitting the engagement party, you hit in the barbecue

0:11:43.640 --> 0:11:47.439
<v Speaker 1>after the wedding, Like, I'm not excited for that. Go

0:11:47.559 --> 0:11:49.439
<v Speaker 1>to your luins, get your savings up. Girls.

0:11:49.480 --> 0:11:53.280
<v Speaker 2>Flex and firms, Flex and frames, cater never miss a beat.

0:11:53.559 --> 0:11:56.120
<v Speaker 1>I actually never learned how to read a clock. I

0:11:56.160 --> 0:11:58.360
<v Speaker 1>don't believe you, no, I swear on Earth. I have

0:11:58.480 --> 0:12:02.320
<v Speaker 1>a watch right now, stremely analog couldn't tell you what

0:12:02.360 --> 0:12:05.520
<v Speaker 1>time it is. HM. Takes me a little while. Alas

0:12:06.400 --> 0:12:09.000
<v Speaker 1>I knew deep in my baby brain that we would

0:12:09.000 --> 0:12:12.080
<v Speaker 1>get iPhones. I'm sitting on a swing and being like,

0:12:12.360 --> 0:12:15.400
<v Speaker 1>wouldn't it be amazing to have like a tablet in

0:12:15.440 --> 0:12:18.079
<v Speaker 1>your hand that had the Internet and texting on it.

0:12:18.360 --> 0:12:20.600
<v Speaker 3>You were sitting on a swing, I swear talking about

0:12:20.600 --> 0:12:21.040
<v Speaker 3>the Internet.

0:12:21.120 --> 0:12:23.560
<v Speaker 1>Do you go on a swing thinking one day?

0:12:23.880 --> 0:12:29.400
<v Speaker 2>Great Java, a device that you hold outside of the home.

0:12:30.000 --> 0:12:33.320
<v Speaker 1>No chords required. It's like see a few weeks ago. Well,

0:12:33.320 --> 0:12:35.360
<v Speaker 1>we've been speaking about it for a few weeks. The

0:12:35.480 --> 0:12:38.080
<v Speaker 1>term intrusive thoughts. I just want to clarify, no one's

0:12:38.160 --> 0:12:40.200
<v Speaker 1>no one's messaged me about this. I've just been listening

0:12:40.200 --> 0:12:42.120
<v Speaker 1>back to the episodes as I wont to do when

0:12:42.160 --> 0:12:43.680
<v Speaker 1>I can't sleep. Do you do that?

0:12:44.240 --> 0:12:46.080
<v Speaker 3>Listen back to us when I can't Yeah?

0:12:46.120 --> 0:12:50.160
<v Speaker 1>No, Oh, it's really good because my brain.

0:12:51.720 --> 0:12:52.439
<v Speaker 3>The recommendation.

0:12:53.480 --> 0:12:56.040
<v Speaker 1>I don't know this really good podcast because I listened

0:12:56.080 --> 0:12:57.720
<v Speaker 1>back to what we're talking about, and because I often

0:12:57.720 --> 0:13:00.480
<v Speaker 1>forget I listened to you talk and that I think, oh,

0:13:00.559 --> 0:13:03.000
<v Speaker 1>how would I respond? And it's always what I think

0:13:03.000 --> 0:13:07.280
<v Speaker 1>I'll respond, which is super interesting. That's cool, and I

0:13:07.320 --> 0:13:10.079
<v Speaker 1>think we're very soothing to listen to. I'd say little

0:13:10.120 --> 0:13:13.040
<v Speaker 1>haha before bed, I say this sort of say I've

0:13:13.040 --> 0:13:14.920
<v Speaker 1>been using the term intrusive thoughts, and I want to

0:13:15.000 --> 0:13:16.920
<v Speaker 1>change the script. I need to think of a new

0:13:16.960 --> 0:13:19.679
<v Speaker 1>thing that isn't intrusive thoughts, because in my mind, an

0:13:19.679 --> 0:13:23.120
<v Speaker 1>intrusive thought is aggressive and you don't want it, and

0:13:23.160 --> 0:13:24.800
<v Speaker 1>it's things that are painful, and a lot of the

0:13:26.200 --> 0:13:33.280
<v Speaker 1>bunny quotes, bunny quotations, quotation marks, speaking talking marks.

0:13:33.440 --> 0:13:34.679
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I always forget.

0:13:34.760 --> 0:13:36.120
<v Speaker 2>And you're the one who's meant to tell me what

0:13:36.120 --> 0:13:38.120
<v Speaker 2>they are, the bunny rabbits, you know the ones.

0:13:38.240 --> 0:13:41.320
<v Speaker 1>The bunny rabbits of me saying intrusive thoughts. This is

0:13:41.440 --> 0:13:44.720
<v Speaker 1>probably actually not the correct term. So the juries out

0:13:44.720 --> 0:13:45.600
<v Speaker 1>and what I'm going to call.

0:13:45.520 --> 0:13:48.319
<v Speaker 3>It, maybe it's like it's an unexpected.

0:13:47.600 --> 0:13:54.000
<v Speaker 1>Thought, a repetitive unexpected thought, a rat. Yeah, I'm having

0:13:54.040 --> 0:13:54.440
<v Speaker 1>a rat.

0:13:54.960 --> 0:13:56.520
<v Speaker 2>Remember I was telling you that I keep using the

0:13:56.520 --> 0:13:59.199
<v Speaker 2>phrase epiphany when I just meet FAI thought, I just

0:13:59.520 --> 0:13:59.960
<v Speaker 2>had a thought.

0:14:00.200 --> 0:14:02.160
<v Speaker 3>It wasn't that big a deal. I feel like my

0:14:02.400 --> 0:14:03.800
<v Speaker 3>repetitive thought.

0:14:04.480 --> 0:14:08.560
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, let's go on a benign repetitive thought, because

0:14:08.840 --> 0:14:10.720
<v Speaker 1>intrusive sounds rather sinister.

0:14:11.400 --> 0:14:12.280
<v Speaker 3>And also you're.

0:14:12.200 --> 0:14:20.920
<v Speaker 2>Right, like the visceral image that comes up is like aggressive, negative, dangerous, fearful, PTSD, nightmarish,

0:14:20.960 --> 0:14:24.920
<v Speaker 2>and sometimes it's just picturing you, your family, and another

0:14:24.920 --> 0:14:26.080
<v Speaker 2>family having a dance battle.

0:14:27.760 --> 0:14:29.440
<v Speaker 1>So this is another one. I was at an event

0:14:29.800 --> 0:14:32.480
<v Speaker 1>last weekend and I was talking to somebody and you

0:14:32.520 --> 0:14:34.440
<v Speaker 1>know when you're talking to somebody and they like act

0:14:34.520 --> 0:14:37.200
<v Speaker 1>something out, like, for example, they're like, I went to

0:14:37.200 --> 0:14:39.160
<v Speaker 1>get on the bus and I dropped my mighty and

0:14:39.160 --> 0:14:42.840
<v Speaker 1>they would be like, oh, they gesticulate. They gesticulate. Then

0:14:42.960 --> 0:14:45.600
<v Speaker 1>I'll get drawn out of the conversation and for the

0:14:45.640 --> 0:14:48.840
<v Speaker 1>next ten seconds, I just imagine them doing the movement

0:14:48.960 --> 0:14:49.840
<v Speaker 1>over and over again.

0:14:50.440 --> 0:14:51.200
<v Speaker 3>Do you ever do that?

0:14:51.600 --> 0:14:54.800
<v Speaker 2>No? But this is hearing you say these things reminds

0:14:54.840 --> 0:14:57.240
<v Speaker 2>me that I don't think I have a visual picture

0:14:57.400 --> 0:15:00.280
<v Speaker 2>in my mind as clear as you do, because I

0:15:00.280 --> 0:15:04.560
<v Speaker 2>I when I daydream and I imagine things, I speak

0:15:04.640 --> 0:15:07.480
<v Speaker 2>it like I'm recounting it in my head and then

0:15:07.520 --> 0:15:09.560
<v Speaker 2>we went here, and that would be really pretty. But

0:15:09.640 --> 0:15:12.800
<v Speaker 2>you're constantly seeing things sick.

0:15:12.840 --> 0:15:14.760
<v Speaker 3>I can see how that would be really distracting.

0:15:16.160 --> 0:15:19.960
<v Speaker 1>It's very disturbing. Actually, I'm just imagining that I'm doing

0:15:19.960 --> 0:15:20.760
<v Speaker 1>it again again.

0:15:20.600 --> 0:15:22.600
<v Speaker 3>Like a sim And then how do you stub back in?

0:15:23.360 --> 0:15:25.920
<v Speaker 1>I just like get back into it.

0:15:26.000 --> 0:15:27.680
<v Speaker 3>And you're a quirky girl. Anyway, Everyone's like you're a

0:15:27.720 --> 0:15:29.320
<v Speaker 3>little yeah away with.

0:15:29.320 --> 0:15:33.800
<v Speaker 1>The fairies today. FAM Mission twenty twenty three. Stop being

0:15:33.880 --> 0:15:38.440
<v Speaker 1>quirky and stop using the term course watch this space.

0:15:38.560 --> 0:15:44.920
<v Speaker 1>Ret repetitive, unexpected, unexpected run, unexpected rut. I'm having a

0:15:45.040 --> 0:15:46.720
<v Speaker 1>rut in my right era.

0:15:47.000 --> 0:15:47.880
<v Speaker 3>We can workshop that.

0:15:48.040 --> 0:15:51.560
<v Speaker 1>Okay. You've been listening to the Flex and Frooms Daily podcast.

0:15:51.880 --> 0:15:54.680
<v Speaker 1>For more, Tune Indicator on DAB or stream it on

0:15:54.760 --> 0:15:55.440
<v Speaker 1>iHeartRadio