Speaker 1: Something happened to me this morning. And I don't know
Speaker 1: if it's happened to you before, but you know, like lately,
Speaker 1: I've had a little bit of crooked guards. I don't
Speaker 1: know why this happens all the time. You shut it anyway,
Speaker 1: that's not what I'm I'm not telling that story.
Speaker 2: Continue have interrupted?
Speaker 1: So like, how many times have I shipped myself and
Speaker 1: told it on this podcast? Nearly every episode? No, I
Speaker 1: was just like just run of the mill morning bog.
Speaker 1: But because I've been unwell, there's been a lot of
Speaker 1: cleaning the back of the bowl with the brush.
Speaker 2: Yes, And this.
Speaker 1: Morning, this morning, I'm cleaning the back of the bowl
Speaker 1: with a brush and a bit of water flicked up.
Speaker 3: No, no, no, thankfully not in the eye.
Speaker 2: Welcome back to Two Dating Dads. I'm Maddie J and
Speaker 2: I'm This is a podcast that happens to be all
Speaker 2: about parenting for good, the.
Speaker 1: Bad, and the relatable.
Speaker 2: And as always, we do not offer any type of advice.
Speaker 1: Yes, we definitely don't. I don't know what else to
Speaker 1: add to that. That's pretty obvious.
Speaker 2: I do want to say there happens to be quite
Speaker 2: a lot of people who don't have kids, not even
Speaker 2: trying for kids, just taken advice who have started listening.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I've noticed that people have been like, I'm in
Speaker 1: my twenties and don't even have kids. It's like, why
Speaker 1: are you listening to me? Ramba?
Speaker 2: You know when you speak to someone who doesn't have
Speaker 2: kids in the same way that you would speak to
Speaker 2: someone who did have kids, and you talk about food
Speaker 2: and sleep routine, and I can just see within three
Speaker 2: seconds just the joy leave their face and they're like, no.
Speaker 1: One gives us. It's like showing friends kids pictures you
Speaker 1: no one gives. We spoke about this the other day
Speaker 1: with the wedding video. Remember we're talking about me you,
Speaker 1: Lauren April were talking about like showing people your wedding video.
Speaker 1: It's just like they glaze over the that they could
Speaker 1: not give two.
Speaker 2: You may as well be showing them a video of like, hey,
Speaker 2: look at this bit of paint drying on a wall.
Speaker 1: Do you like that?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: And is it a testament to ask that people without
Speaker 1: kids are listening? Absolutely it is. Yeah, it must just
Speaker 1: be well done, well done to both of us.
Speaker 2: I don't know if we've had this bit.
Speaker 1: I actually, legit have never had this particular better beer.
Speaker 2: No have we No, I don't think No, we should
Speaker 2: wish back on it now.
Speaker 1: Oh I just squirted everywhere, that's what she said.
Speaker 2: Yes, can you stop ejaculating things?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, it's a mid strength for those of you listening,
Speaker 1: better be MIDI so.
Speaker 2: Is that's three percent asked for those playing at home.
Speaker 1: I drove because last time I got public transport, I
Speaker 1: swore like a sailor on this podcast.
Speaker 2: And you got home at like three am. I do
Speaker 2: just want to say you're looking delicious and the better
Speaker 2: be a tiny monster shirt.
Speaker 1: And I'm so stoked when I got that.
Speaker 2: It's a good color.
Speaker 1: I like they really went for the monster theme on that.
Speaker 2: I really did.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we are on the mid strength for a reason
Speaker 1: because coming up.
Speaker 2: To Dridge your line, yeah.
Speaker 1: Look that's trademarks. I don't know if we can actually say.
Speaker 2: Yeah, can we say I'll say it, come and sue me,
Speaker 2: come get me?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I can come straight off.
Speaker 2: I'm not scared.
Speaker 1: Not me because I don't have the money.
Speaker 2: Are you going to do drive your line?
Speaker 1: I feel absolutely not. Look you want to think about it.
Speaker 1: I did January February dry.
Speaker 2: How did you feel?
Speaker 1: Oh, like an athlete.
Speaker 2: But it's just not the real ash, is it.
Speaker 1: It's not the real me? Like April prefers that. Look,
Speaker 1: I did feel really good, so it was a cleanse.
Speaker 1: Then I might do one later in the year.
Speaker 2: I'm going to do drive your life, so I'm going
Speaker 2: to support you. You can be on the sideline.
Speaker 1: I will drink your.
Speaker 2: Beers perfect if that's O perfect. So this is yeah,
Speaker 2: this is like a little warm up to what do
Speaker 2: we now?
Speaker 1: We're winding down the percentage of alcohol.
Speaker 2: We've got like like a week till July. I don't
Speaker 2: want to sound really cliche, but isn't the year going quick?
Speaker 2: Shut up? What am I saying? Sorry? Sorry? Cut that out.
Speaker 1: April I was like, oh my god, you know it's
Speaker 1: technically July. It's like, baby, it's June first. Just chill out.
Speaker 2: I'm with April on this April April. If you're listening,
Speaker 2: I can't believe it either. It's shocking. It is absolutely shocking.
Speaker 1: Such a boomer thing to talk about, like how quick
Speaker 1: gear is going.
Speaker 2: It's all I've got. It's all I've got that that
Speaker 2: and git it's cold at the moment.
Speaker 1: It's like such a go to small tour.
Speaker 2: It's mate daycare drop off. Literally every pair.
Speaker 1: I don't know what to say.
Speaker 2: You just say, oh it's nippy. Yeah, I could really
Speaker 2: feel it my fingers.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like I was in the surf just then
Speaker 1: and I was like one guy sitting next to me.
Speaker 1: I was like that wins cold. It was like, no, ship,
Speaker 1: it was bold. I was like, I actually back because
Speaker 1: it's like my head's probably going to be a little
Speaker 1: bit warmer than yours. So, but that's such a go
Speaker 1: to Yeah, go to chit chat. I don't really finish
Speaker 1: that one already. What that's like halfway?
Speaker 2: Oh my god, you are the fucking tinmy monster.
Speaker 1: Yeah, boy, not wrong, not wrong, Ash.
Speaker 2: I don't know if you saw my stories over the weekend.
Speaker 2: I was at a wedding which had a little disaster.
Speaker 1: Oh last weekend.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, a little while ago, a surprise wedding.
Speaker 1: Actually, I do recall the stories because I screenshot a
Speaker 1: lot of them and zoomed right in your face. Because
Speaker 1: that's the sort of friend I am where I send
Speaker 1: you your half blurred face going like you look like
Speaker 1: a fucking idiot. Yeah, I'm just like this guy's excited.
Speaker 2: Thanks, Ash, So we were at Shady Pines for what
Speaker 2: everyone thought was a birthday. It was a location where
Speaker 2: the two people getting married had the very first so
Speaker 2: we came back there like nine or ten years later
Speaker 2: for the birthday. We knew that it was going to
Speaker 2: be a wedding because Laura had done the rings, so
Speaker 2: we were up to speed.
Speaker 1: I did see that, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: And how it was going to play out. A friend
Speaker 2: of ours who's a celebrant, also does some MCing. She
Speaker 2: was on the mic, still very much playing the game
Speaker 2: of this is a birthday party, have an MC But
Speaker 2: I think every I think everyone never got it. Yeah,
Speaker 2: everyone knew. And the way it was going to play out.
Speaker 1: Love is disgusting, It's awful, awful.
Speaker 2: The way it was going to play out is that
Speaker 2: we had some birthday cakes, beautiful, big birthday cakes, like
Speaker 2: they would have cost a bit of money, Like, yeah, extravagance.
Speaker 1: The wedding cake. Look they're expensive, look delicious. Did they
Speaker 1: have the surprise wedding so that when they told vendors
Speaker 1: they're just having a birthday, it wasn't this.
Speaker 2: Expense cater was airding, Like motherfucker is they charge an
Speaker 2: extra forty percent stitch up so the mc slash celebrant
Speaker 2: was going to say, Hey, we're going to put some
Speaker 2: sparklers on the birthday cakes. We're going to sing happy
Speaker 2: Birthday out of the Happy Birthday surprise. It's actually a wedding.
Speaker 2: That was a game plan a little bit of context
Speaker 2: as well. There's a few people there who I didn't know.
Speaker 2: And Shady Pines is it's in the city. It's almost
Speaker 2: like a basement that you go into.
Speaker 1: It sounds, honestly, sounds very shady like. It's it sounds
Speaker 1: like a strip class.
Speaker 2: It's a great pub, great part.
Speaker 1: Oh, i'd say, ba, I know one thing. There were
Speaker 1: some barrel tables there.
Speaker 2: Yes, and there was like a moose head, there's a
Speaker 2: deer head, lots of taxidermy. But people would go outside
Speaker 2: because it was during the day so it was lovely
Speaker 2: weather outside. One person at the party was smoking a vape,
Speaker 2: well I thought it was a vape and he said,
Speaker 2: do you want some? And I don't, you know, I
Speaker 2: don't know. I don't smoke vabes. But also like in
Speaker 2: that situation where there was a couple of them and
Speaker 2: they said, have some of this, and I, what is it?
Speaker 1: Like? Just Dad's on the vapes just a I don't know.
Speaker 2: What it was to do, but I've I was lightheaded, like.
Speaker 1: It look if you haven't had a vape before and
Speaker 1: you suck it back.
Speaker 2: Like it wasn't it was something else.
Speaker 1: Nah, it's just like makes you dizzy, man.
Speaker 2: Dude, I was. I was not quite with it.
Speaker 1: So is that why your photos do you look like that?
Speaker 2: I was kind of in front of these people. I
Speaker 2: was like, well, that's good, vabe. I went back inside
Speaker 2: still like and back into the basement where it's all
Speaker 2: quite dark. My job was to light the sparklers as
Speaker 2: I'm still quite not with it, feeling a bit tingly.
Speaker 2: You know, it's dark down there people. And Laura, I'm
Speaker 2: gonna put Laura in the ship now because she said
Speaker 2: the best way to light these sparklers is to bunch
Speaker 2: them together really tightly.
Speaker 1: And you light them all of them.
Speaker 2: So Laura had I'm going to say, like twenty sparklers
Speaker 2: like held tightly.
Speaker 1: And I was trying to burn the place down.
Speaker 2: I mean, have you made a sparkle bomb before? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I am a male, I'm a male,
Speaker 1: was a child yeah yeah yeah.
Speaker 2: It's dangerous. Yeah, and you know if I hadn't had
Speaker 2: that vape, I would have been thinking more clearly and
Speaker 2: I would have said this is a bad idea, Yeah,
Speaker 2: but I go for it. I'm too high for this,
Speaker 2: bring him here. They were too light.
Speaker 1: The watermelon vape really got to me.
Speaker 2: And they even said someone made a joke saying about
Speaker 2: the fire alarm is going to go off.
Speaker 1: Dude, that ship shut up.
Speaker 2: That ship went off like it you know when they
Speaker 2: start to take and it goes it's a little spark yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's just smoke everywhere. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: it's like letting off a flare, dude.
Speaker 2: It was. It was crazy. It was absolutely crazy.
Speaker 1: Laura, not your best idea, mate.
Speaker 2: She was holding not just the hand of but she
Speaker 2: was holding part of the sparkle bit that lights up
Speaker 2: the whole. The whole sparkler went up in like two seconds,
Speaker 2: just gone. And then because all these sparklers go up,
Speaker 2: people and just throw it on the cake and it's
Speaker 2: this Morne cake. So then the cake's on fire and
Speaker 2: I'm there like in this haze.
Speaker 1: I did see a photo of you, like obviously taken
Speaker 1: aback from like what was happening, and you screen I've
Speaker 1: screenshot it and zoomed on your face because you were like.
Speaker 4: I was.
Speaker 2: I was in shock. It was up to me the
Speaker 2: guy who's just I don't know what I've smoked outside,
Speaker 2: and then it's just me and this cake that's on fire,
Speaker 2: and I know that it's the bride's favorite cake. So
Speaker 2: I was like trying to like put out the cake
Speaker 2: and then the dude. Then the smoke alarms went off
Speaker 2: and they're all links. All of a sudden, all the
Speaker 2: smoke alarms in the building.
Speaker 1: Have the sprinkler. Luckily, oh that would have been I
Speaker 1: love disaster.
Speaker 2: It's what you want. It makes it more memorable.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, we wouldn't be talking about if everything
Speaker 1: went to play am I have?
Speaker 2: But I did think I was wondering they're going to
Speaker 2: be you know, some of these alarm systems.
Speaker 1: Imagine if like firefighters came in but that wasp, Yeah,
Speaker 1: we here to put the fire.
Speaker 2: There was a moment where I looked at the celebrant
Speaker 2: and she was there going, oh, my fucking god, because
Speaker 2: there's smoke. Every Johnson ruined this fire alarm, and then
Speaker 2: the bride and groom as well, also looking at like
Speaker 2: this is a disaster. And then they had to kind
Speaker 2: of say, like surprise, it's a wedding beyond that moment,
Speaker 2: beautiful ceremony. Yeah, they regathered, regathered, came came home strong.
Speaker 2: Mum and dad were in tears of the writing groom.
Speaker 1: I had sure it wasn't tears because of the smoke.
Speaker 1: This is a beautiful wedding if we could see it.
Speaker 2: It worked out well because you know, I was very
Speaker 2: squinty at that stage, so I had something to blame her.
Speaker 2: It's not me, baby, this was and that watermelon vape
Speaker 2: that I did.
Speaker 1: Laura burn her her well, she burned her.
Speaker 2: Yeah, La Laura burn burned by name, burned by nature
Speaker 2: and by fingers. She she did. Yeah, I should have
Speaker 2: given her more sympathy. She did say it looked bad.
Speaker 2: It looked bad. The skin was very charred.
Speaker 1: And we'll get over it.
Speaker 2: And she was like, I may have to go to hospital,
Speaker 2: and I'm not going to hospital, and that.
Speaker 1: All Marley will take it to hospital. She's been before.
Speaker 2: She knows the drill.
Speaker 1: She knows. I got to see some of it just
Speaker 1: with the stories, but actually reminds me of my own
Speaker 1: Sparkler story I have it. It's not as juicy as that,
Speaker 1: But I'll just whip through it really quick.
Speaker 2: Can you just confirm at what age is this story?
Speaker 2: Is this a young ash?
Speaker 1: Is this a young ash? This is primary school Ash?
Speaker 2: Okay, you look like a kid who would have been
Speaker 2: into fire.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I like burning things down. Don't tell the police
Speaker 1: of that. I was just going to say spar was
Speaker 1: a dangerous man. We were. We had a party at
Speaker 1: birthday party at our house when we were kids. I
Speaker 1: can't remember whose birthday was, has just come to me now.
Speaker 1: And one of my cousins had a sparkler. We all
Speaker 1: had sparkles because we're kids. The fucking sparkles are great
Speaker 1: when you're kid. Yeah. Anyway, she's bloody flung it right,
Speaker 1: this thing flying through the air, landing on top of
Speaker 1: the back shed. The back shed's got all the pine
Speaker 1: needles on it.
Speaker 2: Yeah you're kidding.
Speaker 1: The fucking shed burnt down.
Speaker 2: No one got there in time quick enough to stop it.
Speaker 1: It wasn't so quick. It was just happened. The whole
Speaker 1: roof was covered in pine needles, and it was an
Speaker 1: old shed. It was gone, like it was literally gone.
Speaker 2: I can't believe sparklers are still in business. They're sold.
Speaker 2: You can get them from the shops.
Speaker 1: Go get my kids some sparkles after this.
Speaker 2: Ask here you go, mate, late birthday president, and I just.
Speaker 1: Get them from woollies. What we used to do? You remember,
Speaker 1: you used to like make the bombs out of it.
Speaker 2: You strip out the sparkle bit and then it was
Speaker 2: like breaking bad.
Speaker 1: You know, I know kids are such pirate technics.
Speaker 2: I used to used to litle bit of fire back
Speaker 2: in the day.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that was burning down, just beautiful. We shouldn't encourage it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's actually it's been a while since I put
Speaker 2: something on fire.
Speaker 1: Let's finish this up and go better. Yeah, Mace's got
Speaker 1: a new nickname in my house, Princess Lord of the Throne,
Speaker 1: I call her is What is she doing?
Speaker 2: So?
Speaker 1: She's too young to be doing the toilet training? She's
Speaker 1: like nineteen months old? Okay, I don't I think that's right.
Speaker 1: Abel will correct me neither way.
Speaker 2: So she's still in nappies all day?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I still doing a nappy thing. And Oscar's
Speaker 1: like potty training. We spoke about that because he shit
Speaker 1: himself last week. But Macy's just adopted this thing where
Speaker 1: she has to sit on the toilet now, at any moment,
Speaker 1: at any waking moment, it's so hard to get her
Speaker 1: off the toilet. She's just sit on there. She's just fully,
Speaker 1: which is gonna be great down the track when we
Speaker 1: do toilet train when she's in her teenage years.
Speaker 2: Do you think she's just watching what you do? Sit
Speaker 2: on the toilet for like a good hour.
Speaker 1: No. No, because it's a different toilet. She hasn't seen
Speaker 1: me in the other toilet. I'm in the en sweet toilet.
Speaker 1: This is the where Oscar sits to do a poo.
Speaker 1: So I think she's just mimicking an Oscar. Nice try though,
Speaker 1: I do like what you did there. Try to make
Speaker 1: me look like a bad dad.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Sorry, Well, joke's on you, little as I am.
Speaker 2: So she if she's happy though, fine, leave it there.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but it's like it's also dangerous mate. Yeah, she
Speaker 1: falls off, I'm going to the hospital. I don't want
Speaker 1: to have to deal with that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because she's quite I'm looking at a photo now.
Speaker 1: I'm happy. She's got food on her face, but happy very.
Speaker 2: Close to the corner of the sink.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, that's that's the same thing that I hit
Speaker 1: my head on before you tell that story, we sell over.
Speaker 2: That's looking sharp. Also, the bath, she could fall on
Speaker 2: the corner of the bath into the bar.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's not an ideal. Thank you for pointing out
Speaker 1: all of the safety hazards in which I've put my
Speaker 1: child in that situation.
Speaker 2: You're very welcome. But she looks.
Speaker 1: Happy, she's super happy. Food on the face. But anyway,
Speaker 1: so she's just addicted to a lord of the throne.
Speaker 1: As you can see, addicted and you'll see how cute
Speaker 1: she is anyway, So anyway.
Speaker 2: There are worse things to be addicted to.
Speaker 1: But the problem is you can't get her off. So
Speaker 1: what do you do. She won't let anyone else sit down,
Speaker 1: and you cannot get her off because she'll just scream.
Speaker 1: So she screams and screams, and you put it down
Speaker 1: somewhere else. In back, she's just on the toilet all
Speaker 1: the time.
Speaker 2: Isn't it weird what kids get fixated.
Speaker 1: I've got to bring her food, I've got to bring
Speaker 1: her toys, I've got to bring she's worked it out
Speaker 1: that she's like, if I just sit here, they will
Speaker 1: come to me. They will come to me with things.
Speaker 1: So she's now.
Speaker 2: Where she now has dinner. She could just sleep the throne,
Speaker 2: she could just sleep in the bar.
Speaker 1: Soon I'll be fanning her with a big fucking leave
Speaker 1: and I'll be feeding the grapes and she'll be this
Speaker 1: fattening on the toilet, being like ring.
Speaker 2: It's going to be awkward when I go to your
Speaker 2: place next time to record. Then I go to do
Speaker 2: a piss.
Speaker 1: And I pissed through a legs.
Speaker 2: I'm like, sorry, excuse me, So Lord.
Speaker 1: Of the Throne, She's like, she's just obsessed with it.
Speaker 1: I don't know if it's normal. I don't know if
Speaker 1: anyone else. Look, this is only my second kid, so
Speaker 1: I don't know the first one didn't do it. But
Speaker 1: I guess like she's probably thinking, like my brother does.
Speaker 1: Is all that other kid?
Speaker 2: Now? I want in on the action?
Speaker 1: Yeah, but she's sitting there fully closed, closed clothed. Get
Speaker 1: that out.
Speaker 2: If there's any parents out there who were experiencing something similar,
Speaker 2: how do I get them off? Any words of advice
Speaker 2: on how to this trend or do you just embrace it?
Speaker 1: Well, this morning, trying to get it in the car
Speaker 1: to go to Kindy, she was like, he's screaming head off,
Speaker 1: Like once back on the throne, and it's not like
Speaker 1: it's all the way upstairs. Like I can sit in
Speaker 1: the lounge room and just look through the door and
Speaker 1: there she is safe and sound near all these.
Speaker 2: If she's happy, mate leave her there.
Speaker 1: Like hopefully it transitions into that she just wants to
Speaker 1: easily potty training, because she'll just sit there all day
Speaker 1: and she'll just shit and piss all day while she's.
Speaker 2: There, taking happy off, PLoP it down. That's actually not
Speaker 2: about show see what happens.
Speaker 1: You know what will happen. She'll want to get off.
Speaker 2: I've got a buone to pick with you. Oh fuck, Actually,
Speaker 2: Ash far away, I'm angry at you because you've ruined
Speaker 2: kids birthdays for me because we had Marley's birthday on
Speaker 2: the weekend. Also, thanks for coming, Ash, very kind of
Speaker 2: you to drive all the way from and all the
Speaker 2: beaches out to eastern suburbs.
Speaker 1: Of Sorry, I had to wash my hair that day.
Speaker 2: I thought I thought we were friends, but.
Speaker 1: I honestly I had something. I had better things to do.
Speaker 2: That's fine, I completely understand, But when your kids have
Speaker 2: a birthday party, eventually.
Speaker 1: Never when it happens, you'll be at their eighteenth don't.
Speaker 2: Expect me to fucking rock up.
Speaker 1: It's a long way, man.
Speaker 2: So I was given the task of I do understand
Speaker 2: by the way, I'm only joking, just like a ship friend.
Speaker 2: That's fine. I was given the task of organizing Marley's
Speaker 2: birthday party, which I should be good at because I
Speaker 2: worked in events for fucking your own.
Speaker 1: Okay, no.
Speaker 2: Organized all these. I left it last minute. Yeah, didn't
Speaker 2: organize that.
Speaker 1: If it was your party, you'd be like you organized
Speaker 1: it last birthday. This one. You're just like our weak out.
Speaker 1: What do we want to do.
Speaker 2: I thought it's not summer, so I didn't think it'd
Speaker 2: be that busy. There's a lawn bowls place down the road.
Speaker 2: Guy was saying, it's like, mane, we don't take bookings
Speaker 2: for the outside tables, and I was like, I'll pay
Speaker 2: whatever you need.
Speaker 1: Just do not know who I am. I'm Maddie j
Speaker 1: I'm Australia's favorite bachelor.
Speaker 2: I was going to drop that in decided not to
Speaker 2: bullshit and he didn't want to bar of me. I
Speaker 2: was like, now, honestly, whatever, if there's a minute, whatever, whatever,
Speaker 2: I will make it worth your while. Fuck you, that's
Speaker 2: going to get me three tables.
Speaker 1: Nice, I'll do it.
Speaker 2: Didn't want me East Footy Club, great venue for the
Speaker 2: kids home games. Can't take bookings.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah.
Speaker 2: Out. So I'm calling calling everyone, trying to also work
Speaker 2: around the Fairy Princess that we've organized. And it's just awful,
Speaker 2: absolutely awful.
Speaker 1: And at the stripper.
Speaker 2: Fairy Princess Prince, welcome Crystal, the kids entertain it is Porsche.
Speaker 2: I was trying to make it worthwhile for you to
Speaker 2: come out this way. And at the same time I
Speaker 2: had to had to go get Marley's presence as well,
Speaker 2: and that was just a fucking ordeal because Laura had
Speaker 2: pre booked it on Camar Click and Collect. Waited in
Speaker 2: line at the service line as well on the phone
Speaker 2: trying to fucking find a venue. Got to the front
Speaker 2: and they said, oh, this is the wrong there's two
Speaker 2: k mats and bondais one in Westfield and one outside.
Speaker 1: And I was like, who in BONDI I see when
Speaker 1: you fucking came ups do you need over here?
Speaker 2: Came out. I don't want to tell you how to
Speaker 2: do your job, but you don't need two fucking km
Speaker 2: arts within like a one comet radius.
Speaker 1: Gank. God, we've got one that like service as the
Speaker 1: whole of North Sydney. I've actually got two now, but
Speaker 1: they were like doubling up ten or fifteen k's apart.
Speaker 2: So I went to the right km art and as
Speaker 2: I was standing there in the service line waiting to
Speaker 2: pick up the dollhouse, I saw something in the corner
Speaker 2: of my eye and I thought that would be such
Speaker 2: a great present for Mali because she's really into doing
Speaker 2: concerts at the moment. I did see once she stands
Speaker 2: there and sings a song.
Speaker 1: When's she got a talent agent already?
Speaker 2: Well, I'm working on it.
Speaker 1: You could just do it, man, I'm.
Speaker 2: Thinking about it. But I bought a gift that I
Speaker 2: thought was a great gift, but it was actually really shit.
Speaker 2: It was a terrible idea and I regret it and
Speaker 2: I can't get rid of it now because she loves it.
Speaker 1: Is it the Is it the microphone?
Speaker 2: Yes? Ye yes.
Speaker 1: Every household that I've gone to that have that, I
Speaker 1: just pick it up straight away and hid it. Oh,
Speaker 1: because it's so fucking annoying.
Speaker 2: And it's also the it's a little speaker which attaches
Speaker 2: to a microphone, and I don't know if there's like
Speaker 2: different modes on it, but it's an echo when you
Speaker 2: sing into it. Oh, it's like a karaoke machine. And
Speaker 2: Marley loves it. And as soon as I gave it
Speaker 2: to I turned it on and she was just she
Speaker 2: didn't sing, she just yelled in it.
Speaker 1: Ah, in this echo, just scaring the ship out of
Speaker 1: people with it. Yeah, such a shit toy, Like why
Speaker 1: do they create toys that honestly just invented to annoy
Speaker 1: the shit out of parents?
Speaker 2: And I think back to that moment where I was
Speaker 2: standing in line, and I was like, how did I
Speaker 2: not have some common sense? Like how did I not?
Speaker 1: You were in the moment.
Speaker 2: I was in the moment.
Speaker 1: You're in the moment. I do that too, where you're like, oh,
Speaker 1: do you know what my sister got my kid for
Speaker 1: his second birthday? All right, a kazoo.
Speaker 2: And it's loud.
Speaker 1: She gave it to us and I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: like why and she was like, you'll see a straight
Speaker 1: up fuck you And I was like what the fuck?
Speaker 1: I kept throwing it out, but somehow I kept reappearing.
Speaker 1: I don't know it, honestly, It's just tiny little kazoo
Speaker 1: and I put it in the bin. I swear to God,
Speaker 1: I put it in the bin more than once, and
Speaker 1: it just keeps reappearing in my kid's mouth. And because
Speaker 1: when you breathe through it, you breathe through it. But
Speaker 1: then he'll breathe, he'll inhale too. So it's.
Speaker 2: The people who have designed those types of toys. They
Speaker 2: know what they're doing. They've designed this knowing.
Speaker 1: Full well test the patience.
Speaker 2: Where it's going to end up in the hands of
Speaker 2: a little toddler, a little terrorist, destroying the lives of parents.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I blame my sister, not the kid.
Speaker 1: They don't know.
Speaker 2: So it's the week of organizing Marley's birthday, with the
Speaker 2: geek out, with the gears, with organizing the party itself.
Speaker 2: And I was thinking to myself the whole time. I
Speaker 2: was like, I don't have to do this. Ash doesn't
Speaker 2: do it.
Speaker 1: I don't do that.
Speaker 2: Ash doesn't do this. Why am I putting myself through this?
Speaker 2: And so now every birthday you fucking ruined it for
Speaker 2: me because I know you're I know you're sitting there
Speaker 2: on your couch at home, not even giving any thought
Speaker 2: whatsoever to the birthday party.
Speaker 1: I know. And also we went to a birthday party
Speaker 1: locally at the one we went into yours.
Speaker 2: Oh so you got someone else's birthday party? Okay, who
Speaker 2: the fuck? Was it?
Speaker 1: Just someone else? Someone less important than you as well?
Speaker 1: And again we just told Oscar it was his party.
Speaker 1: And all I did was tell one of my friends
Speaker 1: to walk up to Oscar and say, thanks for having
Speaker 1: me at your party.
Speaker 2: You are so manipulative.
Speaker 1: And we were getting in the car.
Speaker 2: What did he say when it's okay?
Speaker 1: We were getting in the car and there were some
Speaker 1: other people there and they're like, thanks for the party, Oscar,
Speaker 1: and he was like, that's okay, thumbs.
Speaker 2: Up his cotton socks. One benefit though, of organizing the
Speaker 2: party with this very princess that was coming.
Speaker 1: She did extra.
Speaker 2: Ash please your mind. And it's going to lead me
Speaker 2: into my new favorite segment on the podcast.
Speaker 4: And that is tell Me, Lies, Tell Me and that song.
Speaker 1: Oh my god.
Speaker 2: This has ended up so much better that little intro.
Speaker 1: I know, I just me singing anyway.
Speaker 2: Were you ever in the school choir?
Speaker 1: No? Very the weird al yank of each school choir,
Speaker 1: such a beautiful it's one of those voices, you know.
Speaker 2: When we recorded that and you said, oh, should we
Speaker 2: keep going. When we stopped it at that point, there
Speaker 2: was another like potential ten seconds that we could have
Speaker 2: could have used, and I thought, nah, we don't do
Speaker 2: and I regret not extending it. Ten seconds of you
Speaker 2: singing is not enough. So I started telling a lie
Speaker 2: to Marley.
Speaker 1: And it's very much other one.
Speaker 2: It's added to the list. The lies keep on coming.
Speaker 1: That's an endless list of parenting is just an endless
Speaker 1: list of lies.
Speaker 2: Now that I'm paying attention to you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: I'm just dishing out lines every day. I'm a psychopath,
Speaker 2: so good, But I'm going to say it's like kind
Speaker 2: of Santa Claus two point zero because Marley is a
Speaker 2: pretty bad eater. She's always been.
Speaker 1: Really, really tricky.
Speaker 2: Lola is a little like she's grizzleguts. She'll just eat
Speaker 2: everything she'll eat. Fucking watch off your wrist if you're
Speaker 2: not careful, she will. There have been so many times
Speaker 2: where I've come into the kitchen and she's like moved
Speaker 2: the chair to the pantry and she's eating like dried
Speaker 2: razoni and just like pesto. Anything she can get her
Speaker 2: hands on. She's just shoveling it into the list.
Speaker 1: None of my kids are fucked.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, Marley, you've got to like pin down. And
Speaker 2: I said to her leading up to the party, I
Speaker 2: was like, hey, the fairy princess so I found in
Speaker 2: the park. She said she can come on Saturday, except
Speaker 2: she only comes to the parties of those girls who
Speaker 2: are really well behaved. And she said, make sure Mally
Speaker 2: it's all her dinner, otherwise she won't come. And Marley
Speaker 2: was like, shit.
Speaker 1: They're so dumb. It's like, it's funny when you tell
Speaker 1: that lie to them. How straight faced you are too. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's like, honestly, just like you can lie to straight
Speaker 1: down the barrel.
Speaker 2: In my head, I was like, will she take the bait?
Speaker 2: Here is this? And like she took it, hook line
Speaker 2: and sinker.
Speaker 1: Beautiful.
Speaker 2: She was in And I even said to her just
Speaker 2: to like, you know, add a bit of spice. And
Speaker 2: I was like, and the fairy princesses, you need to
Speaker 2: clean the floor, clean the toilet. I said, they're always
Speaker 2: listening and they're always watching. And so Marley was like, oh,
Speaker 2: like thinking that this fairy is somewhere, She's like, I
Speaker 2: love my dinner. I loved it. I loved it. And
Speaker 2: every mouth was She was.
Speaker 1: Like, maybe she was having you on.
Speaker 2: Dad's fulling this fucking fully.
Speaker 1: Grown man think. How stupid does he think I am.
Speaker 1: I'm just going to play this up. Maybe get lolder
Speaker 1: to eat my food, not tell, and then I get
Speaker 1: my fucking fairy if she.
Speaker 2: Was playing me, and who knows who was playing?
Speaker 1: Who knows who's playing.
Speaker 2: But it worked. Even when it came to going to bed.
Speaker 2: She was like, do you know what, daddy, I love
Speaker 2: going to bed because sleeping is fun.
Speaker 1: She just got ya and I just got your Yeah,
Speaker 1: I've met Marley and she is much.
Speaker 2: She is fucking smart. The babysit a message and said, oh,
Speaker 2: by the way, I just want to say birthday for Marley.
Speaker 2: She mentioned it was on the nineteenth.
Speaker 1: Who is this? She's just telling randoms when her birthday is,
Speaker 1: what time she was born, her exact weight.
Speaker 2: She definitely doesn't get the brains from me from Laura. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: obviously she gets the looks from meet. She gets the
Speaker 2: great personality from this guy.
Speaker 1: Anyway, So let's move on from this.
Speaker 2: How many lies you told your kids?
Speaker 1: It's endless. It's like we were talking about last week
Speaker 1: the park like things are closed or things don't work.
Speaker 1: And you know a classic is the park is closed.
Speaker 1: That's a great one. And everyone who's listening except for
Speaker 1: those who don't.
Speaker 2: Have kids, Yeah, who maybe going you say what now.
Speaker 1: Unless you'd lie to your dog. And also, dog parents
Speaker 1: is not the same as real parents. Let me just
Speaker 1: put that in there.
Speaker 2: I for one just want to say to any dog
Speaker 2: parents listening, you're doing a great job. And I can
Speaker 2: only appreciate how if a dog dies the listeners do
Speaker 2: we need all the listeners.
Speaker 1: If a dog dies, you get over it in like
Speaker 1: a month and you buy a new dog. If your
Speaker 1: kid dies, it's something you take with you for the
Speaker 1: rest of your.
Speaker 2: Life, maybe if it's your little shits.
Speaker 1: But saying, but just saying, it's not comparable.
Speaker 2: I am going to disagree with you there and say that.
Speaker 1: Okay, So if Bustard dies, not that I wish that
Speaker 1: upon bust I never know, like you're telling me, not
Speaker 1: just going to go get a your dog at some
Speaker 1: point irreplaceable. Okay. But if if Marley dies, you'll carry
Speaker 1: that with you for the rest of your life. Correct,
Speaker 1: So it's not comparable.
Speaker 2: I mean, if you want to shoot on the listeners,
Speaker 2: as I will.
Speaker 1: Just do so, okay, do so willingly?
Speaker 2: Back to your lie?
Speaker 1: Yes, the life. Sorry, we went off there a little bit. Yes,
Speaker 1: so park's closed. It's a great one, but I pulled
Speaker 1: a completely different one. I've adapted. I would say, I
Speaker 1: impressed myself.
Speaker 2: You've upgraded the line.
Speaker 1: I've upgraded the lie to something else.
Speaker 2: Because sometimes sometimes you do get caught out.
Speaker 1: I get caught out because we were actually going to
Speaker 1: the park, right and I can't be like or get
Speaker 1: there and it's closed because it's clearly not.
Speaker 2: How did that happen?
Speaker 1: So we got there. Yeah, this particular park which is
Speaker 1: very popular, and it was so busy, and he's the.
Speaker 2: Weather's been good lately in Sydney. I was like, fuck
Speaker 2: that swings are taken up.
Speaker 1: And I was like, oh, sorry, buddy, it's booked out.
Speaker 1: He was like, I was like, what do you mean,
Speaker 1: what do you mean? What do you mean it's booked out?
Speaker 1: I was like, look, can't you see the people? They
Speaker 1: booked it out, But we can't go. We're not allowed.
Speaker 1: I'd love to, I'd love to go to this particular park.
Speaker 2: How long did it take to get to the park
Speaker 2: from your house?
Speaker 1: We walked and scootered there.
Speaker 2: Right, so he's had some exercise.
Speaker 1: We just scooted home.
Speaker 2: Did he take it well?
Speaker 1: You understood, Yeah, he understood that someone had booked it out.
Speaker 1: We went for a little swing at another tiny little
Speaker 1: ship park, but no one there.
Speaker 2: I think, actually what you're doing is a good thing
Speaker 2: because you're setting him up to experience disappointment from a
Speaker 2: really early age.
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, and it will come in waves throughout your life.
Speaker 2: So you're really, I think, laying down the foundations for
Speaker 2: what's going to be a great adult well done.
Speaker 1: Just just like a really gullible man.
Speaker 2: When it doesn't work out.
Speaker 1: It's just like, must be broken, it must be booked out.
Speaker 2: That's right.
Speaker 1: I think, like I said, it's the circle of life.
Speaker 1: Lying to your kids, not just in general. You tell them,
Speaker 1: they'll tell their kids.
Speaker 2: It is a beautiful thing.
Speaker 1: I've adapted. I've adapted the lie you've got.
Speaker 2: You've got to be fluid in your lie telling. All
Speaker 2: good liars know that it's important to be fluid here.
Speaker 1: I really encourage this.
Speaker 2: As they get older, they start to figure out what's
Speaker 2: truth and what's not. You need to keep fucking spinning
Speaker 2: those webs.
Speaker 1: Nothing is true this is a simulation.
Speaker 2: But for any parents out there, for any parents out
Speaker 2: there who are spinning webs themselves and maybe they've come
Speaker 2: across a really great lie that helps their kid behave
Speaker 2: better or it like minimizes a tantrum, we want to
Speaker 2: hear it. We will share them to all the parents
Speaker 2: and dog parents out there ash who need help.
Speaker 1: I don't want to know about your fucking dog lies
Speaker 1: because they don't get it. That's not comparable when.
Speaker 2: People who don't have kids, and I know this isn't fair,
Speaker 2: because you know, there's always going to be someone out
Speaker 2: there who's doing it more tough. But when people who
Speaker 2: don't have kids say I'm tired, shut.
Speaker 1: The that's I don't know what t it is.
Speaker 2: You have no idea. But before I started haacking more
Speaker 2: of our listeners, let's go into some questions.
Speaker 1: No, I've got another lie?
Speaker 2: Oh what do you got? Sorry?
Speaker 1: Oh? Sorry?
Speaker 2: Yes? Sorry?
Speaker 1: How dare you cut.
Speaker 2: Me off like I am so sorry? Apologies?
Speaker 1: That's apology. I just wanted something that just I saw
Speaker 1: that came up on TikTok. I was scrolling relentlessly because
Speaker 1: that's all I do now that I'm unemployed, and I'll
Speaker 1: play the snippet. Now, oh, my god, the fourth half
Speaker 1: of tooth Ever, you know what is no? Oh, that
Speaker 1: makes sense. So those of you who are familiar with
Speaker 1: who created that video. But the little girl in that videos,
Speaker 1: the neighbor is the name. But she dishes out a
Speaker 1: lie that has been told to her. So that's why
Speaker 1: this is a little bit unique. The kids actually believed
Speaker 1: it so wholeheartedly that she's telling others this particular lie.
Speaker 1: And the lie is that the tooth Fairy uses the
Speaker 1: teeth to build her house like bricks like bricks. So
Speaker 1: the dad or the mum has told this child. But
Speaker 1: does this mean they're not giving them any money? Is
Speaker 1: this charity work? That's what I want to know. I
Speaker 1: want to know if these parents have turned somewhat of
Speaker 1: an earning situation with this child into a charitable learning
Speaker 1: situation where it's like the tooth Fairy will die without
Speaker 1: your teeth.
Speaker 2: Do you want her to have a home or not?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Do you want the tooth fair to be homeless?
Speaker 1: There's already a cost of living and a housing crisis
Speaker 1: in this country. Now do you want to help the
Speaker 1: help the tooth.
Speaker 2: It does seem I don't want to swear, but fucked up?
Speaker 2: Do you think, like what kind of animal is living
Speaker 2: in a house made of teeth? Like surely, surely these
Speaker 2: kids at some point are they've got to start asking questions.
Speaker 2: But at the same time like genius nonetheless.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, so you got I love it because you've
Speaker 1: gotten out of having to spend any money. One and
Speaker 1: two your kid believed it and is willing to tell
Speaker 1: other people, like spreading the good words, spreading the good
Speaker 1: word and helping with this housing crisis that we're all in.
Speaker 1: I've got one more life.
Speaker 2: This lie is a good one because I've never used it,
Speaker 2: but it really annoys me when I get the girl's
Speaker 2: ice cream and they don't eat it quickly and it
Speaker 2: starts melting and just makes such a huge mess.
Speaker 5: That is that's no ice cream melts in my house.
Speaker 5: Not just the tinea monster, the ice cream talking like pray.
Speaker 5: This dad says that if you eat the ice cream
Speaker 5: when it's melted, that will make you.
Speaker 2: Sick, So you got to eat it quickly.
Speaker 1: Right, Okay, there you go. It's not a great one.
Speaker 1: It's kind of like it's giving get it done vibe
Speaker 1: where it's like they make way more of a mess
Speaker 1: if they're like what but like, is he also like
Speaker 1: me where He's like, if you don't need it quick enough,
Speaker 1: I'm going to have to swoop in and eat it instead.
Speaker 2: I'm like, I think it's a good lie. Marley and
Speaker 2: Lola love ice cream. They eat it so slowly. I
Speaker 2: mean maybe Oscar as a boy, he eat it quickly.
Speaker 1: He shoves it all in there.
Speaker 2: Man. See, girls don't do that. Girls take their time.
Speaker 2: And it's fine now because it's winter, but when it's summer,
Speaker 2: fucking nightmare.
Speaker 1: Yeah, especially if it's like on a cone and it's
Speaker 1: like dripping in the hands, that's fit fucked. But like,
Speaker 1: I'm just there, mate, waiting there, just waiting just then
Speaker 1: to not be eating it and.
Speaker 2: Be absolute vulture. Nothing is more aggressive than a dad bite.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I do it to April two. I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: give us a bite and I'll be like, go.
Speaker 2: To open your dissiccate your jaw.
Speaker 1: I'll go to do like the little nibble and I'll
Speaker 1: go and just take that. Hates it.
Speaker 2: Have I said for people to submit their lines?
Speaker 1: Have I already said that I submit more lines?
Speaker 2: Let's go on to some listener questions. Ash question number one.
Speaker 2: She says, here, my partner, whenever I ask me about
Speaker 2: having kids, his response is always soon. So she wants
Speaker 2: to know what does soon mean in male terms? Good question,
Speaker 2: Good question, I don't want to hope. If she's listening
Speaker 2: right now, please take a seat, because this news may
Speaker 2: shock you soon. That's that is he's deflecting.
Speaker 1: It's not good. Yeah, it's not good.
Speaker 2: Look we are firstly, we're sorry to break this news
Speaker 2: to you here.
Speaker 1: It's a classic man thing to just not commit to
Speaker 1: something right. Yes, So like using soon is like yeah soon,
Speaker 1: it's like when like April's like, can you loads of distrustion? Yes,
Speaker 1: I know that it's I'm not going to end up
Speaker 1: doing it. So hopefully that answers your question. I think
Speaker 1: it's a tough one.
Speaker 2: If you're wanting to avoid conflict, like I think most
Speaker 2: people are in a relationship, it's a lot easier to
Speaker 2: say soon. Then. Look, I don't want to have kids
Speaker 2: with you because I don't see this relationship going anywhere.
Speaker 1: You're a crack addict. I don't want to.
Speaker 2: I'm so sorry.
Speaker 1: No, he could be legit, I don't we don't know,
Speaker 1: We don't know. These people were just like, we just
Speaker 1: we take the question at first glance and it is
Speaker 1: what it is, but it's not looking good, so let's
Speaker 1: move on.
Speaker 2: I think, yeah, I want to I want to try
Speaker 2: and find some word of encouragement here. Okay, if I
Speaker 2: was her, if you're on on any type of contraception,
Speaker 2: stop taking it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, trick him into it.
Speaker 2: Trick him into it.
Speaker 1: Because what relationship has ever failed if you tricked your
Speaker 1: partner into having kidd save sex?
Speaker 2: And if you are going to have sex, get on
Speaker 2: top and lock in, locking with the legs and actually you.
Speaker 1: Can missionary lock into just heals cheez and jeez. All right, Matthew.
Speaker 1: Question number two for today's episode, boys, do your kids
Speaker 1: fake injuries to get out of KINDI.
Speaker 2: I think Marley is at this weird stage right now
Speaker 2: where the only time she's not at daycare as a Thursday,
Speaker 2: that's daddy day. And yet every morning she wakes up
Speaker 2: and she goes, is it daddy day today? Sorry? Kid,
Speaker 2: it's daycare day? And she flips out. She has this
Speaker 2: little meltdown every morning it happens, and I'm like, can
Speaker 2: you not just have some kind of awareness of the
Speaker 2: days of the week, you know, it's a Tuesday.
Speaker 1: You know what day, your fucking birthday. The least you
Speaker 1: could do is no Monday to Sunday.
Speaker 2: So she gets upset. There wasn't a time when Lola
Speaker 2: was unwell, and she kind of saw that Lola being
Speaker 2: sick having a tempt Marley didn't have to get a
Speaker 2: daycare and Marley was like, well, I'm not so yeah,
Speaker 2: Marley kind of knew that she could feel her forehead
Speaker 2: absolutely fine, not even like no snot whatsoever coming out
Speaker 2: the nose. I was like, you're fucking going, yeah, don't
Speaker 2: even try me power.
Speaker 1: Oscar do the same thing where he'll just be like, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm not feeling well. Oscar was off Monday because Sunday
Speaker 1: had this rank ofugh was really bad, like I was
Speaker 1: up with him in the middle of the night and
Speaker 1: stuff like that, and so was like, have the Monday off.
Speaker 1: And he'd got better really really quick. Must have been
Speaker 1: cold air or whatever it might have been. And then
Speaker 1: Tuesday comes around and he's like, oh, I'm still sick,
Speaker 1: shaking it. No, no, well I'm sick too. Sick of
Speaker 1: you off, Indy, you go, You've.
Speaker 2: Just gotta You've just got to send him off.
Speaker 1: They all do it. Man. Yeah, Oscar could have an
Speaker 1: ear infection and limp into Kindy.
Speaker 2: He's fine. I could be making this up. So if
Speaker 2: my mom is listening and this is untrue, I apologize
Speaker 2: in a.
Speaker 1: Your mom's listening, Hey, Mad's mom because I got creepy.
Speaker 2: You had a couple of beers and it's creepy my
Speaker 2: little brother. I'm pretty sure over the weekend, like this
Speaker 2: is years ago, this is like primary school. He fell
Speaker 2: off his bike and we're being really bloody naughty, you know,
Speaker 2: single mom, five kids. She's like, fuck, you guys are
Speaker 2: doing my head. And he was like, my arm is
Speaker 2: really sore, and my mom was like, you're fine. Next
Speaker 2: morning he's like, you're going to school. He broke his arm,
Speaker 2: but she's still him to school. He came home.
Speaker 1: See a very big difference between that generation and our generation,
Speaker 1: Like we could go on for days.
Speaker 2: You just gotta you gotta, you gotta send him and
Speaker 2: if they're unwell, you'll know about it.
Speaker 1: Also like now, and this wouldn't have happened with the
Speaker 1: generation before us, where Oscar might go to KINDI and
Speaker 1: be a bit upset about us. Yeah, most of the time,
Speaker 1: he fucking hates it for some reason, and April ring
Speaker 1: like an hour later.
Speaker 2: Just to make sure he's okay. Oh that's nice.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's nice. But my parents wouldn't have done.
Speaker 2: That, Like, fuck this kid at a sight out of mind?
Speaker 1: Yeah, fully, he's had tears rolling on his face and
Speaker 1: I'm like he else, I'm out of here.
Speaker 2: Man, because if Abel's doing that, it just invites the
Speaker 2: opportunity for them to say, actually.
Speaker 1: He's actually we're a bit short on teachers today.
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, fucking way.
Speaker 1: I would hate you. Yeah, tell you what you do.
Speaker 1: Chain him to a desk.
Speaker 2: And on that note, that is the episode.
Speaker 1: We've got time for today.
Speaker 2: Please chain him to a fucking desk.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, goodness, April, I didn't mean it.
Speaker 2: Before we go, do you want to say? Do you
Speaker 2: want to say thank you to everyone who's left a
Speaker 2: comment on Apple Podcasts?
Speaker 1: We can't leave. What do you mean we have a
Speaker 1: competition when you're turn out?
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I'm all over the shop today.
Speaker 1: No, that's okay, it's like when you were going.
Speaker 2: It's that vape. I'm still feeling the effects.
Speaker 1: The watermelon vibe you and every other primary school kids. Okay,
Speaker 1: we vape.
Speaker 2: We did we did a competition. It's a two hundred
Speaker 2: without you the merch from Better Beer.
Speaker 1: And thank you everyone for sharing.
Speaker 2: Sharing your stories of listening to the podcast. But the
Speaker 2: winner only one winner.
Speaker 1: The winner is drum roll.
Speaker 2: Kayo and shout out to his partner step who posted
Speaker 2: him listening to the pod whilst he was cutting the
Speaker 2: hedges at home. Eh, jeez, you are you are welcome?
Speaker 2: And now am I missing? I can? We can? I
Speaker 2: wrap it up.
Speaker 1: We'll get in touch. We'll get in touch with that
Speaker 1: winner and get that stuff at.
Speaker 2: We'll message them directly. Now I can say thanks to
Speaker 2: everyone who has given us a little comment on Apple podcast.
Speaker 1: We really appreciate it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, give us a follow. What else is there?
Speaker 1: La review? Follow the Instagram?
Speaker 2: Look and if there's a parent out there, a dog parent,
Speaker 2: a human parent who may be struggling, don't squint like
Speaker 2: that ash, send them the podcast and hopefully having a
Speaker 2: laugh they help the situation.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Look, no, let's let's leave it there and we'll see
Speaker 2: you guys next week two. Doting Dad's podcast. It acknowledges
Speaker 2: the traditional custodians of country throughout Australia and the connections
Speaker 2: to land sea and community.
Speaker 1: We pay our respects to their elders past and present,
Speaker 1: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestrate Islander
Speaker 1: peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land.