WEBVTT - Is The Side Hustle Still In? 💰💸 0:00:01.520 --> 0:00:04.440 Flex and Frooms, Flex and Frooms. This is the Flex 0:00:04.480 --> 0:00:05.960 and Frooms catch Up podcast. 0:00:08.760 --> 0:00:11.280 Welcome back to the potty Little Brookie, our producers here 0:00:11.320 --> 0:00:12.960 in the studio. She's wearing a white top. 0:00:13.080 --> 0:00:14.720 It always was if you're about to attack, when you 0:00:14.760 --> 0:00:18.439 do the clothing looking at in your eyes. When you 0:00:18.440 --> 0:00:20.479 start rattling off what we're wearing, I'm like, I don't, 0:00:20.680 --> 0:00:22.439 I'm not. I don't want any problem. 0:00:22.760 --> 0:00:25.079 Radio craft Flex. It's a radio show. You need to 0:00:25.079 --> 0:00:29.360 paint a picture, isn't that right, Brookie? That's it. Brookie 0:00:29.480 --> 0:00:32.159 is wearing I've been staring at it all day, a 0:00:32.200 --> 0:00:35.240 little headband. She looks like a princess. She's a princess. 0:00:35.320 --> 0:00:40.120 And it looks like crusty microplastics in a good way, 0:00:40.280 --> 0:00:41.480 in a good way, in a good way. 0:00:41.960 --> 0:00:44.440 Like it looks it looks like. 0:00:45.880 --> 0:00:48.400 Seeds that a bird would peck, but they're rainbow so crazy? 0:00:48.400 --> 0:00:50.600 Can I tell you about will you remind me of 0:00:50.680 --> 0:00:54.560 right now? Did you watch that show you People on Netflix? No? 0:00:54.680 --> 0:00:57.160 So it's about this show about interracial relationships. Right, you 0:00:57.240 --> 0:00:59.480 got this black girl, this white guy. Look looking at 0:00:59.480 --> 0:01:02.120 my own life right now? Right, and there's always that 0:01:02.240 --> 0:01:05.720 like white mom who thinks she's being flattering as she 0:01:05.920 --> 0:01:08.080 like tears you a new one. How are you gonna 0:01:08.080 --> 0:01:12.400 tell brook her head but looks like microplastics. You're actually insane. 0:01:12.800 --> 0:01:15.920 And then you've gotta keep pointing at her as you 0:01:15.959 --> 0:01:20.320 survey her with those beaty little eyes. She's like, yeah, 0:01:20.640 --> 0:01:25.920 it looks like gosh, you guys, what I meant creative things. 0:01:26.040 --> 0:01:27.440 We would have never done it in my days. We 0:01:27.440 --> 0:01:30.800 preferred more classic, more items than we did. But gosh, 0:01:30.920 --> 0:01:33.959 it just is so creative the way you young girls. 0:01:34.800 --> 0:01:38.160 That's what you're giving and you're literally three years away 0:01:38.200 --> 0:01:40.840 from that being your full identity. I promise you. It's 0:01:40.840 --> 0:01:41.600 the tread wife. 0:01:42.280 --> 0:01:47.640 Okay, well I am now FLEXI I mean Brookie, stop. 0:01:47.280 --> 0:01:51.640 It, leave her alone, Leave her alone. Yeah, stop looking 0:01:51.640 --> 0:01:54.760 at her. I'm about to go to war for brook 0:01:54.880 --> 0:01:56.840 You stop looking at her. It's like what I feel, 0:01:56.840 --> 0:01:58.600 I need to do poopy and the eyes go white. 0:01:58.720 --> 0:01:58.920 Yeah. 0:01:59.080 --> 0:02:01.720 Flex put on my story a few weeks ago, me 0:02:01.880 --> 0:02:06.720 saying need to go poopy as a joke, and then 0:02:06.800 --> 0:02:09.119 my friends message me straight away being like, oh my god, 0:02:09.200 --> 0:02:13.200 on Flexy's story, your eyes widened. It means you're being 0:02:13.240 --> 0:02:18.840 serious And what did I go do poopy. So I reminded. 0:02:18.880 --> 0:02:21.200 You know, Flex makes for contents. My best friends are 0:02:21.200 --> 0:02:23.200 out here watching within an hour. 0:02:23.520 --> 0:02:25.839 I'm quite good at what I do. People forget it's 0:02:25.880 --> 0:02:26.800 not simple. 0:02:27.080 --> 0:02:28.959 And you won't hesitate to remind them. 0:02:29.120 --> 0:02:31.440 I don't remind people enough if I really started to 0:02:31.440 --> 0:02:35.760 bring out the CV. You people are forgetting. 0:02:36.919 --> 0:02:38.880 Flex and rooms on Kata. 0:02:38.919 --> 0:02:45.400 Your residents, she eos, girl bosses, lady entrepreneurs, oh dear, 0:02:45.520 --> 0:02:48.360 oh dear, and we don't mind the titles. I actually 0:02:48.440 --> 0:02:51.200 quite encourage them, call us beta s babe. It is 0:02:51.240 --> 0:02:53.680 what it is. What I will say, though, is that 0:02:53.720 --> 0:02:57.680 we have a listener message in. It's about hustle culture broadly. 0:02:58.000 --> 0:02:58.720 Let's listen to it. 0:02:59.160 --> 0:03:03.160 Hey, Flex, Hey, I have a little question for you. 0:03:03.200 --> 0:03:05.480 I've been a big time fan of the show, but 0:03:05.520 --> 0:03:07.360 at the moment I've been seeing a lot of things 0:03:07.400 --> 0:03:10.440 about hustle culture. Now, what I mean by this is 0:03:11.120 --> 0:03:13.760 people doing side hustles on top of their actual jobs. 0:03:14.040 --> 0:03:15.840 I with so many friends that do it. There's like 0:03:16.000 --> 0:03:19.840 only fans to Instagram's TikTok. They're all doing these hot 0:03:20.000 --> 0:03:22.000 side hustles and I want to get into it, but 0:03:22.040 --> 0:03:25.360 I just don't know is it all hype? What do 0:03:25.360 --> 0:03:27.280 you reckon side hustles? Yay or nay? 0:03:27.520 --> 0:03:29.720 That's fascinating. I think we need to make a distinction 0:03:29.840 --> 0:03:32.840 between hustle culture and a side hustle because the two 0:03:33.120 --> 0:03:35.520 there's a correlation between the both of them, but they're 0:03:35.560 --> 0:03:38.760 not the same ven diagrams ven diagram as most things 0:03:38.760 --> 0:03:41.080 are when you really think about it. So we can 0:03:41.120 --> 0:03:44.640 assume hustle culture is this nine to five rise and 0:03:44.680 --> 0:03:47.680 grind capitalistic. You must early bird get to the worm, 0:03:48.080 --> 0:03:52.680 This overworking yourself to accumulate a success of some kind, 0:03:53.080 --> 0:03:55.520 and the idea that you know, the harder you work, 0:03:55.600 --> 0:03:58.360 the bigger the reward, or that in order to achieve 0:03:58.360 --> 0:04:01.040 the success you want, you need to work so much 0:04:01.160 --> 0:04:06.080 harder than what is expected, versus a side hustle, which 0:04:06.120 --> 0:04:08.520 is just an additional job on the side that might 0:04:08.560 --> 0:04:11.120 not be a career path, but another source of income 0:04:11.160 --> 0:04:12.240 at the very least. Correct. 0:04:12.360 --> 0:04:15.200 Okay, So I see the confusion in this ven diagram 0:04:15.240 --> 0:04:21.240 situation because I can't help but feel that side hustles 0:04:21.640 --> 0:04:23.640 are really a way to do what you actually want 0:04:23.640 --> 0:04:25.640 to do. So in order for you to do that properly, 0:04:25.839 --> 0:04:28.640 you have to bust your bussy to do it right. 0:04:29.520 --> 0:04:33.320 So I think it does inevitably come under the umbrella 0:04:33.360 --> 0:04:35.080 of hustle culture. I don't think you can do a 0:04:35.120 --> 0:04:37.359 side hustle properly without falling into that trap. 0:04:38.760 --> 0:04:41.640 I see what you're saying. That makes sense as well, 0:04:42.000 --> 0:04:44.680 because you could do it. The presumption is that you 0:04:44.680 --> 0:04:47.480 know you need your primary source of income so you 0:04:47.520 --> 0:04:51.080 can live and like really fulfill your Maslow's hierarchy of needs. 0:04:51.120 --> 0:04:53.840 Can I get a hoorrah? But also, if you want 0:04:53.839 --> 0:04:57.280 to do something in addition to well, you've tapped out, 0:04:57.279 --> 0:04:59.760 you've reached your quota, so anything above that is that 0:04:59.800 --> 0:05:03.520 you're above and beyond. I will say, though, as someone 0:05:03.560 --> 0:05:07.680 who's been side hustling, hustle culturing for the bulk of 0:05:07.680 --> 0:05:12.279 my career, I feel like the amount of effort it 0:05:12.360 --> 0:05:16.800 takes to do something the presumably easy way out, you 0:05:16.880 --> 0:05:18.760 might as well have done it properly. So you have 0:05:18.800 --> 0:05:20.680 people who are like I want to do a side hustle. 0:05:20.760 --> 0:05:22.919 Let's say I want to do only fans, for example. 0:05:23.000 --> 0:05:26.600 Right now, we've talked about only fans quite a bit, 0:05:26.800 --> 0:05:28.520 and the one thing that I feel that hasn't really 0:05:28.560 --> 0:05:31.080 come through is that only fans is a hard job. Yeah, 0:05:31.120 --> 0:05:33.520 it's a very difficult job, far harder than if you 0:05:33.560 --> 0:05:35.360 just want when I got a hospital job or a 0:05:35.440 --> 0:05:39.160 retail job. Absolutely, because not only are you let's say 0:05:39.160 --> 0:05:42.520 you're building your own schedule, but you are finding your 0:05:42.560 --> 0:05:46.120 own customer, then turning your customer into a loyal subscriber, 0:05:46.480 --> 0:05:49.919 then creating enough content to not only meet that subscriber's needs, 0:05:50.040 --> 0:05:53.360 but every other subscriber so they will continue to pay 0:05:53.400 --> 0:05:56.880 for this subscription. Now, let's say you've managed to get 0:05:56.920 --> 0:05:59.640 you know, let's say even one hundred subscribers. They need 0:05:59.680 --> 0:06:02.240 to make a rate that's competitive, because you have it's 0:06:02.279 --> 0:06:06.120 a saturated marketplace. When people can get access to pawn, video, image, 0:06:06.200 --> 0:06:09.920 whatever for free, now you're gonna charge for it. You 0:06:10.000 --> 0:06:13.400 need to make this service so appealing that the subscribers 0:06:13.400 --> 0:06:15.520 you were able to get you can sustain. Now I 0:06:15.520 --> 0:06:17.240 can imagine a lot of us. If you want to 0:06:17.240 --> 0:06:19.159 start only fans, we could get one hundred people to 0:06:19.160 --> 0:06:22.440 subscribe once. Yeah, ten dollars, one hundred fans, one thousand 0:06:22.440 --> 0:06:25.320 dollars before tax. Only fans got to take their cart. 0:06:25.960 --> 0:06:28.120 Ats can take their cart and know what I'm saying, 0:06:28.200 --> 0:06:33.039 not a suddenly you've made three hundred dollars for one month. 0:06:33.279 --> 0:06:35.800 You got to make a bunch of new content to 0:06:35.839 --> 0:06:39.640 get those same people to stay. It's not simple, and 0:06:39.640 --> 0:06:42.200 it's okay. Let's say you're able to sustain making three 0:06:42.279 --> 0:06:45.480 hundred dollars a month for three months. How many hours 0:06:45.480 --> 0:06:48.200 of work did you put into creating a profile, creating 0:06:48.320 --> 0:06:53.800 editing your content, sharing your content, joining discords, joining Twitch servers, 0:06:53.920 --> 0:06:57.960 joining reddits like all these things when realistically you can 0:06:58.000 --> 0:07:00.640 make thirty bucks an hour at a bar job and 0:07:00.680 --> 0:07:01.400 like call it a day. 0:07:01.880 --> 0:07:05.240 Well, I think you're saying harder work perhaps is the 0:07:05.320 --> 0:07:08.960 term I would think is contentious. Yeah, it's a different 0:07:09.000 --> 0:07:09.720 type of work. 0:07:09.880 --> 0:07:13.520 I think it's more either way. Yeah, I back myself 0:07:13.520 --> 0:07:15.360 when I say harder work. I think people don't know 0:07:15.400 --> 0:07:18.320 what it goes. I think, broadly speaking, people have no 0:07:18.440 --> 0:07:22.200 idea how hard it is to make good content. Content 0:07:22.200 --> 0:07:24.000 people want to pay for You don't you want to 0:07:24.000 --> 0:07:26.360 pay for your Netflix? And that's the top of the 0:07:26.400 --> 0:07:28.440 top of the quality. You know, people like I don't 0:07:28.440 --> 0:07:29.800 ever want to pay the eighteen and all. You don't 0:07:29.800 --> 0:07:32.480 want to pay for your Spotify access to the best 0:07:32.560 --> 0:07:34.320 music in the world. You want to pay your ten 0:07:34.360 --> 0:07:37.520 dollars a month, but you think, you know, you gotta 0:07:37.720 --> 0:07:40.360 a popular or tit pick and charge twenty bucks a 0:07:40.360 --> 0:07:42.560 month and you gotta kick the subscribers rolling in. I 0:07:42.600 --> 0:07:44.800 don't think that you have it. I really don't. I 0:07:44.800 --> 0:07:47.360 think people don't. They underestimate how hard it is to 0:07:47.480 --> 0:07:52.000 build a community, to communicate value, to keep people coming 0:07:52.120 --> 0:07:55.720 back to sell sex. It's all difficult stuff. And I 0:07:55.720 --> 0:07:59.240 don't think people realize how a lot of these other 0:07:59.320 --> 0:08:04.040 industries that are established and conventional, let's say, like I said, hospital, retail, 0:08:04.080 --> 0:08:06.840 officehob temp whatever, you don't have to go in and 0:08:06.840 --> 0:08:09.680 reinvent the wheel to get your money's worth. You sign 0:08:09.760 --> 0:08:13.320 that contract, you're entitled to your hourly rate regardless it's 0:08:13.360 --> 0:08:15.720 coming in, so like you don't even have to use 0:08:15.720 --> 0:08:18.480 your extra brain cells for that, and like that would 0:08:18.520 --> 0:08:21.360 be a lucrative side hustle off the jump. There's something 0:08:21.360 --> 0:08:24.960 about these unconventional side hustles, these like I'm gonna do 0:08:25.080 --> 0:08:30.600 surveys or I'm gonna, like you know, sell like I'm 0:08:30.600 --> 0:08:33.440 gonna learn how to make candles and sell them, like 0:08:33.679 --> 0:08:36.559 that feel like an easier option because they have the 0:08:36.600 --> 0:08:39.400 illusion of being less complex. Yeah, I'm gonna be my 0:08:39.440 --> 0:08:42.280 own boss, and so okay, cool. But now you've got 0:08:42.280 --> 0:08:45.480 to pay, like, you know, your taxes to the government 0:08:45.600 --> 0:08:48.040 on your own. You gotta do your own book keeping, 0:08:48.160 --> 0:08:50.840 you gotta write your own contracts. And suddenly you're like, okay, 0:08:51.040 --> 0:08:53.559 is it is this really? Is this a side hustle 0:08:53.640 --> 0:08:56.320 or is this a full time job that I'm doing pooring. 0:08:56.480 --> 0:08:58.600 I think everyone should do a side hustle if you 0:08:58.600 --> 0:09:02.480 want to make extra income, Like don't like, don't seclude 0:09:02.480 --> 0:09:04.480 yourself from the possibility of getting your bag because it 0:09:04.480 --> 0:09:07.360 could be difficult. But I would say, like, be weary 0:09:07.360 --> 0:09:09.400 of the people who are selling your pipe dream about 0:09:09.400 --> 0:09:11.160 it being not a lot of effort, not a lot 0:09:11.160 --> 0:09:11.480 of work. 0:09:12.160 --> 0:09:15.319 And I will say I'd look into just going on 0:09:15.320 --> 0:09:17.200 only fans and paying for some content. 0:09:18.480 --> 0:09:20.720 Why not, that's what you got from this whole thing. 0:09:22.000 --> 0:09:25.960 I would look into actually consuming some of this. 0:09:26.120 --> 0:09:29.160 Yeah, yeah, and no, but honestly thinking about it, like, oh, 0:09:29.480 --> 0:09:33.240 it could be like you know, why not because it's 0:09:33.280 --> 0:09:36.280 quite interesting. Like like Anna Paul, for example, I like 0:09:36.360 --> 0:09:39.600 following her, so I'm like, I like, this is other 0:09:39.679 --> 0:09:42.280 facet of her that would be interesting. You not pay 0:09:42.320 --> 0:09:42.959 for her only fans. 0:09:43.080 --> 0:09:45.120 You can see her Twitter where she promotes her content 0:09:45.240 --> 0:09:48.959 to get like an example of what she makes, right, 0:09:48.960 --> 0:09:49.520 because you can. 0:09:49.440 --> 0:09:50.280 Do nuty on Twitter. 0:09:50.320 --> 0:09:53.439 Hey yeah, and Sis is making porn. So you know 0:09:53.480 --> 0:09:55.120 what I'm saying, Like, I feel like people like they're 0:09:55.120 --> 0:09:57.920 deluding themselves. I will say, similar to what you said before, 0:09:58.040 --> 0:10:00.440 hustle culture. I don't think as a scam. I do 0:10:00.480 --> 0:10:03.800 think there's merit, like there are very clear ways to 0:10:03.880 --> 0:10:07.280 populus see and make an extra check. But I think 0:10:08.080 --> 0:10:12.200 the people online, especially who are trying to tell you 0:10:12.240 --> 0:10:15.240 that it's easy, have a vested interest in you thinking 0:10:15.240 --> 0:10:15.839 that it's easy. 0:10:15.880 --> 0:10:17.480 Oh I mean that's ridiculous, isn't it. 0:10:18.600 --> 0:10:23.200 That's just yeah, yeah, literally, like it's the MLM of 0:10:23.280 --> 0:10:26.680 like a. And if we're using only fans as an example, no, 0:10:26.760 --> 0:10:28.360 let's not. We've talked about it before. But I'm just 0:10:28.400 --> 0:10:32.120 saying house culture is real, like it is. That's how 0:10:32.120 --> 0:10:35.360 it works. You work more, you make more money. But 0:10:35.440 --> 0:10:38.959 I think of all the jobs to do, digital content 0:10:39.040 --> 0:10:41.160 creating is not the easiest one. 0:10:41.440 --> 0:10:43.080 Definitely not Yeah, definitely not. 0:10:43.679 --> 0:10:47.040 Cater flex and frooms, Flex and frooms. 0:10:46.960 --> 0:10:49.920 We are both not yet engaged. Would you get engaged 0:10:50.280 --> 0:10:51.439 coming to this red hot have we? 0:10:51.480 --> 0:10:54.000 Yeah, what's going on? Let's continue? 0:10:54.400 --> 0:10:59.520 Are you Polly you engaged? Would you do this? I 0:10:59.559 --> 0:11:01.599 love to say see people get married. I'd love to 0:11:01.600 --> 0:11:04.400 see the outfits, and I love to see the after video. 0:11:04.960 --> 0:11:07.559 Would I personally get an after video? Would I have 0:11:07.600 --> 0:11:11.400 a videographer running around taking videos of my wedding? I 0:11:11.400 --> 0:11:13.280 don't think I would. And I know this is a 0:11:13.360 --> 0:11:16.160 very contentious topic. I saw a TikTok the other day 0:11:16.360 --> 0:11:18.400 of a guy who's a videographer, and he said that 0:11:18.400 --> 0:11:20.840 he was doing regular wedding videos and then he did 0:11:20.840 --> 0:11:23.240 one that was like a documentary, so we get all 0:11:23.240 --> 0:11:26.520 the footage, but beforehand he'd have like entry interviews like 0:11:26.520 --> 0:11:28.680 you would on The Bachelor, with like the mum and 0:11:28.720 --> 0:11:31.000 the dad, Da da da. And he said since doing that, 0:11:31.240 --> 0:11:35.440 his jobs went up ten times of course. So do 0:11:35.440 --> 0:11:37.640 you think this is a good idea, having absolutely entry 0:11:37.679 --> 0:11:40.480 interviews with people who love the bride and the groom. 0:11:40.559 --> 0:11:42.320 Yeah, I'm so sorry. I just hate the idea that 0:11:42.360 --> 0:11:45.040 anything about a wedding or proposal should be accidental or 0:11:45.120 --> 0:11:47.679 like without a bit of cringe. If you're going to 0:11:47.720 --> 0:11:51.000 be spending upwards of fifty thousand, sixty one hundred thousand dollars. 0:11:51.040 --> 0:11:52.640 You think I'm not going to document it. You think 0:11:52.640 --> 0:11:54.000 I'm just gonna be like, oh no, I don't want 0:11:54.000 --> 0:11:57.079 an after video because no, no, I'm literally paying for 0:11:57.120 --> 0:11:59.920 people's attention for hours. You think I don't want to 0:11:59.920 --> 0:12:02.000 do document it? What do you think is happening here? 0:12:02.240 --> 0:12:04.120 If you propose to me you haven't got a secret 0:12:04.160 --> 0:12:07.560 little camera and a mic setup, You're wasting everybody's time. 0:12:07.880 --> 0:12:11.040 Our memories are so fallible. I don't remember yesterday, you 0:12:11.080 --> 0:12:13.880 think in the flurry of this surprise, I mean we 0:12:13.920 --> 0:12:15.839 were like and then he said, and then she said. 0:12:15.920 --> 0:12:17.280 When the girl is like, so what happened, I'm like, 0:12:17.320 --> 0:12:18.920 I don't know. I was just I don't want to 0:12:18.960 --> 0:12:21.240 do that. Now I'm letting down the girlies. Okay, I 0:12:21.280 --> 0:12:24.000 need all of it documented. And the vog style is 0:12:24.000 --> 0:12:26.080 really amazing because there's something about like a lot of 0:12:26.080 --> 0:12:28.960 what I don't like about weddings is how sanitized they become. 0:12:29.000 --> 0:12:30.839 That every wedding was like a carbon copy of the 0:12:30.920 --> 0:12:33.000 last wedding, And it's like, can we add some flavor? 0:12:33.080 --> 0:12:35.960 Can we have the in between moments that make it 0:12:35.960 --> 0:12:38.280 feel like a real event. That's why when I saw 0:12:38.280 --> 0:12:41.280 that TikTok of the girl who does social media content 0:12:41.320 --> 0:12:43.240 for weddings, So the girl who like walks around just 0:12:43.280 --> 0:12:45.760 with an iPhone and documents it from the perspective of 0:12:45.840 --> 0:12:47.439 just like a random guess, I'm like, that's what I'm 0:12:47.440 --> 0:12:49.480 talking about, because I will never see that. Remember when 0:12:49.480 --> 0:12:51.720 I went to my brother's wedding and they spent like 0:12:51.800 --> 0:12:54.840 a stack on this really intricate dessert table that they 0:12:54.840 --> 0:12:57.920 were never that they didn't see in the flesh because 0:12:57.920 --> 0:12:59.680 they were just busy doing other stuff. And I was like, 0:12:59.679 --> 0:13:01.559 you didn't see it, and they're like, no, they saw 0:13:01.600 --> 0:13:03.480 it at the end when it had just been more 0:13:03.640 --> 0:13:07.479 through by a bunch of animals. So document it all, please. 0:13:07.640 --> 0:13:10.240 Okay, good to know. I personally don't want anything to 0:13:10.280 --> 0:13:13.600 be documented. Keep the engagement separate, keep it private, keep 0:13:13.600 --> 0:13:16.559 it private, a small intimate ceremony, just my friends and family. 0:13:16.679 --> 0:13:17.040 I don't know. 0:13:17.080 --> 0:13:20.000 There's something about a video for following us around when 0:13:20.040 --> 0:13:21.280 the men are putting the ties on. 0:13:21.760 --> 0:13:23.520 I know that, like the little video of the woman's 0:13:23.520 --> 0:13:25.880 shoes on a pillow. Don't put up a ring camera then, 0:13:26.440 --> 0:13:28.320 you know, do a little ring camera. Do a little 0:13:28.400 --> 0:13:30.600 hidden video, hidden mic situation. You don't know where the 0:13:30.600 --> 0:13:33.680 cameras are. Let's get they'll find you. 0:13:33.800 --> 0:13:37.160 We need or a little lapel camera, you know, like 0:13:37.240 --> 0:13:38.680 a little little square camera. 0:13:38.880 --> 0:13:42.160 Everyone's got the ray bands on to take videos exactly. 0:13:43.040 --> 0:13:46.800 It's a lot flex and frooms of the suspicion that 0:13:46.800 --> 0:13:48.319 there's a ghost in the room with us. But two 0:13:48.320 --> 0:13:52.280 more important things, a moral dilemma. Picture this. You're at 0:13:52.360 --> 0:13:54.880 a birthday party with you know, a group of friends, 0:13:54.920 --> 0:13:57.720 some friends you know quite dearly, some are friends of friends. Whatever. 0:13:57.920 --> 0:14:00.600 You meet someone new, a mutual friend, and catch a 0:14:00.840 --> 0:14:03.079 bad vibe, nothing too crazy. You're just like, ah, it's 0:14:03.120 --> 0:14:05.000 not my person. Don't really feel good about it. You 0:14:05.000 --> 0:14:07.200 have a little bit to your friends, you let them know, like, ah, 0:14:07.160 --> 0:14:09.000 I don't like their vibe, but it is what it is. 0:14:09.000 --> 0:14:10.319 I'm not gonna make a big scene about just not 0:14:10.360 --> 0:14:13.160 my person. Now. A couple months later, a couple months 0:14:13.160 --> 0:14:16.400 go by, more mutual friend situations happen, more parties, more 0:14:16.440 --> 0:14:18.560 get togethers, and you actually realize that, like they just 0:14:18.559 --> 0:14:21.000 had a bad day. What you caught to be a 0:14:21.040 --> 0:14:23.080 bad vibe, which just a temporary thing. You actually quite 0:14:23.240 --> 0:14:25.160 like them, like quite a bit, to the point where 0:14:25.280 --> 0:14:27.840 your mutual friends are like, you're shady. You just spent 0:14:27.960 --> 0:14:30.040 that much time ripping into them, and now you think 0:14:30.080 --> 0:14:33.080 they're quite nice, and so they're expecting that you say 0:14:33.160 --> 0:14:35.680 something about it. What do you do in that situation? Oh, 0:14:35.720 --> 0:14:37.000 I hate this, it's not great. 0:14:37.040 --> 0:14:39.800 I think everyone's been guilty of this, making a judgment 0:14:39.880 --> 0:14:42.360 that is not informed. I think you're could be on 0:14:42.400 --> 0:14:44.440 a bit of a damaged control mission at this point. 0:14:45.680 --> 0:14:48.440 Confirm never to them, but to the friend. Like I 0:14:48.440 --> 0:14:51.160 think when you're like two years deep into the friendship, 0:14:51.200 --> 0:14:52.800 you can be like when I first met you. 0:14:52.720 --> 0:14:56.080 Like I wasn't sure what you were about. That was weird, But. 0:14:56.040 --> 0:14:57.640 Now I love you because you're my best friend. 0:14:58.560 --> 0:15:01.080 Would that make you insecure? Though, I'd be like, because 0:15:01.120 --> 0:15:03.640 what if the friend the one that initially had a 0:15:03.640 --> 0:15:05.080 bad vibe whatever, it was kind of like, oh, I 0:15:05.080 --> 0:15:06.800 always liked you, Like what what do you mean? 0:15:06.840 --> 0:15:06.880 Like? 0:15:06.920 --> 0:15:11.200 When was that they start getting like two year overdue anxiety. 0:15:12.600 --> 0:15:13.560 I just thought it was funny. 0:15:13.560 --> 0:15:16.400 When it's so tricky though, because again you do have 0:15:16.440 --> 0:15:18.640 to go on damage control straight away, because there's something 0:15:18.680 --> 0:15:23.080 about anybody with sound mind would recognize what's happened here? 0:15:23.240 --> 0:15:25.000 You made a judgment call and you were wrong. It 0:15:25.040 --> 0:15:26.720 happens all the time. But if your friends are going 0:15:26.720 --> 0:15:28.360 out of your way to call you out on it, 0:15:28.360 --> 0:15:30.240 it's like, okay, so are you gonna out me? Are 0:15:30.280 --> 0:15:32.960 you going to tell them what I said? Are you jealous? 0:15:33.080 --> 0:15:35.400 Are you going to jeopardize my new friendship? What's happening? 0:15:35.440 --> 0:15:37.120 He just let it go. I let it go, and 0:15:37.160 --> 0:15:38.920 I was one of the problem, so you'd let it go. 0:15:39.200 --> 0:15:40.920 I will say, though, don't let this to tell you 0:15:40.960 --> 0:15:45.680 from bitching by people. Never call it a day. Yeah, yeah, yeah, 0:15:45.680 --> 0:15:47.320 there's a time and place. There's a time and place 0:15:47.320 --> 0:15:49.080 and you could have been right right. 0:15:49.400 --> 0:15:51.560 Just have a think about that one. This is flex 0:15:51.600 --> 0:15:53.000 and Rooms on Kater. 0:15:52.960 --> 0:15:55.360 The day we answer an important question when pointing out 0:15:55.360 --> 0:15:59.400 something embarrassing on someone else? What matters more timing? Or tacked? 0:16:00.080 --> 0:16:00.320 Wow? 0:16:00.760 --> 0:16:05.480 What matters more? Tacked Ooh? Okay, the only reason why 0:16:05.480 --> 0:16:08.040 I asked. A couple of weeks ago, Aubrey Plaza was 0:16:08.160 --> 0:16:10.880 on stage at the SAG Awards winning some kind of award, 0:16:11.240 --> 0:16:14.160 and she was wearing like a crossover holton neck dress 0:16:14.200 --> 0:16:18.320 with some underboob, very high fashion, very incredible. Now she's 0:16:18.320 --> 0:16:21.160 walked the red carpet with her co stars. She's been sitting, 0:16:21.480 --> 0:16:23.680 you know, in the room with her co stars, and 0:16:23.720 --> 0:16:27.320 it wasn't up until she got into stage standing around 0:16:27.360 --> 0:16:29.880 with a bunch of guys and a fellow coastars. One 0:16:29.880 --> 0:16:32.160 of them kind of like points to her and turns 0:16:32.160 --> 0:16:34.880 his back to the camera and kind of like signals 0:16:34.880 --> 0:16:38.040 at her outfit, and then she kind of like holds 0:16:38.040 --> 0:16:40.360 her chest embarrassed, and then she's like freaking out about 0:16:40.360 --> 0:16:43.640 her outfit. And so you can't really clock what's happening here, 0:16:43.680 --> 0:16:46.200 but if you have, you know, any kind of awareness 0:16:46.200 --> 0:16:48.080 of social skills, you kind of have gathered that he's 0:16:48.120 --> 0:16:50.640 pointed out that she's having what he presumes to be 0:16:50.720 --> 0:16:53.480 a wardrobe malfunction. She was not. She was showing a 0:16:53.480 --> 0:16:56.000 little bit of under boob, and that is fine. What 0:16:56.080 --> 0:16:58.920 happened after was two things. The internet blown up saying, 0:16:58.960 --> 0:17:01.480 why does she look so am like, Why did she 0:17:01.520 --> 0:17:03.800 make that face on stage of all the time to 0:17:03.880 --> 0:17:06.320 do that? Why was she more aware of her surroundings. 0:17:06.560 --> 0:17:08.920 It's so odd like she's making it about her, She's 0:17:09.000 --> 0:17:11.880 drawing attention to herself. Right then I took then people 0:17:11.920 --> 0:17:14.240 were like, wait a second. She didn't just like react 0:17:14.280 --> 0:17:17.760 out of nowhere. She responded to him saying something to her, 0:17:18.320 --> 0:17:21.040 let's play the tapes. And so what's happened is that 0:17:21.080 --> 0:17:23.640 he's turned his back to the camera. So obviously she's like, whoa, 0:17:23.640 --> 0:17:25.720 what happened to you? Like what's going on? And then 0:17:25.760 --> 0:17:28.560 he's pointed at her chest and whatever he said was 0:17:28.600 --> 0:17:31.080 not The timing wasn't great, and the tact wasn't great. 0:17:31.240 --> 0:17:33.879 So she freaked out and looked visibly annoyed, like she 0:17:34.040 --> 0:17:37.320 had embarrassed everybody around her, only to find out there 0:17:37.359 --> 0:17:41.320 was no malfunction to begin with. And so my question 0:17:41.520 --> 0:17:46.159 is what could he have done better? Right timing or tacked? 0:17:46.359 --> 0:17:50.320 One might assume the timing wasn't great. Right, you're on stage, 0:17:50.359 --> 0:17:53.560 you're winning the award? Was there anything else he could 0:17:53.600 --> 0:17:56.040 have done? We don't know what he said, so we 0:17:56.080 --> 0:17:59.280 can't assume that he didn't have tacked. But what ensued 0:17:59.440 --> 0:18:02.919 was this really fascinated conversation that like initially went to 0:18:03.000 --> 0:18:06.399 like she was the problem, and it's like she's a victim. 0:18:06.920 --> 0:18:09.640 Can I take us back to Justin Tim Blake and 0:18:10.240 --> 0:18:14.240 Janet Jackson. He reveals her bust causes her to have 0:18:14.280 --> 0:18:17.480 a water malfunction. Now she's the fluozy. Now she should 0:18:17.520 --> 0:18:17.960 have known better. 0:18:18.080 --> 0:18:19.119 I can't believe it, do you. 0:18:19.160 --> 0:18:21.040 Know what I mean? And it's like I'm not gonna 0:18:21.040 --> 0:18:23.800 say we're sensing a trend, but I do want to 0:18:23.840 --> 0:18:26.560 say I just feel like there was a level of 0:18:26.600 --> 0:18:29.600 awareness that was missing, Like so there were so many 0:18:29.680 --> 0:18:33.000 points in time when they were him and Aubrey. I 0:18:33.040 --> 0:18:34.760 don't know what the guy's name is, sorry, sorry king? 0:18:34.840 --> 0:18:38.359 Which one really look like just like John something, John Grees, 0:18:38.400 --> 0:18:39.400 John Gray. I don't know the. 0:18:39.400 --> 0:18:43.400 Older guy in the past. I feel like this is important, 0:18:43.400 --> 0:18:44.239 but no older guy. 0:18:44.520 --> 0:18:45.879 He was an older guy, but I don't know if 0:18:45.880 --> 0:18:48.800