Speaker 1: Hi, and welcome to Outspoken.
Speaker 2: Today, we're joined by special guest Ella Jermaine to talk
Speaker 2: all things relationships and dating, from what constitutes cheating, what
Speaker 2: to do if he doesn't reply, and what a guy's
Speaker 2: Instagram really says about him. So, Ella, thank you for
Speaker 2: joining us for this very impromptued dating.
Speaker 3: Advice we go.
Speaker 2: So last week we answered some of the listener's dating
Speaker 2: questions and then it got us thinking we kind of
Speaker 2: didn't want to answer questions, but we kind of wanted
Speaker 2: to talk more about topics in general that might help
Speaker 2: people out.
Speaker 4: So sure, I don't know, because we all know everything.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because you know we're sitting here on our high
Speaker 2: horses here.
Speaker 3: Well, the first topic is.
Speaker 2: All about micro cheating or what actually constitutes cheating. So
Speaker 2: I heard another podcast and they were talking about micro
Speaker 2: cheating as basically, you know, say you were going out
Speaker 2: with someone, but you might be liking your ex's photos
Speaker 2: or you might reply to their text.
Speaker 1: What is this?
Speaker 2: How people think that watching porn is cheating? Is this
Speaker 2: kind of what you're yeah, or as in, what do
Speaker 2: you what would you guys classify as cheating? And maybe
Speaker 2: the you know, would you classify like would you classify
Speaker 2: liking an ex's photo, it was kind of cheating.
Speaker 4: I think it's there's so many factors that you have
Speaker 4: to consider. I think it depends what relationship you have
Speaker 4: with your ex. If it's like a fresh one a
Speaker 4: week ago, you shouldn't probably be in a relationship anyway
Speaker 4: with someone else. But I think it's all about Yeah,
Speaker 4: I think it's the relationship that you have with that ex.
Speaker 4: If it's a friend and they're off married and they're
Speaker 4: just like one of my exes just had a baby recently.
Speaker 4: Oh well, like just photo said, oh, congrat I thought
Speaker 4: it was super cute. I have no emotional feelings towards
Speaker 4: him in that way, but I was happy for him
Speaker 4: and that was I think that was fine for me.
Speaker 4: I don't have a boy for it at the moment,
Speaker 4: but I'm sure if I did, I feel like that
Speaker 4: would be a reasonable thing. But I think it just
Speaker 4: depends if you've got an intent as well, just to
Speaker 4: wish someone well, that's right, but if there's an intent
Speaker 4: to try and maybe see if they're still interested. I
Speaker 4: know boys do it to girls as well, have girlfriends,
Speaker 4: just to sort of see if they're still you know,
Speaker 4: might give something back. I think one of you guys
Speaker 4: said that in one of your recent ones about you know,
Speaker 4: an old X came up at two in the morning.
Speaker 2: Yea.
Speaker 4: You just sort of wonder what the intent is behind that.
Speaker 4: So I think if there's no foul intent and it's
Speaker 4: just wishing someone well and happy for them, then that's fine.
Speaker 4: But you also have to have that trust with your
Speaker 4: partner as well. And if they do call you out
Speaker 4: on it and see that you've liked to photo, I don't.
Speaker 4: I've never done that before. I didn't even know you
Speaker 4: could see what someone else likes, so I didn't even
Speaker 4: know that was a thing.
Speaker 1: But I've thought she taking that away now.
Speaker 2: It's so very disappointed about that she likes to stork.
Speaker 2: We actually had a question we didn't get to answer
Speaker 2: last week from a listener who said, who do you
Speaker 2: guys think should pay on a first date?
Speaker 4: I always like to offer and or like go half,
Speaker 4: but if the guy's like, no, insist, I'm like, oh sure,
Speaker 4: but like yeah, I don't know. I think it's like
Speaker 4: you gotta yeah. I think sometimes girls like the guys
Speaker 4: should pay for everything, But then everyone wants equal women's rights.
Speaker 4: I'm like, have it both ways, Like you know, you
Speaker 4: gotta if you're gonna if you want everyone to be equal,
Speaker 4: then you gotta be the same. But I think it's like,
Speaker 4: but some guys really like to spoil girls as well
Speaker 4: and like to offer if someone Always my mum always
Speaker 4: said if someone like gives you a gift or something,
Speaker 4: you should take it gracefully and say thank you. So
Speaker 4: it's like the same thing paying for dinner as well.
Speaker 4: But yeah, I usually try and offer if they buy dinner,
Speaker 4: I might buy ice cream after, or you know, like
Speaker 4: just even enough. So because I don't, I don't you
Speaker 4: never want to be like the sponge bun. I don't know.
Speaker 4: I don't want to ever think people come spongy.
Speaker 2: And I'll say some people get offended if they say no, no,
Speaker 2: and if you're there like trying to throw your card over.
Speaker 2: I think some guys take that offense. It looks like
Speaker 2: you're not interested in them. It can look like you're saying, well,
Speaker 2: this isn't really a date, this is just a friendship thing.
Speaker 4: But in saying that as well, also not just because
Speaker 4: someone pays for something. I know some girls that have
Speaker 4: been had these amazing dinners and being spoiled with gifts
Speaker 4: and things, and then they feel like they're expected to
Speaker 4: do other things in return, which also is another thing.
Speaker 4: Just because someone pays for you doesn't mean that you
Speaker 4: need to return favors in other ways to say thank
Speaker 4: you if you want to go for it, and that's
Speaker 4: always a great way to I'm not going to say
Speaker 4: a cheap way to like say thanks for dinner. But
Speaker 4: I don't know, No, I've never done that, No, but
Speaker 4: I'm just yeah, like I think it's you don't. You
Speaker 4: don't owe anyone anything. If they're giving you a gift,
Speaker 4: they shouldn't expect anything in return. That's the same with
Speaker 4: you if you give someone something. Sometimes, like I said before,
Speaker 4: with intent, girls will be like give all this things
Speaker 4: and expecting something back, and when they don't get it,
Speaker 4: they get pissed off. But it's like, if you're giving
Speaker 4: a gift, you should do it just generally because you
Speaker 4: want to make them happy. And yeah, exactly talking about dating.
Speaker 2: For people out there who might be dating at the
Speaker 2: moment and a guy hasn't text them back, what do
Speaker 2: you guys think, Like, Ella, what do you think the
Speaker 2: goal is? Do you think that they should text them again? Like,
Speaker 2: do you have a text double text or is it
Speaker 2: just like letting go It's not.
Speaker 4: It's a tough one because I think it totally. Yeah,
Speaker 4: it just depends, like I think if you if you
Speaker 4: generally I'm wondering how they're bit and you just want
Speaker 4: to check in on the day. I think there's nothing
Speaker 4: wrong with it. Oh, hate when I see my friends
Speaker 4: sitting home like, oh I haven't heard back from I'm like,
Speaker 4: just call him and see if he's like, what's up?
Speaker 4: And if he doesn't reply, then usually it's sort of
Speaker 4: like two strikes, you're out, or maybe just two strikes
Speaker 4: and let it cool for a bit. And if you
Speaker 4: don't hear from it's probably not meant to be or
Speaker 4: they're probably not as keen as you think. And like
Speaker 4: I said, there's lots of lovely people out there that
Speaker 4: will give you time a day. But yeah, I think
Speaker 4: just not going too crazy with it either. And just
Speaker 4: I think when I was younger, I used to be like, oh,
Speaker 4: they you know my first boyfriend, if we left it
Speaker 4: a few hours, I'd get all, you know, what's he doing?
Speaker 4: But like I think as you get older, you realize, yeah,
Speaker 4: like people so busy or someone might be driving, or
Speaker 4: they might just have a busy day at work, or
Speaker 4: and sometimes it's nice not always texting back and forth
Speaker 4: because then you can leave it until you catch up,
Speaker 4: so and you have more things to talk about.
Speaker 3: So the worst thing.
Speaker 2: Is I feel like it makes you like people more
Speaker 2: when they're a little bit aloof.
Speaker 4: So, yeah, my mom's always like, be mean to che
Speaker 4: even keen, like keeping keen, and I'm just like, but yeah,
Speaker 4: I find it hard to be mean in tell, I
Speaker 4: don't really like playing the game, as they say. But yeah,
Speaker 4: I think if you're keen, you're keen. If you're not,
Speaker 4: you're not.
Speaker 2: But I think it's hard too because there's so many
Speaker 2: different platforms that you can be rejected on, Like I
Speaker 2: know that's in that movie like.
Speaker 3: That Into You.
Speaker 2: I remember back in the day, if someone hadn't replied
Speaker 2: to my text, they didn't see them on Instagram the
Speaker 2: little green button was on, or they're on Facebook, it
Speaker 2: would be even more offensive because they obviously got their
Speaker 2: phone in their hand.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think the thing with ghosting and stuff, I
Speaker 4: think there's a level of respect as well. And if
Speaker 4: you've had a genuine relationship or connection with someone and
Speaker 4: then they just ghost you. I think that just shows
Speaker 4: more about them than about you. I think it's quite
Speaker 4: disrespectful sometimes to completely cut someone out, especially if you've
Speaker 4: had a good relationship and things like that. But everyone
Speaker 4: has their reasons. But I always think for me, I
Speaker 4: like to leave things like this sounds so grim, but
Speaker 4: I'm always like, if someone was in a car accident
Speaker 4: or something happened, how would you want your last words
Speaker 4: to be with them? How would you want to feel
Speaker 4: that you left things with them?
Speaker 3: What about we're talking about dating?
Speaker 2: Have you like, will you guys go and sort of
Speaker 2: say you've been set up on a blind date or
Speaker 2: if you've met on a dating app or whatever? How
Speaker 2: far in will you guys actually.
Speaker 3: Stalk that person online?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 2: Will you get will you guys have a stalk?
Speaker 3: What's this?
Speaker 4: If you got set up on a date?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Like or even if you've just met someone on a
Speaker 2: first date, do you go and have a cheeky Facebook
Speaker 2: and instagrams?
Speaker 1: If you like them or not?
Speaker 4: I've never maybe a little bit, but not you don't
Speaker 4: want to go into but like if it was, I'm
Speaker 4: not like about animal cruelty or anything like that. So
Speaker 4: I think if they maybe holding up a dead kangaroo
Speaker 4: that they're culed or something I might be a bit like,
Speaker 4: or if they were putting up racial bits and pieces,
Speaker 4: maybe that that would be good. Maybe it'd be good
Speaker 4: to know prior. But if you're going to have any conflict.
Speaker 2: I was gonna say, well, being in a band, I
Speaker 2: feel like a lot of guys would probably stalk you
Speaker 2: out And do.
Speaker 3: You have you ever had that?
Speaker 4: Yeah, oh well there's I think that sometimes the issue
Speaker 4: with the band thing is, like we were saying before
Speaker 4: social media, it can look really cool you're doing, but
Speaker 4: only put out best pictures or the best things that
Speaker 4: we go and do, like shows and things. But that's
Speaker 4: like literally ten percent of my life most of the time.
Speaker 4: So for me, it's more finding people that want to
Speaker 4: get to know me, for me and a supportive of me,
Speaker 4: whether I'm doing music or doing something else. But yeah,
Speaker 4: you did get a few slides in the DMS. I
Speaker 4: haven't had anything too creepy over the years. Maybe if
Speaker 4: you want bits and pieces and pictures that I'm like.
Speaker 4: To be honest, I would never probably date someone from
Speaker 4: social media straight up. I'd probably I like to meet
Speaker 4: people in person first, But you never know, Sorr.
Speaker 2: If you you would have to have stalked out people
Speaker 2: that you're about to date.
Speaker 1: Yes, I'm a big stalker.
Speaker 2: The tip I would give any boys who are listening
Speaker 2: is remove any photos of yourself at school, because I.
Speaker 1: Feel like all boys have like very few photos of.
Speaker 4: The old haircuts with the sweep to the side.
Speaker 2: If you're an older gal dating a younger guy, is
Speaker 2: that what you make solf? Well, I remember when I
Speaker 2: first looked a friend's page and I was flicking back
Speaker 2: and it got a bit too young, you know what
Speaker 2: I mean, when it gets too.
Speaker 1: Young and you're kind of like, holy fuck, isn't that big?
Speaker 3: So yeah, I think.
Speaker 2: But also boys don't seem to put up as many
Speaker 2: glamorous photos as girls, so I feel like you've got
Speaker 2: to be particular with what you've got up there. Yeah,
Speaker 2: for gout, there's nothing more unattractive though, when a guy
Speaker 2: just posts too much about themselves. On the other hand,
Speaker 2: as well, like you know when you look at some
Speaker 2: guys accounts and they're just all photos of them with
Speaker 2: their tops off or very I don't know, very vain.
Speaker 4: I've had two guys I saw over the last couple
Speaker 4: of years didn't have Instagram or any social media. It
Speaker 4: was kind of good because you just enjoy the moment
Speaker 4: and it's not about getting that perfect picture or getting
Speaker 4: that And I'm always very private anyway with if I'm
Speaker 4: ever dating or anything not that. It's very uncommon carrots,
Speaker 4: So it's no one's business, is it.
Speaker 2: Sometimes when people go on and on about the particular
Speaker 2: person in their life, sometimes I feel like maybe their
Speaker 2: relationship isn't going that well. But there can be that
Speaker 2: fine line between sharing a little bit and sharing too much.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Like for me personally, yeah, I just yeah, haven't,
Speaker 4: but like, but I know you guys do. So it's
Speaker 4: to colors and I think it's cute.
Speaker 2: On a different topic, what do you guys think about
Speaker 2: girls making the first move, as in either asking a
Speaker 2: guy out, leaning in for that kiss, or whatever.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm pretty confident if you're a good flatter, I
Speaker 4: think you can gauge whether that's gonna happen or not.
Speaker 4: And some guys are really shy as well, so I
Speaker 4: think you've got to also give them the signals too.
Speaker 4: So I think guys are just as shy to come
Speaker 4: up to a group of girls. Some girls will be
Speaker 4: out and they're like, oh, no one's approaching us. And
Speaker 4: you know, but it must be so intimidating coming up
Speaker 4: to a group of girls like that, fear of rejection,
Speaker 4: and girls can be quite sassy. And I definitely know
Speaker 4: if you're my friends, you know, make them work hard,
Speaker 4: but it must be so scary, and especially if some
Speaker 4: really nice guys as well. So if you sort of
Speaker 4: give them a little bit of a give them a
Speaker 4: little bit of a hint that maybe you might be interested,
Speaker 4: whether it's like a smile or just maybe crack a
Speaker 4: joke or if you like, oh like your share. I
Speaker 4: don't do that. Oh, I don't know. Maybe I've done it. Yeah,
Speaker 4: I've probably done it before. I'm just I just like
Speaker 4: rabiting on and sometimes probably I flirt without realizing it
Speaker 4: and then I get myself into trouble a bit later.
Speaker 4: But that's all right.
Speaker 2: But that's a good thing because it's not like you're like, hey,
Speaker 2: I want to go out. It's like you're just you're
Speaker 2: just creating conversation. But I feel and they feel comfortable, yeah,
Speaker 2: and I feel like there's nothing that.
Speaker 4: I think.
Speaker 2: There's nothing wrong though with a girl asking a guy
Speaker 2: to do something I mean, I think back to our
Speaker 2: mum and dad. Our mum actually asked our dad out
Speaker 2: on their first date.
Speaker 1: So you know, you never know what's going to happen
Speaker 1: from it.
Speaker 4: And if you like what you see, or if you've
Speaker 4: got a good vibe with someone or you had a
Speaker 4: nice connection, life's too short to sit around and wait
Speaker 4: for them to message you. And if you think they're cool,
Speaker 4: then just flick them a message or just say hey,
Speaker 4: it was really nice meeting. You can watch you up
Speaker 4: to and if the conversation flows and maybe you see
Speaker 4: each other again, or you just find like those little
Speaker 4: common places that you might see each other again, but
Speaker 4: just not in a Stockrish way, like don't be too crazy.
Speaker 2: But yeah, guys can be pretty piss week, you know
Speaker 2: what I mean, And they might think that you're either
Speaker 2: out of their league or they don't you know, they
Speaker 2: don't have that confidence to ask you something. So it
Speaker 2: is good to let people I know that you are interested. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I think Ozzie guys are pissed week. Because you know
Speaker 2: you've been in the UK. Do you find men are
Speaker 2: different over there?
Speaker 4: It is a lot different there's but I think there's
Speaker 4: a lot of chivalry over in the UK Europe. There's
Speaker 4: a lot of that in that culture, and I think
Speaker 4: there's a lot more confidence as well. And yeah, they
Speaker 4: certainly know how to say the right things, but I
Speaker 4: think it's ausy girls. You're so installed like when a
Speaker 4: guy gives you a compliment that what do you want?
Speaker 4: Like you know what I mean? Like you don't just
Speaker 4: think they're being nice. So I've learned to sort of
Speaker 4: change my perception of that with people when they give
Speaker 4: you compliments. But yeah, like it's it's all a bit different.
Speaker 4: I think you're true.
Speaker 2: Well, another question that's popped up is how do you
Speaker 2: impress your partner's parents and do you have any funny
Speaker 2: experiences with trying to impress them or meeting them.
Speaker 4: I think it's always just good to give, maybe like
Speaker 4: when the first time, maybe bringing some biscuits or like
Speaker 4: flowers for the mom or I had a overseas fella
Speaker 4: for a while, so bringing some Australian goods was always
Speaker 4: went down to hoot and he'd bring back some stuff
Speaker 4: from his country for me.
Speaker 3: So that's a good one.
Speaker 4: Yeah, And also maybe asking a few questions before you
Speaker 4: go in what the parents are interested in. I think
Speaker 4: asking them questions. It's not all about you don't want
Speaker 4: to go in like you're trying to impress them, but
Speaker 4: also being really interested about maybe their work, whether they're
Speaker 4: like an engineer or whether they're a nurse or whatever
Speaker 4: they do. So you kind of got some common ground
Speaker 4: to get some conversations throw. And you guys would probably
Speaker 4: be good at it, and I'm not too bad at
Speaker 4: it just because of our journalism background, probably you're used
Speaker 4: to getting those conversations going. But for girls out there
Speaker 4: listening that maybe aren't so confident always doing that little
Speaker 4: bit of research. Just pretend it's like.
Speaker 3: A little ask a lot of questions.
Speaker 4: Well yeah, lots of questions.
Speaker 3: But yeah, you say that we'd be good at it.
Speaker 2: But my first ever boyfriend, apparently his dad's first impression
Speaker 2: of me was that I like shiny.
Speaker 1: Things, shiny things, so apparently I managed.
Speaker 2: He was actually a judge, so I felt very nervous
Speaker 2: meaning him.
Speaker 1: So I don't know.
Speaker 2: I think he saw the blonde hair and just my
Speaker 2: clothing and assume that I was something that I wasn't,
Speaker 2: and then later.
Speaker 3: I managed to win him over.
Speaker 2: Oh I know, yeah, it is hard to make it.
Speaker 1: I feel like it's hard sometimes with the dads.
Speaker 2: I don't know, because I feel like with the mums
Speaker 2: you've got something in common, but it's always good to
Speaker 2: think of something with the duds. It depends like if
Speaker 2: it's sometimes it's kind of I don't know. Sometimes I
Speaker 2: feel like it's easier to suck up to old men.
Speaker 2: I know that sounds really weird, but I don't know.
Speaker 1: You can just pund yeah.
Speaker 2: I feel like it is just finding that common ground.
Speaker 2: I know when I met Dave was one she wasn't
Speaker 2: very impressed with Dale because he was moving to Sydney
Speaker 2: and she's like, why is he dating this girl from Adelaide?
Speaker 2: But we bonded over our love of cats. I feel like,
Speaker 2: once you find yeah, just go for it.
Speaker 4: And forgoing at the end of the yeah, and always
Speaker 4: be yourself as well, And I think, yeah, definitely, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4: I haven't had to do this for a while though,
Speaker 4: so I don't know if I out of the game.
Speaker 3: It's just good prep for your next boyfriend.
Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I feel like if you go out and you're looking
Speaker 2: for a boyfriend as well, you're never going to find someone.
Speaker 2: What's that thing on sex and the City, because it's
Speaker 2: only when they're like their cavlights on. Yeah, And I
Speaker 2: feel that's so true as in when you start getting
Speaker 2: in your late twenties or your early thirties, Yeah, I
Speaker 2: feel like you meet men who are actually looking for
Speaker 2: a partner. When everyone was in the early twenties, I
Speaker 2: feel like boys were just such a dickhead. They just
Speaker 2: wanted to just you know, you guys, most guys, most
Speaker 2: you know what I mean, They just wanted to mess
Speaker 2: around with heaps of girls. But then it's funny now
Speaker 2: because with my younger cousins now, when I see that
Speaker 2: they're in their early twenties, I'm like.
Speaker 1: They should be going out having fun.
Speaker 4: But then when you're in a relation, you're in life.
Speaker 4: I always think that, like feeling Madison, like still young
Speaker 4: as long as you can.
Speaker 2: But it's so funny with you, like I see I
Speaker 2: see them now and they're like the same age as
Speaker 2: people I used to go out with, and I'm like, fuck,
Speaker 2: why was I expecting something so serious from someone who was,
Speaker 2: you know, in the early twenties.
Speaker 4: Yeah, which is all like a learning thing. Yeah, Like
Speaker 4: if it works out for people in their early twenties,
Speaker 4: and that's awesome, and you know, some people don't meet
Speaker 4: the love of their life until they're in their fifties,
Speaker 4: and that's totally fine as well. So I think, like
Speaker 4: being caught in something that you're not happy in or
Speaker 4: you know, it's better. I always say like to my
Speaker 4: friends as well, just you know, when they're not sure
Speaker 4: or if they've been in relationships in the past where
Speaker 4: they're like, I don't know if they're my soulmate, but
Speaker 4: I don't know, I'm scared I'm not going to find
Speaker 4: anyone else, And I'm like, well, just think of yourself
Speaker 4: in five years, like would you what would they be
Speaker 4: telling you to do now? Because the worst thing is
Speaker 4: getting into a situation which is unfair on both parties
Speaker 4: that you're going to be in this you know, whether
Speaker 4: it's financial or like housing or kids and things like that.
Speaker 4: If you weren't really invested five years ago, you know,
Speaker 4: you might be stopping them from meeting someone awesome and
Speaker 4: stopping yourself. So it's better to sort of nip things
Speaker 4: in the bard when you start getting those fiels, but
Speaker 4: also not completely ditching it before you know giving it
Speaker 4: a shot. Working out obviously just depends on the circumstances.
Speaker 2: I feel like, that's such a good point because I've
Speaker 2: heard of so many people these days just having the
Speaker 2: pressure to be in a relationship and just and settling
Speaker 2: like that would be my worst nightmare, because I feel
Speaker 2: like on the outside sometimes you can look in at
Speaker 2: people's relationships and be like, oh wow, they look so good,
Speaker 2: but you never really know what's bubbling away under the surface.
Speaker 2: And I just think nobody should settle. But as you said,
Speaker 2: I feel like it's really good advice to just give
Speaker 2: people a go though that you might not think you like,
Speaker 2: because so many relationships start off like that as well,
Speaker 2: but it's not necessarily settling, like you still have to
Speaker 2: have that feeling.
Speaker 4: Of yeah, you can like that little spark as well.
Speaker 4: I always I've said as well, it's kind of like,
Speaker 4: you know, when you have those two waging what are
Speaker 4: they called, when you've got like weights, like, oh, like
Speaker 4: a pendulum kind of yeah, is that right? Yeah, it's
Speaker 4: like a good there's a good Like so you've got
Speaker 4: two buckets. There's a good bucket and a bad bucket,
Speaker 4: and it's all right, both of them are filled with
Speaker 4: good stuff and bad stuff. But when the bad bucket
Speaker 4: starts getting filled up with more things and then it's
Speaker 4: too heavy to carry. Then you know that's not you know,
Speaker 4: probably not right.
Speaker 3: I think we'll probably do our last question.
Speaker 1: So we've got to go.
Speaker 4: I've got a life to leave. I just paid it
Speaker 4: a pea. I don't really I might go to the
Speaker 4: gym and run or something. Yeah, but it's been fun.
Speaker 4: I could talk to you guys, I know, I feel
Speaker 4: like this could.
Speaker 3: Go for hours, but you might have to be oh gosh,
Speaker 3: I don't know.
Speaker 4: You might not have me back after your rating.
Speaker 3: On Kate out and bring you and the just pretend
Speaker 3: you're all.
Speaker 4: Three sisters, three sisters.
Speaker 2: The last questions I thought might be helpful to some
Speaker 2: of the listeners if they're young, is what are some
Speaker 2: ways that girls can tell that boys actually like them?
Speaker 4: If your conversation is important, like obviously the conversation it
Speaker 4: can be good starting off on the computer, on your
Speaker 4: phone or whatever, but also making sure you have that
Speaker 4: compatibility when you're in person, face to face, and that
Speaker 4: you can you know, like it just depends. But there's
Speaker 4: no rush at or anyone listening out there, like you've
Speaker 4: got plenty of time to worry about boyfriends and girlfriends.
Speaker 4: But yeah, there is someone that you're keen on and
Speaker 4: even just having a chat but keeping it catch you
Speaker 4: don't want to come into strong but I think just
Speaker 4: you know, you can just say, oh, like, yeah, you're
Speaker 4: fun to hang out with, and then just see the vibes.
Speaker 4: I don't know this is so, I'm so I don't
Speaker 4: know if.
Speaker 2: This is so. That is I was going to say,
Speaker 2: that's a really good point though about the talking online,
Speaker 2: because I feel like even more so people do either
Speaker 2: you know, dropping or whatever what is it called, like
Speaker 2: slip into the deeps, got into the dms or whatever.
Speaker 2: But yeah, sometimes you can have a really good conversation
Speaker 2: with someone over messenger and then you meet up Oh.
Speaker 1: My god, is this the same person?
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: But that being said, going back to like how to
Speaker 2: tell if they like you, I think if you're already
Speaker 2: having doubts and you're already having that kind of gut
Speaker 2: feeling that perhaps they're not interested, I think you've maybe
Speaker 2: sometimes got to listen to that, because I feel like
Speaker 2: if someone is interested in you, they'll make it obvious,
Speaker 2: they'll get back to your messages promptly.
Speaker 1: They won't kind of I don't know.
Speaker 4: I feel like, yeah, I feel like that gut feeling.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 2: I've been in situations where people haven't replied or played games.
Speaker 2: And then boys, Yeah, and when you get into a
Speaker 2: relationship where you feel comfortable and it's a good relationship,
Speaker 2: you realize that, Okay, those guys perhaps just weren't that
Speaker 2: keen on me, or we're looking for something that I
Speaker 2: wasn't looking for.
Speaker 4: So yeah, and I think girls have such good intuition
Speaker 4: boys as well, probably as well. I'm not sure it's
Speaker 4: like to be a fellow, but yeah, like I know,
Speaker 4: you know, you're always trust your gut, I think, and
Speaker 4: at the end of the day, sometimes we can overthink things,
Speaker 4: but I think trust your gut. But yeah, also take
Speaker 4: a chance. That's probably my best advice for anyone out
Speaker 4: there that's keen. But obviously there's no rush to meet anyone.
Speaker 4: But if you do meet someone that you get along
Speaker 4: with and you're looking for maybe a partner or just
Speaker 4: a good relationship, yeah, give him a go. And if
Speaker 4: even if it's someone that you might not share common
Speaker 4: ground with, Like in the past, I've sometimes always dated
Speaker 4: creative people, but then sometimes you meet someone else that
Speaker 4: might offer something else that you never even knew you expected,
Speaker 4: so I think that's really cool as well. So just
Speaker 4: giving people a chance and yeah, but also respecting yourself
Speaker 4: enough to know when to leave, and also leave with
Speaker 4: dignity and treat them with respect as well. So no
Speaker 4: one's feelings are hurt.
Speaker 2: But such a good point though, because I feel like
Speaker 2: you do have to be happy within yourself. You can't
Speaker 2: just want someone to fix all of your problems.
Speaker 3: That's so true.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I was gonna say now, I hope one
Speaker 2: of Kate's colleagues he's got a big crush on Elbert's
Speaker 2: this because he might be able to take some He
Speaker 2: might be taking some notes down and I won't name names,
Speaker 2: but if you're listening, just take note.
Speaker 4: No no, oh god, I to slide into Ellen's I'm
Speaker 4: just joke. He doesn't know.
Speaker 3: Well, thank you so well to care.
Speaker 4: Think it's been so much fun.
Speaker 3: It's very valuable advice. I feel like we have to
Speaker 3: have you on the show again. I'm happy to come down.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I've enjoyed this sugar free marshmallows, the chocolate, and
Speaker 4: I alsoy I cracked into the chocol that you gave
Speaker 4: me to so working hard at the gym past.
Speaker 1: Thanks again, thank you, thank you so much for listening.
Speaker 2: If you have enjoyed today's episode, please leave us a
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Speaker 1: We would also absolutely love
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