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Speaker 1: The Will and Woody podcast that bite sized.

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Speaker 2: Right now, I mean struth almighty. A woman called Brittany

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Speaker 2: has committed some extraordinary blunders as a housemate and these

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Speaker 2: were shared on TikTok by her former housemate Maggie. So

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Speaker 2: this woman, Brittany has now been evicted. But when you

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Speaker 2: see the list, and I'm going to read the.

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Speaker 3: List to your will read that list to me baby.

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Speaker 2: For me, she had just so many blunders here. That

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Speaker 2: is an instant eviction.

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Speaker 4: Right, I think that's eviction is a strong word. Strong words,

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Speaker 4: I should say, yeah.

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Speaker 2: They are very strong words, because it's a fine line

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Speaker 2: between do I have the chat with my housemate or

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Speaker 2: instant eviction.

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Speaker 4: So when we were living together in Perth and when

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Speaker 4: I would occasionally, you know, on the rare chance I

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Speaker 4: might bring a woman home to our apartment in my

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Speaker 4: early days.

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Speaker 2: Every day that ended in why if you know what

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Speaker 2: I'm saying in Australia, when he had hair.

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Speaker 3: I'm going to let that one go.

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Speaker 4: But when that was going on, when you used to

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Speaker 4: fart into the vent which connected our rooms, so I

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Speaker 4: would smell that while we were intimate with each other.

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Speaker 3: Is that an instant eviction.

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Speaker 5: Or you tell me no, Well, you tell me definitely not.

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Speaker 5: That's funny.

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Speaker 3: Uh.

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Speaker 2: And I think, to be honest with the highlights, that

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Speaker 2: you should have been spending more time with your mate

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Speaker 2: who just moved to a new city, and just because

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Speaker 2: you were getting dates and he wasn't because going through

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Speaker 2: a chubby phase.

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Speaker 5: Maybe you should have just got around him a bit more.

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Speaker 3: So, No, something we need to dig up.

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Speaker 5: Okay, I'll read you some of the stuff that Brittany

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Speaker 5: used to it.

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Speaker 2: Okay, so Brittany had a cat but didn't have a

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Speaker 2: litter box, so the cat would just poo all over

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Speaker 2: the house talk or walk.

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Speaker 3: That's a talk.

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Speaker 4: Well, because if you got to give her a chance

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Speaker 4: to get a kit box to get it, what do

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Speaker 4: you call it?

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Speaker 3: A little kitty letter box, a litter boxletter box? That's

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Speaker 3: a letter boxes we put the mail in. What's it

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Speaker 3: called kitty litter?

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Speaker 2: Sorry, kitty litter. Yeah, it's on the saying letterbox. I'm

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Speaker 2: saying litter box. It doesn't that anyway.

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Speaker 5: Okay, So that's a talk. That's a talk. Next one

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Speaker 5: she gave someone, this is Brittany.

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Speaker 2: She she gave she gave a complete stranger.

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Speaker 5: Ye, a Brazilian wax on the shared coffee table?

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Speaker 3: Is that?

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Speaker 5: Is that a talk?

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Speaker 3: Complete stranger? How do you say?

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Speaker 4: Well, I'm probably more interested in how she makes you

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Speaker 4: get from I think, Hi.

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Speaker 5: I'm what's her name, Brittany?

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Speaker 3: Hi, I'm Brittany too. Do you mind if I wax you?

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Speaker 3: I think that's just impressive. I think that's not a

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Speaker 3: walk for mine. That's just how the hell did you

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Speaker 3: do that?

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Speaker 2: I think her side hustle was doing waxes. So she

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Speaker 2: was making talk.

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Speaker 5: I mean, you're talk, You're really you're not.

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Speaker 2: You're not evicting someone who was giving Brazilian waxes on

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Speaker 2: your coffee table.

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Speaker 3: No, she put it, she got a sheep down.

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Speaker 4: I mean, if it's a business, she'd probably go, look, mate,

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Speaker 4: if you're running the hustle in the house, that's fine,

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Speaker 4: but you know, just put a sheet down.

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Speaker 2: That's the talk as well, playing hell, it's a Brazilian

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Speaker 2: wax so it's a guy you guys?

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I don't think guys can get a Brazilllion wax.

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Speaker 3: No, hence why I said I think it's a good

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Speaker 3: can they?

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Speaker 5: That's a really good question.

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Speaker 3: No, you get a sack back and crack.

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Speaker 4: I think which is a which is a which is

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Speaker 4: an equivalent to a Brazilian suggested, I.

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Speaker 5: Don't know, Well, I think you're right.

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Speaker 3: Do you know what I mean?

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Speaker 4: No, I mean I think of it's a guy getting

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Speaker 4: a wax on the table to be different.

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Speaker 5: To exist. That's a bit sexist mine.

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Speaker 3: No, it's just if you know, yeah, I'll give it you. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: okaycause if you're sorry, just you neither your I girls.

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Speaker 4: But if you're waxing a girl, I mean all the

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Speaker 4: businesses you know, sort of tucked up there. You know,

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Speaker 4: it's not touching everyone, it's not touching the table. Well,

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Speaker 4: I'm sorry if you're lying on the back and you table.

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Speaker 4: But do you know do you know what I mean?

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Speaker 3: Antalyast? You know, like if you're need a wax.

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Speaker 5: It's all junior producer anily, we move on, I say,

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Speaker 5: we move on, move it along.

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Speaker 3: But it wouldn't have been near the table, you know.

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Speaker 2: I don't know to write a calls, so there's not

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Speaker 2: one people to call for if I anyone don't see

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Speaker 2: is our number? What housemate blunder for you is an

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Speaker 2: instant eviction? Wow, so you probably experienced this before, Like

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Speaker 2: what was the blunder so bad you stick to the

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Speaker 2: talk and was an instant eviction?

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Speaker 5: Like, how bad was the blunder?

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Speaker 4: Okay, give us a call, thirty one oh six five swilling,

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Speaker 4: what do you hope? You're having a wonderful drive home?

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Speaker 4: And at least we probably weren't there yet in our relationship.

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Speaker 4: I appreciate that I just needed a girl's opinion and

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Speaker 4: you were the only one in.

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Speaker 5: Sight not there with anyone.

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Speaker 4: No, thirty one oh six ' five have has a

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Speaker 4: housemate of it done something so grievously wrong that it

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Speaker 4: was grounds for you to immediately evict them?

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Speaker 3: I think it's impossible.

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Speaker 4: I don't think there's a there's an immediately evictible offense.

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Speaker 5: Let me throw a few more. These are just hypotheticals.

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Speaker 6: Yep.

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Speaker 2: I will go to calls in a second, But these

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Speaker 2: are as hypotheticals. What if your housemate was allergic to towels,

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Speaker 2: so after showering, they just drip water all through your

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Speaker 2: house and get everything wet to chat?

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Speaker 3: I mean that's a shocking condition. I mean if I

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Speaker 3: found that out about someone, I'd be like geez.

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Speaker 5: But if you have the chat, though, there's no like

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Speaker 5: how do you fix that?

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Speaker 3: We we'd work them out and get some paper towel.

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Speaker 5: You're an understanding guy.

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Speaker 4: Well, I mean if someone came to me is like

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Speaker 4: I'm allergic to towels, I'd be like, geez, that sucks.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's probably one of the best feelings in the world.

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Speaker 5: A towel yourself. How about this?

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Speaker 3: Somebody to kick him out of my house for it?

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Speaker 5: How about this? What are you I'm a savage? You

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Speaker 5: know what I'm.

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Speaker 3: Hear that?

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Speaker 2: What if every time you were in the kitchen and

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Speaker 2: they entered the room and saw you in the kitchen,

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Speaker 2: they said, what's.

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Speaker 5: Cooking good looking? Every time?

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Speaker 3: I love that piss off.

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Speaker 5: Every time they go what's cooking good looking?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I'd be like, oh, what's what's on your horse

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Speaker 4: hot sauce?

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Speaker 3: You know, something like that. But that'd be a good bit.

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Speaker 3: So every time they come in, what about if back

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Speaker 3: and cracking?

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Speaker 5: What about are you gonna do another ray?

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Speaker 3: What's on the fly? Stir fry? Nice?

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Speaker 2: What if what another have a very goo voye? Every

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Speaker 2: time they eat, they really loudly go.

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Speaker 3: Mmm mmmm loving my cooking.

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Speaker 5: You're ridiculous.

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Speaker 3: You'd really enjoy that, you know, in Japan.

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Speaker 4: It's actually customary to eat very loudly so that you

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Speaker 4: approve of the person's cooking.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, you don't cook for enough people.

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Speaker 5: I can't. It's not safe.

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Speaker 2: It's not safe anymore because I make people sick because

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Speaker 2: I just do it badly.

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Speaker 4: You nearly had an evictible offense from one of your

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Speaker 4: houses because you can bind the soup fry.

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Speaker 3: What was that? Sushi and stur fry? Sushi and stir fry.

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Speaker 5: I put sushi in the oven. Apparently that's not what

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Speaker 5: you do. Let's go to Charlie here.

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Speaker 2: I also did nacho's and dumplings. I called them numplings. Yes,

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Speaker 2: made a lot of people sick. Let's go to Charlie. Charlie,

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Speaker 2: this happened to your sister, so sorry. Was she the

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Speaker 2: one getting instantly evicted or did she instantly evict.

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Speaker 6: No, she should have instantly evicted her HOUSEMATEE.

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Speaker 3: What do they do?

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Speaker 6: I firstly love your show, Boysie. My sister came home

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Speaker 6: one time and found the entire house reeked of gas,

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Speaker 6: and the housemate had left the stove on, but left

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Speaker 6: the gas on the stove all day. Thought the I

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Speaker 6: thought the bills would have gone up, and then I

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Speaker 6: went to have a chat and he literally just packed

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Speaker 6: up and moved to Sydney. She finally got onto him

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Speaker 6: and he was just gone.

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Speaker 5: He actually wanted to blow her up.

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Speaker 3: Wow, he actually wanted to blow the joint up. That's extraordinary.

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Speaker 5: That is that is I was not expecting that.

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Speaker 3: Did Did you find out if he wanted to kill her?

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Speaker 6: I don't think.

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Speaker 4: I don't know, but wow, Yeah, I just fully left

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Speaker 4: it on all day and.

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Speaker 5: Trying to kill you?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, there isn't.

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Speaker 2: They tried to kill me when I was sleeping, probably

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Speaker 2: go to Yeah, I got to get rid of him. Look,

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Speaker 2: if you're trying to kill me, I can't live with you. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: that stress will imagine if your house mate was trying

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Speaker 2: to kill you and you knew. I need help paying

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Speaker 2: the bills though, So I need you here. That's a

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Speaker 2: TV show right down.

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Speaker 3: You just call the cops.

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Speaker 5: You need the rent, You need the rent. Let's go

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Speaker 5: to Matthew here. I think it's a sitcom. Matthew think

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Speaker 5: it is?

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Speaker 3: What just chuck it?

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Speaker 5: Just just let me write the pilot.

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Speaker 3: Let me write you look for a new house mate.

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Speaker 3: You'd call the cops and then you go back to

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Speaker 3: the well.

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Speaker 5: What if it was a real shortage and people weren't

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Speaker 5: moving around like in COVID. It's hard to find dystopian

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Speaker 5: future a lot of places we can take it.

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Speaker 2: Well, Matthew, Matthew, what did what did your housemate do

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Speaker 2: to you? There was an instant eviction.

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Speaker 7: I had some drinks with him and the partner at

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Speaker 7: the time the night before, woke up the next morning

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Speaker 7: and he'd done the dirty with her, and she was

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Speaker 7: still in his bed with him the next morning and

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Speaker 7: tell me nothing happened.

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Speaker 5: They said, nothing happened, and.

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Speaker 7: Caught her in bed with him, and you can get out,

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Speaker 7: And then they both walked out and tried to tell

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Speaker 7: me nothing happened that night, and it just so happened

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Speaker 7: as they ended up in the same bed with each other.

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Speaker 4: Ah, how did they justify it, though, Matthew, noting.

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Speaker 7: No, oh there was. There was lots of stories and

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Speaker 7: then all sorts of stuff, lots lots of drinking and stuff. Yeah, nothing,

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Speaker 7: nothing actually happened. It was just they ended up in naked.

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Speaker 3: Would naked as well? Writing on the wall?

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Speaker 7: Pretty hard to that one.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, No, I.

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Speaker 3: Wouldn't have bought that, that's for sure.

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Speaker 5: What he might have though, instant of I am gullible.

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Speaker 5: I am gullible.

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Speaker 4: Sarah's called on third and when I said, god, that's

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Speaker 4: tough for Maddie.

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Speaker 5: That's really but that's obviously instant of viction.

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Speaker 4: You found one of your housemates and it wasn't a housemates,

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Speaker 4: a guy after a party.

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Speaker 3: Nerd in your bed.

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Speaker 5: He was need in my bed another woman.

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Speaker 2: And he was somehow he put my dinner in between

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Speaker 2: his legs. I don't know, just between the sexy show

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Speaker 2: or he was.

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Speaker 3: She would have just pulled it.

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Speaker 2: Well, he was gyrating my dinner anyway, didn't wtch it

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Speaker 2: couldn't be bothered.

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Speaker 5: Let's go to Sarah here bring.

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Speaker 6: I had a flatmate and her boyfriend come down from

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Speaker 6: Byron and I confronted her on and she told.

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Speaker 3: Me to oh yeah, no Sarah as well.

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Speaker 5: I don't know.

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Speaker 3: I didn't even get to the bottom of the story.

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Speaker 3: What her house.

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Speaker 4: She just came down from and they go out and.

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Speaker 5: Couldn't like CROs.

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Speaker 3: Said that he snapped his ear. I mean it kills

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Speaker 3: the producers, guys. That's the lesson. You didn't hear it there,

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Speaker 3: but she did swear.

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Speaker 4: That's why the audio jumped a bit, and it kills

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Speaker 4: the producers out there.

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Speaker 3: They work hard to get your good stories on air.

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Speaker 2: And now poop poopen did only be frustrated because he

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Speaker 2: knows that she had a good story.

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Speaker 5: Can you just give it to us quickly?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? So she her her housemate gave these other two

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Speaker 1: people keys to the house. Sarah didn't know them very well,

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Speaker 1: so confronted her housematee. The housemate said that thing that

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Speaker 1: we can't say yes, and then so Sarah what she

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Speaker 1: did as revenge is moved all of the kitchen items, cutlery,

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Speaker 1: microwave frigid stuff into Sarah's room and put a lock

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Speaker 1: on the door so that only Sarah could use them

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Speaker 1: in her housemates couldn't.

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Speaker 3: Oh, that's a great story.

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Speaker 1: That's how you tell your story, Sarah.

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Speaker 5: Hear more of the boys on the Full Show podcast.

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Speaker 7: You know you want to