Speaker 1: Is it just me a podcast by a couple of images?
Speaker 2: All right? Now, I don't quite have a roadmap of
Speaker 2: how I want to talk about this or really know
Speaker 2: how to bring it in. And it's not often that
Speaker 2: I'm lost for words. I'm not lost for words. I'm
Speaker 2: just emotional. You probably have noticed on this show or
Speaker 2: even online or socials, I haven't been posting about my
Speaker 2: relationship much. I haven't been speaking about it at all.
Speaker 1: People have said, oh, I haven't heard Hayden's name mentioned
Speaker 1: in a while.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I've got I've got a few messages and they've
Speaker 2: been increasing in volume over the last few days and weeks.
Speaker 2: So I thought i'll talk about it. I will just
Speaker 2: say that Hayden and I have split up. We're no
Speaker 2: longer together, we've broken up, we've valeted our relationship, and
Speaker 2: I am got it. I'm really, really sad.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean there's been ups and downs for you.
Speaker 1: Would you agree? Because it is not news to us.
Speaker 2: Obviously about a month. It's been about four or five weeks.
Speaker 2: That's why I feel I have to talk about it,
Speaker 2: because it's my life at the moment, and it's happened,
Speaker 2: and it's real and it's reality.
Speaker 1: So and even though it's been going on in private
Speaker 1: for a few weeks, yeah, it doesn't make it any
Speaker 1: less sad. Now that you're a little bit further along
Speaker 1: the line at a point where you're ready to talk
Speaker 1: about it on the podcast.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I wouldn't even say that I'm ready, but I
Speaker 2: just have to. I mean, it's my life and I'm
Speaker 2: getting asked questions and it's the reality. And I just
Speaker 2: think it's so tough. When my job is to come
Speaker 2: out and be funny and be the entertainer, and I
Speaker 2: do it two daily radio shows, It's fucked And to
Speaker 2: put on this mask and perform has been one of
Speaker 2: the hardest things I've ever done. And I also want
Speaker 2: to preface this by saying I often hate talking about
Speaker 2: myself and my personal life in this regard because I
Speaker 2: hate any ounce of arrogance or any ounce of look
Speaker 2: look at me. To listen to my life, it's so important.
Speaker 1: I mean, that's what we've got this podcast for that
Speaker 1: complex must be very challenging. It's you hate talking about yourself,
Speaker 1: but we do it for at.
Speaker 2: Least an hour away. It's a bit like, oh, shut up,
Speaker 2: who cares? But it's my life.
Speaker 1: People want to know because we spoke a lot about
Speaker 1: the relationship when that was your situation that you were in,
Speaker 1: moving out of your parents' place for the first time,
Speaker 1: moving in with the partner, etcetera, etcetera. Either all things
Speaker 1: I've covered, this is just the next thing.
Speaker 2: It's just so it's just that's why I think it's
Speaker 2: so hard, because we were together for five years in October,
Speaker 2: and I will say it was my choice to end
Speaker 2: the relationship. Just I'm not going to go into the details, so.
Speaker 1: I don't need to throw a drink in anyone's face.
Speaker 2: It wasn't. I don't feel it's necessary. Okay, you know,
Speaker 2: I mean, I'm hurting, but I ultimately made the decision
Speaker 2: in the end, and it's just it's being in a
Speaker 2: relationship that you came out for. Like I was talking
Speaker 2: to you about this, trying to work out how I
Speaker 2: was going to articulate it. And sorry if I'm a
Speaker 2: bit scattered and all over the place, but this is
Speaker 2: just a true, live recounting of where I'm at. And
Speaker 2: I've never been through a breakup before, so there's no
Speaker 2: I don't have any sort of stick in the sand
Speaker 2: to go. That's how I should be reacting. But I
Speaker 2: have been thinking, Okay, well, who was I before I
Speaker 2: was in this relationship, because everyone's like, you'll be fine,
Speaker 2: You're Mitch cheery, you'd be great, you got a blue tick.
Speaker 1: You said that it was at the arrogance that you
Speaker 1: mentioned before.
Speaker 2: Correct, there it is, And I think, well, the person
Speaker 2: that I was before I was in this relationship was
Speaker 2: a twenty two year old, closeted kid who lived with
Speaker 2: his parents.
Speaker 1: Yeah. No, you can't go back to that.
Speaker 2: It's scary.
Speaker 1: That's not how it works in any breakup situation. I
Speaker 1: think you don't just go back to the person you
Speaker 1: were before.
Speaker 2: I know, but you sort of think, okay, well life
Speaker 2: was fine without them, But then you go back to
Speaker 2: when where life was without them. I was a different person.
Speaker 1: And it's five years. It's going to take a while
Speaker 1: to find the new normal and five informative years. Yeah,
Speaker 1: oh god, yeah, I mean, even though it's a sad situation,
Speaker 1: love Hayten, love you, it's not a good situation for
Speaker 1: anyone involved. I've already told you this. There's a very
Speaker 1: big part of me that's quite excited because you're excited
Speaker 1: because you've never lived life as an openly gay single man.
Speaker 2: No, I haven't.
Speaker 1: We Well, may you have a lot more relationship experience
Speaker 1: than me, but I've got a lot more experience being
Speaker 1: single than you. So now I've got wisdom to impart.
Speaker 2: I love it.
Speaker 1: If you'd told me this time last year that you
Speaker 1: would be the single Mitch and I wouldn't be I
Speaker 1: wouldn't have fucking believed you. But now that we're here,
Speaker 1: I'm like, great, the next chapter for you. It's still
Speaker 1: fragile at the moment, but eventually we'll be able to
Speaker 1: run all the segments I have in mind. Cheeries blind date, No,
Speaker 1: Cheery's speed dating, setting up, Cheery's hinge is the Cheeries
Speaker 1: one night stand? Will we good to go next week with?
Speaker 2: I need time. I need time. I don't want to
Speaker 2: look at another person for ten years. I mean I
Speaker 2: will get there. Of course I'll get there. Yeah, But
Speaker 2: at the moment, the light at the end of the
Speaker 2: tunnel is hazy. It's so much better than it was
Speaker 2: four or five weeks ago. Oh, I'm in chaotic.
Speaker 1: A few weeks ago you were crying to me on
Speaker 1: the phone, and then the week after that you were saying,
Speaker 1: let's go to Oxford Street. I want to go gay clubbing.
Speaker 1: I haven't been in fun five years, and I was like,
Speaker 1: fucking too easy. I'll make it up, and we did,
Speaker 1: and in the following week you were sad again. And
Speaker 1: then so it's like it'll be like that for a bit.
Speaker 1: I do imagine ups and down. Some days. You were
Speaker 1: seeing the pros more than the convolt.
Speaker 2: Definitely, and it's sort of you need to be out
Speaker 2: of a relationship and have the benefit of hindsight to
Speaker 2: really look at the way you want to be treated
Speaker 2: and the way that you need to be treated in
Speaker 2: a relationship. And I think that has helped me come
Speaker 2: to realize that it's the right decision exactly.
Speaker 1: I mean five years experience, you'll know going into the
Speaker 1: next relationship, not that that's going to happen anytime soon, relationship,
Speaker 1: don't think about that yet. Fucking when it happens, you'll
Speaker 1: be well better equipped relationship. You know what you will
Speaker 1: put up with and won't put up. Yes, I mean
Speaker 1: very different situation, but there are things that I put
Speaker 1: up with in the past that I would not put
Speaker 1: up with now with Sean. Not that he's ever shown
Speaker 1: any of those red flags, but you just become more
Speaker 1: aware of them.
Speaker 2: Yeah, with experience exactly, but anyone out there, and oh
Speaker 2: my god, can I just I have struggled so much
Speaker 2: to find content on queer breakups and queer relationships. There's nothing.
Speaker 2: There's nothing out there. It is actually barren. Every podcast
Speaker 2: you surge and you look for it is if the
Speaker 2: man cheats his goals to football with his mates and
Speaker 2: he works it out with his boys and the girls
Speaker 2: need a spa day and men are horrid wired to
Speaker 2: their cave men and they have red blood.
Speaker 1: It's like, shut the fuck up.
Speaker 2: But I'm all mean, real life story. So that's why
Speaker 2: I want to talk about it for a little like
Speaker 2: queer kids listening to this or queer adults, like, fuck,
Speaker 2: I'm twenty seven, I'm going through this for my first time.
Speaker 2: It is. It's tough, and I just want to say
Speaker 2: to anyone that maybe you're not going through it, but
Speaker 2: people listen to this podcast at many different times, they'll
Speaker 2: be listening in years to come. There is no right
Speaker 2: way to do it. And it's like a fucking it's
Speaker 2: like a death, like I've had to grieve the relationship.
Speaker 1: Well, it's like I said before, it is the seventh stages, Yes, totally.
Speaker 1: I can't remember all seven off the top of my hand.
Speaker 1: I want anger with the fun week.
Speaker 2: Oh I feel like I'm in that at the moment.
Speaker 1: Well here I am drinks. But this week I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: fuck man, I'm gonna have to come around there and
Speaker 1: hold your back.
Speaker 2: Ask me next week. I mean, Hayden, Spice girl stuff
Speaker 2: are still at home. So if you want to burn
Speaker 2: that to the ground, Oh.
Speaker 1: Yeah, right, you're in the dividing up the assets face
Speaker 1: my God gets to keep the details I gave you
Speaker 1: to that house form.
Speaker 2: The're fucking mind disgusting. You can take them. It's really hard, guys,
Speaker 2: actually really, and I'm making fun of it, but it's
Speaker 2: just these things are happening, and I have really high highs,
Speaker 2: really low lows. I know I've made the right decision
Speaker 2: and onwards and upwards. But I will say, if you
Speaker 2: want to send me a nice message, I love it.
Speaker 2: I love them so please because the nights are cold
Speaker 2: and they are lonely.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know it's easier for me to see the
Speaker 1: positives of you now being single, but hear me out,
Speaker 1: you fucking dove in the deep end. As soon as
Speaker 1: you came out of the closet, you were already in
Speaker 1: a relationship. When you came out to your parents, you
Speaker 1: were like, dude, I've got two things to tell you.
Speaker 1: I'm gay and I have a boyfriend. Like, you've skipped
Speaker 1: several milestones, and so now's a great time to catch
Speaker 1: up on the milestone living by yourself for the first time,
Speaker 1: being single, going on dates, et cetera, et cetera. These
Speaker 1: are all things that a form and even have informative
Speaker 1: for me, and now you get to experience them too.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm not excited about it at the moment.
Speaker 1: Eventually, eventually you'll look back and be like, Okay, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: Right now, I'm living in our giant three bedroom home
Speaker 2: and Hayden's living with his mum, and I'm trying to
Speaker 2: find a fucking property after you know, the head fuck
Speaker 2: that I've just gone through to find a property, understair storage,
Speaker 2: all that fucking shit, and now I've got to turn
Speaker 2: around to it all fucking again. I'll doing two shows,
Speaker 2: the radio shows, this fucking podcast, like.
Speaker 1: Say, put in the current place for a bit. That's
Speaker 1: a later problem. The house hunting one thing at a time.
Speaker 2: But if I'm a bit flat or sad in the
Speaker 2: next few weeks. I'm pushing through and I love doing
Speaker 2: this show and you've been a great friend to me
Speaker 2: over this time, so thank you for that. Of course,
Speaker 2: Off the c you have been great and I've got
Speaker 2: a great support nowork and I'm fine, but I'm sad
Speaker 2: and I'm flat. So I want to talk about it
Speaker 2: because I want to be able to lean into that.
Speaker 2: It's real human emotions. We've done this show for so
Speaker 2: fucking long. You guys listening, you idiots. I adore you
Speaker 2: and I want you to just get the real me
Speaker 2: and the show is to reflect where we're at our life.
Speaker 2: And it's funny. We I mean, you haven't had a
Speaker 2: breakup of this magnitude, you haven't been in a relationship
Speaker 2: this long. You're in your first relationship. This show has
Speaker 2: never had to go through this kind of mean work.
Speaker 2: We're fucking entertainers, like, we're funny people. We talk about
Speaker 2: funny stuff. So I don't know uncharted waters for us,
Speaker 2: but I guess we might be getting real and I'm
Speaker 2: happy to get real if you are.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, there's no rule that says we have
Speaker 1: to be funny. Every week. No, I mean you said
Speaker 1: last week, I'm sorry that I've been flat recently, and
Speaker 1: I did say, and I did mean it hasn't come across.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know.
Speaker 1: So now I guess you'll just have the fucking breakup
Speaker 1: card up your sleeve next time. Jenna and I are
Speaker 1: being a little bit too mean. We're teasing you too much.
Speaker 1: You're like, oh, I'm going to the breakup.
Speaker 2: I haven't pulled it, but I'm going to pull that.
Speaker 1: You can now it's out there. God, I hope there's
Speaker 1: no horny idiots listening that are going to start sliding
Speaker 1: here again.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean if there's in any year. I mean,
Speaker 2: you know they've wanted to ravish you for years now.
Speaker 2: The turns of tables have turned.
Speaker 1: I haven't actually gotten a lot of that. I did
Speaker 1: fuck one listener. They didn't tell me they were listener
Speaker 1: until after.
Speaker 2: Am I going to fuck a listener?
Speaker 1: I don't know. I should you keep it to you?
Speaker 2: Hey? If you want to be my first fuck? Hey, Siri,
Speaker 2: download Grinder.
Speaker 1: Oh god, I don't think if you're anything like me,
Speaker 1: which I feel that you are, you won't enjoy Grinder series.
Speaker 2: Getting it No delete Syria, I don't want that.
Speaker 1: I don't think you'd enjoy grinder. I could be wrong,
Speaker 1: but I just feel like, if I know you as
Speaker 1: well as I think I do, you probably wouldn't enjoy grinder.
Speaker 1: Get amongst hinge, Baby, We've been doing ad to it
Speaker 1: on this very show.
Speaker 2: I'm not going on the ass. Also, I know Heyden
Speaker 2: if you're listening to this, because I know he will listen.
Speaker 1: Oh for once, he never listens.
Speaker 2: Stop it. Yes, he didn't listen to the podcast, and
Speaker 2: who wouldn't.
Speaker 1: Oh, I do you reckon? He we'll be listening this week.
Speaker 2: Maybe I don't know, but I listen.
Speaker 1: I won't drink in your face.
Speaker 2: I did a load of washing and there were skid
Speaker 2: marks and all your undies. I had to use extra bleach,
Speaker 2: so you transferred me for half of the bleach.
Speaker 1: By the way, that might explain to our listeners why
Speaker 1: you're all of a sudden doing your own laundry.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, what was my excuse? What was the
Speaker 2: word I used?
Speaker 1: I can't remember.
Speaker 2: I said for circumstances outside my control.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we just started talking about the fact that you're
Speaker 1: now having to do your own laundry, and Jenna and
Speaker 1: I are looking at each other're like, oh fuck, we
Speaker 1: can't accidentally slip up and say because.
Speaker 2: You're it's been so hard to hide. But you know,
Speaker 2: I tried to work on it and I said, let's
Speaker 2: put the work in, and then things happened, and yeah,
Speaker 2: it's just we're here and we're not together anymore. And
Speaker 2: I love the five years we spent together. And that's true.
Speaker 1: I did.
Speaker 2: I don't remember. I don't regret a year. It was
Speaker 2: the most incredible five years. I'm going to get sad now,
Speaker 2: most incredible five years I've had.
Speaker 1: So listen that five years were also incredible for me,
Speaker 1: and I wasn't in a relationship. So everyone does everything
Speaker 1: in different orders, you know, Like we were just saying before,
Speaker 1: my sisters thirty has three kids, Jenna's thirty has no kids. Yeah,
Speaker 1: everyone moves at their own pace, and so this is
Speaker 1: just where you're at now.
Speaker 2: I know. I'm just such a fucking sad I hate
Speaker 2: I want to cry.
Speaker 1: Oh sweetie, give us the cattle.
Speaker 2: Oh you don't have to have what's wrong? Oh tissues things.
Speaker 2: I'm all good.
Speaker 1: By the way, has anyone ever told you that you
Speaker 1: don't have an ugly crying face at all. Really, you
Speaker 1: were just crying in front of me. You wipe the
Speaker 1: tissue over your eye? Gone? Really, if I've been crying,
Speaker 1: I look disgusting for hours a compliment.
Speaker 2: I'll take that in my stride.
Speaker 1: I was just looking at you, going what he was
Speaker 1: just crying? How did he look normal again? Oh? Completely
Speaker 1: back to normal?
Speaker 2: Sweet. I think that's the benefits of having a chubby face.
Speaker 1: No, it's all in the eyes. If I've been crying,
Speaker 1: it looks like I'm stoned for the next few hours.
Speaker 1: I can't go anywhere after crying. Everyone knows.
Speaker 2: So do I look good now? You?
Speaker 1: Literally, I'm not kidding. You wipe the tissue and then
Speaker 1: back to normal.
Speaker 2: You're know what my tactic is. I don't know where
Speaker 2: I learned this from, but I dab. I don't wipe
Speaker 2: because wiping sort of makes it all red.
Speaker 1: I don't fucking know, but I'll say my eyes go
Speaker 1: red like the lids go everything. You can tell when
Speaker 1: I've been crying. Oh, it's lovely.
Speaker 2: I crying face. I wonder if I've got a good
Speaker 2: cumface too. I'll feel that and send it to you
Speaker 2: so you can compare.
Speaker 1: Now, mate, I'll come and find out myself.
Speaker 2: All right, shall we end here and we can we can,
Speaker 2: we can come back in a week. Do you even
Speaker 2: have a segments?
Speaker 1: No, no, we can get out of here.
Speaker 2: Okay, that's what I mean. Let's go and then and
Speaker 2: we can check back in this week. I'm give me,
Speaker 2: give me seven days and I'll be all right.
Speaker 1: And he's very needy, He's made no secret of that.
Speaker 1: Send the lovely messages.
Speaker 2: I am a libra. Words of affirmation and acts of
Speaker 2: service in my love language. So if anyone wants to
Speaker 2: cook me a roast dinner and send me a lovely message,
Speaker 2: I'll take it.
Speaker 1: Never been through this, you know. I did think of that.
Speaker 1: I was like, maybe I should cook him something. And
Speaker 1: I was like, God, you get home so late at night.
Speaker 1: I'd have to be sitting there on your door set
Speaker 1: with a fucking up and try.
Speaker 2: Honest, I get home like nine thirty.
Speaker 1: These days, I can manage that. I can be that.
Speaker 2: My mum is my my, oh my god, I will
Speaker 2: just shout out. I've had I've got a brilliant support network,
Speaker 2: my family who were also heartbroken, because you know, he
Speaker 2: was like a son to my parents. I'm gonna cry again.
Speaker 1: That's okay, you can why I don't want.
Speaker 2: It though, And oh my god, I just pulled a
Speaker 2: tissue out of my my wrist.
Speaker 1: Like I'm fuck, you are getting on look at me.
Speaker 2: I've got a tissue in my wrist in my sleep.
Speaker 2: My family've been amazing. My mum has been dropping me
Speaker 2: meals every week and I've been seeing them and that's
Speaker 2: just He's have been great, and yeah, yeah, yeah, it's
Speaker 2: all good. It's all good.
Speaker 1: I'll be right, you know, like you said, you've got
Speaker 1: a great support network around you. So even though it's
Speaker 1: still shit, imagine going through something like that alone.
Speaker 2: And I am brandishing it from here on out, ladies.
Speaker 2: In generalising divorce, it's not a breakup. It's a divorce.
Speaker 1: I mean legally, give a de facto it's for years,
Speaker 1: so technically.
Speaker 2: The volume of shit that we have to deal with
Speaker 2: and the move out and the owning of assets, and
Speaker 2: it feels like a fucking divorce.
Speaker 1: Where are you at today? Like what do you have
Speaker 1: to do with today?
Speaker 2: We're currently dividing our assets, which we kind of done.
Speaker 2: We have an Excel spreadsheet, so horny.
Speaker 1: And god, I didn't feel like there was so much
Speaker 1: admint involved in a breakup.
Speaker 2: That excel leafy green color. It gets me, gets me
Speaker 2: fucking hard, and then we have to I'm trying to
Speaker 2: find a place to live alone. Leave it with me.
Speaker 2: I've already you know. I don't like being earnest and
Speaker 2: this was a lot. So thank you, Mitchell. You've been
Speaker 2: a great friend for yees.
Speaker 1: And I will continue to be thank you.
Speaker 2: Yeah it stops now, catch.
Speaker 1: You thrown idiots?
Speaker 2: Love you?
Speaker 1: Is It just Me? A podcast by a couple of mitches.