1 00:00:04,480 --> 00:00:06,680 Speaker 1: The Will and Woody Podcast. 2 00:00:07,680 --> 00:00:11,800 Speaker 2: Fresh from the Vaults at Fool's Paradise at the Adelaide 3 00:00:11,920 --> 00:00:15,880 Speaker 2: Fringe for our Tallest Tales competition ten thousand dollars for 4 00:00:15,960 --> 00:00:18,759 Speaker 2: someone with the best story, all thanks to Strongbow Woods. 5 00:00:18,840 --> 00:00:22,960 Speaker 3: We found it. We found Australia's greatest story. Was it 6 00:00:23,079 --> 00:00:25,599 Speaker 3: the story about a dead dog? Was it about a 7 00:00:25,640 --> 00:00:28,520 Speaker 3: woman who lost her pants at her funeral? Was it 8 00:00:28,640 --> 00:00:31,600 Speaker 3: the woman who was hitting the head with a boat 9 00:00:31,680 --> 00:00:34,560 Speaker 3: propeller and that saved her life? 10 00:00:34,960 --> 00:00:35,240 Speaker 2: Yes? 11 00:00:35,880 --> 00:00:38,320 Speaker 3: Yes, How the hell does that happen? Or was it 12 00:00:38,440 --> 00:00:41,640 Speaker 3: the woman with an incredibly sourcy uncle who died and 13 00:00:41,680 --> 00:00:44,080 Speaker 3: then all of these sexy secrets were revealed. 14 00:00:44,200 --> 00:00:46,239 Speaker 2: Got to say big, big shout out to everyone who 15 00:00:46,360 --> 00:00:47,840 Speaker 2: got on the stage. 16 00:00:47,440 --> 00:00:47,960 Speaker 3: At the Fringe. 17 00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:50,880 Speaker 2: You forget when you're there right like this has sold 18 00:00:50,920 --> 00:00:56,560 Speaker 2: out venue at a live comedy gig, like it is intimidating, 19 00:00:57,080 --> 00:00:58,960 Speaker 2: you know, for those mere mortals who don't know their 20 00:00:58,960 --> 00:01:01,240 Speaker 2: way around a microphone will for you and I like breathing, 21 00:01:01,280 --> 00:01:04,880 Speaker 2: but for a lot of people, that's a very scary, 22 00:01:05,240 --> 00:01:07,839 Speaker 2: very scary thing to do. So to Catherine, to Kelly, 23 00:01:07,920 --> 00:01:11,360 Speaker 2: to Steve and to Karen, thank you so much for 24 00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:13,120 Speaker 2: coming down and forgiving that a crack. 25 00:01:13,280 --> 00:01:13,560 Speaker 4: It was. 26 00:01:13,680 --> 00:01:15,280 Speaker 2: It was brilliant to see all you guys on stage 27 00:01:15,280 --> 00:01:17,360 Speaker 2: just yet rather actually came down to the fringe as. 28 00:01:17,280 --> 00:01:20,160 Speaker 3: Well, sold out and look, I mean why else. 29 00:01:20,200 --> 00:01:23,360 Speaker 2: I mean Stephen k Amos was also on the stage headlining, 30 00:01:23,400 --> 00:01:24,959 Speaker 2: and that's where we're going to kick things off. 31 00:01:25,080 --> 00:01:28,759 Speaker 3: He he had you in his sites will Yeah, unfairly 32 00:01:28,880 --> 00:01:31,480 Speaker 3: we I mean this this was kind of like it 33 00:01:31,480 --> 00:01:35,640 Speaker 3: was complimentary, complimentary in a way because he was admitting 34 00:01:35,720 --> 00:01:38,240 Speaker 3: to seeing some of our stuff on social media. Was 35 00:01:38,680 --> 00:01:41,680 Speaker 3: but unfortunately, through seeing our stuff on social media, he 36 00:01:41,840 --> 00:01:44,679 Speaker 3: used it as a vehicle to attack you. So if 37 00:01:44,720 --> 00:01:48,840 Speaker 3: you don't know Stephen Frye was once oh sorry, it 38 00:01:48,880 --> 00:01:50,720 Speaker 3: was on this radio show earlier this year, and he 39 00:01:50,840 --> 00:01:52,920 Speaker 3: is an absolute hero of yours. He is. 40 00:01:53,000 --> 00:01:54,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, we had a very special moment. I got very 41 00:01:54,600 --> 00:01:56,320 Speaker 2: emotional when you go surprised me with him. 42 00:01:56,720 --> 00:02:00,920 Speaker 1: I couldn't hear all that. Oh my gosh, I mean, 43 00:02:01,080 --> 00:02:03,840 Speaker 1: come on, for heaven's sake. 44 00:02:03,920 --> 00:02:06,400 Speaker 5: After saying that, I had to fly over as fast 45 00:02:06,400 --> 00:02:07,120 Speaker 5: as I could. 46 00:02:08,160 --> 00:02:10,520 Speaker 3: Guys, I should probably tell you Stephen fry is actually 47 00:02:10,520 --> 00:02:12,079 Speaker 3: in the studio now. He's been in the station in 48 00:02:12,120 --> 00:02:15,359 Speaker 3: the entire time. Huge titch up on Will. It was 49 00:02:15,400 --> 00:02:17,320 Speaker 3: a quick flight, but it was worth it. 50 00:02:17,400 --> 00:02:24,000 Speaker 6: Hello, thank you so much. 51 00:02:25,280 --> 00:02:28,160 Speaker 5: At your service at any time, day or night. 52 00:02:28,880 --> 00:02:31,040 Speaker 3: So nice to meet you, to meet you too. 53 00:02:31,160 --> 00:02:33,840 Speaker 7: Oh my god, well done everyone. 54 00:02:35,760 --> 00:02:38,800 Speaker 3: So so Stephen Frye brought you to tears. 55 00:02:38,919 --> 00:02:40,079 Speaker 2: He did, will you meet your Hero? 56 00:02:40,480 --> 00:02:41,960 Speaker 3: Pretty pretty rattling stuff. 57 00:02:42,600 --> 00:02:46,120 Speaker 2: And then Stephen Ks took the stage earlier. 58 00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:48,919 Speaker 3: He had to point this out. 59 00:02:49,840 --> 00:02:53,079 Speaker 6: I met Will and when he a number of times 60 00:02:53,120 --> 00:02:54,200 Speaker 6: over the years, and I. 61 00:02:54,160 --> 00:02:55,720 Speaker 1: Honestly thought that could laughed me. 62 00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:56,920 Speaker 8: I did. 63 00:02:57,320 --> 00:03:00,560 Speaker 6: I've been in studio an outside broadcast, and I thought 64 00:03:00,600 --> 00:03:03,919 Speaker 6: they loved me. That was up until I was in 65 00:03:03,960 --> 00:03:07,239 Speaker 6: London sort of middle of last year and I saw 66 00:03:08,520 --> 00:03:09,320 Speaker 6: but another. 67 00:03:09,080 --> 00:03:14,760 Speaker 1: Stephen appeared on this show. There is actually he got 68 00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:15,280 Speaker 1: from Will. 69 00:03:16,320 --> 00:03:17,720 Speaker 6: Really pissed off. 70 00:03:21,040 --> 00:03:22,000 Speaker 3: Fry Is. 71 00:03:22,120 --> 00:03:25,240 Speaker 1: Will's the reason Will does what he does. 72 00:03:27,800 --> 00:03:33,440 Speaker 6: I've been in that set with these boys, none of them. 73 00:03:33,480 --> 00:03:35,840 Speaker 5: So you owe me, you owe me. 74 00:03:37,440 --> 00:03:40,560 Speaker 3: Stephen k Amos, who we were so lucky that he 75 00:03:40,640 --> 00:03:44,600 Speaker 3: came down and he told us the story about when 76 00:03:44,760 --> 00:03:48,280 Speaker 3: he met the queen, and it really got the crowd warm. 77 00:03:48,680 --> 00:03:51,800 Speaker 2: Just before we play Stephen's story, I should probably mention 78 00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:55,840 Speaker 2: Stephen is British, but both his parents are Nigerian, and 79 00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:58,480 Speaker 2: that that really does matter when you have a listen 80 00:03:58,560 --> 00:04:00,600 Speaker 2: to this answer to a. 81 00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:03,920 Speaker 6: Show, a show to meet the actual queen, God rest 82 00:04:03,960 --> 00:04:06,120 Speaker 6: her soul. And I said, my kind of comedy will 83 00:04:06,120 --> 00:04:09,000 Speaker 6: at work. They said you'll be fine, and they said 84 00:04:09,080 --> 00:04:12,160 Speaker 6: you'll meet the queen afterwards. I said really. They said yes. However, 85 00:04:12,200 --> 00:04:14,880 Speaker 6: when you meet the queen there are certain protocol And 86 00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:17,159 Speaker 6: I said, what is the protocol? They said, when you 87 00:04:17,200 --> 00:04:19,560 Speaker 6: meet the queen, don't look her in the eye, speak 88 00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:20,960 Speaker 6: only she speaks to you. 89 00:04:21,240 --> 00:04:24,280 Speaker 1: And above all, you have to bow. And I was indiged. 90 00:04:24,360 --> 00:04:27,520 Speaker 2: I was like, what be bow for? 91 00:04:27,720 --> 00:04:29,000 Speaker 1: Never leave it giving you money. 92 00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:30,039 Speaker 2: I'm not hen. 93 00:04:30,120 --> 00:04:34,000 Speaker 6: No, in my eyes were all equal. I'm not going 94 00:04:34,080 --> 00:04:36,840 Speaker 6: to bow for anybody, ad laid. I was going to 95 00:04:36,920 --> 00:04:37,880 Speaker 6: stand my ground. 96 00:04:38,440 --> 00:04:39,279 Speaker 1: I finished the show. 97 00:04:39,560 --> 00:04:41,640 Speaker 6: I'm on the line up on the stage with all 98 00:04:41,680 --> 00:04:42,560 Speaker 6: the other performers. 99 00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:43,960 Speaker 1: Folks, I see the queen. 100 00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:46,120 Speaker 6: As soon as you gets in front of me, my 101 00:04:46,320 --> 00:04:48,640 Speaker 6: knees went. I bowed like a bitch. 102 00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:58,880 Speaker 5: Thank you for everything, thank you for saving my paper. 103 00:05:04,240 --> 00:05:06,680 Speaker 5: I was this close to liking the back ever. 104 00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:06,960 Speaker 8: Heard me. 105 00:05:08,880 --> 00:05:10,360 Speaker 1: And putting it on an envelope. 106 00:05:15,040 --> 00:05:17,720 Speaker 6: And it was at that same lineup show for the 107 00:05:17,800 --> 00:05:19,960 Speaker 6: Queen that I met Prince Harry for the first time. 108 00:05:20,279 --> 00:05:23,120 Speaker 6: This is the days before Meghan and in the lineup 109 00:05:23,200 --> 00:05:25,320 Speaker 6: he comes over to me and he said, oh, oh 110 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:29,200 Speaker 6: the comedian, most amusing, but tell me you don't sound 111 00:05:29,360 --> 00:05:30,359 Speaker 6: like a black chap. 112 00:05:32,440 --> 00:05:33,040 Speaker 2: And all right. 113 00:05:33,760 --> 00:05:40,840 Speaker 1: In my head, I was like, what's our part? 114 00:05:40,920 --> 00:05:41,560 Speaker 8: A found. 115 00:05:45,360 --> 00:05:48,760 Speaker 4: That was in my head, but obviously, being very British, 116 00:05:48,880 --> 00:05:50,640 Speaker 4: what came out of my mouth was well, I think 117 00:05:50,640 --> 00:05:56,160 Speaker 4: it was so much say or so, whereas with hindsight, 118 00:05:56,240 --> 00:05:58,440 Speaker 4: what I should have said was you don't quite you 119 00:05:58,480 --> 00:05:59,400 Speaker 4: look like your father. 120 00:05:59,520 --> 00:05:59,760 Speaker 6: Prince. 121 00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:08,520 Speaker 2: He's wild, he's naughty. He told a great story there. 122 00:06:08,640 --> 00:06:10,760 Speaker 2: I should mention we just tuning in. Yes, as I 123 00:06:10,800 --> 00:06:13,160 Speaker 2: said before, he is British, but both his parents are Nigerian, 124 00:06:13,160 --> 00:06:14,280 Speaker 2: and I hope that does put a lot of those 125 00:06:14,360 --> 00:06:15,839 Speaker 2: gags into context. 126 00:06:16,760 --> 00:06:21,320 Speaker 3: But look, we've got more from the Fringe right up. 127 00:06:21,320 --> 00:06:24,080 Speaker 2: Next, as we get into our four best stories from 128 00:06:24,120 --> 00:06:25,840 Speaker 2: our Tallest Tales competition, one of them is going to 129 00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:27,640 Speaker 2: take home ten grands and I should say I mentioned 130 00:06:27,680 --> 00:06:30,559 Speaker 2: this before to Captain poop Ben's our EP the story 131 00:06:30,640 --> 00:06:34,080 Speaker 2: that wins taps into one of the greatest conspiracies in 132 00:06:34,080 --> 00:06:46,720 Speaker 2: the last twenty years. Fresh from Fools Paradise at the 133 00:06:46,760 --> 00:06:50,200 Speaker 2: Adelaide Fringe woods for our Tallest Tales competition. Four great 134 00:06:50,240 --> 00:06:52,440 Speaker 2: stories over the course of this show. One of them 135 00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:54,880 Speaker 2: wins ten thousand dollars. All of these guys on stage, 136 00:06:54,960 --> 00:06:56,840 Speaker 2: big shout out to all of our storytellers. It was 137 00:06:56,880 --> 00:06:59,839 Speaker 2: a packed crown at a hell of an event. 138 00:07:00,200 --> 00:07:01,680 Speaker 3: Great crowd, wasn't it very right? 139 00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:02,159 Speaker 5: Crowd? 140 00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:05,320 Speaker 3: Energetic crowd. I remember it's the crowd that votes for 141 00:07:05,560 --> 00:07:09,320 Speaker 3: the best story, and besides, who wins the ten thousand dollars. 142 00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:13,000 Speaker 3: That's right. So without further ado, let's crack into story 143 00:07:13,320 --> 00:07:13,840 Speaker 3: number one. 144 00:07:14,240 --> 00:07:18,160 Speaker 8: This is Catherine, something horrible that happened to you that 145 00:07:18,320 --> 00:07:20,760 Speaker 8: ended up being really good. Me backpacking back in the 146 00:07:20,840 --> 00:07:24,000 Speaker 8: eighties and I was in Thailand, and I decided before 147 00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:26,720 Speaker 8: I went home, i'd go scuba diving. Not many people 148 00:07:27,040 --> 00:07:30,320 Speaker 8: had their paddy license. I was partnered with this South 149 00:07:30,480 --> 00:07:32,080 Speaker 8: Londoner lad called Dave. 150 00:07:32,440 --> 00:07:34,200 Speaker 1: Anyway, as we. 151 00:07:34,280 --> 00:07:38,200 Speaker 8: Went down about five meters, I started to realize that 152 00:07:38,440 --> 00:07:41,560 Speaker 8: something was wrong. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't get any 153 00:07:41,680 --> 00:07:45,160 Speaker 8: air out. I just could not breathe. And I'm saying 154 00:07:45,240 --> 00:07:47,920 Speaker 8: to my buddy, do you have to signal to your partner, 155 00:07:48,040 --> 00:07:49,800 Speaker 8: your buddy that you're in trouble. 156 00:07:49,880 --> 00:07:52,680 Speaker 1: So I'm saying, Dave, I mean trouble. I have to 157 00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:58,120 Speaker 1: go up, and he's going yeah, like this to. 158 00:07:58,200 --> 00:08:00,200 Speaker 8: Me, and I'm like no, no, no, no, no, me, 159 00:08:00,640 --> 00:08:01,560 Speaker 8: I'm in trouble. 160 00:08:01,720 --> 00:08:02,800 Speaker 2: I have to go up. 161 00:08:03,280 --> 00:08:07,000 Speaker 8: And he still didn't get it, and he's just like whatever, zoo, 162 00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:09,400 Speaker 8: And so I thought, I'm not going to be able 163 00:08:09,440 --> 00:08:11,600 Speaker 8: to buddy breathe with him. I just have to push 164 00:08:11,720 --> 00:08:15,160 Speaker 8: him forward, tell him to go to these people that 165 00:08:15,280 --> 00:08:18,800 Speaker 8: were ahead. And I go to the surface and as 166 00:08:18,840 --> 00:08:22,880 Speaker 8: I'm looking up and ascending, I see boats going everywhere. 167 00:08:23,520 --> 00:08:25,800 Speaker 8: How am I going to get up here without getting 168 00:08:26,040 --> 00:08:28,680 Speaker 8: hit by a boat? And as soon as I said that, 169 00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:31,800 Speaker 8: I got collected by boat in the back of my head. 170 00:08:32,040 --> 00:08:36,080 Speaker 8: The boat came smashing from behind and I was sort 171 00:08:36,080 --> 00:08:41,000 Speaker 8: of knocked and I could see stars, and basically I 172 00:08:41,080 --> 00:08:43,520 Speaker 8: could feel the boat going over the top of me. 173 00:08:43,679 --> 00:08:45,959 Speaker 8: Bang bang bang bang over the top, and I was 174 00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:50,960 Speaker 8: going the propeller, the propeller, and just at that moment, 175 00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:54,360 Speaker 8: my hair was like as I'm in water. My hair 176 00:08:54,400 --> 00:08:56,959 Speaker 8: got caught with the propeller, and I was swished around 177 00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:59,280 Speaker 8: and switched around, and switched around and switched around, cut 178 00:08:59,320 --> 00:09:02,160 Speaker 8: cut cut, cut cuts, choptop top, top, top everywhere, and 179 00:09:02,320 --> 00:09:06,719 Speaker 8: then the tank stopped the propeller. So I'm basically in 180 00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:12,360 Speaker 8: open water, blood everywhere. I have no idea how bad 181 00:09:12,400 --> 00:09:15,240 Speaker 8: I'm hit, but my head hurt like hell, and so 182 00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:17,000 Speaker 8: I knew I had to get back on the boat. 183 00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:20,600 Speaker 8: I knew I had to get to shore. I knew 184 00:09:20,640 --> 00:09:23,839 Speaker 8: I needed some attendance, so got them to get me 185 00:09:23,920 --> 00:09:26,680 Speaker 8: on the boat and I just demanded that guy take me. 186 00:09:26,720 --> 00:09:28,559 Speaker 1: To shore, bandaged up. 187 00:09:28,760 --> 00:09:32,360 Speaker 8: But fortunately for me is I was due to catch 188 00:09:32,360 --> 00:09:35,960 Speaker 8: a flight home back to Bangkok and then back to Australia, 189 00:09:36,600 --> 00:09:39,760 Speaker 8: and because I had an open head wound, I was 190 00:09:40,240 --> 00:09:44,679 Speaker 8: unable to fly and that flight crashed and there were 191 00:09:44,760 --> 00:09:50,079 Speaker 8: no survivors. So thank god I got hit by a boat. 192 00:09:50,240 --> 00:09:52,000 Speaker 1: And that's my good forty story. 193 00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:55,960 Speaker 3: What a yarn. 194 00:09:56,400 --> 00:09:59,760 Speaker 2: Unbelievable, really, And I mentioned earlier that taps into one 195 00:09:59,760 --> 00:10:02,760 Speaker 2: of the conspiracy theories of the last twenty years. I 196 00:10:02,960 --> 00:10:05,800 Speaker 2: think the flight that she missed was MH three seventy. 197 00:10:06,400 --> 00:10:08,640 Speaker 3: Yeah, And the interesting thing about that was that that 198 00:10:09,120 --> 00:10:10,840 Speaker 3: plane wreckage has never been found. 199 00:10:10,920 --> 00:10:13,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, great prize, ten thousand dollars for a 200 00:10:13,160 --> 00:10:14,280 Speaker 2: good yarn. Not bad. 201 00:10:14,559 --> 00:10:16,719 Speaker 3: And this one, I mean, I particularly like this one 202 00:10:16,840 --> 00:10:20,360 Speaker 3: because I mean, it really shames a person who is 203 00:10:20,440 --> 00:10:23,240 Speaker 3: no longer with us. I'm not going to say anymore, 204 00:10:23,320 --> 00:10:26,679 Speaker 3: but here is Karen ruining the name of her family. 205 00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:29,920 Speaker 1: So I want to tell you a story about my uncle. 206 00:10:30,120 --> 00:10:32,559 Speaker 7: He was a really upstanding guy, very very well respected 207 00:10:32,600 --> 00:10:33,280 Speaker 7: by the community. 208 00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:35,160 Speaker 1: You know, you walked down the street, every wanted to 209 00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:38,600 Speaker 1: be saying hello. He everyone loved him and that was lovely. 210 00:10:39,280 --> 00:10:41,720 Speaker 1: So few years ago he passed away. That's okay. 211 00:10:41,840 --> 00:10:44,400 Speaker 7: We all had that happen, and we had the job 212 00:10:44,480 --> 00:10:47,720 Speaker 7: of going through his personal belongings. Now that was an 213 00:10:47,760 --> 00:10:50,880 Speaker 7: interesting process. So when we got there to this house, 214 00:10:50,920 --> 00:10:51,840 Speaker 7: we're going through everything. 215 00:10:52,040 --> 00:10:54,280 Speaker 1: I should say, my uncle he was a military man, 216 00:10:54,520 --> 00:10:58,920 Speaker 1: very staunchly military. Why was I going through his bookshelf? 217 00:10:59,360 --> 00:11:01,079 Speaker 1: Now he read to worse when I was little. But 218 00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:03,320 Speaker 1: this is one that he actually didn't grieve to us, 219 00:11:03,760 --> 00:11:06,960 Speaker 1: and I'm disappointed. What shall I put in a hole? 220 00:11:10,360 --> 00:11:12,680 Speaker 1: Then we got to his record collection at the front. 221 00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:17,080 Speaker 7: Yeah, you've got Doris Day, fra Lynn, all the classics, 222 00:11:17,640 --> 00:11:20,440 Speaker 7: London Symphony Orchestra, and then we get. 223 00:11:20,360 --> 00:11:25,200 Speaker 1: To let's all join in a singalong for swinger parties, 224 00:11:29,559 --> 00:11:32,559 Speaker 1: the Art of Love and the Karma Sutra. 225 00:11:34,760 --> 00:11:42,800 Speaker 9: Lovely, and then my favorite twenty immoral classics, featuring such 226 00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:47,880 Speaker 9: hits as Real Grand Rod and The Sexual Life of 227 00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:48,480 Speaker 9: the Camel. 228 00:11:51,520 --> 00:11:53,240 Speaker 1: Not sure how we look at that, So we get 229 00:11:53,280 --> 00:11:54,959 Speaker 1: to his draws. We're going to the draws. At the 230 00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:58,280 Speaker 1: inside his drawers, there's a lot of lists and things. 231 00:11:58,720 --> 00:11:59,400 Speaker 1: One of those. 232 00:11:59,280 --> 00:12:05,440 Speaker 10: Lists included his porn list. Now, curiously, next to every 233 00:12:05,520 --> 00:12:08,320 Speaker 10: list is a name, a male name. 234 00:12:09,040 --> 00:12:11,679 Speaker 1: Come this week. I read my parents in the me 235 00:12:11,880 --> 00:12:13,480 Speaker 1: beginning of the week, and I say, look, I'm thinking 236 00:12:13,559 --> 00:12:17,000 Speaker 1: of applying for Will and what he's tallest tales? I think, 237 00:12:17,080 --> 00:12:18,920 Speaker 1: you know, Uncle Phil, he had a great life and 238 00:12:19,160 --> 00:12:22,400 Speaker 1: he's very funny. Let's put this out there. My mum 239 00:12:22,520 --> 00:12:25,000 Speaker 1: goes white, and so why not her name's a good guy. 240 00:12:25,040 --> 00:12:27,319 Speaker 1: He's just a dirty old cloture she is. 241 00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:28,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, there's a. 242 00:12:28,760 --> 00:12:31,280 Speaker 1: Little more to it than that. So that list of 243 00:12:31,440 --> 00:12:36,280 Speaker 1: men was the local men, my uncle, as it turns out, 244 00:12:36,640 --> 00:12:36,960 Speaker 1: who was. 245 00:12:37,040 --> 00:12:40,959 Speaker 7: Running this family owned business loyally loved by the folks 246 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:41,600 Speaker 7: around town. 247 00:12:42,160 --> 00:12:46,560 Speaker 9: Was actually providing porn to all of the gentlemen in town. 248 00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:48,839 Speaker 1: And I had absolutely no idea as a child, no 249 00:12:48,960 --> 00:12:52,520 Speaker 1: idea whatsoever. So he was the local porn dealer before 250 00:12:53,480 --> 00:12:56,480 Speaker 1: only fans. There was my uncle out the back of 251 00:12:56,520 --> 00:13:01,120 Speaker 1: the family business delivering porn to the gentleman. Now, I 252 00:13:02,400 --> 00:13:03,120 Speaker 1: thought nothing of it. 253 00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:03,800 Speaker 6: When we got to his. 254 00:13:03,920 --> 00:13:06,959 Speaker 1: General had his general. There's a lot of men, a 255 00:13:07,080 --> 00:13:09,480 Speaker 1: lot of men, a lot of men. 256 00:13:10,679 --> 00:13:13,480 Speaker 10: I dedicate to my performance night too, mine uncle, who 257 00:13:13,520 --> 00:13:16,559 Speaker 10: I love very, very dearly, who first serviced his country 258 00:13:17,920 --> 00:13:20,120 Speaker 10: and then service his local community. 259 00:13:23,200 --> 00:13:25,920 Speaker 2: Strange thing to be on stage. It's a great story, 260 00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:27,240 Speaker 2: I mean, to everyone's delight. 261 00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:29,599 Speaker 3: If it wasn't obvious, she had the props too, so 262 00:13:29,720 --> 00:13:33,680 Speaker 3: this is legit. There was sexy books, the saucy records. 263 00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:36,800 Speaker 2: I think she was kind of embarrassed afterwards, like she 264 00:13:36,880 --> 00:13:38,680 Speaker 2: kind of cackled along a little bit in her seat. 265 00:13:38,720 --> 00:13:40,839 Speaker 2: But then we bumped into her at the hotel in 266 00:13:40,880 --> 00:13:43,080 Speaker 2: the lobby at the m suites where we were put up, 267 00:13:43,120 --> 00:13:45,280 Speaker 2: and she said that she was just going to head 268 00:13:45,320 --> 00:13:45,920 Speaker 2: off to her room. 269 00:13:45,880 --> 00:13:47,920 Speaker 3: To finish the bottle of wine she'd opened. And I 270 00:13:48,080 --> 00:13:50,959 Speaker 3: swear I could hear the audio of one of those 271 00:13:51,040 --> 00:14:00,480 Speaker 3: Swingers records. Really, you haven't heard the fourth. It's a 272 00:14:00,559 --> 00:14:05,280 Speaker 3: woman called Kelly who became a little bit unpopular at 273 00:14:05,280 --> 00:14:05,800 Speaker 3: a funeral. 274 00:14:07,040 --> 00:14:08,839 Speaker 11: All right, So I had a really good friend and 275 00:14:09,040 --> 00:14:12,439 Speaker 11: her father passed about a year ago. I'm about to 276 00:14:12,559 --> 00:14:17,360 Speaker 11: go and attend the most sad and important day of 277 00:14:17,520 --> 00:14:21,800 Speaker 11: my friend and her family's life. This day got my 278 00:14:21,960 --> 00:14:24,960 Speaker 11: parents hit on feeling good. But times against me, guys. 279 00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:28,000 Speaker 11: I'm running late, like I normally do. I get their 280 00:14:28,280 --> 00:14:32,280 Speaker 11: services outside on the lawn. It's been raining a few 281 00:14:32,360 --> 00:14:33,840 Speaker 11: days prior, it's actually raining. 282 00:14:33,720 --> 00:14:34,120 Speaker 1: On the day. 283 00:14:34,720 --> 00:14:37,000 Speaker 11: So I get out and I'm like, I'm legging it. 284 00:14:37,560 --> 00:14:39,880 Speaker 11: So I'm not running down in between these grades. I'm 285 00:14:39,920 --> 00:14:40,680 Speaker 11: running across them. 286 00:14:40,800 --> 00:14:41,640 Speaker 1: That's it I'm going. 287 00:14:42,280 --> 00:14:45,120 Speaker 11: So I start running out. I mean I'm running like 288 00:14:45,280 --> 00:14:48,440 Speaker 11: you're saying, bolt running one hundred meters at the Olympic side. 289 00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:49,760 Speaker 11: I'm punching it. 290 00:14:50,720 --> 00:14:52,080 Speaker 1: So I'm just about there. 291 00:14:52,280 --> 00:14:55,280 Speaker 11: I'm a few steps away from my goal, and then 292 00:14:55,280 --> 00:14:57,840 Speaker 11: all of a sudden, keep your mind has been raining. 293 00:14:58,560 --> 00:15:01,320 Speaker 11: All of a sudden, I get to like three feet 294 00:15:02,080 --> 00:15:05,880 Speaker 11: away from where I'm supposed to be, and the next minute, 295 00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:07,840 Speaker 11: the ground's gone from under me. 296 00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:09,640 Speaker 1: I'm actually upset here. 297 00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:12,040 Speaker 3: In a grave. 298 00:15:14,280 --> 00:15:15,080 Speaker 1: Full of MUDs. 299 00:15:15,880 --> 00:15:20,000 Speaker 11: My friend's mother is sobbing into her hands. My friend 300 00:15:20,040 --> 00:15:24,680 Speaker 11: she's looking at me, going what's the fire and shaking 301 00:15:24,720 --> 00:15:27,800 Speaker 11: her head on stream employees, come on, just step me 302 00:15:27,880 --> 00:15:30,320 Speaker 11: out of here. Someone help me. So I've got the 303 00:15:30,400 --> 00:15:32,800 Speaker 11: funeral director comes over one side, and then I've got 304 00:15:32,840 --> 00:15:34,720 Speaker 11: someone else on the other side, and they're like pulling 305 00:15:34,800 --> 00:15:39,760 Speaker 11: me up. I looked down and my underwear pants are 306 00:15:39,760 --> 00:15:46,480 Speaker 11: around ankle. I've got one shoe listen, and I'm like, 307 00:15:46,920 --> 00:15:48,200 Speaker 11: everything's out there. 308 00:15:49,280 --> 00:15:51,040 Speaker 1: There ain't nothing else I can share. 309 00:15:51,440 --> 00:15:54,960 Speaker 3: It's there, but you don't what. 310 00:15:55,640 --> 00:15:59,000 Speaker 11: I pulled my pants up and I went and sat 311 00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:02,000 Speaker 11: on that chair that wasn't going to hear the bear 312 00:16:02,160 --> 00:16:04,000 Speaker 11: of me, and I fell on that chair all the 313 00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:08,000 Speaker 11: way through that service. Get those frumpy looks, listeners to 314 00:16:08,080 --> 00:16:10,160 Speaker 11: those people gigging and go and look at that idiot 315 00:16:10,240 --> 00:16:14,400 Speaker 11: sitting on that chair, and I was like, you know what, 316 00:16:15,280 --> 00:16:17,200 Speaker 11: I'm so sorry. Went up to the mother and that 317 00:16:17,320 --> 00:16:19,840 Speaker 11: she was like no, not having a bar of it. 318 00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:22,640 Speaker 11: My friend was like turned it back. 319 00:16:23,400 --> 00:16:24,280 Speaker 3: So did this day? 320 00:16:25,200 --> 00:16:28,520 Speaker 11: I texted them trying to apologize of my friend. 321 00:16:28,920 --> 00:16:32,520 Speaker 1: I get up too soon. Yeah, and then you go 322 00:16:32,680 --> 00:16:34,720 Speaker 1: to a wake and everyone. 323 00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:36,880 Speaker 11: And await, guys, is supposed to be talking about. 324 00:16:37,160 --> 00:16:40,240 Speaker 1: You know, the good times with this person and everything 325 00:16:40,360 --> 00:16:40,520 Speaker 1: like that. 326 00:16:41,280 --> 00:16:42,800 Speaker 2: No, it was about the meddle with. 327 00:16:42,840 --> 00:16:45,560 Speaker 11: The fellow in the grave, rocked her trousers and had 328 00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:46,320 Speaker 11: one shoe on. 329 00:16:53,920 --> 00:16:57,080 Speaker 3: What you had Karen who told the story about her 330 00:16:57,800 --> 00:17:00,800 Speaker 3: her uncle who after he passed away, she found out 331 00:17:00,840 --> 00:17:04,080 Speaker 3: that he was providing porn to the entire town, which 332 00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:07,360 Speaker 3: led to every male in the town being very emotional 333 00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:12,440 Speaker 3: at his funeral. We had Catherine who was run over 334 00:17:12,720 --> 00:17:15,719 Speaker 3: by a speed boat. Then because she was run over 335 00:17:15,800 --> 00:17:16,120 Speaker 3: by us. 336 00:17:16,119 --> 00:17:18,720 Speaker 2: Court boat, propeller stripped from her head. 337 00:17:18,800 --> 00:17:22,040 Speaker 3: We saw the scars, We saw the scars, but because 338 00:17:22,080 --> 00:17:25,040 Speaker 3: she was run over by a boat, she missed her flight. Yes, 339 00:17:25,400 --> 00:17:28,399 Speaker 3: that flight went down, so been hit by a boat 340 00:17:28,520 --> 00:17:30,840 Speaker 3: saved her life, yes, and then we went down. That 341 00:17:31,040 --> 00:17:35,360 Speaker 3: is jumble incredible. We had Steve who had a dead 342 00:17:35,440 --> 00:17:39,399 Speaker 3: dog in a case stolen from him. Again, not important thing, 343 00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:41,680 Speaker 3: but we do think he just found that story online, 344 00:17:42,400 --> 00:17:45,600 Speaker 3: so maybe he was just retelling that. And then we 345 00:17:45,800 --> 00:17:48,760 Speaker 3: had Kelly who fell in a grave when she was 346 00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:51,280 Speaker 3: running to a funeral and when she was pulled out, 347 00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:54,440 Speaker 3: she lost her pants and then did the entire funeral pantless. 348 00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:59,680 Speaker 3: So great story, all great stories, all worthy winners, but 349 00:17:59,760 --> 00:18:02,600 Speaker 3: there it can only be one. The crowd voted, and 350 00:18:02,760 --> 00:18:06,800 Speaker 3: this will was the moment that you announced the winner. 351 00:18:09,320 --> 00:18:21,480 Speaker 2: Of willing Wood is Tassursive Peace. So the truly remarkable, 352 00:18:22,960 --> 00:18:28,600 Speaker 2: inconceivable story of Katherine on a holiday in Thailand getting 353 00:18:28,640 --> 00:18:32,640 Speaker 2: caught under a boat, nearly dying after she gets caught 354 00:18:32,720 --> 00:18:36,680 Speaker 2: in the boat's propeller, and then subsequently missing her flight 355 00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:41,359 Speaker 2: which goes down and certainly would have killed her, wins 356 00:18:41,440 --> 00:18:44,200 Speaker 2: the competition. Get rid of any sort of humor that 357 00:18:44,440 --> 00:18:47,159 Speaker 2: is just a jatz cracker of a yarn. You're not 358 00:18:47,200 --> 00:18:49,760 Speaker 2: going to get much better than that. And Katherine joins 359 00:18:49,840 --> 00:18:54,240 Speaker 2: us right now and well and what each is back? Katherine, 360 00:18:54,840 --> 00:18:56,480 Speaker 2: congratulations mate. 361 00:18:58,040 --> 00:18:59,160 Speaker 8: Thank you so much. 362 00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:02,120 Speaker 3: How are you going to spend the money? Katherine? 363 00:19:03,680 --> 00:19:05,840 Speaker 8: I think I'm going to take my voice to Thailand 364 00:19:05,920 --> 00:19:08,200 Speaker 8: and get them to go scuba diving my children. 365 00:19:08,400 --> 00:19:11,800 Speaker 3: Yeah. Perfect, a really busy spot with lots of boats. 366 00:19:12,040 --> 00:19:16,639 Speaker 3: That sounds like exactly. Hey, Katherine, you also told me 367 00:19:16,760 --> 00:19:19,479 Speaker 3: after you came off the stage that when you were 368 00:19:19,600 --> 00:19:23,960 Speaker 3: speaking to your daughter. Your daughter asked you, which story 369 00:19:24,480 --> 00:19:26,760 Speaker 3: are you going to tell, which makes me think you've 370 00:19:26,760 --> 00:19:28,160 Speaker 3: got a lot of stories, Catherine. 371 00:19:29,680 --> 00:19:29,879 Speaker 10: I do. 372 00:19:30,320 --> 00:19:31,280 Speaker 3: I do have a few. 373 00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:34,600 Speaker 7: Yes, Unfortunately you. 374 00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:37,080 Speaker 3: Told me there's one particular one about a tampon. 375 00:19:38,720 --> 00:19:38,960 Speaker 6: Yes. 376 00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:50,400 Speaker 3: Now it's probably not the time, next week, next week. 377 00:19:50,600 --> 00:19:54,920 Speaker 3: You have proven that you're an amazing storyteller, Catherine. So again, 378 00:19:55,280 --> 00:19:58,240 Speaker 3: congratulations from us and congratulations from strong boat. 379 00:19:58,760 --> 00:20:00,840 Speaker 11: Thank you so much, Thanks Will. 380 00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:04,840 Speaker 2: Thanks pleasure mate. It was a hell of a ride, 381 00:20:04,880 --> 00:20:07,399 Speaker 2: a hell of a time. Great story. Honestly that that 382 00:20:07,640 --> 00:20:09,280 Speaker 2: is one of the best stories I've ever heard. 383 00:20:09,359 --> 00:20:09,679 Speaker 3: Captain. 384 00:20:09,720 --> 00:20:14,600 Speaker 2: You really do deserve the money there. Incredible winmate, Thank you. 385 00:20:14,840 --> 00:20:16,400 Speaker 8: I'm here to tell the tale at least. 386 00:20:16,560 --> 00:20:17,879 Speaker 3: Yeah, I know, I know.