WEBVTT - Toxic Productivity

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<v Speaker 1>What the moon? Shut up and dance twelve and it's

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<v Speaker 1>past six Monday morning, Christian O'Connell's show for Keem Squarehouse.

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<v Speaker 2>Don't know how else with you and your wife.

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<v Speaker 1>But my wife her highlight of the weekend minus Friday night.

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<v Speaker 1>My wife says, Sunday, Sunday's a day of doing things, Chris.

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<v Speaker 1>We clean on Sundays too, that's us right, And I

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<v Speaker 1>get anxious on a Saturday night.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm like, oh my god, what's waiting for me?

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<v Speaker 1>Even then, given I've never given my task until Sunday morning,

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<v Speaker 1>I think otherwise she knows I'm at risk of flight,

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<v Speaker 1>like I might just run away. Actually, so I woke

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<v Speaker 1>up Sunday and then she was like, actually, do you

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<v Speaker 1>know what, Chris, Today's a day we need to do X,

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<v Speaker 1>Y and Z. And one that was my job was

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<v Speaker 1>to get my carcher out and strip away all the

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<v Speaker 1>varnish that she made me put on the back deck

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<v Speaker 1>two years ago. Too dark, Chris, too dark. Just put

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<v Speaker 1>that on and stripping it prepare take it all off.

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<v Speaker 1>So you know, when you start somethinking the whys, this

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<v Speaker 1>is going to take a lot longer. I thought, just

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<v Speaker 1>stripping away the varnish on that with the jet washer. Right,

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<v Speaker 1>just to do a small section, say about one foot

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<v Speaker 1>by one foot, took about ten minutes.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I was going to say, not an easy job.

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<v Speaker 1>And not just that right, because you got to push,

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<v Speaker 1>you gotta hold it on tracing and then listen to

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<v Speaker 1>this guy, you got to hold it on. My hand

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<v Speaker 1>was getting small with the laxic acid build up in

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<v Speaker 1>my forearms and my biceps. It took me a couple

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<v Speaker 1>of hours, and halfway through I realized this is today.

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<v Speaker 1>This is all I'm going to have to show for

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<v Speaker 1>That was like, Sisyphus is doing this back deck. So anyway,

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<v Speaker 1>my wife then is also getting my nettinies my haut

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<v Speaker 1>to get our seventeen year old daughter or a seventeen

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<v Speaker 1>year old daughter, she needs to tidy up as well.

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<v Speaker 1>Now you went to your kids who in teenage years,

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<v Speaker 1>you come at them on a Sunday and say you

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<v Speaker 1>need to tidy and clean the car and all these

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<v Speaker 1>things that she promised she would do to have the

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<v Speaker 1>advance on her pocket money. I said to my wife

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<v Speaker 1>during the week when she said, hey, listen, if you

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<v Speaker 1>give me pocket money early, I'll do a lot of stuff.

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<v Speaker 1>The week. Yeah, that isn't happening. Get her to do

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<v Speaker 1>it now or it's never going to be done. Yesterday,

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<v Speaker 1>having a right it was like an insurgence battle, right

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<v Speaker 1>with someone throwing bombs you on the street. But my

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<v Speaker 1>wife goes to me, you go up there, right, She's

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<v Speaker 1>just slammed the door on my face, and I go,

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<v Speaker 1>it's okay. I operate from a different way. I'm kind

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<v Speaker 1>of like a horse whisper for teenagers.

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<v Speaker 2>Take the jet washer's defense.

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<v Speaker 1>Start clean down her bedroom. Yes, she accused me of

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<v Speaker 1>having I've written this down so I've not heard this before.

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<v Speaker 1>Toxic productivity. Actually I laugh like that, Joe, that is good.

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<v Speaker 1>I said, let me just get my phone and write

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<v Speaker 1>that in there that. I went, Wow, you put that.

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<v Speaker 1>They bandied that toxic word around now a lot. Toxic productivity.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, now you can put toxic in front of everything.

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<v Speaker 2>That's if that's the case.

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<v Speaker 1>I said, your behavior in now toxic teenager ing for you,

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<v Speaker 1>Mum and I. So we're meant to clean all this up.

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<v Speaker 1>So we have this running battle for a couple of hours,

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<v Speaker 1>me her and my wife. My wife is texting me going,

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<v Speaker 1>can you go up there again? And I have to

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<v Speaker 1>keep going, and she says, what is it now? What's

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<v Speaker 1>mum setting you up to do? Anyway, yesterday evening to

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<v Speaker 1>create some sort of peace, I did something I haven't

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<v Speaker 1>done since I was a kid, and I loved it.

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<v Speaker 1>I saw that she was watching TV by itself. I said, hey,

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<v Speaker 1>do you want to watch something together? Shouldn't? Yeah? I

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<v Speaker 1>saw that shod a bowl of Coca Pops. I went

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<v Speaker 1>and got a bowl of Coca Pops. It's a brave

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<v Speaker 1>new world at fifty. Why have I waited so long

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<v Speaker 1>to have Coca Pops again? I reckon the last time

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<v Speaker 1>I had a chat I was a kid.

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<v Speaker 2>And not even that having it not at breakfast is

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<v Speaker 2>just an added bonus on top of.

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<v Speaker 1>That, someday you get a bit of the old Sunday blues.

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<v Speaker 1>I've now worked out a way finally, not no more

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<v Speaker 1>where you've got bowl of Coca Pops on a go