WEBVTT - Supporting men & stepping into your feme energy with Monica Yates *Trigger Warning*

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<v Speaker 1>Last wave of the feminist movement has been the most damaging,

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<v Speaker 1>and that it has been a movement where like you said, Georgie,

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<v Speaker 1>the pendulum has swung to the other side where it's

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<v Speaker 1>now fuck men, and it's all this anger coming out,

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<v Speaker 1>and it's just it's generational trauma. It's generational anger.

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<v Speaker 2>Welcome back to the Rise and Conquered Podcast. I'm your host,

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<v Speaker 2>Georgie Stevenson, former lawyer turned entrepreneur, social media personality and

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<v Speaker 2>personal development junkie. This podcast is for my girl gang

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<v Speaker 2>who want to feed their mind with positive and expansive

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<v Speaker 2>thoughts to help them step into their power and live

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<v Speaker 2>their most authentic life. We chat a variety of topics

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<v Speaker 2>including mindset, business, relationships, health, and so much more. Basically,

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<v Speaker 2>wherever you are on your journey, I want to help

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<v Speaker 2>you you feel inspired and empowered to rise up and

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<v Speaker 2>conquer your next bold move I know that's going to

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<v Speaker 2>look different for everyone, but just no, I'm right here

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<v Speaker 2>by your side and that you have the.

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<v Speaker 3>RNC community behind you. Let's do this.

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<v Speaker 2>Hello and welcome back to the Rise and Conquer Podcast. Guys,

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<v Speaker 2>do I have a spicy ep for you today? We

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<v Speaker 2>are joined by Monica Yates And this is actually Monica's

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<v Speaker 2>second time on the podcast. You guys loved her first episode,

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<v Speaker 2>so we are back for a part two because we

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<v Speaker 2>really did not get the time to cover everything that.

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<v Speaker 3>I wanted to with Monica.

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<v Speaker 2>So if you don't know who Monica is, she is

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<v Speaker 2>a life coach. She is a queen of sex, pleasure,

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<v Speaker 2>fem masculine energy, men empowerment, business and life. She really

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<v Speaker 2>is a jack of all trades and you'll totally get

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<v Speaker 2>this vibe from the episode. But just her energy, her

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<v Speaker 2>vibe is so it's like magnetic, and her knowledge of

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<v Speaker 2>information and the way that she explains it is just

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<v Speaker 2>it's on point. So I just am aw every time

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<v Speaker 2>I listen to her. So today we are chatting about

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<v Speaker 2>men empowerment and Monica's view on the feminine movement.

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<v Speaker 3>Now bear with me.

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<v Speaker 2>With this episode, guys. It is very different, and I'm

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<v Speaker 2>going to be completely honest with you. I am someone

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<v Speaker 2>who's very pro feminism and I'm very like, I feel like,

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<v Speaker 2>for so long women were very suppressed and now we're

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<v Speaker 2>in a time where we are being so unapologetic. We

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<v Speaker 2>are doing our thing, and I absolutely love that. You know,

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<v Speaker 2>female empowerment is my thing. It's what I really bring

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<v Speaker 2>to this podcast. Monica is also about that. Do not

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<v Speaker 2>get us wrong, but Monica brings a really interesting point

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<v Speaker 2>to the podcast today about how this sort of time,

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<v Speaker 2>right now, we are emasculating men as a society. She

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<v Speaker 2>chats about how we can work towards empowering them to

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<v Speaker 2>take leads so our relationships, sex lives, and overall pleasure

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<v Speaker 2>in life are amplified. She has some really really interesting

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<v Speaker 2>points and we kind of go back and forth. So

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<v Speaker 2>this is like a really kind of I wouldn't call

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<v Speaker 2>it debating, but a little bit, you know what I'm like. So, yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>I just think it's a really insightful episode.

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<v Speaker 1>It's new.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't think you would have heard definitely not me

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<v Speaker 2>talk about there's probably not other podcasts. So I was

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<v Speaker 2>really excited to bring this to you guys, and I'm

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<v Speaker 2>really interested to see what you guys think. So after

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<v Speaker 2>this episode makes you come to the Facebook group, I'll

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<v Speaker 2>make sure I post a thread and I am really

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<v Speaker 2>interested to hear what you guys think, because I think

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<v Speaker 2>at the start you might be like me. And then

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<v Speaker 2>as Monica kind of explains, it is very interesting to

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<v Speaker 2>see her point of view. So let's get straight into it.

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<v Speaker 2>Let's welcome Monica to the show. Monica, welcome back to

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<v Speaker 2>the Rise and Conquer Podcast.

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<v Speaker 1>Thank you Georgie for having me again.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm so excited to chat to you. Guys.

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<v Speaker 2>We did a podcast. What was it, Maybe like a

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<v Speaker 2>month ago?

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<v Speaker 1>No, it was like, I think it was like two

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<v Speaker 1>months ago. I was in too Loom. It was like

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<v Speaker 1>maybe middle of February.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, so it was actually my doe have no concept

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<v Speaker 2>of time, so it was a couple of months ago.

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<v Speaker 2>I will make sure I link it in the show

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<v Speaker 2>notes because it was epic. It got so many downloads,

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<v Speaker 2>So many people loved that episode and they wanted more

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<v Speaker 2>of Monicas.

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<v Speaker 3>So I thought, let's do a bit of a.

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<v Speaker 2>Round two because I actually we just chatted so much

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<v Speaker 2>that I actually we had a whole other section of

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<v Speaker 2>questions that I wanted to chat to Monica about, and

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<v Speaker 2>we just didn't get time because it was already over

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<v Speaker 2>an hour long.

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<v Speaker 3>So that's what we're going to do today.

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<v Speaker 2>So first of all, guys, if you don't know who

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<v Speaker 2>Monica is, you're a bit confused. What's happening right now?

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<v Speaker 2>Press the link in the show notes, go back to

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<v Speaker 2>the first episode. Trust me when I say you're going

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<v Speaker 2>to want to hear that episode and then come back

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<v Speaker 2>here before we get into it. Monica, do you want

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<v Speaker 2>to just give a quick recap of who you are

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<v Speaker 2>and what you do?

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, quick recap and I'll keep it towards centered, towards

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<v Speaker 1>the topic for today's episode. So for today's episode, what

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<v Speaker 1>I do is I am a trauma healer and I

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<v Speaker 1>am a feminine embodiment coach, and I help women to

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<v Speaker 1>understand men, and I help men feel empowered by helping

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<v Speaker 1>women to understand how to stop the masculating men. So

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<v Speaker 1>there's this whole dynamic kind of going on in the

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<v Speaker 1>world where women are all trying to be like boss babe, misindependent,

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<v Speaker 1>and at the same time they're like, where's all the

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<v Speaker 1>good man next, y and there, And they don't understand

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<v Speaker 1>that all the man shaming is actually stopping men feeling

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<v Speaker 1>like they can really rise into their purpose and be

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<v Speaker 1>in their divine masculine and as a result, it's creating

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<v Speaker 1>what I was even talking about today on my Instagram

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<v Speaker 1>story on Instagram Live. What people are saying is like

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<v Speaker 1>soft men, like feminine men, and it's this weird cat

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<v Speaker 1>twenty two of like women are wanting these strong, powerful

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<v Speaker 1>men and then they're like, no, but we also want

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<v Speaker 1>men to be emotional and like, don't be too over

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<v Speaker 1>don't be too over dominating, x, Y and Z, and

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<v Speaker 1>men are feeling really lost in society and they're like,

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<v Speaker 1>we're not needed anymore. Women can do everything for ourselves,

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<v Speaker 1>so what's our purpose? And if you understand men, you

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<v Speaker 1>know that they need a purpose and if they don't

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<v Speaker 1>have a purpose, then they're not going to be in

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<v Speaker 1>that grounded, divine masculine leadership that makes the feminine feel

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<v Speaker 1>so safe. So this honestly could be a ten hour

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<v Speaker 1>long episode, so we're going to keep it short and sweet.

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<v Speaker 1>But I do want to say to everybody before anyone

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<v Speaker 1>jumps down my throat, it is a politically incorrect subject.

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<v Speaker 1>It can be really triggering. I would really encourage you

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<v Speaker 1>to go and listen to any of the other episodes

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<v Speaker 1>of IGTVS that I've done about this topic, because if

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<v Speaker 1>you're listening through the eyes of your or through the

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<v Speaker 1>ears of your trauma, it can be very hard for

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<v Speaker 1>you to have an open mind. So I would just

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<v Speaker 1>suggest to you before you jump down my throat to

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<v Speaker 1>just listen to on my other podcasts because it will

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<v Speaker 1>help you to understand a very complicated topic.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, so this is actually I really want to get

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<v Speaker 2>into this, Monica, And I actually haven't told you this. Also, guys,

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<v Speaker 2>me and Monica do coaching, so that's why we're very

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<v Speaker 2>friendly and it's like we know each other very well

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<v Speaker 2>because we have a lot of.

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<v Speaker 3>Conversations off air.

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<v Speaker 2>But I haven't told you this, Monica, But I remember

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<v Speaker 2>like finding you, loving your podcasts and topics.

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<v Speaker 3>But this was a topic.

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<v Speaker 2>That triggered me that I didn't like that. I actually

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<v Speaker 2>didn't watch or listen to any content because I just

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<v Speaker 2>wouldn't have it. Because I come from a background where

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<v Speaker 2>I had a very strong father father figure. I had,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, very feminie mum who was a housewife, and

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<v Speaker 2>I really wanted to step into the role of independent women.

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<v Speaker 2>I didn't want to have to you know, I wanted

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<v Speaker 2>to be the breadwinner. I wanted to be able to

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<v Speaker 2>look after myself and all these things. And I really felt,

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<v Speaker 2>I guess oppressed from men at a certain stage of

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<v Speaker 2>my life. So I developed this kind of almost like

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<v Speaker 2>protection of what you're saying of this woman who does

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<v Speaker 2>it or who has it all, who doesn't need a man.

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<v Speaker 2>And so when you started talking about this content, it

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<v Speaker 2>was very triggering to me because I did feel like,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, for so long men have had this you know,

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<v Speaker 2>certain power, and I'm like, you know me, I'm like, girl,

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<v Speaker 2>gang women, let's do the thing. I'm I'm a female

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<v Speaker 2>empowerment person.

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<v Speaker 3>That is like my brand, that's me.

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<v Speaker 2>But that's why I think your content came to me

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<v Speaker 2>because I'm such a big believer on you know, things

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<v Speaker 2>that trigger you and things you need pop up when

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<v Speaker 2>you need them. So it is something and I'm no

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<v Speaker 2>pro and I haven't you know, done all the work,

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<v Speaker 2>but it is something I wanted to bring up because

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<v Speaker 2>I remember you talking about it and me going, this

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<v Speaker 2>is such an interesting topic because it's almost like the

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<v Speaker 2>pendulant has swung completely opposite way. We've gone from you know,

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<v Speaker 2>women having rights. We've gone from being independent, working, being

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<v Speaker 2>the bread winners, not you know, having sex toys, not

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<v Speaker 2>needing men for those reasons, and then like you said,

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<v Speaker 2>it's yeah, really swung the opposite way where we're kind

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<v Speaker 2>of having Yeah, I guess this stuff happened and so

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<v Speaker 2>I really wanted to bring this up because it's triggering

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<v Speaker 2>for me.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and Georgie, you are one of a large group

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<v Speaker 1>of my clients and past clients as well that have

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<v Speaker 1>hated me to begin with. Found me so triggering. Who

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<v Speaker 1>the fuck is this bit? That I end up being like, Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>there's some truth to what she's saying. I'm going to

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<v Speaker 1>hire her now, And then they end up being my

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<v Speaker 1>biggest fans because they're like, no, what she says is

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<v Speaker 1>really truthful. And it worked and it changed my relationship.

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<v Speaker 2>Because I think for me, like, I'm so used to

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<v Speaker 2>following people who are full girl gang, who are like,

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<v Speaker 2>let's fucking do it for the girls, and you are

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<v Speaker 2>It's not like you're not that person. But I think

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<v Speaker 2>for so long because like I said, I did feel

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<v Speaker 2>so oppressed by men at a certain stage that I

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<v Speaker 2>really reacted, and then that reaction has grown me into

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<v Speaker 2>who I am. I feel a sense of like, not acknowledgment,

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<v Speaker 2>but I feel this sense of I have to yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>the girls, I have to back that movement movement because

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<v Speaker 2>it has grown me into the person I am. But anyway,

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<v Speaker 2>enough about me, let's get into it. So and I

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<v Speaker 2>just want to preface this because I think this is

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<v Speaker 2>something I didn't understand at the site at the start.

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<v Speaker 2>Sorry is Monica is not. She's not talking about like,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, equal rights or you know that sort of

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<v Speaker 2>side of things. We're really talking about. Well, correct me

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<v Speaker 2>if I'm wrong, Monica, but like you know, the genetic

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<v Speaker 2>make cups of females and males, like biology world, yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>and our energy.

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<v Speaker 1>So to clarify what Georgie's saying, so, the first wave

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<v Speaker 1>of the feminist movement was obviously really important, and that

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<v Speaker 1>first wave wasn't a wave where it was like go women,

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<v Speaker 1>fuck men. Women were fighting for their rights. They were

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<v Speaker 1>fighting for the fact that they didn't have to be

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<v Speaker 1>housewives all the time, that they were allowed to vote,

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<v Speaker 1>they could go out into the world and they could work,

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<v Speaker 1>they could do their own thing. That's what they were

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<v Speaker 1>fighting for, which was amazing. There's been four waves of

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<v Speaker 1>the feminist movement and the second wave of the me

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<v Speaker 1>too and the last wave of the feminist movement has

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<v Speaker 1>been the most damaging, and that it has been a

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<v Speaker 1>movement where like you said, Georgie, the pendulum has swung

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<v Speaker 1>to the other side where it's now fuck men and

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<v Speaker 1>it's all this anger coming out, and it's just it's

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<v Speaker 1>generational trauma. It's generational anger of this anger coming out,

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<v Speaker 1>and it's if you really look deeply into it, which

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<v Speaker 1>I won't go into, but I am going to go

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<v Speaker 1>into in my book, which I don't know when the

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<v Speaker 1>fuck's coming out, it's taking you've read a right point

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<v Speaker 1>being is if you really really look, I keep look

0:12:16.320 --> 0:12:19.320
<v Speaker 1>changing what I'm saying, and it's really hard classical when

0:12:19.320 --> 0:12:23.160
<v Speaker 1>you really look into it. A lot of the wording

0:12:23.800 --> 0:12:27.400
<v Speaker 1>with this modern feminism that's being run through social media

0:12:27.640 --> 0:12:32.600
<v Speaker 1>is actually positioning women to feel like victims. It's like

0:12:32.760 --> 0:12:36.520
<v Speaker 1>poor women, we have no rights, poor women like like,

0:12:36.840 --> 0:12:38.880
<v Speaker 1>we have all these issues, and it's if you really

0:12:38.960 --> 0:12:41.280
<v Speaker 1>look closely at it, it's actually a lot of victimization

0:12:41.360 --> 0:12:44.320
<v Speaker 1>of women, which is that's how I felt, yeah, which

0:12:44.360 --> 0:12:47.959
<v Speaker 1>is really damaging to these young women coming through because

0:12:48.000 --> 0:12:51.439
<v Speaker 1>they're not being they're not being fed the story of like, girl,

0:12:51.520 --> 0:12:54.520
<v Speaker 1>you have all the rights that you've you've never had

0:12:54.840 --> 0:12:58.080
<v Speaker 1>this much power in history, fucking you do what you

0:12:58.120 --> 0:13:00.439
<v Speaker 1>want to do. It's actually being fed we're being that

0:13:00.679 --> 0:13:04.200
<v Speaker 1>story of like you're still oppressed and we're fucking not

0:13:04.760 --> 0:13:07.120
<v Speaker 1>we are not like we live. And yes, in some

0:13:07.160 --> 0:13:10.000
<v Speaker 1>countries you still are like which needs to be worked on.

0:13:10.280 --> 0:13:12.160
<v Speaker 1>But if you're listening to this podcast, you're probably living

0:13:12.160 --> 0:13:14.640
<v Speaker 1>in a first world country, and you're probably living in

0:13:14.679 --> 0:13:17.160
<v Speaker 1>a country where you know you can dress however the

0:13:17.200 --> 0:13:19.199
<v Speaker 1>fuck you want and nothing bad's gonna happen to you

0:13:19.280 --> 0:13:21.760
<v Speaker 1>as a woman, which is fantastic, right, So for these

0:13:21.880 --> 0:13:24.600
<v Speaker 1>kind of for these women living in these countries, we

0:13:24.679 --> 0:13:26.840
<v Speaker 1>are not oppressed. And when we're being sold the story,

0:13:26.880 --> 0:13:31.079
<v Speaker 1>which is it's being heavily sold through like social media

0:13:31.160 --> 0:13:34.920
<v Speaker 1>influences and celebrities that don't fully understand this topic and

0:13:34.960 --> 0:13:38.319
<v Speaker 1>they're just kind of being sheep to the noise it is.

0:13:38.480 --> 0:13:40.880
<v Speaker 1>It is really damaging to young women coming through because

0:13:40.880 --> 0:13:44.000
<v Speaker 1>they're not understanding men and women at a biological level.

0:13:44.360 --> 0:13:47.360
<v Speaker 1>And that biological level, which what you were saying before, Georgie,

0:13:47.720 --> 0:13:50.439
<v Speaker 1>is the fact that in our DNA, I don't give

0:13:50.440 --> 0:13:52.480
<v Speaker 1>a fuck what your beliefs are, what your political beliefs are.

0:13:52.600 --> 0:13:55.920
<v Speaker 1>In our DNA, men are the protectors and the providers

0:13:56.280 --> 0:13:59.000
<v Speaker 1>and women are the ones, and we can still go

0:13:59.080 --> 0:14:00.640
<v Speaker 1>out and make money. I'm not saying that. I mean,

0:14:00.640 --> 0:14:02.800
<v Speaker 1>look at us, you both around our own businesses. But

0:14:02.880 --> 0:14:06.880
<v Speaker 1>women are the nurturing ones, the caring ones, the ones

0:14:06.920 --> 0:14:10.240
<v Speaker 1>that thrive with connection. Men's number one need is passion

0:14:10.320 --> 0:14:15.480
<v Speaker 1>and purpose. Women's number one need is intimacy and connection.

0:14:16.080 --> 0:14:18.520
<v Speaker 1>And when you work from that level, you see that

0:14:18.559 --> 0:14:21.480
<v Speaker 1>we fit perfectly together. And women are all saying in

0:14:21.560 --> 0:14:24.400
<v Speaker 1>society that men make them feel unsafe, but the reality

0:14:24.560 --> 0:14:30.560
<v Speaker 1>is that these men, especially younger men coming through society,

0:14:31.040 --> 0:14:36.040
<v Speaker 1>they're not being raised with these amazing, grounded masculine role models,

0:14:36.440 --> 0:14:40.480
<v Speaker 1>and as a result, they're not embodied in their biological

0:14:40.640 --> 0:14:44.840
<v Speaker 1>energy of being the protector and the provider in our society.

0:14:45.160 --> 0:14:48.000
<v Speaker 1>And as a result of that, the feminine and women,

0:14:48.040 --> 0:14:51.120
<v Speaker 1>the majority of us have a feminine call. Women as

0:14:51.120 --> 0:14:54.200
<v Speaker 1>a result, can't feel as safe. So then women go

0:14:54.240 --> 0:14:57.440
<v Speaker 1>into this hyper masculine, this armor like you were describing before,

0:14:57.760 --> 0:14:59.880
<v Speaker 1>you go into this armor of like, well, I have

0:15:00.080 --> 0:15:03.360
<v Speaker 1>to protect myself because I'm not safe around men. And

0:15:03.400 --> 0:15:05.360
<v Speaker 1>as a result, we go and we hustle, we burn

0:15:05.360 --> 0:15:08.000
<v Speaker 1>ourselves out. We're not happy deep down. And if you

0:15:08.040 --> 0:15:09.680
<v Speaker 1>say to yourself, no, I am happy, I'm killing it

0:15:09.720 --> 0:15:12.960
<v Speaker 1>at work, you are not happy deep down. I used

0:15:12.960 --> 0:15:16.560
<v Speaker 1>to tell myself that and even like when I'm working

0:15:16.640 --> 0:15:18.800
<v Speaker 1>really hard, I have to be so careful because it's

0:15:18.800 --> 0:15:22.080
<v Speaker 1>so easy to go. I'm really happy. But let's cut

0:15:22.120 --> 0:15:24.840
<v Speaker 1>to the chase. You will never be as happy as

0:15:24.880 --> 0:15:27.040
<v Speaker 1>when you are surrounded by a group of your friends

0:15:27.040 --> 0:15:29.480
<v Speaker 1>having so much fun and not having a care in

0:15:29.520 --> 0:15:32.640
<v Speaker 1>the world, and there being men in the room that

0:15:32.720 --> 0:15:36.880
<v Speaker 1>you trust. Where your biology knows if someone if a

0:15:36.920 --> 0:15:39.680
<v Speaker 1>predator was to walk into the room, you would be

0:15:39.760 --> 0:15:41.560
<v Speaker 1>safe and a man would stand in front of you

0:15:41.640 --> 0:15:44.480
<v Speaker 1>to save your life. That is what creates safety for

0:15:44.560 --> 0:15:48.680
<v Speaker 1>women on a biological level. And when we're missing.

0:15:48.320 --> 0:15:52.560
<v Speaker 2>That key piece, yes, so yeah, explaining one hundred percent,

0:15:52.760 --> 0:15:57.520
<v Speaker 2>So I get what you mean. I guess what's hard

0:15:57.640 --> 0:16:00.840
<v Speaker 2>for me is and this says I'm going to be

0:16:01.360 --> 0:16:02.640
<v Speaker 2>rebutting you this whole time.

0:16:02.800 --> 0:16:04.320
<v Speaker 1>This is good. I was going to say, yeah, challenge me,

0:16:04.320 --> 0:16:06.040
<v Speaker 1>because then I can explain it for people that don't

0:16:06.040 --> 0:16:10.680
<v Speaker 1>get it. Yeah, perfect, R and C.

0:16:10.880 --> 0:16:14.560
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0:16:14.640 --> 0:16:18.960
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0:16:26.720 --> 0:16:30.840
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0:16:30.960 --> 0:16:34.840
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0:16:34.920 --> 0:16:38.240
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0:16:38.400 --> 0:16:43.040
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0:16:43.120 --> 0:16:46.360
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0:16:46.400 --> 0:16:49.920
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0:16:50.160 --> 0:16:53.760
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0:16:54.280 --> 0:16:56.800
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0:16:56.880 --> 0:17:00.520
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0:17:00.520 --> 0:17:05.560
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0:17:05.880 --> 0:17:09.879
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0:17:09.960 --> 0:17:13.719
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0:17:13.800 --> 0:17:17.560
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0:17:20.920 --> 0:17:24.280
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0:17:24.320 --> 0:17:28.119
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0:17:43.480 --> 0:17:46.400
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0:18:06.320 --> 0:18:12.520
<v Speaker 2>today's episode. So, I like, I do agree with you

0:18:12.720 --> 0:18:17.639
<v Speaker 2>for example, though I do still think and I like,

0:18:17.760 --> 0:18:18.520
<v Speaker 2>don't get me wrong.

0:18:18.600 --> 0:18:19.359
<v Speaker 3>I love my family.

0:18:19.880 --> 0:18:24.000
<v Speaker 2>I love my family, I love my parents. But for example,

0:18:24.240 --> 0:18:26.920
<v Speaker 2>my I have three older brothers and they were raised,

0:18:27.040 --> 0:18:29.280
<v Speaker 2>you know, by my mom and dad, and my dad

0:18:29.359 --> 0:18:34.800
<v Speaker 2>is very much that protector, that father figure, that masculine energy.

0:18:35.960 --> 0:18:38.080
<v Speaker 2>For me, I kind of look at my brothers and

0:18:38.119 --> 0:18:43.160
<v Speaker 2>their relationships and it does feel like it is too

0:18:44.840 --> 0:18:50.160
<v Speaker 2>swung the opsway of not we're talking about where it's

0:18:50.200 --> 0:18:53.760
<v Speaker 2>too masculine and it feels not oppressive because I, you know,

0:18:53.840 --> 0:18:55.760
<v Speaker 2>don't want to put that sort of out there. But

0:18:56.640 --> 0:19:00.040
<v Speaker 2>I guess for me in my relationships in life, I

0:19:00.080 --> 0:19:03.639
<v Speaker 2>get what you're saying, but how can we sort of

0:19:04.040 --> 0:19:07.520
<v Speaker 2>And I think that's why in my personal relationship, I

0:19:07.640 --> 0:19:12.240
<v Speaker 2>very much chose a partner who is not he's definitely masculine.

0:19:12.280 --> 0:19:15.480
<v Speaker 2>He's definitely a protector, Like he very much fits that

0:19:15.600 --> 0:19:20.440
<v Speaker 2>typical Trady role, which I find so sexy and so

0:19:20.680 --> 0:19:24.879
<v Speaker 2>like fits my you know, that sort of side of things.

0:19:24.920 --> 0:19:29.280
<v Speaker 2>But for me, his actual personality is not overbearing. It's

0:19:29.320 --> 0:19:35.439
<v Speaker 2>not like, you know, I'm the bread women get So,

0:19:35.640 --> 0:19:38.119
<v Speaker 2>I guess like to finish it in saying that, though,

0:19:38.640 --> 0:19:42.800
<v Speaker 2>how can we sort of bring this new dynamic where

0:19:42.840 --> 0:19:47.360
<v Speaker 2>we are equal but we're not emasculating men, but we're

0:19:47.400 --> 0:19:50.920
<v Speaker 2>still able to because for me sometimes it feels like, oh,

0:19:50.960 --> 0:19:52.600
<v Speaker 2>so should I not step in my power?

0:19:52.680 --> 0:19:54.359
<v Speaker 3>Should I not be this boss bitch?

0:19:54.480 --> 0:19:54.560
<v Speaker 1>Like?

0:19:55.000 --> 0:19:59.360
<v Speaker 2>How can I still feel pattern I said? Got you

0:19:59.760 --> 0:20:04.399
<v Speaker 2>so with your brothers? With your brothers, do you feel

0:20:04.440 --> 0:20:07.439
<v Speaker 2>like they are overbearing? Is that what you're saying to me?

0:20:09.000 --> 0:20:14.400
<v Speaker 2>They're just very much typical male energy, And it's just

0:20:14.520 --> 0:20:17.159
<v Speaker 2>for me personally, like I could never be in a

0:20:17.240 --> 0:20:20.240
<v Speaker 2>relationship with someone like that because it would be too

0:20:20.359 --> 0:20:20.919
<v Speaker 2>much for me.

0:20:21.440 --> 0:20:22.320
<v Speaker 3>Does that make sense?

0:20:22.440 --> 0:20:24.720
<v Speaker 1>Okay, so it does make sense. So this is where

0:20:25.000 --> 0:20:29.520
<v Speaker 1>we're needing to be very clear in society and the

0:20:29.600 --> 0:20:32.639
<v Speaker 1>messages that we're putting out on what we're trying to

0:20:33.040 --> 0:20:35.080
<v Speaker 1>heal within the masculines. You know how this whole thing

0:20:35.119 --> 0:20:37.399
<v Speaker 1>of like toxic masculine to get rid of toxic masculinity,

0:20:37.640 --> 0:20:41.040
<v Speaker 1>there's no definition of what that is. And the only

0:20:41.200 --> 0:20:44.200
<v Speaker 1>real solution quote unquote is to make men more feminine.

0:20:44.240 --> 0:20:46.840
<v Speaker 1>But that's not what the best solution would be. So

0:20:46.920 --> 0:20:49.280
<v Speaker 1>let's say, for example, that you're talking about men that

0:20:49.320 --> 0:20:52.960
<v Speaker 1>are very overbearing and they feel too much. They could

0:20:53.040 --> 0:20:56.280
<v Speaker 1>be expressing toxic masculine traits. And I hate that word

0:20:56.320 --> 0:20:58.560
<v Speaker 1>toxic because it's not toxic. It's actually it's small wounded.

0:20:58.600 --> 0:21:00.880
<v Speaker 1>It's just like a trauma response. But let's say, for.

0:21:00.800 --> 0:21:03.720
<v Speaker 2>Example, that's yeah, that's okay.

0:21:03.960 --> 0:21:06.159
<v Speaker 1>So for example, thing where.

0:21:06.040 --> 0:21:08.399
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, oh no, some of the stuff they say

0:21:08.440 --> 0:21:10.399
<v Speaker 2>to their wives, I would not fucking tolerate it.

0:21:10.960 --> 0:21:14.000
<v Speaker 1>Okay, Okay, cool, So that's good clarification. So that's more

0:21:14.040 --> 0:21:18.600
<v Speaker 1>of a wounded masculine thing, and that is because they

0:21:18.680 --> 0:21:22.520
<v Speaker 1>have not been taught like grounded masculine quality. So a

0:21:22.560 --> 0:21:27.600
<v Speaker 1>grounded masculine man would never feel too much for a

0:21:27.640 --> 0:21:31.120
<v Speaker 1>woman's nervous system. So when your brothers feel too much,

0:21:31.200 --> 0:21:34.440
<v Speaker 1>that's too much for your nervous system. A really grounded

0:21:34.560 --> 0:21:39.960
<v Speaker 1>masculine man makes your nervous system go. It's like just

0:21:40.160 --> 0:21:44.520
<v Speaker 1>so relaxing. That's what a really grounded masculine man is.

0:21:44.560 --> 0:21:47.520
<v Speaker 1>So in society when we're talking about like get rid

0:21:47.520 --> 0:21:52.840
<v Speaker 1>of all this toxic masculine, this mucho marcho macho culture, right,

0:21:53.520 --> 0:21:57.960
<v Speaker 1>what we're talking about is this egotistical kind of man

0:21:58.080 --> 0:22:00.800
<v Speaker 1>right where they're run by their ego. They're actually not

0:22:00.920 --> 0:22:04.520
<v Speaker 1>heart scentered at all, and our feminine that is very

0:22:04.560 --> 0:22:07.159
<v Speaker 1>off putting to us because it feels a little bit

0:22:07.280 --> 0:22:10.800
<v Speaker 1>dangerous because they're not grounded in their body. So you're like,

0:22:11.480 --> 0:22:14.119
<v Speaker 1>you don't feel as safe with them because you're like,

0:22:14.680 --> 0:22:16.879
<v Speaker 1>do they know right from wrong? Because they're all in

0:22:16.920 --> 0:22:21.080
<v Speaker 1>their head. For example, that can be the egotistical masculine

0:22:21.080 --> 0:22:22.679
<v Speaker 1>that we're trying to get rid of. But it's not

0:22:22.720 --> 0:22:26.280
<v Speaker 1>even necessarily the egotistical masculine. I want to correct myself.

0:22:26.320 --> 0:22:29.600
<v Speaker 1>It's just egotistical behavior full stop. It's just a trauma response.

0:22:29.800 --> 0:22:31.960
<v Speaker 1>And that can also show up in women. And how

0:22:32.000 --> 0:22:35.080
<v Speaker 1>that can show up in women is women that are

0:22:35.359 --> 0:22:39.560
<v Speaker 1>again very overbearing, very egotistical, very very vain, only care

0:22:39.600 --> 0:22:42.200
<v Speaker 1>about people's appearances, that kind of stuff that would be

0:22:42.200 --> 0:22:44.800
<v Speaker 1>an egotistical feminine kind of trait. So really we want

0:22:44.840 --> 0:22:46.280
<v Speaker 1>to just say we just want to get rid of

0:22:46.320 --> 0:22:50.000
<v Speaker 1>the egotistical stuff. Now in society, what's then happened is

0:22:50.040 --> 0:22:52.200
<v Speaker 1>we're trying to suppress the masculine. All this' quote unquote

0:22:52.240 --> 0:22:56.120
<v Speaker 1>toxy masculine, which is suppressing all masculine, all chivalry, all

0:22:56.200 --> 0:22:59.600
<v Speaker 1>leadership for a lot of men. Women are still wanting

0:22:59.600 --> 0:23:02.479
<v Speaker 1>it though, and men are feeling like they're being pushed

0:23:02.520 --> 0:23:04.680
<v Speaker 1>into more of this, like, well, I have to now

0:23:04.720 --> 0:23:07.560
<v Speaker 1>be really emotional and really feminine. There is a time

0:23:07.640 --> 0:23:09.560
<v Speaker 1>and a place for that, I want to add, right,

0:23:09.600 --> 0:23:12.479
<v Speaker 1>So there is there is a correct environment that you

0:23:12.520 --> 0:23:14.400
<v Speaker 1>have to read as a man of when you can

0:23:14.440 --> 0:23:17.359
<v Speaker 1>be softer and more emotional where it won't make your

0:23:17.400 --> 0:23:21.280
<v Speaker 1>woman feel unsafe, And there is a time and a

0:23:21.320 --> 0:23:22.920
<v Speaker 1>place where you don't want to do that because it

0:23:22.920 --> 0:23:26.560
<v Speaker 1>will make your woman feel unsafe. Now, on your point

0:23:26.680 --> 0:23:29.760
<v Speaker 1>of like you want to not emasculate men, but you

0:23:29.800 --> 0:23:32.399
<v Speaker 1>also want to be in your power. There is a

0:23:32.520 --> 0:23:36.720
<v Speaker 1>difference between you being in your power, Georgie, and you

0:23:37.560 --> 0:23:41.520
<v Speaker 1>crushing someone else so that you can be in your power.

0:23:42.359 --> 0:23:44.760
<v Speaker 1>So when you're in your power, it's like, I'm in

0:23:44.800 --> 0:23:48.960
<v Speaker 1>my power and you can be in your power. The emasculation,

0:23:49.080 --> 0:23:51.560
<v Speaker 1>all the crushing is I'm in my power and you're

0:23:51.600 --> 0:23:53.320
<v Speaker 1>not allowed to be in your power when I'm in

0:23:53.320 --> 0:23:53.800
<v Speaker 1>my power.

0:23:54.160 --> 0:23:57.720
<v Speaker 2>Interesting, and I'm going to be completely honest, I do

0:23:57.960 --> 0:24:01.560
<v Speaker 2>sometimes I think because of my you know, trauma and past,

0:24:01.840 --> 0:24:03.920
<v Speaker 2>I do sometimes do that obviously not on.

0:24:03.880 --> 0:24:05.959
<v Speaker 3>Purpose, but can you chat to us?

0:24:06.000 --> 0:24:10.199
<v Speaker 2>So for example, what does what does the balance look like?

0:24:10.359 --> 0:24:11.600
<v Speaker 3>What does it look.

0:24:11.440 --> 0:24:15.280
<v Speaker 2>Like to be on your power to not emasculate you know,

0:24:15.560 --> 0:24:19.480
<v Speaker 2>your male partner or your partner when they're in their

0:24:19.520 --> 0:24:23.280
<v Speaker 2>masculine energy, Like, what does that balance look like?

0:24:24.040 --> 0:24:26.399
<v Speaker 1>I love this, Okay, so let's like just do like

0:24:26.560 --> 0:24:28.320
<v Speaker 1>even some examples, I feel like that's going to be

0:24:28.320 --> 0:24:29.959
<v Speaker 1>the best way to kind of help the picture. So

0:24:30.520 --> 0:24:34.320
<v Speaker 1>for me personally, as an example, I majority of the

0:24:34.359 --> 0:24:40.560
<v Speaker 1>time make more money and I am obviously a powerful woman.

0:24:40.600 --> 0:24:42.879
<v Speaker 1>I run my own business X, Y and Z. Now

0:24:43.119 --> 0:24:45.720
<v Speaker 1>that is me at work, but the reality is I

0:24:45.760 --> 0:24:47.960
<v Speaker 1>also have a side to myself and we all do

0:24:48.040 --> 0:24:50.800
<v Speaker 1>as feminine women. You do as well, Georgie, where I

0:24:50.840 --> 0:24:53.000
<v Speaker 1>want to be looked after. So at the end of

0:24:53.040 --> 0:24:55.320
<v Speaker 1>the day, I don't want to still have to have

0:24:55.359 --> 0:24:58.040
<v Speaker 1>my fucking boss hat on and be figuring out what

0:24:58.119 --> 0:25:00.680
<v Speaker 1>I'm making for dinner, what's going on on the next day,

0:25:00.680 --> 0:25:02.960
<v Speaker 1>and taking out the garbage. Fuck that shit, I'm done

0:25:02.960 --> 0:25:05.920
<v Speaker 1>for the day. So at the end of the day,

0:25:06.119 --> 0:25:08.399
<v Speaker 1>what that would look like is me dropping into the

0:25:08.400 --> 0:25:11.720
<v Speaker 1>more of that softness and my man figuring out what

0:25:11.760 --> 0:25:13.600
<v Speaker 1>the fuck we're doing for dinner and taking out the

0:25:13.640 --> 0:25:16.719
<v Speaker 1>garbage and doing all that kind of stuff. Other examples

0:25:16.760 --> 0:25:19.600
<v Speaker 1>can be that he might be like, hey, babe, let's

0:25:19.600 --> 0:25:22.720
<v Speaker 1>go I've booked a restaurant for sushi tonight, Like, how

0:25:22.720 --> 0:25:24.159
<v Speaker 1>does that sound to you? And if I was if

0:25:24.200 --> 0:25:26.280
<v Speaker 1>I was really like, no, I don't want sushi, I

0:25:26.320 --> 0:25:28.919
<v Speaker 1>want Italian, I would just be like, that's like I

0:25:29.000 --> 0:25:32.560
<v Speaker 1>really appreciate babe, that you've made plans. Can we swap

0:25:32.560 --> 0:25:35.520
<v Speaker 1>to Italian? I'm really craving that. That would be how

0:25:35.520 --> 0:25:37.520
<v Speaker 1>you can answer it, because it's like, I'm still speaking

0:25:37.560 --> 0:25:40.560
<v Speaker 1>my truth. I'm not gonna be a fucking doormat. We

0:25:40.640 --> 0:25:42.640
<v Speaker 1>are not. I want to clarify that we are not

0:25:42.680 --> 0:25:46.440
<v Speaker 1>talking about women being doormats. Here, speak your truth. It's

0:25:46.600 --> 0:25:49.920
<v Speaker 1>just don't emasculate someone. So I read like the whole

0:25:49.960 --> 0:25:53.080
<v Speaker 1>sushi date night. An emasculating way would to be, to

0:25:53.160 --> 0:25:55.399
<v Speaker 1>be in a masculine way to say it would be,

0:25:55.720 --> 0:25:57.280
<v Speaker 1>I don't want to go to sushi. When did I

0:25:57.320 --> 0:25:59.680
<v Speaker 1>say I want to go to sushi? Like we didn't

0:25:59.680 --> 0:26:00.000
<v Speaker 1>even ask.

0:26:00.119 --> 0:26:05.480
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that's emasculating, so like, so subtle, but so different.

0:26:05.520 --> 0:26:09.080
<v Speaker 1>So different. But the way that I was saying it previously,

0:26:09.320 --> 0:26:12.440
<v Speaker 1>mind people was Babe, thank you so much for making

0:26:12.440 --> 0:26:14.200
<v Speaker 1>a dinner plan. I'm so excited to do out on

0:26:14.280 --> 0:26:18.680
<v Speaker 1>date night. I really am not feeling like sushi. Can

0:26:18.720 --> 0:26:22.320
<v Speaker 1>we do Italian? I'd really love Italian tonight. That's how

0:26:22.320 --> 0:26:24.120
<v Speaker 1>you would do. And he'd probably be like, yeah, fine,

0:26:24.359 --> 0:26:26.520
<v Speaker 1>I'll call them right now, because he wants you to

0:26:26.560 --> 0:26:29.240
<v Speaker 1>be happy. The thing is, and the reason why men

0:26:29.320 --> 0:26:32.679
<v Speaker 1>will often like zip their mouths for so long when

0:26:32.680 --> 0:26:34.520
<v Speaker 1>they're being emasculated, until it gets to a point where

0:26:34.520 --> 0:26:36.879
<v Speaker 1>it's like I'm done, I can't do this anymore. The

0:26:36.960 --> 0:26:38.879
<v Speaker 1>reason why they zip their mouths for so long is

0:26:38.920 --> 0:26:42.040
<v Speaker 1>because they want to please us, and they when you

0:26:42.080 --> 0:26:45.720
<v Speaker 1>shame a man, he internally is like, fuck, I'm not

0:26:45.840 --> 0:26:48.560
<v Speaker 1>a man. I've done a shit job. Oh my god,

0:26:48.720 --> 0:26:51.600
<v Speaker 1>And so they feel so bad about even the little

0:26:51.600 --> 0:26:53.600
<v Speaker 1>tiniest things. They won't show it to you per se,

0:26:54.119 --> 0:26:57.000
<v Speaker 1>but you have crushed them when you've said, why the

0:26:57.040 --> 0:26:59.240
<v Speaker 1>fuck did you book sushi? I didn't ask for sushi.

0:26:59.640 --> 0:27:03.439
<v Speaker 1>You crush them in that moment because they were just

0:27:03.720 --> 0:27:06.560
<v Speaker 1>trying to make your life easier. Men want to make

0:27:06.560 --> 0:27:10.080
<v Speaker 1>their lives easier, even little examples in my life is

0:27:10.440 --> 0:27:12.639
<v Speaker 1>even the male friends, they all know that. I'm like,

0:27:12.880 --> 0:27:14.840
<v Speaker 1>you got to do everything, not do everything, but majority

0:27:14.880 --> 0:27:16.960
<v Speaker 1>of things. Even like if I want out for dinner,

0:27:17.080 --> 0:27:18.960
<v Speaker 1>he will always book the restaurant. And there's it's not

0:27:19.040 --> 0:27:21.159
<v Speaker 1>about a polarity thing. I'm not dating and we're like friends.

0:27:21.400 --> 0:27:24.080
<v Speaker 1>He'll book the restaurant, he'll order the wine or whatever.

0:27:24.720 --> 0:27:27.240
<v Speaker 1>He will arrive at the restaurant before I'm there because

0:27:27.320 --> 0:27:31.679
<v Speaker 1>he knows that makes me really happy. He just knows that,

0:27:31.800 --> 0:27:34.439
<v Speaker 1>and I allow him to do that. And he is

0:27:34.560 --> 0:27:37.560
<v Speaker 1>happy because I allow him to do that. And that's

0:27:37.600 --> 0:27:39.760
<v Speaker 1>what I want you guys to understand of just like

0:27:39.880 --> 0:27:42.400
<v Speaker 1>we are happy when a man does something with it,

0:27:42.560 --> 0:27:44.719
<v Speaker 1>you know, and like your boyfriend takes the garbage out

0:27:44.720 --> 0:27:47.399
<v Speaker 1>with that you asking, or he plans date night and

0:27:47.440 --> 0:27:49.520
<v Speaker 1>you're like Oh my god, this makes me so happy

0:27:49.800 --> 0:27:52.760
<v Speaker 1>when you receive him from him doing that, that makes

0:27:52.800 --> 0:27:56.080
<v Speaker 1>him so happy, right, And I think, yep, you go jodging.

0:27:56.240 --> 0:27:58.199
<v Speaker 2>Sorry, Monica, I was just going to interject there and

0:27:58.280 --> 0:28:01.480
<v Speaker 2>say that's something that we talk about a lot, is receiving,

0:28:01.520 --> 0:28:04.840
<v Speaker 2>because it's something I struggle with because I'm such a doer.

0:28:05.080 --> 0:28:09.480
<v Speaker 2>And it's funny because I noticed this in my relation

0:28:10.000 --> 0:28:14.760
<v Speaker 2>relationship where Tim I think he had organized, yeah, like

0:28:14.800 --> 0:28:17.359
<v Speaker 2>a date night and he's like, it's a surprise, like

0:28:17.400 --> 0:28:20.080
<v Speaker 2>I've booked a restaurant, like he's trying to be really romantic.

0:28:20.680 --> 0:28:23.840
<v Speaker 2>I fucking hate surprises and I'm a control freak. So

0:28:24.040 --> 0:28:26.400
<v Speaker 2>I interjected and I'm like, tell me where it is.

0:28:26.840 --> 0:28:29.760
<v Speaker 2>What if I don't like it? Like and very you

0:28:29.800 --> 0:28:31.720
<v Speaker 2>can imagine like if you had just gone to the

0:28:31.800 --> 0:28:36.520
<v Speaker 2>trust this yeah, and not trusting him. And it's funny

0:28:36.560 --> 0:28:38.680
<v Speaker 2>because then he got his back up and he's like,

0:28:39.200 --> 0:28:41.480
<v Speaker 2>you know, you never trust me, and it's like and

0:28:41.520 --> 0:28:44.160
<v Speaker 2>then it causes this fight, and it's funny because we

0:28:44.520 --> 0:28:47.680
<v Speaker 2>He ended up telling me the restaurant was perfect, it

0:28:47.800 --> 0:28:50.360
<v Speaker 2>was the most amazing night, and I stood back and

0:28:50.440 --> 0:28:54.560
<v Speaker 2>thought to myself, I need to sit in this receivership

0:28:54.680 --> 0:29:00.120
<v Speaker 2>role where I do with yes literally, because I I

0:29:00.160 --> 0:29:02.920
<v Speaker 2>think it's a it can be a struggle for us,

0:29:03.120 --> 0:29:07.480
<v Speaker 2>especially if we are these badass women who are working,

0:29:07.760 --> 0:29:11.440
<v Speaker 2>you know, in jobs we love. We're doing big things,

0:29:11.480 --> 0:29:14.880
<v Speaker 2>we're making big moves. So I'm constantly in this masculine

0:29:15.000 --> 0:29:16.720
<v Speaker 2>energy where I'm getting shit done.

0:29:16.960 --> 0:29:19.240
<v Speaker 3>So it is hard for me to turn off.

0:29:19.360 --> 0:29:22.360
<v Speaker 2>But what I've realized is when I can switch and

0:29:22.400 --> 0:29:26.560
<v Speaker 2>I can be in this softer, more feminine, receiving energy.

0:29:26.640 --> 0:29:27.960
<v Speaker 3>I literally get the best.

0:29:27.720 --> 0:29:31.200
<v Speaker 2>Of both world because I'm in the power during the day,

0:29:31.440 --> 0:29:35.400
<v Speaker 2>I'm doing the thing, I'm killing my goals. I'm allowed

0:29:35.440 --> 0:29:38.600
<v Speaker 2>to be that person and like I chose him for

0:29:38.720 --> 0:29:41.760
<v Speaker 2>a reason. He compliments me. He is someone who loves

0:29:41.800 --> 0:29:44.440
<v Speaker 2>to look after me. Like he does all the house jobs,

0:29:44.800 --> 0:29:47.480
<v Speaker 2>he washes up, he does the garbage, he does that,

0:29:47.800 --> 0:29:52.080
<v Speaker 2>and he loves it. That's him, Yes, And so it's

0:29:52.120 --> 0:29:54.720
<v Speaker 2>like I need to sit in that receivership role and

0:29:54.760 --> 0:29:58.239
<v Speaker 2>it's and that's such a small little example, but you

0:29:58.280 --> 0:30:03.040
<v Speaker 2>can imagine if me towards Tim have all these constant

0:30:03.280 --> 0:30:06.280
<v Speaker 2>you know, emasculating and I don't realize I'm doing it.

0:30:06.600 --> 0:30:09.880
<v Speaker 2>But if we have these constant emasculating things, he's going

0:30:09.960 --> 0:30:10.680
<v Speaker 2>to stop trying.

0:30:10.880 --> 0:30:13.320
<v Speaker 1>He's going to be like and that's the thing. So

0:30:13.520 --> 0:30:16.240
<v Speaker 1>and this is the issue, Georgia. Yet so your example,

0:30:16.320 --> 0:30:20.440
<v Speaker 1>that is a perfect example where your trauma response is

0:30:20.480 --> 0:30:22.920
<v Speaker 1>to be a control freak because it makes you feel

0:30:23.000 --> 0:30:26.400
<v Speaker 1>safer because especially and this used to be me as well.

0:30:26.440 --> 0:30:27.960
<v Speaker 1>I've not but always been like this. I used to

0:30:28.000 --> 0:30:29.440
<v Speaker 1>be for anyone that doesn't know, I used to be

0:30:29.480 --> 0:30:33.160
<v Speaker 1>super masculine, fucking control freak, huge masculine armor. My dad

0:30:33.200 --> 0:30:36.360
<v Speaker 1>was emotionally unavailable. So therefore I just like shut down.

0:30:36.400 --> 0:30:39.200
<v Speaker 1>I was just like cold as fuck. And we go

0:30:39.320 --> 0:30:42.400
<v Speaker 1>into the control freak because it makes us feel safer

0:30:42.760 --> 0:30:45.520
<v Speaker 1>if we know what's going on, if we're in control,

0:30:45.720 --> 0:30:48.880
<v Speaker 1>we get an illusion of safety, right, It's it's an illusion.

0:30:49.480 --> 0:30:52.120
<v Speaker 1>And at the same time, yeah, what you did, like

0:30:52.160 --> 0:30:56.200
<v Speaker 1>you said, is he got the message if she doesn't

0:30:56.240 --> 0:30:59.880
<v Speaker 1>trust me, and that is that ruins a man because

0:31:00.520 --> 0:31:03.800
<v Speaker 1>trust is everything. If you say these three words I

0:31:03.920 --> 0:31:07.520
<v Speaker 1>trust you to a man, it's like he's dead. He's like,

0:31:07.600 --> 0:31:10.080
<v Speaker 1>I'm done marrying me. How my baby is right? Those

0:31:10.120 --> 0:31:13.800
<v Speaker 1>three words are magic to him. When when you trust

0:31:13.880 --> 0:31:15.560
<v Speaker 1>him and when you respect them.

0:31:15.600 --> 0:31:18.920
<v Speaker 2>Sorry, Monica, sorry to introduct again, but that's also like

0:31:18.960 --> 0:31:21.320
<v Speaker 2>a huge thing. And I feel like this is almost

0:31:21.360 --> 0:31:23.840
<v Speaker 2>just a fucking coaching session for me. But that's a

0:31:23.920 --> 0:31:28.080
<v Speaker 2>huge huston in our relationship because I am the breadwinner

0:31:28.120 --> 0:31:32.040
<v Speaker 2>because I am so when my masculine like Tim.

0:31:31.800 --> 0:31:33.560
<v Speaker 3>It's like I've got to throw him a bone.

0:31:33.600 --> 0:31:37.040
<v Speaker 2>I've got to you know, kind of meet him halfway,

0:31:37.240 --> 0:31:41.560
<v Speaker 2>because otherwise you can imagine him being like, what's even

0:31:41.640 --> 0:31:43.440
<v Speaker 2>the point of me in this relationship?

0:31:43.600 --> 0:31:45.440
<v Speaker 1>Correct? You know at that point?

0:31:45.920 --> 0:31:47.240
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, exactly so.

0:31:47.720 --> 0:31:51.240
<v Speaker 2>And that's like I said, like I think it's definitely

0:31:51.600 --> 0:31:54.360
<v Speaker 2>at the start, it's like you want to be independent,

0:31:54.440 --> 0:31:56.560
<v Speaker 2>you want to be in control, you want to have

0:31:56.680 --> 0:32:00.480
<v Speaker 2>those feelings. But once you realize you can actually switch,

0:32:00.640 --> 0:32:03.240
<v Speaker 2>and this is the biggest thing for me is once

0:32:03.400 --> 0:32:06.880
<v Speaker 2>it clicked that it's like, oh, I can actually switch

0:32:07.000 --> 0:32:11.840
<v Speaker 2>between these energies and have a very fulfilled, you know,

0:32:12.040 --> 0:32:16.480
<v Speaker 2>life and day and feel really good. It's not like

0:32:16.720 --> 0:32:21.160
<v Speaker 2>because I sit in receivership role with Tim in the

0:32:21.240 --> 0:32:24.880
<v Speaker 2>afternoon with dinner, that I'm not this boss independent woman,

0:32:24.960 --> 0:32:26.600
<v Speaker 2>Like we need to change that thinking.

0:32:26.920 --> 0:32:29.560
<v Speaker 1>You get to be both one thousand million percent, and

0:32:30.200 --> 0:32:32.520
<v Speaker 1>you can be a boss woman and you're not necessarily

0:32:32.600 --> 0:32:35.560
<v Speaker 1>a masculine boss woman, like I make a lot more money.

0:32:35.600 --> 0:32:38.040
<v Speaker 1>Like I said before, I'm similar to you Georgie that

0:32:38.120 --> 0:32:40.000
<v Speaker 1>I'm working all day, but I do it for my

0:32:40.080 --> 0:32:43.720
<v Speaker 1>feminine So people never think that I'm like some like

0:32:43.760 --> 0:32:47.000
<v Speaker 1>psycho hustler boss woman because I don't portray that energy

0:32:47.040 --> 0:32:49.400
<v Speaker 1>at all. And what you said before of like when

0:32:49.440 --> 0:32:52.800
<v Speaker 1>you emasculate enough, they stop trying. That is the issue.

0:32:53.120 --> 0:32:56.800
<v Speaker 1>So you go all these high flying ceo women that

0:32:56.880 --> 0:32:59.680
<v Speaker 1>are like I just want a man that knows chivalry rrah.

0:33:00.280 --> 0:33:04.320
<v Speaker 1>But the reason why men have stopped is because these women,

0:33:04.560 --> 0:33:06.080
<v Speaker 1>and I used to be one of them. I'm not

0:33:06.160 --> 0:33:07.800
<v Speaker 1>saying I'm perfect. I used to be one of them,

0:33:08.240 --> 0:33:11.240
<v Speaker 1>would bash them down for so long they're like, I

0:33:11.320 --> 0:33:16.280
<v Speaker 1>give up, Like you know the way that I show

0:33:16.360 --> 0:33:20.240
<v Speaker 1>up now for men, I and you and people doing

0:33:20.240 --> 0:33:22.400
<v Speaker 1>this work. We are now the one in a million

0:33:22.400 --> 0:33:26.600
<v Speaker 1>of women. So when you're now encountering a man and

0:33:26.640 --> 0:33:28.560
<v Speaker 1>you want him to lead, you actually have to like

0:33:28.680 --> 0:33:30.760
<v Speaker 1>really make that clear to him because a lot of

0:33:30.800 --> 0:33:33.920
<v Speaker 1>them won't know because they have been suppressed so much

0:33:33.960 --> 0:33:37.000
<v Speaker 1>by women that they don't understand that they can be

0:33:37.080 --> 0:33:39.440
<v Speaker 1>that forward with you and that you'll receive that. So

0:33:39.520 --> 0:33:41.520
<v Speaker 1>you have to be careful that, like, if you bash

0:33:41.520 --> 0:33:44.600
<v Speaker 1>a man down enough here, one thousand percent will start trying.

0:33:44.600 --> 0:33:46.440
<v Speaker 1>And a lot of women complain about this of like

0:33:46.640 --> 0:33:48.640
<v Speaker 1>we don't have date night anymore. I have to plan

0:33:48.720 --> 0:33:50.600
<v Speaker 1>all the dates X, Y, and Z. And I'm like, well,

0:33:50.600 --> 0:33:53.239
<v Speaker 1>that's not necessarily his fault. It's probably your fault. And

0:33:53.240 --> 0:33:56.640
<v Speaker 1>that can be really triggering for women to be like, wait,

0:33:56.720 --> 0:34:00.640
<v Speaker 1>it's my fault. And it's like yeah, because you're the women,

0:34:00.720 --> 0:34:03.880
<v Speaker 1>are the ones putting them down, and then we need

0:34:03.920 --> 0:34:05.120
<v Speaker 1>to empower them again.

0:34:05.320 --> 0:34:10.200
<v Speaker 2>And that's what Tim Okay, sorry you go yeah, yeah, sorry.

0:34:10.640 --> 0:34:14.200
<v Speaker 2>Tim's like, this is why you winged that we never

0:34:14.480 --> 0:34:17.480
<v Speaker 2>have day nights or anything. And he's like, this is why.

0:34:17.239 --> 0:34:17.960
<v Speaker 1>Tim needs to come.

0:34:19.800 --> 0:34:22.320
<v Speaker 3>Literally, he would fucking love this conversation.

0:34:23.080 --> 0:34:28.640
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, well, I've only got my monica my batteries on

0:34:28.760 --> 0:34:31.520
<v Speaker 2>Lake Low, and I haven't got my Childet's at the warehouse.

0:34:31.960 --> 0:34:35.480
<v Speaker 2>So the last sort of five minutes, can you kind

0:34:35.520 --> 0:34:38.680
<v Speaker 2>of wrap up and just chat to the audience about

0:34:39.360 --> 0:34:42.480
<v Speaker 2>And I also think this is a bigger conversation about

0:34:42.760 --> 0:34:47.879
<v Speaker 2>feminine and masculine imbalances in yourself, in your partner. So

0:34:48.160 --> 0:34:50.640
<v Speaker 2>give us just a little kind of wrap up. If

0:34:50.680 --> 0:34:55.239
<v Speaker 2>you're feeling over masculine, you know, what should you do

0:34:55.400 --> 0:34:59.359
<v Speaker 2>in your relationship? But maybe there is other people who

0:35:00.080 --> 0:35:03.560
<v Speaker 2>they want their partner to be, you know, more masculine,

0:35:03.600 --> 0:35:06.080
<v Speaker 2>to step in that role more like, how do they

0:35:06.120 --> 0:35:08.279
<v Speaker 2>ask their partner? How do they talk to them about that?

0:35:08.360 --> 0:35:12.120
<v Speaker 1>Okay, so both So yeah, there is so much to

0:35:12.160 --> 0:35:15.160
<v Speaker 1>this argument and no argument conversation, and I do have

0:35:15.239 --> 0:35:17.240
<v Speaker 1>a lot of resources. I would go over my stuff

0:35:17.280 --> 0:35:20.920
<v Speaker 1>to check it out. So if you are feeling over masculine,

0:35:21.000 --> 0:35:23.080
<v Speaker 1>a lot of women think, okay, I need to do

0:35:23.160 --> 0:35:25.680
<v Speaker 1>more feminine things. No, no, no, because that doing give more

0:35:25.680 --> 0:35:28.400
<v Speaker 1>feminine things is actually masculine. What you need to do

0:35:28.480 --> 0:35:30.759
<v Speaker 1>is you need to take things off your plate. You

0:35:30.800 --> 0:35:33.799
<v Speaker 1>need to slow down, you need to surrender more. You

0:35:33.840 --> 0:35:37.360
<v Speaker 1>need to take away the masculine, not try and shove

0:35:37.480 --> 0:35:40.360
<v Speaker 1>in the feminine things to be doing. Don'tru don't start

0:35:40.400 --> 0:35:43.399
<v Speaker 1>trying to shove in bath nights. If that's actually like

0:35:44.040 --> 0:35:45.520
<v Speaker 1>annoying and you're like, no, I just want to watch

0:35:45.560 --> 0:35:48.400
<v Speaker 1>Netflix and chill, then take away things don't shove in

0:35:48.640 --> 0:35:50.799
<v Speaker 1>feminine things to be doing. That would be a tip

0:35:50.880 --> 0:35:52.960
<v Speaker 1>number one that I would give people that are feeling

0:35:53.080 --> 0:35:56.680
<v Speaker 1>very masculine, and then just focus on letting go is

0:35:56.680 --> 0:35:58.400
<v Speaker 1>what you really want to focus on when you're like

0:35:58.480 --> 0:36:01.239
<v Speaker 1>in that hyper masculine. And I also want to say

0:36:01.280 --> 0:36:04.040
<v Speaker 1>that for majority of women, they actually need to heal

0:36:04.080 --> 0:36:08.240
<v Speaker 1>their relationship with the masculine within themselves and with men

0:36:08.840 --> 0:36:11.680
<v Speaker 1>in order for them to surrender to the masculine. Because

0:36:11.680 --> 0:36:14.279
<v Speaker 1>if you don't feel safe to let the masculine lead,

0:36:15.080 --> 0:36:17.400
<v Speaker 1>you won't let the masculine lead and you will not

0:36:17.440 --> 0:36:19.799
<v Speaker 1>be in your feminine. So a lot of the time,

0:36:19.800 --> 0:36:22.960
<v Speaker 1>it's not about you needing to firstly go and be feminine.

0:36:23.200 --> 0:36:25.719
<v Speaker 1>You need to firstly heal your relationship with men and

0:36:25.760 --> 0:36:28.680
<v Speaker 1>the masculine and then do the femine stuff afterwards. And

0:36:28.719 --> 0:36:31.840
<v Speaker 1>then in terms of speaking to your partner about this

0:36:31.920 --> 0:36:34.919
<v Speaker 1>and getting him to lead, if you are like, yes,

0:36:35.040 --> 0:36:39.320
<v Speaker 1>I actually can receive this and you're not kidding yourself,

0:36:39.800 --> 0:36:41.879
<v Speaker 1>then I would say to your partner something like, maybe

0:36:41.880 --> 0:36:44.279
<v Speaker 1>you need to start with apologizing, like babe, and I

0:36:44.280 --> 0:36:46.560
<v Speaker 1>always say to people just blame it on the podcast, Babe,

0:36:46.560 --> 0:36:49.160
<v Speaker 1>I listen to this podcast today. I've realized I've been

0:36:49.160 --> 0:36:52.799
<v Speaker 1>emasculating you so much. I am so sorry, and I

0:36:52.880 --> 0:36:56.239
<v Speaker 1>want to give you permission to call me out when

0:36:56.280 --> 0:36:58.520
<v Speaker 1>i'm doing it again, because I need to relearn this

0:36:58.600 --> 0:37:00.719
<v Speaker 1>because I don't know when I'm doing it, and I'm

0:37:00.760 --> 0:37:03.040
<v Speaker 1>going to need you. I'm going to count on you

0:37:03.440 --> 0:37:05.240
<v Speaker 1>to help to like wake me up to this stuff,

0:37:05.239 --> 0:37:07.319
<v Speaker 1>like can you do that for me? He'll be like

0:37:07.360 --> 0:37:09.960
<v Speaker 1>He'll probably be like fuck yeah, like thank fucking Jesus.

0:37:10.320 --> 0:37:12.160
<v Speaker 1>And then the second thing that I'd be saying to

0:37:12.200 --> 0:37:15.279
<v Speaker 1>get him to lead would be like, m that was

0:37:15.320 --> 0:37:18.360
<v Speaker 1>a weird word. Um, not not what that word it

0:37:18.400 --> 0:37:21.160
<v Speaker 1>was that I said. I would be saying something on

0:37:21.200 --> 0:37:25.760
<v Speaker 1>the lines of honey, I love when you are in

0:37:25.840 --> 0:37:29.279
<v Speaker 1>that provider role. When I come home and you've like

0:37:29.400 --> 0:37:31.520
<v Speaker 1>planned a date night, You're telling me what to wear.

0:37:32.040 --> 0:37:34.719
<v Speaker 1>You want to just ravish me, and you've like taken control.

0:37:35.040 --> 0:37:37.600
<v Speaker 1>I know sometimes that I can maybe resist your control,

0:37:37.640 --> 0:37:39.080
<v Speaker 1>but fuck, I just want you to know it is

0:37:39.080 --> 0:37:43.120
<v Speaker 1>so sexy to me, and I really, I really want

0:37:43.160 --> 0:37:44.520
<v Speaker 1>you to know that a lot of wanting you to

0:37:44.520 --> 0:37:46.040
<v Speaker 1>know is changed out of my head. I really want

0:37:46.040 --> 0:37:50.880
<v Speaker 1>you to know that I love when you lead and

0:37:50.960 --> 0:37:53.960
<v Speaker 1>it makes me feel so looked after. So I am

0:37:54.040 --> 0:37:57.279
<v Speaker 1>giving you full permission keyword, I am giving you permission

0:37:57.640 --> 0:38:00.799
<v Speaker 1>to take the lead more in our relationship, to plan

0:38:00.880 --> 0:38:03.560
<v Speaker 1>more dates, to boss me around in a sexy way,

0:38:03.600 --> 0:38:06.440
<v Speaker 1>by the way, that kind of stuff. That is how

0:38:06.480 --> 0:38:09.680
<v Speaker 1>I would say it. I am giving you permission to

0:38:09.760 --> 0:38:11.640
<v Speaker 1>be doing more of X, Y and Z. You want

0:38:11.680 --> 0:38:13.680
<v Speaker 1>to encourage, man, you don't want to say stop doing.

0:38:14.080 --> 0:38:16.279
<v Speaker 1>You want to say that you like it when they

0:38:16.320 --> 0:38:19.959
<v Speaker 1>do abenc So really focus on praising when he takes

0:38:20.000 --> 0:38:23.239
<v Speaker 1>the lead, and it kind of brush away, not to

0:38:23.360 --> 0:38:25.680
<v Speaker 1>a boutive extent, but brush away when he does stuff

0:38:25.680 --> 0:38:28.040
<v Speaker 1>that you don't love. Focus on the things that he

0:38:28.160 --> 0:38:30.160
<v Speaker 1>does that you do love. Ah.

0:38:30.200 --> 0:38:31.080
<v Speaker 3>I love that.

0:38:31.080 --> 0:38:35.560
<v Speaker 2>That was perfect and I was taking notes. Well, thank

0:38:35.560 --> 0:38:37.239
<v Speaker 2>you so much, Monica. I am going to have to

0:38:37.239 --> 0:38:41.040
<v Speaker 2>write up this interview before my bloody computer dies. But

0:38:41.320 --> 0:38:44.279
<v Speaker 2>like Monica said, guys, she has so much information on this.

0:38:44.760 --> 0:38:47.440
<v Speaker 2>It's definitely like, if this is a triggering episode for you,

0:38:47.640 --> 0:38:50.000
<v Speaker 2>it means you need to deep dive and get into

0:38:50.040 --> 0:38:52.080
<v Speaker 2>it a bit more because it might be something that

0:38:52.480 --> 0:38:54.920
<v Speaker 2>really helps you. I know, for me, when I really

0:38:54.960 --> 0:38:59.160
<v Speaker 2>step into my feminine outside of work. Is I'm so

0:38:59.280 --> 0:39:03.160
<v Speaker 2>much more happy? Yeah, I'm so much more purposeful. And

0:39:03.680 --> 0:39:07.920
<v Speaker 2>I have really been focusing on this, like receiving energy,

0:39:08.040 --> 0:39:11.440
<v Speaker 2>especially you know with Tim and our relationship, and it's

0:39:11.480 --> 0:39:15.080
<v Speaker 2>like I'm definitely noticing such a huge difference where our

0:39:15.120 --> 0:39:18.840
<v Speaker 2>relationship is just a lot better and I can see

0:39:18.920 --> 0:39:24.560
<v Speaker 2>he really feels like he really feels appreciated and he

0:39:24.640 --> 0:39:27.400
<v Speaker 2>really feels like he's in his power, which you know

0:39:27.560 --> 0:39:31.279
<v Speaker 2>you want that in your relationship. So yeah, definitely look

0:39:31.320 --> 0:39:34.279
<v Speaker 2>into it. Thank you so much, Monica. I appreciate it.

0:39:34.320 --> 0:39:36.200
<v Speaker 2>I'm sure we'll have you on the show again look

0:39:36.200 --> 0:39:39.839
<v Speaker 2>about something else, but for for now, yeah, go check

0:39:39.880 --> 0:39:42.560
<v Speaker 2>Monica out. I'll put all the links in the show notes.

0:39:42.640 --> 0:39:46.120
<v Speaker 2>Thank you so much. Thank you, thank you for listening

0:39:46.160 --> 0:39:50.200
<v Speaker 2>for another RNC episode. I really appreciate taking the time

0:39:50.600 --> 0:39:53.040
<v Speaker 2>to be here with me and also for taking the

0:39:53.120 --> 0:39:57.080
<v Speaker 2>time for yourself. If you found this episode helpful, it

0:39:57.120 --> 0:39:59.680
<v Speaker 2>would be so amazing if you shared it on your

0:39:59.719 --> 0:40:02.560
<v Speaker 2>story ries and tagged us, or simply just send it

0:40:02.560 --> 0:40:05.840
<v Speaker 2>on to a girlfriend or family member who would benefit

0:40:05.880 --> 0:40:09.719
<v Speaker 2>from listening. We are an independent podcast run by me

0:40:09.960 --> 0:40:12.759
<v Speaker 2>and my amazing podcast manager, so it would mean the

0:40:12.840 --> 0:40:15.080
<v Speaker 2>world to us if you left a review on the

0:40:15.120 --> 0:40:19.319
<v Speaker 2>Apple podcast app. Also, if you're vibing this podcast and

0:40:19.360 --> 0:40:23.880
<v Speaker 2>the concepts we're chatting about, and your craving community, please

0:40:24.120 --> 0:40:27.200
<v Speaker 2>come and join us over at the RNC podcast community

0:40:27.320 --> 0:40:31.879
<v Speaker 2>Facebook group. Just search Rise and Conquer podcast community on

0:40:31.960 --> 0:40:35.040
<v Speaker 2>Facebook and I will be in there to chat to

0:40:35.040 --> 0:40:36.359
<v Speaker 2>you until next time.