WEBVTT - ASK UNCUT - Will the billboards please think of the children!

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<v Speaker 1>Life Uncut acknowledges the traditional custodians of country whose lands

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<v Speaker 1>were never seated. We pay our respects to their elders

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<v Speaker 1>past and present.

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<v Speaker 2>Always was, always will be Aboriginal Land. Hi, guys, and

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<v Speaker 2>a welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm Laura, I'm Brittany, and.

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<v Speaker 1>It's therapy Thursday, Therapy for whoy Thursday, and Laura is

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<v Speaker 1>still on drugs.

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<v Speaker 3>You are high as a kite.

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<v Speaker 1>Do you want to explain yourself turning up to this

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<v Speaker 1>podcast record on drugs?

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<v Speaker 2>I feel like that means a little bit of context,

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<v Speaker 2>And by context, I mean context if you listen to

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<v Speaker 2>Tuesday's episode, if you listened to last week's episode, I

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<v Speaker 2>had a colonoscopy, But it means that I've literally done

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<v Speaker 2>the three days of prep the cleanut, and then today

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<v Speaker 2>I was on anesthetics and I was off my face,

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<v Speaker 2>completely gone on another world, in another planet. I still

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<v Speaker 2>feel like I'm there.

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<v Speaker 3>How do you feel?

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<v Speaker 1>Because it has been a long time coming, and I've

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<v Speaker 1>been on your mind and we've all known it's coming,

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<v Speaker 1>But what was it like for you to.

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<v Speaker 3>Actually go in, pull your pants down, know you're about

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<v Speaker 3>to get nude? Have them drugged, Like, what was the team? Like,

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<v Speaker 3>what was your experience?

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<v Speaker 1>Like?

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<v Speaker 2>I was surprised by how much of a medical procedure

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<v Speaker 2>it was. I was like, oh, yeah, they're just just

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<v Speaker 2>gonna whip a little camera up there to we all done,

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<v Speaker 2>and we find it was a proper hospital.

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<v Speaker 3>Now you're in like an operating theater.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, I was not prepared. But also, let me just

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<v Speaker 2>tell you this, I had the best five hours sleep

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<v Speaker 2>of my entire life. I came home from that colonoscopy.

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<v Speaker 2>I went back to bed, and I don't think i've

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<v Speaker 2>for three years since having children, I don't think I've

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<v Speaker 2>ever slept like that. I woke up and I didn't

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<v Speaker 2>know where I was. I didn't know what was going on.

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<v Speaker 2>I just felt really heavy, and the nurse was kind

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<v Speaker 2>of like lightly shaking me to wake me up, and

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<v Speaker 2>I rolled over and I kind of put my arm

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<v Speaker 2>on her face and I was like, honey, get me

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<v Speaker 2>a blanket. I'm cold, because I thought it was mad.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh god, it was eighteen months, two years ago now

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<v Speaker 1>when I froze my eggs. But I have the funniest

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<v Speaker 1>videos from that, and I remember when I was coming

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<v Speaker 1>out of the anesthetic, I thought in my head that

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<v Speaker 1>I was completely fine, So I thought I was normal,

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<v Speaker 1>and so I was like, I'll do an update.

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<v Speaker 3>I'll send some updates to the family.

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<v Speaker 1>So I was recording this update to my family group

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<v Speaker 1>chat about how the procedure went and how many eggs

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<v Speaker 1>I got, and when you play that back, it is

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<v Speaker 1>wild that they were in hysterics, and I was like,

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<v Speaker 1>why is everyone laughing? I genuinely thought I was giving

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<v Speaker 1>a Ted talk to like a thousand people, but I

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<v Speaker 1>was like.

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<v Speaker 3>I have thean eggs guys.

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, that's how I was talking. But in

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<v Speaker 1>my head, I was like, that was a great Ted talk.

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<v Speaker 2>I actually remember you doing stories shortly afterwards, and I

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<v Speaker 2>was like, I'm pretty sure Britt is still she's offer

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<v Speaker 2>she said about a seven right now. There are still

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<v Speaker 2>a few brain cells missing. Yeah, So look at the

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<v Speaker 2>end of the day, to the people who wrote in

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<v Speaker 2>questions for this ask on cut, I'm very sorry. I

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<v Speaker 2>do feel like I have a little bit more cognitive

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<v Speaker 2>ability than what I did say five hours ago. But Britt,

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<v Speaker 2>you were doing the heavy lifting. And if I say

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<v Speaker 2>anything wildly out of tone or out of touch, let's

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<v Speaker 2>just blame it on the fact that I have not

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<v Speaker 2>eaten in three days and my colon is completely empty.

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<v Speaker 1>If you've turned up, you committed to the content, the project,

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<v Speaker 1>the Lifers.

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<v Speaker 3>You hear, you're ready, you're roaring well.

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<v Speaker 2>Speaking of the Lifers, we had possibly the most beautiful

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<v Speaker 2>story that was in our Facebook group this week and

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<v Speaker 2>we wanted to share it with you guys because we

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<v Speaker 2>know that you are a very special breed. We know

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<v Speaker 2>that we have such an incredible lifelun Cup community around us,

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<v Speaker 2>and this is one of the things that since this

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<v Speaker 2>podcast started we've been genuinely the most proud of. It's

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<v Speaker 2>just separate to the podcast. There's been this incredible community

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<v Speaker 2>of people that's formed, like obviously in support of the podcast,

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<v Speaker 2>but it's also just you guys have your own little

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<v Speaker 2>communities as well.

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<v Speaker 1>So if you're part of the discussion group, you may

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<v Speaker 1>have seen that there was a post. There was a

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<v Speaker 1>woman kell Dre and she posted on behalf of her friend.

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<v Speaker 1>This is what she said. I have a friend taking

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<v Speaker 1>her daughter to Germany for medical treatment. They are flying

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<v Speaker 1>into Dussoldoff. Now this is a long short but are

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<v Speaker 1>there any Life on Cup members who are in dussledoff

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<v Speaker 1>or have family or friends there, just so I can

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<v Speaker 1>tell her there is someone we can call on if

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<v Speaker 1>she gets lost, lost, confused, scared, oh needs help. So

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<v Speaker 1>this is what this woman posted on behalf of her

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<v Speaker 1>friend and then one of our top contributors, her name

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<v Speaker 1>is Julia, she commented, and she said, I live in Dusoldoff.

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<v Speaker 1>Now from this one comment, they've gone on to privately

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<v Speaker 1>DM like this wasn't a big thing happening in the group,

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<v Speaker 1>but they contact each other privately. They landed in Dusseldorff

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<v Speaker 1>and the little girl has a brain tumor, so she's

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<v Speaker 1>gone over to get this treatment over there, and they

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<v Speaker 1>don't speak The language was very, very confronting and confusing,

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<v Speaker 1>and Julia was on the ground this life and has

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<v Speaker 1>completely gone above and beyond out.

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<v Speaker 3>Of her way to help this family.

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<v Speaker 1>She's been translating, she's taken them out, she's gone to

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<v Speaker 1>dinner with them. She got an emergency call saying, they

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<v Speaker 1>want to give my daughter medication, but I don't know

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<v Speaker 1>what it is. I don't want to let them give

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<v Speaker 1>my daughter medication without knowing. And within fifteen minutes, Julia

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<v Speaker 1>was on a train. She went to the hospital. She

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<v Speaker 1>was translating for her. And I just think it's a

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<v Speaker 1>really really beautiful example of how you guys are going

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<v Speaker 1>above and beyond for each other. And it's not for praise,

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<v Speaker 1>and it's not to tell everyone that you've done it.

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<v Speaker 1>It's this was all a very private but these things

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<v Speaker 1>do not go unnoticed by us.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and they also don't go unnoticed by the Life

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<v Speaker 2>hung Cut community. If you're not part of the Facebook group,

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<v Speaker 2>it's a Life Uncut discussion group. There have been over

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<v Speaker 2>the years so many beautiful moments of connection that have

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<v Speaker 2>come out of that group. One of the things that

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<v Speaker 2>I think is so special and it's something that we

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<v Speaker 2>don't see enough of that it's something that absolutely exists

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<v Speaker 2>in the Life un Cut community is that sense of community.

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<v Speaker 2>And so to Julia for everything that you've done to

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<v Speaker 2>help out this family, just doing it out of the

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<v Speaker 2>kindness of your own heart. We are so grateful that

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<v Speaker 2>you are a Lifer and we love that you are

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<v Speaker 2>a part of the Facebook group and have been contributing

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<v Speaker 2>and just being an absolute ten out of ten five

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<v Speaker 2>star human.

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<v Speaker 1>This is like, by far, not the first time that

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<v Speaker 1>you guys as a group of Lifers have gone above

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<v Speaker 1>beyond for someone. I remember one of the big stories

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<v Speaker 1>was Dennis the Man, the elderly man last year that

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<v Speaker 1>was about to be kicked out of his home.

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<v Speaker 3>He had no family and friends and he was going

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<v Speaker 3>to be homeless.

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<v Speaker 1>And again purely because of you lot, you changed his life.

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<v Speaker 1>You found housing for him, you helped him move, he

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<v Speaker 1>had free removalists. You guys raise money for him.

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<v Speaker 3>You're on the news with him like it genuinely blows

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<v Speaker 3>our mind.

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<v Speaker 2>We love you, guys, and we appreciate everything that you

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<v Speaker 2>do for each other and also for the life on

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<v Speaker 2>cut community. Now, before we get into answering and giving

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<v Speaker 2>you out pearls of wisdom, there was something that happened

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<v Speaker 2>in the news recently and Britt, I wanted to talk

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<v Speaker 2>to you about it because I'm not sure how i

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<v Speaker 2>feel part of me, part of me again, I'm like

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<v Speaker 2>straddling this fence hard with this one. So in Perth,

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<v Speaker 2>there is a woman, her name is Savannah. She has

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<v Speaker 2>an OnlyFans account and she has decided to take out

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<v Speaker 2>She's commissioned because she is a savvy businesswoman, she has

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<v Speaker 2>commissioned a fuck off billboard ad that is promoting her

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<v Speaker 2>only fans account. Now it is a pitch sure of

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<v Speaker 2>her in a very seductive pose. She's wearing a little

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<v Speaker 2>black bikini. She's kind of like, what do you call

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<v Speaker 2>it when you're you've got your legs apart, Like you're

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<v Speaker 2>not kneeling, you're kind of leaning forward, but you're straddled.

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<v Speaker 2>She's straddling the beach. It's outside.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm finding the picture.

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<v Speaker 2>It's a very sensual and sexy photo. Although she has

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<v Speaker 2>a bikini on, so like you would see as much

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<v Speaker 2>flesh going down to Bono Beach on the weekend.

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<v Speaker 3>Okay, I've got it.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, Okay, we'll put a picture of it on our

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<v Speaker 2>install on Stories.

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<v Speaker 3>Let's provide her more.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it's definitely working. There's a huge QR code on

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<v Speaker 2>the billboard, so you can scan the QR code from

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<v Speaker 2>your phone when you're walking down the street and it

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<v Speaker 2>will take you straight to her only Fans account. There's

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<v Speaker 2>also her Instagram, it's linked to her Twitter. Every type

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<v Speaker 2>of social media platform where this OnlyFans model is available

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<v Speaker 2>and you can find her is linked on this billboard. Massive.

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<v Speaker 2>The thing is, there has been such uproar about this

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<v Speaker 2>from many concerned Perth citizens are upset by the fact

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<v Speaker 2>that there is this billboard and she has taken to

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<v Speaker 2>her saying, well, look, I'm promoting my business. I'm in

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<v Speaker 2>a bikini. Nobody's naked. People can use only fans for

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<v Speaker 2>all different things, like for cooking recipes. As much as

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<v Speaker 2>you could use it for hardcore porn, you could be

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<v Speaker 2>using it to, I don't know, teach someone how to

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<v Speaker 2>serve as a car. You can use it for a

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<v Speaker 2>whole spectrum of things. My question to you is, Britt,

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<v Speaker 2>what are your thoughts? Because I don't know how I feel.

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<v Speaker 2>Because the empowered feminist in me wants to say, you go, girl,

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<v Speaker 2>live your best life. But on the other side, the

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<v Speaker 2>mother in me thinks, won't somebody think of the children.

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<v Speaker 1>It's a hard one. I'm actually just on her Instagram

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<v Speaker 1>right now. As you were talking, I went on she

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<v Speaker 1>I looked at the promotion the billboard and I got

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<v Speaker 1>a handle and I'm on her Instagram.

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<v Speaker 3>There's a post from four minutes ago. Actually great, what

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<v Speaker 3>is that?

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<v Speaker 1>That says it's a picture of the billboard literally four

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<v Speaker 1>minutes ago, and it basically she's collabed posted with someone

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<v Speaker 1>and it says Savannah has been warned that the billboard

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<v Speaker 1>company will likely be issued a cease notice tomorrow from

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<v Speaker 1>local council. It then goes on to say, explain to me,

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<v Speaker 1>how now this is any different from an ad with

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<v Speaker 1>a huge naked man with his bulge in a pair

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<v Speaker 1>of undias for Calvin Klein or Kate Moss laying erotically

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<v Speaker 1>over Justin Bieber without his top on.

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<v Speaker 3>That's a pretty good point.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I think the problem here is I don't think

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<v Speaker 1>it's so much her and the picture as it is

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<v Speaker 1>the push to the only fans where obviously erotic videos

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<v Speaker 1>and photos are posted.

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<v Speaker 3>I think that might be the issue for a lot

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<v Speaker 3>of parents.

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<v Speaker 1>It's not so much just the photo, but it's like

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<v Speaker 1>there's a huge QR code that any kid could go

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<v Speaker 1>I guess could go and take a photo of.

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<v Speaker 2>And I think that it's incredibly black and white to say, well,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, Justin Bieber or whoever it is has a

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<v Speaker 2>bulge in their Calvin clients and then compare that to

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<v Speaker 2>an only fans ad, because at the end of the day,

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<v Speaker 2>if you click on the link for Calvin Clients, you're

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<v Speaker 2>going to go to an underwear site and you're gonna

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<v Speaker 2>buy some Nickers, which everybody needs. Very important product. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>but at the end of the day, only Fans is

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<v Speaker 2>a very different type of site. And I understand that,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, people have and use it for many, many

0:09:57.600 --> 0:10:00.240
<v Speaker 2>different things, but we can't ignore the fact that a

0:10:00.240 --> 0:10:02.880
<v Speaker 2>lot of people do use it for very sexually explicit

0:10:02.960 --> 0:10:06.440
<v Speaker 2>stuff as well. And is that an issue, Absolutely not,

0:10:07.000 --> 0:10:09.280
<v Speaker 2>But there needs to be some protection from children. And

0:10:09.320 --> 0:10:11.640
<v Speaker 2>I guess I read this article that it's been reported

0:10:11.640 --> 0:10:13.760
<v Speaker 2>now and seven News has done an article on it.

0:10:13.840 --> 0:10:17.200
<v Speaker 2>BBC is covering it because it does bring up a

0:10:17.200 --> 0:10:20.079
<v Speaker 2>lot of questions like why is one acceptable? Why is

0:10:20.120 --> 0:10:22.640
<v Speaker 2>it okay to have a woman in lingerie but then

0:10:22.760 --> 0:10:25.120
<v Speaker 2>not have savvy business woman who's trying to promote her

0:10:25.160 --> 0:10:28.160
<v Speaker 2>only fans, who's also simply just in launderie. And I

0:10:28.160 --> 0:10:30.800
<v Speaker 2>guess for me as a parent, the thing that where

0:10:30.840 --> 0:10:33.520
<v Speaker 2>my brain goes to is as a parent, it's your

0:10:33.520 --> 0:10:36.719
<v Speaker 2>responsibility to try and limit your children from what they

0:10:36.760 --> 0:10:39.360
<v Speaker 2>can and can't see, right Like you try and protect

0:10:39.400 --> 0:10:42.040
<v Speaker 2>your children from pawn sites, You try and protect your

0:10:42.120 --> 0:10:45.439
<v Speaker 2>children from knowing that only fans exist up until a

0:10:45.480 --> 0:10:47.840
<v Speaker 2>certain age. You try and protect your children from so

0:10:47.960 --> 0:10:50.840
<v Speaker 2>many different types of things. And when it comes to

0:10:51.160 --> 0:10:53.760
<v Speaker 2>a phone, you're responsible for that. When it comes to

0:10:53.800 --> 0:10:57.520
<v Speaker 2>what they're consuming in magazines, you're responsible for that. But

0:10:57.559 --> 0:10:59.720
<v Speaker 2>when it comes to them walking out of their house,

0:11:00.080 --> 0:11:01.559
<v Speaker 2>walking down their street, what are you going to do?

0:11:01.640 --> 0:11:05.160
<v Speaker 2>Blindfold them? You can't protect somebody from that. And I

0:11:05.160 --> 0:11:08.160
<v Speaker 2>guess ultimately, even though there is many because like if

0:11:08.200 --> 0:11:10.719
<v Speaker 2>you scan that QR code, you have to I think

0:11:10.760 --> 0:11:12.840
<v Speaker 2>with only fans you have to submit like a license

0:11:12.880 --> 0:11:15.200
<v Speaker 2>to be able to actually prove that you're eighteen.

0:11:15.600 --> 0:11:18.160
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, you don't scan it and go straight to the

0:11:18.320 --> 0:11:21.000
<v Speaker 1>nudes or whatever, Like you don't get straight in from scanning.

0:11:21.280 --> 0:11:25.000
<v Speaker 2>No, there's definitely layers of having to prove that you're

0:11:25.040 --> 0:11:27.240
<v Speaker 2>over eighteen in order to be able to create a

0:11:27.280 --> 0:11:30.120
<v Speaker 2>subscription to be able to view content. But I mean,

0:11:30.120 --> 0:11:32.560
<v Speaker 2>we'd be silly to think that some kids aren't savvy

0:11:32.640 --> 0:11:35.520
<v Speaker 2>enough to be able to do that. Now, is this

0:11:35.640 --> 0:11:38.480
<v Speaker 2>Savannah woman, like, is she the reason why children are

0:11:38.520 --> 0:11:40.679
<v Speaker 2>going to get on and look at OnlyFans? No. I

0:11:40.679 --> 0:11:42.840
<v Speaker 2>would say a lot of kids already know what exists,

0:11:42.840 --> 0:11:44.480
<v Speaker 2>and if they really want to look at someone, they're

0:11:44.480 --> 0:11:47.079
<v Speaker 2>going to do it. But I do think that promoting

0:11:47.080 --> 0:11:50.280
<v Speaker 2>it so publicly could be more of initial it's like

0:11:50.280 --> 0:11:51.520
<v Speaker 2>bringing it front of mine.

0:11:51.559 --> 0:11:54.520
<v Speaker 1>I'm on the fans Because there's a big part that's like, fuck,

0:11:54.640 --> 0:11:57.920
<v Speaker 1>she's just nailed the marketing for her business, because it's business, So.

0:11:57.920 --> 0:12:01.200
<v Speaker 3>You're like, go off, queen. Yes, it's like that. No

0:12:01.200 --> 0:12:02.319
<v Speaker 3>one in Australia's ever done that.

0:12:02.320 --> 0:12:03.719
<v Speaker 1>I don't know if anyone around the world has put

0:12:03.720 --> 0:12:05.000
<v Speaker 1>their only fans on a billboard.

0:12:05.040 --> 0:12:07.120
<v Speaker 3>So there's part of you that's like, fucking get a queen.

0:12:07.200 --> 0:12:09.120
<v Speaker 1>Then there's the other part that like, if I were

0:12:09.160 --> 0:12:11.760
<v Speaker 1>a mum and my four year old is driving along

0:12:11.800 --> 0:12:13.520
<v Speaker 1>and says, what's only fans? I don't want to have

0:12:13.559 --> 0:12:15.800
<v Speaker 1>that conversation yet. So there's a part of me that's like,

0:12:16.200 --> 0:12:18.719
<v Speaker 1>is it the right place to do the marketing? It's

0:12:18.760 --> 0:12:19.440
<v Speaker 1>a tough one.

0:12:19.600 --> 0:12:21.720
<v Speaker 2>There is nothing wrong with it as a business and

0:12:21.800 --> 0:12:23.839
<v Speaker 2>as a site, and there's nothing wrong with wanting to

0:12:23.880 --> 0:12:26.240
<v Speaker 2>promote it, but I do think that there needs to

0:12:26.280 --> 0:12:29.160
<v Speaker 2>be appropriate places in which you're promote it. And I

0:12:29.240 --> 0:12:31.800
<v Speaker 2>also think it's important to know, like none of us

0:12:31.880 --> 0:12:35.280
<v Speaker 2>have seen what is inside this only Fans account? Is

0:12:35.320 --> 0:12:38.840
<v Speaker 2>it just photos in a bikini? Is it something that's

0:12:38.880 --> 0:12:42.040
<v Speaker 2>more sexually explicit? Like what are you subscribing.

0:12:41.440 --> 0:12:44.920
<v Speaker 1>To I mean, her Instagram's very sexy and the link

0:12:44.960 --> 0:12:47.320
<v Speaker 1>says go here for the good stuff. I'm going to

0:12:47.400 --> 0:12:49.320
<v Speaker 1>assume that there's some pretty sexy stuff on there.

0:12:49.360 --> 0:12:50.840
<v Speaker 3>That's an assumption. I haven't been on there.

0:12:50.880 --> 0:12:53.120
<v Speaker 1>But at the end of the day, yeah, I'm not

0:12:53.160 --> 0:12:55.679
<v Speaker 1>convinced the school run is the place to put.

0:12:55.480 --> 0:12:56.240
<v Speaker 3>The billboard on.

0:12:56.880 --> 0:12:59.240
<v Speaker 2>If dad is doing the school run, he might be

0:12:59.320 --> 0:13:00.160
<v Speaker 2>okay with it.

0:13:00.240 --> 0:13:02.160
<v Speaker 3>Oh fucking clever, man. I don't know how.

0:13:02.160 --> 0:13:03.640
<v Speaker 1>No one else has thought of this, And like she's

0:13:03.679 --> 0:13:06.920
<v Speaker 1>on every article ever, lad Bible News, Perth News, Astrailing,

0:13:07.080 --> 0:13:09.560
<v Speaker 1>Everyone's currently talking about it, so she's nailed it.

0:13:09.840 --> 0:13:12.320
<v Speaker 2>I just can't believe that the Billboard company actually let

0:13:12.400 --> 0:13:15.160
<v Speaker 2>this fly because there are so many rules around advertising,

0:13:15.240 --> 0:13:17.319
<v Speaker 2>say like porn sites or porn harb or any of

0:13:17.360 --> 0:13:19.840
<v Speaker 2>those sorts of sites that require you to be over

0:13:19.880 --> 0:13:23.320
<v Speaker 2>eighteen to view. There is so much legislation about publicly

0:13:23.360 --> 0:13:26.800
<v Speaker 2>advertising them. You can't so I wonder how this slips

0:13:26.840 --> 0:13:29.080
<v Speaker 2>through the cracks, And I think it is because it

0:13:29.120 --> 0:13:32.160
<v Speaker 2>flirts with that very blurred line between what is too

0:13:32.240 --> 0:13:34.480
<v Speaker 2>sexual for the school run.

0:13:34.640 --> 0:13:35.080
<v Speaker 3>Literally.

0:13:35.360 --> 0:13:37.240
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, all right, well, I'm gonna give you an update

0:13:37.240 --> 0:13:38.000
<v Speaker 1>on my life.

0:13:38.200 --> 0:13:40.680
<v Speaker 3>I'm still best friends with the gay guys next.

0:13:40.520 --> 0:13:43.360
<v Speaker 1>Door, Alex and Eugene. They're amazing. I went for a

0:13:43.400 --> 0:13:45.480
<v Speaker 1>dinner party last night and they bought me a present.

0:13:45.559 --> 0:13:47.280
<v Speaker 1>Let me show you the present, Laura. I'm just gonna

0:13:47.280 --> 0:13:47.560
<v Speaker 1>get it.

0:13:47.800 --> 0:13:49.959
<v Speaker 2>I've lost Brittany to a sixty year old psychic.

0:13:51.160 --> 0:13:54.560
<v Speaker 1>Okay, they were so excited to give me this present,

0:13:54.600 --> 0:13:57.000
<v Speaker 1>and now I need to tell you. Alex and Eugene

0:13:57.160 --> 0:14:00.000
<v Speaker 1>the couple, right So Alex, he walks around the head

0:14:00.120 --> 0:14:03.359
<v Speaker 1>us now and sporadically we'll go lifos.

0:14:03.840 --> 0:14:06.640
<v Speaker 3>He's calls himself a lifer. He listens to the podcast now.

0:14:07.000 --> 0:14:10.319
<v Speaker 1>He knows everything he knows about you, Laura, Matty, j Keisha.

0:14:10.520 --> 0:14:13.200
<v Speaker 1>He's so involved in the podcast and he's absolutely loving it.

0:14:13.360 --> 0:14:15.720
<v Speaker 1>Eugene not so much. He's like, I get what Alex

0:14:15.720 --> 0:14:17.880
<v Speaker 1>tells me. He's like, Alex made me listen to some episodes,

0:14:17.920 --> 0:14:19.000
<v Speaker 1>but he's not that tech.

0:14:18.880 --> 0:14:20.960
<v Speaker 2>Sabby, Eugene, I'm not your target market.

0:14:21.280 --> 0:14:23.040
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I mean Alex had to download a podcas he

0:14:23.040 --> 0:14:24.760
<v Speaker 1>didn't even know how download the podcast app. But he's

0:14:24.800 --> 0:14:26.800
<v Speaker 1>our main subscriber now. But they were so excited to

0:14:26.800 --> 0:14:27.600
<v Speaker 1>give me this present.

0:14:28.440 --> 0:14:31.480
<v Speaker 3>Have a lot. It's a pair of socks and this says.

0:14:31.680 --> 0:14:37.840
<v Speaker 1>Bitch, I am reality TV. This is the present they

0:14:37.880 --> 0:14:40.200
<v Speaker 1>gave me. I'm gonna put on life on cut stories.

0:14:40.240 --> 0:14:41.640
<v Speaker 1>But it's really cute.

0:14:41.680 --> 0:14:43.400
<v Speaker 3>Anyway, I had my psychic reading.

0:14:43.440 --> 0:14:46.320
<v Speaker 1>I've only just had it, so I need time to

0:14:46.880 --> 0:14:50.120
<v Speaker 1>go through that and process that and we'll talk about

0:14:50.160 --> 0:14:53.400
<v Speaker 1>it well, unpacking a bit more on Tuesday's big episode,

0:14:53.480 --> 0:14:57.040
<v Speaker 1>because he did mention like you Laura make Jay mentioned

0:14:57.160 --> 0:14:59.520
<v Speaker 1>Mitch like. There was a lot of stuff that was mentioned.

0:14:59.720 --> 0:15:01.040
<v Speaker 1>I'm not going to go through all of it. Some

0:15:01.080 --> 0:15:02.760
<v Speaker 1>of it was pretty personal, but I'll give you my

0:15:02.880 --> 0:15:04.920
<v Speaker 1>thoughts about that one once I've unpacked it a bit

0:15:04.920 --> 0:15:05.520
<v Speaker 1>more myself.

0:15:05.800 --> 0:15:07.240
<v Speaker 2>And I mean, we all know how much of an

0:15:07.320 --> 0:15:09.600
<v Speaker 2>absolute skeptic I am for it, So I can't wait

0:15:09.640 --> 0:15:12.000
<v Speaker 2>to sit there and be like, I'm sure that he

0:15:12.080 --> 0:15:15.080
<v Speaker 2>read this on the internet. Before we get into answering

0:15:15.120 --> 0:15:17.440
<v Speaker 2>asking cut questions, what are you vibing this week?

0:15:17.560 --> 0:15:21.440
<v Speaker 3>Oh? Okay, I am. It's no secret that I love

0:15:21.520 --> 0:15:22.280
<v Speaker 3>Lewis Capaldi.

0:15:22.360 --> 0:15:25.960
<v Speaker 1>My vibe this week is Lewis Capaldi's Netflix documentary, which

0:15:26.160 --> 0:15:29.800
<v Speaker 1>is literally titled Lewis Capaldi How I'm Feeling Now? I mean,

0:15:29.840 --> 0:15:32.120
<v Speaker 1>I love him as an artist, I love him as

0:15:32.200 --> 0:15:35.240
<v Speaker 1>just so raw and authentic on his Instagram, But it

0:15:35.400 --> 0:15:37.840
<v Speaker 1>was really around his mental health.

0:15:37.960 --> 0:15:39.600
<v Speaker 3>And I don't know if a lot of people have

0:15:39.640 --> 0:15:41.000
<v Speaker 3>seen this, but Lewis.

0:15:40.760 --> 0:15:46.200
<v Speaker 1>Has really really severe Tourette's no way severe, and there

0:15:46.280 --> 0:15:48.800
<v Speaker 1>was a really beautiful video that went around not that

0:15:48.840 --> 0:15:51.040
<v Speaker 1>long ago, Laura, I don't know if you mustn't have

0:15:51.080 --> 0:15:53.720
<v Speaker 1>seen it. His threats has been getting really bad the

0:15:53.800 --> 0:15:57.920
<v Speaker 1>last year, and he was on stage performing and his

0:15:58.040 --> 0:16:00.280
<v Speaker 1>ticks were going off and he couldn't sing any more

0:16:00.280 --> 0:16:02.840
<v Speaker 1>because his convulsions. It takes his whole back. He's got

0:16:02.840 --> 0:16:05.640
<v Speaker 1>extreme back pain. It's so severe and you don't realize

0:16:05.720 --> 0:16:07.280
<v Speaker 1>until you see this documentary.

0:16:07.880 --> 0:16:08.920
<v Speaker 3>But he had to stop.

0:16:08.720 --> 0:16:10.800
<v Speaker 1>Singing in front of like thousands and thousands of people,

0:16:10.920 --> 0:16:13.000
<v Speaker 1>and he felt like, you know, you could see that

0:16:13.040 --> 0:16:16.960
<v Speaker 1>he was a bit embarrassed and upset, and the whole

0:16:17.200 --> 0:16:20.880
<v Speaker 1>audience started to sing the song for him when he

0:16:20.920 --> 0:16:23.120
<v Speaker 1>couldn't sing because of the ticks, and it was just

0:16:23.160 --> 0:16:26.080
<v Speaker 1>like the most beautiful, heartfelt moment. But it's just a

0:16:26.120 --> 0:16:29.120
<v Speaker 1>really honest look into this whole Like it doesn't matter

0:16:29.120 --> 0:16:30.720
<v Speaker 1>how famous you are or how much money you have

0:16:30.920 --> 0:16:33.000
<v Speaker 1>or you know, you never really know what someone's life

0:16:33.040 --> 0:16:35.720
<v Speaker 1>is going through, and no one is safe.

0:16:35.520 --> 0:16:36.200
<v Speaker 3>From mental health.

0:16:36.200 --> 0:16:38.400
<v Speaker 1>Mental health doesn't care, it doesn't discriminate who you are,

0:16:38.440 --> 0:16:41.200
<v Speaker 1>and I think it's a really beautiful insight into that.

0:16:41.600 --> 0:16:44.200
<v Speaker 2>Also with Lewis Capaldi, I think because he's actually so

0:16:44.560 --> 0:16:46.880
<v Speaker 2>funny as well, and I think that funny people are

0:16:46.960 --> 0:16:50.400
<v Speaker 2>very good at masking when they're going through challenging times

0:16:50.400 --> 0:16:52.520
<v Speaker 2>because they use it as a mask as a buffer.

0:16:52.840 --> 0:16:57.000
<v Speaker 2>But he's so fucking hilarious, not only just an amazing singer.

0:16:57.080 --> 0:16:59.440
<v Speaker 2>I haven't seen this documentary, so I will definitely watch it.

0:17:00.160 --> 0:17:03.320
<v Speaker 1>So he literally lives about sixty seconds from me here

0:17:03.480 --> 0:17:06.280
<v Speaker 1>in Glasgow from Ben Like, I walk past his house

0:17:06.400 --> 0:17:08.359
<v Speaker 1>every day, but I didn't know which one it was,

0:17:08.400 --> 0:17:10.560
<v Speaker 1>but I think now I know. So what I'm trying

0:17:10.560 --> 0:17:11.840
<v Speaker 1>to say is I'm going to start.

0:17:11.640 --> 0:17:12.560
<v Speaker 3>To store Lewis Capaldi.

0:17:12.720 --> 0:17:15.000
<v Speaker 1>I'm kinda set out the frapp That's like my wildest

0:17:15.040 --> 0:17:17.120
<v Speaker 1>dream is to get Lewis Capaldi on the podcast.

0:17:17.520 --> 0:17:21.000
<v Speaker 2>Ah okay, well my five for the week is it's

0:17:21.000 --> 0:17:23.280
<v Speaker 2>something very simple. I want to recommend an app which

0:17:23.320 --> 0:17:25.600
<v Speaker 2>is saving my life at the moment. It's one that

0:17:25.680 --> 0:17:28.320
<v Speaker 2>we use all the time when we're trying to schedule

0:17:28.320 --> 0:17:31.200
<v Speaker 2>our lives. It's called time Tree. It is a very

0:17:31.359 --> 0:17:33.359
<v Speaker 2>basic calendar app. I know some of you are going

0:17:33.400 --> 0:17:34.840
<v Speaker 2>to be like, why the fuck don't you just use

0:17:34.840 --> 0:17:38.120
<v Speaker 2>Google Calendars. It's because I find Google Calendar so annoying,

0:17:38.600 --> 0:17:39.720
<v Speaker 2>so annoying I do too.

0:17:40.160 --> 0:17:41.399
<v Speaker 3>I don't know how to use it properly.

0:17:41.520 --> 0:17:41.960
<v Speaker 2>I hate it.

0:17:42.080 --> 0:17:44.200
<v Speaker 3>Yes, And people are like, did you get my invite?

0:17:44.200 --> 0:17:46.439
<v Speaker 2>And I'm like, oh, I don't want your stinking calendar.

0:17:46.480 --> 0:17:48.359
<v Speaker 3>And I'm like, what do I do with that invite?

0:17:48.400 --> 0:17:50.639
<v Speaker 3>I'm like, do I click? Yes? Maybe? Do I schedule it?

0:17:50.760 --> 0:17:50.840
<v Speaker 1>No?

0:17:51.080 --> 0:17:51.880
<v Speaker 3>I'm not about it.

0:17:52.000 --> 0:17:53.400
<v Speaker 2>Yes. Look, I mean I know that for a lot

0:17:53.400 --> 0:17:55.439
<v Speaker 2>of people it's very convenient, and I know that if

0:17:55.440 --> 0:17:57.720
<v Speaker 2>I ever checked my emails and actually said yes to

0:17:57.760 --> 0:18:00.520
<v Speaker 2>any of the calendar invites people sent me, then maybe

0:18:00.520 --> 0:18:03.439
<v Speaker 2>I would find it convenient too. But time Tree is

0:18:03.480 --> 0:18:05.960
<v Speaker 2>something that Britt and Keisha and I all share. We're

0:18:06.000 --> 0:18:08.240
<v Speaker 2>on it together, so we can kind of share each

0:18:08.240 --> 0:18:11.120
<v Speaker 2>other's calendars. And then I have another project that I'm

0:18:11.119 --> 0:18:12.720
<v Speaker 2>working on at the moment, so I have a really

0:18:12.760 --> 0:18:15.359
<v Speaker 2>conflicting calendar. So I've set up a calendar with them.

0:18:15.760 --> 0:18:17.840
<v Speaker 2>I have one with Tony May. It runs my life

0:18:17.880 --> 0:18:19.600
<v Speaker 2>without it. If you don't go in the calendar, I

0:18:19.640 --> 0:18:21.800
<v Speaker 2>forget you exist. That's literally where my life is at

0:18:21.800 --> 0:18:22.280
<v Speaker 2>at the moment.

0:18:22.680 --> 0:18:24.840
<v Speaker 3>You know, you might forget. But time chair is my idea.

0:18:24.840 --> 0:18:26.240
<v Speaker 3>I introduced us to that, so you're welcome.

0:18:26.320 --> 0:18:28.560
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, well that's my vibe. I'm vibing. Thank you so

0:18:28.600 --> 0:18:28.919
<v Speaker 2>much for that.

0:18:29.280 --> 0:18:31.159
<v Speaker 1>She kept doing calendar, Google Calendar, and I was like,

0:18:31.200 --> 0:18:33.800
<v Speaker 1>I can't do it. I was like, here, everyone download

0:18:33.840 --> 0:18:35.080
<v Speaker 1>this new ridiculous app.

0:18:34.920 --> 0:18:35.399
<v Speaker 3>And we'll use that.

0:18:35.560 --> 0:18:37.920
<v Speaker 2>It's free and it's freaking great. Okay, I'm pretty sure

0:18:37.920 --> 0:18:39.760
<v Speaker 2>it's free, or maybe I paid for it. I can't remember.

0:18:40.000 --> 0:18:41.639
<v Speaker 2>This isn't sponsored. It's great.

0:18:41.840 --> 0:18:43.239
<v Speaker 1>I think it's just the free one. I don't think

0:18:43.240 --> 0:18:44.879
<v Speaker 1>we pay for it. It probably gets better if you

0:18:44.920 --> 0:18:45.280
<v Speaker 1>pay for it.

0:18:45.359 --> 0:18:47.679
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but let's not do that. Let's get into answering

0:18:47.720 --> 0:18:48.320
<v Speaker 2>some questions.

0:18:50.359 --> 0:18:52.600
<v Speaker 3>Okay, I'm going to kickstart us with one. Here we go.

0:18:53.160 --> 0:18:55.280
<v Speaker 1>Is it rude to tell a guy in person that

0:18:55.359 --> 0:18:57.680
<v Speaker 1>you don't want to see him for a second date

0:18:57.920 --> 0:18:59.640
<v Speaker 1>at the end of the first date?

0:19:00.119 --> 0:19:02.440
<v Speaker 3>Backstory. I went on a first date the other day.

0:19:02.600 --> 0:19:05.040
<v Speaker 1>It was okay, but I just felt absolutely nothing for

0:19:05.080 --> 0:19:07.639
<v Speaker 1>the guy. So at the end, when we're saying our goodbyes,

0:19:07.880 --> 0:19:10.600
<v Speaker 1>I slipped in that although it was nice to meet him,

0:19:10.680 --> 0:19:13.119
<v Speaker 1>I wasn't interested in hanging out again.

0:19:13.680 --> 0:19:16.920
<v Speaker 3>Each friend I have said this too was shocked.

0:19:17.160 --> 0:19:19.760
<v Speaker 1>They said it was very savage of me, and they asked,

0:19:19.800 --> 0:19:21.560
<v Speaker 1>how could I possibly do this to him?

0:19:21.960 --> 0:19:23.200
<v Speaker 3>I want to know who your friends are.

0:19:23.840 --> 0:19:26.000
<v Speaker 1>I felt great driving home from the day because I

0:19:26.080 --> 0:19:28.040
<v Speaker 1>knew I wasn't gonna have to contact him again.

0:19:28.520 --> 0:19:31.679
<v Speaker 3>But now I'm wondering if this was in fact rude,

0:19:32.000 --> 0:19:34.440
<v Speaker 3>and a little text when I got home was probably

0:19:34.480 --> 0:19:35.200
<v Speaker 3>the way to go.

0:19:35.800 --> 0:19:38.439
<v Speaker 1>Now, I did think this is obviously, I mean, I

0:19:38.480 --> 0:19:40.840
<v Speaker 1>have my opinion on it, but I sent this to Mattie,

0:19:40.920 --> 0:19:43.240
<v Speaker 1>Jay and Ben to get a male's perspective because I

0:19:43.280 --> 0:19:44.880
<v Speaker 1>would love to know how the male would have felt

0:19:44.920 --> 0:19:47.320
<v Speaker 1>in this situation. So go get Mad, bring Mad in

0:19:47.840 --> 0:19:49.240
<v Speaker 1>and we can discuss what we think.

0:19:49.480 --> 0:19:53.679
<v Speaker 2>Okay, I firstly think it's fine. I think it is

0:19:53.760 --> 0:19:56.959
<v Speaker 2>completely fine. It can be delivered in a polite way.

0:19:57.200 --> 0:19:58.960
<v Speaker 2>If you were feeling that, there's a good chance he

0:19:59.000 --> 0:20:00.800
<v Speaker 2>was also feeling the same thing that, like, you know,

0:20:00.880 --> 0:20:03.400
<v Speaker 2>it was nice you were pleasant, but like he didn't

0:20:03.400 --> 0:20:06.680
<v Speaker 2>feel that spark either. I think it's fine. Do I

0:20:06.720 --> 0:20:08.800
<v Speaker 2>think it's ballsy and that most people wouldn't have the

0:20:08.880 --> 0:20:11.680
<v Speaker 2>confidence to do it. Yes, I think most people are

0:20:11.680 --> 0:20:14.800
<v Speaker 2>so scared about offending somebody that they would hate to

0:20:14.840 --> 0:20:17.760
<v Speaker 2>say something like that that's so direct, for fear that

0:20:17.800 --> 0:20:20.720
<v Speaker 2>it would shatter the other person's self confidence. But if

0:20:20.720 --> 0:20:22.880
<v Speaker 2>you've delivered it in like a pleasant way, if you've said,

0:20:22.920 --> 0:20:24.640
<v Speaker 2>you know, had a really nice time. But I think

0:20:24.640 --> 0:20:27.159
<v Speaker 2>we're not each other's person, and I hope you have

0:20:27.240 --> 0:20:30.639
<v Speaker 2>a great life. I think it's fine. I think it

0:20:30.720 --> 0:20:33.359
<v Speaker 2>is so fine. Would I have ever done that? No,

0:20:33.560 --> 0:20:36.199
<v Speaker 2>because I'm a fucking coward, But I'm so glad you're not.

0:20:36.960 --> 0:20:38.600
<v Speaker 3>Oh okay, I think the same thing.

0:20:38.640 --> 0:20:41.040
<v Speaker 1>And I think the problem here is the real underlying

0:20:41.080 --> 0:20:42.960
<v Speaker 1>problem is your friends saying.

0:20:42.760 --> 0:20:44.080
<v Speaker 3>I can't believe you did that.

0:20:44.560 --> 0:20:46.639
<v Speaker 1>I think it's saying more about your friends than it

0:20:46.680 --> 0:20:50.240
<v Speaker 1>is about you. They're viscerally uncomfortable by the fact that

0:20:50.280 --> 0:20:53.320
<v Speaker 1>you had this confrontation and you actually voice your opinion,

0:20:53.359 --> 0:20:55.879
<v Speaker 1>because it does make people uncomfortable. No one wants to

0:20:56.240 --> 0:20:58.080
<v Speaker 1>like shut someone down, or no one wants to hurt

0:20:58.160 --> 0:21:00.320
<v Speaker 1>someone's feelings or in case they had a date.

0:21:00.400 --> 0:21:01.960
<v Speaker 3>You don't want to be the one that was like, ill.

0:21:01.840 --> 0:21:05.360
<v Speaker 1>Gross, I have done this before. I don't ever choose

0:21:05.440 --> 0:21:07.679
<v Speaker 1>to do it, like, I don't want to have that

0:21:07.720 --> 0:21:09.960
<v Speaker 1>moment of letting someone down or in case they did

0:21:10.000 --> 0:21:12.800
<v Speaker 1>have a great date, or the awkwardness. The only times

0:21:12.840 --> 0:21:14.919
<v Speaker 1>I've ever done it when someone has put me on

0:21:14.960 --> 0:21:17.119
<v Speaker 1>the spot and said I had a really great time,

0:21:17.560 --> 0:21:20.119
<v Speaker 1>we'd love to see you again, because I'd rather in

0:21:20.240 --> 0:21:22.920
<v Speaker 1>that moment lie, I mean, I'd rather in that moment

0:21:23.040 --> 0:21:23.680
<v Speaker 1>tell the truth.

0:21:23.720 --> 0:21:24.880
<v Speaker 3>I mean, I'd rather fucking lie.

0:21:24.960 --> 0:21:27.600
<v Speaker 2>I would rather lie I would never see you again.

0:21:27.680 --> 0:21:29.080
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I would hope to say yeah, had a great

0:21:29.080 --> 0:21:30.639
<v Speaker 1>time too, and then never see you again. No, but

0:21:30.640 --> 0:21:32.760
<v Speaker 1>i'd rather in that moment when I'm put on the spot,

0:21:32.760 --> 0:21:35.600
<v Speaker 1>I'd rather tell the truth than say yes, can't wait

0:21:35.640 --> 0:21:37.840
<v Speaker 1>to see you and then get home and say psych,

0:21:38.080 --> 0:21:38.800
<v Speaker 1>I was joking.

0:21:38.960 --> 0:21:40.920
<v Speaker 2>Don't you think that's harder though? If someone's like, hey,

0:21:40.960 --> 0:21:42.400
<v Speaker 2>I just had it such a great time, I can't

0:21:42.440 --> 0:21:46.000
<v Speaker 2>wait to see you again, responding to that with yes, same,

0:21:46.160 --> 0:21:48.440
<v Speaker 2>but I'm not interested in you. So hard terrifying.

0:21:48.520 --> 0:21:51.679
<v Speaker 3>Oh, it's terrible, worst day of my life and I've

0:21:51.720 --> 0:21:55.720
<v Speaker 3>had some pretty bad days. That's pretty bad. I don't

0:21:55.720 --> 0:21:56.320
<v Speaker 3>think there's.

0:21:56.160 --> 0:21:58.200
<v Speaker 1>A better way or a right or a wrong way.

0:21:58.320 --> 0:22:00.240
<v Speaker 1>If you want to wait to get home send the mess,

0:22:00.280 --> 0:22:02.960
<v Speaker 1>that's also fine, like absolutely fine. If you want to

0:22:02.960 --> 0:22:04.480
<v Speaker 1>say it on the spot because you feel better, which

0:22:04.520 --> 0:22:04.920
<v Speaker 1>you did.

0:22:05.320 --> 0:22:06.560
<v Speaker 3>Fine for you.

0:22:06.560 --> 0:22:07.960
<v Speaker 1>You didn't want to get in the car and have

0:22:08.000 --> 0:22:09.800
<v Speaker 1>to think of what you're going to say in a text,

0:22:09.800 --> 0:22:12.440
<v Speaker 1>and obviously the moment came, you did it. I think

0:22:12.480 --> 0:22:16.440
<v Speaker 1>that your friends are reflecting their feelings onto you about

0:22:16.440 --> 0:22:18.120
<v Speaker 1>how uncomfortable they would feel.

0:22:18.200 --> 0:22:20.679
<v Speaker 2>One hundred percent. And I think it also comes down

0:22:20.760 --> 0:22:22.720
<v Speaker 2>to exactly like you said, Britt, this idea of like

0:22:22.760 --> 0:22:27.439
<v Speaker 2>personality types, some people are inherently conflict avoidant, and the

0:22:27.640 --> 0:22:31.120
<v Speaker 2>idea of the thought of doing what you did almost sickening,

0:22:31.160 --> 0:22:34.160
<v Speaker 2>Like it's just like it's petrifying to them, whereas for you,

0:22:34.280 --> 0:22:37.240
<v Speaker 2>it was an empowering moment. Nobody likes to leave a

0:22:37.280 --> 0:22:39.840
<v Speaker 2>first date knowing that you're not going to see them again,

0:22:39.920 --> 0:22:42.040
<v Speaker 2>knowing that you don't want to see them again, and

0:22:42.080 --> 0:22:44.200
<v Speaker 2>then having to do that follow up text because it's

0:22:44.200 --> 0:22:46.480
<v Speaker 2>almost like having more admin work when you've gotten home

0:22:46.520 --> 0:22:49.240
<v Speaker 2>from your date. It's nice sometimes just package it up,

0:22:49.600 --> 0:22:51.399
<v Speaker 2>say what you want to say, and not have to

0:22:51.440 --> 0:22:53.000
<v Speaker 2>then go home and think about fuck. I got all

0:22:53.040 --> 0:22:54.880
<v Speaker 2>right back to the good morning text that this guy

0:22:54.920 --> 0:22:56.359
<v Speaker 2>has just sent me that I don't want to talk to.

0:22:56.600 --> 0:22:59.040
<v Speaker 1>I mean, it's more awkward to if like if he's

0:22:59.160 --> 0:23:02.239
<v Speaker 1>takee like Michelin Star restaurant paid for and then at

0:23:02.240 --> 0:23:04.280
<v Speaker 1>the end, I'm going to take my lobster in it

0:23:04.320 --> 0:23:06.080
<v Speaker 1>to go back, and I never want to see you again.

0:23:06.320 --> 0:23:07.760
<v Speaker 3>But I asked Ben and he.

0:23:07.840 --> 0:23:10.600
<v Speaker 1>Was like, firstly, if the guy has any awareness, he

0:23:10.600 --> 0:23:13.280
<v Speaker 1>would probably feel that there was nothing there from your side,

0:23:13.359 --> 0:23:16.320
<v Speaker 1>like unless you were completely faking it. But like you said, Laura,

0:23:16.359 --> 0:23:19.320
<v Speaker 1>like most people, you get the vibe if it's there

0:23:19.440 --> 0:23:20.920
<v Speaker 1>or not. So he's like, hey, the guy should have

0:23:20.960 --> 0:23:22.920
<v Speaker 1>had some awareness. I said, if this happened to you,

0:23:22.960 --> 0:23:24.880
<v Speaker 1>how would you feel? Would you have been offended? Would

0:23:24.920 --> 0:23:26.840
<v Speaker 1>you think the girl was being rude? And he said,

0:23:26.880 --> 0:23:29.280
<v Speaker 1>it's absolutely fine. Of course it's not nice to hear,

0:23:29.359 --> 0:23:32.520
<v Speaker 1>I suppose, but it's part of dating. Rejection happens. He's

0:23:32.520 --> 0:23:34.160
<v Speaker 1>not gonna lose any sleep about it, and I think

0:23:34.160 --> 0:23:36.840
<v Speaker 1>that that's accurate. I don't think this guy, I don't

0:23:36.840 --> 0:23:39.040
<v Speaker 1>think you have to worry. He's not giving you another thought.

0:23:39.080 --> 0:23:40.280
<v Speaker 1>To be honest, that's what I think. I was like,

0:23:40.320 --> 0:23:42.320
<v Speaker 1>this guy that you let down is not fucking crying

0:23:42.359 --> 0:23:43.400
<v Speaker 1>to his friends, being like.

0:23:43.520 --> 0:23:45.640
<v Speaker 3>Can you believe she said you didn't want to see

0:23:45.720 --> 0:23:47.160
<v Speaker 3>me again? I think you're good.

0:23:47.600 --> 0:23:50.159
<v Speaker 2>I am gonna ask Matt because I feel like he

0:23:50.240 --> 0:23:53.360
<v Speaker 2>might have maybe his fragile male ego has a different

0:23:53.520 --> 0:23:57.080
<v Speaker 2>sense of it, or maybe he's fine, Matt, Matt is fragile,

0:23:57.400 --> 0:23:59.960
<v Speaker 2>He's not fragile. I was teaching I reckon he is. No,

0:24:00.119 --> 0:24:02.480
<v Speaker 2>let's see what he says. He's sensitive, he's not fragile.

0:24:02.640 --> 0:24:03.159
<v Speaker 2>Very different.

0:24:03.240 --> 0:24:05.920
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, potato potato all right.

0:24:05.960 --> 0:24:08.080
<v Speaker 2>So, Matt, if you were on a first date with

0:24:08.080 --> 0:24:11.120
<v Speaker 2>someone and you you know, who knows, maybe you thought

0:24:11.160 --> 0:24:12.959
<v Speaker 2>it went great, maybe you didn't. But at the end

0:24:13.040 --> 0:24:15.119
<v Speaker 2>of the day she said to you that she didn't

0:24:15.119 --> 0:24:15.760
<v Speaker 2>want to see.

0:24:15.560 --> 0:24:17.480
<v Speaker 3>You again in a nicer way.

0:24:17.680 --> 0:24:19.840
<v Speaker 2>Would you prefer it to your face or would you

0:24:19.840 --> 0:24:21.600
<v Speaker 2>prefer it in a text message? Afterwards?

0:24:21.840 --> 0:24:29.280
<v Speaker 4>I did ghost me? Are you kidding? Okay? For some people,

0:24:29.640 --> 0:24:33.200
<v Speaker 4>they may like the news to be delivered honestly and direct,

0:24:33.680 --> 0:24:36.800
<v Speaker 4>but for me, that would fucking destroy me.

0:24:39.800 --> 0:24:41.399
<v Speaker 1>Just when you walked in. We tried to guess what

0:24:41.440 --> 0:24:43.680
<v Speaker 1>you'd say. Laura's like, I think he'll be fine. I'm like, nice,

0:24:43.720 --> 0:24:44.240
<v Speaker 1>pre fragile.

0:24:44.280 --> 0:24:47.159
<v Speaker 3>She's like, MAT's not. And then you're like and You're like,

0:24:47.200 --> 0:24:48.040
<v Speaker 3>I would cry.

0:24:48.480 --> 0:24:50.760
<v Speaker 2>I said, Matt's not fragile, he's sensitive.

0:24:51.200 --> 0:24:54.840
<v Speaker 4>I wouldn't date for five years if someone delivered that

0:24:54.880 --> 0:24:56.639
<v Speaker 4>news to me at the end of the day. I

0:24:56.680 --> 0:24:59.040
<v Speaker 4>guess it depends on the person. I'm talking from personal

0:24:59.080 --> 0:25:03.200
<v Speaker 4>experience here, like to be let down very gently into

0:25:03.240 --> 0:25:08.240
<v Speaker 4>a nice, like cushiony cloud with a blanket.

0:25:07.760 --> 0:25:10.520
<v Speaker 1>So you would rather she get home. So what if

0:25:10.520 --> 0:25:13.160
<v Speaker 1>you said, okay, picture this, Matt. You've had the date

0:25:13.480 --> 0:25:16.400
<v Speaker 1>and you're leaving to say goodbye, and you say, hey,

0:25:16.520 --> 0:25:18.520
<v Speaker 1>I had a really nice time. I'd love to see

0:25:18.560 --> 0:25:20.080
<v Speaker 1>you again, but she doesn't want to see you. What

0:25:20.119 --> 0:25:22.840
<v Speaker 1>would you prefer that she lies to your face and

0:25:22.960 --> 0:25:24.720
<v Speaker 1>lets you down on a text later, or would you

0:25:24.720 --> 0:25:26.760
<v Speaker 1>prefer she says, oh, like, I had a nice time too,

0:25:26.800 --> 0:25:27.920
<v Speaker 1>but I don't want to see you again.

0:25:28.040 --> 0:25:30.560
<v Speaker 4>I think that's one of the very few situations in

0:25:30.600 --> 0:25:37.200
<v Speaker 4>life where lying directly to someone's face is absolutely acceptable. Okay.

0:25:37.440 --> 0:25:40.480
<v Speaker 4>The only awkward thing would be if the person you're

0:25:40.480 --> 0:25:43.000
<v Speaker 4>going on the date, we've tried to kiss you, oh yeah,

0:25:43.080 --> 0:25:44.680
<v Speaker 4>and I went in for the kissing, and then you

0:25:44.760 --> 0:25:46.680
<v Speaker 4>might have to say, hey, I'm really sorry.

0:25:46.600 --> 0:25:47.359
<v Speaker 2>But you suck.

0:25:47.640 --> 0:25:49.560
<v Speaker 1>No, that's where you have to just suck it up,

0:25:49.640 --> 0:25:52.600
<v Speaker 1>fake kiss like you can't not like, let's take one

0:25:52.600 --> 0:25:54.080
<v Speaker 1>for the team's too awkward.

0:25:54.400 --> 0:25:56.320
<v Speaker 4>And you're just got to date them for like six months.

0:25:56.320 --> 0:25:59.119
<v Speaker 4>And then Laura actually didn't want to be with me

0:25:59.200 --> 0:26:01.560
<v Speaker 4>when I proposed, but she's just like, I know how

0:26:01.640 --> 0:26:02.920
<v Speaker 4>fucking sensitive he is.

0:26:03.400 --> 0:26:06.320
<v Speaker 3>I just she's like, it'll just break him.

0:26:07.320 --> 0:26:09.119
<v Speaker 4>I'll have one kid, and then she's like, shit, he

0:26:09.160 --> 0:26:12.720
<v Speaker 4>gotta be pregnant again. I'll have two of them. We'll

0:26:12.720 --> 0:26:13.160
<v Speaker 4>call it.

0:26:14.600 --> 0:26:18.399
<v Speaker 3>And now it's been for six years and it's been

0:26:18.440 --> 0:26:19.560
<v Speaker 3>a slow and steady race.

0:26:19.520 --> 0:26:21.800
<v Speaker 2>Be right, honey, Yeah, forever, forever and ever.

0:26:22.480 --> 0:26:25.000
<v Speaker 3>Well, I don't know if we've come to a conclusion, because.

0:26:24.760 --> 0:26:26.320
<v Speaker 2>Do you think we've got a conclusion on that?

0:26:26.560 --> 0:26:29.160
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, well no, I'm saying it's okay to be honest.

0:26:29.240 --> 0:26:31.040
<v Speaker 1>I think you're saying the same Laura. And Matt's just like,

0:26:31.080 --> 0:26:32.199
<v Speaker 1>fuck no, don't break the man.

0:26:32.280 --> 0:26:34.239
<v Speaker 4>Down, Rick, Can I ask you if you've ever had

0:26:34.240 --> 0:26:37.760
<v Speaker 4>a really bad date and you've texted a friend and say, hey,

0:26:37.800 --> 0:26:40.120
<v Speaker 4>can you call me and pretend like there's an emergency and.

0:26:40.080 --> 0:26:41.000
<v Speaker 3>Then yes, I have.

0:26:41.119 --> 0:26:43.000
<v Speaker 4>It gives me a and gives me a reason to

0:26:43.080 --> 0:26:43.879
<v Speaker 4>leave the date early.

0:26:44.040 --> 0:26:44.520
<v Speaker 3>Yes, I did.

0:26:44.560 --> 0:26:47.720
<v Speaker 1>That's fat I've done that one right. But I don't

0:26:47.720 --> 0:26:49.080
<v Speaker 1>think you should do that either. I don't think you

0:26:49.160 --> 0:26:51.320
<v Speaker 1>need to. I think you can see a dinner date

0:26:51.359 --> 0:26:52.919
<v Speaker 1>out and then just say and you don't have to

0:26:53.000 --> 0:26:55.280
<v Speaker 1>elongate it. Actually Ben has said that he's done that.

0:26:55.320 --> 0:26:57.320
<v Speaker 1>Ben's like, I'll just not get dessert, you know, like

0:26:57.400 --> 0:26:59.240
<v Speaker 1>if the date's not gone, well, I'll just be like,

0:26:59.440 --> 0:27:01.080
<v Speaker 1>let's just call, you know, like we don't need to

0:27:01.080 --> 0:27:02.000
<v Speaker 1>dessert in the extras.

0:27:02.080 --> 0:27:03.480
<v Speaker 3>But I don't think you need an out. I think

0:27:03.480 --> 0:27:04.920
<v Speaker 3>people just need to be a bit more honest.

0:27:05.240 --> 0:27:07.560
<v Speaker 1>But maybe that's because I'm getting old and like now

0:27:07.560 --> 0:27:09.399
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, I don't care, Like, just be honest.

0:27:09.480 --> 0:27:12.760
<v Speaker 2>So many people are so scared of hurting other people's feelings,

0:27:12.760 --> 0:27:15.399
<v Speaker 2>which is understandable because we want to be kind, like

0:27:15.760 --> 0:27:18.840
<v Speaker 2>inherently most people don't want to be assholes to other people.

0:27:19.400 --> 0:27:22.119
<v Speaker 2>And so I think the majority of people listening to

0:27:22.160 --> 0:27:24.360
<v Speaker 2>this would do the text afterwards. I think that that's

0:27:24.359 --> 0:27:27.199
<v Speaker 2>probably a very standard approach. But if you want to

0:27:27.200 --> 0:27:30.399
<v Speaker 2>be someone who is confident and takes the balls by

0:27:30.000 --> 0:27:33.160
<v Speaker 2>the bull by the bulls, the ball by the bulls, yeah,

0:27:33.240 --> 0:27:35.000
<v Speaker 2>then I think you can tell them to their face,

0:27:35.200 --> 0:27:37.960
<v Speaker 2>but just know that you might crush someone like Naddy

0:27:38.040 --> 0:27:40.040
<v Speaker 2>Jay and his fragile little heart.

0:27:40.240 --> 0:27:42.440
<v Speaker 1>But the question is, was I rude to tell him

0:27:42.880 --> 0:27:45.680
<v Speaker 1>fuck no, like you don't want to see the guy again?

0:27:45.760 --> 0:27:48.800
<v Speaker 1>Like you didn't tell him hey, like I think you're ugly,

0:27:48.960 --> 0:27:50.720
<v Speaker 1>or you didn't say anything to be rude and offensive.

0:27:50.760 --> 0:27:52.879
<v Speaker 1>You just said I we're not jelling. You're not my penguin.

0:27:52.880 --> 0:27:54.080
<v Speaker 1>There's a billion people in the world.

0:27:54.320 --> 0:27:55.160
<v Speaker 3>You're not it.

0:27:55.160 --> 0:27:58.040
<v Speaker 4>It's not rude. It's just an action that lacked a

0:27:58.080 --> 0:28:01.160
<v Speaker 4>little bit of empathy. I think. I think it's not rude,

0:28:01.640 --> 0:28:06.200
<v Speaker 4>not wrong, it's just softer ways of doing things.

0:28:06.600 --> 0:28:08.119
<v Speaker 3>Yes, I do agree. I do agree.

0:28:08.119 --> 0:28:09.880
<v Speaker 2>Well, I have a question which I'm going to keep

0:28:09.880 --> 0:28:12.560
<v Speaker 2>you here for, Matt, now that you've joined this little threesome,

0:28:12.840 --> 0:28:13.280
<v Speaker 2>so this.

0:28:13.280 --> 0:28:15.240
<v Speaker 4>One this is nice, isn't it. Guys.

0:28:15.720 --> 0:28:17.960
<v Speaker 3>It's been a while since we've done the threesome.

0:28:18.119 --> 0:28:21.560
<v Speaker 4>I know, I know a bit rusty.

0:28:22.520 --> 0:28:24.160
<v Speaker 2>I also have just had a colon cleanse.

0:28:24.280 --> 0:28:25.760
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, perfect timing.

0:28:27.240 --> 0:28:28.080
<v Speaker 3>It's not sexy.

0:28:28.400 --> 0:28:31.199
<v Speaker 4>I don't know if Laura told this already, but last

0:28:31.320 --> 0:28:34.320
<v Speaker 4>night the TV turned off and I was like scrolling

0:28:34.320 --> 0:28:37.399
<v Speaker 4>on social media and the room, like the house is

0:28:37.480 --> 0:28:39.680
<v Speaker 4>very quiet, obviously because the girls are sleeping, and all

0:28:39.720 --> 0:28:42.680
<v Speaker 4>I could hear coming from the en suite from our

0:28:42.680 --> 0:28:43.480
<v Speaker 4>bedroom was.

0:28:49.160 --> 0:28:52.000
<v Speaker 3>In her defense. She's taken a laxity of like what

0:28:52.040 --> 0:28:52.520
<v Speaker 3>we expect?

0:28:53.360 --> 0:28:54.680
<v Speaker 2>You're so mean, and I.

0:28:54.520 --> 0:28:58.160
<v Speaker 4>Was like, honey, isn't clear yet. She's like, it's still brown,

0:28:58.200 --> 0:28:58.840
<v Speaker 4>it's rusty.

0:28:58.960 --> 0:29:00.320
<v Speaker 3>She's like, don't come in here.

0:29:00.840 --> 0:29:03.240
<v Speaker 2>This is so messed up. I did ask you to stay,

0:29:03.280 --> 0:29:04.240
<v Speaker 2>but now I want you to go.

0:29:04.480 --> 0:29:06.280
<v Speaker 3>No say that.

0:29:06.360 --> 0:29:08.840
<v Speaker 1>Funnily enough, Laura hadn't mentioned that yet, so thank you

0:29:08.880 --> 0:29:09.640
<v Speaker 1>for bringing that back.

0:29:09.760 --> 0:29:11.080
<v Speaker 3>But Laura, keep going, keep going.

0:29:11.120 --> 0:29:13.320
<v Speaker 2>We are forty minutes into this episode and we've answered

0:29:13.320 --> 0:29:13.920
<v Speaker 2>one question.

0:29:14.320 --> 0:29:14.680
<v Speaker 4>Good.

0:29:15.120 --> 0:29:16.320
<v Speaker 3>It has been funny.

0:29:16.360 --> 0:29:19.880
<v Speaker 2>Okay, all right, Question number two. I love my husband.

0:29:20.360 --> 0:29:24.600
<v Speaker 2>I love my husband so much. However, I never feel

0:29:24.600 --> 0:29:27.080
<v Speaker 2>like I get a good night's sleep. So I have

0:29:27.200 --> 0:29:30.720
<v Speaker 2>decided that I would like to sleep in the spare bedroom.

0:29:31.040 --> 0:29:31.200
<v Speaker 4>Now.

0:29:31.240 --> 0:29:34.560
<v Speaker 2>I broached this conversation with my husband recently and he was,

0:29:35.120 --> 0:29:38.280
<v Speaker 2>dare I say, very very offended by it. He thinks

0:29:38.280 --> 0:29:40.680
<v Speaker 2>that it means that our relationships coming to an end,

0:29:40.720 --> 0:29:42.760
<v Speaker 2>that I no longer want to be intimate with him,

0:29:42.880 --> 0:29:45.440
<v Speaker 2>or I no longer find him attractive. But the truth is,

0:29:45.600 --> 0:29:47.760
<v Speaker 2>I just can't stand the way he breathes at.

0:29:47.720 --> 0:29:50.840
<v Speaker 4>Nightclas since it was soul, a man after my own heart.

0:29:51.360 --> 0:29:54.400
<v Speaker 1>I can't stand the way he exists and literally lives

0:29:54.400 --> 0:29:55.000
<v Speaker 1>by breathing.

0:29:55.240 --> 0:29:57.160
<v Speaker 2>So the reason why I found this so funny is

0:29:57.200 --> 0:30:00.240
<v Speaker 2>because he's not a snorer. Now, It's not the he's

0:30:00.280 --> 0:30:03.479
<v Speaker 2>making an overt snoring noise. It's that he makes a

0:30:03.600 --> 0:30:07.280
<v Speaker 2>very loud, breathy noise whilst he sleeps, which I can

0:30:07.360 --> 0:30:09.720
<v Speaker 2>relate to this because this is the noise that Matt

0:30:09.800 --> 0:30:11.760
<v Speaker 2>makes when Matt sleeps. And it's this.

0:30:14.560 --> 0:30:16.000
<v Speaker 4>That's from my mouth, not my asshole.

0:30:18.720 --> 0:30:19.560
<v Speaker 3>It's probably from both.

0:30:19.600 --> 0:30:21.400
<v Speaker 1>I've heard you beatbox, and I've always wondered how you

0:30:21.400 --> 0:30:21.840
<v Speaker 1>did it, Matt.

0:30:21.880 --> 0:30:23.520
<v Speaker 2>It's how you do it?

0:30:23.560 --> 0:30:25.120
<v Speaker 4>Is this about me? Is this about me?

0:30:25.600 --> 0:30:26.360
<v Speaker 2>No? I love sleep.

0:30:26.560 --> 0:30:27.800
<v Speaker 4>What's the right word codependent?

0:30:27.880 --> 0:30:30.280
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I'm codependent. I'm never going to sleep in another bed.

0:30:31.000 --> 0:30:32.880
<v Speaker 3>I know the exact sound you're referring to.

0:30:33.040 --> 0:30:36.720
<v Speaker 2>That that sound, Yeah, it's like someone's playing a game

0:30:36.720 --> 0:30:37.800
<v Speaker 2>of tennis in the middle of the night.

0:30:37.880 --> 0:30:42.080
<v Speaker 1>Oh, it's annoying as fuck across the course.

0:30:42.040 --> 0:30:44.880
<v Speaker 3>So annoying. Like I think that's a tricky one.

0:30:44.960 --> 0:30:45.920
<v Speaker 4>And it wakes you up.

0:30:46.160 --> 0:30:48.040
<v Speaker 3>Well, yeah, if you're a light sleeper, it's not that.

0:30:48.160 --> 0:30:50.040
<v Speaker 1>It's just that, you know when there's okay, picture this,

0:30:50.720 --> 0:30:52.960
<v Speaker 1>You're in bed, you're all relaxed, you're going to sleep,

0:30:53.040 --> 0:30:56.760
<v Speaker 1>and then somebody brings your attention that outside your window

0:30:56.840 --> 0:31:03.520
<v Speaker 1>there is a drip. Once it's brought to your attention,

0:31:03.720 --> 0:31:08.360
<v Speaker 1>you cannot unhear it. So once this has been brought

0:31:08.600 --> 0:31:10.360
<v Speaker 1>she's never going to switch off because that's all she's

0:31:10.360 --> 0:31:11.960
<v Speaker 1>going to hear the whole time. Get the fuck out

0:31:11.960 --> 0:31:14.240
<v Speaker 1>of there, get to the spare room, live your best life.

0:31:14.280 --> 0:31:15.040
<v Speaker 3>That's what I'm saying.

0:31:15.160 --> 0:31:18.280
<v Speaker 4>You guys need to suck it up to fucking drip.

0:31:18.400 --> 0:31:19.560
<v Speaker 2>What would you do if I said to you, I

0:31:19.600 --> 0:31:22.120
<v Speaker 2>wanted to sleep in the spare room because you're parking. No,

0:31:22.600 --> 0:31:23.360
<v Speaker 2>it was too much for me.

0:31:23.560 --> 0:31:26.600
<v Speaker 4>I'd be like, that's fucking part of marriage, that's what

0:31:26.640 --> 0:31:27.640
<v Speaker 4>you signed up for.

0:31:27.840 --> 0:31:29.360
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but don't you think you can go to another

0:31:29.440 --> 0:31:31.040
<v Speaker 1>room and just both ensure that you have a good

0:31:31.120 --> 0:31:34.800
<v Speaker 1>night sleep, like maybe cuddle to almost sleep and then evacuate.

0:31:35.280 --> 0:31:39.200
<v Speaker 4>Okay, Look, if you want to cuddle with me to

0:31:39.480 --> 0:31:43.840
<v Speaker 4>fall asleep and then leave to another bedroom, that's totally.

0:31:43.520 --> 0:31:45.840
<v Speaker 3>Fine, exactly that's the dream.

0:31:46.040 --> 0:31:48.200
<v Speaker 4>But after I've gone to sleep, and then you can

0:31:48.240 --> 0:31:51.320
<v Speaker 4>come check on me a couple hours later to make

0:31:51.360 --> 0:31:53.480
<v Speaker 4>sure I'm still asleep, and then you can go back

0:31:53.520 --> 0:31:57.600
<v Speaker 4>to Yeah, if there's a draft stuff.

0:31:57.840 --> 0:32:01.520
<v Speaker 2>You are possibly the cutest grown man that's ever existed.

0:32:01.720 --> 0:32:03.360
<v Speaker 4>If you honestly, if you said I want to sleep

0:32:03.360 --> 0:32:05.640
<v Speaker 4>in another room as long as you still had sex,

0:32:06.000 --> 0:32:06.680
<v Speaker 4>doesn't bother me.

0:32:07.120 --> 0:32:09.400
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I think answering this question properly. I mean, we

0:32:09.400 --> 0:32:10.520
<v Speaker 2>can make a lot of jokes about it, but there

0:32:10.520 --> 0:32:12.520
<v Speaker 2>are so many people. There are so many couples who

0:32:12.560 --> 0:32:15.040
<v Speaker 2>sleep in separate rooms, who still love each other and

0:32:15.040 --> 0:32:18.320
<v Speaker 2>are in great relationships, they just can't sleep. I also

0:32:18.360 --> 0:32:20.680
<v Speaker 2>think that like once you've had kids, things change because

0:32:20.880 --> 0:32:23.000
<v Speaker 2>you know, Marley, for example, gets into our bed every

0:32:23.080 --> 0:32:25.160
<v Speaker 2>night time, and I usually get out of our bed

0:32:25.200 --> 0:32:26.760
<v Speaker 2>and go and sleep in her bed at three o'clock

0:32:26.760 --> 0:32:29.600
<v Speaker 2>every morning. So, like, I think that it doesn't have

0:32:29.760 --> 0:32:32.000
<v Speaker 2>to be a symbol that something's wrong in the relationship.

0:32:32.160 --> 0:32:33.800
<v Speaker 2>But I do think that you have to have all

0:32:33.840 --> 0:32:36.000
<v Speaker 2>the intimacy that goes around it, you know, you have

0:32:36.080 --> 0:32:38.960
<v Speaker 2>to still have the cuddles in bed before you decide

0:32:38.960 --> 0:32:39.680
<v Speaker 2>to part ways.

0:32:39.680 --> 0:32:43.120
<v Speaker 4>And god, I mean, let's be honest. We literally give

0:32:43.160 --> 0:32:45.600
<v Speaker 4>each other a pet good night, and then we're at

0:32:45.640 --> 0:32:48.040
<v Speaker 4>completely opposite ends of the bed. That's about it.

0:32:48.120 --> 0:32:48.280
<v Speaker 1>You know.

0:32:48.280 --> 0:32:50.880
<v Speaker 4>Obviously we have sex, but on the nights that we're

0:32:50.920 --> 0:32:52.560
<v Speaker 4>not having sex, it's like good night.

0:32:53.040 --> 0:32:55.600
<v Speaker 1>Ninety seven percent of the time, we're just like good night,

0:32:55.680 --> 0:32:56.240
<v Speaker 1>roll that's it.

0:32:56.280 --> 0:32:58.840
<v Speaker 4>Well, brit when you fall asleep, like tonight, when you

0:32:58.880 --> 0:33:01.960
<v Speaker 4>go to sleep, will you you spoon or will you

0:33:02.880 --> 0:33:05.280
<v Speaker 4>Like how does that work as in a new relationship, Yeah, but.

0:33:05.280 --> 0:33:07.280
<v Speaker 2>They're in a new relationship, we spoon for the first year.

0:33:07.360 --> 0:33:08.440
<v Speaker 4>No, I know, but I just want to I want

0:33:08.480 --> 0:33:10.800
<v Speaker 4>to live the life of a young, fresh relationship for

0:33:10.880 --> 0:33:11.720
<v Speaker 4>just the second.

0:33:11.480 --> 0:33:14.160
<v Speaker 1>No, we definitely, like we sex it up and then

0:33:14.200 --> 0:33:16.200
<v Speaker 1>we cuddle and like spoon and stuff like that.

0:33:16.240 --> 0:33:18.840
<v Speaker 3>But then all right, legend, No, but it's not the

0:33:18.880 --> 0:33:19.320
<v Speaker 3>whole night.

0:33:19.440 --> 0:33:21.200
<v Speaker 1>I don't think we actually cuddle most of the night

0:33:21.320 --> 0:33:23.240
<v Speaker 1>because we both want a good night sleep, so we

0:33:23.280 --> 0:33:25.240
<v Speaker 1>cud you know, for the first like ten or fifteen,

0:33:25.280 --> 0:33:26.960
<v Speaker 1>you know, just they're dozing off, and then we roll

0:33:27.000 --> 0:33:27.920
<v Speaker 1>on to the other side.

0:33:28.160 --> 0:33:29.880
<v Speaker 3>But Ben, like I could probably sleep.

0:33:29.640 --> 0:33:32.560
<v Speaker 1>In another bed one day, because Ben's he's a quiet sleeper,

0:33:32.560 --> 0:33:35.920
<v Speaker 1>but he's so big. He takes up the entire bed.

0:33:36.000 --> 0:33:38.120
<v Speaker 1>Like his feet are off the end, they're diagonally across

0:33:38.160 --> 0:33:40.640
<v Speaker 1>the end. His arm span is like an albatross. There's

0:33:40.680 --> 0:33:42.880
<v Speaker 1>no room for me in the bed.

0:33:43.320 --> 0:33:45.400
<v Speaker 2>But Matt, you lie because you say that we like

0:33:45.560 --> 0:33:47.560
<v Speaker 2>part ways and we sleep on other sides of the bed.

0:33:47.800 --> 0:33:50.400
<v Speaker 2>We fall asleep, and there's always one body path that's touching.

0:33:50.480 --> 0:33:52.720
<v Speaker 2>Usually I have like my foot on your calf or something.

0:33:52.760 --> 0:33:57.000
<v Speaker 2>There's always one thing that's touching somewhere that like signifies

0:33:57.000 --> 0:33:59.880
<v Speaker 2>we're still in bed together. Yeah, correct, Yeah, there's always

0:33:59.880 --> 0:34:00.560
<v Speaker 2>one touch point.

0:34:00.680 --> 0:34:02.840
<v Speaker 1>I think the important part here is at the end

0:34:02.840 --> 0:34:04.680
<v Speaker 1>of the day, she's not getting the sleep she needs.

0:34:04.680 --> 0:34:07.320
<v Speaker 3>That's the question. She cannot sleep, She's awake all night.

0:34:07.440 --> 0:34:10.239
<v Speaker 1>She might have kids, she might have a stressful job,

0:34:10.280 --> 0:34:11.720
<v Speaker 1>she needs to get to she needs to get asleep

0:34:11.760 --> 0:34:13.120
<v Speaker 1>so they can sleep in other rooms.

0:34:13.120 --> 0:34:14.840
<v Speaker 2>I think it's okay, yeah, but I think to be

0:34:14.840 --> 0:34:16.960
<v Speaker 2>able to answer it, I mean, like, if your partner's offended,

0:34:16.960 --> 0:34:19.680
<v Speaker 2>if your partner's upset by it, what's the next steps.

0:34:19.719 --> 0:34:23.320
<v Speaker 2>I think the reassurance is what it is, or maybe

0:34:23.320 --> 0:34:25.560
<v Speaker 2>it is that you fall asleep in the bed together,

0:34:25.680 --> 0:34:27.480
<v Speaker 2>and then you know, when you wake up or you

0:34:27.520 --> 0:34:29.000
<v Speaker 2>are woken up, you get up and you go to

0:34:29.080 --> 0:34:31.640
<v Speaker 2>the other room. But I think if you're dismissive in this,

0:34:31.760 --> 0:34:33.080
<v Speaker 2>I think if you turn around, you're like, I'm going

0:34:33.120 --> 0:34:35.480
<v Speaker 2>to go sleep in the other bedroom, that can make

0:34:35.520 --> 0:34:37.960
<v Speaker 2>someone feel very shut out in the relationship. So as

0:34:38.040 --> 0:34:39.600
<v Speaker 2>much as we can sit here and make jokes about it,

0:34:39.600 --> 0:34:41.799
<v Speaker 2>I still think that this is something that a lot

0:34:41.800 --> 0:34:44.400
<v Speaker 2>of people have to deal with in their relationships, especially

0:34:44.440 --> 0:34:46.120
<v Speaker 2>when you've been in a really long term. And it's

0:34:46.120 --> 0:34:48.080
<v Speaker 2>also when you can start to feel like the passion's

0:34:48.120 --> 0:34:51.040
<v Speaker 2>gone a bit and the intimacy and the feelings of

0:34:51.120 --> 0:34:54.040
<v Speaker 2>being wanted are starting to erode. So be careful with

0:34:54.080 --> 0:34:54.920
<v Speaker 2>it too, because.

0:34:54.880 --> 0:34:56.520
<v Speaker 4>I think, you know, if I was going to put

0:34:56.560 --> 0:34:59.600
<v Speaker 4>myself in the shoes of the husband here and think

0:34:59.600 --> 0:35:03.040
<v Speaker 4>about the insecurity. It would be the fact that this

0:35:03.120 --> 0:35:06.600
<v Speaker 4>could be the beginning of further separation, Like you know,

0:35:06.640 --> 0:35:09.399
<v Speaker 4>it begins when you go to bed, and then once

0:35:09.440 --> 0:35:11.799
<v Speaker 4>you get used to that routine of not having that

0:35:11.840 --> 0:35:14.440
<v Speaker 4>contact all the time, it may be harder to then

0:35:14.480 --> 0:35:16.920
<v Speaker 4>be intimate because you're in separate bedrooms. So I think

0:35:16.960 --> 0:35:19.239
<v Speaker 4>that would be my fear that it would be the

0:35:19.280 --> 0:35:21.719
<v Speaker 4>beginning of the undoing of the relationship.

0:35:22.160 --> 0:35:24.360
<v Speaker 3>Well, then the guy needs to go to a respiratory specialist.

0:35:24.400 --> 0:35:26.400
<v Speaker 3>Guy needs to go and go to a sleep doctor,

0:35:26.520 --> 0:35:28.359
<v Speaker 3>go to a breathing doctor, sort the shit out.

0:35:28.400 --> 0:35:30.160
<v Speaker 1>But it's I don't know. I think I think you

0:35:30.160 --> 0:35:31.879
<v Speaker 1>guys are overthinking it. I think, of course you're gonna

0:35:31.880 --> 0:35:33.120
<v Speaker 1>reashore room. Of course you're gonna go.

0:35:33.120 --> 0:35:35.080
<v Speaker 3>Baby. I love you so much, like you are my

0:35:35.120 --> 0:35:36.080
<v Speaker 3>whole entire world.

0:35:36.400 --> 0:35:39.759
<v Speaker 1>But I cannot sleep with you breathing so loudly all night,

0:35:39.800 --> 0:35:41.080
<v Speaker 1>like I'm gonna have to try and nap in the

0:35:41.080 --> 0:35:41.440
<v Speaker 1>other room.

0:35:41.480 --> 0:35:43.520
<v Speaker 3>I don't know. I don't think it's the end of

0:35:43.520 --> 0:35:43.920
<v Speaker 3>the world.

0:35:44.320 --> 0:35:46.239
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I agree, I know, I totally agree with you.

0:35:46.239 --> 0:35:47.560
<v Speaker 2>I don't think it's the end of the world because

0:35:47.600 --> 0:35:48.840
<v Speaker 2>I know so many couples who do it?

0:35:48.880 --> 0:35:49.040
<v Speaker 3>God.

0:35:49.080 --> 0:35:52.280
<v Speaker 2>I know couples who live together but they have separate bedrooms,

0:35:52.320 --> 0:35:56.080
<v Speaker 2>which sounds like the fucking dreams. They've got wardrobes. They're

0:35:56.120 --> 0:35:58.120
<v Speaker 2>a single couple. They live in a two bedroom house

0:35:58.160 --> 0:35:59.960
<v Speaker 2>and they don't have kids, and they have their own

0:36:00.040 --> 0:36:02.319
<v Speaker 2>own bedroom, so they sleep, they fall asleep with each other,

0:36:02.360 --> 0:36:03.680
<v Speaker 2>and then they go to their own beds.

0:36:03.520 --> 0:36:05.520
<v Speaker 4>Or they're gonna have a terrible time when they have kids.

0:36:05.560 --> 0:36:07.360
<v Speaker 2>I know, how are they going to adjust.

0:36:07.640 --> 0:36:09.880
<v Speaker 1>I know a couple that have been married for forty

0:36:10.000 --> 0:36:14.120
<v Speaker 1>years happily, that live in the same street but in

0:36:14.280 --> 0:36:17.640
<v Speaker 1>different houses. They have dinner together every night they're together,

0:36:17.880 --> 0:36:19.680
<v Speaker 1>but then they go to their own house.

0:36:19.880 --> 0:36:23.319
<v Speaker 2>That's my parents. Oh yeah, that's my mum and my stepdad. Yeah,

0:36:23.360 --> 0:36:26.319
<v Speaker 2>they have different houses and they'd be married for fifteen.

0:36:26.040 --> 0:36:28.399
<v Speaker 4>Years, but they're just constantly having sleepovers.

0:36:28.560 --> 0:36:30.440
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, they do. They sleep over each other's houses all

0:36:30.440 --> 0:36:32.919
<v Speaker 2>the time. It's cute anyway. I feel like I don't

0:36:32.920 --> 0:36:34.560
<v Speaker 2>know if we've answered it, but I feel like we've

0:36:34.560 --> 0:36:37.560
<v Speaker 2>got close. I think ultimately it's not the silver bullet

0:36:37.560 --> 0:36:40.080
<v Speaker 2>that killed the relationship. It doesn't mean your relationship's over,

0:36:40.640 --> 0:36:42.800
<v Speaker 2>but I think that you have to be really sensitive

0:36:42.800 --> 0:36:44.279
<v Speaker 2>with how you bring it up, and if it is

0:36:44.320 --> 0:36:46.840
<v Speaker 2>building an insecurity in your partner, then you have to

0:36:47.000 --> 0:36:49.719
<v Speaker 2>give a lot of reassurance that the only reason why

0:36:49.800 --> 0:36:51.480
<v Speaker 2>you're doing it is because you're not getting a good

0:36:51.560 --> 0:36:54.239
<v Speaker 2>night's sleep. Yes, correct, Okay, Matthew Johnson, that's enough from you.

0:36:54.520 --> 0:36:57.480
<v Speaker 3>Thank you for contributing. Matthew johnsonh are you very welcome?

0:36:57.680 --> 0:36:58.279
<v Speaker 2>You're a good man.

0:36:58.600 --> 0:37:01.560
<v Speaker 1>Last question, My boyfriends a piece of jewelry that his

0:37:01.840 --> 0:37:04.400
<v Speaker 1>ex got for him and he still wears it. I

0:37:04.400 --> 0:37:07.160
<v Speaker 1>know he's completely over her, so that isn't the issue.

0:37:07.200 --> 0:37:09.680
<v Speaker 1>But the question here is that is it weird if

0:37:09.840 --> 0:37:11.560
<v Speaker 1>I were to get him a piece of jewelry as

0:37:11.560 --> 0:37:14.400
<v Speaker 1>a gift now because it might bring up memories of.

0:37:14.280 --> 0:37:15.160
<v Speaker 3>Her and the ex?

0:37:15.680 --> 0:37:18.000
<v Speaker 1>Is it weird if he still wears that jewelry? Am

0:37:18.040 --> 0:37:19.839
<v Speaker 1>I allowed to buy him a piece that replaces it.

0:37:19.960 --> 0:37:22.400
<v Speaker 1>That's the kind of vibe here with this ex jewelry

0:37:22.440 --> 0:37:24.520
<v Speaker 1>boyfriend thing. Hope you can get back to me. Keep

0:37:24.520 --> 0:37:27.280
<v Speaker 1>me anonymous, of course, we keep you anonymous. So essentially

0:37:27.280 --> 0:37:30.400
<v Speaker 1>it's in a new relationship, the partner still has jewelry

0:37:30.480 --> 0:37:31.200
<v Speaker 1>from an ex.

0:37:31.680 --> 0:37:32.600
<v Speaker 3>What are your thoughts on that?

0:37:33.320 --> 0:37:33.600
<v Speaker 1>Well?

0:37:33.640 --> 0:37:35.319
<v Speaker 2>I mean, I think we should start with what are

0:37:35.400 --> 0:37:37.600
<v Speaker 2>your thoughts on it, Brittany, because I know a certain

0:37:37.680 --> 0:37:40.040
<v Speaker 2>ring you've been wearing recently which is not from a

0:37:40.040 --> 0:37:42.840
<v Speaker 2>recent ex boyfriend. It's from a very very old ex boyfriend.

0:37:43.200 --> 0:37:44.960
<v Speaker 2>But you found it in your jewelry box and you

0:37:44.960 --> 0:37:47.040
<v Speaker 2>were like, I'm gonna start wearing this again.

0:37:47.400 --> 0:37:50.200
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Look, I might be an anomaly, but I'm sort

0:37:50.200 --> 0:37:53.040
<v Speaker 1>of okay with this. I have jewelry from previous partners

0:37:53.080 --> 0:37:54.799
<v Speaker 1>that I still wear because I like the jewelry. I

0:37:54.800 --> 0:37:57.480
<v Speaker 1>don't put it on and think of the person and

0:37:57.520 --> 0:37:59.960
<v Speaker 1>it doesn't bring those memories up. But that's right, Laura.

0:38:00.200 --> 0:38:02.880
<v Speaker 1>My first ever boyfriend, like I reckon, he gave me

0:38:02.920 --> 0:38:05.120
<v Speaker 1>this ring when I was eighteen.

0:38:05.760 --> 0:38:09.000
<v Speaker 3>I'm thirty five now, so like a long time and.

0:38:08.960 --> 0:38:12.040
<v Speaker 1>It's just this little silver, like small thin silver ring

0:38:12.120 --> 0:38:14.560
<v Speaker 1>with a little diamondything in it. And I found it

0:38:14.600 --> 0:38:16.440
<v Speaker 1>again recently and I was like, I was looking for

0:38:16.480 --> 0:38:18.000
<v Speaker 1>some rings to lay out, and I was like.

0:38:17.880 --> 0:38:18.600
<v Speaker 3>Oh, perfect.

0:38:18.640 --> 0:38:20.839
<v Speaker 1>I didn't think, oh my god, that's from my first

0:38:20.880 --> 0:38:21.440
<v Speaker 1>ever boyfriend.

0:38:21.440 --> 0:38:22.759
<v Speaker 3>That's so cute. It didn't keep it in a box

0:38:22.840 --> 0:38:24.279
<v Speaker 3>under my bed, but.

0:38:24.440 --> 0:38:27.120
<v Speaker 1>I had been all the letters he wrote me, Yeah,

0:38:27.400 --> 0:38:28.799
<v Speaker 1>but I think you know, it was a nice ring.

0:38:28.840 --> 0:38:30.239
<v Speaker 1>It went with what I was wearing. It was a

0:38:30.360 --> 0:38:32.840
<v Speaker 1>layer thing, and I was fine with it. But I

0:38:32.880 --> 0:38:34.880
<v Speaker 1>did tell you, guys. I told Laura and Keisha, and

0:38:34.920 --> 0:38:36.920
<v Speaker 1>they thought it was all a bit weird. No, I

0:38:36.920 --> 0:38:38.440
<v Speaker 1>didn't think that was weird. I think as so much

0:38:38.440 --> 0:38:41.800
<v Speaker 1>time had passed that it wasn't weird. I feel differently

0:38:41.880 --> 0:38:43.560
<v Speaker 1>to you, brit about jewelry, and I think I feel

0:38:43.560 --> 0:38:46.799
<v Speaker 1>differently about it because I mean, I have like a

0:38:46.800 --> 0:38:47.960
<v Speaker 1>real affinity with jewelry.

0:38:47.960 --> 0:38:48.200
<v Speaker 4>Guys.

0:38:48.200 --> 0:38:50.479
<v Speaker 2>That might come as a surprise to you, but I

0:38:50.600 --> 0:38:55.920
<v Speaker 2>understand and know very intimately how much meaning goes into jewelry,

0:38:56.080 --> 0:38:58.520
<v Speaker 2>how much when somebody picks out a piece for someone

0:38:58.520 --> 0:39:01.200
<v Speaker 2>to wear every day, what that meant to them in

0:39:01.280 --> 0:39:04.279
<v Speaker 2>giving that piece to someone as well. Like jewelry is

0:39:04.400 --> 0:39:07.279
<v Speaker 2>unlike any other clothing item, for example, like a pair

0:39:07.320 --> 0:39:10.080
<v Speaker 2>of jeans or a shirt or whatever, it doesn't carry

0:39:10.880 --> 0:39:14.080
<v Speaker 2>meaning like jewelry does. Jewelry can be like an engagement ring,

0:39:14.120 --> 0:39:17.120
<v Speaker 2>which obviously symbolizes marriage. It could be a gift that

0:39:17.160 --> 0:39:21.960
<v Speaker 2>symbolizes your affection for someone. It's a real memory piece

0:39:22.120 --> 0:39:25.480
<v Speaker 2>and so therefore for me I find it very, very different.

0:39:25.880 --> 0:39:27.680
<v Speaker 2>I think that there's different types. I think if it's

0:39:27.719 --> 0:39:31.279
<v Speaker 2>costume jewelry, like just say it's an expensive necklace that

0:39:31.320 --> 0:39:33.160
<v Speaker 2>you pull out once in a blue moon, are you

0:39:33.200 --> 0:39:36.279
<v Speaker 2>allowed to still wear that? Absolutely? If it's like an

0:39:36.360 --> 0:39:39.879
<v Speaker 2>inscribed ring that someone has given you, because if their

0:39:39.960 --> 0:39:43.440
<v Speaker 2>undying love for you, it's fucking weird to still wear it.

0:39:43.719 --> 0:39:45.799
<v Speaker 2>And I don't mean that if you choose to still

0:39:45.840 --> 0:39:48.080
<v Speaker 2>wear it it's because you're still in love with your ex.

0:39:48.440 --> 0:39:50.560
<v Speaker 2>But I do think that it's a little bit potentially

0:39:50.560 --> 0:39:54.480
<v Speaker 2>insensitive to a new partner who might find that intimidating,

0:39:54.800 --> 0:39:57.319
<v Speaker 2>and in this case exactly that like if you're like, well,

0:39:57.320 --> 0:39:59.879
<v Speaker 2>now I can't buy you a ring because your ex

0:40:00.040 --> 0:40:02.160
<v Speaker 2>girlfriend bought you a ring, and then it's like she

0:40:02.239 --> 0:40:03.920
<v Speaker 2>did it first and I don't want to be compared

0:40:03.960 --> 0:40:06.480
<v Speaker 2>to her. I don't know. I just think it makes

0:40:06.560 --> 0:40:09.919
<v Speaker 2>life easier if you leave jewelry that has been brought

0:40:09.920 --> 0:40:12.239
<v Speaker 2>for you by your ex in the past, especially if

0:40:12.280 --> 0:40:13.360
<v Speaker 2>it's an everyday piece.

0:40:13.480 --> 0:40:15.160
<v Speaker 3>Oh look, I agree with you on a lot, but

0:40:15.200 --> 0:40:16.320
<v Speaker 3>I disagreed on a lot.

0:40:16.560 --> 0:40:20.440
<v Speaker 1>I agree that it can be sentimental, and if it

0:40:20.480 --> 0:40:22.960
<v Speaker 1>was an engagement ring, like you got engaged and then

0:40:22.960 --> 0:40:24.200
<v Speaker 1>it went south and you broke up.

0:40:24.600 --> 0:40:27.360
<v Speaker 3>Yes, you can't wear the ring like, that's pretty cooked.

0:40:27.680 --> 0:40:29.839
<v Speaker 1>Wedding rings are same like if you divorce, I don't

0:40:29.840 --> 0:40:32.399
<v Speaker 1>think you need to be keeping that. Maybe, I mean,

0:40:32.480 --> 0:40:34.640
<v Speaker 1>maybe you can melt it down and make it into

0:40:34.640 --> 0:40:36.520
<v Speaker 1>something else. I do know people that have done that,

0:40:36.600 --> 0:40:39.759
<v Speaker 1>because obviously it's a nice, expensive jewelry and then they've

0:40:39.960 --> 0:40:42.920
<v Speaker 1>recreated it into something else. I think that's okay. But

0:40:43.840 --> 0:40:45.680
<v Speaker 1>for me, I mean, I have a necklace that I

0:40:45.760 --> 0:40:48.080
<v Speaker 1>have from an X TOO that I wear sometimes. It's beautiful.

0:40:48.120 --> 0:40:50.400
<v Speaker 1>I love it because I love the necklace. It was

0:40:50.400 --> 0:40:51.240
<v Speaker 1>something I wanted.

0:40:51.560 --> 0:40:54.640
<v Speaker 2>But that necklace is costume jewelry. When I say costume jwey,

0:40:54.680 --> 0:40:56.879
<v Speaker 2>I mean it's occasion where jewelry. You're wearing it out

0:40:56.880 --> 0:40:58.799
<v Speaker 2>for dinner, you're wearing it to an event. Yes, I

0:40:58.840 --> 0:41:01.200
<v Speaker 2>feel very differently about it that I think that's fine.

0:41:01.200 --> 0:41:04.080
<v Speaker 2>So what I'm saying is if it's occasion where jewelry,

0:41:04.440 --> 0:41:06.000
<v Speaker 2>then I don't have an issue with it because you're

0:41:06.040 --> 0:41:08.239
<v Speaker 2>wearing it because you're styling it with an outfit. But

0:41:08.320 --> 0:41:10.440
<v Speaker 2>if it's jewelry that you wear every single day, that

0:41:10.480 --> 0:41:13.239
<v Speaker 2>you never take off. It almost becomes part of your identity,

0:41:13.360 --> 0:41:15.879
<v Speaker 2>Like that's that one thing that never ever comes off

0:41:15.920 --> 0:41:18.800
<v Speaker 2>your body and it was given to you buy your ex.

0:41:19.320 --> 0:41:20.000
<v Speaker 2>I find it weird.

0:41:20.760 --> 0:41:23.080
<v Speaker 1>Well, I think in this case, there's no reason for

0:41:23.280 --> 0:41:25.879
<v Speaker 1>this girl for you, the listener. I don't think there's

0:41:25.880 --> 0:41:28.279
<v Speaker 1>a reason for you to feel uncomfortable about buying him

0:41:28.440 --> 0:41:30.719
<v Speaker 1>a gift and buying him a piece of jewelry, a ring,

0:41:30.800 --> 0:41:33.000
<v Speaker 1>buying whatever you want. He's your partner and it's going

0:41:33.040 --> 0:41:35.239
<v Speaker 1>to be mean something to you, And if you low

0:41:35.320 --> 0:41:35.880
<v Speaker 1>key want to.

0:41:35.880 --> 0:41:38.000
<v Speaker 3>Be replacing what he's wearing, that's okay.

0:41:38.440 --> 0:41:41.200
<v Speaker 1>You can also have a conversation about it and say,

0:41:41.760 --> 0:41:43.839
<v Speaker 1>you know, I got you this ring, but I would

0:41:43.840 --> 0:41:45.080
<v Speaker 1>love it if you would wear it, And how do

0:41:45.120 --> 0:41:47.480
<v Speaker 1>you feel about, you know, swapping it out? You know,

0:41:47.600 --> 0:41:49.200
<v Speaker 1>I sort of look at that ring and think of

0:41:49.480 --> 0:41:51.560
<v Speaker 1>your X. You know, you could almost be just really

0:41:51.560 --> 0:41:53.719
<v Speaker 1>honest that it makes you a bit uncomfortable, especially if

0:41:53.719 --> 0:41:55.719
<v Speaker 1>it was something special between them and you know that.

0:41:56.160 --> 0:41:58.680
<v Speaker 1>But I think go for it, buying whatever you want,

0:41:58.760 --> 0:42:00.000
<v Speaker 1>buying a ring, and see what happened.

0:42:00.600 --> 0:42:02.520
<v Speaker 2>I also think, on top of that, there is no

0:42:02.640 --> 0:42:05.680
<v Speaker 2>shame in saying I know that it means nothing to you,

0:42:05.719 --> 0:42:07.560
<v Speaker 2>but it makes me feel a bit uncomfortable that you're

0:42:07.560 --> 0:42:10.479
<v Speaker 2>wearing it. Totally, But go together and pick out something

0:42:10.480 --> 0:42:12.839
<v Speaker 2>that he likes, because obviously he's got a style. Maybe

0:42:12.880 --> 0:42:14.840
<v Speaker 2>he wants to replace it with something that's similar. The

0:42:14.920 --> 0:42:16.759
<v Speaker 2>last thing you want to do is buy something and

0:42:17.000 --> 0:42:18.840
<v Speaker 2>he doesn't like it as much and then he feels

0:42:18.880 --> 0:42:19.480
<v Speaker 2>forced to wear it.

0:42:19.719 --> 0:42:22.440
<v Speaker 1>That's all totally, and he's like, great, now I've got

0:42:22.480 --> 0:42:23.960
<v Speaker 1>to wear this ugly thing that he doesn't like.

0:42:24.280 --> 0:42:25.839
<v Speaker 3>I think going for it, that's a good idea. Or

0:42:25.880 --> 0:42:27.240
<v Speaker 3>go do it together, but don't.

0:42:27.000 --> 0:42:29.560
<v Speaker 1>Feel bad about buying something just because someone bought him

0:42:29.560 --> 0:42:30.560
<v Speaker 1>something in the past.

0:42:30.760 --> 0:42:32.719
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but I do get it though, Like I mean,

0:42:32.760 --> 0:42:34.879
<v Speaker 2>if I've ever dated a guy and I've found out

0:42:34.920 --> 0:42:37.240
<v Speaker 2>that his ex girlfriend has kind of done or bought

0:42:37.239 --> 0:42:39.560
<v Speaker 2>something that's the same, Like, for example, if Matt's ex

0:42:39.560 --> 0:42:42.239
<v Speaker 2>girlfriend had bought him a ring that was really sentimental

0:42:42.280 --> 0:42:44.799
<v Speaker 2>to them and their relationship, I would feel weird about

0:42:44.800 --> 0:42:46.480
<v Speaker 2>buying Mat a ring. I would feel like I was

0:42:46.520 --> 0:42:48.759
<v Speaker 2>copying something that she did. I would feel like I

0:42:48.800 --> 0:42:51.360
<v Speaker 2>was trying to compete or you know, take that memory.

0:42:51.440 --> 0:42:53.400
<v Speaker 2>I don't know, I understand why. There's a bit of

0:42:53.400 --> 0:42:55.200
<v Speaker 2>a feeling of like, I don't want to repeat the

0:42:55.239 --> 0:42:57.360
<v Speaker 2>same gift. Yes, the gifts are limited. What are you

0:42:57.360 --> 0:42:59.040
<v Speaker 2>going to get? A wallet? A ring?

0:42:59.560 --> 0:43:03.560
<v Speaker 1>A wallet is such a sixteen year old first boyfriend

0:43:03.560 --> 0:43:05.000
<v Speaker 1>gift where you go to the surf shop and get

0:43:05.040 --> 0:43:06.680
<v Speaker 1>like a bill of Wong wallet for their birthday.

0:43:06.880 --> 0:43:08.840
<v Speaker 2>I'm pretty sure I bought Matt wallet for our first

0:43:08.920 --> 0:43:11.040
<v Speaker 2>relationship milestone. I can't remember what it was, but I

0:43:11.080 --> 0:43:11.840
<v Speaker 2>bought him a wallet.

0:43:12.080 --> 0:43:14.320
<v Speaker 3>I almost bought Ben one the other day.

0:43:14.760 --> 0:43:17.640
<v Speaker 2>And wait, to be fair, I bought Matta wallet and

0:43:17.680 --> 0:43:19.520
<v Speaker 2>it was replacing the wallet that he had, which was

0:43:19.560 --> 0:43:21.680
<v Speaker 2>bought for him by his ex girlfriend. So there you go,

0:43:21.800 --> 0:43:22.439
<v Speaker 2>paul A move.

0:43:22.520 --> 0:43:23.839
<v Speaker 3>So there you go. You did do it.

0:43:24.040 --> 0:43:25.919
<v Speaker 2>Yeah I did, and he loves it and he still

0:43:25.920 --> 0:43:26.439
<v Speaker 2>wears that wallet.

0:43:26.480 --> 0:43:27.480
<v Speaker 3>Where's it uses it?

0:43:27.520 --> 0:43:29.239
<v Speaker 2>And who knows where the ex girlfriend wallet is?

0:43:29.400 --> 0:43:32.080
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, well we do know because you burnt it.

0:43:32.840 --> 0:43:35.359
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it's in the ground in your backyard, brit That's

0:43:35.400 --> 0:43:38.040
<v Speaker 2>where it is. Anyway, guys, that is it from us.

0:43:38.080 --> 0:43:40.560
<v Speaker 2>We hope that you love the episode, enjoyed Matt making

0:43:40.640 --> 0:43:43.759
<v Speaker 2>a little rendezvous on today's EPP Go and join the

0:43:43.960 --> 0:43:46.040
<v Speaker 2>life on Cart discussion group. You can also find us

0:43:46.120 --> 0:43:48.200
<v Speaker 2>on Instagram at life on Cart podcast.

0:43:48.560 --> 0:43:49.319
<v Speaker 3>And you know the drill.

0:43:49.520 --> 0:43:50.960
<v Speaker 1>So your mum tell you, Dad, tell you Doug, tell

0:43:50.960 --> 0:43:53.719
<v Speaker 1>your friends and share the love because we will.

0:44:00.160 --> 0:44:05.279
<v Speaker 3>Cut the boy, the cut of.

0:44:06.760 --> 0:44:09.880
<v Speaker 4>The boy at

0:44:12.120 --> 0:44:16.200
<v Speaker 3>That day, their day,