1 00:00:02,440 --> 00:00:02,760 Speaker 1: Get A. 2 00:00:03,400 --> 00:00:10,200 Speaker 2: I'm Laala Berry, nutritionist, author, actor, TV presenter, and professional oversharer. 3 00:00:10,800 --> 00:00:15,680 Speaker 3: This podcast is all about celebrating failure because I believe 4 00:00:15,720 --> 00:00:19,000 Speaker 3: it's a chance for us to learn, grow and face 5 00:00:19,040 --> 00:00:23,160 Speaker 3: our blind spots. Each week I'll interview a different guest 6 00:00:23,200 --> 00:00:26,599 Speaker 3: about their highs as well as their lows, all in 7 00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:34,360 Speaker 3: a bid to inspire us to fearlessly fail. Get A 8 00:00:34,560 --> 00:00:37,120 Speaker 3: and welcome to the pod. Today, we've got Tully Smython. 9 00:00:37,240 --> 00:00:40,120 Speaker 3: She's a digital creator. She's got her own pod called 10 00:00:40,159 --> 00:00:43,280 Speaker 3: too Much Tully. You will know her from Big Brother. 11 00:00:43,479 --> 00:00:47,760 Speaker 3: She's an ambassador for a gazillion different things, study journalism 12 00:00:47,880 --> 00:00:50,959 Speaker 3: and writing and you know what, we actually ned out 13 00:00:50,960 --> 00:00:56,280 Speaker 3: a bit about being bookworms and reading and fiction versus nonfiction. 14 00:00:56,720 --> 00:00:58,760 Speaker 3: And I hope you love this chat. As you know 15 00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:03,080 Speaker 3: if you've listened anything with Tully before, she's very vulnerable. 16 00:01:03,360 --> 00:01:06,400 Speaker 3: She's quite an open book. So it should just feel 17 00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:08,800 Speaker 3: like a little chit chat with your mate. So enjoy 18 00:01:08,840 --> 00:01:11,360 Speaker 3: this app. Thank you so much Tully for jumping on 19 00:01:11,360 --> 00:01:15,640 Speaker 3: the pod, long time in the making. Welcome to the pod, 20 00:01:15,840 --> 00:01:18,000 Speaker 3: Tully Smith. I feel like we've been talking about this 21 00:01:18,040 --> 00:01:18,720 Speaker 3: for a little while. 22 00:01:18,959 --> 00:01:20,600 Speaker 1: No, I was just saying that I've offended. 23 00:01:20,600 --> 00:01:22,280 Speaker 2: It's taking you this long to ask me out, like 24 00:01:22,319 --> 00:01:25,240 Speaker 2: on the podcast, No, but. 25 00:01:25,240 --> 00:01:25,920 Speaker 1: I asked you. 26 00:01:25,959 --> 00:01:27,560 Speaker 3: I think I was in lay when I tried to 27 00:01:27,560 --> 00:01:28,720 Speaker 3: get you on the pod, and I. 28 00:01:28,680 --> 00:01:31,200 Speaker 2: Was like, yes, yeah, now your time and place, I'm here, 29 00:01:31,280 --> 00:01:32,679 Speaker 2: I'm available whatever you like. 30 00:01:32,840 --> 00:01:35,760 Speaker 3: So we finally making it happen the Tully Smith Digital 31 00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:38,840 Speaker 3: Creator podcast of Too Much Chuli, which Matt edits my 32 00:01:38,920 --> 00:01:39,600 Speaker 3: boyfriend edit. 33 00:01:39,640 --> 00:01:40,360 Speaker 1: So I feel like I. 34 00:01:40,319 --> 00:01:43,039 Speaker 2: Get to know you because I hear your voice because 35 00:01:43,040 --> 00:01:44,679 Speaker 2: he's always how annoying? 36 00:01:44,800 --> 00:01:47,400 Speaker 1: Is it so nasally and journalist jealous? 37 00:01:47,600 --> 00:01:48,240 Speaker 3: Degree made? 38 00:01:48,320 --> 00:01:49,600 Speaker 1: You know? Is that? 39 00:01:49,840 --> 00:01:52,560 Speaker 2: And I feel like that's my biggest, sort of my 40 00:01:52,640 --> 00:01:54,720 Speaker 2: proudest moment is graduating from Union. I was the first 41 00:01:54,760 --> 00:01:57,320 Speaker 2: one for my family to do it, so it means 42 00:01:57,360 --> 00:01:58,640 Speaker 2: a lot to me. I really wanted to go and 43 00:01:58,640 --> 00:02:00,040 Speaker 2: work in magazines. I don't get. 44 00:02:00,360 --> 00:02:01,560 Speaker 3: Yeah, it was such a thing. 45 00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:05,280 Speaker 2: You know, our generation and I age and everyoneted to 46 00:02:05,320 --> 00:02:06,120 Speaker 2: work in magazines. 47 00:02:06,320 --> 00:02:08,720 Speaker 1: So yeah, tracks, but this is a thing. 48 00:02:08,800 --> 00:02:11,200 Speaker 3: I've always known. You're a bookworm because I follow you 49 00:02:11,400 --> 00:02:13,600 Speaker 3: on Intergram. You've got as a young blood book. 50 00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:15,160 Speaker 1: Oh that's just like young blood. 51 00:02:15,320 --> 00:02:17,000 Speaker 2: I don't know why I started a tumble I was 52 00:02:17,040 --> 00:02:19,840 Speaker 2: a toddler girl, and that was young Blood runs Wild. 53 00:02:20,440 --> 00:02:21,840 Speaker 2: And then when I guess I came out of Big 54 00:02:21,880 --> 00:02:23,920 Speaker 2: Brother and I was sort of using Instagram more, I 55 00:02:23,919 --> 00:02:26,079 Speaker 2: was like, I need a hashtag, but it makes no sense, 56 00:02:26,080 --> 00:02:27,000 Speaker 2: it doesn't apply to anyone. 57 00:02:27,080 --> 00:02:27,880 Speaker 1: I'm what young. 58 00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:31,040 Speaker 2: Blood, I'm like, you know, medium old blood. I don't 59 00:02:31,040 --> 00:02:33,280 Speaker 2: know what I am like stale blood runs well, you 60 00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:35,760 Speaker 2: are not stale blood at all, my friend. But do 61 00:02:35,800 --> 00:02:37,760 Speaker 2: you know so I figured out my first ever memory 62 00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:40,440 Speaker 2: of you, and you will not remember me because you 63 00:02:40,480 --> 00:02:42,720 Speaker 2: hadn't met me at this stage, but I used to 64 00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:46,800 Speaker 2: live on this apartment in Darling Street, South Yarra. 65 00:02:48,320 --> 00:02:51,200 Speaker 1: I know that street. Well, so you just got off Big. 66 00:02:51,080 --> 00:02:54,400 Speaker 3: Brother Mark one, and I remember I had a massive 67 00:02:54,400 --> 00:02:57,080 Speaker 3: crush on Sorry boss. My boyfriends in the room as 68 00:02:57,080 --> 00:02:59,160 Speaker 3: we recalled this Andrew, when I watched your brother and 69 00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:01,040 Speaker 3: I was like, oh god, I think he lives next 70 00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:05,360 Speaker 3: door to me. And I'd see you Jazz Jazz Andrew 71 00:03:05,480 --> 00:03:07,320 Speaker 3: all chilling and hanging out because I was like, oh, 72 00:03:07,360 --> 00:03:10,440 Speaker 3: that's the famous three. Yeah, And that was my first 73 00:03:10,480 --> 00:03:12,480 Speaker 3: memory of you. I'd be because literally I was next 74 00:03:12,520 --> 00:03:12,960 Speaker 3: door neighbor. 75 00:03:13,160 --> 00:03:15,280 Speaker 2: Yeah, he was on Darling Street. So that's where i'd 76 00:03:15,280 --> 00:03:17,480 Speaker 2: stay when I was in Melbourne. How funny, wild, I 77 00:03:17,560 --> 00:03:19,560 Speaker 2: can't dive past that street now I got PTSD. 78 00:03:19,760 --> 00:03:21,760 Speaker 3: Oh no, that's fair, that's fair. Back and forth, but 79 00:03:21,840 --> 00:03:24,360 Speaker 3: how interesting. So and then I think I properly met you, 80 00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:25,480 Speaker 3: maybe like a year later. 81 00:03:25,760 --> 00:03:28,280 Speaker 2: Yeah, I remember thinking you were just this huge deal 82 00:03:28,960 --> 00:03:30,760 Speaker 2: because at the time that we met, you were like 83 00:03:30,880 --> 00:03:33,080 Speaker 2: you owned like a yoga studio. You were doing so 84 00:03:33,160 --> 00:03:36,080 Speaker 2: many things like to me, I thought you were this 85 00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:39,760 Speaker 2: like nutritionalist, cookbook person that owned it, that owned a 86 00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:42,000 Speaker 2: yoga studio but also made like a sight he bowls 87 00:03:42,040 --> 00:03:45,000 Speaker 2: maybe and smooth yes, like you just doing so many 88 00:03:45,080 --> 00:03:47,240 Speaker 2: different things, jumbling so many different balls. I was like, 89 00:03:47,280 --> 00:03:50,000 Speaker 2: this chick's like massive, and all my friends knew you. 90 00:03:50,080 --> 00:03:52,960 Speaker 2: Jazz knew you really, and you'd wear like merch and 91 00:03:52,960 --> 00:03:54,280 Speaker 2: you're always of merch. 92 00:03:54,680 --> 00:03:55,080 Speaker 1: But it was. 93 00:03:55,080 --> 00:03:57,880 Speaker 2: Presenting and giving like talks. Actually, I saw you give 94 00:03:57,920 --> 00:04:00,360 Speaker 2: a talk. We were close. I swee you to talk 95 00:04:00,360 --> 00:04:03,560 Speaker 2: about one of your books, and you were so candid 96 00:04:03,560 --> 00:04:06,080 Speaker 2: and raw and vulnerable that I related to it because 97 00:04:06,120 --> 00:04:10,440 Speaker 2: I'm like that I fucked up guys, like, sorry about it, 98 00:04:10,480 --> 00:04:12,560 Speaker 2: but I'm human and you're talking about maybe one of 99 00:04:12,600 --> 00:04:14,600 Speaker 2: your earlier books where the title got you in trouble. 100 00:04:14,720 --> 00:04:14,920 Speaker 3: Yeah. 101 00:04:15,040 --> 00:04:17,320 Speaker 2: Yes, it was called The Stop Being a Fat Bitch? Yeses, 102 00:04:17,480 --> 00:04:19,120 Speaker 2: and she was about myself. 103 00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:21,159 Speaker 1: Yes, And I found that I loved that chat. That 104 00:04:21,240 --> 00:04:21,920 Speaker 1: was really interesting. 105 00:04:22,760 --> 00:04:25,680 Speaker 3: How funny? Yeah, that we've both got funny first memories 106 00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:27,279 Speaker 3: of each other. Okay, I can't have you on without 107 00:04:27,320 --> 00:04:29,520 Speaker 3: talking about Big Brother. I want to get into the 108 00:04:29,680 --> 00:04:32,920 Speaker 3: writing the book stuff because I'm such a freaking book nerd. 109 00:04:33,320 --> 00:04:35,960 Speaker 3: But what made you want to So there was a 110 00:04:36,080 --> 00:04:39,440 Speaker 3: nine year hiatus obviously, so Mark one, we'll call it 111 00:04:39,440 --> 00:04:42,080 Speaker 3: Big Brother. Mike, Well, what made you want to be? Like, 112 00:04:42,240 --> 00:04:43,240 Speaker 3: I'm going to do this thing? 113 00:04:43,480 --> 00:04:47,400 Speaker 2: I loved the show from the very first season. 114 00:04:47,480 --> 00:04:48,840 Speaker 1: I was so enamored with it. 115 00:04:48,920 --> 00:04:51,040 Speaker 2: I wasn't allowed to watch it, especially like the naughty 116 00:04:51,120 --> 00:04:53,599 Speaker 2: up late, you know, the dirty nudy scene. 117 00:04:54,200 --> 00:04:55,880 Speaker 1: Wasn't allowed to watch it, but I would. 118 00:04:55,600 --> 00:04:57,880 Speaker 2: Sneak downstairs, put the TV on as low as it 119 00:04:57,880 --> 00:05:00,360 Speaker 2: could go, with like one decimal up, and I would 120 00:05:00,360 --> 00:05:03,760 Speaker 2: sit sort of nose to the screen, sneakily watching it 121 00:05:03,839 --> 00:05:06,000 Speaker 2: late at night. And this was back when they had 122 00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:08,480 Speaker 2: the live streams as well, So I would also log 123 00:05:08,520 --> 00:05:12,040 Speaker 2: in you dial up internet, be sitting there watching them 124 00:05:12,080 --> 00:05:14,280 Speaker 2: sleep and eat, and I just found up fascinating. I 125 00:05:14,320 --> 00:05:17,640 Speaker 2: remember when the first series ended and the finally happened 126 00:05:17,680 --> 00:05:19,120 Speaker 2: and the winner was announced and there was you know, 127 00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:21,920 Speaker 2: streamers and confetti and Greta Colleen was waiting goodbye to 128 00:05:21,960 --> 00:05:26,240 Speaker 2: the cameras. I felt this immense sense of loss. I 129 00:05:26,240 --> 00:05:28,800 Speaker 2: felt I had lost a bunch of my friends. Oh wo, 130 00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:32,880 Speaker 2: and I remember being really upset about it for days. 131 00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:35,400 Speaker 1: I felt like, cause social media didn't exist back there. 132 00:05:35,360 --> 00:05:38,080 Speaker 3: That's was about to say, this was our first taste 133 00:05:37,640 --> 00:05:40,360 Speaker 3: that reality. Really yeah, And I thought they I'd made 134 00:05:40,360 --> 00:05:42,600 Speaker 3: a bunch of new friends and I was really invested 135 00:05:42,600 --> 00:05:45,280 Speaker 3: in their lives, and because social media wasn't a thing, 136 00:05:45,360 --> 00:05:47,000 Speaker 3: I wasn't able to keep track of what they were 137 00:05:47,040 --> 00:05:49,080 Speaker 3: up to afterwards, and I missed them. 138 00:05:49,480 --> 00:05:50,160 Speaker 1: Of course. 139 00:05:51,520 --> 00:05:51,640 Speaker 3: No. 140 00:05:51,720 --> 00:05:53,520 Speaker 2: I dated someone that was on the second one, and 141 00:05:53,560 --> 00:05:55,800 Speaker 2: there was no social media then at all. 142 00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:57,640 Speaker 1: Nothing. It was such a. 143 00:05:57,600 --> 00:05:59,760 Speaker 3: Different ball game. And it was when Rove was still around. 144 00:06:00,080 --> 00:06:00,800 Speaker 1: Up you go and roll. 145 00:06:00,960 --> 00:06:03,560 Speaker 3: That was what you do do, the Rove circuit, and 146 00:06:03,560 --> 00:06:07,680 Speaker 3: that'd be kind of so maybe some nightclubs, yeah, you 147 00:06:07,839 --> 00:06:09,960 Speaker 3: go to life that was a thing too, would like 148 00:06:10,080 --> 00:06:12,000 Speaker 3: you'd go all the way out to like the country 149 00:06:12,040 --> 00:06:14,560 Speaker 3: clubs and paid amazing pay. 150 00:06:14,680 --> 00:06:15,440 Speaker 1: They were celebrities. 151 00:06:15,480 --> 00:06:18,040 Speaker 2: I mean, The Brother was the first kind of really big, 152 00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:22,400 Speaker 2: universally loved, really TV show we had come and it 153 00:06:22,520 --> 00:06:24,760 Speaker 2: was just a bunch of strangers living in a house together, 154 00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:28,000 Speaker 2: and I really loved that social I mean, as a kid, 155 00:06:28,080 --> 00:06:30,480 Speaker 2: I played The Sims on my computer right got a 156 00:06:30,480 --> 00:06:33,520 Speaker 2: mad fan. I once played it so much that I 157 00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:36,440 Speaker 2: made myself vomit because it was all moving too fast 158 00:06:36,440 --> 00:06:37,720 Speaker 2: and I was playing it for so many hours that 159 00:06:37,760 --> 00:06:38,600 Speaker 2: I actually spewed. 160 00:06:39,360 --> 00:06:41,760 Speaker 3: I never heard that story, like I've never had to 161 00:06:41,760 --> 00:06:42,880 Speaker 3: watch the sickness. 162 00:06:42,480 --> 00:06:43,919 Speaker 1: From playing the Sims too much. 163 00:06:44,440 --> 00:06:46,080 Speaker 3: And it was kind of like real life version of 164 00:06:46,120 --> 00:06:46,800 Speaker 3: the Sims. 165 00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:47,880 Speaker 1: So I loved it. 166 00:06:47,920 --> 00:06:50,119 Speaker 2: I was a huge fan, and as I got older, 167 00:06:50,120 --> 00:06:51,760 Speaker 2: I was was always a bit of a show pony. 168 00:06:51,760 --> 00:06:54,840 Speaker 2: I know, shock you know. I did drama camp at 169 00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:57,680 Speaker 2: school and yeah, I could see acting for sure. Yeah, 170 00:06:57,720 --> 00:06:59,600 Speaker 2: And so people said, oh, you should go and a 171 00:06:59,640 --> 00:07:02,000 Speaker 2: big brother, and I always thought, you know, no, no, 172 00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:03,840 Speaker 2: no no no, I'll never get on. And I'm not 173 00:07:03,880 --> 00:07:08,000 Speaker 2: a very good I don't like being bad at things. Like, 174 00:07:08,080 --> 00:07:10,160 Speaker 2: if I don't think I'm going to be amazing at it, yeah, 175 00:07:10,200 --> 00:07:11,000 Speaker 2: I don't want to do it. 176 00:07:11,080 --> 00:07:11,880 Speaker 3: Yeah that's truck. 177 00:07:12,320 --> 00:07:15,520 Speaker 2: So I didn't want to try get my hopes up 178 00:07:15,520 --> 00:07:18,840 Speaker 2: and then we disappoint it. But then it was all 179 00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:20,880 Speaker 2: canceled for a bit as well. Once I brought it back, 180 00:07:20,880 --> 00:07:23,040 Speaker 2: I watched the first series and Channel nine. I love 181 00:07:23,080 --> 00:07:24,480 Speaker 2: what they've done with it. They'd kind of gone back 182 00:07:24,520 --> 00:07:27,640 Speaker 2: to its roots where there were no neody sex scenes 183 00:07:27,680 --> 00:07:29,960 Speaker 2: and no like showers. It was just kind of good 184 00:07:29,960 --> 00:07:32,600 Speaker 2: old family fun and I loved it so much that 185 00:07:32,680 --> 00:07:35,040 Speaker 2: I applied second time around. 186 00:07:35,240 --> 00:07:38,160 Speaker 3: Yeah do you remember the moment you got it? I do? 187 00:07:38,320 --> 00:07:39,000 Speaker 3: Can you share it? 188 00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:42,600 Speaker 1: I was working advertising, hating my job. 189 00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:44,720 Speaker 2: I was inherently good at it because I was working 190 00:07:44,960 --> 00:07:46,920 Speaker 2: in social media and that was kind of when the 191 00:07:46,920 --> 00:07:48,880 Speaker 2: big boom was happening, but I didn't love it. And 192 00:07:49,720 --> 00:07:52,480 Speaker 2: I'd gone to these auditions and I just killed every 193 00:07:52,520 --> 00:07:53,119 Speaker 2: single round. 194 00:07:53,680 --> 00:07:56,880 Speaker 3: And I wasn't trying person yeah, person okay. 195 00:07:56,680 --> 00:07:58,840 Speaker 2: And I wasn't trying to kill it. I wasn't trying 196 00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:01,800 Speaker 2: very hard. In fact, I almost doing the opposite, which 197 00:08:01,800 --> 00:08:04,160 Speaker 2: made me stand out. So I remember, like, in the 198 00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:06,960 Speaker 2: audition process, you know, you had people trying to be 199 00:08:07,040 --> 00:08:10,400 Speaker 2: the biggest, loudest, funniest in the room, and it made 200 00:08:10,400 --> 00:08:13,400 Speaker 2: me embarrassed, like was cringing, got it? So instead of 201 00:08:13,400 --> 00:08:17,560 Speaker 2: doing that, I was actually aloof I sat back, a 202 00:08:17,640 --> 00:08:19,160 Speaker 2: bit too cool for school, a bit. 203 00:08:19,120 --> 00:08:20,880 Speaker 1: Like what the fuck am I even doing here? 204 00:08:21,160 --> 00:08:25,560 Speaker 2: Vibes to the point where they said, hey, number three, one, four, 205 00:08:25,600 --> 00:08:28,160 Speaker 2: eight two, you know you haven't said anything, you know, 206 00:08:28,200 --> 00:08:30,520 Speaker 2: do you have something to offer? This is a producer, 207 00:08:30,680 --> 00:08:32,840 Speaker 2: And I said, I just find this whole thing really 208 00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:35,440 Speaker 2: awkward and embarrassing, and everyone's trying way too hard and 209 00:08:35,440 --> 00:08:36,000 Speaker 2: I don't want. 210 00:08:35,840 --> 00:08:38,920 Speaker 3: To do it. And that would have been like yes, yeah. 211 00:08:38,960 --> 00:08:41,720 Speaker 2: So I just kept smashing the audition rounds and I 212 00:08:41,760 --> 00:08:43,360 Speaker 2: just had a feeling I could see how much they 213 00:08:43,360 --> 00:08:45,959 Speaker 2: were loving me, you know, I was. I just was 214 00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:49,120 Speaker 2: giving them a bit of sass. I wasn't playing up 215 00:08:49,160 --> 00:08:51,000 Speaker 2: to them. I wasn't trying too hard. 216 00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:52,720 Speaker 3: But that's an archetype you need. 217 00:08:52,920 --> 00:08:53,280 Speaker 1: Of course. 218 00:08:53,320 --> 00:08:55,200 Speaker 2: I look at of course, you know, and I was 219 00:08:55,240 --> 00:08:58,400 Speaker 2: this like edgy, like, you know, I was wearing leather 220 00:08:58,480 --> 00:09:00,680 Speaker 2: skirt and like kicks, and they had like my nose 221 00:09:00,760 --> 00:09:03,800 Speaker 2: pears and purple tips of my hair and I dated 222 00:09:03,840 --> 00:09:06,040 Speaker 2: girls at the time, so that was, you know, a 223 00:09:06,080 --> 00:09:09,800 Speaker 2: great draw card. But I was at my office and 224 00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:11,880 Speaker 2: i'd kind of been arming and a ring that had 225 00:09:11,880 --> 00:09:14,080 Speaker 2: a few follow up calls of producers and they're like, look, 226 00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:15,720 Speaker 2: you know we will need to film backstories. 227 00:09:15,760 --> 00:09:17,720 Speaker 1: Are Uchini free on these dates? And I was like, mm, 228 00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:19,160 Speaker 1: I don't know. 229 00:09:19,280 --> 00:09:20,760 Speaker 2: Hey, like, I don't know if I'm going to do it, 230 00:09:21,640 --> 00:09:23,720 Speaker 2: and you know, I just got a new house, a 231 00:09:23,760 --> 00:09:26,320 Speaker 2: new puppy, and I was scared. 232 00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:28,280 Speaker 1: Your puppy is called Luna. 233 00:09:28,240 --> 00:09:31,920 Speaker 2: Yeah, memory or good researching, and I just kind of 234 00:09:31,920 --> 00:09:34,280 Speaker 2: felt like it was I was it was a big risk. 235 00:09:34,360 --> 00:09:36,680 Speaker 2: You know, really TV is a really big risk. You 236 00:09:36,679 --> 00:09:38,120 Speaker 2: don't know how it's going to go down. You don't 237 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:40,520 Speaker 2: know how you're going to be edited and portrayed and 238 00:09:40,559 --> 00:09:44,600 Speaker 2: then perceived. And I was scared. But the executive producer, 239 00:09:44,720 --> 00:09:47,480 Speaker 2: Alex Mehbrodac has called me and he's kind of this 240 00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:50,640 Speaker 2: gruff English guy, you know, he loves a dar he's 241 00:09:50,640 --> 00:09:53,040 Speaker 2: always drinking cokes ere he now does I'm a celebrity, 242 00:09:53,080 --> 00:09:55,400 Speaker 2: get me out of here and Love Island Australia. So 243 00:09:55,440 --> 00:09:59,000 Speaker 2: he's still making great reality TV. And he called me, 244 00:09:59,040 --> 00:10:01,520 Speaker 2: and he said, listen, I hear that, you know, I 245 00:10:01,559 --> 00:10:03,120 Speaker 2: hear that you're arming and ring and kind of wasting 246 00:10:03,120 --> 00:10:05,640 Speaker 2: our time. He was like, look, we have you know, 247 00:10:06,080 --> 00:10:08,720 Speaker 2: X amount of thousands of people that have tried to audition, 248 00:10:09,040 --> 00:10:10,800 Speaker 2: who would kill three on the show, who would give 249 00:10:10,800 --> 00:10:13,120 Speaker 2: their left foot to do it, And you're going back 250 00:10:13,160 --> 00:10:15,280 Speaker 2: and forth, arming an r and not giving us any decisions, 251 00:10:15,280 --> 00:10:16,960 Speaker 2: and you're really wasting our time. So what's it going 252 00:10:16,960 --> 00:10:19,920 Speaker 2: to be. I need to know right now. And he said, 253 00:10:19,960 --> 00:10:22,079 Speaker 2: if you didn't want to do it, you wouldn't keep 254 00:10:22,120 --> 00:10:24,800 Speaker 2: going through with the rounds, right like, you keep showing up, 255 00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:28,040 Speaker 2: you keep answering the phone, you keep giving us information. 256 00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:30,559 Speaker 2: And he kind of put me on the spot. And 257 00:10:30,600 --> 00:10:33,280 Speaker 2: I was crouched under a desk hiding in like a 258 00:10:33,320 --> 00:10:38,280 Speaker 2: meeting room, and they eat to know now, and I said, yeah, 259 00:10:38,280 --> 00:10:40,280 Speaker 2: all right, fine, yeah, yeah, fuck it, I'll do it, 260 00:10:40,320 --> 00:10:42,640 Speaker 2: and he goes good because you're in. 261 00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:46,520 Speaker 3: Interesting that the EP called you, that's not that's not no. 262 00:10:46,559 --> 00:10:48,040 Speaker 2: Well I know now that that meant that I was 263 00:10:48,080 --> 00:10:50,880 Speaker 2: definitely in and I was absolutely a favorite, but at 264 00:10:50,880 --> 00:10:53,800 Speaker 2: the time I didn't really know better. Wow, So yeah 265 00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:55,480 Speaker 2: I had to and I got a month. I got 266 00:10:55,480 --> 00:10:58,080 Speaker 2: an extra month leadway to the other housemates because they 267 00:10:58,160 --> 00:11:01,080 Speaker 2: knew that with my mum still being around and her 268 00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:03,480 Speaker 2: being ill, I needed to get a few ducks in 269 00:11:03,520 --> 00:11:06,200 Speaker 2: a row. So I actually got longer lead time than 270 00:11:06,240 --> 00:11:07,080 Speaker 2: the other housemates. 271 00:11:07,880 --> 00:11:11,800 Speaker 3: Oh mate, okay, okay, so many questions about So that 272 00:11:11,840 --> 00:11:13,840 Speaker 3: would have been such a surreal experience that would have 273 00:11:13,880 --> 00:11:16,280 Speaker 3: changed your life. Yeah, let's call a spader spade here. 274 00:11:16,880 --> 00:11:20,040 Speaker 3: And then I think I'm trying to think how long 275 00:11:20,040 --> 00:11:21,280 Speaker 3: afterward when I got to like. 276 00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:22,880 Speaker 2: Know you, But you were I remember when I was 277 00:11:22,880 --> 00:11:25,240 Speaker 2: in Melbourne, you were like the Melbourne girl because you're 278 00:11:25,320 --> 00:11:28,000 Speaker 2: originally kids, right, yeah, and you're kind of the eat 279 00:11:28,000 --> 00:11:28,840 Speaker 2: girl of Melbourne. 280 00:11:29,120 --> 00:11:30,520 Speaker 3: And if I was ever an event, I was like, 281 00:11:30,520 --> 00:11:31,040 Speaker 3: where's tale? 282 00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:33,120 Speaker 1: I know, you know, like not hard to spot me. 283 00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:35,319 Speaker 2: He looked straight through the crowd of the tallest person. 284 00:11:35,080 --> 00:11:38,080 Speaker 3: By the by the tallest But like, what kind of 285 00:11:38,120 --> 00:11:41,240 Speaker 3: things happened post that that you loved and what kind 286 00:11:41,240 --> 00:11:43,320 Speaker 3: of things happened post that that you hated? Because like, 287 00:11:43,440 --> 00:11:45,520 Speaker 3: let's also call a spader spade, you were judged. 288 00:11:45,800 --> 00:11:48,920 Speaker 2: Yeah, well I fucked up, Like I made a monumental 289 00:11:48,960 --> 00:11:52,480 Speaker 2: mistake in the house I did something that I'd never 290 00:11:52,520 --> 00:11:55,680 Speaker 2: done before. I was unfaithful, you know, I cheated on 291 00:11:55,679 --> 00:11:58,839 Speaker 2: my partner at the time, and it was a really 292 00:11:58,840 --> 00:12:01,800 Speaker 2: bitter pill of swallow because I had no one else 293 00:12:01,840 --> 00:12:03,559 Speaker 2: to blame, you know. I think when I came out 294 00:12:03,559 --> 00:12:06,480 Speaker 2: of the house, all my loved ones, bless them, were 295 00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:09,200 Speaker 2: so ready to blame editing, blame producers, and I had 296 00:12:09,240 --> 00:12:10,600 Speaker 2: to come out and just own my shit. 297 00:12:10,679 --> 00:12:13,880 Speaker 1: And I said, I made a mistake, I fucked up. 298 00:12:13,920 --> 00:12:16,840 Speaker 2: I hurt someone that I loved very much, And it 299 00:12:16,880 --> 00:12:18,680 Speaker 2: was like sort of the first time in my life 300 00:12:18,720 --> 00:12:21,160 Speaker 2: where I had made such a huge mistake that really 301 00:12:21,160 --> 00:12:23,960 Speaker 2: affected my entire life, and I had to just sit 302 00:12:24,000 --> 00:12:28,720 Speaker 2: with it. And looking back, it was a really duk period. 303 00:12:29,640 --> 00:12:33,120 Speaker 2: I felt like I'd lost everything, you know. I felt 304 00:12:33,160 --> 00:12:39,319 Speaker 2: like I'd lost the country's respect, I'd lost my relationship, 305 00:12:40,559 --> 00:12:42,720 Speaker 2: you know, she'd moved out of my apartner with my 306 00:12:42,800 --> 00:12:44,160 Speaker 2: dog and the furniture. 307 00:12:44,200 --> 00:12:44,360 Speaker 1: You know. 308 00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:46,120 Speaker 2: I came back to my house and I was on 309 00:12:46,160 --> 00:12:47,760 Speaker 2: the floor eating pizza by myself. 310 00:12:48,520 --> 00:12:49,760 Speaker 1: It was a really. 311 00:12:49,440 --> 00:12:54,160 Speaker 2: Humbling experience, really humbling to fuck up so badly. As 312 00:12:54,240 --> 00:12:56,440 Speaker 2: hard enough as it is to go through that, but 313 00:12:56,480 --> 00:12:59,600 Speaker 2: to have the whole country watch and then make their judgments. 314 00:13:00,320 --> 00:13:02,160 Speaker 2: You know, I was dealing with so much the gain 315 00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:04,600 Speaker 2: lesbian the quick community felt really let down by me. 316 00:13:05,200 --> 00:13:08,320 Speaker 2: I didn't realize that i'd unknownly become this poster child 317 00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:12,439 Speaker 2: for bisexual women because there wasn't a lot of representation. 318 00:13:12,040 --> 00:13:13,120 Speaker 3: Especially nine years ago. 319 00:13:13,720 --> 00:13:15,440 Speaker 2: So they were so excited for me, and I just 320 00:13:15,440 --> 00:13:18,760 Speaker 2: went and sucked it all up. And whilst I didn't 321 00:13:18,760 --> 00:13:20,960 Speaker 2: put my hand up and I didn't ever claim to 322 00:13:20,960 --> 00:13:25,439 Speaker 2: be a role model, I felt an immense sense of disappointment, 323 00:13:25,480 --> 00:13:27,240 Speaker 2: like I'd let a lot of people down, not just 324 00:13:27,559 --> 00:13:30,960 Speaker 2: me and my partner at the time, but the community, 325 00:13:31,120 --> 00:13:31,839 Speaker 2: the country. 326 00:13:32,720 --> 00:13:35,160 Speaker 3: And I was young, That's what I was about to say. 327 00:13:35,480 --> 00:13:38,400 Speaker 3: In mid twenties. We ever like that is what we do. 328 00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:41,199 Speaker 3: You learn, but you just don't usually do it on 329 00:13:41,240 --> 00:13:45,560 Speaker 3: a stage where people can see and judge. And you know, 330 00:13:45,720 --> 00:13:47,760 Speaker 3: did people because I know when you were talking about 331 00:13:47,760 --> 00:13:49,160 Speaker 3: when I bought that diet plan out that had a 332 00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:50,800 Speaker 3: bad name, people would walk up to me and say 333 00:13:51,280 --> 00:13:53,280 Speaker 3: safe in the street, and there was a hashtag bin 334 00:13:53,360 --> 00:13:55,480 Speaker 3: the berry, and like photos of my books in bins 335 00:13:55,480 --> 00:13:57,880 Speaker 3: and stuff was there were people. 336 00:13:57,600 --> 00:13:58,920 Speaker 1: Like, oh yeah, coming up. 337 00:13:59,440 --> 00:14:02,520 Speaker 2: I lived in town in Sydney, which is a great era, 338 00:14:02,640 --> 00:14:04,840 Speaker 2: but also, you know, a really which is why I 339 00:14:04,880 --> 00:14:10,560 Speaker 2: lived there, a really beautiful gay, lesbian queer community LGBTQIA 340 00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:15,360 Speaker 2: plus community. So what was once a really beautiful safe 341 00:14:15,360 --> 00:14:18,160 Speaker 2: space for me to live became quite an unsafe space 342 00:14:18,160 --> 00:14:18,640 Speaker 2: for me to live. 343 00:14:18,679 --> 00:14:20,320 Speaker 1: And I was being called names in the street. 344 00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:23,200 Speaker 2: I was called a cunt once, I had someone scream 345 00:14:23,240 --> 00:14:27,640 Speaker 2: out homewrecker at me from a car. I had a 346 00:14:27,640 --> 00:14:29,760 Speaker 2: plastic bottle thrown at my head at a club once, 347 00:14:30,920 --> 00:14:36,040 Speaker 2: but obviously online it was ten billion times worse online. Okay, 348 00:14:36,120 --> 00:14:38,000 Speaker 2: So to flip all of that on its head, what 349 00:14:38,120 --> 00:14:40,760 Speaker 2: was something that came from that experience that you're grateful 350 00:14:40,800 --> 00:14:45,320 Speaker 2: for so much? It was such a pivotal moment in 351 00:14:45,360 --> 00:14:48,280 Speaker 2: my life. Everything changed, As you said, it was this 352 00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:52,320 Speaker 2: real sort of watershed moment of so many things. I 353 00:14:52,440 --> 00:14:56,800 Speaker 2: moved to Melbourne, I lost my other relationships, so I'd 354 00:14:56,800 --> 00:14:59,280 Speaker 2: gone from having sort of two partners and unofficially to 355 00:14:59,320 --> 00:15:02,080 Speaker 2: having nobody. My mom was still up in Sydney, you know, 356 00:15:02,320 --> 00:15:05,720 Speaker 2: very sick. But I hadn't been alone ever. I'd kind 357 00:15:05,720 --> 00:15:07,680 Speaker 2: of been in relationships since I was sixteen years old. 358 00:15:07,720 --> 00:15:10,520 Speaker 2: I'd never been by myself at the time. I couldn't 359 00:15:10,520 --> 00:15:13,920 Speaker 2: sleep by myself. I found grocery shopping alone, I couldn't 360 00:15:13,920 --> 00:15:16,920 Speaker 2: do it. I'd have an anxiety attack. And suddenly I 361 00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:20,520 Speaker 2: was alone in a new city, no friends, no family, 362 00:15:21,160 --> 00:15:23,360 Speaker 2: And rather than packing it all in and going back 363 00:15:23,400 --> 00:15:26,640 Speaker 2: home with my tail to my legs, I stuck it out. 364 00:15:26,720 --> 00:15:30,600 Speaker 2: I stayed and I made a bunch of new friends. 365 00:15:31,200 --> 00:15:36,240 Speaker 2: I learned to love and appreciate my own company. I 366 00:15:36,280 --> 00:15:39,200 Speaker 2: learned to be my own person on my own. I 367 00:15:39,240 --> 00:15:42,000 Speaker 2: was suddenly taking myself to the movies alone, which is something, 368 00:15:42,680 --> 00:15:44,560 Speaker 2: but it took me so long to get there, it 369 00:15:44,600 --> 00:15:46,280 Speaker 2: really did. And it didn't help that I was suddenly 370 00:15:46,280 --> 00:15:49,160 Speaker 2: a public figure. I'd have these thoughts telling me, oh, no, 371 00:15:49,240 --> 00:15:50,920 Speaker 2: you know, people are going to see you by yourself 372 00:15:50,920 --> 00:15:52,840 Speaker 2: and think you're a loser that has no friends, or 373 00:15:52,880 --> 00:15:55,920 Speaker 2: that someone stood you up for a date. You know, 374 00:15:55,960 --> 00:15:57,840 Speaker 2: I went out there and I started dating for the 375 00:15:57,840 --> 00:16:00,560 Speaker 2: first time in my life. I'd always kind of slipped 376 00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:03,840 Speaker 2: into relationships with high school friends and UNI friends and 377 00:16:03,880 --> 00:16:06,800 Speaker 2: friends of friends, and so for the first time I 378 00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:08,760 Speaker 2: was going on a first date. You know, I'd never 379 00:16:08,760 --> 00:16:10,120 Speaker 2: been on a first date before, and never been on 380 00:16:10,160 --> 00:16:11,640 Speaker 2: a blind date, never been on a dating app. 381 00:16:11,840 --> 00:16:14,080 Speaker 3: You're such a lover too, you like I do. 382 00:16:14,320 --> 00:16:16,920 Speaker 2: I am. I'm a romantic I've got a lot of 383 00:16:16,920 --> 00:16:19,320 Speaker 2: love to give. And but again, for a long time, 384 00:16:19,320 --> 00:16:21,080 Speaker 2: I think a lot of my self worth was wrapped 385 00:16:21,160 --> 00:16:24,240 Speaker 2: up in being in a relationship. And you know, I 386 00:16:24,360 --> 00:16:26,720 Speaker 2: was nothing if I didn't have that romantic love. And 387 00:16:26,760 --> 00:16:28,800 Speaker 2: I guess what I learned over that period was that 388 00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:33,240 Speaker 2: you can get so much fulfillment and enjoyment out of platonic. 389 00:16:32,760 --> 00:16:34,600 Speaker 3: Love, loving yourself self love. 390 00:16:35,720 --> 00:16:37,840 Speaker 2: And I learned all of that in that really really 391 00:16:37,920 --> 00:16:39,000 Speaker 2: dark period of my life. 392 00:16:39,360 --> 00:16:40,920 Speaker 3: So many goods to come out of it. 393 00:16:41,080 --> 00:16:43,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, there really were. That's why I say. 394 00:16:43,640 --> 00:16:46,800 Speaker 2: You know, my boyfriend he really struggles with the fact 395 00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:48,560 Speaker 2: that I say I have no regrets in life. He 396 00:16:48,560 --> 00:16:51,160 Speaker 2: thinks it's bullshit. He's like, no, fuck that everyone has regrets. 397 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:54,120 Speaker 3: I truly don't. I truly have no regrets. 398 00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:56,680 Speaker 2: Yes, there are things I wish i'd done differently, and 399 00:16:57,360 --> 00:17:00,640 Speaker 2: but I've grown and I've learned from that, and I 400 00:17:00,680 --> 00:17:02,480 Speaker 2: wouldn't be the person I am today and I wouldn't 401 00:17:02,480 --> 00:17:06,240 Speaker 2: have had those experiences if I didn't have the fuck ups. 402 00:17:06,240 --> 00:17:07,520 Speaker 2: You need to have the fuck ups to have the 403 00:17:08,119 --> 00:17:11,439 Speaker 2: learnings and the growth totally. So despite all of that, 404 00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:12,800 Speaker 2: I still wouldn't change a thing. 405 00:17:13,080 --> 00:17:16,000 Speaker 3: No, And I love that. I think that that's what 406 00:17:16,160 --> 00:17:19,480 Speaker 3: makes you so lovable as well, because you're just like, 407 00:17:19,520 --> 00:17:25,320 Speaker 3: well here I am. Yeah. What I find really admirable 408 00:17:25,359 --> 00:17:29,920 Speaker 3: about you is you share it all obviously on your pod, 409 00:17:30,080 --> 00:17:34,280 Speaker 3: but in life on insta everything, Like you share love, 410 00:17:34,440 --> 00:17:39,840 Speaker 3: you share mental health, anxiety, you share grief, loss, pain, 411 00:17:40,080 --> 00:17:44,280 Speaker 3: like you are like pol you know, like and I 412 00:17:44,359 --> 00:17:46,640 Speaker 3: know from a little bit of working in influencer space, 413 00:17:46,680 --> 00:17:48,479 Speaker 3: well some days I'm like, yo, I can't pick up 414 00:17:49,040 --> 00:17:51,520 Speaker 3: instead to day, like I don't want to go there. 415 00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:54,800 Speaker 3: I don't want to put myself on I don't want 416 00:17:54,800 --> 00:17:56,760 Speaker 3: to talk about that. But you seem to have this 417 00:17:56,920 --> 00:17:59,560 Speaker 3: like unwavering I don't know if it's a value where 418 00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:01,520 Speaker 3: you're like I'm just going to share who I am 419 00:18:01,720 --> 00:18:03,320 Speaker 3: and people can take or leave that. 420 00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:05,960 Speaker 1: But how like what. 421 00:18:06,080 --> 00:18:08,400 Speaker 3: Is I think it's your superpower, but like, how do 422 00:18:08,440 --> 00:18:10,399 Speaker 3: you do that? How do you have that kind of 423 00:18:10,480 --> 00:18:12,840 Speaker 3: like it's almost like an anti filter. 424 00:18:14,040 --> 00:18:18,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I think Big Brother definitely started that off. 425 00:18:18,520 --> 00:18:21,960 Speaker 2: I mean once you've been on national television waking up, Yeah, 426 00:18:22,080 --> 00:18:25,560 Speaker 2: brushing your teeth. I felt like I had hit complete 427 00:18:25,640 --> 00:18:29,360 Speaker 2: rock bottom and it had been for everyone to see. 428 00:18:29,640 --> 00:18:32,879 Speaker 2: There's something really liberating about that. Yeah, everyone had seen 429 00:18:33,960 --> 00:18:36,200 Speaker 2: all my you know, walts and all. Everyone has seen 430 00:18:36,240 --> 00:18:38,320 Speaker 2: it all. They seen me at my worst, and I 431 00:18:38,359 --> 00:18:40,959 Speaker 2: was like, well, nothing to hide now, I may as 432 00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:44,360 Speaker 2: well keep sharing. And what I've found was the hardest 433 00:18:44,440 --> 00:18:48,119 Speaker 2: post to make are the ones that the feedback and 434 00:18:48,160 --> 00:18:51,320 Speaker 2: the comments and the dms I get make it all worthwhile. 435 00:18:51,760 --> 00:18:56,240 Speaker 2: There the more vulnerable and raw I am. I helped 436 00:18:56,280 --> 00:18:59,240 Speaker 2: so many people, and I've always said that, yeah, it's tough, 437 00:18:59,240 --> 00:19:01,240 Speaker 2: and some days it's tougher, and some days it really 438 00:19:01,280 --> 00:19:02,840 Speaker 2: hecks it out of me. Like some days I am 439 00:19:02,840 --> 00:19:08,760 Speaker 2: feeling so depleted emotionally, mentally, physically, drained from social media 440 00:19:08,840 --> 00:19:11,600 Speaker 2: and from Instagram. But if I can help just one 441 00:19:11,640 --> 00:19:15,000 Speaker 2: person by sharing my grief, my trauma, my anxiety, then 442 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:18,320 Speaker 2: I'm going to keep doing it. And in those darkest days, 443 00:19:18,359 --> 00:19:21,960 Speaker 2: you know, after losing my mum, going through another breakup 444 00:19:22,200 --> 00:19:23,840 Speaker 2: at thirty something and feeling like I'm going to be 445 00:19:23,840 --> 00:19:27,080 Speaker 2: alone forever, if I share a little bit of that 446 00:19:27,119 --> 00:19:29,880 Speaker 2: and bear my soul a bit. I'm helping so many 447 00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:31,960 Speaker 2: people fee less alone in their own grief and trauma. 448 00:19:32,520 --> 00:19:35,480 Speaker 2: I think that's a thirties thing too, that, Yeah, I 449 00:19:35,560 --> 00:19:37,959 Speaker 2: know that when I I think I was thirty one 450 00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:40,560 Speaker 2: and single and I was like, am I going to dig? 451 00:19:41,400 --> 00:19:44,720 Speaker 2: And it's like a real feure that can really especially 452 00:19:44,720 --> 00:19:46,399 Speaker 2: like I'm a lover as well, and so you're like, 453 00:19:46,400 --> 00:19:48,160 Speaker 2: I've got this love I just want to share out, 454 00:19:48,359 --> 00:19:50,040 Speaker 2: you know, And you try so hard and you put 455 00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:51,879 Speaker 2: yourself out there and you get on the dating apps, 456 00:19:51,920 --> 00:19:53,120 Speaker 2: and yeah, it can be. 457 00:19:53,080 --> 00:19:58,160 Speaker 3: Really grind, isn't it. Ground Do you ever skip fearful 458 00:19:58,320 --> 00:19:59,840 Speaker 3: now of being lonely or alon? 459 00:20:00,040 --> 00:20:01,000 Speaker 1: Yeah? I do, I still do. 460 00:20:01,160 --> 00:20:03,240 Speaker 2: I mean, I thank my lucky stars that I met Daniel, 461 00:20:03,240 --> 00:20:04,840 Speaker 2: but it took me eight years to meet him, you know. 462 00:20:04,920 --> 00:20:06,639 Speaker 2: It loves him by the way, he's like, oh my 463 00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:08,080 Speaker 2: god Italian. 464 00:20:08,160 --> 00:20:10,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, both Italian. 465 00:20:11,600 --> 00:20:14,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, no, well because they're both sweet guys, right, you've 466 00:20:14,400 --> 00:20:18,119 Speaker 2: actually tribe and so they're both good guys. But I 467 00:20:18,160 --> 00:20:20,359 Speaker 2: think that it took me so long to meet Daniel, 468 00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:22,040 Speaker 2: and I think for a second there I thought, oh 469 00:20:22,080 --> 00:20:22,600 Speaker 2: I've met the guy. 470 00:20:22,600 --> 00:20:25,119 Speaker 1: Now even's going to fall into place, but it's not 471 00:20:25,200 --> 00:20:25,560 Speaker 1: like that. 472 00:20:25,720 --> 00:20:30,399 Speaker 2: There's still life and big decisions and scary big chats 473 00:20:30,440 --> 00:20:32,080 Speaker 2: you have to have at our age. You know, we 474 00:20:32,119 --> 00:20:35,280 Speaker 2: speaking about this before off air. Our eggs are not 475 00:20:35,280 --> 00:20:38,639 Speaker 2: getting any healthier or fresher. Yeah, and so there are 476 00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:42,120 Speaker 2: those big chats you have to have, and probably ones 477 00:20:42,119 --> 00:20:44,439 Speaker 2: you have to have earlier than I would like. You know, 478 00:20:44,520 --> 00:20:46,280 Speaker 2: it feels like a long time. We've only been together 479 00:20:46,320 --> 00:20:49,119 Speaker 2: for like fifteen months. Yeah, and so having to sit 480 00:20:49,200 --> 00:20:51,399 Speaker 2: him down and say so we're doing this thing or not, 481 00:20:51,680 --> 00:20:53,480 Speaker 2: like you're gonna put a baby in me sometime soon. 482 00:20:53,640 --> 00:20:56,159 Speaker 3: It's just I feel like ever since I've known you, 483 00:20:56,160 --> 00:20:56,959 Speaker 3: you've been lucky. 484 00:20:57,160 --> 00:20:59,760 Speaker 2: I've been clucking since I was five. Yeah, five years old. 485 00:21:00,119 --> 00:21:01,000 Speaker 3: I'm not, I'm not. 486 00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:01,840 Speaker 1: I wanted a kid. 487 00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:04,080 Speaker 2: I wanted to Okay, my five year plan, which is 488 00:21:04,119 --> 00:21:07,199 Speaker 2: just such a lull now, like even me saying like 489 00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:10,320 Speaker 2: I'm embarrassing myself. I wanted to be engaged at twenty five. 490 00:21:10,600 --> 00:21:13,400 Speaker 3: Yeah, we've all been here. Yeah. Yeah. Meanwhile at twenty 491 00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:15,679 Speaker 3: five was on Big Brother literally blowing my life up. 492 00:21:16,480 --> 00:21:19,680 Speaker 2: Engaged twenty five, married at thirty, first kid by thirty one. 493 00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:22,679 Speaker 3: Yeah, but that's also because of our parents' generation and 494 00:21:22,680 --> 00:21:24,600 Speaker 3: the ages they would have been when they had us. 495 00:21:24,680 --> 00:21:28,760 Speaker 3: So it's and I've noticed since deciding to freeze embryos 496 00:21:28,800 --> 00:21:33,480 Speaker 3: and eggs, really having very open conversations with my parents, 497 00:21:33,520 --> 00:21:36,160 Speaker 3: but also educating them because it's not something their generation 498 00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:38,800 Speaker 3: was privileged enough to do, yeah, or have access to. 499 00:21:38,920 --> 00:21:41,679 Speaker 3: So they're like, but what, yeah, what, You'll be fine, 500 00:21:42,119 --> 00:21:44,320 Speaker 3: You'll be fine, You've got another But it's like, well, 501 00:21:44,359 --> 00:21:46,280 Speaker 3: but what about my mental health between now and then? 502 00:21:46,320 --> 00:21:48,119 Speaker 3: You know? And there are all these other things that 503 00:21:48,160 --> 00:21:52,639 Speaker 3: we're lucky enough that we actually get to take into consideration. 504 00:21:52,760 --> 00:21:55,560 Speaker 2: Oh, we're so privileged, especially in this country and without 505 00:21:55,600 --> 00:21:58,040 Speaker 2: healthcare system. But also to me, I feel like I 506 00:21:58,080 --> 00:22:00,000 Speaker 2: thought when I first had my appointment about my eggs, 507 00:22:00,040 --> 00:22:02,760 Speaker 2: I felt really powerful, like I was taking the control back. 508 00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:05,960 Speaker 3: It's empowering. It's very like, oh, great, I actually know 509 00:22:06,680 --> 00:22:07,439 Speaker 3: where I stand. 510 00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:10,320 Speaker 2: I'm not worrying. I'm I mean, I'm not expecting the worst. 511 00:22:10,359 --> 00:22:12,600 Speaker 2: You know, for years, I just was convinced I was barren. 512 00:22:12,640 --> 00:22:14,040 Speaker 1: I don't know why. My anxiety just told me that 513 00:22:14,160 --> 00:22:14,879 Speaker 1: it must be barren. 514 00:22:15,040 --> 00:22:17,480 Speaker 2: Yeah, not that I've been trying, but I just thought, 515 00:22:18,000 --> 00:22:19,600 Speaker 2: I don't know you just expect the worst, right. 516 00:22:19,760 --> 00:22:21,960 Speaker 3: I think it's like a fear thing too, and like 517 00:22:22,040 --> 00:22:23,760 Speaker 3: the fear of the anxiety of all. But then when 518 00:22:23,760 --> 00:22:26,280 Speaker 3: you take, when you face that fear by having a 519 00:22:26,320 --> 00:22:28,640 Speaker 3: console or like getting a couple of bud tests done, 520 00:22:29,800 --> 00:22:34,680 Speaker 3: that's when it flips and becomes totally empowering. 521 00:22:33,359 --> 00:22:35,640 Speaker 1: Which is why I love power totally. 522 00:22:35,640 --> 00:22:37,440 Speaker 3: But that's why I love your pod and I love 523 00:22:37,480 --> 00:22:40,640 Speaker 3: what you share because you are so just open being 524 00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:42,399 Speaker 3: this is what I'm doing this week, and it's I 525 00:22:42,440 --> 00:22:45,080 Speaker 3: think it is and that is where it comes back to. 526 00:22:45,160 --> 00:22:47,520 Speaker 3: You are a sharer of all and in many ways, 527 00:22:47,520 --> 00:22:51,360 Speaker 3: and I mean it's the best way and overshare absolutely absolutely. 528 00:22:51,440 --> 00:22:55,119 Speaker 2: My boyfriend still like we're out, Oh, I can't probably 529 00:22:55,119 --> 00:22:56,840 Speaker 2: retell the story I got in trouble for telling on 530 00:22:56,880 --> 00:22:59,040 Speaker 2: the weekend. But we were out in the weekend at 531 00:22:59,080 --> 00:23:02,119 Speaker 2: friends every wedding recovery and I was telling a story 532 00:23:02,160 --> 00:23:02,680 Speaker 2: about him. 533 00:23:02,560 --> 00:23:03,320 Speaker 1: The night before. 534 00:23:05,880 --> 00:23:07,760 Speaker 2: I won't tell that story for you, Daniel, But basically 535 00:23:07,880 --> 00:23:09,680 Speaker 2: he was like, I can't believe you just told him 536 00:23:09,720 --> 00:23:10,480 Speaker 2: that story. 537 00:23:10,600 --> 00:23:13,040 Speaker 3: I'm like, well, our friends here, it's okay. You know 538 00:23:13,119 --> 00:23:16,160 Speaker 3: you have zero filter, Like, don't worry. 539 00:23:15,960 --> 00:23:18,359 Speaker 2: About it, Like why is it a big deal? What 540 00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:20,479 Speaker 2: are you embarrassed about? It's a beautiful dick, Daniel. 541 00:23:21,720 --> 00:23:24,040 Speaker 3: Well, I'm sorry, We've got that on recording as well. 542 00:23:24,160 --> 00:23:28,879 Speaker 3: Beautiful dick. But it is. It is really empowering when 543 00:23:29,240 --> 00:23:32,640 Speaker 3: you don't have that filter because you're just like, well, fuck, 544 00:23:32,720 --> 00:23:35,360 Speaker 3: I've got nothing to hide. And it takes the stress 545 00:23:35,400 --> 00:23:36,960 Speaker 3: off a lot too, when you know that you're just 546 00:23:36,960 --> 00:23:39,239 Speaker 3: a person that speaks very freely. So I think it 547 00:23:39,320 --> 00:23:40,920 Speaker 3: is you're super bower because a lot of people don't 548 00:23:40,960 --> 00:23:41,480 Speaker 3: live that way. 549 00:23:41,560 --> 00:23:41,879 Speaker 1: Thank you. 550 00:23:41,960 --> 00:23:43,960 Speaker 2: It's got im in trouble as well, like many times 551 00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:47,439 Speaker 2: double edged sword. Yeah, absolutely sometimes I and it's not. 552 00:23:47,680 --> 00:23:49,560 Speaker 2: Daniel is so much better at seeing it. He can 553 00:23:49,600 --> 00:23:51,520 Speaker 2: see it as it's happening. Like I'll be sitting there 554 00:23:51,560 --> 00:23:53,560 Speaker 2: typing up a caption like, yes, this is great, this 555 00:23:53,600 --> 00:23:57,479 Speaker 2: is life changing, this is brilliant. I'd be like, oh, honey, 556 00:23:57,520 --> 00:24:00,560 Speaker 2: do you I mean, are you sure you want to 557 00:24:00,600 --> 00:24:02,600 Speaker 2: share that? And then I share it and then it 558 00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:06,040 Speaker 2: lands poorly and I'm like, okay, so that was that 559 00:24:06,119 --> 00:24:06,680 Speaker 2: was too much? 560 00:24:06,840 --> 00:24:08,480 Speaker 1: Yeah, I understand. 561 00:24:08,520 --> 00:24:10,320 Speaker 3: We have a rule wherehere you have to read everything 562 00:24:10,359 --> 00:24:13,480 Speaker 3: out loud before you hit post, so you type it 563 00:24:13,600 --> 00:24:15,680 Speaker 3: no matter what is like, get it out there. And then, 564 00:24:15,880 --> 00:24:19,720 Speaker 3: especially for me, I do the emotional email and I'm like, no, no, 565 00:24:19,720 --> 00:24:21,320 Speaker 3: we're going to read this out loud, blah blah, We're 566 00:24:21,359 --> 00:24:24,160 Speaker 3: gonna have a twenty minute sit down and then I'll 567 00:24:24,200 --> 00:24:24,520 Speaker 3: be like. 568 00:24:24,520 --> 00:24:26,240 Speaker 1: Oh, that needs a little leather it. Yeah. 569 00:24:26,280 --> 00:24:28,520 Speaker 2: My tone's so off in emails, Like when I spoke 570 00:24:28,560 --> 00:24:30,920 Speaker 2: in advertising, I was always getting in trouble for my tone. 571 00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:34,280 Speaker 3: They're like, Tully, we know you're not, but you sound 572 00:24:34,280 --> 00:24:35,119 Speaker 3: like a bit of a bitch. 573 00:24:35,200 --> 00:24:37,200 Speaker 2: Yeah, And I'm like, oh, I'm just just synct and 574 00:24:37,280 --> 00:24:40,120 Speaker 2: like efficient, yeah, yeah, just typing them out quickly quick. 575 00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:43,159 Speaker 3: Yeah. Okay, there's something I'm really excited to talk to 576 00:24:43,200 --> 00:24:45,400 Speaker 3: you about because I, as you know, I live half 577 00:24:45,400 --> 00:24:47,720 Speaker 3: in LA and I've just got back and I joined 578 00:24:47,760 --> 00:24:50,120 Speaker 3: a book club when I was in LA. So I've 579 00:24:50,119 --> 00:24:53,560 Speaker 3: always read nonfiction because I write health and nutrition books 580 00:24:53,680 --> 00:24:55,800 Speaker 3: or self help kind of books. So that's kind of 581 00:24:55,800 --> 00:24:58,159 Speaker 3: what I've I had quite a few of my my 582 00:24:59,080 --> 00:25:00,600 Speaker 3: But you know how you kind of reading what you 583 00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:02,760 Speaker 3: end up writing, and you know the world you're in, 584 00:25:02,840 --> 00:25:04,320 Speaker 3: you want to know kind of like where you're sitting 585 00:25:04,359 --> 00:25:07,640 Speaker 3: and whatnot. Anyway, and a friend of mine said, she said, look, 586 00:25:07,680 --> 00:25:09,919 Speaker 3: I've just read this book with my book club. I 587 00:25:09,960 --> 00:25:11,679 Speaker 3: think you're gonna love it. Just give it a go. 588 00:25:11,800 --> 00:25:12,320 Speaker 3: Set in LA. 589 00:25:12,359 --> 00:25:14,959 Speaker 2: It'll be fun to read. Like I inhaled it in 590 00:25:15,119 --> 00:25:15,959 Speaker 2: forty eight hours. 591 00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:16,800 Speaker 3: Is it the best? 592 00:25:16,880 --> 00:25:17,840 Speaker 1: Can you find a book like that? 593 00:25:18,119 --> 00:25:18,320 Speaker 2: Oh? 594 00:25:18,520 --> 00:25:21,280 Speaker 3: And then I was like, maybe this is my genre. 595 00:25:21,280 --> 00:25:22,840 Speaker 3: And then but then also like, I've had a few 596 00:25:22,840 --> 00:25:24,480 Speaker 3: authors on the pod and one of them is an 597 00:25:24,480 --> 00:25:29,120 Speaker 3: amazing crime fiction author, my favorite. Oh, her name's Candace Fox. 598 00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:33,960 Speaker 3: She's incredible. The name rings a Bell Crimson Lake, Oh 599 00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:37,600 Speaker 3: the chase. I'll send you some Wreki's. And I had 600 00:25:37,640 --> 00:25:39,760 Speaker 3: never read I'd never read fiction before in my life. 601 00:25:39,800 --> 00:25:42,560 Speaker 3: I'd only ever read nonfiction. And again I was like, 602 00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:44,440 Speaker 3: oh my god, I said to her, this is book 603 00:25:44,560 --> 00:25:46,639 Speaker 3: was really think, I said, I've read in three days. 604 00:25:46,760 --> 00:25:48,560 Speaker 3: And I was like, I've never read fiction before in 605 00:25:48,600 --> 00:25:51,199 Speaker 3: my life. And it was like discovering this love that 606 00:25:51,280 --> 00:25:54,160 Speaker 3: I didn't realize I even had. I love that And 607 00:25:54,240 --> 00:25:57,840 Speaker 3: so you, through researching you, I've discovered something that I 608 00:25:57,880 --> 00:26:00,879 Speaker 3: didn't even know existed. So thank you for good Reads 609 00:26:01,119 --> 00:26:02,959 Speaker 3: because I didn't know that it is existing. 610 00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:05,840 Speaker 2: How great is good Reads? So can you explain why 611 00:26:06,359 --> 00:26:08,240 Speaker 2: So I'm really bad at keeping it up today. I 612 00:26:08,240 --> 00:26:10,720 Speaker 2: think because I read so much and I have so 613 00:26:10,760 --> 00:26:13,439 Speaker 2: many other apps. So basically it's like, oh my god, 614 00:26:13,440 --> 00:26:15,000 Speaker 2: it's the best in the world. It's like a book 615 00:26:15,040 --> 00:26:18,479 Speaker 2: recommendation app. So you create a profile, you put in 616 00:26:18,640 --> 00:26:21,800 Speaker 2: books you're reading, books you want to read, and then 617 00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:24,800 Speaker 2: you can add your friends or you know, Instagram followers, 618 00:26:24,880 --> 00:26:27,000 Speaker 2: and then based off the books you're reading and loving, 619 00:26:27,040 --> 00:26:29,120 Speaker 2: they recommend you other books you'd read a mood. 620 00:26:29,600 --> 00:26:30,960 Speaker 1: It's a really a way. I was using it. 621 00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:33,720 Speaker 2: Originally because I was always seeing books that I wanted 622 00:26:33,720 --> 00:26:36,120 Speaker 2: to buy later day and then forgetting them. 623 00:26:36,359 --> 00:26:38,119 Speaker 1: Yeah, so I'd add them to my app. Because then 624 00:26:38,119 --> 00:26:38,439 Speaker 1: when you're in. 625 00:26:38,440 --> 00:26:40,840 Speaker 3: A bookstore at the airport, opening app and it's like 626 00:26:40,880 --> 00:26:41,240 Speaker 3: this what you. 627 00:26:41,240 --> 00:26:41,840 Speaker 1: Want to be reading. 628 00:26:42,840 --> 00:26:44,800 Speaker 2: You can upload your own reviews of it, you can 629 00:26:44,840 --> 00:26:48,159 Speaker 2: share books with you know, other good reads friends. It's 630 00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:50,840 Speaker 2: the best because if you go to my phone and 631 00:26:50,840 --> 00:26:53,840 Speaker 2: go to screenshots, I reckon eighty percent of them. 632 00:26:53,800 --> 00:26:56,080 Speaker 3: Are screenshots of other people's stories. 633 00:26:55,760 --> 00:26:57,960 Speaker 2: Where they're recommending a book. Totally, like, I have so 634 00:26:58,000 --> 00:27:00,720 Speaker 2: many books screen grabs. Georgia Love is great as well, 635 00:27:00,720 --> 00:27:03,680 Speaker 2: her and I like some kind of books. But rather 636 00:27:03,720 --> 00:27:05,840 Speaker 2: than doing that, you just keep in this little Appeah. 637 00:27:05,920 --> 00:27:08,640 Speaker 2: It's like, oh, you loved you know whatever. He's four 638 00:27:08,640 --> 00:27:11,479 Speaker 2: other books that other people loved as well, and it 639 00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:13,480 Speaker 2: just kind of connects you to these books that you 640 00:27:13,560 --> 00:27:15,800 Speaker 2: know you're going to enjoy and it really lets you down. 641 00:27:15,840 --> 00:27:18,040 Speaker 3: But good Reieson is such a great app Well, this 642 00:27:18,080 --> 00:27:22,280 Speaker 3: is what I love learning about you. So you've studied journalism, 643 00:27:22,560 --> 00:27:26,640 Speaker 3: you're a writer, you love to read. I know you've 644 00:27:26,640 --> 00:27:31,920 Speaker 3: been offered a book deal, but that's more autobiography, right, yeah, 645 00:27:32,240 --> 00:27:34,879 Speaker 3: where are you with that? So? 646 00:27:35,359 --> 00:27:39,200 Speaker 2: I was offered that deal the week my mom passed away, 647 00:27:40,480 --> 00:27:42,800 Speaker 2: So there was a lot happening. 648 00:27:43,800 --> 00:27:45,280 Speaker 1: It's funny, you know when it rains at pause. 649 00:27:45,400 --> 00:27:48,040 Speaker 2: So that same week my mom died, Mum and me 650 00:27:48,160 --> 00:27:51,080 Speaker 2: approached me to host my first podcast with them, and 651 00:27:51,119 --> 00:27:53,199 Speaker 2: I was asked to write a book. And I was like, 652 00:27:53,359 --> 00:27:55,280 Speaker 2: these are both things I really want to do, but 653 00:27:55,520 --> 00:27:57,240 Speaker 2: I don't know if I have it in me right now. 654 00:27:58,000 --> 00:28:00,439 Speaker 2: And then she said, you know, we get you a 655 00:28:00,440 --> 00:28:01,760 Speaker 2: ghost write and I was like, no, no, no no. If 656 00:28:01,760 --> 00:28:03,520 Speaker 2: I'm running a book, I'm running my own book. Like 657 00:28:03,880 --> 00:28:05,879 Speaker 2: I can't handle someone running my bio for me, I 658 00:28:05,880 --> 00:28:08,760 Speaker 2: have to write my own bios. But it's really it's 659 00:28:08,760 --> 00:28:11,399 Speaker 2: a really uncomfy spot, Like Kurdos to you at all 660 00:28:11,440 --> 00:28:13,359 Speaker 2: that you do with your with your writing. I know 661 00:28:13,400 --> 00:28:15,880 Speaker 2: it's not so autobiography, but there is bits and pieces. 662 00:28:16,400 --> 00:28:19,680 Speaker 2: But running like yourself is really uncomfy. It's really sort 663 00:28:19,720 --> 00:28:23,760 Speaker 2: of confronting. It's traumatic having to relive through all these 664 00:28:23,760 --> 00:28:25,720 Speaker 2: bits of trauma, you know, the you've dealt with over 665 00:28:25,720 --> 00:28:28,960 Speaker 2: your life, and it just I've tried to start so 666 00:28:29,040 --> 00:28:32,640 Speaker 2: many times and I never get anywhere. And I've thought 667 00:28:32,640 --> 00:28:34,800 Speaker 2: about taking myself away to a cabin in the woods. 668 00:28:35,000 --> 00:28:37,960 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, helps having a little writers you know, retreat 669 00:28:37,960 --> 00:28:42,400 Speaker 2: for myself, but it's hard. It's scary opening those old runs. 670 00:28:42,440 --> 00:28:45,360 Speaker 2: And then I have these you know bouts of you know, 671 00:28:46,160 --> 00:28:48,080 Speaker 2: imposter syndrome where I'm like, no one's going to read 672 00:28:48,120 --> 00:28:49,480 Speaker 2: a book about me, Like what do I have to 673 00:28:49,480 --> 00:28:51,560 Speaker 2: say anyway? Like I don't have anything interesting to say, 674 00:28:52,160 --> 00:28:54,040 Speaker 2: And then that kind of throws me off it as well. 675 00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:58,720 Speaker 2: But yeah, it's one thing that I have so much, 676 00:28:59,120 --> 00:29:01,200 Speaker 2: so many decisions in my life, I question would my 677 00:29:01,240 --> 00:29:02,040 Speaker 2: mom be proud of me? 678 00:29:02,560 --> 00:29:03,280 Speaker 1: You know? The big brother. 679 00:29:03,320 --> 00:29:05,200 Speaker 2: Stuff is an obvious one, like you know, the first 680 00:29:05,240 --> 00:29:07,480 Speaker 2: time round, probably not second time round. 681 00:29:07,600 --> 00:29:08,200 Speaker 1: I did good. 682 00:29:08,480 --> 00:29:11,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, but she was such a huge book work, you know, 683 00:29:11,560 --> 00:29:13,440 Speaker 2: like we knew going with her to the shops. If 684 00:29:13,480 --> 00:29:15,760 Speaker 2: we asked for a toy, we'd never get one. If 685 00:29:15,760 --> 00:29:17,520 Speaker 2: you ask for a book, would always get one. I 686 00:29:17,520 --> 00:29:19,520 Speaker 2: think that's why, Well, I'm such a big reader, and 687 00:29:19,520 --> 00:29:21,600 Speaker 2: that's probably why I end up going into journalism and 688 00:29:21,640 --> 00:29:24,960 Speaker 2: why my vocabulary is so extensive, and it's great for 689 00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:26,280 Speaker 2: your brain, reading. 690 00:29:26,200 --> 00:29:30,400 Speaker 3: Your lexicon, your lexicon totally and train. I train in acting, 691 00:29:30,680 --> 00:29:33,440 Speaker 3: and the first thing any teacher will say is just 692 00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:36,640 Speaker 3: go read yeah anything, Yeah, and out loud is the 693 00:29:36,640 --> 00:29:37,840 Speaker 3: other trick for vocal work. 694 00:29:37,920 --> 00:29:38,440 Speaker 1: Yeah. 695 00:29:38,480 --> 00:29:40,120 Speaker 2: But I just know, like when I was asked to 696 00:29:40,120 --> 00:29:41,720 Speaker 2: do that, I thought, oh my god, if I could 697 00:29:41,720 --> 00:29:44,200 Speaker 2: tell my mom, yeah, I'm going to write a book like, 698 00:29:44,240 --> 00:29:46,840 Speaker 2: she would just be so proud. So it's for something 699 00:29:46,880 --> 00:29:49,080 Speaker 2: I really want to try and do. Yeah, it's just 700 00:29:49,360 --> 00:29:50,200 Speaker 2: really scary. 701 00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:53,960 Speaker 3: Scary is good and one hundred percent your mum will 702 00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:56,160 Speaker 3: be with you as you write, I believe. I mean 703 00:29:56,200 --> 00:29:58,960 Speaker 3: I'm a bit hippie dippy like that, and I think 704 00:29:59,000 --> 00:30:01,200 Speaker 3: you'd have a great book in you. I think that 705 00:30:01,320 --> 00:30:04,800 Speaker 3: the more that I researched you and research what you like, 706 00:30:05,320 --> 00:30:08,120 Speaker 3: you read fiction, Like, would you ever consider writing fiction? 707 00:30:08,360 --> 00:30:11,440 Speaker 1: Well? I did that for fun, like as a teenager. 708 00:30:11,520 --> 00:30:14,600 Speaker 2: I would write short stories like for fun, like on 709 00:30:14,640 --> 00:30:17,760 Speaker 2: the weekends. So I would love to something like that. 710 00:30:17,800 --> 00:30:21,080 Speaker 2: I actually also, I mean I probably no, you guys 711 00:30:21,120 --> 00:30:24,680 Speaker 2: can know. I want to write a book about explaining 712 00:30:24,720 --> 00:30:28,520 Speaker 2: anxiety to young girls because I had anxiety in my 713 00:30:28,560 --> 00:30:30,640 Speaker 2: whole life when I was five years old, and I 714 00:30:30,680 --> 00:30:34,640 Speaker 2: didn't know what it was, and it was confusing and scary, 715 00:30:34,720 --> 00:30:36,520 Speaker 2: and had I been able to sort of give it 716 00:30:36,560 --> 00:30:38,560 Speaker 2: a name or a feeling, it would have helped me 717 00:30:38,600 --> 00:30:40,800 Speaker 2: a lot. You know. They've called me a worry wart 718 00:30:40,880 --> 00:30:43,560 Speaker 2: and said that I had bad dreams and bad butterflies 719 00:30:43,600 --> 00:30:46,360 Speaker 2: and the woozies and all these words that my parents 720 00:30:46,360 --> 00:30:48,200 Speaker 2: gave it. But we didn't know it was, you know, 721 00:30:49,240 --> 00:30:52,680 Speaker 2: life's anxiety euphoria. Yes, I had a character. 722 00:30:52,760 --> 00:30:56,920 Speaker 3: I was a kid with severe panic backs and a 723 00:30:56,920 --> 00:30:59,840 Speaker 3: lot of undiagnosed stuff, And it's like far out imagine 724 00:30:59,840 --> 00:31:01,560 Speaker 3: if like there was something like that. 725 00:31:01,720 --> 00:31:02,200 Speaker 1: Yeah, I just. 726 00:31:02,160 --> 00:31:04,640 Speaker 2: Feel like just a book for you know, little anxious 727 00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:07,440 Speaker 2: babies who can kind of try and understand what they're 728 00:31:07,480 --> 00:31:08,240 Speaker 2: going through a bit more. 729 00:31:08,400 --> 00:31:10,720 Speaker 3: You could also work that into an autobiography that could 730 00:31:10,720 --> 00:31:11,720 Speaker 3: be a whole section. 731 00:31:11,760 --> 00:31:14,480 Speaker 1: Just saying I need to do it. I need to 732 00:31:14,480 --> 00:31:16,040 Speaker 1: just get off my ass and do it. 733 00:31:16,280 --> 00:31:17,240 Speaker 3: Definitely do it. 734 00:31:17,280 --> 00:31:19,120 Speaker 2: Definitely do But then I keep adding chapters to it, 735 00:31:19,160 --> 00:31:21,520 Speaker 2: like I've just gone back to Big Brother again. It's like, oh, 736 00:31:21,520 --> 00:31:23,080 Speaker 2: and I have to add a whole new chapter. 737 00:31:23,440 --> 00:31:26,120 Speaker 3: They'll bring it when you write. They'll give you parameters 738 00:31:26,120 --> 00:31:27,800 Speaker 3: that you have to write to so they'll be like 739 00:31:27,840 --> 00:31:30,760 Speaker 3: you cannot go over sixty thousand words or eighty thousand words, 740 00:31:30,960 --> 00:31:33,120 Speaker 3: which is scary. I know, I can see Tully's eyes 741 00:31:33,240 --> 00:31:37,040 Speaker 3: or like big I think that. Like, if you've got 742 00:31:37,080 --> 00:31:39,400 Speaker 3: those parameters, though, it gets really easy to kind of 743 00:31:39,440 --> 00:31:41,280 Speaker 3: like in case says the author of like what like 744 00:31:41,320 --> 00:31:42,720 Speaker 3: six books at this point, Like how. 745 00:31:42,640 --> 00:31:45,800 Speaker 1: Many books have you written? Eleven? 746 00:31:45,240 --> 00:31:48,080 Speaker 3: But a lot of them were health and nutrition with 747 00:31:48,120 --> 00:31:51,520 Speaker 3: the pretty pictures, a little bit different to writing, like no, 748 00:31:51,560 --> 00:31:52,640 Speaker 3: it's good, but you know what else? 749 00:31:52,840 --> 00:31:55,760 Speaker 1: Hoy rain White. Rain White is her name. 750 00:31:55,880 --> 00:32:00,240 Speaker 2: Yes, she's part of m Murma out Loud. Yeah, she's 751 00:32:00,240 --> 00:32:03,560 Speaker 2: also an author. I came to her and I said, look, 752 00:32:03,600 --> 00:32:05,240 Speaker 2: you know, I don't know where to start. They wanted 753 00:32:05,280 --> 00:32:06,800 Speaker 2: first chapter. I don't know how to give them a 754 00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:08,000 Speaker 2: first chapter. Where do you begin? 755 00:32:08,200 --> 00:32:08,320 Speaker 3: Like? 756 00:32:08,680 --> 00:32:11,160 Speaker 2: Yeah, when I was two, I like, where do you start? 757 00:32:11,160 --> 00:32:13,200 Speaker 2: And she said, don't start at the beginning. No, they 758 00:32:13,240 --> 00:32:15,840 Speaker 2: want a chapter, not a first chapter. She's like, start wherever. 759 00:32:16,040 --> 00:32:17,840 Speaker 2: And you saw it in later and that took so 760 00:32:17,920 --> 00:32:18,720 Speaker 2: much pressure off me. 761 00:32:18,960 --> 00:32:20,640 Speaker 1: Yeah, I was like, I should just start? 762 00:32:21,280 --> 00:32:23,480 Speaker 2: Can I ask? Can I ask this a w rekie 763 00:32:23,480 --> 00:32:24,560 Speaker 2: of a book you've read recently? 764 00:32:24,600 --> 00:32:24,920 Speaker 3: In love? 765 00:32:25,040 --> 00:32:25,920 Speaker 1: Oh? Ah my god? 766 00:32:26,040 --> 00:32:28,000 Speaker 2: So I stupidly have you see this on my Instagram 767 00:32:28,040 --> 00:32:30,520 Speaker 2: stories lately? So I'm a cycle for an airport book 768 00:32:30,560 --> 00:32:33,160 Speaker 2: love book, Yes I have. I can't go to the 769 00:32:33,200 --> 00:32:35,680 Speaker 2: airport and not buy a new book. So I can't. 770 00:32:35,760 --> 00:32:37,240 Speaker 1: It's my favorite party about going to the airport. I 771 00:32:37,240 --> 00:32:37,520 Speaker 1: don't care. 772 00:32:37,560 --> 00:32:39,720 Speaker 2: I've got three in my suitcase. I'm buying another one 773 00:32:40,400 --> 00:32:42,880 Speaker 2: and I like going to the you know, most recommended 774 00:32:42,960 --> 00:32:45,920 Speaker 2: or most read. Saw a true crime looking one. Read 775 00:32:45,920 --> 00:32:47,120 Speaker 2: the blurb at the back. I was like, yeah, it's 776 00:32:47,120 --> 00:32:50,440 Speaker 2: been to me. Annihilated it. Like. I came home at 777 00:32:50,440 --> 00:32:53,760 Speaker 2: about three pm on like a Saturday, and I read 778 00:32:54,400 --> 00:32:56,600 Speaker 2: all night slept work cup read. I finished it in 779 00:32:56,640 --> 00:32:58,600 Speaker 2: like ten hours. Yeah yeah, And I haven't had a 780 00:32:58,600 --> 00:32:59,800 Speaker 2: book like that in the long It's. 781 00:32:59,680 --> 00:33:00,600 Speaker 3: Such a good feeling. 782 00:33:00,840 --> 00:33:03,400 Speaker 2: And then I get to the end and I'm reading 783 00:33:03,440 --> 00:33:06,040 Speaker 2: about the author, and I realized I've read the third 784 00:33:06,080 --> 00:33:06,760 Speaker 2: in a series. 785 00:33:06,880 --> 00:33:09,000 Speaker 3: Oh I did see this on your inside? Yes, you 786 00:33:09,080 --> 00:33:09,920 Speaker 3: read it the wrong way. 787 00:33:10,440 --> 00:33:15,760 Speaker 2: I was fuming, But also I really respected and appreciated 788 00:33:15,880 --> 00:33:17,400 Speaker 2: how great of a standalone book it was. 789 00:33:17,440 --> 00:33:18,480 Speaker 1: I was like, I didn't even know. 790 00:33:19,080 --> 00:33:21,240 Speaker 2: I didn't even feel like to the party. But you 791 00:33:21,280 --> 00:33:23,800 Speaker 2: start Harry Potter on Gobblet of Fire. You've got nobody 792 00:33:23,800 --> 00:33:27,680 Speaker 2: idea what's going on? You've got no idea? People, what's yeah? Yeah, yeah, 793 00:33:27,680 --> 00:33:29,080 Speaker 2: And I didn't feel that way, and I thought there 794 00:33:29,080 --> 00:33:31,160 Speaker 2: was a testament to the author. But then obviously I 795 00:33:31,240 --> 00:33:33,480 Speaker 2: went back and bought the first two. Have you started 796 00:33:33,520 --> 00:33:36,000 Speaker 2: the first? I finished all that amazing? What was your favorite? 797 00:33:36,000 --> 00:33:38,120 Speaker 1: So the last one was really good? 798 00:33:38,120 --> 00:33:38,280 Speaker 2: OK? 799 00:33:39,840 --> 00:33:42,920 Speaker 1: So his name is Robert? Where is it? It's like, I 800 00:33:42,920 --> 00:33:45,320 Speaker 1: remember laughing at it because it sounds like Ham. 801 00:33:46,440 --> 00:33:49,160 Speaker 2: I think it's it's Robotham, but it looks like Robot 802 00:33:49,160 --> 00:33:52,240 Speaker 2: Ham because. 803 00:33:51,960 --> 00:33:55,120 Speaker 1: It's it's Robothem. So it's like Robot Ham. 804 00:33:55,640 --> 00:33:56,800 Speaker 3: That is his first name. 805 00:33:56,880 --> 00:34:00,000 Speaker 2: It's his surname Robot, So his first name is Robert. 806 00:34:00,360 --> 00:34:02,760 Speaker 2: Hang on, do not disturb. I was like, why won't 807 00:34:02,800 --> 00:34:03,160 Speaker 2: you load? 808 00:34:03,640 --> 00:34:05,320 Speaker 3: Oh my goodness, I'm really excited to read this. 809 00:34:05,400 --> 00:34:10,919 Speaker 2: Okay, you've got to Michael Rebotham Okay, and he's got 810 00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:12,600 Speaker 2: We've got a couple of books. But there's this three 811 00:34:12,600 --> 00:34:15,320 Speaker 2: in this series of his two characters, there's a detective 812 00:34:15,400 --> 00:34:18,080 Speaker 2: and this lost little girl. The first one is called 813 00:34:18,160 --> 00:34:21,080 Speaker 2: good Girl, Bad Girl, yeah. The second is when she 814 00:34:21,280 --> 00:34:24,160 Speaker 2: was good yeah, and the third is lying beside you. 815 00:34:24,680 --> 00:34:29,280 Speaker 3: Yeah. So I've seen they are so great true crime 816 00:34:29,440 --> 00:34:30,400 Speaker 3: or crime fiction. 817 00:34:30,440 --> 00:34:30,960 Speaker 1: Crime fiction. 818 00:34:31,120 --> 00:34:33,600 Speaker 2: Yeah, but please read them in order because you're great. 819 00:34:33,760 --> 00:34:36,200 Speaker 2: You know, there are certain characters that, like it seemed 820 00:34:36,200 --> 00:34:36,880 Speaker 2: like they might. 821 00:34:36,719 --> 00:34:38,520 Speaker 1: Die, but I knew that they didn't die because I. 822 00:34:40,080 --> 00:34:42,640 Speaker 2: Still great books alone, but would have been much better 823 00:34:43,200 --> 00:34:45,040 Speaker 2: in order their author. 824 00:34:45,080 --> 00:34:47,719 Speaker 3: I was telling you about Candice Fox when I interviewed her. 825 00:34:47,840 --> 00:34:50,319 Speaker 3: I was like, she writes crime fiction. I'm totally going 826 00:34:50,320 --> 00:34:52,279 Speaker 3: to send you these books. Please do, please do you 827 00:34:52,320 --> 00:34:54,360 Speaker 3: can get into them. But I said, what do you 828 00:34:54,360 --> 00:34:57,560 Speaker 3: do for research? Like Hattie? And she's like, ah, I 829 00:34:57,680 --> 00:34:59,760 Speaker 3: used to be pen pals with one of the toolbox 830 00:34:59,840 --> 00:35:02,440 Speaker 3: kill So you're too young for the toolbox killers, I 831 00:35:02,480 --> 00:35:03,040 Speaker 3: think no. 832 00:35:03,160 --> 00:35:04,560 Speaker 1: I've heard about two box killers. 833 00:35:04,560 --> 00:35:09,080 Speaker 3: Two guys Santa Monica. They had a van I seventies. 834 00:35:09,160 --> 00:35:11,239 Speaker 2: I listened to so many true crime podcasts. I've heard 835 00:35:11,239 --> 00:35:13,000 Speaker 2: about every car. I get ready for this, though. 836 00:35:13,080 --> 00:35:16,319 Speaker 3: You are going to die in a good way, so 837 00:35:17,000 --> 00:35:20,320 Speaker 3: not actually die, she pempaled. So there was two guys. 838 00:35:20,400 --> 00:35:22,560 Speaker 2: They worked together and they used a tool so they'd 839 00:35:22,600 --> 00:35:24,840 Speaker 2: rape girls and then they'd use a toolbox to dismember 840 00:35:24,880 --> 00:35:27,279 Speaker 2: them afterwards and murder them. And one of the guys 841 00:35:27,320 --> 00:35:29,759 Speaker 2: they both obviously got caught eventually, and one guy had 842 00:35:29,760 --> 00:35:31,840 Speaker 2: full remorse, like I'm started da da. 843 00:35:31,680 --> 00:35:34,239 Speaker 3: And the other guy was like, yeah, I wasn't that bad. 844 00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:36,439 Speaker 3: I was only bad for three months of my life. 845 00:35:36,640 --> 00:35:40,080 Speaker 3: Rest of the time, I've been great. Anyway, She pen 846 00:35:40,160 --> 00:35:43,360 Speaker 3: paled him and said, can I come and busy? He 847 00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:45,640 Speaker 3: was at San Quentin, which is the big the big 848 00:35:45,680 --> 00:35:50,160 Speaker 3: one in San Francisco maximum security death row with all 849 00:35:50,200 --> 00:35:52,680 Speaker 3: that jazz, and they're like, yeah, sure, you get a 850 00:35:52,719 --> 00:35:55,080 Speaker 3: full visit. She goes, I had to go through a 851 00:35:55,280 --> 00:35:58,680 Speaker 3: really intense kind of like screening you can't wear denim 852 00:35:58,719 --> 00:36:02,839 Speaker 3: because they're outfitters. Dinner in the jail and she goes, 853 00:36:02,880 --> 00:36:07,799 Speaker 3: I walk so, yeah, very chic. She walks into this 854 00:36:08,600 --> 00:36:11,600 Speaker 3: clear glass cube, so it felt like she was in 855 00:36:11,600 --> 00:36:15,000 Speaker 3: a shark tank, but it had metal grating around the side. 856 00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:16,719 Speaker 2: And she said it was just a table. There was 857 00:36:16,800 --> 00:36:20,759 Speaker 2: nothing separating half of the this is anibal let star. 858 00:36:21,520 --> 00:36:24,839 Speaker 2: He walks in, walks over to the wall. 859 00:36:24,880 --> 00:36:28,200 Speaker 3: And puts his hands through and they undo his cuffs 860 00:36:29,000 --> 00:36:31,239 Speaker 3: and he sits down opposite her at the table. There's 861 00:36:31,280 --> 00:36:33,920 Speaker 3: nothing separating them. They're left alone, and he goes, hey, 862 00:36:33,960 --> 00:36:35,440 Speaker 3: how are you? And she's like, well, I feel like 863 00:36:35,480 --> 00:36:37,480 Speaker 3: I'm in a room with a tiger. Like what happens 864 00:36:37,480 --> 00:36:40,719 Speaker 3: if you go for me right now? And he said, 865 00:36:40,760 --> 00:36:42,719 Speaker 3: can you see that little triangle cut out of the 866 00:36:42,719 --> 00:36:46,319 Speaker 3: ceiling above above yourself there? And she goes yeah. He goes, 867 00:36:46,360 --> 00:36:49,120 Speaker 3: there's a sniper on me. So if I do anything to. 868 00:36:49,160 --> 00:36:59,000 Speaker 1: You, look at And then I said, what did you 869 00:36:59,040 --> 00:36:59,560 Speaker 1: learn from him? 870 00:36:59,560 --> 00:37:03,560 Speaker 3: Because you these amazing crime fiction books, and she said, 871 00:37:04,280 --> 00:37:08,319 Speaker 3: asked him about one of his victims, Andrea. And he goes, oh, 872 00:37:08,680 --> 00:37:11,360 Speaker 3: V six, so we couldn't name her. And he said 873 00:37:11,800 --> 00:37:13,799 Speaker 3: she goes he just flicked his hand like it was 874 00:37:13,840 --> 00:37:16,719 Speaker 3: flicking a piece of grass, and he's like, oh yeah, 875 00:37:16,840 --> 00:37:19,319 Speaker 3: V six And she said the way that it was 876 00:37:19,360 --> 00:37:21,919 Speaker 3: so like the human life was so disposable to him, 877 00:37:22,680 --> 00:37:26,120 Speaker 3: so fascinating, so so fascinating. She's done in Sydney as well, 878 00:37:26,120 --> 00:37:29,520 Speaker 3: she's done for tours, and that is Yeah. 879 00:37:29,800 --> 00:37:33,520 Speaker 2: I basically purely only listen to true crime podcasts, like 880 00:37:33,600 --> 00:37:35,920 Speaker 2: I don't miss the thing like I'm in this you 881 00:37:35,960 --> 00:37:38,080 Speaker 2: said before when you're in the history. I don't listen 882 00:37:38,080 --> 00:37:39,919 Speaker 2: to Shameless. I don't listen to Abby, I don't listen 883 00:37:39,960 --> 00:37:41,600 Speaker 2: to my own. I don't listen to any of the 884 00:37:41,680 --> 00:37:44,040 Speaker 2: like podcasts you'd expect me to listen to. I am 885 00:37:44,160 --> 00:37:47,560 Speaker 2: true crime, I gut yeah, bones cracking. 886 00:37:48,080 --> 00:37:50,960 Speaker 3: I did a true crime LA one with David the Medium, 887 00:37:51,000 --> 00:37:53,840 Speaker 3: and we went to sites where people had been murdered. 888 00:37:54,120 --> 00:37:56,600 Speaker 3: I'll send that to you, my god. So we went 889 00:37:56,680 --> 00:37:58,480 Speaker 3: to where like Sharon Tate had her last mail. But 890 00:37:58,480 --> 00:38:01,000 Speaker 3: then we went to where the Charles Manson family. I 891 00:38:01,040 --> 00:38:04,399 Speaker 3: live with this shit I go through. David would tell 892 00:38:04,440 --> 00:38:06,080 Speaker 3: me what they die. He's like, I feel like this 893 00:38:06,120 --> 00:38:08,239 Speaker 3: person died from stabbing, Like he didn't know any of 894 00:38:08,239 --> 00:38:09,279 Speaker 3: the fights I took him to do. 895 00:38:09,520 --> 00:38:12,400 Speaker 2: At the moment, I'm really obsessed with It's still true crime, 896 00:38:12,920 --> 00:38:16,640 Speaker 2: con artists, catfishes, cults. 897 00:38:17,200 --> 00:38:20,640 Speaker 3: Matt's just done the composing for a whole TV show 898 00:38:20,680 --> 00:38:21,839 Speaker 3: documentary all about it. 899 00:38:21,960 --> 00:38:22,400 Speaker 1: Amazing. 900 00:38:22,560 --> 00:38:24,719 Speaker 3: I'll send it to you, amazing. He can't hear us, 901 00:38:25,640 --> 00:38:27,439 Speaker 3: but yees. So I just just to nerd out over 902 00:38:27,440 --> 00:38:29,600 Speaker 3: that one. I'm reading Boycefallow's Universe at the moment. 903 00:38:29,880 --> 00:38:32,000 Speaker 1: Okay, I'm want a quitter. 904 00:38:33,080 --> 00:38:33,680 Speaker 3: Is this the book? 905 00:38:34,719 --> 00:38:38,240 Speaker 2: I'm not a quitter. I haven't finished it, and I hate. 906 00:38:38,040 --> 00:38:40,880 Speaker 3: Myself for it. It's still it's dense. 907 00:38:41,280 --> 00:38:43,719 Speaker 2: But I also, because I'm such a traditionalist and a 908 00:38:43,719 --> 00:38:45,879 Speaker 2: book lover, I won't see the film until I've read 909 00:38:45,880 --> 00:38:48,319 Speaker 2: the book. So I can't watch the film, which they're 910 00:38:48,400 --> 00:38:51,120 Speaker 2: reading right now, say with crawd Ads. 911 00:38:51,640 --> 00:38:54,239 Speaker 3: I don't even know what that is. What is it? 912 00:38:54,320 --> 00:38:55,920 Speaker 1: Something about singing with cowd ads. 913 00:38:56,000 --> 00:38:58,759 Speaker 2: It's one of those books that everyone was reading. Can't 914 00:38:58,760 --> 00:39:00,879 Speaker 2: get into it, don't love it, so therefore can't watch 915 00:39:00,880 --> 00:39:01,240 Speaker 2: the film. 916 00:39:01,400 --> 00:39:02,239 Speaker 1: So here's my thing. 917 00:39:02,280 --> 00:39:04,480 Speaker 3: Though, I've written to casting because I want an audition 918 00:39:04,600 --> 00:39:06,440 Speaker 3: for voice players Universe. I was like, I got to 919 00:39:06,520 --> 00:39:09,239 Speaker 3: manifest this shit, and so I'm reading it. Yeah, but 920 00:39:09,280 --> 00:39:11,960 Speaker 3: it's not my style either. It's not my usual reading. 921 00:39:12,200 --> 00:39:14,719 Speaker 2: Struggle to get into it, and I love books and 922 00:39:14,760 --> 00:39:16,640 Speaker 2: I'm not a quitter and I haven't given up on it. 923 00:39:17,400 --> 00:39:20,960 Speaker 2: But it's also collecting dust in my big stack of books. 924 00:39:21,239 --> 00:39:23,680 Speaker 2: It's the batty come in yet as Titus coming yet. Yes, 925 00:39:23,960 --> 00:39:28,239 Speaker 2: I see, that's what got me. No, I also find no. 926 00:39:28,400 --> 00:39:30,560 Speaker 2: One of my guy friend who's a massive book work. 927 00:39:30,600 --> 00:39:32,000 Speaker 2: When I was telling about these books that I was 928 00:39:32,000 --> 00:39:33,400 Speaker 2: struggling with you in a row that I was like, 929 00:39:34,320 --> 00:39:37,120 Speaker 2: he said, do you struggle to relate to a male protagonist? 930 00:39:38,080 --> 00:39:40,520 Speaker 2: Which I thought was an interesting take, But also no, 931 00:39:40,640 --> 00:39:43,279 Speaker 2: because those three books I just literally annihilated. 932 00:39:44,200 --> 00:39:46,799 Speaker 1: It's a male protagonist, so I definitely know. 933 00:39:47,280 --> 00:39:51,279 Speaker 3: So that's a young boy the protagonist. Like, No, No, 934 00:39:51,320 --> 00:39:53,400 Speaker 3: Titus is the batty. You're not on his side though. 935 00:39:53,320 --> 00:39:56,680 Speaker 2: No, I know, but it's just very masculine. 936 00:39:57,560 --> 00:39:58,040 Speaker 1: I mustn't me. 937 00:39:58,120 --> 00:39:59,600 Speaker 3: As I'm reading, I'm like, shit, there's not much I 938 00:39:59,640 --> 00:40:03,240 Speaker 3: can order for here. No, because you cast you cast 939 00:40:03,280 --> 00:40:05,640 Speaker 3: as your like I always look at it through a 940 00:40:05,719 --> 00:40:08,120 Speaker 3: producer's brain because I want to act right, and so 941 00:40:08,200 --> 00:40:10,399 Speaker 3: I'll be like, oh good, I auditioned for the note. Nope, 942 00:40:10,920 --> 00:40:14,239 Speaker 3: I'm aged out there or you know, like it's really interesting. 943 00:40:14,280 --> 00:40:17,000 Speaker 3: But I I hope for you one day. 944 00:40:17,160 --> 00:40:19,160 Speaker 2: I think you're definitely going to write your autobiography. I 945 00:40:19,160 --> 00:40:22,320 Speaker 2: think that's so one hundred percent, And if you get stuck, 946 00:40:22,360 --> 00:40:22,719 Speaker 2: call me. 947 00:40:22,840 --> 00:40:23,240 Speaker 1: I will. 948 00:40:24,000 --> 00:40:27,440 Speaker 2: I think that the dream to write about anxiety and 949 00:40:27,480 --> 00:40:30,880 Speaker 2: helping young people with that is really awesome too. 950 00:40:31,040 --> 00:40:32,239 Speaker 3: But I think you'll write. 951 00:40:31,960 --> 00:40:33,160 Speaker 1: A fiction one day. 952 00:40:33,800 --> 00:40:36,640 Speaker 2: Yeah, I'd put it out there to the universe. Crime 953 00:40:36,680 --> 00:40:40,200 Speaker 2: fiction mate, Oh my god, do it. I basically am 954 00:40:40,239 --> 00:40:42,160 Speaker 2: like a detective at this point, Like I watched there 955 00:40:42,239 --> 00:40:43,719 Speaker 2: is a crime like true crime show. 956 00:40:43,760 --> 00:40:45,920 Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, well, that's so obvious. First of all, 957 00:40:46,719 --> 00:40:47,440 Speaker 1: can I ask? 958 00:40:47,520 --> 00:40:49,319 Speaker 3: And I know this is such an annoying question, but 959 00:40:49,360 --> 00:40:51,160 Speaker 3: I just got to It's a good way to finish 960 00:40:51,400 --> 00:40:54,200 Speaker 3: with someone like you that has so much potential to 961 00:40:54,239 --> 00:40:55,799 Speaker 3: do so many different things. You could go in any 962 00:40:55,800 --> 00:40:57,799 Speaker 3: way you wanted to. If we were to look into 963 00:40:57,840 --> 00:40:59,840 Speaker 3: a crystal ball, like where would you like to be 964 00:41:00,000 --> 00:41:04,560 Speaker 3: five years from now? Obviously bambinos marrying all those beautiful things, 965 00:41:04,880 --> 00:41:06,240 Speaker 3: but what about career wise? 966 00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:09,840 Speaker 2: So I definitely I would love the podcast to really 967 00:41:09,920 --> 00:41:11,840 Speaker 2: pick up and take off. It's such a as you 968 00:41:11,840 --> 00:41:13,640 Speaker 2: would know, it's a really hard industry. There's so many 969 00:41:13,640 --> 00:41:17,000 Speaker 2: podcasts at the moment, especially in my category. I really 970 00:41:17,040 --> 00:41:20,239 Speaker 2: want that to be more commercially successful so I can 971 00:41:20,280 --> 00:41:23,160 Speaker 2: take a step away from influencing. So it's not my 972 00:41:23,200 --> 00:41:26,759 Speaker 2: bread and butter. But I'm currently working on creating a 973 00:41:26,880 --> 00:41:30,399 Speaker 2: support network for young cares of dementia. That's something I'm 974 00:41:30,400 --> 00:41:32,920 Speaker 2: really passionate about. I want to write a book, maybe two, 975 00:41:33,800 --> 00:41:38,279 Speaker 2: but yeah, podcasting and ideally radio, like basically Abbi Chatfield's life. 976 00:41:38,320 --> 00:41:40,439 Speaker 2: If I could just have Abbi Chatfield's life, that would 977 00:41:40,440 --> 00:41:40,960 Speaker 2: be sweet. 978 00:41:41,000 --> 00:41:43,239 Speaker 1: Hosting, podcasting, presenting. 979 00:41:43,719 --> 00:41:45,799 Speaker 3: I could see you doing loads of radio too, because 980 00:41:45,840 --> 00:41:47,000 Speaker 3: you're just such a chatty kathy. 981 00:41:47,280 --> 00:41:48,359 Speaker 1: Yeah, way too chatty cat. 982 00:41:48,440 --> 00:41:49,200 Speaker 3: No, it's great. 983 00:41:49,640 --> 00:41:51,560 Speaker 2: So when I worked at Macca's when I was fourteen 984 00:41:51,560 --> 00:41:54,600 Speaker 2: and nine months, I was pulled off drive through. I 985 00:41:54,640 --> 00:41:56,480 Speaker 2: would hold it up for too long because I was 986 00:41:56,520 --> 00:41:57,640 Speaker 2: talking to every family. 987 00:41:57,840 --> 00:41:59,520 Speaker 3: Do you know. My first job at that age was 988 00:41:59,520 --> 00:42:02,640 Speaker 3: Brumbies breakery, and I got in trouble because I used 989 00:42:02,680 --> 00:42:04,399 Speaker 3: to hit the discount button too much for the little 990 00:42:04,400 --> 00:42:05,920 Speaker 3: old men because we hadn't. 991 00:42:05,960 --> 00:42:07,479 Speaker 1: Like it so us. 992 00:42:07,680 --> 00:42:09,799 Speaker 3: My new things is so I pulled me. It's something 993 00:42:09,920 --> 00:42:12,400 Speaker 3: like we can see you press the discount button three times. 994 00:42:12,400 --> 00:42:13,960 Speaker 3: When the old guys come in, I was like, well, 995 00:42:14,160 --> 00:42:16,560 Speaker 3: how much money they're playing with their like little twenty 996 00:42:16,640 --> 00:42:19,640 Speaker 3: cent pieces and it's a bread roll. Blest mate, I 997 00:42:19,680 --> 00:42:22,440 Speaker 3: got so much trouble Telli SMI thank you for jumping 998 00:42:22,480 --> 00:42:25,840 Speaker 3: on the pod. Long time coming, long time coming, my friend. 999 00:42:26,320 --> 00:42:28,600 Speaker 1: Good to see you, welcome home, Thank you. 1000 00:42:31,360 --> 00:42:37,080 Speaker 3: That's a wrap on another episode of Fearlessly Failing. As always, 1001 00:42:37,160 --> 00:42:40,520 Speaker 3: thank you to our guests, and let's continue the conversation 1002 00:42:40,719 --> 00:42:46,480 Speaker 3: on Instagram. I'm at Yumo Lullerberry. This potty my word 1003 00:42:46,520 --> 00:42:51,239 Speaker 3: for podcast is available on all streaming platforms. I'd love 1004 00:42:51,280 --> 00:42:54,319 Speaker 3: it if you could subscribe, rape and comment, and of 1005 00:42:54,440 --> 00:42:55,960 Speaker 3: course spread the love 1006 00:43:00,280 --> 00:43:01,080 Speaker 2: To repate its