WEBVTT - Summer Ask Uncut with Britt and Ben! 0:00:09.600 --> 0:00:12.360 Hi, guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life Undercut. 0:00:12.480 --> 0:00:16.320 I'm Brittany and I'm Ben. Well, there you go, Ben's here. 0:00:16.480 --> 0:00:19.200 Ben is in the house. So we are on our 0:00:19.720 --> 0:00:22.239 quote unquote Christmas break, but we never managed to do 0:00:22.280 --> 0:00:25.280 a full break, so we've been drip feeding some little 0:00:25.280 --> 0:00:28.840 extra episodes for you. And Ben was very excited to 0:00:28.960 --> 0:00:32.159 hear that you guys wanted him to guest host and 0:00:32.320 --> 0:00:33.040 ask gun cut. 0:00:33.360 --> 0:00:35.680 God only knows why people want to have my opinion, 0:00:35.720 --> 0:00:37.480 but I'll try and do my best. 0:00:37.600 --> 0:00:40.520 Well, we'll see how it goes. So we are recording 0:00:40.560 --> 0:00:43.640 this just before Christmas, just so you know you'll be 0:00:43.680 --> 0:00:45.720 listening to this. Christmas will be well and truly done. 0:00:45.960 --> 0:00:48.879 But tomorrow Ben and I are heading to Switzerland to 0:00:49.120 --> 0:00:51.440 see his family for Christmas and will be my very 0:00:51.479 --> 0:00:55.280 first home in Switzerland with Ben's family, meeting his friends 0:00:55.360 --> 0:00:57.520 in his hometown. I'm really excited. 0:00:57.960 --> 0:01:00.840 Yes, So, as you might remember, I took my sister 0:01:01.040 --> 0:01:03.640 Sherry and her husband Jay before I even took you 0:01:03.720 --> 0:01:04.400 to my home time. 0:01:04.760 --> 0:01:06.240 I do remember that we do. 0:01:06.160 --> 0:01:08.240 Things a little bit different in our relationship, don't we. 0:01:08.520 --> 0:01:10.720 Yeah, it was hard because obviously we don't have a 0:01:10.720 --> 0:01:12.280 normal relationship of sorts. 0:01:12.360 --> 0:01:15.640 You were busy eating picnipples in the jungle, so you 0:01:15.800 --> 0:01:16.400 really take care. 0:01:16.680 --> 0:01:17.280 Is that what it was? 0:01:17.440 --> 0:01:20.360 Yeah, it was literally the first week of you being 0:01:20.400 --> 0:01:21.000 in a jungle. 0:01:21.200 --> 0:01:24.200 I really drew the short straw. Yeah. So Sherry and 0:01:24.319 --> 0:01:27.520 Jay went back to Ben's hometown to say with his 0:01:27.600 --> 0:01:29.640 family and to meet his friends and see where Ben 0:01:29.720 --> 0:01:32.280 rup before I did. So I feel like I'm finally 0:01:32.319 --> 0:01:34.600 playing catch up and we're going to be spending Christmas 0:01:34.680 --> 0:01:36.560 with his family. So we are going to do an 0:01:36.640 --> 0:01:39.520 ask Gun cut from some questions that you guys wrote in. 0:01:39.840 --> 0:01:42.600 Some are just general asking cuts, some were specifically for 0:01:42.680 --> 0:01:45.240 Ben to answer so that there was a male perspective. 0:01:45.760 --> 0:01:48.200 And even when I do ask gun cuts back home 0:01:48.520 --> 0:01:50.640 a lot of the time, if it's, you know, from 0:01:50.640 --> 0:01:53.560 a male's perspective, I will ask Ben or I'll run 0:01:53.640 --> 0:01:56.639 Ben through so I can get both sides of the story, 0:01:56.680 --> 0:01:58.680 you know, Because at the end of the day, Laurie 0:01:58.680 --> 0:02:01.080 and I can always give our opinions based off experience 0:02:01.120 --> 0:02:03.840 and relationships and the knowledge we've learned along the way. 0:02:03.880 --> 0:02:05.640 But I think it's always really important and nice to 0:02:05.680 --> 0:02:08.839 have a perspective from a man. So I often run 0:02:08.960 --> 0:02:09.880 questions by Ben and. 0:02:10.000 --> 0:02:12.280 I did recognize some of my opinions on the pods. 0:02:13.440 --> 0:02:15.600 Well, I do believe it or not value your opinion? Ben? 0:02:15.720 --> 0:02:18.160 Yeah, normally get a quick FaceTime called quick, Quick, Quick, 0:02:18.200 --> 0:02:18.880 tell me what you think? 0:02:19.120 --> 0:02:20.119 How many times to you master? 0:02:20.400 --> 0:02:20.640 Quick? 0:02:21.560 --> 0:02:22.840 Quick? Do you watch porn? Quick? 0:02:23.240 --> 0:02:26.040 He's not going to answer, she's lying. 0:02:26.280 --> 0:02:28.880 But before we get into the questions, we did get 0:02:29.000 --> 0:02:32.200 quite a few questions coming in just about how it's 0:02:32.200 --> 0:02:35.320 been seeing each other again, our plans for the future, 0:02:35.480 --> 0:02:37.400 wedding plans, kid plans. 0:02:37.600 --> 0:02:39.079 How a wedding plans? 0:02:39.160 --> 0:02:41.560 Going Hey, yeah, that's a good question, Ben, How our 0:02:41.600 --> 0:02:42.120 wedding plans. 0:02:42.360 --> 0:02:44.960 It's a question for you because because you don't know, 0:02:45.320 --> 0:02:48.440 I do know, but I feel like you have the 0:02:48.520 --> 0:02:51.560 right to veto, so I feel like it's better asking you. 0:02:51.720 --> 0:02:54.160 All right, let's do an on the spot quick. I'm 0:02:54.200 --> 0:02:56.760 going to ask you three questions about our wedding and 0:02:56.800 --> 0:02:59.280 you are going to have five seconds. 0:02:58.880 --> 0:03:00.960 To answer them generous. 0:03:01.360 --> 0:03:03.720 If you don't answer them because you don't know the 0:03:03.760 --> 0:03:07.200 wedding plans, then you have to get me a surprise. Okay, 0:03:07.200 --> 0:03:10.760 all right, this is going to be a disaster. What 0:03:10.840 --> 0:03:19.440 date is our wedding it is two. Oh my god, 0:03:19.480 --> 0:03:21.160 it's wrong. You just got that wrong. 0:03:21.280 --> 0:03:23.400 It's the wrong month, but it's the right date. 0:03:23.600 --> 0:03:25.400 Oh okay, well I'll see you in the wrong month. 0:03:26.800 --> 0:03:30.400 I can't believe you, okay. Question two, what is the 0:03:30.480 --> 0:03:31.840 name of our catering company? 0:03:33.600 --> 0:03:40.200 I've oh, I want to say two yes. 0:03:39.520 --> 0:03:42.200 With one second. I didn't think you were going to 0:03:42.240 --> 0:03:45.839 get that no. I mean if there's anything you don't date, 0:03:45.920 --> 0:03:47.160 but you know the food. 0:03:47.240 --> 0:03:49.560 I know all the details that aren't important. 0:03:50.480 --> 0:03:52.680 How do you know the food company and not the 0:03:52.800 --> 0:03:53.840 date of our wedding? 0:03:54.120 --> 0:03:55.839 I don't know if the name just stuck in my head. 0:03:56.080 --> 0:03:57.480 Well that's the thing. You don't even know what're eating? 0:03:57.520 --> 0:03:58.800 Knife picked it all. 0:03:58.800 --> 0:04:00.960 Right, Well you had the luxury of eating it all, 0:04:01.040 --> 0:04:01.800 so I wouldn't know. 0:04:02.160 --> 0:04:02.839 I did it all. 0:04:03.520 --> 0:04:07.040 And Keisha, for that manner, was taking husband duties that day. 0:04:07.280 --> 0:04:09.360 We did go on a food tasting bender and BALI. 0:04:09.680 --> 0:04:12.760 Question three, what's the name of my wedding dress designer? 0:04:13.680 --> 0:04:16.520 I want to say something with Khalil, but I'm not sure. 0:04:17.440 --> 0:04:19.080 I'm not sure it's very famous, though. 0:04:19.279 --> 0:04:20.320 Please lock your answer in. 0:04:20.640 --> 0:04:23.279 It's doing a great job putting up with you. 0:04:24.040 --> 0:04:26.240 We're half right, Khalil, Stephen Khalil. 0:04:26.320 --> 0:04:28.160 There you go. That counts all right. 0:04:28.160 --> 0:04:30.560 I'm going to give you one bonus question. Yeah, what's 0:04:30.560 --> 0:04:34.560 the name of our wedding planner, Amelia? Where does she work? 0:04:38.440 --> 0:04:41.680 Love and last? No, not love and lust. 0:04:44.720 --> 0:04:47.560 I actually was expecting you to be so bad at 0:04:47.600 --> 0:04:48.240 our wedding. 0:04:48.080 --> 0:04:50.240 Planning something with love love. 0:04:50.400 --> 0:04:52.000 No, that's incorrect. 0:04:53.240 --> 0:04:56.680 Easy weddings, Easy weddings. Oh my god, what's the other one? 0:04:57.040 --> 0:04:57.760 Lost in love? 0:04:59.520 --> 0:05:04.760 Yeah, hello, easy weddings, Amelia. You're doing a great job. 0:05:05.040 --> 0:05:05.960 This is a disaster. 0:05:06.279 --> 0:05:08.839 Although I don't know where you work, you're doing a 0:05:08.839 --> 0:05:09.320 great job. 0:05:10.960 --> 0:05:13.280 Okay, Well, you're definitely getting me a surprise now because 0:05:13.279 --> 0:05:14.880 you're turning up to our wedding a month late. 0:05:15.040 --> 0:05:16.800 Yeah, that would be an issue. 0:05:16.960 --> 0:05:20.120 Okay. So we've just had Sherry and Jay staying with 0:05:20.200 --> 0:05:22.279 us for a week and baby Maya. 0:05:22.400 --> 0:05:23.240 Yeah, so cute. 0:05:23.320 --> 0:05:26.000 She is tiny. So we have just a two bedroom 0:05:26.000 --> 0:05:29.240 flat here. It's very small, and we're all together for 0:05:29.279 --> 0:05:29.640 the week. 0:05:29.880 --> 0:05:31.600 I think it's quite big, to be honest. 0:05:31.640 --> 0:05:35.839 Ben has I mean, you've never held a baby like that, 0:05:35.920 --> 0:05:38.000 You've never been around a new born baby like that. 0:05:38.040 --> 0:05:40.480 You didn't know anything about it. You tried to give 0:05:40.520 --> 0:05:41.000 her fanter. 0:05:41.320 --> 0:05:43.320 No, it didn't. It was you. 0:05:43.279 --> 0:05:45.120 Tried to give her a full meal, Like does she 0:05:45.240 --> 0:05:45.760 need food? 0:05:45.920 --> 0:05:50.280 I didn't know that babies can't drink water. It's baffling 0:05:50.320 --> 0:05:52.640 to me. I did not know that. I thought water 0:05:52.839 --> 0:05:56.279 is the essence of all life and we all need water, 0:05:56.520 --> 0:05:57.919 and well we do. 0:05:58.040 --> 0:06:00.720 Except babies get it from breast milk. Because breast milk 0:06:00.800 --> 0:06:01.760 is so incredible, I know. 0:06:01.839 --> 0:06:03.600 But a little water doesn't harm, does it? 0:06:03.640 --> 0:06:05.400 Well, I don't know. I just not allowed to have it. 0:06:05.600 --> 0:06:06.440 Wow, my mistake. 0:06:06.640 --> 0:06:10.960 Well, the question is has it changed, Like, how do 0:06:11.040 --> 0:06:13.720 you feel about kids now? Because everyone knows that we've 0:06:13.760 --> 0:06:16.600 been a bit confused, a bit on the fence, been 0:06:16.680 --> 0:06:19.280 unsure of our future for a multitude of reasons if 0:06:19.279 --> 0:06:21.640 we can even have them, or if we want them, 0:06:21.720 --> 0:06:23.520 or when we want them, or how it's going to work. 0:06:23.800 --> 0:06:25.680 How do you feel after we spent a week with 0:06:25.880 --> 0:06:26.480 a baby? 0:06:26.600 --> 0:06:30.680 Well, disclaimer, I haven't changed any nappies, so no. 0:06:30.760 --> 0:06:32.800 There was one exploiting period that went out to her 0:06:32.839 --> 0:06:34.760 neck on that was. 0:06:35.240 --> 0:06:38.479 Yeah, I haven't changed any nappies. So I guess if 0:06:38.520 --> 0:06:41.599 all the babies, newborns are like Maya, it would be 0:06:41.640 --> 0:06:45.080 a dream. She hardly cried. She was very easy going, 0:06:45.360 --> 0:06:48.279 such a happy, happy little toddler, happy little baby. 0:06:48.360 --> 0:06:49.400 It's not a toddler yet. 0:06:49.560 --> 0:06:52.000 Well see that shows how much I know. 0:06:52.360 --> 0:06:55.320 A happy little. 0:06:54.480 --> 0:06:57.840 Yeah, happy little squid. Then it makes me think that, 0:06:58.640 --> 0:07:01.240 you know, with the Hockley jeans and everything, everything will 0:07:01.279 --> 0:07:03.200 be fine and it will not be difficult to have 0:07:03.279 --> 0:07:06.080 a baby. But obviously well aware that it can be 0:07:06.200 --> 0:07:09.280 very stressful, especially you do know I like to sleep 0:07:10.400 --> 0:07:13.120 I like to sleep in. And we did say if 0:07:13.160 --> 0:07:15.200 we do have kids, then I will take the late 0:07:15.320 --> 0:07:17.880 night shift and you will take the early morning shift 0:07:18.000 --> 0:07:19.320 because you're a morning person. 0:07:19.640 --> 0:07:21.480 But does it make you want a baby? Did she 0:07:21.520 --> 0:07:22.000 make you one? 0:07:22.400 --> 0:07:27.160 It didn't make me not want one. That's the most 0:07:27.200 --> 0:07:31.160 ben answer ever. Yeah, we've done this process to have kids, 0:07:31.160 --> 0:07:34.360 so yes, we want to have kids. If they're like Maya, 0:07:34.400 --> 0:07:36.000 then yeah, we can have a kid right now to 0:07:36.080 --> 0:07:40.240 choose if we can, we put this in somewhere that 0:07:40.280 --> 0:07:41.360 we want a kid like Maya. 0:07:41.480 --> 0:07:44.280 Disclaimer mostly that's not correct. 0:07:44.400 --> 0:07:46.480 No, we're probably going to have twins. You know my 0:07:46.600 --> 0:07:48.520 theory about this, well, it's not. 0:07:48.480 --> 0:07:51.760 A theory because IVF you have double the chance of 0:07:51.800 --> 0:07:54.520 twins with IBF, and Ben really wants twins, so he 0:07:54.520 --> 0:07:57.120 wanted the fertility doctors to put like twenty five Embrews 0:07:57.160 --> 0:07:58.280 in me. He's like, put them all in. 0:07:58.680 --> 0:08:01.840 She said, look, if you IVF, your chances of having 0:08:01.840 --> 0:08:05.160 twins doubles. So in my head it's like, yeah, from 0:08:05.200 --> 0:08:07.840 twenty five percent to fifty Like what a result, Like 0:08:07.960 --> 0:08:10.400 surely this will happened, And she goes, no, calm down, man, 0:08:10.440 --> 0:08:13.640 it's from two to four percent. Yeah. I was like, well, 0:08:13.680 --> 0:08:16.160 I'll take the extra two percent. Then twins will be hectic. 0:08:16.440 --> 0:08:19.000 I feel good about kids. I feel good about kids. Yeah, 0:08:19.440 --> 0:08:20.040 how do you feel? 0:08:22.480 --> 0:08:25.520 I mean, yeah, I agree. She's definitely a unicorn baby. 0:08:25.520 --> 0:08:27.600 That makes you think that like, oh my god, piss cake, 0:08:27.680 --> 0:08:29.680 I could do this dream job, Like if I get 0:08:29.680 --> 0:08:32.560 this little cute munchkin attached to me, that is a 0:08:32.640 --> 0:08:35.679 dream boat. Doesn't cry, doesn't she sleeps eleven hours through 0:08:35.720 --> 0:08:36.080 the night. 0:08:36.840 --> 0:08:37.320 Amazing. 0:08:37.640 --> 0:08:41.319 But I also it is a stark reminder too. It 0:08:41.400 --> 0:08:46.120 was a stark reminder of how much things change, like 0:08:46.160 --> 0:08:48.959 how everything was more difficult. Yeah, like even though she's 0:08:49.000 --> 0:08:49.480 a great. 0:08:49.360 --> 0:08:51.000 Child, everything till longer. 0:08:51.160 --> 0:08:53.760 Everything takes longer. Just getting out of the house takes longer. 0:08:54.200 --> 0:08:56.679 Trying to have a shower is harder because you've got 0:08:56.679 --> 0:08:58.520 to find someone else to take her in that time, 0:08:58.600 --> 0:09:02.199 and they change your life. So it's not that I 0:09:02.240 --> 0:09:04.520 wouldn't be able to adapt to that, it's just trying 0:09:04.559 --> 0:09:06.160 to find out when you think that you're going to 0:09:06.200 --> 0:09:09.440 be ready for that. And I think my problem is 0:09:09.440 --> 0:09:11.760 I'm never going to think that I'm ready. I'm never 0:09:11.800 --> 0:09:13.920 going to say, yes, now's the time to drop a 0:09:13.920 --> 0:09:14.680 bomb of my life. 0:09:14.720 --> 0:09:18.280 I don't think anybody is and knows when they are ready, 0:09:18.320 --> 0:09:20.200 you know, like there's always a little bit of doubt 0:09:20.679 --> 0:09:23.320 or there's always something that's like, oh, maybe you know. 0:09:23.480 --> 0:09:26.320 But what I do understand now is when people say that, 0:09:26.840 --> 0:09:29.439 like the laugh I have for Maya, this little cute 0:09:29.440 --> 0:09:32.640 little baby is you know, through the roof, and when 0:09:32.760 --> 0:09:34.600 parents say, you know, it's one of the greatest things 0:09:34.640 --> 0:09:37.360 in the world, but you're also so bloody tired, Like 0:09:37.920 --> 0:09:40.400 I understand it. Like she was in the room next 0:09:40.400 --> 0:09:42.360 door and she slept for eleven hours, and then. 0:09:42.440 --> 0:09:43.240 Ben was still tired. 0:09:43.280 --> 0:09:46.040 He's like, wow, I was on uncle daycare and I 0:09:46.080 --> 0:09:48.200 was like, oh, I'm going to hand her back. Oh A, 0:09:49.200 --> 0:09:51.680 it's just I am clueless. Like I said, I would 0:09:51.679 --> 0:09:54.240 have fed a water or fantaut or given a piece 0:09:54.280 --> 0:09:56.160 of my pizza or whatever. So it was just like, 0:09:56.200 --> 0:09:57.560 you can't do this, you can't do that. 0:09:58.440 --> 0:10:00.880 It's a learning curve. But I think I biggest problem too, 0:10:01.040 --> 0:10:03.680 is if we lived together. I believe it would be 0:10:03.679 --> 0:10:06.320 an easier decision and we should probably be doing it 0:10:06.360 --> 0:10:09.360 now for sure, But we don't live together. We're obviously 0:10:09.360 --> 0:10:11.200 aware of that, and we're aware that we don't know 0:10:11.240 --> 0:10:14.360 when we'll be together, which means it's really hard, especially 0:10:14.400 --> 0:10:17.000 with IVF, because we have to literally book in the 0:10:17.080 --> 0:10:20.000 day and go in and say, today's the day, let's 0:10:20.000 --> 0:10:21.839 hope that this works, and then in nine months we'll 0:10:21.840 --> 0:10:24.920 have a baby. So when you're planning it like that, 0:10:25.440 --> 0:10:27.960 you have to plan everything else around your life as well, 0:10:28.040 --> 0:10:30.120 which we don't have. We don't have the plans to 0:10:30.160 --> 0:10:31.760 be together yet, as much. 0:10:31.640 --> 0:10:34.040 As we want to be, we're not quite there yet. 0:10:34.080 --> 0:10:37.640 We're not there yet. Our careers working on it, We're trying, Yeah, 0:10:37.880 --> 0:10:40.360 we're working on it. Our careers and our life don't 0:10:40.600 --> 0:10:45.400 yet align with that. And you know, we're getting married 0:10:45.760 --> 0:10:48.200 and then two days later we have to go Wow, 0:10:48.280 --> 0:10:51.160 actually one night we actually only oh we get one 0:10:51.280 --> 0:10:54.600 night together after our wedding, and then Ben flies back 0:10:54.640 --> 0:10:56.319 to training and I have to fly back to work 0:10:56.400 --> 0:10:58.920 in Australia. So we don't even get the honeymoon. We 0:10:58.960 --> 0:11:01.520 get no time to other except for that week of 0:11:01.559 --> 0:11:04.559 our wedding. Yeah, which is yeah, I mean that's a 0:11:04.600 --> 0:11:08.680 stark reminder for people as to just how hard this 0:11:08.920 --> 0:11:12.320 is and how our lives are not yet in a 0:11:12.360 --> 0:11:16.559 place for a family because I don't want I personally 0:11:16.600 --> 0:11:18.320 and neither is Ben. But I don't want to have 0:11:18.320 --> 0:11:20.920 a baby and you not be there. I don't want 0:11:20.920 --> 0:11:22.559 to be doing it alone as like a single mom 0:11:22.600 --> 0:11:23.079 in Sydney. 0:11:23.240 --> 0:11:25.720 I definitely want to be a present, a present dad 0:11:25.760 --> 0:11:29.000 and be there for you like that time. It was 0:11:29.000 --> 0:11:30.679 so important for me to be there for you when 0:11:30.720 --> 0:11:33.200 you had your IVF round and you had your little 0:11:33.200 --> 0:11:34.440 procedure and. 0:11:34.360 --> 0:11:37.440 You had your ejaculation into how less we forgot. 0:11:37.720 --> 0:11:39.680 Yeah, yeah, it was just really important for me to 0:11:39.720 --> 0:11:43.480 be there to show my support for you because you know, 0:11:43.480 --> 0:11:45.640 it did feel like you got the bad end of 0:11:45.679 --> 0:11:48.120 the stick, you know, got the bad end of having 0:11:48.160 --> 0:11:50.040 a little procedure done, and you were in pain and 0:11:50.080 --> 0:11:52.960 all the injections you applied and all that kind of stuff. 0:11:53.000 --> 0:11:54.839 So all I had to do was was show up 0:11:54.840 --> 0:12:00.000 and masturbate. Yeah, masturbate and give my little swimmers and 0:12:00.080 --> 0:12:02.120 so did the rest. So but I definitely want to 0:12:02.120 --> 0:12:05.640 be there for you and be there for our potential babies. 0:12:08.600 --> 0:12:12.120 We do want that part of our life. And to 0:12:12.240 --> 0:12:16.319 be honest, seeing you with Maya was definitely like an 0:12:16.360 --> 0:12:21.000 overyting sexy dad. You went the dad looking and dad, 0:12:21.080 --> 0:12:23.160 but seeing you with her did get over is tingling 0:12:23.200 --> 0:12:25.160 for sure, because I think that's what you You always 0:12:25.160 --> 0:12:26.679 wonder what your partner is going to look like or 0:12:26.720 --> 0:12:29.679 be not look like, Sorry, will my partner be a deal? 0:12:30.480 --> 0:12:33.120 You wonder what they're going to be like as a parent, 0:12:33.640 --> 0:12:36.040 And I think that that's a big part of making 0:12:36.080 --> 0:12:38.079 decisions too, on like if you want to have kids, 0:12:38.120 --> 0:12:40.480 and I feel like maybe with a bit of training 0:12:40.520 --> 0:12:42.160 and a bit of education, so you don't feed that 0:12:42.360 --> 0:12:44.480 two month d a steak, you'll be a great dad. 0:12:44.880 --> 0:12:47.319 Thank you, You're welcome, thank you, and you'll be a 0:12:47.320 --> 0:12:47.800 great mom. 0:12:47.840 --> 0:12:51.360 All right, thank you. I should get into the questions, Yes, 0:12:51.440 --> 0:12:54.640 let's do it. Question number one. Okay, I think you're 0:12:54.640 --> 0:12:56.679 going to have a strong opinion about this. My husband 0:12:56.720 --> 0:12:59.000 and I have a six month old baby. I'm a 0:12:59.040 --> 0:13:01.200 stay at home mum and he works full time. I 0:13:01.240 --> 0:13:03.720 make dinner every night, which is always hard cooking with 0:13:03.720 --> 0:13:06.000 a baby, as my husband doesn't get home until six 0:13:06.040 --> 0:13:09.600 point thirty, right when we're about to eat. Last night, 0:13:09.679 --> 0:13:12.920 I made dinner like usual, and in conversation I said, so, 0:13:13.040 --> 0:13:16.480 do you like it? And he responded, that's all right, 0:13:19.280 --> 0:13:21.320 But he said in a way where I knew that 0:13:21.360 --> 0:13:24.199 he really wasn't impressed. This offended me as I put 0:13:24.240 --> 0:13:26.480 a lot of effort in whilst juggling our baby. I 0:13:26.559 --> 0:13:29.080 just don't think he understands I would have been happy 0:13:29.160 --> 0:13:31.200 with just toast for dinner, but I put the effort 0:13:31.200 --> 0:13:34.280 in for him. He thinks it's okay to be honest 0:13:34.400 --> 0:13:36.320 and that he thought dinner was just okay. So he 0:13:36.400 --> 0:13:39.760 told me, hey, it's just okay. My question is, if 0:13:39.760 --> 0:13:42.800 someone makes you something such as dinner, is it okay 0:13:42.880 --> 0:13:45.200 to be honest and say you didn't really like it? 0:13:45.800 --> 0:13:48.240 Or should you just be appreciative that someone put the 0:13:48.320 --> 0:13:50.560 effort in and say, yeah, it was good, even if 0:13:50.600 --> 0:13:54.880 you don't think it was that good. I asked him, Hey, 0:13:54.960 --> 0:13:57.600 if you were at our friend's house, would you say 0:13:57.800 --> 0:14:00.120 that you didn't really like what they made you? Or 0:14:00.120 --> 0:14:04.000 would you pretend? And he said no, of course I wouldn't. 0:14:04.000 --> 0:14:06.040 But this is our home, and I think it's best 0:14:06.040 --> 0:14:08.000 to be honest with you. What do you think? 0:14:08.040 --> 0:14:11.760 Then? Wow, A big question to start with. 0:14:12.120 --> 0:14:13.840 The real serious his topics to start. 0:14:13.920 --> 0:14:16.240 I think we all know that we have different conversations 0:14:16.280 --> 0:14:18.559 at our own house than we do have at other 0:14:18.559 --> 0:14:21.760 people's houses. Right, But it reminds me remember when I 0:14:21.800 --> 0:14:24.640 tried to replicate a dish for you, and I still 0:14:24.640 --> 0:14:26.280 don't know if you liked it to this day, And 0:14:26.320 --> 0:14:28.120 I asked you, I said, do you like your dish? 0:14:28.160 --> 0:14:30.840 And you gave me like a yeah, it's fine. And 0:14:31.240 --> 0:14:33.760 I was thinking, I'm not quite sure if you like 0:14:34.040 --> 0:14:35.800 if you like it what I've made for you, and 0:14:35.880 --> 0:14:37.600 I think, to this day, I'm not quite sure what 0:14:37.680 --> 0:14:38.640 I should make it again. 0:14:38.720 --> 0:14:40.160 And you were wildly offended. 0:14:40.400 --> 0:14:41.520 Yes, yes, I was. 0:14:41.840 --> 0:14:44.240 It hurt your feelings that I said, yeah, it's fine. 0:14:44.440 --> 0:14:46.720 Yeah, also a little bit of pride because I pride 0:14:46.720 --> 0:14:49.080 myself on making good meals for you and You've not 0:14:49.080 --> 0:14:52.160 not liked anything I ever made, So I was like, oh, okay, 0:14:52.320 --> 0:14:54.360 I guess it stops with beta then. Yeah. 0:14:54.360 --> 0:14:56.520 But to be fair, I don't ever cook. You have 0:14:56.600 --> 0:14:58.520 cooked for me. I've cooked for you once since the 0:14:58.600 --> 0:15:00.880 day we met, in like over two years now. 0:15:00.960 --> 0:15:01.800 With my recipe. 0:15:02.240 --> 0:15:05.040 Yeah, And it's just the way our relationship is. That's 0:15:05.080 --> 0:15:07.520 not because I'm lazy. I try to cook. You don't 0:15:07.560 --> 0:15:09.960 want me to like, you love it. You cook everything. 0:15:10.400 --> 0:15:13.440 So I think if I can one time in all 0:15:13.480 --> 0:15:16.040 of that time say that I liked it but didn't 0:15:16.160 --> 0:15:19.720 love it, I think that that's genuinely okay in this situation. 0:15:20.240 --> 0:15:22.400 I think it's okay that your husband is honest. To 0:15:22.440 --> 0:15:25.560 be fair, there's no point pretending. Maybe early on in 0:15:25.560 --> 0:15:28.840 the relationship, like you've just started dating, you're really really 0:15:28.880 --> 0:15:32.280 fresh into dating, You've made a huge effort. I think 0:15:32.320 --> 0:15:35.200 in that situation you just probably lie a little bit. 0:15:35.240 --> 0:15:37.520 You're like, yeah, thank you so much. It was delicious, 0:15:37.560 --> 0:15:40.200 But I'm just fool I just can't eat anymore. But 0:15:40.560 --> 0:15:43.760 at this point, you guys are married, you have a baby. 0:15:44.200 --> 0:15:48.000 Him not liking your food, I don't think he's connected 0:15:48.040 --> 0:15:50.840 with him not appreciating that you did it. He can 0:15:50.880 --> 0:15:53.120 still appreciate that you have gone to the effort to 0:15:53.120 --> 0:15:56.280 cook it, but just doesn't genuinely like the taste. I 0:15:56.280 --> 0:15:58.240 don't think that that has to be offensive to you. 0:15:58.440 --> 0:16:00.160 I guess it depends how he says it and the 0:16:00.200 --> 0:16:02.640 reason he says he doesn't like it. But you don't 0:16:02.680 --> 0:16:04.840 want to when you're married. You don't want to pretend 0:16:04.960 --> 0:16:06.800 that you like something and then for the rest of 0:16:06.800 --> 0:16:08.880 your life have to fake that you like it, because 0:16:08.920 --> 0:16:11.120 you'll continue to cook that meal. Now if he's. 0:16:10.920 --> 0:16:13.640 Faked it, Yeah, I agree. I think you know, we 0:16:13.680 --> 0:16:15.240 don't know what happened at work. Maybe it's had a 0:16:15.280 --> 0:16:18.560 bad day at work or whoever, and you certainly have 0:16:18.680 --> 0:16:22.080 to be appreciative of another person making a meal not 0:16:22.120 --> 0:16:23.800 just for you, but it's for the family, you know, 0:16:23.920 --> 0:16:26.040 Like like she said, she has a six months old 0:16:26.080 --> 0:16:26.440 at home. 0:16:26.480 --> 0:16:29.040 So yeah, but the six month I was not in mistake. 0:16:28.920 --> 0:16:31.440 Yes, but it's part of you know, looking after your family. 0:16:31.480 --> 0:16:34.200 And I mean we've had our lovely niece here for 0:16:34.280 --> 0:16:36.000 a couple of days. It was more hectic than I 0:16:36.000 --> 0:16:38.520 thought it would be, So you know, the partner definitely 0:16:38.520 --> 0:16:40.840 has to be appreciative of the effort that's been made. 0:16:41.280 --> 0:16:43.280 Would you rather that I told you if you made 0:16:43.320 --> 0:16:43.920 me something. 0:16:43.760 --> 0:16:46.160 Yeah, because I'm making it because I think you would 0:16:46.240 --> 0:16:48.920 like it, and then you don't like it or it's 0:16:48.960 --> 0:16:52.160 not your taste, and then you're better off knowing. And 0:16:52.200 --> 0:16:54.640 I think you have to take this not as criticism 0:16:54.760 --> 0:16:57.360 rather than just as okay, just the other person just 0:16:57.360 --> 0:16:58.880 doesn't like it, and that's okay. 0:16:59.120 --> 0:17:00.840 Yeah. And I think if you're reverse it, if your 0:17:01.000 --> 0:17:03.360 husband cooked something for you that you really didn't like, 0:17:03.600 --> 0:17:05.520 would you tell him, like I think it's the way 0:17:05.560 --> 0:17:06.199 you deliver it. 0:17:06.280 --> 0:17:08.760 Yeah, absolutely, just the way you say it, and I. 0:17:08.920 --> 0:17:10.960 Just tell him. I would just tell him I feel 0:17:11.000 --> 0:17:13.359 like you don't appreciate me, and then you can go 0:17:13.440 --> 0:17:15.080 from there, like I feel like you don't appreciate me. 0:17:15.119 --> 0:17:17.159 If you really just didn't like the meal, that's okay, 0:17:17.320 --> 0:17:18.639 Like we can talk about it. But it was the 0:17:18.680 --> 0:17:20.680 way you said it, and I just you know, you're 0:17:20.720 --> 0:17:22.880