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Speaker 1: Christian I connell Christian o'connald's show podcast, What is the

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Speaker 1: worst movie you've ever seen? I've seen quite a lot

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Speaker 1: of bad movies. If you will watch any martial arts movie,

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Speaker 1: you're gonna that's a dangerous game. You're going to see

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Speaker 1: some really great ones, but more average ones at best.

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Speaker 1: And then I saw something which felt like it was

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Speaker 1: directly speaking to me. It's simply they couldn't even bothered

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Speaker 1: with the creative title. They simply called it jiu jitsu. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: And when I saw it's called right, there's nothing there's

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Speaker 1: They made no effort going when a'sked just a style

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Speaker 1: of martial arts. Surely we can't just call it that.

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Speaker 1: That's lazy. No one said, hey, guys, maybe just give

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Speaker 1: it another five minutes in this meeting to say there's

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Speaker 1: annual to other than just calling it jiu jitsu.

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Speaker 2: But when I saw the poster for it and it

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Speaker 2: came out last year, I saw jiu jitsu. I know

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Speaker 2: you love martial arts. I saw Nicholas Cage, your favorite actor.

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Speaker 2: I thought this film is made for Christian. Then I

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Speaker 2: kind of just never heard about the film again until

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Speaker 2: it popped up on stan over the week and I

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Speaker 2: thought you can stream it now. I wonder if Christian's

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Speaker 2: actually seen jiu.

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Speaker 1: Jitsu paid for it twice, so I didn't wait for

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Speaker 1: it to go streaming. It drops on. I think it

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Speaker 1: just I'm not even sure if it had a cinema release.

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Speaker 1: And this isn't anything to do with COVID, just standards.

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Speaker 1: Just stand this out their review and go that other

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Speaker 1: people can't go and see that together. Put that, let

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Speaker 1: the audience find it, hopefully not. But do not put

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Speaker 1: that in public spaces. It's dangerous. It's like a dirty film.

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Speaker 1: I only watch it when nobody else is home.

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Speaker 2: Lock the doors, draw the block.

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Speaker 1: That in your own primacy of your own home. Let's

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Speaker 1: not judge, but do not put it on in public.

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Speaker 1: It is so bad. So you're right on paper that

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Speaker 1: this is made for me. It's about martial art. It's

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Speaker 1: got Nicholas Cage there right, Nicholas Cage is barely in it,

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Speaker 1: and even when he is, is better off without him.

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Speaker 2: But on the poster he's front and center.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, And then you start to watch the way you're

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Speaker 1: right the owning credits, I'm thinking, where is Nicholas Cage.

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Speaker 1: There's all these other names like it. And then it

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Speaker 1: just says at the end, the last credited name says,

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Speaker 1: and Nicholas Cage. When have you even seen the word?

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Speaker 1: And and an actress like he said, put the end in.

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Speaker 1: I don't want to be like I'm with them is

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Speaker 1: them and Nicholas Cage. Let's not even get to where

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Speaker 1: Nicholas Cage finally shows up. You've got to wait a

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Speaker 1: long forty minutes from all the Cage man shows up. Right,

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Speaker 1: it is so bad, and it's like budget, Like you

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Speaker 1: haven't seen a budget movie before. There's a we've never

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Speaker 1: seen this movie before. First of all, it's martial arts

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Speaker 1: hybrid with sci fi. Yeah, already, already there's a whiff

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Speaker 1: of like, I'm not sure about this. Wait, I've never

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Speaker 1: heard this story before. Hang on a minute, you martial

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Speaker 1: artists have got to save humanity from a really violent alien.

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Speaker 1: I've never seen this in like Predator all about twenty

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Speaker 1: thousand other movies. It starts with a comet crashing into

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Speaker 1: earth again, a unique scene only copyrighted to jiu jitsu. Right,

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Speaker 1: but when you if you're going to do that on

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Speaker 1: the big screen nowadays, that costs is like a lot

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Speaker 1: of money to go into those kind of special efficial effects.

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Speaker 1: Ye jiu jitsu doesn't bother with that. Might Waite paid

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Speaker 1: Nicholas Cage where they could afford and go this. You

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Speaker 1: only get me for five minutes in total, so spread

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Speaker 1: it out just.

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Speaker 2: So you know, Nicholas Cage, the more money you take,

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Speaker 2: the less realistic the comet's going to look. So just

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Speaker 2: keep that in mind.

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Speaker 1: The comet right has got this crazy like tadpole tail

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Speaker 1: that looks like two pizzas, has thrown at a wall.

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Speaker 1: The comet is awful, and that's what I should have gone.

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Speaker 1: I'm out of this. Then there's a guy who's trying

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Speaker 1: to has been chased through a jungle, flaming ninja stars

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Speaker 1: and being thrown at him. He's wearing a cloak that

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Speaker 1: doesn't fit. Again here I'm thinking, why could they get

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Speaker 1: him a made to measure cloak. It's an ill fitting

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Speaker 1: cloak or I'm starting to get irritated by it. But

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Speaker 1: he's not fleeing these like these flames that he's jogging like.

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Speaker 1: He couldn't be wanted to run. They weren't paying enough.

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Speaker 1: Whoever this actor is, he's jogging through the jungle right.

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Speaker 1: Then he does that thing. Guess what he's found a

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Speaker 1: cliff face. I think this all feels really familiar. Throws it.

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Speaker 1: He's got no choice. He's got jumpers, and he looks

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Speaker 1: behind him and doesn't know what to do. As he's

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Speaker 1: jumping through the air, he falls in slow motion towards

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Speaker 1: and outstretches. That's the start the movie. It just gets worse.

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Speaker 2: So already before the title, living comes up about eleven cliches.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, then you see Nicholas Cage. He's he's he's dialed

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Speaker 1: in the crazy right. He's in a cave, like if

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Speaker 1: you've seen Apocalypse Now he's like that.

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Speaker 2: So they actually liked where this is going.

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Speaker 1: Now he's in a cave and they've abs he gone.

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Speaker 1: We haven't got a lot of money for Nicholas Cage's

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Speaker 1: wardrobeer cave. Just get him anything that's lying around. He's

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Speaker 1: wearing a pair of raybands in a cave and to

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Speaker 1: red headband to show us, Oh, he's proper grazy. It's

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Speaker 1: not any headband, it's a red headband and he's got

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Speaker 1: ray bands on in a darkened cave. Straight Away, his

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Speaker 1: first line of dialogue word forward is this, you look puzzled,

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Speaker 1: are you puzzled, I'd be puzzled right now and thinking

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Speaker 1: I'm done with this. I just turned it off. That

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Speaker 1: lot of shame. No, no shame on me. I brought

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Speaker 1: it twice, I rented out on iTunes and then forgot

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Speaker 1: about it and then wanted to watch it color, we said,

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Speaker 1: and had to rent it.

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Speaker 2: Again twenty four hours expire.

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Speaker 1: Yes, so I think I've chipped in about twenty bucks

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Speaker 1: to jiu jitsu. Just found a bit comment.

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Speaker 3: You're seeing the sky right now passes over the earth.

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Speaker 1: So anytime they tell you roughly the plot to the

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Speaker 1: movie and the trainer, I think it's called exp this

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Speaker 1: sn't you realize this is not a very good movie.

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Speaker 1: This is Nicholas Cage and one of his few lines

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Speaker 1: in it.

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Speaker 3: The cormet you're seeing the sky right now over the earth.

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Speaker 3: Every six years this quarrel order. When it's open, we

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Speaker 3: get a visitor from a distant galaxy. The poet warrior

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Speaker 3: in the sci fi sets.

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Speaker 1: So do you a poet warrior in a sci fi sense?

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Speaker 1: Who wrote that line? Didn't they look back at that

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Speaker 1: and think I can't change for this. We've got a

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Speaker 1: great answer that Nicholas ca You're doing it.

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Speaker 3: The cormet you're seeing the sky right now passes over.

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Speaker 3: There becauses of quarrel, but when it's open we get

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Speaker 3: a visitor from a distant galaxy. The poet Warrior in

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Speaker 3: the Sci fi sets.

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Speaker 2: No one else.

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Speaker 1: Speaking to him, and then you hear in the Spaceman

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Speaker 1: Poet Warrior says, no one else is talking to by

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Speaker 1: the way, in a word, Well, I was at to

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Speaker 1: actually swear. It's a crime. It's a crime, is what

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Speaker 1: that movie is. Christian O'Connell Show podcast