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Speaker 1: This is a podcast about failure with me. Lola Berry, author, nutritionist,

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Speaker 1: and yoga teacher join me as we get to know

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Speaker 1: these guests and learn about how their failures have ultimately

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Speaker 1: shaped their dreams.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to Fearlessly Failing with Lola Berry. Welcome back, Lola. Here.

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Speaker 1: This next guest, we'll have you in stitches. Olivia White

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Speaker 1: or House of White on Instar is a super mum

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Speaker 1: and she opens up about her not so perfect pregnancy

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Speaker 1: and her not so perfect giving birth experience. She talks

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Speaker 1: about the challenges of social media and copycats, and she's

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Speaker 1: also a bit of a goober like I am. She

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Speaker 1: loves Disneyland and the Lion King. So we cover a

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Speaker 1: lot of topics. I hope you get a huge laugh

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Speaker 1: and I hope you're smiling as you listen to this podcast.

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Speaker 1: Thank you so much, Live, you are a legend.

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Speaker 2: Oh I love hello.

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Speaker 1: So I am so so excited for you.

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Speaker 2: To meet the wonderful I call you Live, but the

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Speaker 2: wonderful Olivia. You're Olivia.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but everyone calls me Live.

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Speaker 4: Well when people call me Olivia, I'm like, they either

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Speaker 4: don't know me or don't like me.

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Speaker 1: Good, Okay, Okay, Well, I like you and I know you,

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Speaker 1: so I'll call you live well in my phone, your live.

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Speaker 2: House of White. I love it.

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Speaker 1: So for those of you that don't know Live, she's

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Speaker 1: one an incredible human being.

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Speaker 2: You can swear by the way we didn't touch me.

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Speaker 2: She's already dropped by. I was on a Lolaberry podcast

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Speaker 2: that there would be sweats. Yes, there's a lot of it.

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Speaker 2: You're so so welcome to.

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Speaker 1: All that I say is just be real, have fun,

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Speaker 1: and we are celebrating failures because I think that Instagram,

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Speaker 1: you know, not as much YouTube, but like especially in

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Speaker 1: Star it's like a highlight reel Facebook.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 1: It's all just the good shit that happens. No one

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Speaker 1: really talks about the tough stuff. And I think what

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Speaker 1: I love about you is you're such a young mama.

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Speaker 1: Bit you got two little bambino's, Yeah, Anambala a teddy.

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Speaker 1: So I guess when I first will not when I

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Speaker 1: first met you, but when we had first date, do

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Speaker 1: you remember, Yeah, it.

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Speaker 2: Was when you were launching your burgers.

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Speaker 1: The first time I met you was when you were Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but we had a date in Sids. Do you remember

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Speaker 1: we went to Bondie Whole Foods. Yes, and remember I'd

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Speaker 1: lost my phone.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, but you were just calm as a cucumber. Teddy

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Speaker 4: was tiny, teeny tiny, So me and ted were and Sydney.

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Speaker 4: She had a photo shoot for something, and we made

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Speaker 4: our way to bond Die.

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Speaker 2: So got a cab, have my phone in the cat

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Speaker 2: that's right, that's right.

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Speaker 4: And then I was early, so I had to go

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Speaker 4: find I went to a Vota phone and bought like

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Speaker 4: a cheapy phone, and then somehow got onto Jazz and

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Speaker 4: then I got jas to message you on Instagram to

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Speaker 4: tell you that I had lost my phone because I

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Speaker 4: didn't even know where.

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Speaker 3: We were meeting. We hadn't even like really made the

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Speaker 3: plan yet.

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Speaker 2: It was like, oh, textually want to get to Bonda.

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Speaker 2: We still made it, still made it work. We had

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Speaker 2: little wore treats together. I remember, amazing they weren't. That

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Speaker 2: was a good little day. That was a great So

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Speaker 2: that's my that would be I want to say, five

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Speaker 2: years ago.

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Speaker 4: Howld's Ted now four, Yeah, so it'd be about four

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Speaker 4: years ago now, so she's nearly turned four. So yeah,

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Speaker 4: but I but like we I think it was probably

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Speaker 4: a good six months before then. That we'd actually yeah,

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Speaker 4: the grilled night, Yeah that was good. So pregnant then

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Speaker 4: you were, and shit, I remember seeing it's got the

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Speaker 4: best hair, great lashes, all these amazing I'm looking at

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Speaker 4: you now, I'm like disheveled from yoga.

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Speaker 2: You look fucking great, knew, but thank you. And I

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Speaker 2: saw you.

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Speaker 1: Yesterday you were at a like fitness campaign thing and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, hot, damn girl, that bod.

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Speaker 4: I must admit that I was totally feeling myself in

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Speaker 4: that active way.

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Speaker 2: Hence all the stories and the twerking so good. I'm

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Speaker 2: all about a high waisted pant. Yeah, no, they were

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Speaker 2: really good. They were they were good high wasisty sucking an.

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Speaker 1: So for people that don't know you, you are a

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Speaker 1: very very busy talented Can I say you're like a mumpreneur?

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Speaker 2: Is that the word?

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Speaker 4: Yeah? I don't know.

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Speaker 2: I mean like labels these days, I guess, but I've

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Speaker 2: won awards for that, haven't you? Or been? Yeah, I'm

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Speaker 2: very kind of you to check that in there. One

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Speaker 2: thing that.

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Speaker 4: I'm not good at is like sitting and enjoying and

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Speaker 4: like celebrating like my own sort of so.

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Speaker 2: Get really awkward when people are like Oh you've done this.

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Speaker 2: I'm going to make it. I'm going to say all

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Speaker 2: these great things you've done, I know.

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Speaker 4: Because they're all just like for me, it's just like

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Speaker 4: I still sit there and be like, did that really happen?

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Speaker 2: Mate?

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Speaker 1: You travel to like Disneyland and like just live the dream.

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Speaker 2: That's what feels like.

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Speaker 1: And I'm like, I want to know, question, how many

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Speaker 1: pairs business class countus pjs do you own?

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Speaker 4: Well? Do you know what the funny thing is is

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Speaker 4: that most of them I have acquired through friends.

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Speaker 2: So with me, no, not even through friends. Through my

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Speaker 2: children on long haul flights yep.

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Speaker 4: So my kids just like know how to play it

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Speaker 4: on a plane, right, And then like halfway through a flight,

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Speaker 4: they'll be like, oh, your kids are so well behaved,

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Speaker 4: do you want them to come up to the flight

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Speaker 4: to here have some countos pajama. I'm like, I've literally

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Speaker 4: only flown business class twice and that was to and

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Speaker 4: from the last time I went to America with my

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Speaker 4: point Yes, so good, and and I scammed extra pairs.

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Speaker 2: You lucky bugger.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, afraid that's how I've got my most recent pair

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Speaker 1: of friend goes. I just scammed you these and they'd

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Speaker 1: ask for an extra pair.

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Speaker 4: Because you're in business, they'll give you whatever you want.

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Speaker 4: So you'll be like, they'll hand you a pair and

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Speaker 4: you'll be like, oh, you've given me the wrong size,

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Speaker 4: and they'll just give you another pair. And then you'd

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Speaker 4: be like, I get a pair of I'm like that

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Speaker 4: my husband. I just hand them out to my girlfriends.

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Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, so say the comfiest things at it.

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Speaker 1: I digress, though, You're amazing. So you've got a massive

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Speaker 1: instant following. You're constantly creating content, whether it be like

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Speaker 1: budging plans, saving plans.

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Speaker 2: You're all about.

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Speaker 1: I feel like your whole shtick is about helping other

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Speaker 1: young moms and kind of like helping sharing the way

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Speaker 1: in which you navigate being a young mom. Yeah, like

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Speaker 1: you're renovating your home like you're just a little go getter,

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Speaker 1: but you're like you're young, you're heart, you're.

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Speaker 2: Your a type personality.

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Speaker 4: Oh so atus, so you've always got something on the go. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: Like we've been here for twenty minutes just chatting about

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Speaker 4: like managers and all these other like, Yeah, you're helping

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Speaker 4: me al I'm just like like, we don't, I know,

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Speaker 4: we've got to start this podcast, but we don't. You're

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Speaker 4: a little go getter, and I think that from what

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Speaker 4: if people follow you on Instagram And if you don't,

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Speaker 4: please follow House of White because one entertainment factor two

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Speaker 4: dancing and wine, I'd say, is that current theme?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? I think I'm most known for the dancing and

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Speaker 2: the cat that is not mine and not sure else.

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Speaker 2: I love.

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Speaker 1: Your husband, Jaz. He's on like is it forty five?

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Speaker 1: He's drinking the kool aid right?

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Speaker 4: Oh? Mate, he has drunk the kool aid like he's

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Speaker 4: a part of the cult. And so now he doesn't

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Speaker 4: want to I saw a story he doesn't want to

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Speaker 4: eat bread, and you're like, well, I don't know that

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Speaker 4: I can be married to you anyone. Like I'm gonna

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Speaker 4: have to leave with the kids in the middle of

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Speaker 4: the night with the bread.

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Speaker 2: This is what I love.

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Speaker 1: Though you don't really go bang on about dieting or

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Speaker 1: anything like that. Obviously, I'm a nutritionist, so I totally

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Speaker 1: fall into patterns of dieting all the time.

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Speaker 2: In fact, I have a reasonably unhealthy habit every night.

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Speaker 1: If I get stressed out, I'll be like, oh, just diet,

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Speaker 1: like it's a coping mechanism, but you're just like I

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Speaker 1: love chicken nuggets.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and I love that about you.

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Speaker 1: Like, so, I think what I'm trying to say is

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Speaker 1: you're a very successful entrepreneur influencer as well, I would say,

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Speaker 1: as part of what you do or part of the

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Speaker 1: way in which you spread your message. Yeah, definitely, and

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Speaker 1: you're the real deal, which I love, which is why

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Speaker 1: we're here today. But this is a podcast about failing

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Speaker 1: or fucking up or feeling like you've fucked up. And

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Speaker 1: the reason why that's the theme is because I think

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Speaker 1: they're the lessons and then when we grow the most,

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Speaker 1: they're the times where we go.

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Speaker 2: Oh, actually I'm stronger than I thought I was. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: hands down.

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Speaker 1: So when you texted me some ideas about what you

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Speaker 1: becomfy talking about with failing, the first one I was

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Speaker 1: like fuck because I met you already a mama bear,

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Speaker 1: I didn't get to see what you went through with

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Speaker 1: pregnancy post that first berth.

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Speaker 2: Like go for it.

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Speaker 4: Share Well, I guess for me like that was probably

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Speaker 4: the like you said, being a young mum, And it

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Speaker 4: took me a really long time to realize that I

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Speaker 4: was a young mum because I'm thirty now and I

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Speaker 4: have an almost six year old is my eldest, and most.

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Speaker 3: Of my friends still don't have babies.

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Speaker 4: Yes, so I'm older that And I guess because I

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Speaker 4: measured it based on the time that i'd been with Jazz.

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Speaker 4: We've been together since if fifteen, that by the time

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Speaker 4: we had babies, it had been.

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Speaker 2: Like eight years for us. But I was still very young.

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Speaker 4: I had no friends that had babies, never held a baby,

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Speaker 4: I never baby sat when I was younger, I literally

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Speaker 4: didn't know what the fuck to do with one. So

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Speaker 4: even you know, falling pregnant and going through pregnancy, like

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Speaker 4: I just had no idea and I fucking hated it,

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Speaker 4: like it was awful, and you kind of it came

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Speaker 4: so unexpected because now, in the age of social media,

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Speaker 4: like six years old, I feel like it's a really

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Speaker 4: common theme. You know, there's heaps of people in my space,

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Speaker 4: you know, sharing their stories and all that kind of stuff.

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Speaker 4: But at that time, there was really nothing unless you

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Speaker 4: you know, you went into Google forums and you know,

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Speaker 4: went down that rabbit hole, but there really wasn't anything

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Speaker 4: openly accessible.

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Speaker 1: And I think people think, oh, you're pregnant, what a gift,

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Speaker 1: And it is on one side. But I remember when

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Speaker 1: I made yoga prenatal training, they were like, the first

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Speaker 1: thing they said is a lot of women hate being

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Speaker 1: pregnant and they feel.

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Speaker 2: Like there's an alien inside them.

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Speaker 1: They out they're getting fat, they feel like they're losing

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Speaker 1: who they are as a human being.

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Speaker 4: Absolutely, And for me being like I mean, obviously, Jess

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Speaker 4: and I had been together for a really long time.

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Speaker 4: We'd just gotten married about six months before we bought

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Speaker 4: this house. I had been made redundant from a job,

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Speaker 4: so I was in a new job, so I just started.

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Speaker 3: A new role. And all of.

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Speaker 4: Because Jess is older than me, all his friends were

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Speaker 4: getting married and starting.

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Speaker 2: To have babies. So we sort of thought that was

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Speaker 2: like the next.

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Speaker 4: Thing, but we didn't really actually think about it. We

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Speaker 4: just thought, oh, yeah, you know, we'll have kids in

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Speaker 4: the next couple of years, thinking that like it would

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Speaker 4: take a long time, and then it didn't, and then

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Speaker 4: we were like fuck, like and we just bought this house.

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Speaker 2: It was a huge like what.

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Speaker 3: The fuck moment because you know, I.

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Speaker 4: Had a new job, like we didn't really have jest

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Speaker 4: old hear I was twenty three when I was yeah,

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Speaker 4: so like my young, young yes, that's young young still,

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Speaker 4: like I hadn't finished UNI because I was like one

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Speaker 4: of those yo yo Uni people, like I would be like,

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Speaker 4: start course and then start a different courts.

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Speaker 2: What did you start?

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Speaker 4: So originally I did primary education and then I realized

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Speaker 4: I fucking hate other people's kids then, so then that

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Speaker 4: was like a big no no. And then I started

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Speaker 4: doing marketing, so I did like a tape course that

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Speaker 4: ran into a unicorse and then I moved here, so

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Speaker 4: I changed unis and then I changed my major and

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Speaker 4: like because I was working and that was more important

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Speaker 4: to me because I wanted money, and yeah, I just

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Speaker 4: like never got around to finishing. But at the end

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Speaker 4: of the day, like really, it's one of those things.

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Speaker 4: It's like fucking no one cares about what piece of

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Speaker 4: paper you've got to do the job.

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Speaker 1: It's so good to hear that though, because I think

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Speaker 1: a lot of people and even some there is still

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Speaker 1: that like finish school, go to UNI, get the career,

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Speaker 1: make the money, like there's that whole way.

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Speaker 4: But the one thing that I have found, the one

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Speaker 4: thing I learned from that and a lot of things

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Speaker 4: I've done in my life, is that I.

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Speaker 2: Never really knew what I wanted to do, so it's

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Speaker 2: been trial and.

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Speaker 3: Error for me.

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Speaker 2: I like that though. I think it is just everyone.

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Speaker 4: Try something and if it works, it works, and if

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Speaker 4: it doesn't, it doesn't. And then you can be like, right,

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Speaker 4: that's not for me to move on to the next thing.

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Speaker 4: Like is it like a feeling you get if it's

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Speaker 4: not working, like oh this feels a bit not right. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: Or you have an expectation it's going to be one thing,

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Speaker 4: and then you start Like when I did primary education,

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Speaker 4: I was like, oh, this is not what I thought of.

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Speaker 4: This is not our my prep like yeah yeah, and

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Speaker 4: then obviously like going back to like you know, falling

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Speaker 4: pregnant and stuff like that.

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Speaker 2: I guess it was one of those trial and everythings,

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Speaker 2: but you can't really fucking back out of it. This

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Speaker 2: is true. This is true. So you know it's like, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 2: you know, we get.

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Speaker 4: Married and we're like, oh, yeah, that didn't change shit,

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Speaker 4: Like getting married means fuck all, let's be honest, like yeah,

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Speaker 4: you know, And we ended up having we got married

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Speaker 4: in our engagement.

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Speaker 2: Party as a surprise because love.

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Speaker 4: When I started planning a wedding, I was like I

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Speaker 4: would compare how much shit cost to the equivalent of

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Speaker 4: the holiday you could get for that amount of money. So,

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Speaker 4: because I love to travel and it's like one of

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Speaker 4: my passions, like I absolutely love it, I'd be like like, Okay,

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Speaker 4: the cars are going to cost us two thousand dollars

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Speaker 4: like the Limos or whatever.

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Speaker 3: And I was like I could fucking get to Thailand

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Speaker 3: for that or like.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, you know, And I'm like to myself, I'm like,

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Speaker 4: I have to pay how much money for other people

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Speaker 4: to come and.

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Speaker 3: Eat at my event? Do you know what I mean?

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Speaker 2: To me?

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Speaker 4: It like just it wasn't for me that whole show.

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Speaker 4: It just felt like it was for other people. So

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Speaker 4: when the end its where fuck it? I want to

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Speaker 4: do it, Like that's not what it means to me.

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Speaker 4: And yeah, So we got married at our engagement party.

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Speaker 4: It was the best thing we ever did. I spent

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Speaker 4: more at my thirtieth birthday party than I did at my.

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Speaker 2: Engagement because you know, it was it wasn't for me.

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Speaker 4: All that stuff, the celebration, yes, and they having our

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Speaker 4: friends there with us, yes, but the money in the

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Speaker 4: show is no.

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Speaker 3: And then of course then we felt pregnant.

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Speaker 4: And it just wasn't what I expected. I put on

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Speaker 4: a fuck ton of weight with Annabelle. Yeah, nearly thirty

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Speaker 4: two kilos, which is a lot when you only weigh

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Speaker 4: fifty eight years start.

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Speaker 3: With yeah, I've always had.

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Speaker 2: I don't for like half a another human adult human being.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, And you know, everyone tells you all the beautiful

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Speaker 4: sides of it, and you're just like, you know, hairy

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Speaker 4: and sweaty and smelly, and like you just like what

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Speaker 4: the fuck. And I worked in a bank at the time,

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Speaker 4: in a customer facing role, and for some reason, when

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Speaker 4: you work in a role like that and you obviously

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Speaker 4: like you see how much money people have and all

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Speaker 4: that kind of stuff, they think that it means that

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Speaker 4: they can just unload and tell you everything about their life.

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Speaker 1: So I just.

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Speaker 4: Couldn't deal with people like I couldn't deal with being

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Speaker 4: in a customer facing role and pretending like I gave

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Speaker 4: a fuck because I just didn't be there.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: I was, you know, I was fat, I was grumpy,

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Speaker 4: I was hungry, I was smelling, I was sweaty, all

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Speaker 4: of those things.

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Speaker 2: Did you get cravings?

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Speaker 4: Not really, not to the extent that some people talk about,

338
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Speaker 4: like I just have to eat like this, Like I

339
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Speaker 4: had a friend that just had to have pink yogos

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Speaker 4: all the time.

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Speaker 2: Pink yogas. What a pink yoga?

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Speaker 4: You know, like the like the yogosddings. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

343
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Speaker 4: actually had to have the pin all the time.

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Speaker 2: It don't even make them anymore. And I'm like, on

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Speaker 2: my go I imagined it like my mom was pickles,

346
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Speaker 2: you know, like gurg A.

347
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Speaker 3: Lot of people it's a salt.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, Usually your cravings are tied to something that you're

349
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Speaker 4: actually needing in your pain.

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Speaker 3: Stuff like that apparently.

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Speaker 4: And then yeah, just like I stopped work at like

352
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Speaker 4: thirty weeks because I just couldn't deal with it anymore.

353
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Speaker 4: And then going into like birth and everything like that,

354
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Speaker 4: I think I knew, like I had this inkling in

355
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Speaker 4: my mind that it was not going to I didn't

356
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Speaker 4: have a plan, which was probably good, but it wasn't

357
00:15:33,360 --> 00:15:36,920
Speaker 4: going to be textbook. I always carried really high. I

358
00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:39,120
Speaker 4: never had that pressure on my bladder and stuff like that.

359
00:15:39,160 --> 00:15:41,160
Speaker 4: Some women talk about like constantly needing to pain, and

360
00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:44,720
Speaker 4: it was because she never engaged. So technically, like there's

361
00:15:44,800 --> 00:15:49,280
Speaker 4: the whole sort of engaged there, like she loving this

362
00:15:49,280 --> 00:15:59,520
Speaker 4: this visual demonstration you're giving me, amazing, amazing, and on

363
00:15:59,560 --> 00:16:02,080
Speaker 4: my dude date, they were like, we're going to induce

364
00:16:02,120 --> 00:16:04,400
Speaker 4: you because I was starting to get like a rashal

365
00:16:04,400 --> 00:16:06,520
Speaker 4: over my body. It's called pups, and it was like

366
00:16:06,520 --> 00:16:09,320
Speaker 4: this hot rashal over my body. And they're like, all right,

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00:16:09,320 --> 00:16:11,040
Speaker 4: we're going to have to induce you. Like that's sort

368
00:16:11,040 --> 00:16:14,080
Speaker 4: of like an overproduction of the hormones causing that when

369
00:16:14,080 --> 00:16:16,359
Speaker 4: in on the Friday night they gave me the gel.

370
00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:20,120
Speaker 4: By Saturday, I was getting a few contractions, but not much.

371
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Speaker 4: And then by the Sunday I'd had like three lots

372
00:16:23,240 --> 00:16:25,040
Speaker 4: of this gel. So I've technically been in sort of

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Speaker 4: like the first stages of labor for nearly three days.

374
00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:31,720
Speaker 4: I'm getting contractions, but I've only dilated to like three centimeters.

375
00:16:31,760 --> 00:16:35,480
Speaker 4: So it's like e sleeping because when you're in a hospital,

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00:16:35,480 --> 00:16:38,080
Speaker 4: you're attached to machines, there's beeping, there's bonging, there's people

377
00:16:38,160 --> 00:16:38,720
Speaker 4: checking on you.

378
00:16:38,800 --> 00:16:40,920
Speaker 2: I've got a monitor around me because when you get.

379
00:16:40,840 --> 00:16:43,480
Speaker 4: Induced, you've got to have that thing. Yeah, so I'm

380
00:16:43,480 --> 00:16:46,120
Speaker 4: not sleeping or anything. I've smashed like three hundred levels

381
00:16:46,120 --> 00:16:48,720
Speaker 4: of candy crush. Like then they're like, all right, we're

382
00:16:48,720 --> 00:16:50,600
Speaker 4: going to put the drip in and usually when you

383
00:16:50,640 --> 00:16:53,160
Speaker 4: get the drip, it's a matter of in ites, do you.

384
00:16:53,200 --> 00:16:55,760
Speaker 2: Know what I mean? Like before it's really intense. Yeah.

385
00:16:55,800 --> 00:16:59,600
Speaker 4: Anyway, they put the epidural in, they give me the drip,

386
00:16:59,720 --> 00:17:01,800
Speaker 4: and ten hours later, I'm still going. So I'm getting

387
00:17:01,840 --> 00:17:05,280
Speaker 4: fully intense contractions and I'm just not getting anywhere.

388
00:17:05,280 --> 00:17:08,520
Speaker 1: And random side question to the epidural really hurt. I've

389
00:17:08,560 --> 00:17:10,679
Speaker 1: heard that's or is it just like.

390
00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:13,120
Speaker 4: By that stage you like get It depends, So there's

391
00:17:13,119 --> 00:17:16,480
Speaker 4: difference between epidural and the spinal epidurals when they put

392
00:17:16,480 --> 00:17:19,280
Speaker 4: it in and it stays in and it's continually administered

393
00:17:19,280 --> 00:17:21,479
Speaker 4: to you. That's what I had, and I had a

394
00:17:21,480 --> 00:17:25,280
Speaker 4: really good anethetist, So you got it first time. A

395
00:17:25,280 --> 00:17:26,879
Speaker 4: lot of people that don't get it first time.

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Speaker 3: You can paint and it's fucked.

397
00:17:28,600 --> 00:17:30,760
Speaker 2: Yeah. With a spinal yeah, because.

398
00:17:30,520 --> 00:17:33,560
Speaker 4: That's like a giant needle that goes in between your vertebrate,

399
00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:36,480
Speaker 4: between you vertebrate, you fucking feel that one. If I

400
00:17:36,560 --> 00:17:38,399
Speaker 4: think about it, I can still feel it to this

401
00:17:38,480 --> 00:17:39,520
Speaker 4: day and it makes me cringe.

402
00:17:39,720 --> 00:17:41,200
Speaker 2: So you have had one the other way as well.

403
00:17:41,240 --> 00:17:43,960
Speaker 3: With Teddy, I had a spinal yeah, so that that's

404
00:17:43,960 --> 00:17:44,480
Speaker 3: fucked up.

405
00:17:45,240 --> 00:17:45,800
Speaker 2: That scares me.

406
00:17:45,960 --> 00:17:50,840
Speaker 4: The e's fine, And because subsequently, in the end I

407
00:17:50,880 --> 00:17:54,240
Speaker 4: got rushed in for emergency caesarean. They didn't have time

408
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:56,159
Speaker 4: to do a spinal so they to just top up

409
00:17:56,160 --> 00:17:56,800
Speaker 4: your epidural.

410
00:17:57,080 --> 00:17:58,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, so there's a difference.

411
00:17:59,040 --> 00:18:00,840
Speaker 2: We're talking about anabel here. Yeah, yeah, Okay.

412
00:18:00,920 --> 00:18:03,760
Speaker 4: So by this stage, I'm fifty six hours into labor,

413
00:18:04,359 --> 00:18:07,000
Speaker 4: her heart rate starts to drop.

414
00:18:07,080 --> 00:18:09,040
Speaker 2: It just all happens very quickly.

415
00:18:09,080 --> 00:18:11,800
Speaker 4: But in that three day lead, right, they just let

416
00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:16,159
Speaker 4: me fucking labor, knowing I wasn't progressing, not talking to

417
00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:19,000
Speaker 4: me about my options, not feeling like I had options,

418
00:18:19,040 --> 00:18:21,840
Speaker 4: like and because I'm so young and I didn't know,

419
00:18:21,880 --> 00:18:23,600
Speaker 4: and I didn't you know, I'm in a public hospital,

420
00:18:25,440 --> 00:18:27,560
Speaker 4: Like all that control was taken away from me.

421
00:18:27,720 --> 00:18:30,120
Speaker 3: And I think that, you know.

422
00:18:30,080 --> 00:18:32,440
Speaker 2: That's quite scary, Like that's building.

423
00:18:32,119 --> 00:18:35,200
Speaker 3: Fear absolutely, And then to be told.

424
00:18:35,080 --> 00:18:39,320
Speaker 4: All right at midnight, like you just whisked into surgical.

425
00:18:39,840 --> 00:18:42,560
Speaker 4: I'm so tired by this stage. I vomited on the

426
00:18:42,600 --> 00:18:44,800
Speaker 4: table because like they're obviously topping.

427
00:18:44,640 --> 00:18:46,800
Speaker 3: Up my aper, durl, they couldn't.

428
00:18:46,800 --> 00:18:49,080
Speaker 4: So like when they cut me open, she was stuck

429
00:18:49,359 --> 00:18:51,680
Speaker 4: because I'd been laboring for so long, but she didn't

430
00:18:51,680 --> 00:18:54,119
Speaker 4: actually fit. She sort of got into this contorted space,

431
00:18:54,160 --> 00:18:57,120
Speaker 4: so like I had someone at the top here pushing

432
00:18:57,200 --> 00:19:00,199
Speaker 4: down to try and get around, so like she was

433
00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:03,199
Speaker 4: fully stuck and she started actually screaming before they got

434
00:19:03,200 --> 00:19:05,719
Speaker 4: her out because they just can get her out, and

435
00:19:05,760 --> 00:19:08,600
Speaker 4: so I've got people pushing as people running around.

436
00:19:08,640 --> 00:19:11,959
Speaker 3: No one's telling me anything, Like Jez just looks.

437
00:19:11,440 --> 00:19:15,480
Speaker 1: Like, oh, yeah, it'd be mortifying. I reckon be almost

438
00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:17,600
Speaker 1: more mortifying for the husband having to see that.

439
00:19:17,960 --> 00:19:22,240
Speaker 4: Yeah, and like obviously like when you have the sheet

440
00:19:22,320 --> 00:19:24,280
Speaker 4: up and stuff and he's like, I made the mistake

441
00:19:24,320 --> 00:19:26,320
Speaker 4: of looking at it because they technically have to pull

442
00:19:26,440 --> 00:19:28,360
Speaker 4: organs out of the way, yeah, to get in there.

443
00:19:28,400 --> 00:19:30,919
Speaker 4: So like you've got organs like sitting out around like

444
00:19:30,960 --> 00:19:33,280
Speaker 4: while they try and get this baby out. And then

445
00:19:33,400 --> 00:19:35,840
Speaker 4: once they sort of got her out, I just passed

446
00:19:35,880 --> 00:19:40,600
Speaker 4: out because I'm going to wait for like three and

447
00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:42,760
Speaker 4: I didn't really get to hold her. I didn't really

448
00:19:42,760 --> 00:19:44,520
Speaker 4: get to spend time with her and have that sort

449
00:19:44,520 --> 00:19:47,160
Speaker 4: of moment where you know they latch and you get

450
00:19:47,200 --> 00:19:49,800
Speaker 4: to because it's the middle of the night. I'll send

451
00:19:49,840 --> 00:19:53,760
Speaker 4: you a photo actually that they took of us just

452
00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:55,720
Speaker 4: sort of like moments after we had her, and both

453
00:19:55,720 --> 00:19:59,719
Speaker 4: of us look dead, like I don't even look recognizable

454
00:19:59,720 --> 00:20:02,280
Speaker 4: because so puffy, because I've just like I've literally been

455
00:20:02,359 --> 00:20:04,000
Speaker 4: laboring and had shit pumped into me.

456
00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:05,560
Speaker 2: For full Oh my goodness.

457
00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:10,320
Speaker 4: And then I think that that whole experience and what

458
00:20:10,400 --> 00:20:16,080
Speaker 4: came after that, like I never really realized I guess

459
00:20:16,080 --> 00:20:20,000
Speaker 4: how much it affected me until recently. Annabel started school

460
00:20:20,040 --> 00:20:22,600
Speaker 4: this year and I really fucking struggled, really struggled to.

461
00:20:22,600 --> 00:20:25,800
Speaker 3: The way, crying in the car. I didn't want to going.

462
00:20:25,840 --> 00:20:28,440
Speaker 4: It's such a huge chunk of time and it hit

463
00:20:28,480 --> 00:20:30,680
Speaker 4: me out of nowhere. And the start of this year

464
00:20:30,720 --> 00:20:34,600
Speaker 4: was really fucking tough for me one because of that,

465
00:20:34,680 --> 00:20:38,119
Speaker 4: and too, my satin return happened this year. Oh yeah, girl,

466
00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:40,159
Speaker 4: so I can talk to you about that till the

467
00:20:40,160 --> 00:20:42,439
Speaker 4: cows come home. So yeah, anyone who knows about that

468
00:20:42,520 --> 00:20:44,080
Speaker 4: knows that there's been a fucked up year for me.

469
00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:46,879
Speaker 2: Very a lot to learn this year. But I started

470
00:20:46,880 --> 00:20:50,960
Speaker 2: seeing psychologists this year, and oh, I don't know what.

471
00:20:51,080 --> 00:20:53,359
Speaker 4: Was causing my anxiety or this attachment issue, and just

472
00:20:53,440 --> 00:20:56,520
Speaker 4: all of a sudden, one session, she's pulling all this

473
00:20:56,560 --> 00:20:58,560
Speaker 4: stuff out of me and we sort of really got

474
00:20:58,560 --> 00:21:00,679
Speaker 4: back to It comes back to that whole birth trauma

475
00:21:00,760 --> 00:21:03,680
Speaker 4: and that experience I had with her of feeling out

476
00:21:03,680 --> 00:21:04,920
Speaker 4: of control and feeling.

477
00:21:04,640 --> 00:21:06,359
Speaker 3: Like she was taken from me against my will.

478
00:21:06,560 --> 00:21:10,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, and you didn't get that first mum Bubba oxytocin bond.

479
00:21:10,760 --> 00:21:13,080
Speaker 4: It was taken away from me. I never had any

480
00:21:13,119 --> 00:21:15,280
Speaker 4: say or any control over it. And that's how her

481
00:21:15,320 --> 00:21:17,840
Speaker 4: going to school feels to me, Yeah, because it's like

482
00:21:18,040 --> 00:21:19,520
Speaker 4: she's in someone else's care.

483
00:21:19,640 --> 00:21:20,760
Speaker 2: She's like.

484
00:21:21,440 --> 00:21:23,200
Speaker 3: The whole school thing kind of gets me a bit.

485
00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:25,480
Speaker 4: I'm like, I understand why people homeschool because it's like

486
00:21:25,520 --> 00:21:26,840
Speaker 4: you got to have them there at a certain time,

487
00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:28,040
Speaker 4: you got to pick them up a certain time.

488
00:21:28,080 --> 00:21:30,560
Speaker 3: They got to they have to learn militant.

489
00:21:30,680 --> 00:21:32,400
Speaker 2: It's a very yes, and I.

490
00:21:32,359 --> 00:21:34,640
Speaker 3: Never thought i'd be that parent, But it.

491
00:21:34,600 --> 00:21:37,920
Speaker 4: All comes back to that birth trauma and those first

492
00:21:37,920 --> 00:21:41,920
Speaker 4: few days because obviously having a Caesar, you supposed to

493
00:21:41,920 --> 00:21:43,440
Speaker 4: stay in hospital for a bit of time, and because

494
00:21:43,440 --> 00:21:45,800
Speaker 4: it was an emergency, like they had to like I've

495
00:21:45,800 --> 00:21:48,159
Speaker 4: got a scar probably four or five times bigger than

496
00:21:48,200 --> 00:21:49,919
Speaker 4: what normal people have because she got stuck and they

497
00:21:49,920 --> 00:21:54,159
Speaker 4: had to cut pretty much hip to hip. I remember

498
00:21:54,160 --> 00:21:57,560
Speaker 4: on the second day, they're like, you need to rest,

499
00:21:57,800 --> 00:21:59,200
Speaker 4: and I was like, I just want to hold her,

500
00:21:59,200 --> 00:22:00,240
Speaker 4: like I just want to have a sh was in

501
00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:02,240
Speaker 4: the nursery and they're like, no, you need to rest,

502
00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:04,800
Speaker 4: and like I got like I reckon. It was like

503
00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:07,679
Speaker 4: a psychotic episode basically, and they ended up sedating me.

504
00:22:08,320 --> 00:22:11,399
Speaker 2: Oh my god, that's like the worst story ever.

505
00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:13,159
Speaker 3: It was like being in a was.

506
00:22:13,280 --> 00:22:14,960
Speaker 4: I was treated like I was in a psych word,

507
00:22:15,359 --> 00:22:17,760
Speaker 4: and they like, I know it was because obviously, like

508
00:22:18,119 --> 00:22:22,120
Speaker 4: I was recovering from like a really traumatic experience. Yeah,

509
00:22:22,160 --> 00:22:24,840
Speaker 4: and it's major surgery, and.

510
00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:26,359
Speaker 2: I think that's what people forget.

511
00:22:26,520 --> 00:22:27,400
Speaker 3: And you know what, I had.

512
00:22:27,359 --> 00:22:30,080
Speaker 4: Actually forgotten this happened until I talked to my psychologist.

513
00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:33,920
Speaker 4: So I very really like would really talk to people

514
00:22:33,920 --> 00:22:36,200
Speaker 4: in depth about my birth experience. I'd be like, oh, yeah,

515
00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:38,000
Speaker 4: you know, I was in labor for this long and

516
00:22:38,040 --> 00:22:40,400
Speaker 4: then it ended up in thing, and I'd actually forgotten

517
00:22:40,480 --> 00:22:44,280
Speaker 4: that the next day that I'd basically had this psychotic

518
00:22:44,320 --> 00:22:46,320
Speaker 4: episode where I was going psycho at.

519
00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:47,639
Speaker 3: The nurses and I'm like I just want her.

520
00:22:47,680 --> 00:22:48,399
Speaker 2: I just want to hold her.

521
00:22:48,440 --> 00:22:49,760
Speaker 4: I just want to have her, and blah blah blah,

522
00:22:49,760 --> 00:22:51,040
Speaker 4: and I was like, I just want to fucking leave,

523
00:22:51,119 --> 00:22:52,960
Speaker 4: Let me leave, and they sedated me.

524
00:22:53,520 --> 00:22:58,719
Speaker 1: Also understandably though, like any think about like you're a mom, Yeah,

525
00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:01,560
Speaker 1: like our injury zick value is to look after the

526
00:23:01,640 --> 00:23:05,679
Speaker 1: humans we create. So like, yes, you were having like

527
00:23:05,920 --> 00:23:10,520
Speaker 1: an an emotionive kind of reaction, but so you should

528
00:23:10,520 --> 00:23:13,320
Speaker 1: have been. Your fucking baby was taken from you, or

529
00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:15,440
Speaker 1: at least that's what you felt and probably thought.

530
00:23:15,440 --> 00:23:16,560
Speaker 3: That's and that's exactly it.

531
00:23:16,640 --> 00:23:19,480
Speaker 4: And then, of course we had a really turbulent time

532
00:23:19,520 --> 00:23:21,879
Speaker 4: with breastfeeding, and I do I do think that was

533
00:23:21,920 --> 00:23:25,400
Speaker 4: because I didn't really get those first few days with her,

534
00:23:25,520 --> 00:23:27,280
Speaker 4: and I ended up leaving early.

535
00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:30,639
Speaker 3: I left after the second day, so I had her

536
00:23:30,680 --> 00:23:31,040
Speaker 3: on the.

537
00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:33,679
Speaker 4: Like I guess, the Monday morning at like one am,

538
00:23:33,720 --> 00:23:36,680
Speaker 4: and I left the Tuesday afternoon, No, the Wednesday afternoon.

539
00:23:36,720 --> 00:23:39,840
Speaker 2: Sorry, I was just like, get me the fuger out

540
00:23:39,840 --> 00:23:40,040
Speaker 2: of here.

541
00:23:40,119 --> 00:23:42,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, But then I didn't have any visitors nearly two

542
00:23:42,400 --> 00:23:45,959
Speaker 4: weeks because I didn't know what the fuck I was doing, like,

543
00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:48,760
Speaker 4: and I was trying to you know, you know, this

544
00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:52,920
Speaker 4: new person and me who's effectively a new person, and

545
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:55,480
Speaker 4: all this shit I'm recovering from major surgery and that

546
00:23:55,520 --> 00:23:58,359
Speaker 4: traumatic experience. I'm trying to breastfeed. I just felt so

547
00:23:58,440 --> 00:24:00,280
Speaker 4: out of control and so anxious.

548
00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:01,040
Speaker 2: But I couldn't.

549
00:24:01,280 --> 00:24:03,080
Speaker 4: I didn't have the energy to fake it to anyone.

550
00:24:03,600 --> 00:24:05,520
Speaker 4: Like if someone rocked up, if you'd come over, like

551
00:24:05,640 --> 00:24:07,199
Speaker 4: you know, the next day, I'd have just been like,

552
00:24:07,480 --> 00:24:08,240
Speaker 4: this is fine.

553
00:24:08,640 --> 00:24:10,679
Speaker 1: Oh, but I don't think you're alone in that, Like

554
00:24:10,760 --> 00:24:12,479
Speaker 1: I know, and I think it, but I didn't know

555
00:24:12,560 --> 00:24:14,919
Speaker 1: that at the time because you and he's so little,

556
00:24:15,040 --> 00:24:18,360
Speaker 1: Like I'm thirty three, this happened for you ten years ago.

557
00:24:18,400 --> 00:24:21,040
Speaker 1: The person I was at twenty three, Yeah, I had

558
00:24:21,040 --> 00:24:23,000
Speaker 1: a massive eating disorder. There's no way I could have

559
00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:25,200
Speaker 1: thought about bringing other human being into the world.

560
00:24:25,400 --> 00:24:28,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, and I definitely I think back to myself as

561
00:24:28,359 --> 00:24:30,920
Speaker 4: a person at twenty three. I was still finding myself.

562
00:24:31,200 --> 00:24:33,600
Speaker 4: I was still trial and erroring a lot of shit.

563
00:24:33,840 --> 00:24:35,080
Speaker 3: Yeah.

564
00:24:35,119 --> 00:24:39,399
Speaker 4: And you know, you have this idea, this whole I

565
00:24:39,440 --> 00:24:42,720
Speaker 4: guess myth that is created around motherhood and how it's

566
00:24:42,720 --> 00:24:44,359
Speaker 4: meant to be and how you're supposed to enjoy it,

567
00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:46,520
Speaker 4: and you know, the highlight reel luck you talk about.

568
00:24:47,720 --> 00:24:50,520
Speaker 4: It took me a good fucking two three years to

569
00:24:50,920 --> 00:24:51,840
Speaker 4: even settle into it.

570
00:24:51,880 --> 00:24:53,200
Speaker 3: I think, in.

571
00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:56,879
Speaker 1: All honesty, two things I want to ask you. First

572
00:24:56,920 --> 00:24:59,320
Speaker 1: of all, thanks for being really open about having a therapist,

573
00:24:59,400 --> 00:25:02,719
Speaker 1: because I'm very passionate and I know you know, passionate

574
00:25:02,720 --> 00:25:03,800
Speaker 1: about a therapist.

575
00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:05,200
Speaker 2: I think it's game changer.

576
00:25:05,400 --> 00:25:08,560
Speaker 4: Yeah, the fact that you can even know that that

577
00:25:08,640 --> 00:25:11,159
Speaker 4: was such a traumatic experience and it's no idea have

578
00:25:11,160 --> 00:25:13,159
Speaker 4: had an effect, But it's so good that you've had

579
00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:18,800
Speaker 4: someone to unpack that withs. That has taken me to yeah,

580
00:25:19,040 --> 00:25:21,280
Speaker 4: to talk to someone about to realize that it was

581
00:25:21,280 --> 00:25:24,800
Speaker 4: a thing, to acknowledge that, you know, it doesn't matter

582
00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:28,919
Speaker 4: how your birth goes. You know, it's an individual experience.

583
00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:29,760
Speaker 3: And I think that.

584
00:25:29,960 --> 00:25:33,240
Speaker 4: I while I acknowledged that yes I definitely had pre

585
00:25:33,320 --> 00:25:37,560
Speaker 4: impost natal anxiety and depression, I never realized where it

586
00:25:37,640 --> 00:25:41,119
Speaker 4: stemmed from. I never realized like when I had Teddy,

587
00:25:41,480 --> 00:25:44,160
Speaker 4: I was like, I'm fucking having a plan, Caesar, and

588
00:25:44,240 --> 00:25:47,000
Speaker 4: I was just like I'm taking control, Like I knew

589
00:25:47,000 --> 00:25:49,320
Speaker 4: that much. And I had an obstitution that was very

590
00:25:49,320 --> 00:25:51,360
Speaker 4: fucking pushy. She's like, you know, you can have a feedback,

591
00:25:51,400 --> 00:25:53,879
Speaker 4: and I'm like, I will fucking find a new obstitution

592
00:25:54,560 --> 00:25:57,280
Speaker 4: just cut me open and take her out. And because

593
00:25:57,280 --> 00:25:59,600
Speaker 4: it was the obstrution I had with Annabel had retired

594
00:25:59,600 --> 00:26:01,600
Speaker 4: by this, she just was a new one. And I

595
00:26:01,720 --> 00:26:04,679
Speaker 4: just remember that when I finally had Teddy and I

596
00:26:04,720 --> 00:26:07,920
Speaker 4: had the planned Caesar so much better, by the way,

597
00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:10,480
Speaker 4: like the difference between an emergency season and a planned Caesar.

598
00:26:10,560 --> 00:26:12,760
Speaker 4: It was a fucking breeze, Like I recovered like that.

599
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:17,080
Speaker 4: She was like, oh, yeah, no, she wasn't gonna fit.

600
00:26:17,119 --> 00:26:18,919
Speaker 4: And I'm like, fucking listen to me, bitch.

601
00:26:18,760 --> 00:26:20,880
Speaker 2: Like yeah, really, you're right.

602
00:26:21,080 --> 00:26:22,679
Speaker 3: Yeah, I was right, like I was gonna end up

603
00:26:22,720 --> 00:26:23,600
Speaker 3: with a Caesar anyway.

604
00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:26,000
Speaker 1: But you're a very small human to it, Like that's

605
00:26:26,000 --> 00:26:29,119
Speaker 1: the other thing we forget that, like on a physiological level,

606
00:26:29,240 --> 00:26:30,000
Speaker 1: are your hips right?

607
00:26:30,080 --> 00:26:32,159
Speaker 2: Is your pelvis right? Like they literally they.

608
00:26:32,040 --> 00:26:35,119
Speaker 4: Said they're like they just didn't didn't shift, Like there

609
00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:35,960
Speaker 4: was just literally.

610
00:26:35,720 --> 00:26:37,720
Speaker 2: Not It doesn't matter how big or small your babies are.

611
00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:40,040
Speaker 4: And with Teddy, it's funny because I talked to my

612
00:26:40,080 --> 00:26:41,760
Speaker 4: therapists about she says, oh, you know, and how are

613
00:26:41,760 --> 00:26:43,080
Speaker 4: you with your second birthday daughter?

614
00:26:43,440 --> 00:26:44,400
Speaker 3: And I said, oh, Teddy's fine.

615
00:26:44,480 --> 00:26:46,600
Speaker 4: Eddy can fucking look after herself, Like I've never got

616
00:26:46,600 --> 00:26:49,000
Speaker 4: a but it's with Annabelle. I've got that because of

617
00:26:49,080 --> 00:26:52,359
Speaker 4: that that birth experience. And yeah, like I'm still I

618
00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:54,680
Speaker 4: still see my psychologists now, like I pretty much see

619
00:26:54,720 --> 00:26:59,480
Speaker 4: you're on a regular basis, even if it's not situational yet.

620
00:27:00,040 --> 00:27:01,840
Speaker 4: I remember coming to one of your events and you

621
00:27:01,880 --> 00:27:04,320
Speaker 4: were talking about how, especially for people in MySpace and

622
00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:07,199
Speaker 4: your space, at this media and entertainment space, that you

623
00:27:07,240 --> 00:27:08,840
Speaker 4: pretty much just need it as a part of your

624
00:27:08,840 --> 00:27:12,840
Speaker 4: toolbox to actually just unpack and deal with the world

625
00:27:12,840 --> 00:27:16,560
Speaker 4: of social media and this constant like access people have

626
00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:19,520
Speaker 4: to you. But then also in my personal life as well,

627
00:27:19,560 --> 00:27:23,960
Speaker 4: like Jess and I now see a relationship. Yeah we

628
00:27:24,040 --> 00:27:27,359
Speaker 4: go see a couple's counselor or not because anything's wrong,

629
00:27:27,600 --> 00:27:30,520
Speaker 4: but because we've been together for fifteen years. It's like,

630
00:27:31,080 --> 00:27:32,960
Speaker 4: I think we've done pretty good to get through this

631
00:27:33,000 --> 00:27:35,000
Speaker 4: whole fifteen years, and for us it's just like a

632
00:27:35,119 --> 00:27:35,520
Speaker 4: check in.

633
00:27:35,880 --> 00:27:37,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, just so much has changed.

634
00:27:37,320 --> 00:27:39,160
Speaker 4: We were babies, you know, we met when we were

635
00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:42,040
Speaker 4: fucking both going off and doing drugs. Like we've been

636
00:27:42,040 --> 00:27:43,800
Speaker 4: with each other since we were in school, since we

637
00:27:43,880 --> 00:27:46,120
Speaker 4: had no money. So we've been through so many failures

638
00:27:46,160 --> 00:27:48,720
Speaker 4: with each other, we've had babies, We've done this, We've

639
00:27:48,760 --> 00:27:49,120
Speaker 4: done that.

640
00:27:49,720 --> 00:27:51,440
Speaker 3: I think to get through all of that.

641
00:27:52,320 --> 00:27:54,760
Speaker 1: I think I said in the same talk you're referring enjoy,

642
00:27:54,800 --> 00:27:56,960
Speaker 1: I say, like a therapist is like gym for your brain.

643
00:27:57,240 --> 00:27:59,320
Speaker 1: But I think to a couple, like, if you want

644
00:27:59,320 --> 00:28:01,640
Speaker 1: to be the best that you can be, I think

645
00:28:01,760 --> 00:28:02,720
Speaker 1: therapy like that's.

646
00:28:02,600 --> 00:28:05,000
Speaker 2: Something relationship health is just as important.

647
00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:06,960
Speaker 1: Ah Me and my boyfriend talk about at the time

648
00:28:06,960 --> 00:28:10,720
Speaker 1: and we're like, we're blissfully in love, but we're like yeah,

649
00:28:10,760 --> 00:28:13,479
Speaker 1: but we're like even sometimes about's like do you ever

650
00:28:13,520 --> 00:28:14,920
Speaker 1: want me to come to one of your sessions?

651
00:28:14,920 --> 00:28:16,879
Speaker 2: And I'm like, what a legend to.

652
00:28:16,920 --> 00:28:19,120
Speaker 3: Be so open and I hands down.

653
00:28:19,320 --> 00:28:22,120
Speaker 1: And I think that that's where people hear the word

654
00:28:22,200 --> 00:28:24,679
Speaker 1: therapy and think there's something either wrong with you or

655
00:28:24,720 --> 00:28:26,880
Speaker 1: you've got you're in a situation. Like you said, there's

656
00:28:26,880 --> 00:28:30,360
Speaker 1: a situation, but doesn't need to be. It can be like, Hey,

657
00:28:30,440 --> 00:28:30,960
Speaker 1: i just want to.

658
00:28:30,960 --> 00:28:34,560
Speaker 2: Be the best fucking version of myself, So I'm going

659
00:28:34,640 --> 00:28:35,320
Speaker 2: to do that.

660
00:28:35,400 --> 00:28:37,040
Speaker 4: I'm going to go to yoga or whatever you do

661
00:28:37,119 --> 00:28:38,240
Speaker 4: that makes you feel good.

662
00:28:38,640 --> 00:28:40,000
Speaker 2: It's continually improvement.

663
00:28:40,040 --> 00:28:43,000
Speaker 4: There's no one on this earth who could say they

664
00:28:43,040 --> 00:28:48,000
Speaker 4: don't need to improve because there's always something like yeah,

665
00:28:48,120 --> 00:28:50,400
Speaker 4: you know, even if you're in your ninety five, do

666
00:28:50,440 --> 00:28:52,360
Speaker 4: you know what I mean? You can it's if you're

667
00:28:52,360 --> 00:28:55,080
Speaker 4: not constantly moving forward, then what the fuck are you doing?

668
00:28:55,240 --> 00:28:57,800
Speaker 4: Totally and you don't have to know, like you don't

669
00:28:57,840 --> 00:28:59,800
Speaker 4: have to know what the goal is or the end

670
00:28:59,840 --> 00:29:02,240
Speaker 4: game is with it, like you know, for us, one

671
00:29:02,280 --> 00:29:04,000
Speaker 4: thing that I've taken away, like I listened to a

672
00:29:04,040 --> 00:29:08,160
Speaker 4: lot of podcasts as well, and obviously going to see

673
00:29:08,200 --> 00:29:09,840
Speaker 4: like a relationship counselor with Jesuit.

674
00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:11,320
Speaker 2: They give you really good.

675
00:29:11,160 --> 00:29:14,560
Speaker 4: Exercises on untapping things you might not have untapped. And

676
00:29:14,760 --> 00:29:16,920
Speaker 4: one of them that I'm really excited to do is

677
00:29:17,880 --> 00:29:21,000
Speaker 4: doing something together that neither of you are good at.

678
00:29:21,040 --> 00:29:23,200
Speaker 4: So like you know how like for example, you're really

679
00:29:23,200 --> 00:29:24,840
Speaker 4: good at yoga, right, so like you could get Matt

680
00:29:24,880 --> 00:29:25,560
Speaker 4: to come along and.

681
00:29:25,440 --> 00:29:28,640
Speaker 1: Do that, but it's going to be better and it's

682
00:29:28,720 --> 00:29:31,000
Speaker 1: so annoying, Well you know what I mean.

683
00:29:30,960 --> 00:29:32,760
Speaker 3: There's always someone who's gotten advantage.

684
00:29:32,840 --> 00:29:35,720
Speaker 4: But yeah, so when the weather gets a bit better,

685
00:29:35,760 --> 00:29:38,080
Speaker 4: we're you to go play golf because neither of us

686
00:29:38,080 --> 00:29:40,760
Speaker 4: know how to fight, and both of us like we

687
00:29:41,160 --> 00:29:42,240
Speaker 4: do you know what I mean, because you give me

688
00:29:42,320 --> 00:29:44,600
Speaker 4: videos of that place. Because what you just get to

689
00:29:44,640 --> 00:29:46,800
Speaker 4: do something to other, but also an extension of that

690
00:29:47,520 --> 00:29:52,920
Speaker 4: is do something together that scares you so diving I

691
00:29:52,920 --> 00:29:55,239
Speaker 4: don't know, because it really brings out in people like

692
00:29:55,320 --> 00:29:58,240
Speaker 4: that whole trust and nurturing thing, and it's a really

693
00:29:58,280 --> 00:30:01,120
Speaker 4: good way to tell, Like, for example, you did go

694
00:30:01,200 --> 00:30:03,760
Speaker 4: do something like that where it was a fear, but

695
00:30:03,760 --> 00:30:05,880
Speaker 4: then the person like wasn't supportive and you didn't feel

696
00:30:05,920 --> 00:30:08,720
Speaker 4: like that might be a reflection of your relationship. It's

697
00:30:08,760 --> 00:30:13,040
Speaker 4: amazing I've taken away from going to see and like

698
00:30:13,080 --> 00:30:15,280
Speaker 4: in our first session they sort of it was like

699
00:30:15,320 --> 00:30:17,200
Speaker 4: a get to know you and we talked about like

700
00:30:17,240 --> 00:30:19,880
Speaker 4: the things that first drew us to each other, and

701
00:30:19,960 --> 00:30:22,800
Speaker 4: just hearing that from each other like that was fifteen

702
00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:25,360
Speaker 4: years ago, and hearing how he felt when he first

703
00:30:25,400 --> 00:30:28,600
Speaker 4: met me and hearing like him hearing what I felt,

704
00:30:28,800 --> 00:30:29,760
Speaker 4: you know with him, Like.

705
00:30:29,760 --> 00:30:30,680
Speaker 2: It was really cool.

706
00:30:30,840 --> 00:30:34,040
Speaker 4: Yeah, Like I honestly reckon that for any couple, no

707
00:30:34,080 --> 00:30:38,480
Speaker 4: matter how happy you think you are. Oh, I'm so

708
00:30:38,560 --> 00:30:42,880
Speaker 4: glad that you shared that because I think, Yeah, I

709
00:30:42,920 --> 00:30:44,760
Speaker 4: just think it's actually an integral part of being a

710
00:30:44,760 --> 00:30:49,760
Speaker 4: good human being, mental and mental psychological health and just

711
00:30:49,800 --> 00:30:52,600
Speaker 4: being able to unpack shit well, and no two people

712
00:30:52,600 --> 00:30:54,920
Speaker 4: are the same. And so I feel like, you know,

713
00:30:55,080 --> 00:30:58,720
Speaker 4: being able to understand how he expresses, because with man

714
00:30:58,760 --> 00:31:01,120
Speaker 4: it's always a lot more in their actions and it.

715
00:31:01,080 --> 00:31:01,880
Speaker 2: Is in their words.

716
00:31:02,880 --> 00:31:04,880
Speaker 3: Just being able to yeah.

717
00:31:04,800 --> 00:31:08,320
Speaker 4: Unpack that, understand that you know, understand how you know

718
00:31:08,360 --> 00:31:10,840
Speaker 4: the languages of love and all that kind of stuff.

719
00:31:11,000 --> 00:31:13,840
Speaker 4: I think it's fascinating. And same with seeing my therapist.

720
00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:16,720
Speaker 4: Like sometimes I go and I'll talk to about.

721
00:31:16,560 --> 00:31:18,719
Speaker 3: Stuff and I'll be like, this is the most fucking

722
00:31:18,800 --> 00:31:19,680
Speaker 3: trivial shit ever.

723
00:31:19,720 --> 00:31:21,440
Speaker 2: But I'm like, I pat you to listen to this,

724
00:31:21,600 --> 00:31:23,160
Speaker 2: and you think that it's valid, do you know what

725
00:31:23,200 --> 00:31:23,560
Speaker 2: I mean?

726
00:31:23,600 --> 00:31:26,600
Speaker 4: Like even the trivial ones, Like even I'll be like

727
00:31:26,760 --> 00:31:28,880
Speaker 4: I'll say to my boyfriend, I'll be like, I've got

728
00:31:28,960 --> 00:31:30,640
Speaker 4: Terry Tay, I don't know what we're going to talk about.

729
00:31:30,640 --> 00:31:31,520
Speaker 2: I feel pretty clear.

730
00:31:31,880 --> 00:31:33,800
Speaker 1: I'll come out and I'll be like, oh my god,

731
00:31:33,840 --> 00:31:35,959
Speaker 1: I just bowled my eyes out and I did not

732
00:31:36,080 --> 00:31:38,640
Speaker 1: expect that to be happening, and it happens for me. Yeah,

733
00:31:38,680 --> 00:31:41,040
Speaker 1: And all you walk away from one that you're like,

734
00:31:41,080 --> 00:31:42,840
Speaker 1: I've got all this I want to work on this

735
00:31:42,880 --> 00:31:45,760
Speaker 1: thing this week, and I'm feeling shit about my body

736
00:31:45,760 --> 00:31:48,440
Speaker 1: image whatever it is, and you don't even talk about.

737
00:31:48,480 --> 00:31:52,280
Speaker 1: Like I walked out the other day and my boyfriend's like, oh,

738
00:31:52,320 --> 00:31:54,800
Speaker 1: what chalcout is Terry. I was like, we visualized me

739
00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:57,800
Speaker 1: being a panther, and he was like cool.

740
00:31:57,520 --> 00:31:58,040
Speaker 2: And I might know.

741
00:31:58,080 --> 00:32:00,560
Speaker 4: Seriously, I'm going to start researching panthers and I did.

742
00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:02,720
Speaker 4: And anytime i'd see like the sign for like a

743
00:32:03,200 --> 00:32:05,360
Speaker 4: or I was like, I don't know if I'm going

744
00:32:05,400 --> 00:32:06,720
Speaker 4: to be a panther or a jaguar, And then I

745
00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:08,240
Speaker 4: drove past like jaguar cars.

746
00:32:08,280 --> 00:32:11,040
Speaker 1: I was like, yes, I'm a jaguar anyway. It like

747
00:32:11,120 --> 00:32:13,320
Speaker 1: we go down my guys also a hit my therapist,

748
00:32:13,320 --> 00:32:19,200
Speaker 1: so we go right down rabbit holes. I want to

749
00:32:19,240 --> 00:32:22,320
Speaker 1: ask you because you are so much more courageous than

750
00:32:22,320 --> 00:32:24,360
Speaker 1: me and brave than me when it comes to body

751
00:32:24,400 --> 00:32:29,600
Speaker 1: image stuff. You post the most amazing stuff about your

752
00:32:29,640 --> 00:32:36,240
Speaker 1: body post bubbers all over social media, and I look

753
00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:38,760
Speaker 1: at it and I'm like, oh my god, you're fucking amazing.

754
00:32:38,760 --> 00:32:41,320
Speaker 1: And I think I just put fire fire emojis whenever

755
00:32:41,360 --> 00:32:43,240
Speaker 1: I see you do it.

756
00:32:43,440 --> 00:32:46,120
Speaker 2: But I know I couldn't do it. I know that, Like.

757
00:32:47,720 --> 00:32:50,640
Speaker 1: I still I still struggle with my body image every

758
00:32:50,760 --> 00:32:52,959
Speaker 1: day if I'm if I'm being completely honest, So like,

759
00:32:53,160 --> 00:32:55,640
Speaker 1: can you share your body image?

760
00:32:56,400 --> 00:32:58,520
Speaker 4: I think that's the thing, and that's the myth sometimes

761
00:32:58,640 --> 00:33:02,800
Speaker 4: is like when you share it for me sometimes when

762
00:33:02,800 --> 00:33:05,680
Speaker 4: I share those images, and especially like one sort of

763
00:33:05,840 --> 00:33:07,760
Speaker 4: one that went viral that I shared, I think I

764
00:33:07,840 --> 00:33:08,600
Speaker 4: was like a week.

765
00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:09,320
Speaker 2: After having Teddy.

766
00:33:10,320 --> 00:33:14,080
Speaker 4: Is that that was an unintentional photo first of all, Like, yeah,

767
00:33:14,640 --> 00:33:15,720
Speaker 4: it's Jess's cousin.

768
00:33:15,760 --> 00:33:17,280
Speaker 3: She's a photographer, she's amazing.

769
00:33:17,720 --> 00:33:22,040
Speaker 4: She'd done my my pregnancy ones that I did with Teddy.

770
00:33:22,080 --> 00:33:24,560
Speaker 4: They went viralful and she come over to take like

771
00:33:24,640 --> 00:33:27,200
Speaker 4: lifestyle pictures with her and we just happened to take

772
00:33:27,240 --> 00:33:29,000
Speaker 4: that and it was actually one that she gave to

773
00:33:29,000 --> 00:33:31,800
Speaker 4: me after she'd given me all the photos, and I

774
00:33:31,840 --> 00:33:35,080
Speaker 4: just remember seeing it and even though like I look

775
00:33:35,120 --> 00:33:36,360
Speaker 4: at it and I was like, you see all the

776
00:33:36,400 --> 00:33:38,040
Speaker 4: things that you don't like, I was like, you know what,

777
00:33:38,320 --> 00:33:41,360
Speaker 4: I'm going to share this. And I think that for me,

778
00:33:41,840 --> 00:33:45,120
Speaker 4: what it really stemmed from was as a as a

779
00:33:45,240 --> 00:33:49,160
Speaker 4: kid and growing up, I never had any body image

780
00:33:49,160 --> 00:33:50,840
Speaker 4: ses Like you said, I've never died it.

781
00:33:50,760 --> 00:33:51,720
Speaker 3: Ever in my life.

782
00:33:52,600 --> 00:33:53,400
Speaker 2: That's amazing.

783
00:33:54,240 --> 00:33:56,560
Speaker 3: My mom always it's not that my mom.

784
00:33:56,640 --> 00:33:57,960
Speaker 4: You know, people always ask me like where does it

785
00:33:57,960 --> 00:33:59,880
Speaker 4: come from? And mom was a single mom and she,

786
00:34:00,440 --> 00:34:03,120
Speaker 4: you know, we're very close and she's always been extremely supportive.

787
00:34:03,160 --> 00:34:05,120
Speaker 2: But when I actually think back to it, it's not

788
00:34:05,200 --> 00:34:05,960
Speaker 2: like my mum.

789
00:34:05,880 --> 00:34:07,640
Speaker 4: Was like, oh, body positive.

790
00:34:07,640 --> 00:34:11,520
Speaker 2: I mean, she definitely is actually incredible. Side note I

791
00:34:11,520 --> 00:34:15,440
Speaker 2: have been lacking after better a few times is that.

792
00:34:15,440 --> 00:34:18,040
Speaker 3: Mum always encouraged me to be active.

793
00:34:18,160 --> 00:34:20,640
Speaker 4: So from a young age, I did ballet, I did

794
00:34:20,760 --> 00:34:22,720
Speaker 4: like I was the kid that was like every season

795
00:34:22,800 --> 00:34:25,279
Speaker 4: changing sports, right, So Mum would have me, you know,

796
00:34:25,360 --> 00:34:27,880
Speaker 4: at ten, whatever I wanted to do, she would support it.

797
00:34:28,320 --> 00:34:35,080
Speaker 2: And I think that through instilling this need to sort of.

798
00:34:35,000 --> 00:34:37,319
Speaker 4: Be active, it made me appreciate my body and what

799
00:34:37,320 --> 00:34:39,719
Speaker 4: my body could do. So, you know, dancing for so

800
00:34:39,880 --> 00:34:43,000
Speaker 4: long and from a young age, I think I developed

801
00:34:43,040 --> 00:34:44,280
Speaker 4: like a lot of muscle memory.

802
00:34:44,320 --> 00:34:45,640
Speaker 2: So like I've any.

803
00:34:45,440 --> 00:34:48,040
Speaker 4: Sport that I've sort of like picked up, you know,

804
00:34:48,120 --> 00:34:50,840
Speaker 4: I've loved and I've sort of you know, been relatively

805
00:34:50,880 --> 00:34:53,239
Speaker 4: good at. But that was it, Like it was, Mum

806
00:34:53,320 --> 00:34:56,000
Speaker 4: never died at herself. There was never a focus on eating.

807
00:34:56,160 --> 00:34:59,160
Speaker 4: Like Mum was a smoker for a really long time

808
00:34:59,239 --> 00:35:02,040
Speaker 4: and so when she gave it up, she did gain

809
00:35:02,120 --> 00:35:03,799
Speaker 4: quite a bit of weight from that, but she never

810
00:35:04,600 --> 00:35:06,680
Speaker 4: was like do you know what I mean, Mum's always

811
00:35:06,680 --> 00:35:09,040
Speaker 4: been active and been healthy, so she's never put a

812
00:35:09,040 --> 00:35:10,719
Speaker 4: focus on how she looked.

813
00:35:12,160 --> 00:35:14,560
Speaker 3: In that assimilation to like, you know, that's so.

814
00:35:14,760 --> 00:35:16,799
Speaker 2: Power like that, like what a cool mum.

815
00:35:16,960 --> 00:35:20,640
Speaker 4: Yeah, And I just think that it was actually a

816
00:35:20,680 --> 00:35:23,200
Speaker 4: read between the lines thing in just the way that

817
00:35:23,239 --> 00:35:26,360
Speaker 4: she was. So you know, she even though yeah, you

818
00:35:26,400 --> 00:35:28,320
Speaker 4: know she later in life, you know, did gain a

819
00:35:28,320 --> 00:35:30,319
Speaker 4: bit of weight, she still went to the gym. She

820
00:35:30,400 --> 00:35:32,440
Speaker 4: still ate what she wanted to eat, like it was

821
00:35:33,080 --> 00:35:35,040
Speaker 4: always yeah, just there.

822
00:35:35,000 --> 00:35:36,520
Speaker 1: If you know what I mean, I think you've just

823
00:35:37,520 --> 00:35:41,719
Speaker 1: shared something really important. Healthy isn't skinny. No, healthy can

824
00:35:41,760 --> 00:35:45,680
Speaker 1: be a size fourteen, sixteen eighteen. That's that's tot that

825
00:35:45,719 --> 00:35:47,760
Speaker 1: can be someone's health exactly.

826
00:35:48,239 --> 00:35:49,080
Speaker 2: It's how you feel.

827
00:35:49,120 --> 00:35:51,319
Speaker 4: And I think that that's what Mum really sort of

828
00:35:51,400 --> 00:35:54,120
Speaker 4: like I guess, instilled in me. So then when I

829
00:35:54,239 --> 00:35:56,759
Speaker 4: did for pregnant, like I was always one of those

830
00:35:56,760 --> 00:35:57,479
Speaker 4: people that was.

831
00:35:57,400 --> 00:35:59,399
Speaker 3: Skinny and could eat anything, but.

832
00:35:59,320 --> 00:36:02,000
Speaker 4: I always remain relatively active, like I ran and I

833
00:36:02,040 --> 00:36:03,880
Speaker 4: went to the gym and even as a teen and

834
00:36:03,920 --> 00:36:06,960
Speaker 4: stuff like that. So when I felt pregnant, gaining that

835
00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:10,320
Speaker 4: much weight and then hating it and hating my body

836
00:36:10,360 --> 00:36:12,600
Speaker 4: and being really hard on myself, I feel like that

837
00:36:12,760 --> 00:36:16,360
Speaker 4: was a failure for me to myself of like letting

838
00:36:16,360 --> 00:36:19,800
Speaker 4: that anxiety cripple me, because.

839
00:36:19,600 --> 00:36:20,279
Speaker 3: That's what it was.

840
00:36:20,360 --> 00:36:22,279
Speaker 4: It was the sense of feeling out of control, that

841
00:36:22,320 --> 00:36:24,319
Speaker 4: I had no control over my own body, that I

842
00:36:24,400 --> 00:36:29,120
Speaker 4: was completely disconnected from the physical part of myself where

843
00:36:29,120 --> 00:36:31,160
Speaker 4: I was like, I don't identify with this person, like

844
00:36:31,560 --> 00:36:35,480
Speaker 4: gaining that much weight like I did, I struggled to breathe,

845
00:36:35,520 --> 00:36:39,239
Speaker 4: like I felt shit. I physically felt shit, and I

846
00:36:39,239 --> 00:36:43,439
Speaker 4: couldn't do anything about it. And you know, in those

847
00:36:43,520 --> 00:36:47,200
Speaker 4: months after, you know, carrying that extra weight and just

848
00:36:47,320 --> 00:36:51,160
Speaker 4: I just felt so disconnected from myself, both physically and

849
00:36:51,200 --> 00:36:54,279
Speaker 4: emotionally for so many reasons. And I felt like I

850
00:36:54,320 --> 00:36:57,720
Speaker 4: really did let myself down. And I think that that's why.

851
00:36:58,000 --> 00:36:59,400
Speaker 4: So when I was pregnant with Teddy, I was a

852
00:36:59,400 --> 00:37:04,480
Speaker 4: lot more active, and by doing that, I felt so

853
00:37:04,560 --> 00:37:06,880
Speaker 4: much better. I didn't I mean, I didn't gain as

854
00:37:06,960 --> 00:37:09,640
Speaker 4: much weight, but I felt better in myself for not

855
00:37:09,680 --> 00:37:12,720
Speaker 4: carrying all that extra weight, and I felt more in control.

856
00:37:12,760 --> 00:37:14,359
Speaker 2: I was gonna say, you took the control back.

857
00:37:14,480 --> 00:37:16,239
Speaker 4: I took the control back a bit because I did

858
00:37:16,360 --> 00:37:18,120
Speaker 4: when I was pregnant with Annabelle. I just sat in

859
00:37:18,160 --> 00:37:19,680
Speaker 4: it and let it take over me, you know what

860
00:37:19,680 --> 00:37:21,560
Speaker 4: I mean. And I didn't do anything about it, and

861
00:37:21,600 --> 00:37:22,080
Speaker 4: I let it.

862
00:37:22,080 --> 00:37:24,680
Speaker 1: You were so young too, like twenty three, You're just

863
00:37:24,719 --> 00:37:26,120
Speaker 1: like what's and then.

864
00:37:26,040 --> 00:37:28,040
Speaker 4: You've got you know, you step on the scales every

865
00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:29,680
Speaker 4: time you go to the doctors and they make you

866
00:37:29,719 --> 00:37:32,000
Speaker 4: feel shit like, well, you're gaining a bit too much weight?

867
00:37:32,520 --> 00:37:34,960
Speaker 4: Fuck off, mate, Oh god. And I'm like, no, I

868
00:37:35,000 --> 00:37:36,920
Speaker 4: don't want to step on scales when I'm pregnant. Like

869
00:37:37,000 --> 00:37:39,480
Speaker 4: so literally, since I had Annabelle, I never stepped on

870
00:37:39,520 --> 00:37:40,840
Speaker 4: scales when I was pregnant with Teddy.

871
00:37:41,080 --> 00:37:41,839
Speaker 3: I haven't known.

872
00:37:41,760 --> 00:37:42,680
Speaker 2: Scales for six years.

873
00:37:42,840 --> 00:37:44,960
Speaker 3: Oh good girl, Because to me, that was the.

874
00:37:44,920 --> 00:37:47,719
Speaker 4: Point in what I actually realized that it's not about like,

875
00:37:47,760 --> 00:37:49,120
Speaker 4: it's not about the number that you see on the

876
00:37:49,120 --> 00:37:49,760
Speaker 4: set of scales.

877
00:37:49,760 --> 00:37:52,440
Speaker 2: It's how you feel in any circumstance. Totally.

878
00:37:52,440 --> 00:37:54,520
Speaker 1: I was gonna say, like, just in a regular normal,

879
00:37:54,600 --> 00:37:58,919
Speaker 1: non pregnant human being. Muscle weighs four times more than fat.

880
00:37:59,040 --> 00:38:00,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, so if.

881
00:38:00,200 --> 00:38:04,560
Speaker 1: You're toned and fit and strong, you might be five

882
00:38:04,640 --> 00:38:06,359
Speaker 1: kilos heavier than when you were skinny fat.

883
00:38:06,520 --> 00:38:08,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly, exactly.

884
00:38:08,360 --> 00:38:12,200
Speaker 4: And I think too that, you know, since having Teddy

885
00:38:12,200 --> 00:38:14,600
Speaker 4: and obviously that image going viral, and then from that,

886
00:38:14,719 --> 00:38:17,360
Speaker 4: I had so many people share their own stories with me,

887
00:38:17,800 --> 00:38:21,239
Speaker 4: not just around pregnancy, but through any relationship they've had

888
00:38:21,239 --> 00:38:21,840
Speaker 4: with their body.

889
00:38:21,880 --> 00:38:23,160
Speaker 3: That's why I did that Body.

890
00:38:22,880 --> 00:38:25,520
Speaker 2: Image project where I got all those women together. Yeah,

891
00:38:25,520 --> 00:38:26,560
Speaker 2: that was so good.

892
00:38:26,680 --> 00:38:28,920
Speaker 4: You know, we had people who would experienced eating disorders,

893
00:38:28,960 --> 00:38:33,399
Speaker 4: We had people that had, you know, experienced abuse as

894
00:38:33,400 --> 00:38:35,759
Speaker 4: a child and how that affected their relationship with their

895
00:38:35,800 --> 00:38:38,600
Speaker 4: body and how they saw themselves. Like all these different

896
00:38:38,640 --> 00:38:40,920
Speaker 4: stories that are still housed on the blog. You can

897
00:38:40,920 --> 00:38:42,439
Speaker 4: go read them and you can go see the video

898
00:38:42,560 --> 00:38:45,920
Speaker 4: and because everyone spoke their stories as well, and it

899
00:38:45,960 --> 00:38:46,399
Speaker 4: would just.

900
00:38:46,719 --> 00:38:48,040
Speaker 2: You're all in your undies, weren't you.

901
00:38:48,239 --> 00:38:51,759
Speaker 4: Yeah Yeah, so no, that was that was really good,

902
00:38:51,760 --> 00:38:53,879
Speaker 4: and that was really empowering for me to be able

903
00:38:53,920 --> 00:38:56,160
Speaker 4: to then help not just share my story, but share

904
00:38:56,200 --> 00:39:01,399
Speaker 4: other people's stories. And it's just sort of awakened. That

905
00:39:01,600 --> 00:39:05,480
Speaker 4: passion in me and that purpose in me. You know,

906
00:39:05,520 --> 00:39:08,839
Speaker 4: I guess I feel so privileged living and growing up

907
00:39:08,840 --> 00:39:10,719
Speaker 4: with the mother that I had, in a role model

908
00:39:10,719 --> 00:39:14,280
Speaker 4: that I had, then sort of going through that time

909
00:39:14,360 --> 00:39:16,960
Speaker 4: where I felt like I let myself down and evictively

910
00:39:17,040 --> 00:39:18,799
Speaker 4: let my my mom down, and those lessons that she

911
00:39:18,880 --> 00:39:21,000
Speaker 4: taught me that what can I learn from this?

912
00:39:21,080 --> 00:39:22,680
Speaker 3: And then how can I help other people?

913
00:39:22,880 --> 00:39:26,279
Speaker 1: And also your kids too, Like I think knowing to

914
00:39:26,400 --> 00:39:29,600
Speaker 1: the little chickens, to little girls, because you.

915
00:39:29,560 --> 00:39:31,480
Speaker 4: See how important it is and you see how one

916
00:39:32,360 --> 00:39:36,680
Speaker 4: moment in time can set the narrative for your entire life.

917
00:39:37,160 --> 00:39:38,239
Speaker 2: Oh.

918
00:39:38,280 --> 00:39:40,959
Speaker 1: Absolutely, Like it's amazing that you have such a great

919
00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:45,360
Speaker 1: relationship with your body post Yeah, the first pregnancy was

920
00:39:45,360 --> 00:39:47,040
Speaker 1: then about like I think that that's.

921
00:39:46,840 --> 00:39:49,399
Speaker 4: A yeah, you know, I will get in I will

922
00:39:49,440 --> 00:39:51,440
Speaker 4: get in my bathis, I'll get in my bikini, you know,

923
00:39:51,480 --> 00:39:53,040
Speaker 4: and go to the beach with my girls. And you know,

924
00:39:53,080 --> 00:39:54,799
Speaker 4: I don't care how I look and old post an

925
00:39:54,800 --> 00:39:57,640
Speaker 4: image where I might look at it and be like, oh,

926
00:39:57,800 --> 00:39:59,360
Speaker 4: I was almost like a shit angle, But I'm like,

927
00:39:59,400 --> 00:40:01,480
Speaker 4: you know what what I look like from that angle.

928
00:40:01,400 --> 00:40:03,160
Speaker 2: So I can't change it.

929
00:40:03,400 --> 00:40:05,359
Speaker 4: Yes, it's an unfluttering angle. But it's what I look

930
00:40:05,480 --> 00:40:07,800
Speaker 4: like from that angle. And we all have those angles.

931
00:40:07,960 --> 00:40:11,560
Speaker 4: We all have those angles. And I think for me

932
00:40:11,600 --> 00:40:14,120
Speaker 4: it's so important. You know, my daughter's nearly six, and

933
00:40:14,160 --> 00:40:15,200
Speaker 4: I see how.

934
00:40:17,000 --> 00:40:18,520
Speaker 2: They're just little sponges, do you know.

935
00:40:18,520 --> 00:40:18,960
Speaker 3: What I mean?

936
00:40:19,040 --> 00:40:20,960
Speaker 4: Like you don't realize how much they're taking on and

937
00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:23,799
Speaker 4: they're taking in, and you know, she's so aware, and

938
00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:27,000
Speaker 4: I never want to be like, oh, here's your sandwiches,

939
00:40:27,040 --> 00:40:29,040
Speaker 4: but mommy can't have bread because you know, mummy doesn't,

940
00:40:29,080 --> 00:40:30,480
Speaker 4: you know, and then having to explain that.

941
00:40:30,480 --> 00:40:30,959
Speaker 2: To a kid.

942
00:40:31,360 --> 00:40:34,760
Speaker 4: So I'm just like, it's just about being healthy, making

943
00:40:34,800 --> 00:40:40,160
Speaker 4: healthy choices, and having healthy options and yeah, not sort

944
00:40:40,160 --> 00:40:43,840
Speaker 4: of like saying what you can't have, but saying, yeah,

945
00:40:43,920 --> 00:40:45,920
Speaker 4: you know this is good for you know, this is

946
00:40:45,960 --> 00:40:49,279
Speaker 4: good and explaining to kids why and talking to them

947
00:40:49,320 --> 00:40:50,719
Speaker 4: about how they feel.

948
00:40:50,400 --> 00:40:53,080
Speaker 2: When they eat those things or when they do those things.

949
00:40:53,120 --> 00:41:08,120
Speaker 2: And it's more like speaking about food first now, got

950
00:41:08,160 --> 00:41:08,520
Speaker 2: a cough.

951
00:41:09,760 --> 00:41:11,919
Speaker 4: It's more that we just show our kids through our

952
00:41:11,960 --> 00:41:14,960
Speaker 4: actions of being healthy and being my mom did with me.

953
00:41:15,800 --> 00:41:19,800
Speaker 1: I can't get it, Like, so I my mum is awesome,

954
00:41:19,880 --> 00:41:22,160
Speaker 1: Like I love her. She's quirky as anything, but she

955
00:41:22,360 --> 00:41:25,959
Speaker 1: was at my age model and yeah, and I still

956
00:41:26,000 --> 00:41:28,040
Speaker 1: remember on Sunday nights would be like junk food night,

957
00:41:28,080 --> 00:41:30,440
Speaker 1: but Mum would make soup for herself. So when you

958
00:41:30,680 --> 00:41:33,799
Speaker 1: talk about like, oh, mummy has to eat something different, like,

959
00:41:33,880 --> 00:41:36,719
Speaker 1: you don't realize the subconscious effect that has. And then

960
00:41:36,840 --> 00:41:39,040
Speaker 1: me a young twenty year old having a really strong

961
00:41:39,200 --> 00:41:41,560
Speaker 1: and there's not I would definitely not say I love

962
00:41:41,600 --> 00:41:45,080
Speaker 1: her mom. She's freaking awesome and hilarious, but like I'm

963
00:41:45,280 --> 00:41:48,520
Speaker 1: she's tiny, tiny winnie, like taller than me, fifty three

964
00:41:48,600 --> 00:41:53,359
Speaker 1: kilos pinus. Yeah, yeah, exactly. And I know that I've

965
00:41:53,360 --> 00:41:56,640
Speaker 1: compared myself to my mum growing up. You know, I'm

966
00:41:56,640 --> 00:41:59,080
Speaker 1: like god, same genetics, I should be that size and

967
00:41:59,080 --> 00:42:02,120
Speaker 1: I'm a pretty small human being too, But because you're comparing,

968
00:42:02,840 --> 00:42:05,840
Speaker 1: you don't see that. And I think, like, you're so

969
00:42:05,920 --> 00:42:08,200
Speaker 1: lucky that your mum was just like just be active,

970
00:42:08,280 --> 00:42:11,920
Speaker 1: have fun, be healthy, be vital. Like I'm getting this

971
00:42:12,000 --> 00:42:14,439
Speaker 1: and you're a very vital human being as well, So

972
00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:18,680
Speaker 1: I think you I know that you would be imparting

973
00:42:18,680 --> 00:42:20,560
Speaker 1: this with your girls. I can't leave how fast this

974
00:42:20,600 --> 00:42:22,399
Speaker 1: is going, I've got I really really want to talk

975
00:42:22,440 --> 00:42:24,000
Speaker 1: to you about because this is.

976
00:42:25,880 --> 00:42:26,640
Speaker 2: You're the best.

977
00:42:26,760 --> 00:42:30,080
Speaker 1: Actually, So I want to talk because you and I

978
00:42:30,239 --> 00:42:32,640
Speaker 1: often when we have like little brecky dates or coffee

979
00:42:32,719 --> 00:42:34,520
Speaker 1: dates or whatever dates, we.

980
00:42:34,640 --> 00:42:36,839
Speaker 3: End up we don't have enough of them. By the way,

981
00:42:36,920 --> 00:42:37,479
Speaker 3: this is true.

982
00:42:37,560 --> 00:42:39,160
Speaker 1: The last time I think I was having porridge at

983
00:42:39,200 --> 00:42:40,680
Speaker 1: that Willow place and you got hits.

984
00:42:40,760 --> 00:42:43,120
Speaker 2: I remember, so yummy.

985
00:42:43,320 --> 00:42:48,160
Speaker 4: But the mistakes I think in Star you know, like

986
00:42:48,400 --> 00:42:50,240
Speaker 4: you had a podcast. You're just telling me you fucked

987
00:42:50,280 --> 00:42:52,360
Speaker 4: up two episodes when you had your own podcast with

988
00:42:52,440 --> 00:42:56,640
Speaker 4: two people that like would be very high end people

989
00:42:56,680 --> 00:42:58,839
Speaker 4: to get, you know what I mean? Yeah, that was fun,

990
00:42:59,120 --> 00:43:01,359
Speaker 4: and you know you've got your blog as well, and

991
00:43:01,440 --> 00:43:04,000
Speaker 4: like we were talking about like and you know, I

992
00:43:04,040 --> 00:43:05,759
Speaker 4: hope you don't mean saying this, so you tell me

993
00:43:05,760 --> 00:43:07,239
Speaker 4: if you want me to cut it, but like it

994
00:43:07,239 --> 00:43:10,879
Speaker 4: happens with me in the book world as well, like copycats. Yeah,

995
00:43:10,920 --> 00:43:12,880
Speaker 4: so there's so much for all the good stuff that

996
00:43:12,880 --> 00:43:15,160
Speaker 4: people say, there's so much shit, and there's so much

997
00:43:15,200 --> 00:43:17,160
Speaker 4: that you've got to navigate and you've got to almost

998
00:43:17,160 --> 00:43:19,880
Speaker 4: be your own producer and be like, yeah, hang on

999
00:43:19,920 --> 00:43:23,120
Speaker 4: a minute, you can't do that, Like you're just and

1000
00:43:23,200 --> 00:43:26,480
Speaker 4: even like we were talking about like signing with managers

1001
00:43:26,560 --> 00:43:27,239
Speaker 4: and all that kind.

1002
00:43:27,120 --> 00:43:28,320
Speaker 2: Of thing like that it's tough.

1003
00:43:28,680 --> 00:43:31,239
Speaker 4: It's everyone wants something from you and you have a

1004
00:43:31,280 --> 00:43:33,239
Speaker 4: dollar sign on your head. And I think once you

1005
00:43:33,400 --> 00:43:36,200
Speaker 4: know that, you kind of can go into business a

1006
00:43:36,200 --> 00:43:38,279
Speaker 4: bit more business savvy, which you are, So tell me

1007
00:43:38,320 --> 00:43:40,719
Speaker 4: about some of the shit you've learned about these platforms.

1008
00:43:40,800 --> 00:43:43,080
Speaker 4: I think that that's the thing that's the misconception, because

1009
00:43:43,120 --> 00:43:44,640
Speaker 4: I get a lot of people come to me, like

1010
00:43:44,680 --> 00:43:46,960
Speaker 4: I've been doing it for six years now. I got

1011
00:43:47,000 --> 00:43:48,720
Speaker 4: a lot of people come to me like for advice

1012
00:43:48,760 --> 00:43:50,520
Speaker 4: and how everyone's like, oh, you're so good at this

1013
00:43:50,640 --> 00:43:52,279
Speaker 4: or you're you know, you've been so successful, But they

1014
00:43:52,320 --> 00:43:55,040
Speaker 4: don't realize that I've fucked up like so many times

1015
00:43:55,080 --> 00:43:57,200
Speaker 4: along the way to learn that, like to learn the

1016
00:43:57,280 --> 00:43:58,320
Speaker 4: right way to do something.

1017
00:43:58,560 --> 00:44:01,479
Speaker 2: I fucked it up ten times. I wrote to you, going, mate,

1018
00:44:01,480 --> 00:44:03,520
Speaker 2: I'm losing all my forwards. What do I do when

1019
00:44:03,560 --> 00:44:06,920
Speaker 2: You're like, like join the club?

1020
00:44:07,800 --> 00:44:10,239
Speaker 4: Because people are so fickle now, I find with you know,

1021
00:44:10,280 --> 00:44:12,279
Speaker 4: Instagram and stuff, because it's not what it was six

1022
00:44:12,360 --> 00:44:14,600
Speaker 4: years ago. And you would know this, like you're of

1023
00:44:14,600 --> 00:44:17,560
Speaker 4: the generation that you know we probably you know pioneered

1024
00:44:17,600 --> 00:44:19,640
Speaker 4: it a little bit, and like it's one of those

1025
00:44:19,640 --> 00:44:22,040
Speaker 4: things there's no handbook for it because we don't have

1026
00:44:22,080 --> 00:44:24,320
Speaker 4: control of it like Instagram does. We don't own the platform,

1027
00:44:24,400 --> 00:44:26,840
Speaker 4: so they're constantly changing it. So you've got to be adaptive.

1028
00:44:27,880 --> 00:44:29,719
Speaker 4: You know, what worked last year might not.

1029
00:44:29,719 --> 00:44:30,439
Speaker 3: Work this year.

1030
00:44:30,719 --> 00:44:32,680
Speaker 2: You're losing followers, all this kind of stuff.

1031
00:44:32,719 --> 00:44:35,960
Speaker 4: But the one thing for me, like through building it

1032
00:44:36,040 --> 00:44:38,799
Speaker 4: and you know, starting things and doing things, like there's

1033
00:44:38,840 --> 00:44:41,520
Speaker 4: probably things that I've done that people have completely forgotten

1034
00:44:41,560 --> 00:44:44,360
Speaker 4: about or didn't even realize that I did because it failed,

1035
00:44:44,560 --> 00:44:49,800
Speaker 4: like solaz my website for example. Like I've had multiple

1036
00:44:49,800 --> 00:44:54,440
Speaker 4: web designers wasted thousands I'm not joking thousands of dollars

1037
00:44:54,480 --> 00:44:57,359
Speaker 4: on development for things that never even saw the light

1038
00:44:57,400 --> 00:44:59,920
Speaker 4: of day because you know, I got the wrong per

1039
00:45:00,440 --> 00:45:02,239
Speaker 4: or I cheaped out or you know this at the

1040
00:45:02,280 --> 00:45:02,960
Speaker 4: other plus.

1041
00:45:02,680 --> 00:45:05,200
Speaker 2: Web designs was a fucking nightmare and I.

1042
00:45:05,120 --> 00:45:07,360
Speaker 4: Still to this day do it all myself. My website

1043
00:45:07,400 --> 00:45:10,040
Speaker 4: is me. I've coded it everything, Yeah, because it was

1044
00:45:10,120 --> 00:45:12,680
Speaker 4: just too fucking hard to handle. So it's cost me time,

1045
00:45:12,719 --> 00:45:14,919
Speaker 4: it's cost me money, you know, and had to teach

1046
00:45:14,960 --> 00:45:18,279
Speaker 4: yourself as well. Yeah, teach myself and all that kind

1047
00:45:18,320 --> 00:45:21,080
Speaker 4: of stuff, and people don't realize, like they want the

1048
00:45:21,160 --> 00:45:23,960
Speaker 4: quick answer to how to be successful, but they don't

1049
00:45:24,000 --> 00:45:27,320
Speaker 4: realize that it comes through the failures and the lessons.

1050
00:45:27,400 --> 00:45:31,000
Speaker 4: Like I remember once I had, you know, I was

1051
00:45:31,000 --> 00:45:33,319
Speaker 4: getting freelancers at one point to do little things in

1052
00:45:33,360 --> 00:45:37,080
Speaker 4: my website, and and one day I went to my

1053
00:45:37,120 --> 00:45:39,560
Speaker 4: website and I was selling fake nikes, which was just

1054
00:45:39,600 --> 00:45:41,759
Speaker 4: a page that was flogging fake nikes, and there were

1055
00:45:41,880 --> 00:45:44,400
Speaker 4: malicious code had been put into my website by one

1056
00:45:44,440 --> 00:45:48,520
Speaker 4: of these freelancers. Yeah, because I was using like overseas freelancers,

1057
00:45:48,520 --> 00:45:52,160
Speaker 4: and then I had the very expensive exercise of having

1058
00:45:52,239 --> 00:45:55,279
Speaker 4: to get someone to find the malicious code get rid

1059
00:45:55,320 --> 00:45:55,520
Speaker 4: of it.

1060
00:45:55,600 --> 00:45:57,560
Speaker 3: And then from that I learned to have.

1061
00:45:57,480 --> 00:46:00,680
Speaker 4: Two factor authentification on like everything, like so I never

1062
00:46:00,719 --> 00:46:01,560
Speaker 4: got hacked again.

1063
00:46:01,760 --> 00:46:03,799
Speaker 1: So that means to make a change, you need to

1064
00:46:04,480 --> 00:46:05,680
Speaker 1: you need to yeah, so like.

1065
00:46:05,640 --> 00:46:07,480
Speaker 4: You get the texted so like you don't just need

1066
00:46:07,480 --> 00:46:11,960
Speaker 4: the password. And I've got password protectors, I've got you know,

1067
00:46:12,600 --> 00:46:16,200
Speaker 4: widgets and stuff on my website. I've got a password

1068
00:46:16,200 --> 00:46:18,960
Speaker 4: manager on my phone, like I have every single you know.

1069
00:46:18,960 --> 00:46:20,400
Speaker 4: But I learned that the hard way, do you know,

1070
00:46:20,400 --> 00:46:22,200
Speaker 4: what I mean. And you see it all the time.

1071
00:46:22,239 --> 00:46:24,359
Speaker 4: People get hacked on Instagram, and it's like, that's your

1072
00:46:24,360 --> 00:46:26,720
Speaker 4: money maker. So if you get hacked, like you're storied

1073
00:46:28,160 --> 00:46:31,439
Speaker 4: other things as well. That like like you were talking about,

1074
00:46:31,480 --> 00:46:34,279
Speaker 4: like with copycats and that. Like I've recently had a

1075
00:46:34,320 --> 00:46:37,799
Speaker 4: really painful experience where my graphic designer, who i'd do

1076
00:46:37,920 --> 00:46:42,280
Speaker 4: since twenty sixteen, who had created my entire style guide,

1077
00:46:42,320 --> 00:46:45,920
Speaker 4: like all my documents, how everything looked, the fonts, just everything,

1078
00:46:46,800 --> 00:46:48,799
Speaker 4: someone else has come to that graphic design I just

1079
00:46:48,840 --> 00:46:51,160
Speaker 4: ripped off everything, not just how it looks, but the

1080
00:46:51,200 --> 00:46:54,040
Speaker 4: content and what the fuck do you do.

1081
00:46:54,080 --> 00:46:56,399
Speaker 1: It looks that you sent me a few weeks ago.

1082
00:46:56,400 --> 00:46:57,840
Speaker 1: You were like, do these look the same? And I'm like,

1083
00:46:57,960 --> 00:46:58,759
Speaker 1: isn't it the same?

1084
00:46:58,800 --> 00:47:01,120
Speaker 4: You're like, so that's your what's is their's the cliake

1085
00:47:01,120 --> 00:47:02,480
Speaker 4: And you're like I'm like, no, no, this this is

1086
00:47:02,520 --> 00:47:03,359
Speaker 4: them side by side.

1087
00:47:03,440 --> 00:47:04,000
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1088
00:47:04,040 --> 00:47:08,080
Speaker 4: And you know again, like I didn't have like a

1089
00:47:08,080 --> 00:47:10,960
Speaker 4: solid contract in place with the graphic designer. It was

1090
00:47:11,000 --> 00:47:13,280
Speaker 4: a friend of a friend. So then you've got that politics.

1091
00:47:13,280 --> 00:47:16,200
Speaker 4: Then you've got the Instagram politics. It's like, well, at

1092
00:47:16,200 --> 00:47:17,799
Speaker 4: the end of the day, it's just going to be like,

1093
00:47:18,080 --> 00:47:20,840
Speaker 4: you know, who likes this person and who likes that person, they'll.

1094
00:47:20,680 --> 00:47:21,960
Speaker 3: See what they want to see.

1095
00:47:22,920 --> 00:47:24,600
Speaker 4: But everyone in our space saw it, and I got

1096
00:47:24,760 --> 00:47:27,279
Speaker 4: multiple messages about it, so I knew that people were

1097
00:47:27,320 --> 00:47:29,759
Speaker 4: seeing it and they know. And I guess at the

1098
00:47:29,840 --> 00:47:31,640
Speaker 4: end of the day, what really got me through that

1099
00:47:31,840 --> 00:47:35,040
Speaker 4: was just knowing that, you know, I've done everything the

1100
00:47:35,080 --> 00:47:36,880
Speaker 4: hard way, because like I'll be like, all right, I'm

1101
00:47:36,880 --> 00:47:38,239
Speaker 4: going to do this. I don't know if it's going

1102
00:47:38,280 --> 00:47:40,080
Speaker 4: to be successful. I could be throwing money away, but

1103
00:47:40,120 --> 00:47:43,279
Speaker 4: I'm just gonna do it right. And so you you

1104
00:47:43,320 --> 00:47:45,480
Speaker 4: take all the risk and then people just see what's

1105
00:47:45,520 --> 00:47:46,879
Speaker 4: been successful and.

1106
00:47:46,880 --> 00:47:47,719
Speaker 3: Nanny just do that.

1107
00:47:47,920 --> 00:47:51,719
Speaker 4: It's fucking lazy. Like, let's be honest. You put all

1108
00:47:51,760 --> 00:47:54,600
Speaker 4: this hard work in for years. You for every one

1109
00:47:54,680 --> 00:47:57,480
Speaker 4: successful thing you've done, there's ten fails, and then someone

1110
00:47:57,520 --> 00:48:00,319
Speaker 4: just comes along and does the one thing that was successful, and.

1111
00:48:00,239 --> 00:48:01,520
Speaker 3: I'm like, well, you have to live with that.

1112
00:48:01,560 --> 00:48:03,600
Speaker 2: You have to live with knowing that you kind of cheated.

1113
00:48:04,120 --> 00:48:07,759
Speaker 4: And also from that, what I also realized too now

1114
00:48:07,960 --> 00:48:11,000
Speaker 4: is that you can replicate something that's been successful, but

1115
00:48:11,040 --> 00:48:14,040
Speaker 4: you can never replicate someone's passionate purpose. So that's what

1116
00:48:14,120 --> 00:48:16,440
Speaker 4: I was going to say, they get short term success

1117
00:48:16,560 --> 00:48:20,120
Speaker 4: because if you're not the real deal, people can people

1118
00:48:20,160 --> 00:48:22,680
Speaker 4: can pick a dingo eventually because if you're an idiot

1119
00:48:22,680 --> 00:48:23,840
Speaker 4: that's going to copy someone.

1120
00:48:24,040 --> 00:48:26,200
Speaker 2: Yea. And your ego is too big. There's a lot

1121
00:48:26,239 --> 00:48:28,080
Speaker 2: of ego in our world. Yeah.

1122
00:48:28,360 --> 00:48:31,279
Speaker 1: And if your ego's too big, we were discussing this

1123
00:48:31,360 --> 00:48:33,959
Speaker 1: right before we got on. If your ego's too big,

1124
00:48:33,960 --> 00:48:36,719
Speaker 1: eventually your ego will undo itself.

1125
00:48:37,040 --> 00:48:38,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, you are your own worst enemy.

1126
00:48:38,880 --> 00:48:41,960
Speaker 4: I truly believe, and everyone comes undone to agree because

1127
00:48:42,360 --> 00:48:44,600
Speaker 4: I know for all my content, like we talked.

1128
00:48:44,360 --> 00:48:47,000
Speaker 2: About with you know, budgeting and saving and all that stuff.

1129
00:48:47,040 --> 00:48:50,600
Speaker 4: Like you know, I just went to Facebook HQ in

1130
00:48:50,680 --> 00:48:54,439
Speaker 4: San Francisco, but I talked about like I talk about

1131
00:48:54,480 --> 00:48:58,080
Speaker 4: selling online and obviously you know market Facebook, marketplace and

1132
00:48:58,120 --> 00:49:00,040
Speaker 4: stuff like that. You know, they came to me, and

1133
00:49:00,400 --> 00:49:02,640
Speaker 4: you know, I've been in contact with them for such

1134
00:49:02,680 --> 00:49:05,399
Speaker 4: a long period of time because I had it wasn't

1135
00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:07,360
Speaker 4: a passion for their product, but I had a passion

1136
00:49:07,400 --> 00:49:10,720
Speaker 4: for the meaning behind it, you know, trying to help women,

1137
00:49:11,480 --> 00:49:14,239
Speaker 4: especially young mums and you know married couples and growing

1138
00:49:14,320 --> 00:49:16,080
Speaker 4: up with a single mom who got left with a

1139
00:49:16,080 --> 00:49:18,520
Speaker 4: baby and nothing else. Like I know where my passion

1140
00:49:18,520 --> 00:49:20,200
Speaker 4: and my purpose comes from, and I know where all

1141
00:49:20,200 --> 00:49:24,279
Speaker 4: this content stems from. You can't replicate that, and you

1142
00:49:24,320 --> 00:49:27,719
Speaker 4: know it fucking sucks at the time when you know,

1143
00:49:27,920 --> 00:49:29,680
Speaker 4: you're like, there's a fucking.

1144
00:49:29,440 --> 00:49:33,520
Speaker 2: Roof up exactly, Like we all take inspo from totally,

1145
00:49:33,920 --> 00:49:35,360
Speaker 2: no one, very very.

1146
00:49:35,239 --> 00:49:37,799
Speaker 4: It's very uncommon these days in our space that people

1147
00:49:37,800 --> 00:49:40,760
Speaker 4: actually piney or something like it's the first ever totally,

1148
00:49:40,920 --> 00:49:43,399
Speaker 4: so you know, and you know you see it every

1149
00:49:43,440 --> 00:49:44,800
Speaker 4: now and again, and you're like, oh, yeah, it's a

1150
00:49:44,800 --> 00:49:46,960
Speaker 4: bit fla because it's the acknowledgement that like, you did

1151
00:49:47,000 --> 00:49:49,719
Speaker 4: something that people liked and stuff. But when someone just

1152
00:49:49,760 --> 00:49:51,880
Speaker 4: flat out constantly does it, like not just to you,

1153
00:49:51,960 --> 00:49:54,360
Speaker 4: but other people time and time again, where it's like

1154
00:49:54,680 --> 00:49:57,880
Speaker 4: just ripping off the successful ideas, like and you're like,

1155
00:49:57,920 --> 00:49:59,080
Speaker 4: where's the meaning behind this?

1156
00:49:59,160 --> 00:49:59,920
Speaker 2: Where's the purpose?

1157
00:50:00,000 --> 00:50:03,759
Speaker 4: It's like I can see that, okay, Like is it

1158
00:50:03,840 --> 00:50:06,000
Speaker 4: for fame? Is it for the not variety? Because I

1159
00:50:06,040 --> 00:50:10,200
Speaker 4: can't see what else there is. I think it's for

1160
00:50:10,239 --> 00:50:12,319
Speaker 4: people that chase fame for the wrong reason. So if

1161
00:50:12,360 --> 00:50:15,839
Speaker 4: you chase fame for fame to be recognized or famous,

1162
00:50:15,960 --> 00:50:18,440
Speaker 4: or it's not an end goal. It's just a byproduct

1163
00:50:18,440 --> 00:50:20,759
Speaker 4: of things that you do. Like fame is actually not a.

1164
00:50:20,719 --> 00:50:22,200
Speaker 2: Goal and it's not lasting.

1165
00:50:22,480 --> 00:50:26,520
Speaker 1: No, it's so fleeting, it's fake that there's a massive

1166
00:50:26,600 --> 00:50:28,960
Speaker 1: element of it that's not real. And that's why I say,

1167
00:50:28,960 --> 00:50:30,560
Speaker 1: if you don't know, And when you said just then

1168
00:50:30,560 --> 00:50:32,399
Speaker 1: you're like, I know why I'm doing what I'm doing.

1169
00:50:33,080 --> 00:50:35,400
Speaker 1: When your purpose or in yoga we call it dama.

1170
00:50:35,640 --> 00:50:37,160
Speaker 1: When your dama is on.

1171
00:50:37,160 --> 00:50:41,560
Speaker 4: Pointy podcasts and they were talking about that what that is.

1172
00:50:41,680 --> 00:50:44,560
Speaker 1: Yes, it's like when you're living your bliss or your purpose,

1173
00:50:44,640 --> 00:50:47,719
Speaker 1: what your true calling is. When you're on point with that,

1174
00:50:47,840 --> 00:50:49,399
Speaker 1: you can feel it, you feel it in your heart.

1175
00:50:49,520 --> 00:50:51,560
Speaker 1: You've spoken a lot today. We haven't talked about it,

1176
00:50:51,560 --> 00:50:54,200
Speaker 1: but you've spoken to intuition quite a bit. You've been like,

1177
00:50:54,239 --> 00:50:56,239
Speaker 1: I just had a feeling. I just kind of knew.

1178
00:50:57,120 --> 00:51:01,040
Speaker 1: That is like your intuition guiding your dama. Yeah, and

1179
00:51:01,400 --> 00:51:05,760
Speaker 1: I think I like and I keep it. Matt is amazing.

1180
00:51:05,800 --> 00:51:07,720
Speaker 4: My boyfriend has no ego, and he's like just staying

1181
00:51:07,760 --> 00:51:09,560
Speaker 4: in a lane law lot because I'll be like this, fuck,

1182
00:51:09,640 --> 00:51:10,680
Speaker 4: Hea just did this.

1183
00:51:10,680 --> 00:51:10,759
Speaker 2: This.

1184
00:51:11,280 --> 00:51:13,520
Speaker 4: It's so hard to keep the blinkers on in this

1185
00:51:13,560 --> 00:51:16,160
Speaker 4: space because like I literally have to.

1186
00:51:16,760 --> 00:51:18,360
Speaker 3: You can mute people now, like you don't have to

1187
00:51:18,400 --> 00:51:19,000
Speaker 3: unfollow them.

1188
00:51:19,000 --> 00:51:21,440
Speaker 4: So there's people out there that like I feel like

1189
00:51:21,480 --> 00:51:25,000
Speaker 4: I have to stay friends with, but they're not really friends.

1190
00:51:25,000 --> 00:51:28,000
Speaker 4: Like it's like, yeah, but you know, I have to

1191
00:51:28,120 --> 00:51:30,799
Speaker 4: like mute them because I'm just like fucking out, Like

1192
00:51:31,520 --> 00:51:33,440
Speaker 4: and look, there are definitely ones I've unfollowed.

1193
00:51:33,440 --> 00:51:34,360
Speaker 3: And I think we've had.

1194
00:51:34,320 --> 00:51:38,080
Speaker 4: Very similar experiences in our you know, when you've done

1195
00:51:38,080 --> 00:51:39,960
Speaker 4: this for so long, there's a lot of people that

1196
00:51:40,040 --> 00:51:42,680
Speaker 4: come and go, and you and I have a very

1197
00:51:43,480 --> 00:51:44,360
Speaker 4: similar alignment.

1198
00:51:44,400 --> 00:51:45,880
Speaker 3: And I think that's why we get along.

1199
00:51:45,640 --> 00:51:48,799
Speaker 4: So well, is that we are a bit of a

1200
00:51:48,960 --> 00:51:52,719
Speaker 4: sucker for a not a sub story, but like we

1201
00:51:52,800 --> 00:51:54,759
Speaker 4: love to help people. Yeah, we don't see it as

1202
00:51:54,840 --> 00:51:57,360
Speaker 4: me helping you prohibits me from opportunity.

1203
00:51:58,080 --> 00:52:01,839
Speaker 3: It's like, you know, my I you know, my I'm

1204
00:52:01,880 --> 00:52:03,520
Speaker 3: your always say, you know, like I'm happy to share

1205
00:52:03,560 --> 00:52:04,279
Speaker 3: contacts with people.

1206
00:52:04,280 --> 00:52:05,920
Speaker 4: I'm happy to put them in touch with people. I'm

1207
00:52:05,920 --> 00:52:08,399
Speaker 4: happy to help them give them that step ahead. And

1208
00:52:08,760 --> 00:52:10,960
Speaker 4: you know, people come and go where they'll be like, oh,

1209
00:52:11,000 --> 00:52:13,840
Speaker 4: you know I really struggle because of this or no

1210
00:52:13,880 --> 00:52:15,560
Speaker 4: one's ever gonna help me because of that or because

1211
00:52:15,600 --> 00:52:19,160
Speaker 4: I don't have a profile. You help them, and you know,

1212
00:52:20,880 --> 00:52:23,439
Speaker 4: you know, five seconds later you don't hear from them

1213
00:52:23,440 --> 00:52:26,720
Speaker 4: because like you're done, you expired, Like you're not useful anymore.

1214
00:52:26,760 --> 00:52:28,480
Speaker 4: You've given all the help you can give, and they're on.

1215
00:52:28,440 --> 00:52:30,000
Speaker 2: To the next. And that's where I always say you.

1216
00:52:30,000 --> 00:52:33,000
Speaker 1: I'm like, you watch people's like mountain rise and then

1217
00:52:33,080 --> 00:52:35,720
Speaker 1: fall when when they're fake. I remember I was friends

1218
00:52:35,760 --> 00:52:38,640
Speaker 1: with someone and they had just become quite famous on

1219
00:52:38,680 --> 00:52:41,880
Speaker 1: a reality TV show years ago, and we were sitting

1220
00:52:42,080 --> 00:52:44,960
Speaker 1: having a coffee together and she said, see that person

1221
00:52:45,040 --> 00:52:48,279
Speaker 1: over there. They just recognized me, And I was like,

1222
00:52:48,719 --> 00:52:50,319
Speaker 1: I went home and I cried, Like I know that

1223
00:52:50,360 --> 00:52:54,040
Speaker 1: sounds like a really dramatic response, but I was like mortified,

1224
00:52:54,239 --> 00:52:55,600
Speaker 1: and I never saw that person again.

1225
00:52:55,719 --> 00:52:56,800
Speaker 2: I was like, I can't.

1226
00:52:56,840 --> 00:53:01,600
Speaker 1: This feels so wrong YEA, to need gratification out of

1227
00:53:01,920 --> 00:53:07,120
Speaker 1: needing to be known by someone, I like, I can't

1228
00:53:07,160 --> 00:53:08,759
Speaker 1: believe how fast it is gone. I have to ask

1229
00:53:08,840 --> 00:53:10,480
Speaker 1: you two more things, just really quickly. It is a

1230
00:53:10,520 --> 00:53:13,879
Speaker 1: nerdy questions though we both are obsessed with the Lion King.

1231
00:53:14,120 --> 00:53:16,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, who was your favorite character in the new remake.

1232
00:53:17,360 --> 00:53:19,040
Speaker 4: Oh look, I would have to say it was more

1233
00:53:19,120 --> 00:53:20,919
Speaker 4: Fussa and it was because it was the.

1234
00:53:20,840 --> 00:53:24,240
Speaker 2: Ora voice, and it just he was just as.

1235
00:53:24,160 --> 00:53:27,359
Speaker 4: Soon as you know he spoke in that first scene

1236
00:53:27,400 --> 00:53:30,440
Speaker 4: with Car and you it's such a distinctive.

1237
00:53:29,880 --> 00:53:32,200
Speaker 2: Voice home, you know.

1238
00:53:32,320 --> 00:53:34,759
Speaker 4: I think that the two movies, you know, seeing it

1239
00:53:34,800 --> 00:53:38,880
Speaker 4: as a child and seeing it as an adult impacted.

1240
00:53:38,320 --> 00:53:39,680
Speaker 2: Me in really different ways.

1241
00:53:40,320 --> 00:53:44,080
Speaker 4: And I had so much appreciation for the cinematography because

1242
00:53:44,080 --> 00:53:49,160
Speaker 4: obviously it's not real, like that's all cgi and just what.

1243
00:53:49,040 --> 00:53:51,280
Speaker 3: Disney does, do you know what I mean? Like Disney

1244
00:53:51,320 --> 00:53:51,840
Speaker 3: as a whole.

1245
00:53:51,920 --> 00:53:54,520
Speaker 4: I love the world that they create because as a

1246
00:53:54,560 --> 00:53:57,080
Speaker 4: young child growing up with not just the Lion King,

1247
00:53:57,120 --> 00:53:59,800
Speaker 4: and it wasn't even just isolated to Disney, because I

1248
00:53:59,800 --> 00:54:03,560
Speaker 4: Lovery Potter as well. Is it creates this world for

1249
00:54:03,840 --> 00:54:09,480
Speaker 4: young minds that I immersed myself in so much that I

1250
00:54:09,520 --> 00:54:12,640
Speaker 4: think it protected me from a lot to do you

1251
00:54:12,680 --> 00:54:13,200
Speaker 4: know what I mean?

1252
00:54:13,280 --> 00:54:14,560
Speaker 2: Like I grew up with a single mom.

1253
00:54:14,600 --> 00:54:17,399
Speaker 4: You know, my dad wasn't around, and so I didn't

1254
00:54:17,400 --> 00:54:21,279
Speaker 4: really grow up in traditional circumstances. And because my mum

1255
00:54:21,320 --> 00:54:24,000
Speaker 4: embraced like my quirkiness and my weirdness and stuff like that,

1256
00:54:24,040 --> 00:54:26,560
Speaker 4: and because I did, like I immersed myself in these

1257
00:54:26,600 --> 00:54:30,000
Speaker 4: worlds that brought me up, do you know what I mean?

1258
00:54:30,200 --> 00:54:31,719
Speaker 4: Like there was such a huge part of my life.

1259
00:54:31,760 --> 00:54:34,560
Speaker 4: And I know that that's not a thing for some people,

1260
00:54:34,920 --> 00:54:35,839
Speaker 4: but for me it was.

1261
00:54:36,280 --> 00:54:39,200
Speaker 1: And is that why they're working with Disneyland is just

1262
00:54:39,239 --> 00:54:43,040
Speaker 1: such a wonderful Like honestly, you're you like, haven't you been?

1263
00:54:43,320 --> 00:54:44,560
Speaker 2: How many have you been?

1264
00:54:44,960 --> 00:54:46,520
Speaker 4: So I've only been to the American ones. I go

1265
00:54:46,560 --> 00:54:48,480
Speaker 4: to Japan in a couple of weeks. But my god,

1266
00:54:48,960 --> 00:54:51,000
Speaker 4: my mom took me to Disneyland as a five year

1267
00:54:51,040 --> 00:54:54,920
Speaker 4: old and recognizing how big that was for a single

1268
00:54:55,000 --> 00:54:59,800
Speaker 4: mum on little to no income, and just how magical

1269
00:54:59,800 --> 00:55:02,279
Speaker 4: that experience was, and then taking my children at the

1270
00:55:02,320 --> 00:55:03,800
Speaker 4: exact same age the same.

1271
00:55:03,640 --> 00:55:05,399
Speaker 2: Disneyland, going on the same run.

1272
00:55:06,320 --> 00:55:09,000
Speaker 4: I walked into Disneyland last year and I cried, Yeah,

1273
00:55:09,040 --> 00:55:11,560
Speaker 4: I cried happy tears that I was just even there.

1274
00:55:11,640 --> 00:55:13,440
Speaker 2: It is literally the happiest place on earth. And you

1275
00:55:13,480 --> 00:55:15,720
Speaker 2: would know this. Please, We're gonna go to Disneyland together.

1276
00:55:15,840 --> 00:55:17,799
Speaker 4: Okay, We're going to La We're gonna go because you

1277
00:55:17,840 --> 00:55:19,280
Speaker 4: can't beat the original Disneyland.

1278
00:55:19,400 --> 00:55:20,080
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1279
00:55:20,080 --> 00:55:23,000
Speaker 4: I went to Disney World, yes, and it is phenomenal,

1280
00:55:23,080 --> 00:55:25,239
Speaker 4: Like it is next level because it's obviously not just

1281
00:55:25,280 --> 00:55:26,200
Speaker 4: the one park.

1282
00:55:26,000 --> 00:55:27,959
Speaker 3: It's the four parks plus everything else.

1283
00:55:28,239 --> 00:55:29,800
Speaker 2: Because you stayed, didn't you stay?

1284
00:55:30,239 --> 00:55:33,000
Speaker 4: I stayed in a Disney resort there, and they have

1285
00:55:33,080 --> 00:55:36,040
Speaker 4: like all little buses running between. And they've got like

1286
00:55:36,320 --> 00:55:38,839
Speaker 4: Magic Kingdom, which is sort of the same as Disneyland,

1287
00:55:38,880 --> 00:55:41,000
Speaker 4: and then they've got Animal Kingdom, which is obviously very

1288
00:55:41,000 --> 00:55:43,440
Speaker 4: similar to like Lion king and stuff like that. I've

1289
00:55:43,440 --> 00:55:45,960
Speaker 4: got Disney Universal Studios, which is where a lot of

1290
00:55:46,000 --> 00:55:47,040
Speaker 4: Pixars based out of.

1291
00:55:47,120 --> 00:55:48,880
Speaker 2: So that's where I went for Toy Story.

1292
00:55:48,640 --> 00:55:51,960
Speaker 1: Four, and I watched all of these stories every morning

1293
00:55:52,000 --> 00:55:53,560
Speaker 1: out bake be like what she done?

1294
00:55:54,000 --> 00:55:54,960
Speaker 2: I honestly.

1295
00:55:55,360 --> 00:55:57,960
Speaker 4: So it's really funny because for two reasons it was

1296
00:55:58,000 --> 00:55:59,759
Speaker 4: actually one of the most amazing things I've ever done

1297
00:55:59,760 --> 00:56:00,000
Speaker 4: in my life.

1298
00:56:00,040 --> 00:56:00,239
Speaker 2: Life.

1299
00:56:00,280 --> 00:56:04,000
Speaker 3: One, I met Tom Hanks and Keanu Reeves goals, like.

1300
00:56:04,360 --> 00:56:07,120
Speaker 2: Tom Hanks is literally the nicest human in the world. Yeah,

1301
00:56:07,200 --> 00:56:09,400
Speaker 2: he honestly was just amazing.

1302
00:56:09,560 --> 00:56:12,400
Speaker 4: Like there's a video on the Walt Disney Facebook page

1303
00:56:12,400 --> 00:56:14,759
Speaker 4: of my reaction when he walks out, really and I

1304
00:56:14,760 --> 00:56:15,160
Speaker 4: look like.

1305
00:56:15,080 --> 00:56:15,879
Speaker 3: A twelve year old.

1306
00:56:15,960 --> 00:56:18,600
Speaker 2: I'm just like, oh God, because.

1307
00:56:19,960 --> 00:56:21,200
Speaker 4: And I grew up with that and up with it,

1308
00:56:21,200 --> 00:56:24,160
Speaker 4: but also like Forest Gum, Yeah, you know, the Apollo

1309
00:56:24,200 --> 00:56:26,400
Speaker 4: movie and all that kind of stuff, like he's just

1310
00:56:26,400 --> 00:56:30,040
Speaker 4: a phenomenon Philadelphia, all those movies as such, corner.

1311
00:56:29,840 --> 00:56:31,719
Speaker 2: Like cornerstone content in my life.

1312
00:56:32,080 --> 00:56:34,719
Speaker 4: But going there by myself, so like, my kids are

1313
00:56:34,719 --> 00:56:37,160
Speaker 4: relatively young, and I think anyone who didn't know me

1314
00:56:37,200 --> 00:56:39,480
Speaker 4: would be like, that's fucking weird. She went to Disneyland

1315
00:56:39,520 --> 00:56:41,200
Speaker 4: without her kids, But anyone who knew me, it was

1316
00:56:41,200 --> 00:56:44,360
Speaker 4: like that makes sense, like because I have such a

1317
00:56:44,360 --> 00:56:46,960
Speaker 4: connection to it that I now share with my children.

1318
00:56:47,560 --> 00:56:51,480
Speaker 4: But going on that holiday by myself, I didn't realize

1319
00:56:51,480 --> 00:56:53,360
Speaker 4: it was one of the best things for me, especially

1320
00:56:53,400 --> 00:56:56,319
Speaker 4: this year and everything I've been through with Saturn and

1321
00:56:56,400 --> 00:57:01,640
Speaker 4: everything else, because I felt like I was like dating myself,

1322
00:57:01,680 --> 00:57:01,920
Speaker 4: do you know.

1323
00:57:01,920 --> 00:57:02,359
Speaker 2: What I mean?

1324
00:57:02,440 --> 00:57:05,200
Speaker 3: Like people like, didn't you find it weird being by yourself?

1325
00:57:05,200 --> 00:57:06,720
Speaker 3: I'm like, Oh, it's the best.

1326
00:57:06,760 --> 00:57:09,839
Speaker 4: I spent like two three days in that park by myself,

1327
00:57:10,400 --> 00:57:13,200
Speaker 4: going on rides by myself, like just doing whatever I

1328
00:57:13,200 --> 00:57:17,680
Speaker 4: wanted by myself, really enjoying my own company and just

1329
00:57:17,760 --> 00:57:19,920
Speaker 4: being like I'm not that fucking bad to hang out with,

1330
00:57:20,200 --> 00:57:21,560
Speaker 4: like do you know what I mean?

1331
00:57:21,680 --> 00:57:22,760
Speaker 2: Like it was so good.

1332
00:57:22,840 --> 00:57:25,240
Speaker 4: So I'm very grateful to Disney for that experience because

1333
00:57:25,280 --> 00:57:28,240
Speaker 4: it was not just the going for Toy story, which

1334
00:57:28,280 --> 00:57:33,040
Speaker 4: was fucking amazing, but and Americans like, well, it's not

1335
00:57:33,080 --> 00:57:36,000
Speaker 4: just Americans, Australians like, there's a lot of took poppy

1336
00:57:36,040 --> 00:57:38,760
Speaker 4: in Australia and I feel like it was really.

1337
00:57:38,600 --> 00:57:40,560
Speaker 3: Good to get out of fucking fish pond.

1338
00:57:40,840 --> 00:57:44,320
Speaker 4: Americans would love you too, because you are you are

1339
00:57:44,360 --> 00:57:48,600
Speaker 4: intrinsically Australian and like they just didn't see me as

1340
00:57:48,600 --> 00:57:52,880
Speaker 4: competition And it doesn't matter how big how small. Everyone

1341
00:57:53,080 --> 00:57:56,960
Speaker 4: just was like, you know, like they was just amazing,

1342
00:57:57,040 --> 00:57:58,520
Speaker 4: you know, and then you know they were so you know,

1343
00:57:58,560 --> 00:58:00,680
Speaker 4: they didn't see it as like, oh he's gonna fucking

1344
00:58:00,680 --> 00:58:01,680
Speaker 4: cut out bread.

1345
00:58:01,520 --> 00:58:04,880
Speaker 1: Or no, there's so much more opportunity there though. There

1346
00:58:04,920 --> 00:58:05,640
Speaker 1: it is such.

1347
00:58:05,440 --> 00:58:06,240
Speaker 2: A bigger bond.

1348
00:58:06,760 --> 00:58:07,320
Speaker 3: Definitely.

1349
00:58:07,520 --> 00:58:09,720
Speaker 2: Oh my godness, I'm holding you to our Disneyland date.

1350
00:58:11,320 --> 00:58:13,640
Speaker 2: My favorite ride was the Indiana Jones Ride. What's your

1351
00:58:13,640 --> 00:58:15,800
Speaker 2: favorite ride? Oh? And Peter pan Oh.

1352
00:58:15,640 --> 00:58:17,760
Speaker 3: I do love, yeah, fight a favorite, that one's good.

1353
00:58:19,000 --> 00:58:22,000
Speaker 2: Have you been on Souren No? Oh my god, it's

1354
00:58:22,000 --> 00:58:23,800
Speaker 2: a fucking best. It's so cool.

1355
00:58:23,840 --> 00:58:26,560
Speaker 4: So it's in so I've only been on it at

1356
00:58:26,840 --> 00:58:30,040
Speaker 4: disney World. Okay, I don't think they have one at Disneyland,

1357
00:58:30,040 --> 00:58:31,880
Speaker 4: but they did just put one in at Disneyland Japan.

1358
00:58:32,480 --> 00:58:34,480
Speaker 4: So you go on it and it's like you are

1359
00:58:34,520 --> 00:58:36,800
Speaker 4: on like a ride through all these different parts of

1360
00:58:36,840 --> 00:58:39,920
Speaker 4: the world. Oh, it's really magical and like you've got

1361
00:58:39,920 --> 00:58:41,280
Speaker 4: this really big screen.

1362
00:58:43,320 --> 00:58:44,640
Speaker 3: I love the parts of the Caribbean.

1363
00:58:44,720 --> 00:58:46,560
Speaker 4: That was like, oh my god, yes, that's amazing. But

1364
00:58:46,560 --> 00:58:49,200
Speaker 4: I'm a Johnny Depp fan too. Apparently one time and

1365
00:58:49,280 --> 00:58:51,440
Speaker 4: Disney didn't even know he did it, but during the

1366
00:58:51,480 --> 00:58:53,520
Speaker 4: third movie coming out, he went, you know how, there's

1367
00:58:53,600 --> 00:58:56,080
Speaker 4: him there. He went and sat there for like half

1368
00:58:56,120 --> 00:58:59,200
Speaker 4: a day and they didn't fucking know. Amazing, and so

1369
00:58:59,400 --> 00:59:00,960
Speaker 4: I was like that one of the best thing ever,

1370
00:59:01,040 --> 00:59:03,280
Speaker 4: Like Johnny Dep's just like sitting there like pretending to

1371
00:59:03,360 --> 00:59:03,840
Speaker 4: be like.

1372
00:59:03,760 --> 00:59:04,840
Speaker 2: The fake Johnny Depp.

1373
00:59:05,560 --> 00:59:08,080
Speaker 4: M look, I would say that I have a really

1374
00:59:08,080 --> 00:59:09,720
Speaker 4: sort of like I know that it's like the most

1375
00:59:09,800 --> 00:59:12,120
Speaker 4: boring ride ever, but it's a small world up.

1376
00:59:12,200 --> 00:59:13,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, because no, I'm incredible.

1377
00:59:13,920 --> 00:59:15,480
Speaker 4: When my me and my mom went on it and

1378
00:59:15,520 --> 00:59:17,440
Speaker 4: she had like the old school video camera. She has

1379
00:59:17,560 --> 00:59:19,680
Speaker 4: video of her video on it for like twenty minutes,

1380
00:59:19,720 --> 00:59:21,560
Speaker 4: and then turning to the camera and being like, well.

1381
00:59:21,400 --> 00:59:23,600
Speaker 2: It's clearly not a small world after all, because.

1382
00:59:23,360 --> 00:59:24,800
Speaker 3: His ride's been going for twenty minutes.

1383
00:59:24,880 --> 00:59:25,840
Speaker 2: You have to find that video.

1384
00:59:26,080 --> 00:59:29,240
Speaker 4: Yeah, I know, seriously beyond VHS or something, of course,

1385
00:59:29,320 --> 00:59:31,440
Speaker 4: but you can still and the tea cuts because I

1386
00:59:31,480 --> 00:59:34,360
Speaker 4: remember them from when I was middle of course, I

1387
00:59:34,360 --> 00:59:36,840
Speaker 4: did go on Space Love Space Mount Me too.

1388
00:59:37,320 --> 00:59:37,680
Speaker 2: Loved it.

1389
00:59:37,720 --> 00:59:41,040
Speaker 4: Didn't realize it was a fucking roller coaster in the dark.

1390
00:59:41,160 --> 00:59:42,600
Speaker 4: So I get on it and it sort of goes

1391
00:59:42,600 --> 00:59:45,560
Speaker 4: and I'm like, the fuck is this? But that was

1392
00:59:45,560 --> 00:59:47,960
Speaker 4: because obviously I couldn't go on all those rides when

1393
00:59:47,960 --> 00:59:49,960
Speaker 4: I had my kids the first time, so when I

1394
00:59:50,120 --> 00:59:52,120
Speaker 4: on a lot of those rides the second time. So

1395
00:59:52,440 --> 00:59:55,480
Speaker 4: Toy story Land at Disney World, they've got the Slinky

1396
00:59:55,520 --> 00:59:56,320
Speaker 4: Dog roller coaster.

1397
00:59:56,400 --> 00:59:58,320
Speaker 2: And I'm not a roller coaster but that was awesome.

1398
00:59:58,320 --> 00:59:59,160
Speaker 3: But that was awesome.

1399
00:59:59,240 --> 00:59:59,919
Speaker 2: That was really cool.

1400
01:00:00,200 --> 01:00:02,000
Speaker 4: Just did the in credit coster and he said it

1401
01:00:02,040 --> 01:00:03,840
Speaker 4: was fucking insane, amazing.

1402
01:00:04,560 --> 01:00:06,959
Speaker 2: I've got to kind of get the balls for that one.

1403
01:00:07,120 --> 01:00:08,360
Speaker 3: So I'll do it with.

1404
01:00:08,320 --> 01:00:09,440
Speaker 2: You one day. Yeah, we'll do it.

1405
01:00:09,480 --> 01:00:11,800
Speaker 4: I love I'm like, I reckon that we should do

1406
01:00:11,840 --> 01:00:14,000
Speaker 4: the La one because it's my favorite.

1407
01:00:14,120 --> 01:00:17,959
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's so cheap to get there. Yeah. Thanks.

1408
01:00:19,240 --> 01:00:24,640
Speaker 1: Okay, So I just want to say one massive thank you,

1409
01:00:25,360 --> 01:00:28,000
Speaker 1: not just for what you do, because that's awesome and

1410
01:00:28,040 --> 01:00:31,120
Speaker 1: we've obviously established that established that today, but more just

1411
01:00:31,160 --> 01:00:33,439
Speaker 1: for like owning who you are. And I think it's

1412
01:00:33,480 --> 01:00:38,680
Speaker 1: so friggin rare. And I am loved that you did

1413
01:00:38,760 --> 01:00:42,040
Speaker 1: a TV interview about I think it was about Bushi's

1414
01:00:42,120 --> 01:00:44,840
Speaker 1: and the Lionking, but you wore linking T shirt. I

1415
01:00:44,880 --> 01:00:47,720
Speaker 1: was like, this girl is my kind of human.

1416
01:00:47,880 --> 01:00:50,320
Speaker 3: I wore a themed out fit in Disneyland every day too.

1417
01:00:50,600 --> 01:00:51,360
Speaker 2: I know, I.

1418
01:00:51,360 --> 01:00:55,520
Speaker 4: Watched every story and you had many mouses, so many

1419
01:00:55,600 --> 01:00:57,080
Speaker 4: ears too.

1420
01:00:57,080 --> 01:00:57,600
Speaker 2: I love it.

1421
01:00:57,880 --> 01:00:59,680
Speaker 4: And I just want to thank you for being the

1422
01:00:59,680 --> 01:01:02,200
Speaker 4: world's biggest gooba with me, because that's it.

1423
01:01:02,640 --> 01:01:04,280
Speaker 2: We literally do goobers, aren't we.

1424
01:01:04,800 --> 01:01:07,000
Speaker 1: Every time we see each other, even though there's gaps

1425
01:01:07,040 --> 01:01:08,760
Speaker 1: between it, we're like, oh, my fucking god, guess what

1426
01:01:08,840 --> 01:01:09,720
Speaker 1: fucking happened yesterday?

1427
01:01:09,840 --> 01:01:11,080
Speaker 2: I know nothing, And.

1428
01:01:11,120 --> 01:01:12,720
Speaker 4: I love that we're the kind of friends that, even

1429
01:01:12,720 --> 01:01:14,360
Speaker 4: though we don't see each other, because that's a big

1430
01:01:14,440 --> 01:01:15,880
Speaker 4: part of like friendship, going back.

1431
01:01:15,760 --> 01:01:18,280
Speaker 2: To relationships, and that is that you don't have to

1432
01:01:18,280 --> 01:01:20,720
Speaker 2: be in each other's pockets. It's just got to be real,

1433
01:01:20,840 --> 01:01:21,840
Speaker 2: and you know you don't.

1434
01:01:22,000 --> 01:01:24,200
Speaker 4: Just because you're friends with one person doesn't mean you've

1435
01:01:24,160 --> 01:01:25,480
Speaker 4: got to be friends with a group of people.

1436
01:01:26,240 --> 01:01:28,920
Speaker 2: Like life's too short. Yeah, if you're not friends with

1437
01:01:28,920 --> 01:01:30,600
Speaker 2: your friends from high school, fucking who cares?

1438
01:01:30,840 --> 01:01:32,800
Speaker 4: If you can only count on one hand how many

1439
01:01:32,960 --> 01:01:35,040
Speaker 4: good friends you have that you trust. My mum taught

1440
01:01:35,040 --> 01:01:36,800
Speaker 4: me this when I was younger, when I thought that

1441
01:01:36,800 --> 01:01:38,800
Speaker 4: having hundreds of friends on Facebook was important.

1442
01:01:39,120 --> 01:01:39,600
Speaker 2: If you can.

1443
01:01:39,600 --> 01:01:43,480
Speaker 4: Count five people on one hand in your life that

1444
01:01:43,520 --> 01:01:46,320
Speaker 4: you care about and that you trust, your kicking goals.

1445
01:01:46,360 --> 01:01:48,080
Speaker 2: You see. Your mom's a legend. Do you know what

1446
01:01:48,120 --> 01:01:49,120
Speaker 2: I learned last night?

1447
01:01:49,160 --> 01:01:52,200
Speaker 1: I do acting school, and someone was saying a monologue

1448
01:01:52,240 --> 01:01:55,640
Speaker 1: and they said, we've probably got fifty to sixty years

1449
01:01:55,720 --> 01:01:58,160
Speaker 1: left of our life. Like life is short. That is

1450
01:01:58,280 --> 01:02:02,160
Speaker 1: only two thousand, five hundred weekends, so do not fucking

1451
01:02:02,200 --> 01:02:06,080
Speaker 1: waste them? How crazy? Like life is short? Like go

1452
01:02:06,120 --> 01:02:09,640
Speaker 1: to every Disneyland, mate, take the trips, you know, like,

1453
01:02:10,400 --> 01:02:11,560
Speaker 1: soak up every part.

1454
01:02:11,400 --> 01:02:13,200
Speaker 2: Of your about the superficials.

1455
01:02:13,320 --> 01:02:15,600
Speaker 4: No, you're in my house right now. Like we've been

1456
01:02:15,600 --> 01:02:16,800
Speaker 4: renovating for six years.

1457
01:02:17,040 --> 01:02:18,960
Speaker 2: It's a pretty sick house, might I ask? And we

1458
01:02:19,200 --> 01:02:20,480
Speaker 2: just do it as we can afford it.

1459
01:02:20,480 --> 01:02:23,440
Speaker 4: We don't take out loans, Like I've had this dining

1460
01:02:23,480 --> 01:02:26,240
Speaker 4: table since before we moved in here, Like I have

1461
01:02:26,360 --> 01:02:29,400
Speaker 4: checks in there that don't even have handles anymore. That

1462
01:02:29,520 --> 01:02:32,240
Speaker 4: came from my uncle, like, you know, just to help

1463
01:02:32,320 --> 01:02:34,240
Speaker 4: us out when we moved out. Because I'm like, it

1464
01:02:34,280 --> 01:02:36,160
Speaker 4: still does what it needs to do, the potsta work.

1465
01:02:37,040 --> 01:02:39,440
Speaker 4: Don't fucking feel like you have to do it for

1466
01:02:39,480 --> 01:02:42,320
Speaker 4: anyone else. Don't you do it for the ground to

1467
01:02:42,320 --> 01:02:44,360
Speaker 4: do it for you. Yeah, And like I.

1468
01:02:44,280 --> 01:02:46,400
Speaker 2: Said, I never fucking wedding because I prefer to travel.

1469
01:02:46,680 --> 01:02:48,320
Speaker 2: I love that. I love that.

1470
01:02:48,680 --> 01:02:51,040
Speaker 1: I think your message is really clear. It's like, just

1471
01:02:51,160 --> 01:02:54,400
Speaker 1: fucking figure out who you are, whether that be with therapy,

1472
01:02:54,720 --> 01:02:56,520
Speaker 1: be around cool fucking people while you're doing it.

1473
01:02:56,600 --> 01:02:58,920
Speaker 4: Oh, that's a huge one. You've got to be around

1474
01:02:58,960 --> 01:03:02,160
Speaker 4: people that not just champion you, though, but.

1475
01:03:02,160 --> 01:03:04,960
Speaker 2: Also challenge you. Absolutely. I think that's critical.

1476
01:03:04,960 --> 01:03:08,240
Speaker 4: When I think of all my best friends, they are

1477
01:03:08,640 --> 01:03:11,040
Speaker 4: happy to sit in the glory with me, but They're

1478
01:03:11,080 --> 01:03:13,280
Speaker 4: happy to fucking backhand me and tell me when I'm

1479
01:03:13,320 --> 01:03:15,560
Speaker 4: out of line as well. That's perfect because you can't

1480
01:03:15,600 --> 01:03:17,360
Speaker 4: just have people telling you how wonderful you are all

1481
01:03:17,360 --> 01:03:17,760
Speaker 4: the time.

1482
01:03:18,320 --> 01:03:21,160
Speaker 2: So I'm going to tell you are very wonderful.

1483
01:03:22,840 --> 01:03:26,320
Speaker 4: But no, no, no, and I've got to wrap up this podcast,

1484
01:03:26,640 --> 01:03:29,920
Speaker 4: not at all, and i want, I just want to

1485
01:03:29,960 --> 01:03:31,320
Speaker 4: say thank you for being the real deal.

1486
01:03:31,680 --> 01:03:32,760
Speaker 2: It's been such an honor.

1487
01:03:32,920 --> 01:03:34,120
Speaker 3: So you're alled you.

1488
01:03:34,440 --> 01:03:37,160
Speaker 2: I love you, I love you. It's a love it.

1489
01:03:40,840 --> 01:03:46,480
Speaker 1: That's a wrap on another episode of Fearlessly Failing. As always,

1490
01:03:46,640 --> 01:03:50,000
Speaker 1: thank you to our guests, and let's continue the conversation

1491
01:03:50,160 --> 01:03:51,080
Speaker 1: on Instagram.

1492
01:03:51,560 --> 01:03:53,720
Speaker 2: I'm at Yamo Lola Berry.

1493
01:03:54,400 --> 01:03:58,560
Speaker 1: This potty my word for podcast is available on all

1494
01:03:58,640 --> 01:04:02,640
Speaker 1: streaming platforms. I'd love it if you could subscribe, write

1495
01:04:02,680 --> 01:04:05,439
Speaker 1: and comment, and of course spread the love.