WEBVTT - Just take the f*cking photo !

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<v Speaker 1>I got spotted last Saturday. Oh for the first time

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<v Speaker 1>we got spotted.

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<v Speaker 2>We've been spotted before, so this is the second spotting.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you remember we were going to the Super Bowl?

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<v Speaker 1>Oh yeah, and a lady was like, hey, hey, love

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<v Speaker 1>you as you Matt Or is it the time when

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<v Speaker 1>I got spotted and then you got you're verbally abused?

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<v Speaker 2>Do you want to tell that story? Let me do

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<v Speaker 2>the intro first, and then you can tell that story

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<v Speaker 2>if you want.

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<v Speaker 3>Okay, Yeah, Welcome to two Dodding Dads.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm Mattie Jay and I'm Ash. This is a podcast

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<v Speaker 1>that is all about parenting. It's the good, the bad,

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<v Speaker 1>and the bad, I mean, and the related It's all bad,

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<v Speaker 1>all right and more bad. There are many experts out

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<v Speaker 1>there in the world of parenting, many other experts, not us.

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<v Speaker 1>We are far from experts. If you're coming for advice,

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<v Speaker 1>to stop it, stop it right now. This is your

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<v Speaker 1>first time. There's no advice here. You've been warned. And

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<v Speaker 1>before I forget.

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<v Speaker 2>We ran a competition on our socials to win two

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<v Speaker 2>brand new baby Beyond Harmony carriers, and I'm stoked to

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<v Speaker 2>say that we have a winner. It is Sarah Arts.

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<v Speaker 2>Congratulations will be in touch to send out to brand

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<v Speaker 2>new carriers to you asap ash. Yes, I didn't think

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<v Speaker 2>we'd tell the story, but you can tell it if

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<v Speaker 2>you like.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, So we were just talking about Matt got spotted.

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<v Speaker 1>I got spotted. It was at the market, A two

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<v Speaker 1>doting dad's spotty. Yes, he just said, he just said dad,

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<v Speaker 1>which is great because normally I only get spotted by

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<v Speaker 1>the female. Did you joke him off? Afterward? I was like,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm here, You've deserved it, reach around on you and

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<v Speaker 1>he just yelled out and said, hey, two doting dads.

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<v Speaker 1>And before I was like, I was ready for a

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<v Speaker 1>full blown convo. Let's go want to That's all he

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<v Speaker 1>wanted And I was there with lube in one hand, like,

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<v Speaker 1>what about I have said that if someone leaves us

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<v Speaker 1>a review or we would jerk them on. Would Yeah, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>it's a fair trait, but I mean, I know it's

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<v Speaker 1>all it's nice and new for you to be spotted

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<v Speaker 1>or recognized somewhat used to it. So just like the

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<v Speaker 1>other day, for those of you who weren't there, which

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<v Speaker 1>is all of you listening, Matt and I were at

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<v Speaker 1>our producer Keisha's thirtieth birthday, Happy birthday. Cache at it

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<v Speaker 1>and we had a lovely lunch. We did have a

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<v Speaker 1>lovely lunch of beer, yes, and some taco taco things,

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<v Speaker 1>and it was a bit of a weird met I

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<v Speaker 1>said it was like being in a Chinese man's basement

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<v Speaker 1>eating Mexican food. That's kind of the theme.

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<v Speaker 2>It was quite sure what cuisine it wanted to be,

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<v Speaker 2>but it was like a bottomless margaritas.

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<v Speaker 1>They do this thing, it's called fusion, so now they

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<v Speaker 1>could just like I fuse everything together. It's like when

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<v Speaker 1>I buy a cheeseburger and mc nuggets and I put

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<v Speaker 1>mc nuggets on the cheeseburg fusure. We had a lovely

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<v Speaker 1>lunch and then as we're getting up to leave, a

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<v Speaker 1>table of young ladies and their partners said to me, oh,

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<v Speaker 1>can we get a photo with you me specifically very enthusiastic.

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<v Speaker 1>They just I think it was did you get your

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<v Speaker 1>shirt grabbed? They grab your shirt or is.

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<v Speaker 2>It an arm pul They were scurrying towards it to

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<v Speaker 2>stop you when you desperate?

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, no, they weren't desperate. It was a mister. They

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<v Speaker 1>asked if they could take MAT's Oh take the phone.

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<v Speaker 2>Hang on hang on, can I just just chime in

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<v Speaker 2>for a second. They were so enthusiastic, they were so

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<v Speaker 2>starstruck by seeing ash Aka jam pikelets in the flesh.

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<v Speaker 2>There was like a moment of like, you know, they

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<v Speaker 2>almost couldn't get the words. Look, and I saw it,

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<v Speaker 2>and I thought, you know what, I'll be the nice guy.

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<v Speaker 1>And I said, excuse me? Would I thought? You said,

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<v Speaker 1>you're going to let me tell this it?

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<v Speaker 2>Would you like me to take a photo? That's what

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<v Speaker 2>I said, nice guy, Nice guy?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, in which they said, yeah, of course that'd be great. Look,

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<v Speaker 1>they did have a they had a belly full of piss,

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<v Speaker 1>let's be honest, okay, And it was bottom as Marca.

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<v Speaker 1>Everyone was well lubricated in the venture. Yeah. And then

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<v Speaker 1>I grabbed the phone. Yeah, okay, you were already kneeling down.

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<v Speaker 1>I was sitting. But it was funny. They also had that,

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<v Speaker 1>Remember they had the tablecloths over there to imitate how

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<v Speaker 1>I do my content?

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, And I simply said, because it was you know

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<v Speaker 2>we're talking about it was like a basement. It was

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<v Speaker 2>very poorly lit. It was very dark, okay, And I

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<v Speaker 2>looked through the leno first.

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<v Speaker 1>You're also slightly hurt in your eyes. She looked at

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<v Speaker 1>me and she's like listening. He was, don't reverse the

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<v Speaker 1>camera and take a bloody photo of yourself, take a

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<v Speaker 1>fucking photo of yourself. And she's like, don't do it.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, the old gag of like yeah, and I thought,

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<v Speaker 2>never entered.

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<v Speaker 1>My car, and now you're gonna do it.

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<v Speaker 2>And then I said, I looked through the camera like

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<v Speaker 2>screen and it was so dark, and I said, do

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<v Speaker 2>you want to flash or no flash?

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<v Speaker 1>That's right, A very simple question in which because some.

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<v Speaker 2>People are very like, yeah I flash. Some people all

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<v Speaker 2>for the flash, and so I just wanted to you know.

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<v Speaker 1>You were just trying to be a good photographer. What

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<v Speaker 1>was the response. You looked at me, dead in the

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<v Speaker 1>eye and said, just take the fucking photo. And look, honestly,

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<v Speaker 1>it was very aggressive, but you did take it a

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<v Speaker 1>little bit too. You didn't have a diva moment, Matt.

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<v Speaker 1>You stormed off. You stormed off, and I was like no.

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, he's hurt. Yeah, you were gutted, and honestly,

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<v Speaker 1>you weren't very happy about it, and you dev it

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<v Speaker 1>out the door. I threw the phone back and I said,

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<v Speaker 1>you take the fucking photo, which we get it. You

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<v Speaker 1>were hurt. How do you want me to respond? I

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<v Speaker 1>just want you.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm like helping someone out. It's like if you're changing

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<v Speaker 2>someone's car tire that's flat, and you're.

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<v Speaker 1>Like, you're probably getting paid for that.

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<v Speaker 2>No, if you're given your time and you're like, hey,

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<v Speaker 2>do you want is the spare in the trunk?

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<v Speaker 1>Just moment you change the fucking tire?

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<v Speaker 2>Like that's like, hey, I don't have to, I'm not

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<v Speaker 2>a photographer. You did, I could be enjoying.

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<v Speaker 1>I was even calling you a diva at the time,

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<v Speaker 1>just to really rough this. Just sal you know where

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<v Speaker 1>your fucking allegiance lies. Anyway, And you saw you coaxed

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<v Speaker 1>your back over. You were like, he's always like this.

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<v Speaker 1>That's after a few drinks, it gets like No. I

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<v Speaker 1>was like, oh, look, he's really upset that you didn't

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<v Speaker 1>recognize him and then made him take the voter. So

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<v Speaker 1>I came back. You came back after you had after

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<v Speaker 1>you threw your fucking toys out of the cot. You

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<v Speaker 1>came back, took me idiocre photo, and then we moved

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<v Speaker 1>on with our lives. Look, honestly, they did say they're

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<v Speaker 1>from the Central coast and they're like, fuy, Yeah, they

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<v Speaker 1>were pretty. They were pretty lit up.

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<v Speaker 2>So I think her friend knew that the one who

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<v Speaker 2>had said those.

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<v Speaker 1>Who was too much? It was too much. Now. We

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<v Speaker 1>all got together later and were like, how about Matt

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<v Speaker 1>just worm off like a diva. You're going to be

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<v Speaker 1>just a punching bag for people. Yes, spear pin cushion,

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<v Speaker 1>that's who you need to be, or knock her out.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm just whushka.

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<v Speaker 2>I did throw the phone back with like like a mallet,

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<v Speaker 2>pitch mallet.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm glad it made you happy. It did. It made

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<v Speaker 1>me really happy because it was really really funny.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, you're a sensitive guy, and so when when

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<v Speaker 2>you're taking a photo and one of my fans is like,

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<v Speaker 2>just take the fucking photo.

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<v Speaker 1>I'll do as I'm told.

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<v Speaker 2>Anyway, Anyway, how are you You've had a stress? We

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<v Speaker 2>both had stress, morning Mate.

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<v Speaker 1>Karma has really really really hit me today. So in

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<v Speaker 1>the last episode we spoke about when I do the

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<v Speaker 1>kidney drop off, and I'm like, your problem got a

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<v Speaker 1>little bit rins from a few child to educators. Get

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<v Speaker 1>out of yourself. So yes, it's karma, yeah, and I'll

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<v Speaker 1>copy it. I'll cop it on the chin. I'm not

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<v Speaker 1>going to send someone a rude comment about it, but yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I feel like this morning I had to do drop off.

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<v Speaker 1>My wife had to go to work early this morning,

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<v Speaker 1>which is fine, she's allowed to. She's a powerful woman. Apparently,

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<v Speaker 1>well said thank you, Just fucking shut up and listen

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<v Speaker 1>and just melt down. After meltdown, sobbing. Who was it

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<v Speaker 1>which Oscar? So? Oscar knows what day it is. Macy

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<v Speaker 1>doesn't know what's going on. She's like, it's light outside

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<v Speaker 1>or it's dark outside. That's as much as she knows.

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<v Speaker 1>She was okay, but she was feeding off his energy.

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<v Speaker 1>So this morning woke up, we're all in my bed. Whatever,

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<v Speaker 1>mum's gotta go go instant meltdown. Now, Oscar goes to

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<v Speaker 1>two kindys. One he likes, when he does not like

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<v Speaker 1>so much because he's getting a little bit older and

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<v Speaker 1>he likes the older one. Goes back to that one.

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<v Speaker 1>The one he doesn't like. Is that just a Wednesday

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<v Speaker 1>Wednesday Thursday? Yeah, it's good for me, bad for him.

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<v Speaker 1>And he just was uncontrollably sobbing. Oh it was different,

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<v Speaker 1>and I was like, this is payback. I was trying

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<v Speaker 1>to reason with him because I have Macy off on Thursdays.

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<v Speaker 1>And I was like, look tomorrow, like my dad's down,

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<v Speaker 1>my mom's down. I was like, well, you can come

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<v Speaker 1>with us tomorrow. You don't have to go tomorrow, but

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<v Speaker 1>we just need to get done today because I've got

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<v Speaker 1>too much to do. A great offer. Yeah yeah, And

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<v Speaker 1>he was like yeah for about one second and then

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<v Speaker 1>he's just sobbing everything. Literally. I was like, what do

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<v Speaker 1>you want for breakfast? Rice bubbles? So he's eating rice

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<v Speaker 1>pubbles that little table there, sobbing into his life.

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<v Speaker 2>He was like like command what he got broken up with?

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<v Speaker 1>And then Macy's sitting acrost with him, and Macy goes

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<v Speaker 1>she's at the moment she's really into doing thumbs up,

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<v Speaker 1>and she goes big thumb up, but she does love

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<v Speaker 1>this like the back of the hand towards the person.

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<v Speaker 1>That's the right way to do it. That's it. And

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<v Speaker 1>he just was like, I don't want a thumbs up.

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<v Speaker 1>But I was just like, oh my god. Anyway, I

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<v Speaker 1>had to take a few deep breaths and I said, Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>it's all right, it's okay. Trying to be patient but

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<v Speaker 1>also getting very frustrated, and because it's.

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<v Speaker 2>Just every everything, every mouthful is a punished And I

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<v Speaker 2>was like, okay, let's go, let's all go upstairs, let's

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<v Speaker 2>go get dressed together.

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<v Speaker 1>It's nice up there, the sun's out on the balcony there,

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<v Speaker 1>into a nicer environment. She's still like like I'm good,

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<v Speaker 1>but then she was sort of getting upset because he

0:11:08.640 --> 0:11:11.360
<v Speaker 1>was getting upset and I was getting upset. And then

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, it's going to be warm today, and

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, just put some shorts on, and he

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<v Speaker 1>was like, okay, no worries, and then he's just like

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<v Speaker 1>putting a sock on, so slow, sobbing like morning pretty much.

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<v Speaker 1>Did you want to FaceTime April just to nah? Because

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<v Speaker 1>she was on the bas I did ring her and

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<v Speaker 1>I was.

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<v Speaker 2>Like, because sometimes you want to make him know what

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<v Speaker 2>you're dealing with.

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, I don't know what to do. Like

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<v Speaker 1>I was nearly going to be like, he's going to

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<v Speaker 1>have to be here today because he was just so distraught,

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<v Speaker 1>which I felt really bad about, but I just had

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<v Speaker 1>too much on today. April was not here anyway, So

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<v Speaker 1>we came back downstairs and he's like, oh, I'm cold.

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, okay, well, why don't you go and

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<v Speaker 1>put some pants on? Then? If you do, I didn't

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<v Speaker 1>make himself through the cold. Like this was the eighties

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<v Speaker 1>or fifties, they'd be like, suck it up, like suck

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<v Speaker 1>it up. It was in the country, suck it up,

0:12:06.120 --> 0:12:08.960
<v Speaker 1>go and melt the cows. He went upstairs and I

0:12:09.080 --> 0:12:12.079
<v Speaker 1>was like cleaning up a little bit. Macy's having a

0:12:12.240 --> 0:12:14.920
<v Speaker 1>sulk about something or whatever. I was like, oh, like,

0:12:15.000 --> 0:12:18.600
<v Speaker 1>you're right, buddy, trying to just keep my tone nice, gentle,

0:12:19.920 --> 0:12:22.240
<v Speaker 1>Oh are you okay, buddy? Like, because I also need

0:12:22.240 --> 0:12:23.240
<v Speaker 1>to get them out of the door.

0:12:23.080 --> 0:12:25.560
<v Speaker 2>Because when they were in that kind of mood, as

0:12:25.600 --> 0:12:27.960
<v Speaker 2>soon as you raise your voice, just like a smith,

0:12:28.080 --> 0:12:31.520
<v Speaker 2>just as soon as like any change in tone sets

0:12:31.559 --> 0:12:32.080
<v Speaker 2>them off again.

0:12:32.160 --> 0:12:35.040
<v Speaker 1>And he was already like the poor kid, like his

0:12:35.200 --> 0:12:37.480
<v Speaker 1>eyes like he hadn't slept in days because he just

0:12:37.600 --> 0:12:41.040
<v Speaker 1>cried for an hour straight, sobbed like I felt terrible.

0:12:41.040 --> 0:12:43.760
<v Speaker 1>But anyway, I was like, oh, like, are you okay, buddy,

0:12:43.840 --> 0:12:46.760
<v Speaker 1>like calling out up the stairs and he's like no.

0:12:47.440 --> 0:12:51.360
<v Speaker 1>I was like, oh my god, what what is it?

0:12:51.400 --> 0:12:53.360
<v Speaker 1>And he was like, I can't get my feet through

0:12:53.360 --> 0:12:56.719
<v Speaker 1>the holes. I walk upstairs and he's trying to put

0:12:56.760 --> 0:13:01.600
<v Speaker 1>tracksuit pants on with his shoes still and his feet

0:13:02.240 --> 0:13:05.040
<v Speaker 1>as stuck in the bottom bit like that. The rubbers

0:13:05.120 --> 0:13:07.840
<v Speaker 1>just caught onto the cuff of the pant and he

0:13:07.920 --> 0:13:18.880
<v Speaker 1>is just full. He's wailing at this point, and I

0:13:19.440 --> 0:13:25.280
<v Speaker 1>fuck anyway, I'm up there, fixed him up, promised him

0:13:25.559 --> 0:13:29.079
<v Speaker 1>heap chocolate, and Macy wanted I had to give him

0:13:29.080 --> 0:13:31.520
<v Speaker 1>the same. So eventually we got to kindIn. He had

0:13:31.520 --> 0:13:34.199
<v Speaker 1>a little cry there and then he's out the window,

0:13:34.920 --> 0:13:39.520
<v Speaker 1>out the window waving like sobbing, and I thought I

0:13:39.640 --> 0:13:41.520
<v Speaker 1>got in the car. I went I brought this upon

0:13:41.520 --> 0:13:45.000
<v Speaker 1>myself last week by saying fucking see us later.

0:13:45.559 --> 0:13:49.880
<v Speaker 2>The early educators of this country heard. Then they've cast

0:13:49.960 --> 0:13:54.520
<v Speaker 2>a spell over Ashton Wicks. May his children be fucking

0:13:54.559 --> 0:13:55.280
<v Speaker 2>moody forever.

0:13:55.679 --> 0:13:57.560
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it was like and then you know, I did.

0:13:58.080 --> 0:14:00.800
<v Speaker 1>I did actually feel bad because I was like, wait,

0:14:00.880 --> 0:14:06.480
<v Speaker 1>what path I felt bad until I got my can't

0:14:06.520 --> 0:14:06.960
<v Speaker 1>drive away.

0:14:09.120 --> 0:14:11.200
<v Speaker 2>In those situations when you drop them off a daycare,

0:14:11.320 --> 0:14:12.400
<v Speaker 2>do you just drop and run?

0:14:12.400 --> 0:14:14.440
<v Speaker 1>Because you know, sometimes that's exactly what I would do.

0:14:14.600 --> 0:14:17.640
<v Speaker 1>Clean break is good, clean, bright, And like today I

0:14:17.800 --> 0:14:20.240
<v Speaker 1>was like, this is payback for all the other times

0:14:20.280 --> 0:14:22.240
<v Speaker 1>I've just dropped and ran like this was not like

0:14:22.920 --> 0:14:26.080
<v Speaker 1>a wingy, annoying cry, like just this was he was

0:14:26.160 --> 0:14:30.640
<v Speaker 1>legitimately sad and I actually felt for it heart. Yeah

0:14:30.800 --> 0:14:32.960
<v Speaker 1>it did. It actually did. And then I was like,

0:14:33.400 --> 0:14:37.720
<v Speaker 1>thank god, will you pick him up early, Papa, pick

0:14:37.760 --> 0:14:40.880
<v Speaker 1>him up early today? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah. My kids.

0:14:40.960 --> 0:14:44.080
<v Speaker 2>Also, you called and Lola was screaming in the background.

0:14:44.120 --> 0:14:47.280
<v Speaker 1>It was just it's the moon. The moon. It's not

0:14:47.280 --> 0:14:49.640
<v Speaker 1>the blue moon or the red moon. I don't know.

0:14:49.680 --> 0:14:52.720
<v Speaker 1>I feel like it was funny because Lola's screaming in

0:14:52.760 --> 0:14:54.760
<v Speaker 1>the background. And then you got Marley on the phone going, ash,

0:14:54.800 --> 0:14:58.120
<v Speaker 1>I can click, I can click. I was like, I

0:14:58.120 --> 0:15:01.800
<v Speaker 1>don't know, how do I read the room? Yeah?

0:15:01.800 --> 0:15:03.560
<v Speaker 2>It took me an hour and a half to get

0:15:03.560 --> 0:15:06.200
<v Speaker 2>out the door. This morning, just one of those mornings.

0:15:06.400 --> 0:15:08.800
<v Speaker 1>Anything sense so easily.

0:15:08.920 --> 0:15:10.960
<v Speaker 2>One second they're having the time of their life, like

0:15:11.000 --> 0:15:13.960
<v Speaker 2>we're in the same thing, We're in bed, everyone's like whoo.

0:15:14.000 --> 0:15:16.720
<v Speaker 2>I showed Mali a photo when she was a baby,

0:15:16.760 --> 0:15:17.000
<v Speaker 2>and she.

0:15:17.040 --> 0:15:20.160
<v Speaker 1>Was like, oh, Dad, that's cute. Everyone's just like jumping

0:15:20.240 --> 0:15:21.520
<v Speaker 1>on the bed. Yeah.

0:15:21.800 --> 0:15:23.920
<v Speaker 2>And then like a split second later, she wanted to

0:15:23.920 --> 0:15:26.160
<v Speaker 2>do she wanted some drawing and I was like, no,

0:15:26.160 --> 0:15:27.760
<v Speaker 2>I'm not doing drawing because we're going out of daycare

0:15:28.440 --> 0:15:31.640
<v Speaker 2>flipping tables. And I was like, oh god, anyway, but hey,

0:15:31.640 --> 0:15:33.720
<v Speaker 2>I want to speak to about There's two things. Two

0:15:33.760 --> 0:15:36.640
<v Speaker 2>things that happened to me recently. The first is that

0:15:36.720 --> 0:15:39.560
<v Speaker 2>I got my Father's Day gift from Laura.

0:15:39.880 --> 0:15:42.120
<v Speaker 1>Oh yeah, she very generous.

0:15:42.160 --> 0:15:47.760
<v Speaker 2>She booked in a massage Swedish Chinese Balinese fusion.

0:15:47.880 --> 0:15:52.320
<v Speaker 1>I'll take. I'll take. I love a massage. I love

0:15:52.360 --> 0:15:53.120
<v Speaker 1>a massage.

0:15:53.200 --> 0:15:55.240
<v Speaker 2>But there's only one thing that I have to explain

0:15:55.280 --> 0:15:57.120
<v Speaker 2>to the messus when I get a massage.

0:15:57.160 --> 0:16:02.760
<v Speaker 1>They like, don't laugh at my third nipple. I said

0:16:02.800 --> 0:16:05.000
<v Speaker 1>to the guy, I said, it was a man.

0:16:05.040 --> 0:16:06.640
<v Speaker 2>It was a man, which is like, it's good in

0:16:06.680 --> 0:16:07.520
<v Speaker 2>that it's strong.

0:16:07.640 --> 0:16:09.680
<v Speaker 1>It's like a nice muscular I what.

0:16:09.720 --> 0:16:11.880
<v Speaker 2>A firm massage. But I said to him, I'm like,

0:16:11.920 --> 0:16:15.040
<v Speaker 2>look a lot of tension in my back and shoulders

0:16:15.040 --> 0:16:18.440
<v Speaker 2>and neck. If you can focus on that area, I've.

0:16:18.240 --> 0:16:26.040
<v Speaker 1>Got a lot of tension in my back, shoulders, neck, head, feet, arms, buttocks, legs, feet, everything, chest, stomach,

0:16:26.240 --> 0:16:29.120
<v Speaker 1>A lot of tension. Get to it. And he understood.

0:16:29.160 --> 0:16:29.800
<v Speaker 1>He's like, yeah, great.

0:16:29.800 --> 0:16:32.360
<v Speaker 2>He's like oh because you on your laptop and I'm like, yeah, yeah,

0:16:32.360 --> 0:16:33.240
<v Speaker 2>I'm on laptop all the time.

0:16:33.240 --> 0:16:34.840
<v Speaker 1>You know, I like an email ash you love it.

0:16:34.880 --> 0:16:37.840
<v Speaker 1>I love it. You opened up your computers today and

0:16:38.320 --> 0:16:40.840
<v Speaker 1>the first thing that load's like your homepage is linked in.

0:16:41.640 --> 0:16:43.160
<v Speaker 1>I love it, absolutely love it.

0:16:43.240 --> 0:16:47.760
<v Speaker 2>I always have, always corporate. And I said, I just

0:16:47.760 --> 0:16:50.880
<v Speaker 2>don't want my thighs to be done. I get very ticklish,

0:16:50.920 --> 0:16:51.760
<v Speaker 2>so from the knee.

0:16:51.800 --> 0:16:53.200
<v Speaker 1>I don't feel like being hypnal with that.

0:16:56.680 --> 0:17:00.280
<v Speaker 2>And he was like, totally understand. And I said, fit

0:17:00.400 --> 0:17:06.520
<v Speaker 2>calves fine me to hips noga. And I feel as

0:17:06.520 --> 0:17:10.480
<v Speaker 2>though during my massage I was touched inappropriately a number

0:17:10.480 --> 0:17:11.040
<v Speaker 2>of times.

0:17:11.640 --> 0:17:15.080
<v Speaker 1>How look, it's best that we talk about it now

0:17:15.119 --> 0:17:18.600
<v Speaker 1>so that the trauma doesn't build up and build up

0:17:18.640 --> 0:17:20.960
<v Speaker 1>and build up, and then when you're an adult, because

0:17:20.960 --> 0:17:24.800
<v Speaker 1>you're still a child, you have suffer long term trauma.

0:17:24.800 --> 0:17:27.280
<v Speaker 2>And I talk about the twenty twenty three Father's Day

0:17:27.320 --> 0:17:28.200
<v Speaker 2>massage that.

0:17:28.200 --> 0:17:30.399
<v Speaker 1>And then you end up like mister Freeze across the

0:17:30.440 --> 0:17:33.560
<v Speaker 1>street here, the local meth head who wills a samurai sorder.

0:17:33.240 --> 0:17:36.359
<v Speaker 2>Who we will touch upon a little updated. Yes, give

0:17:36.400 --> 0:17:38.480
<v Speaker 2>an update for people who are like mister Freeese. Don't

0:17:38.480 --> 0:17:42.000
<v Speaker 2>worry Ben, we will tell you what's happening there. So

0:17:42.040 --> 0:17:44.320
<v Speaker 2>he did the massage, he did my back and you know,

0:17:44.400 --> 0:17:46.760
<v Speaker 2>you kind of like you have a gauge of time,

0:17:47.080 --> 0:17:49.280
<v Speaker 2>you know, and he touched my back for it must

0:17:49.280 --> 0:17:51.200
<v Speaker 2>have been ten minutes. And then he was already onto

0:17:51.200 --> 0:17:54.720
<v Speaker 2>my calves and I thought that's pretty quick. And then

0:17:55.200 --> 0:17:57.440
<v Speaker 2>he started then rubbing like my thighs.

0:17:57.560 --> 0:17:58.640
<v Speaker 1>Why am I getting in a rector?

0:17:58.640 --> 0:18:02.320
<v Speaker 2>And I thought, maybe he's just got his routine and

0:18:02.320 --> 0:18:04.800
<v Speaker 2>we'll get back to the calves. And then he just

0:18:04.920 --> 0:18:07.840
<v Speaker 2>like man, he was just he was working the thighs

0:18:07.840 --> 0:18:09.160
<v Speaker 2>and the ass like he.

0:18:09.240 --> 0:18:12.080
<v Speaker 1>Just was the back of the thigh. Yeah, so maybe

0:18:12.080 --> 0:18:13.480
<v Speaker 1>he just thought you didn't want to do the front

0:18:13.480 --> 0:18:13.800
<v Speaker 1>of the thigh.

0:18:14.240 --> 0:18:16.920
<v Speaker 2>I was so specific and I said front back? Did

0:18:16.920 --> 0:18:19.639
<v Speaker 2>you be like dude, well, I didn't want to fucking

0:18:19.680 --> 0:18:20.280
<v Speaker 2>say anything.

0:18:20.320 --> 0:18:20.919
<v Speaker 1>Were you naked?

0:18:21.480 --> 0:18:27.480
<v Speaker 2>I had my budgies on, and I didn't know what

0:18:27.560 --> 0:18:29.760
<v Speaker 2>to say, Like I didn't want to I thought, maybe

0:18:29.800 --> 0:18:31.479
<v Speaker 2>he's going to do it. For a second, I had

0:18:31.520 --> 0:18:33.240
<v Speaker 2>an hour and a half booked in. I never have

0:18:33.320 --> 0:18:35.320
<v Speaker 2>an hour and a half, Like that's a fucking long time.

0:18:36.080 --> 0:18:38.280
<v Speaker 2>And I would say it was like an hour of

0:18:38.320 --> 0:18:39.920
<v Speaker 2>that was on my ass.

0:18:42.160 --> 0:18:44.320
<v Speaker 1>Wow, Happy Father's Day, babe.

0:18:44.720 --> 0:18:47.840
<v Speaker 2>He did this thing where he'd like it wasn't like rubbing.

0:18:47.840 --> 0:18:49.280
<v Speaker 2>It was like he would just push in like a

0:18:49.280 --> 0:18:52.320
<v Speaker 2>pressure point in my ass and then he did then

0:18:52.480 --> 0:18:55.520
<v Speaker 2>like move my leg as he was like putting like.

0:18:55.920 --> 0:18:59.159
<v Speaker 2>It was fucking strange and I've had this headache ever since.

0:19:00.200 --> 0:19:05.320
<v Speaker 1>Fuck. Look it was that seems traumatic. But Laura, did

0:19:05.359 --> 0:19:06.720
<v Speaker 1>you do the old when you go home and be like,

0:19:06.760 --> 0:19:11.320
<v Speaker 1>but that was great? Laura was like, how was it?

0:19:11.320 --> 0:19:12.840
<v Speaker 1>It was like, I think I might have cheated on

0:19:12.880 --> 0:19:19.680
<v Speaker 1>your It's like getting a heck, it's a fear of mine. Look,

0:19:19.760 --> 0:19:24.200
<v Speaker 1>I don't you hate massages. I hate I hated get

0:19:24.200 --> 0:19:27.000
<v Speaker 1>touched in appropriately. This is a safe place. No no, no.

0:19:27.119 --> 0:19:29.560
<v Speaker 1>Did you go to the saying one in Bondo? No? No, no, no, no, no,

0:19:29.640 --> 0:19:32.439
<v Speaker 1>definitely not on Wall Street. Look, I was a monster,

0:19:33.320 --> 0:19:37.560
<v Speaker 1>so I've heard. It's not that I'm afraid of being

0:19:37.720 --> 0:19:40.119
<v Speaker 1>like touched by man. No, that's not it, because I'm like,

0:19:40.240 --> 0:19:42.360
<v Speaker 1>as you know, a very touchy guy. Can I say

0:19:42.359 --> 0:19:43.280
<v Speaker 1>one more thing? Yeah.

0:19:43.400 --> 0:19:45.000
<v Speaker 2>One of the reasons why I don't like a man

0:19:45.440 --> 0:19:48.560
<v Speaker 2>to give me massage is the hands are like really rough.

0:19:48.600 --> 0:19:50.440
<v Speaker 2>It was very like the callouses.

0:19:50.560 --> 0:19:53.160
<v Speaker 1>You know, it's like it. So there's a gym goer

0:19:53.880 --> 0:19:56.840
<v Speaker 1>you were that How old was this guy? Forty?

0:19:57.680 --> 0:19:59.680
<v Speaker 2>Very rough hands. It was like being massaged but someone

0:19:59.720 --> 0:20:00.800
<v Speaker 2>was sound paper gloves on.

0:20:00.960 --> 0:20:03.520
<v Speaker 1>I just don't like the feeling of a massage, whether

0:20:03.560 --> 0:20:06.639
<v Speaker 1>it's being from a man or a woman. But the

0:20:06.720 --> 0:20:12.119
<v Speaker 1>last massage, he'll change, perspective, the old made of Bonda,

0:20:12.200 --> 0:20:16.200
<v Speaker 1>he'll change, he'll swing. Yeah. I was in Bali years ago.

0:20:16.280 --> 0:20:19.879
<v Speaker 1>April and I both got a massage at a Ballei place.

0:20:20.240 --> 0:20:22.760
<v Speaker 1>I can't like. I think it was incouder or leg

0:20:22.760 --> 0:20:25.720
<v Speaker 1>you whatever. And this is the last massage I had

0:20:25.760 --> 0:20:29.120
<v Speaker 1>so long before we were even married. I'm talking ten

0:20:29.280 --> 0:20:32.520
<v Speaker 1>years ago since I've had a massage. I don't lie,

0:20:33.119 --> 0:20:36.840
<v Speaker 1>you can, I just don't. I don't like the pressure

0:20:36.880 --> 0:20:39.400
<v Speaker 1>of it. But this particular it was a man as well,

0:20:39.520 --> 0:20:42.639
<v Speaker 1>nice guy whatever, but he literally beat me up. It

0:20:42.760 --> 0:20:45.679
<v Speaker 1>was like a fucking like I like, he was like

0:20:45.840 --> 0:20:48.240
<v Speaker 1>punching my back, like he was taking out some serious

0:20:48.280 --> 0:20:51.200
<v Speaker 1>anger going to town on you. Did you say anything? No,

0:20:51.359 --> 0:20:54.240
<v Speaker 1>because you can't. It's like when your heads I fucked

0:20:54.280 --> 0:20:57.080
<v Speaker 1>your hair up and you're like it was great and

0:20:57.119 --> 0:20:58.680
<v Speaker 1>then you go home and shave your head.

0:20:58.560 --> 0:21:01.000
<v Speaker 2>Dude, the Messus could be hot whax on me, and

0:21:01.040 --> 0:21:03.480
<v Speaker 2>I'd be like, that is lovely, that is beautiful.

0:21:03.520 --> 0:21:06.280
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna get a third degree by very much great

0:21:06.600 --> 0:21:09.200
<v Speaker 1>and like honestly, like just beat me up and that's

0:21:09.240 --> 0:21:11.480
<v Speaker 1>all I remember. I'm a little bit traumatized from that.

0:21:11.600 --> 0:21:13.159
<v Speaker 1>I think that I'm just like I didn't like that,

0:21:13.240 --> 0:21:14.760
<v Speaker 1>So why would I do something I don't line? Do

0:21:14.760 --> 0:21:18.200
<v Speaker 1>you like massages prior to that? Not really either, I

0:21:18.240 --> 0:21:20.280
<v Speaker 1>don't know, but I think that just firmed up that

0:21:20.320 --> 0:21:23.400
<v Speaker 1>this is not for me. Yeah. Look if someone like

0:21:23.400 --> 0:21:25.200
<v Speaker 1>like when I go on like a roller or something

0:21:25.280 --> 0:21:27.840
<v Speaker 1>like that, I hate that. I hate it, and people

0:21:28.000 --> 0:21:32.000
<v Speaker 1>was like I love getting on the roller. Jesus Christ, Relax,

0:21:32.200 --> 0:21:37.679
<v Speaker 1>Jesus Christ. Does April ever give you a massage? Now?

0:21:37.760 --> 0:21:42.280
<v Speaker 1>She doesn't touch me? Ah nah, because she knows I'm

0:21:42.320 --> 0:21:45.320
<v Speaker 1>not into it. That's just not for me. Speaking of

0:21:45.320 --> 0:21:47.920
<v Speaker 1>father today present, there's a guy who lives across the

0:21:47.920 --> 0:21:51.640
<v Speaker 1>street from me here. First of all, really nice guy,

0:21:52.000 --> 0:21:54.320
<v Speaker 1>so nice so that the other night when I went

0:21:54.359 --> 0:21:56.880
<v Speaker 1>out onto the boxing and I got home at like

0:21:56.960 --> 0:22:00.000
<v Speaker 1>two two thirty in the morning. Anyway, it was early

0:22:00.160 --> 0:22:02.040
<v Speaker 1>in the morning, late at night, early in the morning.

0:22:02.080 --> 0:22:03.359
<v Speaker 1>And I saw him a few days later and he

0:22:03.359 --> 0:22:05.919
<v Speaker 1>comes up to me. He goes, he was you okay.

0:22:06.240 --> 0:22:09.000
<v Speaker 1>I was like why. He goes, oh, you wake me

0:22:09.080 --> 0:22:11.440
<v Speaker 1>up the other morning, because that garage is really squeaky.

0:22:11.920 --> 0:22:14.440
<v Speaker 1>And I looked at the window and you were flat

0:22:14.480 --> 0:22:18.120
<v Speaker 1>on your back in the garage. I was like, oh, yeah,

0:22:18.160 --> 0:22:20.520
<v Speaker 1>I'd been out. He was like, how fucked up were you?

0:22:20.600 --> 0:22:23.720
<v Speaker 1>And I was like no. I was like, no, no misunderstanding.

0:22:24.119 --> 0:22:26.040
<v Speaker 1>He was like, I nearly called the ambulance. Did you

0:22:26.080 --> 0:22:29.120
<v Speaker 1>pass out? No? So I was trying to close the garage,

0:22:29.359 --> 0:22:31.480
<v Speaker 1>like I opened a little bit to slide in underneath

0:22:32.920 --> 0:22:35.320
<v Speaker 1>like a cat burglar. He said he nearly called the

0:22:35.320 --> 0:22:37.560
<v Speaker 1>police because he thought and then he realized. He's like,

0:22:37.840 --> 0:22:39.360
<v Speaker 1>he thought we were getting robbed, and then he saw

0:22:39.400 --> 0:22:41.480
<v Speaker 1>me and he thought, oh, he's dead. She's had a

0:22:41.480 --> 0:22:44.679
<v Speaker 1>heart attack. But the reason I was so still is

0:22:44.720 --> 0:22:48.919
<v Speaker 1>because I was edging the garage really really slowly to

0:22:48.960 --> 0:22:50.720
<v Speaker 1>not wake the kids up. Why don't you just get

0:22:50.720 --> 0:22:53.520
<v Speaker 1>some WD forty. I've done it now, I've done the

0:22:53.600 --> 0:22:57.000
<v Speaker 1>WD forty. Yeah. But anyway, he's nice really nice guy.

0:22:57.040 --> 0:22:59.960
<v Speaker 1>But I've been in this house now for too far

0:23:00.040 --> 0:23:03.720
<v Speaker 1>other days, let's call it, and I've noticed something about him.

0:23:04.240 --> 0:23:07.199
<v Speaker 1>And he's a grandfather. And he's got this shirt that

0:23:07.240 --> 0:23:11.720
<v Speaker 1>he wears on both Father's days, which is great. So

0:23:11.800 --> 0:23:14.280
<v Speaker 1>it's a shirt both father's days. So this one and

0:23:14.400 --> 0:23:17.640
<v Speaker 1>last year, I got you, gotcha, confuse you the shit

0:23:17.680 --> 0:23:21.520
<v Speaker 1>out of you. There. I thought maybe he was like English,

0:23:21.640 --> 0:23:25.960
<v Speaker 1>he's American. Actually continue so actually when is American? Father? That?

0:23:25.960 --> 0:23:29.200
<v Speaker 1>I keep tabs on that too. Maybe I've seen it more,

0:23:29.320 --> 0:23:33.000
<v Speaker 1>but anyway, it's a great shirt. It's just a brown shirt,

0:23:33.480 --> 0:23:36.359
<v Speaker 1>classic grandpa brown shirt, and on the back of his

0:23:36.560 --> 0:23:40.520
<v Speaker 1>a photo of him and his granddaughter and it's his

0:23:40.680 --> 0:23:45.119
<v Speaker 1>best friend since two thousand and eight. I love that

0:23:45.560 --> 0:23:50.080
<v Speaker 1>like that, and he like proudly wears it on Father's Day.

0:23:50.200 --> 0:23:53.320
<v Speaker 1>Like that is great. That's like honestly, like you know

0:23:53.320 --> 0:23:56.160
<v Speaker 1>how there was like like my kids love Popper. Yeah,

0:23:56.200 --> 0:23:58.840
<v Speaker 1>like it's like they hate dad but love Popper. Right,

0:23:59.359 --> 0:24:02.000
<v Speaker 1>it's like our best friends. Do you think you get

0:24:02.000 --> 0:24:05.120
<v Speaker 1>to that age you don't have any real friends. I'm

0:24:05.119 --> 0:24:10.240
<v Speaker 1>already already at that age, which I think, yeah, super cute.

0:24:10.280 --> 0:24:12.679
<v Speaker 1>But then it made me think about like shit Father's

0:24:12.720 --> 0:24:16.520
<v Speaker 1>Day presence and every year anyone who has kids, kindie,

0:24:16.640 --> 0:24:19.080
<v Speaker 1>they always make a really big effort to make sure

0:24:19.119 --> 0:24:22.639
<v Speaker 1>that you get something from the kids are painting that's

0:24:23.400 --> 0:24:28.600
<v Speaker 1>terrible or something. But I've got a beer cooler that's

0:24:28.640 --> 0:24:29.040
<v Speaker 1>not bad.

0:24:29.200 --> 0:24:31.359
<v Speaker 2>Got to be a cooller which was was drawn as

0:24:31.400 --> 0:24:33.960
<v Speaker 2>a white beer cooler, which had been drawn by the kids.

0:24:34.160 --> 0:24:37.320
<v Speaker 2>Got one from Mali, one from Lola Marley's was Okah,

0:24:37.560 --> 0:24:38.240
<v Speaker 2>it was terrible.

0:24:38.720 --> 0:24:41.800
<v Speaker 1>It was no good. It was it was you're like

0:24:41.880 --> 0:24:44.040
<v Speaker 1>judging it. So who's the winner is really? Give you

0:24:44.080 --> 0:24:46.040
<v Speaker 1>kids the complex the.

0:24:46.000 --> 0:24:48.040
<v Speaker 2>One that Loa gave me, still on the floor of

0:24:48.080 --> 0:24:50.760
<v Speaker 2>the car. She doesn't know what she can't even remember

0:24:51.200 --> 0:24:52.119
<v Speaker 2>what happened this morning.

0:24:52.520 --> 0:24:54.080
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I'll get it. I'll put it in them. But

0:24:54.119 --> 0:24:57.280
<v Speaker 1>that's not bad. That's not bad. Some shitty artwork, No,

0:24:57.600 --> 0:25:02.359
<v Speaker 1>just the Wow, look how much shitty artworker's up there?

0:25:02.640 --> 0:25:05.320
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, there's oscar get really pumped and you pick him

0:25:05.400 --> 0:25:07.159
<v Speaker 2>up and he's like, oh, comes home and he goes, Daddy,

0:25:07.240 --> 0:25:08.240
<v Speaker 2>look look I made.

0:25:08.119 --> 0:25:10.760
<v Speaker 1>There's another stack up there. There's another stack in the

0:25:10.800 --> 0:25:14.880
<v Speaker 1>family filing cabinet. Look at it. It's too much you're

0:25:14.880 --> 0:25:17.119
<v Speaker 1>gonna throw it out, You're gonna frame it, wait for

0:25:17.160 --> 0:25:22.160
<v Speaker 1>next winter and use it. There's kindly, But this year, look,

0:25:22.200 --> 0:25:24.879
<v Speaker 1>and I feel like every week I'm having a swap

0:25:24.920 --> 0:25:27.480
<v Speaker 1>at kindy And I'm sorry, this isn't a swap you

0:25:27.520 --> 0:25:31.640
<v Speaker 1>because I appreciate the effort. Okay, that to go. We'll

0:25:31.720 --> 0:25:34.520
<v Speaker 1>send Oscar home and Macy home with something to that.

0:25:34.640 --> 0:25:38.600
<v Speaker 1>Appreciate the effort. So don't get me wrong, but there's

0:25:38.680 --> 0:25:42.240
<v Speaker 1>no way I want a fucking jar AsSalt. And that's

0:25:42.240 --> 0:25:46.240
<v Speaker 1>what I got this year. Okay, It's just it's a

0:25:46.359 --> 0:25:49.960
<v Speaker 1>tiny jub I was like, I have it, yeah it, yeah, please?

0:25:51.760 --> 0:25:54.600
<v Speaker 1>Who's coming up with these ideas? I don't hate it.

0:25:54.800 --> 0:25:58.760
<v Speaker 1>I don't hate it. What's like the grass clippings in it?

0:25:58.800 --> 0:26:02.520
<v Speaker 1>Like rosemary ideas? But why did they think that I

0:26:02.520 --> 0:26:06.760
<v Speaker 1>wouldn't need salt? It's rosemary. It's rosemary infused salt what

0:26:06.800 --> 0:26:09.600
<v Speaker 1>every father needs. Yeah, but that's like what who just

0:26:09.680 --> 0:26:13.119
<v Speaker 1>so who signed off on that? Give me a beer caller.

0:26:13.720 --> 0:26:15.879
<v Speaker 1>That's a lot of salt. It is a lot of salt.

0:26:15.880 --> 0:26:21.879
<v Speaker 1>But like what like what like I just don't just

0:26:21.880 --> 0:26:27.400
<v Speaker 1>don't get it, Matthew, Like I'm puffed from end upstairs

0:26:27.480 --> 0:26:30.320
<v Speaker 1>to make you do that. But like, look, if you're listening,

0:26:30.440 --> 0:26:32.879
<v Speaker 1>it's just gone past Father's Day, so of course, Happy

0:26:32.920 --> 0:26:35.600
<v Speaker 1>Father's Day to everyone. Well this is going to come out.

0:26:35.680 --> 0:26:37.760
<v Speaker 1>Well wait, we didn't even wish anyone. No, we didn't.

0:26:37.800 --> 0:26:39.360
<v Speaker 1>I didn't. That's why I did it on the story.

0:26:39.720 --> 0:26:42.320
<v Speaker 1>But just tell us what you got that was shared. Look,

0:26:42.440 --> 0:26:44.879
<v Speaker 1>it's a unique gift. It's weird that they didn't.

0:26:45.200 --> 0:26:47.520
<v Speaker 2>And for anyone who's wondering what the salt looks like,

0:26:47.560 --> 0:26:50.160
<v Speaker 2>we will put a photo of this slash video on

0:26:50.160 --> 0:26:52.679
<v Speaker 2>our socials at two doting dads. But it's weird that

0:26:52.760 --> 0:26:55.600
<v Speaker 2>it's not in any way painted by Oscar.

0:26:55.760 --> 0:26:57.720
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I thought, yeah, do you know what you paint that?

0:26:57.960 --> 0:27:02.200
<v Speaker 1>And I'm like, that's cool. Here we go. God ashes

0:27:02.280 --> 0:27:03.680
<v Speaker 1>off the table. He's now.

0:27:06.359 --> 0:27:09.040
<v Speaker 2>He's getting something else. Not sure what it's going to be.

0:27:09.119 --> 0:27:15.200
<v Speaker 1>Oh, he's good. This is last year. That's good gear.

0:27:15.359 --> 0:27:19.040
<v Speaker 1>That's that's that's what I'm expecting. What's underneath it? Yeah,

0:27:19.119 --> 0:27:19.640
<v Speaker 1>last year?

0:27:20.280 --> 0:27:23.159
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and it's that's Oscar's hand a wooden box. And

0:27:23.200 --> 0:27:25.840
<v Speaker 2>again we'll put this on socials, a wooden box handprint.

0:27:26.240 --> 0:27:27.040
<v Speaker 1>Happy Father's Day.

0:27:27.040 --> 0:27:31.040
<v Speaker 2>Sticker and it says fun dad, strong dad, kind dad.

0:27:31.200 --> 0:27:31.840
<v Speaker 1>That's not true.

0:27:32.160 --> 0:27:35.160
<v Speaker 2>Why is dad sweet dad?

0:27:35.520 --> 0:27:43.480
<v Speaker 1>Best dad? True? My dad? My dad? See that quality

0:27:44.240 --> 0:27:50.160
<v Speaker 1>very different. Hey, I'm disgruntled. I understand. I was like,

0:27:50.200 --> 0:27:53.240
<v Speaker 1>it's confusing, like here you go, is there anything else?

0:27:53.280 --> 0:27:55.600
<v Speaker 1>Do you reckon? Do you reckon? Oscar's just broken into

0:27:55.640 --> 0:28:00.280
<v Speaker 1>the kitchen and just yeah, yeah, the food down at

0:28:00.320 --> 0:28:06.200
<v Speaker 1>Kinny's really blanding now but yeah, look, actually I forgot

0:28:06.200 --> 0:28:09.720
<v Speaker 1>about that and just till now. But again in the cupboard, no,

0:28:09.760 --> 0:28:12.640
<v Speaker 1>I can see it. But the artwork, there's too much.

0:28:12.800 --> 0:28:13.440
<v Speaker 1>I understand.

0:28:13.520 --> 0:28:18.200
<v Speaker 2>Also also love love people who work at daycare, all educators,

0:28:18.240 --> 0:28:20.200
<v Speaker 2>you guys, unsung heroes of this.

0:28:20.359 --> 0:28:22.800
<v Speaker 1>I already told them to get over themselves earlier on. Yeah.

0:28:23.080 --> 0:28:25.240
<v Speaker 1>I don't think I can backflip on that, but that's

0:28:25.240 --> 0:28:27.440
<v Speaker 1>what I'm saying. I am not having a dig at them,

0:28:28.000 --> 0:28:31.840
<v Speaker 1>because it's the thought that counts. But just think about

0:28:31.880 --> 0:28:32.760
<v Speaker 1>what you're sending home.

0:28:32.920 --> 0:28:36.480
<v Speaker 2>There was every month there's like a new little fundraiser

0:28:36.720 --> 0:28:41.760
<v Speaker 2>at our daycare, you know, sometimes really great organizations. It

0:28:41.840 --> 0:28:45.120
<v Speaker 2>changes each time, and they're raising money.

0:28:45.120 --> 0:28:47.240
<v Speaker 1>I'm not sure who's for only fans.

0:28:50.560 --> 0:28:54.400
<v Speaker 2>I'm sure it's a very deserving organization. And the mechanic

0:28:55.000 --> 0:28:59.200
<v Speaker 2>was I think it was a donation for art that

0:28:59.320 --> 0:29:02.400
<v Speaker 2>has been created by like there's three different groups at decade.

0:29:02.400 --> 0:29:05.080
<v Speaker 2>There's like the infants, there's like the toddlers, so maybe

0:29:05.080 --> 0:29:08.480
<v Speaker 2>like one to two ish, and then there's like two three,

0:29:08.880 --> 0:29:10.880
<v Speaker 2>two to four. And it was done by those who

0:29:10.880 --> 0:29:12.000
<v Speaker 2>at age one to two.

0:29:12.040 --> 0:29:12.840
<v Speaker 1>So it was like a.

0:29:12.720 --> 0:29:17.160
<v Speaker 2>Stack of artwork that donated that you could donate a

0:29:17.160 --> 0:29:18.800
<v Speaker 2>bit of money for and you get you get to

0:29:18.840 --> 0:29:19.680
<v Speaker 2>choose your artwork.

0:29:19.720 --> 0:29:21.600
<v Speaker 1>But it was just it was just it was so

0:29:21.720 --> 0:29:24.840
<v Speaker 1>first of all, you're already sending home shitty artwork and

0:29:24.880 --> 0:29:27.280
<v Speaker 1>now they're asking you to pay for more shitty artwork

0:29:27.400 --> 0:29:29.800
<v Speaker 1>as a donation. And I'll tell you what, I'll give

0:29:29.840 --> 0:29:31.960
<v Speaker 1>you the money. I don't want the shitty artwork because

0:29:32.000 --> 0:29:35.400
<v Speaker 1>I could just about start my own artwork. I've got

0:29:35.480 --> 0:29:38.680
<v Speaker 1>up there. And the rule is if any of that

0:29:38.720 --> 0:29:41.280
<v Speaker 1>comes down, it goes straight to the bin. So if

0:29:41.320 --> 0:29:44.560
<v Speaker 1>I pull that cupboard sometimes you know those coin machines,

0:29:44.600 --> 0:29:46.160
<v Speaker 1>you put a coin and it pushes them to the

0:29:46.240 --> 0:29:49.320
<v Speaker 1>edge and sometimes they fall out. If anything falls out

0:29:49.320 --> 0:29:51.600
<v Speaker 1>of there, on one of the opens straight to the bin.

0:29:52.040 --> 0:29:55.440
<v Speaker 2>I'm not opposed to throwing out artwork. Laura has a

0:29:55.520 --> 0:29:56.600
<v Speaker 2>draw anything.

0:29:56.680 --> 0:30:01.120
<v Speaker 1>Marley draws. She's very good. Marley is good. She's very good.

0:30:01.200 --> 0:30:03.760
<v Speaker 2>And Laura keeps it all but like there's not like

0:30:03.880 --> 0:30:05.560
<v Speaker 2>what are we going to do with it? You know,

0:30:05.920 --> 0:30:07.840
<v Speaker 2>we reached a limit now.

0:30:08.440 --> 0:30:11.320
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I also got a picture. I'd like this because

0:30:11.360 --> 0:30:14.040
<v Speaker 1>it's a good laugh and it's like a picture and

0:30:14.080 --> 0:30:15.760
<v Speaker 1>that it has what they love about their dad, but

0:30:15.800 --> 0:30:18.160
<v Speaker 1>it's written not in their handwriting, because he can barely

0:30:18.200 --> 0:30:20.760
<v Speaker 1>fucking write. The teachers said, you know, what do you

0:30:20.840 --> 0:30:23.040
<v Speaker 1>like about your daddy? Mine was like, I'm just gonna

0:30:23.040 --> 0:30:28.080
<v Speaker 1>get it because back up again, Yeah you are okay.

0:30:28.120 --> 0:30:30.640
<v Speaker 1>As I was saying, they send home these and it's

0:30:30.640 --> 0:30:33.640
<v Speaker 1>got my dad, and then I love my dad because

0:30:33.680 --> 0:30:35.600
<v Speaker 1>and then they write the rest of it because if

0:30:35.600 --> 0:30:38.200
<v Speaker 1>I was his handwriting is that neat? Can I read it?

0:30:38.480 --> 0:30:40.080
<v Speaker 1>Read it? So? Great?

0:30:40.120 --> 0:30:43.600
<v Speaker 2>Picture of you blue nose and you've got a purple mouth,

0:30:43.800 --> 0:30:46.480
<v Speaker 2>which is weird. I love my dad because he helps

0:30:46.520 --> 0:30:48.920
<v Speaker 2>me with boxes and toys and making things.

0:30:49.200 --> 0:30:51.720
<v Speaker 1>That's beautiful. Yeah, that's really nice. I like that, But

0:30:52.040 --> 0:30:55.160
<v Speaker 1>you know they're always so random. April's one was the

0:30:55.160 --> 0:30:56.760
<v Speaker 1>best for Mother's Day a couple of years ago. It

0:30:56.800 --> 0:30:59.400
<v Speaker 1>was like, I love my mummy because she makes the

0:30:59.480 --> 0:31:10.280
<v Speaker 1>drinks alcoholic. I was like, until people anyway, Ship presents.

0:31:09.920 --> 0:31:12.240
<v Speaker 2>Ash before we do the segment one of your favorites,

0:31:12.280 --> 0:31:15.760
<v Speaker 2>Budgie Smugglers Most Ordinary Parent. Do you want to give

0:31:15.840 --> 0:31:18.760
<v Speaker 2>us a little update of mister Freeze aka the Samurai

0:31:18.760 --> 0:31:19.800
<v Speaker 2>Wilding meth Head.

0:31:19.840 --> 0:31:23.120
<v Speaker 1>The Samurai meth Head. Yeah. Look, there's been some more

0:31:23.440 --> 0:31:27.520
<v Speaker 1>kerfuffles in the area. So if you heard the last

0:31:27.520 --> 0:31:29.600
<v Speaker 1>episode he was wielding a samurai saw it in the

0:31:29.680 --> 0:31:33.160
<v Speaker 1>kids park on a Sunday, which is prime time kids

0:31:33.160 --> 0:31:36.120
<v Speaker 1>park time. And then I went over to the cafe

0:31:36.200 --> 0:31:38.080
<v Speaker 1>yesterday and there was like three or four cop cars

0:31:38.080 --> 0:31:42.720
<v Speaker 1>in the car park. Again what now? And I walked

0:31:42.720 --> 0:31:46.120
<v Speaker 1>into the cafe and Peak goes, mister Freeze's at it again.

0:31:46.480 --> 0:31:48.640
<v Speaker 1>Why do they call him? Mister Freeze? Is a nice said,

0:31:48.720 --> 0:31:52.520
<v Speaker 1>I think to be creative. So it's not has nothing

0:31:52.520 --> 0:31:56.160
<v Speaker 1>to do with Batman. You guys have given him that name,

0:31:56.800 --> 0:32:01.040
<v Speaker 1>it's not. Yeah, he doesn't introduce himself as mister Freeze. Yeah. Yeah.

0:32:01.280 --> 0:32:03.120
<v Speaker 1>First of all, I was like, this is a nickname

0:32:03.160 --> 0:32:06.320
<v Speaker 1>that Pete's given him, and then I put the video

0:32:06.520 --> 0:32:09.320
<v Speaker 1>on our socials of me telling that story last week,

0:32:09.440 --> 0:32:12.960
<v Speaker 1>and two or three people have messaged me saying, oh, classic,

0:32:13.040 --> 0:32:17.880
<v Speaker 1>mister Freeze. So he's known in the area now as

0:32:18.040 --> 0:32:21.120
<v Speaker 1>mister Freeze and he will not go by any other

0:32:21.200 --> 0:32:24.560
<v Speaker 1>name other than that. And he's still and if he's listening,

0:32:25.880 --> 0:32:28.400
<v Speaker 1>the samurai saw was taken off him and he somehow

0:32:28.520 --> 0:32:32.480
<v Speaker 1>produced a new samurai. I don't know, but if you

0:32:32.520 --> 0:32:36.600
<v Speaker 1>go into his Facebook, it's really bad because he lives

0:32:36.600 --> 0:32:39.560
<v Speaker 1>close and he'll probably come after me. Sorry. Kids. A

0:32:39.560 --> 0:32:43.640
<v Speaker 1>photo his profile picture is a photo of a samurai saw. Yeah,

0:32:43.680 --> 0:32:47.280
<v Speaker 1>but which one. We're not sure it's actually it's actually

0:32:47.640 --> 0:32:50.080
<v Speaker 1>a clip out of a samurai with like a Japanese

0:32:50.160 --> 0:32:52.640
<v Speaker 1>dragon behind it. It's safe to say the guy's into

0:32:52.640 --> 0:33:00.040
<v Speaker 1>samurai saw. Anyway, We love you, mister Freeze. When you

0:33:00.080 --> 0:33:02.840
<v Speaker 1>come out on Parole. We cannot wait to have you

0:33:02.880 --> 0:33:06.600
<v Speaker 1>on the podcast back. Well, apparently he held his parents hostage. Okay,

0:33:06.640 --> 0:33:08.160
<v Speaker 1>I wonder if he's got any kids. Been nice to

0:33:08.160 --> 0:33:11.280
<v Speaker 1>have him on. Well, Pete was saying that he was

0:33:11.600 --> 0:33:13.640
<v Speaker 1>he was out in the front of his house with

0:33:13.720 --> 0:33:17.320
<v Speaker 1>a fishing rod, casting the fishing rod into the car. Park. Okay,

0:33:17.720 --> 0:33:19.600
<v Speaker 1>like he was fishing, what are you catch trying to catch?

0:33:19.640 --> 0:33:21.800
<v Speaker 1>What are you trying to catch? Mate? Thank you for

0:33:21.840 --> 0:33:23.480
<v Speaker 1>the update. It's going to the new segment.

0:33:23.520 --> 0:33:26.440
<v Speaker 2>Let's should we have this like a running a running segment.

0:33:27.880 --> 0:33:31.200
<v Speaker 1>Freeze should get his home address and knock on his door.

0:33:31.240 --> 0:33:34.680
<v Speaker 1>I know roughly which one is. But look, I'm very

0:33:34.720 --> 0:33:37.280
<v Speaker 1>mindful that if he has any idea of who you are,

0:33:37.400 --> 0:33:40.200
<v Speaker 1>you'll follow me. I will never do another record here again.

0:33:42.160 --> 0:33:44.920
<v Speaker 1>Let's do this segment, Budgie Smoker's most Ordinary parent. I

0:33:44.920 --> 0:33:49.040
<v Speaker 1>thought you'd never ask. Let's do it. We just argent

0:33:49.600 --> 0:33:55.880
<v Speaker 1>repair ordinary repair. We don't know what we do. We

0:33:55.960 --> 0:34:06.120
<v Speaker 1>don't know what we're doing because repair. Those of you

0:34:06.160 --> 0:34:07.840
<v Speaker 1>who don't know what this segment is. It's brought to

0:34:07.840 --> 0:34:11.640
<v Speaker 1>you by Budget Smugglud of course, and I fighted. That's okay,

0:34:11.640 --> 0:34:16.480
<v Speaker 1>I farted across the six again. Play on. You have

0:34:16.480 --> 0:34:19.160
<v Speaker 1>the opportunity, not you, Matthew. The listeners have the opportunity

0:34:19.200 --> 0:34:22.480
<v Speaker 1>to win two hundred dollars worth of Budget Smugglers product,

0:34:22.480 --> 0:34:24.640
<v Speaker 1>which is great. Every time we rung this segment, and

0:34:24.680 --> 0:34:27.399
<v Speaker 1>the segment is based around the ordinary parenting you do.

0:34:27.480 --> 0:34:31.040
<v Speaker 1>And example is The winner last week was someone who

0:34:31.120 --> 0:34:34.840
<v Speaker 1>secretly breaks their kids toys so that she has an

0:34:34.880 --> 0:34:36.080
<v Speaker 1>excuse to throw them out.

0:34:36.160 --> 0:34:39.759
<v Speaker 2>I was thinking about last week. I do think that

0:34:39.920 --> 0:34:41.960
<v Speaker 2>and deserving.

0:34:41.480 --> 0:34:43.600
<v Speaker 1>Of the award the gift for trying to take it

0:34:43.640 --> 0:34:43.960
<v Speaker 1>back off.

0:34:44.239 --> 0:34:46.280
<v Speaker 2>No, I would never take it back off her because

0:34:46.280 --> 0:34:49.279
<v Speaker 2>we've given it out and I'm glad that she got it.

0:34:49.320 --> 0:34:52.120
<v Speaker 2>But I did think, don't you reckon? It's better off

0:34:52.280 --> 0:34:54.799
<v Speaker 2>just to like, when the kids are away, you can

0:34:54.840 --> 0:34:56.600
<v Speaker 2>just throw things out without them realizing.

0:34:57.040 --> 0:34:59.359
<v Speaker 1>I see it. You can also instead of throwing them out,

0:34:59.360 --> 0:35:02.759
<v Speaker 1>maybe donate them. Okay, but that's different. I think the

0:35:02.920 --> 0:35:06.640
<v Speaker 1>reason for the breaking them secretly and then pretending to

0:35:06.680 --> 0:35:08.480
<v Speaker 1>break them when the kids are there so they know

0:35:08.560 --> 0:35:12.320
<v Speaker 1>what happened to them. So there's sometimes when i've for example,

0:35:12.400 --> 0:35:13.680
<v Speaker 1>the other night, I woke up in the middle of

0:35:13.719 --> 0:35:16.279
<v Speaker 1>nights who get Oscar? Because he pissed the bed and

0:35:16.320 --> 0:35:19.520
<v Speaker 1>I stepped on his favorite monster truck snapped the wheel

0:35:19.520 --> 0:35:23.480
<v Speaker 1>off of hidden it. He doesn't know yet somehow I'm

0:35:23.480 --> 0:35:27.000
<v Speaker 1>going to make so it looks like he broke it anyway.

0:35:27.719 --> 0:35:30.200
<v Speaker 1>That's what this segment's all about. But if I just

0:35:30.320 --> 0:35:32.480
<v Speaker 1>threw that out, for example, and he was like, where's

0:35:32.480 --> 0:35:34.960
<v Speaker 1>my grave digger monster truck. Then I'll be like, oh,

0:35:35.040 --> 0:35:36.839
<v Speaker 1>throw it out. That's way worse when you go, oh,

0:35:36.960 --> 0:35:40.920
<v Speaker 1>mommy accidentally broke it, silly clumsy mummy. Ha. We'll have

0:35:41.000 --> 0:35:43.040
<v Speaker 1>to throw it out because it's not fixable. So that's

0:35:43.040 --> 0:35:48.520
<v Speaker 1>what your points nullum voice. Sorry, apologies. Okay, So this week,

0:35:49.120 --> 0:35:51.160
<v Speaker 1>let's go. We'll do the same thing. We'll read out

0:35:51.160 --> 0:35:53.880
<v Speaker 1>one age and then we'll read out the winter. And

0:35:53.920 --> 0:35:57.600
<v Speaker 1>I've got an absolute cracker for the winner. I reckon

0:35:57.920 --> 0:36:01.440
<v Speaker 1>he's been warning. No Jesus a tag on them. They

0:36:01.520 --> 0:36:02.360
<v Speaker 1>smell tangy.

0:36:02.680 --> 0:36:05.000
<v Speaker 2>We've got Budgies over the mics and these are the

0:36:05.000 --> 0:36:10.759
<v Speaker 2>customs limited edition Jam Pikelerts Pink Budgy smugglers. We will

0:36:10.760 --> 0:36:11.839
<v Speaker 2>at some point give some out.

0:36:12.239 --> 0:36:14.600
<v Speaker 1>We will. Yes, I've got some on the way. They're

0:36:14.640 --> 0:36:17.960
<v Speaker 1>fucking great. A they're brand new. No, they're bananas. I

0:36:18.040 --> 0:36:20.480
<v Speaker 1>love it. Yeah, I've got I've got them all man. Okay,

0:36:20.480 --> 0:36:23.280
<v Speaker 1>so I've got a great one here. Great in terms

0:36:23.320 --> 0:36:29.160
<v Speaker 1>of this is fucking average. This is very average. I

0:36:29.160 --> 0:36:31.840
<v Speaker 1>shouldn't laugh. You shouldn't be I shouldn't laugh, but I

0:36:31.840 --> 0:36:36.080
<v Speaker 1>will from Meg another Meg Meg won at last week

0:36:36.239 --> 0:36:39.080
<v Speaker 1>is the same. I don't ever last name. Maybe Meg's

0:36:39.160 --> 0:36:43.120
<v Speaker 1>just like Meg's just an ordinary preparent. He loves Budgie,

0:36:44.320 --> 0:36:46.720
<v Speaker 1>she says, hungover question Mark.

0:36:47.239 --> 0:36:51.120
<v Speaker 2>Sometimes we are. She has a great solution, throw a

0:36:51.280 --> 0:36:55.280
<v Speaker 2>handful of sultanas all across the floor and head straight

0:36:55.320 --> 0:36:59.600
<v Speaker 2>back to bed. These kids occupied for hours an hour?

0:37:01.120 --> 0:37:02.160
<v Speaker 2>How many is she throwing?

0:37:02.920 --> 0:37:04.600
<v Speaker 1>She's just like one of those Kilo bags.

0:37:05.600 --> 0:37:07.800
<v Speaker 2>It's like when you're a farmer and you're feeding pigs

0:37:07.840 --> 0:37:09.960
<v Speaker 2>and you're just throwing feet off the floor.

0:37:09.760 --> 0:37:12.920
<v Speaker 1>Trying to keep me entertained. I know a look, I

0:37:12.960 --> 0:37:15.520
<v Speaker 1>know what you mean. Like that, my kids love sultanas.

0:37:15.680 --> 0:37:18.239
<v Speaker 1>Might have grown out of the sultana phase. Do you

0:37:18.280 --> 0:37:20.080
<v Speaker 1>know what would really get him? If I threw like

0:37:20.120 --> 0:37:22.799
<v Speaker 1>a bunch of Eminem's, Oh, that would be it. I'd

0:37:22.800 --> 0:37:26.400
<v Speaker 1>get it. It's to sleep all day, just really really quickly.

0:37:26.960 --> 0:37:30.000
<v Speaker 2>We have a packet of Eminem's and it sits next

0:37:30.000 --> 0:37:32.200
<v Speaker 2>to the wheat picks. And this morning I got the

0:37:32.239 --> 0:37:35.080
<v Speaker 2>wheat picks out and the Eminem's packet fell on the ground.

0:37:35.800 --> 0:37:38.280
<v Speaker 2>I like a few Eminem's like bounced.

0:37:37.880 --> 0:37:41.280
<v Speaker 1>andCA It's like it was like little rodents.

0:37:42.280 --> 0:37:44.879
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, like, honestly, before I had a chance, Lola was like,

0:37:45.239 --> 0:37:49.000
<v Speaker 2>looking at she's already an I give it back, like

0:37:49.040 --> 0:37:49.719
<v Speaker 2>wrestling with that.

0:37:50.120 --> 0:37:55.680
<v Speaker 1>She's like, that's great. So the next one, this is

0:37:55.719 --> 0:37:57.799
<v Speaker 1>also not the winner. This is just another one which

0:37:57.840 --> 0:38:00.279
<v Speaker 1>we thought was really good as well. Actually I really

0:38:00.280 --> 0:38:03.960
<v Speaker 1>do like this one. So Marie, she doubles the bedding

0:38:04.200 --> 0:38:06.759
<v Speaker 1>for any incidents during the night. So Matthew, what she

0:38:06.800 --> 0:38:11.440
<v Speaker 1>would do is go waterproof sheet, then fitted sheet, waterproof

0:38:11.520 --> 0:38:15.840
<v Speaker 1>sheet and then fitted sheet. It's kind of like the

0:38:15.880 --> 0:38:20.399
<v Speaker 1>pasta past. So what she does is like the other

0:38:20.480 --> 0:38:21.800
<v Speaker 1>night when I got up and Oscar piss of the

0:38:21.800 --> 0:38:23.040
<v Speaker 1>bed and you had to sleep in our room because

0:38:23.040 --> 0:38:24.320
<v Speaker 1>it was like, oh, I'm going to get the sheets

0:38:24.320 --> 0:38:26.200
<v Speaker 1>off and change it. Fuck that at three o'clock in

0:38:26.239 --> 0:38:28.080
<v Speaker 1>the morning. It was just getting a bed with us.

0:38:28.320 --> 0:38:31.960
<v Speaker 1>This just ripped the top two layers off. That is

0:38:32.120 --> 0:38:34.200
<v Speaker 1>genius and straight back into bed.

0:38:34.480 --> 0:38:37.960
<v Speaker 2>At the moment, Lola is obsessed with warm water. She's

0:38:38.000 --> 0:38:39.880
<v Speaker 2>not having the milk, and she's waking.

0:38:39.680 --> 0:38:41.719
<v Speaker 1>Up in the middle of the night. She's just obsessed with.

0:38:42.719 --> 0:38:45.360
<v Speaker 2>She's so all or nothing at the moment, dummies and

0:38:45.440 --> 0:38:48.600
<v Speaker 2>warm water. And then she'll have two or three bottles

0:38:48.640 --> 0:38:50.040
<v Speaker 2>of warm water and we try and give her like

0:38:50.040 --> 0:38:52.720
<v Speaker 2>a little bit and she just pisss right through the nappy.

0:38:52.960 --> 0:38:55.560
<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, just like like all nine yeah, and

0:38:55.239 --> 0:38:56.960
<v Speaker 1>then we have to bring her into bed and it's

0:38:57.040 --> 0:39:02.640
<v Speaker 1>just that is genius. That's great from her. Name's Marie Morale. Oh,

0:39:02.920 --> 0:39:05.960
<v Speaker 1>we've got the winner. We have the winner, please, Matthew.

0:39:06.160 --> 0:39:09.680
<v Speaker 1>This week's winner comes from someone by the name of Caitlin. Great.

0:39:09.719 --> 0:39:12.000
<v Speaker 1>This one's come on our email. So she's emailed us,

0:39:12.360 --> 0:39:15.040
<v Speaker 1>which is in the bio of two Doting Dads. It

0:39:15.120 --> 0:39:19.319
<v Speaker 1>is two D D two double D at a look

0:39:19.480 --> 0:39:22.839
<v Speaker 1>dot com correct or you can dms, but email it's

0:39:22.840 --> 0:39:25.360
<v Speaker 1>good too. So it comes from Kaitlyn. And Kaitlyn says,

0:39:25.440 --> 0:39:28.320
<v Speaker 1>our eighteen month old likes to empty out the contents

0:39:28.360 --> 0:39:31.239
<v Speaker 1>of our top bedside draw. What have we got there?

0:39:32.200 --> 0:39:34.160
<v Speaker 1>Her favorite thing to play with is a pair of

0:39:34.239 --> 0:39:41.200
<v Speaker 1>sex dies, amongst some other adult things. She's at a

0:39:41.719 --> 0:39:44.040
<v Speaker 1>she's at the age where it's often just easier to

0:39:44.120 --> 0:39:46.840
<v Speaker 1>let her play with them rather than deal with the tens,

0:39:46.880 --> 0:39:50.400
<v Speaker 1>and so I just let her go. And then she

0:39:50.480 --> 0:39:52.960
<v Speaker 1>goes on to say and says, it was pretty awkward,

0:39:53.040 --> 0:39:55.200
<v Speaker 1>Mum and dad came over and she was playing with sex,

0:39:55.239 --> 0:40:02.239
<v Speaker 1>diyes and lube in the loud. So that is our

0:40:02.280 --> 0:40:06.480
<v Speaker 1>winner for this week. Caitlyn gradually happy, play on. I

0:40:06.560 --> 0:40:09.640
<v Speaker 1>love this segment weekend. It's an absolute crack Like. I

0:40:09.800 --> 0:40:12.239
<v Speaker 1>get a few emails and they're all pretty good.

0:40:12.600 --> 0:40:14.800
<v Speaker 2>Great, great, So Caitlin, we will be in touch. We

0:40:14.840 --> 0:40:16.960
<v Speaker 2>will send you your voucher two hundred bucks worth of

0:40:17.040 --> 0:40:18.160
<v Speaker 2>budget smuggler gear.

0:40:18.480 --> 0:40:21.960
<v Speaker 1>Congratulations. Yes. To finish off today, we're going to just

0:40:22.000 --> 0:40:24.640
<v Speaker 1>do a couple of questions. So every week we answer

0:40:24.719 --> 0:40:28.719
<v Speaker 1>the questions of this great nation. They rely on us

0:40:28.800 --> 0:40:34.319
<v Speaker 1>heavily to answer these questions. But also don't take any

0:40:34.360 --> 0:40:35.239
<v Speaker 1>advice that we give you.

0:40:35.480 --> 0:40:38.520
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, if you have a question, please send it through. Yes,

0:40:38.760 --> 0:40:40.880
<v Speaker 2>we would love to hear from the parents of this country.

0:40:41.120 --> 0:40:42.680
<v Speaker 2>It gives me great pride.

0:40:42.360 --> 0:40:44.839
<v Speaker 1>Of any country. But don't just pigeonhole us. No. Yeah,

0:40:44.840 --> 0:40:48.359
<v Speaker 1>I'll take anything, any country from around the world. I'll

0:40:48.480 --> 0:40:52.319
<v Speaker 1>take it. I would you like to go first? Oh? Yeah, okay, sure,

0:40:52.480 --> 0:40:57.080
<v Speaker 1>why not? I'll go first? All right? Matthew. What do

0:40:57.200 --> 0:41:00.720
<v Speaker 1>you enjoy doing for your wife that you know helps

0:41:00.760 --> 0:41:06.560
<v Speaker 1>them out? Absolutely nothing too. There's a few things that

0:41:06.719 --> 0:41:11.240
<v Speaker 1>I do you are a very doting dad, guilty guilty

0:41:11.280 --> 0:41:13.719
<v Speaker 1>loving husband has charged? Well, that's what I'll say at

0:41:13.760 --> 0:41:15.920
<v Speaker 1>your funeral, will be like he was a very doting

0:41:16.080 --> 0:41:22.839
<v Speaker 1>dad loving husband. My now wife, Laura, allow anywhere near

0:41:23.320 --> 0:41:26.080
<v Speaker 1>my funeral. You miss completely miss my joke. You know

0:41:26.120 --> 0:41:29.400
<v Speaker 1>I heard it. I fucking heard it. Mine now wife

0:41:29.520 --> 0:41:35.919
<v Speaker 1>and step children. I have my sister wives, able and Laura.

0:41:37.960 --> 0:41:43.000
<v Speaker 1>Laura is a big fan. She is at her absolute

0:41:43.160 --> 0:41:49.040
<v Speaker 1>happiest slash horniest when the house is clean.

0:41:49.160 --> 0:41:52.120
<v Speaker 2>If the house is dirty, which it often is with

0:41:52.239 --> 0:41:56.040
<v Speaker 2>two kids, it's very unlikely that she would be in

0:41:56.120 --> 0:42:00.600
<v Speaker 2>the mood. But actually, like we have a fortnight. We

0:42:00.680 --> 0:42:02.719
<v Speaker 2>have a cleaner come through on a Thursday and gives

0:42:02.800 --> 0:42:03.520
<v Speaker 2>us a little.

0:42:03.280 --> 0:42:08.080
<v Speaker 1>Hand just having sex with the clean don't let me

0:42:08.120 --> 0:42:10.719
<v Speaker 1>out like that man, come on. Yeah, And like Laura

0:42:10.840 --> 0:42:12.839
<v Speaker 1>comes home, it's like fuck, yeah, I got to wash

0:42:12.880 --> 0:42:15.200
<v Speaker 1>that clean and whip around mouse that mop.

0:42:15.640 --> 0:42:18.880
<v Speaker 2>She loves it when it's spotless, and I will like

0:42:19.600 --> 0:42:22.399
<v Speaker 2>sometimes I'll like, you know, I'll just vacuum the floor,

0:42:22.480 --> 0:42:24.920
<v Speaker 2>I'll put the washing away because she comes home. And

0:42:25.040 --> 0:42:27.960
<v Speaker 2>it's more so like I'll only do the tasks that

0:42:28.160 --> 0:42:30.640
<v Speaker 2>have strong visual Yeah, yeah, yeah.

0:42:30.560 --> 0:42:32.719
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, like I won't do like it's like these they

0:42:32.760 --> 0:42:35.000
<v Speaker 1>put the good apples at the front. Similar thing. Yes,

0:42:35.160 --> 0:42:37.439
<v Speaker 1>you're like, okay, what does she see when she walks

0:42:37.520 --> 0:42:40.360
<v Speaker 1>in if there's no shoes and stuff on the entrance

0:42:40.440 --> 0:42:41.040
<v Speaker 1>to the how.

0:42:45.200 --> 0:42:47.080
<v Speaker 2>And then when she walks through and she sees at

0:42:47.080 --> 0:42:50.440
<v Speaker 2>the kitchen table, She's just that's just the dumping ground

0:42:50.560 --> 0:42:51.960
<v Speaker 2>of all the clearings.

0:42:52.040 --> 0:42:54.200
<v Speaker 1>And I'm like, you know, I just I'll hide that

0:42:54.480 --> 0:42:59.040
<v Speaker 1>in like closet somewhere with rubbish bags. She's like, all

0:42:59.080 --> 0:43:01.480
<v Speaker 1>she cares about is just she gets weaker than these.

0:43:01.600 --> 0:43:01.799
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:43:02.040 --> 0:43:07.160
<v Speaker 1>Literally, she's like, man, and then the icing on the cake,

0:43:07.280 --> 0:43:10.120
<v Speaker 1>the cremedther crem is. I'm very guilty.

0:43:10.160 --> 0:43:12.719
<v Speaker 2>I take my clothes off and if it's worn but

0:43:12.880 --> 0:43:15.080
<v Speaker 2>not dirty enough to be put in the laundry.

0:43:14.800 --> 0:43:18.520
<v Speaker 1>But it's floor drope. Yes, yeah, and I'm so guilty

0:43:18.560 --> 0:43:21.120
<v Speaker 1>of it. I know you are, as he's every couple

0:43:21.400 --> 0:43:24.320
<v Speaker 1>and every man. Hence the video I have made on

0:43:24.480 --> 0:43:27.160
<v Speaker 1>that where it's kind of like you're gonna put this

0:43:27.239 --> 0:43:29.040
<v Speaker 1>in the washing. They're not dirty, he put them away.

0:43:29.040 --> 0:43:31.799
<v Speaker 1>They're clean. Well, they're not exactly clean. It's the halfway pile.

0:43:32.080 --> 0:43:34.080
<v Speaker 1>There needs to be a better invention for where that

0:43:34.120 --> 0:43:37.879
<v Speaker 1>stuff can be called a chair. That's the next thing.

0:43:38.480 --> 0:43:41.040
<v Speaker 1>I put my clothes away and Laura sees that the

0:43:41.160 --> 0:43:48.120
<v Speaker 1>bedroom is clean. Well, yeah, it's on business. Damn they

0:43:48.200 --> 0:43:50.640
<v Speaker 1>not keep her off me. Yeah, that's what I do.

0:43:50.760 --> 0:43:53.359
<v Speaker 1>What do you do? What do I do? Oh? Look?

0:43:54.520 --> 0:43:57.239
<v Speaker 1>Oh look do you know what I do? Or do nothing?

0:43:57.560 --> 0:43:59.680
<v Speaker 1>She don't care how drink she gets home, Like, what's

0:43:59.680 --> 0:44:05.279
<v Speaker 1>for dinner? Look? I cook? I cook every night. That's

0:44:05.320 --> 0:44:09.440
<v Speaker 1>my thing. Like last night I cooked and then I

0:44:09.760 --> 0:44:11.439
<v Speaker 1>did all the washing up and we were on the phone.

0:44:11.480 --> 0:44:15.120
<v Speaker 1>I just went into autopiloted. And if I'm just happy,

0:44:15.800 --> 0:44:19.520
<v Speaker 1>if she says thanks babe, and then she can go off,

0:44:19.920 --> 0:44:22.319
<v Speaker 1>have a shower, go and read and let me let

0:44:22.360 --> 0:44:27.360
<v Speaker 1>me be what I'm doing. Love it. That is just beautiful,

0:44:28.120 --> 0:44:33.640
<v Speaker 1>kind of sad. Okay, last question, what is the best

0:44:33.719 --> 0:44:39.160
<v Speaker 1>thing about having two kids? Very good question, because you'd

0:44:39.239 --> 0:44:41.600
<v Speaker 1>think that there's not a lot of good things other

0:44:41.719 --> 0:44:48.640
<v Speaker 1>than twice the love, I would say, And I had

0:44:48.680 --> 0:44:52.160
<v Speaker 1>a moment the other day where me, Macey and Osca

0:44:52.239 --> 0:44:54.960
<v Speaker 1>went to the park. Okay, and I had a moment

0:44:55.000 --> 0:44:57.680
<v Speaker 1>where Macy was in the swing, and swing's a great

0:44:57.680 --> 0:45:00.520
<v Speaker 1>one because you could just be like yeah, I but

0:45:01.520 --> 0:45:04.840
<v Speaker 1>Oscar started pushing Macy on the swing and I just

0:45:05.040 --> 0:45:08.239
<v Speaker 1>sat down and I was like, how fucking good is this?

0:45:09.200 --> 0:45:11.360
<v Speaker 1>This is why you have two so that the older

0:45:11.440 --> 0:45:14.360
<v Speaker 1>one can eventually take over your duties as the parent.

0:45:15.320 --> 0:45:17.480
<v Speaker 1>That is the best thing about having two kids.

0:45:17.600 --> 0:45:20.840
<v Speaker 2>And next week Oscar will be on the podcast, should

0:45:20.840 --> 0:45:21.920
<v Speaker 2>be on the couch drinking beer.

0:45:22.040 --> 0:45:27.080
<v Speaker 1>We'll be divorced. So how was your week, He'd be like,

0:45:27.200 --> 0:45:28.640
<v Speaker 1>I had a kidney on Wednesday.

0:45:30.400 --> 0:45:32.920
<v Speaker 2>When when the kids start playing with each other nicely,

0:45:33.560 --> 0:45:36.279
<v Speaker 2>it is a beautiful thing, and it doesn't last that

0:45:36.400 --> 0:45:40.360
<v Speaker 2>long because often anything that Lola touches, Lola is for

0:45:40.360 --> 0:45:43.320
<v Speaker 2>those who aren't familiar, Lola is two for me, Marley

0:45:43.440 --> 0:45:44.879
<v Speaker 2>is four lower touches anything.

0:45:44.960 --> 0:45:47.200
<v Speaker 1>She's two for you, she two for everybody else. I

0:45:47.280 --> 0:45:52.560
<v Speaker 1>can see how you can find that funny is fucking terrible.

0:45:53.719 --> 0:45:54.480
<v Speaker 1>Two for everyone.

0:45:55.239 --> 0:45:58.200
<v Speaker 2>But anything that Lola touches anything at all, Mary's like,

0:45:58.400 --> 0:46:00.279
<v Speaker 2>oh I fuck, it was just about to grab I

0:46:00.400 --> 0:46:03.400
<v Speaker 2>want it now, And so that often ends in an argument.

0:46:03.520 --> 0:46:05.920
<v Speaker 1>It's like that video I made of George Stanza, and

0:46:06.160 --> 0:46:09.799
<v Speaker 1>that literally as soon as I saw that, I was.

0:46:09.800 --> 0:46:12.799
<v Speaker 2>Like that is what it's like having to Lola will

0:46:12.840 --> 0:46:15.800
<v Speaker 2>touch the play dough and then Marley's like, I was

0:46:15.840 --> 0:46:19.000
<v Speaker 2>just about to play with that, and then I can

0:46:19.120 --> 0:46:21.040
<v Speaker 2>like coax it out of Lola give it to Marley

0:46:21.120 --> 0:46:23.440
<v Speaker 2>and Marley's having and then Lola will then grab like

0:46:23.520 --> 0:46:25.640
<v Speaker 2>the soccer ball and Then's like, well, that's my soccer

0:46:25.680 --> 0:46:26.160
<v Speaker 2>ball as well.

0:46:26.280 --> 0:46:29.360
<v Speaker 1>The worst is when they like I had it first

0:46:30.400 --> 0:46:32.200
<v Speaker 1>and it was like you have it three days ago.

0:46:34.280 --> 0:46:35.040
<v Speaker 1>It's a nightmare.

0:46:35.080 --> 0:46:38.279
<v Speaker 2>But then there are moments, very brief moments like you know,

0:46:38.360 --> 0:46:40.040
<v Speaker 2>we have a little doll house up in their room,

0:46:40.080 --> 0:46:42.000
<v Speaker 2>and then I can hear them playing and I can

0:46:42.080 --> 0:46:45.120
<v Speaker 2>like just like pop my head like just ever so

0:46:45.280 --> 0:46:46.919
<v Speaker 2>slightly in the doorway and I can see them playing,

0:46:46.960 --> 0:46:49.480
<v Speaker 2>and they're playing like moms and dads, and it's just

0:46:50.160 --> 0:46:54.400
<v Speaker 2>warm as my cold dead heart. When they're being a

0:46:54.480 --> 0:46:58.960
<v Speaker 2>happy like a year and a half between, they're pretty close. Yeah,

0:46:59.280 --> 0:47:01.160
<v Speaker 2>and like no that they may grow up to be

0:47:01.280 --> 0:47:01.840
<v Speaker 2>best friends.

0:47:01.920 --> 0:47:04.160
<v Speaker 1>Maybe all they might hate each other. I'm sure they will. Yeah,

0:47:04.239 --> 0:47:06.600
<v Speaker 1>I'm sure they will. It's beautiful and like Oscar is

0:47:06.680 --> 0:47:09.320
<v Speaker 1>like the same. But anyway, update on Oscar just before

0:47:09.360 --> 0:47:11.879
<v Speaker 1>we go, before we let the good people of all

0:47:12.000 --> 0:47:16.120
<v Speaker 1>the nations go update on Oscar. From the start of

0:47:16.200 --> 0:47:20.160
<v Speaker 1>this conversation, we have you started laughing. We have received

0:47:20.560 --> 0:47:24.960
<v Speaker 1>communication that Oscar needs to be picked up from KINDI okay,

0:47:25.480 --> 0:47:28.279
<v Speaker 1>so not only have I paid for the day, now

0:47:28.440 --> 0:47:30.279
<v Speaker 1>he's got to spend the day here, so I'll better

0:47:30.360 --> 0:47:33.520
<v Speaker 1>go on do that. Yes, and oh he made it

0:47:33.600 --> 0:47:36.879
<v Speaker 1>to one thirty. Yeah, that's pretty good, so look, thank

0:47:36.920 --> 0:47:39.680
<v Speaker 1>you again. Oh can I just say one thing? Yes, Ash,

0:47:40.080 --> 0:47:40.560
<v Speaker 1>you know this.

0:47:41.600 --> 0:47:44.640
<v Speaker 2>The good people of this podcast don't know this. On

0:47:44.760 --> 0:47:48.759
<v Speaker 2>the sixteenth of September, which is a Saturday, I'm going

0:47:48.840 --> 0:47:51.680
<v Speaker 2>to be taking on a new job as chief packing

0:47:51.760 --> 0:47:56.239
<v Speaker 2>Officer at ALDI, albeit at Brookvale Brooker Deval, which is

0:47:56.360 --> 0:47:57.200
<v Speaker 2>your neck of the words.

0:47:57.239 --> 0:48:00.800
<v Speaker 1>Ash. For two bucks, I will pack you at the

0:48:00.920 --> 0:48:04.839
<v Speaker 1>checkout because Matt really needs the money. Times are tough

0:48:04.880 --> 0:48:07.200
<v Speaker 1>for this podcast is not making us any money anymore.

0:48:07.840 --> 0:48:08.960
<v Speaker 1>So I'm now at Aldi.

0:48:09.239 --> 0:48:12.200
<v Speaker 2>All that money that's donated will then go to Camp

0:48:12.320 --> 0:48:13.839
<v Speaker 2>Quality for Kids with cancer.

0:48:13.880 --> 0:48:17.000
<v Speaker 1>Two bucks rip off. I think that's two bucks are back.

0:48:17.120 --> 0:48:20.120
<v Speaker 2>I was saying, yeah, or the whole lot per shopper,

0:48:20.280 --> 0:48:21.279
<v Speaker 2>per shopper two bucks.

0:48:21.640 --> 0:48:23.600
<v Speaker 1>It's like me and a bunch of shoppers get together

0:48:23.600 --> 0:48:27.680
<v Speaker 1>and be like, look, we can all chip in twenty cents. No,

0:48:27.800 --> 0:48:29.680
<v Speaker 1>it is for a good cause. Christ I'm going to

0:48:29.719 --> 0:48:32.080
<v Speaker 1>come down. That's a lie. I'm not going to come down.

0:48:32.160 --> 0:48:35.080
<v Speaker 1>You won't look if I'm going to come down. I

0:48:35.239 --> 0:48:37.520
<v Speaker 1>really wanted to come down to shame you, but I

0:48:37.680 --> 0:48:41.040
<v Speaker 1>feel because it's for charity, I can't do that. You

0:48:41.080 --> 0:48:42.799
<v Speaker 1>can shame me if you want. Okay, cool wi heckle

0:48:42.840 --> 0:48:44.160
<v Speaker 1>me hit the checkout. I was going to bring a

0:48:44.160 --> 0:48:48.480
<v Speaker 1>bunch of my mates down. Yeah. Nothing, Well, I don't

0:48:48.480 --> 0:48:50.040
<v Speaker 1>know if I should wear the short shorts or like

0:48:50.200 --> 0:48:54.279
<v Speaker 1>pants short shorts, Yeah, get the pins out. Laura doesn't

0:48:54.360 --> 0:48:58.600
<v Speaker 1>like him regress, talk about what she likes. I'm doing it.

0:48:58.800 --> 0:49:00.960
<v Speaker 1>I'm doing it for you a bit. The missus from

0:49:00.960 --> 0:49:04.120
<v Speaker 1>Bondey as well. Every there. He already text me, he said,

0:49:04.600 --> 0:49:06.120
<v Speaker 1>make sure you convince him to weather short.

0:49:08.120 --> 0:49:11.279
<v Speaker 2>So yeah, sixteen Saturday, Aldi brook Vale, all for good cause,

0:49:11.280 --> 0:49:13.480
<v Speaker 2>for cant quality and as you've got to go pick

0:49:13.560 --> 0:49:16.000
<v Speaker 2>up Oscar, we should.

0:49:15.760 --> 0:49:19.360
<v Speaker 1>Get out of here. If you enjoyed today's sorry, please

0:49:19.960 --> 0:49:23.399
<v Speaker 1>if you enjoyed today's episodes, please hit subscribe button. Send

0:49:23.400 --> 0:49:25.640
<v Speaker 1>it to someone that could use a per cup, A

0:49:25.840 --> 0:49:30.080
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0:49:30.400 --> 0:49:35.600
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0:49:35.680 --> 0:49:39.040
<v Speaker 1>us on our Instagram, what said and we love you.

0:49:42.960 --> 0:49:54.080
<v Speaker 1>Clearly I need to go so yeah two.

0:49:54.160 --> 0:49:57.920
<v Speaker 2>Doting Dad's podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout

0:49:58.000 --> 0:50:01.240
<v Speaker 2>Australia and the connections to land, see and community.

0:50:01.520 --> 0:50:04.000
<v Speaker 1>We pay our respects to their elders past and present

0:50:04.120 --> 0:50:07.200
<v Speaker 1>and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestrate Islander

0:50:07.239 --> 0:50:10.839
<v Speaker 1>peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land