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Speaker 1: I got spotted last Saturday. Oh for the first time

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Speaker 1: we got spotted.

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Speaker 2: We've been spotted before, so this is the second spotting.

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Speaker 2: Do you remember we were going to the Super Bowl?

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, and a lady was like, hey, hey, love

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Speaker 1: you as you Matt Or is it the time when

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Speaker 1: I got spotted and then you got you're verbally abused?

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Speaker 2: Do you want to tell that story? Let me do

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Speaker 2: the intro first, and then you can tell that story

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Speaker 2: if you want.

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Speaker 3: Okay, Yeah, Welcome to two Dodding Dads.

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Speaker 1: I'm Mattie Jay and I'm Ash. This is a podcast

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Speaker 1: that is all about parenting. It's the good, the bad,

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Speaker 1: and the bad, I mean, and the related It's all bad,

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Speaker 1: all right and more bad. There are many experts out

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Speaker 1: there in the world of parenting, many other experts, not us.

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Speaker 1: We are far from experts. If you're coming for advice,

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Speaker 1: to stop it, stop it right now. This is your

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Speaker 1: first time. There's no advice here. You've been warned. And

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Speaker 1: before I forget.

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Speaker 2: We ran a competition on our socials to win two

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Speaker 2: brand new baby Beyond Harmony carriers, and I'm stoked to

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Speaker 2: say that we have a winner. It is Sarah Arts.

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Speaker 2: Congratulations will be in touch to send out to brand

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Speaker 2: new carriers to you asap ash. Yes, I didn't think

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Speaker 2: we'd tell the story, but you can tell it if

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Speaker 2: you like.

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Speaker 1: Yes, So we were just talking about Matt got spotted.

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Speaker 1: I got spotted. It was at the market, A two

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Speaker 1: doting dad's spotty. Yes, he just said, he just said dad,

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Speaker 1: which is great because normally I only get spotted by

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Speaker 1: the female. Did you joke him off? Afterward? I was like,

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Speaker 1: I'm here, You've deserved it, reach around on you and

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Speaker 1: he just yelled out and said, hey, two doting dads.

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Speaker 1: And before I was like, I was ready for a

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Speaker 1: full blown convo. Let's go want to That's all he

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Speaker 1: wanted And I was there with lube in one hand, like,

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Speaker 1: what about I have said that if someone leaves us

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Speaker 1: a review or we would jerk them on. Would Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's a fair trait, but I mean, I know it's

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Speaker 1: all it's nice and new for you to be spotted

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Speaker 1: or recognized somewhat used to it. So just like the

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Speaker 1: other day, for those of you who weren't there, which

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Speaker 1: is all of you listening, Matt and I were at

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Speaker 1: our producer Keisha's thirtieth birthday, Happy birthday. Cache at it

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Speaker 1: and we had a lovely lunch. We did have a

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Speaker 1: lovely lunch of beer, yes, and some taco taco things,

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Speaker 1: and it was a bit of a weird met I

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Speaker 1: said it was like being in a Chinese man's basement

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Speaker 1: eating Mexican food. That's kind of the theme.

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Speaker 2: It was quite sure what cuisine it wanted to be,

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Speaker 2: but it was like a bottomless margaritas.

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Speaker 1: They do this thing, it's called fusion, so now they

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Speaker 1: could just like I fuse everything together. It's like when

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Speaker 1: I buy a cheeseburger and mc nuggets and I put

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Speaker 1: mc nuggets on the cheeseburg fusure. We had a lovely

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Speaker 1: lunch and then as we're getting up to leave, a

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Speaker 1: table of young ladies and their partners said to me, oh,

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Speaker 1: can we get a photo with you me specifically very enthusiastic.

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Speaker 1: They just I think it was did you get your

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Speaker 1: shirt grabbed? They grab your shirt or is.

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Speaker 2: It an arm pul They were scurrying towards it to

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Speaker 2: stop you when you desperate?

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Speaker 1: Yes, no, they weren't desperate. It was a mister. They

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Speaker 1: asked if they could take MAT's Oh take the phone.

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Speaker 2: Hang on hang on, can I just just chime in

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Speaker 2: for a second. They were so enthusiastic, they were so

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Speaker 2: starstruck by seeing ash Aka jam pikelets in the flesh.

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Speaker 2: There was like a moment of like, you know, they

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Speaker 2: almost couldn't get the words. Look, and I saw it,

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Speaker 2: and I thought, you know what, I'll be the nice guy.

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Speaker 1: And I said, excuse me? Would I thought? You said,

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Speaker 1: you're going to let me tell this it?

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Speaker 2: Would you like me to take a photo? That's what

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Speaker 2: I said, nice guy, Nice guy?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, in which they said, yeah, of course that'd be great. Look,

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Speaker 1: they did have a they had a belly full of piss,

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Speaker 1: let's be honest, okay, And it was bottom as Marca.

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Speaker 1: Everyone was well lubricated in the venture. Yeah. And then

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Speaker 1: I grabbed the phone. Yeah, okay, you were already kneeling down.

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Speaker 1: I was sitting. But it was funny. They also had that,

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Speaker 1: Remember they had the tablecloths over there to imitate how

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Speaker 1: I do my content?

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Speaker 2: Yes, And I simply said, because it was you know

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Speaker 2: we're talking about it was like a basement. It was

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Speaker 2: very poorly lit. It was very dark, okay, And I

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Speaker 2: looked through the leno first.

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Speaker 1: You're also slightly hurt in your eyes. She looked at

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Speaker 1: me and she's like listening. He was, don't reverse the

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Speaker 1: camera and take a bloody photo of yourself, take a

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Speaker 1: fucking photo of yourself. And she's like, don't do it.

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Speaker 2: You know, the old gag of like yeah, and I thought,

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Speaker 2: never entered.

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Speaker 1: My car, and now you're gonna do it.

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Speaker 2: And then I said, I looked through the camera like

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Speaker 2: screen and it was so dark, and I said, do

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Speaker 2: you want to flash or no flash?

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Speaker 1: That's right, A very simple question in which because some.

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Speaker 2: People are very like, yeah I flash. Some people all

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Speaker 2: for the flash, and so I just wanted to you know.

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Speaker 1: You were just trying to be a good photographer. What

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Speaker 1: was the response. You looked at me, dead in the

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Speaker 1: eye and said, just take the fucking photo. And look, honestly,

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Speaker 1: it was very aggressive, but you did take it a

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Speaker 1: little bit too. You didn't have a diva moment, Matt.

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Speaker 1: You stormed off. You stormed off, and I was like no.

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Speaker 1: I was like, he's hurt. Yeah, you were gutted, and honestly,

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Speaker 1: you weren't very happy about it, and you dev it

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Speaker 1: out the door. I threw the phone back and I said,

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Speaker 1: you take the fucking photo, which we get it. You

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Speaker 1: were hurt. How do you want me to respond? I

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Speaker 1: just want you.

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Speaker 2: I'm like helping someone out. It's like if you're changing

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Speaker 2: someone's car tire that's flat, and you're.

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Speaker 1: Like, you're probably getting paid for that.

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Speaker 2: No, if you're given your time and you're like, hey,

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Speaker 2: do you want is the spare in the trunk?

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Speaker 1: Just moment you change the fucking tire?

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Speaker 2: Like that's like, hey, I don't have to, I'm not

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Speaker 2: a photographer. You did, I could be enjoying.

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Speaker 1: I was even calling you a diva at the time,

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Speaker 1: just to really rough this. Just sal you know where

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Speaker 1: your fucking allegiance lies. Anyway, And you saw you coaxed

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Speaker 1: your back over. You were like, he's always like this.

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Speaker 1: That's after a few drinks, it gets like No. I

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Speaker 1: was like, oh, look, he's really upset that you didn't

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Speaker 1: recognize him and then made him take the voter. So

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Speaker 1: I came back. You came back after you had after

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Speaker 1: you threw your fucking toys out of the cot. You

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Speaker 1: came back, took me idiocre photo, and then we moved

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Speaker 1: on with our lives. Look, honestly, they did say they're

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Speaker 1: from the Central coast and they're like, fuy, Yeah, they

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Speaker 1: were pretty. They were pretty lit up.

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Speaker 2: So I think her friend knew that the one who

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Speaker 2: had said those.

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Speaker 1: Who was too much? It was too much. Now. We

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Speaker 1: all got together later and were like, how about Matt

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Speaker 1: just worm off like a diva. You're going to be

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Speaker 1: just a punching bag for people. Yes, spear pin cushion,

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Speaker 1: that's who you need to be, or knock her out.

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Speaker 1: I'm just whushka.

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Speaker 2: I did throw the phone back with like like a mallet,

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Speaker 2: pitch mallet.

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Speaker 1: I'm glad it made you happy. It did. It made

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Speaker 1: me really happy because it was really really funny.

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Speaker 2: You know, you're a sensitive guy, and so when when

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Speaker 2: you're taking a photo and one of my fans is like,

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Speaker 2: just take the fucking photo.

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Speaker 1: I'll do as I'm told.

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Speaker 2: Anyway, Anyway, how are you You've had a stress? We

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Speaker 2: both had stress, morning Mate.

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Speaker 1: Karma has really really really hit me today. So in

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Speaker 1: the last episode we spoke about when I do the

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Speaker 1: kidney drop off, and I'm like, your problem got a

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Speaker 1: little bit rins from a few child to educators. Get

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Speaker 1: out of yourself. So yes, it's karma, yeah, and I'll

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Speaker 1: copy it. I'll cop it on the chin. I'm not

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Speaker 1: going to send someone a rude comment about it, but yeah,

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Speaker 1: I feel like this morning I had to do drop off.

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Speaker 1: My wife had to go to work early this morning,

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Speaker 1: which is fine, she's allowed to. She's a powerful woman. Apparently,

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Speaker 1: well said thank you, Just fucking shut up and listen

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Speaker 1: and just melt down. After meltdown, sobbing. Who was it

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Speaker 1: which Oscar? So? Oscar knows what day it is. Macy

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Speaker 1: doesn't know what's going on. She's like, it's light outside

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Speaker 1: or it's dark outside. That's as much as she knows.

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Speaker 1: She was okay, but she was feeding off his energy.

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Speaker 1: So this morning woke up, we're all in my bed. Whatever,

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Speaker 1: mum's gotta go go instant meltdown. Now, Oscar goes to

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Speaker 1: two kindys. One he likes, when he does not like

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Speaker 1: so much because he's getting a little bit older and

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Speaker 1: he likes the older one. Goes back to that one.

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Speaker 1: The one he doesn't like. Is that just a Wednesday

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Speaker 1: Wednesday Thursday? Yeah, it's good for me, bad for him.

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Speaker 1: And he just was uncontrollably sobbing. Oh it was different,

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Speaker 1: and I was like, this is payback. I was trying

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Speaker 1: to reason with him because I have Macy off on Thursdays.

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Speaker 1: And I was like, look tomorrow, like my dad's down,

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Speaker 1: my mom's down. I was like, well, you can come

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Speaker 1: with us tomorrow. You don't have to go tomorrow, but

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Speaker 1: we just need to get done today because I've got

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Speaker 1: too much to do. A great offer. Yeah yeah, And

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Speaker 1: he was like yeah for about one second and then

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Speaker 1: he's just sobbing everything. Literally. I was like, what do

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Speaker 1: you want for breakfast? Rice bubbles? So he's eating rice

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Speaker 1: pubbles that little table there, sobbing into his life.

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Speaker 2: He was like like command what he got broken up with?

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Speaker 1: And then Macy's sitting acrost with him, and Macy goes

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Speaker 1: she's at the moment she's really into doing thumbs up,

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Speaker 1: and she goes big thumb up, but she does love

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Speaker 1: this like the back of the hand towards the person.

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Speaker 1: That's the right way to do it. That's it. And

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Speaker 1: he just was like, I don't want a thumbs up.

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Speaker 1: But I was just like, oh my god. Anyway, I

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Speaker 1: had to take a few deep breaths and I said, Okay,

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Speaker 1: it's all right, it's okay. Trying to be patient but

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Speaker 1: also getting very frustrated, and because it's.

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Speaker 2: Just every everything, every mouthful is a punished And I

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Speaker 2: was like, okay, let's go, let's all go upstairs, let's

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Speaker 2: go get dressed together.

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Speaker 1: It's nice up there, the sun's out on the balcony there,

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Speaker 1: into a nicer environment. She's still like like I'm good,

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Speaker 1: but then she was sort of getting upset because he

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Speaker 1: was getting upset and I was getting upset. And then

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Speaker 1: I was like, it's going to be warm today, and

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Speaker 1: I was like, just put some shorts on, and he

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Speaker 1: was like, okay, no worries, and then he's just like

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Speaker 1: putting a sock on, so slow, sobbing like morning pretty much.

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Speaker 1: Did you want to FaceTime April just to nah? Because

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Speaker 1: she was on the bas I did ring her and

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Speaker 1: I was.

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Speaker 2: Like, because sometimes you want to make him know what

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Speaker 2: you're dealing with.

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Speaker 1: I was like, I don't know what to do. Like

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Speaker 1: I was nearly going to be like, he's going to

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Speaker 1: have to be here today because he was just so distraught,

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Speaker 1: which I felt really bad about, but I just had

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Speaker 1: too much on today. April was not here anyway, So

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Speaker 1: we came back downstairs and he's like, oh, I'm cold.

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Speaker 1: I was like, okay, well, why don't you go and

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Speaker 1: put some pants on? Then? If you do, I didn't

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Speaker 1: make himself through the cold. Like this was the eighties

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Speaker 1: or fifties, they'd be like, suck it up, like suck

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Speaker 1: it up. It was in the country, suck it up,

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Speaker 1: go and melt the cows. He went upstairs and I

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Speaker 1: was like cleaning up a little bit. Macy's having a

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Speaker 1: sulk about something or whatever. I was like, oh, like,

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Speaker 1: you're right, buddy, trying to just keep my tone nice, gentle,

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Speaker 1: Oh are you okay, buddy? Like, because I also need

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Speaker 1: to get them out of the door.

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Speaker 2: Because when they were in that kind of mood, as

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Speaker 2: soon as you raise your voice, just like a smith,

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Speaker 2: just as soon as like any change in tone sets

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Speaker 2: them off again.

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Speaker 1: And he was already like the poor kid, like his

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Speaker 1: eyes like he hadn't slept in days because he just

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Speaker 1: cried for an hour straight, sobbed like I felt terrible.

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Speaker 1: But anyway, I was like, oh, like, are you okay, buddy,

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Speaker 1: like calling out up the stairs and he's like no.

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, what what is it?

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Speaker 1: And he was like, I can't get my feet through

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Speaker 1: the holes. I walk upstairs and he's trying to put

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Speaker 1: tracksuit pants on with his shoes still and his feet

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Speaker 1: as stuck in the bottom bit like that. The rubbers

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Speaker 1: just caught onto the cuff of the pant and he

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Speaker 1: is just full. He's wailing at this point, and I

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Speaker 1: fuck anyway, I'm up there, fixed him up, promised him

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Speaker 1: heap chocolate, and Macy wanted I had to give him

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Speaker 1: the same. So eventually we got to kindIn. He had

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Speaker 1: a little cry there and then he's out the window,

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Speaker 1: out the window waving like sobbing, and I thought I

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Speaker 1: got in the car. I went I brought this upon

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Speaker 1: myself last week by saying fucking see us later.

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Speaker 2: The early educators of this country heard. Then they've cast

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Speaker 2: a spell over Ashton Wicks. May his children be fucking

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Speaker 2: moody forever.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it was like and then you know, I did.

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Speaker 1: I did actually feel bad because I was like, wait,

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Speaker 1: what path I felt bad until I got my can't

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Speaker 1: drive away.

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Speaker 2: In those situations when you drop them off a daycare,

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Speaker 2: do you just drop and run?

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Speaker 1: Because you know, sometimes that's exactly what I would do.

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Speaker 1: Clean break is good, clean, bright, And like today I

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Speaker 1: was like, this is payback for all the other times

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Speaker 1: I've just dropped and ran like this was not like

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Speaker 1: a wingy, annoying cry, like just this was he was

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Speaker 1: legitimately sad and I actually felt for it heart. Yeah

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Speaker 1: it did. It actually did. And then I was like,

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Speaker 1: thank god, will you pick him up early, Papa, pick

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Speaker 1: him up early today? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah. My kids.

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Speaker 2: Also, you called and Lola was screaming in the background.

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Speaker 1: It was just it's the moon. The moon. It's not

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Speaker 1: the blue moon or the red moon. I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I feel like it was funny because Lola's screaming in

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Speaker 1: the background. And then you got Marley on the phone going, ash,

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Speaker 1: I can click, I can click. I was like, I

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Speaker 1: don't know, how do I read the room? Yeah?

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Speaker 2: It took me an hour and a half to get

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Speaker 2: out the door. This morning, just one of those mornings.

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Speaker 1: Anything sense so easily.

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Speaker 2: One second they're having the time of their life, like

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Speaker 2: we're in the same thing, We're in bed, everyone's like whoo.

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Speaker 2: I showed Mali a photo when she was a baby,

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Speaker 2: and she.

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Speaker 1: Was like, oh, Dad, that's cute. Everyone's just like jumping

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Speaker 1: on the bed. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: And then like a split second later, she wanted to

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Speaker 2: do she wanted some drawing and I was like, no,

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Speaker 2: I'm not doing drawing because we're going out of daycare

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Speaker 2: flipping tables. And I was like, oh god, anyway, but hey,

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Speaker 2: I want to speak to about There's two things. Two

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Speaker 2: things that happened to me recently. The first is that

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Speaker 2: I got my Father's Day gift from Laura.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, she very generous.

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Speaker 2: She booked in a massage Swedish Chinese Balinese fusion.

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Speaker 1: I'll take. I'll take. I love a massage. I love

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Speaker 1: a massage.

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Speaker 2: But there's only one thing that I have to explain

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Speaker 2: to the messus when I get a massage.

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Speaker 1: They like, don't laugh at my third nipple. I said

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Speaker 1: to the guy, I said, it was a man.

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Speaker 2: It was a man, which is like, it's good in

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Speaker 2: that it's strong.

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Speaker 1: It's like a nice muscular I what.

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Speaker 2: A firm massage. But I said to him, I'm like,

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Speaker 2: look a lot of tension in my back and shoulders

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Speaker 2: and neck. If you can focus on that area, I've.

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Speaker 1: Got a lot of tension in my back, shoulders, neck, head, feet, arms, buttocks, legs, feet, everything, chest, stomach,

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Speaker 1: A lot of tension. Get to it. And he understood.

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Speaker 1: He's like, yeah, great.

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Speaker 2: He's like oh because you on your laptop and I'm like, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 2: I'm on laptop all the time.

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Speaker 1: You know, I like an email ash you love it.

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Speaker 1: I love it. You opened up your computers today and

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Speaker 1: the first thing that load's like your homepage is linked in.

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Speaker 1: I love it, absolutely love it.

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Speaker 2: I always have, always corporate. And I said, I just

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Speaker 2: don't want my thighs to be done. I get very ticklish,

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Speaker 2: so from the knee.

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Speaker 1: I don't feel like being hypnal with that.

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Speaker 2: And he was like, totally understand. And I said, fit

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Speaker 2: calves fine me to hips noga. And I feel as

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Speaker 2: though during my massage I was touched inappropriately a number

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Speaker 2: of times.

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Speaker 1: How look, it's best that we talk about it now

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Speaker 1: so that the trauma doesn't build up and build up

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Speaker 1: and build up, and then when you're an adult, because

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Speaker 1: you're still a child, you have suffer long term trauma.

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Speaker 2: And I talk about the twenty twenty three Father's Day

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Speaker 2: massage that.

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Speaker 1: And then you end up like mister Freeze across the

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Speaker 1: street here, the local meth head who wills a samurai sorder.

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Speaker 2: Who we will touch upon a little updated. Yes, give

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Speaker 2: an update for people who are like mister Freeese. Don't

336
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Speaker 2: worry Ben, we will tell you what's happening there. So

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00:17:42,040 --> 00:17:44,320
Speaker 2: he did the massage, he did my back and you know,

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Speaker 2: you kind of like you have a gauge of time,

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00:17:47,080 --> 00:17:49,280
Speaker 2: you know, and he touched my back for it must

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Speaker 2: have been ten minutes. And then he was already onto

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Speaker 2: my calves and I thought that's pretty quick. And then

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00:17:55,200 --> 00:17:57,440
Speaker 2: he started then rubbing like my thighs.

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Speaker 1: Why am I getting in a rector?

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Speaker 2: And I thought, maybe he's just got his routine and

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00:18:02,320 --> 00:18:04,800
Speaker 2: we'll get back to the calves. And then he just

346
00:18:04,920 --> 00:18:07,840
Speaker 2: like man, he was just he was working the thighs

347
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Speaker 2: and the ass like he.

348
00:18:09,240 --> 00:18:12,080
Speaker 1: Just was the back of the thigh. Yeah, so maybe

349
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Speaker 1: he just thought you didn't want to do the front

350
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Speaker 1: of the thigh.

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00:18:14,240 --> 00:18:16,920
Speaker 2: I was so specific and I said front back? Did

352
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Speaker 2: you be like dude, well, I didn't want to fucking

353
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Speaker 2: say anything.

354
00:18:20,320 --> 00:18:20,919
Speaker 1: Were you naked?

355
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Speaker 2: I had my budgies on, and I didn't know what

356
00:18:27,560 --> 00:18:29,760
Speaker 2: to say, Like I didn't want to I thought, maybe

357
00:18:29,800 --> 00:18:31,479
Speaker 2: he's going to do it. For a second, I had

358
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Speaker 2: an hour and a half booked in. I never have

359
00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:35,320
Speaker 2: an hour and a half, Like that's a fucking long time.

360
00:18:36,080 --> 00:18:38,280
Speaker 2: And I would say it was like an hour of

361
00:18:38,320 --> 00:18:39,920
Speaker 2: that was on my ass.

362
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Speaker 1: Wow, Happy Father's Day, babe.

363
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Speaker 2: He did this thing where he'd like it wasn't like rubbing.

364
00:18:47,840 --> 00:18:49,280
Speaker 2: It was like he would just push in like a

365
00:18:49,280 --> 00:18:52,320
Speaker 2: pressure point in my ass and then he did then

366
00:18:52,480 --> 00:18:55,520
Speaker 2: like move my leg as he was like putting like.

367
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Speaker 2: It was fucking strange and I've had this headache ever since.

368
00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:05,320
Speaker 1: Fuck. Look it was that seems traumatic. But Laura, did

369
00:19:05,359 --> 00:19:06,720
Speaker 1: you do the old when you go home and be like,

370
00:19:06,760 --> 00:19:11,320
Speaker 1: but that was great? Laura was like, how was it?

371
00:19:11,320 --> 00:19:12,840
Speaker 1: It was like, I think I might have cheated on

372
00:19:12,880 --> 00:19:19,680
Speaker 1: your It's like getting a heck, it's a fear of mine. Look,

373
00:19:19,760 --> 00:19:24,200
Speaker 1: I don't you hate massages. I hate I hated get

374
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Speaker 1: touched in appropriately. This is a safe place. No no, no.

375
00:19:27,119 --> 00:19:29,560
Speaker 1: Did you go to the saying one in Bondo? No? No, no, no, no, no,

376
00:19:29,640 --> 00:19:32,439
Speaker 1: definitely not on Wall Street. Look, I was a monster,

377
00:19:33,320 --> 00:19:37,560
Speaker 1: so I've heard. It's not that I'm afraid of being

378
00:19:37,720 --> 00:19:40,119
Speaker 1: like touched by man. No, that's not it, because I'm like,

379
00:19:40,240 --> 00:19:42,360
Speaker 1: as you know, a very touchy guy. Can I say

380
00:19:42,359 --> 00:19:43,280
Speaker 1: one more thing? Yeah.

381
00:19:43,400 --> 00:19:45,000
Speaker 2: One of the reasons why I don't like a man

382
00:19:45,440 --> 00:19:48,560
Speaker 2: to give me massage is the hands are like really rough.

383
00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:50,440
Speaker 2: It was very like the callouses.

384
00:19:50,560 --> 00:19:53,160
Speaker 1: You know, it's like it. So there's a gym goer

385
00:19:53,880 --> 00:19:56,840
Speaker 1: you were that How old was this guy? Forty?

386
00:19:57,680 --> 00:19:59,680
Speaker 2: Very rough hands. It was like being massaged but someone

387
00:19:59,720 --> 00:20:00,800
Speaker 2: was sound paper gloves on.

388
00:20:00,960 --> 00:20:03,520
Speaker 1: I just don't like the feeling of a massage, whether

389
00:20:03,560 --> 00:20:06,639
Speaker 1: it's being from a man or a woman. But the

390
00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:12,119
Speaker 1: last massage, he'll change, perspective, the old made of Bonda,

391
00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:16,200
Speaker 1: he'll change, he'll swing. Yeah. I was in Bali years ago.

392
00:20:16,280 --> 00:20:19,879
Speaker 1: April and I both got a massage at a Ballei place.

393
00:20:20,240 --> 00:20:22,760
Speaker 1: I can't like. I think it was incouder or leg

394
00:20:22,760 --> 00:20:25,720
Speaker 1: you whatever. And this is the last massage I had

395
00:20:25,760 --> 00:20:29,120
Speaker 1: so long before we were even married. I'm talking ten

396
00:20:29,280 --> 00:20:32,520
Speaker 1: years ago since I've had a massage. I don't lie,

397
00:20:33,119 --> 00:20:36,840
Speaker 1: you can, I just don't. I don't like the pressure

398
00:20:36,880 --> 00:20:39,400
Speaker 1: of it. But this particular it was a man as well,

399
00:20:39,520 --> 00:20:42,639
Speaker 1: nice guy whatever, but he literally beat me up. It

400
00:20:42,760 --> 00:20:45,679
Speaker 1: was like a fucking like I like, he was like

401
00:20:45,840 --> 00:20:48,240
Speaker 1: punching my back, like he was taking out some serious

402
00:20:48,280 --> 00:20:51,200
Speaker 1: anger going to town on you. Did you say anything? No,

403
00:20:51,359 --> 00:20:54,240
Speaker 1: because you can't. It's like when your heads I fucked

404
00:20:54,280 --> 00:20:57,080
Speaker 1: your hair up and you're like it was great and

405
00:20:57,119 --> 00:20:58,680
Speaker 1: then you go home and shave your head.

406
00:20:58,560 --> 00:21:01,000
Speaker 2: Dude, the Messus could be hot whax on me, and

407
00:21:01,040 --> 00:21:03,480
Speaker 2: I'd be like, that is lovely, that is beautiful.

408
00:21:03,520 --> 00:21:06,280
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get a third degree by very much great

409
00:21:06,600 --> 00:21:09,200
Speaker 1: and like honestly, like just beat me up and that's

410
00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:11,480
Speaker 1: all I remember. I'm a little bit traumatized from that.

411
00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:13,159
Speaker 1: I think that I'm just like I didn't like that,

412
00:21:13,240 --> 00:21:14,760
Speaker 1: So why would I do something I don't line? Do

413
00:21:14,760 --> 00:21:18,200
Speaker 1: you like massages prior to that? Not really either, I

414
00:21:18,240 --> 00:21:20,280
Speaker 1: don't know, but I think that just firmed up that

415
00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:23,400
Speaker 1: this is not for me. Yeah. Look if someone like

416
00:21:23,400 --> 00:21:25,200
Speaker 1: like when I go on like a roller or something

417
00:21:25,280 --> 00:21:27,840
Speaker 1: like that, I hate that. I hate it, and people

418
00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:32,000
Speaker 1: was like I love getting on the roller. Jesus Christ, Relax,

419
00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:37,679
Speaker 1: Jesus Christ. Does April ever give you a massage? Now?

420
00:21:37,760 --> 00:21:42,280
Speaker 1: She doesn't touch me? Ah nah, because she knows I'm

421
00:21:42,320 --> 00:21:45,320
Speaker 1: not into it. That's just not for me. Speaking of

422
00:21:45,320 --> 00:21:47,920
Speaker 1: father today present, there's a guy who lives across the

423
00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:51,640
Speaker 1: street from me here. First of all, really nice guy,

424
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:54,320
Speaker 1: so nice so that the other night when I went

425
00:21:54,359 --> 00:21:56,880
Speaker 1: out onto the boxing and I got home at like

426
00:21:56,960 --> 00:22:00,000
Speaker 1: two two thirty in the morning. Anyway, it was early

427
00:22:00,160 --> 00:22:02,040
Speaker 1: in the morning, late at night, early in the morning.

428
00:22:02,080 --> 00:22:03,359
Speaker 1: And I saw him a few days later and he

429
00:22:03,359 --> 00:22:05,919
Speaker 1: comes up to me. He goes, he was you okay.

430
00:22:06,240 --> 00:22:09,000
Speaker 1: I was like why. He goes, oh, you wake me

431
00:22:09,080 --> 00:22:11,440
Speaker 1: up the other morning, because that garage is really squeaky.

432
00:22:11,920 --> 00:22:14,440
Speaker 1: And I looked at the window and you were flat

433
00:22:14,480 --> 00:22:18,120
Speaker 1: on your back in the garage. I was like, oh, yeah,

434
00:22:18,160 --> 00:22:20,520
Speaker 1: I'd been out. He was like, how fucked up were you?

435
00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:23,720
Speaker 1: And I was like no. I was like, no, no misunderstanding.

436
00:22:24,119 --> 00:22:26,040
Speaker 1: He was like, I nearly called the ambulance. Did you

437
00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:29,120
Speaker 1: pass out? No? So I was trying to close the garage,

438
00:22:29,359 --> 00:22:31,480
Speaker 1: like I opened a little bit to slide in underneath

439
00:22:32,920 --> 00:22:35,320
Speaker 1: like a cat burglar. He said he nearly called the

440
00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:37,560
Speaker 1: police because he thought and then he realized. He's like,

441
00:22:37,840 --> 00:22:39,360
Speaker 1: he thought we were getting robbed, and then he saw

442
00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:41,480
Speaker 1: me and he thought, oh, he's dead. She's had a

443
00:22:41,480 --> 00:22:44,679
Speaker 1: heart attack. But the reason I was so still is

444
00:22:44,720 --> 00:22:48,919
Speaker 1: because I was edging the garage really really slowly to

445
00:22:48,960 --> 00:22:50,720
Speaker 1: not wake the kids up. Why don't you just get

446
00:22:50,720 --> 00:22:53,520
Speaker 1: some WD forty. I've done it now, I've done the

447
00:22:53,600 --> 00:22:57,000
Speaker 1: WD forty. Yeah. But anyway, he's nice really nice guy.

448
00:22:57,040 --> 00:22:59,960
Speaker 1: But I've been in this house now for too far

449
00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:03,720
Speaker 1: other days, let's call it, and I've noticed something about him.

450
00:23:04,240 --> 00:23:07,199
Speaker 1: And he's a grandfather. And he's got this shirt that

451
00:23:07,240 --> 00:23:11,720
Speaker 1: he wears on both Father's days, which is great. So

452
00:23:11,800 --> 00:23:14,280
Speaker 1: it's a shirt both father's days. So this one and

453
00:23:14,400 --> 00:23:17,640
Speaker 1: last year, I got you, gotcha, confuse you the shit

454
00:23:17,680 --> 00:23:21,520
Speaker 1: out of you. There. I thought maybe he was like English,

455
00:23:21,640 --> 00:23:25,960
Speaker 1: he's American. Actually continue so actually when is American? Father? That?

456
00:23:25,960 --> 00:23:29,200
Speaker 1: I keep tabs on that too. Maybe I've seen it more,

457
00:23:29,320 --> 00:23:33,000
Speaker 1: but anyway, it's a great shirt. It's just a brown shirt,

458
00:23:33,480 --> 00:23:36,359
Speaker 1: classic grandpa brown shirt, and on the back of his

459
00:23:36,560 --> 00:23:40,520
Speaker 1: a photo of him and his granddaughter and it's his

460
00:23:40,680 --> 00:23:45,119
Speaker 1: best friend since two thousand and eight. I love that

461
00:23:45,560 --> 00:23:50,080
Speaker 1: like that, and he like proudly wears it on Father's Day.

462
00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:53,320
Speaker 1: Like that is great. That's like honestly, like you know

463
00:23:53,320 --> 00:23:56,160
Speaker 1: how there was like like my kids love Popper. Yeah,

464
00:23:56,200 --> 00:23:58,840
Speaker 1: like it's like they hate dad but love Popper. Right,

465
00:23:59,359 --> 00:24:02,000
Speaker 1: it's like our best friends. Do you think you get

466
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:05,120
Speaker 1: to that age you don't have any real friends. I'm

467
00:24:05,119 --> 00:24:10,240
Speaker 1: already already at that age, which I think, yeah, super cute.

468
00:24:10,280 --> 00:24:12,679
Speaker 1: But then it made me think about like shit Father's

469
00:24:12,720 --> 00:24:16,520
Speaker 1: Day presence and every year anyone who has kids, kindie,

470
00:24:16,640 --> 00:24:19,080
Speaker 1: they always make a really big effort to make sure

471
00:24:19,119 --> 00:24:22,639
Speaker 1: that you get something from the kids are painting that's

472
00:24:23,400 --> 00:24:28,600
Speaker 1: terrible or something. But I've got a beer cooler that's

473
00:24:28,640 --> 00:24:29,040
Speaker 1: not bad.

474
00:24:29,200 --> 00:24:31,359
Speaker 2: Got to be a cooller which was was drawn as

475
00:24:31,400 --> 00:24:33,960
Speaker 2: a white beer cooler, which had been drawn by the kids.

476
00:24:34,160 --> 00:24:37,320
Speaker 2: Got one from Mali, one from Lola Marley's was Okah,

477
00:24:37,560 --> 00:24:38,240
Speaker 2: it was terrible.

478
00:24:38,720 --> 00:24:41,800
Speaker 1: It was no good. It was it was you're like

479
00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:44,040
Speaker 1: judging it. So who's the winner is really? Give you

480
00:24:44,080 --> 00:24:46,040
Speaker 1: kids the complex the.

481
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:48,040
Speaker 2: One that Loa gave me, still on the floor of

482
00:24:48,080 --> 00:24:50,760
Speaker 2: the car. She doesn't know what she can't even remember

483
00:24:51,200 --> 00:24:52,119
Speaker 2: what happened this morning.

484
00:24:52,520 --> 00:24:54,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'll get it. I'll put it in them. But

485
00:24:54,119 --> 00:24:57,280
Speaker 1: that's not bad. That's not bad. Some shitty artwork, No,

486
00:24:57,600 --> 00:25:02,359
Speaker 1: just the Wow, look how much shitty artworker's up there?

487
00:25:02,640 --> 00:25:05,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's oscar get really pumped and you pick him

488
00:25:05,400 --> 00:25:07,159
Speaker 2: up and he's like, oh, comes home and he goes, Daddy,

489
00:25:07,240 --> 00:25:08,240
Speaker 2: look look I made.

490
00:25:08,119 --> 00:25:10,760
Speaker 1: There's another stack up there. There's another stack in the

491
00:25:10,800 --> 00:25:14,880
Speaker 1: family filing cabinet. Look at it. It's too much you're

492
00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:17,119
Speaker 1: gonna throw it out, You're gonna frame it, wait for

493
00:25:17,160 --> 00:25:22,160
Speaker 1: next winter and use it. There's kindly, But this year, look,

494
00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:24,879
Speaker 1: and I feel like every week I'm having a swap

495
00:25:24,920 --> 00:25:27,480
Speaker 1: at kindy And I'm sorry, this isn't a swap you

496
00:25:27,520 --> 00:25:31,640
Speaker 1: because I appreciate the effort. Okay, that to go. We'll

497
00:25:31,720 --> 00:25:34,520
Speaker 1: send Oscar home and Macy home with something to that.

498
00:25:34,640 --> 00:25:38,600
Speaker 1: Appreciate the effort. So don't get me wrong, but there's

499
00:25:38,680 --> 00:25:42,240
Speaker 1: no way I want a fucking jar AsSalt. And that's

500
00:25:42,240 --> 00:25:46,240
Speaker 1: what I got this year. Okay, It's just it's a

501
00:25:46,359 --> 00:25:49,960
Speaker 1: tiny jub I was like, I have it, yeah it, yeah, please?

502
00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:54,600
Speaker 1: Who's coming up with these ideas? I don't hate it.

503
00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:58,760
Speaker 1: I don't hate it. What's like the grass clippings in it?

504
00:25:58,800 --> 00:26:02,520
Speaker 1: Like rosemary ideas? But why did they think that I

505
00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:06,760
Speaker 1: wouldn't need salt? It's rosemary. It's rosemary infused salt what

506
00:26:06,800 --> 00:26:09,600
Speaker 1: every father needs. Yeah, but that's like what who just

507
00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:13,119
Speaker 1: so who signed off on that? Give me a beer caller.

508
00:26:13,720 --> 00:26:15,879
Speaker 1: That's a lot of salt. It is a lot of salt.

509
00:26:15,880 --> 00:26:21,879
Speaker 1: But like what like what like I just don't just

510
00:26:21,880 --> 00:26:27,400
Speaker 1: don't get it, Matthew, Like I'm puffed from end upstairs

511
00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:30,320
Speaker 1: to make you do that. But like, look, if you're listening,

512
00:26:30,440 --> 00:26:32,879
Speaker 1: it's just gone past Father's Day, so of course, Happy

513
00:26:32,920 --> 00:26:35,600
Speaker 1: Father's Day to everyone. Well this is going to come out.

514
00:26:35,680 --> 00:26:37,760
Speaker 1: Well wait, we didn't even wish anyone. No, we didn't.

515
00:26:37,800 --> 00:26:39,360
Speaker 1: I didn't. That's why I did it on the story.

516
00:26:39,720 --> 00:26:42,320
Speaker 1: But just tell us what you got that was shared. Look,

517
00:26:42,440 --> 00:26:44,879
Speaker 1: it's a unique gift. It's weird that they didn't.

518
00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:47,520
Speaker 2: And for anyone who's wondering what the salt looks like,

519
00:26:47,560 --> 00:26:50,160
Speaker 2: we will put a photo of this slash video on

520
00:26:50,160 --> 00:26:52,679
Speaker 2: our socials at two doting dads. But it's weird that

521
00:26:52,760 --> 00:26:55,600
Speaker 2: it's not in any way painted by Oscar.

522
00:26:55,760 --> 00:26:57,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, I thought, yeah, do you know what you paint that?

523
00:26:57,960 --> 00:27:02,200
Speaker 1: And I'm like, that's cool. Here we go. God ashes

524
00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:03,680
Speaker 1: off the table. He's now.

525
00:27:06,359 --> 00:27:09,040
Speaker 2: He's getting something else. Not sure what it's going to be.

526
00:27:09,119 --> 00:27:15,200
Speaker 1: Oh, he's good. This is last year. That's good gear.

527
00:27:15,359 --> 00:27:19,040
Speaker 1: That's that's that's what I'm expecting. What's underneath it? Yeah,

528
00:27:19,119 --> 00:27:19,640
Speaker 1: last year?

529
00:27:20,280 --> 00:27:23,159
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's that's Oscar's hand a wooden box. And

530
00:27:23,200 --> 00:27:25,840
Speaker 2: again we'll put this on socials, a wooden box handprint.

531
00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:27,040
Speaker 1: Happy Father's Day.

532
00:27:27,040 --> 00:27:31,040
Speaker 2: Sticker and it says fun dad, strong dad, kind dad.

533
00:27:31,200 --> 00:27:31,840
Speaker 1: That's not true.

534
00:27:32,160 --> 00:27:35,160
Speaker 2: Why is dad sweet dad?

535
00:27:35,520 --> 00:27:43,480
Speaker 1: Best dad? True? My dad? My dad? See that quality

536
00:27:44,240 --> 00:27:50,160
Speaker 1: very different. Hey, I'm disgruntled. I understand. I was like,

537
00:27:50,200 --> 00:27:53,240
Speaker 1: it's confusing, like here you go, is there anything else?

538
00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:55,600
Speaker 1: Do you reckon? Do you reckon? Oscar's just broken into

539
00:27:55,640 --> 00:28:00,280
Speaker 1: the kitchen and just yeah, yeah, the food down at

540
00:28:00,320 --> 00:28:06,200
Speaker 1: Kinny's really blanding now but yeah, look, actually I forgot

541
00:28:06,200 --> 00:28:09,720
Speaker 1: about that and just till now. But again in the cupboard, no,

542
00:28:09,760 --> 00:28:12,640
Speaker 1: I can see it. But the artwork, there's too much.

543
00:28:12,800 --> 00:28:13,440
Speaker 1: I understand.

544
00:28:13,520 --> 00:28:18,200
Speaker 2: Also also love love people who work at daycare, all educators,

545
00:28:18,240 --> 00:28:20,200
Speaker 2: you guys, unsung heroes of this.

546
00:28:20,359 --> 00:28:22,800
Speaker 1: I already told them to get over themselves earlier on. Yeah.

547
00:28:23,080 --> 00:28:25,240
Speaker 1: I don't think I can backflip on that, but that's

548
00:28:25,240 --> 00:28:27,440
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. I am not having a dig at them,

549
00:28:28,000 --> 00:28:31,840
Speaker 1: because it's the thought that counts. But just think about

550
00:28:31,880 --> 00:28:32,760
Speaker 1: what you're sending home.

551
00:28:32,920 --> 00:28:36,480
Speaker 2: There was every month there's like a new little fundraiser

552
00:28:36,720 --> 00:28:41,760
Speaker 2: at our daycare, you know, sometimes really great organizations. It

553
00:28:41,840 --> 00:28:45,120
Speaker 2: changes each time, and they're raising money.

554
00:28:45,120 --> 00:28:47,240
Speaker 1: I'm not sure who's for only fans.

555
00:28:50,560 --> 00:28:54,400
Speaker 2: I'm sure it's a very deserving organization. And the mechanic

556
00:28:55,000 --> 00:28:59,200
Speaker 2: was I think it was a donation for art that

557
00:28:59,320 --> 00:29:02,400
Speaker 2: has been created by like there's three different groups at decade.

558
00:29:02,400 --> 00:29:05,080
Speaker 2: There's like the infants, there's like the toddlers, so maybe

559
00:29:05,080 --> 00:29:08,480
Speaker 2: like one to two ish, and then there's like two three,

560
00:29:08,880 --> 00:29:10,880
Speaker 2: two to four. And it was done by those who

561
00:29:10,880 --> 00:29:12,000
Speaker 2: at age one to two.

562
00:29:12,040 --> 00:29:12,840
Speaker 1: So it was like a.

563
00:29:12,720 --> 00:29:17,160
Speaker 2: Stack of artwork that donated that you could donate a

564
00:29:17,160 --> 00:29:18,800
Speaker 2: bit of money for and you get you get to

565
00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:19,680
Speaker 2: choose your artwork.

566
00:29:19,720 --> 00:29:21,600
Speaker 1: But it was just it was just it was so

567
00:29:21,720 --> 00:29:24,840
Speaker 1: first of all, you're already sending home shitty artwork and

568
00:29:24,880 --> 00:29:27,280
Speaker 1: now they're asking you to pay for more shitty artwork

569
00:29:27,400 --> 00:29:29,800
Speaker 1: as a donation. And I'll tell you what, I'll give

570
00:29:29,840 --> 00:29:31,960
Speaker 1: you the money. I don't want the shitty artwork because

571
00:29:32,000 --> 00:29:35,400
Speaker 1: I could just about start my own artwork. I've got

572
00:29:35,480 --> 00:29:38,680
Speaker 1: up there. And the rule is if any of that

573
00:29:38,720 --> 00:29:41,280
Speaker 1: comes down, it goes straight to the bin. So if

574
00:29:41,320 --> 00:29:44,560
Speaker 1: I pull that cupboard sometimes you know those coin machines,

575
00:29:44,600 --> 00:29:46,160
Speaker 1: you put a coin and it pushes them to the

576
00:29:46,240 --> 00:29:49,320
Speaker 1: edge and sometimes they fall out. If anything falls out

577
00:29:49,320 --> 00:29:51,600
Speaker 1: of there, on one of the opens straight to the bin.

578
00:29:52,040 --> 00:29:55,440
Speaker 2: I'm not opposed to throwing out artwork. Laura has a

579
00:29:55,520 --> 00:29:56,600
Speaker 2: draw anything.

580
00:29:56,680 --> 00:30:01,120
Speaker 1: Marley draws. She's very good. Marley is good. She's very good.

581
00:30:01,200 --> 00:30:03,760
Speaker 2: And Laura keeps it all but like there's not like

582
00:30:03,880 --> 00:30:05,560
Speaker 2: what are we going to do with it? You know,

583
00:30:05,920 --> 00:30:07,840
Speaker 2: we reached a limit now.

584
00:30:08,440 --> 00:30:11,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, I also got a picture. I'd like this because

585
00:30:11,360 --> 00:30:14,040
Speaker 1: it's a good laugh and it's like a picture and

586
00:30:14,080 --> 00:30:15,760
Speaker 1: that it has what they love about their dad, but

587
00:30:15,800 --> 00:30:18,160
Speaker 1: it's written not in their handwriting, because he can barely

588
00:30:18,200 --> 00:30:20,760
Speaker 1: fucking write. The teachers said, you know, what do you

589
00:30:20,840 --> 00:30:23,040
Speaker 1: like about your daddy? Mine was like, I'm just gonna

590
00:30:23,040 --> 00:30:28,080
Speaker 1: get it because back up again, Yeah you are okay.

591
00:30:28,120 --> 00:30:30,640
Speaker 1: As I was saying, they send home these and it's

592
00:30:30,640 --> 00:30:33,640
Speaker 1: got my dad, and then I love my dad because

593
00:30:33,680 --> 00:30:35,600
Speaker 1: and then they write the rest of it because if

594
00:30:35,600 --> 00:30:38,200
Speaker 1: I was his handwriting is that neat? Can I read it?

595
00:30:38,480 --> 00:30:40,080
Speaker 1: Read it? So? Great?

596
00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:43,600
Speaker 2: Picture of you blue nose and you've got a purple mouth,

597
00:30:43,800 --> 00:30:46,480
Speaker 2: which is weird. I love my dad because he helps

598
00:30:46,520 --> 00:30:48,920
Speaker 2: me with boxes and toys and making things.

599
00:30:49,200 --> 00:30:51,720
Speaker 1: That's beautiful. Yeah, that's really nice. I like that, But

600
00:30:52,040 --> 00:30:55,160
Speaker 1: you know they're always so random. April's one was the

601
00:30:55,160 --> 00:30:56,760
Speaker 1: best for Mother's Day a couple of years ago. It

602
00:30:56,800 --> 00:30:59,400
Speaker 1: was like, I love my mummy because she makes the

603
00:30:59,480 --> 00:31:10,280
Speaker 1: drinks alcoholic. I was like, until people anyway, Ship presents.

604
00:31:09,920 --> 00:31:12,240
Speaker 2: Ash before we do the segment one of your favorites,

605
00:31:12,280 --> 00:31:15,760
Speaker 2: Budgie Smugglers Most Ordinary Parent. Do you want to give

606
00:31:15,840 --> 00:31:18,760
Speaker 2: us a little update of mister Freeze aka the Samurai

607
00:31:18,760 --> 00:31:19,800
Speaker 2: Wilding meth Head.

608
00:31:19,840 --> 00:31:23,120
Speaker 1: The Samurai meth Head. Yeah. Look, there's been some more

609
00:31:23,440 --> 00:31:27,520
Speaker 1: kerfuffles in the area. So if you heard the last

610
00:31:27,520 --> 00:31:29,600
Speaker 1: episode he was wielding a samurai saw it in the

611
00:31:29,680 --> 00:31:33,160
Speaker 1: kids park on a Sunday, which is prime time kids

612
00:31:33,160 --> 00:31:36,120
Speaker 1: park time. And then I went over to the cafe

613
00:31:36,200 --> 00:31:38,080
Speaker 1: yesterday and there was like three or four cop cars

614
00:31:38,080 --> 00:31:42,720
Speaker 1: in the car park. Again what now? And I walked

615
00:31:42,720 --> 00:31:46,120
Speaker 1: into the cafe and Peak goes, mister Freeze's at it again.

616
00:31:46,480 --> 00:31:48,640
Speaker 1: Why do they call him? Mister Freeze? Is a nice said,

617
00:31:48,720 --> 00:31:52,520
Speaker 1: I think to be creative. So it's not has nothing

618
00:31:52,520 --> 00:31:56,160
Speaker 1: to do with Batman. You guys have given him that name,

619
00:31:56,800 --> 00:32:01,040
Speaker 1: it's not. Yeah, he doesn't introduce himself as mister Freeze. Yeah. Yeah.

620
00:32:01,280 --> 00:32:03,120
Speaker 1: First of all, I was like, this is a nickname

621
00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:06,320
Speaker 1: that Pete's given him, and then I put the video

622
00:32:06,520 --> 00:32:09,320
Speaker 1: on our socials of me telling that story last week,

623
00:32:09,440 --> 00:32:12,960
Speaker 1: and two or three people have messaged me saying, oh, classic,

624
00:32:13,040 --> 00:32:17,880
Speaker 1: mister Freeze. So he's known in the area now as

625
00:32:18,040 --> 00:32:21,120
Speaker 1: mister Freeze and he will not go by any other

626
00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:24,560
Speaker 1: name other than that. And he's still and if he's listening,

627
00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:28,400
Speaker 1: the samurai saw was taken off him and he somehow

628
00:32:28,520 --> 00:32:32,480
Speaker 1: produced a new samurai. I don't know, but if you

629
00:32:32,520 --> 00:32:36,600
Speaker 1: go into his Facebook, it's really bad because he lives

630
00:32:36,600 --> 00:32:39,560
Speaker 1: close and he'll probably come after me. Sorry. Kids. A

631
00:32:39,560 --> 00:32:43,640
Speaker 1: photo his profile picture is a photo of a samurai saw. Yeah,

632
00:32:43,680 --> 00:32:47,280
Speaker 1: but which one. We're not sure it's actually it's actually

633
00:32:47,640 --> 00:32:50,080
Speaker 1: a clip out of a samurai with like a Japanese

634
00:32:50,160 --> 00:32:52,640
Speaker 1: dragon behind it. It's safe to say the guy's into

635
00:32:52,640 --> 00:33:00,040
Speaker 1: samurai saw. Anyway, We love you, mister Freeze. When you

636
00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:02,840
Speaker 1: come out on Parole. We cannot wait to have you

637
00:33:02,880 --> 00:33:06,600
Speaker 1: on the podcast back. Well, apparently he held his parents hostage. Okay,

638
00:33:06,640 --> 00:33:08,160
Speaker 1: I wonder if he's got any kids. Been nice to

639
00:33:08,160 --> 00:33:11,280
Speaker 1: have him on. Well, Pete was saying that he was

640
00:33:11,600 --> 00:33:13,640
Speaker 1: he was out in the front of his house with

641
00:33:13,720 --> 00:33:17,320
Speaker 1: a fishing rod, casting the fishing rod into the car. Park. Okay,

642
00:33:17,720 --> 00:33:19,600
Speaker 1: like he was fishing, what are you catch trying to catch?

643
00:33:19,640 --> 00:33:21,800
Speaker 1: What are you trying to catch? Mate? Thank you for

644
00:33:21,840 --> 00:33:23,480
Speaker 1: the update. It's going to the new segment.

645
00:33:23,520 --> 00:33:26,440
Speaker 2: Let's should we have this like a running a running segment.

646
00:33:27,880 --> 00:33:31,200
Speaker 1: Freeze should get his home address and knock on his door.

647
00:33:31,240 --> 00:33:34,680
Speaker 1: I know roughly which one is. But look, I'm very

648
00:33:34,720 --> 00:33:37,280
Speaker 1: mindful that if he has any idea of who you are,

649
00:33:37,400 --> 00:33:40,200
Speaker 1: you'll follow me. I will never do another record here again.

650
00:33:42,160 --> 00:33:44,920
Speaker 1: Let's do this segment, Budgie Smoker's most Ordinary parent. I

651
00:33:44,920 --> 00:33:49,040
Speaker 1: thought you'd never ask. Let's do it. We just argent

652
00:33:49,600 --> 00:33:55,880
Speaker 1: repair ordinary repair. We don't know what we do. We

653
00:33:55,960 --> 00:34:06,120
Speaker 1: don't know what we're doing because repair. Those of you

654
00:34:06,160 --> 00:34:07,840
Speaker 1: who don't know what this segment is. It's brought to

655
00:34:07,840 --> 00:34:11,640
Speaker 1: you by Budget Smugglud of course, and I fighted. That's okay,

656
00:34:11,640 --> 00:34:16,480
Speaker 1: I farted across the six again. Play on. You have

657
00:34:16,480 --> 00:34:19,160
Speaker 1: the opportunity, not you, Matthew. The listeners have the opportunity

658
00:34:19,200 --> 00:34:22,480
Speaker 1: to win two hundred dollars worth of Budget Smugglers product,

659
00:34:22,480 --> 00:34:24,640
Speaker 1: which is great. Every time we rung this segment, and

660
00:34:24,680 --> 00:34:27,399
Speaker 1: the segment is based around the ordinary parenting you do.

661
00:34:27,480 --> 00:34:31,040
Speaker 1: And example is The winner last week was someone who

662
00:34:31,120 --> 00:34:34,840
Speaker 1: secretly breaks their kids toys so that she has an

663
00:34:34,880 --> 00:34:36,080
Speaker 1: excuse to throw them out.

664
00:34:36,160 --> 00:34:39,759
Speaker 2: I was thinking about last week. I do think that

665
00:34:39,920 --> 00:34:41,960
Speaker 2: and deserving.

666
00:34:41,480 --> 00:34:43,600
Speaker 1: Of the award the gift for trying to take it

667
00:34:43,640 --> 00:34:43,960
Speaker 1: back off.

668
00:34:44,239 --> 00:34:46,280
Speaker 2: No, I would never take it back off her because

669
00:34:46,280 --> 00:34:49,279
Speaker 2: we've given it out and I'm glad that she got it.

670
00:34:49,320 --> 00:34:52,120
Speaker 2: But I did think, don't you reckon? It's better off

671
00:34:52,280 --> 00:34:54,799
Speaker 2: just to like, when the kids are away, you can

672
00:34:54,840 --> 00:34:56,600
Speaker 2: just throw things out without them realizing.

673
00:34:57,040 --> 00:34:59,359
Speaker 1: I see it. You can also instead of throwing them out,

674
00:34:59,360 --> 00:35:02,759
Speaker 1: maybe donate them. Okay, but that's different. I think the

675
00:35:02,920 --> 00:35:06,640
Speaker 1: reason for the breaking them secretly and then pretending to

676
00:35:06,680 --> 00:35:08,480
Speaker 1: break them when the kids are there so they know

677
00:35:08,560 --> 00:35:12,320
Speaker 1: what happened to them. So there's sometimes when i've for example,

678
00:35:12,400 --> 00:35:13,680
Speaker 1: the other night, I woke up in the middle of

679
00:35:13,719 --> 00:35:16,279
Speaker 1: nights who get Oscar? Because he pissed the bed and

680
00:35:16,320 --> 00:35:19,520
Speaker 1: I stepped on his favorite monster truck snapped the wheel

681
00:35:19,520 --> 00:35:23,480
Speaker 1: off of hidden it. He doesn't know yet somehow I'm

682
00:35:23,480 --> 00:35:27,000
Speaker 1: going to make so it looks like he broke it anyway.

683
00:35:27,719 --> 00:35:30,200
Speaker 1: That's what this segment's all about. But if I just

684
00:35:30,320 --> 00:35:32,480
Speaker 1: threw that out, for example, and he was like, where's

685
00:35:32,480 --> 00:35:34,960
Speaker 1: my grave digger monster truck. Then I'll be like, oh,

686
00:35:35,040 --> 00:35:36,839
Speaker 1: throw it out. That's way worse when you go, oh,

687
00:35:36,960 --> 00:35:40,920
Speaker 1: mommy accidentally broke it, silly clumsy mummy. Ha. We'll have

688
00:35:41,000 --> 00:35:43,040
Speaker 1: to throw it out because it's not fixable. So that's

689
00:35:43,040 --> 00:35:48,520
Speaker 1: what your points nullum voice. Sorry, apologies. Okay, So this week,

690
00:35:49,120 --> 00:35:51,160
Speaker 1: let's go. We'll do the same thing. We'll read out

691
00:35:51,160 --> 00:35:53,880
Speaker 1: one age and then we'll read out the winter. And

692
00:35:53,920 --> 00:35:57,600
Speaker 1: I've got an absolute cracker for the winner. I reckon

693
00:35:57,920 --> 00:36:01,440
Speaker 1: he's been warning. No Jesus a tag on them. They

694
00:36:01,520 --> 00:36:02,360
Speaker 1: smell tangy.

695
00:36:02,680 --> 00:36:05,000
Speaker 2: We've got Budgies over the mics and these are the

696
00:36:05,000 --> 00:36:10,759
Speaker 2: customs limited edition Jam Pikelerts Pink Budgy smugglers. We will

697
00:36:10,760 --> 00:36:11,839
Speaker 2: at some point give some out.

698
00:36:12,239 --> 00:36:14,600
Speaker 1: We will. Yes, I've got some on the way. They're

699
00:36:14,640 --> 00:36:17,960
Speaker 1: fucking great. A they're brand new. No, they're bananas. I

700
00:36:18,040 --> 00:36:20,480
Speaker 1: love it. Yeah, I've got I've got them all man. Okay,

701
00:36:20,480 --> 00:36:23,280
Speaker 1: so I've got a great one here. Great in terms

702
00:36:23,320 --> 00:36:29,160
Speaker 1: of this is fucking average. This is very average. I

703
00:36:29,160 --> 00:36:31,840
Speaker 1: shouldn't laugh. You shouldn't be I shouldn't laugh, but I

704
00:36:31,840 --> 00:36:36,080
Speaker 1: will from Meg another Meg Meg won at last week

705
00:36:36,239 --> 00:36:39,080
Speaker 1: is the same. I don't ever last name. Maybe Meg's

706
00:36:39,160 --> 00:36:43,120
Speaker 1: just like Meg's just an ordinary preparent. He loves Budgie,

707
00:36:44,320 --> 00:36:46,720
Speaker 1: she says, hungover question Mark.

708
00:36:47,239 --> 00:36:51,120
Speaker 2: Sometimes we are. She has a great solution, throw a

709
00:36:51,280 --> 00:36:55,280
Speaker 2: handful of sultanas all across the floor and head straight

710
00:36:55,320 --> 00:36:59,600
Speaker 2: back to bed. These kids occupied for hours an hour?

711
00:37:01,120 --> 00:37:02,160
Speaker 2: How many is she throwing?

712
00:37:02,920 --> 00:37:04,600
Speaker 1: She's just like one of those Kilo bags.

713
00:37:05,600 --> 00:37:07,800
Speaker 2: It's like when you're a farmer and you're feeding pigs

714
00:37:07,840 --> 00:37:09,960
Speaker 2: and you're just throwing feet off the floor.

715
00:37:09,760 --> 00:37:12,920
Speaker 1: Trying to keep me entertained. I know a look, I

716
00:37:12,960 --> 00:37:15,520
Speaker 1: know what you mean. Like that, my kids love sultanas.

717
00:37:15,680 --> 00:37:18,239
Speaker 1: Might have grown out of the sultana phase. Do you

718
00:37:18,280 --> 00:37:20,080
Speaker 1: know what would really get him? If I threw like

719
00:37:20,120 --> 00:37:22,799
Speaker 1: a bunch of Eminem's, Oh, that would be it. I'd

720
00:37:22,800 --> 00:37:26,400
Speaker 1: get it. It's to sleep all day, just really really quickly.

721
00:37:26,960 --> 00:37:30,000
Speaker 2: We have a packet of Eminem's and it sits next

722
00:37:30,000 --> 00:37:32,200
Speaker 2: to the wheat picks. And this morning I got the

723
00:37:32,239 --> 00:37:35,080
Speaker 2: wheat picks out and the Eminem's packet fell on the ground.

724
00:37:35,800 --> 00:37:38,280
Speaker 2: I like a few Eminem's like bounced.

725
00:37:37,880 --> 00:37:41,280
Speaker 1: andCA It's like it was like little rodents.

726
00:37:42,280 --> 00:37:44,879
Speaker 2: Yeah, like, honestly, before I had a chance, Lola was like,

727
00:37:45,239 --> 00:37:49,000
Speaker 2: looking at she's already an I give it back, like

728
00:37:49,040 --> 00:37:49,719
Speaker 2: wrestling with that.

729
00:37:50,120 --> 00:37:55,680
Speaker 1: She's like, that's great. So the next one, this is

730
00:37:55,719 --> 00:37:57,799
Speaker 1: also not the winner. This is just another one which

731
00:37:57,840 --> 00:38:00,279
Speaker 1: we thought was really good as well. Actually I really

732
00:38:00,280 --> 00:38:03,960
Speaker 1: do like this one. So Marie, she doubles the bedding

733
00:38:04,200 --> 00:38:06,759
Speaker 1: for any incidents during the night. So Matthew, what she

734
00:38:06,800 --> 00:38:11,440
Speaker 1: would do is go waterproof sheet, then fitted sheet, waterproof

735
00:38:11,520 --> 00:38:15,840
Speaker 1: sheet and then fitted sheet. It's kind of like the

736
00:38:15,880 --> 00:38:20,399
Speaker 1: pasta past. So what she does is like the other

737
00:38:20,480 --> 00:38:21,800
Speaker 1: night when I got up and Oscar piss of the

738
00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:23,040
Speaker 1: bed and you had to sleep in our room because

739
00:38:23,040 --> 00:38:24,320
Speaker 1: it was like, oh, I'm going to get the sheets

740
00:38:24,320 --> 00:38:26,200
Speaker 1: off and change it. Fuck that at three o'clock in

741
00:38:26,239 --> 00:38:28,080
Speaker 1: the morning. It was just getting a bed with us.

742
00:38:28,320 --> 00:38:31,960
Speaker 1: This just ripped the top two layers off. That is

743
00:38:32,120 --> 00:38:34,200
Speaker 1: genius and straight back into bed.

744
00:38:34,480 --> 00:38:37,960
Speaker 2: At the moment, Lola is obsessed with warm water. She's

745
00:38:38,000 --> 00:38:39,880
Speaker 2: not having the milk, and she's waking.

746
00:38:39,680 --> 00:38:41,719
Speaker 1: Up in the middle of the night. She's just obsessed with.

747
00:38:42,719 --> 00:38:45,360
Speaker 2: She's so all or nothing at the moment, dummies and

748
00:38:45,440 --> 00:38:48,600
Speaker 2: warm water. And then she'll have two or three bottles

749
00:38:48,640 --> 00:38:50,040
Speaker 2: of warm water and we try and give her like

750
00:38:50,040 --> 00:38:52,720
Speaker 2: a little bit and she just pisss right through the nappy.

751
00:38:52,960 --> 00:38:55,560
Speaker 1: Oh my god, just like like all nine yeah, and

752
00:38:55,239 --> 00:38:56,960
Speaker 1: then we have to bring her into bed and it's

753
00:38:57,040 --> 00:39:02,640
Speaker 1: just that is genius. That's great from her. Name's Marie Morale. Oh,

754
00:39:02,920 --> 00:39:05,960
Speaker 1: we've got the winner. We have the winner, please, Matthew.

755
00:39:06,160 --> 00:39:09,680
Speaker 1: This week's winner comes from someone by the name of Caitlin. Great.

756
00:39:09,719 --> 00:39:12,000
Speaker 1: This one's come on our email. So she's emailed us,

757
00:39:12,360 --> 00:39:15,040
Speaker 1: which is in the bio of two Doting Dads. It

758
00:39:15,120 --> 00:39:19,319
Speaker 1: is two D D two double D at a look

759
00:39:19,480 --> 00:39:22,839
Speaker 1: dot com correct or you can dms, but email it's

760
00:39:22,840 --> 00:39:25,360
Speaker 1: good too. So it comes from Kaitlyn. And Kaitlyn says,

761
00:39:25,440 --> 00:39:28,320
Speaker 1: our eighteen month old likes to empty out the contents

762
00:39:28,360 --> 00:39:31,239
Speaker 1: of our top bedside draw. What have we got there?

763
00:39:32,200 --> 00:39:34,160
Speaker 1: Her favorite thing to play with is a pair of

764
00:39:34,239 --> 00:39:41,200
Speaker 1: sex dies, amongst some other adult things. She's at a

765
00:39:41,719 --> 00:39:44,040
Speaker 1: she's at the age where it's often just easier to

766
00:39:44,120 --> 00:39:46,840
Speaker 1: let her play with them rather than deal with the tens,

767
00:39:46,880 --> 00:39:50,400
Speaker 1: and so I just let her go. And then she

768
00:39:50,480 --> 00:39:52,960
Speaker 1: goes on to say and says, it was pretty awkward,

769
00:39:53,040 --> 00:39:55,200
Speaker 1: Mum and dad came over and she was playing with sex,

770
00:39:55,239 --> 00:40:02,239
Speaker 1: diyes and lube in the loud. So that is our

771
00:40:02,280 --> 00:40:06,480
Speaker 1: winner for this week. Caitlyn gradually happy, play on. I

772
00:40:06,560 --> 00:40:09,640
Speaker 1: love this segment weekend. It's an absolute crack Like. I

773
00:40:09,800 --> 00:40:12,239
Speaker 1: get a few emails and they're all pretty good.

774
00:40:12,600 --> 00:40:14,800
Speaker 2: Great, great, So Caitlin, we will be in touch. We

775
00:40:14,840 --> 00:40:16,960
Speaker 2: will send you your voucher two hundred bucks worth of

776
00:40:17,040 --> 00:40:18,160
Speaker 2: budget smuggler gear.

777
00:40:18,480 --> 00:40:21,960
Speaker 1: Congratulations. Yes. To finish off today, we're going to just

778
00:40:22,000 --> 00:40:24,640
Speaker 1: do a couple of questions. So every week we answer

779
00:40:24,719 --> 00:40:28,719
Speaker 1: the questions of this great nation. They rely on us

780
00:40:28,800 --> 00:40:34,319
Speaker 1: heavily to answer these questions. But also don't take any

781
00:40:34,360 --> 00:40:35,239
Speaker 1: advice that we give you.

782
00:40:35,480 --> 00:40:38,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, if you have a question, please send it through. Yes,

783
00:40:38,760 --> 00:40:40,880
Speaker 2: we would love to hear from the parents of this country.

784
00:40:41,120 --> 00:40:42,680
Speaker 2: It gives me great pride.

785
00:40:42,360 --> 00:40:44,839
Speaker 1: Of any country. But don't just pigeonhole us. No. Yeah,

786
00:40:44,840 --> 00:40:48,359
Speaker 1: I'll take anything, any country from around the world. I'll

787
00:40:48,480 --> 00:40:52,319
Speaker 1: take it. I would you like to go first? Oh? Yeah, okay, sure,

788
00:40:52,480 --> 00:40:57,080
Speaker 1: why not? I'll go first? All right? Matthew. What do

789
00:40:57,200 --> 00:41:00,720
Speaker 1: you enjoy doing for your wife that you know helps

790
00:41:00,760 --> 00:41:06,560
Speaker 1: them out? Absolutely nothing too. There's a few things that

791
00:41:06,719 --> 00:41:11,240
Speaker 1: I do you are a very doting dad, guilty guilty

792
00:41:11,280 --> 00:41:13,719
Speaker 1: loving husband has charged? Well, that's what I'll say at

793
00:41:13,760 --> 00:41:15,920
Speaker 1: your funeral, will be like he was a very doting

794
00:41:16,080 --> 00:41:22,839
Speaker 1: dad loving husband. My now wife, Laura, allow anywhere near

795
00:41:23,320 --> 00:41:26,080
Speaker 1: my funeral. You miss completely miss my joke. You know

796
00:41:26,120 --> 00:41:29,400
Speaker 1: I heard it. I fucking heard it. Mine now wife

797
00:41:29,520 --> 00:41:35,919
Speaker 1: and step children. I have my sister wives, able and Laura.

798
00:41:37,960 --> 00:41:43,000
Speaker 1: Laura is a big fan. She is at her absolute

799
00:41:43,160 --> 00:41:49,040
Speaker 1: happiest slash horniest when the house is clean.

800
00:41:49,160 --> 00:41:52,120
Speaker 2: If the house is dirty, which it often is with

801
00:41:52,239 --> 00:41:56,040
Speaker 2: two kids, it's very unlikely that she would be in

802
00:41:56,120 --> 00:42:00,600
Speaker 2: the mood. But actually, like we have a fortnight. We

803
00:42:00,680 --> 00:42:02,719
Speaker 2: have a cleaner come through on a Thursday and gives

804
00:42:02,800 --> 00:42:03,520
Speaker 2: us a little.

805
00:42:03,280 --> 00:42:08,080
Speaker 1: Hand just having sex with the clean don't let me

806
00:42:08,120 --> 00:42:10,719
Speaker 1: out like that man, come on. Yeah, And like Laura

807
00:42:10,840 --> 00:42:12,839
Speaker 1: comes home, it's like fuck, yeah, I got to wash

808
00:42:12,880 --> 00:42:15,200
Speaker 1: that clean and whip around mouse that mop.

809
00:42:15,640 --> 00:42:18,880
Speaker 2: She loves it when it's spotless, and I will like

810
00:42:19,600 --> 00:42:22,399
Speaker 2: sometimes I'll like, you know, I'll just vacuum the floor,

811
00:42:22,480 --> 00:42:24,920
Speaker 2: I'll put the washing away because she comes home. And

812
00:42:25,040 --> 00:42:27,960
Speaker 2: it's more so like I'll only do the tasks that

813
00:42:28,160 --> 00:42:30,640
Speaker 2: have strong visual Yeah, yeah, yeah.

814
00:42:30,560 --> 00:42:32,719
Speaker 1: Yeah, like I won't do like it's like these they

815
00:42:32,760 --> 00:42:35,000
Speaker 1: put the good apples at the front. Similar thing. Yes,

816
00:42:35,160 --> 00:42:37,439
Speaker 1: you're like, okay, what does she see when she walks

817
00:42:37,520 --> 00:42:40,360
Speaker 1: in if there's no shoes and stuff on the entrance

818
00:42:40,440 --> 00:42:41,040
Speaker 1: to the how.

819
00:42:45,200 --> 00:42:47,080
Speaker 2: And then when she walks through and she sees at

820
00:42:47,080 --> 00:42:50,440
Speaker 2: the kitchen table, She's just that's just the dumping ground

821
00:42:50,560 --> 00:42:51,960
Speaker 2: of all the clearings.

822
00:42:52,040 --> 00:42:54,200
Speaker 1: And I'm like, you know, I just I'll hide that

823
00:42:54,480 --> 00:42:59,040
Speaker 1: in like closet somewhere with rubbish bags. She's like, all

824
00:42:59,080 --> 00:43:01,480
Speaker 1: she cares about is just she gets weaker than these.

825
00:43:01,600 --> 00:43:01,799
Speaker 2: Yeah.

826
00:43:02,040 --> 00:43:07,160
Speaker 1: Literally, she's like, man, and then the icing on the cake,

827
00:43:07,280 --> 00:43:10,120
Speaker 1: the cremedther crem is. I'm very guilty.

828
00:43:10,160 --> 00:43:12,719
Speaker 2: I take my clothes off and if it's worn but

829
00:43:12,880 --> 00:43:15,080
Speaker 2: not dirty enough to be put in the laundry.

830
00:43:14,800 --> 00:43:18,520
Speaker 1: But it's floor drope. Yes, yeah, and I'm so guilty

831
00:43:18,560 --> 00:43:21,120
Speaker 1: of it. I know you are, as he's every couple

832
00:43:21,400 --> 00:43:24,320
Speaker 1: and every man. Hence the video I have made on

833
00:43:24,480 --> 00:43:27,160
Speaker 1: that where it's kind of like you're gonna put this

834
00:43:27,239 --> 00:43:29,040
Speaker 1: in the washing. They're not dirty, he put them away.

835
00:43:29,040 --> 00:43:31,799
Speaker 1: They're clean. Well, they're not exactly clean. It's the halfway pile.

836
00:43:32,080 --> 00:43:34,080
Speaker 1: There needs to be a better invention for where that

837
00:43:34,120 --> 00:43:37,879
Speaker 1: stuff can be called a chair. That's the next thing.

838
00:43:38,480 --> 00:43:41,040
Speaker 1: I put my clothes away and Laura sees that the

839
00:43:41,160 --> 00:43:48,120
Speaker 1: bedroom is clean. Well, yeah, it's on business. Damn they

840
00:43:48,200 --> 00:43:50,640
Speaker 1: not keep her off me. Yeah, that's what I do.

841
00:43:50,760 --> 00:43:53,359
Speaker 1: What do you do? What do I do? Oh? Look?

842
00:43:54,520 --> 00:43:57,239
Speaker 1: Oh look do you know what I do? Or do nothing?

843
00:43:57,560 --> 00:43:59,680
Speaker 1: She don't care how drink she gets home, Like, what's

844
00:43:59,680 --> 00:44:05,279
Speaker 1: for dinner? Look? I cook? I cook every night. That's

845
00:44:05,320 --> 00:44:09,440
Speaker 1: my thing. Like last night I cooked and then I

846
00:44:09,760 --> 00:44:11,439
Speaker 1: did all the washing up and we were on the phone.

847
00:44:11,480 --> 00:44:15,120
Speaker 1: I just went into autopiloted. And if I'm just happy,

848
00:44:15,800 --> 00:44:19,520
Speaker 1: if she says thanks babe, and then she can go off,

849
00:44:19,920 --> 00:44:22,319
Speaker 1: have a shower, go and read and let me let

850
00:44:22,360 --> 00:44:27,360
Speaker 1: me be what I'm doing. Love it. That is just beautiful,

851
00:44:28,120 --> 00:44:33,640
Speaker 1: kind of sad. Okay, last question, what is the best

852
00:44:33,719 --> 00:44:39,160
Speaker 1: thing about having two kids? Very good question, because you'd

853
00:44:39,239 --> 00:44:41,600
Speaker 1: think that there's not a lot of good things other

854
00:44:41,719 --> 00:44:48,640
Speaker 1: than twice the love, I would say, And I had

855
00:44:48,680 --> 00:44:52,160
Speaker 1: a moment the other day where me, Macey and Osca

856
00:44:52,239 --> 00:44:54,960
Speaker 1: went to the park. Okay, and I had a moment

857
00:44:55,000 --> 00:44:57,680
Speaker 1: where Macy was in the swing, and swing's a great

858
00:44:57,680 --> 00:45:00,520
Speaker 1: one because you could just be like yeah, I but

859
00:45:01,520 --> 00:45:04,840
Speaker 1: Oscar started pushing Macy on the swing and I just

860
00:45:05,040 --> 00:45:08,239
Speaker 1: sat down and I was like, how fucking good is this?

861
00:45:09,200 --> 00:45:11,360
Speaker 1: This is why you have two so that the older

862
00:45:11,440 --> 00:45:14,360
Speaker 1: one can eventually take over your duties as the parent.

863
00:45:15,320 --> 00:45:17,480
Speaker 1: That is the best thing about having two kids.

864
00:45:17,600 --> 00:45:20,840
Speaker 2: And next week Oscar will be on the podcast, should

865
00:45:20,840 --> 00:45:21,920
Speaker 2: be on the couch drinking beer.

866
00:45:22,040 --> 00:45:27,080
Speaker 1: We'll be divorced. So how was your week, He'd be like,

867
00:45:27,200 --> 00:45:28,640
Speaker 1: I had a kidney on Wednesday.

868
00:45:30,400 --> 00:45:32,920
Speaker 2: When when the kids start playing with each other nicely,

869
00:45:33,560 --> 00:45:36,279
Speaker 2: it is a beautiful thing, and it doesn't last that

870
00:45:36,400 --> 00:45:40,360
Speaker 2: long because often anything that Lola touches, Lola is for

871
00:45:40,360 --> 00:45:43,320
Speaker 2: those who aren't familiar, Lola is two for me, Marley

872
00:45:43,440 --> 00:45:44,879
Speaker 2: is four lower touches anything.

873
00:45:44,960 --> 00:45:47,200
Speaker 1: She's two for you, she two for everybody else. I

874
00:45:47,280 --> 00:45:52,560
Speaker 1: can see how you can find that funny is fucking terrible.

875
00:45:53,719 --> 00:45:54,480
Speaker 1: Two for everyone.

876
00:45:55,239 --> 00:45:58,200
Speaker 2: But anything that Lola touches anything at all, Mary's like,

877
00:45:58,400 --> 00:46:00,279
Speaker 2: oh I fuck, it was just about to grab I

878
00:46:00,400 --> 00:46:03,400
Speaker 2: want it now, And so that often ends in an argument.

879
00:46:03,520 --> 00:46:05,920
Speaker 1: It's like that video I made of George Stanza, and

880
00:46:06,160 --> 00:46:09,799
Speaker 1: that literally as soon as I saw that, I was.

881
00:46:09,800 --> 00:46:12,799
Speaker 2: Like that is what it's like having to Lola will

882
00:46:12,840 --> 00:46:15,800
Speaker 2: touch the play dough and then Marley's like, I was

883
00:46:15,840 --> 00:46:19,000
Speaker 2: just about to play with that, and then I can

884
00:46:19,120 --> 00:46:21,040
Speaker 2: like coax it out of Lola give it to Marley

885
00:46:21,120 --> 00:46:23,440
Speaker 2: and Marley's having and then Lola will then grab like

886
00:46:23,520 --> 00:46:25,640
Speaker 2: the soccer ball and Then's like, well, that's my soccer

887
00:46:25,680 --> 00:46:26,160
Speaker 2: ball as well.

888
00:46:26,280 --> 00:46:29,360
Speaker 1: The worst is when they like I had it first

889
00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:32,200
Speaker 1: and it was like you have it three days ago.

890
00:46:34,280 --> 00:46:35,040
Speaker 1: It's a nightmare.

891
00:46:35,080 --> 00:46:38,279
Speaker 2: But then there are moments, very brief moments like you know,

892
00:46:38,360 --> 00:46:40,040
Speaker 2: we have a little doll house up in their room,

893
00:46:40,080 --> 00:46:42,000
Speaker 2: and then I can hear them playing and I can

894
00:46:42,080 --> 00:46:45,120
Speaker 2: like just like pop my head like just ever so

895
00:46:45,280 --> 00:46:46,919
Speaker 2: slightly in the doorway and I can see them playing,

896
00:46:46,960 --> 00:46:49,480
Speaker 2: and they're playing like moms and dads, and it's just

897
00:46:50,160 --> 00:46:54,400
Speaker 2: warm as my cold dead heart. When they're being a

898
00:46:54,480 --> 00:46:58,960
Speaker 2: happy like a year and a half between, they're pretty close. Yeah,

899
00:46:59,280 --> 00:47:01,160
Speaker 2: and like no that they may grow up to be

900
00:47:01,280 --> 00:47:01,840
Speaker 2: best friends.

901
00:47:01,920 --> 00:47:04,160
Speaker 1: Maybe all they might hate each other. I'm sure they will. Yeah,

902
00:47:04,239 --> 00:47:06,600
Speaker 1: I'm sure they will. It's beautiful and like Oscar is

903
00:47:06,680 --> 00:47:09,320
Speaker 1: like the same. But anyway, update on Oscar just before

904
00:47:09,360 --> 00:47:11,879
Speaker 1: we go, before we let the good people of all

905
00:47:12,000 --> 00:47:16,120
Speaker 1: the nations go update on Oscar. From the start of

906
00:47:16,200 --> 00:47:20,160
Speaker 1: this conversation, we have you started laughing. We have received

907
00:47:20,560 --> 00:47:24,960
Speaker 1: communication that Oscar needs to be picked up from KINDI okay,

908
00:47:25,480 --> 00:47:28,279
Speaker 1: so not only have I paid for the day, now

909
00:47:28,440 --> 00:47:30,279
Speaker 1: he's got to spend the day here, so I'll better

910
00:47:30,360 --> 00:47:33,520
Speaker 1: go on do that. Yes, and oh he made it

911
00:47:33,600 --> 00:47:36,879
Speaker 1: to one thirty. Yeah, that's pretty good, so look, thank

912
00:47:36,920 --> 00:47:39,680
Speaker 1: you again. Oh can I just say one thing? Yes, Ash,

913
00:47:40,080 --> 00:47:40,560
Speaker 1: you know this.

914
00:47:41,600 --> 00:47:44,640
Speaker 2: The good people of this podcast don't know this. On

915
00:47:44,760 --> 00:47:48,759
Speaker 2: the sixteenth of September, which is a Saturday, I'm going

916
00:47:48,840 --> 00:47:51,680
Speaker 2: to be taking on a new job as chief packing

917
00:47:51,760 --> 00:47:56,239
Speaker 2: Officer at ALDI, albeit at Brookvale Brooker Deval, which is

918
00:47:56,360 --> 00:47:57,200
Speaker 2: your neck of the words.

919
00:47:57,239 --> 00:48:00,800
Speaker 1: Ash. For two bucks, I will pack you at the

920
00:48:00,920 --> 00:48:04,839
Speaker 1: checkout because Matt really needs the money. Times are tough

921
00:48:04,880 --> 00:48:07,200
Speaker 1: for this podcast is not making us any money anymore.

922
00:48:07,840 --> 00:48:08,960
Speaker 1: So I'm now at Aldi.

923
00:48:09,239 --> 00:48:12,200
Speaker 2: All that money that's donated will then go to Camp

924
00:48:12,320 --> 00:48:13,839
Speaker 2: Quality for Kids with cancer.

925
00:48:13,880 --> 00:48:17,000
Speaker 1: Two bucks rip off. I think that's two bucks are back.

926
00:48:17,120 --> 00:48:20,120
Speaker 2: I was saying, yeah, or the whole lot per shopper,

927
00:48:20,280 --> 00:48:21,279
Speaker 2: per shopper two bucks.

928
00:48:21,640 --> 00:48:23,600
Speaker 1: It's like me and a bunch of shoppers get together

929
00:48:23,600 --> 00:48:27,680
Speaker 1: and be like, look, we can all chip in twenty cents. No,

930
00:48:27,800 --> 00:48:29,680
Speaker 1: it is for a good cause. Christ I'm going to

931
00:48:29,719 --> 00:48:32,080
Speaker 1: come down. That's a lie. I'm not going to come down.

932
00:48:32,160 --> 00:48:35,080
Speaker 1: You won't look if I'm going to come down. I

933
00:48:35,239 --> 00:48:37,520
Speaker 1: really wanted to come down to shame you, but I

934
00:48:37,680 --> 00:48:41,040
Speaker 1: feel because it's for charity, I can't do that. You

935
00:48:41,080 --> 00:48:42,799
Speaker 1: can shame me if you want. Okay, cool wi heckle

936
00:48:42,840 --> 00:48:44,160
Speaker 1: me hit the checkout. I was going to bring a

937
00:48:44,160 --> 00:48:48,480
Speaker 1: bunch of my mates down. Yeah. Nothing, Well, I don't

938
00:48:48,480 --> 00:48:50,040
Speaker 1: know if I should wear the short shorts or like

939
00:48:50,200 --> 00:48:54,279
Speaker 1: pants short shorts, Yeah, get the pins out. Laura doesn't

940
00:48:54,360 --> 00:48:58,600
Speaker 1: like him regress, talk about what she likes. I'm doing it.

941
00:48:58,800 --> 00:49:00,960
Speaker 1: I'm doing it for you a bit. The missus from

942
00:49:00,960 --> 00:49:04,120
Speaker 1: Bondey as well. Every there. He already text me, he said,

943
00:49:04,600 --> 00:49:06,120
Speaker 1: make sure you convince him to weather short.

944
00:49:08,120 --> 00:49:11,279
Speaker 2: So yeah, sixteen Saturday, Aldi brook Vale, all for good cause,

945
00:49:11,280 --> 00:49:13,480
Speaker 2: for cant quality and as you've got to go pick

946
00:49:13,560 --> 00:49:16,000
Speaker 2: up Oscar, we should.

947
00:49:15,760 --> 00:49:19,360
Speaker 1: Get out of here. If you enjoyed today's sorry, please

948
00:49:19,960 --> 00:49:23,399
Speaker 1: if you enjoyed today's episodes, please hit subscribe button. Send

949
00:49:23,400 --> 00:49:25,640
Speaker 1: it to someone that could use a per cup, A

950
00:49:25,840 --> 00:49:30,080
Speaker 1: parent or a non parent who cares. Jump onto Spotify,

951
00:49:30,400 --> 00:49:35,600
Speaker 1: Jump onto Apple, iHeartRadio. Leave a review five stars. Follow

952
00:49:35,680 --> 00:49:39,040
Speaker 1: us on our Instagram, what said and we love you.

953
00:49:42,960 --> 00:49:54,080
Speaker 1: Clearly I need to go so yeah two.

954
00:49:54,160 --> 00:49:57,920
Speaker 2: Doting Dad's podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout

955
00:49:58,000 --> 00:50:01,240
Speaker 2: Australia and the connections to land, see and community.

956
00:50:01,520 --> 00:50:04,000
Speaker 1: We pay our respects to their elders past and present

957
00:50:04,120 --> 00:50:07,200
Speaker 1: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestrate Islander

958
00:50:07,239 --> 00:50:10,839
Speaker 1: peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land