Speaker 1: An no mountain.
Speaker 2: Ha.
Speaker 1: Well that's very will feral.
Speaker 2: A valil.
Speaker 1: Or river wad and very rare.
Speaker 2: It that was very good. Yeah, that video that you
Speaker 2: just got, so I'm going to have to pull you up.
Speaker 2: You've just got a big old black thing in your teeth. Smile.
Speaker 1: That's right there.
Speaker 2: I keep going, come on, no nos, smile you're on camera.
Speaker 2: You want to be looking good?
Speaker 1: Holy ship?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 1: What was that? Come?
Speaker 2: Welcome back to two Dading Dads. I'm Maddie Jay and
Speaker 2: I'm Ash and this is a podcast all about parenting.
Speaker 2: It's the good, it is the bad, and why am I.
Speaker 1: Sweating the relatable? It's warm today. It's warm.
Speaker 2: If you come, if you've come, if you I just
Speaker 2: did any advice whatsoever, stop.
Speaker 1: Right now, Thank you very much.
Speaker 2: You're not going to get it here. It's very warm.
Speaker 2: It is very warm.
Speaker 1: Just got warm. It just was at my singing, little flush.
Speaker 2: It is nice singing, very effective. It's serenading. How often
Speaker 2: do you sing for April early days? Did you ever?
Speaker 2: Did she come over and you go, oh, what's that look? Good?
Speaker 2: Tone in the corner? No?
Speaker 1: My voice for comedy, really, I have honed it in
Speaker 1: so it's like you.
Speaker 2: Say, you say that, but it's just a little bit,
Speaker 2: a bit of soul in those give me a song.
Speaker 1: What's wrong with you? Honest?
Speaker 2: Just a little bit. It's too Sorry you haven't noticed
Speaker 2: my mustache.
Speaker 1: It's coming through. You can grow a good mustache.
Speaker 2: I absolutely know I can.
Speaker 1: But why is it coming back?
Speaker 2: Just thought change the season, change of Look. I'm ready
Speaker 2: for it, me too, And I thought spring will just
Speaker 2: be the season of mustaches.
Speaker 1: Really.
Speaker 2: Also, we're getting closer towards November. Everyone always says you're
Speaker 2: a lut a good hood still in November.
Speaker 1: But you know, ill afterhead start. I have a mustache
Speaker 1: on twenty four seven, So.
Speaker 2: I'm just I'm dabbling with it. Also, Laura, in an
Speaker 2: attempt to have more sex, I'm going to have the
Speaker 2: mustache because she really likes it.
Speaker 1: She does really like it, She's told me before. Don't
Speaker 1: blame her anyway. Sorry. Yeah, I'm coming off the back
Speaker 1: of a weekend in Perth. I have recovered.
Speaker 2: I thought you were about to cancel us with what
Speaker 2: or you're doing like nude stories.
Speaker 1: I wasn't nude. I had pants on. I just tucked
Speaker 1: it nicely.
Speaker 2: I was like, fuck, it's happened, It's happened. Lost it
Speaker 2: twelve months in and then.
Speaker 1: Sorry, how was Perth?
Speaker 2: What do you think of Perth?
Speaker 1: Look, it's a long way. It's a very long way
Speaker 1: from here. I went in thinking I wasn't there four
Speaker 1: hour flight. Then I got to the airport and I
Speaker 1: said five hours and ten minutes.
Speaker 2: I was like, oh fuck, who said it was four hours?
Speaker 1: I think I just thought it was.
Speaker 2: As you do, like, it makes sense if you ask
Speaker 2: me Perth say, yeah, it's.
Speaker 1: About fans about four hours?
Speaker 2: Did you raw dogged on the plane or no?
Speaker 1: Just watch a bit of TV. I didn't have a
Speaker 1: single beer on the plane. They're all back look at me,
Speaker 1: go wow. I know I was tempted, but I was like,
Speaker 1: oh no, it's a long fly. Then you know, you
Speaker 1: go back in time when you get there, so it's
Speaker 1: going to be a long day.
Speaker 2: What's a UFC crowd like? For those who haven't been
Speaker 2: to a UFC event.
Speaker 1: They're exactly how you think they're going to be, which
Speaker 1: is pretty fucking gross. Look rowdy.
Speaker 2: There was a lot of like, is it a family
Speaker 2: friendly environment?
Speaker 1: No, there's nothing family friendly about it.
Speaker 2: People killing each other in the ring.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Look, it was a bit. It was It was good,
Speaker 1: but like it's not. It can get a bit like
Speaker 1: April was like I'm trying to find you on TV
Speaker 1: but we had to turn it off. That was like
Speaker 1: fair enough. But what I will say is Perth we
Speaker 1: have a lot of two doing Dad fans and they
Speaker 1: were like, where's Maddie And I was like, I couldn't
Speaker 1: make it. Sorry about that, but yeah, quickly shout out
Speaker 1: to Linda, who works at the RAC Center, who is
Speaker 1: a day oner. She's from day one, listened to every
Speaker 1: the photo photo of Linda. I didn't get a photo
Speaker 1: with it. She's working poor things. She don't to be professional,
Speaker 1: but she just quickly came on to you guys look
Speaker 1: on you know, we actually read out one of her lies.
Speaker 1: Back in the first original Life section.
Speaker 2: We shout out to Linda. Yeah, good on the backbone
Speaker 2: of this podcast.
Speaker 1: You're doing great work.
Speaker 2: And also the events industry in Perth, thank you. My
Speaker 2: old was Linda.
Speaker 1: Oh don't I don't really know. She would say she
Speaker 1: was twenty twenty one. She'll love that, just twenty one.
Speaker 1: She looked great. But yeah, I went over and the
Speaker 1: other people said, oh my god, can I get on
Speaker 1: with it. You just want to know how many people ask? Yeah,
Speaker 1: four or five different people far, Yeah, that's pretty cool.
Speaker 1: I went over there with a toothache. The teeth heard me.
Speaker 1: The karma, Oh, the karma is coming thick and fast, the.
Speaker 2: Teeth karma's coast. The pressure of.
Speaker 1: That aeroplane, Oh my god, oh.
Speaker 2: My yeah, I think it.
Speaker 1: It was brutal for like the last just like the
Speaker 1: last twenty five minutes where you're like descending, you know,
Speaker 1: they're like, store your trade tables, put your seat back up.
Speaker 1: Made it hurt, and they're like put your brace yourself
Speaker 1: for a sore tooth. And then landed and I was fine,
Speaker 1: But then I had it all weekend and then I
Speaker 1: got back and another plane trip on the way back
Speaker 1: really fucking sent it off. So I've had to go
Speaker 1: from being the guy who gives nothing but dentists shit.
Speaker 2: Now you've come running to them for help.
Speaker 1: No I know. And they're like, oh it is because
Speaker 1: I haven't seen a dentist in so long. It's obviously
Speaker 1: a new dentist. And they were like, you just feel
Speaker 1: this format here and I was like, this is the trick,
Speaker 1: and wait for embass my credit card details. The girl
Speaker 1: on the desk was like, how long has it been
Speaker 1: since you've seen a dentist? And I was like for
Speaker 1: ten years. And she was like oh, oh, one of them.
Speaker 1: And I was like, oh fuck. They're like listed all
Speaker 1: your problems and I was like this, I've got too many.
Speaker 1: And then I sat down. The Dental HYGIENEUS meant me lovely,
Speaker 1: and the dentist also very lovely. That's their trick, they said, trickery.
Speaker 1: And it turns out that I need a tooth extracted.
Speaker 1: I've got to wait another two weeks before it can
Speaker 1: be extracted.
Speaker 2: Why do they just take it out then and there?
Speaker 1: I think because they want to essentially reduce the pain
Speaker 1: and information and any infection before they actually rip it out.
Speaker 1: I'm not a dentist. I just took their advice.
Speaker 2: You could be you know what you're talking about.
Speaker 1: It was like, and look, I'm a little bit like,
Speaker 1: am we going to be awake? A We're going to
Speaker 1: be awake with this? He's like, oh yeah, yeah, it's
Speaker 1: all these dentists list in there, going get him with
Speaker 1: the pain, get him back. We're not just mouth salesman.
Speaker 2: They could be under But he's like, no, I'm of
Speaker 2: course they did.
Speaker 1: Classic mouth salesman tried to sell them with a root canal,
Speaker 1: oldest trick in the book. If you do a root canal,
Speaker 1: they can save the tooth.
Speaker 2: What's the root canal worth? How much is that?
Speaker 1: Oh? It's like five grand? Oh shit, it's like I'll
Speaker 1: give you a couple of sleeping tablets knock out for
Speaker 1: sixty five bucks and rip it out of your head.
Speaker 1: I was like, and then I showed him that golf.
Speaker 1: I'm like, can you do something like this?
Speaker 2: Insurance?
Speaker 1: B Do I have insurance? Do you know? Can you
Speaker 1: get insured? Am I? I told I don't have any I
Speaker 1: don't have any healthcare. I've got no private health nothing
Speaker 1: but no insurance. Will I have a handwritten will? What
Speaker 1: is it to say? Well, I don't have any belongings,
Speaker 1: so what's the point of it. I have two kids,
Speaker 1: your surfboards, I'm taking it with me. So anyway, I
Speaker 1: got a couple of weeks of a sore mouth. So
Speaker 1: if I started to talk like this, it's because my
Speaker 1: mouth really hurt.
Speaker 2: So when they take the tooth out, will that just
Speaker 2: be gone? You have a gap in your set of teeth?
Speaker 2: Are you going to replace it with something.
Speaker 1: I don't really have the money to replace it with anything.
Speaker 1: What would I put in there a brand new can't
Speaker 1: are you gold tooth?
Speaker 2: Yeah? That would be, but then how much is that
Speaker 2: going to be worth?
Speaker 1: I wouldn't get real gold copper copper lead.
Speaker 2: You. You came to me with a really unique proposal,
Speaker 2: which was that when they extract the tooth, they said
Speaker 2: we welcome guests.
Speaker 1: I was like, come film it, record it, see what happens.
Speaker 1: It could be it could be funny.
Speaker 2: I don't know if I want to be in the room.
Speaker 1: We could be boring. I'll turn it up a bit.
Speaker 2: I'm sure I'll be like, ah, I don't know.
Speaker 1: If I don't like blood, I'm for me either. I'm
Speaker 1: so scared.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but hey, if you need me there, not just
Speaker 2: film content, but just to be there as a bit
Speaker 2: of reassurance, hold your hand. I'm more than happy to
Speaker 2: be that person I needed to pick me up. At least.
Speaker 2: Surely you won't be able to drive home.
Speaker 1: No, They're like you can't. I was like, oh, can
Speaker 1: I go under? They're like yeah, but it's about two
Speaker 1: hundred times the price. I'm like worth it? Put me under?
Speaker 2: Good luck?
Speaker 1: Two weeks, two weeks from now, two weeks exactly from now.
Speaker 1: I'll keep you updates. If it falls out on his own,
Speaker 1: that'll be fuck, that'd be amazing.
Speaker 2: Just do what? Oh myt dude, what's the one Tom
Speaker 2: Hanks on an island castaway when he gets the ice
Speaker 2: skating shoe and then he gets a rock and he
Speaker 2: uses that to get the tooth out?
Speaker 1: How did he find an ice skating shoe on an island?
Speaker 2: Because he was on a FedEx plane and all the
Speaker 2: packages would wash up on the beach.
Speaker 1: Surely there'd be some cool stuff on there. Well.
Speaker 2: I don't want to give away the movie in case
Speaker 2: people it's not true story of that movie.
Speaker 1: No, I fucking made that up.
Speaker 2: Sorry. Look, while you were gallivanting around Perth watching grown
Speaker 2: men wrestle each other in okay and also yeah, doing
Speaker 2: shits and putting it on stories for those of you
Speaker 2: who didn't see it, I've saved it.
Speaker 1: It's not that bad.
Speaker 2: People message me being like it's ash okay.
Speaker 1: No.
Speaker 2: April messaged me and was like, can you get to
Speaker 2: Perth save him? And I was like, I'll be there
Speaker 2: in four hours five. And whilst you were having a
Speaker 2: great weekend we had the funeral. Oh yes, not to
Speaker 2: change my annos. It was a beautiful Like it sounds
Speaker 2: weird to say it was.
Speaker 1: A one of those funerals are hard things to say,
Speaker 1: Like it was good.
Speaker 2: It was. It was a a great funeral in that
Speaker 2: those funerals. Yeah, like everyone spoke really really well. You know,
Speaker 2: sometimes you have speeches at weddings and there's always one
Speaker 2: person who just goes on for ages and ages and ages.
Speaker 2: But those who spoke at at the service, it was beautiful,
Speaker 2: really really moving. It was kind of hard with the kids.
Speaker 2: It was a long service, dude, really long.
Speaker 1: Was like two hours, Yeah, it was.
Speaker 2: It was like almost like almost three hours. Even even
Speaker 2: the shouldn't laugh, should laugh, but Neil was here, he'd
Speaker 2: want us to laugh. Neil RP. The second last speaker.
Speaker 2: They have like an MC similar to a wedding. You know,
Speaker 2: you have someone who's who's a priest. He wasn't that religious.
Speaker 2: It wasn't a priest. It was more like he actually
Speaker 2: he was great. He looked he's like a surfy dude.
Speaker 2: He looked. I thought he was one of Neil's friends.
Speaker 2: But his job, this guy he goes through and he
Speaker 2: like MC's funerals, and he kind of lent of because
Speaker 2: we're sitting it.
Speaker 1: I suppose the dead guy can't review him.
Speaker 2: I'm sure. I'm sure Neil was. He was no good,
Speaker 2: but he kind of leant over because we're sitting in
Speaker 2: the front row, and he's like, I've got a two
Speaker 2: thirty funeral, so I'm going to have to go soon.
Speaker 2: Because everything was a lot slower, and you know, speeches
Speaker 2: dragged out longer than participated, so he's like, I've got
Speaker 2: I've got another one to go to. I'm like, how
Speaker 2: many are you doing all weekend? What's the pay for that?
Speaker 2: That's great?
Speaker 1: Are you hiring?
Speaker 2: But the kids, the kids were great for like the
Speaker 2: first two speeches, and we explained them as well. Were
Speaker 2: totally upfront. We said, you know, this is our opportunity
Speaker 2: to say goodbye to Neil. My mom told me a
Speaker 2: story when she was a kid, she went to a
Speaker 2: funeral and it just burned into her brain that she
Speaker 2: remembers back then, I think open caskets were a lot
Speaker 2: more common.
Speaker 1: They're not going to wake up, are they?
Speaker 2: Well, she thought, like she was just it was such
Speaker 2: a scary thought, having, you know, at the front of
Speaker 2: the room, having the coffin there and knowing that the
Speaker 2: person's in there. The coffin was open for my mom
Speaker 2: and she's like that. I couldn't sleep at night, and
Speaker 2: so I was so nervous about like I think I
Speaker 2: thought you were.
Speaker 1: Going to tell me the person actually wasn't dead, and
Speaker 1: they were like, what are you guys doing it?
Speaker 2: It does happen not to us. But I wasn't sure if,
Speaker 2: like being completely upfront with all the details at the funeral,
Speaker 2: if I should continue to be upfront and say Neel
Speaker 2: is in that box, or if I say, yeah, I
Speaker 2: could just that information is not kind of critical to
Speaker 2: the whole situation. So I was like, maybe I just
Speaker 2: removed that it.
Speaker 1: Could be like that symbolic of his life or something.
Speaker 1: Yeahs open no close casket. But I was really nervous
Speaker 1: about that. I didn't want the girls to think, like,
Speaker 1: why is he there's a dead body in there.
Speaker 2: That's it. That's it. So they didn't ask, which I
Speaker 2: think was the best thing for it. But maybe, like
Speaker 2: I think two speeches in the girls were like, well,
Speaker 2: we're kind of bored now.
Speaker 1: And that's fair, like you know, three and five. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they don't understand the seriousness of it for everyone else
Speaker 1: that you know, because they would have only known Neil
Speaker 1: for their short lives. But then they probab don't understand completely.
Speaker 2: And even the MC when they were making noise, he
Speaker 2: was like a kid, like, let them make noise.
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 2: Everyone everybody was in Hawaiian shirts, so it wasn't a
Speaker 2: subdued everyone in black traditional funeral. But the best thing is,
Speaker 2: if anyone has any funerals coming up, which I hope
Speaker 2: they don't, bring in some coloring pencils and coloring in
Speaker 2: books for the kids. Yeah, like that was such a
Speaker 2: great move when they were getting restless and just having
Speaker 2: them sit on the floor and color in.
Speaker 1: You could print out pictures of the casket, like color
Speaker 1: and how you think it should be.
Speaker 2: That's Ash's advice, not mine.
Speaker 1: Oh, I'm just trying to make use of the whole situation.
Speaker 1: Do the girls sit there for the whole time?
Speaker 2: No, we had to. They colored in for a bit,
Speaker 2: then they got hungry because you know, it's a long time.
Speaker 2: So then Laura was consoling her mum. So then I
Speaker 2: was kind of the person who was We go to
Speaker 2: the back of the room and then we'd color at
Speaker 2: the back of the room so they could run around
Speaker 2: for a bit and then they're like, oh, we're bored here.
Speaker 2: We went back in. But then also Laura at that point,
Speaker 2: Laura and Mumber in tears and so then they didn't
Speaker 2: want to leave Mum because Mum was crying. Yeah, and
Speaker 2: so that was a bit confusing for a lot of
Speaker 2: everyone's in tears.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's so many winged emotions for them. And kids
Speaker 1: aren't very good at reading the room, are they.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I think they did well to be there for that long,
Speaker 1: Like yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: And then someone did message in and say that they
Speaker 2: told their kids when someone in the family passed away,
Speaker 2: they said they're in the sky. Now, I think a
Speaker 2: lot of people use this kind of theory there saying
Speaker 2: lie that it is a bit of a lie, but
Speaker 2: saying the stars they're family members who have passed away,
Speaker 2: So you know Grandma is up in the sky.
Speaker 1: That's a lie.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's absolutely lie, but it's nice. It's nice. But
Speaker 2: we talked about it before. When when it's a cloudy
Speaker 2: night and the kids are like, ah.
Speaker 1: Where's going, Well, I look, condolences to Laura and her family.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's never easy. I know, like we've spoken
Speaker 1: about Neil and the whole situation for the last few months.
Speaker 2: So yeah, life is sured, life is shured, and joy
Speaker 2: every second.
Speaker 1: Absolutely, That's what I always say.
Speaker 2: Ash I know that we always say we never give advice.
Speaker 1: We always say that I have.
Speaker 2: Some advice, but it's not from me, it's from my mum.
Speaker 2: So you know it's going to.
Speaker 1: Be good, okay, because we never give advice on this podcast.
Speaker 2: Imagine this. Imagine a drink. It's going to help you
Speaker 2: and the family wind down after dinner, before you go
Speaker 2: to bed.
Speaker 1: I'm listening and.
Speaker 2: It comes in a tin or sashet's I'm confused, and
Speaker 2: it's called ovaltine sleep. Ashal, All you have to do
Speaker 2: I put a sachet into a cup here with some
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Speaker 1: I'm excited.
Speaker 2: Get that down your gullet Try that. What do you think?
Speaker 1: That's delicious?
Speaker 2: It's rich and magnesium, it has a calming chock delicious goodness,
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Speaker 1: Oh, I can't wait to take some home to my kids.
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Speaker 1: The Quest for Free Time.
Speaker 2: People are calling it the best kids book ever written.
Speaker 1: That's what we're calling it.
Speaker 2: It is super easy to ender. All you have to
Speaker 2: do is head to at Ovaltine Underscore Australia and using
Speaker 2: only emojis, tell us how you feel about your family's
Speaker 2: wind down routine and ash tag who is.
Speaker 1: It a fellow sleep deprived parent? There's a lot of them.
Speaker 1: There's two of them right here who might like to
Speaker 1: try it.
Speaker 2: To make matters worse, Nash, It is on the worst
Speaker 2: weeks of the calendar.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, imagine going off the back of a funeral
Speaker 1: us this week.
Speaker 2: I was like, can it get any worse? And then
Speaker 2: and then WhatsApp chat with some of the other parents
Speaker 2: from daycare.
Speaker 1: They were like, it's book week, gosh, and some parents
Speaker 1: this is where they thrive. This is where they live.
Speaker 1: They love this shit. April and not so much.
Speaker 2: You know who us thrive? Alisha, Laura's sister, Is that right? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Why thrive?
Speaker 2: Can I can I just actually, can I show you
Speaker 2: that what she did?
Speaker 1: I did see one thing, but show me, show me
Speaker 1: what you got. For non parents out there that are listening,
Speaker 1: book Week is a week in which your kids go
Speaker 1: to kindy and dress up as their favorite book, not
Speaker 1: the book itself, the characters. If you went as the book,
Speaker 1: that'd be funny. But it's a week, it's not a day,
Speaker 1: and I feel like parents are put under unnecessary pressure
Speaker 1: to perform. Not me. I just ignore it.
Speaker 2: Well, I think we're doing it wrong in Australia.
Speaker 1: It shouldn't go on. I'm listening.
Speaker 2: It shouldn't be.
Speaker 1: They should be book Year, book Day, book Day. It's
Speaker 1: don't the same ring though Book Day, Book Day is great.
Speaker 1: The annual that should change your name, the annual Book Day.
Speaker 1: There we go. Someone petition.
Speaker 2: Someone messaged me from the UK and they are really confused.
Speaker 2: They're like, what the what is this? What's book Week?
Speaker 2: Why a week? Who made it a week? Why make
Speaker 2: it more than one day? One day is enough. It's
Speaker 2: hard enough trying to scrounge together a costume for one
Speaker 2: day of the year. Why are we doing it for
Speaker 2: five whole days now? I got.
Speaker 1: I got a message from someone in New Zealand. They're like,
Speaker 1: Australians are suckers?
Speaker 2: Who made this decision?
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 2: Stop it right now.
Speaker 1: I've got a hack for that. Please. You're in that
Speaker 1: WhatsApp group. It's called what I like to call the
Speaker 1: costume exchange. So they just rotate. So if you've got
Speaker 1: five friends, give me out.
Speaker 2: Yeah here.
Speaker 1: All you do is get one costume each, rotate, rotate
Speaker 1: to your left every day.
Speaker 2: What are some of the costumes on rotation you could.
Speaker 1: Have I don't know, Harry mclary because the book week Bluie.
Speaker 1: You could have everyone just picks one and then you
Speaker 1: just swap swap it out.
Speaker 2: It's very good. We actually kind of did that for
Speaker 2: the Easter parade we had. It was just a whore
Speaker 2: of a hat that went the whole hat. It just
Speaker 2: went around some multiple families. East apparade was on different
Speaker 2: days and it was a great beautiful Easter hat that
Speaker 2: we then got at the end. By the end it
Speaker 2: was looking a bit sad, but yeah, it was just
Speaker 2: a similar similar concept.
Speaker 1: Right, Like I said, the amount of pressure put on
Speaker 1: to be like, we're very fortunate that we do this
Speaker 1: for a job, so like we probably have a little
Speaker 1: bit of time that we can get this shit together.
Speaker 1: But people were very busy. People work like trainees work
Speaker 1: like seven toll five. Like moment Mike send his kid
Speaker 1: just just didn't even bother. It was like, I just
Speaker 1: none of us have time to do that.
Speaker 2: I know I do. Walking in and the difference in
Speaker 2: kids that were dressed up as they skip into the
Speaker 2: classroom and they're like, yeah, I'm a princess and I'm Spiderman,
Speaker 2: and then you see the kid.
Speaker 1: Who's like I'm a kid, and it's like, oh fuck.
Speaker 1: So look, if you're listening, you've got a group of friends,
Speaker 1: you've got a mother's group, We've got whatever it might be,
Speaker 1: costume exchange, all them out, all those cushumes out. I
Speaker 1: know some kids are going to pick up on it.
Speaker 1: But if they go to different daycares love it, that's beautiful.
Speaker 1: If they go to different daycares and you're quite close
Speaker 1: to these people because you've got a lot of family here,
Speaker 1: like your sister's got a couple of kids, so it's
Speaker 1: like you could just be like, we've got two printers outfits.
Speaker 1: What do you going?
Speaker 2: Did ask your dress up.
Speaker 1: Well, I did put a call out a lot.
Speaker 2: Of people, a little learn of people. A lot of
Speaker 2: people were saying, hey, this is we didn't actually plan
Speaker 2: it to be.
Speaker 1: No, it just worked out.
Speaker 2: I mean, genius accident, accidental genius.
Speaker 1: I kind of wish we knew we could have played
Speaker 1: a little bit more on it, you.
Speaker 2: Know, we kin't of it was enoughter thought. But book week,
Speaker 2: I don't know if you guys know this.
Speaker 1: We have a kids book, we are authors.
Speaker 2: We've mentioned it multiple dance a lot of times.
Speaker 1: Here. I was like I'm turning this.
Speaker 2: Off now, but everyone kept saying, your kid's going to
Speaker 2: dress up as a character from the book.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you were me great idea because I did put
Speaker 1: the call out for costume ideas because we're struggling. We
Speaker 1: were struggling for like what do we do? What do
Speaker 1: we do? Someone wrote back saying it's the worst week
Speaker 1: of the year. Amen, Amen to that. That's one. Someone
Speaker 1: also gave me the repurposing idea. But then I got
Speaker 1: a lot of people being like, dress oscar up as you,
Speaker 1: and I was like, we're into that. Yeah. As soon
Speaker 1: as I was like, hey, would you like to dress
Speaker 1: like me? I was like, what does that mean.
Speaker 2: It's got to work the podcast with Matt.
Speaker 1: Do I have to be as depressed as you? Yes,
Speaker 1: yes you do. So anyway, I dressed him up as me,
Speaker 1: and I'm going to show you a little photo.
Speaker 2: I love that so much.
Speaker 1: So we I went down to like the little like
Speaker 1: two dollars shop, which also shout out to Bins down
Speaker 1: at Warrywood. They have got a sponsor, not a sponsor,
Speaker 1: could be. They've got a shitload of costumes down there.
Speaker 1: Like holy I thought it was one aisle, but eighty
Speaker 1: percent of their shop is costumes.
Speaker 2: I love that.
Speaker 1: And so I bought some like stick on tattoos, and
Speaker 1: I was like, this is gonna take me forever. And
Speaker 1: I was like, I'll do a few and then I'll
Speaker 1: get some face paint, draw some lines, honestly, just make
Speaker 1: it look a lot more. He went to kindy as
Speaker 1: that there was going to be a break in the
Speaker 1: day for Oscar because he had an orientation day his
Speaker 1: new big school, which I do bookwork. I don't know,
Speaker 1: we'll find out next year.
Speaker 2: At a big school.
Speaker 1: Yeah, dude, what do they do? Like yard time?
Speaker 2: It's huge. Marley went to the local school and they
Speaker 2: had they had a Book Week parade and it was
Speaker 2: like the whole entire school was dressed up, the teachers
Speaker 2: were dressed up.
Speaker 1: How could they tell who's who?
Speaker 2: And it was music was pumping.
Speaker 1: It was like.
Speaker 2: There was a huge parade. I was like, I'd go
Speaker 2: to that.
Speaker 1: I'm into it. So yesterday I was Abril took Oscar
Speaker 1: up to for an orientation day at his new schoolche
Speaker 1: really has that? Yeah yeah, and then back to Gindy
Speaker 1: and he had a great day.
Speaker 2: Because anything sticky, kid's gonna hate. How do you go?
Speaker 1: He made draw one on underneath so that if it
Speaker 1: does come off, your pulled off, your.
Speaker 2: Stick got one a contingency mustache. It's my kid, very
Speaker 2: very clever, very clever. What was basically like, give me
Speaker 2: some tats. So she was like, Pisa sticker. Anyway, it
Speaker 2: is Friday, and hence the end of book week, Matthew,
Speaker 2: which I am so glad about.
Speaker 1: What about you because I had a lot of people
Speaker 1: say to me, if you're going to dress Oscar up
Speaker 1: as you? A lot of people actually also say a
Speaker 1: lot of people that was very good?
Speaker 2: Was it not really? Way off? Way off?
Speaker 1: Okay? A lot of people like.
Speaker 2: Anyone wondering that's Ash doing an impersonation of Donald Trump.
Speaker 1: That was my Hillary Clinton. A lot of people like,
Speaker 1: you should dress Oscar uppers Matt because now we had
Speaker 1: that joke where you what you got in for his
Speaker 1: birthday was things that you'd wear shoes, so we can
Speaker 1: contemplate it, and I was like, don't give this guy anymore.
Speaker 2: Well, it was easier for Marley because she's got lots
Speaker 2: of princess dresses, so it was just like, oh, now
Speaker 2: she's tinker Bell, and now she's Bell, and now she's Elsa.
Speaker 2: That was great, changed the color of the Yeah, just
Speaker 2: another Disney princess. Lola, just typical second child. She didn't
Speaker 2: didn't want anything to do with being a princess. She
Speaker 2: was a t rex, which was actually a rhino. She
Speaker 2: called it a rhino. I was like, that's a t
Speaker 2: rex and she's like, shut the fuck up, it's a rhino.
Speaker 1: I was listening here, dickhead. Sorry.
Speaker 2: Then after that she was an astronaut, and then after
Speaker 2: that she was Penguin, and I was trying all week.
Speaker 2: I was like, does anybody was just like planning to
Speaker 2: see does anyone want to dress up as Dad? This
Speaker 2: guy my book, and Marley was like, what dress up
Speaker 2: as you and not be a princess?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 2: And I was like, damn it, I thought, Marley, because
Speaker 2: she likes me more than she likes anyone else.
Speaker 1: Who went as an astronaut, someone wins Lola, Okay, very good, Yeah,
Speaker 1: Buzzler and Lola.
Speaker 2: People who listen to the podcast will be familiar with
Speaker 2: the fact that Lola fucking hates me.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: So I was like, Mally's my best bet here, but
Speaker 2: she's such a princess kind of girl that she like
Speaker 2: the thought of not wearing a princess dress was like hell.
Speaker 2: So she was like nah. So Friday, I was like, Lola,
Speaker 2: how do we feel about dressing up as dad? The
Speaker 2: good thing was ash Laura's away right now. And the
Speaker 2: only time when Lola likes me is when she's got
Speaker 2: absolutely fucking no one, but I'm the only option left,
Speaker 2: and she's like, all right, I'll be nice to you.
Speaker 2: So she was like, all right, let's let's see what
Speaker 2: I got. And so then put her in the pants,
Speaker 2: put her in the shirt. She's dressings me. So she's
Speaker 2: dressings as a little boy. And even Marley I was like, ma, like,
Speaker 2: help me out. Here, and Mollie was like, wow, that
Speaker 2: looks great. She looks so pretty. I was on board,
Speaker 2: and Laula was kind of like, am I like this?
Speaker 2: Then finally I was like you're and she fucking loved it.
Speaker 2: And then I was gonna say, like, worst case now,
Speaker 2: you just call help. But then she actually was so
Speaker 2: into it that the rest of the morning, if I
Speaker 2: was like hey, Lola, She's like, don't call me that,
Speaker 2: call me dad, call me daddy. And so I was like,
Speaker 2: even Marley, she would only answer if someone was calling
Speaker 2: her daddy. Wow, loved it.
Speaker 1: That's great.
Speaker 2: Yeah, she was punched in me.
Speaker 1: So you find out how she's going to be after her.
Speaker 2: Because she's like, I'm dressed as my daddy. And I
Speaker 2: was like, this is what I've been wanting from day
Speaker 2: dot and I finally have it. Oh it feels good.
Speaker 1: Mine was all good, except for one tiny, tiny thing,
Speaker 1: which kids can be mean. So for example, bust.
Speaker 2: Fuck on your bed, buddy, ho man, and I look
Speaker 2: at the face and the doors.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry.
Speaker 2: Dog has been under the table the whole time, and
Speaker 2: he's just dropped his guts.
Speaker 1: For a second, I thought it was my breath, and
Speaker 1: I was like, oh.
Speaker 2: God on your bed, Buster, Yeah, you've been it through.
Speaker 1: Okay, good boy, buddy.
Speaker 2: That is eggy. That is I thought it was more
Speaker 2: broccoli he has had when the girls that finished the
Speaker 2: scrambled eggs, he finishes it off.
Speaker 1: So that's it.
Speaker 2: That's all I apologize.
Speaker 1: So Oscar. After after he went as me, I was
Speaker 1: getting him dressed for bed after bath and we were,
Speaker 1: of course after Bathball kind of read our book, which is.
Speaker 3: A great book, by the way, and he was trying
Speaker 3: to tell me that some of the kids were laughing
Speaker 3: at him for going as me, and I was like, oh, like,
Speaker 3: what did you say?
Speaker 1: He said, well, he said, where's the book your dad wrote?
Speaker 2: Fucking dropped the mic.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah. He was like I felt mean. But then
Speaker 1: he was like that wire mean, and I was like,
Speaker 1: I was like, who said that? And he was like Lenny,
Speaker 1: which is like my mate's one of my best mates kids,
Speaker 1: and I was like, oh, yeah, I'll get him. I'll
Speaker 1: get his dad.
Speaker 2: It's good I did. That was my fear with Lola
Speaker 2: because a lot of the kids were dresses, you know,
Speaker 2: fairies and princesses, and then she's just there dressed is
Speaker 2: me me?
Speaker 1: Dad? Yeah? Everyone's going as a princess. It's nice for
Speaker 1: them to go with something different. Yeah, they're in the
Speaker 1: book too, so it's like, as much as I could
Speaker 1: have just gone to themselves, Yeah, there's live hack.
Speaker 2: As much as I hate book Week, it was a
Speaker 2: perfect way round off the week. Yeah, very self indulgent,
Speaker 2: but hey, I'm an needy guy. Hey I haven't you.
Speaker 2: I don't want to call it a segment because I
Speaker 2: don't know if it's going to Actually I've got a couple,
Speaker 2: so it was going to run for at least two,
Speaker 2: maybe three episodes. I don't have a song. Unfortunately, did
Speaker 2: you see a song?
Speaker 1: Okay?
Speaker 2: Can you sing for me? Parenting Hack or fuck that?
Speaker 1: In what melody?
Speaker 2: Like an Elvis kind of vibe?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 1: No, oh okay, maybe we'll scrap that. We'll come back
Speaker 1: to you.
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm going to send you a video. Right. Someone
Speaker 2: has put this on social media, and not that I
Speaker 2: ever want to tear down another parent ash because hey,
Speaker 2: if it works for them and it keeps them happy
Speaker 2: and their kids happy, amazing, fantastic. Who am I to judge?
Speaker 2: But at the same time, I'm going to judge, And
Speaker 2: you know, sometimes you go to the commons, and you're like,
Speaker 2: I hope people agree with me in thinking that this
Speaker 2: is a terrible idea, but this is their parenting hack,
Speaker 2: right this one.
Speaker 1: Watch it away, all right? So you don't want to
Speaker 1: shoot on these people.
Speaker 2: Well no, I know them, don't know them. We shouldn't
Speaker 2: shit on them. But at the same time we will.
Speaker 2: We're not going to say who they are. That makes
Speaker 2: me feel physically ill. Why would you do that any Okay,
Speaker 2: let me explain.
Speaker 1: Let me explain what I've just watched. And it was
Speaker 1: very in I get it.
Speaker 2: Beautiful music, beautiful music, but that's really dialing into that
Speaker 2: innocence there.
Speaker 1: Okay, it's a video and it says you know, people
Speaker 1: do those videos where it's like, this is your sign.
Speaker 1: This is signed to change your hair color. Yeah, something constructive. Sure,
Speaker 1: this is a sign to wake your kids up after
Speaker 1: bedtime for a surprise movie sleepover in the living room. Wow,
Speaker 1: my god, can you imagine wake in loll her up
Speaker 1: after she's just fallen asleep, going surprise, We're gonna watch
Speaker 1: the Disney Princesses. Be like, fuck, what world is that
Speaker 1: a good idea? Like why don't you just like you
Speaker 1: don't what kids, You've after dinner, you've had you've had
Speaker 1: a RESTful day. We're gonna watch We're gonna watch a
Speaker 1: movie all together as a family. Beautiful, don't wake them
Speaker 1: up and be like if I work on, he'd be
Speaker 1: so confused, and it's like, what is it morning?
Speaker 2: Don you just look at the comments.
Speaker 1: I've gone to the point of suffocating myself. If I
Speaker 1: had to call kids someone who said I would never
Speaker 1: with love, I don't understand.
Speaker 2: And hey, if their kids like it, what have you
Speaker 2: got for me?
Speaker 1: Let me know how you feel about it tomorrow. That
Speaker 1: is a terrible, a bad idea.
Speaker 2: I want to know, Okay, I want to know. Surely,
Speaker 2: surely he's baiting people by saying that got to be
Speaker 2: that that's a bait video, right, I mean hook line.
Speaker 1: Let's sleeping kids, lie they need this sleep. If they're
Speaker 1: older kids, sure, and you're like and they're like, hey, dad,
Speaker 1: my favorite football team's playing at like three am tonight
Speaker 1: because it's in England. Can you wake me up? Done?
Speaker 1: Hang a minute, let's gashlight your kids into thinking they're
Speaker 1: going to have a full night sleep and then wake
Speaker 1: them up after an hour and be like, surprise, you
Speaker 1: need to fulfill my needs. Now, this is my needs.
Speaker 1: There is because they don't need that. I can watch
Speaker 1: that whatever. It's on demand. Things are on demand now.
Speaker 1: Maybe fifty years ago when it was like, holy shit,
Speaker 1: there's one movie on TV a week. Get up, kids,
Speaker 1: because you really want to watch it. That shit's Disney's
Speaker 1: on demand.
Speaker 2: I love your aide right now. It's exactly what I
Speaker 2: wanted to. Thank you.
Speaker 1: That's okay, that is a terrible, terrible hack.
Speaker 2: Should we do live?
Speaker 1: This is wise?
Speaker 4: Tell me loud, tell me little line?
Speaker 1: Can I just start with one that I've sort of
Speaker 1: merged into two that I've been using with Oscar.
Speaker 2: I thought you'd never asked.
Speaker 1: So he's been picking his nose a lot eating it.
Speaker 1: I caught immediate.
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, Morley loves it.
Speaker 1: Love it is tasty.
Speaker 2: Did you ever eat just quickly? Did you ever pick
Speaker 2: your nose and eat it?
Speaker 1: Oh? Yeah you did. Everyone did at some point. I
Speaker 1: remember as a kid, I save space.
Speaker 2: Yeah no. I remember in primary school looking at other
Speaker 2: kids eating their boogers and everyone's like this so delicious,
Speaker 2: And I remember thinking, okay.
Speaker 1: Wait till you try your ear wax.
Speaker 2: I remember trying it going I want to see what
Speaker 2: all the fuss is about, not into.
Speaker 1: It depends what you got up there, my friend, Oh,
Speaker 1: what's it like?
Speaker 2: Salty delicious?
Speaker 1: Like tasting yourself. That's disgusting. So yeah, he's been picking
Speaker 1: his nose and also he's he's been like avoiding to
Speaker 1: wash his hands. I'm like, go and wash your hands.
Speaker 1: Like he thinks that I'm dumb first of all, so
Speaker 1: he'll go it's not far off. It was about him,
Speaker 1: not me, And he was I know when he's pooping
Speaker 1: because he's in there and the door's open, dummy. And
Speaker 1: then I'm like, hmm, didn't hear it flash? And I
Speaker 1: didn't hear a hand. I'm like, do you wash your hands?
Speaker 1: And the flush? Like I was like, how come we
Speaker 1: didn't flush and the tap didn't go? And I know
Speaker 1: you can't reach the soap thing without an adult. Oh
Speaker 1: like just so and that and yeah, washing hands and
Speaker 1: picking a nose. So I started to say, do you
Speaker 1: know kids who picked their nose don't have any friends,
Speaker 1: It's like And then I was also like, oh, kids
Speaker 1: who don't wash their hands, no one likes the kiddy
Speaker 1: smells like shit, so you won't have any threat.
Speaker 2: We always like to hero the creative lies, just like
Speaker 2: very simple. If you think you know, you're a fucking loser.
Speaker 1: At first I started saying, if you don't wash your hands,
Speaker 1: they'll fall off and here webbly like, but then I'll
Speaker 1: never have to wash my hands because they won't have any. Also,
Speaker 1: don't fart. Yeah, that was the one I've been doing
Speaker 1: with Oscar and well, let you off works.
Speaker 2: It doesn't stink that. Oh, come on, you've smelt worse. Okay,
Speaker 2: this one is one that's not been submitted and it's
Speaker 2: one that I saw. It was in the media doing
Speaker 2: the rounds. Okay, it's on the project. Actually shut out
Speaker 2: shouted the project. We were on the last week. I
Speaker 2: don't know if you watched it.
Speaker 1: Come on New Hosts episode. Yeah, hey project, Ye Cody,
Speaker 1: we come on for so ash.
Speaker 2: This is from a celebrity what's a professional athlete international
Speaker 2: as well? It's always good to see what the parents
Speaker 2: overseas are doing. In terms of line.
Speaker 4: New Zealand is not considered the international from the UK.
Speaker 4: His name is Callum plays for Carlisles United.
Speaker 2: You know the team. Come on, bro, big socker fan.
Speaker 2: Seems when since you were a semi professional player when
Speaker 2: you were younger.
Speaker 1: I was not a semi professional in anything, maybe nose
Speaker 1: picking and eating been David Beckham.
Speaker 2: So he and his wife they lighted their kids and
Speaker 2: they say their birthdays are on different days each year.
Speaker 2: So Abby twenty six and her husband Callum twenty seven,
Speaker 2: who themselves very young in the UK, how they do it?
Speaker 2: Very young mother enough to do exactly crap weather kids.
Speaker 2: Didn't you live in London for a while is So
Speaker 2: he's a footballer, right, and they made the decision to
Speaker 2: ensure that both parents could be there on their child's
Speaker 2: special days. They've got two kids, but obviously being a footballer,
Speaker 2: as I'm sure you are aware, someone who's semi I
Speaker 2: can't talk someone of the semi professional playing away games.
Speaker 2: I don't know who's going to be in town. So
Speaker 2: they just flat out light of their kids because kids
Speaker 2: don't know dates like their kids are. Kids are five
Speaker 2: and three, right, I don't know if it's the sixteenth
Speaker 2: of March.
Speaker 1: So they just say, actually birthdays today, shut up, making
Speaker 1: sure that it happens when everyone's in the house. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's kind of notice, kind of sweet, kind of sweet
Speaker 1: that that's their rule, that everyone's going to be home.
Speaker 1: I mean, the kid's going to be confused. Why eventually
Speaker 1: they will? How long can you keep up this facade?
Speaker 2: Till six seven? I think seven day to birth?
Speaker 1: Smile?
Speaker 2: Yeah, but does ask A follow a calendar? He's got
Speaker 2: his own phone.
Speaker 4: I don't know, actually, because okay, here we go, do
Speaker 4: kids for wait a minute?
Speaker 2: This morning, just do you kids know what time it is?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 2: I have no idea idiots. This morning, Lulla woke up
Speaker 2: and she goes, is it Christmas?
Speaker 1: I should have run with it. Oh, you missed an opportunity.
Speaker 2: I was like, what do you mean? And she goes,
Speaker 2: is it Christmas day to day? And I was like no.
Speaker 2: She goes, oh, when is Christmas? And I said it's
Speaker 2: in a few months. And she's like, fair enough.
Speaker 1: Just how many sleeps? That's usually how many sleeps? I
Speaker 1: was got, you've got big school next year, it's like
Speaker 1: how many sleeps? I said a lot? It's like ten
Speaker 1: tomorrow like ten. I'm like a lot. More is like
Speaker 1: a thousand. I was like, there's a lot of numbers
Speaker 1: between ten and thousand.
Speaker 2: My guy.
Speaker 1: I think it's a great idea. I think I think
Speaker 1: it's sweet. It's also very cheeky. Okay. This one comes
Speaker 1: from a DM by the name of James. Hello, James,
Speaker 1: love that, thank you for reaching out. She's like, I
Speaker 1: told my daughter that kids is turned red when they lie,
Speaker 1: but only parents can see it. She would enter the
Speaker 1: room with her hands covering her ears, and I knew
Speaker 1: I was in for a good lie, very good, very good.
Speaker 2: It was so good I did like a little fist bump.
Speaker 1: Ah right, such a great story.
Speaker 2: Well, Charles, Okay, this one is from one of our listeners,
Speaker 2: DM d us name is Yam.
Speaker 1: Also here sure is Yam.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I won't give her full from.
Speaker 1: The Potato family, mister and missus Yam.
Speaker 2: So she says, here's a lie. My husband tells our
Speaker 2: daughter that you might enjoy.
Speaker 1: I'll let you know if I might enjoy it.
Speaker 2: The TV is powered by when you're eating your dinner.
Speaker 2: If you won't eat it, it won't work anymore. So
Speaker 2: one broccoli equals five minutes, a mouthful of carrots equals
Speaker 2: four minutes. She said, it's worked all months so far.
Speaker 1: All month. So they figure it out and like guys,
Speaker 1: the TV still on, hang on a sad I don't
Speaker 1: know how. They also don't know minutes.
Speaker 2: That's very good.
Speaker 1: That's good though, it is very good.
Speaker 2: We love that we went for a period with no
Speaker 2: TV during dinner time.
Speaker 1: How did they go down?
Speaker 2: Hit me? Sometimes the kids were amazing, and I was like,
Speaker 2: I am an incredible parent right now just watching my
Speaker 2: kids sit there and eat. And then other times so
Speaker 2: they're like, I couldn't sit still for more than five seconds.
Speaker 2: We hate this. So last night, Laura's away, so I'm
Speaker 2: gonna put TV back on for dinner time.
Speaker 1: Oh, don't tell Laura that it's so good. It's so good.
Speaker 1: I love the other day where I was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I think I was here with Oskar and that's right.
Speaker 1: You said to Mary. You were like, oh, oh, mommy
Speaker 1: doesn't want you to watch the screen. And Laura's around
Speaker 1: and goes, we don't want her to watch the screen.
Speaker 1: I just laughed, and I always like track it on.
Speaker 1: If you do have a lie you want to submit
Speaker 1: to us, please send us a DM a two Doting
Speaker 1: Dads or on the Facebook group same thing. Two Doting
Speaker 1: Dads is humming along nicely two.
Speaker 2: Point one thousand members.
Speaker 1: Two point two as of today.
Speaker 2: Mike, Oh way, Jesus, look at me go going off
Speaker 2: in their questions.
Speaker 1: Ash, yes, we do have questions.
Speaker 2: I'll go first. I want to put you on the
Speaker 2: spot here. This is a question submitted by one of
Speaker 2: the longest running fans of the podcast, Maddie Jay. I
Speaker 2: want to know ask have you had to explain to
Speaker 2: your kids? I'm assuming not because Macy's very young, but
Speaker 2: maybe Oscar about periods function.
Speaker 1: We asked that question because are we April's currently on
Speaker 1: a period. Shout out to April, shout out. I hope
Speaker 1: you're doing it okay, I hope you feeling good. Season
Speaker 1: trying to tread really lightly over here. And I was like,
Speaker 1: as Oscar ever asked you about like a tamporn or
Speaker 1: a pad and she was like, yeah, yeah. He got
Speaker 1: a pad out of my bag once and was like,
Speaker 1: are these mummies nappies? Kinda were having this conversation yesterday
Speaker 1: in front of Oscar and he was like, we're a
Speaker 1: bit sheepish, and I was like, it's okay, by, but
Speaker 1: it's okay, buddy. Mmy shits herself all the time. That's
Speaker 1: about to the extent that we I've had. I mean,
Speaker 1: like you said, Mace's quite young, and she's still on
Speaker 1: one word sentence.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so she's not ready for like, this is a period.
Speaker 2: It happened to you once a month.
Speaker 1: She was like, well, you know what happened to your eggs?
Speaker 2: I don't even know because it happened to happen to usk.
Speaker 2: I don't think Laura has told the girls about periods.
Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure she has it because my sister was
Speaker 2: around and she took the kids out for a little
Speaker 2: little treat, went to the cafe. Kids had to go
Speaker 2: to the toilet. My sister also went to the toilet,
Speaker 2: so they all went together, and then as she pulled
Speaker 2: her pants down, they saw a tampon. Moley was like,
Speaker 2: what the hell is that? This?
Speaker 1: What the hell got.
Speaker 2: Mouse coming out? And my sister was like, oh no,
Speaker 2: it's just that's mummy's in a period. And and then
Speaker 2: Mollie was like, who's doing what now? And her kids
Speaker 2: like they've seen in that same scenario of taking the
Speaker 2: kids in the bathroom. There was one time because I
Speaker 2: said to my sister, I was like, like, when do
Speaker 2: you tell your kids? And she was like why she
Speaker 2: was using a pad, went to the bathroom. Kids saw
Speaker 2: the pad were.
Speaker 1: Like bleeding, Oh my god.
Speaker 2: So she explained to them it happens once a month,
Speaker 2: and uh so then now Molly's like, how many sleeps?
Speaker 1: Very good? Thank you, very good.
Speaker 2: So I'm now hoping like it's up to me to
Speaker 2: tell my kids about periods.
Speaker 1: God help us, that's up to Laura. Mate.
Speaker 2: I'm doing a show meself.
Speaker 1: Kids, I've got a story to tell you.
Speaker 2: It must be scarier. And I'm like, once a month
Speaker 2: you will stop bleeding. I'm controllably, I know, like for
Speaker 2: a week you may die. We don't know.
Speaker 1: In the olden days, you would stand in a ditch
Speaker 1: for a week long. And these days we have these
Speaker 1: little things called I love that. It's like this is
Speaker 1: a mouse in you for Jina, Oh funny stuff. I
Speaker 1: have a question for you.
Speaker 2: I thought you were like, you're gonna ask a question.
Speaker 1: No, I wasn't. I was looking through something different, singing
Speaker 1: a song. I've got a question for you. Might not
Speaker 1: be as applicable to you because you've got two girls,
Speaker 1: and girls quite sensible, maybe Lola not so sensible. Is
Speaker 1: it okay to let your child do dangerous things but safely?
Speaker 2: So?
Speaker 1: What I mean by that is it was like walk
Speaker 1: on the table, or make sure you don't fall off
Speaker 1: so that they can know where the boundaries are, or
Speaker 1: do you think it's just like a no go.
Speaker 2: Look, there is a line with anything. Obviously, if it's
Speaker 2: going to be an activity where they're risking serious injury,
Speaker 2: I think it would be very negligent to allow your
Speaker 2: child to still take part in that activity. If they
Speaker 2: are doing an activity which if they have an accident,
Speaker 2: it'll be like a little fall, a little grays I
Speaker 2: think it's okay. As an example, lash just down the
Speaker 2: road from my daycare, the wall. The wall have I
Speaker 2: told you about?
Speaker 1: I known about the wall.
Speaker 2: There's a little wall. It's like shinheight right too, shin Sorry,
Speaker 2: it's run through about ten meters right. And the girls,
Speaker 2: for whatever reason, when we walked to the car, we
Speaker 2: walked past the wall and they both love to walk
Speaker 2: the length of the wall. And I always hold the
Speaker 2: hand because it's an adventure too, like that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, kids are adventurous.
Speaker 2: Yeah. And then one time Laula was like, don't fucking
Speaker 2: touch me, and I was like, you gotta be careful.
Speaker 2: She's a renegade and she's on that she'll probably do
Speaker 2: it by herself. But a lot of the time I
Speaker 2: think she's quite drunk, and I was like, Daddy's going
Speaker 2: to hold your hand, and she's.
Speaker 1: Like, don't get away from me, like a drunk person.
Speaker 2: I'm doing this by myself. And I was like, do
Speaker 2: you know what, fine, do it by yourself. No, She'll
Speaker 2: four steps and took a tumble and it was undergrass.
Speaker 2: He like told you another parent kind of looked at
Speaker 2: me and actually like hit the deck.
Speaker 1: I was like, well, what did you get.
Speaker 2: She's like a parent looked at me as if I
Speaker 2: was just as shittest dad ever.
Speaker 1: No, that's that's genius, teacher Molesson.
Speaker 2: She hasn't walked that wall solo. I wanted to since then.
Speaker 1: So so you think it works, Yeah, I think it works.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Like I've got a boy and he is likes to
Speaker 1: jump off things and all sorts of stuff, and like
Speaker 1: I'm very much like it's the same thing as long
Speaker 1: as it's not completely dangerous. Like I used to hang
Speaker 1: him upside down all the time, like we would be
Speaker 1: like playing and hanging upside down and.
Speaker 2: Like Michael Jackson out like a balcony window or something.
Speaker 1: Yeah, just at the back of the window of if
Speaker 1: I story bulding. It was nothing. It was really fun.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I'm like that's fine because I've I've got
Speaker 1: control of the situation. But I remember when I was
Speaker 1: doing it, my father in law, Frank, who's quite a
Speaker 1: cautious guy, nothing wrong with that. I just winked a Matt,
Speaker 1: but he was like he would be like, and I
Speaker 1: was like, well, I'm doing it safely. But like if
Speaker 1: I'm doing if Oscar's doing something it's like real dangerous
Speaker 1: and it's like there is no way of doing that safely.
Speaker 3: I'll be like, oh, wait down, you know, but they
Speaker 3: kind of need to figure it out, and say, they
Speaker 3: need to figure it out.
Speaker 1: If if you can't let your kids walk up and
Speaker 1: down the stairs, it's you know, a bit shaky, and
Speaker 1: how they're ever going to know? Like I find that
Speaker 1: like as well. When Oscar does something dangerous and does
Speaker 1: hurt himself, what helps is the relatability. It was like,
Speaker 1: do you know what I did that too? I did
Speaker 1: it when I was a kid. I did that too.
Speaker 1: I was riding my bike and ran straight into a tree.
Speaker 1: I did that too. Sometimes got to do it. Sometimes
Speaker 1: you got to do it to feel how it hurts.
Speaker 1: So I think like, yeah, but I think if it's
Speaker 1: life threatening. I think you're right, That's what I was
Speaker 1: getting at.
Speaker 2: Hey, before we go, Yes, we do have to clear
Speaker 2: something up. Ye And I thought naming our book two
Speaker 2: Doting Dads as like the headline title smart very smart.
Speaker 2: People know us and know the podcast. If they don't,
Speaker 2: maybe they want to get to know us. I now
Speaker 2: realized that was a huge mistake.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't say mistake. I feel like we've hit a
Speaker 1: new audience, separate audience.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: I mean, are we frauds, No, and we never ever once.
Speaker 2: But we're not correcting people.
Speaker 1: Well, I don't want to find anyone by saying no, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: no no no. That could be worse.
Speaker 2: Well, okay, I guess the best way to put it
Speaker 2: is we're swimming with the tide, and the tide is
Speaker 2: pulling us into a certain direction.
Speaker 1: Yeap. Just to give you guys some context, we did
Speaker 1: release a book. I don't know, have to hear of it.
Speaker 2: The question for one bucks on Amazon right now?
Speaker 1: Sorry?
Speaker 2: Continue.
Speaker 1: We went and did a book signing mix in the city,
Speaker 1: Mix in the city, which was lovely. We met some
Speaker 1: really nice people.
Speaker 2: A few fans love that, thank you for coming.
Speaker 1: We did meet someone who didn't know us.
Speaker 2: She was a lot older. She was very much a boomer.
Speaker 1: She was very boomer.
Speaker 2: She was a little bit cautious. She was kind of
Speaker 2: looking at the table where we were sitting where the
Speaker 2: book was on display, kind.
Speaker 1: Of like, what's this about? Yeah, not quite sure.
Speaker 2: She was young.
Speaker 1: And then she came over and she started asking about
Speaker 1: what age group the book is for.
Speaker 4: Generous sort of question, said, kids, kids are three and five.
Speaker 1: She's like, oh great, She's like, what did she say?
Speaker 2: She said, and then she goes and then she kind
Speaker 2: of after a little while, she kind of then turned
Speaker 2: a corner and was nodding and was like, do you
Speaker 2: know what. I think what you're doing is fantastic. And
Speaker 2: I thought, yeah, look, you know, it's not every day
Speaker 2: you get to publish a book, and we're happy. It's
Speaker 2: great to have it out there.
Speaker 1: She goes, no, no, no, no, no, no, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I think, he goes, are brave.
Speaker 2: And she was like, it's I was like, she's a
Speaker 2: kid's book.
Speaker 1: Yeah, rape, thanks.
Speaker 2: I guess, and she's like, it's this is lovely. It's
Speaker 2: a sign of the times.
Speaker 1: And she was also like, my my kids are also
Speaker 1: in same sex relationships with kids, so what and we
Speaker 1: were like, oh, that's lovely. Like we didould be like,
Speaker 1: Kama kind of looks like we're holding hand. It's a
Speaker 1: little bit and we were like, Matt and I were like,
Speaker 1: hmm okay. And then do you.
Speaker 2: Know what I said? I said. She goes, yeah, my
Speaker 2: my my nephew is in the same sex relationship and
Speaker 2: they're raising a boy and it's great. And I said, yeah,
Speaker 2: it's a heterosexual you need to watch out for, don't
Speaker 2: I there.
Speaker 1: And then after she she bought a book, which is great,
Speaker 1: so worth it. She toddled off and another lady came
Speaker 1: over and she was like, oh, I'm a single mom.
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh cool, and she was like yeah, my
Speaker 1: kids are pretty much raised by the gays as well,
Speaker 1: and you were like, what a great community. And then
Speaker 1: after that interaction, we'll like hing on a second to
Speaker 1: shoot doting dads.
Speaker 2: Not there's anything wrong with that at all at all,
Speaker 2: but you know, we're not correcting people.
Speaker 1: But also we're confused anyway, books Hours through the Roof
Speaker 1: have been better.
Speaker 2: If you've enjoyed this episode or any episode that we've
Speaker 2: released eighty eight up until now, Ash eighty nine. Can
Speaker 2: you bloody believe it? What will we do for one hundred?
Speaker 2: Who knows? Time will tell. If you enjoyed this episode,
Speaker 2: send it to anyone, anyone out there you think will
Speaker 2: benefit from two loving gay dads, and give us a review.
Speaker 2: Subscribe five stars, any little nugget. There's a few nuggets
Speaker 2: that we've been given. One was a pet parent fifty fish.
Speaker 2: He says, thank you, fifty fish.
Speaker 1: Correct, get a lie God, and we'll see you guys
Speaker 1: next week. Thanks very much, see you guys, Bye, fifty Fish.
Speaker 2: Two. Doting Dance Podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country
Speaker 2: throughout Australia and the connections to land, sea and community.
Speaker 1: We pay our respects to their elders past and present
Speaker 1: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestrate Islander
Speaker 1: peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land