WEBVTT - Do Women Smile More Than Men? 🙂🙃 0:00:00.760 --> 0:00:03.279 The Flex and Rooms Daily podcast brought. 0:00:03.200 --> 0:00:06.480 You ay yeah yeai. 0:00:07.040 --> 0:00:08.440 You know I said to you a couple of weeks 0:00:08.440 --> 0:00:10.479 ago through me that I'm trying to do big thoughts 0:00:10.560 --> 0:00:11.119 all the time. 0:00:11.240 --> 0:00:12.280 I just don't have. 0:00:12.760 --> 0:00:14.960 Stop trying to not be yourself with Kai Hung. 0:00:15.160 --> 0:00:18.599 Yeah, but it's I'm very exhausted. For the first time 0:00:18.680 --> 0:00:22.760 in my life, I'm exhausting myself by just existing. 0:00:22.800 --> 0:00:24.080 That's never happened to me before. 0:00:24.680 --> 0:00:27.960 And it's because it's because these things that I used 0:00:27.960 --> 0:00:32.199 to do just incidentally by virtue of being myself have 0:00:32.280 --> 0:00:36.040 become core tenets that are upheld by everyone who interacts 0:00:36.040 --> 0:00:37.919 with me. I set a standard that I don't want 0:00:37.960 --> 0:00:41.120 to upkeep. How fuck do you think I feel about Shrek? 0:00:42.640 --> 0:00:45.199 I have not. I have not watched that movie. 0:00:45.000 --> 0:00:48.480 The whole way through ever in my life. I don't 0:00:48.560 --> 0:00:50.120 give a fuck about Shrek. 0:00:50.400 --> 0:00:51.599 And now it's a whole thing. 0:00:51.760 --> 0:00:54.600 Literally, people say to be Shrek me every day. My 0:00:54.640 --> 0:00:56.160 inbox is flooded, guys. 0:00:56.360 --> 0:01:00.000 Honestly, it's the paradox of like claiming an identity because 0:01:00.160 --> 0:01:03.320 all these like you know, like I said, incidental markers 0:01:03.320 --> 0:01:07.320 of you become so tiring to uphold like that one 0:01:07.319 --> 0:01:08.760 week in October, I was like, I'm gonna be a 0:01:08.760 --> 0:01:09.679 passive princess. 0:01:10.160 --> 0:01:14.399 Granted didn't work out because that's not me. But sometimes 0:01:14.400 --> 0:01:17.200 it's hard being a big bitch. You know, it's hard 0:01:17.200 --> 0:01:17.800 being a bit bitch. 0:01:18.240 --> 0:01:20.640 But look, all I'm gonna say is I'm wearing a 0:01:20.640 --> 0:01:23.240 top that's backwards and the little tag is scratching my 0:01:23.319 --> 0:01:26.679 neck and I actually want to punch something. I've never 0:01:26.720 --> 0:01:29.039 punched in the knees, something before I've punched a hole 0:01:29.080 --> 0:01:29.440 in the wool. 0:01:30.400 --> 0:01:31.720 I told you I was angry little fuck. 0:01:31.840 --> 0:01:32.040 See. 0:01:32.040 --> 0:01:33.760 But I think my issue is I don't know how 0:01:33.840 --> 0:01:35.959 to instinctively hold my thumbs. My nails are too long, 0:01:35.959 --> 0:01:38.080 and even if they weren't, I just don't know. If 0:01:38.120 --> 0:01:40.319 I'm an upper body strength kind of girl. I think 0:01:40.319 --> 0:01:43.120 I could choke someone out with my thighs because I 0:01:43.200 --> 0:01:46.120 really can lift heavy with my thighs, but with my arms, 0:01:46.160 --> 0:01:48.640 like I do a six kilo grand bicep curl. I'm like, 0:01:48.800 --> 0:01:50.160 this is hard. 0:01:50.480 --> 0:01:53.480 Really, I got better upper body strength and lower body 0:01:53.520 --> 0:01:55.600 strengths because my torso is longer than my than my 0:01:55.640 --> 0:01:56.160 short legs. 0:01:56.200 --> 0:01:59.160 Oh I'm a long leggo. Oh really yeah? Okay, my 0:01:59.360 --> 0:01:59.960 Barbie queen. 0:02:00.280 --> 0:02:05.080 Literally, hmmm, the tangents really get us. 0:02:05.520 --> 0:02:07.120 Let's beware. Brook. 0:02:07.160 --> 0:02:10.560 Our producer is literally like her eyebrows are like high. 0:02:12.880 --> 0:02:13.600 She's like nodding. 0:02:14.360 --> 0:02:16.360 Yeah, yeah, girls, we're gonna wrap it up. 0:02:16.440 --> 0:02:18.320 I go to the vending machine and get a math. 0:02:18.120 --> 0:02:21.920 Bar stat literally flex and frooms. 0:02:22.160 --> 0:02:23.960 So I have a fact few flexi, and that is 0:02:24.000 --> 0:02:28.359 that babies, our target audience, smile on average two hundred 0:02:28.400 --> 0:02:29.000 times a day. 0:02:29.240 --> 0:02:29.919 Are you sure? 0:02:30.480 --> 0:02:33.440 Yeah, even when they're farting in a little smile. 0:02:33.680 --> 0:02:33.920 Yeah. 0:02:34.000 --> 0:02:36.440 Maybe we're just reading it. Maybe we're like, they're smiling, 0:02:36.520 --> 0:02:37.079 but they're just. 0:02:37.040 --> 0:02:40.520 Like gesturing and noting, and we're adding the meaning. 0:02:41.240 --> 0:02:44.080 And then apparently the average woman smiles sixty two times 0:02:44.120 --> 0:02:44.400 a day. 0:02:44.880 --> 0:02:45.360 I see that. 0:02:45.720 --> 0:02:47.960 I don't feel like enough. We'll guess how many times 0:02:48.000 --> 0:02:53.840 the average man smiles sixty eight eight times a day? 0:02:54.080 --> 0:02:55.320 Your average man. 0:02:55.560 --> 0:02:59.840 Smile, love, complimenting, make because it lands right. 0:03:00.240 --> 0:03:06.440 That eight eight times a day. Baby's away. I see 0:03:06.480 --> 0:03:08.240 it because then I started thinking, I thought, surely that 0:03:08.280 --> 0:03:10.639 can't be right. And then I'm going through the rolodex 0:03:10.680 --> 0:03:13.720 of men that I know. Josh in the studio smiles 0:03:13.800 --> 0:03:15.240 quite a bit, as does Will. 0:03:15.520 --> 0:03:16.440 Very friendly men. 0:03:16.440 --> 0:03:18.679 Yeah, trying to think of like think of my dad 0:03:18.720 --> 0:03:21.959 for example. Okay, jokes all the time, but he's not smiling. 0:03:22.040 --> 0:03:24.400 So we have a man in the room who does 0:03:24.440 --> 0:03:27.480 not feel like these statistics are accurate. He would say 0:03:27.520 --> 0:03:29.640 that men or at least he smiles more often than 0:03:29.680 --> 0:03:32.280 eight times. But I think we've got to be paying 0:03:32.280 --> 0:03:32.880 more attention. 0:03:33.520 --> 0:03:36.200 I don't know. I guess yeah, Like think about it. 0:03:36.240 --> 0:03:39.520 We're in the space, we're trying to be interesting or engaging. 0:03:39.560 --> 0:03:41.880 So I think it's your want to do is to smile, 0:03:42.040 --> 0:03:42.560 whereas if. 0:03:42.480 --> 0:03:44.000 You're smiling having a bit of a cackle. 0:03:44.120 --> 0:03:45.640 Yeah, but what if you're like doing a job, you're 0:03:45.720 --> 0:03:47.760 alone most of the time, what have you got to 0:03:47.800 --> 0:03:50.000 smile at? You don't have connection like. 0:03:50.120 --> 0:03:52.040 We really are. What have you got to smile at? 0:03:53.440 --> 0:03:55.000 The beauty of life? Probably not, do you know. 0:03:55.040 --> 0:03:57.000 I was watching a video the other day and it 0:03:57.120 --> 0:04:03.000 was talking about how how men subconsciously know when they 0:04:03.040 --> 0:04:07.280 stand in front of another man it is a defensive 0:04:07.520 --> 0:04:10.880 or offensive position, and so if you watch men communicate, 0:04:10.920 --> 0:04:14.720 they'll stand in forty five degree angles in relation to 0:04:14.760 --> 0:04:15.200 each other. 0:04:15.760 --> 0:04:17.520 I was like, what, so. 0:04:17.480 --> 0:04:19.560 Now I'm start looking around, I'm like, well, you got 0:04:19.560 --> 0:04:22.080 you don't do the front to front. Apparently it's too aggressive. 0:04:22.160 --> 0:04:24.720 That's so interesting. We've got to be paying more attention now, 0:04:24.720 --> 0:04:27.360 I'm trying to think. Yeah, men like standing cyber. 0:04:27.680 --> 0:04:29.400 Kind of like look at each other from the left 0:04:29.400 --> 0:04:30.880 and the right, not from the front. 0:04:32.800 --> 0:04:35.760 It's is a lot, that is so true. Yeah, we're 0:04:35.760 --> 0:04:36.799 got to be paying more attention. 0:04:37.040 --> 0:04:39.560 Oh my god, if you're a man listening, hit us up. 0:04:39.720 --> 0:04:42.920 Let us know what else we are coming so much 0:04:42.960 --> 0:04:47.200 about this unknown specie flex and fruits. Now. The other 0:04:47.240 --> 0:04:49.880 day we posted an Instagram real I must say to 0:04:49.960 --> 0:04:52.680 tutor own Horn. The posts have been posting, oh we 0:04:52.720 --> 0:04:54.760 love that. The engagement is all the way up my 0:04:54.880 --> 0:04:59.480 professional dashboard on Instagram popping poppin' p opp iron g 0:05:00.080 --> 0:05:01.920 All right, so we did one about whether or not 0:05:01.960 --> 0:05:04.640 you brush your teeth at the at the sink or 0:05:04.680 --> 0:05:08.040 in the shower. Yes, the comments were very divisive, as 0:05:08.040 --> 0:05:12.160 we know. However, the newest comment is from somebody called 0:05:12.720 --> 0:05:16.159 tiger Thorn, and it reads, I was told by a 0:05:16.200 --> 0:05:17.360 plumber family member. 0:05:17.640 --> 0:05:21.240 Okay, so not even a dentist, not even a dentist. 0:05:22.240 --> 0:05:24.840 I was told by a plumber family member. We all 0:05:24.880 --> 0:05:29.360 have one mine's David Price. He's master plumbing in Melbourne's family. 0:05:29.600 --> 0:05:31.760 Huh is that family? Yes? My cousin. 0:05:32.200 --> 0:05:34.720 Okay, he's looks he looks like me, but a boy 0:05:35.640 --> 0:05:42.280 like flu. Why are we going somebody this week? I'm struggling. 0:05:42.360 --> 0:05:45.119 The brain is the brain is buffering. I was told 0:05:45.120 --> 0:05:47.680 by a plumber family member that brushing teeth in the 0:05:47.720 --> 0:05:51.200 shower is kind of dangerous because shower heads gather all 0:05:51.279 --> 0:05:56.080 kinds of bacteria and can transmit Leisionnaire's disease when the 0:05:56.080 --> 0:05:56.880 water is ingestice? 0:05:56.960 --> 0:06:00.640 Is my don't all taps do that? Who clean the 0:06:00.680 --> 0:06:05.800 inside of their tap? Ever? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, this is 0:06:05.839 --> 0:06:07.039 what I want to find out as well. 0:06:07.520 --> 0:06:09.640 The water that comes out of the bathroom tap, is 0:06:09.680 --> 0:06:11.160 it the same as the water that comes out of 0:06:11.200 --> 0:06:12.000 the kitchen tank? 0:06:12.240 --> 0:06:13.679 Yeah, because when i'm. 0:06:13.480 --> 0:06:15.599 The difference is like there's a hot water pipe and 0:06:15.640 --> 0:06:18.240 a cold water pipe and they are the same pipe, and. 0:06:18.160 --> 0:06:19.760 Then they're splitting on and they split off. 0:06:20.200 --> 0:06:22.000 But maybe there's a filter in the kitchen tap as 0:06:22.040 --> 0:06:23.120 opposed to the bathroom tap. 0:06:23.120 --> 0:06:23.960 And now why would they do that? 0:06:24.200 --> 0:06:26.520 I can't fill up my water bottle in the toilet tap? 0:06:26.839 --> 0:06:29.560 Not why because it's got pooh water in it. Okay, 0:06:29.680 --> 0:06:34.920 the system, and that's fair the system to do it either, 0:06:35.000 --> 0:06:38.080 he's a little too close to the washing basket. 0:06:39.279 --> 0:06:40.479 Listen, I'm not even making sense. 0:06:40.520 --> 0:06:42.560 All I want to say is, is kitchen tap the 0:06:42.560 --> 0:06:45.320 same as bathroom tap? And his bathroom tap the same 0:06:45.440 --> 0:06:47.919 as laundry tap is the same as shower tap. I 0:06:47.960 --> 0:06:50.040 guess you know it's not looking good. 0:06:50.040 --> 0:06:50.240 Brother. 0:06:50.440 --> 0:06:52.920 There's already too much to be afraid of. You know 0:06:53.360 --> 0:06:56.000 you're saying, don't brush your teeth in the shower. You 0:06:56.000 --> 0:06:58.400 can get lesionaires. Stop going to restaurants. 0:06:58.480 --> 0:07:02.960 You know what. I had a restaurant the other day. 0:07:03.320 --> 0:07:06.240 Tell me why there was a girl behind the. 0:07:06.200 --> 0:07:06.880 Kills she. 0:07:08.480 --> 0:07:08.680 Went. 0:07:11.280 --> 0:07:12.600 She didn't even look ashamed. 0:07:13.800 --> 0:07:15.960 She did she do this? 0:07:17.280 --> 0:07:18.840 I don't care what she did. 0:07:19.640 --> 0:07:23.200 The noise itself was enough to propel any disease anywhere. 0:07:23.400 --> 0:07:26.560 She put it back into its Literally, I said, at 0:07:26.640 --> 0:07:28.320 least pretend to be ashamed. 0:07:29.840 --> 0:07:32.720 There was no mad dash for the hands, but nothing. 0:07:34.040 --> 0:07:36.440 So you know, the real. 0:07:36.360 --> 0:07:39.560 Dangers are outside of your home. What is a legionnaire's disease? 0:07:40.120 --> 0:07:41.760 Because you got the lesionnaire's cap. 0:07:41.840 --> 0:07:46.280 I think it's lesionaires is like lesions or is legionaires 0:07:46.360 --> 0:07:47.000 g or s. 0:07:47.120 --> 0:07:48.840 I don't know if this woman can be like Legion 0:07:49.000 --> 0:07:50.200 or Lesion Lision. 0:07:52.120 --> 0:07:53.720 All I'm gonna say is I'm still gonna brush my 0:07:53.760 --> 0:07:55.680 teeth in the shower, and maybe I'm gonna get some 0:07:55.680 --> 0:07:58.000 sort of disease. But what is life if not living 0:07:58.000 --> 0:07:58.600 life on the edge? 0:07:58.640 --> 0:07:58.920 Hunh. 0:07:59.000 --> 0:08:01.280 Literally, something's gonna take you out. If not that, what 0:08:01.440 --> 0:08:03.600 is bacteria? 0:08:04.120 --> 0:08:05.520 Do you know what? This isn't even a hill. 0:08:05.600 --> 0:08:09.280 I'm a dion Because to be fair, if anyone was 0:08:09.280 --> 0:08:11.800 gonna start brushing their teeth in the sink, it would 0:08:11.800 --> 0:08:12.000 be me. 0:08:12.080 --> 0:08:14.920 I've got two sinks. I can afford to. 0:08:14.880 --> 0:08:18.360 Do that, you know, but I won't because in the 0:08:18.400 --> 0:08:20.000 shower is what the height. 0:08:19.760 --> 0:08:21.960 Of luxury above. You got to see my taps at home. 0:08:22.000 --> 0:08:24.640 I've moved into a new place. They're the taps that 0:08:24.680 --> 0:08:28.160 have two different Yeah. Oh broh, Yeah, we're living in 0:08:28.200 --> 0:08:28.640 the past. 0:08:29.760 --> 0:08:32.959 The water. You know what I'm saying. I turned the 0:08:33.000 --> 0:08:33.280 tap on. 0:08:33.360 --> 0:08:38.160 The literally I have to go, and then if I go, 0:08:39.360 --> 0:08:41.200 if I got a little bit too much, it's too much, 0:08:42.040 --> 0:08:42.680 it's bang. 0:08:44.360 --> 0:08:45.240 And that's what you get. 0:08:45.360 --> 0:08:48.120 Wanting to live in houses with character dead that dead 0:08:48.160 --> 0:08:51.720 that you need one of those carbon copy from the plant, 0:08:52.920 --> 0:08:55.880 the same marble. Every house is a duplicate. Don't take 0:08:55.920 --> 0:08:59.840 any chances. It's not saying across. It's too much anyway. 0:08:59.840 --> 0:09:02.400 And off of that, how many more days will we 0:09:02.440 --> 0:09:03.840 be talking about toothbrushing? 0:09:04.200 --> 0:09:04.720 Are we done? 0:09:04.960 --> 0:09:05.160 Yeah? 0:09:05.160 --> 0:09:07.559 I'm done. I think I'm done too. I've done it 0:09:07.920 --> 0:09:08.920 and it's no shade. 0:09:08.920 --> 0:09:10.719 I understand. Once we have the conversation. You want to 0:09:10.720 --> 0:09:13.040 have the conversation, but it's done. It's dead unless the 0:09:13.080 --> 0:09:16.440 story is fresh. Leave it personally. If I can make 0:09:16.480 --> 0:09:18.120 a request, I want to hear from people who share 0:09:18.160 --> 0:09:19.520 toothbrushes but their significant other. 0:09:19.840 --> 0:09:21.839 Bring me that. Oh, I've already done that. If you 0:09:21.840 --> 0:09:23.560 know I want it. I want people to come in. 0:09:23.679 --> 0:09:27.080 If you share a toothbrush, Willy nearly casually with Glee, 0:09:27.520 --> 0:09:29.880 with your partner, best friend, family, mother, talk to me. 0:09:29.960 --> 0:09:30.440 I want to know. 0:09:30.760 --> 0:09:34.000 This is flex and Frooms on CADA today. 0:09:34.000 --> 0:09:35.840 I'm flex and frooms. We're going to figure out how 0:09:36.080 --> 0:09:37.640 not to take things personally. 0:09:37.880 --> 0:09:38.400 I need this. 0:09:38.920 --> 0:09:43.600 I feel like everything is personal, and when I pretend 0:09:43.640 --> 0:09:47.120 they're not, I'm doing myself a disservice. Okay, all things 0:09:47.160 --> 0:09:49.800 good or bad, like you know, how some people don't 0:09:50.000 --> 0:09:52.480 take compliments. They feel like people are being facetious, they're 0:09:52.520 --> 0:09:54.640 just trying to fill gaps in conversation. I take them 0:09:54.679 --> 0:09:56.880 really personally. You must be right, of course, I look amazing. 0:09:56.920 --> 0:09:57.559 Why would you like? 0:09:57.760 --> 0:09:59.920 Right? Pretty princess? Pretty princess? 0:10:00.320 --> 0:10:00.560 Right? 0:10:00.720 --> 0:10:04.120 Or on the adverse, if someone is giving me feedback 0:10:04.200 --> 0:10:05.480 or critique, who. 0:10:05.320 --> 0:10:06.280 Am I to not be like? 0:10:06.600 --> 0:10:10.120 Okay, they know they're hitting a spot anyway, we might 0:10:10.120 --> 0:10:11.000 work on it, we might not. 0:10:11.120 --> 0:10:11.559 I don't know. 0:10:12.840 --> 0:10:17.079 Interdependentness into connectedness. 0:10:17.360 --> 0:10:19.440 I'm not sure you're alone on that one. Hunt. I'm 0:10:19.440 --> 0:10:22.120 not sure anyway. Listen to this video. You know what 0:10:22.200 --> 0:10:22.680 I do. 0:10:22.600 --> 0:10:25.880 When I I'm teaching myself to not take things personally. 0:10:26.120 --> 0:10:30.000 Every time someone does something annoying, I just think it's 0:10:30.080 --> 0:10:32.959 because they're dumb or lazy, or a combination of both. 0:10:33.200 --> 0:10:35.400 Every Time someone asks me to do something I don't 0:10:35.400 --> 0:10:37.840 want to do, I just say I'm sorry, I'm not 0:10:37.880 --> 0:10:40.839 smart enough to do this. Sorry, I'm just lazy. I 0:10:40.880 --> 0:10:45.160 don't want to do it because in those states, nothing 0:10:45.280 --> 0:10:49.360 can really compel someone, and that is just what life is. 0:10:49.440 --> 0:10:51.560 You know, you get older and you realize that you 0:10:51.600 --> 0:10:54.960 can't really control anyone you can only influence them, and 0:10:55.040 --> 0:10:57.560 the extent to wish you cannot. Can't influence someone just 0:10:57.640 --> 0:10:59.920 isn't up to you at a certain point, either they 0:11:00.080 --> 0:11:02.360 going to do it or they're not. Stop wasting your 0:11:02.480 --> 0:11:05.520 energy and focus on the things that you actually like 0:11:05.760 --> 0:11:08.079 that are going well, that you want to go well, 0:11:08.360 --> 0:11:11.160 that don't involve you needing to wait for another person 0:11:11.800 --> 0:11:14.400 to do something to give yourself permission to do what 0:11:14.440 --> 0:11:17.520 you want to do. They're either dumb or they're lazy, 0:11:17.640 --> 0:11:20.320 or a combination of both. You are dumb and lazy 0:11:20.360 --> 0:11:22.840 in your own way too, and the ways that you 0:11:22.880 --> 0:11:23.920 guys are dumb and lazy. 0:11:24.679 --> 0:11:26.720 It's just not compatible. And that's okay. 0:11:26.840 --> 0:11:30.119 That is my friend Amber a killer and from Australian, 0:11:30.600 --> 0:11:34.439 because you know what, I like that my friends are thinkers, 0:11:34.720 --> 0:11:38.520 because I don't necessarily agree. I don't whole hardly disagree either. 0:11:38.600 --> 0:11:40.720 I think she's making a really good point and I 0:11:40.880 --> 0:11:43.960 like that the language she's using is the great equalizer, 0:11:44.480 --> 0:11:47.800 just saying if you're dumb, you're lazy. It's boring and 0:11:47.920 --> 0:11:50.920 have the capacity. It's like the apathy of it all 0:11:51.360 --> 0:11:54.920 makes it all so much simpler to uncover. Question number one, 0:11:55.360 --> 0:11:55.920 how do not. 0:11:58.240 --> 0:11:58.920 How to talk. 0:11:59.200 --> 0:12:03.440 I'm struggling, hungry, how do not take things personally? Look, 0:12:03.559 --> 0:12:05.920 I see where Amber's coming from in the sense that 0:12:06.080 --> 0:12:10.160 if you view everyone and yourself as dumb and lazy, 0:12:10.760 --> 0:12:15.559 then you kind of diffuse the way something hits. So 0:12:16.240 --> 0:12:19.280 if somebody is being rude to you, well, they're dumb 0:12:19.280 --> 0:12:20.040 for not treating you. 0:12:20.120 --> 0:12:22.200 Well. What I do think is that. 0:12:23.000 --> 0:12:25.839 With Amber in particular, she walks through the world with 0:12:26.000 --> 0:12:29.880 very high level of self awareness. She is an everyday 0:12:29.880 --> 0:12:33.640 philosopher and every day thinker. That's what she does, and 0:12:33.679 --> 0:12:37.400 she does well, So I think she's able to in practice, 0:12:37.920 --> 0:12:39.439 have a lot of nuance with that. 0:12:39.800 --> 0:12:42.520 For the average person, I don't think it's gonna hit. 0:12:42.640 --> 0:12:45.120 It's like when you say, like everybody is special, and 0:12:45.160 --> 0:12:46.040 people run with that. 0:12:46.440 --> 0:12:49.360 Let's stop doing that, Settle Petal. 0:12:49.840 --> 0:12:51.560 At the start of the video, I thought she meant 0:12:52.120 --> 0:12:53.200 she thinks everyone else is. 0:12:53.240 --> 0:12:55.120 Dumb and lazy. Well, that's what she's like. 0:12:55.160 --> 0:12:58.520 Everybody you them, were all dumb and lazy. And so 0:12:59.080 --> 0:13:01.360 the way you stop her personalizing thing, because usually what 0:13:01.440 --> 0:13:05.000 happens when you take things personal, you're pedestalizing that person's 0:13:05.040 --> 0:13:07.800 point of view over what you think or in some 0:13:07.840 --> 0:13:10.760 ways you're saying that what they think in this moment, 0:13:10.800 --> 0:13:13.559 what they're saying is of more value and must be true. 0:13:13.760 --> 0:13:16.000 Therefore I have to sit with it. I have to 0:13:16.040 --> 0:13:19.520 hold it as my own. So if you neutralize everyone, 0:13:19.559 --> 0:13:23.079 and you say all the opinions are dumb, everybody's lazy, 0:13:23.400 --> 0:13:26.000 where all idiots, then it doesn't really matter where it's 0:13:26.040 --> 0:13:28.280 coming from, and what you choose to do with it 0:13:28.320 --> 0:13:29.400 is an active choice. 0:13:29.440 --> 0:13:32.679 You're in clown town. You're in clowntown, babe. I think 0:13:32.720 --> 0:13:33.280 I get it. 0:13:33.400 --> 0:13:35.640 I mean, but yeah, weret's a spice of life if 0:13:35.640 --> 0:13:39.040 you neutralize everything, like maybe I can take on other 0:13:39.040 --> 0:13:42.040 people's bad opinions of me, because then there's good ones 0:13:42.720 --> 0:13:44.520 like for example, we just got an email really quick, 0:13:44.679 --> 0:13:48.200 yeah not really quick, take your time, lavish in these words. 0:13:48.800 --> 0:13:52.319 It has been sent on by my manager. Oh my god, 0:13:54.000 --> 0:13:54.679 oh my god. 0:13:54.880 --> 0:13:59.120 Look how long this email is? FLEXI whoa? This is 0:13:59.160 --> 0:14:03.160 all praising WHOA. That's like eighth whoa like ten paragraphs. 0:14:03.200 --> 0:14:07.320 Okay, holy shit, let's just do the one that's about us. Firstly, 0:14:07.480 --> 0:14:08.679 thank you, thank you, thank you. 0:14:09.160 --> 0:14:09.920 I'm a long. 0:14:09.720 --> 0:14:13.520 Haul listener of flex and froomesh and have listened to 0:14:13.559 --> 0:14:16.520 every EP at least once, most twice, first half of 0:14:16.520 --> 0:14:17.520 them at least thrice. 0:14:17.920 --> 0:14:19.720 WHOA, what's going on? Sex? 0:14:20.360 --> 0:14:21.880 I moved to a new city five months ago, and 0:14:21.920 --> 0:14:24.160 I've been working and studying from home, finishing my master's 0:14:24.200 --> 0:14:24.920 in psychology. 0:14:25.080 --> 0:14:25.720 Do you mind? 0:14:26.160 --> 0:14:30.320 I'm so sorry, don't play on talk pouring out? 0:14:31.760 --> 0:14:32.520 It was an accident. 0:14:32.560 --> 0:14:34.840 It was already open, pouring out our heart and soul 0:14:35.920 --> 0:14:38.120 working home my masters in psychology, meaning that I was 0:14:38.120 --> 0:14:40.000 stuck at home studying most of the time. And I've 0:14:40.000 --> 0:14:42.440 been here so far. Your podcast keep me going and 0:14:42.480 --> 0:14:45.600 gave the company laughs and resonating ideas I've needed on 0:14:45.720 --> 0:14:51.240 more days than I can tell you. And then she said, Oh, 0:14:51.320 --> 0:14:53.480 I think this whole. I think this needs Oh my god, 0:14:53.480 --> 0:14:55.160 this is like an art clap back to one of 0:14:55.160 --> 0:14:58.720 the other listeners. Ooh about the member of the psychologist 0:14:58.720 --> 0:15:01.360 that wrote in saying about the w Well, Yes, let's 0:15:01.360 --> 0:15:04.000 do a zoom back to that Brook. I listened to 0:15:04.080 --> 0:15:07.320 Yours and Flexes episode from yesterday where you spoke about therapy. 0:15:07.720 --> 0:15:10.600 I'm a provisional psychologist, but also someone who's been in 0:15:10.680 --> 0:15:16.440 therapy for ten years. Classic psychologists vibes, so I have 0:15:16.520 --> 0:15:19.160 a fair bit of experience on both sides of LACOINNE. 0:15:19.440 --> 0:15:21.240 My hot take is that you don't need to go 0:15:21.280 --> 0:15:23.360 to therapy if you don't have goals or are a 0:15:23.440 --> 0:15:26.640 bit stagnant, you need a life coach or something like that. 0:15:27.200 --> 0:15:29.480 In UNI, I remember learning that the majority of our 0:15:29.520 --> 0:15:32.640 clients are what is referred to as the worried Well, Okay, 0:15:32.800 --> 0:15:34.600 nothing wrong with you, but you think you need to 0:15:34.640 --> 0:15:37.760 be in therapy. Therapy is for people with mental health 0:15:37.760 --> 0:15:41.520 issues in brackets anxiety, depression, personality disorders, phobias, etc. 0:15:41.760 --> 0:15:41.960 Etc. 0:15:42.360 --> 0:15:44.880 And it's to use a therapeutic tool to work through that. 0:15:44.960 --> 0:15:47.440 The worried well, just take up resources that are actually 0:15:47.440 --> 0:15:48.600 for people struggling. 0:15:49.680 --> 0:15:51.520 Okay, now we're booming out. Thanksbook for doing that. 0:15:51.680 --> 0:15:54.080 Secondly, your approach to mental health is awesome. And also 0:15:54.080 --> 0:15:58.400 she's bolded awesome, so effing cool. For legal reasons, I'm 0:15:58.440 --> 0:16:01.200 not writing as a provisional psychoic just about to be registered. 0:16:01.240 --> 0:16:04.160 But the listener who recently wrote in as a provincial 0:16:06.040 --> 0:16:10.400 the provisional psychologists biting each other. The listener who recently 0:16:10.400 --> 0:16:12.720 wrote in as a provisional psych who had done ten 0:16:12.760 --> 0:16:15.240 years of therapy shook me to my core. I have 0:16:15.280 --> 0:16:17.880 also been on both sides of the psychology seat like 0:16:17.920 --> 0:16:21.160 that listener, and their messaging disturbed me deeply. Frankly, it 0:16:21.360 --> 0:16:24.480 pissed me off back into the bolds. Your response was 0:16:24.520 --> 0:16:26.400 spot on. I know you probably know this, but I 0:16:26.400 --> 0:16:28.360 would never want to condescend. But I just want to 0:16:28.360 --> 0:16:31.280 balance out that voice and show my support for your perspective. Yes, 0:16:31.600 --> 0:16:34.360 people who are really seriously mentally ill need psychologists, but 0:16:34.480 --> 0:16:37.560 normalizing seeking psychological help is the first step that reduces 0:16:37.560 --> 0:16:40.200 the amount of people who would become seriously mentally ill. 0:16:40.840 --> 0:16:44.800 What's it called when you prevention over cure? Psychology masters 0:16:44.800 --> 0:16:47.040 are really competitive to get into. We need to find 0:16:47.080 --> 0:16:49.880 more positions in those masters programs, which is only made 0:16:49.920 --> 0:16:52.360 more likely by increasing the number of people who access 0:16:52.360 --> 0:16:55.520 and value psychology services. When it comes to Oussie seeking 0:16:55.560 --> 0:16:59.400 mental health care, again, bold more is more. We all 0:16:59.440 --> 0:17:02.840 know too many young men firsthand or by degree of separation, 0:17:03.200 --> 0:17:06.679 who are very privileged and functional from the outside perspective, 0:17:07.040 --> 0:17:11.720 and yet they self harm. This worried world concept makes 0:17:11.760 --> 0:17:15.120 me sick and contributes to those terrifying statistics around the 0:17:15.440 --> 0:17:19.560 yeat of young men. That's just one example, but the 0:17:19.560 --> 0:17:22.640 premise applies to everyone, as you said yourself, eating Oh 0:17:22.680 --> 0:17:27.040 my god, we're hitting every every category here. Eating disorders 0:17:27.080 --> 0:17:29.600 do have the highest fatality of any into illness. Stand 0:17:29.680 --> 0:17:34.840 up queens, and then finally, fuck the worried well. Everyone 0:17:34.920 --> 0:17:38.040 seeking help deserves to receive it. I even know too 0:17:38.040 --> 0:17:41.840 many people personally who have had textbook objectively awful traumatic 0:17:41.880 --> 0:17:45.720 experiences who think they don't deserve psychological treatment because of 0:17:45.800 --> 0:17:48.240 stigmatizing awful beliefs. Out of the amounts of people like 0:17:48.280 --> 0:17:53.000 that one listener, we were honestly, this is like that. 0:17:53.040 --> 0:17:55.320 She has put into words the words that I could 0:17:55.320 --> 0:17:57.320 not find. But you did put it into words. You 0:17:57.440 --> 0:17:59.480 articulated yourself. Thanks An, Well you did. 0:17:59.680 --> 0:17:59.880 Yeah. 0:18:00.000 --> 0:18:01.640