1 00:00:03,279 --> 00:00:06,440 Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families Podcast, the podcast for the type poor. 2 00:00:06,400 --> 00:00:09,080 Speaker 2: Parent who's just what answers Now. 3 00:00:09,520 --> 00:00:12,160 Speaker 1: I'm doctor Justin Coilson and I'm joined by Luken Susie, 4 00:00:12,240 --> 00:00:15,480 Speaker 1: husband and wife radio duo with three young boys. Myself, well, 5 00:00:15,560 --> 00:00:18,720 Speaker 1: my wife Kylie and I have six young daughters. Well, 6 00:00:18,760 --> 00:00:22,680 Speaker 1: actually the youngest is young. The oldest has been marriage. 7 00:00:22,680 --> 00:00:27,080 Speaker 1: She has just celebrated the first year anniversary. Can you 8 00:00:27,160 --> 00:00:30,560 Speaker 1: believe that? I can't believe that. I feel surprisingly young 9 00:00:30,640 --> 00:00:33,199 Speaker 1: for somebody who's got a daughter who's been married for 10 00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:36,920 Speaker 1: twelve months. Anyway, today, we just want our kids to 11 00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:40,240 Speaker 1: have amazing childhoods. I mean, that's what every parent dreams 12 00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:44,080 Speaker 1: of their children, looking back dreamily on all of those 13 00:00:44,200 --> 00:00:46,800 Speaker 1: wonderful experiences they had as families. But sometimes it feels 14 00:00:46,800 --> 00:00:49,280 Speaker 1: like we're never going to get there. If we want 15 00:00:49,280 --> 00:00:51,599 Speaker 1: them to have great childhoods, we want them to have 16 00:00:51,720 --> 00:00:55,600 Speaker 1: such special childhoods. How do we make that happen. We've 17 00:00:55,600 --> 00:00:58,160 Speaker 1: got a listener question that makes this a really great 18 00:00:58,200 --> 00:00:59,040 Speaker 1: conversation to have. 19 00:01:00,080 --> 00:01:02,960 Speaker 3: Melanie is the wisdom behind this question. I love it 20 00:01:03,040 --> 00:01:04,600 Speaker 3: so much and I'm going to be taking notes on 21 00:01:04,640 --> 00:01:07,200 Speaker 3: this one. She says, I feel like I'm failing at 22 00:01:07,240 --> 00:01:09,520 Speaker 3: creating good memories. 23 00:01:08,959 --> 00:01:09,760 Speaker 2: For my kids. 24 00:01:10,160 --> 00:01:13,040 Speaker 3: I see my friends doing amazing holidays and picnics, and 25 00:01:13,080 --> 00:01:15,319 Speaker 3: all I ever seem to do is just the basic 26 00:01:15,360 --> 00:01:17,880 Speaker 3: house work and getting the kids through their day. How 27 00:01:17,880 --> 00:01:21,039 Speaker 3: do I make sure my kids have happy memories of 28 00:01:21,080 --> 00:01:21,959 Speaker 3: their childhood? 29 00:01:22,400 --> 00:01:24,199 Speaker 1: Well, the first thing that I would say is stop 30 00:01:24,280 --> 00:01:28,920 Speaker 1: looking at everybody else. Teddy Roosevelt said comparison is the 31 00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:31,640 Speaker 1: thief of joy. And can I tell you there are 32 00:01:31,640 --> 00:01:36,039 Speaker 1: so many psychological studies that highlight the terrible undoing of 33 00:01:36,120 --> 00:01:40,600 Speaker 1: well being that comparison creates. So stop looking at everyone's 34 00:01:40,640 --> 00:01:43,040 Speaker 1: Instagram and Facebook. Just just give yourself a holiday from 35 00:01:43,080 --> 00:01:45,679 Speaker 1: it for a little while, because not only will you 36 00:01:45,760 --> 00:01:47,920 Speaker 1: stop comparing, but you'll also free up a whole lot 37 00:01:47,920 --> 00:01:49,760 Speaker 1: of time to make memories with your own children. 38 00:01:50,160 --> 00:01:54,560 Speaker 3: There's step one. So what actually makes good memories for 39 00:01:54,640 --> 00:01:57,000 Speaker 3: our kids? I think that's a really interesting thing to 40 00:01:57,040 --> 00:01:59,320 Speaker 3: look at here, because we can think it's the picnics 41 00:01:59,360 --> 00:02:02,920 Speaker 3: and the holidays and the amazing experiences. But I look 42 00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:05,200 Speaker 3: back and like, some of my favorite memories are just 43 00:02:05,240 --> 00:02:07,200 Speaker 3: sitting in front of the TV together as a family, 44 00:02:07,280 --> 00:02:09,960 Speaker 3: eating our meal and having funny conversations or dancing in 45 00:02:09,960 --> 00:02:12,240 Speaker 3: the lound room because Dad's put on his favorite record. 46 00:02:12,080 --> 00:02:14,600 Speaker 2: Or teasing my sister for her boyfriend when she was thirteen. 47 00:02:15,320 --> 00:02:16,440 Speaker 1: Yeah, what was her name? 48 00:02:16,919 --> 00:02:19,680 Speaker 2: My sister's name was Lana. Her boyfriend's name was Marsh. 49 00:02:19,800 --> 00:02:22,400 Speaker 2: We call him Marsh Mellow and his friend Columbine. 50 00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:26,760 Speaker 1: I all remember the jokes, Nana's got a boyfriend. I mean, 51 00:02:26,800 --> 00:02:30,760 Speaker 1: that's what you'd say, right, Or you'd say Lana and 52 00:02:30,840 --> 00:02:32,000 Speaker 1: Marsh sitting in the tree. 53 00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:32,280 Speaker 2: OK. 54 00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:39,040 Speaker 1: And isn't it funny that that's what makes memories? I 55 00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:41,120 Speaker 1: think that we want to now, if you've got the 56 00:02:41,160 --> 00:02:43,840 Speaker 1: capacity to, if you've got the capability and the resources 57 00:02:43,840 --> 00:02:46,280 Speaker 1: and the time to put on the special parties or 58 00:02:46,280 --> 00:02:49,200 Speaker 1: do the special picnics', that's wonderful. And there are some 59 00:02:49,240 --> 00:02:51,760 Speaker 1: parents who are able to do that, and I commend 60 00:02:51,800 --> 00:02:53,840 Speaker 1: you and more power to you. Every now and again, 61 00:02:53,880 --> 00:02:57,560 Speaker 1: my wife Kylie missus Happy Families. She'll invest a month 62 00:02:57,639 --> 00:03:01,079 Speaker 1: into putting on something amazing for the children and it's incredible. 63 00:03:01,120 --> 00:03:02,520 Speaker 1: We love it when we get to do that sort 64 00:03:02,520 --> 00:03:05,280 Speaker 1: of thing. But you can't do that every Saturday. You 65 00:03:05,320 --> 00:03:08,040 Speaker 1: can't do that on a you know, multiple times a 66 00:03:08,040 --> 00:03:10,880 Speaker 1: week sort of basis, the best way to find out 67 00:03:11,000 --> 00:03:14,680 Speaker 1: what the memories are that your children have, the best 68 00:03:14,720 --> 00:03:17,560 Speaker 1: memories that they can hang on to and grasp and 69 00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:20,680 Speaker 1: play with, is to ask them. So around the dinner table. 70 00:03:20,680 --> 00:03:23,080 Speaker 1: You know, I mean most families are familiar with the idea. 71 00:03:23,120 --> 00:03:25,520 Speaker 1: Now I've been talking about it for well over a decade. 72 00:03:25,800 --> 00:03:27,400 Speaker 1: At the end of the day, sit down, have your 73 00:03:27,440 --> 00:03:29,200 Speaker 1: evening meal, make sure all the screens are turned off, 74 00:03:29,240 --> 00:03:31,040 Speaker 1: and say, you know what we're grateful for today? Tell 75 00:03:31,080 --> 00:03:33,040 Speaker 1: me about the best thing that happened today. Those sorts 76 00:03:33,040 --> 00:03:35,920 Speaker 1: of let's reflect on the positive, let's savor and amplify 77 00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:39,400 Speaker 1: and magnify those positive moments of our days. Well, that's 78 00:03:39,400 --> 00:03:43,280 Speaker 1: all good and nice, and there's science that supports you know, 79 00:03:43,360 --> 00:03:45,000 Speaker 1: it's use. So it's a good thing to do. But 80 00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:47,280 Speaker 1: we got bored of it in our family, and so 81 00:03:47,320 --> 00:03:49,120 Speaker 1: we started to play with some other questions as well. 82 00:03:49,160 --> 00:03:52,080 Speaker 1: And just recently we had a conversation around our table 83 00:03:52,120 --> 00:03:56,520 Speaker 1: where we talked about our just our favorite memories. Another 84 00:03:56,520 --> 00:03:59,120 Speaker 1: one we talked about was our best injuries. Another one 85 00:03:59,120 --> 00:04:01,119 Speaker 1: we talked about was, oh, we talked about one where 86 00:04:01,120 --> 00:04:04,080 Speaker 1: we just played with our favorite food memories. You know 87 00:04:04,080 --> 00:04:06,200 Speaker 1: what were our favorite memories of food. And we keep 88 00:04:06,200 --> 00:04:08,080 Speaker 1: on coming up with all of these different topics to 89 00:04:08,120 --> 00:04:11,680 Speaker 1: do with memories and experiences, and when you start to 90 00:04:11,800 --> 00:04:15,160 Speaker 1: dive into it, you discover that just living life together 91 00:04:15,520 --> 00:04:18,640 Speaker 1: gives you memories. The point is you've got to live 92 00:04:18,720 --> 00:04:23,800 Speaker 1: life together, and then you've got to pause, ask the questions. Reflect. 93 00:04:24,080 --> 00:04:27,800 Speaker 1: There's actually a psychological phenomenon that Fred Bryant initially did 94 00:04:27,880 --> 00:04:32,240 Speaker 1: some science around called savoring, and savoring is the amplification 95 00:04:32,360 --> 00:04:35,000 Speaker 1: or magnification of a positive experience. We can save the 96 00:04:35,080 --> 00:04:38,240 Speaker 1: past experiences. We can save experiences right now when you 97 00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:40,840 Speaker 1: close your eyes and just be here. And you can 98 00:04:40,839 --> 00:04:43,080 Speaker 1: also savor the future before it even arrives. I can't 99 00:04:43,080 --> 00:04:44,720 Speaker 1: wait until the borders open up again and we can 100 00:04:44,760 --> 00:04:46,240 Speaker 1: go on that holiday that we were planning that we 101 00:04:46,240 --> 00:04:47,599 Speaker 1: paid for that we're never going to get the money 102 00:04:47,600 --> 00:04:50,039 Speaker 1: back for. You know, we can we can savor that 103 00:04:50,080 --> 00:04:53,000 Speaker 1: sort of stuff as well. So I would suggest that 104 00:04:53,240 --> 00:04:56,440 Speaker 1: Melanie sit down with the kids and say, let's savor 105 00:04:56,560 --> 00:04:59,559 Speaker 1: some of our favorite experiences. Let's talk about our best 106 00:04:59,560 --> 00:05:01,320 Speaker 1: times to together. What have they been, what are your 107 00:05:01,360 --> 00:05:04,120 Speaker 1: favorite memories of us? And she might find that the 108 00:05:04,160 --> 00:05:08,920 Speaker 1: picnics and the fancy holidays and the beautiful restaurants. None 109 00:05:08,920 --> 00:05:10,720 Speaker 1: of that even comes into it. It might be that night, 110 00:05:10,960 --> 00:05:13,520 Speaker 1: like you said, Susie, where Dad put on one of 111 00:05:13,560 --> 00:05:16,280 Speaker 1: his best eighties songs and dance with Mum in the 112 00:05:16,320 --> 00:05:18,360 Speaker 1: kitchen and then all the kids climbed onto Dad's back 113 00:05:18,400 --> 00:05:20,960 Speaker 1: and started wrestling and playing, and that might be their 114 00:05:21,040 --> 00:05:23,720 Speaker 1: number one memory. It's not hard to create those memories. 115 00:05:23,760 --> 00:05:25,680 Speaker 1: You just turn off the screens, turn on the music 116 00:05:25,720 --> 00:05:26,440 Speaker 1: and start playing. 117 00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:30,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, so can we explore the difference between quality and quantity, 118 00:05:30,279 --> 00:05:32,240 Speaker 2: like how many memories are enough memories? 119 00:05:33,640 --> 00:05:36,760 Speaker 1: Yeah? This is a really really interesting one. And I 120 00:05:36,800 --> 00:05:39,240 Speaker 1: don't know that I've got a strong opinion one way 121 00:05:39,320 --> 00:05:41,480 Speaker 1: or the other. I've heard some people say you can't 122 00:05:41,520 --> 00:05:44,360 Speaker 1: have quality time until you've got the quantity, because it's 123 00:05:44,480 --> 00:05:47,400 Speaker 1: during the quantity that you have the quality moments. There 124 00:05:47,400 --> 00:05:49,440 Speaker 1: are other people. I remember one time I was asked 125 00:05:49,480 --> 00:05:52,080 Speaker 1: to speak at one of Australia's biggest law firms. They 126 00:05:52,120 --> 00:05:53,880 Speaker 1: had me up on the thirty sixth floor of this 127 00:05:53,960 --> 00:05:56,320 Speaker 1: fancy building in Sydney, overlooking the Harbor Bridge in the 128 00:05:56,320 --> 00:05:58,400 Speaker 1: Opera House and looking out to North Head and it 129 00:05:58,440 --> 00:06:01,320 Speaker 1: was just exquisite. They put on this incredible lunch with 130 00:06:01,360 --> 00:06:04,920 Speaker 1: their in house chefs. But the brief for this conversation, 131 00:06:05,040 --> 00:06:07,719 Speaker 1: this conversation with I think it was about eighty lawyers 132 00:06:07,720 --> 00:06:11,000 Speaker 1: in this room. The brief was this, we found some 133 00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:15,120 Speaker 1: studies from the United Kingdom that suggests that you can 134 00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:19,040 Speaker 1: have a good relationship with your children on twelve minutes 135 00:06:19,360 --> 00:06:21,920 Speaker 1: a day. And I said, twelve minutes a day. That's 136 00:06:21,960 --> 00:06:24,599 Speaker 1: an interesting number. I said, tell me about twelve minutes. 137 00:06:24,640 --> 00:06:27,560 Speaker 1: What does that mean in legal speak? And they said, well, 138 00:06:27,560 --> 00:06:30,400 Speaker 1: that's two billable units. You know, we bill on six 139 00:06:30,440 --> 00:06:32,920 Speaker 1: minute increments. You get ten six minute increments per hour, 140 00:06:32,960 --> 00:06:35,280 Speaker 1: so we bill on six minute increments. So that's two 141 00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:37,800 Speaker 1: billable units. And you can have a good relationship with 142 00:06:37,839 --> 00:06:40,280 Speaker 1: your children on twelve minutes a day, on two billable 143 00:06:40,320 --> 00:06:42,520 Speaker 1: units a day. I said, this is fantastic. And so 144 00:06:42,560 --> 00:06:44,960 Speaker 1: the first slide that I put up was kids Spell 145 00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:49,360 Speaker 1: Love t IM because I don't think that it matters 146 00:06:49,360 --> 00:06:51,880 Speaker 1: whether it's quality time or quantity time. It's all time 147 00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:54,200 Speaker 1: to our kids, and if we're doing something with them, 148 00:06:54,240 --> 00:06:57,640 Speaker 1: it is quality time. But the more of the time 149 00:06:57,680 --> 00:07:00,000 Speaker 1: we have with them, the better it is. Over time, 150 00:07:00,080 --> 00:07:02,520 Speaker 1: are there diminishing returns. Yeah, you can probably spend four 151 00:07:02,520 --> 00:07:04,880 Speaker 1: hours and not have much more joy than you might 152 00:07:04,880 --> 00:07:07,280 Speaker 1: have had in thirty or forty minutes. But let's make 153 00:07:07,320 --> 00:07:09,120 Speaker 1: sure that we're getting the time full stop. 154 00:07:10,040 --> 00:07:13,080 Speaker 2: It's interesting because when I think about memories by themselves, 155 00:07:13,320 --> 00:07:16,760 Speaker 2: like there was one of my favorite memories of Dad 156 00:07:17,040 --> 00:07:18,560 Speaker 2: was when I was playing in or cricket and I 157 00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:20,000 Speaker 2: took a hat trick and he was there and he 158 00:07:20,080 --> 00:07:22,640 Speaker 2: was so proud of me and someone you know, and 159 00:07:22,840 --> 00:07:24,680 Speaker 2: the look on his face after I took this hat trick. 160 00:07:25,080 --> 00:07:27,080 Speaker 2: But that's not a happy memory for me. That was 161 00:07:27,120 --> 00:07:30,280 Speaker 2: actually a painful memory because it was inconsistent because I 162 00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:33,040 Speaker 2: never felt Dad was proud of me except for that moment. 163 00:07:33,240 --> 00:07:35,000 Speaker 2: And I talked to him about this when I was 164 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:36,840 Speaker 2: an adult that I just need to know that he 165 00:07:36,880 --> 00:07:38,920 Speaker 2: was proud of me because we're such different people. But 166 00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:41,040 Speaker 2: yet there's so much that I honor about him. So 167 00:07:41,200 --> 00:07:47,080 Speaker 2: having a happy memory isn't necessarily consistent with overall everything 168 00:07:47,160 --> 00:07:50,520 Speaker 2: being happy. Like to me, that moment, that one moment 169 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:53,040 Speaker 2: was happy, but it was because of every other moment 170 00:07:53,080 --> 00:07:54,760 Speaker 2: that I longed for something that wasn't there. 171 00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:58,360 Speaker 1: You know, there's some really good data, some a fascinating 172 00:07:58,480 --> 00:08:01,320 Speaker 1: couple of studies done maybe twenty or thirty years ago. 173 00:08:01,360 --> 00:08:06,000 Speaker 1: Now on this idea of mattering mattering, I think that 174 00:08:06,080 --> 00:08:08,440 Speaker 1: our children are going to find that they're going to 175 00:08:08,480 --> 00:08:11,880 Speaker 1: have the best memories with us when they felt like 176 00:08:12,120 --> 00:08:15,560 Speaker 1: they matted. When I think about the times that my 177 00:08:15,680 --> 00:08:18,120 Speaker 1: favorite experiences growing up in my family, there were the 178 00:08:18,120 --> 00:08:21,600 Speaker 1: times when my parents showed me that I matted. And 179 00:08:21,640 --> 00:08:24,240 Speaker 1: those were not necessarily expensive experiences. In fact, most of 180 00:08:24,240 --> 00:08:26,760 Speaker 1: the time they were really cheap. There's another series of 181 00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:28,920 Speaker 1: events as well that I would say were times where 182 00:08:28,960 --> 00:08:31,640 Speaker 1: I really have wonderful memories, and there were times where 183 00:08:31,680 --> 00:08:34,640 Speaker 1: my parents did things that mattered for other people, and 184 00:08:34,679 --> 00:08:37,880 Speaker 1: I saw them giving of themselves. I remember one night. 185 00:08:38,120 --> 00:08:40,760 Speaker 1: My dad used to drive a milk truck. He was 186 00:08:40,800 --> 00:08:43,360 Speaker 1: a milkman, and I was on the milk run with Dad. 187 00:08:43,400 --> 00:08:46,240 Speaker 1: One night, we were driving along a dirt road and 188 00:08:46,280 --> 00:08:48,000 Speaker 1: in the middle of the road as we drove, there 189 00:08:48,000 --> 00:08:51,200 Speaker 1: was this great, big lump. We stopped the milk truck, 190 00:08:51,320 --> 00:08:53,640 Speaker 1: got out, and Dad told me to stay in the car. 191 00:08:53,720 --> 00:08:55,719 Speaker 1: I think he knew what was going on. There was 192 00:08:55,760 --> 00:08:57,400 Speaker 1: a bloke that had fallen over in the middle of 193 00:08:57,440 --> 00:08:59,960 Speaker 1: the road, passed out unconscious. There was a nearby tab 194 00:09:00,520 --> 00:09:03,319 Speaker 1: and he'd had a few too many, stumbled onto this 195 00:09:03,360 --> 00:09:05,120 Speaker 1: dirt road, fallen over in the middle of it, and 196 00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:08,480 Speaker 1: passed out in the middle of the road. Dad picked 197 00:09:08,520 --> 00:09:12,280 Speaker 1: him up. He went through his pockets, found his wallet, 198 00:09:12,520 --> 00:09:14,440 Speaker 1: took the money out, put the bloke on the side 199 00:09:14,440 --> 00:09:15,760 Speaker 1: of the road, and said let's go. So no, he 200 00:09:15,800 --> 00:09:16,480 Speaker 1: didn't really, I'm. 201 00:09:16,400 --> 00:09:19,120 Speaker 2: Just kidding, Like, where's this story going. 202 00:09:20,400 --> 00:09:22,000 Speaker 1: He picked him up, and he lifted him into the 203 00:09:22,040 --> 00:09:23,679 Speaker 1: back of the truck. He pulled his wallet out and 204 00:09:23,679 --> 00:09:26,080 Speaker 1: found his address, and he drove him home, knocked on 205 00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:29,280 Speaker 1: the door and helped the lady. I guess the man's 206 00:09:29,320 --> 00:09:33,160 Speaker 1: wife get her husband into bed. And I reflect on 207 00:09:33,200 --> 00:09:35,480 Speaker 1: those experiences, and they are also some of the richest 208 00:09:35,480 --> 00:09:37,760 Speaker 1: and most wonderful memories that I have of my parents 209 00:09:37,760 --> 00:09:40,320 Speaker 1: as well, times where they did those exemplary things and 210 00:09:40,360 --> 00:09:43,679 Speaker 1: they showed their character. But I think, ultimately, if we 211 00:09:43,720 --> 00:09:46,120 Speaker 1: want to give our children great memories, we should make 212 00:09:46,120 --> 00:09:48,080 Speaker 1: sure that we're doing good for others, and we should 213 00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:50,319 Speaker 1: make sure that our children are having good experiences where 214 00:09:50,360 --> 00:09:51,200 Speaker 1: they matter with us. 215 00:09:52,720 --> 00:09:55,079 Speaker 2: I'd like to go back to the story I told 216 00:09:55,080 --> 00:09:58,120 Speaker 2: about my dad. I want everyone to understand that I 217 00:09:58,160 --> 00:09:59,880 Speaker 2: told a story of I guess something that I feel 218 00:09:59,920 --> 00:10:02,760 Speaker 2: like Dad maybe didn't quite get right with me, and 219 00:10:02,800 --> 00:10:04,720 Speaker 2: maybe as a kid, I didn't quite get right with him. 220 00:10:04,760 --> 00:10:07,520 Speaker 2: But overall, my dad did what you just talked about. 221 00:10:07,520 --> 00:10:10,200 Speaker 2: He taught me character, he taught me integrity, he taught 222 00:10:10,200 --> 00:10:14,040 Speaker 2: me hard work, he taught me about forgiveness. And you know, 223 00:10:14,080 --> 00:10:16,680 Speaker 2: it's four years ago he passed away, and I didn't. 224 00:10:16,960 --> 00:10:19,920 Speaker 2: I always thought I was nothing like him until I 225 00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:23,839 Speaker 2: reflected on some of these characters that he spoke about him, 226 00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:26,080 Speaker 2: and somebody else said, you know, you're just like your dad, 227 00:10:26,440 --> 00:10:29,959 Speaker 2: and I cherished that. While I didn't hear those words 228 00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:32,960 Speaker 2: like I wanted as a child, as I developed into 229 00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:35,720 Speaker 2: a human, he taught me so much, which is the 230 00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:38,839 Speaker 2: best parts of me. Didn't get everything right, but he 231 00:10:38,920 --> 00:10:39,680 Speaker 2: got plenty right. 232 00:10:40,320 --> 00:10:44,400 Speaker 1: Thanks so much for sharing that. Look, it's so important. Ultimately, 233 00:10:44,440 --> 00:10:46,640 Speaker 1: the memories that our children have of us are going 234 00:10:46,640 --> 00:10:49,680 Speaker 1: to be memories of time together and memories of our character. 235 00:10:50,080 --> 00:10:51,960 Speaker 1: And I think what you've done there is you've really 236 00:10:51,960 --> 00:10:55,520 Speaker 1: exemplified that. And that's what I think that Melanie might 237 00:10:55,880 --> 00:10:57,840 Speaker 1: find helpful in her family as well. 238 00:10:58,200 --> 00:11:01,559 Speaker 3: Beautiful, we appreciate you reading some wisdom and having a 239 00:11:01,679 --> 00:11:04,400 Speaker 3: good conversation about this idea of creating good memories with 240 00:11:04,440 --> 00:11:06,480 Speaker 3: our children. Doctor Justin Coulson, thanks for your time. 241 00:11:06,679 --> 00:11:09,560 Speaker 1: If you've enjoyed the podcast or found it helpful, would 242 00:11:09,559 --> 00:11:11,480 Speaker 1: you please do something for me? Can you go to 243 00:11:11,520 --> 00:11:14,120 Speaker 1: Apple Podcasts. If you go there, you can leave a 244 00:11:14,200 --> 00:11:17,880 Speaker 1: rating and a review. It's these reviews that you leave 245 00:11:18,280 --> 00:11:20,480 Speaker 1: that help people to find the podcast and therefore to 246 00:11:20,520 --> 00:11:24,320 Speaker 1: have happier families. I've got one from Chris S nine 247 00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:27,439 Speaker 1: ninety who said level headed Advice. I love listening to 248 00:11:27,600 --> 00:11:32,000 Speaker 1: Dr Justin Coulson's calm and level headed advice. Thank you 249 00:11:32,040 --> 00:11:34,640 Speaker 1: for all of you share with us well. Chris S 250 00:11:34,760 --> 00:11:36,720 Speaker 1: nine ninety, thank you so much for leaving that review 251 00:11:36,760 --> 00:11:39,400 Speaker 1: a five star review. I might add please do that. 252 00:11:39,679 --> 00:11:41,400 Speaker 1: It gives me such a little bars. I go whoa 253 00:11:41,559 --> 00:11:43,400 Speaker 1: every time I open up the podcast app and see 254 00:11:43,400 --> 00:11:45,400 Speaker 1: that somebody has been in there and saying what you 255 00:11:45,440 --> 00:11:48,360 Speaker 1: do makes a difference. So thank you say thank you 256 00:11:48,360 --> 00:11:50,160 Speaker 1: so much for that, and if you would do that 257 00:11:50,280 --> 00:11:51,960 Speaker 1: it would be wonderful as well, so that people could 258 00:11:51,960 --> 00:11:53,959 Speaker 1: find the podcast. If you'd like more info by the way, 259 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:55,760 Speaker 1: on how I can help. Well, we've got the brand 260 00:11:55,800 --> 00:11:59,480 Speaker 1: new Happy Families membership. It's live, it's available, we would 261 00:11:59,480 --> 00:12:01,480 Speaker 1: love for you to take advantage of it, and it's 262 00:12:01,679 --> 00:12:05,320 Speaker 1: so breathtakingly affordable. So if you would like to have 263 00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:08,200 Speaker 1: ongoing support, I guess like having a parenting expert in 264 00:12:08,240 --> 00:12:10,280 Speaker 1: your pocket, I'm right there popping up and saying, Ah, 265 00:12:10,360 --> 00:12:12,320 Speaker 1: have you thought about have you thought about trying this? 266 00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:15,000 Speaker 1: It might just make a difference. I would love for 267 00:12:15,040 --> 00:12:16,400 Speaker 1: you to join in. All you've got to do to 268 00:12:16,440 --> 00:12:18,640 Speaker 1: find all the info about the Happy Families memberships and 269 00:12:18,679 --> 00:12:21,440 Speaker 1: the incredible value and impact that they can have on 270 00:12:21,480 --> 00:12:24,600 Speaker 1: your families, go to Happy Families dot com dot au 271 00:12:24,800 --> 00:12:28,080 Speaker 1: or visit my Facebook page doctor Justin Colson's Happy Families