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Speaker 1: You fold or scrunch.

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Speaker 2: I do that when you wrap it around your hand

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Speaker 2: like that, and it's like, yeah, let me call that.

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Speaker 3: Now that's a fold.

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Speaker 1: I'd say it's a I think it. Do you think

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Speaker 1: I do? Young?

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Speaker 2: Do you sit or do you stand?

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Speaker 1: I stand?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? Right, you I stand stand.

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Speaker 1: It said, you're not.

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Speaker 3: You've got the credits. You stand. You've got an open.

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Speaker 1: Welcome back to two doting dads and one mom slash Nana.

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Speaker 3: Yeah my name?

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Speaker 1: You know you's that? I say?

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Speaker 2: I'm Maddy Jay your third?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, your third?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I should know my place.

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Speaker 1: I I'm Matty Jo.

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Speaker 3: You've got to tell me that you've got to give

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Speaker 3: me more direction.

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Speaker 2: I actually did.

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Speaker 1: I did. I clearly remember saying that Ash will introduce

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Speaker 1: himself and then you will talk.

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Speaker 2: This is going to go swimming.

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Speaker 1: I am Mattie J.

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Speaker 3: Now you go, and I am Ellie and I am matt.

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Speaker 1: Just just a name. No, sorry, continue continue?

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Speaker 2: That was it? I think was it? That's good.

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Speaker 1: I think that was really good.

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Speaker 3: Would you like me to do it again?

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Speaker 2: No? That's why there's two bigger. This is a podcast

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Speaker 2: all about the good, the bad, and the relatable of

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Speaker 2: parenting and of course today we have Matt's mum here

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Speaker 2: to get to the bottom of why and how Matt

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Speaker 2: is why he is like that he is.

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Speaker 1: Can I just say, Mum, if at any point you

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Speaker 1: feel uncomfortable around Ash, please let me know.

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Speaker 2: What about me? What if I feel uncomfortable?

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Speaker 1: I've just since if you were right just being very

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Speaker 1: uncomfortable around the two of you.

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Speaker 2: Well, do you want to start calling me dad now

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Speaker 2: or at the end of the podcast.

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Speaker 1: It's great to have mom here. This episode is going

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Speaker 1: to be a little bit different because normally we have

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Speaker 1: guests on a bonus episode. However, however, right now when

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Speaker 1: this comes out, Ash.

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Speaker 2: Will be balls deep in some bintang in Bali.

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Speaker 1: He is on holiday. So we have pre recorded this

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Speaker 1: episode with my mother. So it's not going to be

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Speaker 1: a normal episode in that we don't have the lies,

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Speaker 1: we don't have ordinary parenting as a segment. It's just

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Speaker 1: going to be with my mother dearest.

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Speaker 2: Yes, And even though we don't have those segments, we

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Speaker 2: do have some other juicy things about to ask about foreskins.

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Speaker 1: So a few people had suggested we get our parents

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Speaker 1: on here, and it just so happened that Laura is

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Speaker 1: well a time of recording. Laura is away in Bali

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Speaker 1: and at the same time, by pure coincidence, my sister

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Speaker 1: was moving house, so Mum was coming down. It's worked

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Speaker 1: out perfectly. So I've hijacked my mum, roped her into

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Speaker 1: being in my house so I can get some help

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Speaker 1: with the kids, and we.

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Speaker 2: Thought chuck her on the pod.

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Speaker 1: So mom should be packing boxes at my.

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Speaker 2: Sister's out instead, she's here talking with us.

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Speaker 1: So we're doing your favor, thanks, Matte.

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Speaker 2: Plenty of time to pack boxes.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, this is actually gonna be a busy day for you.

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Speaker 1: You're going to have a podcasts in the morning, packing

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Speaker 1: boxes in the afternoon, and then you're also doing daycare

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Speaker 1: pickup as well. And if we could have dinner ready

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Speaker 1: by six, I'd love that. Maybe roast chicken.

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Speaker 2: So for those of you, Matt's mum had five kids.

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Speaker 2: All right, Matt, you're.

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Speaker 1: The middle I am the middle child.

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Speaker 2: Would you say Matt's your favorite?

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Speaker 3: Not going to get me out on that one. Now,

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Speaker 3: I love all my children equally.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what I say too. However, however, and being

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Speaker 2: the middle child, you've got how many sisters, Matt one sister.

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Speaker 1: So it is just the one I think I don't

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Speaker 1: even know how old they are because in my eyes

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Speaker 1: they're still like eighteen. But Tom is the youngest. Well,

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Speaker 1: actually you sorry you introduced the kids.

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Speaker 2: Yes, I have five.

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Speaker 3: I can't remember.

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Speaker 2: Name is middle names dated.

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Speaker 3: Bird, Tom is twenty eight, the twenty eight, David is

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Speaker 3: thirty one, and you are thirty thirty six.

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Speaker 2: Nearly forty thirty, thirty.

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Speaker 3: Three, thirty seven, and Adam is thirty nine.

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Speaker 2: Wow. Like so there's like I had ten year gap

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Speaker 2: between the first Yeah. Yeah, And out of all five

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Speaker 2: of them, where was Matt ranked in terms of being

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Speaker 2: an easy child or being a problem child?

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Speaker 3: No, I wouldn't say it was a problem. In fact,

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Speaker 3: I was. I suppose looking back, I was quite fortunate

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Speaker 3: that the four boys well relatively easy. I didn't have

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Speaker 3: big problems. I had big problems with Kate, and at

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Speaker 3: a certain age of fifteen, she wanted to do all

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Speaker 3: the things that you don't want a fifteen year old

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Speaker 3: going to the valley, going to this.

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Speaker 1: For those of you who don't know, the valley in

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Speaker 1: Brisbane is it's where all the clubs are. So what

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Speaker 1: you're trying to say is Kate was the problem.

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Speaker 3: I do think I mean, I know you're generalizing, but

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Speaker 3: I do think that girls mature quicker, and they just

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Speaker 3: think they can do these things earlier. You guys, the

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Speaker 3: four of you didn't want to do anything too early.

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Speaker 3: When you got to eighteen, that's when you partied more

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Speaker 3: and went out more.

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Speaker 2: You know of it.

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Speaker 1: What was I like as a primary school child versus

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Speaker 1: a teenager and then young adults?

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Speaker 3: Primary school, you were really into sport, an athlete, but

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Speaker 3: that was a good outlet. You know, you just loved

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Speaker 3: long distance running.

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Speaker 1: USh is very aware of that, so that was that

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Speaker 1: was good.

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Speaker 3: You loved cricket, so you were pretty passionate about sport.

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Speaker 2: Was he naudy at school like at that age?

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Speaker 3: Now he wasn't anaudy at school? He did at home

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Speaker 3: the mandatory punching his sister in the face to her noseblood,

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Speaker 3: You do things like that.

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Speaker 1: It was one time.

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Speaker 2: Sure it was.

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Speaker 3: Sibling rivalry in my family was alive and well, and

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Speaker 3: it was usually the older one on the next one

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Speaker 3: the rivalry. And I used to say to people, somebody

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Speaker 3: is always fighting with somebody else. It really was, And

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Speaker 3: that was I think. You go into parenthood and you

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Speaker 3: think you're going to have a little house on the prairie,

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Speaker 3: and it wasn't for a while, and that was hard.

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Speaker 3: But there was a distinct I remember, and I suppose

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Speaker 3: the older ones were about fourteen ten, and I listened

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Speaker 3: and I thought, they're all in the same room and

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Speaker 3: they're not killing each other.

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Speaker 1: We were stoned.

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Speaker 3: But I remember listening at the door, thinking, oh my god,

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Speaker 3: they're talking, they're discussing, they're laughing, they're enjoying each other's company.

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Speaker 3: And that was actually your watershed moment that you'd gone

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Speaker 3: past this young rivalry and attacking each other and you

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Speaker 3: were getting on as young adults, and that was a

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Speaker 3: real joy.

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Speaker 1: Did you always think you're going to have five? Was

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Speaker 1: that the plan when you were growing up? Did you

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Speaker 1: think I'm going to have a big family? Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Really, yeah, for whatever reason, but I suppose coming from Wales,

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Speaker 3: not having my family here, I sort of wanted my tribe.

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Speaker 3: I think were.

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Speaker 2: There some days where you just like, why the fuck

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Speaker 2: a I done this?

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Speaker 3: You know, honestly would never have gone that far to

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Speaker 3: say I wish I hadn't done this. However, it was hard.

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Speaker 3: The first three were three years and one month apart,

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Speaker 3: so that was just hard.

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Speaker 1: Work.

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Speaker 3: I'd go on holiday and by the time I'd put

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Speaker 3: some block on everybody and got the snacks together and

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Speaker 3: go to the beach, someone needed a nap. It was

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Speaker 3: hard to get every.

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Speaker 2: Logistics of it because we just had this really warm

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Speaker 2: weekend and like I took, I was just on my

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Speaker 2: home apriles away and two kids out of the beach

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Speaker 2: and it's like an hour to get them.

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Speaker 3: Out of the door, to get them at the door,

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Speaker 3: and then.

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Speaker 2: You're like trying to get them home from the beach

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Speaker 2: and the it's just just I don't know how you

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Speaker 2: did it with five. I mean, I suppose you just

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Speaker 2: did your best and just to see if we make

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Speaker 2: it or not.

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Speaker 1: What would you say was the hardest transition? Was it

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Speaker 1: three to four?

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Speaker 2: Four to five?

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Speaker 3: The hardest was having three because there was three in

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Speaker 3: three years and that was full on. But you realize

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Speaker 3: how big families work because with the younger two, do

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Speaker 3: you remember you were on duty. I would allocate a

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Speaker 3: job to you to look after the little is. It

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Speaker 3: would be two of you watching the younger two in

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Speaker 3: the bath, getting them dressed, lying down, reading a story.

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Speaker 3: And I realized big families work because often families maybe

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Speaker 3: only have two and they're eighteen months apart, so they

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Speaker 3: kind of grow up together. But by the time Tom

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Speaker 3: was born, the youngest Adam was eleven, Kate was ten,

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Speaker 3: and you were nine.

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Speaker 2: So there were hands to help and I had.

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Speaker 3: A Tom roster on the fridge. Everybody, remember, everybody had

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Speaker 3: a job to do to help Tom. And it was

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Speaker 3: then that I thought, you know, all this is happening.

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Speaker 1: I'll just was like, I might have a six again.

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Speaker 3: Well if i'd had a husband maybe.

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Speaker 2: Now married, and what a shame I've had a sex

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Speaker 2: to me, Look, I want to go back to I

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Speaker 2: want to ask you a question about Matt's four skin. Okay,

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Speaker 2: because this story came as a massive shock to me

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Speaker 2: and everybody else.

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Speaker 1: I think like part of me is thinking, like, did

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Speaker 1: I have I remembered it correctly? Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, So that's where I want to find out. So

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Speaker 2: it was six. So for those who haven't heard this story,

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Speaker 2: I go back to one of our previous episodes Early Day,

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Speaker 2: where we talked about Matt was born and kept his

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Speaker 2: foreskin until the age of six. But ee, if you

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Speaker 2: don't mind just giving an overview of what that was like.

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Speaker 3: Decided not on the medical advice and everything was fine,

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Speaker 3: and then Matt would just really wee all over the toilet.

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Speaker 2: Like an elephant's trunk, and it was.

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Speaker 3: Really, this is crazy. How can he missed that big hole?

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Speaker 3: And I thought I'd better watch him we And then

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Speaker 3: he went to the toilet and I'm not kidding this

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Speaker 3: week came out at right angles to his penis and

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Speaker 3: I looked at him and thought, what the hell is

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Speaker 3: going on? So I didn't want to be too personal

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Speaker 3: and manipulate his fore skin. No, I did try, thinking

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Speaker 3: this hole is not in the right place, So went

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Speaker 3: to the GP. He examined it and said, yeah, you

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Speaker 3: got a lot of scar tissue over this portion and

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Speaker 3: it's made it go out at right angles. You've got

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Speaker 3: to have a circumcision.

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Speaker 1: Where was a scar tissue?

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Speaker 2: I didn't know he had a five skin?

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Speaker 3: No, yeah, there was just some extra skin that had

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Speaker 3: gone five skin. Boy, So got to have the circumcision,

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Speaker 3: but hadn't obviously a general and had it done. And

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Speaker 3: I had this pamphlet of how to care for this

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Speaker 3: penis and it was a learning curse.

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Speaker 2: Anyone right now, I would love to see the pamphlet

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Speaker 2: and says how to care for this penis.

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Speaker 1: Do you remember any of the key steps that people

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Speaker 1: should be aware of?

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Speaker 3: Well, I remember, oh, you had to take the outer

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Speaker 3: bandage off, and then used to say line solution, and

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Speaker 3: there in bold letters was on day five, completely remove

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Speaker 3: the dressing.

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Speaker 1: I remember, I'm going to sharp pain in my penis.

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Speaker 3: Right now, and it said soaking the bath. So you

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Speaker 3: soaked in the bath and you came out and I thought, oh.

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Speaker 1: It must have been like day fifteen. But there's a

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Speaker 1: like rubbed off or something. Day five. It's quite I

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Speaker 1: don't think, just come out of surgery. Mum was there, like,

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Speaker 1: let's take off the bandage, and I was like, are

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Speaker 1: you sure? Mom? She's like, that's what it says.

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Speaker 3: And I looked at that bandage and I thought, look

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Speaker 3: stuck on.

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Speaker 2: I's currently grabbing hold of his penis.

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Speaker 3: It's really important that you take this off. And I

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Speaker 3: just had to pick it and whip it off. And

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Speaker 3: there's poor kid. I mean, you were doubled up and

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Speaker 3: you run around the room holding your penis.

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Speaker 1: Can you feel that? I loved?

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Speaker 2: I still got mine?

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Speaker 3: Oh it was red raw, and I thought maybe I

255
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Speaker 3: shouldn't have done that.

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Speaker 2: You've literally ripped it off like a band aid, but

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Speaker 2: on the most sensitive part of the anatomy.

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Speaker 1: Memory beautiful, God, penis is beautiful, Thanks mom.

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Speaker 2: Something I would thought I heard out of Laura's mouth,

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Speaker 2: not Matt's mom's mouth. Did you have an option then

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Speaker 2: to do the full circuses or be like, hey, would

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Speaker 2: they give you an option to like, if you want

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Speaker 2: to keep a force skin, we can just take it.

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Speaker 3: Was just the only option was totally all or nothing.

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Speaker 3: Imagine if they said it like with right angled.

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Speaker 2: We imagine if they said, either he goes through his

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Speaker 2: life with the right angle, pee, or your chop the

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Speaker 2: whole penis off. Oh, right angle, just go the right angle?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, be interesting, wouldn't it when you're actually when you're

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00:14:25,680 --> 00:14:30,080
Speaker 3: thinking about making love? Because normally that sperm would need

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Speaker 3: to shoot straight up, but if it was going at

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Speaker 3: right angled, it might get lost and not really nowhere.

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Speaker 1: I don't know.

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Speaker 2: About that, but anyway, I'm learning a lot of Matt's

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Speaker 2: penis anatomy.

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Speaker 1: What was it like as a teenager. I feel like

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Speaker 1: I had moments where I was very well behaved, and

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Speaker 1: I feel like there were moments and I veered.

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Speaker 3: Of course, I don't think you'veered of expelled.

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Speaker 1: Expelled, expelled from school camp.

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Speaker 3: Well, let's be honest. Matt started a midnight boxing tournament.

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Speaker 1: He was on this camp fight club.

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Speaker 3: And he and his mate started this.

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Speaker 1: On school camp.

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Speaker 2: Where was school campout?

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Speaker 3: It was it.

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Speaker 1: Was like on the farms. You did five weeks.

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Speaker 2: I mean, let me go straight. You went on a

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Speaker 2: school camp. Was it a boys school?

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Speaker 1: Co ed?

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Speaker 2: Coed? And you just decided to start a fight club.

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Speaker 1: Correct on the camp, but you would have like pillows,

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Speaker 1: a pillow fight pillow gloves.

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Speaker 2: Let's dainty, but let's go Yeah.

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Speaker 3: And so we got a call to say your son

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Speaker 3: has been involved in organizing a boxing I.

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Speaker 1: Was I was the sacrificial lamb. Oh yeah, okay, I

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Speaker 1: wasn't the ringleader, but I was dobbed in by the others.

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Speaker 3: So he did have to come home early. The good

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Speaker 3: news is that Matt still has retained the championship for

301
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Speaker 3: the midnight box At the.

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Speaker 2: Time, how old was it was fifteen, troubling age.

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Speaker 1: I was at a pretty strict school and I remember

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Speaker 1: I think I was fourteen, and I really wanted to

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00:16:10,560 --> 00:16:13,240
Speaker 1: have frosted tips, like really badly.

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Speaker 2: You and everybody else at fourteen.

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00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:18,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, and you let me do it, which is no.

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Speaker 2: No.

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00:16:18,400 --> 00:16:21,200
Speaker 3: What happened was your auntie, who's a headdresser, came from

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Speaker 3: Wales and she had all this bleach and stuff and

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Speaker 3: she was showing me how to do it. Never done

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00:16:26,640 --> 00:16:28,880
Speaker 3: it in my life, and you said, I wouldn't mind

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Speaker 3: having highlights. Okay, boy, sit, your mother's going to do it.

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Speaker 3: So I did all these highlights and overprocessed it just tad.

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00:16:38,480 --> 00:16:41,960
Speaker 3: So you did look a little bit over blonde. Anyway,

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Speaker 3: you went to school looked great.

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Speaker 1: I don't know if I did.

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Speaker 2: I'm not picturing it looking.

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Speaker 3: And the next day we had what what they called

320
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Speaker 3: the people who controlled the universe.

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Speaker 1: Security we had. The school was really strict, so we

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00:16:55,360 --> 00:16:58,960
Speaker 1: had marshals who that the only job was to just

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Speaker 1: make sure that if anyone misbehaved in the school, you

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Speaker 1: got dealt with by the marshals.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god.

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Speaker 1: So they weren't teachers, that were essentially like police on campus.

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Speaker 3: They phoned me and they said, we've noticed that Matthew

328
00:17:11,960 --> 00:17:16,879
Speaker 3: has come with dyed hair. We don't know who would

329
00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:21,000
Speaker 3: have done that to him, and I don't know, I'm

330
00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:26,359
Speaker 3: not sure, but it's unacceptable. He'll have to have his

331
00:17:26,520 --> 00:17:30,240
Speaker 3: hair changed, and then he proceeded to say, this is

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Speaker 3: the honest troup. You know, you couldn't go to war

333
00:17:33,800 --> 00:17:37,880
Speaker 3: with a young man who did that, the marshal. The

334
00:17:37,920 --> 00:17:40,600
Speaker 3: marshal actually said military.

335
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Speaker 1: I think he was a vet, though I think it was.

336
00:17:43,440 --> 00:17:44,480
Speaker 2: Did they let you keep the hair?

337
00:17:44,600 --> 00:17:46,760
Speaker 1: No, I had to cut it he had.

338
00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:52,480
Speaker 2: Did they make you cut it or what? That's wild?

339
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Speaker 2: Why did you send him to this school to straighten

340
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Speaker 2: him out?

341
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Speaker 3: No? No, Well it was a strict school, but it

342
00:17:58,359 --> 00:18:01,520
Speaker 3: was a co ed so it was a co ed

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00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:04,840
Speaker 3: private school and they did have a lot of good things,

344
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Speaker 3: like Ironbach which was a farm and you went for

345
00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:08,919
Speaker 3: a term and you and.

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Speaker 1: Good for sport as well.

347
00:18:10,119 --> 00:18:14,000
Speaker 3: And good for sport, it was good for drama.

348
00:18:14,720 --> 00:18:15,960
Speaker 2: Oh that's where he gets it.

349
00:18:16,160 --> 00:18:19,080
Speaker 1: Yeah. Would you say you kept us kids on a

350
00:18:19,160 --> 00:18:22,560
Speaker 1: tight leash or did you take the approach of giving

351
00:18:22,640 --> 00:18:23,800
Speaker 1: us total free rerain?

352
00:18:24,080 --> 00:18:27,199
Speaker 3: Do you know? I think when you're a single parent

353
00:18:28,560 --> 00:18:31,679
Speaker 3: that is very hard to keep all your children on

354
00:18:31,720 --> 00:18:36,520
Speaker 3: a tight rain because it's physically you just drown. So

355
00:18:36,560 --> 00:18:40,439
Speaker 3: I wouldn't say I did that, But you didn't push

356
00:18:40,600 --> 00:18:44,760
Speaker 3: that too far your sister did that? You remember that

357
00:18:45,080 --> 00:18:48,399
Speaker 3: you would be part of the team that would hold

358
00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:51,960
Speaker 3: her back in the house so she couldn't go out

359
00:18:52,240 --> 00:18:54,520
Speaker 3: with unsavory individuals.

360
00:18:54,520 --> 00:18:57,679
Speaker 1: Imber I remember. And also she would wag school, so

361
00:18:57,720 --> 00:19:01,120
Speaker 1: we would leave in the morning and she would go

362
00:19:01,200 --> 00:19:03,160
Speaker 1: with other clothes in her backpack, and then she would

363
00:19:03,160 --> 00:19:04,920
Speaker 1: not go to school, and I'd be like, please come

364
00:19:04,960 --> 00:19:07,560
Speaker 1: to school, and she's like, shut up, do what I want.

365
00:19:07,640 --> 00:19:10,280
Speaker 3: Well, interesting thing with that was she had a part

366
00:19:10,280 --> 00:19:13,760
Speaker 3: time job at Mecca's. One Friday afternoon, I was going

367
00:19:13,800 --> 00:19:16,800
Speaker 3: to school late and I hadn't had lunch, and I

368
00:19:16,960 --> 00:19:19,400
Speaker 3: never do this during the day, and I thought, oh,

369
00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:22,520
Speaker 3: I'll get maccas. I'd taken Kate to school that morning,

370
00:19:23,359 --> 00:19:25,720
Speaker 3: and I went through the drive through to order my

371
00:19:25,880 --> 00:19:29,879
Speaker 3: filet of fish burger, the fish filet, and I looked

372
00:19:29,960 --> 00:19:33,359
Speaker 3: up and this was about twelve o'clock and there was

373
00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:35,840
Speaker 3: Kate and I'd taken to the school that morning.

374
00:19:35,960 --> 00:19:39,040
Speaker 2: She worked the drive through. She was working. She could

375
00:19:39,080 --> 00:19:40,440
Speaker 2: have been doing way worse.

376
00:19:40,760 --> 00:19:45,040
Speaker 3: And I just looked at her and I couldn't speak,

377
00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:48,520
Speaker 3: and eventually I said, I will talk to you when

378
00:19:48,560 --> 00:19:50,560
Speaker 3: you get home. And I didn't get my filet.

379
00:19:50,720 --> 00:19:55,680
Speaker 1: I thought, you're going to say I will get one.

380
00:19:54,280 --> 00:19:58,919
Speaker 2: And I will not be paying for it. You should

381
00:19:58,920 --> 00:19:59,480
Speaker 2: have for sure.

382
00:20:00,160 --> 00:20:04,200
Speaker 3: She was quite strong willed and she was a naughty one. Yeah,

383
00:20:04,280 --> 00:20:05,880
Speaker 3: she was a bit naughty.

384
00:20:06,119 --> 00:20:06,359
Speaker 2: Yeah.

385
00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:09,240
Speaker 1: I love how this has just become like her trash.

386
00:20:10,920 --> 00:20:12,960
Speaker 1: What else did she do wrong as well? She never

387
00:20:12,960 --> 00:20:14,480
Speaker 1: paid you back that two hundred bucks that she owed

388
00:20:14,520 --> 00:20:15,199
Speaker 1: you as well? Did she?

389
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:20,119
Speaker 2: And like having four boys a lot of testosterone in

390
00:20:20,200 --> 00:20:24,120
Speaker 2: the house and them getting into their teenage years, Matt

391
00:20:24,240 --> 00:20:27,479
Speaker 2: was obviously a bit younger than the older you had

392
00:20:27,520 --> 00:20:29,000
Speaker 2: an older one oldest boy.

393
00:20:29,040 --> 00:20:31,200
Speaker 1: Can I just say this question was asked so many

394
00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:34,000
Speaker 1: times by the perverts of this country, what's wrong with

395
00:20:34,040 --> 00:20:34,480
Speaker 1: you people?

396
00:20:34,720 --> 00:20:37,439
Speaker 2: There was obviously some masturbating happening in the house with

397
00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:38,280
Speaker 2: all these boys.

398
00:20:41,280 --> 00:20:42,439
Speaker 3: I don't think so.

399
00:20:43,640 --> 00:20:47,600
Speaker 2: How many times or if any, did you walk in

400
00:20:47,640 --> 00:20:50,680
Speaker 2: on our young Matthew here I would say pulling the

401
00:20:50,680 --> 00:20:52,200
Speaker 2: skin back, but he didn't have any on there.

402
00:20:53,280 --> 00:20:58,920
Speaker 3: Now, I actually not as often as you would think.

403
00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:02,000
Speaker 2: Not as often, or do you just suspect it?

404
00:21:03,840 --> 00:21:09,480
Speaker 3: There was a time and the name will I will

405
00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:13,040
Speaker 3: not reveal the name of Let's say it wasn't Matt.

406
00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:16,080
Speaker 3: And we just moved into a house and we hadn't

407
00:21:16,160 --> 00:21:20,360
Speaker 3: yet put curtains up, and it was it was morning,

408
00:21:21,160 --> 00:21:24,280
Speaker 3: and I just happened to be outside, passing the window

409
00:21:24,920 --> 00:21:29,359
Speaker 3: and I looked across. Okay, someone's having a good time.

410
00:21:29,760 --> 00:21:32,600
Speaker 3: I shall just walk on by. That's the honest Did

411
00:21:32,680 --> 00:21:35,080
Speaker 3: I see it? Wasn't you?

412
00:21:35,520 --> 00:21:38,959
Speaker 2: Oh well, okay, I did find Are we protecting?

413
00:21:43,359 --> 00:21:46,959
Speaker 3: But I do remember when we were leaving that house

414
00:21:47,480 --> 00:21:51,760
Speaker 3: and unpacking and I had to dismantle your bed. There

415
00:21:51,800 --> 00:21:57,239
Speaker 3: were a number of condoms underneath still in the wrapper. No,

416
00:21:58,200 --> 00:21:58,919
Speaker 3: they had been.

417
00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:00,520
Speaker 2: Jerking off of the condom.

418
00:21:59,920 --> 00:22:03,760
Speaker 1: I was getting busy. I was wearing protection.

419
00:22:03,960 --> 00:22:05,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's very true.

420
00:22:05,840 --> 00:22:06,080
Speaker 3: Wasn't.

421
00:22:06,280 --> 00:22:10,439
Speaker 1: Let's not mention any names. Okay, I thought there was

422
00:22:10,520 --> 00:22:13,520
Speaker 1: one time though, in the ken Moore house. There was

423
00:22:13,520 --> 00:22:14,080
Speaker 1: one time.

424
00:22:14,680 --> 00:22:16,600
Speaker 2: Did you have any crusty towels? No?

425
00:22:16,680 --> 00:22:20,719
Speaker 1: I never used a towel. I think that I always

426
00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:23,600
Speaker 1: I always thought I was found out. There was one

427
00:22:23,720 --> 00:22:27,000
Speaker 1: night bedrooms were upstairs. Downstairs was like a computer room,

428
00:22:27,280 --> 00:22:29,040
Speaker 1: and then there was like a toilet in like the

429
00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:32,680
Speaker 1: rumpus area. And you must have woken up and seen

430
00:22:32,720 --> 00:22:34,920
Speaker 1: the light was on downstairs late at night, so you

431
00:22:34,960 --> 00:22:40,520
Speaker 1: came downstairs. I was in the bathroom and I'm pretty

432
00:22:40,560 --> 00:22:43,800
Speaker 1: sure I was doing my thing, and I'm pretty sure

433
00:22:43,840 --> 00:22:47,199
Speaker 1: you opened the door, remember this, And it was a

434
00:22:47,240 --> 00:22:49,000
Speaker 1: split second and you shut the door and then you

435
00:22:49,040 --> 00:22:51,280
Speaker 1: just said turn the light off when you finished. Do

436
00:22:51,359 --> 00:22:51,919
Speaker 1: you remember that?

437
00:22:53,240 --> 00:22:54,320
Speaker 2: God? Maybe it was k.

438
00:22:56,359 --> 00:22:58,400
Speaker 1: Okay great. I always thought I was found out, so

439
00:22:58,720 --> 00:22:59,120
Speaker 1: we don't.

440
00:22:59,520 --> 00:23:02,240
Speaker 3: But I did find out one more thing. It was

441
00:23:02,440 --> 00:23:05,840
Speaker 3: Echer Day and we always went to Eke.

442
00:23:06,280 --> 00:23:07,800
Speaker 2: For those of you who don't know Ekker, it's kind

443
00:23:07,800 --> 00:23:09,040
Speaker 2: of like the Easterns.

444
00:23:09,600 --> 00:23:13,560
Speaker 3: So your older brother didn't want to go this year,

445
00:23:13,600 --> 00:23:16,000
Speaker 3: and I thought, okay, that's all right, you can stay

446
00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:18,560
Speaker 3: at home. And then we got a telephone bill at

447
00:23:18,560 --> 00:23:22,040
Speaker 3: that time, and there were all these bills to some

448
00:23:22,280 --> 00:23:26,560
Speaker 3: remote island in the Pacific, and it was there were

449
00:23:26,800 --> 00:23:27,959
Speaker 3: hugely expensive.

450
00:23:28,000 --> 00:23:28,960
Speaker 2: It was laundering money.

451
00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:32,920
Speaker 3: It's ridiculous. We don't know anybody who lives on an

452
00:23:32,920 --> 00:23:36,280
Speaker 3: island in the Pacific. I'm under call Telstra. So I

453
00:23:36,320 --> 00:23:38,119
Speaker 3: called him up and I said, I'm looking at the

454
00:23:38,119 --> 00:23:41,640
Speaker 3: telephone bill. It's extraordinary. Ending it went on and on,

455
00:23:41,680 --> 00:23:44,800
Speaker 3: and this poor girl was like yeah, yeah, yeah, trying

456
00:23:44,840 --> 00:23:48,800
Speaker 3: to explain it, and she said, I have to say

457
00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:55,040
Speaker 3: that this does often happen, and it is a pawn size.

458
00:23:55,359 --> 00:23:58,399
Speaker 2: I wonder how many phone calls Telstra got that time,

459
00:23:58,840 --> 00:24:01,760
Speaker 2: in that time when that was so big, because obviously

460
00:24:01,800 --> 00:24:04,320
Speaker 2: now it's all online. Yeah, they must have just been

461
00:24:04,400 --> 00:24:05,560
Speaker 2: like rubbing their hands and.

462
00:24:06,040 --> 00:24:08,040
Speaker 1: As soon as people said the Pacific, they're like.

463
00:24:08,160 --> 00:24:10,800
Speaker 2: Well that's porn porn capital and.

464
00:24:10,760 --> 00:24:13,520
Speaker 3: Then blazed her. She did say, she said, look in

465
00:24:13,560 --> 00:24:17,120
Speaker 3: their defense, once you go into that site, every time

466
00:24:17,160 --> 00:24:20,119
Speaker 3: he tried to get out, it takes you deeper in.

467
00:24:20,600 --> 00:24:22,439
Speaker 3: It's very difficult to get h.

468
00:24:26,240 --> 00:24:28,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was funny because it opens up three, four,

469
00:24:28,880 --> 00:24:31,440
Speaker 2: five tabs, ten tabs, just all of a sudden.

470
00:24:32,280 --> 00:24:35,040
Speaker 3: And then we looked at the dates that we were.

471
00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:38,720
Speaker 2: Own.

472
00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:45,320
Speaker 1: What would you say was the dumbest thing I ever

473
00:24:45,359 --> 00:24:46,399
Speaker 1: did as a youngster.

474
00:24:47,880 --> 00:24:51,439
Speaker 3: It wasn't. It was a pure accident, but Matt was

475
00:24:51,480 --> 00:24:55,000
Speaker 3: his birthday. We had an outside slide and right in

476
00:24:55,040 --> 00:24:58,639
Speaker 3: the last five minutes he ran and fell back and

477
00:24:58,680 --> 00:24:59,400
Speaker 3: banged his head.

478
00:24:59,680 --> 00:25:03,840
Speaker 1: And we're playing Spotlight ass just people, miss Spotlark. Good game.

479
00:25:04,359 --> 00:25:08,439
Speaker 3: People were about to leave and Matt kept saying, is

480
00:25:08,480 --> 00:25:09,320
Speaker 3: this my partner?

481
00:25:09,800 --> 00:25:10,960
Speaker 2: You knocked yourself out?

482
00:25:12,320 --> 00:25:16,320
Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah, at your party? Why are people here? Kept

483
00:25:16,359 --> 00:25:20,320
Speaker 3: repeating it, and I thought there's something wrong here. So

484
00:25:20,440 --> 00:25:23,560
Speaker 3: we took him to hospital and he kept repeat had concussion.

485
00:25:24,240 --> 00:25:31,160
Speaker 3: But you didn't get into too many unfortunate situations like that,

486
00:25:31,320 --> 00:25:33,000
Speaker 3: did you? But that was a biggie.

487
00:25:33,040 --> 00:25:36,840
Speaker 1: No, I'm it was pretty I mean even I looked

488
00:25:36,880 --> 00:25:43,879
Speaker 1: back and I me and my mate smally like in

489
00:25:43,960 --> 00:25:45,920
Speaker 1: high school we were like, oh, we want to go

490
00:25:46,000 --> 00:25:48,359
Speaker 1: to Europe. Simply finished high school and we've been like

491
00:25:48,440 --> 00:25:51,919
Speaker 1: saving up, like whilst we had jobs, part time jobs

492
00:25:51,920 --> 00:25:54,040
Speaker 1: all through a year eleven and twelve. As soon as

493
00:25:54,080 --> 00:25:57,080
Speaker 1: school finished, we went to Europe. So we were seventeen. Wow,

494
00:25:57,200 --> 00:26:00,639
Speaker 1: that's when we finished school and Smallsey goodbye. And we

495
00:26:00,680 --> 00:26:02,040
Speaker 1: went to Europe when we were seventeen.

496
00:26:02,480 --> 00:26:07,960
Speaker 3: And I have thought I must have been exhausted. One

497
00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:12,200
Speaker 3: is going.

498
00:26:11,960 --> 00:26:15,160
Speaker 2: You go having like five kids, and people always talk

499
00:26:15,160 --> 00:26:17,520
Speaker 2: about like when they start to grow up, you start

500
00:26:17,560 --> 00:26:19,560
Speaker 2: to just worry about what they're doing. Did you worry

501
00:26:19,600 --> 00:26:22,000
Speaker 2: about them much? Would? Were you so confident?

502
00:26:22,480 --> 00:26:22,680
Speaker 1: No?

503
00:26:22,840 --> 00:26:27,200
Speaker 3: Oh? No, I think worry is a natural part of parenting.

504
00:26:27,960 --> 00:26:32,840
Speaker 3: Worry is to some extent healthy. It makes you hyper

505
00:26:32,920 --> 00:26:37,560
Speaker 3: vigilant and when you hear things that have happened to others,

506
00:26:37,920 --> 00:26:41,000
Speaker 3: even though it's scary, but it makes you more aware

507
00:26:41,040 --> 00:26:45,600
Speaker 3: and that I think normal. But then for a lot

508
00:26:45,640 --> 00:26:49,960
Speaker 3: of people, including me, there was a period where this

509
00:26:50,440 --> 00:26:55,560
Speaker 3: worrying aspect became unhealthy. It was short lived, but I

510
00:26:55,600 --> 00:26:59,480
Speaker 3: remember just getting anxious if anybody would take them in

511
00:26:59,520 --> 00:26:59,920
Speaker 3: the car.

512
00:27:00,520 --> 00:27:03,000
Speaker 1: How old were we at this time, you would have.

513
00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:08,760
Speaker 3: Been sort of six, only had three then, and I

514
00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:11,359
Speaker 3: didn't want you to stay over at people's houses.

515
00:27:11,680 --> 00:27:14,080
Speaker 1: Did something happen to start that process.

516
00:27:14,240 --> 00:27:17,399
Speaker 3: No, I was just very aware that I was really

517
00:27:17,480 --> 00:27:22,080
Speaker 3: getting super anxious. I was aware of it and was

518
00:27:22,160 --> 00:27:26,040
Speaker 3: quite scared about it. Almost wanted to keep you in

519
00:27:26,040 --> 00:27:29,080
Speaker 3: a wardrobe so you didn't get hurt, because you'd hear

520
00:27:29,160 --> 00:27:33,240
Speaker 3: things on TV and it's horrific, and you just try

521
00:27:33,280 --> 00:27:36,800
Speaker 3: to imagine what if something happened, and knowing that you

522
00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:41,000
Speaker 3: I'd never be able to cope anyway. It was interesting

523
00:27:41,040 --> 00:27:44,760
Speaker 3: that at that time when we used to read Sunday newspapers,

524
00:27:45,480 --> 00:27:47,880
Speaker 3: and there was a magazine and it was a story

525
00:27:48,040 --> 00:27:52,080
Speaker 3: about an environmentalist, a very passionate man who traveled the

526
00:27:52,119 --> 00:27:57,920
Speaker 3: world speaking at conferences, going to governments, trying to remove

527
00:27:58,320 --> 00:28:03,600
Speaker 3: pesticides from the food chain, very passionate man, and he

528
00:28:03,720 --> 00:28:07,480
Speaker 3: dropped dead at forty two and the whole article. It's

529
00:28:07,560 --> 00:28:13,480
Speaker 3: now a syndrome. What happened in that what he worried

530
00:28:13,520 --> 00:28:18,000
Speaker 3: about didn't kill him. The worry killed him caused so

531
00:28:18,160 --> 00:28:21,400
Speaker 3: much stress in his life. And that was like an

532
00:28:21,400 --> 00:28:23,760
Speaker 3: epiphany to me. When I read this, it was almost

533
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:26,119
Speaker 3: as if it was sent to me, and at that

534
00:28:26,359 --> 00:28:31,160
Speaker 3: moment it was, you know, you have so little control

535
00:28:31,560 --> 00:28:34,720
Speaker 3: what the universe has for you in the future, and

536
00:28:34,760 --> 00:28:36,840
Speaker 3: you've got to kind of give it up. You don't

537
00:28:36,880 --> 00:28:40,960
Speaker 3: want anything to happen, but you've got to just let

538
00:28:41,040 --> 00:28:43,880
Speaker 3: it go and let them have their own lives and

539
00:28:44,440 --> 00:28:45,600
Speaker 3: enjoy each day.

540
00:28:45,920 --> 00:28:48,200
Speaker 1: Does it get easier as we get older? Is it

541
00:28:48,240 --> 00:28:50,160
Speaker 1: out of sight, out of mind?

542
00:28:50,280 --> 00:28:54,640
Speaker 3: It does get easier. I was a little worried, you're

543
00:28:54,680 --> 00:28:57,440
Speaker 3: going to Europe, but you had family to go to.

544
00:28:57,880 --> 00:29:00,760
Speaker 3: But on the converse of that, this sounds a big

545
00:29:00,840 --> 00:29:05,120
Speaker 3: corny but Bett Middler's song The Rose, there's a line

546
00:29:05,160 --> 00:29:08,560
Speaker 3: in that and I really held onto that those who

547
00:29:08,600 --> 00:29:14,360
Speaker 3: are afraid to die never learned to live. And I thought, yeah,

548
00:29:14,480 --> 00:29:16,640
Speaker 3: do I want my kids to live? Do I want

549
00:29:16,680 --> 00:29:20,120
Speaker 3: them to experience all these things? And yes there's danger involved,

550
00:29:20,600 --> 00:29:26,480
Speaker 3: but yes I do want that for them just relinquish

551
00:29:26,560 --> 00:29:29,760
Speaker 3: and say they have their own pathway and you just

552
00:29:29,920 --> 00:29:30,600
Speaker 3: have to hope and.

553
00:29:30,600 --> 00:29:33,560
Speaker 2: Pray that you'll be It's really good advice because you're right.

554
00:29:35,320 --> 00:29:37,440
Speaker 1: What traits then, did you want to try and instill

555
00:29:37,680 --> 00:29:38,720
Speaker 1: into us as kids?

556
00:29:39,200 --> 00:29:44,560
Speaker 3: Everybody is born with this individual genetic mix. You know,

557
00:29:44,600 --> 00:29:48,200
Speaker 3: you've got those genes, but they're mixed together differently. I

558
00:29:48,280 --> 00:29:53,680
Speaker 3: suppose you hope that you will be kind individuals. But

559
00:29:53,880 --> 00:29:57,920
Speaker 3: one thing that now, when I see you all as adults,

560
00:29:58,120 --> 00:30:02,040
Speaker 3: I know that you chan pion at the underdog. You

561
00:30:02,120 --> 00:30:02,800
Speaker 3: all do that.

562
00:30:08,520 --> 00:30:10,320
Speaker 2: I'm an alpha mats.

563
00:30:10,360 --> 00:30:12,880
Speaker 3: There's been a lot of on the news lately of

564
00:30:13,000 --> 00:30:17,280
Speaker 3: citizens arrest, you know, people stepping in because of the crime.

565
00:30:17,480 --> 00:30:19,640
Speaker 3: And I as much as you don't want to put

566
00:30:19,680 --> 00:30:22,920
Speaker 3: your child in danger, but I know that all of you,

567
00:30:23,320 --> 00:30:27,239
Speaker 3: including Kate, if you pass somebody in need, I know

568
00:30:27,400 --> 00:30:30,640
Speaker 3: that you would render assistance. And that's what I would

569
00:30:30,720 --> 00:30:33,120
Speaker 3: hope that you would never And I don't have to

570
00:30:33,160 --> 00:30:35,320
Speaker 3: hope because I know that's what you would do, and

571
00:30:35,360 --> 00:30:37,640
Speaker 3: you did it once. Do you remember on the beach?

572
00:30:37,680 --> 00:30:39,480
Speaker 1: I want to say that I didn't ask my mum

573
00:30:39,560 --> 00:30:40,560
Speaker 1: to tell these stories.

574
00:30:43,080 --> 00:30:47,240
Speaker 3: Please continue, Please put me up go, but do you

575
00:30:47,280 --> 00:30:50,120
Speaker 3: remember on the beach there was a man that was

576
00:30:50,200 --> 00:30:52,720
Speaker 3: attacking somebody and you.

577
00:30:52,920 --> 00:31:02,520
Speaker 1: Hero, well, look, we're at Barron and we had an

578
00:31:02,520 --> 00:31:05,280
Speaker 1: afternoon flight and we had a couple of hours to

579
00:31:05,320 --> 00:31:07,200
Speaker 1: kill where we'd already checked out. We went to the

580
00:31:07,200 --> 00:31:09,600
Speaker 1: main pub and Byron was a little park in front

581
00:31:09,640 --> 00:31:11,520
Speaker 1: of them, so we had lunch. Their kids were on

582
00:31:11,560 --> 00:31:13,920
Speaker 1: the swing, and we kind of noticed in the car

583
00:31:14,000 --> 00:31:16,920
Speaker 1: park there were these kids who were like really roy recently,

584
00:31:17,400 --> 00:31:18,960
Speaker 1: oh maybe like a couple of years ago.

585
00:31:19,080 --> 00:31:21,080
Speaker 2: So you had Maley, yeah.

586
00:31:21,320 --> 00:31:23,400
Speaker 1: Marley, I don't think Lola was around then, and we

587
00:31:23,480 --> 00:31:25,520
Speaker 1: kind of you could hear these kids, like you know,

588
00:31:25,680 --> 00:31:28,120
Speaker 1: music blurring in the car park and they were kind

589
00:31:28,120 --> 00:31:30,080
Speaker 1: of getting rowdy and rowdy and they sounded like having

590
00:31:30,120 --> 00:31:32,360
Speaker 1: a few arguments amongst each other. And then as we

591
00:31:32,360 --> 00:31:34,400
Speaker 1: were like literally in the park, this one of the

592
00:31:34,480 --> 00:31:37,520
Speaker 1: kids came across and was like swearing at himself and yelling.

593
00:31:38,440 --> 00:31:42,040
Speaker 1: He was like fucking hell rah. And then this lovely

594
00:31:42,120 --> 00:31:45,080
Speaker 1: elderly couple were kind of like almost power walking and

595
00:31:45,200 --> 00:31:48,800
Speaker 1: active wear along the footpath and he just like blined

596
00:31:48,840 --> 00:31:52,440
Speaker 1: for them and fly kicked what Yeah, And then there's

597
00:31:52,480 --> 00:31:55,960
Speaker 1: a lovely family as a Fijian dad and he was

598
00:31:56,040 --> 00:31:58,680
Speaker 1: like solid And when that happened, we kind of looked

599
00:31:58,680 --> 00:32:00,600
Speaker 1: at each other and just gave each other and not

600
00:32:01,480 --> 00:32:02,840
Speaker 1: we just started running.

601
00:32:02,880 --> 00:32:03,600
Speaker 2: He was like let's go.

602
00:32:03,640 --> 00:32:08,360
Speaker 1: Why boy, He was looking at me as like don't

603
00:32:08,520 --> 00:32:10,360
Speaker 1: you don't need to I've got this cover, and I.

604
00:32:10,240 --> 00:32:11,880
Speaker 2: Was like, just come to even it out.

605
00:32:13,640 --> 00:32:17,040
Speaker 1: He just picked me up and ran with me.

606
00:32:17,400 --> 00:32:18,280
Speaker 2: Used you as a weapon.

607
00:32:19,160 --> 00:32:21,320
Speaker 1: We tackled this guy and that pinned it down. And

608
00:32:21,520 --> 00:32:24,040
Speaker 1: there's a statue of the environ base what that is?

609
00:32:25,560 --> 00:32:27,200
Speaker 1: Police came in like two seconds.

610
00:32:27,240 --> 00:32:31,560
Speaker 2: Wow, and mate, you're just just a hero of the citizens.

611
00:32:32,400 --> 00:32:34,320
Speaker 2: Had you had to drag your mummy in on the

612
00:32:34,360 --> 00:32:38,080
Speaker 2: podcast just so that you could get that story. Thanks,

613
00:32:39,040 --> 00:32:42,720
Speaker 2: thank you for setting him up with that one. Look,

614
00:32:42,760 --> 00:32:45,000
Speaker 2: it's it is a good trait to have.

615
00:32:45,320 --> 00:32:49,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I know it's scary. You know, you don't

616
00:32:49,080 --> 00:32:52,560
Speaker 3: want them to step in and get harmed. But I

617
00:32:52,600 --> 00:32:55,680
Speaker 3: don't think I'm a woman, an older woman, but if

618
00:32:55,720 --> 00:32:58,360
Speaker 3: someone if I passed someone in need, i'd have to.

619
00:32:58,480 --> 00:33:00,360
Speaker 2: If you ever get fly kicked by a crack head,

620
00:33:02,360 --> 00:33:04,480
Speaker 2: Ellie's going to come in and save the day.

621
00:33:05,200 --> 00:33:05,400
Speaker 1: Now.

622
00:33:05,680 --> 00:33:07,680
Speaker 2: Just switching gears a little bit again, because that's what

623
00:33:07,760 --> 00:33:11,080
Speaker 2: I'm best at. Is there anything growing up like Matt

624
00:33:11,120 --> 00:33:13,720
Speaker 2: growing up that you've caught him out on that you've

625
00:33:13,760 --> 00:33:18,280
Speaker 2: actually never told him that you've found out about? Anything

626
00:33:18,320 --> 00:33:21,880
Speaker 2: that comes to mind? Big question? I know, dicover something.

627
00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:23,960
Speaker 1: We were pretty much an open book.

628
00:33:25,000 --> 00:33:29,080
Speaker 2: Look, there's always going to be something, right, whether she

629
00:33:29,160 --> 00:33:31,040
Speaker 2: remembers it now or down the track, and she texts

630
00:33:31,080 --> 00:33:32,800
Speaker 2: me later about what it is.

631
00:33:32,960 --> 00:33:39,120
Speaker 3: But you're quite honestly, nothing major comes to mind because.

632
00:33:38,840 --> 00:33:40,120
Speaker 1: I tell you everything anyway.

633
00:33:40,240 --> 00:33:44,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, we're very honest with each other. How well, Yes,

634
00:33:46,480 --> 00:33:48,440
Speaker 3: I don't know whether I should say yes she did,

635
00:33:48,920 --> 00:33:52,160
Speaker 3: go go go, but no names, no names.

636
00:33:52,880 --> 00:33:55,600
Speaker 2: There's one of these brothers, okay, who.

637
00:33:55,480 --> 00:33:59,880
Speaker 3: Went to Canada and asked me to send his drive

638
00:34:00,240 --> 00:34:03,120
Speaker 3: license to Canada for him. And I did that, and

639
00:34:03,200 --> 00:34:06,760
Speaker 3: I kept checking, has the license arrived because you're leaving soon?

640
00:34:06,920 --> 00:34:07,160
Speaker 1: No?

641
00:34:07,160 --> 00:34:11,399
Speaker 3: No, no, no, no, hadn't arrived, hadn't arrived. Eventually he

642
00:34:11,520 --> 00:34:15,239
Speaker 3: came home and a couple of weeks after that, this

643
00:34:16,000 --> 00:34:19,839
Speaker 3: package arrived, this envelope, and it was quite thick, and

644
00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:24,759
Speaker 3: I thought, ah, his his license. And I did something

645
00:34:25,280 --> 00:34:29,239
Speaker 3: that honestly I never would do. I thought it was

646
00:34:29,239 --> 00:34:32,719
Speaker 3: his license. I opened up the envelope and it was

647
00:34:32,760 --> 00:34:35,800
Speaker 3: a birthday card, and I opened your card.

648
00:34:35,920 --> 00:34:37,680
Speaker 1: No one's having a birthday in this household.

649
00:34:37,800 --> 00:34:40,840
Speaker 3: And as I opened the card, I saw about ten

650
00:34:41,320 --> 00:34:53,120
Speaker 3: little pouches of white So I drug bill. I'd closed

651
00:34:53,120 --> 00:34:55,920
Speaker 3: the envelope. I'd closed the card, put it back in

652
00:34:55,960 --> 00:34:59,200
Speaker 3: the envelope, put it on the hall stand, and didn't

653
00:34:59,200 --> 00:35:03,359
Speaker 3: know what to do. I thought, I think there could

654
00:35:03,400 --> 00:35:06,239
Speaker 3: be police just hovering outside the show.

655
00:35:06,320 --> 00:35:11,319
Speaker 2: So you've discovered that someone in the house is essentially

656
00:35:12,120 --> 00:35:14,239
Speaker 2: smuggling drugs into the house.

657
00:35:14,719 --> 00:35:17,400
Speaker 1: And it came home, the house is spotless, nine bags

658
00:35:17,400 --> 00:35:18,040
Speaker 1: were remaining.

659
00:35:20,719 --> 00:35:27,200
Speaker 2: And did you just not say anything like what really

660
00:35:27,239 --> 00:35:28,719
Speaker 2: incriminating this guy.

661
00:35:31,080 --> 00:35:36,520
Speaker 3: Anyway? He I didn't, Honestly, I did not know how

662
00:35:36,560 --> 00:35:37,399
Speaker 3: to handle that.

663
00:35:37,600 --> 00:35:40,400
Speaker 2: The Johnson family or the Jamelle Golby family.

664
00:35:41,440 --> 00:35:44,480
Speaker 3: So I just left it on the hall stand. Obviously

665
00:35:44,560 --> 00:35:49,640
Speaker 3: it had been opened to see what reaction went down

666
00:35:49,680 --> 00:35:51,000
Speaker 3: the toilet or anything.

667
00:35:51,400 --> 00:35:53,080
Speaker 2: Did you leave it there to see what the reaction

668
00:35:53,120 --> 00:35:57,439
Speaker 2: would be once? Yeah, yeah, so that he will remain nameless.

669
00:35:57,760 --> 00:36:02,359
Speaker 3: And he was very apologetic, and he was shocked that

670
00:36:02,520 --> 00:36:03,640
Speaker 3: I'd found out.

671
00:36:03,920 --> 00:36:05,040
Speaker 2: And it had come from Canada.

672
00:36:05,480 --> 00:36:07,600
Speaker 3: Wow, much cheaper in Canada, did you say?

673
00:36:07,840 --> 00:36:09,560
Speaker 2: Okay? So he was on the way home from Canada,

674
00:36:09,600 --> 00:36:11,680
Speaker 2: thought I'm going to get some sent home. So when

675
00:36:11,680 --> 00:36:12,560
Speaker 2: I go no, no, this.

676
00:36:12,640 --> 00:36:14,640
Speaker 3: Was this was sent he said by a friend.

677
00:36:14,920 --> 00:36:18,160
Speaker 2: Oh okay, right right right, Well there you did you

678
00:36:18,200 --> 00:36:18,520
Speaker 2: know that?

679
00:36:18,840 --> 00:36:19,000
Speaker 1: Yes?

680
00:36:19,360 --> 00:36:19,920
Speaker 2: You did know that.

681
00:36:20,040 --> 00:36:25,200
Speaker 1: Yes, I taught him how to do it, just to confirm.

682
00:36:24,680 --> 00:36:29,360
Speaker 2: It wasn't Matt. For those we have this segment called lies,

683
00:36:29,560 --> 00:36:33,200
Speaker 2: where we actively admit to lying to our kids, and

684
00:36:33,280 --> 00:36:36,279
Speaker 2: so does the listeners they send in. Are there any

685
00:36:36,320 --> 00:36:40,040
Speaker 2: lies that you remember telling Matt growing up, like any

686
00:36:40,120 --> 00:36:41,040
Speaker 2: parenting lies?

687
00:36:42,160 --> 00:36:46,280
Speaker 3: No, not with Matt, but there was one with Kate.

688
00:36:46,600 --> 00:36:48,759
Speaker 2: Does Kate know this lie? Is like it's a lie?

689
00:36:48,920 --> 00:36:51,640
Speaker 2: Or she probably know now, but you didn't actually say

690
00:36:51,640 --> 00:36:53,760
Speaker 2: you rememory She say that it was okay.

691
00:36:54,120 --> 00:36:56,239
Speaker 3: I haven't actively gone back to her and said, hey,

692
00:36:56,480 --> 00:36:57,719
Speaker 3: you know that question you are?

693
00:36:58,640 --> 00:36:59,840
Speaker 1: Is it about a dead pet?

694
00:37:01,160 --> 00:37:04,439
Speaker 3: I don't know. It's much worse. Please, Ka don't want

695
00:37:04,520 --> 00:37:05,080
Speaker 3: to hear this.

696
00:37:06,200 --> 00:37:06,640
Speaker 2: Yes we do.

697
00:37:07,360 --> 00:37:11,160
Speaker 3: Kate was about fourteen, just getting to know about sex

698
00:37:11,320 --> 00:37:16,080
Speaker 3: and explaining to her, trying to be honest. She was

699
00:37:16,120 --> 00:37:18,239
Speaker 3: taking it all in and there was this book that

700
00:37:18,320 --> 00:37:23,440
Speaker 3: she were going through together, and she thought for a

701
00:37:23,520 --> 00:37:29,720
Speaker 3: while and said, Mom, have you ever had oral sex?

702
00:37:30,680 --> 00:37:31,960
Speaker 1: Oh? My dear goodness.

703
00:37:32,120 --> 00:37:38,080
Speaker 3: And at that moment everything be honest with your children.

704
00:37:38,920 --> 00:37:42,800
Speaker 3: And I looked at her and I said, no, darling.

705
00:37:45,320 --> 00:37:47,000
Speaker 1: See mom is actually a cock monster.

706
00:37:49,600 --> 00:37:52,680
Speaker 3: I can't I can't see that could go to air

707
00:37:52,840 --> 00:37:54,400
Speaker 3: because Kate would disown me.

708
00:37:55,719 --> 00:37:59,880
Speaker 2: Kate, but your mom has had oral sex before?

709
00:38:01,360 --> 00:38:03,120
Speaker 1: I hate right now listening to the podcast.

710
00:38:04,160 --> 00:38:11,360
Speaker 3: No. There was another funny anecdote. We were in Wales

711
00:38:11,760 --> 00:38:15,080
Speaker 3: visiting my mother, their grandmother, small bathroom. Were all in

712
00:38:15,120 --> 00:38:19,160
Speaker 3: the bathroom together and Kate went to the toilet and

713
00:38:19,239 --> 00:38:25,200
Speaker 3: Adam looked and he said, where's Kate's penis? And I said, well,

714
00:38:25,280 --> 00:38:28,440
Speaker 3: she doesn't have a penis, and he said, oh, well,

715
00:38:28,480 --> 00:38:32,120
Speaker 3: what does she have? He was about seven, And I thought,

716
00:38:32,160 --> 00:38:36,600
Speaker 3: for a split second, I will call it what it is,

717
00:38:37,239 --> 00:38:40,560
Speaker 3: so I said, she has a vagina. And he looked,

718
00:38:40,560 --> 00:38:42,919
Speaker 3: and he nodded and went out. Didn't repeat the word.

719
00:38:43,480 --> 00:38:47,880
Speaker 3: That afternoon, off we went to the local park, absolutely

720
00:38:48,040 --> 00:38:52,279
Speaker 3: full of picnickers, and these three teenage girls befriended us

721
00:38:52,360 --> 00:38:55,879
Speaker 3: and they played with you, and they were great then

722
00:38:55,960 --> 00:38:58,800
Speaker 3: the time came for them to leave, and I said,

723
00:38:58,840 --> 00:39:01,680
Speaker 3: say say goodbye of the girls, and one of the

724
00:39:01,719 --> 00:39:08,520
Speaker 3: girls was called Virginia. So Adamnan in his loudest voice

725
00:39:08,600 --> 00:39:18,560
Speaker 3: saying see ya Vagina. You could feel all these picnicers

726
00:39:18,640 --> 00:39:19,800
Speaker 3: or little children going.

727
00:39:19,760 --> 00:39:24,160
Speaker 2: Oh God, that's one of those things where it's like

728
00:39:24,280 --> 00:39:25,520
Speaker 2: just the kid just doesn't know.

729
00:39:26,000 --> 00:39:28,399
Speaker 3: And it was that was honesty that did not pay.

730
00:39:30,880 --> 00:39:32,720
Speaker 1: I don't know if there's an answer to this question.

731
00:39:32,800 --> 00:39:35,200
Speaker 1: So if there's not, it's totally fine. And I'm going

732
00:39:35,239 --> 00:39:37,480
Speaker 1: to put you on the spot here when you look

733
00:39:37,600 --> 00:39:41,399
Speaker 1: back at the years of parenting with all of us,

734
00:39:41,440 --> 00:39:44,719
Speaker 1: maybe it's just me any mistakes that you made, do.

735
00:39:44,719 --> 00:39:48,280
Speaker 3: You know what? I think? Parenting is honestly the hardest

736
00:39:48,360 --> 00:39:53,080
Speaker 3: job you will ever do. There are no guidelines because

737
00:39:53,280 --> 00:39:57,120
Speaker 3: each child is so different. So if you feel you

738
00:39:57,280 --> 00:40:02,120
Speaker 3: have got through parenting without making mistakes, you are delusional.

739
00:40:02,920 --> 00:40:08,240
Speaker 3: We all will make mistakes, hopefully some on the smaller

740
00:40:08,360 --> 00:40:12,440
Speaker 3: side rather than But yes, I've made mistakes, and I

741
00:40:12,480 --> 00:40:15,799
Speaker 3: don't have to go into exactly what they were. But

742
00:40:15,920 --> 00:40:20,120
Speaker 3: something was sent to me that was one particular thing

743
00:40:20,200 --> 00:40:22,920
Speaker 3: that I have regretted, and it was getting to me.

744
00:40:24,000 --> 00:40:28,920
Speaker 3: And there's a Buddhist saying that when you make a mistake,

745
00:40:29,400 --> 00:40:34,400
Speaker 3: it is a life lesson, not a life sentence.

746
00:40:34,960 --> 00:40:41,280
Speaker 1: Unless it's murder, yes, or drug trafficking. I agree.

747
00:40:41,280 --> 00:40:45,319
Speaker 3: I'm to say that we all of us have the

748
00:40:45,400 --> 00:40:49,919
Speaker 3: potential to relieve that moment, to beat ourselves up over it.

749
00:40:50,440 --> 00:40:54,239
Speaker 3: And when I saw that, I thought, yeah, it's not

750
00:40:54,320 --> 00:40:57,440
Speaker 3: a life sentence. You've got to learn from it and

751
00:40:57,480 --> 00:40:58,080
Speaker 3: then move on.

752
00:40:58,560 --> 00:41:01,399
Speaker 2: And as we all know, the whole nation knows, Matt

753
00:41:01,560 --> 00:41:02,440
Speaker 2: was the Bachelor.

754
00:41:02,719 --> 00:41:03,439
Speaker 1: Oh what was he?

755
00:41:03,840 --> 00:41:06,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, he was also on the Bachelorette, but we'll skip

756
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:09,120
Speaker 2: that part because I don't want to see him cry again.

757
00:41:10,680 --> 00:41:16,400
Speaker 2: Oh I'm sorry. What were your initial thoughts? Not every

758
00:41:16,440 --> 00:41:18,960
Speaker 2: mom can say my you know, my son was on

759
00:41:19,040 --> 00:41:22,799
Speaker 2: reality TV? What was your initial thoughts on that?

760
00:41:23,400 --> 00:41:28,000
Speaker 3: Okay? When I remember distangly the conversation phone me and

761
00:41:28,080 --> 00:41:31,719
Speaker 3: he said, applied for this and there's auditions, and I

762
00:41:31,880 --> 00:41:35,520
Speaker 3: was not a fan of reality television. And I remember saying,

763
00:41:36,120 --> 00:41:38,080
Speaker 3: you really really want.

764
00:41:37,920 --> 00:41:38,359
Speaker 2: To do this?

765
00:41:39,120 --> 00:41:41,600
Speaker 3: He said yeah, yeah, it'll be a bit of fun, yeah,

766
00:41:42,120 --> 00:41:47,000
Speaker 3: in between jobs, and I went, oh, okay. And then

767
00:41:47,160 --> 00:41:51,040
Speaker 3: a little while later you must have told Kate, and

768
00:41:51,160 --> 00:41:54,480
Speaker 3: Kate and I were both saying, what the hell is

769
00:41:54,600 --> 00:41:55,320
Speaker 3: he doing?

770
00:41:56,680 --> 00:42:00,000
Speaker 2: But no, you know, obviously went well, we got two kids.

771
00:42:00,280 --> 00:42:03,600
Speaker 3: I mean, if I'd been asked to place money on

772
00:42:03,640 --> 00:42:05,680
Speaker 3: a bed, I would have thought, no, this isn't going

773
00:42:05,760 --> 00:42:12,839
Speaker 3: to work. And that's probably been the biggest shock. Yeah,

774
00:42:12,840 --> 00:42:16,880
Speaker 3: but it didn't just work. It brought two people together

775
00:42:17,280 --> 00:42:22,799
Speaker 3: who should be together. And Laura is my daughter, my

776
00:42:22,960 --> 00:42:26,840
Speaker 3: second daughter. And the weird thing is it was weird

777
00:42:27,320 --> 00:42:32,640
Speaker 3: going to Thailand, never having met two girls Elise and Laura,

778
00:42:32,840 --> 00:42:36,120
Speaker 3: I had to interview. That should have been super weird,

779
00:42:36,600 --> 00:42:44,720
Speaker 3: shouldn't it weird? These girls who are vying for Matt's attention.

780
00:42:44,640 --> 00:42:46,719
Speaker 2: Try not to tell them about the six skin.

781
00:42:49,880 --> 00:42:52,600
Speaker 3: But they were both of those girls who were lovely.

782
00:42:53,280 --> 00:42:58,000
Speaker 3: But when Laura and I sat down, and it sounds corny,

783
00:42:58,160 --> 00:43:00,640
Speaker 3: but it was as if I'd known her for years,

784
00:43:01,040 --> 00:43:02,640
Speaker 3: it was the most beautiful thing.

785
00:43:03,160 --> 00:43:07,359
Speaker 2: And imagine if you chose the other one after that, Yeah, yeah,

786
00:43:07,440 --> 00:43:09,960
Speaker 2: yeah that or did the honey badger and just took off.

787
00:43:10,160 --> 00:43:14,120
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, you and Laura do have a really great relationship,

788
00:43:14,120 --> 00:43:16,680
Speaker 1: and I do, and I feel bad for other people

789
00:43:16,719 --> 00:43:19,000
Speaker 1: out there who don't have great relationships with their mother

790
00:43:19,080 --> 00:43:22,720
Speaker 1: in laws. But would you have any advice for maybe

791
00:43:22,760 --> 00:43:25,040
Speaker 1: if there's any women out there who will down the

792
00:43:25,080 --> 00:43:27,120
Speaker 1: line become a mother in law, how can they have

793
00:43:27,239 --> 00:43:29,520
Speaker 1: a good relationship with their child's partner.

794
00:43:30,360 --> 00:43:35,080
Speaker 3: Wow, that's an impossible question because there are so many layers.

795
00:43:35,520 --> 00:43:38,880
Speaker 3: First of all, like we all know, with friendships, you've

796
00:43:39,160 --> 00:43:42,480
Speaker 3: just got to gel and sometimes you meet them for

797
00:43:42,520 --> 00:43:46,240
Speaker 3: the first time and there's common interest and it's easy.

798
00:43:46,800 --> 00:43:49,400
Speaker 3: And with your mother in law, I think the one

799
00:43:49,520 --> 00:43:56,239
Speaker 3: thing never to criticize her son. It would be very

800
00:43:56,280 --> 00:43:59,239
Speaker 3: easy once you get to know them really well. You know,

801
00:43:59,320 --> 00:44:03,800
Speaker 3: you go, gosh, she does no because in her eyes

802
00:44:03,960 --> 00:44:09,719
Speaker 3: you're criticizing her. Yes, Yeah, good advice and I'm going.

803
00:44:10,760 --> 00:44:12,560
Speaker 2: Doesn't say a bad word about me again.

804
00:44:14,440 --> 00:44:15,040
Speaker 1: Yeah.

805
00:44:15,320 --> 00:44:19,800
Speaker 3: Try to look at your own little boy or daughter

806
00:44:20,200 --> 00:44:24,160
Speaker 3: and imagine that one day someone is going to be

807
00:44:24,280 --> 00:44:27,879
Speaker 3: more important in their lives than you are, and how

808
00:44:27,960 --> 00:44:28,760
Speaker 3: you would feel.

809
00:44:28,960 --> 00:44:32,360
Speaker 1: I think that's it's difficult for some mums to accept.

810
00:44:32,040 --> 00:44:35,240
Speaker 2: And let go. Yeah, because there's there's always those cringy

811
00:44:35,280 --> 00:44:37,480
Speaker 2: things on the line where it's just like your mum's

812
00:44:37,480 --> 00:44:40,040
Speaker 2: your first love. It's like that's a bit much.

813
00:44:41,719 --> 00:44:44,520
Speaker 1: You know what I mean, just a little bit too much,

814
00:44:45,000 --> 00:44:48,880
Speaker 1: Like I think it's maybe easier. Maybe tell me if

815
00:44:48,920 --> 00:44:51,560
Speaker 1: this is wrong. When you have five kids, you kind

816
00:44:51,560 --> 00:44:52,719
Speaker 1: of you are happy for them.

817
00:44:54,719 --> 00:44:57,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, if you got one boy, if you got one child, one.

818
00:44:57,760 --> 00:45:01,160
Speaker 1: Boy, three in the way, all still single.

819
00:45:01,400 --> 00:45:04,120
Speaker 2: If anyone if anyone's looking for a drug meal or

820
00:45:07,800 --> 00:45:12,520
Speaker 2: just reached out to Math's mom, I think, look solid advice,

821
00:45:12,680 --> 00:45:14,920
Speaker 2: and look, my mom and my wife get on. I

822
00:45:14,960 --> 00:45:17,480
Speaker 2: get on with my wife's mom. There's no you know,

823
00:45:17,520 --> 00:45:20,040
Speaker 2: we're pretty open and pretty yeah, but you can imagine

824
00:45:20,040 --> 00:45:22,279
Speaker 2: that there's somehow the that justa and you see it.

825
00:45:22,280 --> 00:45:24,600
Speaker 2: They made a reality TV show about that as well.

826
00:45:25,160 --> 00:45:27,200
Speaker 2: I remember when I said to my mom, what if

827
00:45:27,239 --> 00:45:29,640
Speaker 2: I was on Big Brother? And my mum straight said,

828
00:45:29,680 --> 00:45:32,920
Speaker 2: I disown you what that was. That's what came out

829
00:45:32,920 --> 00:45:34,759
Speaker 2: of her mouth before I even told her that I

830
00:45:34,840 --> 00:45:38,640
Speaker 2: was through these stages. And I was like, that's fine

831
00:45:38,640 --> 00:45:44,239
Speaker 2: with me. But yeah, so you're very accepting of that,

832
00:45:44,280 --> 00:45:44,919
Speaker 2: which is.

833
00:45:45,120 --> 00:45:47,560
Speaker 3: But I think you have to support your kid.

834
00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:48,000
Speaker 2: Yeah.

835
00:45:48,040 --> 00:45:52,200
Speaker 3: I think whatever direction apart from drug meal, yeah, in

836
00:45:52,280 --> 00:45:53,880
Speaker 3: ever direction they're going, yeah you go.

837
00:45:54,000 --> 00:45:56,360
Speaker 2: Yeah. I think when I eventually was like this is

838
00:45:56,360 --> 00:45:58,520
Speaker 2: where I'm actually just had to be like, oh, shit,

839
00:45:58,719 --> 00:46:01,200
Speaker 2: I can't go. Am I going to go back on

840
00:46:01,200 --> 00:46:02,799
Speaker 2: my word that I will disown you? It's like, well,

841
00:46:02,800 --> 00:46:07,200
Speaker 2: that's your problem. One final question from me Matt's crocs.

842
00:46:08,280 --> 00:46:09,760
Speaker 2: What are your thoughts on crocs?

843
00:46:10,520 --> 00:46:10,840
Speaker 1: Well?

844
00:46:12,120 --> 00:46:15,439
Speaker 3: I don't wear them, but people can. It's the sort

845
00:46:15,480 --> 00:46:20,600
Speaker 3: of thing no people can, but you know, they either

846
00:46:20,680 --> 00:46:23,160
Speaker 3: look silly on you, and it looks really silly on

847
00:46:23,200 --> 00:46:25,879
Speaker 3: me because maybe I'm little, but I don't mind them.

848
00:46:26,920 --> 00:46:27,640
Speaker 1: Let's leave it at that.

849
00:46:28,960 --> 00:46:30,040
Speaker 3: I want to say one thing.

850
00:46:30,040 --> 00:46:32,279
Speaker 1: Okay, well hang on before you get into that. A

851
00:46:32,320 --> 00:46:36,800
Speaker 1: lot of people actually asked your beauty. Oh yeah, because

852
00:46:37,120 --> 00:46:38,719
Speaker 1: you're seventy three. You look amazing.

853
00:46:38,920 --> 00:46:41,040
Speaker 2: You don't have to tell me twice Matthew.

854
00:46:40,920 --> 00:46:44,360
Speaker 3: One, shit, how dare you?

855
00:46:44,360 --> 00:46:47,759
Speaker 1: You're eighty five and you look great. I look at

856
00:46:47,800 --> 00:46:51,000
Speaker 1: your seventy one. I've been telling everyone your seventy three.

857
00:46:51,080 --> 00:46:54,000
Speaker 2: So apologies, yeah, apologies, yeah, Look that's not on.

858
00:46:54,200 --> 00:46:55,719
Speaker 1: What is your beauty secrets?

859
00:46:55,880 --> 00:46:56,240
Speaker 2: Ellie?

860
00:46:56,760 --> 00:47:05,400
Speaker 3: Look a little bit of everything except not the spurm

861
00:47:05,440 --> 00:47:08,040
Speaker 3: on the face. You've heard about it, not yet anyway,

862
00:47:11,640 --> 00:47:18,759
Speaker 3: not doing that. Look, I find this question just a

863
00:47:18,840 --> 00:47:23,279
Speaker 3: tad embarrassing really, because you.

864
00:47:23,200 --> 00:47:24,280
Speaker 2: Just take care of yourself.

865
00:47:24,520 --> 00:47:26,600
Speaker 3: I do you know, Yeah, I suppose I take care

866
00:47:26,640 --> 00:47:27,200
Speaker 3: of myself.

867
00:47:27,239 --> 00:47:29,239
Speaker 2: I do something wrong with saying that I take care

868
00:47:29,239 --> 00:47:31,480
Speaker 2: of yourself. I take care of myself. As you can see,

869
00:47:31,719 --> 00:47:33,319
Speaker 2: I'm actually fifty five.

870
00:47:35,560 --> 00:47:38,160
Speaker 1: How about with Marley and Lola, what traits do you

871
00:47:38,200 --> 00:47:40,680
Speaker 1: see in them which you think they've gotten from me?

872
00:47:41,400 --> 00:47:46,480
Speaker 3: Okay, it's still hard when they're this young, but I

873
00:47:46,520 --> 00:47:50,399
Speaker 3: certainly see and I see Marley, who physically looks more

874
00:47:50,480 --> 00:47:55,960
Speaker 3: like you, and Lola, who physically looks more like Laura. However,

875
00:47:56,120 --> 00:48:01,359
Speaker 3: Marley has the artistic bent. I mean, it's obvious. She's

876
00:48:01,560 --> 00:48:02,360
Speaker 3: very artistic.

877
00:48:02,400 --> 00:48:06,239
Speaker 2: She's really clever, She's like little Laura. Yeah. When I

878
00:48:07,680 --> 00:48:10,359
Speaker 2: when I met Marley before I met Laura, and then

879
00:48:10,640 --> 00:48:13,759
Speaker 2: so i'd met Marley and how like she's really intelligent

880
00:48:13,800 --> 00:48:15,680
Speaker 2: and even the way she kind of carries herself. And

881
00:48:15,680 --> 00:48:17,960
Speaker 2: then I met Laura went, ah, yeah, that's where it

882
00:48:17,960 --> 00:48:18,399
Speaker 2: comes from.

883
00:48:19,040 --> 00:48:22,560
Speaker 3: So that's something that is from Laura. But the other

884
00:48:22,600 --> 00:48:25,799
Speaker 3: thing I noticed, Matt being the middle child, it was

885
00:48:25,840 --> 00:48:27,759
Speaker 3: always look at me, look at me, look at me.

886
00:48:28,000 --> 00:48:30,960
Speaker 1: He still like that, look at me.

887
00:48:31,680 --> 00:48:34,640
Speaker 3: That's why he went into drama and film and television

888
00:48:34,719 --> 00:48:37,640
Speaker 3: courses and did that. But I'm beginning to see a

889
00:48:37,640 --> 00:48:40,320
Speaker 3: little bit of that in Marley. I mean maybe both

890
00:48:40,360 --> 00:48:43,920
Speaker 3: of them. But Marley, if you start to film her,

891
00:48:44,480 --> 00:48:47,640
Speaker 3: she will change. She'll really respond.

892
00:48:47,760 --> 00:48:50,520
Speaker 2: Yeah. I saw that video of her doing the singing

893
00:48:50,560 --> 00:48:52,600
Speaker 2: to you guys with the hairbrush.

894
00:48:52,680 --> 00:48:53,720
Speaker 1: She loves a little concert.

895
00:48:53,920 --> 00:48:54,280
Speaker 2: Yeah.

896
00:48:54,560 --> 00:48:57,480
Speaker 3: Because Matt, I have to say, am I correct in saying? Matt?

897
00:48:57,840 --> 00:49:03,040
Speaker 3: You're not artistically art wise creative? You don't draw.

898
00:49:04,680 --> 00:49:09,040
Speaker 2: Wait, you're not perfect, you are, but you are creative.

899
00:49:09,800 --> 00:49:11,560
Speaker 1: I like to I like to draw. When I was younger,

900
00:49:11,719 --> 00:49:14,279
Speaker 1: I really enjoyed drawing. I don't draw up much anymore,

901
00:49:14,520 --> 00:49:17,040
Speaker 1: but I still like, you know, I love coming up

902
00:49:17,080 --> 00:49:18,640
Speaker 1: with skip video ideas.

903
00:49:18,800 --> 00:49:22,239
Speaker 3: Now that's where you're creative, lies coming up.

904
00:49:22,440 --> 00:49:25,880
Speaker 2: You've got a good your ideas man. I'm the creative

905
00:49:25,920 --> 00:49:27,359
Speaker 2: director and you're the ideas man.

906
00:49:28,360 --> 00:49:33,600
Speaker 3: But your natural trait all through has been humor. You

907
00:49:33,840 --> 00:49:39,600
Speaker 3: have been our entertainment at home, quick with with comebacks,

908
00:49:40,280 --> 00:49:45,080
Speaker 3: make any situation funny. And I'm thinking that even Lola

909
00:49:45,280 --> 00:49:49,520
Speaker 3: physically looks like Laura, Yeah she does, but I think

910
00:49:49,719 --> 00:49:54,320
Speaker 3: she's going to be the funny one. I think Molly

911
00:49:54,480 --> 00:49:57,400
Speaker 3: is a little more even though she loves the entertaining,

912
00:49:57,400 --> 00:50:00,759
Speaker 3: but a little bit more serious. But then they change.

913
00:50:01,040 --> 00:50:04,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, I guess Laura and I are so similar in

914
00:50:04,239 --> 00:50:08,000
Speaker 1: personality times, but also in looks as well. Yeah. Literally,

915
00:50:08,040 --> 00:50:09,719
Speaker 1: people are like are they siblings? Are they?

916
00:50:09,840 --> 00:50:12,279
Speaker 2: It's funny like the two girls, because the other day

917
00:50:12,280 --> 00:50:14,000
Speaker 2: when I rang you and it like we're both having

918
00:50:14,000 --> 00:50:17,480
Speaker 2: a shit morning, and Marley's like the very distinct differences

919
00:50:17,480 --> 00:50:20,279
Speaker 2: in your two kids. Marley's like ash like over look,

920
00:50:20,360 --> 00:50:22,799
Speaker 2: I can click, and she's taking and all I can

921
00:50:22,840 --> 00:50:27,719
Speaker 2: hear in the background is Lola going, And it was

922
00:50:27,760 --> 00:50:29,960
Speaker 2: like that sums them up. Sometimes Lola is a little

923
00:50:30,000 --> 00:50:32,440
Speaker 2: bit more like crazy what I see. But then Marley's

924
00:50:32,480 --> 00:50:35,320
Speaker 2: like every time I've spoken to Marley's just like quiet,

925
00:50:35,760 --> 00:50:38,840
Speaker 2: knows what she's saying and like really articulate with it.

926
00:50:38,960 --> 00:50:40,680
Speaker 2: And when she's like, look, I can click, it was

927
00:50:40,760 --> 00:50:43,000
Speaker 2: just like I was having a conversation with someone, not

928
00:50:43,040 --> 00:50:43,759
Speaker 2: a four year old.

929
00:50:43,840 --> 00:50:46,200
Speaker 3: She clicks, Well, yeah, amazing.

930
00:50:46,000 --> 00:50:47,800
Speaker 2: She's good. You put the thing is, I've got a

931
00:50:47,800 --> 00:50:50,799
Speaker 2: four year old two. You put those two together, and

932
00:50:50,960 --> 00:50:54,080
Speaker 2: Marley's way ahead of Oscar. And when we thought, like Oscars,

933
00:50:54,080 --> 00:50:56,719
Speaker 2: you got a cabillary is amazing, But like put in

934
00:50:56,760 --> 00:50:59,360
Speaker 2: next someone like a girl the same age. Yeah, yeah,

935
00:50:59,480 --> 00:50:59,960
Speaker 2: very different.

936
00:51:00,120 --> 00:51:03,439
Speaker 1: Yeah, a question that we got, like so many of them.

937
00:51:03,560 --> 00:51:05,920
Speaker 1: They're all about how do you still have a good

938
00:51:05,960 --> 00:51:09,200
Speaker 1: relationship with your parent as an adult. And I think

939
00:51:09,200 --> 00:51:11,759
Speaker 1: it's a really tough one to answer because we've been

940
00:51:11,800 --> 00:51:16,359
Speaker 1: really fortunate that we've always just been really close. I think,

941
00:51:16,480 --> 00:51:19,000
Speaker 1: obviously you love your child and you love your parent,

942
00:51:19,280 --> 00:51:21,239
Speaker 1: but then whether or not you like each other and

943
00:51:21,280 --> 00:51:23,680
Speaker 1: you have a good friendship in addition to having that

944
00:51:24,160 --> 00:51:26,759
Speaker 1: parental love is a different thing. And we've always been

945
00:51:26,800 --> 00:51:29,719
Speaker 1: super fortunate that, you know, from a really early age,

946
00:51:29,760 --> 00:51:33,600
Speaker 1: Like you talk about me not really being too naughty,

947
00:51:34,200 --> 00:51:37,640
Speaker 1: and I wholeheartedly mean this. When whenever there was a scenario,

948
00:51:38,200 --> 00:51:40,440
Speaker 1: you know, when I did get in trouble, or if

949
00:51:40,440 --> 00:51:42,919
Speaker 1: there was a situation where I if I had done

950
00:51:42,920 --> 00:51:44,480
Speaker 1: a certain thing, I could have gotten in a lot

951
00:51:44,520 --> 00:51:46,960
Speaker 1: of trouble. One of the reasons that I didn't do

952
00:51:47,000 --> 00:51:49,680
Speaker 1: that is because I never wanted to disappoint you more

953
00:51:49,719 --> 00:51:51,279
Speaker 1: so than like, would I actually get in trouble for this?

954
00:51:51,360 --> 00:51:53,080
Speaker 1: It would always be a question of, like, with this,

955
00:51:53,120 --> 00:51:55,840
Speaker 1: disappoint mum. And that's why I think you didn't have

956
00:51:55,920 --> 00:51:59,719
Speaker 1: to keep us on a really tight leash, and then

957
00:52:00,000 --> 00:52:03,560
Speaker 1: what kind of closeness is just carried on through Like

958
00:52:03,600 --> 00:52:06,840
Speaker 1: you've always been like my confidant, Like any situation or advice,

959
00:52:07,440 --> 00:52:09,880
Speaker 1: I've always like gone off. I don't ask mum's opinion,

960
00:52:09,920 --> 00:52:12,080
Speaker 1: Like even though with Bachelor you're the first person that

961
00:52:12,120 --> 00:52:12,719
Speaker 1: I called up.

962
00:52:12,840 --> 00:52:17,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's nice that you feel that my opinion is valid.

963
00:52:17,880 --> 00:52:20,920
Speaker 3: But I do think a few people have asked, you know,

964
00:52:21,040 --> 00:52:24,600
Speaker 3: how to how do you get close to your children?

965
00:52:25,120 --> 00:52:28,720
Speaker 3: And again there's so many layers. One layer is luck

966
00:52:29,960 --> 00:52:34,799
Speaker 3: that you just click. The other layer is time that

967
00:52:34,920 --> 00:52:37,840
Speaker 3: you make sure that you give a huge amount of

968
00:52:37,880 --> 00:52:40,200
Speaker 3: time to your children, that you always try to be

969
00:52:40,400 --> 00:52:44,400
Speaker 3: there when they need you. And that maybe leads on

970
00:52:44,680 --> 00:52:51,839
Speaker 3: to the issue of another partner in your life. And

971
00:52:51,920 --> 00:52:56,040
Speaker 3: I see that a lot in friends who've introduced a partner.

972
00:52:56,440 --> 00:53:01,600
Speaker 3: That is a rocky road. Whether you are blending family

973
00:53:01,680 --> 00:53:06,880
Speaker 3: with young children, with teenagers and even adults, it's very

974
00:53:06,920 --> 00:53:10,799
Speaker 3: hard to make everybody happy where there's a new individual.

975
00:53:10,960 --> 00:53:14,560
Speaker 3: It's very very difficult. And I've come to the I

976
00:53:14,600 --> 00:53:18,520
Speaker 3: say to people when they're having difficulty with step children

977
00:53:18,600 --> 00:53:22,520
Speaker 3: who are adults, and when you introduce another person into

978
00:53:22,560 --> 00:53:26,719
Speaker 3: the family. You've got to imagine that your thirty one

979
00:53:26,840 --> 00:53:30,200
Speaker 3: year old kid is actually ten years old, because that's

980
00:53:30,239 --> 00:53:33,879
Speaker 3: how they're feeling. When you bring a new person into

981
00:53:33,960 --> 00:53:37,680
Speaker 3: the family area, it's a very very different dynam the

982
00:53:37,880 --> 00:53:42,200
Speaker 3: energy you need to look after kids, to go to work,

983
00:53:42,320 --> 00:53:45,400
Speaker 3: and then to try to find a partner. That's very hard,

984
00:53:45,440 --> 00:53:49,320
Speaker 3: and I feel very fortunate that I didn't feel that need.

985
00:53:50,080 --> 00:53:52,000
Speaker 3: And it sounds a little bit, oh, you know, I

986
00:53:52,040 --> 00:53:55,359
Speaker 3: sacrificed myself to my children. I don't see it that

987
00:53:55,440 --> 00:54:01,560
Speaker 3: way some people might, but I really took in giving

988
00:54:01,640 --> 00:54:05,080
Speaker 3: my time to you and to my job. I think

989
00:54:05,120 --> 00:54:07,000
Speaker 3: that's helped us, do you think.

990
00:54:06,800 --> 00:54:08,600
Speaker 1: Man, Yeah, yeah, I do, you know.

991
00:54:08,640 --> 00:54:13,520
Speaker 3: And I I don't regret it, because my greatest achievement

992
00:54:13,920 --> 00:54:17,920
Speaker 3: in my life if I had been the first female

993
00:54:18,040 --> 00:54:20,560
Speaker 3: astronaut to land on the Moon, I can tell you

994
00:54:20,640 --> 00:54:25,759
Speaker 3: now that my biggest achievement in life has been my

995
00:54:25,880 --> 00:54:29,040
Speaker 3: children and grandchildren. And I know it's hard. People out

996
00:54:29,040 --> 00:54:31,479
Speaker 3: there will say yes, but I deserve a life too,

997
00:54:31,840 --> 00:54:34,840
Speaker 3: and I get that, so it's a tricky one, but

998
00:54:34,960 --> 00:54:38,480
Speaker 3: I just feel grateful that I didn't have that need.

999
00:54:39,560 --> 00:54:42,400
Speaker 3: But I do remember Matt once saying to me, but

1000
00:54:42,920 --> 00:54:46,640
Speaker 3: aren't there times when you really want a big fat cop.

1001
00:54:50,920 --> 00:54:52,600
Speaker 2: And that's a really, really good place.

1002
00:54:52,800 --> 00:54:56,800
Speaker 1: And your answer to that question was heck, yeah, you

1003
00:54:56,920 --> 00:54:57,600
Speaker 1: know what the.

1004
00:54:57,600 --> 00:55:02,200
Speaker 3: Answer was, how do you know I'm not getting oh shit?

1005
00:55:02,840 --> 00:55:06,880
Speaker 2: Okay, Well, look, I'm super excited to have you on

1006
00:55:06,920 --> 00:55:09,800
Speaker 2: the podcast and thank you so much and answering our questions,

1007
00:55:09,840 --> 00:55:11,320
Speaker 2: especially the forskin questions.

1008
00:55:12,080 --> 00:55:14,319
Speaker 1: It would be remiss of me not to take the

1009
00:55:14,360 --> 00:55:19,040
Speaker 1: opportunity to say thank you as a son, because I

1010
00:55:19,120 --> 00:55:21,359
Speaker 1: think you talk about luck and you talk about how

1011
00:55:21,440 --> 00:55:24,600
Speaker 1: fortunate you are to be given the children that you've

1012
00:55:24,600 --> 00:55:27,880
Speaker 1: been gifted, But at the same time, I'm so insanely

1013
00:55:27,920 --> 00:55:30,759
Speaker 1: lucky that I've been given you as a as a parent.

1014
00:55:30,800 --> 00:55:33,600
Speaker 1: I'm probably gonna cry when I talk about this. Sorry,

1015
00:55:33,840 --> 00:55:35,360
Speaker 1: I just can leave the room, no, but I just

1016
00:55:35,360 --> 00:55:37,879
Speaker 1: want to say, you know, the only reason why I

1017
00:55:37,920 --> 00:55:40,040
Speaker 1: am who I am today is because of you. Know,

1018
00:55:40,080 --> 00:55:42,560
Speaker 1: what you have given me and what you've encouraged me

1019
00:55:42,920 --> 00:55:45,920
Speaker 1: to take on and the past I've traveled. So you know,

1020
00:55:45,920 --> 00:55:48,400
Speaker 1: I'm only sitting here because of what I feel you

1021
00:55:48,400 --> 00:55:50,080
Speaker 1: have given me and how you have parented me. So

1022
00:55:50,120 --> 00:55:52,600
Speaker 1: you've done such an amazing job. I love you very much.

1023
00:55:52,680 --> 00:55:53,440
Speaker 3: I love you.

1024
00:55:53,800 --> 00:55:57,440
Speaker 2: Wow, this is very sweet. I feel like I'm third willing,

1025
00:55:58,440 --> 00:56:01,200
Speaker 2: But Matthew, thank you for me very vulnerable in that moment.

1026
00:56:01,239 --> 00:56:02,560
Speaker 2: I'm not rolling my ears at you at all.

1027
00:56:03,239 --> 00:56:05,600
Speaker 1: Well, Ellie, thank you so much for jumping on the podcast,

1028
00:56:06,080 --> 00:56:08,320
Speaker 1: putting up with Ash and myself for this. God, you

1029
00:56:08,360 --> 00:56:09,040
Speaker 1: did a great job.

1030
00:56:09,120 --> 00:56:10,719
Speaker 3: I won't charge too much.

1031
00:56:10,880 --> 00:56:13,480
Speaker 2: No good you need voice Me's It'll be in the.

1032
00:56:13,480 --> 00:56:14,279
Speaker 3: Mail, I'm sure.

1033
00:56:14,920 --> 00:56:18,839
Speaker 1: Normally at the end we ask people to review subscribe,

1034
00:56:19,360 --> 00:56:22,279
Speaker 1: leaves a number of stars. If you'd like to, you

1035
00:56:22,280 --> 00:56:23,640
Speaker 1: can encourage them to do the same.

1036
00:56:24,080 --> 00:56:28,160
Speaker 3: Don't forget to review and subscribe.

1037
00:56:28,320 --> 00:56:30,640
Speaker 2: Yes, if you've liked this episode, As Ellie said, don't

1038
00:56:30,640 --> 00:56:34,760
Speaker 2: forget to review and subscribe. Also follow us on Instagram.

1039
00:56:34,960 --> 00:56:37,680
Speaker 2: Maybe we'll get one of my parents on sometime within

1040
00:56:37,719 --> 00:56:42,799
Speaker 2: your future. I hope not. Maybe Dad, Maybe I don't

1041
00:56:42,800 --> 00:56:45,840
Speaker 2: think Mum would be booking. But anyway, thank you again

1042
00:56:46,040 --> 00:56:48,520
Speaker 2: and thank you everyone for listening. That's all a good

1043
00:56:48,520 --> 00:56:48,920
Speaker 2: time for.

1044
00:56:58,640 --> 00:57:02,240
Speaker 1: Two Doting Dad's podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country

1045
00:57:02,280 --> 00:57:05,960
Speaker 1: throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community.

1046
00:57:06,200 --> 00:57:08,720
Speaker 2: We pay our respects to their elders past and present,

1047
00:57:08,760 --> 00:57:11,880
Speaker 2: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestrate Islander

1048
00:57:11,920 --> 00:57:15,560
Speaker 2: peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land.