Speaker 1: She's on the Money.
Speaker 2: She's on the Money.
Speaker 3: Hello, and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast
Speaker 3: Millennials who want financial freedom. Welcome to another shot back
Speaker 3: money Diary Monday, where we get to talk to one
Speaker 3: about gorgeous community members all about their money story, their challenges,
Speaker 3: what they're doing, their hotes, their dreams, and we just
Speaker 3: kind of get all the juicy goss.
Speaker 1: Really, don't we be?
Speaker 4: We definitely do.
Speaker 3: It's a very exciting time. We get to peer behind
Speaker 3: the curtain a little bit. And I've got a great
Speaker 3: story for you today. Do you want me to read
Speaker 3: it out?
Speaker 4: I am very excited? What have you got for me?
Speaker 5: So?
Speaker 3: Our diarist says. My parents divorced when I was five.
Speaker 3: Both had different spending habits, and unfortunately I got mom's
Speaker 3: side of spending. I moved out of home and interstate
Speaker 3: at twenty two got into a world of personal debt
Speaker 3: from twenty two to twenty seven. My dad passed away
Speaker 3: three years ago unexpectedly, and his will wasn't up to date,
Speaker 3: so it was a really long and difficult process for
Speaker 3: my family. He's a state finalized in December, and so
Speaker 3: recently I received an inheritance as of six months ago,
Speaker 3: I got a new job and I'm now saving on
Speaker 3: my own, which is really exciting. What a roller coaster.
Speaker 4: And we actually got a ride very.
Speaker 3: Recently about wills and estate planning and all of that,
Speaker 3: so I feel like this is a really good and
Speaker 3: interesting one to talk about, kind of as a follow
Speaker 3: up to that.
Speaker 4: It's crazy because nobody takes wills in a state planning
Speaker 4: seriously until something really dramatic happens. Money Diarist, I believe
Speaker 4: you're hanging out with us already. Hello, how are you?
Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, I'm so good. I feel like this
Speaker 4: is going to be such an interesting money dory and
Speaker 4: I cannot wait to jump straight in. So let's do that,
Speaker 4: Money Diarist, Can you tell us a little bit about
Speaker 4: your money story.
Speaker 5: I think it's been very complicated. So when my parents
Speaker 5: separated when I was five years old, they both met
Speaker 5: other partners. My dad and his previous wife, well his
Speaker 5: next wife worked in government and for universities, and that
Speaker 5: was quite like supportive, and we always had enough. And
Speaker 5: then my mum met someone who had three kids of
Speaker 5: their own and they had two more together, so money
Speaker 5: was a bit more tight between us. With a family
Speaker 5: of two adults and then ended up being seven children.
Speaker 3: A lot of children.
Speaker 5: Yeah, So I definitely heard from like a young age
Speaker 5: that you know, they didn't have any money and we
Speaker 5: were expensive.
Speaker 1: To look after because there was a lot of us.
Speaker 5: And there was times where you know, Mum's like I've
Speaker 5: only got fifty dollars in my account for the week.
Speaker 1: So I think.
Speaker 5: They were two very different circumstances, but I was always
Speaker 5: looked after. I just think later on in life I
Speaker 5: didn't really get taught about money habits. I started working
Speaker 5: full time from when I was eighteen and saved up
Speaker 5: and when overseas on a gap year, and then when
Speaker 5: I came back and had more responsibilities, I think that's
Speaker 5: when I just didn't have the guidance that I needed
Speaker 5: all the knowledge in general just to be able to
Speaker 5: look after myself and to not spend more than my means. Yeah.
Speaker 4: Wow, yeah, oh, I'm going to ask so many questions
Speaker 4: about that.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 5: And then fast forward a couple of years, I decided
Speaker 5: that I wanted to move to Sydney from Canberra and
Speaker 5: I got a job up here. The job wasn't the
Speaker 5: best paying, but I was just super excited to live
Speaker 5: outside of home and be on my own and really
Speaker 5: wanted to travel, but didn't have enough money too, so
Speaker 5: I got out a personal loan and then it kind
Speaker 5: of just snowballed from there. So I'm trying to rebuild
Speaker 5: my relationship with money to have a positive effect on
Speaker 5: my life and know it's there for me and to
Speaker 5: support me in the things that I want to do,
Speaker 5: and it's a tool to just enhance my life.
Speaker 4: Gosh, I love how you're viewing it now as opposed
Speaker 4: to how you grew up. But I'm going to ask
Speaker 4: other questions about that later in the show. Onto the
Speaker 4: next question. What do you currently do for work and
Speaker 4: how much money do you earn?
Speaker 5: So I'm a team assistant for a commercial property developer
Speaker 5: in the city and as of yesterday, I finished my propriation.
Speaker 1: Or congrass thank you.
Speaker 5: I'm now on ninety thousand dollars a year, including super
Speaker 5: oh very nice.
Speaker 4: How exciting. And you passed probation. That's always such. I
Speaker 4: feel like we all know how we're going to do
Speaker 4: on probation, right, Like you kind of know you're doing
Speaker 4: a good job, but there's still that underlying level of
Speaker 4: anxiety where you like but anything could happen, and so
Speaker 4: when you pass it you're like, yes, Like I knew
Speaker 4: this was coming, but it's such a relief.
Speaker 1: Especially with COVID as well. It's just one more layer.
Speaker 4: So you like, eh, what's going on? That is so true?
Speaker 4: Money Diarist, what is your big money at the moment.
Speaker 5: I'd really like to buy a property this year with
Speaker 5: my partner, So that's the big goal. We've got a
Speaker 5: long way to go before we get there. We're not
Speaker 5: in a super rush, but the goal is to add
Speaker 5: more savings to our existing savings and then you know,
Speaker 5: feel comfortable with it.
Speaker 4: Awesome. Do you currently invest money? Diarist?
Speaker 1: Well, I have Super so that's yes, Queen.
Speaker 4: Great answer, great answer.
Speaker 1: But other than that, not at the moment.
Speaker 5: It's something I'd like to do in future, but I
Speaker 5: think I want to rebuild my relationship with money first.
Speaker 5: If I can get a house or a property, that
Speaker 5: would be great, and I think that will be.
Speaker 1: The next step.
Speaker 4: Yeah, epic on investment, still talk to me about Super.
Speaker 4: How much priority do you put on it? How much
Speaker 4: time have you spent looking at it?
Speaker 1: Not a lot.
Speaker 5: I check it every couple of months, I guess, maybe
Speaker 5: like every quarter and make sure you know it's all
Speaker 5: coming through from work.
Speaker 1: And that's fine. I feel all right with it.
Speaker 5: I think I could be more involved in it. I
Speaker 5: think I could utilize the superneration company more to talk
Speaker 5: about what I want my.
Speaker 1: Future to look like.
Speaker 5: And I guess I can't remember what are they called?
Speaker 5: What are the different types of investments?
Speaker 4: The portfolios?
Speaker 5: Yes, I think I could be more involved with what
Speaker 5: portfolios are available and what would suit me best.
Speaker 4: My gosh, that is a really good point that you
Speaker 4: bring up utilizing the super company. Like most super companies.
Speaker 6: Have advisors and teams that you can just call ninety
Speaker 6: nine percent of the time for free to be like, hey,
Speaker 6: this is a goal of mine. Am I going to
Speaker 6: be able to achieve it?
Speaker 4: And they'll be able to let you know and talk you.
Speaker 6: Through stuff like that. That's what they're there for. Go
Speaker 6: get the free advice from your supercompany. I mean, obviously,
Speaker 6: take everything with a grain of salt, because they can't
Speaker 6: advise you on whether you should stay with the super
Speaker 6: company or if you should go or with the right.
Speaker 4: You know, the right actual company for you. But when
Speaker 4: it comes to have I got enough money in there,
Speaker 4: like what amount of contribution. Should I be investing to
Speaker 4: achieve X, Y and Z. They'll know all those answers,
Speaker 4: so definitely give them a buzz. But I could go
Speaker 4: on about super forever, ask Jess I actually do in
Speaker 4: the office. The next question for your money diarist is
Speaker 4: do you currently have any debts?
Speaker 1: I have a credit card.
Speaker 5: The limit is one thy five hundred, so that's more
Speaker 5: just for me and my partner if we want to
Speaker 5: go just traveling within Australia and we want to book
Speaker 5: a higher car and we can put that on there.
Speaker 5: It's fully paid except for two hundred dollars for address
Speaker 5: that I've got for a wedding in two weeks time.
Speaker 5: Oh exciting, and I'll pay that off when I get
Speaker 5: paid next week.
Speaker 4: So before when we read out your money story, obviously
Speaker 4: you've been in some debt before. How much debt were
Speaker 4: you in and how did.
Speaker 5: You get out of it? I think the total number
Speaker 5: wasn't very nice. I think it was like between a
Speaker 5: personal loan.
Speaker 1: And a car.
Speaker 5: It was combined, probably about five thousand dollars. So I
Speaker 5: got a personal loan in twenty seventeen to essentially fund
Speaker 5: a trip to go overseas and to help me, like
Speaker 5: with paying rent while I was away, And I had
Speaker 5: also bought a second hand car on finance six months
Speaker 5: before that as well, and then I increased it over
Speaker 5: a couple of years as well, so I kept paying
Speaker 5: it off and then would increase it.
Speaker 4: I feel like that's the cycle of debt because you go,
Speaker 4: oh my gosh, like if your ste comes up, like
Speaker 4: you need to, but you also get into debt and
Speaker 4: then you rely on it in a way you're like, okay, cool,
Speaker 4: like I know, if something comes up, I can just
Speaker 4: put it on there and I'll just keep paying it off, right,
Speaker 4: Like it's not that big of an issue. But what
Speaker 4: you forget is that it's an issue for future you.
Speaker 4: And I feel like it's such a cycle.
Speaker 5: Yeah, twenty two year old me did not care about
Speaker 5: twenty seven year old me.
Speaker 1: Oh, she was like, she'll have it together.
Speaker 4: She'll be fine, of course she will, she'll be great.
Speaker 4: In fact, like we don't know her. Who's twenty seven
Speaker 4: year old me? Like we don't care about her, we've
Speaker 4: never met her.
Speaker 3: When you're twenty two to twenty seven, themes so far away.
Speaker 4: Also, there's such different ages as well, Like Jess, you're
Speaker 4: twenty seven. Now you just turned twenty eight July. Not sure, Yeah,
Speaker 4: now twenty eight this year though, twenty twenty two and
Speaker 4: twenty yeah. Okay, so we're on track for me to
Speaker 4: remember my team's birthday dates. That's good. But do you
Speaker 4: remember when you were twenty two? Like I remember back
Speaker 4: to being twenty two, and it's such a different mindset
Speaker 4: to twenty seven.
Speaker 3: I was very similar to Osiris in that I was
Speaker 3: stuck in the debt cycle at that age. So I
Speaker 3: think it's heaven and it's it's Yeah, it just happens
Speaker 3: to everybody when you're younger and you don't have access
Speaker 3: to that level of education. And we'll probably talk a
Speaker 3: little bit later. You said about you know, your mum's
Speaker 3: spending habits and how that.
Speaker 4: Influences I've got so many questions about that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and so when you've been brought up that way,
Speaker 3: it's just kind of a way of life, really, isn't it.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I feel like when you talk about ages and
Speaker 4: you might go of victoria, but like the difference between
Speaker 4: being a six year old and being a ten year
Speaker 4: old that's massive too. But I feel like once you
Speaker 4: turn eighteen nineteen, you get to twenty two, you genuinely
Speaker 4: believe that you're like fully adult. You're like, well, I'm
Speaker 4: an adult, Like I have my shit together, Like I'm
Speaker 4: never going to be more mature than this, Like you
Speaker 4: just genuinely feel and like I look back on it,
Speaker 4: I was exactly the same, Like my priorities were really
Speaker 4: short term what I was planning. I just thought I
Speaker 4: was so smart and I'm not. Like It's it's interesting
Speaker 4: looking back because I think a lot of people listening
Speaker 4: to this might be twenty two, and they'll be like,
Speaker 4: I won't change, Like my priorities won't change, and it's
Speaker 4: not necessarily even about money, But you would be surprised
Speaker 4: at how much your mindset can change over that period
Speaker 4: of time and your values and your priorities. And one
Speaker 4: day you wake up and you're like, wow, I'd love
Speaker 4: a new vacuum cleaner, and it just becomes yeah, it
Speaker 4: becomes so interesting to look back on those things. Do
Speaker 4: you find that you were a completely different person, Like
Speaker 4: twenty two year old spending you is not who you
Speaker 4: are today.
Speaker 5: Just really buried my head in the sand. Just didn't
Speaker 5: want to think about like future me as well, because
Speaker 5: I obviously didn't have enough to cover my expenses, so
Speaker 5: I was just like just took it, you know.
Speaker 1: My month at a time.
Speaker 5: So when I got to about twenty three twenty four,
Speaker 5: I was like, okay, I really need to try and
Speaker 5: start paying this step down. And I sold my car
Speaker 5: and that covered the payment of it.
Speaker 1: So that was a great start.
Speaker 5: So that knocked about like ten thousand dollars off, and
Speaker 5: then I had ways to go with the rest of
Speaker 5: the debt. And my goal was to just keep paying
Speaker 5: it and then try and increase my salary.
Speaker 1: With working as well.
Speaker 5: And I was settling into my career more and I
Speaker 5: knew I had better opportunities down the line, and I
Speaker 5: just I didn't pay additional but I did prioritize it
Speaker 5: in a way where I was like, Okay, I'm not
Speaker 5: miss I think any payments. I'm just going to keep
Speaker 5: going with it and then I'll get there and then
Speaker 5: if I get a salary increase, you know, then I
Speaker 5: can start paying more of it off.
Speaker 4: I feel like that's such a common mindset. Yeah, I'll
Speaker 4: just pay it off and it earn more. I'll learn
Speaker 4: more at some point soon it should be right.
Speaker 5: So I was doing that and then when my dad
Speaker 5: passed away unexpectedly, it was awful and I would have
Speaker 5: anything bring him back. But also at the same time,
Speaker 5: I was like, okay, well, I'm going to get an
Speaker 5: inheritance and I can use that to pay it off.
Speaker 5: Little did I know that the will wasn't up to
Speaker 5: date and it was a really long.
Speaker 1: Process for our family.
Speaker 5: So it took just under three years, and in that time,
Speaker 5: I still kept paying off my debt, so I had
Speaker 5: gotten most of it down. So as I like July,
Speaker 5: I think it was just under like seven thousand dollars,
Speaker 5: and that was when I was about to start my
Speaker 5: new job, and I was it was a really big
Speaker 5: salary increase for me, so I was like, Okay, I
Speaker 5: can definitely pay this off by the end of the year.
Speaker 5: So we're kind of all in one that I was like,
Speaker 5: I know this is coming, but I also now know
Speaker 5: that I can have the ability to save to be
Speaker 5: able to pay this off.
Speaker 4: Oh how good. So you ended up paying it off
Speaker 4: all on your own and weren't reliant on like the
Speaker 4: inheritance to wipe your debt clean.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, I still need my mom and my stepdad
Speaker 5: helped me out with some lawyers fees during the process
Speaker 5: as well, so I did pay them back. That was
Speaker 5: always like, when it comes through, this is what you'll
Speaker 5: be paying back.
Speaker 1: So I was like, okay, that's fine.
Speaker 5: Yeah, so yeah, that's the debt that I paid off
Speaker 5: with it, so which.
Speaker 1: Wasn't too bad.
Speaker 4: Yeah. I really like that. You got to set the
Speaker 4: mindset and the habit up of saving and paying off
Speaker 4: a debt. Because one thing that I do find, and
Speaker 4: I guess having had experience with a lot of people
Speaker 4: who have gotten inheritance, is because that's actually what I
Speaker 4: specialize in in my wealth business, a lot of people
Speaker 4: their in debt. When they receive an inheritance, they wipe
Speaker 4: it off. That is so great, like they're not in
Speaker 4: debt anymore, but they haven't set up these positive savings habits,
Speaker 4: so they either burn through money really quickly or end
Speaker 4: up in a little bit of a pickle because they
Speaker 4: don't have that budget and cash flow mindset around what
Speaker 4: they need to be doing with money, Like, they don't
Speaker 4: prioritize it in the same way that money darrest you
Speaker 4: might because you go, all right, that was really hard
Speaker 4: to get out of. Now I have it, I've got
Speaker 4: to look after.
Speaker 1: It, I never never want to do it again.
Speaker 4: Yeah, understandably so, but it's such a different mindset to
Speaker 4: one of oh, well that was wiped off. It's not
Speaker 4: an issue. It was never a stress for me, like
Speaker 4: I didn't have to pay it off in a way.
Speaker 4: So I do find it super interesting watching people and
Speaker 4: their mindsets around inheritances because over the next I think
Speaker 4: it's over the next ten years, there's going to be
Speaker 4: the biggest shifted into generational wealth that Australia has ever experienced.
Speaker 4: And it's not nice to talk about, but a lot
Speaker 4: of our listeners, a lot of our community are going
Speaker 4: to be in similar situations to you, where a parent
Speaker 4: is no longer able to be with us and they've
Speaker 4: got this responsibility and as you've found out, that will process.
Speaker 4: It's not an easy one. Takes a while, it does. Yeah,
Speaker 4: Money Diarist. The next question, which is such a pivot
Speaker 4: from talking about debt and inheritance, it's actually about spending money.
Speaker 1: Diarist, Do you shop that? Yes? I do.
Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, what are true? She's on the Money
Speaker 4: Community member Jess.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I do love it, and I think one of
Speaker 5: the previous Money diarists she's like, oh, I use it
Speaker 5: for everything. If I'm like buying flowers, and I was like, oh,
Speaker 5: I didn't know you could like use it other than
Speaker 5: like online shopping like the Iconic and for clothes and things.
Speaker 5: So I've just bought some furniture, so I've used it
Speaker 5: on that, like booking trips away with like the accommodation.
Speaker 5: So what I did last year was I just let
Speaker 5: it build up for the year and then I withdraw
Speaker 5: it at Christmas time and then that funds some of
Speaker 5: my Christmas present good So.
Speaker 4: That takes a bit of the Christmas stress, just like
Speaker 4: it adds up like slowly.
Speaker 5: But you know, extra two hundred dollars at Christmas time
Speaker 5: makes all the difference.
Speaker 4: It's a lot of money. Like that's a fair few
Speaker 4: presents that are off the list and you don't have
Speaker 4: to worry about. Jess, I have a question for you.
Speaker 4: We were talking about how our money direst is now
Speaker 4: using it for more than just like clothes on the Iconic.
Speaker 4: Who's work account did you shop back connected to in
Speaker 4: the shees on the Money office, Jesscricci.
Speaker 3: That would be mine because we don't have a Sheese
Speaker 3: on the money account and stupid. Any opportunity to make
Speaker 3: an extra dollar, I'm all about it.
Speaker 4: But you did ask.
Speaker 1: I did ask.
Speaker 4: So for those listening along that like, maybe I should
Speaker 4: put this on my work computer, only do that if
Speaker 4: you have permission. Otherwise you could find yourself in a
Speaker 4: whole heap.
Speaker 1: Of trouble with Let just do it.
Speaker 4: I mean, she deserves it, right, It's.
Speaker 3: Like a treat yourself moment. It's a good point you
Speaker 3: make though about like other stuff to online shopping, because
Speaker 3: someone shared with us a couple of weeks go on Instagram.
Speaker 3: You can use it on calls online. So if you
Speaker 3: do your grocery shop, you can do like the click
Speaker 3: and collect. If you don't want to pay the extra
Speaker 3: for the delivery, which I don't because I'm stingy, you
Speaker 3: can place your click and collect, get the shot back,
Speaker 3: and then just pick it up like you would normally,
Speaker 3: which is pretty cool.
Speaker 1: That's great. That's a great tip. I didn't know that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, saving money for everybody.
Speaker 4: Your a genius, Jesse Ricci. All right, obviously that's good
Speaker 4: money habit. But we are now going to ask you money, Darrist,
Speaker 4: what is your best money habit?
Speaker 5: I would say, I really know what's coming in and
Speaker 5: out of my account. So I'm like aware and keeping
Speaker 5: like keep in check of like how much money we've
Speaker 5: got in our account, and like what I've got in
Speaker 5: my account, and this is my expenses that are coming up,
Speaker 5: and I get paid monthly, so every month I know,
Speaker 5: like what are the events that I've got one that
Speaker 5: I'm going to need a little bit extra for and
Speaker 5: whose birthdays it is? But so I just make sure
Speaker 5: that I planned all of that out and also buying
Speaker 5: things on sale, so I try really hard, especially with
Speaker 5: clothing and discretionary items, to not buy them full price,
Speaker 5: excluding a door beauty.
Speaker 3: Take an exception there.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we can bend the rules right, just a little bit,
Speaker 4: especially for a door like I get it. Yeah, they
Speaker 4: send you a Timtam, so it's worth it, right, do
Speaker 4: it all.
Speaker 3: For the Timtam. As a fellow organized person, I feel
Speaker 3: like that is a really undervalued skill. We don't often
Speaker 3: hear people say when we ask them this question, Oh,
Speaker 3: my best skill or my best hack is that I
Speaker 3: have visibility. And visibility is so important because if you
Speaker 3: can't see, if you don't know what you've got coming
Speaker 3: in and going out, I feel like you don't have
Speaker 3: the foundation to set up those really good habits like
Speaker 3: paying off your debt or making your saving. So I
Speaker 3: think that's a really really good ENDFI.
Speaker 5: Yeah, and it's nice to feel that if some month
Speaker 5: I've got a lot on and you know, I've got
Speaker 5: friends getting married and you know those are bigger expensive
Speaker 5: and like bigger birthdays with my family, that I'm not
Speaker 5: hurting my I'm still putting savings aside. But even if
Speaker 5: it's less like I'm still that's okay. Like if it's
Speaker 5: a couple hundred dollars less than the previous month, at
Speaker 5: least I'm still saving. Rather than if I never checked.
Speaker 5: I feel like I'd just be like, oh, well, I've
Speaker 5: got all these expenses this month, so I won't even bother.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's a good mindset to have. I really like that.
Speaker 4: Next question, though, is the exact opposite. Money Diarist, what's
Speaker 4: your worst money?
Speaker 5: Haveit a little bit of treat yourself sometimes when you know,
Speaker 5: maybe a couple of weeks ago, I've bought something that
Speaker 5: I've wanted for a long time, and then on occasion,
Speaker 5: especially if things are on sale, I'm like, well that's
Speaker 5: really good. I really like that, And that's going to
Speaker 5: serve a good purpose for me. But I probably could
Speaker 5: wait another couple of weeks. But I think when things
Speaker 5: are on sale, I'm like, Okay, I'll get it now
Speaker 5: because I'll be saving this extra money.
Speaker 4: But that's not the worst thing. If it's a super
Speaker 4: planned purchase, right, Like, that's not bad at all. I think,
Speaker 4: in fact, that's a pretty good money habit. I mean, obviously,
Speaker 4: when it comes to cash flow, it might not be
Speaker 4: putting you in the best possible position. But if you're like,
Speaker 4: I'm gonna buy this in a few weeks anyway, and
Speaker 4: it's on tail now, I'm like, that's a money we in,
Speaker 4: is it not? Maybe into.
Speaker 1: Yeah, just getting a lot better?
Speaker 4: Yeah, all right, money Diaris. Last question before we go
Speaker 4: to a bit of a break is what grade would
Speaker 4: you give yourself if we forced you to give your
Speaker 4: money habits A grade.
Speaker 5: I would say a bee. I've progressed a lot. I
Speaker 5: made a lot of changes to my mindset, but I
Speaker 5: think I've got ways to go. I have some big
Speaker 5: goals with wanting to buy a house, and I want
Speaker 5: to be able to keep saving as well. So I
Speaker 5: really only felt like the last six months I've been
Speaker 5: able to save over the last couple of years, so
Speaker 5: I really want to keep those habits for the future.
Speaker 4: Oh, I really like that. All Right, I have a
Speaker 4: whole heap of questions for you after this really quick break.
Speaker 4: All Right, we are back and money dirist, I want
Speaker 4: to get into it. You said that your parents divorced
Speaker 4: when you were quite young. They went their separate ways,
Speaker 4: started their own families, and your mum had seven kids
Speaker 4: in total in the end, which would put a financial
Speaker 4: squeeze on anybody, right, Like that is a lot of
Speaker 4: those are a lot of mouths to feed. How did
Speaker 4: that work day to day? And as a kid growing
Speaker 4: up in that situation, Like, did you feel pressure? How
Speaker 4: did that make you feel?
Speaker 5: So my mom was with someone from when I was
Speaker 5: five till I was twelve, So my mother had me
Speaker 5: and my sister and he had three and then they
Speaker 5: had two together. So I definitely felt when I was
Speaker 5: like thirty, even though she had separated from him, I
Speaker 5: just wanted my own money and I wanted to work
Speaker 5: and just be able to buy things for myself because
Speaker 5: I know there was a lot of pressure on her.
Speaker 5: So I guess when I was younger, I really wondered
Speaker 5: like how she was affording to like look after all
Speaker 5: of us. She also didn't work for a period of time,
Speaker 5: so I didn't realize at the time, because I was young,
Speaker 5: that she was getting benefits to help with us. And
Speaker 5: then I would go over to my dad's house and
Speaker 5: everything would be looked after for us, and we went
Speaker 5: on holidays and that was really that was really great,
Speaker 5: and we enjoyed that a lot. But I didn't feel
Speaker 5: that we were putting strain on my dad and his
Speaker 5: wife at the time.
Speaker 4: And did you feel that you were putting I mean,
Speaker 4: just based on your language, did you feel that you
Speaker 4: were putting strain on your mum? And if so, how
Speaker 4: did you, I guess as a young kid operate in
Speaker 4: those different situations.
Speaker 1: Well, I just knew as.
Speaker 5: Soon as I could work, I would, So I got
Speaker 5: my first job when I was just under fifteen, a baker's.
Speaker 1: Delight, and I was.
Speaker 5: So happy to have my own money and just be
Speaker 5: able to like buy the clothes and things that I
Speaker 5: wanted and CDs. I definitely knew that at Dad's place
Speaker 5: he would have more capability to like buy me bigger
Speaker 5: things or bigger ticket items rather than asking my mum.
Speaker 5: I definitely leaned on my dad more to help me
Speaker 5: with the things that I wanted, but they were they
Speaker 5: also did work really well together as like co parenting,
Speaker 5: so they did, you know, split all of our school
Speaker 5: fees braces car driving lessons and things like that and
Speaker 5: going you know, school camps and things. So they did
Speaker 5: make that fifty to fifty, So I really like I've
Speaker 5: kept that with me so with my partner at the moment,
Speaker 5: we have a similar income, so everything's fifty to fifty
Speaker 5: between us, and I really.
Speaker 1: Am value that a lot, but I know that it
Speaker 1: was just it was.
Speaker 5: A lot easier on my dad's side from what I knew,
Speaker 5: which probably wasn't a lot because money wasn't really spoken
Speaker 5: about heavily in either of our families except from my mum,
Speaker 5: but I knew she was a lot more stressed about it.
Speaker 3: So it sounds like they worked really hard to make
Speaker 3: that work for you guys, with those two very different
Speaker 3: dear styles, which I think.
Speaker 4: Is really special.
Speaker 3: With a situation like that where one family could potentially
Speaker 3: afford to give you more or be a little more comfortable,
Speaker 3: there would have been a huge potential for that to
Speaker 3: put a strain on that relationship, So I think it's
Speaker 3: so admirable and really worth highlighting that they worked through
Speaker 3: that to do as much as they could for you
Speaker 3: guys within the bounds of their own means.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Yeah, that's really special. I like that because often,
Speaker 4: you know, once a couple divorces, like there's a personal
Speaker 4: level of that, so sometimes they don't work as well
Speaker 4: together or there's something going on, but it's nice to
Speaker 4: know that they were harmonious. Can we pivot the conversation
Speaker 4: to talking about wills and estate planning for a hot
Speaker 4: You know, when your father passed away, was that an
Speaker 4: expected thing or was it an absolute shock?
Speaker 3: Like?
Speaker 4: Can you tell us a little bit about that process.
Speaker 1: It was a pretty big shock.
Speaker 5: So he had been unwell for quite some time, so
Speaker 5: he went through a second divorce. He had previously struggled
Speaker 5: with alcoholism, and I think that was just really the
Speaker 5: kind of the last straw for him and he moved away,
Speaker 5: So he moved up to Queensland, so we just didn't
Speaker 5: have the same connection. And I think I was really
Speaker 5: upset that my life had kind of turned upside down
Speaker 5: because he had been with his wife at the time
Speaker 5: for fifteen years and since I was five, so it
Speaker 5: really did feel like parents separating. And they had two
Speaker 5: younger daughters together, who I love very dearly and are
Speaker 5: very close to. So I was really upset with him
Speaker 5: for leaving and not giving them the same childhood experience
Speaker 5: that I had.
Speaker 4: Well, that's really sweet that that's how you viewed it,
Speaker 4: like it was obviously your dad's leaving and that's changed
Speaker 4: for you. But it was because they wouldn't get the
Speaker 4: experience that you got with him.
Speaker 5: Yeah, and he was a really wonderful dad. He could
Speaker 5: definitely manage us. So he left and then we just
Speaker 5: lost contact, and it upset me that he didn't want
Speaker 5: to be around as much. But I think I really
Speaker 5: just didn't know the extent of how living with an
Speaker 5: addiction works and how much it changes a person's personality.
Speaker 5: So when he passed away, I knew he wasn't probably
Speaker 5: in the best place, but I didn't realize how severe
Speaker 5: that it was, and neither did the rest of my family.
Speaker 1: So yeah, it was a bit. It was a big
Speaker 1: shock to us.
Speaker 4: That's really awful, but that's how it sometimes works for
Speaker 4: some people. An addiction is it's not easy to hide,
Speaker 4: but people with it work incredibly hard, oh to shelter
Speaker 4: you from that so that you might not And as
Speaker 4: you said, you didn't know the full extent of it.
Speaker 4: And I don't think that that's anyone's fault.
Speaker 1: It just is what it is.
Speaker 4: But it's also there's a level of denial in these
Speaker 4: things as well. So he didn't think it was as
Speaker 4: bad as it was. He didn't know that that was
Speaker 4: going to be the case. And you know, when it
Speaker 4: comes to I guess the overlay of wills and estate planning,
Speaker 4: you're already grieving, like you're already having a really shitty
Speaker 4: time to then find out you have to go through
Speaker 4: this entire process of like claiming a will. What was
Speaker 4: that like and how did you find out that it
Speaker 4: would be that hard?
Speaker 5: I didn't find out it would be that hard until
Speaker 5: I was in it, and once it had started. So
Speaker 5: he had a will of from when he was married,
Speaker 5: and then once he had his second divorce, he didn't
Speaker 5: update it, which was what caused the issue. So when
Speaker 5: you divorce from somebody and if they're in your will,
Speaker 5: it treats them like they've died.
Speaker 1: So the first schedule of his will is.
Speaker 5: Like everything will go to my wife, so that was void.
Speaker 1: And then the second.
Speaker 5: Part of the world was for his four daughters, including me,
Speaker 5: and because in the will it looked like that my
Speaker 5: younger sisters wouldn't have any parents and that they would
Speaker 5: be orphans because it treated like his.
Speaker 1: Expension like she had died.
Speaker 5: So the majority of this estate went to them, and
Speaker 5: we didn't feel like it was a fair split between
Speaker 5: us because now all four children had one parent each.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and they both had a mum still around. Yeah,
Speaker 4: that was it was just the legalities and the way
Speaker 4: the legals work and split it. It's crazy to think
Speaker 4: that that is how it is, and you would think,
Speaker 4: wellias are smart, they'd be able to have that conversation,
Speaker 4: but they have to adhere to what the law says, right, Yeah.
Speaker 1: So we asked my sister's mother.
Speaker 5: We're like, look, we think that the will should, like
Speaker 5: his estate should be split more fairly between us. This
Speaker 5: was quite recently after he'd passed away. I think maybe
Speaker 5: after two months. That's what we decided on. And then
Speaker 5: as time went on, we started to get in contact
Speaker 5: with lawyers and started the process and they advised us
Speaker 5: that we were going to need a deed to amend
Speaker 5: this to show that yes, we had all agreed with
Speaker 5: each other, and that's what took a really long time.
Speaker 5: My sister's mother kind of took back what she said
Speaker 5: and she wasn't happy with the even split anymore. So
Speaker 5: then we had to get our own separate lawyers and
Speaker 5: then that was a long process and then come to
Speaker 5: an agreement together. So that was a lot of pushing, yeah.
Speaker 4: And stress.
Speaker 5: Yeah, and we all know like that he would want
Speaker 5: the four of us just to have it as even
Speaker 5: as possible. Yeah, because our testamentary trust were you can't
Speaker 5: access it until you're twenty five, and I was just
Speaker 5: twenty four at the time, so I didn't have long
Speaker 5: to go, but my youngest ones had a very long
Speaker 5: time there. And to us, we're like, well, that's at
Speaker 5: least ten fifteen years where you're able to invest that.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's fair, And I would have to because testamentary
Speaker 4: trusts are very hard to argue with. You would have
Speaker 4: to keep that in cash. Like if that was the
Speaker 4: case where you're correct, like if you amend that, they
Speaker 4: could invest it in the interim. So it's a really
Speaker 4: fickle part of the law and a part of you know, life,
Speaker 4: that people don't think about, and it is really stressful
Speaker 4: and it is really complicated. So, my friend, what ended
Speaker 4: up happening is it now evenly split? Is everybody in
Speaker 4: the best possible position.
Speaker 5: So we decided to split it sixty forty, So my
Speaker 5: two youngest ones have thirty percent each, and then myself
Speaker 5: and my sister we have twenty percent each.
Speaker 4: And how I'm going to be so pervy? How did
Speaker 4: you come to that as being a fair split when
Speaker 4: just before you said my dad would want it even so.
Speaker 5: In the will originally it was seventy thirty, so right,
Speaker 5: it wasn't too far off, but it wasn't fifty to fifty,
Speaker 5: So I just that's what we pushed for.
Speaker 4: So, yeah, that's fair. It's just interesting to understand the splait. Yeah,
Speaker 4: not being too person.
Speaker 5: No no, no, no, it's good for people to learn
Speaker 5: about like this is this is what can happen absolutely
Speaker 5: in a line.
Speaker 4: And then to take it another layer further, your dad's estate,
Speaker 4: what was it made up of? Was it just cash?
Speaker 4: Was it cash and assets like properties? Was there a
Speaker 4: life insurance or an insurance component to this that needed
Speaker 4: to be paid out? And how did the semantics of
Speaker 4: all of that happen.
Speaker 5: So it was superannuation, which was the majority of it
Speaker 5: because he'd worked for university.
Speaker 4: We have nice super.
Speaker 5: He did have nice super ah, and then he had
Speaker 5: a dad. Yeah, he had a small unit. And then
Speaker 5: he had some cash as well. But most of the cash,
Speaker 5: I reckon was taken up by just managing the estate
Speaker 5: and yeah, and legal fees.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and that's something that you just don't realize that's
Speaker 4: such an expensive process. Like people who are like, oh,
Speaker 4: it doesn't matter if we don't have a will, Like, yes,
Speaker 4: it does.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 4: In fact, a clean, clear will would have saved you, guys,
Speaker 4: not only three years, but a whole heap of headaches
Speaker 4: and admin and legal conversations that you needed to wrap
Speaker 4: your head around and the stress of being like I
Speaker 4: don't understand it. Is someone screwing me over here? Like
Speaker 4: do I get it? Do I not get it? Are
Speaker 4: they operating my best interests? Like were you comfortable through
Speaker 4: that process? Like how did you manage it personally?
Speaker 1: And so you were okay? Now there was a lot
Speaker 1: of meltdowns.
Speaker 4: I'm not surprised.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 5: I used to work with someone who was in family law,
Speaker 5: so that was really helpful. Just to be able to
Speaker 5: ask her questions. And then the lawyers that we had
Speaker 5: my sister and I as beneficiary. She was really great
Speaker 5: and made sure that we were comfortable and we understood
Speaker 5: everything that was going on, and then gave us scenarios
Speaker 5: as well. So she did, you know, make it very
Speaker 5: clear if you're going to contest this will and you
Speaker 5: don't want it the way it is, the most likely
Speaker 5: thing is that their fees are just going to eat
Speaker 5: up all of your Yeah, and she's like, so it
Speaker 5: would be best to try and have just be able
Speaker 5: to work it out together.
Speaker 4: So yeah, that's fair, that's fair.
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry that you had this experience.
Speaker 3: I just want to say through an already really traumatic
Speaker 3: time dealing with that unexpected death, and I just wanted
Speaker 3: to say thank you for sharing such personal intimate information
Speaker 3: about the process, because, as you said, I think it's
Speaker 3: something that people just really do not it sect to
Speaker 3: deal with, and particularly if you're younger, you kind of go, oh, like,
Speaker 3: the figure it out, it'll be fine, like I'm sure
Speaker 3: it'll be all good, and they maybe don't consider the
Speaker 3: ramifications that that has on the loved ones that you
Speaker 3: leave behind. So I think that this story that you've
Speaker 3: shared with us will really be a little bit of
Speaker 3: kick up the butt to some people, including me, who
Speaker 3: need to get a little in order and make sure
Speaker 3: that things are all sorted out. So thank you so
Speaker 3: so much.
Speaker 1: You're so welcome.
Speaker 3: If anyone does need a little bit more insight intervals,
Speaker 3: as we said at the top, we did cover that
Speaker 3: not too long ago. Also have a search through the
Speaker 3: feed for more information. There's also some really great government
Speaker 3: resources out there that will link in the show notes
Speaker 3: that you can look into.
Speaker 6: Yeah, and one thing that I want to say this
Speaker 6: has been again Jess is absolutely correct. Thank you for
Speaker 6: sharing that because it's not when it's not easy to
Speaker 6: talk about, but it's such an intimate part, Like I'm
Speaker 6: asking about how your father passed away and what that
Speaker 6: looked like and how that worked, and it's a lot.
Speaker 6: But it's also so powerful for the community to hear that,
Speaker 6: because often when we have a friend going through a
Speaker 6: similar situation, you're like, what was the real process?
Speaker 4: Like you just know that they're working it out, Like
Speaker 4: you're not going to ask those pervy questions because usually
Speaker 4: you're like, I don't want to pry I don't want to,
Speaker 4: you know, overstep my MUK. I just need to make
Speaker 4: sure that they're okay. And this story I think is
Speaker 4: going to really help so many people see that. It's
Speaker 4: not just you know, me a financial advisor being like
Speaker 4: it's important get your will in order, but it genuinely
Speaker 4: is so important to place a value on this, not
Speaker 4: just for you, but also for your family, because you
Speaker 4: don't want to put your family through unnecessary stress.
Speaker 5: It's for your family. It's to make a really horrible
Speaker 5: time for them so much easier and stress very So
Speaker 5: I really would encourage everyone to get one.
Speaker 4: Yes, exactly exactly, all right, well money diarist, I do
Speaker 4: think that is all we have time for today with
Speaker 4: FIM recording for ages. Again, thank you for joining us.
Speaker 4: But just before we head off, as always, we'd like
Speaker 4: to acknowledge and pay respect to Australia's Aboriginal and Torres
Speaker 4: Strait island of People's. They're the traditional custodians of the lands,
Speaker 4: the waterways and the skies all across Australia. We thank
Speaker 4: you for sharing and for caring for the land on
Speaker 4: which we are able to learn. We pay respects to
Speaker 4: elders past and present, and we share our friendship and
Speaker 4: our kindness, and the.
Speaker 3: Advice shared on Cheese on the money is generally nature
Speaker 3: and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's on the money.
Speaker 3: Is this purely for educational purposes and should not be
Speaker 3: relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. And
Speaker 3: we promise Victoria Divine is an authorized representative of Infocused
Speaker 3: Securities Australia Proprietary Limited ABN four seven oh nine seven
Speaker 3: seven nine seven zero four nine AFSL two three six
Speaker 3: five two three.
Speaker 4: I'm not used to that yet, jess.
Speaker 1: It, that's a little more weird.
Speaker 4: I'll get baby next week. Say later, guys.
Speaker 3: Bye,