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Speaker 1: Hello.

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Speaker 2: My name's Santasha Nabananga Bamblet. I'm a proud yr the

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Speaker 2: Order Kerni Whoalbury and a waddery woman. And before we

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Speaker 2: get started on She's on the Money podcast, I would

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Speaker 2: like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land of

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Speaker 2: which this podcast is recorded on a wondery country, acknowledging

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Speaker 2: the elders, the ancestors and the next generation coming through.

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Speaker 2: As this podcast is about connecting, empowering, knowledge sharing and

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Speaker 2: the storytelling of you to make a difference for today

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Speaker 2: and lasting impact for tomorrow.

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Speaker 3: Let's get into it.

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Speaker 4: She's on the Money, She's on the Money.

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Speaker 5: Hello, and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast

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Speaker 5: Millennials who Want Financial Freedom. My name is Jessica Ricky

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Speaker 5: and as always I have the wonderful Beck Sayer joining

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Speaker 5: me today because it is Friday, and today we are

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Speaker 5: going to celebrate you, the incredible She's on the Money community.

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Speaker 5: Today we'll be sharing some of our favorite money wins.

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Speaker 5: We'll be helping to answer a juicy money dilemma, which

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Speaker 5: this week is all about where the pocket money is

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Speaker 5: a good idea for kids, And we're going to unpack

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Speaker 5: something that you slid into our DMS, about which this

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Speaker 5: week is all about managing gift giving expectations with your nieces.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Beck, Yes, the vibe in the room's different.

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Speaker 3: It is.

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Speaker 1: It feels like there's again. I think I'm seeing double

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Speaker 1: but I don't know. Tell me what. I'm also extremely drunk.

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Speaker 6: But.

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Speaker 3: Maybe we all are.

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Speaker 1: Maddie, Jay and Ashwicks welcome individually or both many things,

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Speaker 1: but together you make two doting dads. Thank you so

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Speaker 1: much for joining us. Tell us a little bit more

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Speaker 1: about the pod.

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Speaker 6: Well, I just want to stop you right there, thank

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Speaker 6: you for having me. And before you start thanking.

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Speaker 3: Us, I am many things. I would hold.

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Speaker 6: Off giving us any type of applause until the end

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Speaker 6: of the episode because.

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Speaker 3: I don't know. We're not very not very very dumb.

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Speaker 6: Appropriate work just to manage everyone's expectations.

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Speaker 3: I don't know where I am. I got lost.

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Speaker 7: I was walking on the street and someone was like,

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Speaker 7: through this door, sir, and here I'm sitting down here

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Speaker 7: and now I'm talking to Yeah.

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Speaker 1: We actually weren't meant to be talking to you guys,

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Speaker 1: So thanks so much for coming back the studio.

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Speaker 3: That's fine.

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Speaker 7: Two doting dads is a podcast about the trials and

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Speaker 7: tribulations of parenting.

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Speaker 3: It's the good, the bad, and the relatable. Yeah, it's

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Speaker 3: not meant to be.

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Speaker 6: Well, the last thing you wanted to do was offer

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Speaker 6: any type of advice, because I think there's enough people

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Speaker 6: out there trying to offer advice to parents, and I

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Speaker 6: think every kid is so different that I think the

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Speaker 6: point the parents really need is just to know that

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Speaker 6: there's others out there who were struggling just as much

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Speaker 6: as they are.

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Speaker 3: Shed pain. I think, yeah, we wanted to.

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Speaker 7: Create an environment where everyone's just doing the best they can.

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Speaker 6: It's a safe, safe place. I think the most common

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Speaker 6: bit of feedback we get is that it's just refreshing

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Speaker 6: to hear other parents struggling.

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Speaker 3: Have a shit time. It's a bit ship it is.

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Speaker 3: But also we love our kids, yeah so much.

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Speaker 1: He really summed up my thoughts on children in general.

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Speaker 7: Is we always say they're like owning drunk people. That's

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Speaker 7: like our that's irrational. They love you sometimes and then

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Speaker 7: they just lose it for no reason.

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Speaker 1: That's fun. You're really selling it. Can a non dad listen, but.

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Speaker 3: Absolutely we actually know.

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Speaker 6: We thought we'd be a really blokey podcast and then

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Speaker 6: we ended up having more like we're more mums. Yeah,

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Speaker 6: and I think we're lucky in that.

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Speaker 8: Men.

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Speaker 3: The bar is so low.

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Speaker 7: Agreed, agreed, and so well listen, all collectively agree.

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Speaker 6: We can talk about us stuff ups with just like

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Speaker 6: a total lack of fear of judgment.

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Speaker 7: Because they're all stuff ups. Yeah, not a lot, Like,

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Speaker 7: there's not a lot we're doing. We're bumbling our way

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Speaker 7: through most of it.

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Speaker 6: As all parents, it doesn't matter how amazing you are

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Speaker 6: as a parent. Every day there's some type of stuff

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Speaker 6: up that you have to deal with because, as Ash said, they're.

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Speaker 3: Drunk little people.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, and so yeah, mums have kind of come to

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Speaker 6: us and said, oh, it's just really refreshing to hear

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Speaker 6: myself and my story reflected back in your content.

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Speaker 3: But we have people that aren't parents that listen.

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Speaker 7: Do we have a thing against pet parents, But that's

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Speaker 7: a story for another day, but we do. I have

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Speaker 7: met people that are like, I don't have kids, but

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Speaker 7: I like listening to you. So's wrong with you?

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Speaker 5: Guys?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, there's so much house out there.

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Speaker 1: Take the win where you can get them. For sure,

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Speaker 1: I'm not a parent, but I am going to be

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Speaker 1: a listener. From this point onward.

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Speaker 7: Okay, perfect, that's one more.

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Speaker 1: Okay, I feel like, let's sure I'm strange to money wins.

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Speaker 5: I think so well, there's some goodies this week. So first,

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Speaker 5: they've got a money win from Maggie, who said, I've

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Speaker 5: been eyeing up some mid century dining tables for some time,

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Speaker 5: and most of them sit around the eight hundred dollar mark.

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Speaker 5: I found someone Facebook marketplace that we're in immaculate condition

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Speaker 5: for one hundred bucks, hired at from Carshier for fifty

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Speaker 5: bucks to collect it, and made it at total of

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Speaker 5: one hundred and fifty dollars for a six to eight CE.

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Speaker 5: She's put in a photo. We love a photo, lovely

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Speaker 5: Facebook thread. Very mid century and I don't know if

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Speaker 5: anybody else loves them in century style. But she's absolutely

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Speaker 5: right that stuff is so expensive. It's absolutely insane. So

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Speaker 5: well done, Maggie.

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Speaker 3: Until you sit on it and it falls to pe.

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Speaker 1: Couple of screws or something, it's decoration, no sitting allow.

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Speaker 8: Yeah.

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Speaker 5: Next, I've got a money win from Jamie. It's short

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Speaker 5: but sweet, but she said, money win. My mortgage is

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Speaker 5: going to be paid off this Friday. Oh my god,

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Speaker 5: well done, Jay.

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Speaker 3: Very nice, exciting flex.

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Speaker 1: I'm interested to know what you're going to do with

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Speaker 1: the money now to do that?

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Speaker 3: Also, how old is she? When is by a first house?

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Speaker 1: We're going to be a whole lod of follow up

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Speaker 1: questions to get out of money.

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Speaker 3: That's a very good effort. I'm happy for it, but

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Speaker 3: I'm also like, a, well, I'm just going to go

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Speaker 3: home and pay my rent.

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Speaker 1: Seriously amazing.

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Speaker 5: Next, I've got money in from Georgie who said win

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Speaker 5: that I think Victoria and all of my fellow green

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Speaker 5: thumbs will appreciate. I bought a plant to add some

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Speaker 5: greenery to our apartment. When repotting it, I noticed it

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Speaker 5: was actually three separate plans in the one pot. So

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Speaker 5: now I've got three plans for the price of one.

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Speaker 3: Oh, Laura, Laura would absolutely lose her mind.

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Speaker 2: That.

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Speaker 7: It's like when you go shopping with your toddler and

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Speaker 7: you walk out and you haven't realized they've taken ship money.

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Speaker 6: Usually the chocolates are the perfect don't steal that, watch

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Speaker 6: don't take.

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Speaker 5: Friends are great for that. Next, we've got money in

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Speaker 5: from Gina who said I've got a small money in.

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Speaker 5: My uber on Friday was more expensive than I was

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Speaker 5: quoted because of traffic. I contested it through the app

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Speaker 5: and I got a refund.

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Speaker 1: Whole thing. Didn't even know you could do it.

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Speaker 7: Special love to complain about Uber stuff his personality. He goes, sorry,

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Speaker 7: it's actually it's actually a credit to it.

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Speaker 3: Actually, can I have a money win? Can I jump

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Speaker 3: in really quickly?

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Speaker 1: Please?

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Speaker 3: Okay?

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Speaker 6: Ash is right. I do like to complain, but for

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Speaker 6: the right reasons. The right reasons, like if I get

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Speaker 6: the wrong order, I'll be like, hey, I didn't order that.

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Speaker 3: Last night. I got some.

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Speaker 6: Tie delivered right delicious and it arrived it was a

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Speaker 6: salmon stir fry immediately.

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Speaker 3: No, yeah, first problem.

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Speaker 5: Okay, that's what you're ordering from the Thai restaurants to

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Speaker 5: the rose out.

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Speaker 3: Different strokes for different folks.

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Speaker 6: I'm sure there's people out there who like, we need

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Speaker 6: to stay strong, stay together. I took the lid off,

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Speaker 6: and straight away Laura was like, oh, what is that.

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Speaker 6: That's chicken.

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Speaker 3: That is fishy.

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Speaker 6: It was, and I smelled it and I was like, oh,

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Speaker 6: that's definitely that's not quite right. And I tasted it

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Speaker 6: and I was like, oh, it's not quite there.

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Speaker 3: It's on the turn. It's on the brink.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, I ate half of it, right, Oh, so.

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Speaker 3: I got I got somewhat of a meal.

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Speaker 6: I then complained because I said it was off, and

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Speaker 6: then I got it free.

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Speaker 3: You got it refunded. So I got a free half.

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Speaker 1: Meal that's really really good and.

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Speaker 3: I didn't have diarrhea today. I'm not sick.

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Speaker 1: Money when money when it can take some time, It

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Speaker 1: can take some time. You need to run out any point, that's.

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Speaker 3: The money win, right, Yeah, I got one off the

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Speaker 3: back of that.

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Speaker 7: We were in Brisbane, ordered the kid's pizza to the

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Speaker 7: hotel was saying it and it said that it had

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Speaker 7: turned up and it didn't, so I immediately went for

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Speaker 7: the refund. Twenty minutes later pizza turned up.

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Speaker 1: Money win.

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Speaker 3: How long did you money?

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Speaker 7: When I got it refunded? But then also because I

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Speaker 7: had Uber cash, got dinner last night.

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Speaker 3: Free double win?

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Speaker 8: Wow?

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Speaker 3: Right girl math winning over here?

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Speaker 7: These are all.

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Speaker 3: It was really confident.

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Speaker 1: That so much of the day.

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Speaker 7: Oh it's actually door dash amazing.

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Speaker 1: Well, I feel like that. Let's wrap it up there

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Speaker 1: and head into broake tips. I feel bad. I think

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Speaker 1: you've got a goodie for us, right, Okay, I do.

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Speaker 1: Unfortunately it's not Uber it's related. Is that Okay? That

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Speaker 1: like allowed off seam. Yeah, it's off se I'm really

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Speaker 1: going rogue you guys. Okay, So as always we do

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Speaker 1: have broke tips. Now Ash and Maddie Jay have come

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Speaker 1: with their own, so I'm just going to read out

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Speaker 1: one for the day. So this one comes from Maddie

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Speaker 1: who says, refill spray and white bottles with water when

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Speaker 1: they get down to half way, which I have a

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Speaker 1: great idea because they really are a little bit too

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Speaker 1: condensed at the start.

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Speaker 3: So I do that with body wash, yes, body.

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Speaker 1: Wash, shampoo, anything, because you don't like it's still all

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Speaker 1: in there. You know, when you're saving a lot of

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Speaker 1: not just money, but also you're saving the planet.

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Speaker 6: I've got a conspiracy theory if i can just jump

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Speaker 6: in for one second. Someone said that in other Scooper

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Speaker 6: for the powder for your washing the clothes. They were like,

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Speaker 6: that's actually that line they put on the Scooper to

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Speaker 6: say how much you need for a full load that

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Speaker 6: they're lying to us. They're saying you actually only need

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Speaker 6: half of that, but they put the line way above

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Speaker 6: because they want to encourage you.

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Speaker 3: To use more. You have to buy more. So I

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Speaker 3: only wash with half a scoop.

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Speaker 1: Dirty dogs, those shops, dude.

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Speaker 7: My wife goes through so much laundry powder sometimes I

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Speaker 7: think she's just doing washers for the sake of it.

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Speaker 7: Doesn't want to get out over the routine. Now that

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Speaker 7: she's like, can you hang the wash up? Opened up,

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Speaker 7: there's a pillowcase. Broke tip.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah over consumers that broad tip. Okay, what

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Speaker 1: are your broke tips?

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Speaker 7: You go first? You want me to go go first?

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Speaker 7: I've got one. I've got one. It's like how to

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Speaker 7: save money, and I've just figured this out because I've

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Speaker 7: done it. Now popular subscription service costs quite a little

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Speaker 7: bit per month. However, I was recently told about a

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Speaker 7: specific sports team that you can actually buy a membership

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Speaker 7: from and get this subscription for free for twelve months

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Speaker 7: now of the streaming service. The streaming service as well

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Speaker 7: as the membership. Now I'm a member of this particular

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Speaker 7: sports team. Now, don't support them, but it is one

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Speaker 7: off payment of two hundred and fifty dollars, which is

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Speaker 7: far less.

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Speaker 3: Than a full years worth of subscription of this dream.

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Speaker 6: Also, are there any other benefits from being a member

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Speaker 6: of this sport?

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Speaker 7: I can go to the games for the whole year

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Speaker 7: for free Western Sydney.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, because I'm a member from an entry level member.

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Speaker 1: Really saving actually quite a lot of money.

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Speaker 3: I've got a lanyard and everything.

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Speaker 1: There you go.

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Speaker 5: And now when someone asks who your teen is, you

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Speaker 5: can go. You know how bloody loves y.

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Speaker 7: Yes, I won't throw the subscription service under the bus.

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Speaker 3: I don't want them to find.

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Speaker 7: Out that's mine. That's it's actually quite a significant amount

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Speaker 7: of savings.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's actually really good.

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Speaker 5: We're gonna have to eive tell us off the air

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Speaker 5: and if anyone wants to know, we'll slide to a

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Speaker 5: DM because I just know that people are going to ask.

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Speaker 1: I have a feeling anyway. Sorry, I won't get into it,

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Speaker 1: but I can't.

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Speaker 3: Say anymore much. Want to get holder of every sports

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Speaker 3: team in Sydney.

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Speaker 1: Okay, what's yours?

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Speaker 6: My saving tip is what comes from my mom. And

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Speaker 6: for those who may not be aware, I'm one of

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Speaker 6: five kids. We were raised by a single parent, my

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Speaker 6: mom queen. So she's a teacher, not a big salary,

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Speaker 6: so you know we were We watched every dollar.

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Speaker 3: She makes up for an impersonality. She does she.

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Speaker 6: Does, but from a very young age, she used to

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Speaker 6: just on a Sunday she would do these really big cookups.

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Speaker 6: We would then live off that meal for bloody ages.

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Speaker 3: We have our freezing to just.

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Speaker 6: Be foot chock full of his frozen dishes. And the

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Speaker 6: two that she would always go for spaghetti bolonnaise and lasagna,

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Speaker 6: Oh my god.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 6: And also because it was fishion to cook right yeah yeah,

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Speaker 6: and they would have chili coon cahne.

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Speaker 3: It's mints killing me.

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Speaker 6: But but now that we're all adults and we're all

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Speaker 6: you know, financially secure, at this point, Mom still has

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Speaker 6: the same mentality to save money. So recently we went

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Speaker 6: on a holiday to rock Hampton, all of the family together.

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Speaker 6: It was my younger brother's birthday. And you know, rock

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Speaker 6: Hampton has supermarkets, it has restaurants, everything that we would have.

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Speaker 6: But there was a lot of us there, a lot

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Speaker 6: of kids, and my mom thought that the best thing

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Speaker 6: to do, not knowing what type of kitchen we would

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Speaker 6: have in the holiday house, she did a big cook

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Speaker 6: up and she in one bag that she checked in

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Speaker 6: on the flight. It was full of frozen lasagna and

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Speaker 6: spaghetti bolonnaise on the flight.

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Speaker 3: Whenever we go on.

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Speaker 6: A holiday, my mom will bring with her enough food

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Speaker 6: so we don't have to eat out at all.

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Speaker 1: You don't have a heart to say, mum, that's kind

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Speaker 1: of the point of the holidays.

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Speaker 6: I was like, come on, this is ridiculous, Mum, Like,

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Speaker 6: we don't need we don't need to bring it along.

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Speaker 6: And on this particular flight they lost our luggage.

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Speaker 3: It was a morning flight, not many.

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Speaker 6: Flights out to Rockhampton, so we didn't get the bags

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Speaker 6: back until like eleven o'clock that evening. If he thought,

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Speaker 6: I was like, we're not going to we just will

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Speaker 6: throw out the food because it's you know, it's surely

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Speaker 6: it's not good to eat anyway.

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Speaker 3: We all ate it a ton of money.

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Speaker 1: It would have been just right by the time you

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Speaker 1: got it. We're so ready to by that point nothing.

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Speaker 1: That's a great, great, great broke tip.

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Speaker 3: Actually, it's a good story that I've heard. I've heard

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Speaker 3: bits of that story before, and it's I love that story.

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Speaker 5: If you had kids that do that thing where they

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Speaker 5: only eat one meal, that would be like.

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Speaker 1: Your saving grace.

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Speaker 5: Like if you had a kid who's like, all I

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Speaker 5: want is to be like.

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Speaker 8: Nothing is ideal, eating nothing is better, So hard to

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Speaker 8: get your kids to eat, you know, Like, so we

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Speaker 8: were away right and I got a steak and my

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Speaker 8: youngest Macy, was like, I want some.

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Speaker 7: I was like, okay, cool sounds loved it, made stake

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Speaker 7: at home. Didn't want to bar it for that environment.

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Speaker 7: You guys, Micheline star Chef.

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't have thought that you're not. I mean anyway,

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Speaker 1: Michelin Star Chef, I'm.

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Speaker 7: Given the bear sort of Oh yeah, yeah, absolutely chef.

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Speaker 7: So this is off the so off the back of

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Speaker 7: our podcast, we joke about something that I have done

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Speaker 7: since having children is that I've never thrown well, hang on.

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Speaker 3: It's hard to know if this is genius or sad.

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Speaker 1: This is people to decide.

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Speaker 7: Yeah, now I feel like it's sad. It is sad

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Speaker 7: for them, not for me. I'm enjoying it. It's now

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Speaker 7: a sport for me. This I go every year just

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Speaker 7: with one goal. Okay, so since having kids, I have

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Speaker 7: never thrown them a birthday party?

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Speaker 1: How are your kids?

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Speaker 3: Either of them? Five?

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Speaker 1: And okay, five is pushing you luck.

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Speaker 7: I'm deep in it. I'm deeping it now. But like

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Speaker 7: I said, it's an Olympic sport for me now. So

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Speaker 7: the reason I don't do that, and how I get

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Speaker 7: around it is I take my kids to other people's

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Speaker 7: birthday parties and tell them it's their party as well.

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Speaker 7: And it's gotten to the point where I have my

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Speaker 7: daughter who's two, and one of my really good friends

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Speaker 7: has a son who's born on the same day but

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Speaker 7: a year later, so he's one.

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Speaker 3: So we recently went.

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Speaker 7: To his first birthday, and it's such an ongoing joke

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Speaker 7: amongst my friends and us on the podcast that midway

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Speaker 7: through the Happy Birthday where they went happy birth to bo,

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Speaker 7: I just threw out there and May and then they

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Speaker 7: whipped out another cake. Oh, and I sung Macy Happy Birthday.

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Speaker 7: And I success because it was in November. I successfully

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Speaker 7: had got through another year of not throwing my kid's

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Speaker 7: a birthday party, hence saving me all the money and stress. Yes,

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Speaker 7: I'm throwing a birthday are very expensive.

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Speaker 3: I wouldn't know.

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Speaker 1: You would get to a point where you're inviting her

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Speaker 1: friends to other people's birthday. Now that's going to be that.

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Speaker 3: I'm just going to make sure she's friends with everyone.

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Speaker 6: Well, most those birthday parties are in parks, aren't they.

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Speaker 6: You just turn up, so it's not it's easy to

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Speaker 6: invite other games as long as it's a round about

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Speaker 6: the right month. If I get a birthday, invite a

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Speaker 6: round about.

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Speaker 7: Yeah it's Oscar had about twelve birthdays last year.

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Speaker 3: Spoil.

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Speaker 7: He's about to start work. Yeah, I honestly haven't spent

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Speaker 7: a sen on birthdays.

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Speaker 5: Birthdays are expensive for kids. There you go, that's a

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Speaker 5: good little brute tip for here. I don't know how

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Speaker 5: many people are going to take you up on that, but.

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Speaker 3: Those parents that are expecting start early.

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Speaker 1: Yes, plan the due date around someone else's or we

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Speaker 1: could actually do that for ourselves. I might do that

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Speaker 1: this year with one of my friends. I'm going to

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Speaker 1: do that.

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Speaker 5: Well, let's go to a really quick break and when

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Speaker 5: we come back, we are going to chat more about kids.

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Speaker 5: We're going to talk about where the pocket money is

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00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:08,480
Speaker 5: a good idea, and we're also going to chat about

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Speaker 5: managing expectations with children.

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Speaker 1: That maybe aren't your own. So don't go anywhere. Welcome

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Speaker 1: back everyone. Here's our money dilemma.

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Speaker 4: Hi, there, have you got a money dilemma you just

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00:19:23,880 --> 00:19:26,400
Speaker 4: can't solve The She's on the Money team is here

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00:19:26,440 --> 00:19:26,800
Speaker 4: to help.

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00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:28,159
Speaker 1: Every week we.

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00:19:28,080 --> 00:19:30,840
Speaker 4: Tackle your dilemmas, both big and small. To answer your

403
00:19:30,880 --> 00:19:34,360
Speaker 4: most burning money, career and life questions. To get involved,

404
00:19:34,359 --> 00:19:36,520
Speaker 4: simply head to our website and leave us a short

405
00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:39,800
Speaker 4: voice recording and you might just find yourself on the show. Now,

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00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:43,720
Speaker 4: let's take a listen to this week's money dilemma.

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Speaker 9: Hi, guys, wanted to write him with a bit of

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Speaker 9: dilemma I'm having at the moment. So my hobby and

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Speaker 9: I we've got a bit of opposing views on pocket.

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Speaker 3: Money for our eleven year old son.

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Speaker 9: So up until now, he's been you know, generally really

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Speaker 9: sweet and have for kid, always cleans up his room

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Speaker 9: and helps out with really basic things. You know, when

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00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:04,080
Speaker 9: I ask him to do something, he does it, and

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Speaker 9: of course we give him when you know, what he

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00:20:06,560 --> 00:20:09,640
Speaker 9: wants when he needs money, so a little tree, going

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Speaker 9: to the movie, something like that. I'm pretty keen for

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Speaker 9: this to continue. My thought being that it's important that

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Speaker 9: he's expected to help with household chores and not you know,

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Speaker 9: you don't specifically get money for those tasks. It's something

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00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:23,840
Speaker 9: that you should contribute to the household. However, my husband

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00:20:24,040 --> 00:20:26,440
Speaker 9: wants to up the chores, so make him do more

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00:20:26,800 --> 00:20:28,959
Speaker 9: and give him a certain amount of money as he

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Speaker 9: thinks this will teach him kind of a better value

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Speaker 9: for money and hard work. And we're at a bit

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Speaker 9: of an impasse, and I was just wondering what you

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Speaker 9: all think.

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Speaker 5: You know, what really excited to me is having people

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Speaker 5: who are actually parents here, because we have answered questions

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Speaker 5: about kids in the past, and neither of us I mean,

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Speaker 5: just the disease. Maybe the perspective is a little bit different.

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Speaker 7: I mean, our kids are much younger, but we mine

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Speaker 7: are like they're at the age where it's like, he's

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Speaker 7: a good example for my son. He was so scared

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Speaker 7: or not scared. He just didn't want to cut his hair.

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Speaker 7: So I said, you cut your hair, you'll get rewarded

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00:21:01,359 --> 00:21:03,199
Speaker 7: with something. So now what he does is he's like,

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Speaker 7: I need a headcut to be rewarded. I think she

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00:21:06,880 --> 00:21:10,840
Speaker 7: says there, she's like, he wants to up the chores. Yep,

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00:21:11,480 --> 00:21:13,119
Speaker 7: I don't see if he wants to up it. I

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Speaker 7: think the kids should be compensated.

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Speaker 1: We're all about people being paid for the work that

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Speaker 1: they do.

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Speaker 7: Here on this podcast, he's happy if she's already happy

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Speaker 7: with him doing those those low lying activities, the ship

446
00:21:24,760 --> 00:21:27,240
Speaker 7: kicker activities, and then he's like, well, I want him

447
00:21:27,240 --> 00:21:28,320
Speaker 7: to do more important work.

448
00:21:28,520 --> 00:21:29,560
Speaker 3: At least you get paid for it.

449
00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:34,000
Speaker 1: Plow the plow the field or whatever.

450
00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:37,439
Speaker 6: I kind of agree with you. I do think as

451
00:21:37,440 --> 00:21:41,400
Speaker 6: well that she's got this unicorn child. Oh ye, first

452
00:21:41,440 --> 00:21:43,760
Speaker 6: of all, congratulations on winning a lottery.

453
00:21:43,760 --> 00:21:44,600
Speaker 3: Write a book the.

454
00:21:44,560 --> 00:21:47,480
Speaker 6: Best kid, Yeah, because that does not happen often. I

455
00:21:47,560 --> 00:21:50,840
Speaker 6: grew up having to have like a star chart, and

456
00:21:50,880 --> 00:21:54,440
Speaker 6: so we had we had certain jobs. There was one

457
00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:56,520
Speaker 6: that we had a little plastic bag and we had

458
00:21:56,520 --> 00:21:58,679
Speaker 6: to fill it with weeds, and then you know, a

459
00:21:58,680 --> 00:22:01,480
Speaker 6: certain number of stars would then get you something that

460
00:22:01,480 --> 00:22:03,399
Speaker 6: you wanted at the end of the week, and that

461
00:22:03,440 --> 00:22:05,840
Speaker 6: then progressed when we were older, going into you know,

462
00:22:05,840 --> 00:22:08,080
Speaker 6: like year seven, year eight, we would get an amount of.

463
00:22:08,040 --> 00:22:13,359
Speaker 3: Pocket money was part of the cartel whipping. It's just

464
00:22:13,560 --> 00:22:15,439
Speaker 3: like his bag full of weise.

465
00:22:19,119 --> 00:22:23,080
Speaker 6: We definitely ask kids we needed to have some type

466
00:22:23,119 --> 00:22:25,960
Speaker 6: of incentive to get those jobs done, the shitty ones

467
00:22:26,000 --> 00:22:29,120
Speaker 6: like the cleaning the toilet, doing the gardening, washing the car,

468
00:22:29,240 --> 00:22:31,360
Speaker 6: things that we didn't really enjoy. And it was good

469
00:22:31,359 --> 00:22:33,439
Speaker 6: for me because it taught me, you know, you had

470
00:22:33,480 --> 00:22:35,119
Speaker 6: to if you want something, you got to put in

471
00:22:35,160 --> 00:22:36,600
Speaker 6: the effort. You've got to get the work done a

472
00:22:36,640 --> 00:22:39,600
Speaker 6: bit of discipline. But then also eventually, when I was

473
00:22:40,200 --> 00:22:43,199
Speaker 6: in my early teens, I could then start saving for

474
00:22:43,280 --> 00:22:46,400
Speaker 6: money and I understood like how to use money and yeah,

475
00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:48,879
Speaker 6: so it was a good foundation for me. But I

476
00:22:48,920 --> 00:22:50,680
Speaker 6: do think the risk is if you've got a kid

477
00:22:50,680 --> 00:22:57,240
Speaker 6: who's already doing the work happily, like don't rock the boat.

478
00:22:57,920 --> 00:23:02,840
Speaker 7: Yeah, I think on the work, they kind of answer

479
00:23:02,920 --> 00:23:05,560
Speaker 7: their own question by adding their like he wants them

480
00:23:05,560 --> 00:23:08,080
Speaker 7: to do more, then you get compensated. So the things

481
00:23:08,119 --> 00:23:11,359
Speaker 7: that he's doing for free, they're still free chores.

482
00:23:11,680 --> 00:23:13,560
Speaker 6: But the kid, the kid doesn't want to be compensated.

483
00:23:13,760 --> 00:23:15,560
Speaker 6: The dad saying you should be compensated. The kid's not

484
00:23:15,600 --> 00:23:21,520
Speaker 6: complaining work. The kid until he starts to understand take

485
00:23:21,560 --> 00:23:23,760
Speaker 6: an advantage, he's exactly yeah.

486
00:23:24,520 --> 00:23:26,960
Speaker 3: Then it's like then he's just going to be bitter.

487
00:23:27,080 --> 00:23:29,000
Speaker 3: He's going to start a union. He's not. He's going

488
00:23:29,040 --> 00:23:32,440
Speaker 3: to start a union. He's like a robot. Think of that.

489
00:23:33,480 --> 00:23:35,160
Speaker 7: Think of the knock on effects. It's going to start

490
00:23:35,160 --> 00:23:36,560
Speaker 7: a union. It's going to get his buddies over and

491
00:23:36,600 --> 00:23:37,840
Speaker 7: they're going to rally out the front.

492
00:23:37,960 --> 00:23:41,800
Speaker 3: I disagree, protest, get a pick. It going at some point.

493
00:23:42,080 --> 00:23:44,440
Speaker 6: I think, at some point asking for better conditions it's good,

494
00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:47,239
Speaker 6: and it's good. It's good to have some type of

495
00:23:47,800 --> 00:23:48,840
Speaker 6: monetary exchange.

496
00:23:48,920 --> 00:23:50,600
Speaker 7: Yeah, I think so. I think so they can learn

497
00:23:50,640 --> 00:23:52,960
Speaker 7: the value of money. That much that is, that's up

498
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:54,679
Speaker 7: to them. How much money they've got, I don't know.

499
00:23:55,320 --> 00:23:56,080
Speaker 3: Look, if he.

500
00:23:56,080 --> 00:23:58,160
Speaker 7: Doesn't want to do the work money, If he doesn't

501
00:23:58,160 --> 00:23:59,159
Speaker 7: want to do the work, I'll do it.

502
00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:02,480
Speaker 5: We could all use the extra cash.

503
00:24:02,640 --> 00:24:06,719
Speaker 3: Do I get pocket money? I can't remember.

504
00:24:07,359 --> 00:24:11,000
Speaker 1: See there you go, remember, don't give them any money?

505
00:24:10,760 --> 00:24:13,840
Speaker 3: Say that I would have. Yeah, I don't remember anything

506
00:24:14,040 --> 00:24:14,960
Speaker 3: any specifics.

507
00:24:15,480 --> 00:24:19,040
Speaker 7: Actually, yeah, my sister got paid for making the school lunches.

508
00:24:19,119 --> 00:24:21,720
Speaker 3: She's older. Her lunches were ship.

509
00:24:26,240 --> 00:24:31,280
Speaker 1: Paid those capo dogs. So I think, I just I

510
00:24:31,320 --> 00:24:35,400
Speaker 1: don't know. Like, obviously we don't have children together or separately.

511
00:24:36,119 --> 00:24:37,760
Speaker 3: Would you pay a small child to come to your

512
00:24:37,760 --> 00:24:38,440
Speaker 3: house and do work?

513
00:24:38,600 --> 00:24:41,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, I would. But I think also there are other

514
00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:43,160
Speaker 1: ways that you can be like as you were saying,

515
00:24:43,160 --> 00:24:44,800
Speaker 1: like with the star chart and stuff, there are otherwise

516
00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:47,840
Speaker 1: you can feel like you've achieved something by doing these

517
00:24:47,840 --> 00:24:50,520
Speaker 1: small things. So I think that, like, you know, rewarding

518
00:24:50,920 --> 00:24:54,240
Speaker 1: your child in other ways and if you're already kind

519
00:24:54,240 --> 00:24:56,520
Speaker 1: of like getting everything he needs if you if you

520
00:24:56,560 --> 00:24:58,760
Speaker 1: need to go to the movies or not needs to

521
00:24:58,800 --> 00:25:00,439
Speaker 1: go to the movies. If you want to go to movies,

522
00:25:00,880 --> 00:25:02,560
Speaker 1: you give him money for it. You know, things like that.

523
00:25:02,640 --> 00:25:04,679
Speaker 1: It's like, you know, there's already this kind of like

524
00:25:04,760 --> 00:25:06,520
Speaker 1: really nice dynamic that you've got going on. I don't

525
00:25:06,520 --> 00:25:09,840
Speaker 1: think it's necessary, but it's a different story. If you

526
00:25:09,880 --> 00:25:13,240
Speaker 1: are wanting to start teaching financial literacy, and if that's

527
00:25:13,240 --> 00:25:15,560
Speaker 1: what you are want to do eventually, that's what you

528
00:25:15,560 --> 00:25:17,040
Speaker 1: want to do. Now you think that he's in a

529
00:25:17,359 --> 00:25:20,359
Speaker 1: he has capacity to understand that right now, then go ahead.

530
00:25:21,280 --> 00:25:24,760
Speaker 1: If not, I think it's fine to just kind of like,

531
00:25:25,080 --> 00:25:26,960
Speaker 1: because chores are expected, you're going to have to do

532
00:25:27,040 --> 00:25:30,520
Speaker 1: chorores the rest of your life. Yeah. So I don't know,

533
00:25:30,600 --> 00:25:32,680
Speaker 1: but that's just me. I don't have a single child, so.

534
00:25:33,800 --> 00:25:41,840
Speaker 5: No, I as a as a pet parent, she was attacked, No,

535
00:25:41,920 --> 00:25:45,399
Speaker 5: I agree. I think that the important thing is is

536
00:25:46,119 --> 00:25:48,199
Speaker 5: as an adult, I think you can really tell the

537
00:25:48,240 --> 00:25:51,560
Speaker 5: difference between people who had to work for things as

538
00:25:51,560 --> 00:25:53,480
Speaker 5: a child and people who didn't. Like I think it's

539
00:25:53,680 --> 00:25:56,879
Speaker 5: really obvious as you get older, the people who learned

540
00:25:56,960 --> 00:25:59,720
Speaker 5: those lessons and actually have to work for things, versus

541
00:25:59,760 --> 00:26:02,679
Speaker 5: the people who maybe were in more affluent situations or

542
00:26:02,760 --> 00:26:05,199
Speaker 5: their parents were a bit more cruisy and happy to

543
00:26:05,240 --> 00:26:07,400
Speaker 5: just let them do as they did. I think it

544
00:26:07,680 --> 00:26:12,000
Speaker 5: really ultimately raises two different types of people. And as

545
00:26:12,040 --> 00:26:13,719
Speaker 5: you were saying, like, you come to a point in

546
00:26:13,760 --> 00:26:16,040
Speaker 5: life where unfortunately we all have to work for a living,

547
00:26:16,160 --> 00:26:19,439
Speaker 5: and so I think getting them to earn them pocket

548
00:26:19,440 --> 00:26:22,000
Speaker 5: money sets them up to understand the way that the

549
00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:25,360
Speaker 5: world works. Like, in addition to the financial literacy benefits,

550
00:26:25,359 --> 00:26:28,000
Speaker 5: I think it really teaches you like there are shit jobs,

551
00:26:28,040 --> 00:26:29,600
Speaker 5: like sometimes you don't want to turn up and do

552
00:26:29,640 --> 00:26:31,080
Speaker 5: what you have to do, but you got to do it,

553
00:26:31,160 --> 00:26:34,520
Speaker 5: and so I think it really teaches those skills in

554
00:26:34,560 --> 00:26:38,359
Speaker 5: addition to as you were saying, like understanding that, you know,

555
00:26:38,640 --> 00:26:40,800
Speaker 5: the exchange between doing a job and earning money and

556
00:26:41,040 --> 00:26:43,439
Speaker 5: the concept of saving that money up to purchase something

557
00:26:43,480 --> 00:26:45,280
Speaker 5: like those are all really good lessons. But I think

558
00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:48,119
Speaker 5: more than anything it helps I mean, I don't have

559
00:26:48,160 --> 00:26:50,880
Speaker 5: a kid, so I can't say, but having observed people

560
00:26:50,920 --> 00:26:53,320
Speaker 5: as adults, I think the people who didn't necessarily have

561
00:26:53,359 --> 00:26:55,600
Speaker 5: to work for things are often not as well adjusted

562
00:26:55,680 --> 00:26:57,679
Speaker 5: or as well equipped for the things that they have

563
00:26:57,720 --> 00:26:58,639
Speaker 5: to do later in life.

564
00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:00,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, personal perspective.

565
00:27:00,640 --> 00:27:01,920
Speaker 3: I mean you can tell you that it's the ones

566
00:27:01,960 --> 00:27:05,720
Speaker 3: that didn't have to do anything with just like that guy.

567
00:27:05,920 --> 00:27:09,720
Speaker 6: Yeah one, the ones that don't bring frozen lasagna on holiday.

568
00:27:09,400 --> 00:27:12,479
Speaker 7: Resilient, like I'm just going to buy fresh lazagna that.

569
00:27:14,760 --> 00:27:14,960
Speaker 8: Yeah.

570
00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:16,520
Speaker 5: So I think like it's and it's hard if you

571
00:27:16,560 --> 00:27:18,359
Speaker 5: and your husband, it's ultimately it's your kid and you

572
00:27:18,359 --> 00:27:20,000
Speaker 5: guys have to come to an agreement. Maybe there's a

573
00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:23,000
Speaker 5: middle ground where maybe it starts off as an optional. Hey,

574
00:27:23,040 --> 00:27:25,479
Speaker 5: if you want some extra money to spend, you know,

575
00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:27,280
Speaker 5: we cover all the things that you need, We cover

576
00:27:27,320 --> 00:27:28,560
Speaker 5: what we've been doing. If you want a bit of

577
00:27:28,560 --> 00:27:31,240
Speaker 5: extra cash, you can earn that by doing a chore

578
00:27:31,320 --> 00:27:33,200
Speaker 5: and maybe you kind of can introduce it that way

579
00:27:33,240 --> 00:27:35,200
Speaker 5: and transition over see how it goes.

580
00:27:35,280 --> 00:27:38,200
Speaker 7: But I do like to teach them worth work ethic

581
00:27:38,240 --> 00:27:40,720
Speaker 7: because they can start like fifteen hour he's eleven.

582
00:27:40,920 --> 00:27:42,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, a few more years and he's going to be

583
00:27:42,520 --> 00:27:43,040
Speaker 3: in the trenches.

584
00:27:43,520 --> 00:27:45,399
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's going to be working at Red Rooster.

585
00:27:45,560 --> 00:27:51,120
Speaker 5: McDonald's absolutely triggering to think, I don't know but I

586
00:27:51,160 --> 00:27:54,360
Speaker 5: totally agree. I think not to be a little monotonous,

587
00:27:54,359 --> 00:27:55,840
Speaker 5: but I do want to talk about kids a bit more.

588
00:27:55,840 --> 00:27:57,119
Speaker 1: While we've got the experts in.

589
00:27:57,119 --> 00:27:59,240
Speaker 5: The room, I think you could never ask, might as

590
00:27:59,240 --> 00:28:03,880
Speaker 5: well take advantag So let's get into this week's juicy DM,

591
00:28:03,920 --> 00:28:06,760
Speaker 5: which actually caused some conversation at our family dinner this week.

592
00:28:06,880 --> 00:28:10,760
Speaker 5: Oh so, our listener said, I'm an auntie to two

593
00:28:10,880 --> 00:28:13,639
Speaker 5: beautiful nieces, but they are spoilt rotten by my brother

594
00:28:13,720 --> 00:28:16,080
Speaker 5: and his wife. The girls are twelve and ten and

595
00:28:16,119 --> 00:28:19,200
Speaker 5: are getting really obsessed with materialistic things, and I see

596
00:28:19,240 --> 00:28:22,119
Speaker 5: a real pattern of excessive spending in the girls. The

597
00:28:22,200 --> 00:28:23,919
Speaker 5: other day, I took the girls to a movie and

598
00:28:23,960 --> 00:28:25,960
Speaker 5: to the shops, where they insisted on going into their

599
00:28:26,040 --> 00:28:29,160
Speaker 5: favorite shop, Mecca. They both found items that were over

600
00:28:29,240 --> 00:28:32,760
Speaker 5: one hundred dollars and expected me to purchase them for them.

601
00:28:33,160 --> 00:28:34,960
Speaker 5: When I told them that that would not be happening,

602
00:28:35,000 --> 00:28:37,639
Speaker 5: they had massive tantrums and got very upset with me,

603
00:28:37,720 --> 00:28:41,120
Speaker 5: saying Mum or Dad would never say no. I'm worried

604
00:28:41,120 --> 00:28:43,720
Speaker 5: my brother isn't teaching the girls good values around money,

605
00:28:43,760 --> 00:28:46,200
Speaker 5: and so my question is can I say something to

606
00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:48,520
Speaker 5: them or is it really not my place to tell

607
00:28:48,560 --> 00:28:51,640
Speaker 5: them how to parent. Will they get defensive and be offended?

608
00:28:51,960 --> 00:28:54,040
Speaker 5: It is their kids, after all, But I'm worried that

609
00:28:54,080 --> 00:28:56,880
Speaker 5: they haven't realized the lessons they're teaching the girls around money,

610
00:28:57,080 --> 00:28:58,760
Speaker 5: and they might need someone to give them a bit

611
00:28:58,800 --> 00:28:59,880
Speaker 5: of a reality check.

612
00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:07,600
Speaker 7: So yeah, I think, like, look, cland none of your

613
00:29:07,640 --> 00:29:11,600
Speaker 7: business as well, like, but also you don't want to

614
00:29:12,360 --> 00:29:14,240
Speaker 7: if you set the expectation what it's going to be

615
00:29:14,280 --> 00:29:17,920
Speaker 7: like with you, that's fine, but you can't really, like,

616
00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:22,040
Speaker 7: you can't really go and tell your sister or your brother, sorry,

617
00:29:22,040 --> 00:29:23,800
Speaker 7: how to parent that.

618
00:29:24,240 --> 00:29:27,760
Speaker 6: Well, it depends on the relationship that you have, Like

619
00:29:27,840 --> 00:29:30,160
Speaker 6: I guess there could be a situation where they could

620
00:29:30,160 --> 00:29:32,920
Speaker 6: be very responsive to getting that type of feedback. But

621
00:29:33,000 --> 00:29:36,120
Speaker 6: you would assume based on how I am, based on

622
00:29:36,160 --> 00:29:39,160
Speaker 6: how you are. Most parents out there, taking any type

623
00:29:39,200 --> 00:29:41,880
Speaker 6: of criticism from a family member is always going to

624
00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:42,479
Speaker 6: end badly.

625
00:29:44,280 --> 00:29:46,800
Speaker 7: Yeah, nine times out of ten, Like as much as

626
00:29:46,800 --> 00:29:48,440
Speaker 7: you can try and sugarcoat it, like, how are you

627
00:29:48,440 --> 00:29:50,400
Speaker 7: supposed to say your kids are spoiled?

628
00:29:50,440 --> 00:29:52,280
Speaker 3: Little shit? Yeah? How you're supposed to say that?

629
00:29:52,600 --> 00:29:52,840
Speaker 8: Likely?

630
00:29:53,080 --> 00:29:57,400
Speaker 6: I agree with her concerns. I think, oh yeah, there's

631
00:29:57,440 --> 00:30:01,000
Speaker 6: no question that she is likely going to be these

632
00:30:01,120 --> 00:30:03,360
Speaker 6: children are going to grow up to being title little brats.

633
00:30:03,440 --> 00:30:05,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, but like, also what sort of person is that

634
00:30:05,720 --> 00:30:06,720
Speaker 3: is the auntie as well?

635
00:30:06,720 --> 00:30:09,960
Speaker 7: If it's like what, like her value is obviously very

636
00:30:09,960 --> 00:30:11,000
Speaker 7: different to her brothers.

637
00:30:11,080 --> 00:30:13,640
Speaker 3: How is their upbringing any different? Or is she just

638
00:30:13,720 --> 00:30:15,520
Speaker 3: on a high horse or I don't know, Well, I

639
00:30:15,520 --> 00:30:18,440
Speaker 3: think but I or she no child? Is she going

640
00:30:18,480 --> 00:30:19,040
Speaker 3: to Mecca? Hang?

641
00:30:19,080 --> 00:30:20,680
Speaker 6: I don't think any child should go to Mecca. It

642
00:30:20,680 --> 00:30:23,040
Speaker 6: doesn't matter how you've been brought up. Shouldn't be getting

643
00:30:23,040 --> 00:30:26,440
Speaker 6: a hundred bucks off the back of anything, not saying

644
00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:29,880
Speaker 6: I think like as a as a benchmark rule, like

645
00:30:29,920 --> 00:30:32,560
Speaker 6: I don't agree with it, but unfortunately that's not enough

646
00:30:32,600 --> 00:30:35,000
Speaker 6: to warrant you know, you stepping in and being like

647
00:30:35,040 --> 00:30:36,360
Speaker 6: you're being I don't agree with your.

648
00:30:37,200 --> 00:30:39,520
Speaker 7: Shit too, because all their friends could be getting Mecca

649
00:30:39,560 --> 00:30:41,479
Speaker 7: and they were like, well mom and dad aren't here,

650
00:30:41,520 --> 00:30:42,760
Speaker 7: let's try and bum steer out.

651
00:30:43,200 --> 00:30:44,600
Speaker 3: You don't know, but.

652
00:30:44,560 --> 00:30:47,840
Speaker 7: I think, like it's not worth risking the relationship with

653
00:30:47,840 --> 00:30:49,480
Speaker 7: the rest of the family when they need to work

654
00:30:49,480 --> 00:30:50,200
Speaker 7: it out on their own.

655
00:30:50,760 --> 00:30:52,480
Speaker 3: They need to work out that their kids are spoiled

656
00:30:52,480 --> 00:30:53,560
Speaker 3: little shit on their own.

657
00:30:53,920 --> 00:30:57,800
Speaker 6: As like, as long as those kids are happy and

658
00:30:57,960 --> 00:31:02,360
Speaker 6: healthy and well fed. Unfortunately you can't.

659
00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:04,680
Speaker 7: It's kind of like the rule you say, everything right,

660
00:31:04,680 --> 00:31:06,479
Speaker 7: as long as the kids are happy and healthy and welfare,

661
00:31:06,480 --> 00:31:10,080
Speaker 7: which is true. I mean, I don't know these people personally,

662
00:31:10,120 --> 00:31:13,680
Speaker 7: so I would say, yeah, like, I agree with you

663
00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:15,840
Speaker 7: if they're happy and healthy, but also maybe just butt

664
00:31:15,880 --> 00:31:16,280
Speaker 7: out a bit.

665
00:31:16,480 --> 00:31:16,760
Speaker 1: Yeah.

666
00:31:16,800 --> 00:31:18,880
Speaker 5: What came up at the dinner table with my sister

667
00:31:18,920 --> 00:31:21,840
Speaker 5: in law, who hilariously I have two nieces, and what

668
00:31:21,920 --> 00:31:24,560
Speaker 5: she brought up was the fact that often at that

669
00:31:24,680 --> 00:31:27,120
Speaker 5: age they test the boundary. So it could very well

670
00:31:27,160 --> 00:31:29,840
Speaker 5: be that mum and dad wouldn't spend the money at

671
00:31:29,880 --> 00:31:31,840
Speaker 5: Mecca or wouldn't do that, but the girls are just

672
00:31:31,880 --> 00:31:32,840
Speaker 5: trying it on to see.

673
00:31:32,880 --> 00:31:33,640
Speaker 1: Oh well, maybe be.

674
00:31:33,640 --> 00:31:37,520
Speaker 5: Said, maybe the auntie is gonna be like, oh else,

675
00:31:37,520 --> 00:31:40,160
Speaker 5: that's what mum and dad will do. By all means, yeah,

676
00:31:40,320 --> 00:31:42,040
Speaker 5: as someone who doesn't have kids, and maybe it's not

677
00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:44,600
Speaker 5: my place to say, but I do think it's worth

678
00:31:44,880 --> 00:31:49,640
Speaker 5: maybe gently raising the conversation or raising your concerns, even

679
00:31:49,680 --> 00:31:52,720
Speaker 5: just sharing the story of what happened exactly.

680
00:31:52,800 --> 00:31:56,360
Speaker 6: I think it's a manipulators too, Yeah, I mean Marley

681
00:31:56,400 --> 00:31:58,560
Speaker 6: and Lola that we've had before with the babysitters called

682
00:31:58,600 --> 00:32:01,480
Speaker 6: us up and said Marley said that she's allowed to

683
00:32:01,480 --> 00:32:05,880
Speaker 6: have a full block of chocolate. I'm like, what, no chance,

684
00:32:05,920 --> 00:32:09,400
Speaker 6: And Mary's like, oh sorry, Mi'm st sorry.

685
00:32:09,400 --> 00:32:11,320
Speaker 3: I didn't think should actually call me out on that.

686
00:32:11,680 --> 00:32:14,880
Speaker 5: So I almost think maybe it's worth even just letting

687
00:32:15,160 --> 00:32:17,760
Speaker 5: your brother know, your sister in law know the story

688
00:32:17,800 --> 00:32:19,920
Speaker 5: of what happens, like, hey, we want to know this happened.

689
00:32:20,600 --> 00:32:22,520
Speaker 1: You know, wasn't sure what to do because, to.

690
00:32:22,440 --> 00:32:24,600
Speaker 5: Be honest, if my nieces did that to me, like

691
00:32:24,760 --> 00:32:26,600
Speaker 5: especially if they started to get a bit towy in

692
00:32:26,640 --> 00:32:29,240
Speaker 5: the store, I'd have a little meltdown, like I wouldn't

693
00:32:29,240 --> 00:32:31,360
Speaker 5: know what to do, right, Like I don't have kids,

694
00:32:31,360 --> 00:32:32,880
Speaker 5: you know what I mean, Like I would be embarrassed,

695
00:32:32,920 --> 00:32:34,480
Speaker 5: and I would just be like, okay, like whatever you want,

696
00:32:34,560 --> 00:32:36,560
Speaker 5: let's get out of here, like let's get done, and

697
00:32:36,640 --> 00:32:39,000
Speaker 5: so like I can I almost feel like sharing the

698
00:32:39,000 --> 00:32:41,040
Speaker 5: perspective of saying, hey, like if I'm going to take

699
00:32:41,080 --> 00:32:42,600
Speaker 5: the girls out or if I'm going to do whatever,

700
00:32:43,280 --> 00:32:45,720
Speaker 5: like that's not really something that can happen because I'm

701
00:32:45,720 --> 00:32:47,880
Speaker 5: not equipped to handle it or I'm not prepared to

702
00:32:47,920 --> 00:32:50,200
Speaker 5: spend that, Like, I think there's something in it.

703
00:32:50,640 --> 00:32:52,880
Speaker 7: You could tell the story like, yeah, like that happened

704
00:32:52,880 --> 00:32:54,280
Speaker 7: with that in a non judge way.

705
00:32:54,360 --> 00:32:55,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, look, I would agree with that.

706
00:32:55,800 --> 00:32:58,280
Speaker 7: I suppose, just to see you could gauge what the

707
00:32:58,320 --> 00:33:00,000
Speaker 7: reaction would be before you start to.

708
00:33:00,360 --> 00:33:02,000
Speaker 1: Read the room a little bit.

709
00:33:02,320 --> 00:33:04,960
Speaker 5: Yes, I think you can flag it without necessarily coming

710
00:33:04,960 --> 00:33:07,000
Speaker 5: in and being like, hey, your girls are little shits

711
00:33:07,000 --> 00:33:08,840
Speaker 5: and they're really entitled and blah blah. Like I think

712
00:33:08,880 --> 00:33:10,840
Speaker 5: you could just maybe bring it up and have the

713
00:33:10,880 --> 00:33:13,320
Speaker 5: conversation and see what happens from there. Because they also

714
00:33:13,360 --> 00:33:15,200
Speaker 5: think it's very valid for you to not want to

715
00:33:15,200 --> 00:33:17,360
Speaker 5: spend that money. And if you're like me and you're

716
00:33:17,400 --> 00:33:19,479
Speaker 5: not sure what to do in that situation, I can

717
00:33:19,480 --> 00:33:21,080
Speaker 5: see how that would be kind of hard to handle.

718
00:33:21,560 --> 00:33:24,080
Speaker 1: Absolutely. I also think too, like, no one really needs

719
00:33:24,120 --> 00:33:25,760
Speaker 1: to worry too much. Like I totally get that, like

720
00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:28,160
Speaker 1: people's upbrings and stuff like really shape who they are

721
00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:30,000
Speaker 1: as a person when they go into adult life. But

722
00:33:30,440 --> 00:33:33,520
Speaker 1: a lot of our like the way that we are

723
00:33:33,640 --> 00:33:35,560
Speaker 1: and a lot of things we learn it does happen

724
00:33:35,640 --> 00:33:38,200
Speaker 1: in our lady years. So I have friends who have

725
00:33:38,280 --> 00:33:40,960
Speaker 1: like kind of grown up like this. Well, they probably like,

726
00:33:41,000 --> 00:33:43,640
Speaker 1: I don't even I only literally just learn what the

727
00:33:43,640 --> 00:33:45,560
Speaker 1: word mecca is personally. But I'm like, and you can

728
00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:48,720
Speaker 1: kind of tell. But some people grew up in you know,

729
00:33:49,000 --> 00:33:53,240
Speaker 1: really really affluent affluent is the world affluent house.

730
00:33:55,920 --> 00:33:57,200
Speaker 8: I did almost say it.

731
00:33:58,600 --> 00:34:00,479
Speaker 1: They kind of you know, grow up in these really

732
00:34:00,520 --> 00:34:04,120
Speaker 1: absoluent households, and they don't really you know, I can

733
00:34:04,200 --> 00:34:08,359
Speaker 1: kind of see the difference, but only slightly now because people, once,

734
00:34:08,400 --> 00:34:12,160
Speaker 1: you like, start mingling with other people from different walks

735
00:34:12,160 --> 00:34:15,759
Speaker 1: of life and different experiences and different everything too. That's

736
00:34:15,800 --> 00:34:18,880
Speaker 1: when you start kind of like your own like identity

737
00:34:18,920 --> 00:34:20,319
Speaker 1: and where you are in the world and where you're

738
00:34:20,320 --> 00:34:22,160
Speaker 1: placed in the world kind of like is shaped. So

739
00:34:22,200 --> 00:34:24,040
Speaker 1: I think that even if that right now they're spoilt,

740
00:34:24,440 --> 00:34:26,120
Speaker 1: I think that when they grow up and they start

741
00:34:26,200 --> 00:34:30,120
Speaker 1: mingling with different people, different social groups, meeting people that

742
00:34:30,560 --> 00:34:32,760
Speaker 1: they really get along with but maybe grew up poor

743
00:34:32,760 --> 00:34:34,920
Speaker 1: and like just kind of being like, their eyes will

744
00:34:34,920 --> 00:34:36,960
Speaker 1: be open to like other experiences, and I feel like

745
00:34:37,440 --> 00:34:39,480
Speaker 1: you don't need worry too much about how they are

746
00:34:39,520 --> 00:34:41,799
Speaker 1: as children, because yeah, they could be manipulating her, they

747
00:34:41,800 --> 00:34:46,240
Speaker 1: could be anything, but we all kind of our formative years.

748
00:34:46,840 --> 00:34:49,120
Speaker 1: This is not backed by science. I don't know when

749
00:34:49,160 --> 00:34:52,759
Speaker 1: the formative years are, but I feel like socially and

750
00:34:53,440 --> 00:34:55,520
Speaker 1: all of these things, it's kind of like, you know, yeah,

751
00:34:55,560 --> 00:34:59,560
Speaker 1: you know, late teens, early twenties when we start really

752
00:35:00,120 --> 00:35:02,359
Speaker 1: meaning different types of people from different walks of life.

753
00:35:02,360 --> 00:35:06,480
Speaker 1: So I think that, don't swear it yet. What did

754
00:35:06,520 --> 00:35:07,520
Speaker 1: the community have to say.

755
00:35:07,560 --> 00:35:09,799
Speaker 5: I'll do a really quick whip around, because as all ways,

756
00:35:09,840 --> 00:35:11,600
Speaker 5: we asked you guys, what you think on Instagram? If

757
00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:13,000
Speaker 5: you want to join us, you can find us at

758
00:35:13,040 --> 00:35:15,520
Speaker 5: ches and the money Aus. So firstly we said do

759
00:35:15,600 --> 00:35:18,280
Speaker 5: you think this person should say something? Sixty one percent

760
00:35:18,360 --> 00:35:21,240
Speaker 5: said yes, they have good intentions, and thirty nine percent

761
00:35:21,400 --> 00:35:23,520
Speaker 5: said no, it's not their place to tell them how

762
00:35:23,560 --> 00:35:26,719
Speaker 5: to parent. Then we said, if you said yes, have

763
00:35:26,800 --> 00:35:28,920
Speaker 5: you got any advice on how to bring it up?

764
00:35:29,440 --> 00:35:32,520
Speaker 5: And so we had a few kind of very different perspectives.

765
00:35:32,600 --> 00:35:34,600
Speaker 5: Some people said you should be able to discuss these

766
00:35:34,600 --> 00:35:38,200
Speaker 5: things with close family and some people said you absolutely

767
00:35:38,239 --> 00:35:40,000
Speaker 5: should not touch that with a ten foot pole if

768
00:35:40,040 --> 00:35:42,399
Speaker 5: you want to keep a good relationship. So there's very

769
00:35:42,440 --> 00:35:44,719
Speaker 5: differing perspectives on that one, and I guess it really

770
00:35:44,719 --> 00:35:48,120
Speaker 5: comes down to what your relationship with your family is.

771
00:35:48,480 --> 00:35:51,880
Speaker 5: Have you spoken about these things before? One person said

772
00:35:52,000 --> 00:35:54,959
Speaker 5: a really good, I think example of what to say,

773
00:35:55,000 --> 00:35:58,080
Speaker 5: and she said, discuss the tantrum that the girls had

774
00:35:58,200 --> 00:36:00,600
Speaker 5: in response to the word no, rather than making it

775
00:36:00,640 --> 00:36:03,239
Speaker 5: about the money and the other stuff, talk about the

776
00:36:03,320 --> 00:36:06,600
Speaker 5: behavior and what your experience with that was, which I

777
00:36:06,640 --> 00:36:09,000
Speaker 5: think is pretty valid and kind of going back to

778
00:36:09,040 --> 00:36:11,880
Speaker 5: what we were saying before. Then we asked, if you

779
00:36:11,920 --> 00:36:13,879
Speaker 5: are a parent, what are some of the main values

780
00:36:13,960 --> 00:36:16,080
Speaker 5: or lessons that you tried to teach your kids around money.

781
00:36:16,960 --> 00:36:19,920
Speaker 5: One person said how you earn it and how important

782
00:36:20,000 --> 00:36:22,399
Speaker 5: it is to save. Another person said that you need

783
00:36:22,400 --> 00:36:25,680
Speaker 5: to work for what you want, and somebody else said

784
00:36:26,000 --> 00:36:28,399
Speaker 5: that money needs to be earned and should be spent,

785
00:36:28,520 --> 00:36:31,040
Speaker 5: but it needs to be spent based on our needs

786
00:36:31,239 --> 00:36:33,719
Speaker 5: and our values before our once, which I think is

787
00:36:33,760 --> 00:36:36,640
Speaker 5: really relevant, particularly to the idea of a twelve year

788
00:36:36,640 --> 00:36:40,120
Speaker 5: old dropping one hundred dollars in Mecca. And then lastly

789
00:36:40,160 --> 00:36:44,080
Speaker 5: we said tell us your two cents. Somebody said it

790
00:36:44,200 --> 00:36:47,200
Speaker 5: takes a village to raise a child. You can help

791
00:36:47,239 --> 00:36:50,080
Speaker 5: to teach them values too, which I thought was a

792
00:36:50,080 --> 00:36:52,799
Speaker 5: really nice take. It could be hard, maybe if your

793
00:36:52,880 --> 00:36:55,239
Speaker 5: values conflict, and I'd be interested to know what you

794
00:36:55,280 --> 00:36:58,360
Speaker 5: guys think as parents like that in regards to that.

795
00:36:58,680 --> 00:37:00,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, like I suppose her value.

796
00:37:00,560 --> 00:37:02,600
Speaker 7: Well, again, we don't know if thin the kids were

797
00:37:02,719 --> 00:37:05,360
Speaker 7: manipulative or whatever, but like I know, like my sister

798
00:37:05,440 --> 00:37:09,719
Speaker 7: and my parenting styles are very different. And look, some

799
00:37:09,760 --> 00:37:12,920
Speaker 7: of the things she does say I would agree with

800
00:37:12,960 --> 00:37:14,719
Speaker 7: and I could do better, but some things I don't

801
00:37:14,760 --> 00:37:16,880
Speaker 7: agree with and I don't think that they work.

802
00:37:16,960 --> 00:37:17,959
Speaker 3: But like, you've got.

803
00:37:17,880 --> 00:37:20,280
Speaker 7: To try and find some common grounds somewhere because everyone's

804
00:37:20,320 --> 00:37:21,960
Speaker 7: going to be different. Every kid's going to be different,

805
00:37:22,000 --> 00:37:24,840
Speaker 7: so it does take a village. And like sometimes, like

806
00:37:24,840 --> 00:37:27,640
Speaker 7: I said, you take bits of advice from those around you,

807
00:37:27,680 --> 00:37:29,040
Speaker 7: but some you don't agree with it all and you

808
00:37:29,160 --> 00:37:31,480
Speaker 7: sort of just push it aside and try and do

809
00:37:31,560 --> 00:37:32,279
Speaker 7: what's best for you.

810
00:37:33,400 --> 00:37:34,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, totally relevant.

811
00:37:34,960 --> 00:37:37,160
Speaker 5: Somebody said, my mum always said yes to me when

812
00:37:37,160 --> 00:37:38,680
Speaker 5: I was a child, and then when I got older,

813
00:37:38,719 --> 00:37:41,799
Speaker 5: I really struggled to save and to not shop. So

814
00:37:41,840 --> 00:37:43,840
Speaker 5: it's an interesting look at me needing impact for the

815
00:37:43,880 --> 00:37:46,439
Speaker 5: flow and effects that that can have. Somebody else said

816
00:37:46,440 --> 00:37:48,480
Speaker 5: that kids can be fully want want want because of

817
00:37:48,480 --> 00:37:50,719
Speaker 5: social media and marketing, which I think is something that

818
00:37:50,800 --> 00:37:52,880
Speaker 5: I've really seen, like again with the mecha thing. My

819
00:37:52,960 --> 00:37:55,759
Speaker 5: nieces are a little bit younger than this listeners that

820
00:37:56,120 --> 00:37:59,400
Speaker 5: they talk about wanting drunk elephants, skincare and stuff that

821
00:37:59,440 --> 00:38:02,880
Speaker 5: you go, I don't have that. As someone who's nearly thirty.

822
00:38:03,120 --> 00:38:05,600
Speaker 5: It's crazy to me that you think that you need that.

823
00:38:06,320 --> 00:38:07,799
Speaker 5: Do you guys see that with your kids at all?

824
00:38:07,800 --> 00:38:10,160
Speaker 5: Them kind of mirroring. They're quite young, aren't they, so

825
00:38:10,239 --> 00:38:10,719
Speaker 5: maybe not.

826
00:38:11,040 --> 00:38:12,479
Speaker 3: Much yea Marley's five.

827
00:38:12,600 --> 00:38:15,120
Speaker 6: I mean, it's crazy when she watches YouTube and she'll

828
00:38:15,160 --> 00:38:18,520
Speaker 6: be watching Gabby's Dollhouse and then after an episode there's

829
00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:21,160
Speaker 6: an advert for to buy a Gabby Dollhouse toy, and

830
00:38:21,280 --> 00:38:25,280
Speaker 6: you know it just that little ecosystem is so crazy,

831
00:38:25,480 --> 00:38:27,480
Speaker 6: so well designed to make them want more and more

832
00:38:27,520 --> 00:38:30,239
Speaker 6: and more. It is it's hard work as a parent

833
00:38:30,320 --> 00:38:31,239
Speaker 6: to always say no.

834
00:38:31,560 --> 00:38:35,760
Speaker 7: Yeah, I find like throwing them off the scent is better,

835
00:38:35,920 --> 00:38:36,640
Speaker 7: Like you'd be like.

836
00:38:36,680 --> 00:38:38,879
Speaker 3: Yeah, maybe like for your birthday next year.

837
00:38:38,960 --> 00:38:43,719
Speaker 7: Not let he gets a birthday, but you know, like

838
00:38:43,880 --> 00:38:46,040
Speaker 7: you know, if you're a really good boy, or for Christmas.

839
00:38:46,040 --> 00:38:48,080
Speaker 3: It was like, look, if you a really good boy,

840
00:38:48,160 --> 00:38:48,680
Speaker 3: you're right.

841
00:38:48,600 --> 00:38:51,760
Speaker 7: To sounding you're telling what you really want, then you know, maybe,

842
00:38:52,000 --> 00:38:54,120
Speaker 7: but you're also going to look at you know, giving

843
00:38:54,160 --> 00:38:55,319
Speaker 7: to others and shit like that.

844
00:38:56,280 --> 00:38:58,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, you try and move instead of just being like no,

845
00:38:59,200 --> 00:39:04,680
Speaker 3: you know yeah, YouTube is like bit shit. Yeah.

846
00:39:04,920 --> 00:39:07,240
Speaker 6: When that person was talking about it takes a village

847
00:39:07,239 --> 00:39:10,840
Speaker 6: to raise a child, absolutely agree. But at the same time,

848
00:39:11,200 --> 00:39:14,839
Speaker 6: I think the rules and the standards are very much

849
00:39:14,960 --> 00:39:18,480
Speaker 6: enforced by the parents, other family members and friends. They

850
00:39:18,480 --> 00:39:22,279
Speaker 6: then follow suit. So it's really bloody hard if you

851
00:39:22,440 --> 00:39:26,720
Speaker 6: disagree at its core with how the parents are raising

852
00:39:26,719 --> 00:39:30,160
Speaker 6: that child. So that's where it's it's like you hope

853
00:39:30,200 --> 00:39:31,920
Speaker 6: that you would all be on the same page. I mean,

854
00:39:31,960 --> 00:39:33,920
Speaker 6: I'm very much sometimes I have to tell other family

855
00:39:33,920 --> 00:39:37,440
Speaker 6: members don't come over with a toy each time. Like

856
00:39:37,480 --> 00:39:39,479
Speaker 6: my brothers for example, that are in a different states,

857
00:39:39,520 --> 00:39:41,440
Speaker 6: whenever they arrive, they bring a toy with them, even

858
00:39:41,440 --> 00:39:43,839
Speaker 6: if it's not a birthday or a Christmas present. I'm

859
00:39:43,880 --> 00:39:47,040
Speaker 6: trying to build resilience into my children. I'm very much like,

860
00:39:47,360 --> 00:39:49,000
Speaker 6: stop with the gifts in the presence.

861
00:39:49,040 --> 00:39:50,160
Speaker 7: You don't want to say, do you know what the

862
00:39:50,200 --> 00:39:52,760
Speaker 7: kids having this expectation is that you see that person

863
00:39:53,400 --> 00:39:56,000
Speaker 7: automatically get something, they're going to back you up because

864
00:39:56,040 --> 00:39:58,600
Speaker 7: ultimately they're your kid, right Yeah, I think like, yeah,

865
00:39:58,800 --> 00:40:01,239
Speaker 7: in that person who's like got the dilemma, it might

866
00:40:01,280 --> 00:40:02,680
Speaker 7: be worth just saying, hey, I didn't know how to

867
00:40:02,680 --> 00:40:04,600
Speaker 7: deal with this, how would you deal with it? Just

868
00:40:04,600 --> 00:40:07,760
Speaker 7: see what the reaction is instead of going your parenting

869
00:40:08,200 --> 00:40:08,680
Speaker 7: them wrong.

870
00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:15,880
Speaker 6: Yeah, if you disagree, punch them out.

871
00:40:18,680 --> 00:40:19,080
Speaker 1: Amazing.

872
00:40:19,080 --> 00:40:20,480
Speaker 5: I feel like that's a really good place to leave.

873
00:40:20,480 --> 00:40:23,319
Speaker 5: I think, yeah, ultimately, work with the parent, not against them.

874
00:40:23,719 --> 00:40:25,080
Speaker 5: It's not your kid at the end of the day.

875
00:40:25,080 --> 00:40:27,000
Speaker 5: And if they do raise someone who's not in line

876
00:40:27,000 --> 00:40:29,160
Speaker 5: with your morals, they're not your child, and so exactly

877
00:40:29,200 --> 00:40:30,279
Speaker 5: you know, your circus, not your mom.

878
00:40:30,440 --> 00:40:31,920
Speaker 3: Showing that forever and ever and ever.

879
00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:35,959
Speaker 5: Guy, thank you so much for joining us. If people

880
00:40:35,960 --> 00:40:37,319
Speaker 5: do want to hear more of you, where can they

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00:40:37,320 --> 00:40:39,200
Speaker 5: find you? Where can they listen? What can they watch?

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00:40:39,640 --> 00:40:42,520
Speaker 6: Two Doting Dads wherever you get your podcasts from. We're

883
00:40:42,560 --> 00:40:46,840
Speaker 6: also on socials, We're at two Doting Dads on Instagram, TikTok.

884
00:40:46,960 --> 00:40:48,799
Speaker 6: We also have a Facebook group and I'm just going

885
00:40:48,880 --> 00:40:53,680
Speaker 6: to confirm the Two Doting Dads on Facebook YouTube is.

886
00:40:54,400 --> 00:40:56,279
Speaker 6: You can also find us on you very good at

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00:40:56,280 --> 00:40:59,560
Speaker 6: what we do, the two doting dads, and we have

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00:40:59,560 --> 00:41:01,760
Speaker 6: a Facebook group as well, so we're bloody everywhere.

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00:41:01,800 --> 00:41:02,160
Speaker 3: We are.

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00:41:02,520 --> 00:41:05,800
Speaker 5: Cand save incredible, well, thank you so much for joinings.

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00:41:05,880 --> 00:41:07,719
Speaker 5: Was really called it at a fresh perspective. Love having

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00:41:07,719 --> 00:41:12,200
Speaker 5: an actual parent here to comment on parenting phenomenal. Thank

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00:41:12,239 --> 00:41:15,040
Speaker 5: you guys so much for tuning in. Victoria will see

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00:41:15,080 --> 00:41:17,080
Speaker 5: you bright early for Money Diary on Monday.

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Speaker 1: Have a great weekend.

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00:41:18,320 --> 00:41:18,840
Speaker 7: Bye guys.

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00:41:26,239 --> 00:41:28,800
Speaker 4: The advice shared on She's on the Money is general

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00:41:28,840 --> 00:41:32,680
Speaker 4: in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's

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00:41:32,760 --> 00:41:36,200
Speaker 4: on the Money exists purely for educational purposes and should

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00:41:36,239 --> 00:41:39,400
Speaker 4: not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision.

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00:41:39,800 --> 00:41:42,040
Speaker 3: If you do choose to buy a financial.

902
00:41:41,600 --> 00:41:45,560
Speaker 4: Product, read the PDS TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice

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00:41:45,640 --> 00:41:49,200
Speaker 4: tailored towards your needs. Victoria, Divine and She's on the

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Speaker 4: Money are authorized representatives of Money. Sheirper pty LTD ABN

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Speaker 4: three two one is six four nine two seven seven

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Speaker 4: zero eight AFSL four five to one two you eight

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Speaker 4: nine