Speaker 1: Laura and bitch come on in.
Speaker 2: Hi everyone, Hi girls, another week is here and here
Speaker 2: we are.
Speaker 3: I have a huge announcement mission, Laura, have had a baby.
Speaker 2: This is the surrogate baby that you hadn't told anyone about.
Speaker 3: Okay, I haven't had a baby, but my sister, who
Speaker 3: is my best friend and the same person as me,
Speaker 3: she's basically an extension of me. She had her first baby,
Speaker 3: and I feel like it's like me having a baby.
Speaker 4: I agree, Auntie.
Speaker 2: Brittany's been an auntie for quite a long time though,
Speaker 2: like all of her other brothers have children. But I
Speaker 2: think there is something different when your sister has a baby.
Speaker 4: I remember when my sister had a baby and I felt.
Speaker 2: Like, oh, this is my child, this is actually my
Speaker 2: biological child.
Speaker 5: You know this for me had a baby this year
Speaker 5: as well, and I had the exact same feeling.
Speaker 3: It was a very unexpected baby in terms of not
Speaker 3: the fact it was unexpected. We had nine munchs that
Speaker 3: was coming, like we all knew it was coming, but
Speaker 3: it's it slid out into the world five weeks early.
Speaker 4: He slid on out like I don't.
Speaker 3: I'm not allowed to go into details because in fact,
Speaker 3: she reminded me, it is not my child and these
Speaker 3: are not the details for me to give. But it
Speaker 3: was like a wild delivery, very unexpected.
Speaker 1: Did Cherry have to give you a talking to?
Speaker 4: No, but that brit wouldn't share it all on a
Speaker 4: national radio show.
Speaker 3: Yeah, absolutely not.
Speaker 4: But I I we know that we have a respectful relationship.
Speaker 4: Cherry and I.
Speaker 3: She knows what I do for a job is content.
Speaker 3: But I also know that she hasn't shared it on
Speaker 3: her own. She said she's had a baby, but no details,
Speaker 3: so that's not up to me to give. But I'm
Speaker 3: too excited to not tell the world that I am
Speaker 3: a new aunt, a baby girl.
Speaker 2: I can say that, well, like, it's not BRIT's responsibility
Speaker 2: to announce her sister's.
Speaker 4: Baby, but he she is.
Speaker 1: But she's so excited about it.
Speaker 2: I get it.
Speaker 1: I understand.
Speaker 5: Well.
Speaker 3: I waited for her to post a photo. I was like,
Speaker 3: when you're leaking a photo. She's like, I think I'm
Speaker 3: gonna do that celebrity thing where you just put a
Speaker 3: foot out, and I'm like, yeah, I do it.
Speaker 4: Break crumb, bread crumb.
Speaker 5: She puts one of those baby blankets up, but you know,
Speaker 5: the wooden the wooden name. That spells out the name
Speaker 5: of the Wooden Block.
Speaker 4: It's suspense. That's what she's doing.
Speaker 2: She's trying to drive a bit of suspense around the announcement.
Speaker 4: It's not that it's because they're still in the hospital.
Speaker 3: So she was excited enough to announce. She wanted to
Speaker 3: announce it, but she's also there in the hospital, still
Speaker 3: going through it.
Speaker 1: Well, we're happy for you.
Speaker 5: From beautiful news to news that I think will shatter
Speaker 5: every heart and soul in the country.
Speaker 1: Adele has announced she's leaving music.
Speaker 4: Not okay with this? What I will never be the same.
Speaker 4: I've not heard that.
Speaker 5: Well unusual midch style. It's not exactly true. It's half true.
Speaker 5: She is leaving, but I'll tell you how long and why.
Speaker 5: After this, let's start to pick up your Monday Welcome
Speaker 5: to the show.
Speaker 1: It's Monday. We have to do this. It's a tradition.
Speaker 3: She can't.
Speaker 5: I'm going to give Britain Laura a topic news topic
Speaker 5: from today and from the weekend that the world is discussing.
Speaker 5: It's then up to you if we pick it up,
Speaker 5: carry on the discussion, or we put it down we
Speaker 5: stop talking about it.
Speaker 4: Hits got it?
Speaker 5: Okay, pick up, put down Adele announcing she's leaving music.
Speaker 4: I have ten shows left after this, but after that
Speaker 4: I will not see you for an incredibly long.
Speaker 1: Time, and I will hold you dear in my heart
Speaker 1: for that whole next of my break.
Speaker 4: It has been amazing.
Speaker 1: I just need a rest and I have spent I
Speaker 1: have spent the answer for seven years building a new
Speaker 1: life for myself and I want to live it and.
Speaker 3: I want to want to live my life.
Speaker 1: I've been building that, right.
Speaker 4: What pick it up?
Speaker 1: Pick it up?
Speaker 4: No, pick it up.
Speaker 3: She's like, done this residency for so long whilst going
Speaker 3: through a divorce and a relationship breakdown.
Speaker 4: The residency in Vegas would be so exhausted. It is
Speaker 4: so grueling, wouldn't it. And then what's the point of
Speaker 4: earning all.
Speaker 3: This money and creating this life that you want and
Speaker 3: then you can't actually enjoy it or live it?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 2: I say pick it up and put it down simultaneously,
Speaker 2: And it comes from like my pure want to hear
Speaker 2: more Adele music, Like I don't want her to go
Speaker 2: and have a hiatus.
Speaker 4: And also how long is a very long time.
Speaker 3: She'll release music? I think she probably just means she's
Speaker 3: not gonna do the residency anymore.
Speaker 5: She's also said that she wants another kid. And she's
Speaker 5: also not even married to Rich Paul. She's just not
Speaker 5: even really engaged.
Speaker 2: But maybe they'll never get married. That doesn't I mean,
Speaker 2: they don't need time to necessarily do that.
Speaker 1: She has said in the past that that they want to.
Speaker 2: No, you know, she's worked so hard, she's so amazing,
Speaker 2: And if anyone deserves to break it down.
Speaker 5: All right, pick up, put down the sweet sweet smell
Speaker 5: of Crayola crayons.
Speaker 4: Pick it up. I need context.
Speaker 2: No, I know the context of this, and I'm all
Speaker 2: for it. I think crayons have a distinct smell. It
Speaker 2: smells like childhood, smells like my kids.
Speaker 4: But no, I know what you're talking about here.
Speaker 5: It's about Yeah, Crayola have trademarked their iconic smell of
Speaker 5: their crayons so they can use it in stores, the
Speaker 5: CEO has said, and potentially down the line in a perfume.
Speaker 1: So I've got a box of Crayol and crayons.
Speaker 2: No one is wearing a perfume of crayon. That is
Speaker 2: so stupid.
Speaker 1: It is so distinct. Describe it.
Speaker 4: The notes to me it smells disgusting. No, it smells.
Speaker 4: There's no part of me that wants to let me
Speaker 4: just put someone you know is a summer scent.
Speaker 1: Put it on your pulse points. Now, Brittany Hockey's wearing
Speaker 1: ruge red.
Speaker 3: I've got the orange on my neck. No, it smells
Speaker 3: like off plastic. No, it's just plato, that's what it is.
Speaker 4: It smells like plato. It doesn't even smell. Plato is
Speaker 4: like saltyer. This smells. This smells like moldy, moldy crackers.
Speaker 5: So apparently in the crayle of stores in the US,
Speaker 5: now that it's trademark, they're going to pump it into
Speaker 5: the stores.
Speaker 1: So you walk in and have that.
Speaker 4: But it's not it's not a nice scent.
Speaker 2: Like it's not a scent that you you smell and
Speaker 2: you go, God, I want more of that. It's distinct,
Speaker 2: but that doesn't mean it's nice.
Speaker 5: Imagine going out on a date with a guy or
Speaker 5: girl and then like getting to the final point, you're
Speaker 5: abou to kiss them at their doorstep, and you go, what.
Speaker 1: Is that you're wearing?
Speaker 4: Creole? That's like finding out someone's into World of Warcraft.
Speaker 3: It's the same thing orange kreolol.
Speaker 1: I wear purple cREL.
Speaker 4: Oh my god, what a match.
Speaker 1: That's made Heaven. I'm wearing Texter. All right, pick up down,
Speaker 1: Grady joining the Mile High Club? Pick it up?
Speaker 4: Have you ever done it?
Speaker 3: I haven't, but I would don't want to leave this
Speaker 3: earth without giving it a whirl.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I pick it up as well.
Speaker 2: I've never done it, but I admire those who managed
Speaker 2: to have done it, and I would like to.
Speaker 5: This is trending training because a pilot sorry came out
Speaker 5: and said that he saw Lily Allen and Liam Gallagher
Speaker 5: for an Oasis joined the Mile High Club back in
Speaker 5: two thousand and nine. He said they were under a duvet.
Speaker 5: They didn't even go to the lavatory. They did it
Speaker 5: in the business class jet.
Speaker 4: This is what I was going to say.
Speaker 3: You can't join it in economy, you physically cannot fit.
Speaker 4: It's hard to get my pants down in economy. But
Speaker 4: if you're in business or first they have like full on.
Speaker 3: En suite bathrooms with like lounges in there, and you've
Speaker 3: got you're in a bed, like what if it's quite
Speaker 3: an empty flight?
Speaker 2: Like if you get just I don't know, you're opportunistic
Speaker 2: you're on a very empty flight.
Speaker 4: Surely you could do it an economy. I always succeeds
Speaker 4: to yourself.
Speaker 1: I've tried.
Speaker 4: You're not doing it an economy.
Speaker 1: You have tried, Mitch in economy.
Speaker 5: I tried an economy and get this is when I
Speaker 5: was one hundred and sixty kilos Mitch joking. Also, I
Speaker 5: think the air pressure affected my I think I dysfunctioned
Speaker 5: on that floor.
Speaker 1: There was no blood flow to the parts. It was
Speaker 1: really quite scary, all right.
Speaker 2: Next on the show Matt Coming Up, I went away
Speaker 2: for a couple of nights.
Speaker 4: Actually, no, that's a lie.
Speaker 2: I went away for one night, one night away from
Speaker 2: my husband, and he got up to something which, look, I.
Speaker 4: Really don't think you should have done whilst I was away.
Speaker 1: You upset about it? Or are you for it?
Speaker 2: I just kind of feel as though he went behind
Speaker 2: my back.
Speaker 4: To be honest, Drama and the John say about it.
Speaker 5: Next all right after Way after Way after.
Speaker 1: Pay, on the way on the pick.
Speaker 2: Up, my husband, Matt has done something last week which
Speaker 2: I don't know how I feel about it.
Speaker 5: Can I just say, Laura, how many times you've said
Speaker 5: that on the pickup in the history of the show.
Speaker 2: I mean to be fair, I love the man, but
Speaker 2: he does a lot of questionable things, that's for sure.
Speaker 2: It's good content. So I was away last week Britain
Speaker 2: and I. We were in Melbourne for the night and
Speaker 2: Matt had the kids. He had a very busy couple
Speaker 2: of days. And in the morning on Monday, at this
Speaker 2: point in time, I have been away for no more
Speaker 2: than about thirteen hours and I get a text message
Speaker 2: from him and.
Speaker 4: It is a picture. Let me show you this. It
Speaker 4: is a picture of what do you think this is?
Speaker 3: I mean, I know what this is, so I don't
Speaker 3: want to play this game, all right, Mitch, what do
Speaker 3: you think this is?
Speaker 5: It looks like a victim of a hit and round,
Speaker 5: like a turtle that's roadkill on the side of the road.
Speaker 2: I think it kind of looks like a cross between
Speaker 2: a kangaroo that slightly deformed and it's wearing a turtle backpack.
Speaker 3: Like it's lost its tail. I will personally defend Matt here.
Speaker 3: I do think it looks like a turtle. Okay, well
Speaker 3: you're the only one. So I get this picture sent
Speaker 3: to me and I looked down. I'm like, what is this?
Speaker 2: And I kind of put it aside, and then about
Speaker 2: fifteen minutes later, I was like, hold it on a second,
Speaker 2: what was that in the background. And I look at
Speaker 2: the picture again and in the background is the base
Speaker 2: of a medical chair, like kind of looks like.
Speaker 4: A dentist chair.
Speaker 2: And I was like, I know what this is. I
Speaker 2: know where he is. That is a tattoo chair. And
Speaker 2: Matt has gone on the one night that I am away,
Speaker 2: he has gone to the tattoo parlor and he has
Speaker 2: gotten this horrific tattoo. I thought he got it on
Speaker 2: his ass for a second, because when he sent me
Speaker 2: a photo, he was in the chair still getting it done,
Speaker 2: and he was kind of like laying down on his
Speaker 2: stomach smiling back at the camera, and the tattoo artist
Speaker 2: was down near his butt. But it turns out, look
Speaker 2: at it. It turns out he got it on his ankle.
Speaker 2: And it's so big, it's about twenty centimeters by fifteen
Speaker 2: centimeters and it takes up the whole back of his
Speaker 2: ankle and a bit of his calf, this stupid running turtle.
Speaker 5: So what you're saying, you think he did it because
Speaker 5: you're away from home.
Speaker 1: He waited for you to leave.
Speaker 2: So the story is he lost a bet, right, so
Speaker 2: he bet his brother in law that he was going
Speaker 2: to win a run or a marathon or something. Anyway,
Speaker 2: he lost it and the bet was whoever was the
Speaker 2: loser had to get this tattoo. But I think he
Speaker 2: got it done while I was away because he knew
Speaker 2: I was going to try and talk some sense into
Speaker 2: him and tell him that this was a really stupid idea.
Speaker 3: Do you dislike it? And if he approached you and
Speaker 3: asked you about it, what would you have said?
Speaker 2: I don't hate it, It's fine. He has lots of tattoo,
Speaker 2: so it's kind of hidden amongst some of the other
Speaker 2: ones he has. But I would have advised him that
Speaker 2: maybe this wasn't the best looking turtle that he could
Speaker 2: have gone for. And even when I said to him,
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, I don't know if this is
Speaker 2: a great idea, he was like a bit late, babe,
Speaker 2: what would you I don't.
Speaker 5: Know, actual turtle, realistic tattoo? Yeah, with a pencil you
Speaker 5: wanted to jump in there with real life eyes.
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 4: But here's my question.
Speaker 2: Do you think if your partner gets a tattoo that
Speaker 2: they should discuss what that tattoo is with you first.
Speaker 5: Oh, well, both our partners. Your boyfriend Ben fiance, Ben
Speaker 5: is full of tats. My boyfriend Stephen has a few
Speaker 5: and plans to get many more.
Speaker 1: This is interesting.
Speaker 5: I think we should have a say in the tattoos,
Speaker 5: or at least our opinion should be taken in and
Speaker 5: listen to.
Speaker 3: I agree, at the end of the day, it's their body.
Speaker 3: They can do what they want. Of course we don't
Speaker 3: need but it's true we don't need to preach out
Speaker 3: to anyone. But I do think it needs to be
Speaker 3: taken into consideration your partner that needs to look at
Speaker 3: you day in and day out for the rest of
Speaker 3: your existence, that they also like it.
Speaker 4: And are on board with it.
Speaker 3: Ben wants a new tattoo at the moment, I say
Speaker 3: at the Moment's gone on for about eight months because
Speaker 3: he keeps sending me pictures.
Speaker 4: And I keep semi politely veto in the.
Speaker 5: Tattoos a very detailed He's got Who's the Actor on
Speaker 5: his car?
Speaker 3: He has no he has a giant portrait of Russell
Speaker 3: Crowe on his thighs. So you picture this when we're
Speaker 3: getting sexy time, I'm looking at Russell Crowe's.
Speaker 1: Face just Russell babies. I wit Russell on?
Speaker 3: Would he Russell Crowe is his favorite person in the world.
Speaker 3: So it's not okay, hang one's gonna kill me.
Speaker 4: It's not just hang on, It's.
Speaker 3: Not just a portrait of Russell Crowe. Let me explain
Speaker 3: this because everyone thinks Ben is weird.
Speaker 6: It is.
Speaker 3: Gladiator is Ben's favorite movie. So he got a whole
Speaker 3: Gladiator scene. And Ben is six foot six, so his
Speaker 3: legs are really big. His whole scene of Gladiator with
Speaker 3: Russell Crowe, the detail right on his thigh, so that
Speaker 3: I look at Russell in my momenta, in my most
Speaker 3: intimate moment.
Speaker 2: I'm not against Matt getting tattoos. I just wish he'd
Speaker 2: consider me. And when I say that, I just I
Speaker 2: just want to give my artistic you know, my artistic
Speaker 2: input into the whole situation.
Speaker 1: You just upset that you're not on the body anywhere
Speaker 1: that nowhere.
Speaker 2: He now has my daughter's birthday to both both have two.
Speaker 4: He has both kids.
Speaker 2: Birthday's tattoo on his body and I'm not there, but
Speaker 2: he's got like a mutant turtle.
Speaker 5: All right, Well, listen, I have a feeling the phones
Speaker 5: are doing quite well. Why don't we got a break
Speaker 5: when we come back. Have you done this? Has your
Speaker 5: partner done something behind your back? We'll take your caurse
Speaker 5: next on the pickup.
Speaker 2: All right, we've just been talking about the things that
Speaker 2: your partners might do while you are away. And I
Speaker 2: say this because I want to wait in Melbourne for
Speaker 2: one night only. And I came home to my lovely husband,
Speaker 2: Maddy Jay, who had gotten the world's stupidest tattoo on
Speaker 2: the back of his leg.
Speaker 4: And he's worse. Why, well, there's way worse tattoos than us.
Speaker 4: He could have cheated on me. Yeah, he could cheat.
Speaker 5: You're at one hundred real quick. He could have gone
Speaker 5: missing and I could not know where he is.
Speaker 2: Well, if he's going to do things behind my back,
Speaker 2: I think cheating is worse than getting a tattoo.
Speaker 1: It's a horrific tato, that's the problem.
Speaker 4: It's not bad.
Speaker 1: It's a turtle on his back.
Speaker 5: Man.
Speaker 3: So Laura just called it horrific. Then when we do it,
Speaker 3: she's like, no, you're not allowed to call horrific, but
Speaker 3: it is.
Speaker 4: Do you know why?
Speaker 2: Because he listens to this show and as as things
Speaker 2: come out of my mouth, that are quite mean. I
Speaker 2: then worry that he's going to listen to it and
Speaker 2: feel sad. I love you still, even if your tattoo's awful.
Speaker 1: Is called does this having you cards?
Speaker 5: Well?
Speaker 6: Actually, to my parents, my mom did something to my
Speaker 6: dad behind his back. He bought baby cows while she
Speaker 6: was on a girl weeken away with her sisters, which
Speaker 6: is a little bit Well, they're on two and a
Speaker 6: half acres, so not really. My dad just he he's
Speaker 6: immigrants from Lebanon, so he just still thinks he's living
Speaker 6: that village lifestyle. He's had chickens like everything. My mom's
Speaker 6: not about it. So he bought these baby cows and
Speaker 6: he was so excited, and then he went away for
Speaker 6: two months and she sold with them behind his back
Speaker 6: and they were like.
Speaker 4: He fired and joy, how many cows do you think?
Speaker 6: He had three? And she was like, I'm not dealing
Speaker 6: with cows. Well he's away, No, he's got enough to
Speaker 6: deal with.
Speaker 4: I get it.
Speaker 2: If my husband bought cows and then pissed off for
Speaker 2: two months and I had to take care of the cows,
Speaker 2: I'd sell them to really, yeah.
Speaker 7: Well we're all for it.
Speaker 4: You can't do that.
Speaker 1: So if Matt.
Speaker 5: If Mat got an animal while you're away, it'll piss
Speaker 5: you off.
Speaker 2: No, no, because I get animals without Matt saying yester
Speaker 2: all the time.
Speaker 4: He didn't want a cat, and I bought a cat.
Speaker 1: So yeah, listen, that's what we wanted to bring up.
Speaker 1: Were getting que a few messages to the pick up Instagram.
Speaker 5: Yeah, Laura, just listening to you on the pickup now,
Speaker 5: hypocrite much? While you while Matt was away in America,
Speaker 5: you purchased a cat.
Speaker 4: I've got a cat, and.
Speaker 1: I quote, I don't care what he thinks, is what
Speaker 1: you said.
Speaker 4: He didn't say I don't care. That's what a quote means.
Speaker 1: A lot of talking. Man, No you did.
Speaker 4: It's a cat.
Speaker 2: It's a beautiful because she's beautiful, and I take care
Speaker 2: of her and he doesn't do anything.
Speaker 3: No, Actually, that's it. That's not accurate because you also
Speaker 3: go away a lot. And guess who looks after the cat.
Speaker 4: My mother in law, No Matt, she does, Matt's mother
Speaker 4: and my child.
Speaker 5: You are you come on this show, you blow your
Speaker 5: friend elf. Damn Matt tato his own body. But when
Speaker 5: he's away, you fill the house.
Speaker 4: With you can laser off at tattoo. You can't laser
Speaker 4: off a cat once again. At least I didn't cheat
Speaker 4: on him.
Speaker 6: True.
Speaker 5: People are very into this, Tarlie, is the same thing
Speaker 5: happened to you. We're getting lots of calls on the pickup.
Speaker 7: Yeah, my now husband. At the time, he was my boyfriend.
Speaker 7: I was going away on a three week holiday overseas.
Speaker 7: I thought I'd be the caring girlfriend. He's not a
Speaker 7: great cook, and I cooked him three weeks worth of
Speaker 7: meals and stopped him in the freezer.
Speaker 2: And it wasn't.
Speaker 7: Until our wedding two years later, in his speech that
Speaker 7: he told me that they all went to the dog.
Speaker 4: Are you a terrible cook?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 7: I don't think so, prefer takeaway while I was away,
Speaker 7: I think.
Speaker 4: Well, I hope he's learned his lesson and you've learned
Speaker 4: your lesson. Now you were never to cook for that
Speaker 4: man again.
Speaker 1: Lucky dog sick from that totally. Oh, here comes to
Speaker 1: the animal police again. So I always thinking of animals.
Speaker 1: Can I get a cat? Poor dog? Those cows we're
Speaker 1: talking about ten minutes ago, can buy them? I don't
Speaker 1: get that call back she sold the cows? Can I
Speaker 1: buy them?
Speaker 4: Let's going away next week, Load up the cows. Way
Speaker 4: for that to go away. I am going to buy
Speaker 4: some cows.
Speaker 1: All right, let's get out of here.