Speaker 1: I Heart Podcasts. You can hear more gold one I
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Speaker 2: Got anything good?
Speaker 3: Hey, this is.
Speaker 1: The Christian O'Connell show podcast more didn't you calebre moning? Christian?
Speaker 1: My name's Caleb. I mean listen to you guys for
Speaker 1: five years now. My partner and I are seven weeks
Speaker 1: seven months pregnant. And when you say your partner in you,
Speaker 1: let's be honest, she's pregnant. There is no wei. She's
Speaker 1: doing a bit of the heavy lin. Not unless we
Speaker 1: need to contact all news agencies around the world in
Speaker 1: some new miracle way. But your partner is pregnant. You
Speaker 1: are We are, as guys a bystander. You are not pregnant.
Speaker 1: She is pregnant. And I wanted to message you and
Speaker 1: thank you for the show you do every day. Okay,
Speaker 1: thank you very much, and also to ask your advice
Speaker 1: about being a good dad. I think you've been listening
Speaker 1: for five years you'll have picked it up on not
Speaker 1: so much which the good that the stories. I don't
Speaker 1: have any about having a good dad. It's the shabby dad.
Speaker 1: And then you can whatever the opposite is of what
Speaker 1: I did. There's your advice.
Speaker 3: You've got cautionary tales.
Speaker 1: Cautionary tales, I am but a causery tale. I can
Speaker 1: summon up in three and and Patsy can do hers
Speaker 1: as well. As a great month for me, and I
Speaker 1: used to read a lot of the books as well.
Speaker 1: I think the most important things I can sum up
Speaker 1: in three very easy points. One that the thing that
Speaker 1: normally talks about about being a parent is your whole
Speaker 1: job is to enjoy being a parent. A lot of it.
Speaker 1: They turn it into an ordeal and you've got to
Speaker 1: worry about this, and it becomes so stressful. If you
Speaker 1: can keep reminding yourself, even at the tough times when
Speaker 1: you're exhaust and overwhelmed by all, your job is to
Speaker 1: enjoy it. It is the greatest privilege in life is
Speaker 1: to be someone's parents. So the job is to enjoy
Speaker 1: them always, always always, always, always always always keep them
Speaker 1: talking the moment those channels of communication start to get
Speaker 1: shut down, don't hang on to being who's right and
Speaker 1: who's wrong. That is a life of misery. The most
Speaker 1: important thing is to keep them always talking, especially during
Speaker 1: the teenagers as well. Tough tougher than ever to be
Speaker 1: a teenager right now in these crazy times. Keep them talking.
Speaker 1: And the other thing is, never Caleb, never ever stopped
Speaker 1: working on your own bs. They see it all. You're
Speaker 1: always teaching your kids a lesson, and they're not always
Speaker 1: good lessons. How you are with your anger, your joy,
Speaker 1: your dreams of frustration. They are watching all of it.
Speaker 1: So always be working on your own inner stuff. Otherwise
Speaker 1: you pass it on to them. Work on your own stuff,
Speaker 1: or you're just going to pass it on to them.
Speaker 1: The best use of stuff you can do is to
Speaker 1: keep working on your own inner stuff, because I'm telling
Speaker 1: you now, they are mirror. They see all of it.
Speaker 1: My daughters now have tracked me quicker than my own wife.
Speaker 1: They know when I'm lying quicker than I do. I
Speaker 1: remember when the ratings went down to third last year
Speaker 1: and I was trying to tell them. They were like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, are you gonna get sacked?
Speaker 3: Are we going to be homeless? Are you going to
Speaker 3: a bit of pain against you? Universal's like a press conference.
Speaker 3: I was getting any stressed. I was going, it doesn't matter,
Speaker 3: and they were going, we don't believe you. There's no
Speaker 3: way you don't think it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter.
Speaker 3: And then my way of fact, Chris, can we have
Speaker 3: a word. You're trying to tell them that you're okay
Speaker 3: with this? Yeah, okay, to go back out, Patsy, Well,
Speaker 3: but how would you summon up?
Speaker 2: I've just got to say, you just talking like that
Speaker 2: is so inspiration for me as a mom, with you know,
Speaker 2: keeping the communication lines open. That's so true that my.
Speaker 1: Mums have to work so much harder now can be.
Speaker 1: I'm not trying to be fake, honest. My wife works
Speaker 1: far harder as a parent than I do, and I
Speaker 1: think even Chris, your husband would agree with that as well. Mums, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: mums are the sense of the whole thing.
Speaker 2: I think initially definitely, But what I would say to
Speaker 2: our listener is particularly within you.
Speaker 1: Please call them Caleb Rother.
Speaker 2: Thank you, Sorry I forgot Caleb's name. Congratulations.
Speaker 1: You don't know who I am right now. She's a mom.
Speaker 2: Love to think about instinct. Follow your instinct. You have
Speaker 2: this newborn. There's no guide book. You don't know what
Speaker 2: the hell you're doing. Your boobs are leaking. Everything's happening.
Speaker 2: You're not sleeping.
Speaker 1: Caleb's boobs are leaking. Go see a doctor. Go to
Speaker 1: go to chemists warehouse. They've got patches.
Speaker 2: Follow your instinct and you do know what to do.
Speaker 2: I can remember with Audrey, she was crying. I had
Speaker 2: she was a colligy baby, she was six weeks prem
Speaker 2: It was all happening. It was five years in the making,
Speaker 2: you know, infertility, and I finally had this baby, and
Speaker 2: I felt like I'd had this massive, big run up
Speaker 2: to being a mum and suddenly I remember one day
Speaker 2: I really didn't feel like I knew what I was doing,
Speaker 2: and my mother came up to help, just to release
Speaker 2: so I could go and have a shower, and she said,
Speaker 2: just keep calm. You do know what you're doing. Follow
Speaker 2: your instinct. But Mom, I don't have an instinct, and
Speaker 2: she said, you do, it's inside of you. And you
Speaker 2: know what, don't listen to what anyone else for your mum,
Speaker 2: hand generation to you, angel, angel, and don't listen to
Speaker 2: what what might work for someone else doesn't necessarily work
Speaker 2: for you. And the other thing, the third and last
Speaker 2: thing I would say. A maternal nurse said to me,
Speaker 2: I'd picked Audrey up and she said, I'll be careful
Speaker 2: with that. Don't nurse her too much. So you know,
Speaker 2: it's all, don't do this, don't do this, you should
Speaker 2: be doing that. I wish I hadn't have listened to that,
Speaker 2: because now, even though she's nearly fifteen, I would give
Speaker 2: my left leg to be able to just pick her
Speaker 2: up in my arms and give her a cuddle and
Speaker 2: sniff right into a little head. And you know, you're
Speaker 2: just so conscious of everyone says don't pick them up.
Speaker 2: Then you'll have to nurse them all the time. To
Speaker 2: hell with that. Do whatever you want, do what's right
Speaker 2: for you, and you'll be a perfect parent. Enjoy it.
Speaker 2: It goes so fast, beautiful stuff.
Speaker 3: Christian O'Connell Shark go On podcast