Speaker 1: Life Uncut podcasts acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout
Speaker 1: Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We
Speaker 1: pay our respect to their elders past and present and
Speaker 1: extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Island
Speaker 1: of peoples today.
Speaker 2: This episode is recorded on Gadigal Land of the Aurora Nation.
Speaker 2: Hi guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life.
Speaker 2: I'm cut, I'm Laura, I'm Brittany.
Speaker 3: I'm because, Oh my.
Speaker 1: Gosh, this show this week was so jam packed with
Speaker 1: like everything you can imagine. I feel like we covered
Speaker 1: some real ground.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I have like emotional whiplash.
Speaker 1: It was right everywhere.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: We had our highs, we had our loads. We spoke
Speaker 1: to so many different people. Probably one of the most
Speaker 1: interesting for me actually this week was actually I have too.
Speaker 1: But one of them is a Perth woman that we
Speaker 1: spoke to who couldn't find love in Australia, so she
Speaker 1: went and fell in love with prisoner from America. I
Speaker 1: know that we should say we shouldn't yuck anyone's yarm,
Speaker 1: but I'm not yucking it. But I'm not tested.
Speaker 2: I just think it's a very challenging setup. It's hard
Speaker 2: to choose someone. Long distance is hard enough, and in
Speaker 2: prison challenging.
Speaker 1: I just find it extreme. I find these chats and
Speaker 1: I would have loved to have spoken to them longer.
Speaker 1: But I find them so interesting, like how did you
Speaker 1: get there? How did it start then? How did it evolve?
Speaker 1: And how is it going to physically work? What's going
Speaker 1: to happen at the end, Like there are so it's
Speaker 1: like an onion.
Speaker 2: So I love that You're all you're saying is like
Speaker 2: all the unanswered questions.
Speaker 1: We have, no, but we we did no. But that's
Speaker 1: what I mean, This is what I'm interesting. We asked
Speaker 1: her a lot of it, but I still could have
Speaker 1: kept talking to her.
Speaker 5: I think there's got to be an aspect of her
Speaker 5: that is with him for the excitement of it, or
Speaker 5: it's not even him, It is the it's the chase
Speaker 5: and the thrill and the story behind it all I
Speaker 5: have to be.
Speaker 2: I mean, people are definitely attracted to like obviously toxic relationships.
Speaker 2: We talked about it so many times, and I'm not
Speaker 2: saying that this relationship is toxic, but it's definitely unconventional
Speaker 2: and it can't act like a normal relationship because you
Speaker 2: physically can't be together.
Speaker 1: Oh, I think there's a lot to be honest, I
Speaker 1: think there's a lot of it that's altruistic. And when
Speaker 1: I say that, it's because a lot of people that
Speaker 1: end up in these relationships with prisoners is because they
Speaker 1: start because they genuinely want to help them. They want
Speaker 1: to help them reform, they want to help them in there,
Speaker 1: they want to help them have a better life, and
Speaker 1: I mean that their care. Yes, yeah, so I feel
Speaker 1: like a lot of people in their relationships only want
Speaker 1: to even if they're not in prison, they want to
Speaker 1: date people that they have to help. So I think
Speaker 1: there's definitely a level of that.
Speaker 5: It's an interesting chat for well.
Speaker 2: Something else was quite interesting is the fact that Mitch
Speaker 2: and I are getting married.
Speaker 3: We've full happened.
Speaker 2: Yes, it's been really fast, shotgun wedding. Brit Is m
Speaker 2: seeing it and look, I think it's a beautiful ceremony.
Speaker 5: I agree, And the sex is great with us because
Speaker 5: it's because we just don't have.
Speaker 3: It exactly the kind of sex.
Speaker 1: I want to tell people a bit about why are
Speaker 1: you getting married?
Speaker 3: And yeah, we want to be together. Love knows no bounds.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'll tell you because they're not playing along. But
Speaker 1: I got asked to MC my brother's wedding, and Mitch
Speaker 1: and Law weren't sure that I would have the talent
Speaker 1: or skill required to do a successful m scene, so
Speaker 1: they've asked me to do a fake MC wedding speech
Speaker 1: for their fake wedding.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean, I AMC weddings on the side, like
Speaker 5: it's what I do for work sometimes, and I am
Speaker 5: all my friends and family's wedding. So we thought I'll
Speaker 5: actually watch your performance and I'll tell you if I
Speaker 5: think you've got the chops to MC a wedding.
Speaker 3: Well, really, I just thought it was because we loved
Speaker 3: each other.
Speaker 1: Anyway, don't fight like this in front of my friend
Speaker 1: Darling also on the show.
Speaker 5: You know what we discuss this is important that it
Speaker 5: actually is very important. You've probably heard about this. It's
Speaker 5: been all over the press, but the Presbyterian Church wanting
Speaker 5: to ban students that identify as queer or straight, kids
Speaker 5: that are sexually active from rising to positions of leadership
Speaker 5: within Catholic.
Speaker 1: Schools in terms of school captains and things like that.
Speaker 5: Yes, and I'm gay and I was school captain in
Speaker 5: both primary school and high school. And yes, I do
Speaker 5: want a preface by saying I had the privilege of
Speaker 5: not being out when I was school captain, because being
Speaker 5: an out queer kid is much harder than being a
Speaker 5: quick kid that knows it but isn't out and still
Speaker 5: gets to hide behind that fact that Noah, I'm straight.
Speaker 5: We have a conversation about it, because it is discrimination,
Speaker 5: That's what it is.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and Mitch Share is exactly like how you feel
Speaker 2: about that, being someone who's been in that position.
Speaker 5: Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 3: Well, let's get into the show, ladies.
Speaker 5: I was out on the weekend with a couple of pals,
Speaker 5: a couple of guy friends. You have friends other than us,
Speaker 5: shock horror. Yes, no, two girlfriends. Just they're all boys.
Speaker 5: You're the only girls I know, which does tie into
Speaker 5: this yet, Because I'm a gay man, I was with
Speaker 5: all my gay buddies on the weekend. We're having drinks.
Speaker 5: It was lovely in dinner, and I got approached by
Speaker 5: two guys that apparently I went to school with. I
Speaker 5: didn't know them. I was obviously in an older year,
Speaker 5: they were in a younger year. They came up to me,
Speaker 5: they listened to the show, they listened to other things
Speaker 5: that I do. They've seen me around and they both
Speaker 5: thanked me for being openly gay. And I was out
Speaker 5: to dinner with my boyfriend and I saw a couple
Speaker 5: of them at Martin Gorough as well, and they didn't
Speaker 5: come up to me, and it was it was a
Speaker 5: moment that I hadn't really had before where I was
Speaker 5: thanked for being openly gay, and it really touched me.
Speaker 5: I've never had that thing.
Speaker 1: You've helped them. They're obviously gay, You've helped them feel
Speaker 1: comfortable in who they are exactly.
Speaker 5: Yeah. I mean where I'm from, it's a predominantly heterosexual
Speaker 5: Caucasian community, and I think seeing me in school and
Speaker 5: seeing me flourish outside of school especially touched them because
Speaker 5: they're obviously gay themselves.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Well, because you correct me if I'm wrong. Mitch, you
Speaker 1: weren't gay at school. I mean, you were gay, but
Speaker 1: you didn't come out at school.
Speaker 5: No, I didn't come out until twenty eighteen. I've only
Speaker 5: recently come out in the last five years or so.
Speaker 5: But then it got us talking about everything that's happening
Speaker 5: down in Victoria now with the Presbyterian Church that have
Speaker 5: come out and said, if you are a queer kid,
Speaker 5: if you were gay, and you are in any of
Speaker 5: these religious schools in Victoria, essentially you can't rise to
Speaker 5: a position of power, which was me. I was a
Speaker 5: school captain in both primary school and in high school,
Speaker 5: still where the badge is proudly.
Speaker 2: Did you feel when you were at school, and I
Speaker 2: mean you went to a public school, did you feel
Speaker 2: that you weren't able.
Speaker 1: To come out?
Speaker 2: Did you feel that there was a lot of shame
Speaker 2: around it? I mean, and this is how many years
Speaker 2: ago were you at school?
Speaker 5: I left in twenty thirteen.
Speaker 2: Okay, did you hold that in because you were worried
Speaker 2: about the judgment at the time or were you just
Speaker 2: not at a point where you'd grappled with your own sexuality?
Speaker 5: It was one hundred percent because of everyone else. If
Speaker 5: it was a perfect world, I would have come out
Speaker 5: the moment I realized when I was eight and when
Speaker 5: I was nine.
Speaker 2: How does it make you feel then seeing this, I
Speaker 2: mean knowing that one you were school captain in your
Speaker 2: school and seeing what's going on in Victoria that if
Speaker 2: you go to a Presbyterian school there that if you
Speaker 2: are a queer kid or if you're someone who is
Speaker 2: not even queer, if you're sexually active, that you're no
Speaker 2: longer potentially allowed to have a role of leadership within
Speaker 2: the school because it doesn't uphold the Christian values in
Speaker 2: the school.
Speaker 5: Ridiculous. I mean, one, I think you made this point, Laura.
Speaker 5: How are they going to police it? I mean, are
Speaker 5: they going to go on your phone and see if
Speaker 5: you've got gay tinder or like look through your outside. Yeah,
Speaker 5: you turn up to school and then have a metal
Speaker 5: detector and going anyone I've got any sex toys. It's ridiculous.
Speaker 1: It's not going to be about that, but it's going
Speaker 1: to be about suppressing and I'm going to say child,
Speaker 1: because they are a child now under eighteen. It's suppressing
Speaker 1: kids to say, well, if you want to achieve anything
Speaker 1: here of significance, don't be gay, don't come out, don't
Speaker 1: be queer. And that's going to cause a hot whole
Speaker 1: bunch of problems.
Speaker 5: I can't tell you how awful it was going through
Speaker 5: school in year twelve, trying to work out my HC,
Speaker 5: trying to keep my parents happy, keep my friends happy,
Speaker 5: without the notion of potentially being different to everyone and
Speaker 5: being gay, then I realized that on top of it,
Speaker 5: then the bullying that goes on top of it, it is.
Speaker 5: It was. It was one of the worst periods of
Speaker 5: my life. That's why I didn't come out until five
Speaker 5: years after school.
Speaker 1: Not just saying it's literally the more I'm thinking about it,
Speaker 1: the more refuriated I am imagine saying you are less
Speaker 1: than you are not worthy of what your peers are
Speaker 1: worthy of because you were choosing not even I mean,
Speaker 1: we all know sometimes it's not a choice. This is
Speaker 1: the discussion. But you're less than your peer because you're queer.
Speaker 1: Is that rhymes? That is a trademark that should not
Speaker 1: be This should not be happening to these poor kids
Speaker 1: in school. Should n'p to anyone, well, it should be
Speaker 1: at a disadvantage because they identify as quickly.
Speaker 5: All it is is enforcing that this is wrong. Fundamentally,
Speaker 5: that's something that you can't change. That you were born
Speaker 5: with is wrong, and you cannot be equal to someone
Speaker 5: in your exact same year because of this difference that
Speaker 5: you cannot that you wake up every day and you
Speaker 5: were stuck with the torture that it would do to
Speaker 5: young queer kids. It upsets me but a young kid
Speaker 5: in high school, it would do irreversible damage for their
Speaker 5: whole life.
Speaker 2: Well, I think it also reinforces I mean, we know
Speaker 2: that queer kids experience bullying at school. It also reinforces
Speaker 2: that it's okay to other someone. And it's coming from
Speaker 2: the top down, the people who are in power, who
Speaker 2: are supposed to protect, who are supposed to encourage, who
Speaker 2: were supposed to help you be the best, the brightest,
Speaker 2: most engaged person. It's there saying be you, but be different,
Speaker 2: and then reinforces to everybody else that it's okay for
Speaker 2: them to other you.
Speaker 1: At the same time, did you much experience, I mean,
Speaker 1: you knew you were gay from nine years old.
Speaker 5: I was a kid.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but you obviously felt that you couldn't come out.
Speaker 1: Did you experience bullying at school because were you perceived
Speaker 1: as gay? Was assumed you are gay?
Speaker 5: What was your experience Like, Yes, I mean, you know,
Speaker 5: the six inches of quaft here at the top and
Speaker 5: being the leader of the drama department didn't help.
Speaker 1: But I don't give away yea, it was a giveaway.
Speaker 5: Yeah, but it was assumed that I was gay. I
Speaker 5: had got all the slurs under the sun and I'm
Speaker 5: lucky that I had a great family, and I was
Speaker 5: lucky that I was headstrong enough. But you get one
Speaker 5: kid who has it's awful. You get one kid who's
Speaker 5: got a tough upbringing and he's also grappling with their sexuality,
Speaker 5: and that is enough to really ruin someone's life.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I mean this coming from a public school,
Speaker 2: where I'm guessing was more accepting than say a Presbyterian school,
Speaker 2: where they are making it very clear how not acceptable
Speaker 2: it is, and that's being reinforced. One of the things
Speaker 2: I thought was really interesting. So the Scotch College chairman,
Speaker 2: Alex Sloan came out and said, we will continue to
Speaker 2: reflect values of respect, tolerance and inclusion. It's okay to
Speaker 2: say one thing, but you're doing the complete opposite. There
Speaker 2: is nothing about tolerance or inclusion that's happening here. When
Speaker 2: you say that children who are queer cannot take leadership,
Speaker 2: calling bullshit on Sloan.
Speaker 1: Sorry.
Speaker 5: Yeah. Also, if you your beliefs stopping others from doing
Speaker 5: something that is inherently part of them, they're not beliefs.
Speaker 5: It's discrimination.
Speaker 1: It's also just saying I am so furious. It's also
Speaker 1: just saying that queer people essentially do not have the
Speaker 1: skills to be successful or leaders in any aspect of life.
Speaker 3: It's saying how shameful it is. It's bringing it back
Speaker 3: to shame.
Speaker 2: And I think that we've worked so hard to try
Speaker 2: and get to a place where people do not feel
Speaker 2: shameful about their sexuality.
Speaker 3: And it's one step forward seventeen steps back.
Speaker 5: And if you want to push gay people out, enjoy
Speaker 5: having no entertainment. I mean every show you watch is
Speaker 5: produced created. I'm gay. I'm talking on the radio. Turn
Speaker 5: the radio off if you don't want to hear me. Yeah,
Speaker 5: I mean, I mean, nothing will be fun anymore if
Speaker 5: you get rid of the gay people.
Speaker 2: It's true, the gay you're the only fun ones that
Speaker 2: there are.
Speaker 5: That's exactly right. But on a serious note, thoughts are
Speaker 5: out there, kids who are going through this because it
Speaker 5: is rough. And my dms are always open.
Speaker 1: Absolutely, and I second that Mitch's dms are always open,
Speaker 1: but ours are too. I was a joke, but ours,
Speaker 1: we're always it now. It's no secret that I was
Speaker 1: single for a very long time, a solid decade. I
Speaker 1: was on the app swiping left, right and center, and.
Speaker 5: I got callouses on your fingers.
Speaker 1: I had IRSI and my thumb. Yeah, it caused me
Speaker 1: a lot of problems. I saw wrists things like that.
Speaker 1: Well that was from the swiping before you guys, get
Speaker 1: ahead of yourself. But I came across a lot of
Speaker 1: people in that time, a lot of dates, even came
Speaker 1: across Chanting Tatum. I came across some themes people on Raia. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because I was on all the apps. I was on
Speaker 1: so many apps, I had no storage on my phone.
Speaker 1: But one person I did not come across is a
Speaker 1: man by the name of Stephan Pierre Tomlin. He's thirty
Speaker 1: two and I don't know how I didn't come across
Speaker 1: him because he is officially Tinder's most swiped man. He
Speaker 1: is the most swiped person in the world on Tinder.
Speaker 1: That was in twenty seventeen, fourteen thousand, six hundred right swipes.
Speaker 1: I want to know how the hell someone does that,
Speaker 1: So I decided to call him. He's in London. It's
Speaker 1: four I am Hypierre.
Speaker 5: How are you fun?
Speaker 6: Yeah? Really well, thanks thanks for having me.
Speaker 1: Guys.
Speaker 2: I need to know how on earth is it even
Speaker 2: remotely possible to have fourteen thousand matches? Like, how much
Speaker 2: time do you spend on Tinder in order to rack
Speaker 2: up that many swipes?
Speaker 6: Do you know what? Yeah, obviously it became in a
Speaker 6: bit of a game for me at the time, quite
Speaker 6: a little. Yeah, it was quite addictive. But no, I
Speaker 6: spent probably about two hours a day wow on Tinder
Speaker 6: back in twenty seventeen.
Speaker 5: Wow, Stephan Pierre. I need to know. People in the
Speaker 5: car would be thinking, what the hell does this guy
Speaker 5: look like? Because to get that many right swipes right
Speaker 5: through to one on the apps, right is yes, left
Speaker 5: is no. So I mean, how tall are you? Do
Speaker 5: you want to? I mean you're handsome, You've got beautiful,
Speaker 5: beautiful eyes, white teeth.
Speaker 6: Thank you so much. You're so kind. But I mean
Speaker 6: it is four thirty in the morning, so I'm probably
Speaker 6: not looking the best right now.
Speaker 5: A man, you're pretty good.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I'm currently well. I'm six foot two and a half.
Speaker 6: I've been a fashion model for six sorry, thirteen years. Signed.
Speaker 6: I've worked with some big brands like D squared, Dormoni,
Speaker 6: Birbery And.
Speaker 1: Is that what your profiles like?
Speaker 6: It's all dark and handsome.
Speaker 1: But let us take all the boxes. Let us know
Speaker 1: what your profile is like. Because you've I mean, fourteen thousand,
Speaker 1: six hundred people swipe right, So give us some tips.
Speaker 1: What are your pictures like and what you buy?
Speaker 6: Yeah, so the first picture was a professional one, yeah,
Speaker 6: and it was a portrait photo of myself. The bio
Speaker 6: is quite snappy. I think I had a little joke
Speaker 6: in there. I'm not actually on Tinder at the moment.
Speaker 6: And the pictures have to be really you have to
Speaker 6: be careful not to have your friends in the pictures
Speaker 6: because then it becomes a game of like where's Wally. Yeah,
Speaker 6: and if you've got it depends on your your hobbies
Speaker 6: as well. So mine's flying, so I had quite a
Speaker 6: few pictures of me flying as well, and then you
Speaker 6: sort of attract people into aviation. But I mean, if
Speaker 6: you're like into horse riding, then it's always recommended to
Speaker 6: put a picture of your hobby in as well. Always helps.
Speaker 2: So in order to go through this many swipes and matches,
Speaker 2: did you have your like parameters set to everything? Were
Speaker 2: you like you can be up to one hundred and
Speaker 2: live in Spain? What was your parameters for dating?
Speaker 6: Yeah? They were quite wide actually, I think at that
Speaker 6: time I was probably eighteen, not to forty five.
Speaker 3: Forty five.
Speaker 5: That's a wide mit. So how many of these are
Speaker 5: you turning around into actual dates?
Speaker 6: Do you know what? I was quite fussy actually because
Speaker 6: initially when Tinder told me that I was the most
Speaker 6: white man, it was on statistics, so it's how many
Speaker 6: people write swipe you? And yeah, being a fashion model
Speaker 6: traveling up and down the country and being on national
Speaker 6: TV as well, I've done like eight or nine dating shows,
Speaker 6: so my face was quite familiar.
Speaker 1: So you're still single.
Speaker 6: I'm actually I'm actually seeing someone at the moment. Yeah,
Speaker 6: I am seeing so at the moment. Yeah, just seeing
Speaker 6: how things go at the moment. To be fair, I'm
Speaker 6: actually helping unfortunate men at the moment using AI. Yeah,
Speaker 6: I'm sort of love coaching at the moment.
Speaker 5: When you say unfortunate men, explain what you're doing. So
Speaker 5: you're profiting off being the most wipe men on Tinder.
Speaker 5: How are you using AI to help other guys?
Speaker 6: Yeah, so you've actually made an app, which which Yeah,
Speaker 6: So I'm using AI, Chat, GPT and some special AI prompts.
Speaker 6: We basically ask them for photos and we put them
Speaker 6: through we put them through the software and it makes
Speaker 6: about forty to forty five AI generated pictures. Some people
Speaker 6: say catfishing, but I don't think it is. It's just yeah,
Speaker 6: it's just being ahead of the game.
Speaker 1: Really, but it's changing their picture.
Speaker 6: I know. But if you compare it in comparison to
Speaker 6: like in the past and I was swiping, there's a
Speaker 6: lot of girls that use filters.
Speaker 5: Right, Oh, I get his No, I get his point. Yeah, girls, yeah.
Speaker 4: Guys.
Speaker 6: Attracting a certain type of guy, right that that that's
Speaker 6: exactly the same thing.
Speaker 1: Don't you feel like you Yeah, you turned up and
Speaker 1: you were like, hey, you tricked me with your filters.
Speaker 1: Don't you think you're tricking people now band filters?
Speaker 6: Well yeah, yeah, I kind of felt like that at
Speaker 6: some stage. But at the end of the day, you
Speaker 6: still bag the date.
Speaker 2: Right, Why do you think people need this service? Like
Speaker 2: when you say unfortunate men? What makes a man unfortunate?
Speaker 6: Yeah? When I say unfortunate, I mean it's someone that
Speaker 6: wouldn't necessarily match others as it's quite a hard one. Actually,
Speaker 6: it's just someone that needs help with their online dating.
Speaker 6: For example, it could be someone that's you know, not
Speaker 6: very good at the chat who needs a bit of
Speaker 6: coaching with their bio. We actually go through My team
Speaker 6: goes through their social media and tells them to sort of,
Speaker 6: you know, take down pictures, change this and that. So
Speaker 6: it's like fine tweaking and we've we've we've got a
Speaker 6: high so sas rate. We've changed quite a lot of
Speaker 6: man from.
Speaker 5: Zero to hero Stefan. If you had to write like
Speaker 5: a caption for me on Tinder, what would you write?
Speaker 5: Knowing me in this short period of time looking at me?
Speaker 5: How would you describe? What would my tinderbaiyo be? If
Speaker 5: I hired your expertise?
Speaker 6: I would I would put I'm a funny man, I'm
Speaker 6: handsome and I work in radio.
Speaker 1: Short how much funny are you making?
Speaker 5: How much would I pay for that?
Speaker 6: So? Yeah, we charged forty five pounds a month and
Speaker 6: this includes half an hour coaching with myself and my team,
Speaker 6: and obviously you get your AI generated pictures and you
Speaker 6: get all your edited profile prompts as well.
Speaker 2: It just makes dating like so lazy. You don't have
Speaker 2: to do anything anymore. Literally, we can call you up
Speaker 2: and then you can do it for us. Do people
Speaker 2: can they come to you and say, oh, I'm not
Speaker 2: sure how to respond to this message, or I don't
Speaker 2: know what the right like, is that the sort of
Speaker 2: detailed level that you can give to somebody who's wanting,
Speaker 2: you know, a bit of dating.
Speaker 6: I mean, everyone's right, we've got confidence coaches, we've got Yeah,
Speaker 6: I got myself. I'm basically the modern day hitch.
Speaker 1: So yeah.
Speaker 6: Out.
Speaker 1: I got asked something incredible yesterday, guys, And No, it
Speaker 1: was not to marry Ben. That was not the question.
Speaker 2: I feel like we would have known about that by now.
Speaker 2: Had that been the question, everyone on social media would
Speaker 2: have known to.
Speaker 1: No, I'd probably turn a radio content. You don't really
Speaker 1: use your life. No. I got asked by my brother
Speaker 1: and his fiance to EMC they're wedding. That was a
Speaker 1: simultaneous side So I don't know how I would feel
Speaker 1: if that was me. So I want to be happy
Speaker 1: and I wanted to do it a part of me
Speaker 1: because he might be listening. No, but I just feel
Speaker 1: like there's immense amount of pressure, like to get asked
Speaker 1: to em a wedding because I know the reason they said,
Speaker 1: Like they want we want you to be the MC
Speaker 1: because you're funny. You have this radio job, you speak
Speaker 1: for a living, and you have the podcast. But actually
Speaker 1: you know Mitch. We've spoken about this before because Mitch
Speaker 1: you're a very funny person. Laura, you are too, but
Speaker 1: Mitch is a very naturally always funny person. And you
Speaker 1: and I have spoken about this just off air in
Speaker 1: terms of when because I have this bad habit of
Speaker 1: introducing you to people. It's like, oh, it's the funniest guy.
Speaker 1: You're me.
Speaker 5: You say it a lot all the time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so you have said like, it's always hard than
Speaker 1: because you feel like you've got to be on your
Speaker 1: a game all the time. That's how I feel. I
Speaker 1: think people think I'm going to come in and do
Speaker 1: this amazing job. How do I MC wedding? You EMC everything?
Speaker 5: Yeah, I AMC a lot of all my I'm the
Speaker 5: go to for all my friends because obviously I'm at
Speaker 5: radio prison. I've been doing it for years and everyone
Speaker 5: asked me to the point where you end up not
Speaker 5: enjoying weddings of people close to you. I AMC my
Speaker 5: sister's wedding, and I didn't really get to enjoy the
Speaker 5: day because I was so focused on doing such a
Speaker 5: good job. And I feel you do the same.
Speaker 2: I think everyone thinks because it is a very prestigious
Speaker 2: thing to be asked to be a bridesmaid, a maid
Speaker 2: of honor, an MC like, they are very prestigious roles
Speaker 2: to play in a wedding, but not everybody wants to
Speaker 2: be asked because it is I mean, it just means,
Speaker 2: like you said, you don't get to sit there and
Speaker 2: have a few wines and relax and laugh.
Speaker 1: You got to bring me entertainment.
Speaker 5: Oh my god, a good MC makes or breaks a wedding.
Speaker 5: If they're bad, the wedding sucks.
Speaker 1: I forgot there just two minutes ago. Off he asked
Speaker 1: me to MC your fortieth Sorry three years, I actually
Speaker 1: forgot you to me. So what are you? I have
Speaker 1: until October, so it's they've asked me. Now I have
Speaker 1: a lot of time to play my jokes. What do
Speaker 1: I do?
Speaker 5: Okay, well, this is good because I get paid to
Speaker 5: MC weddings. I've got tips for you. Tip number one,
Speaker 5: it's not your day. It's not about you, for God's sake,
Speaker 5: the wedding is about horror, and some mcs make it
Speaker 5: all about themselves. It's a stand up routine.
Speaker 1: You can't just tell jokes about yourself.
Speaker 2: You also have to find that very nice balance between
Speaker 2: roasting your brother roasting the groom and the bride, but
Speaker 2: also doing it with like tender love. So it has
Speaker 2: to be equal portions of roast, then love roast, then.
Speaker 1: Love like a roast, beef love semwich.
Speaker 2: Yeah, with lots of love foot in there, because I
Speaker 2: think some mcs think it's all about comedy, comedy, comedy hour,
Speaker 2: and then you walk away from it and.
Speaker 1: You're like, do they even like each other? I don't
Speaker 1: have a problem roasting my brother. So moving on, what's
Speaker 1: the next one?
Speaker 5: What about that? I can sprinkle the love on top,
Speaker 5: say say you love your brother.
Speaker 1: Dane, I love you. Believable.
Speaker 3: She's also paid actress.
Speaker 1: But you're a dickad all right.
Speaker 5: Next point, you need to make sure you have a
Speaker 5: personal connection with the bride and groom. There is also
Speaker 5: nothing worse than going to a wedding where they've clearly
Speaker 5: paid for someone that they've never met and they had
Speaker 5: one brunch with before the wedding and well, this is
Speaker 5: our perfect MC and they get the name wrong and
Speaker 5: it's a mess and it's awful.
Speaker 1: This is my brother. I've got a personal connection. Can
Speaker 1: you give me some points?
Speaker 3: They came out of the same womb.
Speaker 1: Okay, connected see what's some points I can use.
Speaker 5: I think you need to come fully prepared wing it,
Speaker 5: because Brittany wings everything. You need to write. You need
Speaker 5: to write points. You need to know the ins and
Speaker 5: the outs. You need to know where the bathrooms are.
Speaker 5: You're like a flight attendant. You know where the emergency
Speaker 5: exit ros are. You need to know everything.
Speaker 2: Also, Brittany, Okay, how do we feel about this? Britt
Speaker 2: loves a revealing dress. I wish I could share with
Speaker 2: you the dress that she was going to wear to
Speaker 2: my wife.
Speaker 1: The word going to I don't wear it, that you
Speaker 1: saw it and you thought maybe this one won't be appropriate?
Speaker 2: How like, how revealing can the MC be? Do you
Speaker 2: have to be a bit demure or can you just
Speaker 2: get the girls party three piece suit?
Speaker 5: No, no, the girls can be. You want to be
Speaker 5: looked at. You've got to command attention. So I think
Speaker 5: get the puppies out. Okay, yea yeah, you want to
Speaker 5: give the old people some reason to, you know, enjoy
Speaker 5: the wedding, my breast, they're all family to Actually, no,
Speaker 5: I think the best way to vet your gig of
Speaker 5: MC and your brother's wedding is to write a practice introduction.
Speaker 5: Let's say, for example, you know what, let's throw a
Speaker 5: little pickup wedding. Let's do it. We invite you here
Speaker 5: today to celebrate the wedding of Laura Burne.
Speaker 1: Johnson, who's already married Laura Johnson.
Speaker 3: Yes, I mean polygamy is fine.
Speaker 5: And Mitch churry myself.
Speaker 2: Oh, Mitch, I've always wished that we were in a
Speaker 2: relationship and that you were heterosexual and asked me to
Speaker 2: marry you.
Speaker 1: It's never weird, Matt, block your ears.
Speaker 5: We'll never get together. We'll sleep in separate bedrooms.
Speaker 1: That's but we'll have the best friendship, so much fun,
Speaker 1: share of wardrobe, we get.
Speaker 5: To watch movies all the time. It's not about us,
Speaker 5: not about it about you. Tomorrow on the show, you
Speaker 5: need to go to bed, and you need to prepare
Speaker 5: an introductory statement as if you were seeing our wedding
Speaker 5: and then perform it to us on the next show.
Speaker 1: So pretty homework. You just said, I love to be
Speaker 1: on the fly, I hate home.
Speaker 2: Well, we're just making sure that you can actually prepare
Speaker 2: for something, because we know you don't prepare for this show.
Speaker 5: And a good MC prepares the show writing.
Speaker 1: An introductory wedding speech for my co host Miss Churry
Speaker 1: and Laura burn Johnson.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but we love each.
Speaker 5: Other yep, ye who never touched each other.
Speaker 1: No sleep in separate pairs. So yeah, stand in marriage.
Speaker 5: Yes.
Speaker 2: Maybe once your brother hears this, he'll decide whether or
Speaker 2: not he actually wants you to be there.
Speaker 3: MC you're not, he might say, sorry, you put it radio,
Speaker 3: but not strong.
Speaker 5: Let's role play. So the wedding is about to start.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I love you so much. I hope
Speaker 2: Britney says wonderful things about that.
Speaker 5: Should we consummate?
Speaker 1: Excuse everyone, we have some quiet. It is time to
Speaker 1: start the wedding seat. Most of us have gathered here
Speaker 1: today for the same reason, and that is the buffet.
Speaker 1: But for those psychopaths that don't love it all you
Speaker 1: can eat and are here to actually celebrate the wedding
Speaker 1: of Mitch and Laura. I will I welcome you. I'm
Speaker 1: sure you are all as confused as I am by
Speaker 1: this union. But hey, if there's one thing I've learned
Speaker 1: from these two wonderfully chaotic humans here, it's well, actually,
Speaker 1: come to think of it, I haven't learned a lot,
Speaker 1: but let's just roll with it.
Speaker 5: It's kind of like a gross yeah, I'm.
Speaker 3: Not feeling the love yet.
Speaker 1: These two have so many similarities that make this union
Speaker 1: today absolutely perfect. We both like men. One of those
Speaker 1: shared similarities is their stubbornness and determination that they really
Speaker 1: do go above and beyond to ensure success in all
Speaker 1: aspects of their life. Nothing stands in their way, no
Speaker 1: matter how big, small, or gay. Literally, not even the
Speaker 1: fact that Mitch is gay and Laura is married with
Speaker 1: kids will stop them.
Speaker 7: No.
Speaker 1: Laura's and Mitch love is built on a foundation of trust, respect,
Speaker 1: reality TV, and mutual piss taking. They had a deep
Speaker 1: understanding of each other's needs and desires, and they work
Speaker 1: together to make each other's dreams a reality. Their love
Speaker 1: is a shining example of what true love can be
Speaker 1: in a fantasy world. Okay, and the only greater thing
Speaker 1: than their commitment to each other is their commitment to
Speaker 1: content creation. It truly is an inspiration to everyone, and
Speaker 1: I am so honored to stand here today and wish
Speaker 1: you both a lifetime of happiness and no sex. To
Speaker 1: be the MC at our imaginary wedding, I.
Speaker 5: Will just say, as someone who EMC's wedding for a living,
Speaker 5: I get paid to do it. You had a lightness,
Speaker 5: you had, love, you had humor Towards the end that
Speaker 5: was actually really.
Speaker 3: For a moment there, I was like, wouldn't this be
Speaker 3: a beautiful wedding speech?
Speaker 1: We should do a bitch?
Speaker 5: Yeah, I thought we were getting married for a point.
Speaker 1: Well, if I'm being honest, the last sentimental part was
Speaker 1: a I, but the rest of it was me what
Speaker 1: you got challenge to write the sentimental part because I
Speaker 1: just don't love you guys enough, but I could do
Speaker 1: the piss take good?
Speaker 5: All right? Well, what I've gone on Dunny's I don't know.
Speaker 5: Britt doesn't know this, but we've got Dane, Britt's brother
Speaker 5: on the line. Hi Dane, thanks for joining us on
Speaker 5: the pickup mate? How are you?
Speaker 7: Oh?
Speaker 1: Hi Dane, Dane.
Speaker 3: I feel like you've actually made a pretty good choice here.
Speaker 2: I firstly was going to say, I don't know if
Speaker 2: Brits MC will be up to the up to the match,
Speaker 2: but I'll tell you that was pretty good.
Speaker 5: Dane.
Speaker 1: Did you just hear that? I didn't know? You're on
Speaker 1: the line?
Speaker 6: Okay?
Speaker 1: Sorry? Do you have a higher expectation of me?
Speaker 3: Do you still want brit to be the MC?
Speaker 8: Yeah? Well I could have gone the way really, but
Speaker 8: public speakers, I am, and I can't really empty my
Speaker 8: own weddings. She might as well have a crack at it.
Speaker 1: Well, no, you can't empty your own wedding.
Speaker 5: Wait.
Speaker 2: Wait, what I'm getting from this is that if you
Speaker 2: could have, you would have preferred to have done the
Speaker 2: job yourself, but you gave it to your sister.
Speaker 1: Okay, Sorry, I thought I was calling you to say
Speaker 1: I'll do it, but you are you calling to let
Speaker 1: me know if I'm allowed you.
Speaker 8: Can do it. Takes the pressure off me, and I'm
Speaker 8: giving you enough carry over the years that it's probably
Speaker 8: tom you gave me come back in return.
Speaker 1: But oh, absolutely right, Dane.
Speaker 2: Can you tell us why did you choose Apart from
Speaker 2: the fact that we all know Britt can speak underwater
Speaker 2: because it's literally her job, why did you choose Britt
Speaker 2: to be your MC?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 8: Well, yeah, Mitch, he'd be all right, but he'd probably
Speaker 8: just get into too much politics and all the other
Speaker 8: jazz that he wants to talk about.
Speaker 1: He's very political.
Speaker 8: My brother, the old man had just talked about freaking Patterson.
Speaker 1: That's true. He recite a poem.
Speaker 5: So we need to get to the point. So Brittany,
Speaker 5: you need to decide now whether or not you want
Speaker 5: to accept Dane's offer, which kind of was taken back,
Speaker 5: but also now it's back on the table.
Speaker 3: I feel the best of a bad situation.
Speaker 1: Really, Dane, you have put me through thirty six years
Speaker 1: of absolute hell. We we thought, we kicked, we screamed,
Speaker 1: But I would be honored to be amc.
Speaker 5: Happy ending Dane.
Speaker 2: We love that.
Speaker 1: Congratulations day.
Speaker 3: It'll the big wedding.
Speaker 8: Thank you. You're invited if you want to come, So
Speaker 8: I love it.
Speaker 5: I love a free buffet, Dan, can I come to
Speaker 5: the buck?
Speaker 1: So?
Speaker 5: I love a titty bubbie.
Speaker 8: Seventy fishings.
Speaker 5: I'm there on every weekend anyway, so it's brilliant. I
Speaker 5: was there there, girls and everyone listening. We all have
Speaker 5: a single friend right now, because we're all in relationships,
Speaker 5: committed relationships, and we all have a single friend out
Speaker 5: there that can tell us how bad it is and
Speaker 5: how grim it is out there in the dating scene.
Speaker 1: I mean, I was saying I was the single friend
Speaker 1: for ten years, and I can tell you is horrific.
Speaker 1: Trying to find the relationship was tough.
Speaker 2: Work online dating, you know, trying to do the rounds
Speaker 2: of the bars.
Speaker 5: Wiping through the apps. It can be really hard. But
Speaker 5: the thing we're not doing, we're not looking in the
Speaker 5: right place, is we're not looking in federal prisons.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, this is what I did, right.
Speaker 5: What do you mean you need to find yourself a
Speaker 5: prison pen power? This is true, and I was a woman.
Speaker 5: Savannah Phifer has fallen in love with her American prisoner
Speaker 5: pen Power. So she's a fly and flyout worker over
Speaker 5: in Perth. She's really busy, can't really lock someone down
Speaker 5: and find love. So what she's done is she's just
Speaker 5: gone and floun out to Nevada in the United States
Speaker 5: to meet with a man that she's had correspondence with
Speaker 5: via the pen power system.
Speaker 2: Did you mean that, Panta when you said she couldn't
Speaker 2: lock someone down, so she found someone who's literally locked down?
Speaker 5: No, I didn't know. That's good though, I should have.
Speaker 5: Let's cross over to Nevada now because we actually have
Speaker 5: Savannah joining us. Hi, Savanna, you're not in the prison
Speaker 5: right now while you're at homes Hi.
Speaker 4: Savannah, I'm not at the prison.
Speaker 1: Hi, Hi, Savannah. I love that Mitch just said. You've
Speaker 1: flown over there to speak to someone you've had correspondence with.
Speaker 1: But it's your boyfriend, isn't it Alex, who is in
Speaker 1: prison in Nevada is your boyfriend?
Speaker 8: Yes?
Speaker 1: And so how did you get, like I have a
Speaker 1: billion questions, let's start from the start, how did you
Speaker 1: get to the point where you were at penpal with
Speaker 1: someone in prison?
Speaker 4: Going back probly about two and a half years ago,
Speaker 4: I saw a TikTok of a girl who was doing
Speaker 4: something actually for like a university course. It was more
Speaker 4: so research, if you could say.
Speaker 6: Where.
Speaker 4: She was writing a penpal and he was really good
Speaker 4: at art, so she turned his aunt into stickers, sold
Speaker 4: it on Etsy, was making him money like a release fund,
Speaker 4: basically help him when he gets out. So I kind
Speaker 4: of wanted to do the same thing. I wrote to
Speaker 4: somebody through Write a Prisoner, which is a website, not Alex,
Speaker 4: somebody else, and they wrote me one letter. I wrote
Speaker 4: them back and I never actually heard from them again.
Speaker 5: From a prisoner.
Speaker 1: Pretty much.
Speaker 4: But turned out to the best thing really because he
Speaker 4: is actually friends with Alex and said, well, he started
Speaker 4: speaking to somebody else and he found a connection, so
Speaker 4: he passed my details on to Alex. And at first
Speaker 4: I was really mad.
Speaker 2: I was like what so wait, wait, wait, wait, So
Speaker 2: you mailed to the friend first, and this is in intentional?
Speaker 2: Were you looking for a romantic relationship or a romantic
Speaker 2: connection to start with?
Speaker 1: She wanted to help out like thattok.
Speaker 2: And so when Alex sent you a letter to start with,
Speaker 2: like does he send a photo? How does this all unfold?
Speaker 2: Because I feel like it is. I mean, it must
Speaker 2: be very unconventional meeting someone, becoming pen pals with, but
Speaker 2: then forming a romantic connection with someone who is literally
Speaker 2: in prison.
Speaker 4: Yeah, so I obviously received his letter. He didn't attach
Speaker 4: a picture to it, but it has got what's called
Speaker 4: their badge number, so I can look up their badge
Speaker 4: number within the Nevada justice system and it shows you
Speaker 4: their like mug shop. It shows you all the crimes
Speaker 4: that they've ever done. It gives you their height, their weight,
Speaker 4: their hair color. So I knew everything about him.
Speaker 1: So it's it's literally like going to get a sperm
Speaker 1: doner where you find out the history. So Savannah, what
Speaker 1: did Alex do? Why is Alex in prison?
Speaker 4: So he got done for robbery assault on battery was
Speaker 4: a deadly weapon causing severe bodily heart.
Speaker 1: Okay, And so was there any part of you, Yeah,
Speaker 1: that that is a bit like Ooh, I don't know
Speaker 1: if I want to date someone like that, or well,
Speaker 1: how did you think I'm gonna love it? What does
Speaker 1: that make you scared?
Speaker 3: As well?
Speaker 4: Not really, because all parties involved weren't innocent, Like, it
Speaker 4: wasn't against women and children. It wasn't some little innocent
Speaker 4: person in a shop or in a corner store that
Speaker 4: was like held up with a gun. It wasn't anything
Speaker 4: like that, per se. So everyone involved there were no
Speaker 4: innocent parties involved in Obviously, the circumstances surrounding the situation
Speaker 4: had a lot to do with his upbringing and the
Speaker 4: situations he sort of was put in Savannah.
Speaker 5: How have your family taken this? So have you told
Speaker 5: them that you're in a relationship with someone in prison?
Speaker 7: Yeah, at first my mom was a little bit skeptic, like, obviously,
Speaker 7: you know, he's in Prisiondent, so that's not really Christmas.
Speaker 4: Pretty much, pretty much or not for a couple of
Speaker 4: years anyway. But so at first she was about fitstand norfish.
Speaker 4: But she can see how happy he sort of makes
Speaker 4: me even from a distance. So they have conversations he
Speaker 4: sends her birthday cards and Christmas cards, and she sang
Speaker 4: him Happy Birthday last year when it was his birthday
Speaker 4: of the phone. So yeah, they get along now, but
Speaker 4: at first, obviously there was some skepticism.
Speaker 3: So this has been going on for a while. Then,
Speaker 3: how long have you been dating for?
Speaker 4: He sent me my first letter in May?
Speaker 1: Okay, right, so yeah, yeah, okay. Will you just met
Speaker 1: him for the first time?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Do you meet him? Do you get like you have
Speaker 1: to meet in the visitor room in front of everyone
Speaker 1: in the guards? Do you get a.
Speaker 5: Loans it conjugal? Do you get is there a piece
Speaker 5: of plexiglass between the two?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 1: What was it? First contact line? Tell us everything?
Speaker 4: So, because his prison is actually what they consider a camp,
Speaker 4: so it's minimum. So he managed to work his level
Speaker 4: from a maximum to a minimum to the point now
Speaker 4: where he's like the lowest pretty much of custody. So
Speaker 4: they're a lot more lenient with certain things. So I
Speaker 4: was the only person in visitation on the Saturday and
Speaker 4: the Sunday. I got an additional day because I came
Speaker 4: from so far. You meet the correctional officers, they walk
Speaker 4: you into the room. Alex was already waiting there with
Speaker 4: like all the snacks and games and everything set up,
Speaker 4: and then.
Speaker 1: They just walk out game snack.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, he really sucks that connect four. I'm totally winner.
Speaker 1: Oh how long was he in for?
Speaker 6: Like?
Speaker 2: How long are you going to have to do this
Speaker 2: long distance before you're able to actually be in a
Speaker 2: relationship on the outside world.
Speaker 4: He expires in January twenty twenty six, so he can
Speaker 4: actually parole in July twenty twenty five. But due to
Speaker 4: good behavior, he's been able to get a lot of
Speaker 4: time reduced off of a sentence. So for every month
Speaker 4: that he's in camp, his senses actually gets reduced by
Speaker 4: ten days every month.
Speaker 1: That he's ind do you get to like on your
Speaker 1: meetings because obviously you're very limited time together. I'm in
Speaker 1: a long distance relationship my partner Ben's not in prison.
Speaker 1: But do you get to kiss be physical? Not I'm
Speaker 1: not necessarily asking about sex, but like, are there like
Speaker 1: no contact rules because some of the movies you see,
Speaker 1: you know when people come in and they're like no touching.
Speaker 4: In certain prisons. Yes, Like it obviously depends on their maximum, minimum, medium,
Speaker 4: all the different levels. So like if he was in
Speaker 4: the prison where he was before we wouldn't we have
Speaker 4: to be sitting soper far no touching, But now there's
Speaker 4: no glass. It's literally just him and I in the
Speaker 4: whole room. So yeah, hold hands the whole.
Speaker 1: Time, kiss and stuff. Yeah whatever, I'm.
Speaker 5: Conj'm I'm not being critical. I genuinely want to know.
Speaker 5: Was the dating pool just so bad in Perth that
Speaker 5: you had to resort to a prison pen pal? I mean,
Speaker 5: I'm just trying to work out how it went from
Speaker 5: tinder and the apps in Hearth to a prison pen power.
Speaker 5: Isn't that bad over there?
Speaker 4: I wouldn't just saraily say it's that bad because I
Speaker 4: can't really put my experiences on everybody else, but the
Speaker 4: lack of effort and the lack of emotional connection things like,
Speaker 4: for example, I work first, I work in the Poolra Desert.
Speaker 4: Alex got a bunny rabbit made like a Teddy beit
Speaker 4: in my favorite color, and he shipped it to my
Speaker 4: job in the Poolbra Desert, so when I got there,
Speaker 4: I had something to remind me of him and the present.
Speaker 4: Just for me to be there from prison in a
Speaker 4: different country, whereas men in Perth can't even take.
Speaker 7: That morning.
Speaker 1: That's very sweet. That's very sweet. But also he's got
Speaker 1: to put in a bit more effort because he is
Speaker 1: in lockdown.
Speaker 3: This is true, and he has plenty of time on
Speaker 3: his hands.
Speaker 2: Okay, my worry is, and do you not have the
Speaker 2: same one that he may commit a crime again, that
Speaker 2: if this is something that he's done in his past,
Speaker 2: and that it's something I mean, is this the first
Speaker 2: big crime that he committed that landed him in jail.
Speaker 1: Or are you like, no, know that he's not going
Speaker 1: to reoffend.
Speaker 4: I mean, it would be be naive of me to
Speaker 4: sit here and say that he's going to come out
Speaker 4: and be an angel, it's going to all be perfect,
Speaker 4: because at the end of the day, mistakes happen every day.
Speaker 4: People end up in jail for you know, crashing their
Speaker 4: car or doing something wrong. So it'd be a naive
Speaker 4: of me to sit here and be like, yeah, he's perfect,
Speaker 4: He's going to come out and be a model citizen.
Speaker 4: Do I hope for that, of course, because I'd love
Speaker 4: to him for him to come out and have a
Speaker 4: normal life. But in saying that, you never really know.
Speaker 1: Well, last question and we'll let you go. I'm going
Speaker 1: to make an assumption that he's probably not allowed to
Speaker 1: leave America. I could be wrong, but do you have
Speaker 1: plans to move there to be together, because I'm assuming
Speaker 1: when you've got a criminal record like that, you can't
Speaker 1: relocate to another country, especially Australia.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Unfortunately, so he can visit Australia, but he can't move there,
Speaker 4: So I will have to relocate. So I'm planning on
Speaker 4: hopefully relocating probably six months prior to him getting out,
Speaker 4: just so that I can ensure he has the best
Speaker 4: sort of foot forward and start in life if I
Speaker 4: have a house somewhere for him to go, so he's
Speaker 4: not coming out to nothing once he doesn't have to resort.
Speaker 1: To your good humans, good human I hope he's work. Yeah,
Speaker 1: thank you, Thank you. Enjoy the rest of your visits.
Speaker 5: Pleasure chatting to you. Wow, that's an interesting story, isn't it?
Speaker 1: But I just can't get my head around it's it's
Speaker 1: do you know what? It is more common? I have
Speaker 1: read about this quite a bit. There are a lot
Speaker 1: of people, but I mean, Savannahs was accidental. She was
Speaker 1: trying to do a good thing and she sort of
Speaker 1: fell in love. But a lot of people actually go
Speaker 1: intentionally to fall in love with the prisoner, which is
Speaker 1: a whole other stanger. Maybe that's not the excitement and
Speaker 1: the dangerous side of it as well, maybe dangerous sexy.
Speaker 1: I don't know, not for me. Look, I saw an
Speaker 1: article pop up, guys that was it is. I'm sure
Speaker 1: you're going to say it's old and the stories come out,
Speaker 1: and it was many moons ago. It's about Lady Gaga,
Speaker 1: but I've only just seen it and I weirdly connected
Speaker 1: with it. I told I produced Tony. We were having
Speaker 1: just like a real discussion actually as friends one day.
Speaker 1: Believe it or not, not work related that I agree
Speaker 1: with Lady Gaga. Now this is a story about her
Speaker 1: deciding to be intentionally celibate.
Speaker 2: I mean, you're also celibate, but it's because your boyfriend's
Speaker 2: on the other side of the world.
Speaker 1: Definitely not by choice intentional celibacy. Yeah, I don't know
Speaker 1: if that's intentional or unintentional, because I'm still choosing that relationship. Well,
Speaker 1: but I'm not choosing cely.
Speaker 2: Believe me, I feel like if you were to be
Speaker 2: not celibate, that would be cheating.
Speaker 1: Yeah, celibacy is currently a byproduct of choice of relations Okay, right,
Speaker 1: So Lady Gaga has said she wanted to become celibate
Speaker 1: because she believed that when she had sex, creativity and
Speaker 1: like productivity left her body. So every time she had
Speaker 1: sex she thought was being sucked out. It was being
Speaker 1: sucked out of her like of all tex Right now,
Speaker 1: this is funny on the surface because you laugh at
Speaker 1: it because you're like, as if your creativity leaves orifices
Speaker 1: of your body when you have.
Speaker 5: What are mental images in this one?
Speaker 1: But but then I got thinking, and this part of
Speaker 1: it that I sort of agree with. I think when
Speaker 1: you are like single or celibate, for me personally, I
Speaker 1: am so much more productive. Like I I'm more creative,
Speaker 1: I get more stuff done, I achieve more than I
Speaker 1: ever thought I could possibly achieve. Then when I'm in
Speaker 1: a relationship, now I'm wondering, is there something to be
Speaker 1: said with my creativity leaving different parts of my body?
Speaker 2: Are you saying that because Ben, your boyfriend is on
Speaker 2: the other side of the world and you are unintentional
Speaker 2: slash intentionally celibate, that you now feel more creative if
Speaker 2: you are, Okay, It's got nothing to do with being celibate.
Speaker 2: It's got to do with your boyfriend being on the
Speaker 2: other side of the country. You can't see him. You're
Speaker 2: not going out on dates. You're like all the things
Speaker 2: and the energy that you have to put into casual
Speaker 2: dating or like when you first start dating somewhere, it
Speaker 2: takes up so much time. I agree, Like it's the texting,
Speaker 2: the going on online dating, all that stuff takes energy,
Speaker 2: effort and brain space. And I think once you either
Speaker 2: shift into a very long term relationship or you are
Speaker 2: intentionally celibate, you just free up so much more time
Speaker 2: in your life to dedicate to work.
Speaker 1: Well, it led me on like a deep dark track
Speaker 1: of famous people that have decided to go celibate. Now,
Speaker 1: these are people you wouldn't think. Did you know that
Speaker 1: Lenny Kravitz, who is like sex God the singer, was
Speaker 1: celibate for three years.
Speaker 2: Because it had so much of it prior. He was like,
Speaker 2: all right, I'm topped up, but I don't need to
Speaker 2: have sex.
Speaker 5: It's no fun in that. If everyone wants to sleep
Speaker 5: with you, that.
Speaker 1: Would be pretty fun.
Speaker 5: There's no chase.
Speaker 3: It's the only reason why he'd want it was because
Speaker 3: of the chase.
Speaker 2: Do not think that we kind of like over emphasized
Speaker 2: this whole idea of a chase A bit.
Speaker 1: No men love a chase.
Speaker 5: I got a physical chase. God, I want to sit down,
Speaker 5: but I mean the metaphorical chases finds anyway, chase.
Speaker 1: That's about all you love. Katy Perry, Katy Perry. One
Speaker 1: year she was celibate but not even kissing.
Speaker 5: She kissed a girl, so she really went backwards.
Speaker 1: And she liked it and loved it. Adriana Lima, who
Speaker 1: is like the number one Victoria's secret model. Now this
Speaker 1: is like a kick to all the men she dated,
Speaker 1: because she dated a lot of men, but she was
Speaker 1: sex at all celibate before marriage.
Speaker 5: Brittie, what's your point? Are you trying to get Laura
Speaker 5: and I into a celibacy practicing? You want to join it?
Speaker 5: You want us to join the celibacy cult.
Speaker 1: Do you think you're more productive and more effective pre
Speaker 1: your relationship match?
Speaker 5: No, I'm definitely lazier now because I've got what I've got,
Speaker 5: got a partner, got it on tap all.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's something to be said for it. A lot
Speaker 1: really fair. I mean sometimes we go through some pretty
Speaker 1: celibate stints in a long term relationship.
Speaker 3: We've got two kids, we're.
Speaker 1: Not having sex every day. You are celibate, which is elevate.
Speaker 2: But I think when you start dating it's every day.
Speaker 2: It's like, you know, it's on high rotation. And then
Speaker 2: you you know each other so intimately you love each
Speaker 2: other and you're like, oh, we'll just do it tomorrow night.
Speaker 5: When we're not tying, I'm with you.
Speaker 1: We have passes and you know, I feel creative in
Speaker 1: other ways, but trust me, it's just sometimes it goes by.
Speaker 5: But it's also like I know exactly what you do.
Speaker 3: I know the formula.
Speaker 5: Yes, you know exactly the turns you take, you know
Speaker 5: when the light's going to go read, you know the
Speaker 5: machas you go through. It's exactly why driving a word
Speaker 5: I reckon.
Speaker 1: We could call Maddie JA. Your husband's like a serious
Speaker 1: brank and like ask and tay that you've decided you
Speaker 1: want to do it. You did all this research and
Speaker 1: you think you should try it for a year and
Speaker 1: see what he would do. Dorect we could do that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, he'd say, well, it makes no difference to me.
Speaker 1: It's like, how is that any different? Let's call Maddy
Speaker 1: J right now?
Speaker 5: Where is he right now? What would he be doing.
Speaker 5: It's the afternoon working.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, getting ready to pick the kids up
Speaker 1: from daycare.
Speaker 5: Oh no, it's called Maddie J Laura's husband.
Speaker 9: Hello, Hey, honey, Hello.
Speaker 2: So I was talking to Brute about something and I
Speaker 2: have an idea for us that I would like us
Speaker 2: to try, and you need to hear me out. Okay,
Speaker 2: So did you hear about how Lady Gaga went celibate
Speaker 2: for like three years?
Speaker 5: One?
Speaker 2: H Okay, So Lady Gaga went celibate because she felt
Speaker 2: like when she had intimacy and when she had sex
Speaker 2: that it was creatively depleting her. So like by abstaining
Speaker 2: from sex, she felt like she could be more creative
Speaker 2: and she was better at her job. Okay, Well, okay,
Speaker 2: you know how I've been talking about how I feel
Speaker 2: like I have nothing left in the tank because obviously
Speaker 2: work's been full on trying to juggle the kids. I
Speaker 2: wanted to get your opinion on trialing being intentionally celibate
Speaker 2: for like.
Speaker 9: A few months.
Speaker 3: We do have sex every single week?
Speaker 2: We have sex, Then that's so untrue. Okay, Well, in
Speaker 2: that case, if you actually think it's been six months,
Speaker 2: we literally have sex every single week, and you always
Speaker 2: think you always think every week like clockwork.
Speaker 9: That is not true at all.
Speaker 1: It is it actually.
Speaker 9: Last week, and then I can't remember the time before that.
Speaker 2: We had sex on Thursday. That's that's not even a
Speaker 2: week ago, it's four days ago.
Speaker 9: But then before that it's been like months.
Speaker 1: It was two weeks and it was because I had
Speaker 1: my period.
Speaker 9: Really okay, well, how long would you like to not
Speaker 9: have sex for?
Speaker 2: Well, if you think we've been going six months? How
Speaker 2: what okay?
Speaker 3: One year?
Speaker 9: No sex for one year, no sex for one year
Speaker 9: because you want to be more creative, well.
Speaker 1: Both of us.
Speaker 2: I think it would make us both more creative. And
Speaker 2: then also how good would it be when we start
Speaker 2: doing it again?
Speaker 3: Hello?
Speaker 9: This rule is stupid. I mean, I'm just going to
Speaker 9: masturvate a hell of a lot for sure.
Speaker 1: How could you be mad? It's gonna feel so good
Speaker 1: when you do it for the first time.
Speaker 3: Believe it or not.
Speaker 1: I do not want to go a year? And also
Speaker 1: how dare you? It is every single week except for
Speaker 1: the weeks when you know the natural body clock says no.
Speaker 5: You're on the pickup. By the way, Matten, you're on
Speaker 5: the radio.
Speaker 1: Spigure that out with my cattle. That is Actually Mitch
Speaker 1: and I just sat in on a therapy session about
Speaker 1: your sex life. Actually it was not supposed to happen.
Speaker 5: I think a week's plenty of time. I would say
Speaker 5: that's very good to do it weekly. Last Thursday, it's
Speaker 5: waiting my call. When I called you guys last Thursday.
Speaker 3: Exactly we were doing with that whole seven minutes that
Speaker 3: you were calling.
Speaker 2: My question is, how would you actually feel if we
Speaker 2: tried to do six months?
Speaker 1: Pretty sad?
Speaker 9: I just don't get it. I just don't get white
Speaker 9: people in a world where there's such a lack of enjoyment,
Speaker 9: the one thing that brings you a little bit of joy,
Speaker 9: why would you want to remove that for such a
Speaker 9: long period of time. It doesn't make any sense.
Speaker 3: I mean, people do like to torture themselves.
Speaker 1: My choice is in a cellment relationship. Yeah, but that's
Speaker 1: because you're the body part you need is far away
Speaker 1: from you. Exactly. Yeah, all right, anyway, that's enough of
Speaker 1: a fair sex dlling.
Speaker 2: I promise it'll be less than six months that you
Speaker 2: have to wait, maybe another week's where are we.
Speaker 9: Going to have to say?
Speaker 5: Okay, that's that's a private discussion, not thatil you had
Speaker 5: on the radio. Then he goes Australia's Matey Jay everyone,
Speaker 5: good luck with that conversation is
Speaker 1: M