WEBVTT - The best of THE PICKUP - 30th April 0:00:00.840 --> 0:00:05.240 Life Uncut podcasts acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout 0:00:05.280 --> 0:00:09.080 Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We 0:00:09.119 --> 0:00:11.880 pay our respect to their elders past and present and 0:00:12.000 --> 0:00:15.240 extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Island 0:00:15.280 --> 0:00:16.080 of peoples today. 0:00:16.280 --> 0:00:19.560 This episode is recorded on Gadigal Land of the Aurora Nation. 0:00:21.720 --> 0:00:23.840 Hi guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life. 0:00:23.880 --> 0:00:25.560 I'm cut, I'm Laura, I'm Brittany. 0:00:25.760 --> 0:00:28.800 I'm because, Oh my. 0:00:28.640 --> 0:00:32.680 Gosh, this show this week was so jam packed with 0:00:32.800 --> 0:00:34.840 like everything you can imagine. I feel like we covered 0:00:34.880 --> 0:00:35.720 some real ground. 0:00:35.800 --> 0:00:37.320 Yeah, I have like emotional whiplash. 0:00:37.600 --> 0:00:39.199 It was right everywhere. 0:00:39.280 --> 0:00:39.480 Yeah. 0:00:39.479 --> 0:00:41.000 We had our highs, we had our loads. We spoke 0:00:41.040 --> 0:00:42.680 to so many different people. Probably one of the most 0:00:42.760 --> 0:00:45.560 interesting for me actually this week was actually I have too. 0:00:46.120 --> 0:00:48.199 But one of them is a Perth woman that we 0:00:48.240 --> 0:00:51.120 spoke to who couldn't find love in Australia, so she 0:00:51.320 --> 0:00:55.080 went and fell in love with prisoner from America. I 0:00:55.120 --> 0:00:57.040 know that we should say we shouldn't yuck anyone's yarm, 0:00:57.040 --> 0:00:59.640 but I'm not yucking it. But I'm not tested. 0:01:00.720 --> 0:01:06.679 I just think it's a very challenging setup. It's hard 0:01:06.720 --> 0:01:11.399 to choose someone. Long distance is hard enough, and in 0:01:11.480 --> 0:01:13.039 prison challenging. 0:01:13.200 --> 0:01:15.760 I just find it extreme. I find these chats and 0:01:15.760 --> 0:01:17.600 I would have loved to have spoken to them longer. 0:01:17.680 --> 0:01:21.000 But I find them so interesting, like how did you 0:01:21.040 --> 0:01:23.520 get there? How did it start then? How did it evolve? 0:01:23.520 --> 0:01:26.200 And how is it going to physically work? What's going 0:01:26.240 --> 0:01:27.800 to happen at the end, Like there are so it's 0:01:27.800 --> 0:01:28.280 like an onion. 0:01:28.319 --> 0:01:30.399 So I love that You're all you're saying is like 0:01:30.400 --> 0:01:32.160 all the unanswered questions. 0:01:31.760 --> 0:01:35.000 We have, no, but we we did no. But that's 0:01:35.000 --> 0:01:36.520 what I mean, This is what I'm interesting. We asked 0:01:36.520 --> 0:01:37.800 her a lot of it, but I still could have 0:01:37.880 --> 0:01:38.560 kept talking to her. 0:01:38.720 --> 0:01:40.360 I think there's got to be an aspect of her 0:01:40.480 --> 0:01:43.000 that is with him for the excitement of it, or 0:01:43.120 --> 0:01:45.080 it's not even him, It is the it's the chase 0:01:45.080 --> 0:01:47.280 and the thrill and the story behind it all I 0:01:47.319 --> 0:01:47.800 have to be. 0:01:48.280 --> 0:01:51.640 I mean, people are definitely attracted to like obviously toxic relationships. 0:01:51.680 --> 0:01:53.360 We talked about it so many times, and I'm not 0:01:53.400 --> 0:01:56.320 saying that this relationship is toxic, but it's definitely unconventional 0:01:56.360 --> 0:01:59.080 and it can't act like a normal relationship because you 0:01:59.120 --> 0:02:00.400 physically can't be together. 0:02:00.560 --> 0:02:02.440 Oh, I think there's a lot to be honest, I 0:02:02.440 --> 0:02:05.280 think there's a lot of it that's altruistic. And when 0:02:05.320 --> 0:02:07.800 I say that, it's because a lot of people that 0:02:08.000 --> 0:02:10.680 end up in these relationships with prisoners is because they 0:02:10.680 --> 0:02:12.760 start because they genuinely want to help them. They want 0:02:12.760 --> 0:02:14.440 to help them reform, they want to help them in there, 0:02:14.440 --> 0:02:16.040 they want to help them have a better life, and 0:02:16.080 --> 0:02:18.960 I mean that their care. Yes, yeah, so I feel 0:02:18.960 --> 0:02:21.160 like a lot of people in their relationships only want 0:02:21.160 --> 0:02:22.440 to even if they're not in prison, they want to 0:02:22.480 --> 0:02:24.440 date people that they have to help. So I think 0:02:24.480 --> 0:02:25.840 there's definitely a level of that. 0:02:26.080 --> 0:02:27.280 It's an interesting chat for well. 0:02:27.520 --> 0:02:29.920 Something else was quite interesting is the fact that Mitch 0:02:30.040 --> 0:02:31.360 and I are getting married. 0:02:31.760 --> 0:02:32.519 We've full happened. 0:02:33.080 --> 0:02:37.480 Yes, it's been really fast, shotgun wedding. Brit Is m 0:02:37.480 --> 0:02:40.280 seeing it and look, I think it's a beautiful ceremony. 0:02:40.360 --> 0:02:42.320 I agree, And the sex is great with us because 0:02:42.400 --> 0:02:43.359 it's because we just don't have. 0:02:43.320 --> 0:02:45.160 It exactly the kind of sex. 0:02:45.200 --> 0:02:46.960 I want to tell people a bit about why are 0:02:46.960 --> 0:02:47.600 you getting married? 0:02:47.639 --> 0:02:52.519 And yeah, we want to be together. Love knows no bounds. 0:02:52.560 --> 0:02:54.600 Okay, I'll tell you because they're not playing along. But 0:02:54.960 --> 0:02:57.720 I got asked to MC my brother's wedding, and Mitch 0:02:57.760 --> 0:03:00.440 and Law weren't sure that I would have the talent 0:03:00.560 --> 0:03:03.480 or skill required to do a successful m scene, so 0:03:03.520 --> 0:03:06.720 they've asked me to do a fake MC wedding speech 0:03:06.760 --> 0:03:07.680 for their fake wedding. 0:03:07.760 --> 0:03:09.720 Yeah, I mean, I AMC weddings on the side, like 0:03:09.720 --> 0:03:11.240 it's what I do for work sometimes, and I am 0:03:11.480 --> 0:03:13.799 all my friends and family's wedding. So we thought I'll 0:03:13.840 --> 0:03:16.359 actually watch your performance and I'll tell you if I 0:03:16.400 --> 0:03:18.200 think you've got the chops to MC a wedding. 0:03:18.240 --> 0:03:20.160 Well, really, I just thought it was because we loved 0:03:20.200 --> 0:03:20.480 each other. 0:03:20.560 --> 0:03:24.839 Anyway, don't fight like this in front of my friend 0:03:25.000 --> 0:03:26.800 Darling also on the show. 0:03:26.840 --> 0:03:30.000 You know what we discuss this is important that it 0:03:30.040 --> 0:03:32.040 actually is very important. You've probably heard about this. It's 0:03:32.080 --> 0:03:35.080 been all over the press, but the Presbyterian Church wanting 0:03:35.120 --> 0:03:38.720 to ban students that identify as queer or straight, kids 0:03:38.720 --> 0:03:41.640 that are sexually active from rising to positions of leadership 0:03:41.680 --> 0:03:42.800 within Catholic. 0:03:42.480 --> 0:03:45.040 Schools in terms of school captains and things like that. 0:03:45.120 --> 0:03:46.760 Yes, and I'm gay and I was school captain in 0:03:46.800 --> 0:03:49.360 both primary school and high school. And yes, I do 0:03:49.400 --> 0:03:51.680 want a preface by saying I had the privilege of 0:03:51.760 --> 0:03:54.760 not being out when I was school captain, because being 0:03:54.800 --> 0:03:57.480 an out queer kid is much harder than being a 0:03:57.560 --> 0:03:59.320 quick kid that knows it but isn't out and still 0:03:59.320 --> 0:04:01.640 gets to hide behind that fact that Noah, I'm straight. 0:04:01.760 --> 0:04:05.000 We have a conversation about it, because it is discrimination, 0:04:05.120 --> 0:04:05.720 That's what it is. 0:04:05.800 --> 0:04:08.280 Yeah, and Mitch Share is exactly like how you feel 0:04:08.280 --> 0:04:10.400 about that, being someone who's been in that position. 0:04:10.640 --> 0:04:11.320 Yeah, exactly. 0:04:11.800 --> 0:04:13.560 Well, let's get into the show, ladies. 0:04:13.600 --> 0:04:15.400 I was out on the weekend with a couple of pals, 0:04:15.800 --> 0:04:17.919 a couple of guy friends. You have friends other than us, 0:04:18.160 --> 0:04:21.840 shock horror. Yes, no, two girlfriends. Just they're all boys. 0:04:21.920 --> 0:04:24.520 You're the only girls I know, which does tie into 0:04:24.560 --> 0:04:26.040 this yet, Because I'm a gay man, I was with 0:04:26.040 --> 0:04:27.799 all my gay buddies on the weekend. We're having drinks. 0:04:27.800 --> 0:04:30.720 It was lovely in dinner, and I got approached by 0:04:31.120 --> 0:04:34.480 two guys that apparently I went to school with. I 0:04:34.480 --> 0:04:36.880 didn't know them. I was obviously in an older year, 0:04:36.880 --> 0:04:38.839 they were in a younger year. They came up to me, 0:04:39.000 --> 0:04:40.760 they listened to the show, they listened to other things 0:04:40.760 --> 0:04:42.839 that I do. They've seen me around and they both 0:04:43.080 --> 0:04:46.599 thanked me for being openly gay. And I was out 0:04:46.640 --> 0:04:49.640 to dinner with my boyfriend and I saw a couple 0:04:49.680 --> 0:04:51.080 of them at Martin Gorough as well, and they didn't 0:04:51.080 --> 0:04:52.159 come up to me, and it was it was a 0:04:52.200 --> 0:04:54.400 moment that I hadn't really had before where I was 0:04:54.440 --> 0:04:58.560 thanked for being openly gay, and it really touched me. 0:04:58.600 --> 0:04:59.320 I've never had that thing. 0:05:01.720 --> 0:05:04.279 You've helped them. They're obviously gay, You've helped them feel 0:05:04.279 --> 0:05:05.760 comfortable in who they are exactly. 0:05:05.880 --> 0:05:09.560 Yeah. I mean where I'm from, it's a predominantly heterosexual 0:05:09.800 --> 0:05:13.039 Caucasian community, and I think seeing me in school and 0:05:13.040 --> 0:05:16.320 seeing me flourish outside of school especially touched them because 0:05:16.320 --> 0:05:17.359 they're obviously gay themselves. 0:05:17.400 --> 0:05:17.599 Yeah. 0:05:17.640 --> 0:05:19.839 Well, because you correct me if I'm wrong. Mitch, you 0:05:20.040 --> 0:05:21.719 weren't gay at school. I mean, you were gay, but 0:05:21.760 --> 0:05:22.880 you didn't come out at school. 0:05:22.880 --> 0:05:25.359 No, I didn't come out until twenty eighteen. I've only 0:05:25.440 --> 0:05:27.240 recently come out in the last five years or so. 0:05:27.279 --> 0:05:29.440 But then it got us talking about everything that's happening 0:05:29.440 --> 0:05:31.719 down in Victoria now with the Presbyterian Church that have 0:05:31.800 --> 0:05:34.360 come out and said, if you are a queer kid, 0:05:34.360 --> 0:05:35.839 if you were gay, and you are in any of 0:05:35.880 --> 0:05:39.440 these religious schools in Victoria, essentially you can't rise to 0:05:39.480 --> 0:05:41.080 a position of power, which was me. I was a 0:05:41.080 --> 0:05:43.600 school captain in both primary school and in high school, 0:05:43.640 --> 0:05:44.720 still where the badge is proudly. 0:05:47.760 --> 0:05:49.280 Did you feel when you were at school, and I 0:05:49.320 --> 0:05:51.320 mean you went to a public school, did you feel 0:05:51.320 --> 0:05:53.000 that you weren't able. 0:05:52.920 --> 0:05:53.400 To come out? 0:05:53.480 --> 0:05:54.760 Did you feel that there was a lot of shame 0:05:54.800 --> 0:05:56.680 around it? I mean, and this is how many years 0:05:56.680 --> 0:05:57.680 ago were you at school? 0:05:57.680 --> 0:05:58.799 I left in twenty thirteen. 0:05:58.960 --> 0:06:02.040 Okay, did you hold that in because you were worried 0:06:02.040 --> 0:06:04.200 about the judgment at the time or were you just 0:06:04.360 --> 0:06:06.600 not at a point where you'd grappled with your own sexuality? 0:06:06.920 --> 0:06:10.000 It was one hundred percent because of everyone else. If 0:06:10.000 --> 0:06:11.480 it was a perfect world, I would have come out 0:06:11.560 --> 0:06:13.200 the moment I realized when I was eight and when 0:06:13.240 --> 0:06:13.799 I was nine. 0:06:13.960 --> 0:06:15.800 How does it make you feel then seeing this, I 0:06:15.800 --> 0:06:17.720 mean knowing that one you were school captain in your 0:06:17.760 --> 0:06:21.120 school and seeing what's going on in Victoria that if 0:06:21.160 --> 0:06:23.760 you go to a Presbyterian school there that if you 0:06:23.800 --> 0:06:25.560 are a queer kid or if you're someone who is 0:06:25.600 --> 0:06:28.279 not even queer, if you're sexually active, that you're no 0:06:28.320 --> 0:06:31.200 longer potentially allowed to have a role of leadership within 0:06:31.200 --> 0:06:33.400 the school because it doesn't uphold the Christian values in 0:06:33.440 --> 0:06:33.800 the school. 0:06:33.880 --> 0:06:35.960 Ridiculous. I mean, one, I think you made this point, Laura. 0:06:36.080 --> 0:06:37.520 How are they going to police it? I mean, are 0:06:37.560 --> 0:06:38.719 they going to go on your phone and see if 0:06:38.720 --> 0:06:41.320 you've got gay tinder or like look through your outside. Yeah, 0:06:41.360 --> 0:06:42.599 you turn up to school and then have a metal 0:06:42.600 --> 0:06:44.880 detector and going anyone I've got any sex toys. It's ridiculous. 0:06:44.960 --> 0:06:46.280 It's not going to be about that, but it's going 0:06:46.320 --> 0:06:48.520 to be about suppressing and I'm going to say child, 0:06:48.560 --> 0:06:51.320 because they are a child now under eighteen. It's suppressing 0:06:51.440 --> 0:06:54.000 kids to say, well, if you want to achieve anything 0:06:54.040 --> 0:06:58.040 here of significance, don't be gay, don't come out, don't 0:06:58.040 --> 0:07:00.480 be queer. And that's going to cause a hot whole 0:07:00.520 --> 0:07:01.320 bunch of problems. 0:07:01.400 --> 0:07:03.919 I can't tell you how awful it was going through 0:07:03.960 --> 0:07:07.200 school in year twelve, trying to work out my HC, 0:07:07.520 --> 0:07:10.000 trying to keep my parents happy, keep my friends happy, 0:07:10.640 --> 0:07:13.360 without the notion of potentially being different to everyone and 0:07:13.400 --> 0:07:15.360 being gay, then I realized that on top of it, 0:07:15.400 --> 0:07:17.600 then the bullying that goes on top of it, it is. 0:07:17.720 --> 0:07:19.880 It was. It was one of the worst periods of 0:07:19.880 --> 0:07:21.520 my life. That's why I didn't come out until five 0:07:21.600 --> 0:07:22.239 years after school. 0:07:22.360 --> 0:07:25.120 Not just saying it's literally the more I'm thinking about it, 0:07:25.200 --> 0:07:31.480 the more refuriated I am imagine saying you are less 0:07:31.520 --> 0:07:35.120 than you are not worthy of what your peers are 0:07:35.160 --> 0:07:37.880 worthy of because you were choosing not even I mean, 0:07:37.880 --> 0:07:39.640 we all know sometimes it's not a choice. This is 0:07:39.640 --> 0:07:43.440 the discussion. But you're less than your peer because you're queer. 0:07:43.960 --> 0:07:46.880 Is that rhymes? That is a trademark that should not 0:07:46.920 --> 0:07:49.160 be This should not be happening to these poor kids 0:07:49.200 --> 0:07:51.160 in school. Should n'p to anyone, well, it should be 0:07:51.160 --> 0:07:53.880 at a disadvantage because they identify as quickly. 0:07:53.960 --> 0:07:57.320 All it is is enforcing that this is wrong. Fundamentally, 0:07:57.840 --> 0:08:00.000 that's something that you can't change. That you were born 0:08:00.200 --> 0:08:03.679 with is wrong, and you cannot be equal to someone 0:08:03.880 --> 0:08:06.480 in your exact same year because of this difference that 0:08:06.520 --> 0:08:08.560 you cannot that you wake up every day and you 0:08:08.600 --> 0:08:11.800 were stuck with the torture that it would do to 0:08:12.320 --> 0:08:15.560 young queer kids. It upsets me but a young kid 0:08:15.600 --> 0:08:18.600 in high school, it would do irreversible damage for their 0:08:18.600 --> 0:08:19.080 whole life. 0:08:19.160 --> 0:08:21.520 Well, I think it also reinforces I mean, we know 0:08:21.600 --> 0:08:24.960 that queer kids experience bullying at school. It also reinforces 0:08:25.160 --> 0:08:27.880 that it's okay to other someone. And it's coming from 0:08:27.920 --> 0:08:29.840 the top down, the people who are in power, who 0:08:29.840 --> 0:08:32.480 are supposed to protect, who are supposed to encourage, who 0:08:32.480 --> 0:08:36.319 were supposed to help you be the best, the brightest, 0:08:36.440 --> 0:08:41.520 most engaged person. It's there saying be you, but be different, 0:08:41.800 --> 0:08:44.960 and then reinforces to everybody else that it's okay for 0:08:45.080 --> 0:08:45.880 them to other you. 0:08:45.920 --> 0:08:49.120 At the same time, did you much experience, I mean, 0:08:49.840 --> 0:08:51.920 you knew you were gay from nine years old. 0:08:51.760 --> 0:08:52.200 I was a kid. 0:08:52.280 --> 0:08:54.560 Yeah, but you obviously felt that you couldn't come out. 0:08:54.800 --> 0:08:58.920 Did you experience bullying at school because were you perceived 0:08:59.320 --> 0:09:00.959 as gay? Was assumed you are gay? 0:09:01.000 --> 0:09:02.920 What was your experience Like, Yes, I mean, you know, 0:09:02.920 --> 0:09:04.560 the six inches of quaft here at the top and 0:09:04.559 --> 0:09:06.960 being the leader of the drama department didn't help. 0:09:07.000 --> 0:09:08.680 But I don't give away yea, it was a giveaway. 0:09:08.760 --> 0:09:10.800 Yeah, but it was assumed that I was gay. I 0:09:10.800 --> 0:09:12.840 had got all the slurs under the sun and I'm 0:09:13.000 --> 0:09:15.640 lucky that I had a great family, and I was 0:09:15.720 --> 0:09:17.760 lucky that I was headstrong enough. But you get one 0:09:17.840 --> 0:09:20.640 kid who has it's awful. You get one kid who's 0:09:20.640 --> 0:09:23.280 got a tough upbringing and he's also grappling with their sexuality, 0:09:23.320 --> 0:09:27.080 and that is enough to really ruin someone's life. 0:09:27.320 --> 0:09:30.040 Yeah, and I mean this coming from a public school, 0:09:30.320 --> 0:09:33.880 where I'm guessing was more accepting than say a Presbyterian school, 0:09:33.880 --> 0:09:36.720 where they are making it very clear how not acceptable 0:09:36.840 --> 0:09:39.200 it is, and that's being reinforced. One of the things 0:09:39.240 --> 0:09:42.120 I thought was really interesting. So the Scotch College chairman, 0:09:42.160 --> 0:09:45.160 Alex Sloan came out and said, we will continue to 0:09:45.200 --> 0:09:49.480 reflect values of respect, tolerance and inclusion. It's okay to 0:09:49.520 --> 0:09:52.080 say one thing, but you're doing the complete opposite. There 0:09:52.160 --> 0:09:55.000 is nothing about tolerance or inclusion that's happening here. When 0:09:55.040 --> 0:09:57.319 you say that children who are queer cannot take leadership, 0:09:57.440 --> 0:09:58.480 calling bullshit on Sloan. 0:09:58.559 --> 0:09:58.839 Sorry. 0:09:59.320 --> 0:10:02.440 Yeah. Also, if you your beliefs stopping others from doing 0:10:02.480 --> 0:10:05.440 something that is inherently part of them, they're not beliefs. 0:10:05.240 --> 0:10:06.359 It's discrimination. 0:10:07.400 --> 0:10:10.440 It's also just saying I am so furious. It's also 0:10:10.559 --> 0:10:14.320 just saying that queer people essentially do not have the 0:10:14.360 --> 0:10:18.720 skills to be successful or leaders in any aspect of life. 0:10:19.080 --> 0:10:21.040 It's saying how shameful it is. It's bringing it back 0:10:21.080 --> 0:10:21.400 to shame. 0:10:21.440 --> 0:10:23.200 And I think that we've worked so hard to try 0:10:23.200 --> 0:10:25.160 and get to a place where people do not feel 0:10:25.160 --> 0:10:26.599 shameful about their sexuality. 0:10:26.640 --> 0:10:28.800 And it's one step forward seventeen steps back. 0:10:28.840 --> 0:10:30.520 And if you want to push gay people out, enjoy 0:10:30.559 --> 0:10:33.079 having no entertainment. I mean every show you watch is 0:10:33.400 --> 0:10:35.880 produced created. I'm gay. I'm talking on the radio. Turn 0:10:35.920 --> 0:10:37.480 the radio off if you don't want to hear me. Yeah, 0:10:37.520 --> 0:10:39.400 I mean, I mean, nothing will be fun anymore if 0:10:39.440 --> 0:10:40.360 you get rid of the gay people. 0:10:40.360 --> 0:10:43.080 It's true, the gay you're the only fun ones that 0:10:43.080 --> 0:10:43.360 there are. 0:10:43.440 --> 0:10:46.440 That's exactly right. But on a serious note, thoughts are 0:10:46.480 --> 0:10:48.280 out there, kids who are going through this because it 0:10:48.400 --> 0:10:50.440 is rough. And my dms are always open. 0:10:50.679 --> 0:10:54.040 Absolutely, and I second that Mitch's dms are always open, 0:10:54.720 --> 0:10:56.960 but ours are too. I was a joke, but ours, 0:10:57.160 --> 0:11:00.760 we're always it now. It's no secret that I was 0:11:01.040 --> 0:11:04.040 single for a very long time, a solid decade. I 0:11:04.120 --> 0:11:06.000 was on the app swiping left, right and center, and. 0:11:06.000 --> 0:11:07.480 I got callouses on your fingers. 0:11:07.640 --> 0:11:10.520 I had IRSI and my thumb. Yeah, it caused me 0:11:10.520 --> 0:11:12.880 a lot of problems. I saw wrists things like that. 0:11:12.880 --> 0:11:14.400 Well that was from the swiping before you guys, get 0:11:14.400 --> 0:11:17.120 ahead of yourself. But I came across a lot of 0:11:17.120 --> 0:11:18.760 people in that time, a lot of dates, even came 0:11:18.760 --> 0:11:22.120 across Chanting Tatum. I came across some themes people on Raia. Yeah, 0:11:22.480 --> 0:11:24.160 because I was on all the apps. I was on 0:11:24.200 --> 0:11:27.240 so many apps, I had no storage on my phone. 0:11:27.360 --> 0:11:30.600 But one person I did not come across is a 0:11:30.760 --> 0:11:33.840 man by the name of Stephan Pierre Tomlin. He's thirty 0:11:33.840 --> 0:11:35.960 two and I don't know how I didn't come across 0:11:36.000 --> 0:11:40.480 him because he is officially Tinder's most swiped man. He 0:11:40.600 --> 0:11:44.000 is the most swiped person in the world on Tinder. 0:11:44.080 --> 0:11:50.079 That was in twenty seventeen, fourteen thousand, six hundred right swipes. 0:11:50.880 --> 0:11:53.720 I want to know how the hell someone does that, 0:11:53.960 --> 0:11:56.120 So I decided to call him. He's in London. It's 0:11:56.160 --> 0:11:58.120 four I am Hypierre. 0:11:59.000 --> 0:12:00.440 How are you fun? 0:12:00.640 --> 0:12:02.440 Yeah? Really well, thanks thanks for having me. 0:12:02.480 --> 0:12:02.760 Guys. 0:12:03.600 --> 0:12:05.960 I need to know how on earth is it even 0:12:06.040 --> 0:12:08.920 remotely possible to have fourteen thousand matches? Like, how much 0:12:08.960 --> 0:12:12.120 time do you spend on Tinder in order to rack 0:12:12.240 --> 0:12:13.320 up that many swipes? 0:12:14.400 --> 0:12:16.840 Do you know what? Yeah, obviously it became in a 0:12:16.840 --> 0:12:20.240 bit of a game for me at the time, quite 0:12:20.240 --> 0:12:23.800 a little. Yeah, it was quite addictive. But no, I 0:12:23.840 --> 0:12:26.960 spent probably about two hours a day wow on Tinder 0:12:27.440 --> 0:12:28.880 back in twenty seventeen. 0:12:29.640 --> 0:12:32.320 Wow, Stephan Pierre. I need to know. People in the 0:12:32.320 --> 0:12:34.559 car would be thinking, what the hell does this guy 0:12:34.640 --> 0:12:38.240 look like? Because to get that many right swipes right 0:12:38.240 --> 0:12:40.120 through to one on the apps, right is yes, left 0:12:40.200 --> 0:12:42.120 is no. So I mean, how tall are you? Do 0:12:42.120 --> 0:12:44.040 you want to? I mean you're handsome, You've got beautiful, 0:12:44.120 --> 0:12:45.640 beautiful eyes, white teeth. 0:12:45.960 --> 0:12:48.160 Thank you so much. You're so kind. But I mean 0:12:48.200 --> 0:12:50.640 it is four thirty in the morning, so I'm probably 0:12:50.720 --> 0:12:51.959 not looking the best right now. 0:12:52.480 --> 0:12:53.560 A man, you're pretty good. 0:12:53.640 --> 0:12:57.240 Yeah, I'm currently well. I'm six foot two and a half. 0:12:58.280 --> 0:13:02.959 I've been a fashion model for six sorry, thirteen years. Signed. 0:13:03.600 --> 0:13:06.280 I've worked with some big brands like D squared, Dormoni, 0:13:06.480 --> 0:13:07.600 Birbery And. 0:13:09.040 --> 0:13:10.120 Is that what your profiles like? 0:13:10.120 --> 0:13:11.600 It's all dark and handsome. 0:13:11.679 --> 0:13:14.199 But let us take all the boxes. Let us know 0:13:14.200 --> 0:13:17.120 what your profile is like. Because you've I mean, fourteen thousand, 0:13:17.120 --> 0:13:19.400 six hundred people swipe right, So give us some tips. 0:13:19.520 --> 0:13:23.360 What are your pictures like and what you buy? 0:13:23.520 --> 0:13:28.520 Yeah, so the first picture was a professional one, yeah, 0:13:28.559 --> 0:13:33.680 and it was a portrait photo of myself. The bio 0:13:33.960 --> 0:13:36.560 is quite snappy. I think I had a little joke 0:13:36.600 --> 0:13:38.960 in there. I'm not actually on Tinder at the moment. 0:13:40.280 --> 0:13:42.680 And the pictures have to be really you have to 0:13:42.679 --> 0:13:44.640 be careful not to have your friends in the pictures 0:13:45.080 --> 0:13:48.239 because then it becomes a game of like where's Wally. Yeah, 0:13:48.280 --> 0:13:50.680 and if you've got it depends on your your hobbies 0:13:50.720 --> 0:13:52.880 as well. So mine's flying, so I had quite a 0:13:52.880 --> 0:13:55.120 few pictures of me flying as well, and then you 0:13:55.160 --> 0:13:57.959 sort of attract people into aviation. But I mean, if 0:13:57.960 --> 0:14:01.160 you're like into horse riding, then it's always recommended to 0:14:01.320 --> 0:14:04.040 put a picture of your hobby in as well. Always helps. 0:14:04.120 --> 0:14:06.880 So in order to go through this many swipes and matches, 0:14:07.520 --> 0:14:10.280 did you have your like parameters set to everything? Were 0:14:10.280 --> 0:14:12.080 you like you can be up to one hundred and 0:14:12.120 --> 0:14:14.600 live in Spain? What was your parameters for dating? 0:14:14.800 --> 0:14:17.000 Yeah? They were quite wide actually, I think at that 0:14:17.120 --> 0:14:20.520 time I was probably eighteen, not to forty five. 0:14:21.560 --> 0:14:22.200 Forty five. 0:14:22.240 --> 0:14:26.280 That's a wide mit. So how many of these are 0:14:26.320 --> 0:14:28.520 you turning around into actual dates? 0:14:29.360 --> 0:14:31.680 Do you know what? I was quite fussy actually because 0:14:31.720 --> 0:14:34.360 initially when Tinder told me that I was the most 0:14:34.400 --> 0:14:37.040 white man, it was on statistics, so it's how many 0:14:37.040 --> 0:14:41.440 people write swipe you? And yeah, being a fashion model 0:14:41.440 --> 0:14:44.120 traveling up and down the country and being on national 0:14:44.120 --> 0:14:47.200 TV as well, I've done like eight or nine dating shows, 0:14:47.240 --> 0:14:48.720 so my face was quite familiar. 0:14:49.560 --> 0:14:51.080 So you're still single. 0:14:52.640 --> 0:14:59.120 I'm actually I'm actually seeing someone at the moment. Yeah, 0:14:59.200 --> 0:15:02.280 I am seeing so at the moment. Yeah, just seeing 0:15:02.280 --> 0:15:04.440 how things go at the moment. To be fair, I'm 0:15:04.480 --> 0:15:11.560 actually helping unfortunate men at the moment using AI. Yeah, 0:15:11.720 --> 0:15:13.200 I'm sort of love coaching at the moment. 0:15:15.240 --> 0:15:20.400 When you say unfortunate men, explain what you're doing. So 0:15:20.440 --> 0:15:22.520 you're profiting off being the most wipe men on Tinder. 0:15:22.640 --> 0:15:24.880 How are you using AI to help other guys? 0:15:25.160 --> 0:15:28.240 Yeah, so you've actually made an app, which which Yeah, 0:15:28.320 --> 0:15:32.560 So I'm using AI, Chat, GPT and some special AI prompts. 0:15:32.920 --> 0:15:36.480 We basically ask them for photos and we put them 0:15:36.480 --> 0:15:38.680 through we put them through the software and it makes 0:15:38.880 --> 0:15:42.160 about forty to forty five AI generated pictures. Some people 0:15:42.240 --> 0:15:44.680 say catfishing, but I don't think it is. It's just yeah, 0:15:44.760 --> 0:15:46.200 it's just being ahead of the game. 0:15:46.040 --> 0:15:48.840 Really, but it's changing their picture. 0:15:48.920 --> 0:15:51.080 I know. But if you compare it in comparison to 0:15:51.200 --> 0:15:53.840 like in the past and I was swiping, there's a 0:15:53.840 --> 0:15:55.640 lot of girls that use filters. 0:15:55.320 --> 0:16:02.840 Right, Oh, I get his No, I get his point. Yeah, girls, yeah. 0:16:00.160 --> 0:16:00.640 Guys. 0:16:03.320 --> 0:16:07.520 Attracting a certain type of guy, right that that that's 0:16:07.560 --> 0:16:08.560 exactly the same thing. 0:16:08.920 --> 0:16:11.200 Don't you feel like you Yeah, you turned up and 0:16:11.200 --> 0:16:13.000 you were like, hey, you tricked me with your filters. 0:16:13.000 --> 0:16:16.360 Don't you think you're tricking people now band filters? 0:16:17.280 --> 0:16:19.600 Well yeah, yeah, I kind of felt like that at 0:16:19.600 --> 0:16:20.960 some stage. But at the end of the day, you 0:16:21.000 --> 0:16:21.840 still bag the date. 0:16:21.960 --> 0:16:25.720 Right, Why do you think people need this service? Like 0:16:25.760 --> 0:16:29.320 when you say unfortunate men? What makes a man unfortunate? 0:16:30.240 --> 0:16:33.240 Yeah? When I say unfortunate, I mean it's someone that 0:16:33.440 --> 0:16:39.520 wouldn't necessarily match others as it's quite a hard one. Actually, 0:16:39.640 --> 0:16:41.680 it's just someone that needs help with their online dating. 0:16:42.400 --> 0:16:44.960 For example, it could be someone that's you know, not 0:16:45.120 --> 0:16:47.480 very good at the chat who needs a bit of 0:16:47.520 --> 0:16:51.120 coaching with their bio. We actually go through My team 0:16:51.200 --> 0:16:54.080 goes through their social media and tells them to sort of, 0:16:54.280 --> 0:16:56.440 you know, take down pictures, change this and that. So 0:16:56.480 --> 0:16:59.600 it's like fine tweaking and we've we've we've got a 0:16:59.640 --> 0:17:02.520 high so sas rate. We've changed quite a lot of 0:17:02.560 --> 0:17:03.160