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Speaker 1: Gold it's Jonesy Amanda driving you home.

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Speaker 2: It's always a treat to have Ursula Carlson on the show.

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Speaker 2: She's got sharp one liners, as we know, wild wit.

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Speaker 2: She's bringing her very special KII Aussie South African flair

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Speaker 2: with her. That's an unusual subset. She's coming to Australia

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Speaker 2: for another tour, which the tourist called Fatty on a Yacht.

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Speaker 2: Are there any questions?

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Speaker 3: Ula? She is, all right, my favorite Amanda and Jonesy

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Speaker 3: duo in the world.

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Speaker 1: I'm pleased to hear it. By that.

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Speaker 4: I know that you're right now sitting in front of

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Speaker 4: your fireplace, not holding a pipe, but your favorite Amanda

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Speaker 4: and Jonesy duo.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. Out of all of the Amanda and Jonesy's, you

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Speaker 3: two are my favorite.

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Speaker 1: Very happy to hear that. In this alternate universe though,

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Speaker 1: Amanda gets top Billy.

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Speaker 2: And I'm very happy for it and I appreciate it.

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Speaker 3: I'm just going up for beticle mate.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, oh good save.

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Speaker 2: Can I say that's the way?

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Speaker 3: God?

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Speaker 1: That's very South African of you.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's right, Fatny on a Yacht.

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Speaker 2: I hope that this was a title you came up with.

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Speaker 3: It sure was you know what. And I've done a

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Speaker 3: few interviews and people are so hesitant to say it.

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Speaker 3: I'm like, just read it off the paper, mate, it's

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Speaker 3: all right. And yeah there's you know, because I'm a storyteller,

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Speaker 3: and this is what happened. I missed a brief I

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Speaker 3: was supposed to. You know, a friend said to me,

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Speaker 3: we're going on a boat. And now when you say

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Speaker 3: to me, we're going on a friend's dad's boat, which

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Speaker 3: is what she said, I assume we're going on someone's

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Speaker 3: dad's tending to go fishing. But it wasn't. It was

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Speaker 3: a super yacht. This thing had a hot tub on

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Speaker 3: the back, It had jet skis and at everything and

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Speaker 3: a library. I'm like, who can afford to have a lot,

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Speaker 3: you know, a superyacht with a library and you can't

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Speaker 3: afford a kendle. Come on, mate, I think were the times.

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Speaker 1: Were you welcomed and happy?

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Speaker 3: There?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: I mean it was a it was a weird and

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Speaker 3: to action initially because I was wearing you know, if

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Speaker 3: you know you're going out on a boat, safety first.

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Speaker 3: You know, I've got young children. I look after my mom.

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Speaker 3: You know, You've got to stay alive in these situations.

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Speaker 3: So I wore my life jacket that I bought at

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Speaker 3: a garage sale two houses down, and yeah, they had

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Speaker 3: a bit of mold on it, but I did water blasted,

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Speaker 3: so I figured all the bad stuff was all fit,

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Speaker 3: and so I rocked up with that. And then it's

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Speaker 3: like full below deck situation. They had a crew on

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Speaker 3: this thing, and the captain said to me, you don't

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Speaker 3: need your life jacket, and I said, I think you'll

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Speaker 3: find I do, like I've seen the ads wear a

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Speaker 3: life jacket. And he said to me, listen, if this

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Speaker 3: thing goes down, I'll give you a jet ski. And

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Speaker 3: I thought, you know, this guy doesn't know me. Who

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Speaker 3: says I wanted jets ski. I mean, I do want

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Speaker 3: a jetski. But you know, I saw he can't tell

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Speaker 3: me what to do. So I wore that moldy old

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Speaker 3: luck jacket the whole time.

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Speaker 4: So you're already, you're already having a mutiny before you've

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Speaker 4: got on you've gone on board.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, And I was not dressed the part. And so

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Speaker 3: when the other passengers started coming, you know, the other friends.

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Speaker 3: Everyone else there was dressed like they were going to

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Speaker 3: the Melbourne Cup, and I was dressed in my cargo shorts,

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Speaker 3: the shirt that I paint in, the secondhand life jacket,

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Speaker 3: my cap that says Queer all Year, and my boat

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Speaker 3: shoes that I bought from Kmart for five dollars at

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Speaker 3: the bargain bind anyway, And so when my friend rocks up,

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Speaker 3: she walks on up to me and she goes, what

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Speaker 3: is happening? And I said, no, what is happening? And

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Speaker 3: then because she's got a hat, a dress and everything,

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Speaker 3: and I'm like, what is happening? And she goes, I

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Speaker 3: told you we're going on a boat. I go exactly,

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Speaker 3: And I even have like the esky pat, I've got

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Speaker 3: my fishing rod. We're going Fishing's like, I not once

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Speaker 3: that I saw we're going fishing. I said, yea, you

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Speaker 3: said we're going on someone's dance boat. You know, because

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Speaker 3: I'm a bergain, they were going fishing.

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Speaker 1: I could have been yeah, but it might be Daddy

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Speaker 1: Warbucks in your circle.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, no, you know, and here we are. So yeah,

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Speaker 3: the show is quite happy and friendly.

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Speaker 4: Maybe we should incorporate the fireplace that you're sitting in

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Speaker 4: front of right now is part of us your show.

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Speaker 3: Chimney Sweeping today? Did you know you stilet to do that.

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Speaker 2: Are you joking? No?

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Speaker 1: Is it a child?

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Speaker 3: No, there's actual body, and apparently you can buy the

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Speaker 3: kits and do it yourself. I'm like, no, thanks.

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Speaker 1: I do like the idea of a deckenzie and chimney

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Speaker 1: sweep coming in.

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Speaker 3: You know, the God comes in and he said to me,

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Speaker 3: you've got a beautiful fireplace. I go thumber down.

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Speaker 2: Mate?

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Speaker 1: Does he look at the mantelpiece while he's stating that fire?

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Speaker 2: You know?

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Speaker 3: I was like, keep your eyes on the fire, it's

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Speaker 3: not up top.

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Speaker 1: It's always great to talk to you.

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Speaker 4: For texts to see Ursula Carson, head to live nation

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Speaker 4: dot com dot au.

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Speaker 1: I I captain over.

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Speaker 3: Yes, that's right, We're all yeah.

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Speaker 1: I'll be on the boat and