Speaker 1: Flex and Frooms.
Speaker 2: Flex and Frooms. This is the Flex and Frooms catch
Speaker 2: up podcast. Hey one's day ones and all the ones
Speaker 2: in between. It's Flex and Frooms. We're gonna get to
Speaker 2: a podcast because we're running late. Okay, Flex and Frooms
Speaker 2: on Caita. The Internet has coined it, however, we will
Speaker 2: steal it as per It's Barefoot Boy Summer twenty twenty three.
Speaker 2: I don't know about you, Flex, but walking around the city,
Speaker 2: why am I seeing men? Gentlemen?
Speaker 1: Am I seeing men? Why?
Speaker 2: Fray tell men not wearing shoes in the city. It's
Speaker 2: becoming a trend Sydney City. Reading here in The Cut
Speaker 2: New York actually about same thing.
Speaker 1: So you haven't seen it with your own an stolen
Speaker 1: the data from the Cut and New York based publication.
Speaker 2: I did see it my local cafe the other day.
Speaker 2: A man was wearing barefoot. We are in a beachside location.
Speaker 2: I will be fair, but he had no business not
Speaker 2: wearing shoes. It goes on talking Jacober Lordie shoeless braving
Speaker 2: the La streets on a coffee or musician Mike Sabbath
Speaker 2: aka Barefoot member of Sean Mendez Smoothie Squad. What are
Speaker 2: all these words. In spring twenty twenty three, the Italian
Speaker 2: brand Etro sent male models down its runway wearing short shorts, kaftans,
Speaker 2: breezy blouse ons, paired with feet as naked as the
Speaker 2: day they were born. No mind, I say, I'm over it.
Speaker 2: Put your feet away, Okay. Callouses are a real thing.
Speaker 2: My mum said to me, you need to stop wearing
Speaker 2: crocs because your feet are cracking.
Speaker 1: She said.
Speaker 2: Cracked feet is not the look of the twenty twenty
Speaker 2: three girl freem Indy. I did see comedian Eloi's f
Speaker 2: toss Do a story about how people who walk around
Speaker 2: barefoot like think that they're so hot and cool, and
Speaker 2: it's like, listen, shoes, let's get some shoes. I think
Speaker 2: the idea is that people think that they're so cool.
Speaker 1: It's a statement. It's a statement.
Speaker 2: Put shoes back on, is what everybody's saying.
Speaker 1: Do you think the Barefoot Boy summer ethos is comparable
Speaker 1: to the gen Z camera shake? I'm not making content.
Speaker 1: I just ended up on this app, and I will
Speaker 1: show you that by shaking the camera and a bresplay
Speaker 1: shake place speak.
Speaker 2: I don't even care that I'm outside. I just rolled
Speaker 2: out of here, got onto the train, walked into a cafe,
Speaker 2: and now I'm sitting with my feet crossed like a
Speaker 2: little dog.
Speaker 1: The crowd goes wild. Thank do you hear them? There
Speaker 1: it is? There are two new love languages. I don't
Speaker 1: want to be the person who's like in case you
Speaker 1: don't know what a love language is. I would hope
Speaker 1: you've done the work, however, and the research however. Doctor
Speaker 1: Gary Chapman, New York Times bestseller of the Five Love Languages,
Speaker 1: The Secret to a Love That Last teaches us that
Speaker 1: every individual has a preferred way they want to give
Speaker 1: and receive love, whether you know it or you don't
Speaker 1: know it. But a big part of it comes from
Speaker 1: where you weren't given love, or where you were when
Speaker 1: you were younger, how you were rated and nurture, et cetera. Now,
Speaker 1: up until recently, the five key love languages, it's physical touch, quality, time,
Speaker 1: acts of service, words, affirmation, and receiving gifts. So ideally
Speaker 1: you would know which is your preferred primary love language.
Speaker 1: You could resonate with all of them. You could be like,
Speaker 1: I want all of them, but generally there is one
Speaker 1: that you ultimately give with ease and like to receive
Speaker 1: with ease. For instance, I like acts of service. Obsessed
Speaker 1: with people doing things for me, even things I don't
Speaker 1: even need, because I think it takes a certain amount
Speaker 1: of care and consideration for someone to do something for you. Yes,
Speaker 1: I'm obsessed with it, I would say. In terms of giving,
Speaker 1: I'm a words of affirmation type of person. I'm going
Speaker 1: to tell you how I feel about you, that you're great,
Speaker 1: that you speak well, that you're empowering.
Speaker 2: Call for me.
Speaker 1: How do you give them a receipt?
Speaker 2: I also give words of affirmation, I would say. And
Speaker 2: I like to get physical touch with I don't get
Speaker 2: enough of. So when this spake finishes, I'm going to
Speaker 2: read downloaded dating up. Guys.
Speaker 1: I just thought that when you were speaking.
Speaker 2: It's a real talk guys.
Speaker 1: You need physical toutch Okay. Look, and this is why
Speaker 1: I'm a hugger. And this is why I feel like
Speaker 1: I can grow to be that out of touch person
Speaker 1: who doesn't realize that you can't go around hugging in cheek.
Speaker 1: I do that now, No, babe, I was a menace
Speaker 1: during COVID. Let me tell you, let me tell you
Speaker 1: spread up anyway. E Harmony recently did a survey, and
Speaker 1: they revealed that twenty six percent of people have changed
Speaker 1: the way they expressed love in a romantic relationship in
Speaker 1: the past year. Why switch up? How that's more than
Speaker 1: a quarter of people. Have you checked in with your
Speaker 1: partner recently? They could be switching up on you. Also,
Speaker 1: twenty five percent similarly have changed the way they prefer
Speaker 1: to receive love again switching up? We need to do
Speaker 1: as I suggested, the quarterly yearly relationship check ins. Are
Speaker 1: we still on the same page? Do you like me,
Speaker 1: like I like you? Et cetera, et cetera. Now, nearly
Speaker 1: half of the people who participated in the survey so
Speaker 1: that they weren't really sure if the five categories that
Speaker 1: currently exist really encompass how they want to give and
Speaker 1: receive love, and they would prefer if a few more
Speaker 1: be integrated or incorporated. The first is shared experiences. So
Speaker 1: this sounds a lot like quality time, but it really isn't.
Speaker 1: It's more so like adventuring and expanding yourself with someone.
Speaker 1: So a lot of the times quality time turns into
Speaker 1: we sit on the couch and watch Netflix together, we
Speaker 1: exist in the same room, we share our home. But
Speaker 1: this is more so Can we build together, build tasks together,
Speaker 1: do something exciting or expansive together. Can we go on
Speaker 1: a hike together. Can we build a puzzle together? Can
Speaker 1: we go in an escape room together? Can we go
Speaker 1: on a holiday together and actually spend time that is different. Also,
Speaker 1: the other love language is emotional security, which I think
Speaker 1: is a red hot one. It's feeling emotionally seen and
Speaker 1: taken care of, and a lot of people find that,
Speaker 1: you know, they would assume that being there physically is enough.
Speaker 1: I've definitely had circumstances with friends and family and partners
Speaker 1: where I've thought my physical presence was enough and emotionally
Speaker 1: I didn't have to show up like I'm here, I
Speaker 1: know we're hanging out. No no, no, no no no.
Speaker 1: So signs that you are emotionally secure or connecting with
Speaker 1: people is that you feel not a lot of shame
Speaker 1: to ask questions, to share things about yourself. You can
Speaker 1: talk through your feelings quite easily. You feel like it's
Speaker 1: always safe to express what you need and when you
Speaker 1: need it and how you need it, which is cool
Speaker 1: because when you reflect on some of your closest relationships,
Speaker 1: I'm sure you'd be like, yeah, I do feel emotionally secure. Actually,
Speaker 1: there's literally no issue with being like, hey, babes, I
Speaker 1: need a little something from you. Can you help me out?
Speaker 2: That is my love language. Yeah, you're a tea.
Speaker 1: I want to get it through.
Speaker 2: I want to get that be real.
Speaker 1: You keep saying be real, and I feel like it's
Speaker 1: because you want to say the fin for real, but
Speaker 1: you don't want to swear on air, and now it
Speaker 1: just seems like you're a company chill for be real.
Speaker 1: So I feel like every.
Speaker 2: Time every time I say my brain's split, I meant
Speaker 2: to see the art fragments. I need to say be serious,
Speaker 2: serious or be for real?
Speaker 1: Yeah, be real? Okay, for real.
Speaker 2: You're listening to Flex and Frooms on Keita. I want
Speaker 2: to know FLEXI are young people in Australia really unhappy?
Speaker 2: It's a bit of a somber note.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you really took it right down.
Speaker 2: As you know everybody, Tuesday's my least favorite Daisy, that's
Speaker 2: when I'm bringing the terrible news. So, according to the
Speaker 2: results of the thirty ninth Australian Unity Well Being Index,
Speaker 2: which is from Deacon University and Australian Unity, People Unhappy.
Speaker 1: The people between the age range of eighteen to twenty
Speaker 1: five recorded a seventy three percent satisfaction rate, which is
Speaker 1: a whole percent lower than the next age group, which
Speaker 1: means that statistically speaking, young people are less happy than
Speaker 1: older people. I think what's getting to be really frustrating
Speaker 1: is that our understanding of happiness is so intangible and
Speaker 1: studies like this are so binary and specifically you're happy
Speaker 1: or not happy? Could you be happy? I don't know
Speaker 1: how much happy I've got in me? Do you know
Speaker 1: if I knew for sure concrete that the happy that
Speaker 1: I've experienced seeing Childish Gambino perform in twenty eighteen with
Speaker 1: all my friends like, we're yelling, we're squealing, people are
Speaker 1: pissed off next to us. If I'd known that was
Speaker 1: the happiest I could get, then I would say, Okay, dated,
Speaker 1: I'm not peaking, not peaking the level. How do I
Speaker 1: know how much happier I can get? And then what
Speaker 1: is it based off? Do you know what it is? Though?
Speaker 1: And I hate to be the person who says this,
Speaker 1: but introspection without guidance does not make for a happy person.
Speaker 1: How do we get these guided Why all our philosophers
Speaker 1: say it, Why our our comedians say it.
Speaker 2: Yes, I totally agree. You need routine, and some would
Speaker 2: say you need to get up and see the sunrise
Speaker 2: for these ten minutes.
Speaker 1: Okay, human.
Speaker 2: Did a couple of humans were still and focus another
Speaker 2: fantastic book. Yeah, I will say for me, I would
Speaker 2: say personal connections are the route to happiness. However, how
Speaker 2: do you cultivate them?
Speaker 1: You need spare time, I personally feel and I struggled
Speaker 1: with it a lot myself, of not growing out of
Speaker 1: high school dynamics and realizing that the core factors you
Speaker 1: need to be happy won't be provided for you. So
Speaker 1: in high school, all your friends were in the same place.
Speaker 1: You had to be there every day. Your parents paid
Speaker 1: your phone bill. The food was already made for you,
Speaker 1: and if it wasn't, you could easily go and source
Speaker 1: it from the cupboards. You didn't have to buy toilet paper,
Speaker 1: you don't have to buy mental products. Everything that you
Speaker 1: needed to cultivate a happy life was there for you,
Speaker 1: whether or not you realized it. And I think a
Speaker 1: few of us are finding it difficult to bridge the
Speaker 1: gap between that reality and our current existence. We're still
Speaker 1: waiting for someone to make it better. We forget that
Speaker 1: there was so much intention in how we did stuff.
Speaker 1: Then it's like, oh, we hung out all day, we
Speaker 1: went to park parties. We forced ourselves to live. We
Speaker 1: were so obsessed with like living and right now we
Speaker 1: and I'll speak for myself, I can be so passive
Speaker 1: assuming that the fun things will happen. I also think
Speaker 1: that out of a score of one hundred, Australians average
Speaker 1: a seventy five cent satisfaction rate, knowing that it's the
Speaker 1: lowest it's ever been. However, seventy five out of one hundred,
Speaker 1: it's not that low.
Speaker 2: Bab Yeah, I mean it's not that low.
Speaker 1: I'm quite happy.
Speaker 2: It's giving.
Speaker 1: It gives.
Speaker 2: Always on the ABAC looking at new and interesting fand
Speaker 2: angle articles, there was this ABC article about women leaving
Speaker 2: their jobs to seek well being, creativity and freedom as
Speaker 2: a way of life.
Speaker 1: It I love that.
Speaker 2: Yeah. It's based on a study from Deloitte, which, as
Speaker 2: we know everybody, we're still not sure what it is,
Speaker 2: but we keep coming back to their studies.
Speaker 1: Twenty twenty three Women at Work reports sounds fake.
Speaker 2: No, And they surveyed five hundred Australian women and they
Speaker 2: found that sixty percent left their jobs in twenty twenty two,
Speaker 2: which is more than twenty twenty and twenty twenty one combined,
Speaker 2: and they cited a lack of flexibility around working hours
Speaker 2: as a reason for leaving. Declining physical health and an
Speaker 2: ability to switch off from work wall also contributing factors
Speaker 2: because thirty percent of women report ongoing burnout.
Speaker 1: These are quotes from the article by Life Please, I
Speaker 1: mean no plagiarism here, direct quotes from the article that.
Speaker 2: Was giving like UNI shooting learning journalism like the back
Speaker 2: of their eyes are faltering as they try and read
Speaker 2: a Telly prompt.
Speaker 1: But I said what I said, and it's true, and
Speaker 1: I love it. I love this idea that people are
Speaker 1: getting out of that commiserating, paralytic phase of knowing what
Speaker 1: is wrong and now feeling the ages to do something
Speaker 1: about it, even if it's not the best decision, the
Speaker 1: right decision, but it's a step away from what is
Speaker 1: keeping you in this like depleting state.
Speaker 2: Some of the comments said, yeah, it must be nice.
Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, it must be because what how happen
Speaker 1: to get it? Burn out? Burn out? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Everything everything comes at a cost. But I thought that
Speaker 2: was really cool and I relate to that. I can imagine,
Speaker 2: you know, one day, getting a hobby when I'm a
Speaker 2: bit older, do the child rearing obviously, and continue with
Speaker 2: the part time job, and then you know, I'd really
Speaker 2: like to have a fun retirement that involves maybe not camping,
Speaker 2: but perhaps going to lots of midday movies on the
Speaker 2: cheap ass Tuesday five. Okay, Mattinee, Yeah, it's give me
Speaker 2: Mattinee with Little Chocop and see. I'm on the other
Speaker 2: end of I want to say spectrum, but it's anything
Speaker 2: really a spectrum.
Speaker 1: It's just the thought I'm having. I don't know if
Speaker 1: it's on the other end of your spectrum. Stop diagnostic techniques.
Speaker 1: Can you not just have a thought? Everything is had
Speaker 1: an epiphany? I had a okay that I don't know
Speaker 1: if the other end of now is guaranteed to happen.
Speaker 1: So right now we're in burnout rise and grind era,
Speaker 1: and the other side is where we get to be
Speaker 1: post burnout and we've got time to live and enjoy it.
Speaker 1: I don't know if that's ever coming. The system that
Speaker 1: we're in and the positions that we hold. As much
Speaker 1: as it pains us emotionally and mentally to do our jobs.
Speaker 1: Sometimes it also benefits us greatly, and I don't think
Speaker 1: we can really have the benefits without the suffering in
Speaker 1: the way that we benefit.
Speaker 2: Now always with the suffering flex, do you.
Speaker 1: Know what I mean? So I like this idea of
Speaker 1: people just you know, being like, I'm nipping it in
Speaker 1: the bud. I don't even know if there's gonna be
Speaker 1: a way for me to balance both. I'm getting out.
Speaker 1: It's sexy and it's hot, and I feel like the
Speaker 1: phrase it must be nice. Let's use that for things
Speaker 1: like being born with good skin. Yeah, no, it must
Speaker 1: be nice. Yeah, it is nice to not have pause.
Speaker 1: It's fantastic. Okay, I'm freaking. Let's not use that for
Speaker 1: man made issues. Yeah, okay, capitalists, I agree.
Speaker 2: We live in a society.
Speaker 1: Can we limit a Friday? You've been listening to The
Speaker 1: Flex and Froom's daily podcast.
Speaker 2: For more, tune Indicator on DAB or stream it on iHeartRadio.