1 00:00:03,440 --> 00:00:05,519 Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families podcast. 2 00:00:05,880 --> 00:00:09,080 Speaker 2: It's the podcast for the time poor parent who just 3 00:00:09,240 --> 00:00:10,960 Speaker 2: once answers now, Okay. 4 00:00:11,039 --> 00:00:14,040 Speaker 3: Every Friday on the Happy Families Podcast, we talk about. 5 00:00:13,880 --> 00:00:15,400 Speaker 1: The stuff that we're doing and the stuff that we're 6 00:00:15,400 --> 00:00:17,759 Speaker 1: doing wrong. In I'll dobed it tomorrow. 7 00:00:17,920 --> 00:00:20,720 Speaker 3: This podcast episode is really about how we nail lot 8 00:00:20,760 --> 00:00:22,720 Speaker 3: or fail it as parents and how we can be 9 00:00:22,760 --> 00:00:26,680 Speaker 3: more intentional in our parenting. Kylie, we're getting close to Christmas. 10 00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:29,280 Speaker 3: Things are slowing down or speeding up. I guess depends 11 00:00:29,280 --> 00:00:30,720 Speaker 3: on how you look at it, but certainly from a 12 00:00:30,760 --> 00:00:33,199 Speaker 3: work point of view, things are slowing down. We are 13 00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:34,680 Speaker 3: fortunate that we're getting to spend a little bit more 14 00:00:34,680 --> 00:00:37,080 Speaker 3: time together as family. And in my old debt it tomorrow, 15 00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:38,480 Speaker 3: I'm going to go first. By the way, is that okay? 16 00:00:39,320 --> 00:00:41,760 Speaker 2: I'm sorry, I'm a little bit distracted. Do you know 17 00:00:41,960 --> 00:00:45,320 Speaker 2: Lily has been playing with my computer right, and she's 18 00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:49,120 Speaker 2: put a screensaber on it and it's just coming up 19 00:00:49,120 --> 00:00:51,080 Speaker 2: with the most amazing photos. 20 00:00:51,320 --> 00:00:52,960 Speaker 1: Right, Okay, Well, you need to close that. 21 00:00:53,240 --> 00:00:54,960 Speaker 2: I don't want to. I know I should, but I 22 00:00:54,960 --> 00:00:55,400 Speaker 2: don't want. 23 00:00:55,320 --> 00:00:56,800 Speaker 1: To try to have a coverson try to record a 24 00:00:56,840 --> 00:00:57,400 Speaker 1: podcast here. 25 00:00:57,480 --> 00:00:59,800 Speaker 2: All of these gorgeous pictures that I haven't seen. 26 00:00:59,640 --> 00:01:01,920 Speaker 3: For you, Okay, stop indulging for just to say, all right, 27 00:01:02,040 --> 00:01:04,280 Speaker 3: thank you, I appreciate it. Okay, So I'm going to 28 00:01:04,360 --> 00:01:06,880 Speaker 3: go first, okay, and I'm going to I'm with you. 29 00:01:06,959 --> 00:01:09,800 Speaker 3: My ill do Better Tomorrow is actually complete that you're 30 00:01:10,360 --> 00:01:11,240 Speaker 3: not even listening to me. 31 00:01:11,240 --> 00:01:11,520 Speaker 2: I'm doing. 32 00:01:11,640 --> 00:01:15,640 Speaker 3: I'm literally doing a podcast anyway at the computer. My 33 00:01:15,720 --> 00:01:19,120 Speaker 3: old do Better Tomorrow is well, I think it's a question. 34 00:01:19,440 --> 00:01:22,520 Speaker 3: I don't know that it's I want to be more intentional. 35 00:01:22,520 --> 00:01:24,640 Speaker 3: I want to get this right. So over the last 36 00:01:24,640 --> 00:01:26,640 Speaker 3: week or so, I've been really making an effort to 37 00:01:26,640 --> 00:01:28,360 Speaker 3: do something that I don't like doing much of, and 38 00:01:28,360 --> 00:01:30,840 Speaker 3: that's play games with the kids. I like to be active, 39 00:01:30,959 --> 00:01:32,720 Speaker 3: Like if you give me the choice board games or 40 00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:35,680 Speaker 3: a walk, board games or a swim, any games at 41 00:01:35,720 --> 00:01:38,120 Speaker 3: all in the house versus being outside and being active. 42 00:01:38,440 --> 00:01:40,360 Speaker 3: I'm going outside every single time. I don't want to 43 00:01:40,360 --> 00:01:42,440 Speaker 3: be inside. I want to be moving my body. Sitting 44 00:01:42,440 --> 00:01:46,160 Speaker 3: at the table and playing a game boring for me, right, 45 00:01:46,319 --> 00:01:49,040 Speaker 3: just I don't love it. But I've been working really 46 00:01:49,080 --> 00:01:52,240 Speaker 3: hard on spending some time inside with the kids playing 47 00:01:52,280 --> 00:01:54,760 Speaker 3: some games when we can't be outside for whatever reason, 48 00:01:55,240 --> 00:01:56,960 Speaker 3: and I want to share a couple of experiences with you. 49 00:01:57,240 --> 00:02:00,360 Speaker 2: I'm just going to point out that both experience says 50 00:02:00,400 --> 00:02:01,680 Speaker 2: are valid and on. 51 00:02:01,920 --> 00:02:05,680 Speaker 1: Courting, not arguing otherwise, I just don't like board games. 52 00:02:06,160 --> 00:02:07,200 Speaker 2: I'd rather be outside. 53 00:02:07,200 --> 00:02:08,680 Speaker 3: It's just my preference, Okay. 54 00:02:09,120 --> 00:02:11,160 Speaker 2: Is that because if you don't win, you get upset. 55 00:02:11,440 --> 00:02:14,000 Speaker 1: Well, the thing is I do win, and that's what 56 00:02:14,040 --> 00:02:15,040 Speaker 1: I want to talk to you about. 57 00:02:15,160 --> 00:02:17,960 Speaker 3: So the other day I was playing Monopoly, which is 58 00:02:17,960 --> 00:02:20,360 Speaker 3: the world's longest game, but I was playing with which 59 00:02:20,360 --> 00:02:20,760 Speaker 3: is why. 60 00:02:20,720 --> 00:02:22,920 Speaker 2: I do not play it. I don't know if you've noticed, 61 00:02:22,960 --> 00:02:25,640 Speaker 2: but the games that I choose don't last very long. 62 00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:27,960 Speaker 3: So I'm playing Monopoly with Emily, our nine year old, 63 00:02:28,120 --> 00:02:30,799 Speaker 3: and her cousin who is I know nine or ten 64 00:02:30,840 --> 00:02:37,160 Speaker 3: as well, Oakley, and I destroyed them like I owned, 65 00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:39,640 Speaker 3: you know, the two brown ones just after go I 66 00:02:39,639 --> 00:02:40,880 Speaker 3: owned both of those. 67 00:02:40,919 --> 00:02:44,360 Speaker 2: Plus I owned the three blue ones. So here's the 68 00:02:44,360 --> 00:02:48,520 Speaker 2: funny thing. You're not playing. Emily owns the board, and 69 00:02:48,560 --> 00:02:52,560 Speaker 2: then I also owned. Emily owns the board. She completely 70 00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:57,840 Speaker 2: smashes her brother in law. She smashed Ella to the 71 00:02:57,840 --> 00:02:59,959 Speaker 2: point where they won't even finish the game. 72 00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:01,440 Speaker 1: Well, well, this is what happened. 73 00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:03,600 Speaker 3: So not only did I own the first row, but 74 00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:05,239 Speaker 3: I as signed all the orange, plus I owned the 75 00:03:05,720 --> 00:03:07,720 Speaker 3: red and the yellow as you go from free parking 76 00:03:07,760 --> 00:03:10,760 Speaker 3: to jail, and I also owned the green ones. She 77 00:03:10,919 --> 00:03:13,160 Speaker 3: managed to get the two blue ones at the very end. 78 00:03:13,200 --> 00:03:15,959 Speaker 2: We're playing around the blue ones like park Road, park. 79 00:03:15,880 --> 00:03:17,560 Speaker 3: Land and Mayfair if you're playing the English version, but 80 00:03:17,560 --> 00:03:19,560 Speaker 3: we're playing the Australian one, so it's Orange and Sydney 81 00:03:19,560 --> 00:03:20,799 Speaker 3: Harbor regardless. 82 00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:23,200 Speaker 2: So it's the most expensive one totally. 83 00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:25,640 Speaker 1: So she had them. But I just owned everything. 84 00:03:25,680 --> 00:03:27,480 Speaker 3: And Oakley had never played before, so she had no 85 00:03:27,520 --> 00:03:32,799 Speaker 3: idea what d goodness, But I had hotels everywhere, like 86 00:03:32,919 --> 00:03:36,119 Speaker 3: I just I was and she wouldn't finish the game. 87 00:03:36,160 --> 00:03:37,920 Speaker 2: She walked away. Who wouldn't finish. 88 00:03:37,760 --> 00:03:40,560 Speaker 3: The Emily Oakley was bored after about twenty minutes, but 89 00:03:41,040 --> 00:03:44,440 Speaker 3: Emily really wanted to play till I started decimating everyone 90 00:03:44,560 --> 00:03:47,240 Speaker 3: and like, I mean, I'm playing Monopoly, I'm playing to win, 91 00:03:47,840 --> 00:03:50,040 Speaker 3: That's my point. And so anyway, there was that, and 92 00:03:50,080 --> 00:03:53,080 Speaker 3: then a couple of nights later, just the other night, 93 00:03:53,120 --> 00:03:56,920 Speaker 3: actually I was playing chess and again I just I 94 00:03:56,960 --> 00:03:59,200 Speaker 3: destroyed it, like she's done chess club and she actually 95 00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:02,440 Speaker 3: plays chess reason well, and I wasn't really concentrating, but 96 00:04:02,480 --> 00:04:05,280 Speaker 3: I still I mean, I blasted her and she's surrendered, 97 00:04:05,320 --> 00:04:06,520 Speaker 3: and she was a bit cranky about it. 98 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:07,760 Speaker 2: And then I started playing checkers. 99 00:04:07,800 --> 00:04:09,680 Speaker 3: She's never played checkers before, so I was teaching how 100 00:04:09,720 --> 00:04:12,640 Speaker 3: to play checkers, and once again, I mean, she's never 101 00:04:12,680 --> 00:04:14,360 Speaker 3: played it right, and she's playing against me. I'm nearly 102 00:04:14,360 --> 00:04:16,560 Speaker 3: fifty years old. I've got a lifetime of playing checkers 103 00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:20,040 Speaker 3: and chess, and I obliterated her. And I'm just trying 104 00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:22,760 Speaker 3: to work out is it wrong that I'm destroying my 105 00:04:22,839 --> 00:04:25,440 Speaker 3: nine year old always going to play a game because 106 00:04:25,920 --> 00:04:27,680 Speaker 3: because I think she's having fun, and I know I'm 107 00:04:27,720 --> 00:04:29,720 Speaker 3: having fun, Like I love winning, I don't care who 108 00:04:29,720 --> 00:04:30,360 Speaker 3: it's against. 109 00:04:32,160 --> 00:04:34,240 Speaker 2: It's a pretty low bar if you're winning against your 110 00:04:34,279 --> 00:04:35,720 Speaker 2: nine year old. I'm just saying, but. 111 00:04:35,680 --> 00:04:38,720 Speaker 3: A win's a win, right, I mean, nobody if you 112 00:04:38,960 --> 00:04:39,920 Speaker 3: just look at the score. 113 00:04:39,720 --> 00:04:40,880 Speaker 2: Like you're playing against a. 114 00:04:40,920 --> 00:04:42,919 Speaker 3: Nine year old, people just look at the scoreboard. They 115 00:04:42,920 --> 00:04:45,000 Speaker 3: don't ask her you were against, they don't ask how 116 00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:46,440 Speaker 3: close it was. It was just did you win or 117 00:04:46,440 --> 00:04:49,360 Speaker 3: did you not win? And I'm winning and I'm trying 118 00:04:49,400 --> 00:04:51,640 Speaker 3: to work out, Like my dad didn't never have any 119 00:04:51,680 --> 00:04:54,000 Speaker 3: mercy on me. So when I when I finally beat him, 120 00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:55,839 Speaker 3: I knew that i'd beaten him. Whether it was wrestling, 121 00:04:55,880 --> 00:04:57,840 Speaker 3: or whether it was surfing or doing anything outdoors or 122 00:04:57,839 --> 00:05:02,560 Speaker 3: even anything indoors. If I won, I legitimately won, and 123 00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:05,040 Speaker 3: it felt so good when I finally beat him. 124 00:05:05,560 --> 00:05:08,440 Speaker 2: So I don't think. I don't think they're a number one. 125 00:05:08,440 --> 00:05:10,320 Speaker 2: I don't think there's a right or wrong. I think 126 00:05:10,320 --> 00:05:11,719 Speaker 2: that's the wrong words to be using. 127 00:05:11,800 --> 00:05:13,440 Speaker 3: I want to ask you a question before you even 128 00:05:13,440 --> 00:05:15,960 Speaker 3: finish your answer. When you're playing games with the kids, 129 00:05:16,480 --> 00:05:18,080 Speaker 3: do you try to beat them, like if we're playing 130 00:05:18,120 --> 00:05:20,440 Speaker 3: Cover your Assets or I'm just. 131 00:05:20,400 --> 00:05:23,760 Speaker 2: Playing the game. I don't have the same competitive nature 132 00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:27,600 Speaker 2: as you guys do. I often win, right, But I 133 00:05:28,400 --> 00:05:30,560 Speaker 2: think it's in the way we do it. So I 134 00:05:31,160 --> 00:05:33,200 Speaker 2: often won't play with you because I just feel like 135 00:05:33,240 --> 00:05:34,480 Speaker 2: you're rubbing it in my face. 136 00:05:34,760 --> 00:05:40,480 Speaker 3: Well when I say die your face, that's just how 137 00:05:40,520 --> 00:05:41,200 Speaker 3: you play the game. 138 00:05:43,279 --> 00:05:46,560 Speaker 2: So for me, who's a little bit more sensitive in nature, 139 00:05:47,000 --> 00:05:51,239 Speaker 2: I struggle with that tactic. I don't have a problem 140 00:05:51,440 --> 00:05:54,520 Speaker 2: with us playing like for real, and I think that 141 00:05:55,160 --> 00:05:58,000 Speaker 2: what I noticed with you as you were playing checkers 142 00:05:58,000 --> 00:06:01,160 Speaker 2: with Emily, was you were verbalized everything you were doing 143 00:06:01,240 --> 00:06:04,839 Speaker 2: so she could learn alongside with you. Yeah, you don't 144 00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:08,640 Speaker 2: learn by just reading the manual or reading the rules. 145 00:06:08,760 --> 00:06:12,880 Speaker 2: You actually learn as you process things. And so I 146 00:06:13,320 --> 00:06:16,279 Speaker 2: was really impressed because you obviously have acknowledged that she 147 00:06:16,320 --> 00:06:20,039 Speaker 2: was a little bit upset about not winning, but she 148 00:06:20,200 --> 00:06:22,560 Speaker 2: was also taking in everything you were saying, and it 149 00:06:22,600 --> 00:06:24,320 Speaker 2: improved her game as she went. 150 00:06:24,640 --> 00:06:26,840 Speaker 3: Even with chess, she'd go to move something, I'd say, 151 00:06:26,960 --> 00:06:29,279 Speaker 3: if you do that, just be mindful. There's going to 152 00:06:29,279 --> 00:06:31,000 Speaker 3: be consequences. I wonder if you can see what the 153 00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:35,120 Speaker 3: consequences are or Like, I'm really verbal and definitely focused 154 00:06:35,120 --> 00:06:37,120 Speaker 3: on teaching, but sometimes I think, just just play the 155 00:06:37,160 --> 00:06:39,200 Speaker 3: game and have fun as well. Anyway, that's my older 156 00:06:39,240 --> 00:06:41,599 Speaker 3: better tomorrow, I bought games decimating the kids. I don't 157 00:06:41,600 --> 00:06:42,800 Speaker 3: know if it's right or wrong, but I'm having a 158 00:06:42,839 --> 00:06:43,440 Speaker 3: lot of fun with it. 159 00:06:43,560 --> 00:06:45,760 Speaker 2: And that's the only way you play. 160 00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:46,920 Speaker 1: That's the only way I play. 161 00:06:47,080 --> 00:06:52,640 Speaker 3: Play hard or go home. Yeah, yeah, so what's your 162 00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:53,400 Speaker 3: odd abut tomorrow? 163 00:06:53,440 --> 00:06:57,440 Speaker 2: This week, I had a really beautiful experience. Earlier in 164 00:06:57,480 --> 00:06:59,640 Speaker 2: the week, a friend of mine came over for a 165 00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:02,360 Speaker 2: visit to check in on me and see how we're 166 00:07:02,360 --> 00:07:05,560 Speaker 2: all going. And we went and spent some time on 167 00:07:05,600 --> 00:07:07,480 Speaker 2: the beach and we're able to just kind of talk 168 00:07:07,520 --> 00:07:10,520 Speaker 2: about the events of the last few weeks and you know, 169 00:07:10,600 --> 00:07:12,800 Speaker 2: kind of just do a bit of a debrief. And 170 00:07:12,960 --> 00:07:15,920 Speaker 2: she shared some really really beautiful things with me in 171 00:07:15,960 --> 00:07:18,400 Speaker 2: relation to your post about Logan's passing. 172 00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:20,840 Speaker 3: So just some background for those who missed it on Facebook, 173 00:07:20,880 --> 00:07:23,600 Speaker 3: I shared something about my nephew dying. We talked a 174 00:07:23,640 --> 00:07:26,840 Speaker 3: bit about suicide in that post, and it ended up 175 00:07:27,480 --> 00:07:29,160 Speaker 3: not that I did it. I mean, in some ways 176 00:07:29,160 --> 00:07:30,920 Speaker 3: I did it for each, because we want to help people, 177 00:07:31,520 --> 00:07:33,040 Speaker 3: but I did it for each in a way that 178 00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:35,200 Speaker 3: I don't normally write it. So normally everything we put 179 00:07:35,240 --> 00:07:37,600 Speaker 3: on social media is about reaching lots of people for 180 00:07:38,440 --> 00:07:40,840 Speaker 3: I don't know, for happy families reasons, whereas this one 181 00:07:40,880 --> 00:07:43,840 Speaker 3: was different. This was let's reach people because this subject 182 00:07:44,440 --> 00:07:46,080 Speaker 3: matters like it was a totally different thing, and we 183 00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:49,600 Speaker 3: reached like three million people, So she was obviously one 184 00:07:49,600 --> 00:07:50,480 Speaker 3: of the people that were reached. 185 00:07:50,760 --> 00:07:53,760 Speaker 2: Well, she doesn't even have social media, so she got 186 00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:55,960 Speaker 2: a phone call from a friend who said, I'm not 187 00:07:55,960 --> 00:07:58,920 Speaker 2: sure if you're aware, but this has just happened. And 188 00:07:59,280 --> 00:08:01,600 Speaker 2: she was able to reach the post via her friend 189 00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:06,760 Speaker 2: and it had such a profound impact on her that 190 00:08:06,800 --> 00:08:10,960 Speaker 2: she literally walked into her son's room she's been really, 191 00:08:10,960 --> 00:08:16,800 Speaker 2: really struggling with lately. He is sixteen, right in the 192 00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:22,200 Speaker 2: middle of that tricky stage of teenage years, and she 193 00:08:22,400 --> 00:08:25,160 Speaker 2: just grabbed him to a big bear hug and he 194 00:08:25,240 --> 00:08:26,880 Speaker 2: kind of was like she just said, he was like 195 00:08:26,960 --> 00:08:29,720 Speaker 2: a surfboard. He was just completely stiff and was like, 196 00:08:29,880 --> 00:08:33,000 Speaker 2: what is going on? He was like all right, Mum, okay, mum, 197 00:08:33,480 --> 00:08:38,280 Speaker 2: all right, okay, and she just couldn't let go, and 198 00:08:38,360 --> 00:08:40,800 Speaker 2: so she finally did let go and they were able 199 00:08:40,800 --> 00:08:42,520 Speaker 2: to sit down and have a conversation and she actually 200 00:08:42,559 --> 00:08:44,800 Speaker 2: shared with him the post. He got to read it 201 00:08:44,960 --> 00:08:49,040 Speaker 2: and he was visibly shaken by the things that he read, 202 00:08:50,160 --> 00:08:52,640 Speaker 2: and he looked at her and he said, are you 203 00:08:52,720 --> 00:08:58,680 Speaker 2: worried about me? And he's a kid who's been struggling 204 00:08:58,679 --> 00:09:02,960 Speaker 2: with his own mental illness challenges and they were able 205 00:09:03,040 --> 00:09:05,920 Speaker 2: to have had, for the very first time, have an open 206 00:09:06,320 --> 00:09:11,160 Speaker 2: dialogue around what that looks like. And as she sat there, 207 00:09:11,360 --> 00:09:15,960 Speaker 2: it was probably for her the first time that she 208 00:09:16,760 --> 00:09:21,000 Speaker 2: was able to take his perspective, and she talked about 209 00:09:21,040 --> 00:09:23,280 Speaker 2: all of the little things that had driven her crazy, 210 00:09:23,440 --> 00:09:26,440 Speaker 2: like the twelve coffee mugs that are sitting on his 211 00:09:26,480 --> 00:09:29,000 Speaker 2: bedside table because he takes a drink into his room 212 00:09:29,040 --> 00:09:29,880 Speaker 2: and doesn't bring it out. 213 00:09:29,960 --> 00:09:31,240 Speaker 3: As soon as you say that, I think of what 214 00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:34,280 Speaker 3: I shared last week from my sister and her funeral 215 00:09:34,320 --> 00:09:38,000 Speaker 3: speech about Logan and how she would deal with that 216 00:09:38,040 --> 00:09:39,280 Speaker 3: every day for the rest of her life if she 217 00:09:39,280 --> 00:09:40,600 Speaker 3: could have her boy with that again. 218 00:09:41,200 --> 00:09:42,680 Speaker 2: Yeah, And so I was able to share that with 219 00:09:42,720 --> 00:09:44,760 Speaker 2: her as well, and we kind of had a conversation 220 00:09:44,840 --> 00:09:46,640 Speaker 2: and she just said, as she read that post, she 221 00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:49,160 Speaker 2: sat there and thought, how would I feel if that 222 00:09:49,280 --> 00:09:53,360 Speaker 2: was me in your sister's place? And she knew that 223 00:09:53,480 --> 00:09:56,880 Speaker 2: no matter what was going on, that she couldn't think 224 00:09:57,000 --> 00:10:01,199 Speaker 2: of life without her son. And just as a result 225 00:10:01,280 --> 00:10:05,080 Speaker 2: of that reframing, she was able to sit in that 226 00:10:05,160 --> 00:10:09,480 Speaker 2: place and look at life from her son's perspective and 227 00:10:09,600 --> 00:10:12,959 Speaker 2: recognize that for him, all he sees is his mum 228 00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:16,600 Speaker 2: who's constantly nagging him, you know, constantly at him because 229 00:10:16,600 --> 00:10:20,520 Speaker 2: he's not doing things. They had a conversation a few 230 00:10:20,520 --> 00:10:24,320 Speaker 2: weeks earlier and it had got really really intense, and 231 00:10:24,360 --> 00:10:27,760 Speaker 2: he just said, you're so perfect. You think you're so perfect, 232 00:10:28,120 --> 00:10:31,199 Speaker 2: and I can't win, Like there's nothing that I can 233 00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:34,760 Speaker 2: do to kind of match where you are in life. 234 00:10:35,400 --> 00:10:38,760 Speaker 2: And she kind of remembered that and just sat there 235 00:10:38,840 --> 00:10:43,680 Speaker 2: and verbalized with him again for the first time, verbalized 236 00:10:43,840 --> 00:10:48,440 Speaker 2: what she perceived was his perception of her as a 237 00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:51,000 Speaker 2: result of her actions. And at the end of the 238 00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:52,760 Speaker 2: conversation he looked at her and he was a little 239 00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:58,320 Speaker 2: bit bewildered and he just said, thanks, thanks, mom for 240 00:10:58,360 --> 00:11:04,319 Speaker 2: seeing see life from my perspective, Like she got it, 241 00:11:04,440 --> 00:11:07,560 Speaker 2: and he realized that she got it for the first time. 242 00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:12,280 Speaker 2: And she just said that one post has literally transformed 243 00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:18,120 Speaker 2: her home in that one moment, that recognition that as 244 00:11:18,160 --> 00:11:20,679 Speaker 2: a parent, if we can sit in a place of 245 00:11:20,720 --> 00:11:25,520 Speaker 2: compassion for our children instead of that place that so 246 00:11:25,720 --> 00:11:28,760 Speaker 2: often takes over because we're just so frustrated our kids, 247 00:11:28,800 --> 00:11:32,000 Speaker 2: Like if we talk about it from raw truth, they 248 00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:36,200 Speaker 2: can be so inconvenient to our peace and pleasure in life. 249 00:11:36,320 --> 00:11:39,840 Speaker 2: They get in the way, they're messy, they're noisy, and 250 00:11:39,920 --> 00:11:41,960 Speaker 2: all of the other things, and we get so focused 251 00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:43,959 Speaker 2: on that. But if we can sit in that place 252 00:11:44,000 --> 00:11:47,120 Speaker 2: of compassion and actually see life from them. I think 253 00:11:47,120 --> 00:11:50,200 Speaker 2: about all of the struggles that we are experiencing as 254 00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:53,719 Speaker 2: adults and how hard it is for us to navigate that, 255 00:11:54,080 --> 00:11:59,400 Speaker 2: and we've had life experience and years of knowledge accumulating 256 00:11:59,559 --> 00:12:02,400 Speaker 2: to work through that. Our kids don't have that yet, 257 00:12:02,679 --> 00:12:06,359 Speaker 2: and yet we're asking them to deal with life gracefully 258 00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:08,640 Speaker 2: in spite of the fact that we're still struggling. 259 00:12:09,160 --> 00:12:11,120 Speaker 3: We've got to help our our plates on, let alone them. 260 00:12:11,720 --> 00:12:13,720 Speaker 3: This is the best story that you could have shared 261 00:12:13,760 --> 00:12:15,440 Speaker 3: with This is why I wrote the post, because I 262 00:12:15,480 --> 00:12:18,960 Speaker 3: wanted to help families to connect, and you're sharing that. 263 00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:23,040 Speaker 3: It's just beautiful. When I wrote misconnection while your teenage 264 00:12:23,080 --> 00:12:25,520 Speaker 3: daughter hates you expects the world needs to talk. I 265 00:12:25,559 --> 00:12:28,560 Speaker 3: asked the girls what they most wanted from their parents. 266 00:12:28,760 --> 00:12:30,880 Speaker 3: That was one of the questions that I asked, and 267 00:12:31,280 --> 00:12:34,040 Speaker 3: the overwhelming response was just one word, listen. 268 00:12:34,400 --> 00:12:35,360 Speaker 1: It's something to listen. 269 00:12:35,760 --> 00:12:38,080 Speaker 3: And when I hear the story that you've just shared, 270 00:12:38,559 --> 00:12:40,800 Speaker 3: so much better than my wiping the board with a 271 00:12:40,800 --> 00:12:44,360 Speaker 3: monopoly plate kind of thing. Such a good story. When 272 00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:45,640 Speaker 3: I hear you share that, I just think this is 273 00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:47,840 Speaker 3: what the podcast is for. This what happy Family's website 274 00:12:47,880 --> 00:12:49,760 Speaker 3: is for this what the book's are for. It's to 275 00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:54,080 Speaker 3: bring families together and to help kids and parents communicate 276 00:12:54,120 --> 00:12:57,360 Speaker 3: in ways that are helpful rather than hurtful because we 277 00:12:57,600 --> 00:13:00,720 Speaker 3: just get it wrong so much. I'm so glad you 278 00:13:00,720 --> 00:13:04,200 Speaker 3: shared that. We really hope that this older Better Tomorrow 279 00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:06,760 Speaker 3: has inspired you to have a better weekend and a 280 00:13:06,800 --> 00:13:10,560 Speaker 3: great week with your family. As we get closer to Christmas, 281 00:13:10,600 --> 00:13:13,320 Speaker 3: we hope that you get to do better tomorrow. The 282 00:13:13,320 --> 00:13:16,160 Speaker 3: Happy Family's podcast is produced by Justin Rowland for Bridge Media. 283 00:13:16,200 --> 00:13:17,960 Speaker 1: Craig Bruce is our executive producer. 284 00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:20,559 Speaker 3: If you'd like more and fo about making your family happier, 285 00:13:20,640 --> 00:13:22,880 Speaker 3: please visit us at Happy Families dot com dot au 286 00:13:23,040 --> 00:13:26,360 Speaker 3: and become a member today. Our brand new membership kicks 287 00:13:26,360 --> 00:13:28,880 Speaker 3: off next year and it is going to be all 288 00:13:28,880 --> 00:13:32,640 Speaker 3: about your family quest for happiness. We think that you 289 00:13:32,720 --> 00:13:37,400 Speaker 3: will be blown away with the resources, the support, and 290 00:13:37,440 --> 00:13:39,440 Speaker 3: the way that we can help. Thanks for listening, Have 291 00:13:39,480 --> 00:13:40,520 Speaker 3: a great weekend.