WEBVTT - Episode 5: Maybe I’m a Chronic Oversharer 0:00:01.120 --> 0:00:05.080 I'm Patrina Jones, and this episode Maybe I'm a Chronic 0:00:05.120 --> 0:00:08.520 OVI Sharer really cuts to the core of the sometimes 0:00:08.560 --> 0:00:12.319 awkward symptoms of menopause for some women. I promised you 0:00:12.360 --> 0:00:16.079 a frank, no holds barred series, and this is exactly 0:00:16.239 --> 0:00:20.720 what my catch up with Sarah Patterson is, completely unfiltered. 0:00:21.120 --> 0:00:24.360 We've been made since we're teenagers working in regional radio 0:00:24.400 --> 0:00:27.560 together as cadets, and have shared all of life's ups 0:00:27.600 --> 0:00:30.400 and downs and have been a constant support to one another, 0:00:30.920 --> 0:00:33.640 none more so than right now as we tackle head 0:00:33.640 --> 0:00:37.000 on our menopause journeys. So pull up a chair and 0:00:37.080 --> 0:00:40.680 let me introduce you to one of my BFFs, Sarah Patterson. 0:00:42.760 --> 0:00:46.360 I'd like to welcome to this episode a very well 0:00:46.400 --> 0:00:51.720 renowned radio journalist thirty plus years experience, Sarah Patterson Radio Today, 0:00:51.760 --> 0:00:56.960 a reporter, former TV reporter, news director, podcaster. 0:00:57.320 --> 0:01:00.600 If you might have caught her podcast Food. 0:01:00.320 --> 0:01:05.040 Bites and a woman taking on and winning hopefully at menopause. 0:01:05.360 --> 0:01:08.280 How are you very well, Patrina, Thank you so much 0:01:08.319 --> 0:01:11.640 for having me on. We have been dear friends for 0:01:11.720 --> 0:01:13.200 a very long time, so. 0:01:13.240 --> 0:01:15.080 Much so that we call each other by our pet 0:01:15.160 --> 0:01:17.000 nicknames Ethel and Beryl. That's right. 0:01:17.600 --> 0:01:20.880 And I have known Beryl now since I was I 0:01:20.920 --> 0:01:22.399 reckon seventeen or eighteen. 0:01:22.600 --> 0:01:25.479 Yeah, I still remember the day I met you out 0:01:25.520 --> 0:01:27.760 the front of three and eight in Wangaratta. You had 0:01:27.760 --> 0:01:30.040 a floral dress on and Doc Martins AND's you know, 0:01:30.280 --> 0:01:33.399 white ankle socks and you had corkscrew curls. 0:01:33.640 --> 0:01:38.160 Oh yeah, No, that's traumatic that you bring that up yet. No, 0:01:38.240 --> 0:01:41.440 we've known each other a long time and quite most 0:01:41.480 --> 0:01:45.119 days we do chat absolute days, and it's usually centered 0:01:45.160 --> 0:01:49.440 around menopause. And I thought we need to bring this 0:01:49.560 --> 0:01:53.320 to the podcast because you helped me so much cope 0:01:53.320 --> 0:01:54.840 with what I'm going through. 0:01:54.720 --> 0:01:58.040 As you deal with me. And it is. It's a 0:01:58.040 --> 0:02:00.720 bit of a head fuck at absolutely is. There's no 0:02:00.800 --> 0:02:03.920 other description for it is there. And I think the 0:02:03.960 --> 0:02:07.520 thing I feel most is ripped off that I didn't 0:02:07.560 --> 0:02:09.720 know that this is what it was going to be like. 0:02:09.840 --> 0:02:12.560 I think so many of us hear about the warnings, 0:02:12.600 --> 0:02:15.200 oh you'll have a few hot flushes, but otherwise, you know, 0:02:15.600 --> 0:02:18.200 my mother would say it's the change of life. I 0:02:18.240 --> 0:02:20.600 hate that expression change of life because it doesn't go 0:02:20.680 --> 0:02:24.600 anywhere near to describing how shitty it is. 0:02:24.760 --> 0:02:27.320 Yeah, what are you struggling with most at the moment? 0:02:27.360 --> 0:02:29.240 Do you think or does it ebb and flow? 0:02:29.800 --> 0:02:32.760 I think well, speaking of the hot flushes, I think 0:02:32.840 --> 0:02:35.840 they are driving me nuts, especially at night, because they're 0:02:35.880 --> 0:02:39.280 impeding my ability to get a good night's sleep. And 0:02:39.280 --> 0:02:43.000 they're not just you know, feeling a bit hot. They're ferocious. 0:02:43.080 --> 0:02:46.240 I can feel it starting in my ankles in the 0:02:46.240 --> 0:02:49.680 middle of the night, and it'll slowly rise up through 0:02:49.720 --> 0:02:53.480 my chest and eventually feel like my head's about to explode, 0:02:53.480 --> 0:02:56.800 and like almost like a Boeing seven four sevens taking 0:02:56.840 --> 0:02:59.080 off from my scalp in the middle of the night 0:03:00.280 --> 0:03:02.960 when you've got your husband next to you. Who my 0:03:03.080 --> 0:03:06.200 husband is. He's quite a cold sort of person who 0:03:06.240 --> 0:03:08.400 likes to keep worn. Here I am on the other side, 0:03:08.520 --> 0:03:10.800 red hot. It's not a great combination. 0:03:11.200 --> 0:03:13.920 No, it's the sleep I reckon I had. I was 0:03:13.960 --> 0:03:17.680 telling you earlier about four hours sleep last night, no 0:03:17.760 --> 0:03:22.400 particular reason why. And when you're sitting sleeping there, laying 0:03:22.480 --> 0:03:24.320 there trying to sleep, and you know you've got to 0:03:24.320 --> 0:03:27.760 get up at three am, it just makes it worse. 0:03:27.800 --> 0:03:30.560 And then you have all these thoughts in your head. 0:03:30.639 --> 0:03:33.720 It's like you can't wind down because I think the 0:03:33.800 --> 0:03:37.160 anxiety is something I'm struggling with. It's like it all 0:03:37.200 --> 0:03:38.280 feeds off each other. 0:03:38.720 --> 0:03:41.400 I agree, I agree, I think it's all connected. 0:03:41.720 --> 0:03:44.360 It is what sort of stuff have you tried? Have 0:03:44.440 --> 0:03:48.360 you tried herbal or are you doing exercise, meditation? 0:03:48.480 --> 0:03:52.640 What's working for you. I had somebody recommend a cream 0:03:52.920 --> 0:03:57.160 to me, I think a progesterone based cream which you 0:03:57.200 --> 0:03:59.600 just put on the crook of your elbow or you 0:03:59.640 --> 0:04:01.240 can put it on your chest. This was a few 0:04:01.280 --> 0:04:04.080 months ago, and I thought, well, I'll give it a 0:04:04.120 --> 0:04:06.520 red hot go because you know it can't hurt. 0:04:06.640 --> 0:04:07.160 Why the hell? 0:04:08.000 --> 0:04:10.160 And this friend of mine ordered it, I think from 0:04:10.200 --> 0:04:12.520 the United States and sent it to me. Wasn't cheap, 0:04:13.480 --> 0:04:16.960 but she swore by it now. I tried it for 0:04:17.279 --> 0:04:19.960 no couple of weeks and then I don't know whether 0:04:20.000 --> 0:04:21.440 it was related to the cream or what, but I 0:04:21.440 --> 0:04:24.200 started to feel quite sick in the guts, and I thought, oh, 0:04:24.240 --> 0:04:27.280 this isn't a good reaction. I didn't feel like it 0:04:27.360 --> 0:04:30.080 was really helping me with the hot flushes, so I 0:04:30.680 --> 0:04:32.800 gave that up. But at the moment, and I've mentioned 0:04:32.800 --> 0:04:35.800 this to you, I've been taking what are called Tranquil 0:04:35.880 --> 0:04:38.599 night tablets. They're blackmors. I think the brand is just 0:04:38.640 --> 0:04:42.800 get them from the chemist and they look they take 0:04:42.839 --> 0:04:45.400 the edge off the hot flushes. But like you say, 0:04:45.440 --> 0:04:49.240 it's the anxiety that really messes with your head. 0:04:49.480 --> 0:04:52.320 Yeah, yeah, it's just I mean, you're like me. You've 0:04:52.560 --> 0:04:56.200 worked decades in the media, frontline media, where you've been 0:04:56.240 --> 0:04:58.240 reporting on scenes. 0:04:57.880 --> 0:04:59.320 Like you're used to. 0:05:00.200 --> 0:05:04.520 You're no stranger to adversity in the workfront, on the workfront. 0:05:05.000 --> 0:05:09.599 Yet some days just doing one thing is so overwhelming. 0:05:10.800 --> 0:05:12.960 I don't know what it is. It's just I think 0:05:13.000 --> 0:05:15.880 it's that stage of your life where you have elderly parents, 0:05:15.920 --> 0:05:18.920 you've got a teenage a teenager in the house, you've 0:05:18.920 --> 0:05:19.880 got a teenage son. 0:05:20.000 --> 0:05:20.960 It's like you try to. 0:05:20.960 --> 0:05:25.279 Spin all these plates and everything just sort of converges 0:05:25.360 --> 0:05:28.719 in one and it's really really overwhelming some days. 0:05:29.160 --> 0:05:32.000 What are the things you think that people don't understand 0:05:32.279 --> 0:05:34.040 or misunderstand? You know? 0:05:34.120 --> 0:05:37.760 What I find most debilitating is the zero to one 0:05:37.880 --> 0:05:45.719 hundred in split second sort of mental shifts where you 0:05:45.800 --> 0:05:48.720 just fly off the handle and you're very aware that 0:05:48.760 --> 0:05:52.680 you're doing it, and then the extreme guilt you feel. 0:05:53.200 --> 0:05:55.320 This is when you're home and your snap at your 0:05:55.320 --> 0:05:59.479 partner or your child, and it's the guilt that you 0:05:59.600 --> 0:06:02.240 just are you for days after and you know it's 0:06:02.400 --> 0:06:06.520 like totally out of proportion. But how do you I 0:06:06.560 --> 0:06:09.680 guess it feels like it came from a different person. Absolutely, 0:06:09.839 --> 0:06:12.200 you feel like you standing in the room looking at 0:06:12.200 --> 0:06:16.479 yourself doing it and it is just completely and you 0:06:16.600 --> 0:06:20.680 know after it how unreasonable it was, and it could 0:06:20.680 --> 0:06:23.680 be over the smallest, slightest thing, yep. 0:06:23.760 --> 0:06:27.920 And then then you feel like the stereotypical menopausal woman saying, oh, 0:06:27.960 --> 0:06:29.680 you know, I really fit the bill here. I am 0:06:29.880 --> 0:06:33.520 screaming like a banshee for no apparent reason. 0:06:33.360 --> 0:06:35.600 Just snap. But you know what, I think we need 0:06:35.640 --> 0:06:38.320 to be kinder on ourselves because we're the ones going 0:06:39.000 --> 0:06:41.480 through it, and of course obviously those in the household 0:06:41.520 --> 0:06:44.640 as well, because they're living through it with us. But 0:06:44.720 --> 0:06:47.880 I think we're so harsh on ourselves as women and 0:06:47.960 --> 0:06:50.719 so judgy, and we need to just take a step 0:06:50.760 --> 0:06:55.080 back and think about what you're doing. You've got a career, 0:06:55.200 --> 0:06:58.839 you're a mum, you're going through this massive hormonal shift 0:06:58.880 --> 0:07:03.480 in your life. Don't be so sort of judgmental of 0:07:03.520 --> 0:07:05.680 how you're coping. Some days are better than others, and 0:07:06.320 --> 0:07:08.520 other days are shit, aren't. 0:07:08.279 --> 0:07:11.040 They really well? And the proportion of shit days tends 0:07:11.080 --> 0:07:14.360 to outweigh the proportion of good ones. When you have 0:07:14.400 --> 0:07:17.640 a good days, it's really good. But then it literally 0:07:17.680 --> 0:07:20.240 comes up and bites you on the ass, and sometimes 0:07:20.240 --> 0:07:24.400 in ways you don't expect, in really unsavory sort of ways. 0:07:24.440 --> 0:07:27.640 I mean, we've talked about the anxiety, and I've always 0:07:27.720 --> 0:07:30.800 had a tendency towards anxiety. I just thought, as you 0:07:30.920 --> 0:07:34.120 got older, anxiety eases off and you start you know, 0:07:34.200 --> 0:07:36.200 you get older, and you know, you just relax, you 0:07:36.240 --> 0:07:39.000 know how, you retire and you wander off into the sunset. 0:07:39.480 --> 0:07:41.160 For me, it doesn't work like that. For me, the 0:07:41.200 --> 0:07:44.600 anxiety gets worse, and I feel like menopause and all 0:07:44.640 --> 0:07:50.320 this hormonal shit flying around is exacerbating my anxiety absolutely, 0:07:51.000 --> 0:07:54.120 you know, to the point where, look, and this is 0:07:54.280 --> 0:07:59.040 this isn't a nice topic to discuss, But I was 0:07:59.080 --> 0:08:03.760 doing breakfast radio like you, and getting in the car 0:08:03.760 --> 0:08:05.920 at three o'clock in the morning to drive into work. 0:08:05.960 --> 0:08:11.680 And after I started perry menopause, I started to get 0:08:11.680 --> 0:08:16.040 this anxiety that I wouldn't make it to work without 0:08:17.040 --> 0:08:20.680 having an accident with my bows. So I would I 0:08:20.720 --> 0:08:24.240 would pack, I would pack tissues, I would pack wipes, 0:08:24.240 --> 0:08:27.160 I would pack plastic bags, towels in the car. And 0:08:27.400 --> 0:08:31.160 I think it's almost perpetuated in my head, you know 0:08:31.360 --> 0:08:34.520 that this was going to happen, that I would be 0:08:34.559 --> 0:08:39.679 seized by this overcopwhelming urge to ship myself basically in 0:08:39.679 --> 0:08:40.800 the car stop anywhere. 0:08:40.960 --> 0:08:43.520 I've had that too, though, like I actually have a 0:08:43.559 --> 0:08:47.760 couple of times. And when it happened the first time, 0:08:48.120 --> 0:08:49.480 luckily both times I've been home. 0:08:49.520 --> 0:08:49.880 But when it. 0:08:49.840 --> 0:08:51.959 Happened the first time, you know what it is. It 0:08:52.920 --> 0:08:55.800 wasn't so much sudden the first time. It was more, Okay, 0:08:55.840 --> 0:08:57.319 I do need to go to the bathroom, but I'll 0:08:57.360 --> 0:08:59.720 just hang out a load of washing because I've got time. Yeah, 0:09:00.040 --> 0:09:02.720 and your body says, actually, no, you don't. You can't 0:09:02.720 --> 0:09:04.360 actually put me off, or no, you can't go and 0:09:04.400 --> 0:09:05.680 collect the mail or put the bin out. 0:09:05.679 --> 0:09:09.240 You actually you need to go to the bathroom. Yes, now, yes. 0:09:09.440 --> 0:09:12.200 And I thought that's really weird because when I had 0:09:12.440 --> 0:09:13.400 who won't wait for you? 0:09:13.520 --> 0:09:13.800 That's it? 0:09:14.000 --> 0:09:17.199 When my daughter I didn't have a vaginal birth a 0:09:17.360 --> 0:09:22.080 cesarean section, and I thought, stupidly, I thought, well, nothing's 0:09:22.120 --> 0:09:26.040 really nothing has been too bent out of shape down there, 0:09:26.160 --> 0:09:27.480 so why. 0:09:27.200 --> 0:09:29.480 Why are my bows? 0:09:29.520 --> 0:09:29.600 Like? 0:09:29.640 --> 0:09:32.439 What's going on? But I think it's more common than 0:09:32.440 --> 0:09:36.520 perhaps than we think, and if everyone was honest, it 0:09:36.600 --> 0:09:38.000 happens to a lot of women. 0:09:38.280 --> 0:09:40.280 Yeah, I'd like to know that it happens to a 0:09:40.360 --> 0:09:42.640 lot of other women. So that just makes you, it 0:09:42.640 --> 0:09:45.240 doesn't well, it makes you a prisoner of yourself. It 0:09:45.280 --> 0:09:49.720 makes you withdraw from work, from society, and you know, 0:09:50.320 --> 0:09:53.000 makes you fearful of even just going out and doing 0:09:53.120 --> 0:09:54.959 social things that people take for granted. 0:09:54.960 --> 0:09:57.280 Do you find that with bladder control as well? 0:09:57.480 --> 0:10:00.360 Very much? So. I always like to plot my if 0:10:00.360 --> 0:10:03.120 I'm going out anywhere, I like to know where the 0:10:03.160 --> 0:10:06.480 nearest toilet is. And I'm one of those people who 0:10:06.520 --> 0:10:08.640 goes to the toilet just in case. 0:10:08.440 --> 0:10:11.400 Before I ye, empty the tank, Yeah, empty the tank. 0:10:11.720 --> 0:10:13.960 There's a lot they can do for that now, Like 0:10:14.000 --> 0:10:17.240 I know, my physio has done a special course that 0:10:17.760 --> 0:10:19.880 helps with pelvic flows, so I haven't. 0:10:19.960 --> 0:10:23.599 I haven't done it yet. Apparently you can do it 0:10:23.640 --> 0:10:24.800 at the traffic lights. 0:10:24.880 --> 0:10:28.480 Apparently, But you know what, my kindecologist who's been practicing 0:10:28.480 --> 0:10:31.800 in Melbourne. Lionel Steinberg a vaginal line, they call it. 0:10:31.800 --> 0:10:34.000 He's wonderful. His name just demands that. 0:10:34.480 --> 0:10:35.320 He's just amazing. 0:10:35.760 --> 0:10:38.920 He said once that you should actually be doing it 0:10:38.960 --> 0:10:41.040 from the age of light twelve or thirteen. 0:10:41.360 --> 0:10:41.920 Wow. 0:10:42.160 --> 0:10:45.360 So I've said to my daughter, this is what you need. 0:10:45.480 --> 0:10:48.600 She looked at me weird, like, yeah, right, whatever, And 0:10:48.679 --> 0:10:50.640 I think, no, you'll thank me when you're on because 0:10:50.640 --> 0:10:53.080 I honestly I don't do it. 0:10:53.160 --> 0:10:55.360 Yeah, and I may. I don't do it. I try to, 0:10:55.400 --> 0:10:57.000 and then then I figure and then you forget. You 0:10:57.080 --> 0:10:59.200 might do it one day, yeah, and then it's like, 0:10:59.240 --> 0:11:02.040 oh damn, it's been like a week since. Oh well whatever. Now, 0:11:02.559 --> 0:11:07.240 how do you go with overall dryness, not just your skin, 0:11:07.360 --> 0:11:08.360 your hair, your eyes? 0:11:08.440 --> 0:11:11.600 Do you do you just feel dry down there? I 0:11:11.640 --> 0:11:15.600 haven't got that yet. I haven't got that yet. But 0:11:15.760 --> 0:11:20.040 skin prickly and itchy and ears the other thing. For me, 0:11:20.080 --> 0:11:24.920 I've got dermatitis in my ears, which is probably related 0:11:25.000 --> 0:11:31.000 to menopause and drives me batty. The itch like ants 0:11:31.040 --> 0:11:32.760 crawling over your skin. 0:11:33.400 --> 0:11:34.360 Yeah. 0:11:34.960 --> 0:11:37.720 Hair is the other thing. Not so much skin, probably 0:11:37.760 --> 0:11:41.760 as hair. It's just manky initially, probably when I was 0:11:42.080 --> 0:11:45.280 at the start of perimenopause, maybe I don't know, eighty 0:11:45.320 --> 0:11:50.680 months two years ago. It just wouldn't sit right, and 0:11:50.720 --> 0:11:52.240 I'd think it was the hair dress or all the 0:11:52.240 --> 0:11:54.959 products I'm using, so I change the products and think, 0:11:55.400 --> 0:11:58.360 oh this, or you know, said nah, it was like 0:11:58.559 --> 0:12:02.400 no amount of fuss over it would fix it. And 0:12:02.480 --> 0:12:05.200 it gets greasy, very like it's just not my hair. 0:12:05.400 --> 0:12:09.080 Yeah. Mine feels like it's gone back to being baby hair, 0:12:09.160 --> 0:12:13.360 almost almost baby fine, with no life or body yes 0:12:13.440 --> 0:12:15.320 in it, limp, very limp. 0:12:15.400 --> 0:12:15.679 Yeah. 0:12:16.000 --> 0:12:19.960 I had Imagen crump on and she was saying she's 0:12:20.000 --> 0:12:22.800 had straight hair her entire life, and her hair has 0:12:22.840 --> 0:12:27.559 gone curly, curly, like she's had a perm Yeah, like insane. 0:12:27.640 --> 0:12:29.840 These are all the things we don't hear about. It's 0:12:29.880 --> 0:12:32.079 so far beyond the old hot flushes, isn't it. 0:12:32.120 --> 0:12:34.160 But don't you think that's the frustrating thing of it 0:12:34.240 --> 0:12:38.760 that it's just so random? There are so honestly, dozens 0:12:38.800 --> 0:12:40.400 and dozens and dozens of symptoms. 0:12:40.400 --> 0:12:41.199 Doesn't mean you'll get them. 0:12:41.160 --> 0:12:44.960 All naturally, but just weird stuff. Speaking of image, and 0:12:45.040 --> 0:12:47.680 I did want to get your opinion on this. 0:12:47.880 --> 0:12:48.920 Now you haven't heard. 0:12:48.720 --> 0:12:53.120 This audio before she was speaking on the OBC. I 0:12:53.200 --> 0:12:57.520 think she has helped change the narrative of menopause and 0:12:57.679 --> 0:12:59.680 makes kind of helped normalize it. 0:13:00.120 --> 0:13:00.680 You the audio. 0:13:01.000 --> 0:13:03.320 Let's move on to the Australian. It has the latest 0:13:03.320 --> 0:13:05.000 time the Prime Minister to visit the China. 0:13:05.480 --> 0:13:10.160 Yes and not a pardon Michael, big chill. But the 0:13:10.200 --> 0:13:15.679 PM doesn't pander yet. So the bilateral meeting between Australia 0:13:15.720 --> 0:13:22.199 and China, Anthony Albert easy and Chinese. I'm so sorry 0:13:22.360 --> 0:13:25.120 I could keep stumbling through this, but I am having 0:13:25.240 --> 0:13:28.600 such a perimoral perimenopausal right. 0:13:28.480 --> 0:13:31.800 Now live on air. It's so soften. 0:13:32.360 --> 0:13:34.640 The point about this is that we need to make 0:13:34.679 --> 0:13:38.160 it normal. You have these kinds of conversations, and I 0:13:38.280 --> 0:13:42.400 love you for even saying it, because we interview people, 0:13:42.520 --> 0:13:46.559 We talk to people about this and this is the reality. 0:13:46.760 --> 0:13:49.600 I don't think all bones respect to national television. 0:13:50.120 --> 0:13:51.360 It's the furthest of the sun. 0:13:51.800 --> 0:13:55.560 Sorry, listen, we'll let you take take a breathe, thank you, 0:13:57.040 --> 0:13:59.560 thank you for being honest about it. We can and 0:14:00.760 --> 0:14:04.400 while Imagen takes in some deep press, listen, we want 0:14:04.440 --> 0:14:04.800 to throw. 0:14:04.840 --> 0:14:05.679 What do you think about that? 0:14:06.040 --> 0:14:07.800 Oh my god, I just want to cry for her 0:14:07.840 --> 0:14:10.440 because that I can. I think we've all been we've 0:14:10.520 --> 0:14:13.560 all been there, and she was just so refreshingly honest 0:14:13.600 --> 0:14:17.800 about it, just the whole menopause fog and menopause brain 0:14:18.000 --> 0:14:22.560 under And I found it interesting that one of the 0:14:22.560 --> 0:14:25.200 interviewers was saying, yes, we need to we need to 0:14:25.200 --> 0:14:26.680 talk more about this, we need to get it out 0:14:26.680 --> 0:14:29.320 in the open. It's it's menopause fog brain, whereas the 0:14:29.400 --> 0:14:34.080 gentleman interviewer basically said, well, we'll let imagen just collect us, 0:14:34.200 --> 0:14:37.760 collect herself and but no image. And you are a 0:14:37.880 --> 0:14:42.440 champion just for being honest enough to make us all 0:14:42.600 --> 0:14:45.320 feel you know how it would to me feel. I 0:14:45.320 --> 0:14:49.280 actually wanted to scream it from the rooftop. So I thought, Wow, 0:14:49.720 --> 0:14:52.880 you've just done such an amazing service to your sisterhood. 0:14:52.880 --> 0:14:57.480 But also it made me want to do better with 0:14:57.600 --> 0:15:01.400 the whole conversation around menopause, because there's been so many 0:15:01.440 --> 0:15:03.680 times I've talked to you before, how I've been on 0:15:03.800 --> 0:15:07.120 air and I'll be going on a spiel and my 0:15:07.240 --> 0:15:10.840 brain fog will hit and it's like to stop, sign 0:15:10.960 --> 0:15:13.320 I look like an absolute idiot because I've got as 0:15:13.320 --> 0:15:16.600 It's like the rug is pulled out from under you. 0:15:16.600 --> 0:15:19.080 You know, it's just you can't remember names, you can't 0:15:19.160 --> 0:15:20.800 remember what you were talking about. 0:15:20.920 --> 0:15:24.000 It's horrible. It's terrible. I mean, and we you know, 0:15:24.240 --> 0:15:27.480 I reckon. We we're pretty eloquent kind of people. Sometimes 0:15:27.480 --> 0:15:30.200 we are depends how many drinks we've had alcohol. That's 0:15:30.240 --> 0:15:34.040 another subject to get onto. But you're right, it is 0:15:34.080 --> 0:15:37.000 like a huge stop sign or a handbrake gets pulled on. 0:15:37.080 --> 0:15:39.160 You think, what was I talking about? Where was I 0:15:39.200 --> 0:15:42.360 going with this? And it's embarrassing. You feel embarrassed, you 0:15:42.400 --> 0:15:45.840 feel inadequate, and you just feel like a laughing stock 0:15:46.000 --> 0:15:49.760 sometimes and you can't explain it. But Imagen has explained 0:15:49.800 --> 0:15:54.320 it perfectly. And it's menopause. It's your brain, it's your hormones. 0:15:54.360 --> 0:15:56.640 It doesn't they don't work the same way anymore. 0:15:56.720 --> 0:15:59.800 Yeah, I don't know if she realizes just how amazing 0:16:00.440 --> 0:16:02.240 that was. And I'm sorry to play it again. She'll 0:16:02.280 --> 0:16:04.440 be listening and she'll be probably hiding under a table. 0:16:04.480 --> 0:16:07.360 But I think she's done a service to so many people. 0:16:07.440 --> 0:16:08.160 She really has. 0:16:08.520 --> 0:16:11.880 There's some really interesting stats from HCF, the Health Fund 0:16:12.120 --> 0:16:15.560 on menopause. Just one in four twenty six percent of 0:16:15.600 --> 0:16:19.920 women's surveyed say they'd feel comfortable speaking about periminopause and 0:16:19.960 --> 0:16:24.440 minopause with their pharmacist or chemist, even six percent the 0:16:24.480 --> 0:16:28.280 equivalent of three hundred and ninety thousand women, So they 0:16:28.280 --> 0:16:31.880 do not feel comfortable speaking about it with anyone. Wow, 0:16:31.960 --> 0:16:33.920 that stigma is still. 0:16:33.840 --> 0:16:36.160 Why is it? Why do we still feel at it? 0:16:36.200 --> 0:16:39.240 I think it's ageism, and I think it's you know, 0:16:39.400 --> 0:16:42.680 it's that stage of life in inverted commas where you 0:16:42.720 --> 0:16:45.840 sort of feel that you can't procreate anymore, so what 0:16:45.880 --> 0:16:48.280 good are you to society? Shove you off into the 0:16:48.320 --> 0:16:51.160 top paddic And it's so ironic because I think you're 0:16:51.200 --> 0:16:55.560 at a point in your career where you're absolutely smashing it. 0:16:55.880 --> 0:16:59.040 You know, we've been working decades to perfect our craft, 0:16:59.080 --> 0:17:02.240 and we are, you know where finally, I think, finding 0:17:02.320 --> 0:17:07.720 both ourselves in our sort of within ourselves, not making 0:17:07.760 --> 0:17:12.520 apologies anymore, but also really you know, hitting six in 0:17:12.560 --> 0:17:14.080 our careers yet. 0:17:14.800 --> 0:17:15.679 And I totally forgot what. 0:17:15.680 --> 0:17:17.080 I was about to say that you go, there's a 0:17:17.119 --> 0:17:20.840 brain fop for you. But so so on one hand, 0:17:21.200 --> 0:17:24.760 you doing so successfully, but then on the other it's 0:17:24.840 --> 0:17:26.359 kind of like, well, yeah, you kind of have this 0:17:26.400 --> 0:17:28.360 feeling that you're a bit of a has been you're 0:17:28.359 --> 0:17:31.400 getting older now you're not kind of with it, you. 0:17:31.359 --> 0:17:33.560 Know, and that's where the anxiety kicks in again. And 0:17:33.600 --> 0:17:36.280 like you say, it's all interrelated. It's like this this 0:17:36.400 --> 0:17:39.520 circle and it just keeps it just keeps going on 0:17:39.560 --> 0:17:40.240 and going round. 0:17:40.600 --> 0:17:44.080 I just don't understand it. I just that's that's as 0:17:44.119 --> 0:17:46.080 you know. I want to do the podcast because I 0:17:46.119 --> 0:17:48.560 want to open the conversation and you know parts of 0:17:48.600 --> 0:17:51.760 it you talked about bells before. But that's what I 0:17:51.760 --> 0:17:53.800 want to do. It's not going to be a podcast 0:17:53.840 --> 0:17:58.120 where don't listen. If you just want to clean and tidy. 0:17:58.000 --> 0:17:58.800 It's going to get messy. 0:17:59.640 --> 0:18:02.920 That's what we have to do to make other people, 0:18:03.000 --> 0:18:06.280 other women feel supported and know that this is a community, 0:18:06.320 --> 0:18:10.159 and feel supported with what you're going through because so 0:18:10.200 --> 0:18:12.920 many other millions of women around the world are going 0:18:12.960 --> 0:18:17.840 through the same thing. There is an element of menopause 0:18:17.880 --> 0:18:21.080 that I have discovered that that's a bit of a positive, 0:18:21.240 --> 0:18:24.719 but it outweighed by a negative, and that is hair growth. 0:18:25.560 --> 0:18:29.000 You'll find that you look on your face, that you'll 0:18:29.000 --> 0:18:31.880 find that hair grows and in the strangest of places. 0:18:31.880 --> 0:18:33.920 But what I have discovered and that I am into 0:18:33.920 --> 0:18:37.520 menopause now, so I have been twelve months without a period, 0:18:37.560 --> 0:18:40.640 so I'm on the other side. But I have found 0:18:41.680 --> 0:18:45.639 amazingly I've not had to shave my legs or wax 0:18:45.680 --> 0:18:46.240 my legs. 0:18:46.400 --> 0:18:49.280 All the hair on my legs is gone. They're smooth 0:18:49.320 --> 0:18:52.359 as a baby's barm. Yeah, but I think all the 0:18:52.440 --> 0:18:55.480 hair from my legs has migrated to my chin and 0:18:56.040 --> 0:18:58.320 you're getting these. I remember when I was a little 0:18:58.440 --> 0:19:01.159 kid in a grown up in Curranborough. I was in 0:19:01.200 --> 0:19:04.879 the newsagent. I clearly remember this old woman. She was 0:19:05.200 --> 0:19:08.080 standing at the stationery area picking out a birthday card 0:19:09.119 --> 0:19:12.480 and she had a beard. She had a coarse black beard. 0:19:12.520 --> 0:19:15.000 I mean Ned Kelly would have been proud of this beard. 0:19:16.080 --> 0:19:18.160 And I remember as a little kid looking up thinking 0:19:18.680 --> 0:19:23.359 that's that's most odd, what's going on there? And until 0:19:23.400 --> 0:19:28.040 I started sprouting these coarse, coarse black hairs out of 0:19:28.080 --> 0:19:32.359 my chin, not to mention the white whiskers that start 0:19:32.720 --> 0:19:34.720 sprouting in my eyebrows. 0:19:34.440 --> 0:19:36.480 That laser will not will not fit. 0:19:36.720 --> 0:19:40.439 Yeah, I started to see, Okay, I get how this 0:19:40.480 --> 0:19:42.640 could happen. And I know you have told me off 0:19:42.640 --> 0:19:45.720 on several occasions about this. But I'm sorry I've kept doing. 0:19:45.520 --> 0:19:47.439 It because you're not still doing it. 0:19:47.600 --> 0:19:49.840 Well, I have it once or twice. I did this 0:19:49.880 --> 0:19:52.520 morning actually before I came in, Yes I did. I 0:19:52.600 --> 0:19:55.199 just shaved my chin. I know you're not. 0:19:56.000 --> 0:19:57.840 If you go and do a laser as a follower 0:19:58.119 --> 0:20:01.159 my fine with hair. It grows places where you don't 0:20:01.760 --> 0:20:04.280 want it and not in the places you do, yes 0:20:04.560 --> 0:20:08.280 want it. See, hair is not new to me because 0:20:08.320 --> 0:20:12.840 with polycystic syndrome, I always had. 0:20:13.000 --> 0:20:15.240 So that's why I got onto the laser. It's fantastic. 0:20:15.240 --> 0:20:17.919 You have been telling me for years about las. I 0:20:18.080 --> 0:20:18.840 need to do it. 0:20:19.040 --> 0:20:19.760 Ever done. 0:20:19.840 --> 0:20:23.199 But in sheer desperation this morning, I just grabbed my 0:20:23.320 --> 0:20:26.520 husband's bit grazer and I just over the chin and 0:20:26.640 --> 0:20:28.800 feels nice and feels nice and smooth. 0:20:28.840 --> 0:20:32.160 Now, why are they so black? And course, why can't 0:20:32.200 --> 0:20:35.600 they be like fair fine exactly so you're not overly dark? 0:20:35.880 --> 0:20:38.560 No, how does that work? I don't know. 0:20:38.640 --> 0:20:39.800 It's it's very unjust. 0:20:39.920 --> 0:20:42.760