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Speaker 1: Ah, another day, another bonus episode to gift our listeners.

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Speaker 2: Ash Yes, Matt's I love it and guess who we've

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Speaker 2: got on today's bonus. Let me just play your quick

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Speaker 2: little sneak peek if you don't mind.

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Speaker 3: Yay, guys, let's go.

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Speaker 1: It is Elodipulling.

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Speaker 4: What a bloody ray of sunshine she is.

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Speaker 1: She's the kind of person where you just want to

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Speaker 1: be a best mate.

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Speaker 4: Oh absolutely.

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Speaker 2: And if you're not familiar with Elidie, she's the co

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Speaker 2: host of a very popular podcast called Darling Shine, along

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Speaker 2: with Chloe Fisher, who is married to the Fisher. So

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Speaker 2: Elidie's a model, she's an author, and of course her

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Speaker 2: mum to little Minnie Alex Chump.

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Speaker 1: Minnie is a beautiful kid who looks just like her

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Speaker 1: father Chumpy. How she was conceived is something that is

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Speaker 1: very unique but extremely beautiful. Ash.

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Speaker 5: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: In the middle of twenty twenty, sadly, Chumpy died in

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Speaker 2: a tragic spearfishing accident off the coast of Palm Beach.

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Speaker 4: On that same.

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Speaker 2: Day, Elidie lost the love of her life, but her

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Speaker 2: future as a mother was saved.

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Speaker 1: Despite the immense loss, Leddy has shown incredible strength and

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Speaker 1: resilience in managing motherhood on her own, providing a loving

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Speaker 1: and nurturing environment for her daughter.

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Speaker 4: ELDI faces the same challenges that you and I do. Matt,

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Speaker 4: that's for sure.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's the dummy. Also a biting child as well.

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Speaker 6: Shall we get into it, Let's do it.

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Speaker 1: Welcome back to two doting dads and one doting mum.

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Speaker 1: I'm Mattie Jay, I'm Ash.

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Speaker 3: And I'm Eliti Pulan. Thanks for having me.

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Speaker 1: This is a podcast all about parenting. It is the good,

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Speaker 1: it is the bad and the relatable. And Ash and

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Speaker 1: I don't give any advice. Led have you got any

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Speaker 1: advice to give today? I know pressure if you do it, it.

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Speaker 4: Could be accidental.

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Speaker 5: And don't have a big night a few days before

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Speaker 5: you're going to record, because I've lost my voice and

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Speaker 5: I sound yeah.

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Speaker 4: I saw that story. I was like, was it Sunday night?

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Speaker 2: My wife goes, look you, I was coming up and

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Speaker 2: she's like she lost a voice. I'm like, oh, it's

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Speaker 2: not till wednesday. I'm sure it'll be fine. And then

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Speaker 2: I think we spoke about it Monday. And then I

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Speaker 2: saw a story and I think you were talking.

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Speaker 4: I'm like oh, we can work with that.

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Speaker 1: Your voices bounced back.

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Speaker 5: It has Actually, yeah, no, I literally couldn't speak on Monday.

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Speaker 5: But I literally forgot that we were doing this. So

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Speaker 5: you're lucky because I might have been like, hey, guys

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Speaker 5: to cancel.

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Speaker 1: Well, you gave us a message a couple of days ago,

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Speaker 1: and we thought that message was going to be the

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Speaker 1: one to say, sorry, yeah, we can't do it. We're

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Speaker 1: gonna have to postpone it.

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Speaker 3: This okay, this is how take a literate I am?

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Speaker 5: Is this the one where I was like, hey, guys,

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Speaker 5: I've just moved to a new place and I don't

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Speaker 5: have internet, So do you want me to hire a

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Speaker 5: studio or something like that?

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Speaker 3: And your beautiful.

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Speaker 5: Producer Jess was like, yeah, so we're flying up to

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Speaker 5: you and we're bringing our equipment and I was like yeah,

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Speaker 5: and I'm just telling you I don't have internet, and

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Speaker 5: she's like, we're bringing the equipment and.

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Speaker 3: I was like, and I don't have internet. She's like,

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Speaker 3: and we.

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Speaker 5: Don't need it because I'm just going to press play

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Speaker 5: and uploaded later.

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Speaker 3: And I was like, fuck you. I have my own

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Speaker 3: podcast and you think I would know this.

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Speaker 4: You're always not in charge of the Wi Fi. All

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Speaker 4: the tech is gear in your podcast.

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Speaker 3: I asked Chloe last night, I go, is that not normal?

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Speaker 5: And she goes, I always like, we always have to

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Speaker 5: have Wi Fi when we record, but we're pretty it's random.

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Speaker 3: You guys have a good setup.

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Speaker 1: Don't mind me. I'm not sure if you're going to

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Speaker 1: hear this. I'm being licked by your dog, which I'm enjoying.

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Speaker 1: That's just tasting the smashed abbot from this morning. Yeah, Elidi,

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Speaker 1: when you were a youngster, a little kid, if you will,

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Speaker 1: what were you like and were you different to how

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Speaker 1: you are now?

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Speaker 5: M I reckon, I'm actually I think I'm actually pretty

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Speaker 5: similar to now im Like I said to my mum,

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Speaker 5: I think recently, I'm like, fuck, why is Minnie so.

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Speaker 3: Annoying my kid?

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Speaker 5: Like she must have been having like she must have

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Speaker 5: been a pest that day or.

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Speaker 3: Just wasn't stopped.

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Speaker 5: I was like, mean, he's so annoying, and Mom's like, yep,

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Speaker 5: you were the exact same.

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Speaker 3: Oh my god, my dog's being annoying too right now.

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Speaker 5: Rummy, Sorry, I can hear her yapping in the background,

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Speaker 5: but yeah, mom was my arm so she can keep

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Speaker 5: keep the licking.

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Speaker 3: Going keep that pat up.

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Speaker 5: No, but mom was like she always gives me this

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Speaker 5: look like you were the exact same, And I'm like,

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Speaker 5: how annoying? Like I keep saying sorry to my mom,

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Speaker 5: I'm like, man, sorry, because she also did it alone

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Speaker 5: as well.

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Speaker 1: Well.

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Speaker 5: Her and my dad divorce when I was like one

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Speaker 5: or something and we were full time with mum. So

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Speaker 5: I'm like, shit, sorry, mum, and she had two of us.

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Speaker 3: It's not easy.

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Speaker 1: It's not until you have kids that you then look

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Speaker 1: back and you're like, I am so sorry to my parents.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, I put you through hell.

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Speaker 5: So much respect for them all of a sudden, like

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Speaker 5: I'm so much nicer to my mom these days.

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Speaker 2: And my mom says the same thing about my son.

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Speaker 2: I'm like, god, why was he shut up? And she's like, that's.

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Speaker 4: You, mate, that's what you were like when you're exactly

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Speaker 4: like that.

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Speaker 3: So yeah annoying, Oh yeah yeah yeah?

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Speaker 4: Were you the were you the class clown? Would you say?

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Speaker 5: I was like I was always yeah, I was always

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Speaker 5: getting what do we do about my dog?

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Speaker 3: Should I just hear? Come here? Come here, just sit here. Sorry?

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Speaker 3: She's like maybe she needs to be on me. Sit sorry, Okay,

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Speaker 3: I think she might chill now.

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Speaker 5: I was always the one getting sent out in class,

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Speaker 5: like I was, And funnily enough, i'd like just for

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Speaker 5: talking and just like my attentions, but I definitely have

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Speaker 5: ADHD and I just can't, you know, get And.

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Speaker 3: Then I'd get sent out of class.

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Speaker 5: And I remember a few times in primary school I'd

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Speaker 5: get sent out and I'd look to the classroom next

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Speaker 5: to me, and my brother would.

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Speaker 3: Also be sitting outside looking at it. You're like, fuck

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Speaker 3: not again.

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Speaker 1: So growing up, did you always think I want to

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Speaker 1: be a mom, I want to have a family.

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Speaker 3: Yes, I always wanted kids.

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Speaker 5: I think I thought I was probably more maternal than

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Speaker 5: what I actually am.

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Speaker 3: Like, I am such a touch person.

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Speaker 5: I love cuddles and I'm like super warm and friendly

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Speaker 5: and like fuzzy and shit. But like sometimes with Mini,

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Speaker 5: I'm like, get off me. I'm so done with being

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Speaker 5: touched sometimes. Nah, that newborn phase is everything. And yeah,

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Speaker 5: I think I grew up like around kids a lot,

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Speaker 5: And yeah, I always knew I wanted to be a mum.

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Speaker 1: I think it's a big difference so between like being

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Speaker 1: young and thinking you want to have a big family

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Speaker 1: and then you actually start having kids, and you're like,

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Speaker 1: holy shit.

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Speaker 4: Why am I so tired all the time. It's like I.

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Speaker 5: Think a lot of kids when they're like in primary

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Speaker 5: school or whatever, they always look to their teachers.

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Speaker 3: And they're like, one day, I want to be a

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Speaker 3: school teacher.

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Speaker 5: Like I definitely had that, and now I'm like, I

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Speaker 5: could not think of anything fucking worse way to do it.

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Speaker 3: I dropped Minnie off and I'm like, catch you later.

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Speaker 1: You would laugh. I know sometimes when I when I

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Speaker 1: pick up the kids from daycare, I'm like, I just

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Speaker 1: feel like I should give them a hug.

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Speaker 2: It's going to be okay. They're all real young and sprightly.

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Speaker 2: Most of the time. They're like in the early twenties.

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Speaker 2: I find then there's like the odd older one who's

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Speaker 2: just cranky.

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Speaker 4: It's just cranky. Now I get it around twenty of

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Speaker 4: them every day.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: No, people always say that the kind of cliche. You know,

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Speaker 1: when you stop trying to find someone, you know, when

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Speaker 1: you put that to the back of your mind, that's

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Speaker 1: when you'll meet the person for yourself. Were you in

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Speaker 1: a phase when you met Chumpy? Were you like I'm

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Speaker 1: looking for someone, or were you just like, no, running

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Speaker 1: your own, enjoying your life.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 5: See, I was like twenty or like just turning twenty,

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Speaker 5: and I was so young and like I always wanted kids,

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Speaker 5: but I wasn't like frothing to have them at twenty one.

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Speaker 3: I was like, yeah, five years or whatever.

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Speaker 5: So I was just so keen to just be like

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Speaker 5: in love and run around the world and.

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Speaker 3: Just like travel and have fun, and like kids was

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Speaker 3: not on my mind.

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Speaker 2: Then.

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Speaker 1: Did you want to be in a relationship when you're yeah, yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 5: I was like, I'm I love this guy, like I'll

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Speaker 5: be I want to be with him forever.

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Speaker 3: Hopefully this is the guy I'm with. Hopefully this is

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Speaker 3: the guy I do have kids with.

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Speaker 5: But I was like, we need to go spend so

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Speaker 5: many years having fun first, you know. But we did

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Speaker 5: start trying for our baby when I was like twenty six,

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Speaker 5: so we moved up to the gold Coat. We spent

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Speaker 5: like five years down in Sydney and then moved up

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Speaker 5: here when I was about twenty six. And as soon

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Speaker 5: as we bought this hot like my house up here

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Speaker 5: that I'd just sold where he started trying for a baby,

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Speaker 5: we got a dog and we were all like, yay,

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Speaker 5: this is out the next like chat date.

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Speaker 1: Who approached the conversation first of like, let's have kids. Yeah.

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Speaker 5: I think I was probably keen like a year earlier

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Speaker 5: to start trying, and he was really career focused and

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Speaker 5: he had seen like his best mate have babies while

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Speaker 5: also snowboarding, because Chump was a snowboarder who traveled the

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Speaker 5: world snowboarding and he'd seen his best mate do that,

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Speaker 5: and he was like, I just if I'm having a kid,

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Speaker 5: I want to be full time.

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Speaker 2: He was away like a lots at a time because of.

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Speaker 4: Winter and seasons.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, he was always like, if we're having kids, I

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Speaker 5: want to be one hundred percent like retire and fully

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Speaker 5: like on you and the kid and not traveling and stuff.

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Speaker 5: So yeah, we were trying up until like he was like,

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Speaker 5: we're new full pregnant, that's when I'll retire kind of thing.

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Speaker 5: So so yeah, but he was like getting to the

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Speaker 5: tail end of his career anyway, and he was ready

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Speaker 5: ready to retire.

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Speaker 3: So we were like, just yeah, having a crat.

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Speaker 2: So I just want to tell us a little bit

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Speaker 2: about where you met Chumpy and how you felt when

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Speaker 2: you first met it.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, okay, so you're Worrywood my dad lived in Worrywood.

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Speaker 5: I also grew up in Worrywood, but my mom lived

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Speaker 5: in Narraban, which is a suburb next to Oriwood. So

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Speaker 5: I would like, me and my bro would like have

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Speaker 5: dinner at mom's and we lived with our stepdad at

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Speaker 5: the time, and then we'd have dinner, and then I'd

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Speaker 5: literally go for a run at night to my dad's,

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Speaker 5: go see him, have like dessert with him or whatever,

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Speaker 5: and then run back. That's how close my families lived

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Speaker 5: like in the suburbs next to each other.

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Speaker 3: Chump, he was coming to Sydney a lot.

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Speaker 5: He's from Victoria, but he was coming to Sydney a

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Speaker 5: lot to train with that Nate that I was telling

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Speaker 5: you about before.

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Speaker 3: He's best friend from.

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Speaker 5: Snowboarding, because I grew up with Nate. He lived in

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Speaker 5: Mona Vale and like the next suburb over again. Chump

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Speaker 5: was kind of in peripher all like circles. Like we

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Speaker 5: had like a big girl group and there was a

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Speaker 5: big guy. We always just hung in the same circles.

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Speaker 5: We always knew each other. He actually always had a

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Speaker 5: girlfriend who was overseas in Bulgaria and I yeah, so

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Speaker 5: he already did long distance and.

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Speaker 1: Break up already.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, well I didn't even know howd a girlfriend actually

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Speaker 5: it was like a fan. Well, no, they were in

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Speaker 5: a serious, really nice, beautiful relationship, but she was like overseas,

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Speaker 5: so he'd always come back. We'd be like, oh, that

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Speaker 5: hot snowboarder guy's back kind of thing. But I always

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Speaker 5: had a boyfriend too, So then me and him broke up.

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Speaker 5: And then yeah, it was Laura en Ofver's twenty first birthday,

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Speaker 5: who's one of my best friends. And he came and

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Speaker 5: I was recently single, and I was like not thinking,

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Speaker 5: like I was still gutted from my last relationship ending,

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Speaker 5: and yeah he was there, and I think him and

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Speaker 5: his cheek were like finishing up. Yeah, we hooked up,

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Speaker 5: and I was just like just we would just kind

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Speaker 5: of instantly obsessed, right.

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Speaker 1: As people say opposites attract, but you guys opposite.

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Speaker 3: Or we're opposites. We are opposites for sure.

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Speaker 5: He's a very like i'd say, really smart, got his

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Speaker 5: head on his shoulders, driven kind of careery, kind of

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Speaker 5: like I on the prize, like very focused and perfectionist vibe.

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Speaker 5: And I'm really blase, like whatever goes goes, like I'm cruising.

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Speaker 5: I'm not thinking too hard. I'm not thinking too hard

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Speaker 5: about tomorrow. I think about that tomorrow morning, like you

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Speaker 5: know what I mean. It works because he definitely made

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Speaker 5: me go, okay, ship, what am I doing? Okay, I'm

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Speaker 5: gonna start UNI and don't know, I got think about

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Speaker 5: my life and what I'm doing and like.

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Speaker 3: Get my shit together a bit. And then I definitely

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Speaker 3: made him go.

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Speaker 5: Fucking alas, like have a drink and have a lot,

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Speaker 5: Like he was like always chilling and happy, but like loosener.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, like you know, and I think a lot.

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Speaker 5: Of people think typical snowbody is probably.

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Speaker 3: A bong head, probably just probably just like.

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Speaker 5: People just thought he was like yeah, just hell cruisy

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Speaker 5: and just like this athlete, just a hell grungy dude,

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Speaker 5: like a dude do.

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Speaker 3: And he's not that at all.

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Speaker 5: More intelligent, super super intelligent, like doesn't switch off super

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Speaker 5: forward thinking business.

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Speaker 4: I'd say, when.

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Speaker 1: It comes to trying for kids, apparently I don't know this,

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Speaker 1: but it does pay to adhere to a schedule, Yes,

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Speaker 1: to try it certain times of the month. Who was

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Speaker 1: leading the charge anybody? Yeah, it's all over it.

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Speaker 4: He wants to know who was ovulating.

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Speaker 3: He was definitely in check with like all right, what's

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Speaker 3: happening now? Like what day are we up to?

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Speaker 5: And shit, and like he was really excited to be

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Speaker 5: like I'm coming home.

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Speaker 3: I have in my head.

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Speaker 5: I actually don't think this is true, but I feel like.

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Speaker 3: This is just maybe.

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Speaker 5: I'm like not, I'm not someone that thinks about sex

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Speaker 5: twenty four fucking seven, I'm not.

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Speaker 3: I'm actually not like that.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I feel like guys do, like some a lot

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Speaker 5: of guys do. He'd just always be like, fuck, yeah,

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Speaker 5: are you on?

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Speaker 3: Like are you? Like?

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Speaker 5: Are we on this week? Like I'm coming home and

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Speaker 5: I'm like, fucking oath, We're on, Like I can't wait

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Speaker 5: to see you. Let's just bang.

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Speaker 3: But like on on those particular weeks, he'd be extra.

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Speaker 5: Stoked, you know yeah, and then I'd be like after that,

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Speaker 5: fuck and I need a don't come here, you're going

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Speaker 5: back over nah?

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Speaker 3: Nah?

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Speaker 5: I mean like that's the beauty of long distance, right.

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Speaker 5: It's funny because if I get into another relationship ever

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Speaker 5: one day, I don't really want long distance, but I

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Speaker 5: do look back and just absolutely love the whole like,

320
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Speaker 5: oh my god, they are away, you miss them, You're

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Speaker 5: fucking lusting for them, and they get back, You're like,

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Speaker 5: fuck yeah, Like I can't wait to just like hug

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Speaker 5: and ship and see you.

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Speaker 1: It's exciting.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it always exciting.

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Speaker 1: You're canning down. It's almost like, you know, yeah, the

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Speaker 1: adult Christmas were like I get to see them in

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Speaker 1: a week and two nights and then you have a

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Speaker 1: little window together. Yeah. Sometimes I mean now like Laura

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Speaker 1: and I will be on the couch and I'll just

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Speaker 1: be scrolling on my phone, yeah, because we're just you know.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, definitely, you definitely cherish the time that you

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00:14:16,720 --> 00:14:19,320
Speaker 5: have with each other, and you're like, you know, they're

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Speaker 5: going in three days, You're not.

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Speaker 3: You're like fucking making the most of it.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, and then you're crying at the airport, but then

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00:14:25,040 --> 00:14:27,320
Speaker 5: you're like actually loving this space, get to get piece

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Speaker 5: with the girls and just half my moment and coming back.

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Speaker 1: Yes, how long were you trying for until you're like, oh,

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Speaker 1: why isn't it happening?

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Speaker 5: Yeah, so we were nearly we were trying for nearly

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Speaker 5: a year, but I'd already been on the forefront and

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Speaker 5: going to my doctor going I mean, I reckon heaps.

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Speaker 5: The chicks think this, Oh my god. As soon as

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Speaker 5: I go off the pill, We're just going to fall

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Speaker 5: pregnant straight away.

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Speaker 3: So like yeah, I was like, yeah, so I was

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Speaker 3: like four months in. Why the fuck am I not

349
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Speaker 3: pregnant yet? So go to the doctor.

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Speaker 5: We do my am H testing, which we talk about

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Speaker 5: a lot of Yeah, so this is a you guys

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Speaker 5: have lots of girl listeners. Yeah, yeah, Okay, we talk

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00:15:04,360 --> 00:15:06,360
Speaker 5: about this is really helpful on our podcast.

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Speaker 3: We talk about this a lot.

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Speaker 5: So if you're a young girl you want to start

356
00:15:08,840 --> 00:15:10,960
Speaker 5: trying for a baby and it's not working or whatever,

357
00:15:11,240 --> 00:15:14,080
Speaker 5: get this tested as early on as you can. And

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Speaker 5: a lot of doctors don't just do it. You kind

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00:15:17,200 --> 00:15:19,440
Speaker 5: of really have to ask. So it's called getting your

360
00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:23,840
Speaker 5: am H tested, and they're your it's like your amount

361
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Speaker 5: of eggs or your level of eggs.

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Speaker 3: OK.

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00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:28,680
Speaker 5: So we got mind tested and you have to do

364
00:15:28,720 --> 00:15:30,720
Speaker 5: the blood test at a certain time in your cycle

365
00:15:30,800 --> 00:15:33,520
Speaker 5: or whatever. And it showed that I So I was

366
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Speaker 5: like twenty six or seven at the time, and my

367
00:15:35,880 --> 00:15:39,560
Speaker 5: AMH was really low. The number was like two or three,

368
00:15:39,800 --> 00:15:42,400
Speaker 5: which it probably should have been like fifteen, and it

369
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Speaker 5: was on the scale. It was showing that I was

370
00:15:44,400 --> 00:15:49,520
Speaker 5: like close like my biological whatever was close to me

371
00:15:49,680 --> 00:15:52,080
Speaker 5: being like thirty eight or something rather than like twenty

372
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Speaker 5: eight or twenty seven. Okay, and it but what it

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Speaker 5: doesn't show is so don't want that to scare anyone,

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Speaker 5: because what it showed is my egg account was really

375
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Speaker 5: low for my age, and you can't grow more eggs.

376
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Speaker 5: So what you have is you're born with eggs and

377
00:16:03,920 --> 00:16:05,800
Speaker 5: each month you lose them, so you don't get more.

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00:16:06,320 --> 00:16:09,240
Speaker 5: But the quality of them was really high. So that's

379
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Speaker 5: what we found out later when I started to do IVF. Yeah,

380
00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:15,320
Speaker 5: so you can have really high egg count but really

381
00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:17,360
Speaker 5: shit quality eggs, which is why a lot of people

382
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Speaker 5: miscarriage a lot or I mean, I don't want to

383
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Speaker 5: speak too much. I'm not a doctor obviously, but that's

384
00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:23,360
Speaker 5: when my doctor was like, you know what, this is

385
00:16:23,440 --> 00:16:25,720
Speaker 5: kind of unfortunate for your age. You have a really

386
00:16:25,760 --> 00:16:28,640
Speaker 5: low egg count. Turns out, my best friend Chloe, who

387
00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:30,880
Speaker 5: I do the podcast with, has had it, also has

388
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Speaker 5: a really low egg count.

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Speaker 3: Strange.

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Speaker 5: She was like, you know what, keep trying till the

391
00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:39,440
Speaker 5: rest of the year and then let's start thinking about

392
00:16:39,440 --> 00:16:41,400
Speaker 5: freezing your eggs. You're still really young, but let's start

393
00:16:41,720 --> 00:16:43,560
Speaker 5: thinking about doing IVF and freezing them.

394
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Speaker 3: And shit.

395
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Speaker 5: Then but Chump passed away like a month later, after

396
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Speaker 5: we found out that my egg count was low. So

397
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Speaker 5: I yeah, I did go on and do IVF and

398
00:16:55,240 --> 00:16:58,240
Speaker 5: like have his baby later. But yeah, I didn't really

399
00:16:58,240 --> 00:17:00,680
Speaker 5: imagine i'd be doing that. I I did think i'd

400
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Speaker 5: be doing IVF, but I didn't think i'd be doing

401
00:17:02,280 --> 00:17:02,840
Speaker 5: it alone.

402
00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:07,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, Okay, you mentioned Chump passing, and I do want

403
00:17:07,080 --> 00:17:10,959
Speaker 1: to say I'm sorry. It's it's when when you hear

404
00:17:10,960 --> 00:17:14,120
Speaker 1: about your story, you're like, fucking breaks my heart. Yeah,

405
00:17:14,680 --> 00:17:18,200
Speaker 1: it's so tragic. One of the really unique things about

406
00:17:18,240 --> 00:17:21,080
Speaker 1: your story is that in a moment where you're dealing

407
00:17:21,119 --> 00:17:26,080
Speaker 1: with unimaginable grief, you're then trying to digest that, but

408
00:17:26,119 --> 00:17:29,200
Speaker 1: then at the same time, this idea pops up that hey,

409
00:17:29,240 --> 00:17:32,960
Speaker 1: maybe we can extract sperm. Who had that idea?

410
00:17:34,040 --> 00:17:36,960
Speaker 5: Yeah, So I think someone said to me, like like

411
00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:39,840
Speaker 5: pretty early on, like fuck, maybe you're pregnant right now,

412
00:17:40,040 --> 00:17:42,600
Speaker 5: and like, I don't know. I just I think that

413
00:17:42,720 --> 00:17:45,119
Speaker 5: just went completely over my head. I was like, I

414
00:17:45,160 --> 00:17:47,600
Speaker 5: don't know, Chump's just like not alive right now. That's

415
00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:50,480
Speaker 5: the weirdest thing ever, Like I don't know it. Like

416
00:17:50,520 --> 00:17:52,960
Speaker 5: in the first, like yeah, like probably like on the day,

417
00:17:53,119 --> 00:17:57,000
Speaker 5: on the day, perhaps, yeah, Like I don't know, everyone

418
00:17:57,080 --> 00:17:58,840
Speaker 5: knew we were trying for a baby. So every month

419
00:17:58,920 --> 00:18:00,679
Speaker 5: my friend's like, how you go, Are you're pregnant?

420
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Speaker 3: Like you know, it was like that. So the girl's like, fuck,

421
00:18:03,600 --> 00:18:04,399
Speaker 3: what if you're pregnant?

422
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Speaker 5: And I'm like, oh, just what a weird fucking thought,

423
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Speaker 5: Like I still don't even believe that jump He's not

424
00:18:09,040 --> 00:18:10,399
Speaker 5: here and it's been nearly four years.

425
00:18:11,080 --> 00:18:12,920
Speaker 3: Like it was just such a state of shock.

426
00:18:13,280 --> 00:18:15,919
Speaker 5: But my friend Laura Ane, who we actually met at

427
00:18:15,920 --> 00:18:18,080
Speaker 5: her party, I was just telling you about she had

428
00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:24,320
Speaker 5: heard of her friend's partner passing and her friends saying overseas,

429
00:18:24,359 --> 00:18:26,440
Speaker 5: this was a story that happened overseas, and her friends saying,

430
00:18:26,520 --> 00:18:29,120
Speaker 5: I wish I got his sperm so that we could

431
00:18:29,200 --> 00:18:31,119
Speaker 5: have more babies because they she was pregnant when he

432
00:18:31,160 --> 00:18:34,520
Speaker 5: passed and stuff, and she wanted more. And so she

433
00:18:34,880 --> 00:18:38,400
Speaker 5: said to my mum and my brother and Chloe, Hey,

434
00:18:38,640 --> 00:18:41,480
Speaker 5: you know you can like retrieve sperm. This, Like I

435
00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:43,480
Speaker 5: don't think it's that common, Like I hadn't I hadn't

436
00:18:43,520 --> 00:18:44,040
Speaker 5: heard of it.

437
00:18:43,920 --> 00:18:48,600
Speaker 2: But you know, this is the first story, like crazy, Hey, yeah,

438
00:18:48,720 --> 00:18:50,480
Speaker 2: not the first time hearing it out of your mouth,

439
00:18:50,520 --> 00:18:53,040
Speaker 2: but yeah, the first story I've heard where you could

440
00:18:53,080 --> 00:18:53,320
Speaker 2: do that.

441
00:18:53,359 --> 00:18:54,880
Speaker 4: I never would never think.

442
00:18:55,000 --> 00:19:00,600
Speaker 5: So fucking bizarre. Like soa, my mom and Chlau started

443
00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:03,920
Speaker 5: contacting the this is like they had literally flowed to

444
00:19:03,960 --> 00:19:05,920
Speaker 5: the idea with me, and I was like, not in

445
00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:09,080
Speaker 5: any state to be talking to, but I literally was.

446
00:19:09,320 --> 00:19:10,640
Speaker 5: They were like, do you want us to look into

447
00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:13,640
Speaker 5: it? It was kind of just like I don't. I just said, yeah,

448
00:19:13,680 --> 00:19:15,679
Speaker 5: I don't know, fuck go away, like yes whatever.

449
00:19:15,960 --> 00:19:18,720
Speaker 1: Did you know that time was so important?

450
00:19:18,960 --> 00:19:19,120
Speaker 3: No?

451
00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:21,880
Speaker 5: I didn't know at the time. I was just like, yeah,

452
00:19:21,920 --> 00:19:23,600
Speaker 5: I don't know, Like what are we even talking about

453
00:19:23,640 --> 00:19:26,359
Speaker 5: right now? Like I've just died, like such a do

454
00:19:26,400 --> 00:19:27,040
Speaker 5: you know what.

455
00:19:27,760 --> 00:19:28,400
Speaker 3: My friend Laura?

456
00:19:28,480 --> 00:19:31,240
Speaker 5: Yes, So Laura had mentioned the idea, and then Chloe

457
00:19:31,320 --> 00:19:32,760
Speaker 5: and my mum were like, what the fuck are you

458
00:19:32,800 --> 00:19:33,200
Speaker 5: talking about?

459
00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:35,960
Speaker 3: That's so weird. Like no, they kind of like were

460
00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:39,320
Speaker 3: like just shut up, like just brush it.

461
00:19:39,359 --> 00:19:41,159
Speaker 5: And then she was like she kept pushing and she

462
00:19:41,240 --> 00:19:44,640
Speaker 5: was like no, no, this is like yeah, and.

463
00:19:44,560 --> 00:19:46,960
Speaker 3: I don't want to. Oh, you guys to regret this later,

464
00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:48,879
Speaker 3: and you have to do it now. This is the

465
00:19:48,880 --> 00:19:49,320
Speaker 3: story that.

466
00:19:49,280 --> 00:19:51,760
Speaker 5: I know later. I wasn't privy to this these conversations

467
00:19:51,800 --> 00:19:52,200
Speaker 5: at the time.

468
00:19:52,240 --> 00:19:54,199
Speaker 4: You know, I've met Laura before.

469
00:19:54,600 --> 00:19:57,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's so crazy for her, like just having a

470
00:19:58,200 --> 00:20:01,119
Speaker 2: place of mind to go, Okay, well everyone's grieving for

471
00:20:01,160 --> 00:20:04,240
Speaker 2: the loss of someone here and then to go. But

472
00:20:04,640 --> 00:20:06,719
Speaker 2: there's something that we could get out of this. I

473
00:20:06,800 --> 00:20:08,480
Speaker 2: know for me, i'd be like, should I say anything?

474
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:11,360
Speaker 4: It's so brave of her to say something.

475
00:20:11,240 --> 00:20:14,239
Speaker 5: And it's so admirable as well. Actually, because she was

476
00:20:14,400 --> 00:20:16,879
Speaker 5: a really close friend of Chumps. The loss of Chump

477
00:20:17,040 --> 00:20:19,320
Speaker 5: really affected her. So for her to switch into this

478
00:20:19,480 --> 00:20:23,520
Speaker 5: like no, this is like almost just being so realistic

479
00:20:24,960 --> 00:20:27,240
Speaker 5: and having to I don't know, have those conversations, and

480
00:20:27,280 --> 00:20:29,080
Speaker 5: I think she knows me so well and was like,

481
00:20:29,280 --> 00:20:30,440
Speaker 5: you guys are trying for a baby.

482
00:20:30,440 --> 00:20:31,840
Speaker 3: I think this is something you should do.

483
00:20:32,400 --> 00:20:34,199
Speaker 5: And she was really pushing for it, knowing that if

484
00:20:34,240 --> 00:20:36,480
Speaker 5: we didn't do it now, it's something I could regret later.

485
00:20:36,840 --> 00:20:38,680
Speaker 3: Like I just couldn't imagine if my kid wasn't here,

486
00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:39,200
Speaker 3: what the fuck?

487
00:20:39,800 --> 00:20:43,159
Speaker 1: But your family started then making the phone calls and

488
00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:45,879
Speaker 1: started digging around to see like the process of how

489
00:20:45,920 --> 00:20:46,320
Speaker 1: it happened.

490
00:20:46,640 --> 00:20:47,199
Speaker 3: Yes, so like.

491
00:20:47,240 --> 00:20:49,400
Speaker 5: Chump's family was in town too, and we're all like, yeah,

492
00:20:49,440 --> 00:20:51,560
Speaker 5: I don't know, like yes, just have a look into

493
00:20:51,600 --> 00:20:53,520
Speaker 5: it kind of thing. And then Chloe and my mum

494
00:20:53,560 --> 00:20:56,240
Speaker 5: started making calls. So there was this lawyer that they called.

495
00:20:56,240 --> 00:20:59,760
Speaker 5: They happened to call and he had Weirdly, there was

496
00:20:59,760 --> 00:21:02,919
Speaker 5: like one other case maybe there's a few, but there

497
00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:06,320
Speaker 5: was one in other case recently ish in Australia, in

498
00:21:06,359 --> 00:21:08,840
Speaker 5: Queensland that this had happened. The guy had died and

499
00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:12,080
Speaker 5: Aila Creswell is the story. I googled it and stuff.

500
00:21:12,320 --> 00:21:15,040
Speaker 5: She had done this and through this particular lawyer, which

501
00:21:15,080 --> 00:21:16,440
Speaker 5: is so random that we found him.

502
00:21:16,600 --> 00:21:18,480
Speaker 3: Now we were chatting to him. It was like, yeah,

503
00:21:18,520 --> 00:21:19,320
Speaker 3: I've just done this.

504
00:21:19,600 --> 00:21:21,439
Speaker 4: It's like this weird, so weird.

505
00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:24,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, why do you need a lawyer? Can you give

506
00:21:24,600 --> 00:21:26,560
Speaker 1: consent as.

507
00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:30,080
Speaker 5: The partner or Chumpy's parents also had to sign something too,

508
00:21:30,800 --> 00:21:33,119
Speaker 5: from I think from memory, yes, So the lawyer had

509
00:21:33,160 --> 00:21:35,280
Speaker 5: to just put in paperwork stuff, and then for the

510
00:21:35,280 --> 00:21:38,879
Speaker 5: coroners to go in and like actually do the procedure.

511
00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:40,720
Speaker 4: They must cover a whole bunch of differences.

512
00:21:40,960 --> 00:21:43,960
Speaker 2: Yes, in case something really bad happens to you or

513
00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:46,760
Speaker 2: something really bad happens in the process, and then there's

514
00:21:47,200 --> 00:21:49,520
Speaker 2: there can be you know, the family can feel short

515
00:21:49,640 --> 00:21:51,480
Speaker 2: change here or there or whatever it might be. So

516
00:21:51,680 --> 00:21:54,240
Speaker 2: I'm sure having a solicitor involve is probably the best

517
00:21:54,280 --> 00:21:55,840
Speaker 2: way forward to.

518
00:21:55,880 --> 00:21:58,160
Speaker 4: Get everyone consent in one place. Too.

519
00:21:58,240 --> 00:21:59,920
Speaker 3: I'm not so all over the legalities.

520
00:22:00,000 --> 00:22:01,399
Speaker 5: I feel like this question comes up a lot and

521
00:22:01,440 --> 00:22:03,440
Speaker 5: I really should know, and I just fucking don't.

522
00:22:03,680 --> 00:22:05,240
Speaker 1: I'm just trying to know about it.

523
00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:07,919
Speaker 5: It's like, she's here, you're not taking her away, and

524
00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:09,399
Speaker 5: that's that I don't care about.

525
00:22:11,080 --> 00:22:13,560
Speaker 1: One of the crazy things is that they say the

526
00:22:13,600 --> 00:22:17,040
Speaker 1: window is about thirty six hours. Yes, did you know

527
00:22:17,720 --> 00:22:18,880
Speaker 1: the exact time?

528
00:22:19,440 --> 00:22:20,159
Speaker 3: Not really.

529
00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:23,840
Speaker 5: I remember the doctor who actually was having a day

530
00:22:23,840 --> 00:22:26,480
Speaker 5: off that day and Chloe was cold calling doctors and

531
00:22:26,760 --> 00:22:28,200
Speaker 5: the receptionist.

532
00:22:27,720 --> 00:22:28,840
Speaker 3: Was like, there's this.

533
00:22:28,840 --> 00:22:31,000
Speaker 5: This was like the fifth doctor she'd called, by the way,

534
00:22:31,040 --> 00:22:33,280
Speaker 5: And the receptionist like, he's not in today, but this

535
00:22:33,320 --> 00:22:35,520
Speaker 5: is really interesting thing that you're asking me, and he

536
00:22:35,520 --> 00:22:36,919
Speaker 5: loves learning, so I'm going to ask him.

537
00:22:36,920 --> 00:22:39,120
Speaker 3: Blah blah. He came in on his day off.

538
00:22:39,119 --> 00:22:42,119
Speaker 5: It was actually nighttime that night, and he went into

539
00:22:42,160 --> 00:22:46,439
Speaker 5: the coronie and with the morgue and stuff, and anyway,

540
00:22:46,440 --> 00:22:49,800
Speaker 5: did the procedump on the yeah, in the thirty seventh hour,

541
00:22:50,440 --> 00:22:54,520
Speaker 5: and he I remember him saying, time's so sensitive, you

542
00:22:54,640 --> 00:22:57,359
Speaker 5: have to legally do it within a certain amount of hours.

543
00:22:57,880 --> 00:22:59,920
Speaker 5: Where he got there justin and Niculd time, like into

544
00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:04,480
Speaker 5: the last hour or something, but his sperm was so

545
00:23:04,840 --> 00:23:07,920
Speaker 5: healthy or whatever, and there was some wriggling around still,

546
00:23:08,040 --> 00:23:11,720
Speaker 5: So like he's like, yeah, IVF in general is like

547
00:23:11,800 --> 00:23:13,680
Speaker 5: always a risk and like it might not work, but

548
00:23:13,760 --> 00:23:15,440
Speaker 5: he's like, I just have a good feeling about it.

549
00:23:15,480 --> 00:23:18,440
Speaker 5: I saw them, like, you know, being healthy and wriggling

550
00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:20,879
Speaker 5: and moving, and so he was really happy with the

551
00:23:20,920 --> 00:23:24,119
Speaker 5: sample that he retrieved quite late in the piece. But

552
00:23:24,440 --> 00:23:26,359
Speaker 5: he did tell me that the sperm can survive in

553
00:23:26,400 --> 00:23:29,639
Speaker 5: someone's body a week after they've passed, but legally supposed

554
00:23:29,640 --> 00:23:31,240
Speaker 5: to get it within the first like two days or whatever.

555
00:23:31,440 --> 00:23:34,560
Speaker 3: Wow, fun facts, guys, I know.

556
00:23:34,760 --> 00:23:37,000
Speaker 2: And I know like it was such like a turbocharge

557
00:23:37,040 --> 00:23:39,919
Speaker 2: couple of days. Obviously, with everything happening on, your emotions

558
00:23:39,920 --> 00:23:42,840
Speaker 2: are high and low everywhere. I can't imagine. Do you

559
00:23:42,840 --> 00:23:45,560
Speaker 2: remember in that moment how that made you feel? That

560
00:23:45,600 --> 00:23:48,080
Speaker 2: that had distracted it? And he had said I have

561
00:23:48,080 --> 00:23:49,000
Speaker 2: a good feeling about this.

562
00:23:49,920 --> 00:23:54,880
Speaker 5: Honestly, at the time, I wasn't thinking babies anymore.

563
00:23:54,960 --> 00:23:57,080
Speaker 3: I was just like, what the fuck? How am I

564
00:23:57,160 --> 00:23:58,200
Speaker 3: going to survive this day?

565
00:23:58,240 --> 00:24:00,480
Speaker 5: And tomorrow and the next day, Like every day at

566
00:24:00,520 --> 00:24:03,639
Speaker 5: that point felt like a freaking mountain mount Everest that

567
00:24:03,680 --> 00:24:06,399
Speaker 5: I had to climb to like survive and go to

568
00:24:06,440 --> 00:24:07,959
Speaker 5: bed that night and figure out how I was going

569
00:24:08,000 --> 00:24:11,680
Speaker 5: to sleep that night. Like those early days, you're not thinking.

570
00:24:11,880 --> 00:24:14,399
Speaker 5: I was like proper in so much shock. I was

571
00:24:14,440 --> 00:24:16,720
Speaker 5: actually just not thinking honestly, for like six months.

572
00:24:16,800 --> 00:24:20,000
Speaker 1: How long was it before you thought, okay, well and like,

573
00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:22,320
Speaker 1: excuse my ignorance here, but you have to go into

574
00:24:22,359 --> 00:24:24,720
Speaker 1: the clinic. I'm mashine, do you have to have they

575
00:24:24,720 --> 00:24:26,479
Speaker 1: already got eggs already?

576
00:24:26,560 --> 00:24:27,800
Speaker 3: Oh, they didn't have eggs.

577
00:24:28,080 --> 00:24:31,399
Speaker 5: So it was about six months after he passed away,

578
00:24:31,520 --> 00:24:33,440
Speaker 5: and like I think, I just woke up one day.

579
00:24:33,640 --> 00:24:36,560
Speaker 5: I guess the idea that we had his sperm was

580
00:24:36,600 --> 00:24:38,359
Speaker 5: always somewhat in the back of my head, but like,

581
00:24:38,480 --> 00:24:42,159
Speaker 5: actually not. I don't think I really thought I was

582
00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:45,680
Speaker 5: going to go through with it alone. But one day

583
00:24:45,920 --> 00:24:48,199
Speaker 5: I just woke up and felt so strongly about it.

584
00:24:48,200 --> 00:24:50,320
Speaker 3: I was like, you know what, let's make the appointment.

585
00:24:50,440 --> 00:24:54,240
Speaker 5: Let's chat to this IVF guy and just see how

586
00:24:54,280 --> 00:24:56,400
Speaker 5: that feels. And I went in there with my mum

587
00:24:57,040 --> 00:25:00,520
Speaker 5: and he was like I remember for him saying. I

588
00:25:00,560 --> 00:25:02,920
Speaker 5: think he said something like it'll probably be a thirty

589
00:25:02,920 --> 00:25:05,160
Speaker 5: percent chance that will pull this off kind.

590
00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:07,720
Speaker 3: Of thing, and I don't know. I went away.

591
00:25:07,880 --> 00:25:09,920
Speaker 5: We thought about it, and I think it just felt right.

592
00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:13,080
Speaker 5: So he passed away in July twenty twenty. December twenty twenty,

593
00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:17,400
Speaker 5: I did my first transfer and then I was actually

594
00:25:17,440 --> 00:25:21,160
Speaker 5: down in hat Head with some friends for New Year's Eve,

595
00:25:21,359 --> 00:25:24,280
Speaker 5: and yeah, I had I had the transfer in me

596
00:25:24,560 --> 00:25:26,800
Speaker 5: and I actually missed like no, I don't want to

597
00:25:26,800 --> 00:25:30,560
Speaker 5: say miscarried, but the embryo didn't stick. So IVF had

598
00:25:30,560 --> 00:25:34,119
Speaker 5: failed essentially, and I saw it come out of me

599
00:25:34,160 --> 00:25:36,240
Speaker 5: when I peed, like just like a bit of blood

600
00:25:36,240 --> 00:25:38,800
Speaker 5: and shit like bit of stuff coming out, and I

601
00:25:38,840 --> 00:25:41,200
Speaker 5: was like, fuck, I think that's the little embryo coming out.

602
00:25:41,720 --> 00:25:44,320
Speaker 5: And then I and then that night was news Eve

603
00:25:44,320 --> 00:25:46,800
Speaker 5: and I can't even tell you how freaking depressed I

604
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:49,479
Speaker 5: was waking up on that. So that would have been

605
00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:52,200
Speaker 5: twenty twenty one, the News' day. I was like, oh

606
00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:54,600
Speaker 5: my god, I feel like twenty twenty is now over.

607
00:25:54,760 --> 00:25:57,280
Speaker 5: Chump was here in twenty twenty and now we're going

608
00:25:57,280 --> 00:25:58,119
Speaker 5: into twenty twenty one.

609
00:25:58,240 --> 00:26:01,040
Speaker 3: He's like just gone, like I'm lead him behind.

610
00:26:01,480 --> 00:26:03,640
Speaker 5: And then I was like, I've also lost this baby,

611
00:26:03,720 --> 00:26:07,720
Speaker 5: and I just like I really thought this, this is

612
00:26:07,760 --> 00:26:08,320
Speaker 5: gonna happen.

613
00:26:08,840 --> 00:26:10,359
Speaker 3: So Baby's gone.

614
00:26:10,640 --> 00:26:12,960
Speaker 5: That had gone out of my life, and then New

615
00:26:13,040 --> 00:26:14,359
Speaker 5: Year was starting, Chump wasn't here.

616
00:26:14,359 --> 00:26:16,040
Speaker 3: I was like, what the fuck is life? And like

617
00:26:16,119 --> 00:26:20,439
Speaker 3: I was so down. I couldn't tell you how you

618
00:26:20,480 --> 00:26:21,119
Speaker 3: get out of it.

619
00:26:21,160 --> 00:26:23,240
Speaker 5: You just have to get on with it and put

620
00:26:23,280 --> 00:26:24,840
Speaker 5: one foot food and like.

621
00:26:25,400 --> 00:26:26,560
Speaker 3: There's just no option.

622
00:26:26,720 --> 00:26:30,240
Speaker 5: You just got to keep going, like you just you

623
00:26:30,320 --> 00:26:31,440
Speaker 5: just have to get through each day.

624
00:26:31,480 --> 00:26:33,000
Speaker 3: Some days feel like they go on forever.

625
00:26:33,359 --> 00:26:35,399
Speaker 5: I used to get scared for nighttime because I'd be like,

626
00:26:35,440 --> 00:26:37,640
Speaker 5: how am I going to sleep? Got back from hat

627
00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:40,000
Speaker 5: Head and I was like, cool, doctor, it didn't work

628
00:26:40,040 --> 00:26:42,320
Speaker 5: out my periods here, what happens?

629
00:26:42,320 --> 00:26:44,160
Speaker 3: Should we try again? Blah blah? He advised.

630
00:26:44,240 --> 00:26:47,800
Speaker 5: I was like, I was very much like, let's just

631
00:26:47,880 --> 00:26:50,160
Speaker 5: keep going. Let's chuck the next embryo in. I had three,

632
00:26:50,280 --> 00:26:52,680
Speaker 5: so I'd already done one. I was like let's just

633
00:26:52,800 --> 00:26:54,800
Speaker 5: keep going. I don't want to waste any time, Like

634
00:26:55,000 --> 00:26:57,400
Speaker 5: I need something to fucking look forward to in life.

635
00:26:57,480 --> 00:27:00,560
Speaker 5: Right now, I'm not good and he was like, you

636
00:27:00,600 --> 00:27:03,520
Speaker 5: need a month off rebalance your hormones, sought yourself out,

637
00:27:03,600 --> 00:27:06,320
Speaker 5: like go, I don't know whatever. And that pissed me

638
00:27:06,359 --> 00:27:08,920
Speaker 5: off listening to him, but it was probably the best

639
00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:11,720
Speaker 5: thing I did. Had a month off IVF, just went

640
00:27:11,800 --> 00:27:15,200
Speaker 5: and try to get through life. Came back in fairbit

641
00:27:15,320 --> 00:27:18,840
Speaker 5: and did another transfer and I, yeah, my mom came

642
00:27:18,840 --> 00:27:21,359
Speaker 5: in with me. I just like knew this one was

643
00:27:21,400 --> 00:27:22,600
Speaker 5: going to work. I don't know, I'm not really a

644
00:27:22,600 --> 00:27:24,920
Speaker 5: woo Wood person at all, but something just was like,

645
00:27:25,200 --> 00:27:27,359
Speaker 5: this is my kid, this one is the one.

646
00:27:28,040 --> 00:27:31,440
Speaker 3: And yep, nine months later, Mini came out. It was

647
00:27:31,480 --> 00:27:31,800
Speaker 3: a girl.

648
00:27:31,880 --> 00:27:33,400
Speaker 5: I didn't find out it was a girl. Found out

649
00:27:33,400 --> 00:27:37,560
Speaker 5: when I had her in the birthing suite. Everyone said

650
00:27:37,600 --> 00:27:40,000
Speaker 5: she was going to be a boy, and yeah she

651
00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:42,320
Speaker 5: was a girl, and I knew she. I was like,

652
00:27:42,359 --> 00:27:44,080
Speaker 5: I bet this is a girl. Like I need to

653
00:27:44,080 --> 00:27:45,920
Speaker 5: disagree with Like I kind of wanted to be different

654
00:27:45,920 --> 00:27:47,919
Speaker 5: because everyone was like, it'll be a little chumpy, and

655
00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:49,880
Speaker 5: I think they wanted it to be a little chumpy,

656
00:27:50,080 --> 00:27:51,359
Speaker 5: and I was like, nah, he's going to give me

657
00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:52,520
Speaker 5: a little best friend.

658
00:27:52,920 --> 00:27:54,240
Speaker 4: What was your pregnancy life?

659
00:27:54,280 --> 00:27:56,479
Speaker 2: Do you remember anything about it that you thought, oh,

660
00:27:56,680 --> 00:27:58,720
Speaker 2: fucking I hate this part of it, or something you

661
00:27:58,760 --> 00:27:59,760
Speaker 2: really loved about it.

662
00:28:00,119 --> 00:28:05,760
Speaker 5: I Chloe, my best friend's pregnant at the moment right now,

663
00:28:05,880 --> 00:28:08,000
Speaker 5: and she's just like, get this thing out of me,

664
00:28:08,080 --> 00:28:11,240
Speaker 5: and I'm like, it makes me keep thinking back to

665
00:28:11,320 --> 00:28:12,399
Speaker 5: my pregnancy, and I'm.

666
00:28:12,280 --> 00:28:13,600
Speaker 1: Like, did you have any cravings?

667
00:28:14,000 --> 00:28:14,200
Speaker 3: Yeah?

668
00:28:14,280 --> 00:28:18,960
Speaker 5: Yeah, I just ate so much just chocolate, just cheesy

669
00:28:19,040 --> 00:28:24,359
Speaker 5: my scrollsese Reggie chocolate. I was real sweet and savory.

670
00:28:24,480 --> 00:28:26,680
Speaker 5: I wasn't really one or the other. Oh and Parsley

671
00:28:26,760 --> 00:28:30,040
Speaker 5: and like randomly just really Parsley from the like literally

672
00:28:30,760 --> 00:28:33,960
Speaker 5: just fighting into it like a bloody like.

673
00:28:33,359 --> 00:28:34,200
Speaker 3: Like a horse.

674
00:28:36,680 --> 00:28:38,800
Speaker 1: How are you and Parsley? Now, I love.

675
00:28:38,640 --> 00:28:41,360
Speaker 5: Parsley, but yeah, well I don't eat it like a

676
00:28:41,400 --> 00:28:50,600
Speaker 5: horse anymore. But but I look, I think I was

677
00:28:50,600 --> 00:28:51,160
Speaker 5: pretty lucky.

678
00:28:51,200 --> 00:28:52,560
Speaker 3: I vomited a lot in the start.

679
00:28:52,640 --> 00:28:55,360
Speaker 5: I had heaps of morning sickness, but it was all

680
00:28:55,400 --> 00:28:57,760
Speaker 5: pretty funny. My friends used to think it was hilarious.

681
00:28:57,760 --> 00:28:59,560
Speaker 5: So I'd be walking along the beach with them in

682
00:28:59,600 --> 00:29:02,880
Speaker 5: the morning. I was like a real early rise. I

683
00:29:02,880 --> 00:29:04,280
Speaker 5: mean the dog would be walking along the beach and

684
00:29:04,280 --> 00:29:08,760
Speaker 5: I'd just be always spewing, like at the beach, yeah,

685
00:29:08,880 --> 00:29:10,320
Speaker 5: and was finding My friends would film it.

686
00:29:10,480 --> 00:29:12,360
Speaker 3: We all like they still send me videos, so like,

687
00:29:12,360 --> 00:29:13,080
Speaker 3: look what I found.

688
00:29:13,080 --> 00:29:16,120
Speaker 5: I'm just like I was in the main street of Brunswick,

689
00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:19,480
Speaker 5: like outside the bakery, just like proper projectile vomiting in

690
00:29:19,480 --> 00:29:19,920
Speaker 5: the street.

691
00:29:20,200 --> 00:29:21,800
Speaker 3: My friend just sent me the video the other day.

692
00:29:21,800 --> 00:29:22,960
Speaker 3: I'm like, yuck, what's wrong with me?

693
00:29:23,080 --> 00:29:24,200
Speaker 4: It's funny too, because.

694
00:29:23,960 --> 00:29:25,840
Speaker 1: When video I.

695
00:29:27,720 --> 00:29:29,360
Speaker 3: Would, I got it. I posted the other.

696
00:29:29,680 --> 00:29:32,680
Speaker 2: Because you know, pregnant women are usually they're sick in

697
00:29:32,680 --> 00:29:34,920
Speaker 2: that phase where it's kind of like you can't really

698
00:29:34,960 --> 00:29:36,880
Speaker 2: if you don't know them, you're an outside of looking

699
00:29:36,920 --> 00:29:39,560
Speaker 2: in you can like are they just really hungover or

700
00:29:39,600 --> 00:29:41,880
Speaker 2: are they actually yes.

701
00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:44,400
Speaker 5: A feeling you can't describe it is like a real

702
00:29:44,520 --> 00:29:48,160
Speaker 5: hungover feeling and just a flat like yeah, like I

703
00:29:48,240 --> 00:29:51,280
Speaker 5: just have no energy, like I just you just feel

704
00:29:51,360 --> 00:29:52,960
Speaker 5: so shit in the first few months.

705
00:29:53,720 --> 00:29:56,480
Speaker 3: But overall, I do think.

706
00:29:56,320 --> 00:29:59,200
Speaker 5: I got pretty lucky and had a good look at

707
00:29:59,240 --> 00:30:01,520
Speaker 5: Chloe and I'm like, man, and you're uncomfortable, and I

708
00:30:01,640 --> 00:30:02,840
Speaker 5: was not uncomfortable at the end.

709
00:30:02,840 --> 00:30:03,920
Speaker 3: I think I'm a lot taller.

710
00:30:04,440 --> 00:30:06,160
Speaker 4: I saw a video for me this morning when she

711
00:30:06,280 --> 00:30:08,640
Speaker 4: was walking up on them. Yeah, and she's just like she.

712
00:30:08,760 --> 00:30:11,360
Speaker 2: Just looks over it, and it's kind of like I

713
00:30:11,400 --> 00:30:14,240
Speaker 2: get like my wife is like I miss being pregnant

714
00:30:14,240 --> 00:30:17,600
Speaker 2: in certain certain stages. But I can imagine that that

715
00:30:17,760 --> 00:30:20,200
Speaker 2: last stage and I do kind of remember what it

716
00:30:20,240 --> 00:30:22,680
Speaker 2: was like when April was really uncomfortable. But yeah, I

717
00:30:22,680 --> 00:30:23,600
Speaker 2: can imagine that.

718
00:30:23,680 --> 00:30:25,880
Speaker 5: I keep saying to her, You're going to miss this belly,

719
00:30:25,920 --> 00:30:27,360
Speaker 5: like stop wishing it away, and she's.

720
00:30:27,200 --> 00:30:27,959
Speaker 3: Like, shut up.

721
00:30:30,680 --> 00:30:33,000
Speaker 5: But I do miss the belly. The novelty of having

722
00:30:33,040 --> 00:30:34,600
Speaker 5: that big belly is so fun.

723
00:30:34,800 --> 00:30:35,800
Speaker 3: Like I just love that.

724
00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:38,400
Speaker 5: I think I love everyone coming and touching it. Like

725
00:30:38,440 --> 00:30:40,760
Speaker 5: some people like don't touch, like, don't touch my belly,

726
00:30:40,840 --> 00:30:41,440
Speaker 5: like I do it.

727
00:30:41,520 --> 00:30:42,640
Speaker 3: I'm like, come and get it.

728
00:30:42,800 --> 00:30:43,400
Speaker 4: I love it.

729
00:30:44,760 --> 00:30:46,280
Speaker 1: Did you go drug free?

730
00:30:46,880 --> 00:30:47,040
Speaker 2: Ah?

731
00:30:47,120 --> 00:30:48,600
Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah yeah.

732
00:30:49,560 --> 00:30:52,560
Speaker 5: I don't know why it was fucked And I recommend

733
00:30:52,800 --> 00:30:54,200
Speaker 5: getting the ebby drill.

734
00:30:54,280 --> 00:30:57,280
Speaker 3: I reckon if I go again, I'm drugs. I want

735
00:30:57,280 --> 00:30:59,440
Speaker 3: the gas. I want everything. I got nothing.

736
00:31:00,760 --> 00:31:02,480
Speaker 4: It was the worst was in the hospital with you.

737
00:31:02,520 --> 00:31:04,040
Speaker 4: Who was your biggest your mum was.

738
00:31:03,960 --> 00:31:06,959
Speaker 2: Your biggest Because you've got such a big support network.

739
00:31:07,000 --> 00:31:10,920
Speaker 2: Anyone who's met you follows you, sees you can see

740
00:31:11,040 --> 00:31:13,600
Speaker 2: how much the people around you love you during that

741
00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:17,240
Speaker 2: time when you were like trying after Chumpy had passed.

742
00:31:17,680 --> 00:31:19,600
Speaker 2: Who who are the people that you think that you

743
00:31:19,720 --> 00:31:20,520
Speaker 2: lent on the most?

744
00:31:20,720 --> 00:31:23,960
Speaker 5: Yeah, my my mom, my brother and my girlfriends, and

745
00:31:24,400 --> 00:31:27,680
Speaker 5: yeah they're got like I have, I love my friend's boyfriends.

746
00:31:27,680 --> 00:31:31,520
Speaker 5: I've got like the strongest support network. Like I got

747
00:31:31,560 --> 00:31:35,080
Speaker 5: so many girlfriends, guy friends. They were seriously like a village,

748
00:31:35,080 --> 00:31:38,120
Speaker 5: Like they're all my brothers and sisters and we're so close.

749
00:31:38,320 --> 00:31:39,280
Speaker 3: I'm so lucky, so.

750
00:31:39,320 --> 00:31:40,520
Speaker 4: Much stuff, so isolated.

751
00:31:40,520 --> 00:31:43,480
Speaker 2: I suppose having that support network you can those days

752
00:31:43,480 --> 00:31:45,600
Speaker 2: when you're feeling really shit, like it's just nice to

753
00:31:45,640 --> 00:31:46,640
Speaker 2: be heard by someone.

754
00:31:46,920 --> 00:31:49,280
Speaker 1: How do you think for other people who may have

755
00:31:49,320 --> 00:31:51,760
Speaker 1: a friend who's going through grief, what are the things

756
00:31:51,800 --> 00:31:53,640
Speaker 1: that your friends did for you that really helped?

757
00:31:54,280 --> 00:31:54,760
Speaker 3: Yeah?

758
00:31:54,840 --> 00:31:57,920
Speaker 5: So I think it is really awkward for the support givers.

759
00:31:57,960 --> 00:32:00,640
Speaker 5: They don't know like what to say. Do I talk

760
00:32:00,680 --> 00:32:02,200
Speaker 5: about the person? Do I not talk about the person?

761
00:32:02,200 --> 00:32:03,520
Speaker 5: Do they want a distraction today?

762
00:32:04,520 --> 00:32:04,720
Speaker 1: Yeah?

763
00:32:04,800 --> 00:32:05,520
Speaker 4: Like what do you?

764
00:32:05,640 --> 00:32:07,200
Speaker 3: And I always felt really awkward for them.

765
00:32:07,240 --> 00:32:08,960
Speaker 5: I was like, I don't want them feeling awkward and

766
00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:10,520
Speaker 5: not wanting to hang out with me because they feel

767
00:32:10,520 --> 00:32:12,160
Speaker 5: awkward because they don't know how to dance around my

768
00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:13,600
Speaker 5: grief or what I'm feeling that day.

769
00:32:14,240 --> 00:32:15,560
Speaker 3: But they were really.

770
00:32:15,960 --> 00:32:18,000
Speaker 5: I was so open with them, and I think that's

771
00:32:18,160 --> 00:32:21,160
Speaker 5: easier for them to just like feel less awkward when

772
00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:23,800
Speaker 5: I'm just like I don't know, just like it's all

773
00:32:23,800 --> 00:32:26,040
Speaker 5: out on the table with me kind of thing, Whereas

774
00:32:26,120 --> 00:32:27,560
Speaker 5: like a lot of people would grieve a bit more

775
00:32:27,600 --> 00:32:29,760
Speaker 5: privately when I don't know.

776
00:32:29,880 --> 00:32:32,760
Speaker 3: But I think, just be there, just keep being there.

777
00:32:32,760 --> 00:32:34,640
Speaker 5: If they don't answer the phone, just rock up, just

778
00:32:34,720 --> 00:32:36,560
Speaker 5: keep texting, just like, don't give up.

779
00:32:36,640 --> 00:32:38,560
Speaker 2: I feel like your honesty would really help them too.

780
00:32:38,600 --> 00:32:41,200
Speaker 2: You're very sitting here next to you now, You're very

781
00:32:41,440 --> 00:32:43,400
Speaker 2: honest with everything. I think that would really help a

782
00:32:43,400 --> 00:32:45,880
Speaker 2: person that's feeling a little bit awkward about how do

783
00:32:45,960 --> 00:32:46,880
Speaker 2: I help this person.

784
00:32:47,600 --> 00:32:50,360
Speaker 5: At this start, I was pretty open with just going

785
00:32:50,480 --> 00:32:55,040
Speaker 5: I'm fucking dying today, like I don't know, be here,

786
00:32:55,120 --> 00:32:57,120
Speaker 5: don't be here, but like, don't even talk to me.

787
00:32:57,160 --> 00:32:58,680
Speaker 5: If you're going to be here, just fucking sit there

788
00:32:58,680 --> 00:33:00,560
Speaker 5: and shut up today, like I just don't feel like

789
00:33:00,640 --> 00:33:01,800
Speaker 5: chatting or.

790
00:33:01,800 --> 00:33:03,160
Speaker 3: I was probably really open.

791
00:33:04,000 --> 00:33:06,000
Speaker 5: I think I used to be good at communicating my

792
00:33:06,040 --> 00:33:08,520
Speaker 5: feelings and now, like last week, I just moved into

793
00:33:08,520 --> 00:33:11,880
Speaker 5: this new place and I've just been really rattled and like.

794
00:33:12,560 --> 00:33:14,360
Speaker 3: Privately doing it, I think.

795
00:33:14,800 --> 00:33:17,520
Speaker 5: And like my friend, like Chloe, that they lived down

796
00:33:17,560 --> 00:33:20,400
Speaker 5: the road and they were like walking past or whatever.

797
00:33:20,200 --> 00:33:22,120
Speaker 3: And she saw me just like crying, and she's like,

798
00:33:22,200 --> 00:33:23,560
Speaker 3: what's wrong? Why didn't you tell me? I'm like, I

799
00:33:23,600 --> 00:33:24,880
Speaker 3: don't know. I'm just like I feel like.

800
00:33:24,880 --> 00:33:28,800
Speaker 5: I'm not as good now at articulating my emotions and shit, Weirdly,

801
00:33:30,520 --> 00:33:34,719
Speaker 5: I don't know, maybe it's more it's so much further on,

802
00:33:35,080 --> 00:33:38,719
Speaker 5: and I feel I don't feel like I know it's valid,

803
00:33:39,040 --> 00:33:40,560
Speaker 5: but I feel like, oh, I don't want to burden

804
00:33:40,640 --> 00:33:43,560
Speaker 5: my friends with this shit still, like I know that

805
00:33:43,560 --> 00:33:45,640
Speaker 5: that's not how it is, and they would never think that,

806
00:33:46,360 --> 00:33:49,280
Speaker 5: but like I'm like, I know they'd be like, well,

807
00:33:49,320 --> 00:33:52,400
Speaker 5: what's what's wrong, even though it could be self explainatory,

808
00:33:52,440 --> 00:33:54,440
Speaker 5: and then I have to explain, like I really miss

809
00:33:54,560 --> 00:33:56,959
Speaker 5: Chumpy and I've moved and this feels fucked and dah

810
00:33:57,040 --> 00:34:00,200
Speaker 5: dah da da da. But like I'm like, I just

811
00:34:00,240 --> 00:34:03,520
Speaker 5: think I feel. At the start, it was very much

812
00:34:03,600 --> 00:34:05,800
Speaker 5: like obviously this is how I'm feeling because of X,

813
00:34:05,920 --> 00:34:07,840
Speaker 5: Y and Z, And now it's like, oh, why are

814
00:34:07,880 --> 00:34:08,600
Speaker 5: you so sad today?

815
00:34:08,640 --> 00:34:09,239
Speaker 3: Like why are you crying?

816
00:34:09,239 --> 00:34:11,600
Speaker 5: And I'm like, honestly, I'm just fucking having a moment

817
00:34:11,719 --> 00:34:16,400
Speaker 5: and still still griefy shit, just lingering around and I

818
00:34:16,440 --> 00:34:18,520
Speaker 5: know it's valid, but it doesn't. I don't feel like

819
00:34:18,560 --> 00:34:22,240
Speaker 5: I need to, like, like, I think it surprises people

820
00:34:22,239 --> 00:34:25,839
Speaker 5: more when they find me in a heap crying. They're like, oh, shit,

821
00:34:25,880 --> 00:34:27,279
Speaker 5: you should have told us, and I'm like, nah, I'm

822
00:34:27,320 --> 00:34:28,600
Speaker 5: just doing it on my own now.

823
00:34:28,800 --> 00:34:30,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, kind of thing.

824
00:34:30,320 --> 00:34:33,920
Speaker 1: That's I think a lot of people are like that. Yeah, well,

825
00:34:33,960 --> 00:34:36,680
Speaker 1: when you've been getting so much help for a long time,

826
00:34:36,880 --> 00:34:38,520
Speaker 1: you also have a sense of like, oh I should

827
00:34:38,520 --> 00:34:39,680
Speaker 1: be doing this on my own now.

828
00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:42,719
Speaker 5: Yes, I think that too, And I am really an

829
00:34:42,719 --> 00:34:46,240
Speaker 5: independent person, so I think it almost like I probably

830
00:34:46,239 --> 00:34:50,000
Speaker 5: frustrate my friends because they're like, fuck, you don't have

831
00:34:50,080 --> 00:34:51,440
Speaker 5: to do it alone. Why don't you tell us you're

832
00:34:51,440 --> 00:34:53,839
Speaker 5: having such a shit time like we're here, and I'm

833
00:34:53,840 --> 00:34:55,840
Speaker 5: like no, no, Like I think sometimes I need to

834
00:34:55,880 --> 00:34:58,040
Speaker 5: do this alone and you're busy.

835
00:34:58,080 --> 00:35:00,319
Speaker 3: You guys are getting off with your fucking lives, and.

836
00:35:00,239 --> 00:35:03,800
Speaker 5: Like so am I but yeah, this and like sometimes

837
00:35:03,840 --> 00:35:06,480
Speaker 5: the waves of griefs now they actually take me by

838
00:35:06,520 --> 00:35:09,400
Speaker 5: surprise as well, and I'm like, fuck, this sucks, Like

839
00:35:09,680 --> 00:35:11,359
Speaker 5: I just got to ride this one out and I'll

840
00:35:11,360 --> 00:35:12,879
Speaker 5: do it alone because I'm going to know my friends

841
00:35:12,920 --> 00:35:14,960
Speaker 5: about it right now. Like it's like a bit of

842
00:35:15,000 --> 00:35:17,320
Speaker 5: a different different motions.

843
00:35:18,680 --> 00:35:22,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, no drugs for the child birth? Yes, sorry, oh man,

844
00:35:23,719 --> 00:35:26,960
Speaker 1: for anyone who hasn't been in the room. For anyone

845
00:35:26,960 --> 00:35:30,680
Speaker 1: who hasn't given birth, what's it like? And especially because

846
00:35:31,280 --> 00:35:33,960
Speaker 1: I can't imagine doing that without drugs? But you're in

847
00:35:33,960 --> 00:35:37,279
Speaker 1: a moment of like extreme pain. And then what's it

848
00:35:37,360 --> 00:35:39,239
Speaker 1: like when you get to see your child for the

849
00:35:39,239 --> 00:35:40,799
Speaker 1: first time and you get to hold them?

850
00:35:41,080 --> 00:35:45,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, so hang the fuck on birth.

851
00:35:47,400 --> 00:35:50,880
Speaker 5: Obviously have seen it as dads, but holy Molly, like

852
00:35:51,120 --> 00:35:56,200
Speaker 5: nothing prepares you for that. It is excruciating. And you

853
00:35:56,400 --> 00:36:00,080
Speaker 5: have a plan, chuck that fucking plan, that plan, and

854
00:36:00,080 --> 00:36:03,960
Speaker 5: it's not sticking to pot. That is so true.

855
00:36:04,239 --> 00:36:05,160
Speaker 3: Like I had a plan.

856
00:36:05,400 --> 00:36:08,000
Speaker 5: I mean, I'm like a non planning plant person, but

857
00:36:08,080 --> 00:36:09,400
Speaker 5: I was like hey, I want to have it in

858
00:36:09,440 --> 00:36:11,959
Speaker 5: the bath, Like I'm real zoning, I'm going to breathe

859
00:36:12,000 --> 00:36:13,799
Speaker 5: through this thing. Let's have it in the bath. I

860
00:36:13,800 --> 00:36:17,400
Speaker 5: couldn't even fit in the fucking barth my legs, my

861
00:36:17,520 --> 00:36:20,480
Speaker 5: legs were way too long for this public hospital bath.

862
00:36:21,080 --> 00:36:25,600
Speaker 5: And yeah, no, the pain I felt, I think Minnie

863
00:36:25,680 --> 00:36:28,200
Speaker 5: was apparently turned the wrong way inside me and shit,

864
00:36:28,280 --> 00:36:30,800
Speaker 5: and she was taking ages to come out and blah blah.

865
00:36:30,920 --> 00:36:32,919
Speaker 5: My legs felt like they were going to fall off.

866
00:36:33,160 --> 00:36:37,600
Speaker 5: They were numb but also killing. The pain wasn't so

867
00:36:37,680 --> 00:36:39,560
Speaker 5: much in the contractions. It was more in my lower

868
00:36:39,600 --> 00:36:43,319
Speaker 5: back and my legs. I remember through my contractions I

869
00:36:43,360 --> 00:36:46,640
Speaker 5: was vomiting so like actually vomiting it all over me

870
00:36:46,680 --> 00:36:49,480
Speaker 5: as well. My mom was the fear in my mum's

871
00:36:49,719 --> 00:36:51,600
Speaker 5: face like said.

872
00:36:51,440 --> 00:36:51,960
Speaker 3: It all to me.

873
00:36:52,080 --> 00:36:54,160
Speaker 5: I was like, I think I'm gonna die, Like I

874
00:36:54,200 --> 00:36:57,360
Speaker 5: remember saying that to her. And she had had beautiful

875
00:36:57,400 --> 00:36:59,160
Speaker 5: bursts with me and my brother. She'd had really quick

876
00:36:59,160 --> 00:37:01,960
Speaker 5: bursts and get the She said to me, birth is painless,

877
00:37:02,520 --> 00:37:07,040
Speaker 5: it doesn't hurt. I don't know, this shouldn't matter. I

878
00:37:07,040 --> 00:37:09,799
Speaker 5: don't think this matters, but like in my head, my

879
00:37:09,960 --> 00:37:12,880
Speaker 5: mum is a stick. She's like a quarter of the

880
00:37:12,920 --> 00:37:16,160
Speaker 5: size of me. So I was like, mom's miniature. If

881
00:37:16,160 --> 00:37:18,480
Speaker 5: she can push out two big heads that me and

882
00:37:18,520 --> 00:37:21,040
Speaker 5: my brother had and it's apparently painless, this is a

883
00:37:21,120 --> 00:37:23,600
Speaker 5: walk in the park for me, and my baby was

884
00:37:23,600 --> 00:37:26,400
Speaker 5: pretty small, but the way whatever the fuck she was

885
00:37:26,400 --> 00:37:26,799
Speaker 5: doing in.

886
00:37:26,760 --> 00:37:28,400
Speaker 3: There, it was just killing.

887
00:37:28,640 --> 00:37:29,440
Speaker 4: Oh my goodness.

888
00:37:29,600 --> 00:37:32,719
Speaker 3: So yeah, birth was fucked, and I it was too late.

889
00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:35,400
Speaker 5: By the time I got through all all the hours

890
00:37:35,400 --> 00:37:39,000
Speaker 5: of dying in the whatever with the midwives and stuff,

891
00:37:39,280 --> 00:37:40,759
Speaker 5: it was just too late to get an epy. Like

892
00:37:40,800 --> 00:37:42,600
Speaker 5: by the time I was like, what's going on, guys,

893
00:37:42,600 --> 00:37:45,680
Speaker 5: can I get the epidural? They were like, you've literally

894
00:37:45,840 --> 00:37:48,040
Speaker 5: you've probably only got an hour left. You're about to

895
00:37:48,080 --> 00:37:51,440
Speaker 5: start start pushing. You've just done this for like seven hours,

896
00:37:51,480 --> 00:37:53,759
Speaker 5: like and I was like, oh yeah, okay. Now it's

897
00:37:53,840 --> 00:37:56,160
Speaker 5: like I'm this is a mental thing and I'm like, okay,

898
00:37:56,160 --> 00:37:57,680
Speaker 5: I'm not getting it, like I'm going to do this

899
00:37:57,840 --> 00:37:59,319
Speaker 5: because I was like I should have got it like

900
00:37:59,400 --> 00:38:03,560
Speaker 5: ten hours. But when she came out, I was just

901
00:38:03,600 --> 00:38:07,239
Speaker 5: so fricking frothing and believed that that was over and

902
00:38:07,400 --> 00:38:09,440
Speaker 5: trying to figure out how to hold this sip slippery

903
00:38:09,480 --> 00:38:10,320
Speaker 5: little slug because.

904
00:38:10,120 --> 00:38:12,840
Speaker 3: They're so slippery slippery, No one tells.

905
00:38:12,600 --> 00:38:15,160
Speaker 5: You that you're going to drop it like I was.

906
00:38:16,120 --> 00:38:16,879
Speaker 3: I wasn't in a bed.

907
00:38:16,920 --> 00:38:19,200
Speaker 5: I was on all fours on the little tile whatever

908
00:38:19,239 --> 00:38:22,960
Speaker 5: the floor is, and she was just so slippery, and

909
00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:25,080
Speaker 5: I was like, shit, we're all covered in blood and

910
00:38:25,160 --> 00:38:25,880
Speaker 5: vomited and everything.

911
00:38:25,880 --> 00:38:27,240
Speaker 3: I'm going to drop this little egg.

912
00:38:27,840 --> 00:38:31,240
Speaker 5: It took so long of me just catching my breath

913
00:38:31,280 --> 00:38:34,359
Speaker 5: and chilling for like a few minutes before my mum

914
00:38:34,360 --> 00:38:36,799
Speaker 5: and the midwives were like what is it? Check what

915
00:38:36,880 --> 00:38:37,239
Speaker 5: it is?

916
00:38:37,280 --> 00:38:38,400
Speaker 3: Like, where is it? You know?

917
00:38:38,480 --> 00:38:42,680
Speaker 5: What's what's the sex? And so that was super cool,

918
00:38:42,880 --> 00:38:43,359
Speaker 5: and I.

919
00:38:43,320 --> 00:38:44,479
Speaker 3: Was like, holy shit.

920
00:38:44,600 --> 00:38:46,640
Speaker 5: I was like almost scared to like look because I

921
00:38:46,680 --> 00:38:48,680
Speaker 5: was like, oh my god, I can't believe I've just

922
00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:51,840
Speaker 5: been so lost in this moment of like just frothing

923
00:38:51,840 --> 00:38:54,000
Speaker 5: that this little slugs in my arms that.

924
00:38:54,000 --> 00:38:56,760
Speaker 3: I haven't even thought to look at what it is.

925
00:38:56,640 --> 00:38:59,800
Speaker 5: Because I'm just so stoked to have a healthy baby

926
00:38:59,800 --> 00:39:00,719
Speaker 5: that's screaming at me.

927
00:39:01,320 --> 00:39:02,520
Speaker 3: And yeah, it was a girl.

928
00:39:02,800 --> 00:39:05,279
Speaker 1: Sometimes you ha Bbilical cords also a bit confusing as well.

929
00:39:07,400 --> 00:39:10,640
Speaker 3: Your homos. Do you have to cut it? Did you

930
00:39:10,719 --> 00:39:13,880
Speaker 3: cut it. Yeah, how hard is it to cut like Calamari?

931
00:39:15,840 --> 00:39:16,279
Speaker 3: It was like.

932
00:39:18,600 --> 00:39:21,120
Speaker 5: My mum had the scissors and was like chopping, like

933
00:39:21,239 --> 00:39:22,920
Speaker 5: trying to it was easy.

934
00:39:22,960 --> 00:39:25,520
Speaker 1: It's got to sharpen these because these are craps.

935
00:39:25,680 --> 00:39:29,839
Speaker 3: Yeah, literally, where's the properes? Get cut over?

936
00:39:30,280 --> 00:39:32,960
Speaker 1: The kids safety?

937
00:39:33,640 --> 00:39:35,880
Speaker 3: Exactly the plastic ones.

938
00:39:38,440 --> 00:39:41,319
Speaker 5: But nah, as you guys know, those moments are ridiculous.

939
00:39:41,360 --> 00:39:43,520
Speaker 3: And then I just remember they kind of.

940
00:39:43,520 --> 00:39:46,440
Speaker 5: Put me in the bed, babies on me, like figuring

941
00:39:46,480 --> 00:39:48,200
Speaker 5: out how to breastfeed and like that.

942
00:39:48,440 --> 00:39:50,680
Speaker 3: But just like you're so off with the fairies, You're

943
00:39:50,680 --> 00:39:51,359
Speaker 3: just like, what the hell?

944
00:39:51,760 --> 00:39:54,400
Speaker 5: And then they're just like stitching me up and doing

945
00:39:54,480 --> 00:39:58,000
Speaker 5: whatever they're doing. And that's not even I'm not even

946
00:39:58,040 --> 00:40:00,640
Speaker 5: feeling a thing there because you're just so wrapped up

947
00:40:00,680 --> 00:40:02,000
Speaker 5: in like, oh my god, you've got a baby on

948
00:40:03,200 --> 00:40:06,160
Speaker 5: such a cool and my mum was so great.

949
00:40:05,920 --> 00:40:08,800
Speaker 4: In those moments and was manni was she asleep? We

950
00:40:08,840 --> 00:40:10,160
Speaker 4: always say you get one or the other.

951
00:40:10,840 --> 00:40:14,080
Speaker 5: Yeah, okay, I reckon. I got really lucky with the

952
00:40:14,120 --> 00:40:19,320
Speaker 5: sleep thing. She is and still is a fantastic.

953
00:40:18,719 --> 00:40:20,000
Speaker 4: I see so many of your stories.

954
00:40:20,120 --> 00:40:20,919
Speaker 3: She's a good sleep.

955
00:40:22,080 --> 00:40:25,439
Speaker 5: She can fucking sleep anywhere, anytime, like I could chuck

956
00:40:25,480 --> 00:40:31,399
Speaker 5: her on the roof, like, but she there's a few

957
00:40:31,440 --> 00:40:35,080
Speaker 5: but so many, there's a few butts. So first of all,

958
00:40:35,120 --> 00:40:37,640
Speaker 5: the dummy. She still has a dummy, and that soothes her,

959
00:40:37,680 --> 00:40:39,240
Speaker 5: and that's how she sleeps.

960
00:40:39,200 --> 00:40:40,439
Speaker 3: In as soon as she does.

961
00:40:40,640 --> 00:40:46,200
Speaker 1: She's two and a half, gone through in a bit

962
00:40:46,280 --> 00:40:50,040
Speaker 1: and still oh yeah, killed for a dummy.

963
00:40:50,160 --> 00:40:52,240
Speaker 3: She just like, Okay, this makes me happy.

964
00:40:52,400 --> 00:40:54,120
Speaker 1: I feel it doesn't work.

965
00:40:54,480 --> 00:40:58,279
Speaker 4: Yeah, there's a lot of people in that boat still though, okay.

966
00:40:58,120 --> 00:41:00,560
Speaker 5: Good no, because as soon as she falls sleep at night,

967
00:41:00,600 --> 00:41:02,960
Speaker 5: I take the dummy edge, so and then she's asleep.

968
00:41:03,000 --> 00:41:04,279
Speaker 5: But then like say, in the middle of the night,

969
00:41:04,320 --> 00:41:05,880
Speaker 5: she'll be like, dummy, dummy, dummy, ummy, and I have

970
00:41:05,920 --> 00:41:08,719
Speaker 5: to go in find it, put it back in social sleep.

971
00:41:08,960 --> 00:41:11,719
Speaker 3: And I know I could just do cold turkey, have

972
00:41:11,840 --> 00:41:14,680
Speaker 3: three really shit nights and you know, but.

973
00:41:15,280 --> 00:41:18,200
Speaker 1: People say it could ruin their teeth, and to them,

974
00:41:18,280 --> 00:41:19,160
Speaker 1: I say, fuck off.

975
00:41:20,520 --> 00:41:23,719
Speaker 5: I'm gonna be able to afford braces day. I'm gonna

976
00:41:23,719 --> 00:41:25,560
Speaker 5: work really fucking hard in the next ten years and

977
00:41:25,600 --> 00:41:25,960
Speaker 5: hopefully I.

978
00:41:26,000 --> 00:41:29,200
Speaker 3: Have a spare few grand for braces. So that's my plan.

979
00:41:29,360 --> 00:41:29,840
Speaker 4: You're not going to.

980
00:41:32,080 --> 00:41:32,680
Speaker 3: The other week.

981
00:41:32,960 --> 00:41:35,280
Speaker 5: I was like, gonna go cold Turkey with the dummies

982
00:41:35,840 --> 00:41:38,759
Speaker 5: and sent her into KINDI with no dummy, and she

983
00:41:38,920 --> 00:41:41,680
Speaker 5: bloody bit children that day.

984
00:41:42,360 --> 00:41:45,879
Speaker 3: And it's so mortifying and fucking embarrassing.

985
00:41:46,760 --> 00:41:51,560
Speaker 5: Not just one kid, but like, I'd rather my kid

986
00:41:51,640 --> 00:41:54,200
Speaker 5: be getting bit We have a solution the other way around.

987
00:41:54,320 --> 00:41:58,400
Speaker 4: We have a solution. We asked the question to people.

988
00:41:58,480 --> 00:42:02,239
Speaker 1: We had a family friend who same scenario, and they

989
00:42:02,520 --> 00:42:03,960
Speaker 1: they were like, I don't know what to do. My

990
00:42:04,120 --> 00:42:06,000
Speaker 1: kid is a bier, and I think it's like everyone

991
00:42:06,120 --> 00:42:08,319
Speaker 1: every parent's worst night there of like I don't want

992
00:42:08,320 --> 00:42:10,760
Speaker 1: to have a kid that's a bier. So then after

993
00:42:10,840 --> 00:42:13,520
Speaker 1: a while of like continuous bites and other kids they

994
00:42:13,560 --> 00:42:15,920
Speaker 1: were they were like, I'm going to bite my kid.

995
00:42:16,160 --> 00:42:19,560
Speaker 3: Yeah I bit my kid. Yeah yeah. Well she cried

996
00:42:19,600 --> 00:42:21,359
Speaker 3: and it hurt her, but she didn't seem to give

997
00:42:21,360 --> 00:42:21,680
Speaker 3: a fuck.

998
00:42:21,840 --> 00:42:25,160
Speaker 4: She went another day, well you've got Jeffrey Dahmer on

999
00:42:25,200 --> 00:42:25,560
Speaker 4: your hands.

1000
00:42:28,640 --> 00:42:30,440
Speaker 3: Yeah. I bet her back one time, for sure, But

1001
00:42:31,600 --> 00:42:32,600
Speaker 3: so many parents were like.

1002
00:42:36,920 --> 00:42:40,920
Speaker 5: Emarrassing, I'd refers she get bit in and and then

1003
00:42:41,000 --> 00:42:44,000
Speaker 5: I went, honestly, I can't I either pull you out

1004
00:42:44,040 --> 00:42:45,360
Speaker 5: of KINDI or I have to send you in with

1005
00:42:45,440 --> 00:42:47,400
Speaker 5: a dummy because you obviously want to buy it something,

1006
00:42:47,680 --> 00:42:49,319
Speaker 5: and it's got to be that dummy, not another kid.

1007
00:42:49,320 --> 00:42:51,960
Speaker 5: Because this is just so mortifying. I feel like the

1008
00:42:52,040 --> 00:42:54,960
Speaker 5: other kids parents are looking at me, going your kids.

1009
00:42:55,200 --> 00:42:57,040
Speaker 3: They wouldn't know it's a great white shut.

1010
00:42:57,080 --> 00:42:58,600
Speaker 4: I wouldn't know that it was your kid. They're not

1011
00:42:58,640 --> 00:42:59,000
Speaker 4: meant to know.

1012
00:42:59,200 --> 00:43:01,520
Speaker 3: Well, the kids can talk, now, can't they. I'm pretty

1013
00:43:01,560 --> 00:43:02,760
Speaker 3: sure Brad.

1014
00:43:03,960 --> 00:43:06,799
Speaker 4: On the back and she were like trying to figure

1015
00:43:06,800 --> 00:43:10,080
Speaker 4: out who it was. But she was very coy, really.

1016
00:43:10,400 --> 00:43:12,480
Speaker 3: Good on hers trying to protect her friend brothers. I

1017
00:43:12,520 --> 00:43:14,439
Speaker 3: feel like all the kids in they're like, fucking Mini

1018
00:43:14,520 --> 00:43:15,080
Speaker 3: bit me today.

1019
00:43:15,160 --> 00:43:18,759
Speaker 4: Mom rattling off the kids name and she was like, yep,

1020
00:43:18,840 --> 00:43:20,800
Speaker 4: that was was that one? But it was yes to everything.

1021
00:43:23,200 --> 00:43:28,240
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh nah. But then the other butt is college.

1022
00:43:28,320 --> 00:43:30,480
Speaker 5: So she had colleague as a baby, and that is

1023
00:43:30,760 --> 00:43:36,120
Speaker 5: just freaking torture, like the unsettled stomach, the reflux of vomiting,

1024
00:43:36,200 --> 00:43:39,640
Speaker 5: the screaming, so one of like I always just remember

1025
00:43:39,719 --> 00:43:42,840
Speaker 5: these nights where and I wasn't.

1026
00:43:43,880 --> 00:43:46,120
Speaker 3: I had really good help, especially in the first few weeks.

1027
00:43:46,160 --> 00:43:48,040
Speaker 5: My mum actually had COVID after Mini was born, so

1028
00:43:48,120 --> 00:43:50,400
Speaker 5: she stayed away from us, but some of my friends

1029
00:43:50,440 --> 00:43:53,080
Speaker 5: were like like mum, friends left their kids and moved

1030
00:43:53,120 --> 00:43:56,840
Speaker 5: in with me and were there. Tiana my main like

1031
00:43:57,440 --> 00:44:00,520
Speaker 5: wet nurse friend. She was with me every night in

1032
00:44:00,520 --> 00:44:02,200
Speaker 5: the middle of the night, like helping me. You know,

1033
00:44:02,880 --> 00:44:04,560
Speaker 5: Minnie's crying, Okay, this is what you do. You grab her,

1034
00:44:04,640 --> 00:44:06,720
Speaker 5: check on your booby, brestfea da da dah, like kindness

1035
00:44:06,840 --> 00:44:07,920
Speaker 5: literally being my husband.

1036
00:44:08,120 --> 00:44:10,600
Speaker 3: Like she was teaching me everything I needed.

1037
00:44:10,440 --> 00:44:14,319
Speaker 5: To know about breastfeeding, you know, just every fucking little thing,

1038
00:44:14,440 --> 00:44:16,200
Speaker 5: like you get the little rashing on your nipples and

1039
00:44:16,200 --> 00:44:20,239
Speaker 5: all that cap and just like all those things, and

1040
00:44:20,360 --> 00:44:23,000
Speaker 5: helping soothe her because she did get really colliqy and

1041
00:44:23,040 --> 00:44:25,560
Speaker 5: so like you'd feed for like at the start, feels

1042
00:44:25,560 --> 00:44:27,719
Speaker 5: like you're feeding for two hours. It was like an

1043
00:44:27,760 --> 00:44:30,799
Speaker 5: hour on each boob, and then trying to get her

1044
00:44:30,840 --> 00:44:32,759
Speaker 5: back to sleep was like another two hours because she'd

1045
00:44:32,760 --> 00:44:36,880
Speaker 5: be screaming and collicky, and so that just sent me mental.

1046
00:44:37,280 --> 00:44:39,960
Speaker 5: Like I remember just having her in the carrier, or

1047
00:44:40,000 --> 00:44:41,360
Speaker 5: Tiana would have her in the carry and we'd be

1048
00:44:41,440 --> 00:44:44,160
Speaker 5: pacing up and down the hallway, and then one night

1049
00:44:44,239 --> 00:44:46,560
Speaker 5: she couldn't be there, and I just always remember pacing

1050
00:44:46,640 --> 00:44:49,279
Speaker 5: up and down the hallway for like three hours on

1051
00:44:49,560 --> 00:44:51,160
Speaker 5: and in a carry out.

1052
00:44:51,760 --> 00:44:55,480
Speaker 3: She's screaming, I'm screaming, we're both crying. I'm like, fuck this,

1053
00:44:56,000 --> 00:44:59,759
Speaker 3: like shut up, and those moments just.

1054
00:45:00,440 --> 00:45:02,799
Speaker 2: Yeah, my first one was exactly the same as that. Yeah,

1055
00:45:02,800 --> 00:45:06,279
Speaker 2: So the silent reflex I fully resonated with that. You go,

1056
00:45:07,040 --> 00:45:09,880
Speaker 2: you're all screaming at each other for hours trying to

1057
00:45:09,880 --> 00:45:10,680
Speaker 2: get them to sleep, and and.

1058
00:45:10,640 --> 00:45:12,960
Speaker 4: It's like they're asleep forty minutes later, they're back up.

1059
00:45:13,080 --> 00:45:16,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, they're hungry, and we're ready to again twenty four hours.

1060
00:45:16,400 --> 00:45:17,319
Speaker 3: It's heavy hate.

1061
00:45:18,800 --> 00:45:21,080
Speaker 1: How do you deal with the guilt when you have

1062
00:45:21,200 --> 00:45:24,120
Speaker 1: those moments? Because similar, Lola was the same and we

1063
00:45:24,200 --> 00:45:27,200
Speaker 1: had a couple of scares with her, and you want

1064
00:45:27,239 --> 00:45:29,719
Speaker 1: to love this child more than anything, but you're just

1065
00:45:29,840 --> 00:45:33,400
Speaker 1: so exhausted and so tired. You're also so frustrated at

1066
00:45:33,440 --> 00:45:34,960
Speaker 1: them and it's not their fault. But then when you

1067
00:45:35,040 --> 00:45:37,760
Speaker 1: have those moments frustration and you think, fuck, I should

1068
00:45:37,800 --> 00:45:40,800
Speaker 1: be yeah, I should be loving this again, yeah, and

1069
00:45:40,920 --> 00:45:43,080
Speaker 1: you're not, Like, how do you deal with those situations?

1070
00:45:45,000 --> 00:45:47,640
Speaker 3: The sleep deprivation is the worst.

1071
00:45:47,760 --> 00:45:50,160
Speaker 5: And I think if you if you're one of those

1072
00:45:50,200 --> 00:45:53,080
Speaker 5: people that does happen to have like that chemical imbalance

1073
00:45:53,200 --> 00:45:55,160
Speaker 5: after you have a baby and you do go through

1074
00:45:55,200 --> 00:46:01,080
Speaker 5: the post partum depression thing that like, I imagine how

1075
00:46:01,480 --> 00:46:04,880
Speaker 5: you could fucking spial because if you had sleep deprivation

1076
00:46:05,000 --> 00:46:06,759
Speaker 5: along with that, you'd just.

1077
00:46:06,840 --> 00:46:10,320
Speaker 3: Be like I hate this kid. That is the worst

1078
00:46:10,400 --> 00:46:12,680
Speaker 3: thing to say, like that that, thank God was not me.

1079
00:46:14,400 --> 00:46:17,279
Speaker 1: For people who don't have kids, the reality is you

1080
00:46:17,360 --> 00:46:18,480
Speaker 1: have moments of resentment.

1081
00:46:18,719 --> 00:46:23,000
Speaker 4: Yes, you can't all the time like you do.

1082
00:46:23,320 --> 00:46:26,000
Speaker 2: Like you might be like I fuck this, fuck this,

1083
00:46:26,400 --> 00:46:28,880
Speaker 2: Like you could be in the worst mood and be

1084
00:46:29,000 --> 00:46:32,240
Speaker 2: so resentful towards them. You can feel really really guilty

1085
00:46:32,280 --> 00:46:34,319
Speaker 2: for a moment, but there you find you you find

1086
00:46:34,360 --> 00:46:36,200
Speaker 2: your ways to get over it and love them.

1087
00:46:36,480 --> 00:46:37,640
Speaker 4: Like like you do the whole.

1088
00:46:37,760 --> 00:46:41,239
Speaker 5: Yes, And I think I had in my head, I

1089
00:46:41,280 --> 00:46:43,520
Speaker 5: don't know, like if she was screaming her head off

1090
00:46:43,560 --> 00:46:46,239
Speaker 5: and I was really like freaking hadn't slept in like

1091
00:46:46,320 --> 00:46:47,760
Speaker 5: a week, I'd.

1092
00:46:47,640 --> 00:46:50,080
Speaker 3: Just lash out and be like shut the fuck up

1093
00:46:51,760 --> 00:46:55,600
Speaker 3: and then scream at this tiny, innocent little egg. And

1094
00:46:56,160 --> 00:46:58,040
Speaker 3: they obviously have no idea what I'm saying, So I

1095
00:46:58,160 --> 00:47:00,080
Speaker 3: was like, okay, not really learning.

1096
00:47:01,680 --> 00:47:05,800
Speaker 5: They're killed You're just like, oh my god, they're so innocent,

1097
00:47:05,880 --> 00:47:07,960
Speaker 5: and I've just yelled at this tiny thing, Like is

1098
00:47:08,000 --> 00:47:10,400
Speaker 5: that going to like, you know, it's not really going

1099
00:47:10,440 --> 00:47:13,000
Speaker 5: to affect their life, but you're like, shit, but even now,

1100
00:47:13,360 --> 00:47:17,680
Speaker 5: like I definitely am pretty crazy, but I will honestly,

1101
00:47:17,719 --> 00:47:20,239
Speaker 5: I do feel guilty sometimes, and I'm when I'm too

1102
00:47:20,320 --> 00:47:23,520
Speaker 5: busy or not super present, and you know, I've picked

1103
00:47:23,600 --> 00:47:25,200
Speaker 5: up from daycare and I've got a million other things

1104
00:47:25,239 --> 00:47:26,960
Speaker 5: on my mind rather than being in their car and

1105
00:47:27,040 --> 00:47:27,960
Speaker 5: going Minnie.

1106
00:47:27,680 --> 00:47:29,279
Speaker 3: How is your day and what did you get up

1107
00:47:29,320 --> 00:47:30,319
Speaker 3: to and what did you draw today?

1108
00:47:30,320 --> 00:47:32,399
Speaker 5: And did you play in the sand and what did

1109
00:47:32,480 --> 00:47:35,719
Speaker 5: you bloody learn and dadda, Like if I'm not doing that,

1110
00:47:36,040 --> 00:47:38,480
Speaker 5: or if I'm just a bit like smitty shut up

1111
00:47:38,520 --> 00:47:41,120
Speaker 5: like a mummy's talking, or you know, just like quickly

1112
00:47:41,160 --> 00:47:43,440
Speaker 5: trying to rush through the bath and the bed and

1113
00:47:43,520 --> 00:47:45,799
Speaker 5: the dinner and all that, and then you finally chuck

1114
00:47:45,840 --> 00:47:47,480
Speaker 5: them in bed and you're like, fuck, thank god, I

1115
00:47:47,560 --> 00:47:49,799
Speaker 5: can do me Now. I'm like, oh, I don't even

1116
00:47:49,840 --> 00:47:51,840
Speaker 5: know if I really interacted with her enough to savo

1117
00:47:52,000 --> 00:47:52,239
Speaker 5: like that.

1118
00:47:52,520 --> 00:47:53,520
Speaker 3: Shit feels guilty.

1119
00:47:54,400 --> 00:47:59,000
Speaker 5: But I look at my friends who have a partner,

1120
00:47:59,280 --> 00:48:01,960
Speaker 5: and it's so much easier to just be like that

1121
00:48:02,280 --> 00:48:05,160
Speaker 5: tiny bit stoke, don't have that bit more energy when

1122
00:48:05,200 --> 00:48:07,200
Speaker 5: you're like, hey, can you do bath in bed?

1123
00:48:07,600 --> 00:48:09,200
Speaker 3: And then I'll cook for us and then we can

1124
00:48:09,239 --> 00:48:10,960
Speaker 3: all kind of come together and have that and that.

1125
00:48:11,080 --> 00:48:13,720
Speaker 5: Are like I feel like I'm always rushing and chasing

1126
00:48:13,800 --> 00:48:17,120
Speaker 5: my tail and that, Like I struggle with that, and

1127
00:48:17,160 --> 00:48:21,200
Speaker 5: I do feel guilty about that a lot, but I.

1128
00:48:21,320 --> 00:48:23,960
Speaker 3: Do also kind of I mean, when I say it

1129
00:48:23,960 --> 00:48:24,840
Speaker 3: out loud, I'm kind.

1130
00:48:24,680 --> 00:48:27,000
Speaker 5: Of like, I also do feel like, Okay, I should

1131
00:48:27,040 --> 00:48:29,239
Speaker 5: be kind of proud because which she's two and a half,

1132
00:48:29,320 --> 00:48:30,840
Speaker 5: she's actually really healthy and thriving.

1133
00:48:31,480 --> 00:48:33,799
Speaker 3: We've moved, We've done so fucking much.

1134
00:48:33,960 --> 00:48:37,920
Speaker 1: I was going to say, you should be so fucking proud.

1135
00:48:38,520 --> 00:48:38,840
Speaker 3: Thank you.

1136
00:48:39,239 --> 00:48:41,359
Speaker 1: It's like parenting is hard.

1137
00:48:41,440 --> 00:48:41,839
Speaker 4: It's tough.

1138
00:48:42,160 --> 00:48:45,720
Speaker 1: It's hard. Imagine it and a team and this periods

1139
00:48:45,719 --> 00:48:49,080
Speaker 1: where Laura will go away for a weekend and at

1140
00:48:49,120 --> 00:48:51,360
Speaker 1: the end of that, I'm like, I'm checked out. You know,

1141
00:48:51,440 --> 00:48:55,320
Speaker 1: you don't get that reprieve. You're like, yeah, running constantly,

1142
00:48:55,440 --> 00:48:58,080
Speaker 1: and not only that, but then you're working so much

1143
00:48:58,120 --> 00:49:00,839
Speaker 1: as well. You've got podcasts, how you just got announces

1144
00:49:00,880 --> 00:49:04,320
Speaker 1: a cover girl first in Australia. Shout out and thank you.

1145
00:49:04,480 --> 00:49:05,200
Speaker 3: It's so crazy.

1146
00:49:06,040 --> 00:49:08,719
Speaker 1: How are you finding balancing everything at the moment? You

1147
00:49:08,800 --> 00:49:09,880
Speaker 1: got a million things going on?

1148
00:49:10,120 --> 00:49:12,000
Speaker 3: Yes, well I just chucked her in for another day

1149
00:49:12,000 --> 00:49:13,839
Speaker 3: at daycare. Daycare is the best thing ever.

1150
00:49:15,600 --> 00:49:18,120
Speaker 5: But yeah, I honestly I get a taste of what

1151
00:49:18,160 --> 00:49:19,799
Speaker 5: it would be like to be in a relationship because

1152
00:49:19,800 --> 00:49:22,000
Speaker 5: when Chloe and Fisher are home, they live three doors

1153
00:49:22,080 --> 00:49:24,960
Speaker 5: down the road, and she knows my schedule.

1154
00:49:25,040 --> 00:49:27,080
Speaker 3: She actually tracks me on fucking fine and.

1155
00:49:28,960 --> 00:49:32,200
Speaker 5: She tracks me. She knows my calendar. She'll literally be like, hey,

1156
00:49:32,360 --> 00:49:34,359
Speaker 5: it's nearly four pm. I can see that you're still

1157
00:49:34,600 --> 00:49:38,239
Speaker 5: fucking in some meeting up at Miami. Can I Can

1158
00:49:38,280 --> 00:49:40,160
Speaker 5: I go pick Mini up now and then? And then

1159
00:49:40,400 --> 00:49:42,400
Speaker 5: I'll be like, yeah, bloody, go for it. She'll go

1160
00:49:42,480 --> 00:49:45,200
Speaker 5: get Minnie. I'll come back and find her bathed and fed,

1161
00:49:45,760 --> 00:49:47,719
Speaker 5: and then she's got dinner for me, and I'm like,

1162
00:49:47,920 --> 00:49:48,600
Speaker 5: oh my god.

1163
00:49:48,680 --> 00:49:51,480
Speaker 3: So I get a taste of how good and I

1164
00:49:51,560 --> 00:49:51,800
Speaker 3: get it.

1165
00:49:51,880 --> 00:49:54,000
Speaker 5: I get so lucky with them, like I get I

1166
00:49:54,080 --> 00:49:56,120
Speaker 5: get a taste of how good and easy it is,

1167
00:49:56,160 --> 00:49:57,680
Speaker 5: and I get to really reap that when they're home,

1168
00:49:57,760 --> 00:50:00,200
Speaker 5: I'm like, fuck, you're on like you.

1169
00:50:00,760 --> 00:50:01,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know.

1170
00:50:01,880 --> 00:50:05,200
Speaker 5: But then and that makes me appreciate my village and

1171
00:50:05,520 --> 00:50:07,319
Speaker 5: I feel so lucky. So I just lap that up

1172
00:50:07,320 --> 00:50:08,800
Speaker 5: when I can, and then when I can't, I just

1173
00:50:08,920 --> 00:50:10,560
Speaker 5: chase my tail and I get on without my brother

1174
00:50:10,719 --> 00:50:11,160
Speaker 5: and my mom.

1175
00:50:11,239 --> 00:50:11,880
Speaker 3: They're awesome.

1176
00:50:12,360 --> 00:50:13,799
Speaker 5: So I have people that I can call when I'm

1177
00:50:13,800 --> 00:50:16,719
Speaker 5: really struggling. But yeah, it's a juggle. Like, it's such

1178
00:50:16,719 --> 00:50:18,880
Speaker 5: a juggle. You just have to not that good at

1179
00:50:18,920 --> 00:50:20,759
Speaker 5: thinking ahead, but you do have to think ahead and

1180
00:50:20,840 --> 00:50:22,719
Speaker 5: be like, fuck, got X, Y and Z, How am

1181
00:50:22,760 --> 00:50:24,239
Speaker 5: I going to figure out who's picking her up?

1182
00:50:24,239 --> 00:50:24,400
Speaker 3: And what?

1183
00:50:25,280 --> 00:50:27,360
Speaker 4: So many logistical things you got to worry and.

1184
00:50:27,440 --> 00:50:28,919
Speaker 3: We like same with you guys.

1185
00:50:29,080 --> 00:50:32,160
Speaker 5: I'm always traveling for work and flying here and flying there,

1186
00:50:32,239 --> 00:50:34,359
Speaker 5: and like I, I most of the trying to try

1187
00:50:34,440 --> 00:50:36,239
Speaker 5: and figure out how to pull her out of Kindy

1188
00:50:36,320 --> 00:50:38,120
Speaker 5: so she can come because I actually miss her, and

1189
00:50:38,200 --> 00:50:42,640
Speaker 5: then again feel really guilty if I'm going away, you know,

1190
00:50:43,040 --> 00:50:45,279
Speaker 5: for week a weekend for some job and then she's

1191
00:50:45,320 --> 00:50:47,440
Speaker 5: in KINDI a week, Like I'm just like, am I

1192
00:50:47,480 --> 00:50:48,560
Speaker 5: ever going to see this kid?

1193
00:50:49,360 --> 00:50:53,319
Speaker 3: You know? So it is such a juggle, And yeah,

1194
00:50:53,800 --> 00:50:54,080
Speaker 3: you just.

1195
00:50:54,120 --> 00:50:55,400
Speaker 4: Got to fully understand that.

1196
00:50:55,560 --> 00:50:59,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, like the you're sort of trying to do your

1197
00:51:00,160 --> 00:51:02,279
Speaker 2: life as well, but then it's like that you're kind

1198
00:51:02,320 --> 00:51:05,480
Speaker 2: of like their whole life. And it's like sometimes you

1199
00:51:05,520 --> 00:51:08,360
Speaker 2: can feel like if you dismissed them a little bit

1200
00:51:08,440 --> 00:51:11,799
Speaker 2: early or just too quickly, just because you're caught up

1201
00:51:11,840 --> 00:51:14,440
Speaker 2: in your world. But like I said, you're their whole world.

1202
00:51:14,480 --> 00:51:17,680
Speaker 2: They're waiting for you to respond sometimes if.

1203
00:51:17,560 --> 00:51:20,919
Speaker 1: It makes you feel any better. So many other parents

1204
00:51:20,960 --> 00:51:23,359
Speaker 1: are going through the same thing. Wrapping the Gold Coast

1205
00:51:23,480 --> 00:51:26,680
Speaker 1: right now. I'm sleeping up here tomorrow morning. Is those

1206
00:51:26,760 --> 00:51:29,160
Speaker 1: days are a daddy door to day, which I'll miss

1207
00:51:29,360 --> 00:51:32,920
Speaker 1: because I'm up here. So those internal thoughts in the

1208
00:51:33,000 --> 00:51:35,640
Speaker 1: good that you've got, like we've all got in.

1209
00:51:35,719 --> 00:51:37,239
Speaker 4: Some capacity, we've all got it.

1210
00:51:37,320 --> 00:51:40,200
Speaker 2: It's kind of like you know, your situations unique with

1211
00:51:40,360 --> 00:51:42,800
Speaker 2: what you know, you and your kid alike, but everyone's

1212
00:51:42,840 --> 00:51:45,680
Speaker 2: got that something that they go I should have maybe

1213
00:51:45,800 --> 00:51:48,200
Speaker 2: not said that, or I should have maybe spent that

1214
00:51:48,320 --> 00:51:51,359
Speaker 2: little bit of extra time instead of sat and doom

1215
00:51:51,440 --> 00:51:53,400
Speaker 2: scrolled for that fifteen minutes.

1216
00:51:56,640 --> 00:52:01,399
Speaker 5: Dooom scrolling watching some other fucking kid on some other

1217
00:52:01,520 --> 00:52:09,120
Speaker 5: kid on tiktog instead of your own stupid look. But yeah,

1218
00:52:09,120 --> 00:52:12,719
Speaker 5: it's true. At Mini's KINDI there's another kid that also

1219
00:52:12,800 --> 00:52:15,120
Speaker 5: doesn't have a dad, and well she had a sperm

1220
00:52:15,200 --> 00:52:18,040
Speaker 5: don a situation and such a beautiful little girl. And

1221
00:52:18,239 --> 00:52:21,200
Speaker 5: I respect that mum so much because she works her

1222
00:52:21,320 --> 00:52:25,200
Speaker 5: us off. She works full time, and I'm like, she

1223
00:52:25,600 --> 00:52:28,400
Speaker 5: gives me like that validation. I'm like, fuck, yr, I

1224
00:52:28,520 --> 00:52:31,640
Speaker 5: never imagine i'd be working this much, yeah and doing

1225
00:52:31,719 --> 00:52:33,520
Speaker 5: not like yeah, all on my own to be able

1226
00:52:33,560 --> 00:52:34,520
Speaker 5: to afford what we can do.

1227
00:52:34,840 --> 00:52:37,920
Speaker 2: And she would think the same as what you think

1228
00:52:37,920 --> 00:52:41,360
Speaker 2: about her, like we think about you like pride, like

1229
00:52:42,040 --> 00:52:42,520
Speaker 2: far out.

1230
00:52:42,560 --> 00:52:44,480
Speaker 4: It's hard and she knows that. So it's good that

1231
00:52:44,560 --> 00:52:47,759
Speaker 4: you've got You've got that sense that you feel, you know,

1232
00:52:47,920 --> 00:52:49,840
Speaker 4: proud of what she does. She would feel exactly the

1233
00:52:49,880 --> 00:52:51,120
Speaker 4: same about you, I guarantee you.

1234
00:52:51,320 --> 00:52:54,520
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, Well hopefully we've both got each other.

1235
00:52:56,320 --> 00:52:58,080
Speaker 5: And it's the thing because sometimes I'm like, I need

1236
00:52:58,160 --> 00:52:59,800
Speaker 5: to stop saying yes to so much work because I

1237
00:52:59,880 --> 00:53:01,840
Speaker 5: need to have more time for me. But then I'm like,

1238
00:53:02,040 --> 00:53:03,840
Speaker 5: there's only one income here, and I got to do it,

1239
00:53:04,000 --> 00:53:07,799
Speaker 5: and it'll like you know, yeah, kind of.

1240
00:53:08,280 --> 00:53:09,120
Speaker 3: Just got to get on with it.

1241
00:53:09,360 --> 00:53:11,360
Speaker 1: I feel like one of the most common questions that

1242
00:53:11,480 --> 00:53:14,120
Speaker 1: must get thrown it you are are you going to

1243
00:53:14,160 --> 00:53:16,759
Speaker 1: have another baby? Are you ready to start dating again?

1244
00:53:17,160 --> 00:53:19,520
Speaker 1: Be honest? How annoying is it to have that question

1245
00:53:19,640 --> 00:53:20,000
Speaker 1: thrown at you?

1246
00:53:20,520 --> 00:53:21,400
Speaker 3: Yeah? I feel like.

1247
00:53:23,760 --> 00:53:26,520
Speaker 5: I think I used to find it really annoying because

1248
00:53:26,560 --> 00:53:29,719
Speaker 5: I was like or like, I don't want to say

1249
00:53:29,920 --> 00:53:32,839
Speaker 5: I thought it was rude, but I wasn't. My head

1250
00:53:32,920 --> 00:53:35,319
Speaker 5: wasn't there, so I was like, what the fuck, I'm

1251
00:53:35,560 --> 00:53:37,759
Speaker 5: just like I'm pregnant, or I've just had mini like

1252
00:53:38,320 --> 00:53:40,680
Speaker 5: what the hell, like as if I'm going to find

1253
00:53:40,719 --> 00:53:41,160
Speaker 5: someone now?

1254
00:53:41,280 --> 00:53:43,120
Speaker 3: And like I felt pressure too.

1255
00:53:43,400 --> 00:53:45,600
Speaker 5: I was like, is that what I'm like? Am I

1256
00:53:45,760 --> 00:53:47,799
Speaker 5: just moving to slow? Should I already be with someone?

1257
00:53:47,920 --> 00:53:51,600
Speaker 5: Like I feel like I can't, like you know, and

1258
00:53:52,040 --> 00:53:55,520
Speaker 5: or I had other friends that they lost their partners too,

1259
00:53:55,600 --> 00:53:57,600
Speaker 5: and I met them on like line and they already

1260
00:53:57,600 --> 00:54:00,520
Speaker 5: had other boyfriends and stuff. Their circumstance was different. Maybe

1261
00:54:00,520 --> 00:54:02,480
Speaker 5: they weren't they weren't having a baby or whatever. But

1262
00:54:02,600 --> 00:54:04,960
Speaker 5: I was like, holy shit, like good power to them,

1263
00:54:05,040 --> 00:54:06,840
Speaker 5: Like fucking oath, that would be so hard to do

1264
00:54:07,200 --> 00:54:08,680
Speaker 5: and eyes are on you.

1265
00:54:08,920 --> 00:54:10,080
Speaker 3: People are going holy shit.

1266
00:54:10,120 --> 00:54:11,840
Speaker 5: That was too soon or that wasn't soon enough for

1267
00:54:12,239 --> 00:54:15,640
Speaker 5: they're comparing the guys and like passing judgment and shit,

1268
00:54:15,719 --> 00:54:16,920
Speaker 5: and I was like, oh, I don't want that.

1269
00:54:17,640 --> 00:54:19,520
Speaker 3: And I was like maybe that's something I just keep

1270
00:54:19,560 --> 00:54:20,560
Speaker 3: super private and stuff.

1271
00:54:20,880 --> 00:54:24,600
Speaker 5: But now I'm like actually excited about like what's to come.

1272
00:54:24,920 --> 00:54:28,319
Speaker 5: And I'm like that actually excites me now. So now

1273
00:54:28,360 --> 00:54:30,799
Speaker 5: when people ask, I'm like, oh my god, I want

1274
00:54:30,840 --> 00:54:33,000
Speaker 5: to know too, what are we going to do? It's

1275
00:54:33,080 --> 00:54:36,279
Speaker 5: like who's it going to be? Like just be a better,

1276
00:54:36,320 --> 00:54:38,440
Speaker 5: be a legend. And I just can't wait to find

1277
00:54:38,480 --> 00:54:40,360
Speaker 5: someone that I just fucking love and get along with

1278
00:54:40,680 --> 00:54:46,720
Speaker 5: and we just have fun and mini loves and like, yeah.

1279
00:54:47,280 --> 00:54:49,240
Speaker 1: It's the first time that we've met. But it's also

1280
00:54:49,400 --> 00:54:53,600
Speaker 1: weird how invested I am in your life. I'm completely honest.

1281
00:54:53,600 --> 00:54:56,000
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah from the sidelines, like, O.

1282
00:54:57,600 --> 00:55:00,399
Speaker 3: Love you, Maddie. And I love Laura too. She's boody best.

1283
00:55:00,440 --> 00:55:01,680
Speaker 3: As soon as I met her, I was like, I

1284
00:55:02,160 --> 00:55:05,719
Speaker 3: fucking love you. She's one of one and the.

1285
00:55:05,760 --> 00:55:09,920
Speaker 1: Same and love talking to Elidie. Oh, I was like,

1286
00:55:10,160 --> 00:55:13,840
Speaker 1: she wasn't wrong. We do like to end on one

1287
00:55:13,960 --> 00:55:16,240
Speaker 1: question I have forgotten to ask it a few times,

1288
00:55:16,320 --> 00:55:19,440
Speaker 1: But I'm not going to figure out, given you're fired,

1289
00:55:20,480 --> 00:55:22,839
Speaker 1: when Minnie is all grown up and she's no longer

1290
00:55:22,920 --> 00:55:27,000
Speaker 1: living with you at home, what would be one thing

1291
00:55:27,160 --> 00:55:28,800
Speaker 1: or a few things that you would want her to

1292
00:55:28,840 --> 00:55:30,680
Speaker 1: remember about the house that she grew up in.

1293
00:55:31,760 --> 00:55:32,640
Speaker 3: That's a cool question.

1294
00:55:34,440 --> 00:55:38,520
Speaker 5: Well, I actually have this fear that she's going to

1295
00:55:38,600 --> 00:55:41,440
Speaker 5: forget about the house that Chump and I kind of

1296
00:55:41,719 --> 00:55:43,880
Speaker 5: made our home together that I just moved from.

1297
00:55:43,960 --> 00:55:45,239
Speaker 3: So if you had to come up last week, that's

1298
00:55:45,239 --> 00:55:45,920
Speaker 3: where we would have been.

1299
00:55:46,560 --> 00:55:49,239
Speaker 5: And because it's so special to me, and it's such

1300
00:55:49,239 --> 00:55:51,000
Speaker 5: a sick house and I just love it, and she

1301
00:55:51,200 --> 00:55:53,120
Speaker 5: had so much fun there, and I've got so many

1302
00:55:53,200 --> 00:55:57,719
Speaker 5: memories and amazing videos there, and I just hope that

1303
00:55:57,800 --> 00:55:59,279
Speaker 5: she remembers that. But she's two and a half, so

1304
00:55:59,360 --> 00:56:01,520
Speaker 5: she probably won't. But I just have in my like

1305
00:56:01,640 --> 00:56:03,680
Speaker 5: little thing that we're going to keep driving past that

1306
00:56:03,760 --> 00:56:05,440
Speaker 5: street and I'm gonna be like, that's our first house.

1307
00:56:05,520 --> 00:56:06,480
Speaker 5: That's our first house, and.

1308
00:56:06,520 --> 00:56:08,759
Speaker 3: She's gonna be like yeah, da da and always feel

1309
00:56:08,800 --> 00:56:09,479
Speaker 3: like that's home.

1310
00:56:10,040 --> 00:56:13,920
Speaker 5: But I'm now in this little flat and for like

1311
00:56:14,000 --> 00:56:15,520
Speaker 5: a month or two, and then I'm going to move

1312
00:56:15,520 --> 00:56:18,040
Speaker 5: into this other house, and I think, like Rummy and

1313
00:56:18,120 --> 00:56:19,920
Speaker 5: I are is home to Minnie.

1314
00:56:19,680 --> 00:56:21,399
Speaker 3: And she's like obsessed with the dog.

1315
00:56:21,640 --> 00:56:24,200
Speaker 5: She's unfortunately got to be a mummy's girl because she

1316
00:56:24,239 --> 00:56:26,759
Speaker 5: doesn't have a dad, and well a dads here.

1317
00:56:27,239 --> 00:56:31,719
Speaker 3: And I just think that what she I hope that

1318
00:56:31,840 --> 00:56:36,920
Speaker 3: she remembers from home is just yummy food, warm cuddles.

1319
00:56:37,280 --> 00:56:39,520
Speaker 5: Energy, like good welcoming energy, like come and be who

1320
00:56:39,600 --> 00:56:41,920
Speaker 5: you want here, like this is your safe place and

1321
00:56:41,960 --> 00:56:45,760
Speaker 5: no matter where we are, Like my dad lived in Sydney.

1322
00:56:45,840 --> 00:56:47,480
Speaker 3: He passed away a year after Chump died.

1323
00:56:47,600 --> 00:56:49,960
Speaker 5: But me and Chump like say, if we had an

1324
00:56:49,960 --> 00:56:52,160
Speaker 5: engagement party down there or whatever, I'd never tell my

1325
00:56:52,239 --> 00:56:54,440
Speaker 5: dad we were going. I just like me and Chump

1326
00:56:54,480 --> 00:56:56,040
Speaker 5: would fly down or drive down or whatever, and we'd

1327
00:56:56,120 --> 00:56:58,920
Speaker 5: rock up at Dad's with all our suitcases and I'd

1328
00:56:58,960 --> 00:57:01,359
Speaker 5: just be like like run into his house. My dad

1329
00:57:01,560 --> 00:57:02,840
Speaker 5: just scare the shit out of him, and he'd be

1330
00:57:02,840 --> 00:57:04,719
Speaker 5: like fuck, yeah, Ellie, like you're here, come my god,

1331
00:57:05,200 --> 00:57:07,960
Speaker 5: and we'd dump our bags and be like, Dad just

1332
00:57:08,000 --> 00:57:09,680
Speaker 5: got to go to this party quickly, we're running late,

1333
00:57:09,920 --> 00:57:12,440
Speaker 5: run out the door, and he'd just like.

1334
00:57:12,480 --> 00:57:13,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, you cool, do whatever you need to do.

1335
00:57:14,040 --> 00:57:17,360
Speaker 5: Like he was just so cruisy. He didn't expect anything.

1336
00:57:17,600 --> 00:57:19,680
Speaker 5: He was just like, fuck, I'm so glad you can

1337
00:57:19,760 --> 00:57:20,920
Speaker 5: rock up with your bags. You don't even need to

1338
00:57:20,960 --> 00:57:21,160
Speaker 5: tell me.

1339
00:57:21,240 --> 00:57:22,640
Speaker 3: And of course you know this is your home and

1340
00:57:22,680 --> 00:57:23,520
Speaker 3: you're welcome.

1341
00:57:23,280 --> 00:57:25,520
Speaker 5: And dadda and Trump was always like I can't believe

1342
00:57:25,560 --> 00:57:29,160
Speaker 5: you can just like fucking lob up, say hardy your

1343
00:57:29,200 --> 00:57:32,000
Speaker 5: dad for two seconds, just hug him and walk back

1344
00:57:32,040 --> 00:57:33,520
Speaker 5: out the door and not have to sit there and

1345
00:57:33,600 --> 00:57:36,320
Speaker 5: have tea and chats for hours on end. And he's

1346
00:57:36,360 --> 00:57:38,480
Speaker 5: happy with that. And then you know, go to this

1347
00:57:38,600 --> 00:57:40,400
Speaker 5: party and then come back and then we'll have a big,

1348
00:57:40,640 --> 00:57:41,960
Speaker 5: fat day with dad tomorrow.

1349
00:57:42,000 --> 00:57:43,959
Speaker 3: But like he was just so cruisy and just wanted

1350
00:57:44,040 --> 00:57:45,960
Speaker 3: us to just do us and be happy.

1351
00:57:46,120 --> 00:57:48,600
Speaker 5: And sometimes I'd go to my dad's and literally just

1352
00:57:48,680 --> 00:57:50,720
Speaker 5: be like, Dad, I just needed to get away and

1353
00:57:50,840 --> 00:57:51,800
Speaker 5: have a nap or something.

1354
00:57:51,840 --> 00:57:53,560
Speaker 3: And I'd fucking just lie on his couch and don't

1355
00:57:53,560 --> 00:57:54,080
Speaker 3: even talk.

1356
00:57:53,920 --> 00:57:56,640
Speaker 5: To him and sleep, And like, I just always felt

1357
00:57:57,160 --> 00:58:00,240
Speaker 5: so comfortable going to Dad's and that was my happy

1358
00:58:00,280 --> 00:58:02,720
Speaker 5: place and my place where I didn't have to be anything.

1359
00:58:02,760 --> 00:58:04,320
Speaker 5: I didn't have to put on a fucking show or

1360
00:58:05,000 --> 00:58:07,880
Speaker 5: you know, be all like, hey, daddy into the you know,

1361
00:58:08,120 --> 00:58:09,520
Speaker 5: like I didn't have to suck up to my dad

1362
00:58:09,560 --> 00:58:09,800
Speaker 5: at all.

1363
00:58:09,880 --> 00:58:11,880
Speaker 3: Like he was just like stoked for me to just

1364
00:58:11,960 --> 00:58:13,800
Speaker 3: go and be me. And that's what I want. That

1365
00:58:13,920 --> 00:58:14,800
Speaker 3: was the longest answer ever.

1366
00:58:14,960 --> 00:58:15,320
Speaker 4: That's good.

1367
00:58:17,280 --> 00:58:18,760
Speaker 3: That's what I want for me. I don't want her

1368
00:58:18,800 --> 00:58:19,320
Speaker 3: to think.

1369
00:58:19,160 --> 00:58:21,200
Speaker 5: When she comes back with her fucking boyfriends or whatever

1370
00:58:21,280 --> 00:58:24,280
Speaker 5: and has to visit mom's hay house. I don't want

1371
00:58:24,320 --> 00:58:26,440
Speaker 5: her to think she has to, like, you know, be

1372
00:58:26,600 --> 00:58:28,760
Speaker 5: on her best behavior or put on some face or

1373
00:58:28,840 --> 00:58:29,960
Speaker 5: be like, you know.

1374
00:58:30,880 --> 00:58:32,960
Speaker 3: It's still like that. I love her and I'm proud

1375
00:58:33,000 --> 00:58:34,240
Speaker 3: of her no matter what she's doing.

1376
00:58:34,320 --> 00:58:36,720
Speaker 5: And I felt that so much from my dad. I

1377
00:58:36,800 --> 00:58:39,520
Speaker 5: didn't have to I could go and look so disheveled

1378
00:58:39,520 --> 00:58:42,120
Speaker 5: and hungover and be stewing, and my dad would be

1379
00:58:42,240 --> 00:58:43,200
Speaker 5: so frothing.

1380
00:58:42,920 --> 00:58:44,200
Speaker 3: To see me and take me in.

1381
00:58:44,320 --> 00:58:45,400
Speaker 4: And that's amazing.

1382
00:58:45,600 --> 00:58:48,720
Speaker 3: You know, some parents are a bit judgy, ah yeah yeah,

1383
00:58:48,760 --> 00:58:50,160
Speaker 3: and not looking at mine.

1384
00:58:53,040 --> 00:58:53,960
Speaker 1: A bloody delight.

1385
00:58:54,080 --> 00:58:56,120
Speaker 4: Absolutely, And thank you for having us.

1386
00:58:56,200 --> 00:58:58,960
Speaker 1: We've crashed into your floor, your living room, yeah, so

1387
00:58:59,160 --> 00:58:59,880
Speaker 1: thank you for having that.

1388
00:59:00,000 --> 00:59:01,080
Speaker 4: Thanks thanks so much.

1389
00:59:01,240 --> 00:59:03,280
Speaker 3: I'm not going to be able to get out, it's

1390
00:59:03,280 --> 00:59:04,080
Speaker 3: got to break them back.

1391
00:59:04,000 --> 00:59:06,120
Speaker 4: In your Matt's going to have to lift me out.

1392
00:59:06,240 --> 00:59:08,320
Speaker 4: But it's been a pleasure. Thank you so much for

1393
00:59:08,360 --> 00:59:10,840
Speaker 4: having us in your house and welcoming us into your world.

1394
00:59:11,120 --> 00:59:13,000
Speaker 3: Thanks so much, guys for having me. It's been such

1395
00:59:13,000 --> 00:59:13,480
Speaker 3: a good chat.

1396
00:59:17,360 --> 00:59:19,080
Speaker 4: I did need to wash my hands at the end

1397
00:59:19,120 --> 00:59:19,280
Speaker 4: of that.

1398
00:59:19,600 --> 00:59:23,480
Speaker 1: It's the first time I've done a podcast where I've

1399
00:59:23,520 --> 00:59:25,760
Speaker 1: had to deal with an animal. Came one to me

1400
00:59:26,040 --> 00:59:28,320
Speaker 1: strong at the start, talking about a dog here, and

1401
00:59:28,440 --> 00:59:31,400
Speaker 1: then quickly made its way over to ash and I'd

1402
00:59:31,440 --> 00:59:34,040
Speaker 1: like a glands over it. You making out with a dog.

1403
00:59:34,280 --> 00:59:36,240
Speaker 4: I don't mind a good tongue lashes on the dog.

1404
00:59:37,360 --> 00:59:40,120
Speaker 1: And shout out to elid for letting us crash into

1405
00:59:40,200 --> 00:59:40,600
Speaker 1: a house.

1406
00:59:40,840 --> 00:59:42,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, I did get stuck on the floor. When you

1407
00:59:42,800 --> 00:59:45,120
Speaker 2: see the socials of this, we filmed it while sitting

1408
00:59:45,160 --> 00:59:47,800
Speaker 2: on the floor. I've got a bad knee and someone had.

1409
00:59:47,720 --> 00:59:48,240
Speaker 6: To help me out.

1410
00:59:48,640 --> 00:59:51,360
Speaker 1: Elidie was like, you, guys might be a bit uncomfortable

1411
00:59:51,400 --> 00:59:53,240
Speaker 1: because we record for like an hour and a bit

1412
00:59:53,760 --> 00:59:55,600
Speaker 1: and we're both going no, no, no, it's fine, it's fine.

1413
00:59:55,840 --> 00:59:58,440
Speaker 1: Forty five minutes in Pins and Needles, couldn't feel the

1414
00:59:58,480 --> 00:59:59,240
Speaker 1: left side of my body.

1415
00:59:59,280 --> 01:00:01,120
Speaker 4: I realized my midway through that.

1416
01:00:02,120 --> 01:00:05,040
Speaker 1: Heyvid, if you've enjoyed this episode, we would love it

1417
01:00:05,600 --> 01:00:10,600
Speaker 1: if you subscribe, shared, or reviewed on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.

1418
01:00:10,920 --> 01:00:13,360
Speaker 2: And if you have any other parents you want Matt

1419
01:00:13,440 --> 01:00:15,240
Speaker 2: and I to interview, We'll try our best.

1420
01:00:15,920 --> 01:00:17,320
Speaker 4: We will promise you that.

1421
01:00:18,600 --> 01:00:21,479
Speaker 2: So you can email us at hello at two Doting

1422
01:00:21,520 --> 01:00:23,240
Speaker 2: Dads dot com, or you can dms at the two

1423
01:00:23,280 --> 01:00:26,840
Speaker 2: Doting Dads Instagram page or before Matt yells at me

1424
01:00:26,920 --> 01:00:30,280
Speaker 2: again yells at me, there's one more thing.

1425
01:00:30,200 --> 01:00:30,520
Speaker 1: You can do.

1426
01:00:31,320 --> 01:00:33,880
Speaker 2: You can go onto the Facebook groups hype in two

1427
01:00:33,960 --> 01:00:36,520
Speaker 2: Doting Dads and join the chat with us.

1428
01:00:36,680 --> 01:00:38,680
Speaker 4: Shall we get out here, Let's go Buddy's Chair.

1429
01:00:43,840 --> 01:00:47,400
Speaker 1: Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country

1430
01:00:47,480 --> 01:00:51,120
Speaker 1: throughout Australia and the connections to land, see and community.

1431
01:00:51,400 --> 01:00:53,920
Speaker 2: We pay our respects to their elders past and present

1432
01:00:54,000 --> 01:00:56,840
Speaker 2: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and torrestraight on

1433
01:00:56,960 --> 01:01:00,720
Speaker 2: the People's Today. This episode was recorded on Gatego Land