WEBVTT - What Is The Gossip Hierarchy? 🗣️ 0:00:00.920 --> 0:00:04.000 The flex and Rooms Daily podcast. 0:00:04.840 --> 0:00:08.720 Okay, some of them. I was listening to the podcast 0:00:08.760 --> 0:00:11.680 the other day and I realized when I laughed about. 0:00:12.200 --> 0:00:15.440 Yeah, it's not it's an innay I told you before. 0:00:15.480 --> 0:00:21.239 It's a may what is it? It's it's not a name, 0:00:21.280 --> 0:00:24.960 but you know horses do it. It's like a yeah, I. 0:00:24.920 --> 0:00:27.320 Need to abolish it. Like sometimes I listen, I think, 0:00:27.600 --> 0:00:29.840 what would this sound like if you hated us? Like, 0:00:29.960 --> 0:00:31.600 what is it that you chick up on and think? 0:00:32.240 --> 0:00:34.320 Fuck them? I reckon it's the nay. 0:00:34.600 --> 0:00:38.519 That is a very wild exercise to be doing. Generally, 0:00:38.600 --> 0:00:40.120 it's probably not good for your mental health. 0:00:42.080 --> 0:00:43.519 No, no, no, I think I think it's part of 0:00:44.040 --> 0:00:47.120 bettering yourself. Yeah, of course. But alas today we are 0:00:47.159 --> 0:00:50.440 talking about gossiping and a special thing Flexi says is 0:00:50.520 --> 0:00:51.600 the gossip hierarchy. 0:00:51.800 --> 0:00:53.720 Well, I got it from this guy on Instagram, I 0:00:53.720 --> 0:00:55.080 mean on TikTok called brand. 0:00:54.840 --> 0:00:58.760 FLEs brand Flekes with two z's. That's all I want 0:00:58.760 --> 0:01:00.480 to do for the explanation, because I really really need 0:01:00.480 --> 0:01:03.080 to go and get up right now. Wait them more. 0:01:04.560 --> 0:01:04.960 Toilet. 0:01:05.760 --> 0:01:08.720 That's not me trying to be cute. Literally, I'm gonna 0:01:08.720 --> 0:01:12.200 fucking burst I got a girl guy right out of. 0:01:12.160 --> 0:01:14.840 Here, I got a girl fleck and frooms. 0:01:15.240 --> 0:01:18.000 See, you just only be talking about gossiping. You can 0:01:18.000 --> 0:01:20.360 listen to the full segment on our podcast Can you 0:01:20.400 --> 0:01:23.840 get your podcasts? But I don't know if you remember, 0:01:23.880 --> 0:01:26.679 but back in the day, Facebook was the ideal place 0:01:26.720 --> 0:01:30.039 to collect gossip, be it in podcast groups or other 0:01:30.080 --> 0:01:35.920 kind of niche groups. They gave you the illusion of privacy, mutuality, 0:01:35.959 --> 0:01:38.520 screenshots exist, and we were sharing outside the group. 0:01:39.480 --> 0:01:40.479 That was a big one. 0:01:40.520 --> 0:01:40.839 Though. 0:01:41.000 --> 0:01:42.360 There was a time I'm gonna say it was like 0:01:42.400 --> 0:01:45.800 twenty eighteen where you had to be part of like 0:01:46.080 --> 0:01:51.440 a local feminist Facebook group, a local girl podcaster group, 0:01:51.560 --> 0:01:54.600 and like in that group it felt sacred. But be real, 0:01:54.680 --> 0:01:57.600 there were seventy thousand people in there, your personal story. 0:01:57.680 --> 0:02:00.280 I could click on your profile, see our mutual green 0:02:00.320 --> 0:02:03.640 shot that information, take it out. It wasn't safe, but 0:02:03.680 --> 0:02:05.000 it felt like and that's what matters. 0:02:05.320 --> 0:02:08.600 I was in that phase I reckon twenty fifteen, and 0:02:08.639 --> 0:02:09.680 I was spilling a lot. 0:02:10.440 --> 0:02:13.200 You were you were, you were sharing your own business. 0:02:13.360 --> 0:02:16.320 Yes, whoa in the group? In the feminist group? You know, 0:02:16.360 --> 0:02:18.920 we're all called by vibes. And then of course it 0:02:18.960 --> 0:02:24.120 evolved into a madman a fistfight fest. But Alas, this 0:02:24.200 --> 0:02:26.600 one is I've brought a love line in so I'm 0:02:26.639 --> 0:02:29.359 going to give you like a submission that was put 0:02:29.400 --> 0:02:32.960 on a Facebook. It is part of unimil love Letters. 0:02:33.000 --> 0:02:35.960 Now this was really are you in there? I'm infiltrated, 0:02:36.080 --> 0:02:36.560 got centered? 0:02:36.639 --> 0:02:40.400 Okay, so someone's broken the rules taking a screenshot. Okay, 0:02:40.480 --> 0:02:42.440 and well mind implicated you. 0:02:42.760 --> 0:02:46.040 This is public. But the UNIMEL love Letters was a 0:02:46.080 --> 0:02:48.400 thing where people would be on UNI Melbourne campus and 0:02:48.440 --> 0:02:51.400 see someone cute, so they text in. So this woman 0:02:51.480 --> 0:02:52.919 da da da, like, can we go on a date? 0:02:53.320 --> 0:02:55.840 I'm not sure if the stories were planted or if never, 0:02:56.040 --> 0:02:59.360 what's a success rate for that? But Alas, here is 0:02:59.680 --> 0:03:02.240 a mission. It's number four, four, five six one. Oh 0:03:02.320 --> 0:03:05.600 my gosh. There's a lot of submissions. You can't catch 0:03:05.600 --> 0:03:08.880 a break with rooms and this is a love letter 0:03:09.560 --> 0:03:12.280 dear soon to be ex boyfriend. Oh I like that 0:03:12.840 --> 0:03:15.280 and as brackets soon to be We met a few 0:03:15.360 --> 0:03:18.840 years back when we were both in undergrad. I was 0:03:18.919 --> 0:03:20.840 new to the country and you were my first friend 0:03:20.840 --> 0:03:23.280 and we quickly fell in love. For years, you were 0:03:23.320 --> 0:03:27.160 all I had in Australia. You were my everything. Fast 0:03:27.200 --> 0:03:30.560 forward four years. We graduated together, moved in together, and 0:03:30.600 --> 0:03:34.079 tried to build our life together. We got jobs, very 0:03:34.080 --> 0:03:37.120 different jobs, and we met new people and made new friends. 0:03:37.360 --> 0:03:39.520 What I haven't told you, and haven't had the courage 0:03:39.520 --> 0:03:41.680 to tell you, is that I met someone at work. 0:03:42.240 --> 0:03:44.720 He treats me very well, he makes me happy, and 0:03:44.760 --> 0:03:46.200 he supports me financially. 0:03:46.680 --> 0:03:49.240 Okay, there we go here. I wasn't we there for 0:03:49.240 --> 0:03:51.960 a second, but he said the magic words. 0:03:52.280 --> 0:03:55.000 I'm on board, dear soon to be ex boyfriend. I 0:03:55.000 --> 0:03:55.760 found a rich man. 0:03:55.840 --> 0:03:58.640 Yeah that period, do us for a loop. 0:04:00.480 --> 0:04:02.640 I'm in love with him. I'm sorry that this didn't 0:04:02.680 --> 0:04:05.080 work out. For a while. You were all I knew. Now, 0:04:05.160 --> 0:04:08.640 I know there is more to find out out there, brutal. 0:04:08.840 --> 0:04:10.760 By the time this gets posted, I would have already 0:04:10.800 --> 0:04:12.520 packed up my things and moved out of your house 0:04:12.560 --> 0:04:14.760 while you're at work. I'm sorry I couldn't break up 0:04:14.760 --> 0:04:17.560 with you in person. I'm a coward. Consider this love 0:04:17.640 --> 0:04:19.880 letting me breaking up with you. I have blocked you 0:04:19.920 --> 0:04:22.520 off every social media platform and I've changed my number. 0:04:22.720 --> 0:04:25.400 Please don't try to find me. This person is sick. 0:04:25.880 --> 0:04:27.160 Your now ex girlfriend. 0:04:27.960 --> 0:04:31.640 There is no way that is just creative writing some 0:04:32.440 --> 0:04:35.000 literary major I don't know what they call them in 0:04:35.000 --> 0:04:39.360 the straightlier, but that is not that person's not well. 0:04:39.560 --> 0:04:41.640 Well, someone agreed with that's actually in the comments, the 0:04:41.680 --> 0:04:45.080 substance he supports me financially. But everyone in the comments 0:04:45.160 --> 0:04:48.360 is taking it very seriously, like it's a real thing. 0:04:48.680 --> 0:04:51.719 One person wrote how to permanently destroy someone, how to 0:04:51.720 --> 0:04:54.360 make someone have trust issues, how to make an f boy, 0:04:54.680 --> 0:04:56.640 how to ruin your own life because you realize what 0:04:56.680 --> 0:04:58.840 you did will return back to you. How to live 0:04:58.880 --> 0:05:00.280 with the fear of what if my part that does 0:05:00.320 --> 0:05:03.120 the same thing to me? Good luck original poster. Your 0:05:03.120 --> 0:05:04.960 partner deserves at least one text. 0:05:05.240 --> 0:05:08.920 By the time he figures out this is for him, 0:05:09.080 --> 0:05:11.520 like he's going to be in such a wayward state 0:05:11.600 --> 0:05:15.000 for an unnecessarily long amount of time before. 0:05:14.800 --> 0:05:16.680 He's like, wait a second, that's for me. 0:05:17.839 --> 0:05:21.640 It's brutal stuff. I totally understand. No, I don't understand, 0:05:21.680 --> 0:05:24.560 but I can empathize with someone who feels as though 0:05:24.560 --> 0:05:27.640 they've blown up their life so much that their only 0:05:27.760 --> 0:05:33.920 option is to do something so just catastrophic tru really 0:05:34.600 --> 0:05:37.039 nail it home. But I feel like there were so 0:05:37.320 --> 0:05:41.680 many easier ways to do this MESSI like this just 0:05:41.720 --> 0:05:47.760 feels number one so selfish, but number two so chaotic 0:05:48.279 --> 0:05:52.359 and thoughtless and just mean. And you know what's so 0:05:52.440 --> 0:05:57.000 wild though, it's this like really selfish behavior, master is 0:05:57.080 --> 0:05:59.640 selfless behavior, Like this is the best way I could 0:05:59.640 --> 0:06:02.719 give this this information to you because I love you 0:06:02.839 --> 0:06:05.880 so much. Just like or write him a letter. You've 0:06:05.920 --> 0:06:09.920 just publicly shamed him for for what you know where 0:06:09.920 --> 0:06:12.640 he lives. Pop a letter in and just bounce a 0:06:12.680 --> 0:06:14.080 big fan of a letter. Have you ever done a 0:06:14.120 --> 0:06:17.039 letter I've done. I've drafted a letter in the notes. 0:06:17.040 --> 0:06:19.719 We've all done a few notes letters, sent it through, 0:06:20.240 --> 0:06:21.880 but I haven't done a physical letter in my time 0:06:21.920 --> 0:06:23.880 for you. Yeah, that would be a really good pen 0:06:23.960 --> 0:06:25.000 to paper or something like it. 0:06:25.000 --> 0:06:27.520 It's brilliant. You do it in your notes and then 0:06:27.560 --> 0:06:29.320 you start. It's just a lovely exercise to like do 0:06:29.400 --> 0:06:32.640 your beautiful writing. It feels very cathartic. Pop in the mail, 0:06:33.200 --> 0:06:34.840 wait for them to send you one back soon as 0:06:34.839 --> 0:06:37.440 I'll send you a physical one. Other times they'll reply 0:06:37.760 --> 0:06:41.760 via text message. But it's cathartic. I do like that. 0:06:42.040 --> 0:06:45.720 But our producer Brook, who's just standing sitting by us, 0:06:45.760 --> 0:06:48.440 says she has sent something into one of those anonymous 0:06:48.440 --> 0:06:50.160 Facebook groups, and I was, so I need to hear 0:06:50.200 --> 0:06:52.000 this story, so I'm gonna hand over the mic please. 0:06:52.520 --> 0:06:52.760 Yeah. 0:06:52.839 --> 0:06:55.560 So I used to submit to my UNI ones. It 0:06:55.600 --> 0:06:58.520 wasn't just like love based ones. It was also just 0:06:58.560 --> 0:07:01.720 like general confessions, and they were probably the most disturbing 0:07:01.800 --> 0:07:03.000 thing I've ever come up with. 0:07:03.160 --> 0:07:05.800 Slash written and read ohs not real. 0:07:06.240 --> 0:07:07.320 Oh of course they're made up. 0:07:07.320 --> 0:07:10.400 It was just literally by creatively disgusting, is how I 0:07:10.480 --> 0:07:11.120 describe it. 0:07:12.680 --> 0:07:13.840 What did you get out of doing that? 0:07:14.520 --> 0:07:17.280 It was just so funny because people would then reply 0:07:17.440 --> 0:07:19.080 to it thinking it was real, and it's like, you've 0:07:19.080 --> 0:07:21.560 got to be joking seriously, And that was kind of 0:07:22.160 --> 0:07:23.120 my idea of fun. 0:07:23.360 --> 0:07:25.440 See, I think I'm the naive person because if I 0:07:25.520 --> 0:07:27.280 go on to like a Reddit forum, if I see 0:07:27.320 --> 0:07:29.560 a post on Facebook, I'm just assuming it's true. I'm like, 0:07:29.560 --> 0:07:31.440 why would someone lie? Who has enough time in the 0:07:31.520 --> 0:07:32.280 day to lie? 0:07:32.480 --> 0:07:34.640 Well, there were so many details with it as well 0:07:34.680 --> 0:07:36.800 that it's like, who would be bothered to make this up? 0:07:36.880 --> 0:07:40.800 So I think they thought it was real. You've lost it, babe, 0:07:41.480 --> 0:07:45.240 that's Brooky, our producer, always surprising us. 0:07:45.560 --> 0:07:48.320 Literally, Brookies lived a thousand lives. One thing about me, 0:07:48.400 --> 0:07:51.320 I'm stale in comparison. I'm just like, why would somebody lie? 0:07:51.360 --> 0:07:53.160 This is like the most earnest and honest thing, but 0:07:53.240 --> 0:07:55.160 this is like categorically insane. 0:07:55.440 --> 0:07:57.960 There you have it. I really did enjoy that. 0:07:58.160 --> 0:07:58.400 Look. 0:07:58.480 --> 0:08:00.520 I will say it's moments I this is what I 0:08:00.560 --> 0:08:03.160 wish that I was more committed to making my life 0:08:03.160 --> 0:08:06.200 feel like a movie or a sitcom or something. Because 0:08:06.240 --> 0:08:09.040 this is adding spice. This is gonna be a fantastic 0:08:09.120 --> 0:08:11.840 story to tell someone in future, like what's the worst 0:08:11.880 --> 0:08:14.440 way you've broken up with someone? There we go, there's 0:08:14.480 --> 0:08:16.880 gonna be a six part mini series on Stan. 0:08:16.760 --> 0:08:20.040 Of course, Flex and frooms. 0:08:20.200 --> 0:08:22.840 Right now for me has tuna in her hand, but 0:08:22.880 --> 0:08:23.680 it's boxed. 0:08:24.000 --> 0:08:26.160 We've got a box of tuna. I'm gonna do my best, 0:08:26.200 --> 0:08:28.280 since we are on radio, to explain what this looks like. 0:08:28.600 --> 0:08:31.160 It's a white box about the size of my palm, 0:08:31.280 --> 0:08:34.200 and it says future tuna. It's very kind of twenty 0:08:34.280 --> 0:08:35.880 twenty twenty twenty two brand. 0:08:35.960 --> 0:08:40.040 It is so cool. It's giving a five notebook helvetica. 0:08:40.200 --> 0:08:42.760 It's impact on actually, but if you're not familiar with typography, 0:08:42.800 --> 0:08:44.000 let's just say hell medica bold. 0:08:45.120 --> 0:08:48.280 It's quite beautiful and it's from a brand called Future Farm. 0:08:48.320 --> 0:08:51.200 It's a revolutionary plant based tuna for all tuna lovers, 0:08:51.480 --> 0:08:53.559 and instead of the you and tuna, it's a v 0:08:54.160 --> 0:08:54.520 very tough. 0:08:54.600 --> 0:08:56.600 Oh yeah, it's twenty twelve. 0:08:56.720 --> 0:08:59.680 So I've got Chabra packets. I'm gonna give you this. 0:09:00.520 --> 0:09:02.440 Should we just open the one packet though, because I 0:09:02.440 --> 0:09:05.160 feel like, let's not waste it. I have actually had 0:09:05.200 --> 0:09:07.440 a plant based tuna before, because I do dabble in 0:09:07.480 --> 0:09:09.040 plant based foods every now and then, because I know 0:09:09.080 --> 0:09:12.720 there's gonna be a time where I prioritize my health overconvenience, 0:09:12.760 --> 0:09:14.680 and the first way to do that is go plant based. 0:09:14.679 --> 0:09:17.200 But I don't want eat vegetables. So I remember on 0:09:17.240 --> 0:09:20.240 a shoot they had gave us plant based tuna wraps. 0:09:20.240 --> 0:09:21.640 It tasted just like tuna. 0:09:21.520 --> 0:09:24.520 Taste a good Yeah. I've done to taste this years ago, 0:09:25.040 --> 0:09:27.200 of this plant based tuna vegan tuna. It was the 0:09:27.240 --> 0:09:29.040 worst thing I've ever had in my whole life. Really, 0:09:29.080 --> 0:09:32.880 It's like wet cat food mixed with carpet. So let's 0:09:32.880 --> 0:09:33.840 see how this one goes. 0:09:34.200 --> 0:09:38.120 I guess open it up. Oh, it is in this 0:09:38.559 --> 0:09:44.199 silver foil aluminium space food vacuum sealed bag and it 0:09:44.280 --> 0:09:46.880 looks like we can't see through it. But based on 0:09:46.920 --> 0:09:48.320 the way Thrumi's playing with it. 0:09:48.160 --> 0:09:52.560 It's slop, it's squishy. Oh my god, I'm scared tune 0:09:52.600 --> 0:09:58.920 out of a bag. Well, this smells like tuna. Okay, 0:09:58.960 --> 0:10:00.000 I don't want to get this on my tracks. 0:10:00.360 --> 0:10:03.000 Before we try, we have to address the fact that 0:10:03.440 --> 0:10:07.240 if this was real tuna, we would never eat it 0:10:07.280 --> 0:10:09.320 out of a packet like this. It would never happen. 0:10:09.480 --> 0:10:12.520 Why are we making accommodations for fake tuna? I can 0:10:12.559 --> 0:10:14.080 smell that from here. It's wafting. 0:10:14.360 --> 0:10:16.280 Okay, Well it's not real fish, so we can chill 0:10:16.280 --> 0:10:19.120 out the ingredients of water plant based protein which is 0:10:19.160 --> 0:10:24.040 soy pea, chick pea, olive oil, natural flowering, and to 0:10:24.240 --> 0:10:28.600 micro algae that is strong. Okay. So I'm actually not 0:10:28.679 --> 0:10:30.280 mad about it. I think if you put it into 0:10:30.520 --> 0:10:33.320 a pastuck, it tastes really good. It's just the packet 0:10:33.360 --> 0:10:34.080 is putting me off. 0:10:34.440 --> 0:10:37.640 What I will say is that there's like this film 0:10:37.880 --> 0:10:41.559 around it, like this thick film that is so miscellaneous. 0:10:41.720 --> 0:10:43.800 If you don't look at it, it tastes a lot 0:10:43.840 --> 0:10:45.800 like tuna. You know, I picky eat it right. So 0:10:46.040 --> 0:10:47.440 a lot of what puts me off about food is 0:10:47.440 --> 0:10:49.040 the way it looks. So sometimes I eat my food 0:10:49.080 --> 0:10:50.679 in low lighting so I don't have to look at it, 0:10:50.720 --> 0:10:52.560 and I just like gobble it down. This is one 0:10:52.559 --> 0:10:55.360 of those situations. It does taste like tuna, but at 0:10:55.360 --> 0:10:55.800 what cost? 0:10:57.160 --> 0:10:58.920 You know what. The more I think about it, I'm 0:10:58.920 --> 0:11:00.720 out of my tuna era. I used to eat tuna 0:11:00.760 --> 0:11:02.160 every day for lunch for two. 0:11:02.200 --> 0:11:04.200 You're the reason why I started eating tuna. 0:11:04.400 --> 0:11:05.160 Do you like it too? 0:11:05.240 --> 0:11:07.560 It's a two parter for me. Would not stop posting 0:11:07.600 --> 0:11:11.280 about tuna, sirena' is that how you pronounce it? Serena? 0:11:11.520 --> 0:11:13.960 Not sure, but she wouldn't stop posting about it. And 0:11:14.040 --> 0:11:16.720 then my best friend at the time would make this 0:11:16.800 --> 0:11:21.000 snack dish roast pumpkin and tuna, And so I wouldn't 0:11:21.040 --> 0:11:24.160 have tried tuna generally if I hadn't seen you obsessed 0:11:24.160 --> 0:11:26.760 with it. Tried it. It was amazing, But then I 0:11:26.760 --> 0:11:28.360 figured I'm actually a John West girl. 0:11:28.679 --> 0:11:30.800 Nah. That's where I got it. In the segment, and 0:11:30.840 --> 0:11:34.240 we're done. Thank you so much. Shout out to Future Future, 0:11:34.440 --> 0:11:38.800 Future Future FUM. The fact that it's vegan, it's pretty crazy. 0:11:38.840 --> 0:11:40.199 If we put this into a rap, I think it 0:11:40.200 --> 0:11:42.080 would be delicious. Oh it taste It's just like tuna. 0:11:42.200 --> 0:11:44.320 So if you're a vegan, you want tuna, I recommend 0:11:44.320 --> 0:11:45.240 I would say yes. 0:11:46.080 --> 0:11:48.800 I would say it's maybe more flavorful than tuna, because 0:11:48.840 --> 0:11:51.600 why was that micro piece still lingering in my mouth 0:11:51.720 --> 0:11:55.600 like it's catching meat exactly? 0:11:55.800 --> 0:11:57.720 This is flex and frooms. 0:11:58.800 --> 0:12:02.280 It is not often I see something on the Internet 0:12:02.400 --> 0:12:05.240 that makes me question how I see the world. I 0:12:05.280 --> 0:12:08.200 think it makes me think briefly, and then I scroll 0:12:08.280 --> 0:12:10.400 past and I'm back to my own biases about the 0:12:10.400 --> 0:12:14.000 way things should be. But this person made a video 0:12:14.160 --> 0:12:16.839 about gossiping, not that we should or shouldn't do it, 0:12:17.120 --> 0:12:21.000 but in particular if we're going to the rules and 0:12:21.040 --> 0:12:22.280 guidelines for how. 0:12:22.120 --> 0:12:23.000 We should approach it. 0:12:23.320 --> 0:12:28.720 This TikToker brand Underscore Flakes with two z's describes the 0:12:28.760 --> 0:12:30.319 gossiping hierarchy. 0:12:29.920 --> 0:12:32.560 Like this, I love to gossip, but in order to 0:12:32.720 --> 0:12:35.360 really enjoy gossiping, you need to trust the people that 0:12:35.400 --> 0:12:37.440 you are gossiping with. Don't that any present you the 0:12:37.480 --> 0:12:40.240 gossip hierarchy of trust that I've created. On the bottom 0:12:40.240 --> 0:12:42.640 of our hierarchy of trust, it's anyone in the world 0:12:42.679 --> 0:12:46.040 that you may now, Celebrities, people you follow, people on 0:12:46.120 --> 0:12:49.360 the street, just anyone that you see that exists in 0:12:49.360 --> 0:12:51.839 your mind that you could potentially gossip about or gossip to. 0:12:52.080 --> 0:12:54.320 They're on the bottom of the totem pole. We trust them. 0:12:54.360 --> 0:12:57.280 The least above them is acquaintances. People that you're friendly with, 0:12:57.320 --> 0:12:59.400 you may not necessarily love, or you might not be 0:12:59.440 --> 0:13:02.080 their best friend, and you might feel comfortable gossiping to 0:13:02.120 --> 0:13:04.079 them about a few things. But if I were you, 0:13:04.240 --> 0:13:06.240 I wouldn't gossip with them about much because you don't 0:13:06.240 --> 0:13:08.000 know how much you can trust those people. I love 0:13:08.040 --> 0:13:10.520 them is obviously your best friends. These are some of 0:13:10.520 --> 0:13:12.280 the best people to goasip with because not only do 0:13:12.320 --> 0:13:14.120 you likely trust them and they likely trust you, you 0:13:14.200 --> 0:13:16.280 probably also have a ton of mutual people that you 0:13:16.280 --> 0:13:19.600 can gasp about. Top of the hierarchy. You know, we've 0:13:19.600 --> 0:13:22.640 got our moms and our significant others. There is nothing 0:13:22.880 --> 0:13:26.480 like gossiping on the phone to your mom about everybody. 0:13:26.640 --> 0:13:28.480 And that is why this hierarchy is set up like this, 0:13:28.520 --> 0:13:31.679 because while there are some exceptions. The one basic rule 0:13:31.840 --> 0:13:35.440 is you should never gossip about someone higher up in 0:13:35.480 --> 0:13:37.880 the hierarchy to someone lower up in the hierarchy. 0:13:38.040 --> 0:13:40.480 The thoughts are in my head and they're running around. 0:13:40.520 --> 0:13:44.280 They've got little legs, no arms, one head each, and 0:13:44.320 --> 0:13:47.640 I cannot control them. I think gossiping is very important 0:13:48.000 --> 0:13:50.600 because I think that it encourages people to be better communicators. 0:13:50.600 --> 0:13:52.520 Because the one thing about gossip, in order for it 0:13:52.559 --> 0:13:56.040 to be effective, it has to be understood as intended. 0:13:56.280 --> 0:13:57.840 If I'm coming to you to gossip and you're not 0:13:58.040 --> 0:14:00.600 hearing me as I intend, then it's pointless for me. 0:14:00.720 --> 0:14:03.320 It's not fun for you. So I think that, like 0:14:03.440 --> 0:14:05.800 there's two types of gossip in particular, maybe even more. 0:14:06.320 --> 0:14:11.640 There's sacred gossip, such as such as you know your 0:14:11.840 --> 0:14:14.719 best friend has cheated on their partner, but you don't 0:14:14.720 --> 0:14:16.720 even think it's a bad idea, But like you're best 0:14:16.720 --> 0:14:19.120 friends with a partner as well, Like that's sacred stuff 0:14:19.480 --> 0:14:24.000 that's not everyday chat conversation at the coffee shop that requires, 0:14:24.440 --> 0:14:28.200 you know, an air of caution. But then there's community gossip. 0:14:28.760 --> 0:14:32.800 It's for everyone. It's enjoyment for the community. It's like 0:14:32.960 --> 0:14:35.800 for me to enjoy, for you to enjoy. It's small talk, 0:14:35.920 --> 0:14:39.960 it's water cooler chat, it's contextual. And sometimes every now 0:14:40.000 --> 0:14:44.360 and then sacred gossip gets into community gossip. But then 0:14:44.400 --> 0:14:46.600 you just take out a few key names and details 0:14:46.600 --> 0:14:47.920 and then it's a free for all. 0:14:47.800 --> 0:14:53.600 Right, like domokes oh dumin, dumoi dumi. They're like kind 0:14:53.600 --> 0:14:55.120 of like blind items. 0:14:55.240 --> 0:14:58.080 Yes, it's like blind items where it's like people need 0:14:58.080 --> 0:15:00.720 to see this information and you've done your due diligence 0:15:00.760 --> 0:15:04.280 by taking out anything so incriminating that it's clear who 0:15:04.360 --> 0:15:07.680 it's about. In this instance, though, I like the hierarchy, 0:15:08.440 --> 0:15:09.480 I just don't know if I use it. 0:15:10.200 --> 0:15:14.880 I have dabbled in using the hierarchy and otherwise using it. Yeah, 0:15:15.280 --> 0:15:16.960 I gotta shut my mouth sometimes. 0:15:18.040 --> 0:15:19.240 Now it's not the time. 0:15:19.720 --> 0:15:22.960 Now it's not the time. No, I would say, would 0:15:22.960 --> 0:15:24.520 you say you and I gossip? Yeah? 0:15:24.560 --> 0:15:26.920 Constantly. I feel like I know you had one conversation 0:15:26.960 --> 0:15:27.560 that isn't gossip. 0:15:29.440 --> 0:15:33.720 We actually haven't. And because it's nice, because we're in 0:15:33.720 --> 0:15:36.920 the same industry, I think we come to the table 0:15:36.960 --> 0:15:40.440 with different types of gossip from different people. But I'd 0:15:40.480 --> 0:15:42.800 say I share pretty much everything with you that's your 0:15:42.840 --> 0:15:43.640 industry gossip. 0:15:44.320 --> 0:15:47.320 The thing about the gossiping that I do with you, 0:15:47.360 --> 0:15:51.440 in particular is it's multi prompt. One thing that I 0:15:51.560 --> 0:15:53.440 need from people that I spend a lot of time 0:15:53.480 --> 0:15:55.920 with is trust, And I think the way that you 0:15:56.000 --> 0:15:59.240 build trust is you create situations where the stakes are 0:15:59.240 --> 0:16:02.280 a little bit higher than usual because you're bearing something, 0:16:02.520 --> 0:16:06.720 your own vulnerabilities, your own secrets, your own context, or 0:16:07.000 --> 0:16:08.920 just letting someone have a pick behind the curtains, like 0:16:08.960 --> 0:16:12.560 this is what happens behind the facade or behind the performance. 0:16:12.600 --> 0:16:15.320 You get to see what's happening behind there for context, 0:16:15.840 --> 0:16:18.520 not because it's the new norm, not because everyone gets 0:16:18.520 --> 0:16:21.480 to see so you see the full picture. I think 0:16:21.480 --> 0:16:24.640 it's amazing. I will say, though I used to feel 0:16:24.640 --> 0:16:27.320 like gossiping was fun with everyone, You just can't gossip 0:16:27.320 --> 0:16:29.960 with everyone because some people want to bring in morality 0:16:29.960 --> 0:16:32.520 into it. Oh but there are a nice person, maybe 0:16:32.560 --> 0:16:33.560 the situation shut it. 0:16:34.840 --> 0:16:37.840 Not interested you have to be down to clown. Yeah, 0:16:37.880 --> 0:16:39.840 some people aren't. Though it would be a mix of 0:16:39.880 --> 0:16:42.400 feeling like a bad person but also feeling that the 0:16:42.400 --> 0:16:44.600 person is a bit of a loser when they don't 0:16:44.640 --> 0:16:49.120 want to gossip. Literally, like if you're four it's like 0:16:49.120 --> 0:16:50.360 people that don't eat McDonald's. 0:16:50.640 --> 0:16:54.280 Okay, people who don't drink soft drink. Oh, shut get off, 0:16:54.320 --> 0:16:57.280 there go Wait idiot, the world is a scary enough 0:16:57.280 --> 0:16:59.480 place you don't want to enjoy. You don't want to 0:16:59.600 --> 0:17:02.520 come down to our level. We subterranean. It's us and 0:17:02.600 --> 0:17:03.400 Satan's people. 0:17:04.560 --> 0:17:07.720 Sometimes, like I'll gossip with someone about someone else and 0:17:07.760 --> 0:17:10.119 then they know more gossip than me. But I've acted 0:17:10.119 --> 0:17:12.480 like I got the inside scoop. Ooh, that's always a 0:17:12.480 --> 0:17:15.280 bit embarrassing. Yeah, that's like meta, I'm so sorry that 0:17:15.320 --> 0:17:17.639 happened to you. But yeah, I gossip about everyone. I 0:17:17.680 --> 0:17:19.199 gossip about you. You have to. 0:17:19.520 --> 0:17:22.760 Yeah, it's necessary. But I will say, like I said before, 0:17:23.000 --> 0:17:25.080 I think that gossiping we should do more of it 0:17:25.119 --> 0:17:25.800 with less people. 0:17:26.560 --> 0:17:30.280 Mm hmmmm. So yeah, it's information sharing, yes, but it's. 0:17:30.119 --> 0:17:35.880 About figuring out, like what are your own personal milestones 0:17:36.000 --> 0:17:38.720 or metrics or segments for how much gossip you're willing 0:17:38.720 --> 0:17:40.880 to share, because I think everyone deserves to feel as 0:17:40.880 --> 0:17:44.359 though there's someone worthy of gossiping too. But you have 0:17:44.440 --> 0:17:46.240 to know how far are you willing to go with 0:17:46.359 --> 0:17:48.760 this person? You're gonna be in the trenches with them. 0:17:48.800 --> 0:17:51.000 When this comes out, you know, is that you're right 0:17:51.119 --> 0:17:54.159 or die? I don't think so keep it light. We 0:17:54.240 --> 0:17:57.040 need the small talk version of gossip and the deep 0:17:57.400 --> 0:17:59.440 conversation version of gossip, because. 0:17:59.240 --> 0:18:01.720 It'd be very attempting to just spill your guts when 0:18:01.720 --> 0:18:05.360 you're in a particular mood. I'm running around Catera saying, Oh, 0:18:05.640 --> 0:18:08.400 this happened, that happened. Did you hear about this person's paycheck? 0:18:08.880 --> 0:18:10.959 Do you hear this person hates this person? 0:18:12.200 --> 0:18:14.000 It's coming out of my ears. Really, you just got 0:18:14.000 --> 0:18:18.560 to work on your media training carrying styles at venice this. 0:18:18.760 --> 0:18:20.480 I love. What do you love about the movie? 0:18:20.520 --> 0:18:20.879 Harry? 0:18:21.040 --> 0:18:25.680 I love that this movie feels like a movie king 0:18:25.800 --> 0:18:27.440 behavior because that's what I need to start doing. 0:18:27.560 --> 0:18:29.160 He's like the Marilyn Monroe of. 0:18:30.800 --> 0:18:33.399 Literally, what did you think about the event? 0:18:33.440 --> 0:18:34.120 It was interesting? 0:18:35.840 --> 0:18:37.800 What were you expecting from this event for it to 0:18:37.840 --> 0:18:39.080