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Speaker 1: Get a I'm Laala Berry, nutritionist, author, actor, TV presenter,

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Speaker 1: and professional oversharer. This podcast is all about celebrating failure

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Speaker 1: because I believe it's a chance for us to learn,

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Speaker 1: grow and face our blind spots. Each week, I'll interview

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Speaker 1: a different guest about their highs as well as their lows,

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Speaker 1: all in a bid to inspire us to fearlessly fail. Yiloha,

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Speaker 1: Welcome back to the POTTEROONI. Dear sir, this is a

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Speaker 1: welcome back to Matt. How many times have you been

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Speaker 1: on the pod now?

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Speaker 2: I'm not sure, probably ten to fifteen times.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, well, we're doing a life check in felously Failing episode.

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Speaker 1: You've also got your own pod out right now, and

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Speaker 1: I've been soaking it up up.

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Speaker 2: I feel like I've been getting a little bit of

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Speaker 2: critique from you though every week.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yes. Sometimes it's friendly, though, do you

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Speaker 1: think it's not critique? Like you're doing a bad I

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Speaker 1: love the pod. Sometimes I'll be like, oh, I helped

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Speaker 1: you do that. You didn't mention me that stuff. He

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Speaker 1: just takes something that him and I have done together and.

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Speaker 2: I talk about you in reference you.

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Speaker 1: No, you don't BLUs does Whilius will reference me more

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Speaker 1: than you reference for sure.

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Speaker 2: Definitely not true.

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Speaker 1: No, No, you're more like bus one. That's like, I'm

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Speaker 1: not going to talk about my girlfriend on this point.

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Speaker 2: No, I talk about you all the time. I'm like

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Speaker 2: constantly talking about you in real life on the podcast

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Speaker 2: and everything. Also, some like we did like an ex

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Speaker 2: dating episode like I always I say that like you're

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Speaker 2: the best girlfriend ever. Oh no, that was my favorite

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Speaker 2: app Yeah, so it's like I'm very clearly be like,

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Speaker 2: you know, no one compares to you. So that's like

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Speaker 2: a nice light wrap up of everything. That's going to

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Speaker 2: give me some brownie points for sure.

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Speaker 1: Maybe.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Anyway, that's enough about the pod. How are you?

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Speaker 2: What have you been up to today?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, let's have a little life check in with each other.

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Speaker 1: So it's obviously it's just gone six pm here in

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Speaker 1: La and you're in beautiful Byron Bay. What time has

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Speaker 1: it just gone for you?

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Speaker 2: Eleven o seven in the eighth?

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Speaker 1: Are we going to be honest with the listeners?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: What time? Were? We meant to record this podcast.

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Speaker 2: An hour ago?

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Speaker 1: But what happened? I slept in So this is the

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Speaker 1: funniest thing, and this is what I wanted to bring

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Speaker 1: up about your podcast. So for people at home listening,

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Speaker 1: it's called Paradise Problems. It's you and your lovely friend

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Speaker 1: Elias Black, and you both just talk about real shit,

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Speaker 1: but you live in paradise essentially, all right. So in

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Speaker 1: the episode This Morning that I listened to today, it's the

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Speaker 1: most recent episode, and you're both talking about your morning routines,

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Speaker 1: and it was really sweet because you're like, I love it.

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Speaker 1: Lala gets up, goes to pilates and then when she

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Speaker 1: comes back, you know, like coffee. I yell out, La

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Speaker 1: La boss, and she makes me a coffee, and I

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Speaker 1: was like, yeah, that's something I love, Like I miss that.

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Speaker 1: That's something I really miss about not being physically with

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Speaker 1: you right now. But the bit that got me was this.

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Speaker 1: Matt goes, oh, you know, I naturally wake up seven

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Speaker 1: thirty eight every morning.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, no, no, no, on when you're here, I wake

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Speaker 2: up earlier. Oh boss, no, no, no, I'd never woken up.

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Speaker 1: At seven thirty other than the day we did the

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Speaker 1: IVF egg collection. You woke up at six. True, you

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Speaker 1: don't wake up at symathy, I'm telling you. I go

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Speaker 1: to six thirty am. Pilates. I'm back at quarter to eight.

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Speaker 2: I got to get up at six tomorrow morning, and

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Speaker 2: I'm not happy about that. Why do you all you

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Speaker 2: do by seven? We're going to be in Brisbane by nine.

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Speaker 1: But that's influencer life for you. You're doing a collab.

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Speaker 2: I'm like the not the influencer. I'm like the influencer buddy,

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Speaker 2: and three.

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Speaker 1: Excuse me who organized and facilitated?

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Speaker 2: Just to say that, I was like, it is through

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Speaker 2: your work contact, this is through your work collab that

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Speaker 2: you organize this. Thank you.

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Speaker 1: Oh thanks. I was wondering. I was like, I wonder

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Speaker 1: how this is going to go down tomorrow. Are they

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Speaker 1: going to be like, oh thanks Loa.

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Speaker 2: Yes, It'll be always thank you, Lola. No. So, just

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Speaker 2: to clarify with everybody, right when you are here, I

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Speaker 2: do wake up earlier, so you're back earlier.

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Speaker 1: Is not seven thirty, though there is no way you

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Speaker 1: wake up.

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Speaker 2: So many times I wake up at seven thirty and

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Speaker 2: then I'm like, you know, okay, but.

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Speaker 1: The listener cannot hear this, but I'll see this. But

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Speaker 1: Matt's eyes averted at the moment he said, so many

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Speaker 1: times I wake up at seventh He looked to the

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Speaker 1: side of the room like he's telling it a porky pie,

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Speaker 1: because you are.

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Speaker 2: I'm not tying to porky pie. But yes, when you're here,

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Speaker 2: I wake up earlier. When you're not here, I just

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Speaker 2: let my body naturally wake up. And sometimes that's nine

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Speaker 2: o'clock and sometimes that's nine point thirty, and today it

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Speaker 2: was nine forty five.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, which I was like texting him and I'm like, boss,

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Speaker 1: because you know, I also have a roomy and I

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Speaker 1: don't want to be recording when she gets home from

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Speaker 1: work and feel bad, like because I'm in the main

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Speaker 1: space and I'm like, is he forgotten or is he

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Speaker 1: just snoozing? No, she's just snoozing.

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Speaker 2: Also, I've been taking that CBD, the sleep CBD.

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Speaker 1: We allowed to say that. I know it's legal here,

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Speaker 1: but in Australia.

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Speaker 2: Yeah it's fine. Yeah, it's so fine, okay. And I've

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Speaker 2: been having the deepest sleeps, just like crazy epic deep sleep,

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Speaker 2: like almost two much.

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Speaker 1: I feel You've got to send send a photo of

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Speaker 1: that product to our friend Rach because she would love

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Speaker 1: to know about that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. No, no, we talk about CBD all the time.

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Speaker 1: Oh cool.

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Speaker 2: She loves Anyway, what have you been up to today?

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Speaker 2: Because you today? Oh because what, Well, you just made

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Speaker 2: it all about me for the last five minutes.

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Speaker 1: That's okay. Today, I've done jogues. I've done two self

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Speaker 1: tapes for an audition for a commercial for an active

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Speaker 1: wear brand, so I went for both both, like the

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Speaker 1: lead character and the supporting and I've cleaned the HAYOUSEO.

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Speaker 1: I'm learning a script at the moment, and I've just

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Speaker 1: made sure I'm try'm trying to get off book by

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Speaker 1: the time i'm in. I've got to do an audition

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Speaker 1: for this acting class next week. And so they said

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Speaker 1: to treat it like you were going for a casting,

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Speaker 1: which means like, no, the script really well essentially, and

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Speaker 1: I'm doing it in an American accent.

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Speaker 2: Oh cool, very cool.

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Speaker 1: That's what I've been doing today.

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Speaker 2: How's the weather was still a bit cold? I'm topless

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Speaker 2: and you were in a jumper?

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Speaker 1: Well, yes, So I'm living closer to the ocean, which

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Speaker 1: naturally means like five to ten degrees colder than Lost

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Speaker 1: Feelers where I used to live. And we're instill in

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Speaker 1: may he here, so they call it gray May and

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Speaker 1: June gloom. So it doesn't get really sunny until July.

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Speaker 2: Gotcha. Hey, can we talk about the treats that you

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Speaker 2: sent me? Yes? Yeah, because I've already smashed half of

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Speaker 2: this Trader Joe's Hall and everyone loves it when you

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Speaker 2: do a Trader Joe's Hall, So you can see I've

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Speaker 2: I was smashing these last night. These are the these

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Speaker 2: are finished.

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Speaker 1: They feel like they were your least favorite.

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Speaker 2: They were, but they were just so easy to eat.

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Speaker 2: Trader Joe's dark chocolate covered powerberries real fruit juice pieces

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Speaker 2: made with assay pomegranate cranberry were reduces dipped in smooth,

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Speaker 2: dark chocolate. So imagine like a fruit juice kind of

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Speaker 2: jelly ish center, but not super jelly center, but a

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Speaker 2: little bit.

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Speaker 1: Can I ask a question? What's the sugar content?

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Speaker 2: Oh? I don't think you want to know that?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Do it stops me buying them? Saying amount per serving?

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Speaker 2: So serving size is eight pieces, thirty gram so eight

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Speaker 2: little balls. Yeah, one hundred and thirty calories.

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Speaker 1: So it like twenty one grams or something of sugar.

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Speaker 2: Says total carb hydrate twenty grams. Total sugars eighteen grams,

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Speaker 2: includes seventeen grams added sugar thirty four percent.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's so thirty four percent mean thirty four percent

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Speaker 1: of the entire ball is sugar.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, so in.

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Speaker 1: I always thought that that would mean thirty four percent

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Speaker 1: of RDI, but no, it means, yeah, each ball is

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Speaker 1: thirty four percent sugar.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. And so in eight in eight pieces, having thirty

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Speaker 2: grams of this, you have eighteen grams.

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Speaker 1: Sure, so one teaspoon is four yeah, yeah, it's a

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Speaker 1: fair bit. How many teaspoons of sugar is that?

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Speaker 2: That's a lot?

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Speaker 1: How many times is four going to eighteen? Four and

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Speaker 1: a half times.

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Speaker 2: Something like that?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a four and a half four and a

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Speaker 1: half teaspoons of sugars. Yeah, yeah, I know. That's the

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Speaker 1: thing about America. I've got to watch out for the

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Speaker 1: veggie oils, like the polyunsat traded vegetable oils, the seed

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Speaker 1: oils essentially, and I've got to watch out for the sugars.

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Speaker 1: Trader Joe's makes the best snacks, but they really do

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Speaker 1: add sugar and boils, which we don't want.

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Speaker 2: So my favorite has been the chocolate covered.

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Speaker 1: Pretzels with the peanut butter inside.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, they are insane, like actually insane. They

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Speaker 2: are my I'm literally I've smashed like ninety percent of

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Speaker 2: the packet and I've been allowing myself one a day,

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Speaker 2: so it lasts like forever.

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Speaker 1: That's so funny. I'll bring you more back.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I probably need another. I need another bag.

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Speaker 1: That's so funny that.

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Speaker 2: They are insane, boss like their best things I've ever

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Speaker 2: had in my entire life.

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Speaker 1: That's that good.

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Speaker 2: They're so so good. They're so good. I can't stop

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Speaker 2: eating them.

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Speaker 1: I haven't tried them. I had them last year and

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Speaker 1: I remembered liking them but not loving them. No, I

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Speaker 1: love them, but I'm not a peanut butter person.

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Speaker 2: That's not true.

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Speaker 1: Yes, you are you No, I'm a Reeses you love.

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Speaker 2: I was going to say that you like Reese's peanut butter.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and I love the white chocolate thin peanut butter cups.

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Speaker 2: I've got them. I think I'm going to do I

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Speaker 2: think I'm going to have them today. I'll do a

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Speaker 2: review today for you.

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Speaker 1: Oh, thank you, dear. So have you seen I think

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Speaker 1: I was telling you about the SmartLess podcast, which you

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Speaker 1: know I love. They've got an on tour TV show

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Speaker 1: and will Nett really wants to get a deal as

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Speaker 1: the voice of Reese. Some Americans call it Reese's. I

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Speaker 1: don't know if you know that. But and he's he's

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Speaker 1: eating Reese's you know, yeah, peanut butter cup and he's like,

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Speaker 1: has anyone told you about this story about a guy

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Speaker 1: and he's having a peanut butter and he drops it

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Speaker 1: in chocolate and he's trying to like ad for Reese. Yeah, funny, Rachel,

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Speaker 1: I would highly recommend watching The Smartleest Show if anyone

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Speaker 1: can get a hand. I don't know how do you

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Speaker 1: watch in Australia. Here, it's on HBO Max.

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Speaker 2: What's HBO in Australia? Binge?

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Speaker 1: Maybe yoube on Binge? Yeah, Binge? Or Stan? You get

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Speaker 1: random shows on stand ye?

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Speaker 2: Stan. You keep sending me clips about with Jason Bateman

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Speaker 2: talking about how many times his showers in a day

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Speaker 2: after he poohs every.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I think he's got like a beautiful amount of

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Speaker 1: o CD. Yeah yeah, I think so.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I mean, and and like it's quite a controlled so

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Speaker 1: whereas the other guys are just like smoke and eating

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Speaker 1: burgers in every second. Well, sorry, Will is smoking. Sean

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Speaker 1: is not a smoker, I don't think. But that's so good.

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Speaker 2: I mean, three showers a day is probably a bit excessive.

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Speaker 1: No, No, so he only poohs once a day. So

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Speaker 1: he gets up in the morning, has.

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Speaker 2: A coffee, he has to have a shower straight after.

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Speaker 1: Correct, that's part of his regime. But like he's he's

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Speaker 1: openly an ex drug addict and alcoholic.

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Speaker 2: There's nothing wrong with that. Go about your day with

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Speaker 2: lice and clean, correct.

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Speaker 1: But I like to go to bed really clean. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I'm more of a nighttime shower, no matter. And the

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Speaker 1: poo just doesn't affect that. Yeah, do you know what

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Speaker 1: I mean, It doesn't affect my my shower.

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Speaker 2: Time totally totally.

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Speaker 1: But you know, you want to know you you're a

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Speaker 1: nighttime shower.

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Speaker 2: For sure, But but you pop all throughout the day.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: But I'm a very clean person in general.

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Speaker 1: You are very all thees he does so many wos.

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Speaker 2: There's there's an amount you need to do to make

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Speaker 2: sure that it's clean.

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Speaker 1: That's you do extra. You do like five extra on

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Speaker 1: top of that.

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Speaker 2: Yes, you do. There's like you can't just do like

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Speaker 2: two or three and then just like hope for the best.

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Speaker 1: Yeah you can. No, We've had long debates about this.

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Speaker 1: In case anyone listening.

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Speaker 2: No, it's you just do it till it's done, Like

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Speaker 2: there's not just like you don't just like allocate like

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Speaker 2: four and then just hope for the best. Like you

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Speaker 2: just you continue until it's fit, like, until the job's done.

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Speaker 2: You don't heart like half as.

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Speaker 1: Did you ever watch The Parks and Wreck?

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Speaker 2: No? I never got into it.

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Speaker 1: There's a scene where Chris Pratt's characters at the doctor's

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Speaker 1: surgery and I've seen this. Yeah yeah, it's like I

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Speaker 1: wipe and I wipe this like a marker. It's just

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Speaker 1: like always there more poop, wipe, more poop. So funny,

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Speaker 1: so funny. Where they come up with these bits is

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Speaker 1: just insane.

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Speaker 2: In the car with a friend who used to work

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Speaker 2: in emergency and she was saying that ninety percent of

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Speaker 2: people that come in in emergency have dirty buttholes.

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Speaker 1: Oh of course I believe that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. So the point is is that you've got to

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Speaker 2: clean it until it's done.

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Speaker 1: Not this like in America people buy wet ones for

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Speaker 1: their assholes.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, well perfect, they're onto it. In Australia, probably people

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Speaker 2: need to have more work you know.

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Speaker 1: How I know because it says flushable every time I

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Speaker 1: look in that section. I'm like, that's for bum hooles

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Speaker 1: for sure.

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Speaker 2: Oh my lord. Anyway, what else is gone on? What

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Speaker 2: else be meant to be talking about besides wiping butts?

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Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, boss. Okay, so I actually have do

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Speaker 1: believe it or not, I do have notes here for you.

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Speaker 1: I wanted to talk about. First of all, I wanted

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Speaker 1: to share something that I really miss about you. Okay,

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Speaker 1: although you are annoying me pin today, so I don't

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Speaker 1: know how that's going to go. But I thought maybe

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Speaker 1: if you I felt like you could share something that

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Speaker 1: you're missing about me. Would you like to kick it

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Speaker 1: off or would you like me to kick it off?

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Speaker 2: Okay, well, I definitely do. My number one thing that

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Speaker 2: I do miss is you in the morning. So when

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Speaker 2: you come in and we did talk about just before

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Speaker 2: and have a little morning coffee and we have a

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Speaker 2: little chin wag and then we you know, just like

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Speaker 2: connect and decompress first thing in the morning. I like that.

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Speaker 2: That's very nice. I do I do miss that. I do.

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Speaker 1: Can I get in a nook or rally, Yeah, you.

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Speaker 2: Do, I do miss. And then and then the other

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Speaker 2: end of the day where I miss, like our our

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Speaker 2: nighttime walks, you know, our little beach sunset dates. Because

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Speaker 2: when you're not.

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Speaker 1: Even after that boot, I moisturize your feet, your paddles.

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Speaker 1: Yeah you do. I'm actually quite a good girlfriend, now

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Speaker 1: that I think about it.

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Speaker 2: Back, I haven't been moisturized for oh geez, three months.

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Speaker 1: They dry as a chip.

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Speaker 2: I was actually just looking at them and I'm like,

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Speaker 2: they're actually pretty good. I've been most actually pretty no,

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Speaker 2: min not, actually they've gotten pretty good. But it is

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Speaker 2: a very barefoot place environment. Yes, environment, it's going to

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Speaker 2: say society. So yeah, I missed the morning and I

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Speaker 2: miss the sunset walks with you. Yeah, because either I

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Speaker 2: now I do the sunset walk on my own, or

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Speaker 2: I got to find a random friend to take with me.

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Speaker 2: And I mean that's nice too, but I prefer you,

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Speaker 2: you know. Yeah, yeah, pretty good because you're my bud.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, okay, what do you miss about me?

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Speaker 1: Go? Oh? So the same the morning was? I think,

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Speaker 1: like when I get up in the morns, I go

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Speaker 1: to palats, I come back, I pop your Cafe ti

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Speaker 1: Era on the stove. Well, I have my coffee, I

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Speaker 1: do all my work emails or boss is still asleep,

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Speaker 1: and then I hear this boss.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes it takes a few guys for you to hear.

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Speaker 1: Well. Sometimes I'm in the middle or something. Yes, sometimes

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00:17:16,240 --> 00:17:18,280
Speaker 1: I'll hear him say boss, and then I'll run to

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Speaker 1: the oven like the stove and get it already and

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Speaker 1: put it all on, grind the coffee beans. And you

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00:17:23,720 --> 00:17:26,360
Speaker 1: haven't heard that I've done that, And you're like boss,

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Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh, hang, hang ten, I'm doing it.

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Speaker 1: I'm doing it because I like to come into the

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Speaker 1: room after I've got the coffee on, or I like

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Speaker 1: to bring the coffee into the room with me for you,

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Speaker 1: don't I do.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, very nice, very nice.

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Speaker 1: And just to clarify, when I say I like to

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Speaker 1: get into his nook a rally, it's not like an

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Speaker 1: orifice or anything. It's your nook.

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Speaker 2: No, everyone understands what the nook is, boss.

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Speaker 1: But I said nook a rally. Okay, so maybe that

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00:17:53,320 --> 00:17:55,280
Speaker 1: could sound like something sexual. I don't know.

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Speaker 2: Everyone everyone understands the nook. I think everyone, got cha. Everyone.

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00:18:00,600 --> 00:18:05,680
Speaker 2: Everyone loves their boyfriend's nook or partner's nook. Yeah, you know,

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Speaker 2: even I like the knook. Sometimes if I feel a

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Speaker 2: bit sensitive, I'm like, I think I want to be

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Speaker 2: in I want.

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Speaker 1: To get so snugly.

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00:18:16,040 --> 00:18:20,600
Speaker 2: Yeah I haven't. I do. I think I do miss

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Speaker 2: just the actual physical proximity.

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Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, that's a that's a hard one. This year

359
00:18:29,720 --> 00:18:31,720
Speaker 1: we will have been together for five years.

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00:18:32,040 --> 00:18:34,359
Speaker 2: Wow, when's anniversary again?

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00:18:35,720 --> 00:18:39,560
Speaker 1: Oh my god, something you're doing this to me? Do

362
00:18:39,600 --> 00:18:41,080
Speaker 1: you really want to do you really want to go

363
00:18:41,119 --> 00:18:43,080
Speaker 1: down this part? Do you really want to dance his stance?

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00:18:44,359 --> 00:18:45,320
Speaker 2: I've got it written down.

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00:18:45,359 --> 00:18:49,320
Speaker 1: It's all right, eleventh of October. Doesn't like it being

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Speaker 1: that day because beginning.

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Speaker 2: Stop it, stop it.

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00:18:53,640 --> 00:18:57,359
Speaker 1: I share I was one of four fucking girls that

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00:18:57,359 --> 00:18:59,000
Speaker 1: you're walking up with, correct, like.

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Speaker 2: One of yeah? Okay, yeah that's true.

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00:19:02,200 --> 00:19:04,000
Speaker 1: How many was I want to be real.

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00:19:03,960 --> 00:19:06,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, I like three or four? Yeah, thank you?

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00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:10,400
Speaker 1: And in that first week or two?

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00:19:10,560 --> 00:19:13,600
Speaker 2: Okay, but let's let's be real, right, like, yeah, no,

375
00:19:13,720 --> 00:19:15,840
Speaker 2: you were in your right, you and I. But you

376
00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:19,000
Speaker 2: and I have been together for four and a half

377
00:19:19,080 --> 00:19:21,800
Speaker 2: years already, we're we're in what month we in?

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00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:25,399
Speaker 1: You know? Oh my goodness? No, No, I actually think

379
00:19:25,440 --> 00:19:28,960
Speaker 1: it's the funniest thing that you were such a mooth criminal.

380
00:19:29,119 --> 00:19:29,959
Speaker 2: You've got the prize?

381
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,280
Speaker 1: Oh did I get the prize? Did I lucky?

382
00:19:32,280 --> 00:19:38,000
Speaker 2: For me, the half Byron half La Sexy boyfriend prize.

383
00:19:38,680 --> 00:19:43,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, you so lucky, but no, I like it. I

384
00:19:43,760 --> 00:19:46,119
Speaker 1: think it's funny, but I also want to normalize it.

385
00:19:46,200 --> 00:19:48,920
Speaker 1: That is how people date, Like I was an anomaly

386
00:19:49,040 --> 00:19:53,480
Speaker 1: in that, like I'm extremely monogamous, whereas you were in

387
00:19:53,520 --> 00:19:56,359
Speaker 1: your single ready to mingle phase, I had no idea.

388
00:19:56,480 --> 00:19:58,959
Speaker 1: Unbeknownst to me, I was one of four girls that

389
00:19:59,040 --> 00:20:00,760
Speaker 1: you were having times.

390
00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:02,920
Speaker 2: I would actually hate to be single now.

391
00:20:04,040 --> 00:20:07,800
Speaker 1: It would be hard. But basically what happened was about

392
00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:10,400
Speaker 1: three months in, Yeah, be hard and viron be hard

393
00:20:10,400 --> 00:20:14,080
Speaker 1: in La. Two three months in I was like, hang on.

394
00:20:14,280 --> 00:20:17,320
Speaker 1: When we started dating in CA noodling, I was like,

395
00:20:17,359 --> 00:20:19,280
Speaker 1: did you hook up with anyone? You just face was

396
00:20:19,359 --> 00:20:22,240
Speaker 1: like yes, I promised myself when you asked this that

397
00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:23,879
Speaker 1: I would never lie to you. And it was kind

398
00:20:23,920 --> 00:20:26,200
Speaker 1: of like a funny moment. I mean, I love it.

399
00:20:26,280 --> 00:20:28,919
Speaker 1: I think it's kind of cool, not cool, but like

400
00:20:28,960 --> 00:20:30,520
Speaker 1: cool that you were so w tos and open with

401
00:20:30,560 --> 00:20:33,400
Speaker 1: me told you the truth, Like we hadn't given ourselves

402
00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:35,840
Speaker 1: any labels until probably even a month after that.

403
00:20:36,880 --> 00:20:41,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think we've probably talked about this anyway. But

404
00:20:42,119 --> 00:20:44,680
Speaker 2: the day that we went on that first proper.

405
00:20:44,560 --> 00:20:48,760
Speaker 1: Date, the beach day. The beach day, I dropped the

406
00:20:48,760 --> 00:20:53,640
Speaker 1: tempura out of my mouth. Yeah, you couldn't use chopsticks. Oh,

407
00:20:53,800 --> 00:20:56,639
Speaker 1: actually I missed that. What's that restaurant called is a

408
00:20:58,000 --> 00:21:03,160
Speaker 1: is a kr? It's in what's it called Itching Knee,

409
00:21:03,280 --> 00:21:05,600
Speaker 1: isn't it? It was it?

410
00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:08,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe it's called Itching Kne Okay is Okay or

411
00:21:08,560 --> 00:21:11,160
Speaker 2: something like that. Anyway, it's in Saint Kilda.

412
00:21:10,880 --> 00:21:12,560
Speaker 1: One on the beach.

413
00:21:12,720 --> 00:21:15,800
Speaker 2: Yeah right, oh god, that's so good. I miss actually

414
00:21:15,840 --> 00:21:16,520
Speaker 2: missed that place.

415
00:21:17,400 --> 00:21:18,520
Speaker 1: We'll have to go back next time.

416
00:21:18,960 --> 00:21:21,040
Speaker 2: I think we actually should. Hopefully it's still there.

417
00:21:21,760 --> 00:21:23,360
Speaker 1: Love a bit of Japanese food.

418
00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:27,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, tell you you need to go to Chef Noboo's

419
00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:28,640
Speaker 2: other restaurant.

420
00:21:28,720 --> 00:21:32,720
Speaker 1: No, I told you I went to really yummy Japanese

421
00:21:32,720 --> 00:21:37,040
Speaker 1: restaurant recently that they do the same food as like

422
00:21:37,080 --> 00:21:39,720
Speaker 1: they're the same owners as Sugarfish, but it's all hand rolls.

423
00:21:41,320 --> 00:21:44,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, I want to do Yeah Nobu's other restaurant, like

424
00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:46,159
Speaker 2: his first restaurant, whatever it is.

425
00:21:46,160 --> 00:21:48,120
Speaker 1: I feel like I should save that for your Mayboo.

426
00:21:48,320 --> 00:21:50,320
Speaker 2: No, just go enjoy it and then you can take me.

427
00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:54,320
Speaker 2: That's fine, Okay, just go do it. Okay, don't deny it,

428
00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:55,200
Speaker 2: I actually do.

429
00:21:55,560 --> 00:21:57,840
Speaker 1: I do have a format for today's chat, can I

430
00:21:57,880 --> 00:21:59,120
Speaker 1: can I take the reins a little?

431
00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:01,080
Speaker 2: Have you guys wor.

432
00:22:02,520 --> 00:22:06,400
Speaker 1: Well? In all honesty, I actually have been loving your

433
00:22:06,440 --> 00:22:09,560
Speaker 1: pod with Ilias Like I've really enjoyed it. I've like

434
00:22:10,640 --> 00:22:14,400
Speaker 1: nervous skipped a bit, like I love it. I listen

435
00:22:14,480 --> 00:22:17,200
Speaker 1: to it fully all the way through, Like I really

436
00:22:17,240 --> 00:22:20,200
Speaker 1: am enjoying it. But I'm really loving that you're both

437
00:22:20,280 --> 00:22:25,920
Speaker 1: so like open and vulnerable and honest about mental health stuff,

438
00:22:26,040 --> 00:22:29,439
Speaker 1: especially like the Sexy Times talk is funny, but it's like,

439
00:22:29,560 --> 00:22:31,920
Speaker 1: I'm really loving that, Like you both open up about

440
00:22:31,960 --> 00:22:35,680
Speaker 1: being medicated well for him, certain times for you right now,

441
00:22:36,080 --> 00:22:39,720
Speaker 1: and you talk about anxiety, panic, and depression. You touch

442
00:22:39,760 --> 00:22:42,960
Speaker 1: on these things that you know some people are talking

443
00:22:43,000 --> 00:22:45,520
Speaker 1: about more and more. But I was just hoping, could

444
00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:48,200
Speaker 1: we like have a little bit of a chat about

445
00:22:48,240 --> 00:22:49,800
Speaker 1: some of that stuff if feel comfortable?

446
00:22:49,880 --> 00:22:52,399
Speaker 2: Yes, of course, ask away, bossa Chingo.

447
00:22:53,480 --> 00:22:55,800
Speaker 1: I wanted to know, like what was one of the

448
00:22:55,840 --> 00:22:59,840
Speaker 1: catalysts that made you want to seek being or being

449
00:23:00,080 --> 00:23:06,399
Speaker 1: open to getting medicated for your anxiety? And I know

450
00:23:06,640 --> 00:23:10,800
Speaker 1: this because I love you and live with you that

451
00:23:10,880 --> 00:23:14,600
Speaker 1: there was a little bit of like apprehension beforehand. So yeah,

452
00:23:14,640 --> 00:23:16,280
Speaker 1: I guess I just want to what the catalyst to

453
00:23:16,359 --> 00:23:19,040
Speaker 1: going on You're on an SSRI, right.

454
00:23:19,000 --> 00:23:19,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, that's correct.

455
00:23:20,000 --> 00:23:22,879
Speaker 1: Yeah, what made you want to go on one of

456
00:23:22,920 --> 00:23:23,399
Speaker 1: those things?

457
00:23:23,800 --> 00:23:28,760
Speaker 2: I think for me going back, there was probably always

458
00:23:28,800 --> 00:23:35,040
Speaker 2: like a real negative connotation with going on medication, you know,

459
00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:40,920
Speaker 2: because it is you know, it's more associated with depression.

460
00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:46,600
Speaker 2: So SSRIs for depression. You know, everyone's like, when you're depressed,

461
00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:50,880
Speaker 2: you take antidepressants, but they also an anti anxiety medication.

462
00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:55,720
Speaker 2: So immediately, yeah, it was very negative connotation. Anyone that

463
00:23:55,800 --> 00:23:58,359
Speaker 2: was on medication was like, oh, you know, like something's

464
00:23:58,400 --> 00:24:00,600
Speaker 2: wrong with you or you must be really really bad,

465
00:24:01,720 --> 00:24:03,960
Speaker 2: you must really have a problem. And yeah, even the

466
00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:07,479
Speaker 2: first time you know, it was mentioned among friends and family,

467
00:24:07,560 --> 00:24:12,280
Speaker 2: it was just so almost like taboo, like you don't

468
00:24:12,320 --> 00:24:14,480
Speaker 2: do that, you don't go on medication unless there's something

469
00:24:14,520 --> 00:24:16,560
Speaker 2: really wrong with you. But I just got to the

470
00:24:16,600 --> 00:24:21,040
Speaker 2: point where it's like I tried everything, like I'd been

471
00:24:21,119 --> 00:24:24,040
Speaker 2: on that journey. I'd been you know, my entire life

472
00:24:24,080 --> 00:24:29,080
Speaker 2: having anxiety and being this semi functional person and still

473
00:24:29,080 --> 00:24:31,560
Speaker 2: doing everything in life and have an anxiety, and I

474
00:24:31,640 --> 00:24:35,320
Speaker 2: just thought, why wouldn't I actually go and try the

475
00:24:35,400 --> 00:24:38,480
Speaker 2: medication and see if it can help me, and see

476
00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:41,560
Speaker 2: if I can bring the anxiety down at least you know,

477
00:24:41,680 --> 00:24:45,720
Speaker 2: one percent or five percent or ten percent. So did

478
00:24:45,760 --> 00:24:46,040
Speaker 2: you have.

479
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:48,480
Speaker 1: A girlfriend that was really supportive of this choice?

480
00:24:48,840 --> 00:24:50,800
Speaker 2: But I think like with you as well, like I

481
00:24:50,840 --> 00:24:54,359
Speaker 2: wanted to, you know, go down all the other like,

482
00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:58,600
Speaker 2: you know, I used a lot of like your friends

483
00:24:58,600 --> 00:25:01,280
Speaker 2: and contacts, like you know, you know, the natural path

484
00:25:01,400 --> 00:25:03,359
Speaker 2: and all that kind of stuff. So like I did

485
00:25:03,600 --> 00:25:07,159
Speaker 2: all of that first until I was ready to go

486
00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:10,159
Speaker 2: down the medication path, you know. So I'm glad that

487
00:25:10,280 --> 00:25:13,600
Speaker 2: like that you that you like help me go down

488
00:25:13,600 --> 00:25:16,960
Speaker 2: that path of like getting my health really in order

489
00:25:17,400 --> 00:25:20,040
Speaker 2: before I was like, yeah, I'm ready to do the

490
00:25:20,080 --> 00:25:23,600
Speaker 2: medication stuff, you know. And it's funny because yeah, everyone

491
00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:26,200
Speaker 2: even like Chad and stuff like that, were super supportive

492
00:25:26,200 --> 00:25:27,240
Speaker 2: of the medication.

493
00:25:28,080 --> 00:25:31,439
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, totally, And I think it's more widely

494
00:25:31,480 --> 00:25:32,160
Speaker 1: talked about now.

495
00:25:32,359 --> 00:25:34,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, and even like, I'm glad that I did it

496
00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:38,600
Speaker 2: because I honestly feel like it just has settled everything

497
00:25:38,600 --> 00:25:40,480
Speaker 2: out of course.

498
00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:44,120
Speaker 1: A thousand percent adds how do you feel and I know,

499
00:25:45,480 --> 00:25:47,159
Speaker 1: I hope you're comfortable talking about this, but you do

500
00:25:47,240 --> 00:25:50,440
Speaker 1: have a fear of flying, And that was also a

501
00:25:50,480 --> 00:25:54,760
Speaker 1: big thing for going on the meds too, because obviously

502
00:25:54,760 --> 00:25:56,359
Speaker 1: I live on the other side of the world for

503
00:25:56,480 --> 00:26:01,400
Speaker 1: half of the year, and one of the reasons you're

504
00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:03,840
Speaker 1: not with me is that fear of flying. Like, yes,

505
00:26:03,920 --> 00:26:05,719
Speaker 1: you have work and other things that keep you in

506
00:26:05,840 --> 00:26:09,439
Speaker 1: Byron and the house all that kind of stuff, but

507
00:26:11,960 --> 00:26:15,359
Speaker 1: like it's me that is the flying. I fly back

508
00:26:15,400 --> 00:26:20,639
Speaker 1: to you essentially, like, do you think that that being

509
00:26:20,800 --> 00:26:24,639
Speaker 1: medicated has helped you get closer to being able to

510
00:26:24,720 --> 00:26:26,680
Speaker 1: fly a long haul flight? Yeah?

511
00:26:26,720 --> 00:26:29,520
Speaker 2: Absolutely, And look I don't actually I don't have a

512
00:26:30,280 --> 00:26:34,240
Speaker 2: fear of flying specifically, it's the fear that I have

513
00:26:34,440 --> 00:26:37,560
Speaker 2: anxiety while flying, if that makes sense.

514
00:26:37,400 --> 00:26:39,359
Speaker 1: Have a panic attack on the airplane.

515
00:26:39,440 --> 00:26:42,880
Speaker 2: So and look, the difference is that you know four

516
00:26:42,960 --> 00:26:48,600
Speaker 2: years ago and like you know, this is directly related

517
00:26:48,600 --> 00:26:51,120
Speaker 2: to having a panic attack on a flight like many

518
00:26:51,200 --> 00:26:57,639
Speaker 2: years ago, like four years ago. But you know, up

519
00:26:57,720 --> 00:27:01,159
Speaker 2: until last year, I would to keep myself and like

520
00:27:01,400 --> 00:27:04,680
Speaker 2: take every pill just to like make me fall asleep

521
00:27:04,840 --> 00:27:08,320
Speaker 2: or sonk myself out. And since going on the medication,

522
00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:11,640
Speaker 2: the last I think six or eight flights that I've

523
00:27:11,680 --> 00:27:15,400
Speaker 2: taken just to Melbourne and Sydney, I haven't actually taken anything,

524
00:27:15,520 --> 00:27:19,480
Speaker 2: so it's definitely like I've just been completely like I've

525
00:27:19,520 --> 00:27:21,960
Speaker 2: had no you know, nergen, I've had no dies a pan,

526
00:27:22,160 --> 00:27:25,320
Speaker 2: like nothing, and it's helped massively. So yeah, I do

527
00:27:25,359 --> 00:27:28,840
Speaker 2: think that I am getting closer again to getting on

528
00:27:29,160 --> 00:27:31,280
Speaker 2: a long haul flight again, you know.

529
00:27:31,200 --> 00:27:32,080
Speaker 1: With your teammate.

530
00:27:32,359 --> 00:27:34,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I'll probably just take a sleeping pill anyway

531
00:27:34,840 --> 00:27:37,639
Speaker 2: at some point and just knock myself out for a

532
00:27:37,640 --> 00:27:38,240
Speaker 2: few hours.

533
00:27:38,880 --> 00:27:41,879
Speaker 1: But I just love getting like settling in and watching

534
00:27:41,960 --> 00:27:42,680
Speaker 1: a few flicks.

535
00:27:42,760 --> 00:27:45,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, totally. And look and as I said, I did,

536
00:27:45,640 --> 00:27:49,280
Speaker 2: like I did Melbourne on my own last month, and yeah,

537
00:27:49,359 --> 00:27:52,760
Speaker 2: no medication. I did Sydney, you know, the and it's

538
00:27:52,800 --> 00:27:53,240
Speaker 2: only one.

539
00:27:53,200 --> 00:27:55,840
Speaker 1: Hour other than the other than the SSR.

540
00:27:55,760 --> 00:27:58,600
Speaker 2: Yea only the SSRIs. Yeah yeah, yeah, I take that

541
00:27:58,680 --> 00:28:01,880
Speaker 2: every single day. But yeah, no, like you know, obviously,

542
00:28:01,880 --> 00:28:05,879
Speaker 2: when we started flying together, I was pretty like zonked

543
00:28:05,880 --> 00:28:10,840
Speaker 2: out and pretty high on you know, vannergen and other

544
00:28:10,920 --> 00:28:14,760
Speaker 2: kind of stuff to help me relax. But I definitely

545
00:28:14,760 --> 00:28:18,240
Speaker 2: feel better and I feel better flying not off my

546
00:28:18,320 --> 00:28:20,320
Speaker 2: face and not sleepy and all that kind of feeling.

547
00:28:20,960 --> 00:28:22,640
Speaker 2: So yes, does that answer your question?

548
00:28:22,760 --> 00:28:25,880
Speaker 1: Am We don't fight that often, Dear sir, we don't

549
00:28:25,920 --> 00:28:29,200
Speaker 1: fight very often. But when you get fucking snappy is

550
00:28:29,240 --> 00:28:32,879
Speaker 1: at an airport? I've learned No, no, I know. But

551
00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:35,560
Speaker 1: now that I've learned, like remember as well, Like I'm

552
00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:39,600
Speaker 1: someone that doesn't experience flight anxiety, even on bad flights,

553
00:28:39,640 --> 00:28:41,560
Speaker 1: Like the worst thing I'll get is diarrhea, Like that

554
00:28:41,720 --> 00:28:45,200
Speaker 1: is my version of feeling stressed on an aeroplane. But

555
00:28:45,360 --> 00:28:48,240
Speaker 1: other than that, like I'll get on an aeroplane and be like, oh, adventure,

556
00:28:48,280 --> 00:28:50,960
Speaker 1: how exciting for me? Like I have almost the opposite

557
00:28:50,960 --> 00:28:56,080
Speaker 1: feeling to you, like viscerally, energetically, mentally, And so I

558
00:28:56,320 --> 00:29:00,240
Speaker 1: was until I met you. I have I hadn't ever

559
00:29:01,440 --> 00:29:03,520
Speaker 1: people had told me they were afraid of fly, like

560
00:29:03,800 --> 00:29:07,920
Speaker 1: and get anxiety around flights and panic around flights, but

561
00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:10,400
Speaker 1: I'd never experienced it, and I'd never seen it, or

562
00:29:10,480 --> 00:29:13,040
Speaker 1: I'd been unaware unaware of it. So when I did

563
00:29:13,080 --> 00:29:15,800
Speaker 1: see it firsthand with you, it was a whole new

564
00:29:15,880 --> 00:29:19,440
Speaker 1: experience for me. And I at the beginning probably wasn't

565
00:29:19,440 --> 00:29:23,320
Speaker 1: empathetic enough towards you, because when I fly, I have

566
00:29:23,480 --> 00:29:26,440
Speaker 1: the opposite to I'm like, oh, I love this, you know,

567
00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:31,560
Speaker 1: and so like, and that's on me for not being

568
00:29:31,600 --> 00:29:33,280
Speaker 1: as supportive as I could have been at the start.

569
00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:35,720
Speaker 1: I do think I'm getting a lot better at supporting

570
00:29:35,720 --> 00:29:38,520
Speaker 1: you when you fly. There were a few bumpy times

571
00:29:38,560 --> 00:29:39,320
Speaker 1: at the start.

572
00:29:39,040 --> 00:29:41,240
Speaker 2: Where I was like, hope, you're mean and you're like,

573
00:29:41,400 --> 00:29:44,280
Speaker 2: you're not supportive, you know, totally. But I think that, like,

574
00:29:44,360 --> 00:29:48,760
Speaker 2: you're also dealing with a person that a is like

575
00:29:48,920 --> 00:29:52,400
Speaker 2: having anxiety. So when they are having anxiety, you know,

576
00:29:52,480 --> 00:29:55,400
Speaker 2: the world kind of gets really narrow around you, and

577
00:29:55,480 --> 00:29:59,520
Speaker 2: you kind of have this really small tunnel tunnel vision

578
00:29:59,560 --> 00:30:02,880
Speaker 2: of just get on the flight and just sit there

579
00:30:02,960 --> 00:30:05,240
Speaker 2: and just white knuckle it and just do it and

580
00:30:05,320 --> 00:30:07,400
Speaker 2: then it's done and then you're in the place where

581
00:30:07,400 --> 00:30:09,880
Speaker 2: you're going and then it's all good. And then you

582
00:30:10,000 --> 00:30:15,280
Speaker 2: kind of mix that with taking, you know, whatever medication

583
00:30:15,400 --> 00:30:17,760
Speaker 2: you're taking to try to relax you, and you've got

584
00:30:17,800 --> 00:30:21,440
Speaker 2: suddenly got this like tunnel vision and you're kind of

585
00:30:21,520 --> 00:30:25,560
Speaker 2: high as a kite just floating through the airport trying

586
00:30:25,600 --> 00:30:29,880
Speaker 2: to relax yourself. And yeah, it's I suppose a little

587
00:30:29,880 --> 00:30:34,240
Speaker 2: bit hard to when you are experiencing the anxiety be

588
00:30:34,400 --> 00:30:39,880
Speaker 2: aware or be you know, you know, not empathetic, but

589
00:30:39,960 --> 00:30:43,520
Speaker 2: like sympathetic to the people around you that they're experiencing

590
00:30:43,560 --> 00:30:47,480
Speaker 2: you in a different kind of headspace. So when we traveled,

591
00:30:47,520 --> 00:30:49,840
Speaker 2: you were kind of seeing me in a hot on.

592
00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:52,360
Speaker 2: This isn't like a normal mat. This is like a

593
00:30:52,480 --> 00:30:59,120
Speaker 2: very heightened anxiety mat and a slightly medicated mat. So yeah, yeah,

594
00:30:58,720 --> 00:31:01,840
Speaker 2: it is. It is different. But then in time I

595
00:31:01,920 --> 00:31:04,000
Speaker 2: was like, hey, just let you know, I'm about to

596
00:31:04,000 --> 00:31:06,680
Speaker 2: take a pill. So if you want to talk, talk now.

597
00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:08,920
Speaker 2: If not, I can't string a sentence together.

598
00:31:10,000 --> 00:31:13,760
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, I've learned. I've learned. I've learned your ways. Boom,

599
00:31:14,200 --> 00:31:14,800
Speaker 1: learn your ways.

600
00:31:14,840 --> 00:31:16,680
Speaker 2: But I mean, yeah, look the last time we went

601
00:31:16,720 --> 00:31:19,040
Speaker 2: to Melbourne, I didn't take anything. And then yeah, the

602
00:31:19,080 --> 00:31:22,080
Speaker 2: six other flights after that, I didn't take anything. So

603
00:31:22,760 --> 00:31:31,760
Speaker 2: just six yeah, well okay, four, five, six?

604
00:31:31,920 --> 00:31:35,240
Speaker 1: Have you done? Have you done? Six flights? Boo? Yeah,

605
00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:38,840
Speaker 1: it's a lot. Yeah, on my own, I have not

606
00:31:38,920 --> 00:31:42,360
Speaker 1: taken a flight since I got to la Yeah.

607
00:31:42,200 --> 00:31:44,840
Speaker 2: Okay, no, no, maybe it's six in total, including the

608
00:31:44,840 --> 00:31:45,400
Speaker 2: one with you.

609
00:31:46,240 --> 00:31:46,760
Speaker 1: Oh got you?

610
00:31:47,000 --> 00:31:48,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, got you? Yeah? Yeah, So you and I to

611
00:31:48,680 --> 00:31:51,000
Speaker 2: Melbourne back and forth, then I went to Sydney and

612
00:31:51,040 --> 00:31:53,840
Speaker 2: then I went back to Melbourne. So that's six oh

613
00:31:53,920 --> 00:31:57,400
Speaker 2: yeah for Easter. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah yeah.

614
00:31:57,480 --> 00:32:02,640
Speaker 1: Can I ask like, do you like because when we

615
00:32:02,800 --> 00:32:05,920
Speaker 1: got together was when you started to feel like panic

616
00:32:05,960 --> 00:32:09,120
Speaker 1: attacks and anxiety attack. What's the difference been an anxiety

617
00:32:09,120 --> 00:32:10,200
Speaker 1: attack and a panic attack?

618
00:32:10,520 --> 00:32:13,360
Speaker 2: I think you can. You can just experience anxiety and

619
00:32:13,520 --> 00:32:18,200
Speaker 2: have anxiety as a feeling within your body, so kind

620
00:32:18,200 --> 00:32:23,200
Speaker 2: of starting to have those symptoms of anywhere from breath, yeah,

621
00:32:23,200 --> 00:32:27,960
Speaker 2: but anywhere from just like nervousness and uncomfortability in your

622
00:32:27,960 --> 00:32:30,560
Speaker 2: mind starts raising and all those kinds of things. And

623
00:32:30,600 --> 00:32:34,080
Speaker 2: a panic attack is you're like fully in it, so

624
00:32:34,120 --> 00:32:37,400
Speaker 2: it's like one hundred percent, you're just like you're going hard.

625
00:32:38,840 --> 00:32:41,080
Speaker 1: And remember when we first started dating, you had a

626
00:32:41,080 --> 00:32:44,880
Speaker 1: panic attack at dinner. Do you remember that? Yeah? Can

627
00:32:44,880 --> 00:32:46,840
Speaker 1: you share a little bit about like what was going

628
00:32:46,880 --> 00:32:47,400
Speaker 1: on for you.

629
00:32:47,400 --> 00:32:52,000
Speaker 2: There as like a whole or just specifically in that moment?

630
00:32:54,080 --> 00:32:57,440
Speaker 1: Well, I imagine like you got shortness of breath. Yeah.

631
00:32:57,520 --> 00:32:59,680
Speaker 2: Look, I started I started to feel that shortness of

632
00:32:59,680 --> 00:33:05,640
Speaker 2: breath and I felt like I couldn't breathe, I couldn't swallow.

633
00:33:07,200 --> 00:33:11,240
Speaker 2: I was completely disconnected from my mind and my body.

634
00:33:11,880 --> 00:33:14,840
Speaker 2: I didn't have the tools even four years ago, four

635
00:33:14,840 --> 00:33:16,760
Speaker 2: and a half years ago to deal with it like

636
00:33:16,840 --> 00:33:21,320
Speaker 2: I do now. So my initial reaction was like, I

637
00:33:21,320 --> 00:33:23,920
Speaker 2: need to get the fuck out of here. I had

638
00:33:24,000 --> 00:33:27,640
Speaker 2: no tools of even just you know, I've still done

639
00:33:27,640 --> 00:33:30,280
Speaker 2: a lot of therapy and stuff, but I wasn't specifically

640
00:33:30,320 --> 00:33:34,080
Speaker 2: dealing with my anxiety at that time. I was literally

641
00:33:34,120 --> 00:33:36,240
Speaker 2: just being like, well, I'm a person that has anxiety,

642
00:33:36,280 --> 00:33:39,080
Speaker 2: and like, that's it, you know, you deal with it?

643
00:33:39,160 --> 00:33:41,640
Speaker 1: Or what do you think triggered that one?

644
00:33:43,040 --> 00:33:45,200
Speaker 2: Oh geez, how long do we have? We probably need

645
00:33:45,200 --> 00:33:47,320
Speaker 2: a whole nother podcast on just that one night.

646
00:33:47,880 --> 00:33:49,960
Speaker 1: Do you think it was like new love? Do you

647
00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:52,640
Speaker 1: think I think a restaurant that you used to go

648
00:33:52,680 --> 00:33:54,960
Speaker 1: to with an X? Like, what do you think it was?

649
00:33:55,200 --> 00:33:57,600
Speaker 2: I think I think it's a mixture of all that

650
00:33:57,720 --> 00:34:00,280
Speaker 2: kind of thing. I think that, you know, as a

651
00:34:00,320 --> 00:34:06,800
Speaker 2: quick overview, I was in a new relationship. I probably

652
00:34:06,800 --> 00:34:09,879
Speaker 2: didn't fully understand what that with you, Yes, And then

653
00:34:09,920 --> 00:34:13,400
Speaker 2: I fully probably didn't fully understand what that meant. I

654
00:34:13,520 --> 00:34:20,920
Speaker 2: knew that things were going to change very very quickly. Yeah,

655
00:34:21,000 --> 00:34:23,839
Speaker 2: I knew that. And then I was also a little

656
00:34:23,880 --> 00:34:26,400
Speaker 2: bit afraid of that. I was like, wow, so like

657
00:34:26,480 --> 00:34:29,360
Speaker 2: this person is going to come in, everything's going to

658
00:34:29,440 --> 00:34:32,840
Speaker 2: change in a good way, not in a bad way.

659
00:34:33,280 --> 00:34:36,000
Speaker 2: But then I was like I just you know, gotten

660
00:34:36,040 --> 00:34:38,640
Speaker 2: super comfortable with who I am and my identity, and

661
00:34:38,680 --> 00:34:42,239
Speaker 2: then everything's going to change again. Then I'm in a relationship,

662
00:34:42,280 --> 00:34:44,359
Speaker 2: and then you've got a green card, and then you're

663
00:34:44,360 --> 00:34:46,480
Speaker 2: doing this, and then you're doing that, and I was like, oh,

664
00:34:46,560 --> 00:34:48,040
Speaker 2: I don't know what life's going to be. I don't

665
00:34:48,040 --> 00:34:50,360
Speaker 2: know how it's going to look. So that definitely, so

666
00:34:50,719 --> 00:34:55,640
Speaker 2: the uncertainty kind of yeah, yeah, definitely, that was definitely

667
00:34:56,000 --> 00:34:56,719
Speaker 2: a part of it.

668
00:34:57,280 --> 00:35:00,279
Speaker 1: And it's so funny because when I met you not

669
00:35:00,320 --> 00:35:02,400
Speaker 1: get that feeling that anything would change. Like I was

670
00:35:02,440 --> 00:35:04,320
Speaker 1: just like, let's just see where what unfolds.

671
00:35:05,160 --> 00:35:07,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, totally. I didn't think I was like that. I

672
00:35:07,160 --> 00:35:11,560
Speaker 2: think I was like, oh shit, this is something. Everything's

673
00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:14,759
Speaker 2: going to change and life is going to well, life's gone.

674
00:35:14,760 --> 00:35:16,400
Speaker 2: I knew that life was going to go in a

675
00:35:16,880 --> 00:35:19,640
Speaker 2: not a different direction, but it's going to take its

676
00:35:19,640 --> 00:35:22,839
Speaker 2: own path and it has like look at where we are,

677
00:35:22,960 --> 00:35:26,560
Speaker 2: like you oversee Byron. I never thought i'd live out

678
00:35:26,560 --> 00:35:30,160
Speaker 2: of Melbourne. We lived in Talkie together, like then we

679
00:35:30,600 --> 00:35:33,400
Speaker 2: you know, we've been in Byron for I mean almost

680
00:35:33,560 --> 00:35:36,080
Speaker 2: three years the end of this year, it's been two

681
00:35:36,160 --> 00:35:37,239
Speaker 2: and a half years.

682
00:35:38,000 --> 00:35:40,279
Speaker 1: Yeah you have. I've definitely not been there for that.

683
00:35:40,480 --> 00:35:43,560
Speaker 2: Well, yeah, you've been half the time. Like we've we've

684
00:35:43,960 --> 00:35:47,319
Speaker 2: set things up, we own things together where like we've

685
00:35:47,320 --> 00:35:51,680
Speaker 2: got embryos where I kind of knew all that, And

686
00:35:51,960 --> 00:35:56,080
Speaker 2: to be honest, I probably wasn't really I think you

687
00:35:56,120 --> 00:35:59,919
Speaker 2: were also the first relationship and person that i'd been

688
00:36:00,120 --> 00:36:02,120
Speaker 2: with it I was like, oh, okay, maybe this is

689
00:36:02,200 --> 00:36:05,240
Speaker 2: real and maybe this is serious, and I was probably

690
00:36:05,280 --> 00:36:08,320
Speaker 2: not really well yeah, and I probably like probably wasn't

691
00:36:08,320 --> 00:36:12,600
Speaker 2: completely ready for that, to be honest, and not in

692
00:36:12,640 --> 00:36:15,279
Speaker 2: a bad way, but I think just mentally being like,

693
00:36:15,360 --> 00:36:19,200
Speaker 2: oh okay, this is real. So if like if we

694
00:36:19,640 --> 00:36:24,040
Speaker 2: you know, whatever happened, whatever happens now is probably like

695
00:36:24,080 --> 00:36:27,120
Speaker 2: a real, real relationship, as opposed to the other ones

696
00:36:27,160 --> 00:36:29,719
Speaker 2: where I always knew that they would end at some

697
00:36:29,880 --> 00:36:32,120
Speaker 2: stage or they just weren't serious relationships.

698
00:36:33,280 --> 00:36:35,839
Speaker 1: Fascinating. I just find human behavior is so fascinating. So

699
00:36:35,880 --> 00:36:37,880
Speaker 1: for me, I never had any of those feeling like

700
00:36:38,080 --> 00:36:38,440
Speaker 1: I was.

701
00:36:38,440 --> 00:36:43,280
Speaker 2: Just like you loved it. You were just like so happy,

702
00:36:43,400 --> 00:36:46,360
Speaker 2: just with everything. Just to go with it, go with

703
00:36:46,400 --> 00:36:46,800
Speaker 2: the floor.

704
00:36:46,840 --> 00:36:49,240
Speaker 1: I just think, jump, you know what I mean. I'm like, well,

705
00:36:50,280 --> 00:36:55,719
Speaker 1: the worst thing that happens is like things change down

706
00:36:55,760 --> 00:36:58,080
Speaker 1: the lot, like I don't know, I just don't. I mean,

707
00:36:58,080 --> 00:37:00,640
Speaker 1: but I am that person that's like listening heart than.

708
00:37:00,520 --> 00:37:04,280
Speaker 2: Act like you're also that way. You're also the driving

709
00:37:04,360 --> 00:37:07,040
Speaker 2: force like in the relationship quite a lot.

710
00:37:07,560 --> 00:37:10,400
Speaker 1: Oh no, I literally remember saying. I remember sitting in

711
00:37:10,440 --> 00:37:12,800
Speaker 1: my car. I remember I had to deal with Honda

712
00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:17,360
Speaker 1: and I was driving that Honda HRV or something, and

713
00:37:17,360 --> 00:37:18,560
Speaker 1: I remember looking at you.

714
00:37:19,800 --> 00:37:21,600
Speaker 2: What was that was it? It's a Mitsubishi.

715
00:37:22,520 --> 00:37:25,160
Speaker 1: Oh, Mitsubishi Ax, That's what I thought you said having

716
00:37:25,239 --> 00:37:27,239
Speaker 1: sex And I was like, are we sharing that on

717
00:37:27,280 --> 00:37:35,120
Speaker 1: the podcast? But I remember looking at you and going, fuck,

718
00:37:35,400 --> 00:37:37,759
Speaker 1: just jump, like what's the worst that can happen? I go,

719
00:37:37,880 --> 00:37:39,520
Speaker 1: And you just looked at me and I go, what

720
00:37:39,560 --> 00:37:41,760
Speaker 1: are you feeling? And You're like like I'm fucked.

721
00:37:42,320 --> 00:37:44,000
Speaker 2: Yeah. I knew I was fucked because I was like,

722
00:37:44,400 --> 00:37:49,719
Speaker 2: let this this person like kind of you know, not

723
00:37:49,840 --> 00:37:53,200
Speaker 2: take the lead, but just you know, help like guide

724
00:37:53,239 --> 00:37:55,440
Speaker 2: me down this new kind of path and I was.

725
00:37:55,600 --> 00:37:57,719
Speaker 2: I was happy with that as well.

726
00:37:57,719 --> 00:38:00,719
Speaker 1: But am I like your Hagrid? Yeah?

727
00:38:00,960 --> 00:38:02,320
Speaker 2: Taking me to wisdom School?

728
00:38:02,960 --> 00:38:06,759
Speaker 1: Yeah, come with me. It's all right, Harry, what's You're

729
00:38:06,800 --> 00:38:08,000
Speaker 1: a wizard?

730
00:38:08,680 --> 00:38:11,000
Speaker 2: Uh No? And I I kind knew that with you

731
00:38:11,080 --> 00:38:14,040
Speaker 2: so and as I said, I was happy to have

732
00:38:14,160 --> 00:38:16,440
Speaker 2: it a jump. But yeah, oh my god, like fear

733
00:38:17,120 --> 00:38:20,359
Speaker 2: anxiety I could have just because I could have just

734
00:38:21,000 --> 00:38:23,680
Speaker 2: been a very normal, comfortable life.

735
00:38:24,120 --> 00:38:27,040
Speaker 1: And maybe, well maybe I was meant to come into

736
00:38:27,120 --> 00:38:27,640
Speaker 1: your world.

737
00:38:27,840 --> 00:38:30,399
Speaker 2: Well I think you were, because I do love this

738
00:38:30,520 --> 00:38:34,000
Speaker 2: new life and world that we have created together. Like

739
00:38:34,000 --> 00:38:36,120
Speaker 2: I genuinely you.

740
00:38:35,920 --> 00:38:38,600
Speaker 1: Suit Byron Bay like nobody else.

741
00:38:38,960 --> 00:38:43,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, and how lucky that you and I at points

742
00:38:43,920 --> 00:38:45,960
Speaker 2: in our future we're always going to get to come

743
00:38:46,000 --> 00:38:49,040
Speaker 2: back here for x amount of time, you know, I

744
00:38:49,080 --> 00:38:51,720
Speaker 2: know it's such a fun and it's like after after

745
00:38:52,080 --> 00:38:54,600
Speaker 2: you know you're doing everything and travel and everything, Oh,

746
00:38:54,719 --> 00:38:56,759
Speaker 2: just pop back into Byron for a little month or

747
00:38:56,800 --> 00:38:58,440
Speaker 2: two and have a little bit of.

748
00:39:00,120 --> 00:39:03,720
Speaker 1: Even like here. Like there are some some some days

749
00:39:03,760 --> 00:39:05,960
Speaker 1: in LA are tough, Like if I'm working at the

750
00:39:06,040 --> 00:39:09,040
Speaker 1: yoga studio and cleaning bathrooms or something, I'm like pulling

751
00:39:09,120 --> 00:39:12,319
Speaker 1: hair out of a shower drain cleaning it, and I'm

752
00:39:12,360 --> 00:39:19,720
Speaker 1: like it's okay, We've got the buyer and like face, yeah.

753
00:39:19,120 --> 00:39:21,680
Speaker 2: You've never pulled hair out of our drains at home.

754
00:39:22,840 --> 00:39:26,280
Speaker 1: I'm pro now so and so, to be full disclosure,

755
00:39:26,320 --> 00:39:29,000
Speaker 1: I work at a yoga studio here in LA, but

756
00:39:29,040 --> 00:39:32,120
Speaker 1: I work front desk. And when you're front desk, when

757
00:39:32,160 --> 00:39:34,360
Speaker 1: people are in class, you have to like on the

758
00:39:34,400 --> 00:39:37,319
Speaker 1: time I clean the studio that's not in class and

759
00:39:37,520 --> 00:39:40,120
Speaker 1: check that the bathrooms and everything is all clean. It's

760
00:39:40,200 --> 00:39:42,600
Speaker 1: just like what part of the job I'm doing an

761
00:39:42,640 --> 00:39:44,920
Speaker 1: audition to teach there in a couple of days, but

762
00:39:45,080 --> 00:39:48,160
Speaker 1: like I applied thinking front desk, but it's kind of

763
00:39:48,200 --> 00:39:51,879
Speaker 1: front desk slash cleaner essentially. And so some days I'll

764
00:39:51,920 --> 00:39:55,880
Speaker 1: be like Matt, and you know, minimum wage in America

765
00:39:55,960 --> 00:39:58,640
Speaker 1: is like full on compared to what it is in Australia,

766
00:39:58,719 --> 00:40:01,360
Speaker 1: and so I'm just like O, it's really confronting. But

767
00:40:01,360 --> 00:40:04,080
Speaker 1: then when I'm like, oh, you know, like knowing that

768
00:40:04,160 --> 00:40:07,840
Speaker 1: we have a little like haven, yeah that is you

769
00:40:08,080 --> 00:40:11,239
Speaker 1: and Byron Bay, like that feels really nice when like

770
00:40:11,440 --> 00:40:13,439
Speaker 1: it feels like your back's up against the wall because

771
00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:17,440
Speaker 1: La is like brutal, Like it's beautiful, but it is brutal,

772
00:40:17,480 --> 00:40:21,040
Speaker 1: and like until I get that first acting gig, my

773
00:40:21,120 --> 00:40:24,680
Speaker 1: back's up against a wall, like I'm like hustling and grinding,

774
00:40:24,680 --> 00:40:26,640
Speaker 1: but like you just don't know what's going to stick,

775
00:40:26,719 --> 00:40:31,000
Speaker 1: and so you the struggle is real, essentially, and you

776
00:40:31,000 --> 00:40:33,359
Speaker 1: can see why so many people give up because it's

777
00:40:33,400 --> 00:40:33,920
Speaker 1: so hard.

778
00:40:34,239 --> 00:40:37,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, I totally get that, and I'm very very

779
00:40:37,360 --> 00:40:37,840
Speaker 2: proud of you.

780
00:40:39,120 --> 00:40:39,440
Speaker 1: Thanks.

781
00:40:39,560 --> 00:40:42,319
Speaker 2: Yeah. I also think that this is like your time

782
00:40:42,360 --> 00:40:44,360
Speaker 2: in life that you're meant to be doing this, and

783
00:40:44,440 --> 00:40:49,640
Speaker 2: I'm also meant to be here supporting you on your journey.

784
00:40:49,880 --> 00:40:51,840
Speaker 1: From Afar from Afar.

785
00:40:52,520 --> 00:40:55,160
Speaker 2: Well, I'm working pretty hard too on my dreams, so

786
00:40:56,480 --> 00:40:56,759
Speaker 2: I know.

787
00:40:56,920 --> 00:40:58,680
Speaker 1: And that's what I wanted to ask you about. Actually,

788
00:40:58,760 --> 00:41:00,680
Speaker 1: I just want to say, like you're doing so much

789
00:41:00,719 --> 00:41:03,279
Speaker 1: composing right now, and ever since I met you, I

790
00:41:03,320 --> 00:41:08,120
Speaker 1: know that composing has been like one of your ultimate dreams, Like,

791
00:41:08,160 --> 00:41:10,839
Speaker 1: and you're now composing. I think four TV shows at

792
00:41:10,840 --> 00:41:15,720
Speaker 1: the moment, three three, three, but have applied to compose

793
00:41:15,800 --> 00:41:16,320
Speaker 1: for a fourth.

794
00:41:17,640 --> 00:41:19,680
Speaker 2: There was talks for a fourth, but I'm not doing

795
00:41:19,719 --> 00:41:20,120
Speaker 2: a fourth.

796
00:41:20,760 --> 00:41:24,560
Speaker 1: Okay, three three that's still amazing and like you've had

797
00:41:24,600 --> 00:41:27,200
Speaker 1: your you know, you've had a scene con sex life

798
00:41:27,200 --> 00:41:30,759
Speaker 1: of college girls, Like you're doing amazing things in this

799
00:41:30,840 --> 00:41:33,440
Speaker 1: realm that was like such a dream of yours. Like,

800
00:41:33,520 --> 00:41:36,399
Speaker 1: how does it feel to have gone from like, oh,

801
00:41:36,480 --> 00:41:39,480
Speaker 1: I think I want to compose to fuck I'm composing.

802
00:41:39,600 --> 00:41:43,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I mean yeah, it feels pretty amazing to

803
00:41:43,719 --> 00:41:48,160
Speaker 2: be able to do it. I love that I'm learning

804
00:41:48,239 --> 00:41:50,560
Speaker 2: at an exponential rate right now.

805
00:41:51,880 --> 00:41:54,560
Speaker 1: Because you're learning on the job essentially.

806
00:41:54,200 --> 00:41:57,560
Speaker 2: Right totally. Yeah. Yeah. So it's funny because like everything

807
00:41:57,560 --> 00:42:01,080
Speaker 2: I've done is like given me the skills and you know,

808
00:42:01,200 --> 00:42:03,680
Speaker 2: leading up to this moment. But I feel like I'm

809
00:42:03,800 --> 00:42:08,239
Speaker 2: learning more and quicker than I've ever learned in my

810
00:42:08,440 --> 00:42:12,040
Speaker 2: entire like life and career, and for the first time

811
00:42:12,160 --> 00:42:16,520
Speaker 2: having and working with people that I probably consider, you know,

812
00:42:16,920 --> 00:42:18,759
Speaker 2: people that I look up to a little bit more

813
00:42:19,200 --> 00:42:21,799
Speaker 2: and men sit mentors, yeah, and sit and really like

814
00:42:21,880 --> 00:42:24,160
Speaker 2: listen to what they have to say. And I know

815
00:42:24,280 --> 00:42:27,680
Speaker 2: that everything that I'm doing right now is leading me

816
00:42:27,840 --> 00:42:32,000
Speaker 2: to bigger and better and that's that's a pretty cool,

817
00:42:32,239 --> 00:42:33,120
Speaker 2: pretty cool feeling.

818
00:42:34,239 --> 00:42:34,960
Speaker 1: Oh, I love that.

819
00:42:35,200 --> 00:42:35,520
Speaker 2: Yeah.

820
00:42:35,560 --> 00:42:39,400
Speaker 1: What what is what genre is your favorite to compose

821
00:42:39,480 --> 00:42:40,279
Speaker 1: for and right for?

822
00:42:41,320 --> 00:42:45,400
Speaker 2: My genre in the show or movie or sound.

823
00:42:46,760 --> 00:42:48,680
Speaker 1: Like thematic sound.

824
00:42:48,680 --> 00:42:55,480
Speaker 2: Yeah dark, yeah, dark and Batman dark. Yeah. But and

825
00:42:55,520 --> 00:42:57,480
Speaker 2: I and I I probably have to struggle a little

826
00:42:57,520 --> 00:43:00,759
Speaker 2: bit harder anytime something's like a bit happier, a bit fun,

827
00:43:00,880 --> 00:43:07,080
Speaker 2: a bit quirky. Yeah, no, I'm terrible at that, but yeah,

828
00:43:08,040 --> 00:43:11,960
Speaker 2: roody like rudy, dark and real soundscape and that that

829
00:43:12,040 --> 00:43:15,239
Speaker 2: kind of thing. That's what I love. And yeah, I

830
00:43:15,239 --> 00:43:19,040
Speaker 2: think that there's definitely more opportunity for me in that

831
00:43:19,160 --> 00:43:21,080
Speaker 2: kind of space where I don't think i'll ever be.

832
00:43:23,040 --> 00:43:24,960
Speaker 2: I am working on one show that's I don't want

833
00:43:24,960 --> 00:43:27,239
Speaker 2: to say cookie cutter, but it is very it's a

834
00:43:27,280 --> 00:43:32,800
Speaker 2: little bit more standard composing cookie cutter stuff. And although

835
00:43:33,600 --> 00:43:37,040
Speaker 2: like I'm learning so much and it's really pushing me

836
00:43:37,080 --> 00:43:38,839
Speaker 2: out of my comfort zone. I was like, yeah, it's

837
00:43:38,840 --> 00:43:42,960
Speaker 2: great to do that, but my actual passion is, you know,

838
00:43:42,960 --> 00:43:45,399
Speaker 2: when I get to do the moody are stuff.

839
00:43:46,080 --> 00:43:49,239
Speaker 1: Like you'd want to compose for a movie one day

840
00:43:49,320 --> 00:43:54,520
Speaker 1: or a TV show like like the composer on the Mandalorium,

841
00:43:54,560 --> 00:43:57,480
Speaker 1: which I'm obsessed with at the moment. Ludwig our mate,

842
00:43:57,600 --> 00:44:00,040
Speaker 1: well not our mate, you who you and I both.

843
00:44:00,120 --> 00:44:03,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, yeah, that would be amazing. But you know,

844
00:44:03,480 --> 00:44:09,479
Speaker 2: even remember that show Chernobyl. Yeah yeah, so something like that,

845
00:44:09,560 --> 00:44:11,640
Speaker 2: like that's so like dark and scary.

846
00:44:11,800 --> 00:44:14,719
Speaker 1: That's isn't that the same? That's Johann right, that's the

847
00:44:14,760 --> 00:44:19,360
Speaker 1: same Hilda Hilda. Oh so that's the same composer as Sacario.

848
00:44:19,719 --> 00:44:21,280
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, she worked on Sacario.

849
00:44:21,520 --> 00:44:25,440
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, apparently, so she writes this really dark dark

850
00:44:25,560 --> 00:44:31,400
Speaker 1: I think her co composer THO was Johann. Yeah, but

851
00:44:32,080 --> 00:44:34,799
Speaker 1: apparently I listened to a podcast and she writes this

852
00:44:34,920 --> 00:44:38,040
Speaker 1: really dark music rocks into the podcast Yoga Matt under

853
00:44:38,040 --> 00:44:42,239
Speaker 1: one arm, Hi, guys, super positive. It writes, is like

854
00:44:43,239 --> 00:44:45,480
Speaker 1: painful dark, like.

855
00:44:45,480 --> 00:44:47,359
Speaker 2: That's how I feel. I'm like, I don't know where.

856
00:44:47,360 --> 00:44:50,760
Speaker 2: It's like real painful, like just like sound and music

857
00:44:50,840 --> 00:44:54,000
Speaker 2: comes from. But yeah, it comes from deep within. It's

858
00:44:54,040 --> 00:44:58,160
Speaker 2: like my my outlet, I honestly think inside.

859
00:44:59,040 --> 00:45:02,040
Speaker 1: I honestly think you're to make it so quickly, like

860
00:45:02,120 --> 00:45:05,440
Speaker 1: if you decide to come to LA at some stage,

861
00:45:05,520 --> 00:45:07,880
Speaker 1: like I do think you're going to get so many wins.

862
00:45:08,120 --> 00:45:09,920
Speaker 1: You've got teicly got so much more credits than what

863
00:45:09,960 --> 00:45:10,760
Speaker 1: I do as an actor.

864
00:45:10,920 --> 00:45:13,200
Speaker 2: You know, well that was also my biggest goal for

865
00:45:13,640 --> 00:45:18,239
Speaker 2: this year is to actually develop the credits and get

866
00:45:18,400 --> 00:45:21,360
Speaker 2: get shows under my belt and have more of a

867
00:45:21,400 --> 00:45:24,200
Speaker 2: show reel in the composing space and be like, Yep,

868
00:45:24,280 --> 00:45:26,200
Speaker 2: this is what I've done. I've done you know, five

869
00:45:26,280 --> 00:45:30,000
Speaker 2: shows in you know, three four months or whatever. It

870
00:45:30,080 --> 00:45:35,960
Speaker 2: is so good and having like really cool music that

871
00:45:36,000 --> 00:45:38,640
Speaker 2: I'm super proud of and not just like the cookie

872
00:45:38,680 --> 00:45:41,680
Speaker 2: cutter like stuff that anyone can do, like my own

873
00:45:41,800 --> 00:45:43,560
Speaker 2: sound and my own expertise.

874
00:45:44,200 --> 00:45:46,160
Speaker 1: So yeah, yeah, and I think it sounds like you're

875
00:45:46,160 --> 00:45:49,640
Speaker 1: totally forming that while still learning the skills at the

876
00:45:49,640 --> 00:45:50,160
Speaker 1: same time.

877
00:45:50,320 --> 00:45:51,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

878
00:45:51,960 --> 00:45:53,160
Speaker 1: Did you like your rain stick?

879
00:45:53,200 --> 00:45:55,280
Speaker 2: I think I love it. I can't wait to record

880
00:45:55,280 --> 00:45:58,680
Speaker 2: it this weekend. Are you gonna yeah yeah, yeah, yeah,

881
00:45:58,719 --> 00:46:01,080
Speaker 2: where we've got to ask? Yeah, one of their co

882
00:46:01,080 --> 00:46:03,279
Speaker 2: composers on one of the shows is coming to buy

883
00:46:03,280 --> 00:46:06,480
Speaker 2: Iron and on Friday, how cold. So we're going to

884
00:46:06,480 --> 00:46:10,759
Speaker 2: write some music over the weekend together. Okay, Yeah, that's

885
00:46:11,160 --> 00:46:13,160
Speaker 2: that's very exciting. But that's very exciting.

886
00:46:13,560 --> 00:46:16,360
Speaker 1: So I thank you for sharing all that, because I

887
00:46:16,400 --> 00:46:18,160
Speaker 1: was really excited to like unpack a bit of the

888
00:46:18,160 --> 00:46:22,080
Speaker 1: composing and you like getting so close to your dreams

889
00:46:22,160 --> 00:46:24,320
Speaker 1: or you're already kind of like really on the path

890
00:46:24,440 --> 00:46:27,799
Speaker 1: for them. I've also got questions that have come through

891
00:46:27,880 --> 00:46:30,480
Speaker 1: on IG before I do that, did you want to

892
00:46:30,520 --> 00:46:31,360
Speaker 1: ask me anything?

893
00:46:31,800 --> 00:46:36,920
Speaker 2: Well, I just want to know do you still love me? Yes,

894
00:46:37,680 --> 00:46:40,040
Speaker 2: that's it, that's all I want to know. That's the

895
00:46:40,080 --> 00:46:43,160
Speaker 2: only question for That's my only question. Yeah, that's nice.

896
00:46:43,160 --> 00:46:44,239
Speaker 1: You know what I said at the top of this

897
00:46:44,280 --> 00:46:46,400
Speaker 1: podcast before we hit record, I was like, Boss, don't

898
00:46:46,400 --> 00:46:49,399
Speaker 1: make it just me interviewing you. I've said this good.

899
00:46:49,960 --> 00:46:52,200
Speaker 2: I know, I know, I know, I you know. I'm

900
00:46:52,239 --> 00:46:58,000
Speaker 2: joking around. Boss. Well, okay, so you have been auditioning hard,

901
00:46:58,960 --> 00:47:01,440
Speaker 2: you've been learning scrips, you've been in school. What's been

902
00:47:01,480 --> 00:47:04,280
Speaker 2: the biggest kind of struggle this kind of trip lately?

903
00:47:05,520 --> 00:47:07,800
Speaker 1: So all of it. I don't have a manager. I

904
00:47:07,800 --> 00:47:11,400
Speaker 1: don't have a theatrical manager, which that's how your audition.

905
00:47:11,160 --> 00:47:15,360
Speaker 2: For You've got a commercial manager, yes.

906
00:47:15,200 --> 00:47:19,359
Speaker 1: But like they probably get me an audition once a month.

907
00:47:19,440 --> 00:47:22,000
Speaker 1: So everything else I have to self submit, which I

908
00:47:22,040 --> 00:47:26,799
Speaker 1: do do. Yeah. So it's just the hard thing is

909
00:47:28,520 --> 00:47:30,640
Speaker 1: and I think this is across the board, not just

910
00:47:30,680 --> 00:47:33,239
Speaker 1: in America. I think this is into any actor or

911
00:47:33,280 --> 00:47:36,719
Speaker 1: aspiring actor. Listening to this, it's so easy to be

912
00:47:36,760 --> 00:47:38,960
Speaker 1: in acting school, and like, I've been scammed on a

913
00:47:38,960 --> 00:47:43,000
Speaker 1: few acting schools, Like I even ordered an acting class

914
00:47:43,080 --> 00:47:46,200
Speaker 1: last week and I was like and escape leaving after

915
00:47:46,239 --> 00:47:47,840
Speaker 1: an hour. I was like, I'm out, Like this is

916
00:47:47,920 --> 00:47:53,920
Speaker 1: just a money making thing. And it's so easy to

917
00:47:54,000 --> 00:47:56,480
Speaker 1: be in training, right, and you can find really great

918
00:47:56,480 --> 00:47:59,480
Speaker 1: training all over the world Melbourne, Sydney, blah blah la.

919
00:47:59,600 --> 00:48:01,440
Speaker 1: Of course it's a melting pot. I can be in

920
00:48:01,520 --> 00:48:04,640
Speaker 1: training every day if I want to at a cost,

921
00:48:04,960 --> 00:48:07,400
Speaker 1: Like it's not cheap to be in acting school, but

922
00:48:07,600 --> 00:48:14,359
Speaker 1: to get from training to working and getting representation, these

923
00:48:14,400 --> 00:48:17,719
Speaker 1: are two massive hurdles that are very hard to get over.

924
00:48:18,640 --> 00:48:21,040
Speaker 1: And the struggle is that, like it's not about like

925
00:48:21,080 --> 00:48:23,879
Speaker 1: building your acting chops, Like, fuck me, I've been in

926
00:48:23,920 --> 00:48:29,480
Speaker 1: school consistently now since you and I met, really, and

927
00:48:29,520 --> 00:48:34,799
Speaker 1: it's like and that's like after having gone to university

928
00:48:34,960 --> 00:48:37,120
Speaker 1: and doing a Bachelor of Performing Arts as well when

929
00:48:37,120 --> 00:48:41,279
Speaker 1: I was younger. So the school and the training is

930
00:48:41,320 --> 00:48:43,440
Speaker 1: one thing, and then you do get these moments when

931
00:48:43,480 --> 00:48:46,520
Speaker 1: you're in training, going fuck, I feel good, I feel ready,

932
00:48:46,560 --> 00:48:49,040
Speaker 1: I feel like I could book something, Like I feel

933
00:48:49,040 --> 00:48:51,640
Speaker 1: like my chops are there, like I'm doing the work,

934
00:48:51,640 --> 00:48:54,040
Speaker 1: I've done the time, I'm ready to be hired, Like

935
00:48:54,040 --> 00:48:57,040
Speaker 1: come on, But that, especially when you're in LA, that

936
00:48:57,160 --> 00:49:00,680
Speaker 1: is you and thousands of other people are at that caliber.

937
00:49:01,600 --> 00:49:06,120
Speaker 1: And then yes, getting commercial agent is one thing, but

938
00:49:06,320 --> 00:49:09,080
Speaker 1: like getting a theatrical agent, someone to be putting you

939
00:49:09,120 --> 00:49:11,480
Speaker 1: forward for the shows on Netflix, with stuff on Hulu,

940
00:49:11,560 --> 00:49:14,960
Speaker 1: for stuff on even for like procedural dramas like Chicago

941
00:49:15,120 --> 00:49:18,080
Speaker 1: MD or Chicago Far all that, Like you cannot self

942
00:49:18,080 --> 00:49:20,600
Speaker 1: submit to that, it doesn't exist. You have to have

943
00:49:20,719 --> 00:49:23,720
Speaker 1: somebody that believes in you, that is putting you forward

944
00:49:23,760 --> 00:49:27,040
Speaker 1: now without a credit, which means an ad or some

945
00:49:27,120 --> 00:49:29,919
Speaker 1: kind of paid acting gig that has existed and gone

946
00:49:29,920 --> 00:49:31,640
Speaker 1: out into the world, like the way you were saying,

947
00:49:31,680 --> 00:49:36,000
Speaker 1: you're building your music credits. Without an acting credit, you

948
00:49:36,040 --> 00:49:40,560
Speaker 1: can't get representation, and without representation, you can't get the auditions.

949
00:49:40,640 --> 00:49:44,240
Speaker 1: And so it's this cycle where you're just like, holy fuck,

950
00:49:44,360 --> 00:49:46,440
Speaker 1: like how do I break through that? And I think

951
00:49:46,480 --> 00:49:49,279
Speaker 1: in LA it is relationships that break through that. But

952
00:49:50,960 --> 00:49:54,279
Speaker 1: it's such a slow burn, such a slow burn, and

953
00:49:54,320 --> 00:49:57,960
Speaker 1: even the relationship thing it's slow, It is so slow.

954
00:49:59,000 --> 00:50:00,840
Speaker 1: It's not like you meet some one over coffee and

955
00:50:00,920 --> 00:50:03,760
Speaker 1: next minute you've been cast in the next fucking Marvel.

956
00:50:03,920 --> 00:50:06,880
Speaker 1: It doesn't work like that. It's like it is you slowly,

957
00:50:06,920 --> 00:50:10,000
Speaker 1: slowly chip away for years and then you get called

958
00:50:10,040 --> 00:50:15,480
Speaker 1: on overnight success. It's just not It is not straight

959
00:50:16,120 --> 00:50:19,279
Speaker 1: for it's not easy and there is such a disconnect

960
00:50:19,280 --> 00:50:23,399
Speaker 1: from the training, the representation and booking work. The three

961
00:50:23,440 --> 00:50:26,200
Speaker 1: of them need to match up like they don't, and

962
00:50:26,239 --> 00:50:28,600
Speaker 1: I don't think they do for many people. I think

963
00:50:28,680 --> 00:50:31,520
Speaker 1: the way that people get through like the way, in

964
00:50:31,560 --> 00:50:34,440
Speaker 1: all honesty, the way I got this commercial agent was

965
00:50:34,480 --> 00:50:36,440
Speaker 1: my friend was repped by them and said, do you

966
00:50:36,480 --> 00:50:40,040
Speaker 1: want a meeting with my other Australian friend Lola, And

967
00:50:40,120 --> 00:50:41,759
Speaker 1: they were like, yeah, come in on Monday, and they

968
00:50:41,800 --> 00:50:44,360
Speaker 1: signed me on the spot. That's the only reason I

969
00:50:44,400 --> 00:50:47,720
Speaker 1: got representation. And that's just commercial reps. That's not even fancy,

970
00:50:47,800 --> 00:50:50,680
Speaker 1: like that is commercial representation, Like I literally did an

971
00:50:50,680 --> 00:50:54,000
Speaker 1: audition for Vagina Dioda the first week I signed with them.

972
00:50:54,160 --> 00:50:58,279
Speaker 1: Like it's nothing fancy, but you know, you need to

973
00:50:58,320 --> 00:51:01,320
Speaker 1: be here, you need to be like in and around

974
00:51:01,400 --> 00:51:06,480
Speaker 1: it. It's just like it's fucking hard and there's no some

975
00:51:06,680 --> 00:51:09,800
Speaker 1: days there is no light at the end of the tunnel,

976
00:51:10,120 --> 00:51:13,800
Speaker 1: you know, boss, So well that's the struggle.

977
00:51:14,440 --> 00:51:16,719
Speaker 2: It's a struggle and everyone's got to do it and

978
00:51:17,080 --> 00:51:19,960
Speaker 2: you will get your shot. And I really believe it.

979
00:51:20,400 --> 00:51:22,680
Speaker 1: And that's the thing that's actually really hard to hear

980
00:51:22,880 --> 00:51:25,600
Speaker 1: because like you're just saying that, which is really nice

981
00:51:25,640 --> 00:51:27,600
Speaker 1: and kind and sweet of you to say that, but

982
00:51:27,719 --> 00:51:29,560
Speaker 1: like so many people come here and don't get that

983
00:51:29,600 --> 00:51:32,000
Speaker 1: shot totally, Like that's why people leave.

984
00:51:32,120 --> 00:51:34,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, totally, the shot is.

985
00:51:34,080 --> 00:51:36,880
Speaker 1: Not there for like there are so many talented actors

986
00:51:36,880 --> 00:51:37,880
Speaker 1: that never make it.

987
00:51:38,040 --> 00:51:39,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, And it's not an even play. It's not an

988
00:51:39,760 --> 00:51:42,040
Speaker 2: even playing field. It's not just like if you do

989
00:51:42,080 --> 00:51:44,000
Speaker 2: the work, you'll get it. Like there needs to be

990
00:51:44,239 --> 00:51:48,960
Speaker 2: all these extra factors that exist, like networking, like the relationships,

991
00:51:48,960 --> 00:51:49,920
Speaker 2: like everything else.

992
00:51:49,680 --> 00:51:54,200
Speaker 1: You said, and like as much as relationships are important,

993
00:51:54,280 --> 00:51:57,960
Speaker 1: or you might meet somebody that has like got their

994
00:51:58,000 --> 00:52:00,880
Speaker 1: first amazing gig or something like that, like it is

995
00:52:01,200 --> 00:52:04,439
Speaker 1: rare that someone will really go out on a limb

996
00:52:04,440 --> 00:52:07,560
Speaker 1: for you, like really like go fuck this, I want

997
00:52:07,600 --> 00:52:10,160
Speaker 1: you to look after my or can you see my

998
00:52:10,320 --> 00:52:13,640
Speaker 1: friend or can you like that is and it's made

999
00:52:13,680 --> 00:52:16,719
Speaker 1: me realize like when I do make it and I

1000
00:52:16,760 --> 00:52:18,920
Speaker 1: can help other people, I want to find a way

1001
00:52:18,960 --> 00:52:21,400
Speaker 1: to help to the best of my capacity, because like this,

1002
00:52:21,719 --> 00:52:24,400
Speaker 1: like being in the you feel like you're in a

1003
00:52:24,480 --> 00:52:27,400
Speaker 1: washing machine. You're just kind of like fucking spinning around.

1004
00:52:27,760 --> 00:52:30,160
Speaker 1: But then as well, you do look back at the

1005
00:52:30,280 --> 00:52:32,399
Speaker 1: end of the year or months later and you're like, fuck,

1006
00:52:32,440 --> 00:52:34,600
Speaker 1: I actually did all this training. Actually I do have

1007
00:52:34,640 --> 00:52:37,160
Speaker 1: one rep this year, like you know, or I've had

1008
00:52:37,200 --> 00:52:39,680
Speaker 1: like this year, I've had like five more callbacks than

1009
00:52:39,719 --> 00:52:42,839
Speaker 1: I had last year. But you know, like you do slowly,

1010
00:52:42,960 --> 00:52:46,239
Speaker 1: slowly start to get results, but fuck it is few

1011
00:52:46,280 --> 00:52:48,719
Speaker 1: and far between. That is the truth of it.

1012
00:52:48,960 --> 00:52:52,200
Speaker 2: No, I see, I see your progression, and as I said,

1013
00:52:52,280 --> 00:52:55,000
Speaker 2: I still I believe in you and I know that

1014
00:52:55,080 --> 00:52:57,920
Speaker 2: you can do it, and you also have the resilience

1015
00:52:58,040 --> 00:53:00,160
Speaker 2: for that. Like I think that's the difference between you

1016
00:53:00,200 --> 00:53:04,240
Speaker 2: and other people is their actual resilience. So you should

1017
00:53:04,280 --> 00:53:05,800
Speaker 2: be very very proud of yourself.

1018
00:53:06,800 --> 00:53:10,279
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, Like I get I think resilience

1019
00:53:10,400 --> 00:53:14,720
Speaker 1: is definitely important for sure, and like not being lazy,

1020
00:53:14,880 --> 00:53:17,520
Speaker 1: like super disciplined, You've got to be really disciplined here

1021
00:53:17,600 --> 00:53:21,640
Speaker 1: and stay super ready even like at the yogurt stio.

1022
00:53:21,840 --> 00:53:24,719
Speaker 1: Like if a shift comes up, like you've got a

1023
00:53:24,719 --> 00:53:27,680
Speaker 1: pretty small window of time to take put your hand

1024
00:53:27,719 --> 00:53:29,640
Speaker 1: up to take that shift, otherwise five other people are

1025
00:53:29,640 --> 00:53:31,359
Speaker 1: going to beat you to it. And it's for like

1026
00:53:31,440 --> 00:53:34,439
Speaker 1: a minimum wage job, and it's just like people are

1027
00:53:35,040 --> 00:53:37,960
Speaker 1: so hungry here, yeah versus Australia, you know what I mean,

1028
00:53:38,000 --> 00:53:42,400
Speaker 1: Like it is like super work work work mentality.

1029
00:53:42,480 --> 00:53:44,960
Speaker 2: You know, yeah, I have heard that quite a lot

1030
00:53:45,000 --> 00:53:48,040
Speaker 2: in a lot of fields. Everyone's just even like talking

1031
00:53:48,040 --> 00:53:50,840
Speaker 2: to Adam, like you know America. Yeah, my friend in

1032
00:53:50,840 --> 00:53:53,359
Speaker 2: San Francie's like the hours that people do and the

1033
00:53:54,000 --> 00:53:57,759
Speaker 2: level of work and stuff is just beyond what they

1034
00:53:57,800 --> 00:53:58,640
Speaker 2: do in Australia.

1035
00:53:59,600 --> 00:54:05,520
Speaker 1: So yeah, my roomy here works really really hard, and

1036
00:54:05,680 --> 00:54:07,839
Speaker 1: I was telling her about Adam and how hard he

1037
00:54:07,880 --> 00:54:12,840
Speaker 1: works too, and it's like the American way. It's wild.

1038
00:54:13,000 --> 00:54:15,000
Speaker 1: And same with like if you get a callback from

1039
00:54:15,000 --> 00:54:17,400
Speaker 1: an audition, it's for the next day, You're expected to

1040
00:54:17,440 --> 00:54:19,920
Speaker 1: wipe your whole next day and get to that doorback

1041
00:54:20,239 --> 00:54:23,520
Speaker 1: be early, be off book, and it's like it's that

1042
00:54:23,719 --> 00:54:26,799
Speaker 1: expectation that you were just so ready to jump, but

1043
00:54:26,840 --> 00:54:28,880
Speaker 1: it is hard when you're also trying to make money

1044
00:54:28,920 --> 00:54:32,360
Speaker 1: and like live and do other things like you really

1045
00:54:32,400 --> 00:54:35,400
Speaker 1: need to find and you need to believe in yourself

1046
00:54:35,440 --> 00:54:37,880
Speaker 1: and have that barometer so you like, yes, I am

1047
00:54:37,920 --> 00:54:40,040
Speaker 1: going to do this one not big picture that doesn't

1048
00:54:40,080 --> 00:54:41,520
Speaker 1: make sense for me to do. Like you've got to

1049
00:54:41,560 --> 00:54:44,680
Speaker 1: have a really clear barometer of what's going to work for.

1050
00:54:44,600 --> 00:54:48,480
Speaker 2: You and think like so I think like ahead like

1051
00:54:48,600 --> 00:54:50,880
Speaker 2: so much like what are you doing today that is

1052
00:54:50,920 --> 00:54:52,319
Speaker 2: going to affect the future.

1053
00:54:54,840 --> 00:54:58,800
Speaker 1: Totally totally. And that's where I always even in yoga,

1054
00:54:58,920 --> 00:55:01,040
Speaker 1: like I'll always they will be like like set an intention.

1055
00:55:01,239 --> 00:55:03,960
Speaker 1: I'm just like stay clear. It's always my intention is

1056
00:55:03,960 --> 00:55:05,640
Speaker 1: like I just want clarity. I just want to feel

1057
00:55:05,680 --> 00:55:07,520
Speaker 1: clear so that I can say yes to the right

1058
00:55:07,560 --> 00:55:12,040
Speaker 1: thing and I can you know, I mean be ready

1059
00:55:12,040 --> 00:55:13,920
Speaker 1: to jump, but also be ready to jump at the

1060
00:55:14,000 --> 00:55:16,319
Speaker 1: right stuff because there's a lot of scammy, crappy shit

1061
00:55:16,400 --> 00:55:16,680
Speaker 1: as well.

1062
00:55:16,760 --> 00:55:19,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think that that. It's I think the thing

1063
00:55:20,000 --> 00:55:22,600
Speaker 2: that's got to be hard is that being ready for

1064
00:55:22,719 --> 00:55:24,520
Speaker 2: like the next day. It's like, yep, you got this,

1065
00:55:24,800 --> 00:55:27,440
Speaker 2: here's a script. You've got to learn it. We're shooting

1066
00:55:27,480 --> 00:55:29,759
Speaker 2: tomorrow or we're doing it tomorrow. Like that's got to

1067
00:55:29,800 --> 00:55:33,799
Speaker 2: be the hard, super fucking hard. Part like instead of

1068
00:55:33,880 --> 00:55:37,160
Speaker 2: like America for the month to like learn something, No,

1069
00:55:37,239 --> 00:55:40,080
Speaker 2: you've got like one night to learn it. Well.

1070
00:55:40,080 --> 00:55:42,840
Speaker 1: The good thing about America though, versus Australias. In Australia

1071
00:55:42,880 --> 00:55:45,880
Speaker 1: you'll get like five to ten days to learn, but

1072
00:55:45,920 --> 00:55:48,200
Speaker 1: you have to be off book. In America, they have

1073
00:55:48,239 --> 00:55:51,360
Speaker 1: a thing where they say sides in hand. So for example,

1074
00:55:51,400 --> 00:55:54,360
Speaker 1: I'm holding a script up to boss right now, so

1075
00:55:54,480 --> 00:55:56,759
Speaker 1: you're allowed to be like on your audition with your

1076
00:55:56,800 --> 00:55:59,120
Speaker 1: script literally highlighted. You're allowed to look down at the

1077
00:55:59,120 --> 00:56:01,120
Speaker 1: script you meant to down at it and then put

1078
00:56:01,160 --> 00:56:04,360
Speaker 1: it kind of like to the site, like not acknowledge it,

1079
00:56:04,400 --> 00:56:07,000
Speaker 1: and then delivered the lines. That's quite hard to do.

1080
00:56:07,520 --> 00:56:09,400
Speaker 1: So you don't need to be off book. But in

1081
00:56:09,440 --> 00:56:11,480
Speaker 1: Australia you need to be off book. But you generally

1082
00:56:11,480 --> 00:56:14,160
Speaker 1: in Australia have more time to be off book. In America,

1083
00:56:14,200 --> 00:56:16,839
Speaker 1: they're just like, now, bring your sides in and there's

1084
00:56:16,840 --> 00:56:21,319
Speaker 1: a like the union laws mean that if you're going

1085
00:56:21,360 --> 00:56:24,640
Speaker 1: for a commercial in America, they have to have the

1086
00:56:24,680 --> 00:56:27,680
Speaker 1: script written on big butcher's paper or a white boy

1087
00:56:28,000 --> 00:56:29,280
Speaker 1: in the room for you.

1088
00:56:29,400 --> 00:56:29,600
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1089
00:56:29,719 --> 00:56:31,319
Speaker 1: Yeah, I had no idea until I did my first

1090
00:56:31,320 --> 00:56:33,480
Speaker 1: callback that I was like, the script's fucking in there?

1091
00:56:33,480 --> 00:56:35,080
Speaker 1: What was I stressing about the whole time?

1092
00:56:35,200 --> 00:56:36,440
Speaker 2: Is that the one where there was like heaps of

1093
00:56:36,480 --> 00:56:37,080
Speaker 2: other Aussies.

1094
00:56:38,080 --> 00:56:41,399
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, cattle call for Australians in LA.

1095
00:56:42,120 --> 00:56:45,879
Speaker 2: Well you're the most aussy, I know. Yeah.

1096
00:56:46,560 --> 00:56:46,759
Speaker 1: Quite.

1097
00:56:47,960 --> 00:56:50,520
Speaker 2: Do you want to do the questions now? Because we've

1098
00:56:50,880 --> 00:56:54,640
Speaker 2: we've been we've been yapping on for all right.

1099
00:56:57,680 --> 00:56:59,439
Speaker 1: I think we've answered a few of them in the chat,

1100
00:56:59,520 --> 00:57:02,880
Speaker 1: So let's just you know, if we can give quickies

1101
00:57:02,920 --> 00:57:05,280
Speaker 1: if we need to. What do you miss most about

1102
00:57:05,320 --> 00:57:05,759
Speaker 1: each other?

1103
00:57:06,080 --> 00:57:09,480
Speaker 2: Okay, I already said that I love our mornings, and

1104
00:57:09,520 --> 00:57:11,439
Speaker 2: I love our sunsets.

1105
00:57:12,719 --> 00:57:16,160
Speaker 1: Mornings, and I love that you're always there as my

1106
00:57:17,240 --> 00:57:20,520
Speaker 1: sounding board even if I'm starting to ruminate. Although have

1107
00:57:20,600 --> 00:57:22,040
Speaker 1: you noticed I'm getting better at ruminating?

1108
00:57:22,120 --> 00:57:26,400
Speaker 2: You've massively like such a big difference with you. I'm

1109
00:57:26,400 --> 00:57:27,000
Speaker 2: gonna be honest.

1110
00:57:27,040 --> 00:57:32,240
Speaker 1: Therapy, therapy. What is the key to your relationship, keeping

1111
00:57:32,240 --> 00:57:34,760
Speaker 1: your relationship strong when you're away from each other?

1112
00:57:35,440 --> 00:57:36,680
Speaker 2: I think just communication.

1113
00:57:38,000 --> 00:57:43,760
Speaker 1: I'd take communication therapy, yeah, yeah, and FaceTime. Like you know,

1114
00:57:43,800 --> 00:57:45,960
Speaker 1: when I was staying with friends, I barely facetimed you.

1115
00:57:46,040 --> 00:57:49,360
Speaker 1: We just did audio. I think FaceTime makes it.

1116
00:57:50,440 --> 00:57:52,720
Speaker 2: I was getting annoying. I was like, why have you

1117
00:57:52,840 --> 00:57:53,920
Speaker 2: not facetimed me?

1118
00:57:55,040 --> 00:57:58,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't blame you. How does your body and

1119
00:57:58,400 --> 00:58:03,720
Speaker 1: mind feel after IV? Well, I think I've talked about

1120
00:58:03,760 --> 00:58:05,880
Speaker 1: it kind of triggered a bit of PCOS in me,

1121
00:58:05,960 --> 00:58:07,800
Speaker 1: which I think I think I told you boss, like,

1122
00:58:07,840 --> 00:58:09,640
Speaker 1: I do feel like it's still getting a bit triggered.

1123
00:58:10,160 --> 00:58:13,880
Speaker 1: But I know what to do now to look after myself.

1124
00:58:13,960 --> 00:58:16,080
Speaker 1: You're going to send me some of my supplements, aren't you.

1125
00:58:18,120 --> 00:58:20,240
Speaker 1: But yeah, so I think I know what. I'm doing

1126
00:58:20,280 --> 00:58:23,440
Speaker 1: a full anti inflammatory month for all of June, so

1127
00:58:23,480 --> 00:58:27,280
Speaker 1: I'm looking forward to that. But I do feel like

1128
00:58:27,320 --> 00:58:32,000
Speaker 1: I'm finding some homeostasis mentally. I feel very comfortable with

1129
00:58:32,040 --> 00:58:34,080
Speaker 1: our choices because we did the best that we could

1130
00:58:34,120 --> 00:58:37,160
Speaker 1: with the finances that we could. So I'm glad we

1131
00:58:37,200 --> 00:58:41,280
Speaker 1: did that round. I'm glad we've got two A grade embryos. Yes,

1132
00:58:41,320 --> 00:58:43,600
Speaker 1: the doctor wanted us to do more rounds, but we

1133
00:58:43,640 --> 00:58:46,120
Speaker 1: couldn't afford it, and we can't afford it, and it

1134
00:58:46,160 --> 00:58:50,919
Speaker 1: also really messed with me. So I trust that, Yeah,

1135
00:58:50,960 --> 00:58:53,000
Speaker 1: I trust that we've done the best that we can do.

1136
00:58:53,120 --> 00:58:55,120
Speaker 2: We did and you smashed it, so proud of you.

1137
00:58:56,080 --> 00:58:57,880
Speaker 1: How do you feel about it all? I'm good.

1138
00:58:58,040 --> 00:59:01,000
Speaker 2: Everything's good for me. I mean I had a very

1139
00:59:01,200 --> 00:59:03,800
Speaker 2: easier part of it. I was just more there for

1140
00:59:03,840 --> 00:59:04,520
Speaker 2: the support of you.

1141
00:59:05,920 --> 00:59:08,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, but I lean on you very heavily.

1142
00:59:08,280 --> 00:59:10,000
Speaker 2: That's all right. I'm glad we did it.

1143
00:59:11,720 --> 00:59:14,520
Speaker 1: How has the distance been treating you guys this time

1144
00:59:14,560 --> 00:59:16,080
Speaker 1: around versus the other times?

1145
00:59:17,400 --> 00:59:18,200
Speaker 2: Probably easier.

1146
00:59:19,840 --> 00:59:21,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, Well, we know that this is probably the last

1147
00:59:21,880 --> 00:59:23,600
Speaker 1: time we'll do a part because hopefully you're going to

1148
00:59:23,680 --> 00:59:26,720
Speaker 1: come with me next year. Yeah, so we know that

1149
00:59:26,800 --> 00:59:29,320
Speaker 1: this is literally the last time of me being a

1150
00:59:29,320 --> 00:59:32,600
Speaker 1: little nomad jumping around to different houses. We'll actually let

1151
00:59:32,640 --> 00:59:34,840
Speaker 1: get our own place and have a real plan.

1152
00:59:34,960 --> 00:59:36,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, totally cool.

1153
00:59:37,840 --> 00:59:40,600
Speaker 1: How long will you be in America?

1154
00:59:42,040 --> 00:59:46,080
Speaker 2: Well, is this your question? It's just depended on work

1155
00:59:46,240 --> 00:59:46,880
Speaker 2: and schedule.

1156
00:59:47,600 --> 00:59:49,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, so it's a me question, I think. But yeah,

1157
00:59:50,480 --> 00:59:52,440
Speaker 1: you know this about me, boss, I chase work, So

1158
00:59:52,520 --> 00:59:55,439
Speaker 1: it really depend on if I get a gig here,

1159
00:59:55,480 --> 00:59:57,840
Speaker 1: if I get a gig in Australia, I'll just chase

1160
00:59:57,880 --> 01:00:01,840
Speaker 1: the work and you know, like and to be really transparent,

1161
01:00:02,000 --> 01:00:05,200
Speaker 1: like also chase the finances because I want to be

1162
01:00:05,240 --> 01:00:09,240
Speaker 1: able to maintain our beautiful life in both parts of

1163
01:00:09,280 --> 01:00:12,200
Speaker 1: the world. So I literally am a workhouse and will

1164
01:00:12,240 --> 01:00:12,640
Speaker 1: chase the.

1165
01:00:12,600 --> 01:00:13,600
Speaker 2: Word, yeah you are.

1166
01:00:15,520 --> 01:00:18,400
Speaker 1: When either of you popping the question I want to

1167
01:00:18,440 --> 01:00:21,920
Speaker 1: see you guys get married ring emoji, ring emoji, ring emoji,

1168
01:00:22,000 --> 01:00:25,680
Speaker 1: ring emoji, laugh face, smiley face, heart.

1169
01:00:26,040 --> 01:00:29,280
Speaker 2: What our heart? Yeah?

1170
01:00:29,360 --> 01:00:30,200
Speaker 1: Do you think it was a far?

1171
01:00:30,360 --> 01:00:34,160
Speaker 2: I thought you said far. Yeah, Oh maybe maybe later

1172
01:00:34,240 --> 01:00:34,720
Speaker 2: on this scene.

1173
01:00:36,000 --> 01:00:38,720
Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, did you just say that into the pod?

1174
01:00:38,960 --> 01:00:43,080
Speaker 2: Maybe? I don't know. I think no specific timeline, but

1175
01:00:43,160 --> 01:00:46,840
Speaker 2: I think you know we're leading towards that, and I

1176
01:00:46,920 --> 01:00:51,240
Speaker 2: know that you and you would enjoy that, and I

1177
01:00:51,280 --> 01:00:55,200
Speaker 2: think that we've probably at that point.

1178
01:00:55,520 --> 01:00:57,080
Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, you're admitting at.

1179
01:00:57,000 --> 01:00:59,439
Speaker 2: All on there. Well we you know it' still got

1180
01:00:59,480 --> 01:01:02,520
Speaker 2: time about time, but yeah.

1181
01:01:02,440 --> 01:01:04,360
Speaker 1: Just be natch organic Kobo.

1182
01:01:04,480 --> 01:01:08,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, like you always say, I love a long engagement,

1183
01:01:08,200 --> 01:01:09,240
Speaker 2: blah blah blah blah.

1184
01:01:09,440 --> 01:01:13,280
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, that's true, that's true. The final question, which

1185
01:01:13,280 --> 01:01:15,400
Speaker 1: I think we've already kind of answered, is when do

1186
01:01:15,440 --> 01:01:17,240
Speaker 1: you get to squeeze each other in person again? And

1187
01:01:17,280 --> 01:01:20,880
Speaker 1: that again is just like following the work essentially, But

1188
01:01:20,960 --> 01:01:22,520
Speaker 1: we'll definitely do Crimbo together.

1189
01:01:22,720 --> 01:01:26,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, definitely I think before that, do you a.

1190
01:01:26,480 --> 01:01:30,800
Speaker 1: Little psychic than you? Thanks for doing the pod with me.

1191
01:01:31,080 --> 01:01:33,760
Speaker 2: That's all right. Hopefully wasn't too much about me.

1192
01:01:35,160 --> 01:01:37,280
Speaker 1: No, you asked about me too, it was nice.

1193
01:01:37,400 --> 01:01:39,400
Speaker 2: Okay, good, all right, Well, I love you. Thanks for

1194
01:01:39,440 --> 01:01:41,439
Speaker 2: having me on Love your Boot.

1195
01:01:41,720 --> 01:01:43,320
Speaker 1: What's the magic we say about the pod?

1196
01:01:45,520 --> 01:01:50,280
Speaker 2: I don't know. Subscribe okay with good Subscribe and like

1197
01:01:50,440 --> 01:01:53,920
Speaker 2: and leave a review and share it with your friends.

1198
01:01:54,520 --> 01:01:58,040
Speaker 1: And if you love Matt's beautiful doulcet tones, listen to

1199
01:01:58,080 --> 01:02:01,920
Speaker 1: his podcast called Paradise Problems you can listen to on

1200
01:02:02,080 --> 01:02:05,400
Speaker 1: all good podcasting streaming platforms.

1201
01:02:05,480 --> 01:02:09,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, thank you, love you, love you boo.

1202
01:02:09,600 --> 01:02:19,000
Speaker 1: Okay bye. That's a wrap on another episode of Fearlessly Failing.

1203
01:02:19,680 --> 01:02:23,160
Speaker 1: As always, thank you to our guests, and let's continue

1204
01:02:23,160 --> 01:02:29,000
Speaker 1: the conversation on Instagram. I'm at Yamo Lollaberry. This party

1205
01:02:29,520 --> 01:02:33,720
Speaker 1: my work for podcast is available on all streaming platforms.

1206
01:02:34,200 --> 01:02:37,200
Speaker 1: I'd love it if you could subscribe, rate and comment

1207
01:02:37,440 --> 01:02:39,320
Speaker 1: and of course spread the love