WEBVTT - The Only Child Myth

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<v Speaker 1>This podcast is for general information only and should not

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<v Speaker 1>be taken as psychological advice. Listeners should consult with their

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<v Speaker 1>healthcare professionals for specific medical advice.

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<v Speaker 2>Well. Hello, I'm Amanda Keller and I'm Anita McGregor, and

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<v Speaker 2>welcome to Double a Chattery.

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<v Speaker 1>Amanda, I need fashion advice.

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<v Speaker 2>Please, You've come to the right liceinate. I know I'm

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<v Speaker 2>wearing a moon move. Let me help you.

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<v Speaker 1>So I've seen all the cool kids now are doing

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<v Speaker 1>like their shirts are untucked at the front. And I

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<v Speaker 1>came in this morning to go and record this, and

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<v Speaker 1>I think I look like an imbecile.

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<v Speaker 2>Stand up like and I'll tell you whether you look

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<v Speaker 2>like an embole. So, Anita, you've got a linen shirt

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<v Speaker 2>and a nice skirt.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, a linen skirt too, And I'm falling off my chair.

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<v Speaker 2>You are ok, your legs hitting the ground. They are swinging,

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<v Speaker 2>free swinging. I think see, because you'll slim all around,

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<v Speaker 2>you don't need to do any of this. But though

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<v Speaker 2>you think you're talking about the French tuck, am I

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<v Speaker 2>the shortening of that as fuck, which is rude. The

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<v Speaker 2>French tuck and the reason it suits a lot of people,

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<v Speaker 2>and why I like the French tuck is because you

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<v Speaker 2>tuck in a tiny bit of your shirt and it

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<v Speaker 2>still covers the bulk of your stomach and your bum.

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<v Speaker 2>So that's what that is. Where you tuck a little

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<v Speaker 2>bit or you scrunch a bit at the side and

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<v Speaker 2>put that in and so it sort of sits nicely.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't feel comfortable doing the tuck in. I often

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<v Speaker 2>feel like I think I've got a high waist. My

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<v Speaker 2>mother always said to me that I was long in

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<v Speaker 2>the fork, and I have no idea what I think.

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<v Speaker 2>What that means is there's a lot of distance from

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<v Speaker 2>my navel to my fork. So if I wear pants,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, I can either have a camel toe or

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<v Speaker 2>stomach fat hanging over the top. I have to make

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<v Speaker 2>a choice. They're my only choices in life. I don't

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<v Speaker 2>know which to go for. I once went into a

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<v Speaker 2>jean shop and it was might've been just jeans or something,

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<v Speaker 2>and they said we can fit anybody type, and after

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<v Speaker 2>an hour he'd just given up. I just I just

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<v Speaker 2>go away, I just go away. I've never felt wearing pants.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know where to put myself with it, and

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<v Speaker 2>wearing skirts same, I don't know where to put myself

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<v Speaker 2>with it a slight tux. That's why I'm happier in winter.

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<v Speaker 2>I can wear a jacket and layer things up. In summer,

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<v Speaker 2>I don't feel comfortable always tucking things in because there's

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<v Speaker 2>a bit of a stomach or a bum self conscious

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<v Speaker 2>nature going on.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh for me, it's always like I just have to

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<v Speaker 1>hem stuff. That's that's always been like, no matter what

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<v Speaker 1>size I've been, it's always that the pouts are like

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<v Speaker 1>four feet too long.

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<v Speaker 2>And do you do your own hemming? Oh yeah, I'm

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<v Speaker 2>a sewing machine or by hand, both depending on what

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<v Speaker 2>the material is. Do you pin it yourself? I do?

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<v Speaker 2>How do you know you've pinned against other pants?

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<v Speaker 1>I do well? Either that or sometimes I'll even get

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<v Speaker 1>EMMT to go and pin it for me. Really, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I just need one.

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<v Speaker 2>Knights must fly by at your house. Women, I'm going

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<v Speaker 2>to put on some pants and you pin them.

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<v Speaker 1>You know the agendas of our evenings. Yeah, honey, guess

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<v Speaker 1>what we're doing next. I'm getting out some pin But

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<v Speaker 1>it's not what you see. You don't even know what

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<v Speaker 1>that means. Well, you look lovely, you're sorted now. I

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<v Speaker 1>am all sort of things French. Yes, I was going

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<v Speaker 1>to say, I'm all fucked.

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<v Speaker 2>French tucked, anita, French tucked. No abbreviations here, no abbrevas.

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<v Speaker 2>You don't have to be mad to work here. But

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<v Speaker 2>it helps, But it does help. All right, let's get started.

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<v Speaker 2>You know how, a little while ago I told you

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<v Speaker 2>about the myth that kayale is good for you. It

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<v Speaker 2>was just a marketing campaign. Kale had only ever been

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<v Speaker 2>used for garnish at Pizza Hut, really as a garnish

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<v Speaker 2>around the salad.

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<v Speaker 1>I was delighted to hear that amount it.

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<v Speaker 2>Kale isn't particularly good for you, and it doesn't break

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<v Speaker 2>down easily. Well, we know that when you try.

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<v Speaker 1>And eat it.

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<v Speaker 2>But it was a myth that it is a super food.

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<v Speaker 2>I have another myth, and it's not about a food. Okay,

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<v Speaker 2>the only child myth. You know how, we've always been

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<v Speaker 2>told that only children are inherently or if you only

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<v Speaker 2>had an only child, they'd be inherently selfish, difficult, lonely.

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<v Speaker 1>They don't share. Well, no, all that stuff. Remember that

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<v Speaker 1>I saw this.

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<v Speaker 2>I know you think I just listened to podcasts about

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<v Speaker 2>French tucking, but I saw this on a psychologist podcast.

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<v Speaker 3>So the idea that like only children are like selfish

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<v Speaker 3>and jealous and our argant and spoiled whatever it is,

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<v Speaker 3>actually came from a pr campaign to increase birth rates

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<v Speaker 3>after World War Two. Back then everyone wanted like a

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<v Speaker 3>very polite, nice child, and so the government thought, if

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<v Speaker 3>we tell people if they only have one child, this

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<v Speaker 3>child is going to be a spoilt brat, they'll have

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<v Speaker 3>more than one, they'll have siblings for their children. And

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<v Speaker 3>turns out it worked, but also the misconception has stuck.

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<v Speaker 2>So the whole idea of that was brought about so

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<v Speaker 2>people would have more than one child.

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<v Speaker 1>Wow, yeah, wow, and so and it's just not true.

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<v Speaker 1>They've done studies with you know, single kid households.

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<v Speaker 2>They're not more selfish, they're not more maladjusted, they're not

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<v Speaker 2>any of that stuff.

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<v Speaker 1>Wow, that's what a reassuring thing to hear. But it's

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<v Speaker 1>you know, if you're the only child in a household.

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<v Speaker 1>But wow, what a what a crazy I wonder what

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<v Speaker 1>crazy scientists thought that up.

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<v Speaker 2>Like you hear a story once and it sticks with

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<v Speaker 2>you in the same way, you can debunk the link

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<v Speaker 2>between vaccinations and autism a million times, but people will

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<v Speaker 2>still choose to believe that. So, yeah, that's how that goes.

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<v Speaker 1>Wow, that is I don't even know where to sit

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<v Speaker 1>with her, because that really has really been deep in

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<v Speaker 1>my Sachi, and it was actually I'd like to hear

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<v Speaker 1>your thoughts on it, but from me, it was definitely

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<v Speaker 1>part of our decision to have a second child.

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<v Speaker 2>How will you, Yeah, Well, we took us so long

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<v Speaker 2>to have Liam years of IVF that Actually we had

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<v Speaker 2>a much beloved nanny who had lost a child when

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<v Speaker 2>she was a teenager. When the child was a teenager

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<v Speaker 2>and she said if she didn't have other children, she'd

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<v Speaker 2>never got out of bed. And she was working with

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<v Speaker 2>us at the time when we were wondering whether to

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<v Speaker 2>have another baby or not. And I think she passed

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<v Speaker 2>away not so long ago actually, but she was a

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<v Speaker 2>big part of our lives and still is. We love

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<v Speaker 2>her very much. I sometimes think because of her, we

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<v Speaker 2>went on to have Jack and I thought, I don't

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<v Speaker 2>want to get to fifty and wonder if I should

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<v Speaker 2>have tried again. That seems like a million years ago,

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<v Speaker 2>saying into the age of fifty, But if ever, I

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<v Speaker 2>have to talk to people and they asking me about

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<v Speaker 2>whether they have more than one child. Every decision is

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<v Speaker 2>your own. But I know about my brother and I

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<v Speaker 2>is that you feel like we're the only people in

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<v Speaker 2>the world who know the wonderful craziness, the madness, the

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<v Speaker 2>strangeness of where you come from. You're like shooting off

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<v Speaker 2>into space, but on some level you're sharing a spacecraft

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<v Speaker 2>with somebody.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, they're the only person that probably knows all the

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<v Speaker 1>secrets that you haund when you were you know, in

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<v Speaker 1>the craziness of your parents and all those things. So, yeah, siblings,

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<v Speaker 1>I think you're an important part of it. That was,

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<v Speaker 1>as I said, I think it was a huge part

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<v Speaker 1>of the decision for us to make sure that Connor

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<v Speaker 1>had a sibling so.

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<v Speaker 2>He wasn't selfish. Well think they also say that that

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<v Speaker 2>China's one child policy was going to breed a whole

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<v Speaker 2>lot of small emperors. Yeah, of small, bossy, self important children.

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<v Speaker 2>I wonder how that's played out.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, they dismissed that policy a few years ago because

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<v Speaker 1>they are really struggling to go and have you know

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<v Speaker 1>that their population growth is limiting and that there aren't

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<v Speaker 1>you know, the people aren't getting married, they're not having

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<v Speaker 1>children early, they're doing all kinds of things, and whether

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<v Speaker 1>it's because of that one child policy or not. It's

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<v Speaker 1>hard to tell.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, it's interesting how parenting ideas come and go. I

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<v Speaker 2>saw this post recently. It was in a parenting magazine.

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<v Speaker 2>I think the title of this was Mum's adorable nineteen

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<v Speaker 2>ninety three baby picture is a modern pediatrician's worst nightmare.

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<v Speaker 2>So the first picture of her is her as a

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<v Speaker 2>baby in nineteen ninety three and her crib. She's got toys,

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<v Speaker 2>she's got crib bumpers, she's got a blanket and pillows,

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<v Speaker 2>versus her baby in a crib with no adornment, no

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<v Speaker 2>crib bumpers, no cutesy cutesy in there, nothing that the

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<v Speaker 2>baby can hold on to and presumably smother itself with.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, that's well, and I'm we So my youngest was

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<v Speaker 1>born in nineteen ninety two and my oldest in nineteen

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<v Speaker 1>ninety one, and so we just are absolutely in the

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<v Speaker 1>drop zone. That picture would have definitely of the nineteen

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<v Speaker 1>ninety three crib would have been definitely the same, and

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<v Speaker 1>the crib bumpers were just to go and prevent the

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<v Speaker 1>children from baking their hands and putting their arms through

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<v Speaker 1>the slots, putting their arms through and in fact, there

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<v Speaker 1>probably were still you know, lead based paint cribs around

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<v Speaker 1>at that time too. We know that was a big thing,

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<v Speaker 1>is to make sure that the paint on the cribs

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<v Speaker 1>and on the toys weren't lead based paint.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, so that was that was the modern parenting. It's

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<v Speaker 2>trying to have letting your kids mouth. But you now

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<v Speaker 2>have a young grandson. I guess he's sleeping more like

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<v Speaker 2>the baby on the right in this picture.

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<v Speaker 1>The absolutely Logan sleeps in a little sleeping bag without blankets,

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<v Speaker 1>your blankets. There's no crib bumpers. The crib itself. Like

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<v Speaker 1>the crib we had, the front came down and they

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<v Speaker 1>don't do that anymore currently. I'm sure it's some safety issue,

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<v Speaker 1>but no. The bed of the bottom of the crib

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<v Speaker 1>goes up and down if you need it to. It's

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<v Speaker 1>the baby gets taller. But no, there was like, it's

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<v Speaker 1>crazy how different raising our children is from how logan

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<v Speaker 1>especially you know certainly how he.

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<v Speaker 2>Sleeps, Which brings up the question of the latest research

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<v Speaker 2>for anything you think is the definitive research and will

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<v Speaker 2>always be so. And that's why I think the often

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<v Speaker 2>parents clash with their parents because rather than seeing this

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<v Speaker 2>woman here is just saying, isn't it interesting that they

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<v Speaker 2>dealt with the information they had at hand, and this

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<v Speaker 2>is the information I have at hand, rather than my

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<v Speaker 2>parents know nothing and they're so outdated they don't know anything.

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<v Speaker 2>It's being generous about well, they didn't know all of

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<v Speaker 2>this but did their best anyway. But also it's important

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<v Speaker 2>maybe for the older generation to say, well, there is

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<v Speaker 2>new research now and maybe I'll stay in the background.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm not saying, oh, things haven't changed that much, girly.

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<v Speaker 2>It's interesting, interesting, isn't it. But there's lots of other

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<v Speaker 2>parenting stuff at the moment that what's this thing about?

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<v Speaker 2>You let the baby dictate when it wants to go

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<v Speaker 2>into solids it can, and let it hold a friggin

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<v Speaker 2>chicken leg at the table.

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<v Speaker 1>Baby lad weaning is and I really struggled, Well, it's

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<v Speaker 1>the weaning, but then it's also baby lead feeding. It

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<v Speaker 1>moves on to and a lot of this is that

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<v Speaker 1>you just like the child basically will tell you when

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<v Speaker 1>they're hungry and what they want to eat and how

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<v Speaker 1>much solids they want. You know, everything when I was

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<v Speaker 1>a young parent was about choking hazards, and now that

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<v Speaker 1>doesn't seem to be really anymore. Really, Yeah, let them.

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<v Speaker 2>Have a big turkey leg.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, turkey leg, and yeah like Fred Flintstone, Yeah yeah,

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<v Speaker 4>and wow as we were cutting up grapes and tiny

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<v Speaker 4>bits of cheese, nothing big to go in your mouth

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<v Speaker 4>and spoon feeding it all.

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<v Speaker 1>Yep, nothing now like it's it's a very different world.

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<v Speaker 2>They're also saying in this article about how looking at

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<v Speaker 2>the things that modern parenting allows, all that insists, and

0:12:45.480 --> 0:12:47.640
<v Speaker 2>then you wonder what those things will be and used

0:12:47.640 --> 0:12:47.880
<v Speaker 2>to come.

0:12:48.240 --> 0:12:48.280
<v Speaker 4>Like.

0:12:48.360 --> 0:12:50.920
<v Speaker 2>For example, and I was a big proponent of this,

0:12:51.559 --> 0:12:53.400
<v Speaker 2>is letting the baby cry itself to sleep.

0:12:53.520 --> 0:12:53.720
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:12:54.080 --> 0:12:56.800
<v Speaker 2>I did that because I came back to breakfast radio

0:12:57.480 --> 0:13:00.640
<v Speaker 2>and I trained my children's sleep like that in the army.

0:13:01.280 --> 0:13:05.280
<v Speaker 2>And it was brilliant. It really was brilliant. I've got

0:13:05.320 --> 0:13:07.199
<v Speaker 2>friends whose babies slept with them till they were four

0:13:07.320 --> 0:13:10.000
<v Speaker 2>or five because they couldn't self comfort. And I know

0:13:10.160 --> 0:13:13.079
<v Speaker 2>those moments of doing it are heartbreaking and hard. But

0:13:13.200 --> 0:13:17.240
<v Speaker 2>my children show no psychological distress for having that little

0:13:17.320 --> 0:13:19.480
<v Speaker 2>tick that they both tell Oh they both still cry

0:13:19.520 --> 0:13:22.920
<v Speaker 2>every night, but other than that, and every time they

0:13:23.040 --> 0:13:25.760
<v Speaker 2>call me, I say, you know the rules ten minutes

0:13:25.800 --> 0:13:30.480
<v Speaker 2>of crying go. But it made I think if it

0:13:30.600 --> 0:13:33.679
<v Speaker 2>makes a household better, that's okay. And we had a

0:13:33.720 --> 0:13:35.880
<v Speaker 2>friend who once came over and he's in the medical profession,

0:13:36.679 --> 0:13:39.440
<v Speaker 2>and they came over from another country and they said

0:13:39.480 --> 0:13:43.760
<v Speaker 2>that they slightly doped up the baby with venergun or something.

0:13:43.800 --> 0:13:45.080
<v Speaker 2>You just have a bit of alcohol in it. Because

0:13:45.080 --> 0:13:47.880
<v Speaker 2>he said, everyone's calm, or when the baby's calm. And

0:13:48.000 --> 0:13:50.640
<v Speaker 2>he was a medical professional and he said, I'm not

0:13:50.720 --> 0:13:54.240
<v Speaker 2>doing the baby any harm, but this has comed mum, baby, me,

0:13:54.840 --> 0:13:58.280
<v Speaker 2>everybody down. Wow. Because when you look at those old remedies,

0:13:58.559 --> 0:14:00.599
<v Speaker 2>a lot of them were alcohol based. And that's what

0:14:00.720 --> 0:14:03.120
<v Speaker 2>the grandparents of today going, Oh, we used to put

0:14:03.200 --> 0:14:04.800
<v Speaker 2>scotch on the baby's gums.

0:14:04.559 --> 0:14:08.880
<v Speaker 1>Or give it a My sister was a tiny baby

0:14:09.360 --> 0:14:13.160
<v Speaker 1>and apparently the doctor told my mom to give her

0:14:13.280 --> 0:14:18.360
<v Speaker 1>a little bit of wine before meals, yes, to stimulate

0:14:18.480 --> 0:14:24.720
<v Speaker 1>her appetite. Really yeah, as a kid, as a baby,

0:14:25.040 --> 0:14:30.160
<v Speaker 1>like like you know, less than a year probably, really.

0:14:30.080 --> 0:14:33.160
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, because a lot of those early remedies were alcohol

0:14:33.320 --> 0:14:35.720
<v Speaker 2>like that. Fernergen. I don't know fernergan these days has

0:14:35.760 --> 0:14:37.680
<v Speaker 2>alcohol in it, but there was things. But you know,

0:14:37.760 --> 0:14:40.040
<v Speaker 2>as I said, rubbing scotch on the baby's gums. And

0:14:40.880 --> 0:14:43.200
<v Speaker 2>actually we asked you guys to get in touch with

0:14:43.320 --> 0:14:46.000
<v Speaker 2>us about some of the stuff that you remember through

0:14:46.080 --> 0:14:49.080
<v Speaker 2>the years. My mother, This is from Meryl. My mother

0:14:49.160 --> 0:14:51.720
<v Speaker 2>put brandy in my bottle with the milk if we

0:14:51.800 --> 0:14:53.080
<v Speaker 2>were being left for the babysitter.

0:14:54.800 --> 0:14:56.680
<v Speaker 1>Good for the babysitter. I mean, I want you to

0:14:56.760 --> 0:14:59.600
<v Speaker 1>do it for you though, really that's right. Why make

0:14:59.640 --> 0:15:00.600
<v Speaker 1>it harder yourself?

0:15:01.040 --> 0:15:01.320
<v Speaker 2>Wow?

0:15:01.560 --> 0:15:05.680
<v Speaker 1>And then this one was about like and having honey

0:15:05.800 --> 0:15:08.440
<v Speaker 1>on my dummy. This is from Lyndall Seymour, and she

0:15:08.560 --> 0:15:10.760
<v Speaker 1>was saying that was a big no when my babies

0:15:10.840 --> 0:15:13.400
<v Speaker 1>came along, and still is. But it's you know, even

0:15:13.440 --> 0:15:16.520
<v Speaker 1>the dummy now is kind of controversial whether you should

0:15:16.520 --> 0:15:20.200
<v Speaker 1>go and raise a child to self soothe with the dummy,

0:15:20.400 --> 0:15:21.119
<v Speaker 1>but dipping.

0:15:20.880 --> 0:15:23.760
<v Speaker 2>It in honey, all that sugar and all that stuff. Yeah,

0:15:24.200 --> 0:15:26.480
<v Speaker 2>it was kind of whatever got you through When everyone says,

0:15:26.520 --> 0:15:28.600
<v Speaker 2>well I've survived, but if you've got better ways of

0:15:28.680 --> 0:15:30.800
<v Speaker 2>doing it that don't make you a sugar added maybe

0:15:30.840 --> 0:15:31.320
<v Speaker 2>that's okay.

0:15:31.560 --> 0:15:33.200
<v Speaker 1>I think I would just would have wanted a lot

0:15:33.280 --> 0:15:36.880
<v Speaker 1>of for nergen. But yes, myself, Yeah, the one that

0:15:37.280 --> 0:15:39.600
<v Speaker 1>I was that really kind of hit me was the

0:15:40.040 --> 0:15:42.640
<v Speaker 1>one by Jenny Keynes, but she was saying, my dad

0:15:42.760 --> 0:15:46.320
<v Speaker 1>was big on table discipline, and it was it was,

0:15:46.600 --> 0:15:49.360
<v Speaker 1>you know, manners appreciation. Eating was in front of you.

0:15:49.720 --> 0:15:53.680
<v Speaker 1>All that we definitely when I was being raised, it

0:15:53.920 --> 0:15:57.960
<v Speaker 1>was lots of table discipline and it was eating what's

0:15:58.120 --> 0:16:01.400
<v Speaker 1>put in front of you. And I remember that my

0:16:01.600 --> 0:16:05.040
<v Speaker 1>mom used to make borsh, which is a beat soup,

0:16:05.800 --> 0:16:09.160
<v Speaker 1>and it would you hate beat truth. I hate beat

0:16:09.240 --> 0:16:14.080
<v Speaker 1>root because of this, and I hated borsh. It just

0:16:14.560 --> 0:16:16.200
<v Speaker 1>it would kind of it was one of those things

0:16:16.240 --> 0:16:18.160
<v Speaker 1>you'd put a spoonful in, it would go down, it

0:16:18.200 --> 0:16:20.120
<v Speaker 1>would come up, it would go down, it would come up.

0:16:20.040 --> 0:16:21.200
<v Speaker 2>And did you have to sit there?

0:16:21.280 --> 0:16:23.080
<v Speaker 1>I had to sit there and get through a ball

0:16:23.120 --> 0:16:25.240
<v Speaker 1>of borsh and before I could leave the table, and

0:16:25.480 --> 0:16:28.360
<v Speaker 1>I just it was the hardest. It was awful.

0:16:28.720 --> 0:16:32.680
<v Speaker 2>It was this power struggle what modern nutritionist, some imagining

0:16:32.760 --> 0:16:37.960
<v Speaker 2>would say, don't force your children to to finish everything

0:16:38.040 --> 0:16:41.240
<v Speaker 2>on their plate, because I, as you know, eat a

0:16:41.280 --> 0:16:43.040
<v Speaker 2>lot and ate really quickly. And I think it was

0:16:43.080 --> 0:16:45.040
<v Speaker 2>probably because I was brought up to eat everything on

0:16:45.120 --> 0:16:50.440
<v Speaker 2>the plate. And that's so those eating habits have completely changed,

0:16:50.480 --> 0:16:50.880
<v Speaker 2>haven't they.

0:16:51.120 --> 0:16:53.600
<v Speaker 1>Well, I don't know what the answer is. I was

0:16:54.520 --> 0:16:58.560
<v Speaker 1>talking to my niece about a year or so ago

0:16:58.600 --> 0:17:03.600
<v Speaker 1>because her son, who's a teenager, will just will eat

0:17:03.720 --> 0:17:08.800
<v Speaker 1>very very little and very particular foods, and she was

0:17:08.840 --> 0:17:11.600
<v Speaker 1>saying that the nutritias said, just let them eat what

0:17:11.680 --> 0:17:16.800
<v Speaker 1>he needs to eat. And I appreciate that sentiment. And

0:17:17.080 --> 0:17:19.679
<v Speaker 1>this is a growing kid, and you you know, as

0:17:19.720 --> 0:17:22.760
<v Speaker 1>a parent, it probably just tears your heart out to

0:17:22.920 --> 0:17:26.960
<v Speaker 1>go and say, you know, but this kid needs protein

0:17:27.119 --> 0:17:31.600
<v Speaker 1>and carbs and you know whatever else that the you know, vitamins, vegetables,

0:17:31.720 --> 0:17:34.280
<v Speaker 1>you know, things that'll make them grow and be strong

0:17:34.359 --> 0:17:37.920
<v Speaker 1>and healthy. And where does that come in? Because the

0:17:38.000 --> 0:17:40.439
<v Speaker 1>more you force, probably the worst it gets.

0:17:41.320 --> 0:17:43.399
<v Speaker 2>One of the things that was in this article about

0:17:43.440 --> 0:17:46.280
<v Speaker 2>things that we might look back on and think, what

0:17:46.400 --> 0:17:48.920
<v Speaker 2>were we thinking? They said here, I wouldn't be surprised

0:17:48.920 --> 0:17:51.919
<v Speaker 2>if pediatricians decide we can't be trusted to make our

0:17:51.960 --> 0:17:54.439
<v Speaker 2>own baby food at home anymore. That had been an

0:17:54.440 --> 0:17:57.760
<v Speaker 2>interesting one, because you can't trust that someone's feeding their

0:17:57.840 --> 0:18:01.520
<v Speaker 2>child properly by cooking for them, or that they're using

0:18:02.160 --> 0:18:06.920
<v Speaker 2>in date ingredients and what they're what they're using. Maybe

0:18:07.200 --> 0:18:09.840
<v Speaker 2>we'll go back to all the food should be pre

0:18:10.040 --> 0:18:12.520
<v Speaker 2>manufactured of an organic kind. Who knows.

0:18:13.080 --> 0:18:15.200
<v Speaker 1>I mean, as I'm thinking about it, I sound like

0:18:15.280 --> 0:18:18.920
<v Speaker 1>a troud waife because I actually so. Tell me I

0:18:19.160 --> 0:18:22.760
<v Speaker 1>sold my own the dapers for my children. No, I did.

0:18:22.960 --> 0:18:25.200
<v Speaker 1>Actually they were all out of flannel. They all have

0:18:25.320 --> 0:18:28.960
<v Speaker 1>the little the little velcrow on them. They were very sweet.

0:18:29.920 --> 0:18:32.920
<v Speaker 1>But I also made all the baby food for for

0:18:33.080 --> 0:18:34.640
<v Speaker 1>the for the kids. I did.

0:18:34.920 --> 0:18:37.200
<v Speaker 2>I was that parent, which is that because you felt

0:18:37.240 --> 0:18:40.000
<v Speaker 2>you had to, because I read somewhere that they did

0:18:40.200 --> 0:18:43.359
<v Speaker 2>an environmental side by side and the amount of water

0:18:44.600 --> 0:18:46.760
<v Speaker 2>and heating and all of that that it takes to

0:18:46.920 --> 0:18:51.439
<v Speaker 2>washerappy is the same as using a disposable that it doesn't.

0:18:51.520 --> 0:18:54.080
<v Speaker 2>You don't necessarily come out on top. Do it because

0:18:54.119 --> 0:18:56.560
<v Speaker 2>you want to, but don't do it for environmental purposes.

0:18:56.640 --> 0:18:56.840
<v Speaker 4>It was.

0:18:56.960 --> 0:19:00.040
<v Speaker 1>It was all for the environment. And you know, and

0:19:00.160 --> 0:19:03.000
<v Speaker 1>I mean I was raised like really really healthy, like

0:19:03.520 --> 0:19:09.720
<v Speaker 1>we you know, my parents had a you know why,

0:19:10.000 --> 0:19:12.840
<v Speaker 1>as I said, I used to be raised on eating moose.

0:19:13.680 --> 0:19:17.600
<v Speaker 1>But we'd you know, have not chocolate game, not chocolate moose,

0:19:17.640 --> 0:19:21.480
<v Speaker 1>but we would have all kinds of you know, vegetables preserved.

0:19:21.560 --> 0:19:25.080
<v Speaker 1>We had our own huge garden, and every year we

0:19:25.160 --> 0:19:27.639
<v Speaker 1>would preserve some of it. We'd had of it in

0:19:27.800 --> 0:19:29.440
<v Speaker 1>cold storage. It was all that kind of stuff. So

0:19:29.520 --> 0:19:32.800
<v Speaker 1>I was really really healthy. And I remember looking at

0:19:32.880 --> 0:19:35.920
<v Speaker 1>the little packages. They had little jars of baby food,

0:19:36.000 --> 0:19:38.920
<v Speaker 1>and and I just had a reaction to that. That

0:19:39.000 --> 0:19:42.720
<v Speaker 1>looks like processed food to me. So I made I

0:19:42.840 --> 0:19:43.640
<v Speaker 1>made baby food.

0:19:44.480 --> 0:19:44.680
<v Speaker 4>You know.

0:19:44.760 --> 0:19:46.960
<v Speaker 1>There wasn't a lot available then. So you do sound

0:19:47.000 --> 0:19:48.000
<v Speaker 1>up one of those treadwives.

0:19:48.119 --> 0:19:48.640
<v Speaker 2>I do, don't.

0:19:48.920 --> 0:19:50.480
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, did you dress.

0:19:50.280 --> 0:19:51.960
<v Speaker 2>Like you're a little house in the prairie? I did?

0:19:52.119 --> 0:19:59.760
<v Speaker 1>No, I didn't, but it was I was completely cool. Memories,

0:20:00.119 --> 0:20:03.359
<v Speaker 1>don't they ready to do? Yeah? You can see some

0:20:03.480 --> 0:20:05.600
<v Speaker 1>pictures of me when I was twenty five and oh

0:20:05.680 --> 0:20:09.120
<v Speaker 1>my lord. Yeah, but no, it was like I really

0:20:09.680 --> 0:20:13.080
<v Speaker 1>had kind of bought into a lot of the parenting

0:20:13.800 --> 0:20:17.440
<v Speaker 1>you know, myths that were probably well maybe not myths,

0:20:17.480 --> 0:20:18.840
<v Speaker 1>but certainly the trends.

0:20:18.960 --> 0:20:20.000
<v Speaker 2>And there were freshes.

0:20:20.119 --> 0:20:23.600
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and there was really I remember thinking there wasn't

0:20:23.720 --> 0:20:27.640
<v Speaker 1>many books. There was what to expect when You're expecting,

0:20:28.240 --> 0:20:30.040
<v Speaker 1>and then there was doctor Spark.

0:20:29.920 --> 0:20:31.960
<v Speaker 2>Who was the we didn't really have that through so

0:20:32.080 --> 0:20:32.480
<v Speaker 2>much here.

0:20:32.560 --> 0:20:33.760
<v Speaker 1>What did you did you have anything.

0:20:33.840 --> 0:20:36.600
<v Speaker 2>I know of doctor Spock only from watching American television.

0:20:37.760 --> 0:20:39.760
<v Speaker 2>I had a book called Baby Love by a woman

0:20:39.800 --> 0:20:44.320
<v Speaker 2>called Robin Gardner, and she was an early childhood nurse

0:20:44.480 --> 0:20:47.560
<v Speaker 2>I think at one of our local hospitals. But her

0:20:47.640 --> 0:20:52.359
<v Speaker 2>book I recommend it to any new mother. It covered everything,

0:20:52.440 --> 0:20:54.840
<v Speaker 2>was almost like an encyclopedia. But her main thing was

0:20:54.960 --> 0:20:57.399
<v Speaker 2>if you love your child and praise the achievements you're doing. Okay,

0:20:58.440 --> 0:21:00.760
<v Speaker 2>but yes, it was great. So isn't it funny? In

0:21:00.800 --> 0:21:03.119
<v Speaker 2>our society. On one hand, we have the pressure to

0:21:03.200 --> 0:21:06.280
<v Speaker 2>do all your things yourself, organic food and this and that.

0:21:06.680 --> 0:21:08.520
<v Speaker 2>On the other hand, we have a whole lot of

0:21:08.640 --> 0:21:11.240
<v Speaker 2>parents who are struggling to get by, and if the

0:21:11.320 --> 0:21:13.200
<v Speaker 2>kid has a cannic coat for dinner, that's what's happening

0:21:13.240 --> 0:21:18.000
<v Speaker 2>that night. A handful of hundreds and thousands. So somewhere

0:21:18.200 --> 0:21:19.760
<v Speaker 2>in the middle is most of us. I think.

0:21:20.160 --> 0:21:22.760
<v Speaker 1>I think so too. I think that that. And I

0:21:22.800 --> 0:21:26.720
<v Speaker 1>don't think anybody has a child going wow, look a

0:21:26.840 --> 0:21:29.240
<v Speaker 1>new baby and wonder how I can screw this one off. No,

0:21:29.359 --> 0:21:32.520
<v Speaker 1>you know, I think most people go in with that into.

0:21:32.440 --> 0:21:36.720
<v Speaker 2>Some mistake that I said that, and Jack has overcome

0:21:36.760 --> 0:21:37.080
<v Speaker 2>a lot.

0:21:37.440 --> 0:21:41.000
<v Speaker 1>He has that little therapy jar that you filled up

0:21:41.080 --> 0:21:45.000
<v Speaker 1>every night. But it's yeah, but I think that we do.

0:21:45.160 --> 0:21:48.680
<v Speaker 1>We go in with the best of intentions thinking, you know,

0:21:49.280 --> 0:21:51.359
<v Speaker 1>I'm doing the best I can. I think at the

0:21:51.520 --> 0:21:54.760
<v Speaker 1>end of the day, we all try our best, and

0:21:54.920 --> 0:21:58.000
<v Speaker 1>that really that hopefully we have more wins than losses.

0:21:58.040 --> 0:22:00.560
<v Speaker 1>That you know, and when you kind of think about

0:22:00.720 --> 0:22:04.320
<v Speaker 1>years of parenting, it's you know, we're we're doing okay.

0:22:04.440 --> 0:22:06.359
<v Speaker 2>We're doing okay, and you're allowed to put you make

0:22:06.400 --> 0:22:09.280
<v Speaker 2>yourself part of that equation too. There were some birthday

0:22:09.320 --> 0:22:11.480
<v Speaker 2>parties where I just said to the kids, look, not

0:22:11.640 --> 0:22:14.800
<v Speaker 2>this weekend. I cannot I can't stand around for another

0:22:14.840 --> 0:22:16.840
<v Speaker 2>four hours at a birthday party. I've got stuff I've

0:22:16.840 --> 0:22:18.960
<v Speaker 2>got to do at home. I'm sorry. Yeah, there was.

0:22:18.960 --> 0:22:22.000
<v Speaker 1>Always those competing demands between you know, a soccer game

0:22:22.119 --> 0:22:24.080
<v Speaker 1>and birthday parties.

0:22:23.680 --> 0:22:26.760
<v Speaker 2>And and you know my need to sit at home

0:22:26.760 --> 0:22:33.720
<v Speaker 2>and churn. Butter, I love it when you laugh at me.

0:22:37.520 --> 0:22:38.640
<v Speaker 2>Should we get to our glimmers.

0:22:38.720 --> 0:22:39.760
<v Speaker 1>Let's get to our glimmers.

0:22:50.880 --> 0:22:53.240
<v Speaker 2>Do you know of a small outberta town called Torrington.

0:22:54.359 --> 0:22:55.800
<v Speaker 1>Yes, it's near a drum heller.

0:22:56.080 --> 0:22:59.040
<v Speaker 2>Of course it is why didn't I start with that, Anita,

0:22:59.880 --> 0:23:05.280
<v Speaker 2>I have seen something that's from that small Alberta town,

0:23:06.000 --> 0:23:08.080
<v Speaker 2>and I'm shocked at A I've never spoken about it

0:23:08.160 --> 0:23:10.400
<v Speaker 2>every single minute of your life, and B that you've

0:23:10.440 --> 0:23:13.920
<v Speaker 2>never taken me there. It's an entire museum dedicated to

0:23:14.040 --> 0:23:17.440
<v Speaker 2>taxidermy gophers. Have you heard of it? I actually have

0:23:17.640 --> 0:23:20.959
<v Speaker 2>heard of it about Oh wow, it's everything I've ever

0:23:21.080 --> 0:23:24.960
<v Speaker 2>dreamt a museum would be. I'm looking at the pictures here.

0:23:25.040 --> 0:23:27.119
<v Speaker 2>Look at that, there's a little gopher. He's got a

0:23:27.160 --> 0:23:29.880
<v Speaker 2>fishing outfit on. Look at this one?

0:23:30.680 --> 0:23:31.760
<v Speaker 1>Is that the stage coach one?

0:23:31.920 --> 0:23:33.400
<v Speaker 2>Yes, he's driving a stage coach.

0:23:33.600 --> 0:23:38.840
<v Speaker 1>My husband's well, she's not really really wasn't their aunt,

0:23:39.000 --> 0:23:42.800
<v Speaker 1>but this and men she used to do taxidermied golfers

0:23:42.880 --> 0:23:47.119
<v Speaker 1>and I think she actually has the stage coach. I

0:23:47.200 --> 0:23:49.440
<v Speaker 1>think may have been hers. Wow, I'm gonna have to

0:23:49.520 --> 0:23:51.639
<v Speaker 1>check with them. What a claim to fame, I know,

0:23:51.880 --> 0:23:52.520
<v Speaker 1>it's amazing.

0:23:52.680 --> 0:23:54.359
<v Speaker 2>So there's one with a little hat on driving a

0:23:54.400 --> 0:24:02.640
<v Speaker 2>stage coach. There's one here dressed as a priest, blessing roadkill.

0:24:02.680 --> 0:24:05.600
<v Speaker 2>I'm imagining giving the last rates to its little buddies.

0:24:05.800 --> 0:24:09.600
<v Speaker 2>This one is a summer lady on a holiday. She's

0:24:09.600 --> 0:24:12.159
<v Speaker 2>got a swimming costume on, and she's stand next to

0:24:12.160 --> 0:24:12.800
<v Speaker 2>a barbecue.

0:24:13.200 --> 0:24:15.000
<v Speaker 1>That is charming.

0:24:15.640 --> 0:24:18.240
<v Speaker 2>I a long with this one because the outfit on

0:24:18.320 --> 0:24:22.280
<v Speaker 2>that that one is well sort of Elizabethan outfit it is.

0:24:23.560 --> 0:24:27.040
<v Speaker 2>This is a Shakespeare maybe a Shakespeare kind of thing,

0:24:27.119 --> 0:24:32.119
<v Speaker 2>or an early seventy year fellow. I know it's not

0:24:32.280 --> 0:24:35.040
<v Speaker 2>right to say it, but I love that stuff. Oh,

0:24:35.080 --> 0:24:38.359
<v Speaker 2>I love that quirky taxidermy. I assume the gophers have

0:24:38.480 --> 0:24:41.200
<v Speaker 2>all been have all died from passive smoking. There is

0:24:41.359 --> 0:24:43.680
<v Speaker 2>no nastiness in the way they met their maker.

0:24:44.160 --> 0:24:46.800
<v Speaker 1>I'm sure that there's not. Like it is a sure

0:24:46.920 --> 0:24:50.760
<v Speaker 1>sign of spring in Alberta when the gophers start running

0:24:50.800 --> 0:24:54.920
<v Speaker 1>across the roads so their roadkill. You probably can't help

0:24:55.000 --> 0:24:56.200
<v Speaker 1>but run over a couple.

0:24:56.680 --> 0:24:57.880
<v Speaker 2>Is it gopher a squirrel?

0:24:58.640 --> 0:25:02.720
<v Speaker 1>No, well it's a rodent, so it related. But a

0:25:02.800 --> 0:25:04.800
<v Speaker 1>squirrel lives up in a tree and a gopher lives

0:25:05.000 --> 0:25:08.879
<v Speaker 1>in little gopher holes.

0:25:09.119 --> 0:25:13.719
<v Speaker 2>It's like Punk's attorney Phil that we saw in Groundhog Day.

0:25:13.880 --> 0:25:18.320
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. So they well much tinier though, and they live

0:25:18.400 --> 0:25:23.000
<v Speaker 1>they tunnel under fields and stuff. So there was an

0:25:23.160 --> 0:25:25.880
<v Speaker 1>inventor a few years ago that came around like from

0:25:26.000 --> 0:25:30.520
<v Speaker 1>Torington area, probably not in Torrington, that had a big

0:25:31.440 --> 0:25:35.119
<v Speaker 1>vacuum truck and he would put the vacuum on the

0:25:35.400 --> 0:25:38.760
<v Speaker 1>little gopher holes stuck them all up. I don't know

0:25:38.800 --> 0:25:40.159
<v Speaker 1>what he did with them. I don't want to know,

0:25:40.440 --> 0:25:43.040
<v Speaker 1>but yeah, I think we're looking at a stagecoach driver.

0:25:44.080 --> 0:25:47.359
<v Speaker 2>I think so well, Anita, that is my glimmer that

0:25:47.480 --> 0:25:49.760
<v Speaker 2>such a place exists, and then it could be our

0:25:49.840 --> 0:25:50.720
<v Speaker 2>future travel plan.

0:25:50.840 --> 0:25:52.720
<v Speaker 1>It's a very very very good glimmer.

0:25:52.880 --> 0:25:53.480
<v Speaker 2>What have you got?

0:25:54.320 --> 0:26:01.120
<v Speaker 1>I am delighted that my part of going off camping,

0:26:01.440 --> 0:26:03.800
<v Speaker 1>and the best part of it is.

0:26:03.840 --> 0:26:04.960
<v Speaker 2>That where's any glimmering?

0:26:05.119 --> 0:26:08.040
<v Speaker 1>I know, I know you don't, but I get to

0:26:08.160 --> 0:26:12.159
<v Speaker 1>go with my grandson had been like my son and

0:26:12.280 --> 0:26:14.960
<v Speaker 1>daughter in law and my husband, and that they're organizing

0:26:15.040 --> 0:26:16.480
<v Speaker 1>it and I don't have to do anything.

0:26:16.720 --> 0:26:18.320
<v Speaker 2>It's just the best.

0:26:18.400 --> 0:26:20.240
<v Speaker 1>I don't have to do any meal planning. I don't

0:26:20.280 --> 0:26:21.720
<v Speaker 1>have to do anything.

0:26:21.800 --> 0:26:23.600
<v Speaker 2>Is that their gift to you? That is a huge

0:26:23.680 --> 0:26:26.160
<v Speaker 2>gift to me that you don't have to do any prep. Oh,

0:26:26.320 --> 0:26:28.159
<v Speaker 2>because that's why I think that's why I wouldn't like

0:26:28.240 --> 0:26:30.760
<v Speaker 2>camping because of the pa lava. I'm not good at

0:26:30.800 --> 0:26:31.240
<v Speaker 2>Pa Lava.

0:26:31.880 --> 0:26:34.639
<v Speaker 1>I know, like I still remember my mom would be

0:26:34.800 --> 0:26:39.160
<v Speaker 1>packing four kids, you know, into a small little station

0:26:39.359 --> 0:26:42.879
<v Speaker 1>wagon and that we would be you know, all the

0:26:42.960 --> 0:26:45.280
<v Speaker 1>kids would be going, can we go already? And my

0:26:45.480 --> 0:26:48.080
<v Speaker 1>mom was just you know, sweat on her brow as

0:26:48.160 --> 0:26:51.919
<v Speaker 1>she was packing up the station wagon.

0:26:52.200 --> 0:26:54.560
<v Speaker 2>It was just and the minute she got there she

0:26:54.600 --> 0:26:56.840
<v Speaker 2>would have had to plan what meals were happening. Yep,

0:26:57.520 --> 0:26:59.840
<v Speaker 2>I didn't make the beds, all that unpacking all that horrible.

0:27:00.040 --> 0:27:02.159
<v Speaker 1>It would be canvas tents and it would be it

0:27:02.200 --> 0:27:02.879
<v Speaker 1>would be awful.

0:27:03.040 --> 0:27:05.679
<v Speaker 2>So yeah, yeah, well, how's yours going to be any

0:27:05.720 --> 0:27:06.119
<v Speaker 2>different to that?

0:27:06.240 --> 0:27:09.639
<v Speaker 1>Well? No, I mean we have like ultra marble and tents.

0:27:09.760 --> 0:27:10.600
<v Speaker 2>It's still an intent.

0:27:10.840 --> 0:27:13.960
<v Speaker 1>I'm still not but it's yeah, but it's comfortable.

0:27:14.040 --> 0:27:14.399
<v Speaker 4>We do have.

0:27:14.640 --> 0:27:17.600
<v Speaker 1>It's comfortable and we get to be outside and it's

0:27:17.920 --> 0:27:18.640
<v Speaker 1>it's gorgeous.

0:27:18.680 --> 0:27:20.760
<v Speaker 2>I love it. Well, you and I can't be somewhere

0:27:20.760 --> 0:27:23.320
<v Speaker 2>all the time. No one of us has to be

0:27:23.400 --> 0:27:23.760
<v Speaker 2>a fool.

0:27:23.800 --> 0:27:26.640
<v Speaker 1>And luckily it was you, lucky meat.

0:27:28.080 --> 0:27:29.320
<v Speaker 2>Lots of love and see next time.

0:27:29.560 --> 0:27:36.359
<v Speaker 1>I love you. But mhm