1 00:00:00,040 --> 00:00:00,400 Speaker 1: Kick it off. 2 00:00:00,400 --> 00:00:01,040 Speaker 2: What do you got for me? 3 00:00:01,240 --> 00:00:03,280 Speaker 3: This is the last time that these people will hear 4 00:00:03,360 --> 00:00:04,840 Speaker 3: us this year for twenty twenty four. 5 00:00:04,960 --> 00:00:06,680 Speaker 1: Yeah, wow, what a year. 6 00:00:06,720 --> 00:00:09,480 Speaker 2: It's been been a long year. No, it's gone quick, 7 00:00:09,880 --> 00:00:11,119 Speaker 2: is it? I think so? 8 00:00:11,320 --> 00:00:12,600 Speaker 1: Well a bit of it. 9 00:00:12,640 --> 00:00:13,640 Speaker 2: Has it been a long year for you? 10 00:00:13,800 --> 00:00:14,120 Speaker 1: Yeah? 11 00:00:14,160 --> 00:00:15,080 Speaker 2: How are you feeling? 12 00:00:15,360 --> 00:00:16,720 Speaker 1: How are you? How do I sound? 13 00:00:17,480 --> 00:00:19,600 Speaker 4: Look you are a little bit under the weather. We 14 00:00:19,680 --> 00:00:22,639 Speaker 4: had to record these episodes. We're not obviously we're not live. 15 00:00:22,720 --> 00:00:24,720 Speaker 4: Podcasts aren't live. I hate to ruin it for anyone. 16 00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:25,160 Speaker 1: What. 17 00:00:25,480 --> 00:00:30,320 Speaker 4: Yeah, I've had to drag ash to my house. Unwell, 18 00:00:30,480 --> 00:00:34,879 Speaker 4: he's on a lot of drugs, all legal, A couple of. 19 00:00:34,880 --> 00:00:36,360 Speaker 1: Pain killers, couple of painkillers. 20 00:00:36,400 --> 00:00:38,440 Speaker 2: And we're just having a really nostalgic day. 21 00:00:38,800 --> 00:00:40,839 Speaker 1: I'm a soldier, you're a soldier, a young soldier. 22 00:00:40,880 --> 00:00:43,120 Speaker 4: We're just talking about what a year it's been. What 23 00:00:43,240 --> 00:00:46,520 Speaker 4: amazing guests that we've had on this podcast. And we thought, 24 00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:49,720 Speaker 4: we thought we'll give you a little reminder just how 25 00:00:49,720 --> 00:00:51,839 Speaker 4: good it was. I know I sound arrogant, so just 26 00:00:51,880 --> 00:00:52,400 Speaker 4: bear with me. 27 00:00:52,440 --> 00:00:55,600 Speaker 1: He sounds great. Shut up do I gosh, my good, 28 00:00:55,600 --> 00:00:58,840 Speaker 1: you's sound great, But also shut up. We did we 29 00:00:58,880 --> 00:01:01,000 Speaker 1: had some really good guesses. Both of our wives. 30 00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:02,000 Speaker 2: Oh look is arrogant? 31 00:01:02,080 --> 00:01:04,280 Speaker 1: Now, we had both of our wives. 32 00:01:05,760 --> 00:01:06,520 Speaker 2: She's nass. 33 00:01:06,560 --> 00:01:07,120 Speaker 5: April was. 34 00:01:08,360 --> 00:01:10,200 Speaker 1: Abril had a bit of Alian before she started. 35 00:01:10,280 --> 00:01:10,960 Speaker 2: Did she really? 36 00:01:11,040 --> 00:01:15,160 Speaker 4: Yeah, so I shouldn't laugh at her drug problems. 37 00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:18,000 Speaker 1: She was very anxious, very anxious, my wife. 38 00:01:18,080 --> 00:01:20,679 Speaker 6: But we had Laura Burn, also very anxious. She was 39 00:01:20,720 --> 00:01:23,280 Speaker 6: on more than ones this year. April's on more than 40 00:01:23,280 --> 00:01:25,039 Speaker 6: one too. We had a few episodes with April, so 41 00:01:25,160 --> 00:01:26,320 Speaker 6: we are happy. 42 00:01:26,160 --> 00:01:28,800 Speaker 1: Today to bring you Laura Burn, April Wicks. 43 00:01:28,880 --> 00:01:31,679 Speaker 4: Yeah, we led in the mix and Kayla George one 44 00:01:31,680 --> 00:01:32,600 Speaker 4: of our favorite episodes. 45 00:01:32,640 --> 00:01:34,280 Speaker 1: Taylor George would be up there with one of my 46 00:01:34,280 --> 00:01:36,000 Speaker 1: favorite episodes. I'd say, yeah you. 47 00:01:36,760 --> 00:01:38,720 Speaker 4: I didn't realize when we first met. I had no 48 00:01:38,760 --> 00:01:40,880 Speaker 4: idea how much of a basketball fan you are. 49 00:01:41,200 --> 00:01:43,440 Speaker 3: Yeah, look, I love a good time and I think 50 00:01:43,480 --> 00:01:44,839 Speaker 3: basketball is all a good time. 51 00:01:45,160 --> 00:01:46,119 Speaker 1: You have a party. 52 00:01:47,080 --> 00:01:49,600 Speaker 4: It's a big part and also one of my favorite 53 00:01:49,680 --> 00:01:52,320 Speaker 4: chats with a dad breath and Asta is also in 54 00:01:52,360 --> 00:01:53,760 Speaker 4: the mix. So it's a cracking episode. 55 00:01:54,120 --> 00:01:54,520 Speaker 2: Enjoy. 56 00:01:54,840 --> 00:01:55,640 Speaker 1: Let's get into. 57 00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:11,200 Speaker 7: Well. 58 00:02:11,280 --> 00:02:13,280 Speaker 3: I've asked it a few times in the podcast. We've 59 00:02:13,280 --> 00:02:14,840 Speaker 3: spoken about it a couple of times. 60 00:02:15,240 --> 00:02:18,320 Speaker 1: I've had a sectomy. Matt hasn't endured that as yet. 61 00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:21,920 Speaker 3: I want to know, is there a possibility for a 62 00:02:21,960 --> 00:02:24,400 Speaker 3: third child, A third Johnson? 63 00:02:24,560 --> 00:02:28,000 Speaker 8: A third Johnson that's not a cat? Do you want 64 00:02:28,040 --> 00:02:29,119 Speaker 8: to have another kid? 65 00:02:29,280 --> 00:02:30,519 Speaker 2: I think so? 66 00:02:30,520 --> 00:02:33,720 Speaker 8: So this is this is why the pendulum has swung 67 00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:36,800 Speaker 8: so wide. I watched it and I can't keep up 68 00:02:36,800 --> 00:02:39,079 Speaker 8: with him because only a couple of months ago, Matt 69 00:02:39,160 --> 00:02:41,440 Speaker 8: said he did not want to have another child. 70 00:02:41,240 --> 00:02:44,360 Speaker 4: At all, because you're advocating for it. You pulled me 71 00:02:44,400 --> 00:02:45,880 Speaker 4: aside and said we're having a. 72 00:02:45,760 --> 00:02:47,280 Speaker 2: Third personally for me. 73 00:02:47,560 --> 00:02:49,600 Speaker 1: I don't want another one for you. 74 00:02:52,600 --> 00:02:55,200 Speaker 7: There is enough plans and cats and everything. 75 00:02:55,639 --> 00:02:58,840 Speaker 1: I'm going to be honest, I don't need it. Why 76 00:02:58,960 --> 00:03:00,520 Speaker 1: I don't need you guys have anymore? 77 00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:02,880 Speaker 9: Is it the stress of what I would requires? 78 00:03:03,040 --> 00:03:03,440 Speaker 4: Already? 79 00:03:03,480 --> 00:03:04,600 Speaker 1: I'm stressed out, man. 80 00:03:04,720 --> 00:03:06,680 Speaker 6: The plants are staring at me, the cat's staring at me, 81 00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:08,840 Speaker 6: a three legged dogs staring at me, and now you 82 00:03:08,840 --> 00:03:11,000 Speaker 6: want to introduce a fucking baby to stare at me 83 00:03:11,200 --> 00:03:11,639 Speaker 6: on here too? 84 00:03:11,760 --> 00:03:14,760 Speaker 8: Okay? So I always thought it's funny for me because 85 00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:16,960 Speaker 8: I never really ever saw myself as being a mom 86 00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:21,200 Speaker 8: like I didn't. I never had you. I never had 87 00:03:21,200 --> 00:03:25,280 Speaker 8: the maternal pool. I never ever dreamt about being mom 88 00:03:25,639 --> 00:03:27,840 Speaker 8: or I didn't even know if i'd be a good mom. Really, 89 00:03:27,919 --> 00:03:30,000 Speaker 8: I was like, that seems like you require a lot 90 00:03:30,040 --> 00:03:32,520 Speaker 8: of patience to do it. And then I had Marley, 91 00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:35,480 Speaker 8: and I well know that I met Matt, and you 92 00:03:35,680 --> 00:03:37,119 Speaker 8: really wanted to be a dad. 93 00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:37,320 Speaker 5: And so. 94 00:03:38,760 --> 00:03:39,680 Speaker 9: You really wanted to be a dad. 95 00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:41,360 Speaker 8: And I think it was your excitement about wanting to 96 00:03:41,400 --> 00:03:44,320 Speaker 8: be a dad that made me have excitement about wanting 97 00:03:44,360 --> 00:03:46,560 Speaker 8: to be a mom. Even though I kind of knew 98 00:03:46,600 --> 00:03:48,720 Speaker 8: it would be my plans. I just didn't have this 99 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:53,320 Speaker 8: like big maternal pool. Then Molly came around, and I 100 00:03:53,360 --> 00:03:55,720 Speaker 8: loved it so much more than I ever thought I would. 101 00:03:55,760 --> 00:03:57,560 Speaker 8: And I think people are so quick to tell you 102 00:03:57,600 --> 00:04:00,680 Speaker 8: all the bad bits about parenting, and people don't really 103 00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:02,360 Speaker 8: stop and tell you the incredible bits. 104 00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:04,280 Speaker 1: It's just so much more fun to talk about. 105 00:04:04,320 --> 00:04:07,000 Speaker 8: That's what totally and people. We revel in complaining, right, Like, 106 00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:10,360 Speaker 8: that's my favorite thing. Humans love to complain. There's this 107 00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:14,080 Speaker 8: real like shared almost like like like shared camaraderie when 108 00:04:14,080 --> 00:04:15,240 Speaker 8: we complain about stuff. 109 00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:19,960 Speaker 2: All we do on this podcast. 110 00:04:18,120 --> 00:04:20,240 Speaker 1: And we're complaining about how the meads uncooked. 111 00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:23,960 Speaker 4: But I will say you're also a great mum as well. 112 00:04:24,240 --> 00:04:24,719 Speaker 9: Thank you. 113 00:04:24,920 --> 00:04:25,840 Speaker 5: I love being a mom. 114 00:04:25,880 --> 00:04:28,400 Speaker 1: I do, I do want. 115 00:04:29,640 --> 00:04:30,120 Speaker 9: I love it. 116 00:04:30,160 --> 00:04:31,680 Speaker 8: I love it so much more than I ever thought 117 00:04:31,720 --> 00:04:35,080 Speaker 8: I would. And I look at Lola now, and you know, obviously, 118 00:04:35,960 --> 00:04:37,680 Speaker 8: whether we have two, we have three, I'm still a 119 00:04:37,760 --> 00:04:39,839 Speaker 8: mom for as long as I am on the earth. 120 00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:42,960 Speaker 8: But my thing is I look at Lola and I 121 00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:45,559 Speaker 8: can't believe that I'm never going to have another little 122 00:04:45,680 --> 00:04:48,200 Speaker 8: person like that. She's the youngest that there is ever 123 00:04:48,240 --> 00:04:50,520 Speaker 8: going to be in this household. And but every so 124 00:04:50,640 --> 00:04:52,440 Speaker 8: often I just have these moments where I'm like, surely 125 00:04:52,480 --> 00:04:54,120 Speaker 8: this can't be it. And I always thought I would 126 00:04:54,120 --> 00:04:56,080 Speaker 8: get to a point of completeness. I thought I would 127 00:04:56,200 --> 00:04:58,280 Speaker 8: wake up one day and be like after Lola was born. 128 00:04:58,279 --> 00:05:00,080 Speaker 8: I thought I would have this moment where I'd be like, oh, 129 00:05:00,080 --> 00:05:02,160 Speaker 8: I'm so done, like tie the tube. 130 00:05:02,200 --> 00:05:03,360 Speaker 1: So it's a possibility. 131 00:05:04,200 --> 00:05:06,680 Speaker 8: I would like to I'm thirty eight now, I'll be 132 00:05:06,720 --> 00:05:10,320 Speaker 8: thirty nine next year. Work is a lot in terms 133 00:05:10,360 --> 00:05:13,520 Speaker 8: of like contracts and trying to figure out timings and stuff. 134 00:05:13,800 --> 00:05:17,080 Speaker 8: But if we could have a baby next year, I 135 00:05:17,120 --> 00:05:18,680 Speaker 8: would be excited too. 136 00:05:18,839 --> 00:05:19,839 Speaker 1: Would you name it after me. 137 00:05:20,120 --> 00:05:21,279 Speaker 9: It would be named. 138 00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:27,200 Speaker 8: Ash jam Picklets like. 139 00:05:27,320 --> 00:05:29,880 Speaker 9: I know Jamie Little Jimmy Jam. 140 00:05:30,160 --> 00:05:32,440 Speaker 1: I'm definitely done obviously. How that a sex me? 141 00:05:33,520 --> 00:05:35,920 Speaker 8: Yeah, okay, well I know that you like you feel 142 00:05:36,040 --> 00:05:37,840 Speaker 8: the churl in there, but ok. My one thing though 143 00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:40,600 Speaker 8: about like having another kid is that I think people's 144 00:05:40,640 --> 00:05:43,680 Speaker 8: instant reaction when someone has already has two these days 145 00:05:43,720 --> 00:05:46,200 Speaker 8: and that's two of the same sex, the instant thought 146 00:05:46,240 --> 00:05:47,880 Speaker 8: is to be like, oh, well, you're trying for a boy, 147 00:05:48,080 --> 00:05:50,960 Speaker 8: like you're trying for the alternate sex. I love being 148 00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:53,920 Speaker 8: a mum to girls. I always saw myself if I 149 00:05:53,960 --> 00:05:55,960 Speaker 8: was going to have kids as having boys, so like 150 00:05:56,080 --> 00:05:58,800 Speaker 8: it's my parenting thoughts of what I thought it was 151 00:05:58,839 --> 00:06:00,000 Speaker 8: going to be is completely out the way. 152 00:06:00,279 --> 00:06:01,560 Speaker 2: I'd always prefer another girl. 153 00:06:01,640 --> 00:06:03,440 Speaker 8: Yeah, and if we had three girls, I would be 154 00:06:03,839 --> 00:06:07,000 Speaker 8: absolutely fucking thrilled. So I want that to be like 155 00:06:07,080 --> 00:06:09,320 Speaker 8: on record, so that if we ever do have another girl, 156 00:06:09,360 --> 00:06:11,440 Speaker 8: people are like, oh my god, yeah, I just wanted 157 00:06:11,440 --> 00:06:14,920 Speaker 8: to have my boy, just wanted genuinely, Yeah, I could 158 00:06:14,960 --> 00:06:17,240 Speaker 8: see us having another kid. Also, Nana just moved in, 159 00:06:17,320 --> 00:06:18,600 Speaker 8: so like we've got a free baby sitter. 160 00:06:18,760 --> 00:06:20,240 Speaker 1: I would like to be more involved. 161 00:06:21,839 --> 00:06:22,719 Speaker 7: You could be the Godfather. 162 00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:24,880 Speaker 1: Thank you. 163 00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:28,120 Speaker 5: I laugh about it now. 164 00:06:28,160 --> 00:06:30,840 Speaker 10: But the thing I think that I was attracted to 165 00:06:30,920 --> 00:06:34,800 Speaker 10: you were like your whole two tattoos that you had 166 00:06:34,800 --> 00:06:37,640 Speaker 10: at the time, and I was. 167 00:06:37,600 --> 00:06:41,240 Speaker 3: Like, that's hot, and they're like the worst tattoos I have, yeah, 168 00:06:42,520 --> 00:06:45,320 Speaker 3: under my arm and under that they're like one of 169 00:06:45,360 --> 00:06:47,800 Speaker 3: them was done by a tato artist that she was 170 00:06:47,880 --> 00:06:51,080 Speaker 3: pissed and it was like, so it's so bad, and 171 00:06:51,120 --> 00:06:53,040 Speaker 3: the other one was just like a dumb seventeen year 172 00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:53,680 Speaker 3: old tatoo. 173 00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:55,480 Speaker 2: Did you show where the tattoos that night? 174 00:06:55,560 --> 00:06:56,640 Speaker 1: Yeah? I just walked around those. 175 00:06:57,320 --> 00:06:59,640 Speaker 10: By the way, he was skinnier than me as well, 176 00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:01,320 Speaker 10: it was I was so small. 177 00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:03,920 Speaker 4: The photos of you when you were younger, you're a 178 00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:06,119 Speaker 4: bit of a trim young lad. 179 00:07:06,279 --> 00:07:08,400 Speaker 1: Oh now what am I fat? 180 00:07:08,480 --> 00:07:08,720 Speaker 3: Dad? 181 00:07:08,880 --> 00:07:09,760 Speaker 2: A very clean cut. 182 00:07:09,760 --> 00:07:11,760 Speaker 1: You're allowed ten kilos for every kid you have. 183 00:07:12,240 --> 00:07:13,320 Speaker 2: You didn't have the mustache. 184 00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:18,000 Speaker 4: No, did that version of events match what happened from you? 185 00:07:18,080 --> 00:07:20,640 Speaker 3: Yes? Yeah, that was pretty bang on. I think I 186 00:07:20,720 --> 00:07:24,280 Speaker 3: tried really hard to go home with her. She said, no, 187 00:07:25,040 --> 00:07:26,280 Speaker 3: kick me off the bus. 188 00:07:26,560 --> 00:07:28,600 Speaker 9: Yeah, we did catch a bus home, got a bus home. 189 00:07:28,720 --> 00:07:34,320 Speaker 3: Well, young I was poor and then I spent weeks 190 00:07:34,760 --> 00:07:38,520 Speaker 3: weeks courting, courting weeks to the point where it was 191 00:07:38,840 --> 00:07:41,160 Speaker 3: a joke between her and her friends. So I was 192 00:07:41,200 --> 00:07:42,600 Speaker 3: a joke really. 193 00:07:42,480 --> 00:07:44,320 Speaker 2: Because you were you were like playing hard. 194 00:07:44,080 --> 00:07:46,320 Speaker 9: To get or he was very keen. 195 00:07:46,560 --> 00:07:51,120 Speaker 10: And I remember joking like because he sent like, not millions, 196 00:07:53,480 --> 00:07:55,240 Speaker 10: but he said plenty. 197 00:07:54,840 --> 00:07:56,160 Speaker 5: Of messages throughout the day. 198 00:07:56,200 --> 00:07:57,880 Speaker 10: And at that time I had a job where my 199 00:07:57,920 --> 00:08:00,520 Speaker 10: phone was locked away on a locker and you'd send 200 00:08:00,680 --> 00:08:03,080 Speaker 10: like a couple of messages like just like, how's your day, 201 00:08:03,160 --> 00:08:04,520 Speaker 10: but then another one would come through. 202 00:08:04,360 --> 00:08:07,480 Speaker 2: The one You're going back to back to back. 203 00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:09,680 Speaker 9: Back to back to back in those days. 204 00:08:09,760 --> 00:08:11,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, I'd never do that now. 205 00:08:11,240 --> 00:08:13,160 Speaker 10: And I joke to one of my friends at the 206 00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:15,160 Speaker 10: time and I was like, oh my god, this guy's 207 00:08:15,200 --> 00:08:15,600 Speaker 10: so keen. 208 00:08:15,720 --> 00:08:17,400 Speaker 5: Imagine if I end up marrying him. 209 00:08:19,880 --> 00:08:22,880 Speaker 1: There you go, guys persistence. 210 00:08:23,120 --> 00:08:25,640 Speaker 4: Do you remember after you guys met at the pub, 211 00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:27,240 Speaker 4: like what your first date was? 212 00:08:28,600 --> 00:08:32,920 Speaker 2: Yes, where did you go? 213 00:08:33,240 --> 00:08:37,200 Speaker 10: So you'd been out like that whole day, so I 214 00:08:37,240 --> 00:08:39,920 Speaker 10: think you'd been drinking as well, So you were like, 215 00:08:40,200 --> 00:08:43,640 Speaker 10: does not sound like that. You were like, Oh, we 216 00:08:43,679 --> 00:08:45,720 Speaker 10: should go out for dinner, but I think you need 217 00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:47,160 Speaker 10: to Can you pick me up. 218 00:08:49,120 --> 00:08:52,880 Speaker 3: WHOA, I was out during the day, but I had 219 00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:57,560 Speaker 3: tried to see April at other occasions but she was 220 00:08:57,800 --> 00:09:00,520 Speaker 3: playing hard to get. And then the one occasion I 221 00:09:00,920 --> 00:09:04,240 Speaker 3: was in Bondai actually, and the one occasion where she 222 00:09:04,360 --> 00:09:07,400 Speaker 3: was like, oh I'm free tonight, I was. I caught 223 00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:10,120 Speaker 3: up with a girlfriend of mine that I had moved 224 00:09:10,120 --> 00:09:11,800 Speaker 3: down as well, and we just hadn't seen each other yet. 225 00:09:11,840 --> 00:09:13,720 Speaker 3: She moved to bond dimit, so we caught up for 226 00:09:13,720 --> 00:09:15,959 Speaker 3: a drink and lunch. I only had like two or 227 00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:19,000 Speaker 3: three beers, but I got a bus and a train there, 228 00:09:19,480 --> 00:09:21,840 Speaker 3: you know, thinking Okay, I'll probably just spend the evening 229 00:09:21,880 --> 00:09:24,880 Speaker 3: in Bondai and see what that's about. 230 00:09:25,559 --> 00:09:27,720 Speaker 1: And then it was like, oh shit. 231 00:09:27,920 --> 00:09:30,440 Speaker 3: So I pretty much stopped whatever I was doing and 232 00:09:30,480 --> 00:09:32,280 Speaker 3: got on a bus and then got on a train. 233 00:09:32,360 --> 00:09:34,800 Speaker 1: But the thing is that I was like, A, You're 234 00:09:34,840 --> 00:09:39,000 Speaker 1: going to have to drive. So I got dropped at her. 235 00:09:39,400 --> 00:09:43,760 Speaker 3: Like pretty much at her place, and then we drove 236 00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:46,880 Speaker 3: to where I was living, which was on the floor 237 00:09:47,080 --> 00:09:49,800 Speaker 3: of Pete's house, who was at the cafe street. 238 00:09:50,120 --> 00:09:51,400 Speaker 1: So just to clear that up. 239 00:09:53,320 --> 00:09:55,000 Speaker 5: Carry on, I'm pretty sure as well. 240 00:09:55,040 --> 00:09:58,480 Speaker 10: You did send in a message I think that's when 241 00:09:58,480 --> 00:09:58,960 Speaker 10: you told me. 242 00:09:59,040 --> 00:10:00,840 Speaker 9: You're like, oh, I can't afford dinner. 243 00:10:02,320 --> 00:10:04,640 Speaker 10: I can't remember how I found out that you couldn't 244 00:10:04,640 --> 00:10:05,480 Speaker 10: pay for dinner much. 245 00:10:05,840 --> 00:10:06,680 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, I'm. 246 00:10:06,559 --> 00:10:09,000 Speaker 10: Pretty sure you like told me straight up, You're like, 247 00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:12,480 Speaker 10: I haven't got money for dinner, but I'd love to 248 00:10:12,520 --> 00:10:13,120 Speaker 10: take you out. 249 00:10:13,440 --> 00:10:17,920 Speaker 3: So I was like, context, context, context is everything, guys. 250 00:10:18,360 --> 00:10:20,240 Speaker 1: I had. I had packed up my car. 251 00:10:20,160 --> 00:10:23,480 Speaker 3: From living in my parents' house, moved here, was working 252 00:10:23,640 --> 00:10:27,000 Speaker 3: three jobs that paid cash, and it was like the 253 00:10:27,040 --> 00:10:30,200 Speaker 3: worst time because I was in Bondou with all my 254 00:10:30,280 --> 00:10:32,680 Speaker 3: money that I had and had pretty much spent it 255 00:10:32,720 --> 00:10:34,679 Speaker 3: on lunch and everything, thinking Okay, I'm just going to 256 00:10:34,760 --> 00:10:36,440 Speaker 3: go home. I'll get paid the next couple of days 257 00:10:36,440 --> 00:10:39,079 Speaker 3: from one of these jobs. But then I didn't want 258 00:10:39,080 --> 00:10:40,000 Speaker 3: to miss the opportunity. 259 00:10:40,080 --> 00:10:43,400 Speaker 9: So honesty, honesty is the best pose. 260 00:10:43,880 --> 00:10:47,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, but I don't think I don't recall saying it. 261 00:10:47,960 --> 00:10:50,319 Speaker 10: Well, I just I can't remember how I found out 262 00:10:50,360 --> 00:10:52,080 Speaker 10: that I had to pay, because I did have to 263 00:10:52,120 --> 00:10:54,000 Speaker 10: pay to that. 264 00:10:54,120 --> 00:10:57,319 Speaker 1: No, let's get to that. Okay, you didn't have to pay. 265 00:10:57,400 --> 00:10:58,240 Speaker 1: He didn't make you pay the. 266 00:10:58,280 --> 00:10:59,280 Speaker 5: End, because no, he did. 267 00:10:59,400 --> 00:11:02,120 Speaker 10: He gave me a discount, didn't he because you worked 268 00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:03,440 Speaker 10: where we end up going for dinner. 269 00:11:04,880 --> 00:11:06,720 Speaker 5: So yeah, we drove. We drove somewhere. 270 00:11:06,760 --> 00:11:09,160 Speaker 9: We didn't really have plans, and I was driving. 271 00:11:09,600 --> 00:11:11,560 Speaker 10: I think we went to go to a sushi place, 272 00:11:11,600 --> 00:11:13,280 Speaker 10: but we couldn't park or something, and then we end 273 00:11:13,400 --> 00:11:14,600 Speaker 10: up going to You were like. 274 00:11:14,559 --> 00:11:16,040 Speaker 9: Oh, I work it. 275 00:11:16,200 --> 00:11:19,000 Speaker 1: I work at this jizza. 276 00:11:18,240 --> 00:11:19,920 Speaker 9: Pizza place, so we'll go there. 277 00:11:20,760 --> 00:11:21,760 Speaker 5: And so we went there. 278 00:11:21,840 --> 00:11:25,079 Speaker 10: I had dinner and whatnot, and obviously all his co 279 00:11:25,320 --> 00:11:33,360 Speaker 10: workers were like behind my back, which I know now. Yeah, 280 00:11:33,440 --> 00:11:35,040 Speaker 10: and then the bill came and I went up to 281 00:11:35,040 --> 00:11:35,800 Speaker 10: pay and. 282 00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:38,080 Speaker 1: Afford to pay, but. 283 00:11:39,559 --> 00:11:39,960 Speaker 5: My name. 284 00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:42,800 Speaker 4: I think the important thing to remember is that you 285 00:11:42,840 --> 00:11:45,920 Speaker 4: can start with the bar really low and then from 286 00:11:45,920 --> 00:11:49,120 Speaker 4: then on everything's a plus. 287 00:11:49,480 --> 00:11:51,160 Speaker 5: Yeah, and you did? You did? 288 00:11:51,240 --> 00:11:55,319 Speaker 9: You used to spoil me rotten in what way? Oh? 289 00:11:55,360 --> 00:11:57,559 Speaker 10: I remember like one of the first Valentine's Days, I 290 00:11:57,559 --> 00:11:58,199 Speaker 10: think you bought. 291 00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:00,160 Speaker 5: Me an iPad mini, buy me jewelry. 292 00:12:00,240 --> 00:12:03,640 Speaker 10: Yeah, like literally spent probably credit card debt. 293 00:12:04,800 --> 00:12:07,080 Speaker 3: It can't make up for that one dinner I couldn't 294 00:12:07,080 --> 00:12:09,920 Speaker 3: pay for. But it was the most important dinner obviously. 295 00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:13,680 Speaker 3: But I mean, at the time, I recall, I was 296 00:12:13,760 --> 00:12:16,400 Speaker 3: like okay, well, the people I was with in Bonder, 297 00:12:16,559 --> 00:12:18,520 Speaker 3: I got to go, and it was like I got 298 00:12:18,559 --> 00:12:18,720 Speaker 3: to go. 299 00:12:18,760 --> 00:12:20,439 Speaker 1: I have to go for a particular reason. 300 00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:24,839 Speaker 3: I could have easily just been like no not yeah. 301 00:12:25,120 --> 00:12:27,880 Speaker 1: Yeah, So that's how that's how the first date went. 302 00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:31,320 Speaker 4: Do you remember thinking on that date? This feels different 303 00:12:31,360 --> 00:12:32,800 Speaker 4: to other dates that I've been on. 304 00:12:33,320 --> 00:12:37,360 Speaker 10: Definitely, she had to pay for it, Like I. 305 00:12:37,320 --> 00:12:42,079 Speaker 1: Feel slightly lighter in the wallet. It wasn't expensive, all right. 306 00:12:42,120 --> 00:12:45,120 Speaker 10: No, and like you know you're talking when we were twenty, 307 00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:49,440 Speaker 10: there was not a high expectation of like long. 308 00:12:49,400 --> 00:12:54,560 Speaker 5: Whining and it was about that. Yeah. Yeah, I enjoyed 309 00:12:54,559 --> 00:12:55,160 Speaker 5: his company. 310 00:12:55,240 --> 00:13:01,839 Speaker 4: Your dog is very into the story. I don't want 311 00:13:01,880 --> 00:13:05,000 Speaker 4: to ask questions that are too personal. Did you have 312 00:13:05,240 --> 00:13:06,560 Speaker 4: a kiss after dinner? 313 00:13:07,200 --> 00:13:07,800 Speaker 1: Was there a kiss? 314 00:13:08,520 --> 00:13:08,640 Speaker 7: Oh? 315 00:13:09,640 --> 00:13:10,600 Speaker 9: I have no idea. 316 00:13:10,880 --> 00:13:13,640 Speaker 1: I can't remember. I think so well, I don't know. 317 00:13:13,600 --> 00:13:15,280 Speaker 9: Where, like wouldn't have been at the restaurant. 318 00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:18,199 Speaker 3: I remember when are we Because we had to stop 319 00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:20,280 Speaker 3: at my place before we went, and I was living 320 00:13:20,320 --> 00:13:24,200 Speaker 3: with Pete and there's three brothers in that house, Like, oh, 321 00:13:24,440 --> 00:13:26,960 Speaker 3: walked in there, had to get some fresh clothes, and 322 00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:28,719 Speaker 3: Pete was like, where are you going? I was like, oh, 323 00:13:28,760 --> 00:13:31,280 Speaker 3: I'm going on a date with April Gates and he 324 00:13:31,400 --> 00:13:31,800 Speaker 3: was like. 325 00:13:31,800 --> 00:13:35,160 Speaker 1: Bullshit, you're lying bullshit. And then I was like and 326 00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:37,319 Speaker 1: then he's like walked out open the front door. It's like, dahn, 327 00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:42,480 Speaker 1: she had a big crash on April. So I stole 328 00:13:42,520 --> 00:13:43,480 Speaker 1: a stolen something. 329 00:13:44,360 --> 00:13:45,600 Speaker 5: I don't think I was ever his, but. 330 00:13:47,240 --> 00:13:49,760 Speaker 1: He still thinks, he still thinks he's got to change. 331 00:13:52,360 --> 00:13:55,600 Speaker 4: For anyone who hasn't been in the room, for anyone 332 00:13:55,600 --> 00:13:59,360 Speaker 4: who hasn't given birth, what's it like, and especially because 333 00:13:59,880 --> 00:14:02,599 Speaker 4: I can't imagine doing that without drugs, but you're in 334 00:14:02,640 --> 00:14:05,960 Speaker 4: a moment of like extreme pain. And then what's it 335 00:14:06,040 --> 00:14:07,839 Speaker 4: like when you get to see your child for the 336 00:14:07,880 --> 00:14:09,520 Speaker 4: first time and you get to hold them? 337 00:14:09,760 --> 00:14:16,680 Speaker 11: Yeah, okay, so hang the fuck on bus. Obviously have 338 00:14:16,760 --> 00:14:21,040 Speaker 11: seen it as dads, but holy Molly, like nothing prepares. 339 00:14:20,640 --> 00:14:21,000 Speaker 5: You for that. 340 00:14:22,640 --> 00:14:26,520 Speaker 11: It is excruciating. And you have a plan, chuck that 341 00:14:26,680 --> 00:14:29,440 Speaker 11: fucking plan in a bin. That plan is not sticking 342 00:14:29,440 --> 00:14:32,600 Speaker 11: to play. That is so true. 343 00:14:32,920 --> 00:14:33,840 Speaker 5: Like I had a plan. 344 00:14:34,080 --> 00:14:36,640 Speaker 11: I mean, I'm like a non planning plant person that 345 00:14:37,040 --> 00:14:38,120 Speaker 11: I was like, Hey, I want to have it in 346 00:14:38,120 --> 00:14:40,360 Speaker 11: the bath, Like I'm real zoning idea I'm going to 347 00:14:40,400 --> 00:14:42,200 Speaker 11: breathe through this thing. Let's have it in the bath. 348 00:14:42,400 --> 00:14:45,640 Speaker 11: I couldn't even fit in the fucking bar my legs, 349 00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:49,120 Speaker 11: my legs were way too long for this public coastural bath. 350 00:14:49,720 --> 00:14:54,280 Speaker 11: And yeah, no, the pain I felt, I think Minnie 351 00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:56,880 Speaker 11: was apparently turned the wrong way inside me and shit, 352 00:14:56,960 --> 00:14:59,400 Speaker 11: and she was taking ages to come out and blah blah. 353 00:14:59,560 --> 00:15:01,600 Speaker 11: My legs felt like they were going to fall off. 354 00:15:01,840 --> 00:15:06,280 Speaker 11: They were numb but also killing. The pain wasn't so 355 00:15:06,360 --> 00:15:08,200 Speaker 11: much in the contractions. It was more in my lower 356 00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:11,880 Speaker 11: back and my legs. I remember my through my contractions, 357 00:15:11,880 --> 00:15:15,160 Speaker 11: I was vomiting so like actually vomiting it all over 358 00:15:15,200 --> 00:15:17,640 Speaker 11: me as well. My mom was the fear in my 359 00:15:17,760 --> 00:15:21,160 Speaker 11: mum's face like said it all to me. I was like, 360 00:15:21,360 --> 00:15:23,640 Speaker 11: I think I'm gonna die, Like I remember saying that 361 00:15:23,680 --> 00:15:26,480 Speaker 11: to her. And she had had beautiful bursts with me 362 00:15:26,520 --> 00:15:28,600 Speaker 11: and my brother. She'd had really quick bursts. And get this, 363 00:15:28,800 --> 00:15:32,520 Speaker 11: she said to me, birth is painless. It doesn't hurt pie. 364 00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:36,680 Speaker 11: I don't know, this shouldn't matter. I don't think this matters. 365 00:15:36,680 --> 00:15:39,120 Speaker 11: But like in my head, my mom. 366 00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:41,880 Speaker 5: Is a stick. She's like a quarter of the size 367 00:15:41,880 --> 00:15:44,240 Speaker 5: of me. So I was like, mum's miniature. 368 00:15:44,640 --> 00:15:47,040 Speaker 11: If she can push out two big heads that me 369 00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:48,120 Speaker 11: and my brother had. 370 00:15:47,920 --> 00:15:49,280 Speaker 5: And it's apparently painless. 371 00:15:49,360 --> 00:15:52,120 Speaker 11: This is a walking apart from me and my baby 372 00:15:52,200 --> 00:15:54,880 Speaker 11: was pretty small, but the way whatever the fuck she 373 00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:58,600 Speaker 11: was doing in there, it was just killing. So yeah, 374 00:15:58,840 --> 00:16:01,720 Speaker 11: birth was far and it was too late. By the 375 00:16:01,760 --> 00:16:04,800 Speaker 11: time I got through all all the hours of dying 376 00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:07,640 Speaker 11: in the whatever with the midwives. 377 00:16:07,240 --> 00:16:09,280 Speaker 5: And stuff, it was just too late to get an epy. 378 00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:11,240 Speaker 11: Like by the time I was like, what's going on, guys, 379 00:16:11,280 --> 00:16:13,920 Speaker 11: can I get the epidural? They were like, well, you've 380 00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:16,000 Speaker 11: literally you've probably only got an hour left. 381 00:16:16,200 --> 00:16:18,400 Speaker 5: You're about to start start pushing. 382 00:16:18,440 --> 00:16:20,760 Speaker 11: You've just done this for like seven hours, like and 383 00:16:20,800 --> 00:16:22,960 Speaker 11: I was like, oh, yeah, okay. Now it's like I'm 384 00:16:23,240 --> 00:16:24,960 Speaker 11: this is a mental thing, and I'm like, okay, I'm 385 00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:26,760 Speaker 11: not getting it, like I'm going to do this because 386 00:16:26,800 --> 00:16:28,560 Speaker 11: I was like, I should have got it like ten hours. 387 00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:32,920 Speaker 11: But when she came out, I was just so fricking 388 00:16:33,040 --> 00:16:36,480 Speaker 11: frothing and relieved that that was over and trying. 389 00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:38,360 Speaker 5: To figure out how to hold this sip slippery little 390 00:16:38,360 --> 00:16:40,480 Speaker 5: sleep because they're so slippery sippery. 391 00:16:40,720 --> 00:16:42,440 Speaker 12: No one tells you that you're going to drop it 392 00:16:43,160 --> 00:16:45,760 Speaker 12: like I was. I wasn't in a bed, I was 393 00:16:45,800 --> 00:16:48,440 Speaker 12: on all fours on the little tile whatever the floor is, 394 00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:52,320 Speaker 12: and she was just so slippery, and I was like, shit, 395 00:16:52,520 --> 00:16:54,520 Speaker 12: we're all covered in blood and vomited and everything. 396 00:16:54,560 --> 00:16:55,880 Speaker 5: I'm going to drop this little egg. 397 00:16:56,520 --> 00:16:59,840 Speaker 11: It took so long of me just catching my breath 398 00:17:00,200 --> 00:17:03,120 Speaker 11: chilling for like a few minutes before my mom and 399 00:17:03,160 --> 00:17:04,280 Speaker 11: the midwives were like. 400 00:17:04,400 --> 00:17:05,920 Speaker 5: What is it? Check what it is? 401 00:17:05,920 --> 00:17:06,640 Speaker 2: Like, what is it? 402 00:17:06,840 --> 00:17:07,440 Speaker 7: You know what? 403 00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:11,359 Speaker 5: What's what's the sex? And so that was super cool, 404 00:17:11,560 --> 00:17:13,160 Speaker 5: and I was like, holy ship. 405 00:17:13,240 --> 00:17:15,320 Speaker 11: I was like almost scared to like look because I 406 00:17:15,359 --> 00:17:17,359 Speaker 11: was like, oh my god, I can't believe I've just 407 00:17:17,400 --> 00:17:20,520 Speaker 11: been so lost in this moment of like just frothing 408 00:17:20,520 --> 00:17:23,240 Speaker 11: that this little slugs in my arms that I haven't 409 00:17:23,280 --> 00:17:25,800 Speaker 11: even thought to look at what it is because I'm 410 00:17:25,840 --> 00:17:29,119 Speaker 11: just so stoked to have a healthy baby that's screaming 411 00:17:29,160 --> 00:17:29,399 Speaker 11: at me. 412 00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:31,160 Speaker 5: And yeah, it was a girl. 413 00:17:31,480 --> 00:17:33,960 Speaker 2: Sometimes. Habilical cords also a bit confusing as well. 414 00:17:36,080 --> 00:17:36,720 Speaker 5: Your homos. 415 00:17:37,880 --> 00:17:38,920 Speaker 1: Did you have to cut it? 416 00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:41,640 Speaker 5: Did you cut it? How hard is it to cut? 417 00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:45,000 Speaker 5: Like Calamari, I was like. 418 00:17:47,280 --> 00:17:49,800 Speaker 11: My mom had the scissors and was like chopping, like 419 00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:51,280 Speaker 11: trying to it's. 420 00:17:51,160 --> 00:17:54,119 Speaker 2: Not easy to shop because these are craps. 421 00:17:54,359 --> 00:17:58,440 Speaker 5: Yeah, literally where the proper get cut. 422 00:17:58,320 --> 00:18:00,680 Speaker 2: Open kids safety. 423 00:18:02,320 --> 00:18:04,600 Speaker 5: Exactly the plastic ones. 424 00:18:07,119 --> 00:18:09,960 Speaker 11: But nah, as you guys know, those moments are ridiculous. 425 00:18:10,040 --> 00:18:12,200 Speaker 5: And then I just remember they kind of. 426 00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:15,159 Speaker 11: Put me in the bed, babies on me, like figuring 427 00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:17,919 Speaker 11: out how to breastfeed and like that. But just like 428 00:18:17,960 --> 00:18:19,679 Speaker 11: you're so off with the fairies, You're just like, what 429 00:18:19,720 --> 00:18:22,640 Speaker 11: the hell? And then they're just like stitching me up 430 00:18:22,680 --> 00:18:26,280 Speaker 11: and doing whatever they're doing. And that's not even I'm 431 00:18:26,280 --> 00:18:28,760 Speaker 11: not even feeling a thing there because you're just so 432 00:18:28,840 --> 00:18:30,320 Speaker 11: wrapped up in like, oh my god, you've got a 433 00:18:30,320 --> 00:18:33,560 Speaker 11: baby on your move and such a cool and my 434 00:18:33,680 --> 00:18:35,480 Speaker 11: mum was so great in those moments. 435 00:18:36,040 --> 00:18:38,560 Speaker 3: The way that Pearl was conceived and you've come to 436 00:18:38,560 --> 00:18:41,239 Speaker 3: be a mum is so unique. Can you talk us 437 00:18:41,240 --> 00:18:44,800 Speaker 3: through when you made that decision or how the conversation 438 00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:48,200 Speaker 3: started to go down that that We were just talking 439 00:18:48,240 --> 00:18:49,679 Speaker 3: about it before. Matt and I were like, how do 440 00:18:49,760 --> 00:18:52,320 Speaker 3: you put that on the table, like, talk us through 441 00:18:52,359 --> 00:18:53,240 Speaker 3: it if you don't mind. 442 00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:56,200 Speaker 7: Of course, of course, kylu My husband is a toaster 443 00:18:56,320 --> 00:19:00,840 Speaker 7: islander and it's really common in Ireland culture to gift 444 00:19:00,920 --> 00:19:03,400 Speaker 7: babies to other family members that are struggling to have 445 00:19:03,560 --> 00:19:05,720 Speaker 7: their own children. And they truly believe that when they 446 00:19:05,720 --> 00:19:08,159 Speaker 7: do that, they get their own after they have their 447 00:19:08,200 --> 00:19:10,600 Speaker 7: own after which happens a lot. 448 00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:13,200 Speaker 2: You're not straight, not just. 449 00:19:13,160 --> 00:19:16,200 Speaker 7: My husband, although my husband did think I was feed 450 00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:17,840 Speaker 7: part fore GM when we first met, so I was like, 451 00:19:18,960 --> 00:19:24,840 Speaker 7: just you listen to what I'm saying. So, yeah, when 452 00:19:24,880 --> 00:19:27,639 Speaker 7: I first started dating Kylou, I met his family and 453 00:19:27,720 --> 00:19:30,879 Speaker 7: I knew that a couple of his nieces, his sister 454 00:19:30,960 --> 00:19:33,760 Speaker 7: had a couple of babies and she gifted her second 455 00:19:33,760 --> 00:19:36,480 Speaker 7: one to his mum. They lived in the same house, 456 00:19:37,080 --> 00:19:38,800 Speaker 7: so I knew of the concept of what you know 457 00:19:39,119 --> 00:19:42,600 Speaker 7: it was about. They call it custom island adoption. There 458 00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:43,959 Speaker 7: is an Island name for it, but I'll just give 459 00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:46,840 Speaker 7: you the English name, and so yeah, it's very common 460 00:19:46,840 --> 00:19:48,760 Speaker 7: and it's the highest form of respect in their culture 461 00:19:48,760 --> 00:19:51,679 Speaker 7: to gift it. Yeah. Nina, my sister in law, she 462 00:19:51,760 --> 00:19:54,520 Speaker 7: knew my story. She knew I've been trying and I'd 463 00:19:54,520 --> 00:19:56,520 Speaker 7: wanted to have babies, and I would have had two 464 00:19:56,600 --> 00:19:58,240 Speaker 7: kids by now if it was like, you know, easy 465 00:19:58,280 --> 00:19:59,919 Speaker 7: to pick a time and you know, it's just not 466 00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:02,040 Speaker 7: in that easy for me with a lot of different 467 00:20:02,119 --> 00:20:04,720 Speaker 7: reasons with the period stuff and being an athlete and 468 00:20:04,800 --> 00:20:08,080 Speaker 7: not wanting to miss events. But so after the Rio Olympics, 469 00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:11,800 Speaker 7: she sat me down with Kylie's older sister and Kylo 470 00:20:11,840 --> 00:20:13,199 Speaker 7: and she said, look, we'd love to gift you a 471 00:20:13,240 --> 00:20:15,560 Speaker 7: baby at some point when the time's right for everyone. 472 00:20:15,880 --> 00:20:16,400 Speaker 2: Holy wow. 473 00:20:17,040 --> 00:20:19,720 Speaker 7: I was like, oh my gosh, huge, amazing. I wasn't 474 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:23,399 Speaker 7: overwhelmed with it because I knew of the practice in 475 00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:24,960 Speaker 7: the culture, so I was like, oh, my gosh, is 476 00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:26,679 Speaker 7: if you do that? I was like, oh wow. I 477 00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:29,120 Speaker 7: was more overwhelmed that, like it could have been happening 478 00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:29,760 Speaker 7: like soon. 479 00:20:29,840 --> 00:20:32,560 Speaker 4: I was like, oh, when you were struggling to fullbring it, 480 00:20:33,280 --> 00:20:35,480 Speaker 4: did you think, hey, this may be an option. 481 00:20:35,640 --> 00:20:37,560 Speaker 7: No, Kylon never really spoke about it, but I did 482 00:20:37,560 --> 00:20:39,560 Speaker 7: speak to his sister Nino about it a fair bit. 483 00:20:39,680 --> 00:20:41,600 Speaker 7: So it was always like kind of in my mind like, oh, 484 00:20:41,680 --> 00:20:43,760 Speaker 7: that that could be an option. But I really do 485 00:20:43,840 --> 00:20:45,600 Speaker 7: hope to still one day like be able to hold 486 00:20:45,600 --> 00:20:48,480 Speaker 7: a baby and still like a baby myself. But if 487 00:20:48,480 --> 00:20:50,480 Speaker 7: this is our only option, that's really cool too, Like 488 00:20:50,640 --> 00:20:54,840 Speaker 7: what a blessing? And so yeah, I guess what year 489 00:20:54,840 --> 00:20:57,280 Speaker 7: are we now, twenty twenty four. I guess at the 490 00:20:57,320 --> 00:21:00,320 Speaker 7: start of yeah, twenty twenty two. We just finished our 491 00:21:01,400 --> 00:21:04,400 Speaker 7: Boomers season in Melbourne. I was playing for Melbourn Boomers 492 00:21:04,480 --> 00:21:06,760 Speaker 7: and I went home and held like a big gathering 493 00:21:06,760 --> 00:21:09,000 Speaker 7: from Kyler's family, my family at my house in cans 494 00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:12,439 Speaker 7: and my sister Nina was like, Taylor, I'm nine weeks pregnant. 495 00:21:12,440 --> 00:21:15,879 Speaker 7: And I was like a wild but She's like, if 496 00:21:15,920 --> 00:21:17,479 Speaker 7: it's a boy, we're going to keep it because we've 497 00:21:17,520 --> 00:21:18,840 Speaker 7: only got the one boy. But if it's a girl, 498 00:21:18,840 --> 00:21:20,040 Speaker 7: we want to gift it to you. And I was like, 499 00:21:20,040 --> 00:21:22,920 Speaker 7: oh my god, Like, when the when's the test? When 500 00:21:22,960 --> 00:21:23,719 Speaker 7: do we know what it is? 501 00:21:23,880 --> 00:21:26,240 Speaker 3: They would have been trying and stuff without you knowing, yeah, 502 00:21:26,280 --> 00:21:26,840 Speaker 3: and then. 503 00:21:26,800 --> 00:21:28,960 Speaker 1: Obviously knowing that they wanted to give to you a baby. 504 00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:32,560 Speaker 3: Yeah, then them saying hey, we're nine weeks pregnant is 505 00:21:32,560 --> 00:21:34,800 Speaker 3: as biggest shock to you as it is to the 506 00:21:34,840 --> 00:21:35,480 Speaker 3: rest of the family. 507 00:21:35,520 --> 00:21:36,840 Speaker 1: I suppose, right, Yeah, No, it. 508 00:21:36,800 --> 00:21:38,480 Speaker 7: Was a bit of a shock, but I really wanted 509 00:21:38,840 --> 00:21:40,679 Speaker 7: to see what sex it was going to be because 510 00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:42,360 Speaker 7: they were going to keep the boy because they'd only 511 00:21:42,400 --> 00:21:44,320 Speaker 7: had one son and they wanted another son. I was like, 512 00:21:44,320 --> 00:21:47,400 Speaker 7: that's totally fair, Like it's your child even if. 513 00:21:47,320 --> 00:21:49,200 Speaker 5: You don't want to give me, so you're still there's 514 00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:49,919 Speaker 5: still like fifty to. 515 00:21:49,880 --> 00:21:50,840 Speaker 2: Fifty with Yeah. 516 00:21:50,840 --> 00:21:52,399 Speaker 7: So as soon as we were able to be got 517 00:21:52,440 --> 00:21:55,040 Speaker 7: the test done and we the doctor's exact words, but 518 00:21:55,240 --> 00:21:57,760 Speaker 7: oh no, that's a hamburger. That's not a sausage, and 519 00:21:58,880 --> 00:22:01,200 Speaker 7: that's a hamburger, Like, oh was that the official term? 520 00:22:01,400 --> 00:22:02,439 Speaker 1: The medical term for it. 521 00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:07,640 Speaker 2: Isn't the same doctor that's reckoning, I. 522 00:22:07,560 --> 00:22:08,520 Speaker 7: Was American. 523 00:22:10,359 --> 00:22:10,719 Speaker 2: Funny. 524 00:22:10,760 --> 00:22:13,520 Speaker 7: So yeah, after that, after we found out the gender, 525 00:22:13,600 --> 00:22:15,680 Speaker 7: then we kind of just got into like, mind you, 526 00:22:15,760 --> 00:22:18,040 Speaker 7: I'm preparing for a World Cup like a major event, 527 00:22:18,240 --> 00:22:21,800 Speaker 7: while I'm preparing to be a mum, and so, you know, 528 00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:24,600 Speaker 7: just telling my family and the close friends that I had, 529 00:22:24,600 --> 00:22:27,119 Speaker 7: and I'm like, what, like they weren't really aware of 530 00:22:27,160 --> 00:22:29,960 Speaker 7: the culture side of all. I don't really. I hadn't 531 00:22:30,000 --> 00:22:32,399 Speaker 7: spoken about, you know, how their family do that before, 532 00:22:32,840 --> 00:22:34,639 Speaker 7: so people kind of took a second to let it 533 00:22:34,680 --> 00:22:35,000 Speaker 7: sink in. 534 00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:37,200 Speaker 4: And yeah, I mean, I think it's beautiful, but when 535 00:22:37,200 --> 00:22:39,560 Speaker 4: you first hear about it, you're like, because it's so 536 00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:43,000 Speaker 4: different to how Western culture would. 537 00:22:42,800 --> 00:22:45,200 Speaker 3: Be, I know, it's kind of like I didn't think 538 00:22:45,200 --> 00:22:46,919 Speaker 3: it was that was the thing, and there'd be so 539 00:22:46,920 --> 00:22:49,120 Speaker 3: many people listening right now that would be especially men. 540 00:22:49,560 --> 00:22:52,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, they would be like I never thought that that 541 00:22:52,359 --> 00:22:52,720 Speaker 1: would be. 542 00:22:53,280 --> 00:22:56,359 Speaker 7: There was a lot of situ Yeah when I posted, 543 00:22:56,359 --> 00:22:58,359 Speaker 7: when it came out, there'd been articles written or whatever. 544 00:22:58,440 --> 00:22:59,960 Speaker 7: There was a lot of troll comings of just people 545 00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:02,199 Speaker 7: that just had no open mind or no idea, like 546 00:23:02,240 --> 00:23:04,399 Speaker 7: and that's fine, Like that's social media these days, right, 547 00:23:04,440 --> 00:23:06,880 Speaker 7: you can't do anything. I don't know that you get 548 00:23:06,880 --> 00:23:08,520 Speaker 7: troll coming to this podcast, though. 549 00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:12,400 Speaker 2: Normally it's just you guys swear too much. Yeah. 550 00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:15,320 Speaker 1: Really, we made front of a dentists and then people 551 00:23:15,320 --> 00:23:15,960 Speaker 1: came after. 552 00:23:15,720 --> 00:23:22,120 Speaker 13: As we love the dentists doctors technically, but anyway, assuming 553 00:23:22,160 --> 00:23:24,359 Speaker 13: that you'd have a bit of a thick skin playing 554 00:23:24,359 --> 00:23:27,080 Speaker 13: professional sport, copying heat from people, we'll still. 555 00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:29,600 Speaker 7: Get to you sometimes though, if you let it. There's 556 00:23:29,640 --> 00:23:31,560 Speaker 7: a lot of stuff, and it can be pretty debilitating 557 00:23:31,560 --> 00:23:33,560 Speaker 7: when you're not in a confident headspace because we've always 558 00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:35,200 Speaker 7: got to maintain a confidence level to be able to 559 00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:38,680 Speaker 7: perform and play under pressure. I don't know what life 560 00:23:38,760 --> 00:23:41,520 Speaker 7: is like to not have pressure, like basketball pressure and 561 00:23:41,600 --> 00:23:43,640 Speaker 7: if I finish one tournament, it's like, well, one game 562 00:23:43,680 --> 00:23:45,680 Speaker 7: will and what's next. There's always pressure for the next thing. 563 00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:48,480 Speaker 7: So I think when I retire in years to come, 564 00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:50,359 Speaker 7: because I feel like I've got a good chunk of 565 00:23:50,400 --> 00:23:52,800 Speaker 7: years left in me, I can't wait to feel like 566 00:23:52,880 --> 00:23:55,600 Speaker 7: what life's like with no pressure basketball pressure. 567 00:23:55,840 --> 00:23:57,560 Speaker 1: So I just it was boring over here. 568 00:24:01,280 --> 00:24:04,840 Speaker 7: Yeah, so once we back to the pearl train of events, 569 00:24:05,280 --> 00:24:07,560 Speaker 7: so once you know, it got closer to the time 570 00:24:07,960 --> 00:24:10,160 Speaker 7: I had the World Cup. We won a bronze medal 571 00:24:10,200 --> 00:24:12,920 Speaker 7: in Sydney. We beat Canada in the bronze medal game. 572 00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:16,159 Speaker 7: Nine days later, I'm in the theater with Nina Wow, 573 00:24:16,800 --> 00:24:19,879 Speaker 7: getting pearly. I was really nervous about the connection piece. 574 00:24:19,960 --> 00:24:22,640 Speaker 7: I was really nervous, like about everything. 575 00:24:22,680 --> 00:24:25,159 Speaker 2: It was just in what way, well. 576 00:24:25,040 --> 00:24:27,240 Speaker 7: Because I hadn't held it. I hadn't, you know, actually 577 00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:30,320 Speaker 7: been growing her in my belly. So I was really 578 00:24:30,320 --> 00:24:32,920 Speaker 7: nervous about yeah, the connection but skinned skin straight away 579 00:24:33,040 --> 00:24:34,440 Speaker 7: was with me and it was beautiful. 580 00:24:35,160 --> 00:24:38,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, wow, yea or. 581 00:24:38,200 --> 00:24:39,960 Speaker 7: Not the skin I held her straight away then, like 582 00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:41,800 Speaker 7: when we went to the recovery redinal skin on skin 583 00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:44,359 Speaker 7: which is really beautiful. But I was also really nervous 584 00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:48,480 Speaker 7: and felt really guilty for taking away Nina's baby. And 585 00:24:48,640 --> 00:24:52,000 Speaker 7: she said to me in the in the recovery room, 586 00:24:52,040 --> 00:24:54,199 Speaker 7: she said, I, I've actually been holding her for you 587 00:24:54,240 --> 00:24:56,880 Speaker 7: this whole time. She's not been my baby this entire time. 588 00:24:56,920 --> 00:24:59,119 Speaker 7: She's been yours, and I've just been looking after it 589 00:24:59,160 --> 00:24:59,399 Speaker 7: for you. 590 00:25:00,119 --> 00:25:03,080 Speaker 1: Disconnected from that. Yeah, really, I suppose you've got her. 591 00:25:03,320 --> 00:25:05,440 Speaker 7: Yeah, so I thought that. I mean, we're really close 592 00:25:05,480 --> 00:25:07,719 Speaker 7: to me and Nina, so we talk a lot, and 593 00:25:07,760 --> 00:25:10,479 Speaker 7: we've got a really great relationship. I guess you kind 594 00:25:10,480 --> 00:25:12,480 Speaker 7: of have to be able to do this. But she 595 00:25:12,520 --> 00:25:14,199 Speaker 7: was actually just down in Sydney last week with her 596 00:25:14,240 --> 00:25:15,639 Speaker 7: four year old son, so that was really great for 597 00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:17,359 Speaker 7: Pearl and Nicholas to be able to have a play. 598 00:25:17,359 --> 00:25:19,960 Speaker 7: But yeah, it was a really I almost would like 599 00:25:20,040 --> 00:25:21,879 Speaker 7: cry anytime, Like when we had to leave the hospital 600 00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:23,080 Speaker 7: and she went to her house and we went to 601 00:25:23,119 --> 00:25:26,080 Speaker 7: ours and I took Pearl. I was so emotional because 602 00:25:26,080 --> 00:25:29,600 Speaker 7: I felt this huge guilt that I didn't anticipate once 603 00:25:29,680 --> 00:25:32,160 Speaker 7: we had Pearl into the world, that I was taking 604 00:25:32,160 --> 00:25:35,000 Speaker 7: her away from Nina. Yeah, so I had to kind 605 00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:40,919 Speaker 7: of overcome. Nina would laugh at me I'm like, oh, yeah, so, 606 00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:44,920 Speaker 7: but she had already kind of done it in Yeah. 607 00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:47,200 Speaker 3: Being a single dad with girls, do you think that 608 00:25:47,320 --> 00:25:49,600 Speaker 3: time so much time with them has helped you build 609 00:25:49,760 --> 00:25:52,159 Speaker 3: a much stronger bond than maybe some other dads have 610 00:25:52,760 --> 00:25:55,119 Speaker 3: that are you know, still with the mom and there's 611 00:25:55,160 --> 00:25:56,040 Speaker 3: that mix. 612 00:25:56,040 --> 00:25:59,959 Speaker 14: This mixed For me, like Ahia, that bond is unbreakable 613 00:26:01,280 --> 00:26:04,000 Speaker 14: purely because from the day she was born, it's been 614 00:26:04,040 --> 00:26:09,960 Speaker 14: me and her for different circumstances gg I don't get 615 00:26:09,960 --> 00:26:13,320 Speaker 14: as much, which is hard for dads as well, right, 616 00:26:13,400 --> 00:26:18,080 Speaker 14: because it's small than I would say the stereotypical you 617 00:26:18,119 --> 00:26:23,199 Speaker 14: know break up where the mother mother has majority. You know, 618 00:26:23,280 --> 00:26:27,439 Speaker 14: we always want more, but that's it's different, you know, 619 00:26:27,560 --> 00:26:29,920 Speaker 14: like we I hope that. The hard thing is I 620 00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:32,040 Speaker 14: wanted to look forward to seeing me every time she 621 00:26:32,080 --> 00:26:34,600 Speaker 14: sees me, so as a dad when you've got her, 622 00:26:34,640 --> 00:26:37,560 Speaker 14: I don't want to I spoil her. But how much 623 00:26:37,560 --> 00:26:41,840 Speaker 14: do you spoil them that they don't benefit the right way? 624 00:26:42,000 --> 00:26:45,280 Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying. I've got thursdays. 625 00:26:46,240 --> 00:26:49,199 Speaker 4: Other days it's called daddy doing night and and we 626 00:26:49,240 --> 00:26:50,840 Speaker 4: have like swimming in the morning, and it's you know, 627 00:26:50,880 --> 00:26:53,480 Speaker 4: it's the one day where Laura is working my wife, 628 00:26:53,600 --> 00:26:56,240 Speaker 4: and so she's me and the girls and and it's 629 00:26:56,240 --> 00:26:58,640 Speaker 4: this hard balance of I wanted to be a really memorable, 630 00:26:58,720 --> 00:27:01,520 Speaker 4: enjoyable experience, and so you want to give them things 631 00:27:01,520 --> 00:27:04,280 Speaker 4: that they enjoy. But at the same time, it's also 632 00:27:04,359 --> 00:27:07,720 Speaker 4: hard when it's just a bad day. Yeah, sometimes the 633 00:27:07,760 --> 00:27:10,080 Speaker 4: girls didn't have a good sleep, they're cranky, they don't 634 00:27:10,080 --> 00:27:11,960 Speaker 4: want to get their swimmers and got to swimming lessons, 635 00:27:12,119 --> 00:27:14,320 Speaker 4: and so it ends up being a shit day where 636 00:27:14,359 --> 00:27:17,280 Speaker 4: I'd spent disciplining And then how was it for you? 637 00:27:17,320 --> 00:27:19,879 Speaker 4: When you do that little window with Gigi and you 638 00:27:19,960 --> 00:27:22,600 Speaker 4: build it up to be something great and then it's not, and. 639 00:27:22,560 --> 00:27:25,439 Speaker 14: You sometimes heartbreaking because you got you've only got a 640 00:27:25,440 --> 00:27:27,960 Speaker 14: short period of time, like a couple of days with 641 00:27:28,040 --> 00:27:30,480 Speaker 14: her in a week, and if it's not a good time, 642 00:27:31,320 --> 00:27:33,240 Speaker 14: you're disappointed and it's sad because you've got to drop 643 00:27:33,240 --> 00:27:35,440 Speaker 14: it back on a bad note. Yeah, it just hasn't 644 00:27:35,480 --> 00:27:37,920 Speaker 14: gone to plan, and you don't have that every day 645 00:27:38,080 --> 00:27:40,720 Speaker 14: time to be with her for her, you know. So 646 00:27:40,840 --> 00:27:43,720 Speaker 14: it is hard for dads like that, and it just 647 00:27:43,720 --> 00:27:45,359 Speaker 14: doesn't always care to plan, right. 648 00:27:45,800 --> 00:27:48,440 Speaker 3: Especially they probably get older as well and they're into 649 00:27:48,440 --> 00:27:51,760 Speaker 3: their own things or they might. I mean with my daughter, 650 00:27:51,800 --> 00:27:54,399 Speaker 3: she's so young that like if we have a tip, 651 00:27:54,560 --> 00:27:56,200 Speaker 3: you know, we can get over pretty quick. You know 652 00:27:56,240 --> 00:27:58,520 Speaker 3: when that as they get, as she gets older and 653 00:27:58,600 --> 00:28:01,800 Speaker 3: more stubborn and illien herself and can be like, well, 654 00:28:01,840 --> 00:28:03,359 Speaker 3: I'm going to hold this grudge against you now because 655 00:28:03,359 --> 00:28:04,480 Speaker 3: that's not fair what you did. 656 00:28:04,680 --> 00:28:06,960 Speaker 1: Whatever it might be, it must be really hard. 657 00:28:07,040 --> 00:28:09,600 Speaker 3: I can't imagine that drop off at the end of 658 00:28:09,640 --> 00:28:12,679 Speaker 3: your time and you haven't been able to mend that bridge, 659 00:28:12,680 --> 00:28:15,240 Speaker 3: and then you've got to wait all that this time to. 660 00:28:15,040 --> 00:28:18,000 Speaker 14: Try and try and have that moment and it's your 661 00:28:18,040 --> 00:28:20,480 Speaker 14: own daughter, you know, Yeah, it's hard to take you 662 00:28:21,040 --> 00:28:23,760 Speaker 14: as you go back again to all you ever think 663 00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:26,359 Speaker 14: of is as someone as a kid or just growing up, 664 00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:29,520 Speaker 14: is having that perfect family right where you've got your 665 00:28:29,600 --> 00:28:33,240 Speaker 14: kids and you know, I was brought up in Well 666 00:28:33,280 --> 00:28:34,960 Speaker 14: it didn't end up being a perfect family, but it 667 00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:36,600 Speaker 14: was from my childhood. 668 00:28:37,200 --> 00:28:38,600 Speaker 2: And then you get to a point where it's just 669 00:28:38,680 --> 00:28:40,720 Speaker 2: not and you've got to deal with it. 670 00:28:40,760 --> 00:28:43,200 Speaker 14: But that's like, you know, we've all got we've all 671 00:28:43,200 --> 00:28:45,080 Speaker 14: got ways of dealing with different things and things we've 672 00:28:45,120 --> 00:28:48,880 Speaker 14: got to navigate through and it's a constant challenge for me. 673 00:28:49,760 --> 00:28:51,800 Speaker 14: But I love I love my girls, and I love 674 00:28:51,840 --> 00:28:52,480 Speaker 14: bring and dads. 675 00:28:56,600 --> 00:29:00,720 Speaker 4: Well well, well, well, well, well here we are ash. 676 00:29:00,880 --> 00:29:02,640 Speaker 1: It's nice to revisit those voices. 677 00:29:04,280 --> 00:29:06,120 Speaker 4: Trying to say that with a really serious face sound 678 00:29:06,280 --> 00:29:08,120 Speaker 4: like someone who's got is this schizophrenia? 679 00:29:08,240 --> 00:29:13,320 Speaker 1: That's what I say to myself every night podcast. I 680 00:29:13,360 --> 00:29:16,000 Speaker 1: can't wait to lay down and revisit those voices. 681 00:29:19,280 --> 00:29:22,880 Speaker 4: Look, the series are best of episodes because we are 682 00:29:22,920 --> 00:29:27,080 Speaker 4: having a delicious, wonderful, relaxing break over the Christmas period. 683 00:29:27,400 --> 00:29:29,520 Speaker 2: So we will be back with you next week for 684 00:29:29,680 --> 00:29:31,520 Speaker 2: another best of episode. 685 00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:34,160 Speaker 3: And if you've enjoyed that, please leave us a review, 686 00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:37,960 Speaker 3: a New Year's review. Some would say, well said five 687 00:29:38,000 --> 00:29:42,080 Speaker 3: stars and then join us on socials, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, 688 00:29:42,120 --> 00:29:42,680 Speaker 3: and we love. 689 00:29:42,560 --> 00:29:45,160 Speaker 4: You all goes without saying see you next year. We'd 690 00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:47,840 Speaker 4: be nothing without you. We appreciate your support. 691 00:29:48,000 --> 00:29:53,200 Speaker 1: You sound desperate now we are as see you next year. 692 00:29:59,400 --> 00:29:59,560 Speaker 14: Two. 693 00:29:59,600 --> 00:30:04,080 Speaker 4: Doting Podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout Australia 694 00:30:04,200 --> 00:30:06,720 Speaker 4: and the connections to land, sea and community. 695 00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:09,480 Speaker 3: We pay our respects to their elders past and present 696 00:30:09,560 --> 00:30:12,640 Speaker 3: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestrate Islander 697 00:30:12,680 --> 00:30:13,440 Speaker 3: peoples today. 698 00:30:14,000 --> 00:30:16,320 Speaker 1: This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land.