WEBVTT - The Evolution of the Insta-Mum 0:00:00.240 --> 0:00:04.160 Today's episode is brought to you by Olaplex. This is Outspoken, 0:00:04.280 --> 0:00:07.920 the podcast it's not afraid to say exactly what you're thinking. 0:00:08.360 --> 0:00:12.240 Our names are Amy, Kate and Sophie Torba. We're identical triplets, 0:00:12.280 --> 0:00:16.160 but we often don't have identical opinions, so sometimes things 0:00:16.160 --> 0:00:21.079 can get heated. Outspoken covers all things reality TV, influencers, 0:00:21.480 --> 0:00:26.640 entertainment and issues facing women. That is so fat Thank you. 0:00:28.440 --> 0:00:31.200 Welcome back to another episode of Outspoken. Thanks so much 0:00:31.240 --> 0:00:33.920 for joining us. As usual, you're joined by Kate and Sophie, 0:00:33.920 --> 0:00:36.360 and we've got little Archie here in the studio, which 0:00:36.400 --> 0:00:38.800 is of course Sophie's dog. And so if you have 0:00:38.880 --> 0:00:43.800 a pretty embarrassing confession about something you've recently purchased for Archie, 0:00:43.880 --> 0:00:45.920 I do. I'm going to look like an absolute psycho. 0:00:46.000 --> 0:00:49.240 I've bought him a dog stroller. And this is because 0:00:49.280 --> 0:00:52.600 he cannot stand to be away from me for longer 0:00:52.640 --> 0:00:54.680 than really a couple of minutes. I can't be out 0:00:54.680 --> 0:00:56.720 of his sight. He's obsessed with me at the moment. 0:00:57.120 --> 0:01:00.280 So this is basically like a baby stroller, but mini 0:01:00.320 --> 0:01:02.200 one for dogs. It is so cute. They've got this 0:01:02.240 --> 0:01:04.440 little area that where you can zip them in. So 0:01:04.440 --> 0:01:05.720 I mean, I feel like people are going to be 0:01:05.720 --> 0:01:07.840 looking at me assuming this is a baby, and then 0:01:07.880 --> 0:01:10.160 getting a surprise when they see a beautiful dog. I 0:01:10.200 --> 0:01:11.880 am not going for a walk with you. If you're 0:01:11.880 --> 0:01:15.240 pushing that, that is so embarrassing. I think it's kind 0:01:15.240 --> 0:01:17.679 of cool because of course Archie's not allowed to go 0:01:17.720 --> 0:01:20.520 on walks yet because he hasn't had all this vaccination, 0:01:20.680 --> 0:01:22.319 so it's a great way that he can come on. 0:01:22.440 --> 0:01:24.760 So for my little lunchtime walks. Aren't you just teaching 0:01:24.840 --> 0:01:26.640 him that he's never going to be left alone. I 0:01:26.640 --> 0:01:28.840 feel like this is going to backfire on you eventually. 0:01:29.000 --> 0:01:31.280 It's more for my neighbors who can't stand his bloody 0:01:31.280 --> 0:01:34.880 howling the whole time. The funniest thing about getting Archie, though, 0:01:34.959 --> 0:01:37.960 is that I've now somehow teamed up with two other girls. 0:01:38.160 --> 0:01:40.960 Will connect with two girls who also have the puppies 0:01:41.000 --> 0:01:43.039 from the same litter, and they have been messaging me 0:01:43.200 --> 0:01:45.240 saying they have had the weeks from hell. It's like 0:01:45.280 --> 0:01:48.000 a mom's group online. It's like it just reminds me 0:01:48.000 --> 0:01:49.840 of what I'll be like as a mum, just bitching 0:01:49.840 --> 0:01:52.040 about my child. Like yeah, they didn't go to sleep, 0:01:52.080 --> 0:01:54.840 and they they're around me all the time. My favorite 0:01:54.840 --> 0:01:57.520 story this week from you about Archie was the fact 0:01:57.560 --> 0:01:59.880 that you've had him in this little run that's basically 0:02:00.160 --> 0:02:02.280 a big cage for him to sleep in, and he 0:02:02.360 --> 0:02:04.840 managed to climb out of it. Now, Amy, it's not 0:02:04.880 --> 0:02:07.920 a cage, it's a great sorry, a crag we hate 0:02:07.960 --> 0:02:11.400 has a rather nasty kind of dat. Anyway, he climbed 0:02:11.440 --> 0:02:14.799 out of his sleeping enclosure, climbed up the stairs, which 0:02:14.840 --> 0:02:17.000 you didn't even know he could do, and scratched on 0:02:17.040 --> 0:02:18.720 your door to come in. Well, it's pretty crazy. I 0:02:18.800 --> 0:02:21.320 managed to slide open the sliding door as well. So 0:02:21.360 --> 0:02:24.440 he's a very very talented dog, very intelligent dog. Well, 0:02:24.440 --> 0:02:26.240 we were having people vote whether he should have been 0:02:26.280 --> 0:02:28.400 called Manukah or whether he should have been called Archie. 0:02:28.440 --> 0:02:33.560 I think he should have been killed Houdini. That's so late, Ken, 0:02:33.600 --> 0:02:36.280 would you start taking pictures of yourself? Your sister's going 0:02:36.320 --> 0:02:39.000 to jail. Now, let's get into our first topic, which 0:02:39.040 --> 0:02:41.679 is the evolution of the instamum. Now, I've got to say, 0:02:41.720 --> 0:02:43.640 these types of accounts have been popping up in my 0:02:43.680 --> 0:02:45.560 feed recently, and I think it's because I'm in my 0:02:45.639 --> 0:02:48.920 thirties now, and I've got to say I love following 0:02:48.960 --> 0:02:51.280 these accounts because I feel like a fly on the 0:02:51.320 --> 0:02:53.960 wall looking into what potentially could be my life in 0:02:54.080 --> 0:02:58.840 five years time. What a very scary thought. Well, I 0:02:58.840 --> 0:03:00.359 don't know, you know what I mean, in the next 0:03:00.440 --> 0:03:04.400 coming years. There always seems to be that stereotypical instamum. 0:03:04.480 --> 0:03:08.560 She's always young, blonde, everything's organized, she's got one of 0:03:08.560 --> 0:03:11.120 those pantries that's got labels over everything. Yeah, and the 0:03:11.200 --> 0:03:15.200 kids are always pretentious names and immaculately dressed. Yeah. When 0:03:15.240 --> 0:03:18.160 you say pretentious, they've always got a unique name, don't they. Yeah, 0:03:18.200 --> 0:03:20.160 so unique name that you've never heard of and is 0:03:20.320 --> 0:03:23.160 very marketable. I suppose that is interesting you say that, 0:03:23.200 --> 0:03:25.200 because then I think quite a number of women have 0:03:25.360 --> 0:03:28.200 made a niche or a market for themselves by showing 0:03:28.240 --> 0:03:30.000 what it's really like to be a mum, like that 0:03:30.120 --> 0:03:32.639 really raw side. Yeah. Well, I feel like there's two 0:03:32.720 --> 0:03:36.160 kinds of Instagram accounts. You're either the mother that pretends 0:03:36.160 --> 0:03:38.760 that the child's never vomited or never poos and it's 0:03:38.840 --> 0:03:42.640 everything's all rosy and perfectly curated, or there is the 0:03:42.720 --> 0:03:45.120 mum that sort of opens up about what life is 0:03:45.240 --> 0:03:47.760 really like as a mum. Yeah. Well, I feel like 0:03:47.760 --> 0:03:50.640 with the introduction of Instagram Stories, a lot of the 0:03:50.720 --> 0:03:53.160 mums sort of share a bit more details on the story, 0:03:53.160 --> 0:03:57.280 but the feed often remains pretty much curated. Yeah, that's true. 0:03:57.360 --> 0:03:59.240 I was gonna say the reason I thought this topic 0:03:59.240 --> 0:04:01.240 would be good to talk about is because I was 0:04:01.280 --> 0:04:05.320 watching last night Chloe Zepp, who's a massive influencer. She's 0:04:05.480 --> 0:04:09.280 pregnant with Mitchell Orvil, who's another huge influencer his baby, 0:04:09.640 --> 0:04:12.120 and they did a house tour and they were showing 0:04:12.120 --> 0:04:14.680 off the nursery and it was literally like brand deal here, 0:04:14.760 --> 0:04:16.640 brand deal here, we got this for free, this, this 0:04:16.680 --> 0:04:18.599 and this, and it just made me think of the 0:04:18.760 --> 0:04:22.160 money that is involved in being a mummy blogger. Well, 0:04:22.160 --> 0:04:24.840 they are really turning a baby into a commodity at 0:04:24.839 --> 0:04:26.560 the moment, aren't they. As you said, there's so many 0:04:26.560 --> 0:04:28.800 brand deals to be made, and it's kind of that 0:04:28.880 --> 0:04:32.000 next evolution for a lot of influences. Yeah, exactly right. 0:04:32.040 --> 0:04:34.160 So I suppose there's two camps. There's the people that 0:04:34.240 --> 0:04:37.120 already have the following that they're documenting their life, so 0:04:37.160 --> 0:04:39.960 it's a natural progression into being an instamum, or there 0:04:39.960 --> 0:04:42.120 are those people that just take off because they're sharing 0:04:42.120 --> 0:04:44.279 all their mum hacks and somehow they just make it 0:04:44.320 --> 0:04:46.280 big and get a massive following. Well that's a bit 0:04:46.400 --> 0:04:48.240 like what happened to Tammy Hembro, who, of course we 0:04:48.240 --> 0:04:51.800 were talking about last week. Tammy actually got famous after 0:04:52.080 --> 0:04:54.760 she gave birth to her son. I feel like hers 0:04:54.839 --> 0:04:56.839 is more about being a hot mum, though, because I 0:04:56.839 --> 0:04:58.960 feel like the most recent well, the accounts that I 0:04:59.040 --> 0:05:02.560 follow a lot usually very much organizational base. So there's 0:05:02.600 --> 0:05:06.000 Steph Pace and she has her own planners and her 0:05:06.040 --> 0:05:08.680 pantry is just amazing. She has a YouTube channel where 0:05:08.720 --> 0:05:11.160 she shares all of her organizational tips and I just 0:05:11.440 --> 0:05:13.520 hang on every one of her stories. I just find 0:05:13.560 --> 0:05:16.320 it so fascinating. But don't you think it makes other 0:05:16.400 --> 0:05:19.200 mums feel like shit? Because I wonder if there's this 0:05:19.360 --> 0:05:22.120 side of it where I know we've spoken before in 0:05:22.160 --> 0:05:24.920 the past about hate following, and I'm sure there would 0:05:24.920 --> 0:05:27.680 be a lot of mums who are hate following the instamums. 0:05:27.760 --> 0:05:29.800 Oh definitely. There was a study in Canada and it 0:05:29.800 --> 0:05:33.239 found that social media makes mums feel insecure about their parenting. 0:05:33.560 --> 0:05:35.800 So it's sort of there's so many different areas that 0:05:35.839 --> 0:05:38.720 they feel insecure, So they feel like their meals aren't 0:05:38.760 --> 0:05:41.960 as healthy and yummy, their postpart and body isn't as good, 0:05:42.279 --> 0:05:44.680 maybe their husband doesn't adore them as much as the 0:05:44.720 --> 0:05:48.159 other husbands. There's so many different parts that they compare 0:05:48.200 --> 0:05:50.720 themselves to. And I suppose this is really damaging when 0:05:50.760 --> 0:05:53.520 you reflect that a lot of people do suffer from 0:05:53.520 --> 0:05:56.159 post natal depressions, so it would be really hard sitting 0:05:56.160 --> 0:05:59.080 there struggling. And then you're going onto Instagram and there's 0:05:59.080 --> 0:06:02.120 all these people with their beautiful lives and their perfect 0:06:02.200 --> 0:06:04.960 pantries and everything's clean, and their kids are gorgeous and 0:06:05.200 --> 0:06:08.599 behaving and sleeping through the night, when in fact, insta 0:06:08.680 --> 0:06:12.760 mums are very performative. It's not really what's happening. It's 0:06:12.800 --> 0:06:15.080 really that sense of comparison, isn't it. I mean, it's 0:06:15.120 --> 0:06:17.320 the first time in history that we've been able to 0:06:17.400 --> 0:06:18.960 kind of be a fly on the wall of what 0:06:19.320 --> 0:06:22.000 mums are doing. So, I mean, you know, back in 0:06:22.040 --> 0:06:23.720 the day, when you just have your photo album to 0:06:23.720 --> 0:06:26.680 flick through, you couldn't compare whether your child's birthday party 0:06:26.760 --> 0:06:29.000 was better than the next. I suppose it also opens 0:06:29.040 --> 0:06:30.919 up to a lot of judgment on what mums on 0:06:30.960 --> 0:06:34.120 Instagram are doing too. Definitely. The thing is with a 0:06:34.160 --> 0:06:37.800 lot of the YouTubers or instagrammers who were popular before 0:06:37.839 --> 0:06:41.600 having their baby, you'll find that they document every single stage. 0:06:41.640 --> 0:06:45.440 So using Sarah's day as an example, she announced that 0:06:45.800 --> 0:06:47.279 she was having a baby and that it was a 0:06:47.279 --> 0:06:49.719 complete surprise, and I remember seeing a scene that she 0:06:49.800 --> 0:06:52.159 put up and she was crying. Well, she had just 0:06:52.160 --> 0:06:53.920 found out she was pregnant and it was a real 0:06:53.960 --> 0:06:56.919 shock because she's had pcos, so it was unlikely that 0:06:56.920 --> 0:06:59.960 she could have children. Yeah, but he wasn't planned either, 0:07:00.120 --> 0:07:02.039 so it was a real that kind of scary moment 0:07:02.080 --> 0:07:04.400 where she's like, oh my goodness this. You know, I'm 0:07:04.440 --> 0:07:06.279 so happy that I'm having him, but I'm also so 0:07:06.400 --> 0:07:09.920 scared because I haven't planned this. And I remember thinking, oh, 0:07:09.960 --> 0:07:11.920 my goodness, what's he going to feel like when he 0:07:12.040 --> 0:07:14.080 sees this. But I think the bigger part of it 0:07:14.200 --> 0:07:16.520 was the fact that a lot of these videos, you know, 0:07:16.760 --> 0:07:19.320 his name was teased. There are a lot of eyebrows 0:07:19.400 --> 0:07:21.880 raised about the fact that it was kind of teased 0:07:21.920 --> 0:07:24.040 to get views and clicks and money. Well, how do 0:07:24.080 --> 0:07:25.960 you feel about that, because I kind of think, Wow, 0:07:26.000 --> 0:07:28.720 if I gone through childbirth and I put that video 0:07:28.760 --> 0:07:31.400 up and it's going to make me eight grand well, bloody, 0:07:31.440 --> 0:07:34.160 how I deserve it after giving birth to a child. Yeah, 0:07:34.160 --> 0:07:37.240 it's a hard one because Sarah's Day and other YouTubers 0:07:37.360 --> 0:07:40.200 like her, they document their whole life and people there's 0:07:40.200 --> 0:07:42.920 actually a demand for people to see it. It is 0:07:42.920 --> 0:07:45.720 hard though, because it comes down to consent and there's 0:07:45.800 --> 0:07:49.080 ethical reasons, like you know, Fox, he might think it's 0:07:49.080 --> 0:07:51.440 great at the moment, but what happens when he's fifteen 0:07:51.520 --> 0:07:53.840 and people are pulling up, Oh, hey, this is you 0:07:53.920 --> 0:07:56.240 being born, or this is your first birthday, or remember 0:07:56.240 --> 0:07:58.840 when you did this? And that was embarrassing. And there 0:07:58.880 --> 0:08:01.400 was actually a kid in the US whose mum was 0:08:01.440 --> 0:08:04.880 an instant mum and she would not stop sharing photos 0:08:04.880 --> 0:08:06.480 of this kid. This kid said, look much, I don't 0:08:06.480 --> 0:08:08.360 want to be in the photos. Can you stop taking them? 0:08:08.560 --> 0:08:10.280 And it got to the point where he actually had 0:08:10.320 --> 0:08:12.400 to buy a hoodie that said don't take my photo 0:08:12.520 --> 0:08:14.920 on there, because she can hardly upload a photo like 0:08:14.920 --> 0:08:17.600 that that shows that he's not consenting to it. How 0:08:17.640 --> 0:08:19.520 old was he? I think he was eight or ten? 0:08:19.640 --> 0:08:21.760 And this is what This is what makes me think 0:08:21.800 --> 0:08:25.280 that in the future social media won't be around because 0:08:25.320 --> 0:08:28.080 there's so many kids. That's a very big state because 0:08:28.160 --> 0:08:30.400 they're so let me explain why. Because there are so 0:08:30.400 --> 0:08:32.440 many kids growing up with it, and it's kind of 0:08:32.720 --> 0:08:35.000 it'd be nerdy for your parents to do it, you 0:08:35.040 --> 0:08:37.160 know what I mean, Like whenever there's something your parents do, 0:08:37.280 --> 0:08:39.199 you don't want to turn into that person. Well, it's 0:08:39.200 --> 0:08:41.400 funny how things evolve, though, because I remember it was 0:08:41.520 --> 0:08:44.200 very taboo to actually put pictures of babies on the 0:08:44.240 --> 0:08:48.080 internet for I mean obviously sinister reasons, and now it's 0:08:48.080 --> 0:08:50.520 something that everyone's posts pictures of their baby. I mean, 0:08:50.559 --> 0:08:52.760 I find it a bit too far when people post 0:08:53.320 --> 0:08:56.440 the ultrasound shot. I always think that's a bit yung, 0:08:56.920 --> 0:08:58.880 do you know what though, So back to your point 0:08:58.880 --> 0:09:02.320 about people leaving social media, I don't know if they'll 0:09:02.400 --> 0:09:04.760 leave it completely, but I feel like everyone's going to 0:09:04.800 --> 0:09:07.600 become super private because it's going to become a bit 0:09:07.640 --> 0:09:10.960 sort of unclassy to put lots of information out about yourself. 0:09:11.160 --> 0:09:13.400 And you see it with celebrities. As soon as they 0:09:13.440 --> 0:09:16.560 find this level of fame, suddenly they become ultra private 0:09:16.679 --> 0:09:19.000 about their lives, and we're kind of seeing that with 0:09:19.080 --> 0:09:22.080 some of the big Australian YouTubers, like people like Shany 0:09:22.120 --> 0:09:25.240 Grimman and Michael Finch. They are sharing less and less 0:09:25.240 --> 0:09:28.680 about their lives and they're sort of when they post videos, 0:09:28.679 --> 0:09:31.840 it's back to what they originally posted, all about makeup. 0:09:32.240 --> 0:09:34.160 So we're seeing this sort of change in the way 0:09:34.160 --> 0:09:37.240 people are sharing information about themselves. And on the topic 0:09:37.280 --> 0:09:40.480 of the children that are unwittingly involved in these Instagram accounts, 0:09:40.520 --> 0:09:43.640 a psychologists compared it to child stars and they said 0:09:43.679 --> 0:09:46.280 that these kids kind of find it really hard readjusting 0:09:46.320 --> 0:09:48.560 to normal life because they're used to getting their photo 0:09:48.600 --> 0:09:52.080 taken and I suppose thinking about that, coupled with the 0:09:52.320 --> 0:09:55.440 likes and comments that they also then receive, it could 0:09:55.440 --> 0:09:57.840 be very damaging. Well, what do you think of the 0:09:57.880 --> 0:10:00.120 parents who push their kids into doing those u you 0:10:00.280 --> 0:10:02.520 know the toy testers. I know Roxy just Senko has 0:10:02.559 --> 0:10:05.240 been doing that, and I've got two schools of thought 0:10:05.240 --> 0:10:06.920 on it. I think it's kind of clever in a 0:10:06.960 --> 0:10:10.000 way because they are setting their kids up to make 0:10:10.040 --> 0:10:12.440 a lot of money in the future. But then I 0:10:12.480 --> 0:10:15.160 see the other side where you're also setting your kids 0:10:15.240 --> 0:10:19.959 up to receive bullying messages or ridicules. Yeah, I agree. 0:10:20.040 --> 0:10:23.000 I think that if a child shows genuine interest in 0:10:23.080 --> 0:10:25.480 wanting to make a channel and being creative, then I 0:10:25.480 --> 0:10:28.240 think that's fine. But if you're the one fueling the 0:10:28.480 --> 0:10:31.439 motivations of that child, I think that's a very different story. 0:10:31.559 --> 0:10:33.280 I don't know. I mean, I don't have children, but 0:10:33.320 --> 0:10:36.040 I would find it really hard allowing them at you know, 0:10:36.160 --> 0:10:38.600 six or seven years old, to be putting themselves in 0:10:38.640 --> 0:10:41.480 the public sphere open to ridicule and comments. I just 0:10:41.559 --> 0:10:45.520 think maybe once they're eighteen they can go and do 0:10:45.559 --> 0:10:47.600 what they want or sixteen, But I just feel like 0:10:47.559 --> 0:10:49.520 they're too young to be an influencer. Then you've gotta 0:10:49.520 --> 0:10:52.200 start so young, I know, but I just think there's 0:10:52.200 --> 0:10:54.320 more to life than being an influencer. I feel like 0:10:54.400 --> 0:10:57.560 it's But that's the weird thing because back in the day, 0:10:57.559 --> 0:10:59.600 everyone wanted to be singers, actors, and it's like, yeah, 0:10:59.600 --> 0:11:01.960 you can keep dreaming, but these kids can actually start 0:11:02.360 --> 0:11:04.439 doing it now. But do we think in the future 0:11:04.480 --> 0:11:06.760 that there will be massive brand deals like there are 0:11:06.800 --> 0:11:09.160 on offer? I mean, you know, with YouTube, they've already 0:11:09.160 --> 0:11:11.880 made it more difficult for kids to reach that level 0:11:11.880 --> 0:11:14.840 of fame, and you know, the monetization has changed, there's 0:11:14.920 --> 0:11:17.160 changing platforms, so kids are going to make your big 0:11:17.440 --> 0:11:19.640 TikTok or wherever it is, there's always going to be 0:11:19.640 --> 0:11:22.840 money there. Just on the topic of kids doing really 0:11:22.880 --> 0:11:27.439 well online. A YouTuber that we follow is Anastasia kings 0:11:27.440 --> 0:11:29.959 North and she's huge and she's from England. We've spoken 0:11:29.960 --> 0:11:32.360 about her a few times. She actually became She started 0:11:32.360 --> 0:11:34.839 her channel when she was only eleven, so she's grown 0:11:34.880 --> 0:11:37.920 it over eight years, which is pretty crazy. Eleven. Yeah, 0:11:38.080 --> 0:11:40.000 thank god. Well, the thing is she's got a little 0:11:40.080 --> 0:11:43.080 brother who's about five, and his name is Atticus and 0:11:43.200 --> 0:11:45.600 he is he appears in a lot of her videos 0:11:45.840 --> 0:11:48.160 and he's kind of got cult status in the UK. 0:11:48.400 --> 0:11:51.160 People will spot him when he's out shopping and him 0:11:51.160 --> 0:11:55.640 and stuff. Yeah, and he recently launched an Instagram account 0:11:55.800 --> 0:11:58.000 and I think he got like one hundred thousand follows 0:11:58.040 --> 0:12:00.000 in the first day. And there was something of felt 0:12:00.240 --> 0:12:02.920 really I felt really weird and uncomfortable about it, Like 0:12:03.000 --> 0:12:05.000 I didn't go and follow him. I sort of draw 0:12:05.040 --> 0:12:07.959 a line. It's a bit creepy. Well, just going back 0:12:07.960 --> 0:12:10.839 for a second to the birth vlogs. It's really interesting 0:12:10.880 --> 0:12:13.800 to analyze because as young women, it's the first time 0:12:13.920 --> 0:12:17.800 I've ever seen the whole process of childbirth and the 0:12:17.920 --> 0:12:20.720 lead up and how hideous it looks to be pregnant. 0:12:20.720 --> 0:12:23.280 And I wanted to myself, is this going to stop 0:12:23.320 --> 0:12:26.080 women from actually wanting to have kids? What's funny because 0:12:26.080 --> 0:12:28.000 when you're at school, I remember they used to put 0:12:28.040 --> 0:12:30.480 that video on and I think it showed a birth 0:12:30.520 --> 0:12:34.440 and it was very graphic. This is more showing the 0:12:34.480 --> 0:12:36.960 process of labor. I mean, I know the one I 0:12:37.000 --> 0:12:39.160 watched with Sarah's Day, and I've watched Sky Wheatley's blog 0:12:39.240 --> 0:12:41.959 on birth, and yeah, it did make me think, wow, 0:12:42.240 --> 0:12:45.760 that looked even seeing the whole newborn stage and just 0:12:45.800 --> 0:12:48.920 how hellish it must be. I feel like, yeah, it 0:12:49.000 --> 0:12:51.240 really shows the reality of what it is to be 0:12:51.360 --> 0:12:53.839 a young mum, and it might be one that does 0:12:53.920 --> 0:12:56.200 put people off. Well, it was kind of It's kind 0:12:56.240 --> 0:12:58.360 of been this unspoken thing, isn't it. You know, you 0:12:58.440 --> 0:13:01.240 often you'll hear stories from different mums, but now it's 0:13:01.280 --> 0:13:04.560 so readily available online what it's actually like living with 0:13:04.640 --> 0:13:07.560 a newborn that I, as you said, I didn't know 0:13:07.679 --> 0:13:09.480 half that stuff. I didn't know that they woke up 0:13:09.480 --> 0:13:11.960 every three hours or whatever. The other good thing about 0:13:12.000 --> 0:13:13.800 it is the fact that a lot of women can 0:13:13.840 --> 0:13:15.480 then relate to it, Like I feel like if I 0:13:15.559 --> 0:13:17.559 was going through that stage, it'd make me feel better 0:13:17.600 --> 0:13:19.679 that I had someone to connect to. Yeah, I think 0:13:19.679 --> 0:13:21.880 there is a positive side to it when we're talking 0:13:21.880 --> 0:13:25.280 about the influencers that are sharing their real sort of mums, 0:13:25.280 --> 0:13:28.680 not these curated feeds. I think it's really good for 0:13:28.720 --> 0:13:32.040 people suffering from postnatal depression knowing that other people are 0:13:32.040 --> 0:13:34.800 struggling through it. And I also think it's a wake 0:13:34.880 --> 0:13:37.200 up call for maybe young people that want to have 0:13:37.320 --> 0:13:39.160 kids and then they watch it and they're like, oh, 0:13:39.360 --> 0:13:41.760 so that's really what it's like. I agree with you, Kate, 0:13:41.800 --> 0:13:44.280 because you look at Sky Wheatley, who shared some details 0:13:44.280 --> 0:13:47.280 about how she was struggling with parenthood, and then you 0:13:47.280 --> 0:13:50.280 look at her feed and it's this perfectly curated feed 0:13:50.360 --> 0:13:54.320 where Forest looks perfectly dressed and she's you know, back 0:13:54.360 --> 0:13:56.439 to a size six, and it didn't show any of 0:13:56.480 --> 0:13:58.560 the struggle on that feed. What can you put up 0:13:58.559 --> 0:14:01.760 that is this struggle? Maybe the kid covered in crap 0:14:01.840 --> 0:14:04.000 and food, maybe, but I don't know if it's gonna 0:14:04.040 --> 0:14:06.160 do it. I think the whole setting up photos of 0:14:06.240 --> 0:14:08.680 kids is a bit weird, you know, having an actual 0:14:08.720 --> 0:14:12.800 photo shoot with wearing clothes. I saw this so sorry, 0:14:12.800 --> 0:14:15.439 we're getting flashback us like setting up shoots with soaps. Dog. 0:14:15.800 --> 0:14:20.520 She's different. It reminds me of an acquaintance that I 0:14:20.600 --> 0:14:22.920 used to work with and she's recently had a child, 0:14:23.440 --> 0:14:25.520 and the first photo I saw of her with the 0:14:25.640 --> 0:14:30.160 child was this perfectly themed photo shoot with hair and makeup, 0:14:30.200 --> 0:14:32.080 and I just thought that her or the baby for 0:14:32.160 --> 0:14:34.560 her and the child. I suppose the baby had makeup 0:14:34.600 --> 0:14:36.600 on well I don't know, but she had a hell 0:14:36.680 --> 0:14:38.200 of a lot of hair and makeup done, and I 0:14:38.240 --> 0:14:40.960 just thought this is so unrealistic, like it just all 0:14:41.000 --> 0:14:43.840 seemed very staged. Well, that's the whole thing on Instagram. 0:14:43.840 --> 0:14:46.040 It is all stage, and people begin to think that 0:14:46.040 --> 0:14:48.720 that's real and that they're failing as a mother because 0:14:48.920 --> 0:14:52.320 they don't have the perfect oats for breakfast and all 0:14:52.360 --> 0:14:54.600 the weird stuff that kids would never ever eat. Do 0:14:54.640 --> 0:14:56.760 you know what, I've noticed a lot of their instamums. 0:14:56.800 --> 0:14:58.640 I don't know if it's just because I'm getting older, 0:14:58.640 --> 0:15:00.640 but they seem to be younger and young. I was 0:15:00.680 --> 0:15:03.960 talking about Chloe Zepp before, and I was shocked to 0:15:04.040 --> 0:15:07.160 learn that she's only twenty one. And it made me think, 0:15:07.280 --> 0:15:10.440 is it because she's grown up so young on social 0:15:10.480 --> 0:15:13.640 media that she's kind of done everything that now she's like, oh, Okay, 0:15:13.680 --> 0:15:16.360 well I'll have a kid. And I'm not inferring that 0:15:16.400 --> 0:15:19.440 she's having a child to profit off them on Instagram, 0:15:19.560 --> 0:15:21.480 not saying I think that it's different. I think she's 0:15:21.520 --> 0:15:24.840 got financial security so she can focus on having kids. Well. 0:15:24.880 --> 0:15:27.320 Also on Chloe Zepp, she's made the decision not to 0:15:27.400 --> 0:15:29.600 actually vlog her birth. I think she's still going to 0:15:29.640 --> 0:15:31.400 have cameras in there, but she's not actually going to 0:15:31.480 --> 0:15:33.600 talk to the camera while this is all going on. 0:15:33.920 --> 0:15:36.680 And it's strange because we're talking about parents profiteering off 0:15:36.720 --> 0:15:39.600 their children and the debate of whether you should film 0:15:39.640 --> 0:15:42.520 your child, will you're giving birth your child, et cetera. 0:15:42.760 --> 0:15:45.560 But I actually feel a bit robbed as a viewer 0:15:45.560 --> 0:15:48.600 of Chloezep's channel that I won't get to see that. Yeah, 0:15:48.600 --> 0:15:50.800 but they don't really share that much anyway. They're not 0:15:50.840 --> 0:15:53.640 really vlogging every week like when Sarah's day did it 0:15:53.680 --> 0:15:55.960 she was vlogging three times a week, so you felt 0:15:56.040 --> 0:15:58.320 like you were on that journey. I'm not surprised they've 0:15:58.320 --> 0:16:00.240 released a lot of stuff about the baby, but it's 0:16:00.240 --> 0:16:03.080 the whole psychology of you feel like you deserve to 0:16:03.200 --> 0:16:06.440 know as a follower because you've seen everything else. Yeah. 0:16:06.440 --> 0:16:08.840 It's funny because I remember when Sarah's day was close 0:16:08.920 --> 0:16:11.440 to giving birth and people every time she wasn't sharing 0:16:11.480 --> 0:16:13.960 on her Instagram stories, they just assumed that she'd gone 0:16:13.960 --> 0:16:16.240 into labor and she had to be like, no, I'm fine, 0:16:16.280 --> 0:16:19.560 I just am tired. I haven't shared anything for a while. Well, 0:16:19.600 --> 0:16:21.920 we'll have to wait with anticipations. I think Chloe's about 0:16:21.920 --> 0:16:24.040 to pop, So that's going to be the new instamum 0:16:24.040 --> 0:16:27.520 to follow. I reckon. Let's get into the reality TV 0:16:27.680 --> 0:16:30.640 rap of the week. So it seems like things are 0:16:30.640 --> 0:16:33.640 starting to change amy because I have been so bored 0:16:33.640 --> 0:16:35.720 with the reality TV on off it. Yes, I am 0:16:35.760 --> 0:16:38.160 watching Big Brother and I am watching Master Chef, but 0:16:38.200 --> 0:16:40.360 there is a hole in my heart for some Bachelor 0:16:40.440 --> 0:16:43.840 spinoff and we are finally getting it. Yeah. So the 0:16:43.920 --> 0:16:47.080 fifteenth of July, Bachelor in Paradise is set to drop, 0:16:47.400 --> 0:16:50.040 and I'm really excited to see how Kieran is going 0:16:50.120 --> 0:16:53.360 to be portrayed in this series, because he's already warning 0:16:53.360 --> 0:16:54.800 fans that he's going to come across as a bit 0:16:54.800 --> 0:16:56.720 of a dick. To be honest. Yeah, well we saw 0:16:56.800 --> 0:16:59.640 that Abby Chatfield was really interested in Kieran and it 0:16:59.680 --> 0:17:02.880 seems like things were mutual. But then he was seeing kissing. 0:17:02.920 --> 0:17:06.000 I think it's Tanil that's been on Bachelor and Paradise before. 0:17:06.040 --> 0:17:07.600 I think it was her. It was a girl with long, 0:17:07.680 --> 0:17:10.800 dark hair. And then there's some explosive blow up at 0:17:10.840 --> 0:17:13.879 a dinner party, sort of math style. So I can't 0:17:13.880 --> 0:17:16.919 wait because obviously he had such a good rap on 0:17:17.000 --> 0:17:19.359 Angie's series, but he seems like he could be a 0:17:19.400 --> 0:17:21.280 bit of a bad boy. Well, let's be honest, The 0:17:21.320 --> 0:17:24.159 Bachelor producers can sort of twist anything, can't they They 0:17:24.160 --> 0:17:26.159 could make they could have made Kieran look bad in 0:17:26.240 --> 0:17:28.640 Angie series. And it's funny the ones who were often 0:17:28.680 --> 0:17:31.920 portrayed badly in the Bachelor or Bachelorette and then they 0:17:31.960 --> 0:17:35.280 come into Paradise and everyone loves them. Yeah, I'm wondering 0:17:35.320 --> 0:17:38.000 if there's a deal done with the producers. So, for example, 0:17:38.000 --> 0:17:41.639 Abby Chatfield was relentlessly trolled unfairly, and it will be 0:17:41.680 --> 0:17:44.639 interesting to see her edit because she has a massed 0:17:44.640 --> 0:17:47.680 a huge following since being on The Bachelor. Well, she 0:17:48.119 --> 0:17:51.359 criticized her portrayal, didn't she, which was fairly so, because 0:17:51.440 --> 0:17:53.560 every time she was on, they played this sort of 0:17:53.600 --> 0:17:56.160 like sex boon music or as if she's some kind 0:17:56.200 --> 0:17:59.399 of like backstabbing snake in just ridiculous. It was just 0:17:59.480 --> 0:18:02.760 so horrible. So I'm really excited and hoping that she 0:18:02.840 --> 0:18:05.240 will get a good edit because she really deserves one, 0:18:05.280 --> 0:18:07.840 and I think this format of the show will suit 0:18:07.840 --> 0:18:10.320 her a lot more because it is about fun and dating. 0:18:10.359 --> 0:18:12.680 It's not so strict like The Bachelor. Well, the other 0:18:12.720 --> 0:18:14.959 thing that's really exciting is there's been ads for the 0:18:15.000 --> 0:18:18.360