1
00:00:00,160 --> 00:00:02,800
Speaker 1: Do you do a present reveal or does everybody just

2
00:00:02,920 --> 00:00:04,480
Speaker 1: open all of their presents at the same time.

3
00:00:04,720 --> 00:00:06,760
Speaker 2: Do you mean like it's Kylie's turn to open her gifts.

4
00:00:06,760 --> 00:00:08,440
Speaker 2: Everybody come and give Kylie her gift and then we

5
00:00:08,480 --> 00:00:10,160
Speaker 2: go to the next person and the next person.

6
00:00:10,240 --> 00:00:10,520
Speaker 1: Yeah.

7
00:00:10,600 --> 00:00:12,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, like if you've got a week in our family.

8
00:00:15,320 --> 00:00:18,919
Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families podcast. It's the podcast for the

9
00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:21,880
Speaker 1: time poor parent who just wants answers.

10
00:00:21,960 --> 00:00:25,360
Speaker 2: Now on the first day of Christmas, made true love,

11
00:00:25,640 --> 00:00:28,720
Speaker 2: I can't go that high cent to me a partridge

12
00:00:28,880 --> 00:00:31,080
Speaker 2: in a pear tree. Hello, this is doctor Justin Colson,

13
00:00:31,080 --> 00:00:33,479
Speaker 2: the author of six books about raising happy families, and

14
00:00:33,720 --> 00:00:37,120
Speaker 2: it is official the Christmas season. I'm here with missus

15
00:00:37,159 --> 00:00:40,720
Speaker 2: Happy Families, my wife Kylie, who has a smile that

16
00:00:40,920 --> 00:00:43,800
Speaker 2: would light up the biggest Christmas tree on the planet.

17
00:00:43,880 --> 00:00:46,440
Speaker 2: Right now, because this is your favorite season.

18
00:00:46,400 --> 00:00:49,520
Speaker 1: This is my favorite season. I can't I just can't

19
00:00:49,520 --> 00:00:50,680
Speaker 1: wait for Christmas to come around.

20
00:00:50,720 --> 00:00:51,040
Speaker 2: I love it.

21
00:00:51,040 --> 00:00:52,680
Speaker 1: I'm planning Christmas all year round.

22
00:00:52,960 --> 00:00:55,840
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, the tree is decorated. Well, we need to

23
00:00:55,840 --> 00:00:57,960
Speaker 2: talk about the tree, but we'll do that. We'll do

24
00:00:58,000 --> 00:00:59,480
Speaker 2: that later on in the week. I think on the

25
00:00:59,520 --> 00:01:01,880
Speaker 2: old tomorrow webisode. I've got a feeling. I don't want

26
00:01:01,920 --> 00:01:03,720
Speaker 2: to pre empt anything, but I've just got the feeling

27
00:01:03,720 --> 00:01:05,320
Speaker 2: that that's going to be part of our conversation.

28
00:01:05,840 --> 00:01:08,679
Speaker 1: I love the Christmas music, I love Christmas.

29
00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:10,720
Speaker 2: Food we've had. I've got a Christmas tree in my

30
00:01:10,760 --> 00:01:13,320
Speaker 2: office thanks to you. I mean it's only thirty centimeters high,

31
00:01:13,319 --> 00:01:14,959
Speaker 2: but I've got a Christmas tree in my office. You

32
00:01:15,040 --> 00:01:15,360
Speaker 2: love it.

33
00:01:15,600 --> 00:01:17,320
Speaker 1: I was a bit excited that you have an office

34
00:01:17,319 --> 00:01:18,400
Speaker 1: this year that I could decorate.

35
00:01:19,080 --> 00:01:24,000
Speaker 2: So we're talking about Christmas conundrums in the podcast today,

36
00:01:23,800 --> 00:01:26,360
Speaker 2: and we're going to do a really rapid fire Q

37
00:01:26,520 --> 00:01:26,720
Speaker 2: and A.

38
00:01:27,360 --> 00:01:28,640
Speaker 1: I don't know how this is going to work.

39
00:01:28,760 --> 00:01:29,080
Speaker 2: No, me.

40
00:01:29,480 --> 00:01:31,280
Speaker 1: We don't do rapid very well, do we.

41
00:01:31,360 --> 00:01:33,080
Speaker 2: But we're going to give it a go. So we

42
00:01:33,120 --> 00:01:35,480
Speaker 2: did a quick brainstorm. It took us about ninety seconds

43
00:01:35,480 --> 00:01:38,000
Speaker 2: to jot down a handful of Christmas conundrums that everybody

44
00:01:38,080 --> 00:01:40,199
Speaker 2: faces at this time of year as we get ready

45
00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:42,280
Speaker 2: for the silly season and everything that, you know, the

46
00:01:42,360 --> 00:01:45,040
Speaker 2: hustle and bustle, the drama, the stress, the worry rather

47
00:01:45,120 --> 00:01:50,080
Speaker 2: than the joy that Christmas sometimes cannotes. So five ideas

48
00:01:50,160 --> 00:01:52,360
Speaker 2: that need to be explored well.

49
00:01:52,240 --> 00:01:53,800
Speaker 1: I guess you know, when I think about the biggest

50
00:01:53,800 --> 00:01:59,000
Speaker 1: stresses around Christmas, outside of family and relationships in general.

51
00:01:58,760 --> 00:02:02,200
Speaker 2: Which are the biggest stress it can be.

52
00:02:02,480 --> 00:02:05,800
Speaker 1: I think gift giving would be definitely number two on

53
00:02:05,840 --> 00:02:06,240
Speaker 1: the list.

54
00:02:06,520 --> 00:02:08,799
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, So Christmas is meant to be this time

55
00:02:08,840 --> 00:02:10,640
Speaker 2: of joy, but it can be really stressful. So we're

56
00:02:10,639 --> 00:02:13,440
Speaker 2: going to talk about these Christmas conundrums. You start us off,

57
00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:15,639
Speaker 2: You've got the list, So let's go through these five

58
00:02:16,320 --> 00:02:18,440
Speaker 2: Christmas crisis points.

59
00:02:18,639 --> 00:02:23,560
Speaker 1: Okay, top of the list. How many gifts is enough?

60
00:02:23,680 --> 00:02:27,120
Speaker 2: Oh my goodness. Okay, So I've fallen in love with

61
00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:30,760
Speaker 2: the idea of the whole, you know, by four gifts

62
00:02:30,760 --> 00:02:34,440
Speaker 2: for the kids, something they want and something they need,

63
00:02:34,480 --> 00:02:35,800
Speaker 2: something to wear, and something to read. I think I

64
00:02:35,800 --> 00:02:38,720
Speaker 2: said that all around the wrong way, but I really

65
00:02:38,720 --> 00:02:39,760
Speaker 2: really like that idea.

66
00:02:40,240 --> 00:02:43,040
Speaker 1: I do too, and it has really simplified things for

67
00:02:43,160 --> 00:02:46,160
Speaker 1: us at Christmas time with six kids, trying to kind

68
00:02:46,160 --> 00:02:49,560
Speaker 1: of work out who gets what and you know, make

69
00:02:49,560 --> 00:02:52,639
Speaker 1: sure that everybody feels like they're receiving an equal amount

70
00:02:53,040 --> 00:02:54,400
Speaker 1: has been really, really tricky.

71
00:02:54,440 --> 00:02:57,400
Speaker 2: So I've loved that, Yeah, because that way everybody kind

72
00:02:57,400 --> 00:02:59,960
Speaker 2: of gets a pretty equal share, and you can do

73
00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:02,400
Speaker 2: pretty cost effectively. I mean, the reality is we go

74
00:03:02,520 --> 00:03:04,280
Speaker 2: to and this is not sponsored, but we go to

75
00:03:04,320 --> 00:03:06,400
Speaker 2: somewhere like Big w and buy clothes for the kids

76
00:03:06,440 --> 00:03:09,160
Speaker 2: because they grow out of them in two minutes. So

77
00:03:09,200 --> 00:03:11,120
Speaker 2: it's not like we're going and spending a fortune on clothes.

78
00:03:11,160 --> 00:03:13,280
Speaker 2: But we drop down to the shops and grab them

79
00:03:13,280 --> 00:03:15,959
Speaker 2: an outfit or two or three or four because it's

80
00:03:16,280 --> 00:03:19,239
Speaker 2: you know, it's it's affordable. We get them a book

81
00:03:19,560 --> 00:03:22,280
Speaker 2: or two from a bookstore. By the time you've done that,

82
00:03:22,760 --> 00:03:24,760
Speaker 2: you still haven't really spent that much money. Then you

83
00:03:24,760 --> 00:03:26,400
Speaker 2: buy them something that they need, you know, one of

84
00:03:26,400 --> 00:03:28,680
Speaker 2: those essential kinds of items. You can do that pretty

85
00:03:28,720 --> 00:03:30,960
Speaker 2: cheap as well. And then something they want. I guess

86
00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:34,320
Speaker 2: that's where the extravagant fund comes in, and you're only

87
00:03:34,320 --> 00:03:37,320
Speaker 2: limited by your imagination and your budget. But to me,

88
00:03:37,520 --> 00:03:41,680
Speaker 2: that's about right for the kids, and there's there's plenty

89
00:03:41,760 --> 00:03:44,000
Speaker 2: of joy with those, okay.

90
00:03:44,080 --> 00:03:47,720
Speaker 1: Next one, is it okay to give essentials.

91
00:03:47,720 --> 00:03:51,080
Speaker 2: According to the something they want and something they need? Line.

92
00:03:51,120 --> 00:03:53,600
Speaker 2: I think that it's just fine to give essential.

93
00:03:53,280 --> 00:03:55,880
Speaker 1: See I don't think need necessarily is an essential.

94
00:03:55,960 --> 00:03:58,280
Speaker 2: Okay, So what's an essential essentials like.

95
00:03:58,280 --> 00:04:02,280
Speaker 1: A toothbrush or Undies or maybe deodorant.

96
00:04:02,640 --> 00:04:04,160
Speaker 2: Well, as soon as you said that, I have to

97
00:04:04,280 --> 00:04:06,440
Speaker 2: I have to say the idea of opening up some

98
00:04:06,480 --> 00:04:09,240
Speaker 2: deodorant and some Undies or a tooth brice and saying,

99
00:04:09,320 --> 00:04:11,720
Speaker 2: oh wow, thanks so much for being so thoughtful that

100
00:04:11,720 --> 00:04:14,600
Speaker 2: that doesn't really excite me. I don't know. I mean,

101
00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:19,320
Speaker 2: I know that if you're doing it genuinely tough, then

102
00:04:19,400 --> 00:04:22,279
Speaker 2: that probably is a really neat thing for Christmas. But

103
00:04:22,400 --> 00:04:26,240
Speaker 2: from what I've seen with Middle Australia, I think that

104
00:04:26,279 --> 00:04:28,680
Speaker 2: we've kind of moved beyond. That's that to me sort

105
00:04:28,680 --> 00:04:31,680
Speaker 2: of you know, sits with those nineteen twenties, nineteen thirties,

106
00:04:31,720 --> 00:04:34,880
Speaker 2: nine and forties old school stories of Christmas, and I

107
00:04:34,920 --> 00:04:38,279
Speaker 2: reckon most people nowadays would probably think that was really

108
00:04:39,240 --> 00:04:43,240
Speaker 2: uninspiring to give essentials. You're looking at me like you disagree.

109
00:04:43,320 --> 00:04:45,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, I do disagree completely.

110
00:04:45,080 --> 00:04:47,360
Speaker 2: I think do we give essentials to our kids like

111
00:04:47,400 --> 00:04:49,160
Speaker 2: in their Christmas? So? We sure do we do?

112
00:04:49,440 --> 00:04:51,920
Speaker 1: And as the children get older, you know, their hair

113
00:04:51,960 --> 00:04:54,680
Speaker 1: product that's like twenty dollars a bottle. It's not something

114
00:04:54,760 --> 00:04:57,520
Speaker 1: that I would buy them normally, but come Christmas time

115
00:04:57,600 --> 00:05:01,080
Speaker 1: I might actually get them their special you know, colored

116
00:05:01,120 --> 00:05:03,120
Speaker 1: hair or whatever.

117
00:05:03,279 --> 00:05:05,560
Speaker 2: But see, I look at the essentials that you're talking

118
00:05:05,560 --> 00:05:08,200
Speaker 2: about here, because you do these amazing Christmas stockings and

119
00:05:08,240 --> 00:05:09,800
Speaker 2: you put a lot of essentials in there. So there's

120
00:05:09,800 --> 00:05:12,719
Speaker 2: always some ginger beer, the Bunderberg ginger beer and a

121
00:05:12,800 --> 00:05:16,640
Speaker 2: mango in every Christmas. That's my essential. Seriously, that's what

122
00:05:16,720 --> 00:05:19,360
Speaker 2: the kids have for breakfast, a ginger beer and a

123
00:05:19,400 --> 00:05:23,679
Speaker 2: mango and then they start eating chocolate. But the essentials

124
00:05:23,680 --> 00:05:26,520
Speaker 2: that you're talking about, like those ridiculously expensive hair products

125
00:05:26,640 --> 00:05:28,880
Speaker 2: or you know that the fancy hair tiders and all

126
00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:29,720
Speaker 2: that sort of stuff, well.

127
00:05:29,640 --> 00:05:31,800
Speaker 1: Shower Gael for instance. You know, like they've got their

128
00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:33,840
Speaker 1: beautiful smelly stuff that they like to get from the

129
00:05:33,839 --> 00:05:35,880
Speaker 1: body shop. Well I don't buy that through the year.

130
00:05:36,320 --> 00:05:39,040
Speaker 1: They just get the big w stuff or you know what.

131
00:05:39,080 --> 00:05:41,800
Speaker 2: The wooly stuff. Yeah, but I reckon that that's not

132
00:05:41,839 --> 00:05:44,040
Speaker 2: an essential. I think that's a that's a gift, that's

133
00:05:44,080 --> 00:05:47,400
Speaker 2: a luxury item. So you've taken it up a notch

134
00:05:47,520 --> 00:05:50,080
Speaker 2: or two. If you're going to talk about a bottle

135
00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:52,599
Speaker 2: of rex owner from down at local walls, or you know,

136
00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:57,000
Speaker 2: a bottle of Brute for the men, I don't reckon.

137
00:05:57,279 --> 00:05:59,760
Speaker 2: I think they're essentials, and that's that's uninspiring. And I

138
00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:02,919
Speaker 2: don't think that essentials should be given, but fancy essentials,

139
00:06:03,560 --> 00:06:04,760
Speaker 2: I'm all in, Like if you and.

140
00:06:04,720 --> 00:06:06,520
Speaker 1: God, my six year old gets very excited when she

141
00:06:06,520 --> 00:06:09,320
Speaker 1: gets a Barbie toothbrush because generally speaking, she just gets

142
00:06:09,360 --> 00:06:12,039
Speaker 1: the ten pack from Woolli's.

143
00:06:11,760 --> 00:06:15,920
Speaker 2: Okay, so I reckon. Then the Christmas conundrum around this is,

144
00:06:16,600 --> 00:06:18,360
Speaker 2: if you're going to do essentials, make them a bit

145
00:06:18,400 --> 00:06:20,440
Speaker 2: fancy one way or the other. They don't have to

146
00:06:20,440 --> 00:06:22,240
Speaker 2: be costly, they just have to be fancy and out

147
00:06:22,240 --> 00:06:23,479
Speaker 2: of the ordinary. Is that fair?

148
00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:24,360
Speaker 1: That's fair?

149
00:06:24,480 --> 00:06:27,240
Speaker 2: Cool? Okay, we've got another couple to do. Let's take

150
00:06:27,240 --> 00:06:29,480
Speaker 2: a quick break and come back and respond to them

151
00:06:29,480 --> 00:06:30,680
Speaker 2: in a second. What are they real?

152
00:06:30,760 --> 00:06:32,400
Speaker 1: Quick? I'm not telling you.

153
00:06:32,839 --> 00:06:35,880
Speaker 2: Let's fight out of a second. It's the Happy Families Podcast.

154
00:06:36,400 --> 00:06:39,680
Speaker 3: Imagine a home where discipline got results without anyone having

155
00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:42,080
Speaker 3: to feel bad or in trouble. The do's and don'ts

156
00:06:42,080 --> 00:06:44,720
Speaker 3: of Discipline as a webinar to help parents set limits

157
00:06:44,760 --> 00:06:48,400
Speaker 3: with love, compassion and humanity. Find it now at happy

158
00:06:48,440 --> 00:06:51,000
Speaker 3: families dot com dot au slash shop.

159
00:06:51,279 --> 00:06:53,520
Speaker 2: It's the Happy Families Podcast. The podcast or the type

160
00:06:53,520 --> 00:06:56,080
Speaker 2: of parent who just find SeNSS Now, we are responding

161
00:06:56,080 --> 00:06:58,679
Speaker 2: to your Christmas conundrums. What do we do about getting

162
00:06:58,680 --> 00:07:01,920
Speaker 2: our gift giving right? So far, we've identified that essential

163
00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:03,880
Speaker 2: items are okay, but they need to be a little

164
00:07:03,880 --> 00:07:06,520
Speaker 2: bit fancy. And we've also recognized that we don't want

165
00:07:06,520 --> 00:07:09,040
Speaker 2: to give too many gifts. But probably those four something

166
00:07:09,920 --> 00:07:11,880
Speaker 2: to wear, something to read, something they want, something they

167
00:07:11,920 --> 00:07:16,280
Speaker 2: need is probably a really nice number of gifts with

168
00:07:16,640 --> 00:07:17,560
Speaker 2: a really good balance.

169
00:07:17,760 --> 00:07:21,320
Speaker 1: All right, next question, gift cards versus gifts.

170
00:07:21,800 --> 00:07:23,280
Speaker 2: I can talk to you about research on this, but

171
00:07:23,320 --> 00:07:24,400
Speaker 2: before I do, what do you reckon?

172
00:07:24,760 --> 00:07:25,880
Speaker 1: I'm gifts all the way?

173
00:07:26,040 --> 00:07:28,040
Speaker 2: Yeah you are. You're a gift You're a gift giver.

174
00:07:28,280 --> 00:07:32,040
Speaker 1: Yeah. The problem is I believe I'm a really thoughtful

175
00:07:32,120 --> 00:07:33,080
Speaker 1: gift giver, and.

176
00:07:33,560 --> 00:07:36,160
Speaker 2: I would agree with that you are extraordinarily thoughtful.

177
00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:39,520
Speaker 1: I shop throughout the year, and have you know when

178
00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:41,280
Speaker 1: I go into a shop, I see something that just

179
00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:43,400
Speaker 1: jumps out at me as being, you know, something without

180
00:07:43,400 --> 00:07:45,080
Speaker 1: one of the children will like, and I'll get it

181
00:07:45,120 --> 00:07:48,400
Speaker 1: at that point because it's on special, it's on special,

182
00:07:48,560 --> 00:07:50,440
Speaker 1: or because I've thought of them in that moment and

183
00:07:50,760 --> 00:07:52,640
Speaker 1: it was you know something that really jumped out at me.

184
00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:55,080
Speaker 1: I hate getting a gift when I feel like it's

185
00:07:55,120 --> 00:07:56,240
Speaker 1: just come out of someone's.

186
00:07:55,960 --> 00:07:57,680
Speaker 2: Gift cupver it regifting.

187
00:07:57,840 --> 00:08:01,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, that really kind of heaves me off. But I

188
00:08:01,120 --> 00:08:04,400
Speaker 1: would always, always, always love to get a gift that's

189
00:08:04,480 --> 00:08:07,320
Speaker 1: been personally picked for me, as opposed to giving me

190
00:08:07,360 --> 00:08:07,880
Speaker 1: a gift card.

191
00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:10,560
Speaker 2: Okay, so the research says really clearly that if you

192
00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:12,760
Speaker 2: can buy a thoughtful gift and you know the person well,

193
00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:16,120
Speaker 2: a thoughtful gift will always always be better. But if

194
00:08:16,160 --> 00:08:18,360
Speaker 2: you don't know them well, you don't know what to

195
00:08:18,400 --> 00:08:21,960
Speaker 2: get them, and you just either regifting a gift or

196
00:08:22,040 --> 00:08:24,520
Speaker 2: just giving something that you think they might hopefully perhaps maybe,

197
00:08:24,600 --> 00:08:27,720
Speaker 2: like the research seems to show that gift cards are

198
00:08:27,760 --> 00:08:29,680
Speaker 2: a much better way to go. You can say, hey,

199
00:08:29,720 --> 00:08:31,160
Speaker 2: you know what you mean a lot to me. I

200
00:08:31,160 --> 00:08:33,560
Speaker 2: think you're a great person, but I just don't know you.

201
00:08:33,720 --> 00:08:35,000
Speaker 2: I mean not that you'd say this in the card,

202
00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:36,360
Speaker 2: but I don't really know you well enough to get

203
00:08:36,360 --> 00:08:39,160
Speaker 2: you something really personal. So I gave you this gift

204
00:08:39,240 --> 00:08:41,760
Speaker 2: card because I figured that way you can go splodge.

205
00:08:41,880 --> 00:08:44,400
Speaker 2: The other great thing about gift cards at Christmas is

206
00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:47,480
Speaker 2: that when you give a gift card. That person can

207
00:08:47,520 --> 00:08:50,760
Speaker 2: go to the boxing day sales and get twice the

208
00:08:50,760 --> 00:08:52,680
Speaker 2: amount of stuff that they would have got the week

209
00:08:52,720 --> 00:08:55,560
Speaker 2: before Christmas because everything's on sale. So there are some

210
00:08:55,640 --> 00:08:56,840
Speaker 2: advantages to gift cards.

211
00:08:57,240 --> 00:09:00,000
Speaker 1: Okay, next question, yep, buying for the extended family.

212
00:09:00,320 --> 00:09:04,120
Speaker 2: Oh I hate this one. Okay, some context. I come

213
00:09:04,160 --> 00:09:06,600
Speaker 2: from a very big family. You come from an average

214
00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:09,600
Speaker 2: sized family, But across the two families, there's like fifty

215
00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:12,760
Speaker 2: fifty odd people, maybe sixty people in the extended family,

216
00:09:13,559 --> 00:09:16,360
Speaker 2: and we all just kind of got over it at

217
00:09:16,360 --> 00:09:19,240
Speaker 2: some point, didn't we. I just think it depends on

218
00:09:20,040 --> 00:09:22,280
Speaker 2: it depends on how old everybody is, and it depends

219
00:09:22,280 --> 00:09:23,920
Speaker 2: on how big the family is, and it also depends

220
00:09:23,920 --> 00:09:26,760
Speaker 2: on how close you all are. So I just think

221
00:09:26,760 --> 00:09:30,080
Speaker 2: the answer is it depends. What do you think it depends? Depends?

222
00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:32,640
Speaker 2: That's my answer. No, I'm not sitting on the fence.

223
00:09:32,640 --> 00:09:34,840
Speaker 2: It's like, well, if you all live in one like

224
00:09:34,920 --> 00:09:37,840
Speaker 2: let's just say you all live in the same suburb

225
00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:39,360
Speaker 2: and you get to catch up regularly and you know

226
00:09:39,440 --> 00:09:43,800
Speaker 2: each other well, and everybody is engaged with one another

227
00:09:43,840 --> 00:09:46,840
Speaker 2: in really positive ways, then yeah, buy gifts for everybody.

228
00:09:47,360 --> 00:09:49,120
Speaker 2: And also it depends on your budget. I mean, can

229
00:09:49,120 --> 00:09:50,760
Speaker 2: you imagine if we actually had to buy gifts for

230
00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:55,000
Speaker 2: every single person in our extended family that were meaningful

231
00:09:55,120 --> 00:09:57,880
Speaker 2: and substantial, like we would be saving up for three

232
00:09:57,960 --> 00:09:59,600
Speaker 2: years every year.

233
00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:02,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think I think that. I think that it

234
00:10:02,160 --> 00:10:04,600
Speaker 1: does depend. I think that as soon as there's an

235
00:10:04,640 --> 00:10:10,160
Speaker 1: expectation take the whole joy out of the process. But

236
00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:14,240
Speaker 1: I also feel like it just feels really nice to

237
00:10:14,240 --> 00:10:14,720
Speaker 1: be thought of.

238
00:10:15,280 --> 00:10:17,400
Speaker 2: It does, but you've also got to have the resources,

239
00:10:17,480 --> 00:10:19,440
Speaker 2: you know, Like I said, if we were to try

240
00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:22,600
Speaker 2: to spend proper money or give really thoughtful gifts to

241
00:10:22,760 --> 00:10:26,240
Speaker 2: every single person in the extended family, Number one, you'd

242
00:10:26,280 --> 00:10:29,320
Speaker 2: never you'd need a gift room in your house to

243
00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:33,680
Speaker 2: store it all. I just I don't think that it's practical. Okay,

244
00:10:33,760 --> 00:10:34,360
Speaker 2: So I've got.

245
00:10:34,200 --> 00:10:37,040
Speaker 1: A bit of an extension to that, and I think

246
00:10:37,080 --> 00:10:39,800
Speaker 1: that something that would be really nice to just acknowledge

247
00:10:39,800 --> 00:10:42,120
Speaker 1: people is, you know, a really thoughtful card where you

248
00:10:42,160 --> 00:10:43,640
Speaker 1: can actually yep.

249
00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:45,800
Speaker 2: I think that's a great idea, especially and it saves

250
00:10:45,800 --> 00:10:46,360
Speaker 2: money as well.

251
00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:51,080
Speaker 1: All right, last question, do you do a present reveal

252
00:10:51,200 --> 00:10:53,400
Speaker 1: or does everybody just open all of their presents at

253
00:10:53,440 --> 00:10:54,000
Speaker 1: the same time?

254
00:10:54,440 --> 00:10:57,280
Speaker 2: Do you mean like, Okay, it's Kylie's turn to open

255
00:10:57,320 --> 00:10:59,160
Speaker 2: her gifts. Everybody come and give Kylie her gift, and

256
00:10:59,160 --> 00:11:01,880
Speaker 2: then we go to the next and then the next person. Yeah, like,

257
00:11:01,920 --> 00:11:05,240
Speaker 2: if you've got a week in our family, how long

258
00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:08,160
Speaker 2: is it going to take? It's oh my goodness. And

259
00:11:08,200 --> 00:11:10,600
Speaker 2: the kids go crazy. It's so boring. They're like, could

260
00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:12,800
Speaker 2: I do what I do now? And then this is

261
00:11:12,840 --> 00:11:15,400
Speaker 2: something that we agonize over. Our solution in our family

262
00:11:15,480 --> 00:11:17,800
Speaker 2: has been that we break up the gift giving throughout

263
00:11:17,800 --> 00:11:19,560
Speaker 2: the day and that different people get to have that

264
00:11:19,640 --> 00:11:22,360
Speaker 2: experience at different times with everyone.

265
00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:24,560
Speaker 1: But so I think the reason that we started this

266
00:11:24,760 --> 00:11:28,480
Speaker 1: was because what we found was was just this massive

267
00:11:28,640 --> 00:11:32,600
Speaker 1: presence and number one, as a parent, trying to oversee

268
00:11:32,800 --> 00:11:36,000
Speaker 1: six children opening up all of their presents from aunties

269
00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:39,600
Speaker 1: and uncles to be able to then give thanks for

270
00:11:39,679 --> 00:11:43,040
Speaker 1: those presents was just like was mind boggling. And our

271
00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:44,720
Speaker 1: children got to a point where it was just like

272
00:11:44,880 --> 00:11:47,200
Speaker 1: literally ripping the paper open so they could see what

273
00:11:47,280 --> 00:11:49,240
Speaker 1: was inside and then grabbing the next present.

274
00:11:49,440 --> 00:11:52,240
Speaker 2: So some more context around this. I'm one of six

275
00:11:53,120 --> 00:11:55,960
Speaker 2: and we've got six and one of my sisters also

276
00:11:56,040 --> 00:11:59,320
Speaker 2: has six, plus there's some others as well. So we

277
00:11:59,360 --> 00:12:01,560
Speaker 2: would go to mum and Dad's house and there would

278
00:12:01,559 --> 00:12:04,480
Speaker 2: be at least forty people all trying to open gifts

279
00:12:04,520 --> 00:12:07,400
Speaker 2: at the same time, and it was just mayhem. There

280
00:12:07,400 --> 00:12:09,840
Speaker 2: was paper going everywhere. And my mom can't just give

281
00:12:09,880 --> 00:12:12,480
Speaker 2: one gift either. Mum usually gives people a like a

282
00:12:12,520 --> 00:12:15,320
Speaker 2: sack of gifts, and some of them are only like

283
00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:17,320
Speaker 2: one dollar gifts, some of them a just ridiculous gifts.

284
00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:18,400
Speaker 2: Sorry about part of that's.

285
00:12:18,240 --> 00:12:23,560
Speaker 1: Because she has to wrap every single thing separately, and

286
00:12:23,600 --> 00:12:26,000
Speaker 1: so what ends up happening is that each child gets about.

287
00:12:25,840 --> 00:12:29,000
Speaker 2: Ten gifts from my mum because she's this over the

288
00:12:29,040 --> 00:12:31,800
Speaker 2: top gift giver, and all of a sudden, you've got

289
00:12:31,840 --> 00:12:34,400
Speaker 2: forty people trying to unwrap ten gifts each. I mean,

290
00:12:34,400 --> 00:12:36,160
Speaker 2: it's obviously not that bad, but it feels like there's

291
00:12:36,160 --> 00:12:39,000
Speaker 2: four hundred gifts going crazy in the living room, and

292
00:12:39,040 --> 00:12:41,760
Speaker 2: so I just reckon that you do what works for

293
00:12:41,800 --> 00:12:44,360
Speaker 2: your family. But my goodness, if you're trying to if

294
00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:46,360
Speaker 2: you're trying to do that much, it's probably a bit

295
00:12:46,440 --> 00:12:48,920
Speaker 2: much and it might be time to take stock and

296
00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:49,920
Speaker 2: find a new solution.

297
00:12:50,360 --> 00:12:52,480
Speaker 1: So I think our kids have really enjoyed that process

298
00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:56,160
Speaker 1: of opening presents and watching their siblings open their presence. Yeah,

299
00:12:56,280 --> 00:12:58,320
Speaker 1: it's one challenge we have is that we've got one

300
00:12:58,400 --> 00:13:00,880
Speaker 1: child who actually doesn't enjoy it. And the reason she

301
00:13:00,920 --> 00:13:03,360
Speaker 1: doesn't enjoy it is because she feels so much pressure

302
00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:08,000
Speaker 1: to kind of, you know, show appreciation and joy for

303
00:13:08,080 --> 00:13:10,920
Speaker 1: something that she might not actually be appreciative of.

304
00:13:11,240 --> 00:13:13,920
Speaker 2: Is it okay how thankful you are for a gift?

305
00:13:14,320 --> 00:13:16,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, So it definitely is something to think about.

306
00:13:17,120 --> 00:13:19,000
Speaker 2: So we talked about this in the webinar last night

307
00:13:19,080 --> 00:13:21,120
Speaker 2: as well, and it's probably worth just highlighting it again.

308
00:13:21,520 --> 00:13:24,959
Speaker 2: The idea that we've got to remember what the purpose

309
00:13:24,960 --> 00:13:30,199
Speaker 2: of Christmas is and the gifts are. The gifts should

310
00:13:30,240 --> 00:13:32,320
Speaker 2: not be the primary reason that we're getting together. It

311
00:13:32,320 --> 00:13:34,880
Speaker 2: should be about family and relationships and actually making a

312
00:13:34,920 --> 00:13:36,240
Speaker 2: difference in people's lives.

313
00:13:36,600 --> 00:13:41,319
Speaker 1: Well, I think we've touched on some pretty pretty intense

314
00:13:42,080 --> 00:13:43,120
Speaker 1: conversations here.

315
00:13:43,520 --> 00:13:45,960
Speaker 2: Good luck making sense of it all. If you have

316
00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:48,120
Speaker 2: any feedback for us and tell us what you do

317
00:13:48,280 --> 00:13:51,800
Speaker 2: to deal with those Christmas conundrums, you can email us

318
00:13:51,880 --> 00:13:55,800
Speaker 2: podcasts at Happy Families dot com dot au. We really

319
00:13:55,840 --> 00:13:57,840
Speaker 2: appreciate you listening to the podcast. If you enjoy it.

320
00:13:57,880 --> 00:14:00,400
Speaker 2: We would beg of you. We love it when you

321
00:14:00,480 --> 00:14:04,000
Speaker 2: jump onto back. Please don't please, please please jump onto

322
00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:06,280
Speaker 2: Apple Podcasts. It would make It would be the best

323
00:14:06,320 --> 00:14:09,360
Speaker 2: Christmas present ever if you could jump onto Apple Podcasts

324
00:14:09,360 --> 00:14:11,400
Speaker 2: and leave us a rating and review. We love five

325
00:14:11,440 --> 00:14:14,440
Speaker 2: star ratings. We love reviews that tell people why you

326
00:14:14,600 --> 00:14:17,240
Speaker 2: love the podcast. So please, as a happy Christmas present

327
00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:20,600
Speaker 2: to us, I'm begging jump onto Apple Podcasts and do that.

328
00:14:21,080 --> 00:14:23,240
Speaker 2: We are so grateful by the way too. Justin Roland

329
00:14:23,280 --> 00:14:25,760
Speaker 2: from Bridge Media for producing the podcast, and our executive

330
00:14:25,760 --> 00:14:28,600
Speaker 2: producer is Craig Bruce. If you'd like more information about

331
00:14:28,640 --> 00:14:30,680
Speaker 2: how to make your family flourish and how to get

332
00:14:30,680 --> 00:14:32,640
Speaker 2: those webinars that we do every month as part of

333
00:14:32,680 --> 00:14:34,880
Speaker 2: your Happy Family's membership for less than half the price

334
00:14:34,920 --> 00:14:37,520
Speaker 2: of the webinars, because you remember, just got a Happy

335
00:14:37,560 --> 00:14:39,360
Speaker 2: Families dot com dot au