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Speaker 1: Ma'm always always said be careful love those.

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Speaker 2: Alum boys.

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Speaker 3: Little well, use your head.

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Speaker 1: They will tear you off like a paper too. Oh

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Speaker 1: no no no, yeah yeah yeah yeah, oh no no no,

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Speaker 1: then the smallach you darling. Anyway, it's a lethal thoughts

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Speaker 1: that'll bring you down, shouting.

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Speaker 3: To get your tipsy like God drinks love drunk girl.

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Speaker 2: Hello, Hello, everybody, Welcome to It's layered. We're bizzak, I'm

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Speaker 2: Rumbie and I'm Amanda. Yeah. We're so stoked to be

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Speaker 2: here today. We've got some special gifts in the house,

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Speaker 2: Zimbabwe's finest, two guys who have made Zimbabwe a lave

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Speaker 2: for many many years. They have been in this podcasting

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Speaker 2: game for a hot minute. So stoked to have the

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Speaker 2: guys of Two Broke twmbos with us. We've got Dan

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Speaker 2: and Phil over here. They are just creators in their

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Speaker 2: own ride, not only with their podcast, digital creators. We've

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Speaker 2: got a radio host MC music aficionado. I don't know,

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Speaker 2: I could go on and on. They're just doing the

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Speaker 2: things representing Zimbabwe loud and proud and we're happy that

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Speaker 2: they could join us to talk a little bit over here.

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Speaker 2: And it's layered good well, it's morning for me. Good morning, guys.

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Speaker 2: How are you doing?

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Speaker 3: Yes, thank you, thank you, thank you. Before we continue,

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Speaker 3: I think we've got to do the mandatory check. Do

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Speaker 3: you mind just giving us our full intros?

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Speaker 2: So we just know if we know you guys, like

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Speaker 2: if we know know you guys?

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Speaker 4: Okay, we we were told that. Oh yeah, we listened

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Speaker 4: to your podcast and stuff.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, okay, So do you have questions you asked

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Speaker 2: or we just go roll into what we know what

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Speaker 2: we be known about you, Broke Twmbles.

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Speaker 3: We want full intros as per the podcast. We every

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Speaker 3: episode we introduced ourselves, we would like you.

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Speaker 2: I have failed. I'm going to admit I have failed

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Speaker 2: on the spot, on the spot, I have failed, Amanda.

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Speaker 2: Do you know I have failed dismally.

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Speaker 5: I don't want to attempt and fail.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, very shy. Maybe we can ask you to

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Speaker 2: do the intro for us. It's layered X two Broke Trembles,

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Speaker 2: so we'll give you the platform.

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Speaker 4: Gentlemen, you know it's it's like people just lie, unprovoked,

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Speaker 4: you know, unprovoked.

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Speaker 3: Particular women, they target you and they say.

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Speaker 4: Lies, spewing, spewing.

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Speaker 3: You know, I've been noticing you for quite a while,

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Speaker 3: and I love how you move. You know, a big

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Speaker 3: fan of.

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Speaker 4: Our secrets exactly, you guys have a meeting where you

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Speaker 4: come up with these lives.

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Speaker 2: How much we know, we know what we know. We

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Speaker 2: just want to know if you know what we know,

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Speaker 2: that's the thing.

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Speaker 4: So Philip, Philip, also, just to let you guys know,

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Speaker 4: for some reason, in the past few months, we've been

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Speaker 4: interviewed in a couple of podcasts and we keep making

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Speaker 4: the mistake of taking it over. So phil if you

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Speaker 4: can just suppress and allow yourself to be the guest,

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Speaker 4: not the host, just you know, just yeah.

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Speaker 5: Okay, very targeted.

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Speaker 2: I'm sorry. So I feel your pain. I feel your pain.

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Speaker 2: We still love you, though, and we're glad you're here.

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Speaker 5: Well to show you, we've been listening.

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Speaker 6: We've been listening to a lot of the mental health

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Speaker 6: segments because yeah, it's something that obviously we were like, wow,

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Speaker 6: like to even talk about this topic, to even like

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Speaker 6: not only as one episode, but actually do lots have

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Speaker 6: lots of different guests on and it's just been really

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Speaker 6: really enlightening. So we are listening, and that's something that

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Speaker 6: we would love to delve deeper on with you. Guys

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Speaker 6: today because like, what does mental health even mean? Like

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Speaker 6: what do you guys think it even means?

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Speaker 3: You'd like to answer, Well, I think now that the

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Speaker 3: common nomber inclature is mental wellness. Want the more places.

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Speaker 3: But it's just that it's just understanding that we live

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Speaker 3: in a very difficult and traumatic country. We've been through

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Speaker 3: a lot, We're continued to go through a lot culturally.

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Speaker 3: This isn't something that is spoken about or acknowledged, and

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Speaker 3: we're just trying to do our bit to help because

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Speaker 3: I personally was in a bad place and I needed

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Speaker 3: mental help and if I didn't have access to the

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Speaker 3: resources that I did, I probably wouldn't be here today.

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Speaker 3: So that's, in short, that's what it is. It's just

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Speaker 3: trying to you know, e spread with positivity to help

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Speaker 3: the people that need to be helped and to be

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Speaker 3: the change that we want to see in the world.

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Speaker 5: Have you attached to that? Sorry?

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Speaker 6: Sorry, I'm totally go ahead. I was just going to

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Speaker 6: say to Phil, as you've seen any stigma and sharing

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Speaker 6: a story.

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Speaker 3: Uh So I was actually thinking about it because yeah,

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Speaker 3: you guys did like send a few like notes about

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Speaker 3: the question you'd like to ask. I think there has,

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Speaker 3: but I'm also very privileged in a few ways, mainly

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Speaker 3: one being I'm a sociopath and two being that I've

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Speaker 3: always been good at not caring what other people think

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Speaker 3: a certain degree, So even if there is a stigma

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Speaker 3: around it, it's been very difficult for me to let

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Speaker 3: that affect me taking care of myself, if that makes sense. Like,

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Speaker 3: once I realized that I have a problem I need

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Speaker 3: to fix this, I never really worried, wait, what will

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Speaker 3: people think, because my focus was helping myself first, you

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Speaker 3: know what I mean. And the reason why we started

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Speaker 3: the segment of the podcast is because when we took

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Speaker 3: our break and I came back, we were very honest

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Speaker 3: with the audience. Well, I was very honest with the

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Speaker 3: audience that I was dealing with mental health issues and

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Speaker 3: this is what I had to address for us to

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Speaker 3: get to a place where we can start recording again.

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Speaker 3: And then started resonating with listeners, and then Dan I realized,

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Speaker 3: wait a minute, if if this part of the conversation

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Speaker 3: is resonating, let's figure out how we can double down

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Speaker 3: on that, because ultimately the whole point of having a

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Speaker 3: podcast is to give the listeners what they want. So

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Speaker 3: even within that. Yeah, I would say there's a stigma,

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Speaker 3: but I'm not gonna I genuinely can't sit here and say,

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Speaker 3: you know, there was a time I was teasing, I

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Speaker 3: was about to detect. I'll just be like, if someone

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Speaker 3: calls me out and tries to talk about, hey, men

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Speaker 3: don't go for therapy or men in therapy are weird.

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Speaker 3: I just like, you sound like an idiot right now.

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Speaker 3: You sound like a dud.

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Speaker 4: True, I would say as well, So it partly answer

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Speaker 4: the first and second question that you had. So of course,

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Speaker 4: we are based in Zimbabwe, and the podcast is based

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Speaker 4: out of Zimbabwe. But one of the features that we

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Speaker 4: have in our Mental Wellness podcast is inviting our listeners

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Speaker 4: to write in their own issues and thoughts and experiences

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Speaker 4: and problems. And I would say, Phil, I think almost

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Speaker 4: one hundred percent of the letters we've received are from

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Speaker 4: outside of Zim, maybe one or two from inside.

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Speaker 3: No, we actually had a few, so I touched on

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Speaker 3: it briefly in our first episode back. But this past

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Speaker 3: like the last quarter of last year, was really acted

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Speaker 3: and I missed a bunch of emails. I'm really sorry, guys.

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Speaker 3: I looked like thirty emails that I missed bad, and

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Speaker 3: about thirty percent of those were people from ZIM. Okay,

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Speaker 3: there were even people the people that we helped who

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Speaker 3: didn't evolve their location. And then at the end they're like, oh,

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Speaker 3: by the way, if you're want to contact me, here's

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Speaker 3: my number. I'm here, and those are all like ZIM numbers.

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Speaker 3: So I think we've got a good enough mix. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: I think especially EXTI yeah, I will say. And this

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Speaker 3: is anecdotal, of course, and we have a very small

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Speaker 3: sample set, so this isn't scientific in any form of

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Speaker 3: formal fashion. But when we do get contact from ZIM,

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Speaker 3: it seems to be far more severe, you know what

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Speaker 3: I mean. It's almost like the person's nearing breaking points.

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Speaker 3: They really need help with a friend. It's like, Yo,

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Speaker 3: my friend is down bad, they really need help, please assist,

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Speaker 3: Whereas in Europe it's just you know, I'm feeling lonely,

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Speaker 3: time to feel the press. I have access to these resources,

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Speaker 3: I just need a little push to start accessing them.

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Speaker 3: Because in certain European countries they do have access toies.

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Speaker 3: So in certain European countries, ourments in the names. But

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Speaker 3: when we had a fund available and paying for therapy

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Speaker 3: for for listeners. Some of them were in countries where

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Speaker 3: it didn't seem that they were resources, but therapy was

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Speaker 3: mad expensive. I'm talking one hundred and fifty dollars a session.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, oh yeah, definitely over here in Australia, like everything else.

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Speaker 5: Is covered, but not they're not mental help.

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Speaker 6: What they will literally be like you can break your

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Speaker 6: legs and the next day break your arm will pay you.

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Speaker 5: It's fine.

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Speaker 6: But as you say, I'm depressed, like, oh yeah, that's

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Speaker 6: two hundred dollars a session with yeah.

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Speaker 2: Out of pocket, you definitely pay out of pocket. Not covered.

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Speaker 3: But Australians don't take mental Australians don't take mental health seriously.

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Speaker 3: The people that keep crocodiles as pets.

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Speaker 5: With the visa.

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Speaker 4: The mental health and visas are the two things Australia doesn't.

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Speaker 4: So I think, basically, what what what I say? Again,

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Speaker 4: like we're saying anecdotally, it does seem like people outside

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Speaker 4: the country definitely care more about it. Men specifically care

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Speaker 4: more about mental health issues than inside, even Zimbabweans outside

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Speaker 4: the country. And but but it's nice to see that

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Speaker 4: the conversation is growing and more and more people are

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Speaker 4: recognizing that it's something to take seriously.

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Speaker 2: That's great and I think you know, I mean, Phil

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Speaker 2: alluded to his own personality traits helping him manage the

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Speaker 2: stigma attached to wanting to improve your mental well being.

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Speaker 2: Maybe I can start with Dan and you know, with

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Speaker 2: the stigma attached, because you're saying that a lot majority

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Speaker 2: of your requests come from outside of the country, and

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Speaker 2: even outside the country, there's stigma attached period, like we

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Speaker 2: know this, like there is some level of does it

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Speaker 2: mean I'm failing? Does it mean I'm you know, there's

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Speaker 2: something wrong with me? Do you understand, like how do

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Speaker 2: you deal with that? Or what would you recommend in

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Speaker 2: dealing with the stigma, whether it be family. You know,

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Speaker 2: you hear things like oh, not too much. You know,

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Speaker 2: people don't identify that those are symptoms of it. You

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Speaker 2: should be happy you have X y Z. You know,

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Speaker 2: you know people having problems like bigger problems than you.

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Speaker 2: Or do you understand what I'm saying? Like there's often

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Speaker 2: like this perception that if you have food to some degree,

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Speaker 2: if you have sheltered to some degree, like you're good,

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Speaker 2: you have your basic needs met, Like come on, man,

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Speaker 2: they're bigger things in the world. So how do you

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Speaker 2: handle that and the stigma attached with too mental health

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Speaker 2: mental wellness.

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Speaker 4: I think there's a need to be a certain level

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Speaker 4: of unapologetic about it. So disclaimer, I'm I'm not in therapy,

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Speaker 4: and apart from maybe one or two ad hoc counseling sessions,

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Speaker 4: I haven't really been in therapy. So let me not

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Speaker 4: speak from personal experience, but just from observing how mental

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Speaker 4: health is treated. I think it's because, like you're saying,

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Speaker 4: many people view it as in Zimbabwe, it must be

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Speaker 4: you're at breaking point, like you know, you've reached a

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Speaker 4: level where you need to be institutionalized before we even

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Speaker 4: talk about mental health. And the fact that little by

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Speaker 4: little the conversation is growing shows that it's just that

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Speaker 4: people didn't understand or people had never heard or never

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Speaker 4: even thought about it. So the more unapologetic and the

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Speaker 4: more open we are about it, the more we talk about, oh,

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Speaker 4: I'm in therapy, I'm in therapy. It's not something that

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Speaker 4: should have a stigma attached to it. We shouldn't believe

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Speaker 4: it's something that's a stigma attached to it. So when

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Speaker 4: we talk about it, we shouldn't be like, oh, don't

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Speaker 4: tell anyone. But you know, when you're unapologetic, when you're

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Speaker 4: open about it, just like hey, I had to go

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Speaker 4: see the doctor, or I had to go take my

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Speaker 4: car to the mechanic, I had to go therapy. There's

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Speaker 4: things that we need to fix, so there's things that

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Speaker 4: we're doing to fix them. The more unapologetic we are,

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Speaker 4: then the more it will be accepted. And of course

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Speaker 4: the first few might have to be the martyrs, you know,

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Speaker 4: they're the ones who might have to face the worst

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Speaker 4: of the responses and backlash and stigma. But as time

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Speaker 4: goes on and as more and more people accept it,

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Speaker 4: then it will become more normal. And yeah, I guess

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Speaker 4: the stigma will never really completely disappear in my opinion,

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Speaker 4: but at least we can get rid of the worst

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Speaker 4: of it just by being unapologetically ourselves true.

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Speaker 2: And maybe phil if I can ask you to tag

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Speaker 2: onto that is, then how do you communicate sort of

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Speaker 2: the importance of mental health, like with people who just

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Speaker 2: have this sort of war, how do you say, like, hey, guys,

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Speaker 2: do you understand you know, especially from a Zimbabwan perspective.

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Speaker 2: Maybe it's family, maybe it's older people. Maybe how do

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Speaker 2: we you know, want you want to be unapologetic, but

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Speaker 2: we also want to mostly be like, hey guy, it's

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Speaker 2: just like X y Z. Do you have any suggestions

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Speaker 2: or thoughts around that.

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Speaker 3: I think the most important thing is to obviously reference

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Speaker 3: to your personal experiences and be honest and if you're

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Speaker 3: vulnerable enough to be honest about what you're going to

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Speaker 3: because lot of people don't want to talk about the

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Speaker 3: things that they're going to that it gives you credibility

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Speaker 3: and be it will resonate with the people who can

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Speaker 3: resonate it because there are people who are dealing with

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Speaker 3: the same thing. And the second thing is don't be preachy.

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Speaker 3: So don't be a vegan. Well and that's that's like

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Speaker 3: an inside joke, but yeah, just don't be like a vegan, like,

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Speaker 3: oh my god, you know animal products are killing the

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Speaker 3: environment and I do you know how much method camera

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Speaker 3: producer every day and like you guys are eating the

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Speaker 3: same with me. You know, the human bodies had even

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Speaker 3: designed to have them creating and you can hear your

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Speaker 3: terrible inside. Okay, that.

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Speaker 4: Netflix documentary, you absolutely have to watch it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, the moment, the moment you do that personal belief,

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Speaker 3: people are tuned out so that just be genuine and

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Speaker 3: honest and then say it helped me. It might help

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Speaker 3: you in the same way if a friend comes you

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Speaker 3: for advice and says, hey, this guy's not replying text

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Speaker 3: if you're not. I don't know all the dynamics of

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Speaker 3: but I do know the last time when the guy

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Speaker 3: didn't text me back, I realized it went ABCT. So

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Speaker 3: that's something for you to say that. That's that's farm

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Speaker 3: A bit of it is cheating.

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Speaker 2: On your count Listen, how dy does he know who

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Speaker 2: you are?

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Speaker 3: Oh?

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Speaker 6: My god, why are you so good?

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Speaker 2: And you're killing me? I'm thank you for that illustration.

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Speaker 2: It's very and I think too. It's also realizing like

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Speaker 2: some people will get it and some people won't get it. Like,

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Speaker 2: you know, my sister's very good at this. She uh,

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Speaker 2: whenever I'm dealing with an issue and with someone and

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Speaker 2: she's like, you know, some things these people just don't understand.

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Speaker 2: Like you need to understand your audience and be like,

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Speaker 2: I'm not going to pour my heart out or leave

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Speaker 2: it all on there for them to just trample on

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Speaker 2: my heart. So also knowing who's willing to understand that

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Speaker 2: someone you might express and they just be like aha

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Speaker 2: or whatever, and some people will get it. It's also

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Speaker 2: protecting yourself as well from certain people who are going

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Speaker 2: to be supportive and certain people who you know will

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Speaker 2: trample on your feelings, how you feel, what you're going through.

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Speaker 2: What about you? What do you think about overcoming stigma

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Speaker 2: where you are, whether it's home, whether it's you know, abroad.

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Speaker 6: I mean, I don't really think there's much more we

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Speaker 6: can add to what the guys have said. Like seriously,

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Speaker 6: I I on a personal level, I have dealt with

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Speaker 6: mental awareness or mental health and all that and going

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Speaker 6: through therapy. I think for me personally, it was that

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Speaker 6: disconnect from not being home since I always felt like

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Speaker 6: people misunderstood right every every room you enter, people are

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Speaker 6: like it gets tiring after a while.

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Speaker 5: You're like, I can't keep explaining why am I here?

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Speaker 6: Changes over the weekend, and like even when you go

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Speaker 6: through heartache and all that stuff, and like no one

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Speaker 6: to really get you, no one to really understand. But

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Speaker 6: at the same time, if I was home, people would

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Speaker 6: be like, ah, you live a soft life.

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Speaker 5: Now you want to be like crying.

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Speaker 6: Over a dude for ages, like get over it. So

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Speaker 6: it's like so hard because I don't know, like it's

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Speaker 6: such a personal thing. I think with stigma and I think,

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Speaker 6: as Dan said, you just have to be unapologetic because

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Speaker 6: people are gonna have opinions every which way.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I think we saw it a little well. It

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Speaker 2: wasn't mental to do with mental wellness, but to do

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Speaker 2: with Nathan. I don't know, if you guys are Insecure fans,

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Speaker 2: we are heavily into the show Instagram.

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Speaker 4: Oh my god, girl, the last season, I got her made.

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Speaker 2: I got hurt mad. But we saw with Nathan with

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Speaker 2: his his struggle, you know, and how he started opening up.

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Speaker 2: What was it? Was it schizophrenia?

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Speaker 3: You know, it was nuts, bipolar? Nathan had BiPOL and

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Speaker 3: you you in a security in a security because I.

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Speaker 2: Don't like Nathan. Nathan was just persona non.

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Speaker 3: But you guys didn't understand Nathan was done dirty, like okay,

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Speaker 3: and Nathan was like, I need to cut out these

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Speaker 3: toxic people from my life because why why is my

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Speaker 3: man so comfortable expressing his love for why is he

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Speaker 3: talking about barbecue? No, no, he was not only leaving

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Speaker 3: him late night calls.

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Speaker 2: He by.

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Speaker 4: The layers of Insecurity and Number one Insecure podcast exactly Okay,

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Speaker 4: we will be breaking down each episode for a by

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Speaker 4: frame to tell you everything that happened exactly.

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Speaker 2: Nathan.

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Speaker 3: Nathan was maybe not how to try, you know what

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Speaker 3: I mean. I don't like these jokes about, hey, Nathan

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Speaker 3: never cut nobody at the shop, but when did they

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Speaker 3: shoot the shop? Only shot one scene at the shop? Okay,

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Speaker 3: Clayton was out there.

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Speaker 5: But you're also ghosted, and we don't do ghosting.

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Speaker 3: Okay, So I think that's that's that's an important topic

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Speaker 3: you brought up that speaks to some of the issues

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Speaker 3: with mental health is when you're dealing in a person

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Speaker 3: of bipolar or anxiety written no stressful episode, you're not

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Speaker 3: thinking logically and you might not even be able to

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Speaker 3: express think image because when you're trying to tell someone hey,

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Speaker 3: I'm going through it, there's a really like like they

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Speaker 3: were not asking, so what are you going through? When

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Speaker 3: you don't want to speak about that because you're really

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Speaker 3: going through It's like it's like having to deal with

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Speaker 3: the trauma overall again. And as we saw our king Nathan,

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Speaker 3: you know what I mean, granted that title grunted, you

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Speaker 3: know what I mean, he was going through it. He

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Speaker 3: obviously should have communicated. He didn't, but when he got

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Speaker 3: his mind right, he came back and you know, let

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Speaker 3: and let Eason know what was going on. So either

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Speaker 3: should have been cognizant of some of the struggles because

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Speaker 3: being being with some of the good mental health issues,

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Speaker 3: you know, you've got to understand that you've got to

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Speaker 3: handle them a little different, you know what I mean. Granted,

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Speaker 3: they shouldn't be allowed to be abusive or neglectual, but

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Speaker 3: they do need a different it's soft a touch, if

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Speaker 3: you will. But he took it back, so I say it,

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Speaker 3: But but I mean, did you see those as girls

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Speaker 3: who wouldn't take him back? Come on, now, very beautiful man,

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Speaker 3: what a beautiful man? Anyway, I don't like how he

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Speaker 3: has been cast as diffuse when Nathan was doing right

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Speaker 3: by him. He was trying his best. Okay, let's not

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Speaker 3: forget how he meant.

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Speaker 4: Let's not forget if we if we cut out the

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Speaker 4: last ten minutes or so.

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Speaker 5: But you put up a good point.

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Speaker 6: How do you deal in relationships someone who's going through

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Speaker 6: mental health, like on a real like the ghosting, you

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Speaker 6: can be like, you know, okay, you're going through it,

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Speaker 6: but whilst you're going through it, I'm trying to live

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Speaker 6: our life like I'm trying to pay the bills.

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Speaker 5: I'm trying if you live together, I'm trying.

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Speaker 6: To keep it together right And also in a culture way,

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Speaker 6: we don't want other people to like comment and be

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Speaker 6: like hey, cool, you know what's happening? You know, like, so,

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Speaker 6: how do you honestly deal in a relationship?

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Speaker 3: Have some.

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Speaker 2: You?

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Speaker 3: Go ahead?

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Speaker 4: So this is not from personal experience, Okay, disclaim this

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Speaker 4: is not about you obviously, YEA, be like okay, So

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Speaker 4: first of all, first of all, I would love to

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Speaker 4: hear your opinions. How soon into a relationship should one's

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Speaker 4: perhaps mental health or wellness issues be disclosed before?

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Speaker 6: Yes, I agree, D one, I not date one. Let's

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Speaker 6: be honest, Dage one is the representative that is not

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Speaker 6: the real you, that is I start rating you, the

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Speaker 6: one who's.

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Speaker 2: Like, oh hi, I love it.

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Speaker 3: This is a woman.

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Speaker 2: You Guysage one.

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Speaker 6: Day one is we're going to go to a steakhouse

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Speaker 6: and pretend like like, let's be real.

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Speaker 4: Let it be noted that does not endorse lying. Day three,

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Speaker 4: Day three, day three. Okay, So at some point before

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Speaker 4: you're in a serious relationship, you would disclose that there

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Speaker 4: are some mental health issues that you may be dealing with.

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Speaker 2: If you know, especially if you know, it's going to

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Speaker 2: affect your communication or how you will relate to the person,

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Speaker 2: and then they'll be like it was fine, and then

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Speaker 2: you know, I think, okay.

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Speaker 4: So if we assume that at some point, maybe by

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Speaker 4: day three already like oh I like this girl, blah

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Speaker 4: blah blah, I need to tell her that I have

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Speaker 4: some issues that I'm dealing with, and if she accepts that,

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Speaker 4: maybe a little while later we might get into a

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Speaker 4: serious relationship. But she will go in knowing.

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Speaker 3: Right.

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Speaker 4: So if the other person, if let's say she knows

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Speaker 4: that I am dealing with some some issues, Okay, she knows,

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Speaker 4: does that take away the responsibility of my actions. No, Because,

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Speaker 4: on the one hand, like Phil said, hopefully, because she knows,

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Speaker 4: she's now dealing with me with a soft attach, you know,

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Speaker 4: because she knows that, hey, I might I might do

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Speaker 4: or say things in a particularly bad episode that I

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Speaker 4: wish I had control over but I don't really, uh,

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Speaker 4: And then I did something or said something that was wrong.

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Speaker 2: What kind of and at what level? Because listen, excusing everything? Right?

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Speaker 4: Sure, So let's use a simple example let's say ghosting.

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Speaker 4: So let's say we are now in a serious relationship

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Speaker 4: and I've just gone quiet for two weeks. I was

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Speaker 4: going I've been going through it. Okay, so you knew that.

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Speaker 4: I told you that I have a thing that I'm

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Speaker 4: dealing with. I told you.

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Speaker 3: You knew that.

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Speaker 4: So how much responsibility do I have for what has happened?

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Speaker 2: What are you doing when you ghosted? That's my question.

435
00:25:59,880 --> 00:26:03,240
Speaker 2: So my thing is we can talk about it after

436
00:26:03,280 --> 00:26:06,960
Speaker 2: the fact of ghosting, but I would expect a high

437
00:26:07,080 --> 00:26:10,359
Speaker 2: level of honesty about what you were going to so

438
00:26:10,480 --> 00:26:13,320
Speaker 2: I can be understanding, but I should also have some

439
00:26:13,840 --> 00:26:17,000
Speaker 2: expectations of we talk about it when you get through

440
00:26:17,600 --> 00:26:21,960
Speaker 2: that period or that difficult time, and they'll be honesty.

441
00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:26,960
Speaker 2: And certain things are not validated just because you're going

442
00:26:27,040 --> 00:26:30,960
Speaker 2: through an episode or a difficult time, like you can't

443
00:26:31,040 --> 00:26:33,800
Speaker 2: have gone and just like sleeping around, sleeping around and

444
00:26:33,840 --> 00:26:36,280
Speaker 2: sleeping around, you know, or you get what I mean,

445
00:26:36,359 --> 00:26:41,520
Speaker 2: Like there needs to be some level of like, but

446
00:26:41,720 --> 00:26:42,679
Speaker 2: aren't you saying.

447
00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:44,400
Speaker 6: That because you know it's two weeks? Because when it's

448
00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:46,359
Speaker 6: true ghosting, you don't know when it's going to end.

449
00:26:47,080 --> 00:26:49,560
Speaker 6: So you're waking up every day, looking at that phone,

450
00:26:49,640 --> 00:26:54,040
Speaker 6: there'll be no texts, no calls, nothing, no.

451
00:26:53,920 --> 00:26:54,920
Speaker 5: I ge stories.

452
00:26:56,520 --> 00:26:58,240
Speaker 4: So the reason I bring it up, by the way,

453
00:26:58,440 --> 00:27:04,000
Speaker 4: is because I think sometimes we you know, we put

454
00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:06,520
Speaker 4: the marker either at zero or one hundred. It's either

455
00:27:06,560 --> 00:27:09,760
Speaker 4: black or white. And I think it's never like that,

456
00:27:10,359 --> 00:27:12,840
Speaker 4: not just with mental health, but with anything in life. Really,

457
00:27:13,160 --> 00:27:18,240
Speaker 4: So in any situation, even if even if the person

458
00:27:18,320 --> 00:27:23,320
Speaker 4: is going through something, I mean obviously like someone outside

459
00:27:23,400 --> 00:27:26,240
Speaker 4: might not fully understand exactly what you're going through. But

460
00:27:26,359 --> 00:27:28,560
Speaker 4: even if you the person is going through something, surely

461
00:27:28,560 --> 00:27:30,240
Speaker 4: you'd have discussed that. Okay, we need to have some

462
00:27:30,359 --> 00:27:34,359
Speaker 4: kind of coping mechanism. For example, if if we know

463
00:27:34,560 --> 00:27:36,679
Speaker 4: that you go through these periods where I am just

464
00:27:36,760 --> 00:27:41,200
Speaker 4: in the doll drums I can't even speak, perhaps perhaps

465
00:27:41,200 --> 00:27:44,000
Speaker 4: a signaling arrangement could come into play where you say, listen,

466
00:27:44,359 --> 00:27:47,320
Speaker 4: it's one of those times I'm really sorry. We'll like,

467
00:27:47,600 --> 00:27:49,520
Speaker 4: we'll try catch up a bit later on or something,

468
00:27:49,600 --> 00:27:51,359
Speaker 4: and then you at least you understand what's going on.

469
00:27:51,640 --> 00:27:54,280
Speaker 4: That puts a little bit of responsibility on the person

470
00:27:54,320 --> 00:27:57,160
Speaker 4: even though they're facing whatever mental health issues. Maybe that's

471
00:27:57,200 --> 00:27:59,159
Speaker 4: too much. I don't know. We could discuss whatever it

472
00:27:59,160 --> 00:28:00,960
Speaker 4: is that you can hand or on handle. But I

473
00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:03,760
Speaker 4: don't like it when we speak that there's either zero

474
00:28:03,880 --> 00:28:06,159
Speaker 4: or one hundred percent responsibility. It can't be like that

475
00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:10,200
Speaker 4: because in a relationship there's two people obviously, so while

476
00:28:10,240 --> 00:28:12,879
Speaker 4: you're going through whatever you're going through, there's also the

477
00:28:12,920 --> 00:28:15,520
Speaker 4: other person who's going through something. Maybe now because of

478
00:28:15,560 --> 00:28:19,080
Speaker 4: the situation, and not to put blame on on a person,

479
00:28:19,119 --> 00:28:21,480
Speaker 4: because we don't want to say you're causing things, but

480
00:28:21,800 --> 00:28:26,280
Speaker 4: there has to be some level of understanding and agreement that, yes,

481
00:28:26,680 --> 00:28:29,520
Speaker 4: you have this thing that you're dealing with. But we

482
00:28:29,600 --> 00:28:31,640
Speaker 4: can't just say, oh, because you're dealing with something, then

483
00:28:31,640 --> 00:28:34,199
Speaker 4: everything's okay. It doesn't matter what happens. There has to

484
00:28:34,200 --> 00:28:36,800
Speaker 4: be some somewhere on the scale that you know, we

485
00:28:36,840 --> 00:28:43,880
Speaker 4: can figure something out. The alternative the answer to the

486
00:28:43,960 --> 00:28:47,640
Speaker 4: question earlier when I was saying, how soon into the relationship, like, listen,

487
00:28:47,720 --> 00:28:56,600
Speaker 4: date one and this.

488
00:28:56,640 --> 00:29:04,080
Speaker 3: Is so problematic, that tell me why? Well, speaking practically

489
00:29:04,320 --> 00:29:06,360
Speaker 3: as someone who has mental health issues and who does date,

490
00:29:06,760 --> 00:29:10,280
Speaker 3: who does this a few things, so yeah, as soon

491
00:29:10,320 --> 00:29:13,680
Speaker 3: as possible, I try to give the person who's the

492
00:29:13,760 --> 00:29:16,360
Speaker 3: lay of the land, and that that whoodles it down

493
00:29:17,200 --> 00:29:18,720
Speaker 3: very quickly for various reasons.

494
00:29:19,240 --> 00:29:25,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, but isn't that a good thing? Then it shows you, like.

495
00:29:26,840 --> 00:29:30,680
Speaker 3: Exactly, So what I what I do is I also

496
00:29:31,520 --> 00:29:33,880
Speaker 3: partly there being partly from books I'm reading. Is I

497
00:29:33,880 --> 00:29:36,560
Speaker 3: have a relationship use and so in that relationship use manual,

498
00:29:36,760 --> 00:29:41,960
Speaker 3: I discuss my interests, family background, my approach to relationships,

499
00:29:42,200 --> 00:29:44,200
Speaker 3: my mental health issues and how to deal with you

500
00:29:45,320 --> 00:29:48,280
Speaker 3: when I am anxious or when I am depressed, and

501
00:29:48,320 --> 00:29:52,400
Speaker 3: what I expect from you. And that then makes easy.

502
00:29:52,440 --> 00:29:55,040
Speaker 3: So for example, if we're in an argument and things

503
00:29:55,080 --> 00:29:57,600
Speaker 3: are getting heated and I say, hey, I need to

504
00:29:57,640 --> 00:30:00,360
Speaker 3: step away for a second, that doesn't mean I don't care,

505
00:30:00,600 --> 00:30:02,000
Speaker 3: It doesn't mean I don't want to be with you.

506
00:30:02,280 --> 00:30:03,920
Speaker 3: It means I need to step away for a second

507
00:30:03,960 --> 00:30:06,479
Speaker 3: because I'm starting to get anxiously needed and I went

508
00:30:06,520 --> 00:30:09,240
Speaker 3: on access and needed. Nothing productive is going to be

509
00:30:09,240 --> 00:30:12,360
Speaker 3: discussed because my body's going to go into fight to

510
00:30:12,400 --> 00:30:16,640
Speaker 3: flight mode and the adrenaline is going to overtake my

511
00:30:16,840 --> 00:30:19,320
Speaker 3: conscious thoughts. And then I'm just going to start, you know,

512
00:30:19,480 --> 00:30:22,600
Speaker 3: saying things that shouldn't be said or aren't helpful within

513
00:30:22,840 --> 00:30:25,720
Speaker 3: an argument setting. So stuff like that so in the

514
00:30:25,760 --> 00:30:30,280
Speaker 3: event that I do go quiet or I do disappear,

515
00:30:30,400 --> 00:30:34,320
Speaker 3: which I don't. Which It's another thing is having mental

516
00:30:34,320 --> 00:30:36,960
Speaker 3: health issues is not does not give you a card

517
00:30:37,080 --> 00:30:39,680
Speaker 3: blanche to treat someone poor, does not give you a

518
00:30:39,680 --> 00:30:44,880
Speaker 3: card blanche to ignore their needs. What I was trying

519
00:30:44,880 --> 00:30:47,920
Speaker 3: to say is it should at least give them an

520
00:30:47,960 --> 00:30:50,400
Speaker 3: informed understanding of what you're going through and how to

521
00:30:50,480 --> 00:30:52,800
Speaker 3: respond to it. So you can still call someone out,

522
00:30:53,240 --> 00:30:56,440
Speaker 3: but at least now if you've been given the full

523
00:30:56,600 --> 00:30:59,120
Speaker 3: understanding of what they're dealing with, you're not asking yourself

524
00:30:59,240 --> 00:31:04,720
Speaker 3: why you understand why. It's just, babe, I know you're anxious. Well,

525
00:31:04,720 --> 00:31:06,720
Speaker 3: I know your stress and you're depressed. I know you

526
00:31:06,720 --> 00:31:09,760
Speaker 3: don't want to speak to me. However, as your partner,

527
00:31:10,080 --> 00:31:12,240
Speaker 3: I just need you to check in. You don't even

528
00:31:12,280 --> 00:31:14,520
Speaker 3: have to email me, just I'm sorry. You don't even

529
00:31:14,520 --> 00:31:16,479
Speaker 3: have to text me, just email me and say everyone here,

530
00:31:16,520 --> 00:31:21,719
Speaker 3: bab still offline. I'm okay. And for some people that's

531
00:31:21,760 --> 00:31:23,360
Speaker 3: that's enough. You know what I mean, And then when

532
00:31:23,480 --> 00:31:25,480
Speaker 3: when you're when you're back in a good space, you

533
00:31:25,480 --> 00:31:29,920
Speaker 3: can have a bigger discussion. So I don't believe in

534
00:31:30,000 --> 00:31:32,479
Speaker 3: the idea of representatives. It's I think it's a it's

535
00:31:32,560 --> 00:31:37,840
Speaker 3: a sad result of social societal pressure and so forth.

536
00:31:37,880 --> 00:31:40,720
Speaker 3: But from from the jump, the fill you meet on

537
00:31:40,800 --> 00:31:43,200
Speaker 3: DAT one is the fill you're going to see throughout

538
00:31:43,640 --> 00:31:50,000
Speaker 3: because as a man who deals with women like women,

539
00:31:50,560 --> 00:31:52,160
Speaker 3: whenever you guys go on a date, the first thing

540
00:31:52,160 --> 00:31:54,080
Speaker 3: you have to consider is, well, this date kill me,

541
00:31:54,960 --> 00:31:59,800
Speaker 3: you know what I mean? Yeah, So because of that,

542
00:32:00,280 --> 00:32:04,120
Speaker 3: women are very attuned to identifying inconsistencies, which is why

543
00:32:04,160 --> 00:32:07,360
Speaker 3: you guys make incredible investigators and remember some of the

544
00:32:07,360 --> 00:32:11,560
Speaker 3: most arbitrary reasons. Like on Friday the sixteenth, you said

545
00:32:11,600 --> 00:32:15,360
Speaker 3: you went out with the boys, But I just spoke

546
00:32:15,400 --> 00:32:18,080
Speaker 3: to Josh and he says he was in Canada. So

547
00:32:18,120 --> 00:32:21,400
Speaker 3: which boy did you mean? Maybe those five years Ago're like, yeah,

548
00:32:21,440 --> 00:32:25,360
Speaker 3: I remember, But stuff like that, And that's because you

549
00:32:25,360 --> 00:32:29,960
Speaker 3: guys are highly attuned to identify inconsistencies, because inconsistencies could

550
00:32:30,080 --> 00:32:35,480
Speaker 3: equals death. Right. So if I have now said, if

551
00:32:35,520 --> 00:32:39,840
Speaker 3: I'm now sending a representative, there's only there's only so

552
00:32:40,040 --> 00:32:43,719
Speaker 3: much of that representative that I can keep suppressed I

553
00:32:43,720 --> 00:32:52,280
Speaker 3: mean versus the real mean. So eventually the going to man.

554
00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:55,440
Speaker 4: The first time you meet someone you like, obviously you're

555
00:32:55,440 --> 00:32:57,040
Speaker 4: going to try be your best self. That's all. We

556
00:32:57,120 --> 00:32:58,960
Speaker 4: may not pretend to be someone else.

557
00:33:01,680 --> 00:33:07,440
Speaker 3: You know what I do when I when I meet someone,

558
00:33:07,480 --> 00:33:09,040
Speaker 3: first thing I'm doing is I'm purping in fart.

559
00:33:09,200 --> 00:33:12,920
Speaker 4: Just let them know, no, that's why are you here

560
00:33:12,960 --> 00:33:13,240
Speaker 4: for me?

561
00:33:14,840 --> 00:33:17,280
Speaker 3: I'll be like, this is me, except me as I am.

562
00:33:19,680 --> 00:33:21,520
Speaker 3: That's how you we don't have the reels from the face.

563
00:33:23,720 --> 00:33:26,440
Speaker 4: What you're talking about, Phil absolutely is right. But I

564
00:33:26,440 --> 00:33:28,360
Speaker 4: mean deep, I mean when they were when they were

565
00:33:28,400 --> 00:33:31,440
Speaker 4: saying representative, they just mean obviously, when you meet someone

566
00:33:31,440 --> 00:33:33,560
Speaker 4: for the first time, you'll amplify your best traits and

567
00:33:33,600 --> 00:33:36,000
Speaker 4: try to suppress your worst. It doesn't mean you're pretending

568
00:33:36,040 --> 00:33:38,360
Speaker 4: to be someone else. It's huge. That's naturally how we are.

569
00:33:38,520 --> 00:33:40,400
Speaker 4: That's how you'd be in a job interview, for example.

570
00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:42,200
Speaker 4: You don't go into a job interview and just lounge

571
00:33:42,240 --> 00:33:44,120
Speaker 4: the same way you would at your friend's house. It

572
00:33:44,120 --> 00:33:45,920
Speaker 4: doesn't mean you're lying about who you are.

573
00:33:46,720 --> 00:33:48,760
Speaker 3: But Dan, if I have no negative qualities, then one

574
00:33:48,760 --> 00:33:49,480
Speaker 3: am I suppressors?

575
00:33:49,760 --> 00:33:51,640
Speaker 4: That is that is a problem. That is a problem

576
00:33:51,680 --> 00:33:53,480
Speaker 4: in Zimbabwe and men face that's true.

577
00:33:54,280 --> 00:33:56,280
Speaker 2: That's thank you. I'm sorry.

578
00:33:56,520 --> 00:33:59,520
Speaker 4: We continue no negative qualities.

579
00:33:59,600 --> 00:34:01,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, we're good.

580
00:34:01,360 --> 00:34:04,480
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'll say that, Phil, You're you're ultimately agreeing with me,

581
00:34:04,560 --> 00:34:09,640
Speaker 4: which is you don't get caught blanche because you're suffering

582
00:34:09,640 --> 00:34:12,160
Speaker 4: from a mental health issue. You still have to have

583
00:34:12,239 --> 00:34:15,080
Speaker 4: some level of responsibility and you will know best what

584
00:34:15,160 --> 00:34:17,279
Speaker 4: your limits and what your boundaries are. I mean, so

585
00:34:17,320 --> 00:34:20,840
Speaker 4: that's why you would discuss that beforehand. Exactly exactly what

586
00:34:20,880 --> 00:34:21,440
Speaker 4: you're saying.

587
00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:23,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think, Like, like I said, the whole point

588
00:34:23,680 --> 00:34:25,680
Speaker 3: of these discussions and the whole point, like the user manual,

589
00:34:25,800 --> 00:34:30,480
Speaker 3: is to alleviate the why. Because whenever someone does wrong

590
00:34:30,520 --> 00:34:33,880
Speaker 3: but you, or someone hurts you, or someone knows whatever,

591
00:34:33,920 --> 00:34:35,759
Speaker 3: like you guys said it, the first thing you can

592
00:34:35,840 --> 00:34:40,120
Speaker 3: ask youself is why. So if they've addressed the why,

593
00:34:40,640 --> 00:34:43,359
Speaker 3: it makes it easier, then you can. And then now

594
00:34:43,400 --> 00:34:45,640
Speaker 3: it's now dependent on what your tolerance levels are and

595
00:34:45,640 --> 00:34:48,160
Speaker 3: which one, because once again it doesn't give you card

596
00:34:48,200 --> 00:34:50,800
Speaker 3: blanche to be able to And on the flip side,

597
00:34:50,880 --> 00:34:53,640
Speaker 3: that doesn't mean that as a woman or as a partner,

598
00:34:53,680 --> 00:34:56,560
Speaker 3: you have to adjust your standards. Your standards are your standards.

599
00:34:56,600 --> 00:34:59,120
Speaker 3: No one has to explain your standard to you. So

600
00:34:59,440 --> 00:35:02,360
Speaker 3: if you who can't deal with someone going quiet for

601
00:35:02,440 --> 00:35:04,560
Speaker 3: three days out of the month. You don't have to

602
00:35:04,600 --> 00:35:08,640
Speaker 3: explain that and be like no, but you see, if

603
00:35:08,680 --> 00:35:11,480
Speaker 3: they're going silent on you too often, then you're comfortable

604
00:35:11,480 --> 00:35:14,960
Speaker 3: with you're justified and leaving, you know what I mean.

605
00:35:15,760 --> 00:35:18,840
Speaker 3: So it's always better to have all the cards at

606
00:35:18,840 --> 00:35:21,440
Speaker 3: the table so that both parties can make informed decisions.

607
00:35:21,800 --> 00:35:25,960
Speaker 3: What is unhealthy, even outside of the confines of mental illness,

608
00:35:25,960 --> 00:35:28,880
Speaker 3: but just dating in general, is when what I was

609
00:35:28,880 --> 00:35:32,160
Speaker 3: alluding to is when people are hiding stuff or they're

610
00:35:32,160 --> 00:35:36,080
Speaker 3: trying to misrepresent the full spectrum without a person, and

611
00:35:36,120 --> 00:35:39,279
Speaker 3: then now the person can't make an informed decision, or

612
00:35:39,320 --> 00:35:43,080
Speaker 3: even worse, they now start discovering things about you that

613
00:35:43,200 --> 00:35:47,640
Speaker 3: should have been revealed early on, but now within the

614
00:35:47,680 --> 00:35:51,200
Speaker 3: relationship because by doing that, you've now removed that person's

615
00:35:51,200 --> 00:35:54,319
Speaker 3: ability to make an informed decision, which is messed up.

616
00:35:54,920 --> 00:35:57,520
Speaker 3: So ultimately, put everything on the table as soon as

617
00:35:57,520 --> 00:35:59,920
Speaker 3: possible so the people can make an informed decision because

618
00:36:00,239 --> 00:36:02,680
Speaker 3: no one has invested a company and then six months

619
00:36:02,719 --> 00:36:05,319
Speaker 3: down the line they realize that the CEO is is

620
00:36:05,320 --> 00:36:09,040
Speaker 3: a crack addict. I mean, so in the stay respect

621
00:36:09,960 --> 00:36:11,440
Speaker 3: in a relationship, and then six months on the line

622
00:36:11,440 --> 00:36:13,640
Speaker 3: they realized that this dude don't shower.

623
00:36:16,239 --> 00:36:18,400
Speaker 4: Not not to imply that mental health issues are the

624
00:36:18,440 --> 00:36:20,280
Speaker 4: same as doing exactly.

625
00:36:23,400 --> 00:36:28,120
Speaker 2: It's an example, but it's not really exactly. You spell

626
00:36:28,880 --> 00:36:33,400
Speaker 2: about something earlier, which was around how living in zim

627
00:36:33,560 --> 00:36:38,279
Speaker 2: is very difficult. I think. I think Zimbabwans live with

628
00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:40,960
Speaker 2: a level of trauma to some degree, no matter whether

629
00:36:41,160 --> 00:36:44,000
Speaker 2: in the country outside the country, Like, there's a lot

630
00:36:44,040 --> 00:36:48,320
Speaker 2: we've kind of experienced and a lot of it is unresolved,

631
00:36:48,560 --> 00:36:53,200
Speaker 2: I feel, and you know, Amanda and I often talk

632
00:36:53,280 --> 00:36:56,960
Speaker 2: about like parents and how they do things and just

633
00:36:57,040 --> 00:36:59,319
Speaker 2: like bra like how did this happen? You know? And

634
00:36:59,360 --> 00:37:01,680
Speaker 2: it's it's a lot of things that they didn't have

635
00:37:01,719 --> 00:37:04,840
Speaker 2: the tools, they don't know they so they're just doing

636
00:37:05,400 --> 00:37:08,319
Speaker 2: what they know with what they can. And I think

637
00:37:08,360 --> 00:37:13,560
Speaker 2: there's a lot of trauma just in general as a people,

638
00:37:13,640 --> 00:37:16,560
Speaker 2: as a nation, and a lot of it being unresolved.

639
00:37:18,840 --> 00:37:25,160
Speaker 2: Do you think that a acknowledging unresolved trauma is like,

640
00:37:25,320 --> 00:37:28,880
Speaker 2: as Amanda said earlier, are cassoft life like you should

641
00:37:28,880 --> 00:37:30,920
Speaker 2: get over it by now you are now x y

642
00:37:31,000 --> 00:37:33,640
Speaker 2: z it years old, like you should be over it.

643
00:37:33,680 --> 00:37:38,320
Speaker 2: By now, and how then do you even approach dealing

644
00:37:38,360 --> 00:37:42,440
Speaker 2: with those kind of traumas that you realize, Oh, I

645
00:37:42,440 --> 00:37:46,359
Speaker 2: actually never resolved this issue or this trauma, and how

646
00:37:46,400 --> 00:37:47,839
Speaker 2: do I then move forward with that?

647
00:37:51,120 --> 00:37:54,560
Speaker 3: I would say, first and foremost, if you do like everyone,

648
00:37:55,040 --> 00:37:58,480
Speaker 3: everyone needs therapy to some degree, in the same respect

649
00:37:58,560 --> 00:38:02,720
Speaker 3: that you go for a doctor's up every year. Every

650
00:38:02,840 --> 00:38:07,240
Speaker 3: human should go with therapy because the world in general,

651
00:38:07,239 --> 00:38:10,239
Speaker 3: no matter where you grow up, there is trouble. The

652
00:38:10,280 --> 00:38:13,600
Speaker 3: world is messed up. Like even if you even if

653
00:38:13,640 --> 00:38:16,239
Speaker 3: you grew up in a utopia, if you just picked

654
00:38:16,280 --> 00:38:20,840
Speaker 3: up the newspaper, what go back? Because the world is traumatic.

655
00:38:21,560 --> 00:38:25,640
Speaker 3: So I think everyone should at least investigate some forms

656
00:38:25,640 --> 00:38:28,120
Speaker 3: of therapy, and there are various forms. It could be

657
00:38:28,200 --> 00:38:33,600
Speaker 3: a group discussion that's facilitated by a therapist or even

658
00:38:33,600 --> 00:38:37,080
Speaker 3: someone just qualified to have group discussions. It could it

659
00:38:37,080 --> 00:38:41,680
Speaker 3: could be therapy. It could be basic cognitive behavioral therapy

660
00:38:43,160 --> 00:38:46,800
Speaker 3: worksheets or processes, which is like asking yourself Socratic questions

661
00:38:46,920 --> 00:38:49,200
Speaker 3: or just trying to understand why you have a certain

662
00:38:49,200 --> 00:38:52,960
Speaker 3: thought patter. So say, for example, the women example is

663
00:38:53,200 --> 00:38:56,000
Speaker 3: being a Zimbabean. I realize about myself when I have

664
00:38:56,320 --> 00:38:59,280
Speaker 3: a substantial amount of zim dollars in my account. I

665
00:38:59,280 --> 00:39:02,880
Speaker 3: immediately that stressing and asked them, wait a wit, Why

666
00:39:02,920 --> 00:39:05,879
Speaker 3: do I stress when I receive a payment notification. It's

667
00:39:05,960 --> 00:39:10,359
Speaker 3: because I've lived through multiple economic crashes where I know,

668
00:39:10,960 --> 00:39:13,320
Speaker 3: if that money is sitting in my account, it's losing

669
00:39:13,440 --> 00:39:17,480
Speaker 3: value every circud, so I end up having to buy stuff.

670
00:39:17,840 --> 00:39:23,960
Speaker 3: And most recently, I think it was twenty eighteen, twenty eighteen,

671
00:39:24,520 --> 00:39:27,600
Speaker 3: just before I think it was SI two thousand was

672
00:39:27,600 --> 00:39:31,280
Speaker 3: Burton where they they forced us to switch to Zimbella

673
00:39:31,320 --> 00:39:33,680
Speaker 3: and the race shot up and I had I had

674
00:39:33,680 --> 00:39:36,880
Speaker 3: money sitting on my account and the rate was going crazy,

675
00:39:37,600 --> 00:39:40,000
Speaker 3: and I went. I went to the supermarket and I

676
00:39:40,080 --> 00:39:42,799
Speaker 3: bought things I didn't need. I left there was like

677
00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:47,640
Speaker 3: five trolleys like buying six cases of bubble bath. I

678
00:39:47,640 --> 00:39:50,920
Speaker 3: don't take bubble bums that often, you know what I mean?

679
00:39:51,640 --> 00:39:53,960
Speaker 4: And I had to say the key the key phrase

680
00:39:54,000 --> 00:39:55,040
Speaker 4: there that often.

681
00:39:56,400 --> 00:39:58,759
Speaker 3: As Dad can attests as someone who stayed with me,

682
00:39:59,000 --> 00:40:01,879
Speaker 3: but that's you. I led this soft life. That's another thing.

683
00:40:01,920 --> 00:40:04,160
Speaker 3: Like girls will come over and they'll realize, wait a minute, Phil,

684
00:40:05,640 --> 00:40:07,880
Speaker 3: Phil's well, Hidi protests, I mean, and then now I'm

685
00:40:07,920 --> 00:40:10,439
Speaker 3: judging you because I'm like, why do I have more

686
00:40:10,480 --> 00:40:13,240
Speaker 3: face watch protects than you? You gotta go girl, anyway,

687
00:40:13,360 --> 00:40:18,200
Speaker 3: I digress. So the point is, once you start asking

688
00:40:18,200 --> 00:40:20,359
Speaker 3: yourself that questions, it's it's obviously not going to solve

689
00:40:20,400 --> 00:40:22,000
Speaker 3: the whole issue, but it's at least going to give

690
00:40:22,000 --> 00:40:24,000
Speaker 3: you the tool to understand why you beabe a certain way.

691
00:40:24,200 --> 00:40:25,839
Speaker 3: And we understand why you behave a certain way, you're

692
00:40:25,880 --> 00:40:29,320
Speaker 3: able to particulately that other people, now your partner, your family,

693
00:40:29,400 --> 00:40:32,759
Speaker 3: your friends. Hey, babe, I lived in Zimbabwe. I went

694
00:40:32,800 --> 00:40:35,680
Speaker 3: through this as a result, I deal with the execty

695
00:40:35,719 --> 00:40:38,920
Speaker 3: this way and then whether or not they understand it,

696
00:40:38,960 --> 00:40:40,839
Speaker 3: they can even help you go there. So wait a minute,

697
00:40:40,840 --> 00:40:42,399
Speaker 3: but you do realize that right now you don't stay

698
00:40:42,440 --> 00:40:45,120
Speaker 3: in zimbab way. We stay in Australia and we don't

699
00:40:45,320 --> 00:40:49,399
Speaker 3: have those issues. So maybe work through that. Because there

700
00:40:49,400 --> 00:40:53,080
Speaker 3: are people Zimbolvement in particular that I know, because they

701
00:40:53,080 --> 00:40:56,920
Speaker 3: haven't resolved those issues, they find themselves a cure cruing. Yeah,

702
00:40:57,120 --> 00:41:02,720
Speaker 3: we go accruing assets that end up negatively affecting their portfolio,

703
00:41:02,920 --> 00:41:04,879
Speaker 3: which is why, for example, if you come to zim

704
00:41:04,920 --> 00:41:09,760
Speaker 3: you see a ton of these massive houses that are

705
00:41:10,000 --> 00:41:13,440
Speaker 3: falling apart in derelict because people had cash in hand,

706
00:41:13,520 --> 00:41:16,120
Speaker 3: they were like assets. Otherwise this money is going to

707
00:41:16,160 --> 00:41:18,879
Speaker 3: be useless. They buy homes they can't maintain, and now

708
00:41:18,880 --> 00:41:22,399
Speaker 3: those homes are losing value. That's that's a legit thing.

709
00:41:22,480 --> 00:41:24,680
Speaker 3: I used to have a boss. He spoke to me

710
00:41:24,719 --> 00:41:27,320
Speaker 3: and he was like, phil, if I have a million

711
00:41:27,360 --> 00:41:30,239
Speaker 3: dollars in my account, I can't sleep at night because

712
00:41:30,239 --> 00:41:32,640
Speaker 3: that money should be working for me. Because he toois

713
00:41:32,640 --> 00:41:34,120
Speaker 3: is a bobby and he's been doing the same thing.

714
00:41:34,600 --> 00:41:37,200
Speaker 3: So it can start as something as simple as that

715
00:41:37,880 --> 00:41:40,040
Speaker 3: in terms of the financialation, and it can be far

716
00:41:40,080 --> 00:41:44,320
Speaker 3: more traumatic. I mean, I don't think we have to

717
00:41:44,400 --> 00:41:47,280
Speaker 3: cover every minute of the traumas we experienced as evolveings,

718
00:41:47,320 --> 00:41:50,120
Speaker 3: but some of them are very politically charged, some of

719
00:41:50,120 --> 00:41:55,880
Speaker 3: them are very serious. Some of those really do require

720
00:41:57,440 --> 00:42:01,640
Speaker 3: psychiatrists and therapy and medication because people have seen a

721
00:42:01,680 --> 00:42:04,839
Speaker 3: great deal of trauma. I mean, if you just happen

722
00:42:04,880 --> 00:42:07,000
Speaker 3: to watch the news after the last set of elections,

723
00:42:07,040 --> 00:42:09,200
Speaker 3: we all know what we saw that that is traumatic.

724
00:42:10,920 --> 00:42:15,880
Speaker 3: So everyone needs to at least understand. I'm certainly not

725
00:42:15,920 --> 00:42:18,040
Speaker 3: going to going to therapy. But I will say, just

726
00:42:18,160 --> 00:42:21,719
Speaker 3: find someone who can speak to, and someone who's you

727
00:42:21,719 --> 00:42:24,920
Speaker 3: can speak to, who actually wants because that's another thing.

728
00:42:25,239 --> 00:42:28,000
Speaker 3: You also don't want to be that person who's constantly

729
00:42:28,200 --> 00:42:31,360
Speaker 3: offloading onto a friend and then now that friend doesn't

730
00:42:31,360 --> 00:42:34,120
Speaker 3: have the tools or resources to deal with that weight,

731
00:42:35,200 --> 00:42:37,719
Speaker 3: and now they're now suffering from depression because you just

732
00:42:37,760 --> 00:42:41,200
Speaker 3: ad and now you've allfloaded, so you're good. Now they're suffering,

733
00:42:42,280 --> 00:42:43,440
Speaker 3: So also be confnizant of.

734
00:42:43,440 --> 00:42:47,040
Speaker 2: That through that. That's so so.

735
00:42:47,239 --> 00:42:52,280
Speaker 4: True if your question as well, So it sounds almost

736
00:42:52,360 --> 00:42:57,560
Speaker 4: like you're asking if people's response is if you have trauma,

737
00:42:57,800 --> 00:43:00,279
Speaker 4: get over it. We all have trauma, yes, And if

738
00:43:00,320 --> 00:43:02,920
Speaker 4: someone chooses to deal with that trauma, then it's almost

739
00:43:02,920 --> 00:43:05,000
Speaker 4: like they are trying to live a soft life. That's

740
00:43:05,120 --> 00:43:07,520
Speaker 4: kind of what I understood by the question yes, which

741
00:43:07,760 --> 00:43:10,920
Speaker 4: I mean, I think we all know that's a not

742
00:43:10,960 --> 00:43:18,480
Speaker 4: a great viewpoint. Let me use nice words. Imagine imagine

743
00:43:18,680 --> 00:43:22,680
Speaker 4: telling someone get over your broken leg, or oh, you're

744
00:43:22,680 --> 00:43:25,560
Speaker 4: in a car accident. Everyone's been in a car accident,

745
00:43:25,600 --> 00:43:29,719
Speaker 4: get over it, just at home. So it's exactly the

746
00:43:29,760 --> 00:43:33,640
Speaker 4: same thing. And I mean, it's not soft life, it's

747
00:43:33,680 --> 00:43:37,160
Speaker 4: just a lack of understanding. It's true that many people

748
00:43:37,239 --> 00:43:39,919
Speaker 4: have had to go through trauma without resources to deal

749
00:43:39,920 --> 00:43:41,640
Speaker 4: with it, But why wouldn't you deal with it? If

750
00:43:41,680 --> 00:43:45,120
Speaker 4: the resources are available and accessible to you, Why would

751
00:43:45,160 --> 00:43:48,440
Speaker 4: you choose not to because those who needed it didn't

752
00:43:48,480 --> 00:43:52,239
Speaker 4: have the resources available. If it's there, go take advantage

753
00:43:52,239 --> 00:43:55,240
Speaker 4: of it. Why would you choose to suffer? That's because

754
00:43:55,520 --> 00:43:57,600
Speaker 4: real men don't get out of here man.

755
00:43:57,719 --> 00:44:03,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, so so good. And it's also helping you. Even

756
00:44:04,200 --> 00:44:07,640
Speaker 2: if our forefathers had their issues that they didn't deal with,

757
00:44:07,760 --> 00:44:10,200
Speaker 2: it's okay for us to work through it. So we

758
00:44:10,239 --> 00:44:13,640
Speaker 2: also know how to relate to them, understanding that maybe

759
00:44:13,640 --> 00:44:17,560
Speaker 2: they didn't have the tools, they may never seek the help.

760
00:44:18,239 --> 00:44:20,640
Speaker 2: But it also gives us a level of like how

761
00:44:20,640 --> 00:44:24,920
Speaker 2: do I how do I respond in these environments? How

762
00:44:24,920 --> 00:44:27,520
Speaker 2: do I deal with That's the other thing. It's also

763
00:44:27,560 --> 00:44:31,759
Speaker 2: empowering you or us to know how to work in

764
00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:34,800
Speaker 2: those environments and situations so we don't keep getting triggered

765
00:44:34,840 --> 00:44:38,719
Speaker 2: and falling back to you know, you know, patterns that

766
00:44:38,800 --> 00:44:41,560
Speaker 2: were not helping us along the way. Thank you, guys,

767
00:44:41,560 --> 00:44:43,640
Speaker 2: that was really that was really helpful. Thanks.

768
00:44:44,080 --> 00:44:46,759
Speaker 6: Yeah, And I think it does permeate into your like

769
00:44:46,840 --> 00:44:50,200
Speaker 6: other relationships or dealings with people, if you've got unresolved

770
00:44:50,400 --> 00:44:53,640
Speaker 6: mental issues, because it's like you're carrying this weight, right,

771
00:44:53,680 --> 00:44:56,400
Speaker 6: and anything like a balloon, anything that pokes that, it

772
00:44:56,520 --> 00:44:58,839
Speaker 6: would just people like, WHOA, why are you so said

773
00:44:58,880 --> 00:45:01,560
Speaker 6: about this? It's like a such a trigger from something

774
00:45:01,600 --> 00:45:03,520
Speaker 6: that you haven't really acknowledged.

775
00:45:03,920 --> 00:45:05,040
Speaker 5: So I think the living.

776
00:45:04,920 --> 00:45:07,560
Speaker 6: Soft life thing is like an opinion people have when

777
00:45:07,600 --> 00:45:10,759
Speaker 6: they just like, well, you know, well I dealt with it,

778
00:45:10,960 --> 00:45:13,800
Speaker 6: so you can. But it's like if they is, as

779
00:45:13,880 --> 00:45:16,240
Speaker 6: Dan said, if they had had the opportunity, I'm sure

780
00:45:17,440 --> 00:45:19,920
Speaker 6: they would want to have like sort proper health instead

781
00:45:19,920 --> 00:45:20,920
Speaker 6: of just sorry.

782
00:45:21,000 --> 00:45:25,200
Speaker 4: So something's really been been eating at me since we started.

783
00:45:26,239 --> 00:45:29,480
Speaker 4: I kind of feel like I'm talking about a topic

784
00:45:29,520 --> 00:45:34,840
Speaker 4: that I should, like, I don't have the credentials to

785
00:45:34,840 --> 00:45:38,799
Speaker 4: be talking about. So just a disclaimer, I don't view

786
00:45:38,800 --> 00:45:42,440
Speaker 4: myself as an expert like you guys. I'm just an

787
00:45:42,440 --> 00:45:46,120
Speaker 4: observer because we have a podcast that where we speak

788
00:45:46,200 --> 00:45:50,239
Speaker 4: to you know, therapists and mental health experts and advocates

789
00:45:50,280 --> 00:45:52,480
Speaker 4: and stuff like that, so you know, I get to

790
00:45:52,560 --> 00:45:55,640
Speaker 4: observe and learn a lot. So I'm speaking only my observations.

791
00:45:55,960 --> 00:45:58,560
Speaker 4: And that having been said, I must say, ever since

792
00:45:58,600 --> 00:46:02,839
Speaker 4: we've started, there's so many situations where I notice, like

793
00:46:02,880 --> 00:46:06,520
Speaker 4: I see someone's reaction or response or however they're dealing

794
00:46:06,520 --> 00:46:10,360
Speaker 4: with things, and it makes me think of this reminds

795
00:46:10,400 --> 00:46:13,720
Speaker 4: me of a conversation we had with doctor so and so, Yeah,

796
00:46:13,800 --> 00:46:16,600
Speaker 4: you need therapy girl, You know that kind of situation.

797
00:46:17,040 --> 00:46:20,040
Speaker 4: Just this week, for some reason, people call me to

798
00:46:20,120 --> 00:46:22,719
Speaker 4: rent or if they have issues. Happens quite a lot.

799
00:46:22,960 --> 00:46:24,480
Speaker 4: Just this week, I was listening to one and I

800
00:46:24,520 --> 00:46:27,600
Speaker 4: was like, sure, there's a lot here, and it's really

801
00:46:27,640 --> 00:46:30,080
Speaker 4: not about who's right or who's wrong. It's just you

802
00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:33,239
Speaker 4: need to speak to someone about a lot of things

803
00:46:33,280 --> 00:46:36,520
Speaker 4: that you're dealing with and carrying. And it makes me.

804
00:46:37,200 --> 00:46:39,360
Speaker 4: It makes me realize that most of us are just

805
00:46:39,400 --> 00:46:42,600
Speaker 4: walking around without realizing that our natural responses to things

806
00:46:42,840 --> 00:46:46,360
Speaker 4: are based on traumas that we've had and unresolved issues.

807
00:46:47,160 --> 00:46:51,160
Speaker 4: How much like think about all the drama and mess

808
00:46:51,200 --> 00:46:54,480
Speaker 4: we get ourselves into or we find ourselves in, thinking

809
00:46:54,520 --> 00:46:57,000
Speaker 4: that it's through no fault of our own. Meanwhile, it's

810
00:46:57,080 --> 00:46:59,439
Speaker 4: all these unresolved things that Hey, if I just spoke

811
00:46:59,480 --> 00:47:02,279
Speaker 4: to someone and they gave me the resources to deal

812
00:47:02,280 --> 00:47:04,640
Speaker 4: with this, like I would have never had to deal

813
00:47:04,680 --> 00:47:08,359
Speaker 4: with this, And I'm sure, I'm sure maybe sometimes there's

814
00:47:08,400 --> 00:47:10,960
Speaker 4: things I don't notice in myself that others perhaps also notice,

815
00:47:11,000 --> 00:47:13,319
Speaker 4: Like ugh, like you're saying, you know, people will see

816
00:47:13,320 --> 00:47:16,400
Speaker 4: how you respond to something, and it's like, Okay, clearly

817
00:47:16,440 --> 00:47:20,600
Speaker 4: there's something going on. And sometimes sometimes it may not

818
00:47:20,640 --> 00:47:23,319
Speaker 4: be in a huge dramatic response. Sometimes it's in the

819
00:47:23,360 --> 00:47:26,719
Speaker 4: little decisions that we make or stuff like that, you know,

820
00:47:27,160 --> 00:47:30,560
Speaker 4: or difficulties and trying to stick to plans we've made

821
00:47:30,640 --> 00:47:36,600
Speaker 4: or whatever the case is. So yeah, trauma is is

822
00:47:37,520 --> 00:47:41,359
Speaker 4: probably the biggest driving force in many of the things

823
00:47:41,360 --> 00:47:44,880
Speaker 4: that we're going through. And nottality is too.

824
00:47:45,200 --> 00:47:47,279
Speaker 6: Because like I finally, even for me, for myself, I

825
00:47:47,320 --> 00:47:50,440
Speaker 6: had to go through grief counseling because I lost my

826
00:47:50,560 --> 00:47:52,680
Speaker 6: mom at a young age, at a pivotal age, teenage.

827
00:47:52,719 --> 00:47:54,719
Speaker 6: You know, you're fourteen, You're thinking, oh, you know, it's

828
00:47:54,760 --> 00:47:57,480
Speaker 6: gonna have that person to have your back taken away.

829
00:47:57,800 --> 00:47:59,520
Speaker 5: And then in ZIM it's like, well.

830
00:47:59,320 --> 00:48:02,760
Speaker 6: Who hasn't had a parent who passed away on aunt

831
00:48:02,880 --> 00:48:05,439
Speaker 6: or so it's like people, grief is such a thing

832
00:48:05,480 --> 00:48:08,240
Speaker 6: that people don't really, you know, you have the Nammo,

833
00:48:08,400 --> 00:48:12,239
Speaker 6: you have the whatever tombstone, and then price we're all out,

834
00:48:12,320 --> 00:48:15,279
Speaker 6: you know next, And like I found, like in my

835
00:48:15,400 --> 00:48:18,799
Speaker 6: relationships a lot of times, then you just cut off

836
00:48:18,840 --> 00:48:21,480
Speaker 6: people so quickly because you're like, I can't really go

837
00:48:21,760 --> 00:48:24,760
Speaker 6: this level with you because I am myself. I am scared,

838
00:48:24,800 --> 00:48:27,759
Speaker 6: Like I'm obviously scared that I don't want to have

839
00:48:27,840 --> 00:48:30,120
Speaker 6: you to be that important in my life because then

840
00:48:30,120 --> 00:48:31,719
Speaker 6: one day if you're not there, what am I going

841
00:48:31,800 --> 00:48:33,960
Speaker 6: to do if I start to rely on you. So

842
00:48:34,040 --> 00:48:37,479
Speaker 6: I do think, like what you're saying is so right,

843
00:48:37,680 --> 00:48:41,560
Speaker 6: because if you yourself can't recognize those things and other

844
00:48:41,600 --> 00:48:44,400
Speaker 6: people can see it as clear as day, it's almost

845
00:48:44,440 --> 00:48:47,480
Speaker 6: like you're walking around with blinkers in your own life

846
00:48:47,719 --> 00:48:50,400
Speaker 6: and everyone's like, dude, if you literally just let this

847
00:48:50,560 --> 00:48:53,160
Speaker 6: go or found a way to deal with this, you

848
00:48:53,200 --> 00:48:55,239
Speaker 6: would see your life the way we see you.

849
00:48:55,239 --> 00:48:57,440
Speaker 5: You know, you see your light the way we see you.

850
00:48:58,320 --> 00:49:01,319
Speaker 6: So yeah, man, it's it's funny how it comes out

851
00:49:01,320 --> 00:49:02,839
Speaker 6: in the smallness of ways.

852
00:49:03,680 --> 00:49:05,480
Speaker 3: Yeah. And I think also the piggyback on what you

853
00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:07,360
Speaker 3: guys are saying, I think it's also very important to

854
00:49:07,400 --> 00:49:12,400
Speaker 3: understand how without thinking. People can fall into patterns of

855
00:49:12,480 --> 00:49:16,319
Speaker 3: an healthy behavior because that's what other people do like,

856
00:49:16,520 --> 00:49:21,360
Speaker 3: and that goes across the spectrum, like I'm sure we

857
00:49:21,480 --> 00:49:24,759
Speaker 3: all at that age. Dan has succumbed. It was the

858
00:49:24,800 --> 00:49:27,160
Speaker 3: first to crack. But when you cross as it is,

859
00:49:27,160 --> 00:49:29,720
Speaker 3: you're like, yo, why's' getting married while you're having kids?

860
00:49:29,880 --> 00:49:31,359
Speaker 3: And you ask them why, and you're like, no, because

861
00:49:31,360 --> 00:49:33,359
Speaker 3: that's what you what you do. And if you ask

862
00:49:33,400 --> 00:49:35,520
Speaker 3: why enough times, they're like, Okay, we don't know actually,

863
00:49:35,520 --> 00:49:38,799
Speaker 3: because that's just simply what society says you should do.

864
00:49:39,320 --> 00:49:42,760
Speaker 3: But when you break it down societally, the whole confines

865
00:49:42,800 --> 00:49:45,840
Speaker 3: of marriage and dating have changed so much because the

866
00:49:45,920 --> 00:49:48,279
Speaker 3: world has changed so much that you can't approach it

867
00:49:48,320 --> 00:49:51,360
Speaker 3: the same way people used to, which is why, for example,

868
00:49:51,840 --> 00:49:54,799
Speaker 3: you find people struggling with dating right now because the

869
00:49:54,880 --> 00:49:57,520
Speaker 3: landscape is so different than it was when even our

870
00:49:57,560 --> 00:50:01,320
Speaker 3: parents are dating. And because of that, a lot of

871
00:50:01,360 --> 00:50:05,080
Speaker 3: people get into that really unhealthy thought patterns on healthy

872
00:50:05,600 --> 00:50:10,000
Speaker 3: activities or action simply because they think that's what you

873
00:50:10,000 --> 00:50:16,320
Speaker 3: should do. And even on TV like reality TV is

874
00:50:16,880 --> 00:50:21,200
Speaker 3: the Devil and you see like people like a reality

875
00:50:21,200 --> 00:50:24,920
Speaker 3: TV people react for the for the camera they react

876
00:50:25,000 --> 00:50:29,800
Speaker 3: for drama, and people now think that's the norm. Okay,

877
00:50:29,960 --> 00:50:31,720
Speaker 3: So if I see a girl looking at my menthody,

878
00:50:31,760 --> 00:50:34,719
Speaker 3: I should do that. Oh if my girl is doing this,

879
00:50:34,760 --> 00:50:37,680
Speaker 3: I should do that. And as dancers, if people come

880
00:50:37,719 --> 00:50:38,879
Speaker 3: to you and they start writing and you are said,

881
00:50:38,880 --> 00:50:40,759
Speaker 3: wait a minute, why did you do that? Like, because

882
00:50:40,760 --> 00:50:42,360
Speaker 3: that's what I'm supposed to I'm a man, that's not

883
00:50:42,400 --> 00:50:45,800
Speaker 3: I supposed to. I'm a woman. You're like, really, what

884
00:50:46,320 --> 00:50:49,320
Speaker 3: makes you think that? And if you're asking why enough times,

885
00:50:49,320 --> 00:50:51,680
Speaker 3: it'll just build down to But that's what you should

886
00:50:51,719 --> 00:50:55,399
Speaker 3: be doing. And we I think if anything, even if

887
00:50:55,400 --> 00:50:59,600
Speaker 3: you're not in Derby, ask yourself why at least four

888
00:50:59,600 --> 00:51:03,319
Speaker 3: times for any major action, and when you get down

889
00:51:03,360 --> 00:51:06,560
Speaker 3: to the root, you might be surprised what is behind

890
00:51:06,600 --> 00:51:06,959
Speaker 3: that action.

891
00:51:09,480 --> 00:51:12,520
Speaker 4: Well, just just to just to clarify, I I haven't

892
00:51:12,520 --> 00:51:18,719
Speaker 4: been struggling dating. I've been quite successful, and I am

893
00:51:18,880 --> 00:51:23,239
Speaker 4: offering advice to those who are less successful. You can

894
00:51:23,239 --> 00:51:27,600
Speaker 4: subscribe to my Daily Relationship devotionals, but if I can

895
00:51:27,600 --> 00:51:30,520
Speaker 4: give you a free piece of advice now, ladies, if

896
00:51:30,560 --> 00:51:34,719
Speaker 4: you're interested, shoot, when you move with the spirit of

897
00:51:34,719 --> 00:51:37,720
Speaker 4: a girlfriend as opposed to the spirit of a wife.

898
00:51:38,719 --> 00:51:42,800
Speaker 4: You know, energies are just different. So I just your spirit,

899
00:51:43,600 --> 00:51:47,560
Speaker 4: you see. I think that's as clear as Andy too.

900
00:51:48,000 --> 00:51:49,799
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, you.

901
00:51:51,440 --> 00:51:54,440
Speaker 4: Have to move with the spirit of a husband, osbone,

902
00:51:55,640 --> 00:51:59,280
Speaker 4: even if you're not planning to become a husband. There's

903
00:51:59,360 --> 00:52:02,319
Speaker 4: just different spirits, you know. I think this is the

904
00:52:02,360 --> 00:52:05,400
Speaker 4: clearest thing, honestly, guys. So that's the first free lesson.

905
00:52:05,880 --> 00:52:08,520
Speaker 2: So where do we subscribe for this? Sorry? Just taking

906
00:52:08,680 --> 00:52:09,640
Speaker 2: me just with like.

907
00:52:10,400 --> 00:52:14,600
Speaker 3: YouTube dot com forward slash Dennis Jackson. That's Dennis Jackson.

908
00:52:19,000 --> 00:52:22,000
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, thank you, thank you very much, thank you

909
00:52:22,080 --> 00:52:22,480
Speaker 2: very much.

910
00:52:22,719 --> 00:52:24,919
Speaker 6: It's funny though that you brought up like, you know,

911
00:52:25,360 --> 00:52:28,480
Speaker 6: male female. Do you think with like mental health or

912
00:52:28,560 --> 00:52:32,839
Speaker 6: like mental wellness, it's different for women than for men,

913
00:52:32,960 --> 00:52:35,279
Speaker 6: like us talking about it as I mean, I know

914
00:52:35,320 --> 00:52:37,480
Speaker 6: women do a lot of this whole South cast Sundays

915
00:52:37,520 --> 00:52:39,200
Speaker 6: and we you know, meet with the girls for a

916
00:52:39,200 --> 00:52:40,360
Speaker 6: branch or whatever it is.

917
00:52:40,880 --> 00:52:41,480
Speaker 3: I do that.

918
00:52:42,200 --> 00:52:46,359
Speaker 2: Oh there come through. But like do you.

919
00:52:46,360 --> 00:52:50,320
Speaker 6: Think just generally, like even from your listeners and feedback,

920
00:52:50,320 --> 00:52:54,560
Speaker 6: you guys have gotten that it's different for men versus women.

921
00:52:55,560 --> 00:52:58,960
Speaker 3: I think it's obviously different because men and women are

922
00:52:59,000 --> 00:53:01,200
Speaker 3: too did the same, like men and women under raised

923
00:53:01,200 --> 00:53:06,680
Speaker 3: with the same expectations, and we see that now like

924
00:53:08,040 --> 00:53:09,839
Speaker 3: I'm as a bubble man, so I can speak to it.

925
00:53:12,200 --> 00:53:14,719
Speaker 3: I thank my mother for raising me the way she did.

926
00:53:14,760 --> 00:53:18,719
Speaker 3: Because my mother raised me. She was like, yo, if

927
00:53:18,719 --> 00:53:21,560
Speaker 3: you if you ate from that plate, you're gonna wash

928
00:53:21,600 --> 00:53:24,000
Speaker 3: that plate, You're gonna clean your room, You're gonna so

929
00:53:24,160 --> 00:53:26,080
Speaker 3: you're gonna cook your own food. You're gonna cook for

930
00:53:26,160 --> 00:53:27,759
Speaker 3: the family, that type of thing. So by the time

931
00:53:27,800 --> 00:53:31,640
Speaker 3: I left, I left home thinking I was filthy. You

932
00:53:31,640 --> 00:53:33,919
Speaker 3: know what I meant. I thought I thought. I left

933
00:53:33,920 --> 00:53:36,319
Speaker 3: home thinking that I wasn't good. And then I moved

934
00:53:36,320 --> 00:53:40,240
Speaker 3: in with Dan. I was like, oh, you know, Mama

935
00:53:40,320 --> 00:53:45,040
Speaker 3: raised me. But I'm.

936
00:53:46,800 --> 00:53:48,400
Speaker 2: Well, cancel the subscription to you.

937
00:53:48,560 --> 00:53:51,240
Speaker 3: I'm just making sure the wife knows what she's getting into.

938
00:53:51,520 --> 00:53:56,120
Speaker 3: But jokes aside, what that translates to is the buyers

939
00:53:56,200 --> 00:53:58,160
Speaker 3: on the floor where a woman can come up. He's like,

940
00:53:58,160 --> 00:53:59,880
Speaker 3: wait a minute, Phil, you cook this. Wait a minute,

941
00:54:00,080 --> 00:54:05,719
Speaker 3: feel you have toilet paper in your bathroom? Yeah, you

942
00:54:05,760 --> 00:54:11,799
Speaker 3: have wet wives stuff like that, But that's just a top.

943
00:54:12,000 --> 00:54:13,000
Speaker 4: You would be surprised.

944
00:54:14,960 --> 00:54:18,880
Speaker 3: But societally, women get treated very differently because the expectations

945
00:54:18,920 --> 00:54:21,440
Speaker 3: are different, like and we just came out of the

946
00:54:21,440 --> 00:54:26,719
Speaker 3: festive season. I'm sure you guys understand it when women,

947
00:54:27,040 --> 00:54:29,480
Speaker 3: For a lot of women, the festive season is not

948
00:54:29,560 --> 00:54:32,759
Speaker 3: a holiday. You're just changing your your responsibility. You're leaving

949
00:54:32,760 --> 00:54:35,359
Speaker 3: the day job and you're not becoming the maid for

950
00:54:35,400 --> 00:54:37,439
Speaker 3: like two three weeks and you're going to go back

951
00:54:37,640 --> 00:54:41,080
Speaker 3: to your day job. And as men, I think it's

952
00:54:41,080 --> 00:54:43,120
Speaker 3: incumbent on us to be cognizant of that at the

953
00:54:43,120 --> 00:54:46,840
Speaker 3: empathetic and be like, hey, if you need a holiday,

954
00:54:46,920 --> 00:54:50,880
Speaker 3: let me actually give you a holiday. And women also

955
00:54:50,920 --> 00:54:54,239
Speaker 3: need to understand that. Granted, it's a patiocal society and

956
00:54:54,320 --> 00:54:57,239
Speaker 3: men were very involved in creating the Patioga society, but

957
00:54:57,320 --> 00:55:00,040
Speaker 3: within that there's a lot of expectations and precious so

958
00:55:00,200 --> 00:55:02,239
Speaker 3: like women will come to a man and be like,

959
00:55:02,280 --> 00:55:04,160
Speaker 3: I expect a man to be able to provide and

960
00:55:04,239 --> 00:55:06,879
Speaker 3: take care of me. This the third which is fair

961
00:55:07,040 --> 00:55:10,399
Speaker 3: a fair request in isolation, but when you now look

962
00:55:10,400 --> 00:55:14,200
Speaker 3: at the grand society and Dan and I joke about this,

963
00:55:14,239 --> 00:55:16,239
Speaker 3: but it's true, like if a woman from the UK,

964
00:55:16,400 --> 00:55:18,160
Speaker 3: so that even south at for examples, it is m

965
00:55:18,160 --> 00:55:20,799
Speaker 3: barbwe man. We joke about it. But it's true you

966
00:55:21,160 --> 00:55:24,080
Speaker 3: for the most part, you are the breadwinner because no

967
00:55:24,120 --> 00:55:26,719
Speaker 3: matter how well he's paid, no matter how good his

968
00:55:26,840 --> 00:55:30,920
Speaker 3: job is, you are always going to earn more than him.

969
00:55:31,040 --> 00:55:33,319
Speaker 3: And if you speak to some of these people in

970
00:55:33,400 --> 00:55:36,840
Speaker 3: managerial or even c stree positions, you'll just understand just

971
00:55:36,880 --> 00:55:40,960
Speaker 3: how dire the situation is. So it's not then fair

972
00:55:41,360 --> 00:55:44,000
Speaker 3: for yours as Zimbabwean woman, to expect data's in barbie

973
00:55:44,040 --> 00:55:47,160
Speaker 3: men in Zimbabwe and you're asking him, go babe, when

974
00:55:47,160 --> 00:55:48,200
Speaker 3: are we going to the Maldives?

975
00:55:49,960 --> 00:55:54,160
Speaker 2: Now I'm trying to make grant you know what I mean, like.

976
00:55:55,600 --> 00:55:58,800
Speaker 3: That type of thing, And if people aren't having these honest,

977
00:55:58,840 --> 00:56:01,719
Speaker 3: open conversations about small stuff like that, it's going to

978
00:56:01,760 --> 00:56:05,640
Speaker 3: see been into bigger things. So ultimately it all boils

979
00:56:05,680 --> 00:56:08,960
Speaker 3: down to empathy and communication. If I think if we

980
00:56:09,000 --> 00:56:13,440
Speaker 3: could be more empathetic and be better communicating, itould address

981
00:56:13,440 --> 00:56:16,200
Speaker 3: a lot of the issues that we as an admission

982
00:56:16,200 --> 00:56:20,360
Speaker 3: as a society is that people are facing. Because if

983
00:56:20,400 --> 00:56:22,160
Speaker 3: you at least understand where someone's coming from, it's a

984
00:56:22,200 --> 00:56:25,680
Speaker 3: lot easier for you to give them grace and what's

985
00:56:25,680 --> 00:56:27,440
Speaker 3: to call them out when they overstep?

986
00:56:29,520 --> 00:56:34,520
Speaker 4: Also in terms of acceptance. There definitely is a difference

987
00:56:34,560 --> 00:56:40,680
Speaker 4: because society being very patriarchal and especially you know, groups

988
00:56:40,719 --> 00:56:43,719
Speaker 4: of men and how they see I don't want to

989
00:56:43,719 --> 00:56:45,520
Speaker 4: I don't want to use a lot of these buzzwords,

990
00:56:45,760 --> 00:56:50,000
Speaker 4: you know that, the Twitter words, But toxic masculinity is

991
00:56:50,040 --> 00:56:52,000
Speaker 4: a thing, you know what I mean. Like groups of

992
00:56:52,040 --> 00:56:57,239
Speaker 4: men have certain like viewpoints about each other about what

993
00:56:57,360 --> 00:56:59,960
Speaker 4: it is to be a man. So when it come

994
00:57:00,120 --> 00:57:02,239
Speaker 4: to acceptance, I think a lot of people are a

995
00:57:02,280 --> 00:57:04,640
Speaker 4: lot more accepting that. Oh you know, a woman is

996
00:57:04,880 --> 00:57:07,360
Speaker 4: in therapy. Oh yeah, that's part of the course that's expected.

997
00:57:07,640 --> 00:57:09,680
Speaker 4: A man is in therapy. Wait, what what's wrong with him?

998
00:57:09,920 --> 00:57:12,360
Speaker 4: I feel like society views it like that a lot,

999
00:57:12,880 --> 00:57:15,359
Speaker 4: and that causes a lot of problems. Not to get

1000
00:57:15,400 --> 00:57:19,280
Speaker 4: into discussions of who needs it more, who doesn't need

1001
00:57:19,280 --> 00:57:22,560
Speaker 4: it more, because everyone has their own unique challenges, and

1002
00:57:22,640 --> 00:57:24,640
Speaker 4: men have unique issues that they have to deal with,

1003
00:57:24,680 --> 00:57:26,680
Speaker 4: and women have unique issues that they have to deal with.

1004
00:57:27,200 --> 00:57:30,880
Speaker 4: But I think for men it's approaching a very dire

1005
00:57:30,960 --> 00:57:35,480
Speaker 4: situation because oftentimes men are in a position where what

1006
00:57:35,560 --> 00:57:38,760
Speaker 4: they say and do has influence over more people. It

1007
00:57:38,800 --> 00:57:40,959
Speaker 4: could be over the family, you know, or it could

1008
00:57:41,000 --> 00:57:46,520
Speaker 4: be over a work environment where repeatedly we see that

1009
00:57:46,600 --> 00:57:49,800
Speaker 4: very often men are placed in positions of authority more

1010
00:57:49,840 --> 00:57:52,720
Speaker 4: than women and so on. And that man who has

1011
00:57:52,760 --> 00:57:55,240
Speaker 4: this position of influence over people around him, a position

1012
00:57:55,280 --> 00:57:58,120
Speaker 4: of power over his family, over his wife, he's kids,

1013
00:57:58,440 --> 00:58:01,320
Speaker 4: has all these traumas that he has never dealt with. Meanwhile,

1014
00:58:01,360 --> 00:58:03,760
Speaker 4: society expects him to just be a man shake it off.

1015
00:58:04,200 --> 00:58:06,400
Speaker 4: And on top of that, there's expectations that, now, if

1016
00:58:06,400 --> 00:58:08,040
Speaker 4: you're a man, you're supposed to do this and that,

1017
00:58:08,520 --> 00:58:12,720
Speaker 4: and there's traumas, and there's whatever emotional baggage and who

1018
00:58:12,760 --> 00:58:16,200
Speaker 4: knows what mental health issues you're dealing with. More men

1019
00:58:16,240 --> 00:58:20,000
Speaker 4: need to get into therapy, absolutely because if society doesn't

1020
00:58:20,000 --> 00:58:26,080
Speaker 4: accept it, and it's just think of the boiling that's

1021
00:58:26,080 --> 00:58:31,760
Speaker 4: happening just under the surface so many men. And the

1022
00:58:31,800 --> 00:58:33,760
Speaker 4: flip side of this is, I don't want to make

1023
00:58:33,800 --> 00:58:36,120
Speaker 4: it seem like, oh, men have it bad or whatever,

1024
00:58:36,240 --> 00:58:38,880
Speaker 4: like you know some of the in cell logic that's

1025
00:58:38,920 --> 00:58:41,680
Speaker 4: going around right now. It's just a simple matter of

1026
00:58:41,720 --> 00:58:43,240
Speaker 4: we all have things that we need to deal with,

1027
00:58:43,280 --> 00:58:47,760
Speaker 4: and because of society's expectations, probably a lot of men

1028
00:58:48,080 --> 00:58:50,960
Speaker 4: don't take steps to deal with it, whereas women. Maybe

1029
00:58:51,760 --> 00:58:53,680
Speaker 4: it may not be the case across the spectrum, but

1030
00:58:53,720 --> 00:58:56,400
Speaker 4: I think as a general rule, it's more accepted for

1031
00:58:56,480 --> 00:58:58,760
Speaker 4: a woman to set aside time to help or to

1032
00:58:58,800 --> 00:59:01,040
Speaker 4: deal with their mental health issue, choose or to have

1033
00:59:01,080 --> 00:59:03,720
Speaker 4: a self care day or you know, I'm just going

1034
00:59:03,760 --> 00:59:06,120
Speaker 4: to pamper myself today and whatever. And maybe men don't

1035
00:59:06,160 --> 00:59:10,120
Speaker 4: do that as much, or their version of what self

1036
00:59:10,160 --> 00:59:13,120
Speaker 4: care or pampering is actually exacerbating a problem.

1037
00:59:13,880 --> 00:59:19,120
Speaker 2: For sure. I almost had to also unlearn the sort

1038
00:59:19,120 --> 00:59:23,160
Speaker 2: of stereotypes associated with what it means to be a man.

1039
00:59:23,240 --> 00:59:26,640
Speaker 2: So even as women, I think we also need to

1040
00:59:27,880 --> 00:59:32,440
Speaker 2: understand that a men in general are struggling because of

1041
00:59:32,520 --> 00:59:36,120
Speaker 2: the sort of standards they've been held to, like this

1042
00:59:36,160 --> 00:59:37,880
Speaker 2: is what it means to be a man. Big men

1043
00:59:37,920 --> 00:59:40,560
Speaker 2: don't cry, you know, that kind of thing. But even

1044
00:59:40,560 --> 00:59:43,560
Speaker 2: on learning that, so that our expectations as women for

1045
00:59:43,720 --> 00:59:47,240
Speaker 2: what we expect in men, whether it be our brothers,

1046
00:59:47,280 --> 00:59:50,120
Speaker 2: whether it be our friends, whether it be our partners,

1047
00:59:50,240 --> 00:59:54,800
Speaker 2: or we have to shift that too. Because I didn't

1048
00:59:54,840 --> 00:59:56,880
Speaker 2: realize it, and I remember when it dawned on me,

1049
00:59:56,960 --> 00:59:59,959
Speaker 2: I was like, I didn't realize I had this idea

1050
01:00:00,040 --> 01:00:02,960
Speaker 2: because I think I'm a forward thinking, open minded person,

1051
01:00:03,080 --> 01:00:05,400
Speaker 2: but it's actually the ingraining and there's a lot of

1052
01:00:05,440 --> 01:00:08,240
Speaker 2: unlearning that has to go on as a society in

1053
01:00:08,320 --> 01:00:11,600
Speaker 2: general around what it means to be a woman, what

1054
01:00:11,640 --> 01:00:13,920
Speaker 2: it means to be a man. Is it okay to

1055
01:00:14,000 --> 01:00:17,080
Speaker 2: ask for help? Is it okay? You know, things like that.

1056
01:00:17,240 --> 01:00:21,400
Speaker 2: So that's something I also kind of have learned that

1057
01:00:21,440 --> 01:00:23,560
Speaker 2: as a society, it's a lot of unlearning and being

1058
01:00:23,640 --> 01:00:27,120
Speaker 2: uncomfortable being different and saying that I don't have these

1059
01:00:27,160 --> 01:00:31,280
Speaker 2: expectations of men or I don't have these expectations of women,

1060
01:00:32,200 --> 01:00:34,640
Speaker 2: and I stand by it, even if family will be

1061
01:00:34,680 --> 01:00:38,880
Speaker 2: like ah uku nasi a see you know what I mean,

1062
01:00:39,000 --> 01:00:43,040
Speaker 2: Like things like that, it's like exactly, it's like, well,

1063
01:00:43,280 --> 01:00:46,400
Speaker 2: I'm gonna help her, or if you know he needs

1064
01:00:46,440 --> 01:00:50,120
Speaker 2: to take time off, ah ascandalbasa murumahaka, you know what

1065
01:00:50,200 --> 01:00:52,720
Speaker 2: I mean. So there's also like a role we play

1066
01:00:52,760 --> 01:00:55,640
Speaker 2: in supporting each other as men and as women with

1067
01:00:55,680 --> 01:00:58,520
Speaker 2: regards to our mental wellness.

1068
01:00:59,120 --> 01:01:04,520
Speaker 4: Even in small things. So I see a stereotype and

1069
01:01:04,560 --> 01:01:06,919
Speaker 4: something I've seen in myself as well that is often

1070
01:01:07,000 --> 01:01:08,840
Speaker 4: joked about. It is like, yeah, men don't ask for

1071
01:01:08,880 --> 01:01:11,560
Speaker 4: directions at all. I mean, I've joked about itself, but

1072
01:01:11,880 --> 01:01:15,600
Speaker 4: I've seen a reluctance sometimes to ask for help. You

1073
01:01:15,640 --> 01:01:18,760
Speaker 4: could be lost somewhere, like I'm supposed to figure it out.

1074
01:01:18,800 --> 01:01:21,480
Speaker 4: I'm the man who's supposed to figure it out. Yeah,

1075
01:01:21,840 --> 01:01:25,160
Speaker 4: logically that makes no sense. Why why would you hold

1076
01:01:25,160 --> 01:01:27,600
Speaker 4: yourself to that stat What does it? It doesn't change, doesn't

1077
01:01:27,640 --> 01:01:29,680
Speaker 4: make you less of a man because you were lost. Word,

1078
01:01:30,120 --> 01:01:34,040
Speaker 4: that's crazy. But I think those little things and I've

1079
01:01:34,040 --> 01:01:36,240
Speaker 4: seen it like I've felt it myself. I've been with

1080
01:01:36,520 --> 01:01:38,640
Speaker 4: other people in the cans. I just ask someone where

1081
01:01:38,680 --> 01:01:42,880
Speaker 4: we're supposed to go? Ask someone? What am I some

1082
01:01:42,960 --> 01:01:45,240
Speaker 4: kind of chump? Figure it out myself?

1083
01:01:46,720 --> 01:01:47,080
Speaker 3: Chump?

1084
01:01:47,320 --> 01:01:51,880
Speaker 2: I love that word thousand percent. And I think as

1085
01:01:51,920 --> 01:01:56,000
Speaker 2: we bring this to a close, I wanted to ask

1086
01:01:56,080 --> 01:02:00,520
Speaker 2: any advice you can share. Obviously, your podcast delves more

1087
01:02:00,520 --> 01:02:04,000
Speaker 2: in depth with regards to mental wellness. As Danny says,

1088
01:02:04,160 --> 01:02:07,760
Speaker 2: he's not a professional, I'm not. We're not professionals. We're

1089
01:02:07,800 --> 01:02:12,000
Speaker 2: just sharing our thoughts and experiences. But they also speak

1090
01:02:12,080 --> 01:02:16,800
Speaker 2: to some different people around the topic of mental health

1091
01:02:17,320 --> 01:02:19,840
Speaker 2: and you can definitely check out their podcast for more

1092
01:02:19,880 --> 01:02:22,920
Speaker 2: information about this. But we just love to leave our

1093
01:02:23,000 --> 01:02:27,560
Speaker 2: listeners with some advice on tools and resources that they

1094
01:02:27,560 --> 01:02:31,840
Speaker 2: can use. I've personally used better Help with being away

1095
01:02:31,880 --> 01:02:35,400
Speaker 2: from home wanting to get a therapist of color. I

1096
01:02:35,480 --> 01:02:37,520
Speaker 2: knew I wasn't going to get it here someone who

1097
01:02:37,560 --> 01:02:39,480
Speaker 2: could speak English. I knew I wasn't going to get

1098
01:02:39,520 --> 01:02:42,760
Speaker 2: it here. So I used better Help and that helped

1099
01:02:42,800 --> 01:02:46,840
Speaker 2: me at a time when I really needed it, especially

1100
01:02:46,920 --> 01:02:53,880
Speaker 2: transitioning to you know, life here and just being the

1101
01:02:53,920 --> 01:02:57,200
Speaker 2: only black girl in a lot of rooms and dealing

1102
01:02:57,200 --> 01:02:59,760
Speaker 2: with a lot of unresolved trauma that we spoke about.

1103
01:03:00,080 --> 01:03:03,000
Speaker 2: So you know, that was a tool I used. I

1104
01:03:03,080 --> 01:03:08,040
Speaker 2: know there are other resources available that you can look at,

1105
01:03:08,080 --> 01:03:11,320
Speaker 2: So I don't know if gentlemen, you can suggest any

1106
01:03:12,400 --> 01:03:15,000
Speaker 2: for for people to check out.

1107
01:03:15,360 --> 01:03:17,440
Speaker 4: Sorry, where are you? By the way, I'm.

1108
01:03:17,240 --> 01:03:21,520
Speaker 2: In the Czech Republic, Ah.

1109
01:03:21,640 --> 01:03:22,880
Speaker 3: Of course, you know the.

1110
01:03:25,560 --> 01:03:28,440
Speaker 4: Mecca of y Yeah, yeah.

1111
01:03:28,320 --> 01:03:31,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's where it's right there.

1112
01:03:33,400 --> 01:03:35,480
Speaker 4: So do you guys, like, like in a restaurant, do

1113
01:03:35,480 --> 01:03:37,960
Speaker 4: you say check please when you're done? Was that weird?

1114
01:03:38,200 --> 01:03:40,680
Speaker 2: They really don't like that because it's so cheesy. They're

1115
01:03:40,720 --> 01:03:44,440
Speaker 2: just like, seriously, and also check is not it's the

1116
01:03:44,560 --> 01:03:48,440
Speaker 2: name of the country is actually chess key republicska like

1117
01:03:48,480 --> 01:03:50,440
Speaker 2: in their language, it's different to how we say it

1118
01:03:50,440 --> 01:03:54,160
Speaker 2: in English anyway, so it's like whatever you're trying to pull.

1119
01:03:54,440 --> 01:03:57,280
Speaker 2: But there are some things that have like the check

1120
01:03:57,360 --> 01:03:59,760
Speaker 2: something check please check, like people do.

1121
01:03:59,800 --> 01:04:02,240
Speaker 4: Your self before you rank yourself.

1122
01:04:04,120 --> 01:04:06,320
Speaker 2: When I came, I was pulling those jokes and everyone's

1123
01:04:06,360 --> 01:04:08,520
Speaker 2: just like, we don't do that here.

1124
01:04:09,120 --> 01:04:11,760
Speaker 6: It must be yeah, you don't learn English from you the.

1125
01:04:13,280 --> 01:04:18,160
Speaker 2: Exactly. They're like teachers English women and leave hm hmm.

1126
01:04:20,200 --> 01:04:22,840
Speaker 4: Okay. Filled some some resources.

1127
01:04:26,440 --> 01:04:28,640
Speaker 3: Well, we're building out our page, so that's going to

1128
01:04:28,720 --> 01:04:30,720
Speaker 3: be done because we've got a bunch of resources that

1129
01:04:30,760 --> 01:04:33,040
Speaker 3: we're getting from our every partners. I would say check

1130
01:04:33,040 --> 01:04:36,280
Speaker 3: out Why to Love and Drive. The majority of our

1131
01:04:36,320 --> 01:04:40,040
Speaker 3: guests on the podcast all have their own websites with

1132
01:04:40,040 --> 01:04:43,000
Speaker 3: their own resources that they offer to the clients or

1133
01:04:43,000 --> 01:04:47,400
Speaker 3: even just people on social media. So shameless self plug

1134
01:04:47,480 --> 01:04:49,280
Speaker 3: but I think that's the quickest way is just.

1135
01:04:49,240 --> 01:04:52,280
Speaker 4: Go door fil Is it a shameless self prague?

1136
01:04:56,920 --> 01:05:01,840
Speaker 2: Oh no, oh no, we started something.

1137
01:05:02,840 --> 01:05:05,560
Speaker 3: Someone please kicking out the room, please someone kicking up?

1138
01:05:07,720 --> 01:05:10,360
Speaker 3: But yeah, I think start start there. I listened to

1139
01:05:10,440 --> 01:05:13,320
Speaker 3: a bunch of podcasts on the topic. It all depends

1140
01:05:13,360 --> 01:05:18,400
Speaker 3: on your interests. But I think the advantage of being

1141
01:05:19,400 --> 01:05:23,120
Speaker 3: being alive today is there's so many resources. Like if

1142
01:05:23,120 --> 01:05:25,600
Speaker 3: you feel that you're suffering in some form of way,

1143
01:05:25,600 --> 01:05:29,320
Speaker 3: if you really just have to google, just just google

1144
01:05:30,080 --> 01:05:35,120
Speaker 3: coping with depression, coping with homesickness, coping with anxiety, coping

1145
01:05:35,160 --> 01:05:38,080
Speaker 3: with me the only black women in the workforce. Guarant

1146
01:05:38,240 --> 01:05:41,720
Speaker 3: dmn T you will find resources available. The only thing

1147
01:05:41,760 --> 01:05:45,200
Speaker 3: I'd say is just learn to vets resources. So just

1148
01:05:45,320 --> 01:05:48,640
Speaker 3: make sure that the information you're being provided with is

1149
01:05:48,760 --> 01:05:51,440
Speaker 3: by qualified people. And the best way to do that

1150
01:05:51,560 --> 01:05:54,919
Speaker 3: is to make sure that these people have some form

1151
01:05:54,960 --> 01:05:57,760
Speaker 3: of complications and they're part of some sort of organization

1152
01:05:57,880 --> 01:06:02,240
Speaker 3: or community and they are active within that community, because

1153
01:06:02,360 --> 01:06:06,840
Speaker 3: those people then vet them for you. So if you

1154
01:06:06,920 --> 01:06:11,520
Speaker 3: come across quote unquote self help Google with no certifications

1155
01:06:11,760 --> 01:06:14,080
Speaker 3: and it's not part of some sort of self help

1156
01:06:14,280 --> 01:06:19,280
Speaker 3: Google certification board or group where other gurus are checking

1157
01:06:19,400 --> 01:06:22,640
Speaker 3: on what they're doing, trust and believe more than likely

1158
01:06:22,680 --> 01:06:25,080
Speaker 3: they're selling you snake oil. That's the simplest way of it.

1159
01:06:25,640 --> 01:06:29,240
Speaker 3: So I'd say do that. If they have published works

1160
01:06:29,240 --> 01:06:34,200
Speaker 3: in trusted medical journals, even better, you're no solid, but

1161
01:06:34,280 --> 01:06:36,520
Speaker 3: I'd say do that, Like there's so many reasons available.

1162
01:06:36,840 --> 01:06:39,320
Speaker 3: Then what we're trying to do is just make sure

1163
01:06:39,320 --> 01:06:42,920
Speaker 3: that there are resources available for blacks and bubbles, because

1164
01:06:42,960 --> 01:06:45,920
Speaker 3: that's where they're lacking. Because contextually you might struggle, but

1165
01:06:46,080 --> 01:06:49,120
Speaker 3: for the basics that's available, Like as you mentioned, there's

1166
01:06:49,160 --> 01:06:51,120
Speaker 3: better help, but as a trainer, is some better help

1167
01:06:52,200 --> 01:06:56,480
Speaker 3: African deapists. Yeah, you know, you might find a black therapist,

1168
01:06:56,840 --> 01:07:00,320
Speaker 3: but contextually, even someone who's black and me as well,

1169
01:07:00,320 --> 01:07:03,320
Speaker 3: there's stuff that they will just never understand. What the

1170
01:07:03,760 --> 01:07:08,680
Speaker 3: stuff they'll never get culturally. So but that's further down

1171
01:07:08,720 --> 01:07:10,560
Speaker 3: the line. If you're at the point where you just

1172
01:07:10,640 --> 01:07:12,600
Speaker 3: need help, let's google it and then just vet the

1173
01:07:12,600 --> 01:07:16,360
Speaker 3: people that are giving you advice and by all means

1174
01:07:16,440 --> 01:07:18,840
Speaker 3: make sure that it's not coming from the Joe Rogan podcast.

1175
01:07:19,240 --> 01:07:19,800
Speaker 3: You can be fine.

1176
01:07:22,080 --> 01:07:26,440
Speaker 4: Also, one of the guests that we had recently, he

1177
01:07:27,360 --> 01:07:34,120
Speaker 4: revealed to us that the number of you know, psychiatrists

1178
01:07:34,160 --> 01:07:36,640
Speaker 4: that exist in Zimbabwe can't how many did you say, Phil,

1179
01:07:36,920 --> 01:07:43,120
Speaker 4: I'm sure it was ten six six in the whole country.

1180
01:07:43,240 --> 01:07:46,440
Speaker 4: So it's it's no surprise that it's difficult to find

1181
01:07:46,480 --> 01:07:49,360
Speaker 4: one here. But I think we've we've done a pretty

1182
01:07:49,360 --> 01:07:52,280
Speaker 4: good job on the podcast so far, and and all

1183
01:07:52,320 --> 01:07:54,320
Speaker 4: credit goes to doctor your I for that. Doctor your

1184
01:07:54,360 --> 01:07:59,080
Speaker 4: ipow of of really identifying a lot of different professionals

1185
01:07:59,120 --> 01:08:03,640
Speaker 4: in different space is within you know, therapy and mental

1186
01:08:03,640 --> 01:08:07,640
Speaker 4: health and mental wellness as a whole, across all kinds

1187
01:08:07,640 --> 01:08:10,160
Speaker 4: of there's there's something for you, definitely, whether it's art

1188
01:08:10,240 --> 01:08:14,080
Speaker 4: therapy or music therapy or whatever, or just you know,

1189
01:08:14,320 --> 01:08:17,720
Speaker 4: regular go sit down in front of a psychiatrist's kind

1190
01:08:17,720 --> 01:08:20,320
Speaker 4: of situation. So just checking out the podcast. I know

1191
01:08:20,360 --> 01:08:23,559
Speaker 4: it's less funny and joky than our regular podcast, but

1192
01:08:23,600 --> 01:08:26,160
Speaker 4: Mental Wellness Mondays is now up. It's part of the

1193
01:08:26,200 --> 01:08:28,599
Speaker 4: two brook Timbos network, So if you subscribe to brook Timbos,

1194
01:08:28,640 --> 01:08:30,680
Speaker 4: you'll be able to get that podcast. And a lot

1195
01:08:30,680 --> 01:08:32,799
Speaker 4: of the time the episodes are thirty to forty five minutes.

1196
01:08:32,800 --> 01:08:35,120
Speaker 4: You can just just hit play on it while you're

1197
01:08:35,160 --> 01:08:38,400
Speaker 4: doing something else. And there's all kinds of resources, ideas,

1198
01:08:38,400 --> 01:08:40,280
Speaker 4: thoughts that always come up in that podcast, So you're

1199
01:08:40,280 --> 01:08:43,519
Speaker 4: welcome to check that out. Another thing is if you

1200
01:08:43,520 --> 01:08:46,360
Speaker 4: don't want to, the ultimate goal is get a therapist.

1201
01:08:46,400 --> 01:08:48,559
Speaker 4: I think we've spoken about that on here, we speak

1202
01:08:48,560 --> 01:08:50,640
Speaker 4: about it on the podcast, find a therapist, find some

1203
01:08:50,760 --> 01:08:53,240
Speaker 4: way to speak to someone. But if you're not ready

1204
01:08:53,240 --> 01:08:54,800
Speaker 4: to take that step, or you can't or you can't

1205
01:08:54,800 --> 01:08:57,519
Speaker 4: afford it, or maybe you're not sure what it's like,

1206
01:08:58,640 --> 01:09:01,679
Speaker 4: I think it's I think it's such a potentially good

1207
01:09:01,760 --> 01:09:05,639
Speaker 4: thing to send in your problem anonymously and we'll put

1208
01:09:05,640 --> 01:09:07,320
Speaker 4: it in front of a therapist and you can hear

1209
01:09:07,360 --> 01:09:10,080
Speaker 4: what they'll say, and you can hear where they would

1210
01:09:10,080 --> 01:09:14,439
Speaker 4: direct you. And and I mean, it's it's almost like

1211
01:09:14,479 --> 01:09:17,559
Speaker 4: a free trial of therapy before you buy. So two

1212
01:09:17,560 --> 01:09:19,880
Speaker 4: brook Timbos dot com. Fort Slash Help is something that

1213
01:09:19,880 --> 01:09:21,640
Speaker 4: you can also just write whatever's on your mind. You

1214
01:09:21,640 --> 01:09:24,800
Speaker 4: can be anonymous if you like, make yourself a fake

1215
01:09:24,880 --> 01:09:27,800
Speaker 4: name if you want. Uh And and we will at

1216
01:09:27,800 --> 01:09:29,520
Speaker 4: some point get it addressed by a professional.

1217
01:09:31,000 --> 01:09:31,280
Speaker 2: M h.

1218
01:09:32,680 --> 01:09:35,680
Speaker 6: And can we normalize couples go into therapy too?

1219
01:09:37,000 --> 01:09:37,519
Speaker 2: I'm married?

1220
01:09:37,800 --> 01:09:38,559
Speaker 4: Can you cut that out?

1221
01:09:38,960 --> 01:09:39,120
Speaker 2: Oh?

1222
01:09:39,439 --> 01:09:40,960
Speaker 4: Oh gosh, I'm kidding.

1223
01:09:46,040 --> 01:09:49,360
Speaker 5: And it's like maybe you could actually work through it anyway.

1224
01:09:49,560 --> 01:09:51,960
Speaker 2: Sorry, for sure.

1225
01:09:51,960 --> 01:09:57,400
Speaker 4: It sounds like there's something going on, savage. We'll deal

1226
01:09:57,479 --> 01:09:58,160
Speaker 4: it another time.

1227
01:10:00,040 --> 01:10:09,519
Speaker 7: It's okay, It's okay, mister I mean, mister, just normalize that,

1228
01:10:10,920 --> 01:10:13,880
Speaker 7: just just maybe just given to one time, you know,

1229
01:10:13,880 --> 01:10:15,160
Speaker 7: I mean, just go to therapy.

1230
01:10:15,200 --> 01:10:16,759
Speaker 3: You're like, you know, you don't even have to pay attention,

1231
01:10:16,840 --> 01:10:18,720
Speaker 3: you know, just pretend to be there and then when

1232
01:10:18,720 --> 01:10:21,640
Speaker 3: you come back, your game like therapy. So can you

1233
01:10:21,680 --> 01:10:24,479
Speaker 3: please let me go watch the game for like three weekends,

1234
01:10:24,560 --> 01:10:25,960
Speaker 3: you know what I mean? Stuff like that, you know,

1235
01:10:26,120 --> 01:10:27,439
Speaker 3: just be good.

1236
01:10:27,280 --> 01:10:31,519
Speaker 4: For you, and and and and as well. I think, ruby,

1237
01:10:31,880 --> 01:10:34,320
Speaker 4: do you think do you think in in in the

1238
01:10:34,360 --> 01:10:38,720
Speaker 4: Czech Republic the like, is there a lot of emphasis

1239
01:10:38,760 --> 01:10:42,240
Speaker 4: on on mental wellness mental health? I somehow have the

1240
01:10:42,280 --> 01:10:44,480
Speaker 4: thought in my head that it's also a lot more traditional.

1241
01:10:45,320 --> 01:10:49,920
Speaker 2: They are more traditional but also progressive in some ways.

1242
01:10:49,960 --> 01:10:56,240
Speaker 2: It's quite fascinating. But for example, I teach English at

1243
01:10:56,240 --> 01:10:59,280
Speaker 2: a school and they have an in house therapist for

1244
01:10:59,400 --> 01:11:03,040
Speaker 2: the children to if they have issues, and they talk

1245
01:11:03,160 --> 01:11:06,559
Speaker 2: to the parents, they talk to the children too. So

1246
01:11:06,920 --> 01:11:11,400
Speaker 2: it also depends there's help to work through things, for sure,

1247
01:11:11,880 --> 01:11:15,160
Speaker 2: But they also have elements of them like any society

1248
01:11:15,200 --> 01:11:19,559
Speaker 2: where they are more reserved in terms of I don't

1249
01:11:19,560 --> 01:11:24,880
Speaker 2: think it's there's open to therapy maybe in some other places,

1250
01:11:25,200 --> 01:11:28,800
Speaker 2: but the resources are there if that makes sense. It's

1251
01:11:28,840 --> 01:11:34,920
Speaker 2: still there are a lot of parallel sometimes I draw

1252
01:11:35,120 --> 01:11:41,760
Speaker 2: with checks and Zimbabweans at times where there there used

1253
01:11:41,760 --> 01:11:44,200
Speaker 2: to be a higher level of patriarchy, but now it's

1254
01:11:44,240 --> 01:11:49,760
Speaker 2: like women and men aren't the same, are equal pretty much, and.

1255
01:11:50,560 --> 01:11:52,760
Speaker 4: That's definitely happening where you are.

1256
01:11:54,640 --> 01:11:57,840
Speaker 2: No, but but they've had a long history of like

1257
01:11:58,160 --> 01:12:01,639
Speaker 2: maybe not not being the same. So it's like they're

1258
01:12:01,720 --> 01:12:05,519
Speaker 2: like what Zimbabwe could be in a while. But they

1259
01:12:05,560 --> 01:12:08,920
Speaker 2: still have sort of traditional values and traditional views too,

1260
01:12:09,200 --> 01:12:13,600
Speaker 2: like about men men go drink beer and you know

1261
01:12:13,640 --> 01:12:15,800
Speaker 2: what I mean, Like things like that that still play

1262
01:12:15,800 --> 01:12:18,840
Speaker 2: a part, but they're progressive in other ways, like men

1263
01:12:19,120 --> 01:12:24,519
Speaker 2: taking care of children and you know, being supportive, having

1264
01:12:24,640 --> 01:12:29,360
Speaker 2: paternity leave, things like that. So it's quite interesting. Even

1265
01:12:29,360 --> 01:12:33,800
Speaker 2: though mothers still pray play a dominant role, fathers and

1266
01:12:33,840 --> 01:12:39,720
Speaker 2: mothers are equally involved in children's lives. Therapy happens, so

1267
01:12:39,760 --> 01:12:43,840
Speaker 2: on and so forth. So I think they are there

1268
01:12:43,880 --> 01:12:48,880
Speaker 2: are definitely resources. I just do think the mindset is

1269
01:12:48,880 --> 01:12:52,720
Speaker 2: not as open as other countries around therapy. That's how

1270
01:12:52,760 --> 01:13:00,880
Speaker 2: I feel. I'm getting married, you are married. No, I'm

1271
01:13:00,880 --> 01:13:02,400
Speaker 2: getting married. I'm engaged.

1272
01:13:04,960 --> 01:13:07,320
Speaker 3: Out of interest? Is he is.

1273
01:13:07,320 --> 01:13:10,000
Speaker 4: He Is he black?

1274
01:13:10,120 --> 01:13:16,400
Speaker 2: No, he's not. That his check he's check mm hmm yeah.

1275
01:13:18,320 --> 01:13:19,879
Speaker 4: My sister, my sister.

1276
01:13:20,040 --> 01:13:24,600
Speaker 8: First of all, congratulations, but also my sister, can you

1277
01:13:24,720 --> 01:13:29,439
Speaker 8: not see that first they take our land, then they

1278
01:13:29,479 --> 01:13:33,160
Speaker 8: take our resources, and now they take our women's.

1279
01:13:33,640 --> 01:13:37,120
Speaker 2: Sorry, my internet is breaking up. Sorry.

1280
01:13:38,360 --> 01:13:44,280
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah for checking for the Czech Republic therapy for

1281
01:13:44,439 --> 01:13:50,160
Speaker 4: men online. M but we call it brohemia.

1282
01:13:51,120 --> 01:13:52,439
Speaker 5: He just really wants a putn.

1283
01:13:55,520 --> 01:14:00,000
Speaker 2: I mean, I gotta add it to your brain works amazingly. Really,

1284
01:14:00,600 --> 01:14:02,400
Speaker 2: I love it. I love it. I love a good

1285
01:14:02,479 --> 01:14:09,320
Speaker 2: cheesy Please please time to jake out? No?

1286
01:14:09,960 --> 01:14:16,439
Speaker 3: Yeah, mmmm? So is your is your man? Also? Is he?

1287
01:14:16,680 --> 01:14:18,720
Speaker 3: Or is he? You?

1288
01:14:18,840 --> 01:14:20,680
Speaker 2: Ask you? Amanda?

1289
01:14:20,880 --> 01:14:29,519
Speaker 4: Mister Amanda, mister Amanda's Germans. Yeah, guys, okay, can can

1290
01:14:29,560 --> 01:14:31,200
Speaker 4: your next guest be doctor Umar?

1291
01:14:31,360 --> 01:14:31,679
Speaker 3: Please?

1292
01:14:33,479 --> 01:14:34,080
Speaker 2: That man?

1293
01:14:36,520 --> 01:14:41,439
Speaker 6: If I see I'm like this, I need to have

1294
01:14:41,479 --> 01:14:42,720
Speaker 6: a word with him.

1295
01:14:43,320 --> 01:14:43,920
Speaker 4: I think you do.

1296
01:14:44,160 --> 01:14:45,720
Speaker 5: Episode that's an episode?

1297
01:14:46,720 --> 01:14:49,280
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think you do. You need to have a

1298
01:14:49,320 --> 01:14:51,960
Speaker 4: word with him.

1299
01:14:52,880 --> 01:14:54,759
Speaker 3: You're indiscretions masters.

1300
01:14:55,680 --> 01:14:58,280
Speaker 4: One day, may I request the podcast The.

1301
01:14:58,120 --> 01:15:01,160
Speaker 5: Man in the diaspora are not the breed? Can I

1302
01:15:01,240 --> 01:15:04,639
Speaker 5: just say that, like, let's let's.

1303
01:15:04,479 --> 01:15:11,240
Speaker 2: Let's let's not get into it doesn't sound sounds.

1304
01:15:10,920 --> 01:15:13,680
Speaker 5: Like we need to dive deeper into these topics.

1305
01:15:13,840 --> 01:15:17,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, we need to rehab on this one.

1306
01:15:18,280 --> 01:15:20,479
Speaker 4: I would love to hear this as a podcast. You know,

1307
01:15:20,680 --> 01:15:24,080
Speaker 4: what is it that you've noticed the differences? And why

1308
01:15:24,479 --> 01:15:25,320
Speaker 4: what they drove?

1309
01:15:25,720 --> 01:15:28,679
Speaker 5: Plenty plenty plenty.

1310
01:15:29,320 --> 01:15:33,600
Speaker 4: So mister does does mister does mister roomy understand the

1311
01:15:33,640 --> 01:15:35,040
Speaker 4: intricacies of paying cows?

1312
01:15:37,479 --> 01:15:42,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's gonna have to, he's gonna have yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

1313
01:15:42,400 --> 01:15:44,880
Speaker 2: I had to explain break it down. They used to

1314
01:15:44,920 --> 01:15:47,599
Speaker 2: have a tradition like that, but like a hundred years ago.

1315
01:15:47,680 --> 01:15:50,320
Speaker 2: So he was like, oh, like that was one hundred

1316
01:15:50,400 --> 01:15:54,200
Speaker 2: years yeah.

1317
01:15:52,680 --> 01:15:56,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, but we're doing now. Okay, yeah, now let's go.

1318
01:15:58,040 --> 01:15:58,559
Speaker 4: Do you think.

1319
01:16:00,320 --> 01:16:06,280
Speaker 2: Would have been like, hey, come through like no way, na, na,

1320
01:16:07,320 --> 01:16:16,200
Speaker 2: no way. He's like, you may be marrying that that European.

1321
01:16:18,800 --> 01:16:25,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, definitely have no Ultimately another joke. We're happy for

1322
01:16:25,120 --> 01:16:26,639
Speaker 3: you guys. I mean, Dan and I would not exist

1323
01:16:26,800 --> 01:16:30,600
Speaker 3: if we open up international relationships. So, you know, we understand,

1324
01:16:31,040 --> 01:16:33,960
Speaker 3: and I think sometimes people take it a little too seriously.

1325
01:16:34,040 --> 01:16:39,080
Speaker 4: You know, I do believe that in you know, in

1326
01:16:39,600 --> 01:16:41,600
Speaker 4: I don't know, a thousand years the whole world is

1327
01:16:41,600 --> 01:16:42,799
Speaker 4: going to be Paige say.

1328
01:16:45,000 --> 01:16:48,920
Speaker 2: Thousand, you know, and our parents started it because my

1329
01:16:48,920 --> 01:16:51,639
Speaker 2: my parents, like my mom is shown now, my dad

1330
01:16:51,720 --> 01:16:55,360
Speaker 2: is like already, like even if they try, they already

1331
01:16:55,400 --> 01:16:59,040
Speaker 2: it was intercultural. And we know like that in La

1332
01:16:59,200 --> 01:17:04,559
Speaker 2: there was some you know, tension, so at their level,

1333
01:17:04,640 --> 01:17:09,240
Speaker 2: that was the sort of inter cultural. So I think

1334
01:17:09,280 --> 01:17:12,040
Speaker 2: when they found out, they also referred back to their

1335
01:17:12,160 --> 01:17:15,760
Speaker 2: own experiences when they were getting married too, so.

1336
01:17:17,439 --> 01:17:19,439
Speaker 5: Playing to check Republic already knew.

1337
01:17:19,439 --> 01:17:25,920
Speaker 6: They were like, it's all right, yeah, anyway, won't take

1338
01:17:25,960 --> 01:17:29,320
Speaker 6: too much up of your time. We do really appreciate

1339
01:17:29,360 --> 01:17:33,280
Speaker 6: you guys jumping on and conversing with us, especially on

1340
01:17:33,320 --> 01:17:34,679
Speaker 6: this very important topic.

1341
01:17:35,280 --> 01:17:38,120
Speaker 5: So so grateful to tend that. Thank you.

1342
01:17:39,120 --> 01:17:46,479
Speaker 2: M hm. That's our manager.

1343
01:17:47,520 --> 01:17:55,160
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, look, I don't know what has to happen,

1344
01:17:55,240 --> 01:18:00,120
Speaker 4: but whether mister Rumby has to send them.

1345
01:18:00,240 --> 01:18:05,400
Speaker 2: After mister Ruby, here's this episode, this last portion, he

1346
01:18:05,520 --> 01:18:08,320
Speaker 2: might have some thoughts that maybe the invote should be reversed,

1347
01:18:08,600 --> 01:18:13,080
Speaker 2: like he should be getting pleased check please, I'm choking.

1348
01:18:14,000 --> 01:18:18,160
Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean, look, look, we we accept, we accept,

1349
01:18:19,120 --> 01:18:23,320
Speaker 4: we accept, except.

1350
01:18:23,320 --> 01:18:31,800
Speaker 2: They haven't taken on the and yes, not Corona, not

1351
01:18:31,840 --> 01:18:33,280
Speaker 2: to be confused with the row rope.

1352
01:18:33,920 --> 01:18:36,280
Speaker 3: But mm hmm.

1353
01:18:36,760 --> 01:18:40,040
Speaker 5: Any closing remarks.

1354
01:18:39,640 --> 01:18:42,920
Speaker 2: No, honestly, this has been great. I think real talk

1355
01:18:44,160 --> 01:18:47,080
Speaker 2: a lot, a lot of respect for you, gentlemen, for

1356
01:18:47,240 --> 01:18:53,799
Speaker 2: what you're doing and how you're spearheading these conversations, especially

1357
01:18:53,840 --> 01:18:58,120
Speaker 2: having both the platform that you guys have, especially because

1358
01:18:58,280 --> 01:19:01,760
Speaker 2: people listen to you. Especially, do you understand, like I think,

1359
01:19:01,800 --> 01:19:06,080
Speaker 2: it's such a great thing that you're out there doing

1360
01:19:06,120 --> 01:19:10,880
Speaker 2: the thing, especially in our country and for our people.

1361
01:19:11,960 --> 01:19:16,439
Speaker 2: So thank you so much for your time. Yeah, honestly,

1362
01:19:16,720 --> 01:19:20,200
Speaker 2: I couldn't. I don't have much else to say aside

1363
01:19:20,200 --> 01:19:23,479
Speaker 2: from thank you. It was very insightful and very helpful.

1364
01:19:23,800 --> 01:19:27,439
Speaker 2: And yeah, I don't know if you, gentlemen, want to

1365
01:19:27,479 --> 01:19:31,400
Speaker 2: share any of your what's happening upcoming projects. You've told

1366
01:19:31,479 --> 01:19:36,640
Speaker 2: us about your podcast Mental Health Mondays or is that

1367
01:19:36,680 --> 01:19:41,479
Speaker 2: what you call it? Mental health Monday? I apologize Mental

1368
01:19:41,520 --> 01:19:46,559
Speaker 2: Wellness Mondays and anything else coming up that we should

1369
01:19:46,600 --> 01:19:49,440
Speaker 2: look for. Where can we find you on the socials

1370
01:19:49,520 --> 01:19:53,360
Speaker 2: on the you already told us your website to break Twimbos.

1371
01:19:53,560 --> 01:19:56,120
Speaker 2: We will link it all actually in this episode notes,

1372
01:19:56,600 --> 01:20:00,960
Speaker 2: so we will link to the podcast web site. Your

1373
01:20:01,000 --> 01:20:04,040
Speaker 2: personal is it Okay, if we link your personal or

1374
01:20:04,080 --> 01:20:07,320
Speaker 2: we just leave the two group trimbles only on there,

1375
01:20:07,400 --> 01:20:08,280
Speaker 2: you'll let us know.

1376
01:20:09,320 --> 01:20:13,839
Speaker 4: So whatever you know, we can.

1377
01:20:13,600 --> 01:20:20,360
Speaker 2: Have whatever we like. Okay, super Yeah. So anything else,

1378
01:20:20,400 --> 01:20:22,680
Speaker 2: anything coming up that we should look out for, we

1379
01:20:22,880 --> 01:20:25,800
Speaker 2: need like to share with the people. Please, this is

1380
01:20:25,840 --> 01:20:28,240
Speaker 2: your time to do your thing.

1381
01:20:29,360 --> 01:20:32,280
Speaker 4: Damn not say nothing. Now it looks like we're not organized.

1382
01:20:33,200 --> 01:20:38,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, so next week catch me shopping for grossarties at

1383
01:20:38,400 --> 01:20:43,000
Speaker 3: your logout supermarket. No, seriously, last year was our biggest year.

1384
01:20:43,000 --> 01:20:47,240
Speaker 3: It's just been a busy time, so so recapping, but

1385
01:20:47,360 --> 01:20:50,280
Speaker 3: last year was by bound our biggest day yet. This

1386
01:20:50,439 --> 01:20:52,519
Speaker 3: year is already looking like it's going to be even bigger.

1387
01:20:52,880 --> 01:20:54,720
Speaker 3: So just follow us on the socials. There's a lot

1388
01:20:54,760 --> 01:20:57,479
Speaker 3: going on. We do have a lot planned, a lot

1389
01:20:57,600 --> 01:21:01,200
Speaker 3: lined up, a lot of the works. So yeah, I

1390
01:21:01,280 --> 01:21:04,040
Speaker 3: just just follow us on the socials and if you

1391
01:21:04,400 --> 01:21:06,720
Speaker 3: like what we're saying, subscribe to podcast. Then if you

1392
01:21:07,120 --> 01:21:09,679
Speaker 3: really really like us, then please do support us because

1393
01:21:09,760 --> 01:21:15,880
Speaker 3: we will need not only people to support the podcast

1394
01:21:15,920 --> 01:21:17,760
Speaker 3: and keep like going, but we also do need people

1395
01:21:17,800 --> 01:21:21,280
Speaker 3: to support the therapy. It so all the therapy that

1396
01:21:21,280 --> 01:21:24,320
Speaker 3: we provide to listeners to people that I need is

1397
01:21:24,600 --> 01:21:29,080
Speaker 3: funded by not only ourselves, by podcast listeners, So if

1398
01:21:29,080 --> 01:21:34,840
Speaker 3: you can, we'd love your assistance. We appreciate that. Yeah,

1399
01:21:34,880 --> 01:21:38,240
Speaker 3: and besides that, just you know, just let's make the

1400
01:21:38,240 --> 01:21:39,000
Speaker 3: world the pleasure.

1401
01:21:39,160 --> 01:21:41,600
Speaker 4: And if you're looking for relationship advice, you can just

1402
01:21:41,680 --> 01:21:45,559
Speaker 4: DM me with your proof of PayPal or whichever payment

1403
01:21:45,640 --> 01:21:48,280
Speaker 4: method you can get your daily pieces of advice.

1404
01:21:50,200 --> 01:21:55,599
Speaker 9: Mm hmmm h m hm m hm oh yeah, yeah,

1405
01:21:55,920 --> 01:22:00,559
Speaker 9: I manage you have anything that you want to say.

1406
01:22:01,120 --> 01:22:04,920
Speaker 2: Thank you so much for listening again. Thank you to

1407
01:22:05,080 --> 01:22:08,559
Speaker 2: Phil and Dan, or the Two Broke twmbles as they're known.

1408
01:22:09,840 --> 01:22:13,080
Speaker 2: We are so glad to be back and we look

1409
01:22:13,120 --> 01:22:16,679
Speaker 2: forward to seeing you again soon. Take care of your body. Bye.

1410
01:22:17,160 --> 01:22:20,160
Speaker 6: Don't you know all the black guys, Oh my gosh,

1411
01:22:20,200 --> 01:22:20,479
Speaker 6: thank you

1412
01:22:23,160 --> 01:22:24,519
Speaker 3: Little well use your hand